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1moremilgram-enjoyer · 1 year ago

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Thus commences the last in the "Haru bugs FF about Milgram" series, with only two more characters to put on the table !! ...Huh? Ask in my inbox? What ask in my inbox, I have no idea what you're talking about !! Aha !! Ahahahaa !! (i swear i'm getting to answering it i'm sorry for the wait) The last two on the list is Green Anime Baby (/ref) and Schrodinger's Sexuality, both of which you have already talked about before but this can serve as an opportunity to say whatever else is on your mind regarding them

The end of an era, really. The final two people.

Take your time on my ask! It's pretty hard to get so many thoughts on these characters in words, because there's a lot to them, so.

CW: Internalized homophobia, suicide and murder, cults and indoctrination, child abuse, heavy Amane apologism.

EDIT: On second read, I may have come off a bit strong with the Amane apologism. Keep in mind most of it’s hyperbole. I recognize her actions are morally grey, that’s the fun of it, but this isn’t a serious analysis. This is a collection of brainrot, and so I’m letting myself indulge in mindless Amane apologism, hope it’s not too much of a bother.

Let's start with Kazui. The (allegedly) gay (possibly) aromantic old man. Yeah, the aro/gay reading has grown on me since I made that Cat post. Though I'm biased towards the aro thing for obvious reasons.

Anyways, I like him! For the final time there is the issue of sexual attraction being a decently big part of someone's character, and me not really being able to relate to that, but at least this one has the whole thing about lying and societal expectations which makes it a bit more interesting for me. I personally have never had any big issues with my sexuality after I figured it out, but I can sympathize with his struggles to an extent. More than I can sympathize with Mahiru anyways.

I am always inclined to like characters who lie a lot, because it makes them more interesting to analyze. I tend to prefer when they aren't constantly telling everyone they're a liar, but Kazui isn't as annoying about it as some other characters (if I can like Kokichi I'll survive Kazui's thing). Kazui is cool because there's always the tiny doubt in my mind that maybe we're making a horrible horrible mistake by voting him inno this trial, but the more logical part of me knows that really isn't the case probably.

Shame his songs aren't really my kinda thing. I like Cat well enough, and I think half is good too, they're just not what I usually listen to.

I think it's funny his first instinct in his first VD was to try and apprehend Es, very funny guy. In particular, I think one of the most hilarious things that I've seen from Milgram so far is when someone before the release of Cat shipped him with the bartender just so Milgram could have a "Gay or European" parody, which is great, watch it if you haven't, and then it became canon (in theory).

As you know, I'm currently voting him Innocent, not just because of the whole "defending the others" thing, but because he clearly regrets what he did, he didn't mean to kill Hinako in the first place, so while what he did was pretty shitty, I don't think it's completely unforgivable.

I'm honestly coming up a bit blank on what to say about him other than the stuff I've sorta already talked about. I'll talk about the interrogations later, because right now I'm sorta distracted... by her.

Look at her!!!!

Look at how silly she is!!! She is not mentally stable but she slays that insanity look!!!

There's more of them??? This is fantastic!!! I love that for her!!!

Look at how happy she is, going to commit first degree murder!!! Yes, go literally slay queen! Kill 'em! Make them suffer >:D!!

(That last image and her murder shot may be my favorite Milgram frames btw)

I love her a lot a lot. To make it clear to you, I like her about as much, if not even more, than Min. Yeah, that's the critical levels of brainrot we're dealing with here.

She's just so fantastic honestly. Her entire story and personality and capital S Silliness is just fascinating, I could think and talk about her forever. It's hard for me to put into words, because I think about her and I start vibrating. Hands are shaking because Amane too awesome.

Amane is the reason why I even got into Milgram in the first place, you know? Like, I was seeing it pop up around my dash every now and then, but I was content to kinda ignore it... until I started seeing fanart of this weird little girl standing in an army of clones, and she looked a little... a little silly you know? I wanted to see what the deal was, and so I started obssessing over Milgram, so.

And what a time to join. Purge March may not be my favorite song musically (it's probably fifth after Backdraft, MeMe, Harrow and Bring it On. Magic is a bit below that but I also like that one), but it's probably overall my favorite MV of the series. Amane's an incredibly interesting character, the visuals are awesome, and lyrically it's amazing. Literally my only complaint is that it isn't longer, like please under three minutes? The shortest fucking MV in the series?! Evil /lh

One of my favorite Milgram lines in general is:

After you cry, repent, and kneel, it’s now your turn to say that hopeless “I’m sorry” You’re sorry? I don’t care! Please, go ahead and die already!

Just the almost jarring shift from "like our religion ordains, everything will be back to normal if you just apologize and repent :)" to "I don't care what you do, I hate you and I want you dead" is fuckaingadjk yes Amane go go go kill 'em! I don't care if you try to excuse your actions by twisting your cult's teachings so much you actually contradict them! That just makes it even better!

Yeah my sense of morality cannot properly process Amane's crimes as actually evil. Honestly she could kill the entire cast and I'd forgive her. Sounds like a skill issue on their part not gonna lie. Just let her stab Shidou, come on! Let her brainwash Fuuta! If she has DID, then let one of the alters not afflicted by Milgram rules stab Es! I think that'd be very funny.

God, she's just asodak`+ anda alsldk

Sorry, I'm normal again <- Kazui-core statement (aka a lie).

Amane's just really awesome. I can't properly make a character analysis here because I will simply explode and I'd like to survive to see her third trial MV. I think I'll love it no matter what it is, but I do have some things I would particularly adore. Bassically I just want her to go feral, just- just go insane. My inner Veronika in full swing, I wanna see a play by play of her murder and just her covered in blood and screaming like yeah girl beat 'em up! I've seen some people suggest she should just turn into a monster in her MV and that would be so awesome. I am so immensely normal about her holy fuck do you understand.

Obviously I think she should be voted Innocent this trial. Because I'm pretty sure there's just no coming back from a second Guilty, so we're essentially dooming her and irreversably breaking her psyche. Shidou will probably survive any physical wounds she could possibly inflict, but I'm not entirely sure Amane would be able to recover after a Guilty. I also have a full draft talking about all the ways voting her Guilty just to protect Shidou could go wrong (Fuuta could attack in her place/there's a chance it wouldn't even stop Amane/Amane could sabotage medical equipment even while Guilty/Amane might still have the "first stage of physical restraints" from Trial 1 making a second Guilty redundant/DID could let her skip over the rules/etc). So overall I think Innocent is by far the better option, and I hope the way she's bleeding Inno percentage is some sort of statistical quirk and not her actually losing ground on absolute terms...

... But.

Listen, an inno is absolutely the best option in my mind. But if she gets voted Guilty, after I cry for a few months straight...

I am going to be so excited to see what she does in Trial 3. My inner Veronika coming out again, I wanna see how bad she gets. The more terrible and feral she becomes, I'll only love her more. I want to see all the horrible things she's willing to do and say without justification (/ref). God Kami-sama I need therapy.

Ehem. Anyways, I like Amane a lot.

And there's the dynamics, the dynamics! I've already brainrotted about her and Fuuta a bit on his post, but holy shit I love them so much. I want them to get out of Milgram and be silly together. They really are the siblings ever. Fuuta would introduce Amane to all sort of online and self-indulgent stuff she probably wouldn't have had access to before, helping her reconnect with her own desires and happiness, and Amane would try to get him to touch some grass and fail miserably. They are probably my favorite prisoner duo overall; they're both already silly on their own, and their silliness is multiplied exponentially when they are together.

Like, you gotta understand. It's not just that they are objectively hilarious together and they should hang out all the time always. There's also the parallels. Have you ever noticed how they both present themselves as heroes in their own ways (knight and magical girl)?

That they both want nothing more than to impress the very people who are pushing them to do bad things?

[Magic] I hope, I hope everyone can be happy and smile

[Backdraft] Tolerate, impress those spectators

The way Fuuta sees judgement as fire while Amane sees it as rain?

And justavs jas doj oq

God I am exploding I am going crazy like O2 I'm burning myself into oblivion I'm undeniably inequivocally definitely completely insane-

Okay I'm calm now. I need to stop thinking about 0308 parallels because I will simply combust. So we're moving on to-

Oh fuck the Es parallels too!

Amane: We’ve talked about this before. There are things more important than the law. That would be our teachings. Es: I won’t acknowledge you turning such selfish rules into a standard of judgment. I won’t allow it. End of story. A: … E: Both religion and faith are free. However, a doctrine can’t become a universal standard of judgment. A: You fool. Isn’t Milgram trying to enforce a new standard of judgment precisely because laws cannot guide this world onto the right path? Are you still being weighed down by the law?

E: Shut your mouth…! I am the one casting the judgements here! A: Hehehe. And how does that set you apart from us?

A: “We”? What’s “we”? Are you not just “I”? E: … I…? A: Aren’t we the same? Me and Warden-san. You know, I’m aware that I’m out of the ordinary. That my environment was peculiar, and that everyone else is normal.

What if I just ascend into another realm? What then? Can I still post my silly little thoughts from the world beyond?

Listen, there's so much to talk about with these two. I've already said I'm a sucker for protag foils, and Amane may be the most direct foil Es has alongside Fuuta and possibly Kotoko. Not to even mention their sibling dynamic, too, only matched in awesomeness by 0308!

E: No matter what you do, no matter how grown-up you behave – you’re a child. That’s an unchangeable truth. A: You’re a child, too! E: Wrong. I’m fifteen, so I’m an adult in Puerto Rico and Haiti. You’re twelve, so you’re a child no matter the country. A: …!! E: Hehe. You look angry. A: I don’t. E: You do. A: I don’t!

Actual sibling behavior what the hell. I think they should stick together if they get outta the hell prison.

Honestly it's ridiculous how awesome this girl is. I could talk about her and her parallels with all prisoners for days straight. I am not normal about her.

It's not even the prisoners either! Like, have you heard of the Sacred Texts, the godforsaken fucking cat parallels?! I'm going crazy just thinking about them. The only reason I haven't posted 15000 different posts about it is because Amane PhD haver Dr purgemarchlockdown has already talked about it so much. But they are so incredible. Animal cover goes hard, too. I have to listen to all of those at some point.

I will be so upset if she doesn't end up Innocent this trial (not as in mad, as in extremely depressed and a bit mad). I've even tried to cope by thinking of how it's mathematically possible she's actually been getting more Inno votes than Guilty but her percentage is dropping anyways due to statistical quirks and please tell me once the percentage stabilizes it will hover around like 53% give me some graphs I want to try to make some predictions please augh-

Anyways I need to calm down or I will never be able to post this.

So let's look at interrogation questions! New ones come out soon, yeah? I'm excited to talk about them when it happens (and after someone translates lol). Kazui first!

(T1) Q2: Is there anyone you hold in high esteem?

K: You wouldn't know them, but I have a childhood friend. I really look up to them. Sorry for bringing up someone you'd have no clue about.

(T1) Q17: What would you do if the world ends tomorrow?

K: I would lazily do some fishing. My childhood friend who I talked about earlier has a boat.

Childhood friends to lovers AO3 tag is strong with this one huh. Hope his Trial 3 MV contains a scene of him fishing. It's just a funny image really.

(T1) Q3: If you were allowed to do anything, what would you want to do?

K: I'd like to live righteously.

(T1) Q4: Do you think that your family is proud of you?

K: No. They must find me embarrassing.

(T1) Q7: Do you like yourself?

K: I can't really say I do.

(T1) Q19: Do you want to be forgiven?

K: I'm not sure. I also want my weakness to be tolerated, to be honest.

Yeah, the (alleged) internalized homophobia is strong with this one, huh. I'm assuming that's what he's referring to when he says "weakness" unfortunately. I hope he gets therapy when he gets out of Milgram. But you can say the same about all the sillies I guess.

(T1) Q5: When you go to an amusement park, what do you like to ride?

K: The merry-go-round. I actually want to try riding on one.

What. Is this. Is this related to the merry-go-round in I Love You? Like Kazui wanting to try being in a relationship where the love is (somewhat at least) reciprocated? Will think on this more later. Maybe.

(T1) Q6: What is the difference between an adult and a child?

K: Responsibility. Adults can't just go and do whatever they want.

One day I'll start making posts about the prisoner pairs and this will come up in 0708 but I am currently unable to think more about Amane without imploding so.

(T1) Q12: What is the meaning of life?

K:I wonder what. If you find out, kindly come and tell this old man.

(T1) Q14: Do you listen to music?

K: Well, a decent amount. I'm sure you wouldn't know them because they're all old songs.

Why does my guy always talk like he's about to die from old age. Dude you're not even 40 you have literally half (song reference hah) of your life left at least, at least try to live it you know?

(T1) Q15: When do you wake up/go to bed?

K: Because I don't have a job now, I'm letting myself act freely. I sleep whenever I get sleepy, and get up before noon.

I've always wondered about this one. Retirement for police officers in Japan is around 60 years usually, so there's gotta be some other reason my guy's unemployed. That's assuming he was a police officer, since I've seen some dispute the claim, but I think it makes sense. Did he quit after Hinako's death? Something happen before it? It's really peculiar, especially because we don't really get any reference to this in either half or Cat from what I can see.

(T1) Q16: Do you believe in past existences and fortune-telling?

K: I don't. I can't shift to them the responsibility of what happens in life.

Oh you mean like how Amane pretends her murder was ordained by God even though her cult would very clearly disavow her killing anyone or anything because of the whole "follow thine destiny" thing? Curious.

Alright now get ready for me to analyze literally every single Amane question out of principle.

(T1) Q1: Do you have any special skills?

A: Nothing that I can call a talent. Perhaps studying. I do well in my Japanese class.

Does murder count as a special skill? Because I think she's actually decently good at it. Her studiousness is obviously caused by the whole cult thing, but good on her for being good at Japanese! Couldn't be me.

(T1) Q2: Is there anyone you hold in high esteem?

A: My father. My father has been on a journey for a while, but that is something very honorable.

I've always wondered how the father thing plays into her story, there hasn't been too much reference to him yet. There is the second voice reveal trailer thing, but honestly I'm not too sure what to make of it honestly.

(T1) Q3: If you were allowed to do anything, what would you want to do?

A: Nothing really. I am not lacking anything.

Alright you lying liar.

(T1) Q17: What would you do if the world ends tomorrow?

A: If everything ends? Then, I might do all sorts of things I have never done before.

I fucking love characters who lie to themselves yes fucking inject that shit in my soul-

(T1) Q4: Do you think that your family is proud of you?

A: Of course. No daughter is as exemplary as I.

(T1) Q13: Who do you want to meet right now?

A: My father. I want him to praise me for working hard.

Her (allegedly) dead mother staring at her from hell like ಠ_ಠ

One day I'll make a post about how it's possible everyone in Milgram's just dead and Amane got killed by her father when he returned home and that's how she ended up in Milgram and I'll be sad.

(T1) Q5: When you go to an amusement park, what do you like to ride?

A: That is a place I should not go to.

I hate her cult so bad. I imagine that would be obvious, but I'll say it anyways.

(T1) Q6: What is the difference between an adult and a child?

A: There is no borderline there. I think there are grown-up children and childish grown-ups.

She had to grow up so fast I'm fucking depressed. Also ngl "childish grown-ups" is kinda based I think Amane should just insult people more often it's very awesome of her.

(T1) Q7: Do you like yourself?

A: I have never considered it from the perspective of love and hate, but I do think I am a good child.

Ouch. Ouchie ouch ouch.

(T1) Q8: Between ethics and emotion, which do you prioritize?

A: Both are trivial.

"Throw down, ethics is a delusion"~

This is honestly just a really funny answer. I get why she's saying it (common ethics and her own emotions are not as important as her cult's teachings in her eyes), but there's always a bit of hilarity that ensues when you say "ethics are trivial." Amane should honestly be allowed to violate Geneva conventions, I think the world would be better if she did.

(T1) Q9: Tell me what your family consists of.

A: It was my father, my mother, and I.

Was, huh. Wonder what happened there (murder happened there (allegedly)).

(T1) Q10: Is there any prisoner you're close with?

A: If I were to say, I guess it would be Yuno and Mahiru.

And then she wasn't! Kami-sama that first trial aftermath was a warzone.

(T1) Q11: What kind of meat do you like?

A: I don't eat meat.

The part of me that loves body horror sorta wants Amane to be shown eating her victim in Trial 3 to really drive home how 'this is not what the cult wants her to do'. Is that not a normal thing to say? It makes me sound completely fucking unhinged? Oops. Anyways.

(T1) Q12: What is the meaning of life?

A: I think it is something you learn for the first time when you look behind yourself when it ends. I do not want to have regrets then, so I live on with all my might.

Sometimes (a lot of the time) I think about Amane when she grows up and hopefully is out of her cult's control, and how she'll feel about the first 12 years of her life. I hope she and Shidou make up.

(T1) Q14: Do you listen to music?

A: Not really, to songs that are highly entertaining.

I headcanon that if the prisoner's listened to each other's songs, Backdraft would be Amane's favorite because it's exciting and she likes Fuuta.

(T1) Q15: When do you wake up/go to bed?

A: I go to sleep at 9PM, and wake up at 6AM.

She sleeps for nine hours a night? This is the healthiest sleep schedule I've ever seen in my entire life the fuck is this. I get this is because of the cult thing, so I think my girl should get to do a sleep-over with some of the other prisoners eventually, but still.

(T1) Q16: Do you believe in past existences and fortune-telling?

A: Although there are many fake ones.

How do you think Amane would react to Mikoto's tarot thing? I can't think of anything funny to say so I'm just not gonna address the question.

(T1) Q18: Do you regret your "murder"?

A: No. It was a natural obligation.

So true bestie, kill the bitch. I will live up to my name as the Local Amane Momose Apologist, I want her to kill everyone that's ever hurt her (not the audience obvs).

(T1) Q19: Do you want to be forgiven?

A: Of course. I anticipate that you will make the right judgment.

Come on, how can you disappoint her again? Vote her inno, she deserves it.

(T1) Q20: Any complaints about being imprisoned?

A: No. Because this is a trial by God.

Reason #543785478 why voting her inno is the better option: there is zero chance she sees a second Guilty as anything but another trial she must endure, so she'll only cling harder to her faith and I seriously worry we might not be able to get her back by the time Trial 3 rolls around.

Okay brainrot over. I'll be surprised if anyone survives that amount of insanity but here we are. Thanks for all the asks! And excited to see what you're cooking on your end. Take care!

#amane momose #kazui mukuhara

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itshouldvebeenmorax · 2 years ago

Text

“moraaaax!!! how are you today? what are you doing?~” venti yelled, approaching his friend.

“uh..i’m just training fighting, barbatos.” he answered, looking at venti.

“eh? still? tell me, is your fixed thought the fights and the wars? isn’t enough for you to be the strongest and powerful among the archons? he smiles amused

“no— it’s just…mind your own business.” morax said, making his spear disappear.

“morax…*sigh* you really need to relax, my friend” venti said, sounding worried.

“i don’t, i’m the geo archon and i always have to be on- a-ah! what are you..d-doing?! venti, stay s-still!” morax gasped, feeling venti’s hands on both of his sides, poking them lightly.

“oh my god, no way! the great and mighty geo archon is ticklish!” venti teased

“w-wha..w-what?! i’m not!! you..you just..pffffhahahah…what are you d-doing?! stop it—!”

“you laughed! hah! you are ticklish, i knew it.”

venti started to tickle him more.

“vehehenti n-no!! pffft..ahahah..hehehe~ morax let out a quite high-pitched giggle, and venti smiled really mischievously.

“what..what was that?~” he asked

“n-n-nohohothihing!! pffffttahahahahah…heh..s-stay still! barbatos! NO NO NO WAIT—“ morax stopped, blushing like crazy as he stared at where venti was putting his hands.

“venti, no. everywhere but there!—“

venti gave morax some squeezes to his thighs, and then scribbling his fingers under the back of thighs.

VENTI— A-AH- NO!! NO NO NO ST-STO-PP!! pfffffttahahahAHAHAH!! morax’s laughter was now sounding like one of a girl.

“what a interesting reaction! is this a particularly sensitive spot?~”

“thahahat’s not eheheheven the most tihihicklish oneeee!!” morax squirmed and laughed, while venti tickled his thigh mercilessly.

“oh, really? and where is your death spot then?”

“i’m nohohot thahat stupid. a-ah..ahahahaa…”

“alright then, i’ll find it by myself.”

venti poked him all over his ribcage, finding out that his hips were the most sensitive spot, as when he touches him, morax squirms and laughs harder and highter.

“hah hah…is your weak spot..right there?!” he grabbed morax’s sides, tickling hardly his hips.

“VENTI NO!! NOT THERE— D-DOHOHON’T!! AAAAAHHHH—!! pffffteheheheh~”

“i guess it definitely is~”

*after a while, venti stopped his tickling, letting morax catch his breath.*

“i won’t…forgive you..so easily..just know it, barbatos.”

“just admit that you had fun, in short, come on, i managed to make you less serious!” venti said proudly.

morax tries to stay serious and stoic but he burst out laughing, hearing venti saying that.

“well, i can’t say that i completely enjoyed that, but…yes, i guess you’re right…” morax said, after stopping giggling.

“i’m always right.” venti said, crossing his arms on his chest.

“now don’t exaggerate…”

#genshin impact #zhongli genshin impact #venti genshin impact #lee!zhongli #ler!venti #tickle fic

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thenewfuture · 2 years ago

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The True Mikan...

Back then....what happened to me....is straight up, UNforgivable...!

I was trying to change, I genuinely was! It was during that Despair Disease bullshit that I hid myself in one of the motel rooms, but I couldn’t tie my kimono properly. Sonia suggested I go to the music venue because it had a mirror there.

But that sealed my fate...! When I got there, she...

----------------------------------

*Flashback*

Tch...! Stupid kimono, can’t stay tied! Whoever designed these shits should be squeezed by one of these so hard until their eyes pop...!

Whatever... I’ll just use that mirror like Sonia said.

*creeeeaaak*

Okay... Now where is it-

AAAHH!?

!!!!

*Mikan is in the middle of tying the rope around Ibuki’s neck...!*

H-Huh...?! Wh...What the....?!

HEY! What are you doing?!

Hi-Hiyoko... !Y-You’re...!

Wh-Who is that?! A-Are you trying to commit a murder!?

I....*gasp, gasp, gasp*, I...!

You BITCH! YOU SCUM! I KNEW SOMEONE SO FAKE LIKE YOU WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS!!!

I, I-I, I...!

You dirtiest of the dirtiest, pig infested trash! I’ll tell everyone! I’ll tell everyone just how much of a fucking worthless maggot you really are!

Hnngghh, hnnngghhh...!

OH DON’T YOU START! You and I both know the you’re fake crying right now! That shit is not going to fly with me! You are so fucking screwed when I get the others!

Unnngghhhh.....!

WELL?! SAY SOMETHING, YOU SKANK!

Aaaagghh, aagghhh! Hnnngghh, wh-who....

....are you talking to...?

Huuuuuh?! Is your brain rotting already, you little pig-shit?! I’m obviously talking to-

Who are you talking to..?

HEY! Don’t you interuppt me you cow! I said I’m talking to-

Who.

THE FUCK.

Are you talking to like that?!

H-Huh...?!

I’m sowwwwwy! Is yo bwaaaaain rotting or something? Hmmmm?

I asked you clearly. Where do you get off, talking to someone like me like that?

H-Hey...! D-Don’t you-

You must be pretty ballsy talking to me like I am now. Always mocking me, bullying me, degrading me, even now. Why did I let you do to me for so, so long, I wonder?

Well no more. Do you hear me?!

NOOOO MOOOOOORRRRREEEEEE!!!!!!

Ah, ah!

*Hiyoko tries to run for the door, but-*

Mikan: No you don’t!

*Is quickly captured by Mikan and held in a seated full nelson position!*

HELP! HEEELLLPP! SOMEBODY SAVE MEEEEE!

It’s useless. Don’t bother. No one is coming to save a whiny crybaby like you.

Now I have you all to myself. Ahahahaha!~

*Shiing!* *Mikan brandishes a scalpel and directs it towards Hiyoko’s neck*

Hnngghh, ahhh, haaa...pl-please..don’t kill me...

Hmmm? Speak uuuuup. I can’t hear yoooouuu.

Pl-Pl-Please...! Don’t kill me, don’t kill me, don’t kill meeeeeee!

Stooooop? You want me to stop? Why would I do that? You never stopped when I asked you to. No one did. Why should I? What have you ever done for me?

Don’t kill me... Please, oh please, don’t kill meeeeeeheeheeee....

........

Say you’re sorry.

What?

You heard me. Apologize. Right now.

Y-You must be crazy if you think that I-

Ah, ah, aaaaaah. One wrong move, and my hand just might sliiiiip. And you wouldn’t want that, do you?

So, apologize. Get to it.

*hic*....*hic, hic,*....I.....I’m sorry...

Good, good girl~

Now what are you sorry for?

Huh?

You have to be specific! How else am I going to know what you’re apologizing for?

Oh, come onnnn!

*Shing!* *Mikan brings the scalpel closer to Hiyoko’s neck*

What are you sorry for?

I...I’m sorry....I-I’m sorry for bullying you so much...!

Good, good. Aaaand?

I’m sorry for calling you names like, trashy skank and pigshit.

And?

F-For writing all over you...

And?

F-For threatening to tie you up, a-and bopping you...

Aaaaaaand?!~

I’M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING! FOR CALLING YOU USELESS AND THAT I’M THE HELPLESS AND ANNOYING AND UGLY ONE!

Ahahahaa! HAHAHAHAHA! Yeeessssss!

I-I...I apologized... S-So please....l-let me go....d-don’t kill me...

Hmmmmm. You did apologize. Buuuuuuut, you never let me go when I did the same.

So fair’s fair that I only do the same to you.

BYE-BYE!

Hiyoko: WAIT, NO-!

*Shing!* *Splutter!*

----------------------------------------

All your deaths were quick....! She made mine long and tortuous, she made me relish in the fact that I was going to die!

I. CAN’T. EVER! Look past that. I WILL NEVER FORGIVE HER!

#danganronpa #super danganronpa 2 #danganronpa 3 #hiyoko saionji #mikan tsumiki #the new future #jabberwock island arc

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calpicowater · 2 years ago

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Week 14.4/52: April 3rd - April 9th 2023 | Lansdowne Carnival 🎪🎠🎟 🎡

Went to the Carnival with bf!! We wanted to go together last year but he was out of town until it ended :-( but we are making up for it a year later and so happy!! Finally wearing a new outfit for the first time in 4.5 weeks AHAHAHAA. Very exciting. The carnival was extremely crowded. Spent at least 3 hours just lining up tbh... line up to get tickets, line up for each and every ride. The only line ups that were fast were for food lol. We went on 3 rides: ferris wheel, carousel, and bumper cars. All very fun! And super long line ups too. Haven’t been here for 11-12 years so I was super excited about this day!!!! Also tried some carnival food from Steve-O’s: flaming hot cheeto chicken poutine & deep fried mars bar. Very yum!!!!!! :D

#365 #52 #ootd #27/52 outfits #brown baseball jacket #uniqlo white t shirt #levis wedgie straight #adidas stan smith #carnival #ferris wheel #carousel #sun emoji #yay!!!! ty for coming w me #i love doing new things w babesheheheheh

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eightmakesonebraincell-replies · 6 months ago

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DON'T MIND ME REPLYING LITERALLY A WEEK LATER 🙈🙉🙊 the maknae line tropes were some of my favourite to write (me saying that about all the tropes i write) but i think this was the start of my ✨calling✨ to write angsty endings hohohoho

NOT YOU CALLING ME OUT FOR STARTING WITH STRAIGHT SMUT HAHAHA DON'T EXPOSE ME 🫵🤫

but you're right i think hyung line had the same trajectory from smutty to fluffy oop

san

no hello's no how are you's only i want you's 😍🥵

whatever san wants he gets i'm all his haha ha ahahahaa haaaa

NO FR THOUGH SAN IS LITERALLY THE GREENEST GREEN FLAG TO GREEN FLAG EVER ???? istg there's no other way to depict him in my fics he is just green flag periodt

YOU 🤝 ME 🤝 NEEDING A SAN (or just the san) TO EAT OUR MUSHROOMS FOR US

ugh YES the desperation of yearning and longing for each other when they know they won't have a future together 😭 brb gotta go sob in my corner

until you bear the last name of somebody you will still be san's RAHHHH 👹👹👹

JAEHYUN MY MANN MY MANN MY MANNN AFJKDSGH I JUST NEED BOTH MY DIMPLE BOYS IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR

hehehehehehehehehe san was really like i 👏 can 👏 fulfil 👏 all 👏 them 👏 promises 👏

mingi

ahh yes onto mingi the start of my villain arc writing sad endings >:D

YOU'RE SO REAL FOR THAT mingi could literally brEaTHE in my direction and i'd be like 🫨🫨

i am such a sucker for power imbalances but them wanting to eradicate that imbalance uGH

mingi is just a baby boy cmere i'll sing you all the lullabies give you all the forehead kithes you need 🥹🫶

THOSE FOUR LINES ARE QUITE POSSIBLY MY FAVOURITE LINES FROM THIS AU

THE CONTRAST AND BOTH OF YOU WANTING TO LOVE EACH OTHER BUT KNOWING THAT IT'S NOT POSSIBLE IN THIS LIFETIME PLSSS

oooh yes :D things are looking too good :D how can i change things up hmm :D

HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOH 😈

EATING BRICKS IS LESS PAINFUL I AM HOWLING HAHAHAHA IF WE GONNA PUT IN ANGST WE GOTTA MAKE SURE IT ANGSTS WELL AMIRITE :D

it's okay i don't forgive myself either 🫵😭🫰

wooyoung

i love how we hit woo's au and it's just like yup okay what kinda lovely menace is he going to be this time what's the drill HAHAHA

advisor lee be thinking about retirement erry day 😮‍💨🤧

WE IN CAHOOTS INDEED OHOHOH 😏

no i actually love writing atz cameos bc their dynamics are already established and the comic relief they provide? absolute gold

HE JELLY JELLY HUEHUEHUE get yo gurl wooyoung

gotta show off to everybody you're his 🫱

LORD JUST GIVE US ONE CHANCE WITH POSSESSIVE WOOYOUNG WHO WANTS TO HOLD OUR WAIST TIGHT AND KISS US TO SHOW EVERYBODY WE'RE HIS PLS PLS PLS JUST ONE CHANCE PLEASE 🙏

I WOULD DIG MYSELF A HOLE AND NEVER UNEARTH MYSELF IF I WERE CAUGHT MAKING OUT

jongho

best source of comedy is the person lower on the power hierarchy to be absolutely real about the higher person's stupidity

who cares if you're the crown prince or the king you're straight up an idiot 🤨🫵

you're so real for wanting to be a sack of potatoes no thoughts head empty only being manhandled by choi jongho

RIGHT jongho make up your mind are you trying to bully reader or flirt with reader 😤 aND tAKE THE DAMN SPIDER WITH YOU

AHAHAHAH JONGHO'S AU WAS SO FUN TO WRITE SPECIFICALLY FOR ALL THE CRACK SCENES WITH THE SPIDERS

JONGHO STREAKING THROUGH THE CORRIDORS SCREAMING I BELIEVE THIS IS CANON 🤷‍♀️

Y E S i love you for noticing that he's teasing reader and pretending to be nonchalant wHILST LITERALLY BEING THE MOST LOVING unofficial-BOYFIE GIVING THEM THE BIGGER HALF AND WATER

KDJSGHSK I ALWAYS HAVE LIP BALM COME BACK HERE WITH YOUR CHAPPED LIPS CHOI JONGHO 😍

oh. I OVERUSE THIS SO MUCH FOR THAT LIGHTBULB MOMENT IN THEIR HEADS BUT I JUST LOVE IT SO MUCH HAHAH oh. 🫨

GET YOUR OWN LIPBALM AHAHAHHAHA that's true he should buy his own damn lipbalm with his bodyguard pay smh

ateez as royals who fall for you (maknae line)

read hyung line here

genre: royalty!ateez x fem!reader, fluff, angst, smut, crack, a brainrot and smutfest of royal tropes

length: 11.3k

c/w: very nsfw scenes - mdni, explicit language (dirty talk, swearing, insults), death, violence, blood & injuries, weapons, heavy & mature themes (sex work, murder, assassination, execution, mentions of misogyny)

a/n: as much as writing royals was tricky, it's kind of 🤢 sad 🤢 to see this au end. that being said nobody ask me for a pt 2 pls i need to recover from the trauma LMAOO and as always, huge thank you to the queen of royal au's herself @sorryimananti-romantic for helping me finish the fic and for teaching me how to make moodboards using something that is *not* word doc :')

san

pov: you're forbidden lovers

“shh,” san hushes you with a teasing curl of his fingers that are buried inside you. “wouldn’t want everyone outside to know what a dirty little slut the princess is, do you?”

his other hand covers your mouth, stifling the breathy moans and desperate whines that escape your lips as you sit in between his legs, naked and pressed back to lean against his chest

there is the sound of water splashing over the edge of the bathtub when san hooks his feet around your inner ankles so that he can spread your legs wider for him

he presses the palm of his hand harshly against your clit and your back arches with a muffled worship of his name

“or maybe you like that,” he teases “you like the idea of people knowing how good i make you feel with my fingers”

san removes his hand from your mouth and lowers it to pinch your nipple, smirking against your neck as you babble incoherently

he coos as he adds yet another finger into you, “imagine that, everyone knows you as the princess who loves being fucked dumb. and by one of her servants, no less”

all caution is thrown to wind and you drop your head back to lean against his shoulder, mouth lolling open with unrestrained pleads for more, more, faster as he angles his fingers to hit that sweet spot inside of you

“cum, princess” he demands

you grip bruises onto san’s thighs and arms when the pace of his fingers doesn’t relent even after your orgasm has washed over you

his arms tighten around you as his thighs flex to keep you still in his hold

you let out a choked sob from the overstimulation, teetering between pain and pleasure

“give me one more, i know you can do it,” he coaxes

the hand that has been fondling your breasts snakes down to rub your clit

with his fingers knuckle-deep inside of your pussy and his other hand playing relentlessly with your sensitive clit, the scale tips over and your vision blurs as another wave of pleasure hits you, more intense than the first one

“princess?” and then a knock. “are you okay?”

san slowly draws out the remainder of your orgasm with lazy thrusts of his finger into you

you just know he’s enjoying himself when you have to hide the shakiness in your voice to answer back to your maid outside, “everything’s fine. i’ll be done soon”

“soon?” san smirks, lifting you up by the waist to align your folds with his swollen cock. “then we better make this quick”

because you and san do not have the luxury of time, much less the luxury of love

he isn’t just another one of the numerous servants who serve you

he is everything to you despite how taboo it is for a princess and servant to love each other

his insignificance within the palace makes it much easier for him to slip away; for nobody to take notice

but at the same time, his insignificance is the whole reason why you two must be secretive in the first place

you make sure san has safely snuck out of the bathroom before you finally exit the bathtub and stand on unsteady legs

you allow your maids to come in and help you into the elaborate attire you are to wear for the afternoon

your parents have informed you that you are going to have visitors, thus requiring you to look your best

without much time left until the appointed meeting due to your…escapade, you make your way to the great hall, catching a glimpse of san’s dimpled smile from amongst the other body servants and waiting staff in the room

you have only just settled into your seat next to the king and queen when the guard outside the doors announces the arrival of your guests - the monarchs from the neodonian kingdom

schooling your expression to one of neutrality, you watch as they enter

and then you realise it isn’t just the neodonian king and queen who have come to visit

but the prince as well

he is undeniably handsome and pleasing to the eye with his sleekly gelled hair, chiseled features and tall, sturdy build

the young prince catches you looking at him and breaks out into a friendly smile and-

he has dimples too

the king garners everyone’s attention with a clear of his throat, before he welcomes the monarchs

prince jaehyun, you learn his name is

“after much discussion between ourselves and king jeong and queen jeong, we are pleased to announce our desire for closer relations between our kingdoms,” your father starts, booming voice resounding within the hall

you can’t stop yourself from looking over at him as he speaks with purpose, a strange niggling feeling starting to twist your stomach

the tight smile that your mother passes you from your father’s other side does little to settle your nerves

“as such,” the king continues, “we shall look forward to the engagement between my daughter and prince jaehyun”

there is a roaring sound in your ears, as if you have been pushed to stand under a raging waterfall

engagement

the engagement

you

prince jaehyun

the engagement between you and prince jaehyun

it takes everything in your body not to bolt up from your seat

your hands grip the armrests of your seat with a grasp so tight you are certain you will leave a permanent imprint of your agony

instead, you look around frantically for the one person your instincts are screaming for

where is san?

you are afraid to see how much this is going to hurt him

you are desperate to tell him that you had no idea about this

you are aching to press confessions of love and reassurance against his lips

but just like the insignificance of his status, san is nowhere to be seen

over the two years that you and san have been in your secret relationship, he has gained extensive knowledge of which particular tasks allow him a greater chance of seeing you, which corridors reach you the quickest, and which times during your schedule you have a break

never would you have thought he would use this knowledge to avoid you

it continues like that for the weeks following the announcement

you have no choice but to spend time with your future fiance when your father tells you very clearly to “ensure the prince feels at home”

prince jaehyun is warm and you find yourself getting along with him like you two are friends, but that is it - there are no sparks brighter than friendship

when you spend time with him, you cannot help but compare him to san; san would’ve said this, san would’ve done that, san, san, san

jaehyun engages you in conversation, easily filling in the gaps and lulls with little comments here and there, equipped with a charming laugh and deep dimples

but it only reminds you of san’s dimples and crescent eyes when you two would race through corridors, fingers tightly interwoven as you both run away to a secluded area with hushed giggles

jaehyun points out that neither of you like mushrooms during a dinner and helps nudge the servings on both of your plates to one side

the smile as you say “thank you” does not fully grace your lips because you think about san, who boasts that he will eat all the mushrooms in the world so that you never have to lay eyes on one ever again

jaehyun offers a soft yet sturdy hand to help you down the stairs or when he notices you are walking in heels across an uneven surface

your body recalls san’s rough, calloused hands that leave a trail of goosebumps wherever they touch your bare skin as he worships your body all night long

jaehyun is handsome and he is kind, but he is not san

the night before the king officially announces your engagement with prince jaehyun arrives

and still, you have not had a moment alone with san since he disappeared during that first announcement in the great hall

hurt and longing consume you to the very core

some days it is manageable, a concealed yet incessant thought, like a sticker stuck to the sole of your shoe

other days it wraps around your soul completely like a constrictor tightening as it slowly squeezes the life out of its prey

but you know that you cannot be selfish

what you feel, san feels with an intensity multiplied several times

after all, you are not the one who must stand in the shadows as the love of your life becomes engaged to somebody else, powerless to do anything but watch and poison your own smile with lies

you are lying on your bed when a quick, sharp knock sounds on your bedroom doors

you make no move to acknowledge your visitor, having told your maids very clearly you did not want to be disturbed tonight

your last night as yourself before you become prince jaehyun’s fiance

but then the knocks come a little more urgent, a little more frantic, just like your heartbeat does as it starts to speed up in anticipation

you hold your breath as you hurry to pull open the doors-

and there he is

“san-”

he swallows the rest of your words in a desperate kiss, his hands coming up to cradle your jaw as he walks you backwards so that he can step into your room

he tilts your head and slots his lips against yours again while he nudges your door closed with his foot

it isn’t until you let out a whine as his tongue swipes over your bottom lip that he pulls back to finally look at you, both of his thumbs caressing your cheekbones

you grip the front of his linen shirt, afraid that he will disappear as soon as you let go

“san, i- i had no idea, i didn’t agree to any of this”

he shushes you gently, a painful smile adorning his handsome face

“i know. i know, so please don’t cry, love,” he murmurs softly

you don’t even realise the weeks of suppressed emotions have started making their way down your face in salty trails until san uses the back of his fingers to tenderly brush them away

“i’m getting engaged tomorrow, san,” your voice breaks as reality settles in

you are so afraid

you are so lost

above all, you are so in love with san

“i know,” he reassures again, “but until tomorrow, you are still mine”

and so you spend your last night together

time has always been precious; conversations, kisses and touches rushed and with fervour

but tonight, san takes his time with you

he lays on your bed with you cradled on top of him, limbs tangled together as he savours the taste of your lips against his

he turns you onto your back as he slowly undresses you, leaving tattoos of his love each time he bares another part of your body

he pleasures you with his fingers whilst whispering into your ears, creating a harmony with his praises and the melodious moans that leave your lips

and as he brings you both to your highs numerous times throughout the night like an ingrained dance routine, it is accompanied with confessions of i love you

san holds you against his chest under your blankets so tightly that you cannot tell where your body ends and his body starts

before you drift off, safe and protected in his arms, he murmurs against your temple, “no matter what happens tomorrow, no matter what happens in the future, my heart will always be yours”

“as will mine”

you wake up the next morning to an empty bed and an equally empty heart

restless and drowning in a mix of emotions, you pace the empty corridors of the guest bedchambers

which is where jaehyun finds you as he exits his room

he is surprised but is quick to greet you kindly, “good morning, princess. what are you doing here?”

you pause mid-step

what are you doing?

“prince jaehyun,” you let the words come out of you before you can regret them. “can we talk for a moment?”

he nods, entering his room again as he pulls the door open wider for you to follow

jaehyun closes the door and then offers you a seat on his sofa, before pulling up his own chair and settling a respectful distance away from you

“i hope you don’t feel uncomfortable in my room,” he explains, “i thought that we would be less likely to be disturbed in here…considering most people know of our engagement today”

“actually, i wanted to talk to you about that”

“go on,” he encourages you with a dimpled smile

you take a deep breath

“i’m sorry,” you blurt out

and then you are admitting to the prince that he is lovely and charming and caring, but you just don’t see it working out with him

you don’t want to get engaged with him

because your heart already belongs to somebody else

“good”

“i’m so sorry, i should have been honest with you from the start but- wait, what?” you look up from where you have been nervously picking at your cuticles

jaehyun is smiling at you - a genuine smile that you did not know he had

“i’m actually relieved to hear that, princess,” he admits. “because i…also have someone that i love back home”

and for the first time, you and jaehyun truly see each other in the same light

“who is it?” he asks

“his name is san,” and then you add on, “he has dimples just like you do”

you ask him the same question

you see the way jaehyun’s expression softens with love from just the mere thought of the other

it makes you wonder whether you have the same look on your face when you mention san

jaehyun jokes, “want to be the one who tells your father we’re calling off the engagement? i don’t fancy getting executed today”

but despite what he says, mere hours later, when you are both standing in the great hall before your parents - the kings and queens of both your kingdoms - he is the one to speak up

“your majesty, we have decided to part ways peacefully and would not like to proceed with the engagement. our kingdom will always be your ally, regardless of marital relations or not”

“what?” you see veins starting to appear across the king’s forehead as he tries to maintain his temper, but the queen and the jeong monarchs seem to be taking the news much better

disappointed, perhaps, but understanding

the queen leans closer to remind the king that they had all agreed to this engagement on the terms that the decision would ultimately be yours and jaehyun’s

you suddenly speak up because this may be the only time you have the courage to

“i have one more thing to say,” you declare. “i revoke my noble status and thus declare nullified all the privileges, rules and traditions that come with nobility. i have someone i love and i wish to marry them as myself, not as the kingdom’s princess”

the king roars furiously, “that is enough! leave!” and he slams his hand against the throne’s armrest

shocked and betrayed by your father’s reaction, you rush out of the great hall with tears welling in your eyes

only to run straight into the waiting arms of san

“oh, princess,” he murmurs against the crown of your head as he engulfs you in his embrace

he doesn’t have to say anything for you to realise that he has heard the whole conversation

but you do not care about anything anymore

you are where you want to be, held by who you want to be with

“how are you here?” you sniffle

“jaehyun approached me earlier. i thought i was going to get beat up,” san’s attempt to make you smile is successful

when you lift your head up to look at him, you realise his eyes are wet as well

then you feel his body stiffen as his eyes shift to focus on something behind you

someone

he immediately steps away from you, bowing deeply as he greets the queen

you turn around to see her face adorning an endearing smile

“it’s fine, sannie,” she says, and you are not sure whether you and san are more surprised by the fact that she knows him by name or by the affectionate nickname she has used

“i’ll, uh, leave you two to talk,” he flusters

she thanks him with a teasing remark, “i won’t keep her away from you for very long”

san waits further down the corridor, back turned to give you two a moment of privacy

and then she is stroking your hair affectionately

“i am so proud of you. you’ve grown up so well and you are so brave,” she says

you don’t understand

you ask, “why aren’t you angry?”

“oh, baby,” she fondly runs her fingers through your hair, just like she used to when you were younger. “before my duties as the queen to my people, i am the mother to my daughter. i love you and all i want is for you to be happy”

your lips tremble with emotion as your mother pulls you into a hug

“does sannie make you happy, dear?”

you nod, “the happiest”

“then that is all i want. now go,” she takes a hold of your shoulders and gently turns you in the direction of san. “i’ll talk to your father”

with one last encouraging squeeze, you race down the corridor towards san

he hears your footsteps and has already turned around with open arms waiting to catch you

you hear him let out an oomph! with how hard you throw yourself into him, but he is then swaying your bodies side to side

san pulls back slightly with an incredulous look. “does this mean we can be together? together together?”

“i goddamn hope so because i gave up my princess privileges for you. no more carriages, no more assorted sweet delicacies, no more daily massages-” you fold down your fingers as you continue listing things off

he cuts you off with a tickle to your sides as he says, “that’s easy to sort out”

“first, you’ll still be my princess,” he unfurls one of your fingers so it stands upright again

“second, i’ll carry you myself so that you never need to use your feet again,” he unfurls another finger

“i’ll give you a treat whenever you want,” he kisses your lips, nibbling on your bottom lip with a teasing tug

“and, dear princess,” he pulls you flush against his body and you have to steady yourself on his chest to avoid tripping over, “i can give you hourly massages…”

smirking, he starts to lower his head to suck pretty marks onto your neck as he whispers in a low voice, “...if you can keep up”

mingi

pov: you're the prince's maid

for what you are about to do, you could very well be executed should somebody catch you

but desperate times call for desperate measures

and there’s no guarantee that you and all the other staff will not be executed anyway…

not with what has just happened in the palace

you push the door closed behind you with a soft click, using the brief changeover of guards to slip inside the bedroom of the youngest prince, unnoticed

you call out softly but urgently, “prince mingi”

when you hear him groggily murmur, starting to bubble towards the surface of consciousness, you dare to give his shoulder a rough shake

“prince mingi, please wake up”

his eyes flutter open, confusion starting to clear the fogginess in his head as he struggles to comprehend the sight of your face hovering inches from his, deep into the hours of the night

“w-what’s going on?” he clears his husky voice, “are you okay?”

you wish you could reach out and smooth the wrinkles of concern from his forehead

reassure him that everything will be okay until he falls back asleep

but there is no time

“the crown prince is dead and we must leave. now.”

the effect is immediate, like you have just driven a knife into his chest

although you suppose it must not feel very different for prince mingi right now

“the crown prince is d-” the word tastes vile on his tongue, so he asks after his second oldest brother instead. “what about prince eun?”

you must drive the knife into him once more

“he was the one who murdered the crown prince, but he has framed you for the murder. there is no time, prince mingi, we must leave now”

“the court will find me innocent,” yet he lets you tug him out of his bed

you hastily help prince mingi into a dark brown robe while you shake your head, “not when your inscribed sword is currently covered in the crown prince’s blood. we do not know who is secretly working for prince eun. until we know for sure, we do not stand a chance of clearing your name”

he knows that you’re right, even if his heart is hoping that you are wrong

the prince slides his hand into the gap between his bed and wall, pulling out a spare sword and wrapping the belt around his waist

eyes sweeping across his chamber one final time, he locks eyes with you grimly before turning to flee

you follow the prince through a back passageway - it’s not entirely a secret and it won’t be long before the royal guards come for the prince, discover his empty bedroom and give chase

but it is long enough to give you two a head start

he helps you up onto the back of his personal horse before he swings himself up easily onto the saddle behind you

with a nudge of his feet, the prince sends the horse into a gallop

you startle with a yelp, having never ridden a horse before, much less one at this pace

prince mingi presses himself a little closer to you and slots his chest against your back as he leans forward to guide your hands to hold the reins with his

“here,” he murmurs, “just follow me”

he shifts one hand to settle on your waist, guiding your body into a comfortable rhythm that dances in sync with the horse’s movements and his own

when he’s sure you’ve gotten the hang of it, the prince places his hand back on the reins, yet he stays close, keeping you safely encased within his arms to prevent you from falling off

you’re not sure how long you two ride for

but at some point the prince slows the horse to a canter

with the slower sway of the steed, the steady clack of hooves against the forest floor, and the warmth of the prince around you, you drift off to his whispered, “sleep, i’ve got you”

you wake up to find yourself on a scratchy pile of leaves

the events of last night piece themselves together when you spot prince mingi, still adorning his deep blue silk pajamas, leaning against a tree a few feet away

it would have been a sight to see if not for the fact that-

“what are we going to do now?” you sit up, and the prince’s robe, you now register, falls from around your body

the prince gives you a warm smile as you rub the sleep from your eyes with fisted hands

“we’ll head into halsburg. the town is small enough the news should not have traveled that far yet. we’ll replenish some supplies and go from there”

it’s unspoken

the fact that there is no solid plan from there

even if the two of you have managed to escape the royal guards, for how long can you two run?

plus, it will be impossibly difficult to find evidence while on the run, when the answers are within the castle walls themselves

but you push those thoughts aside as you two enter halsburg, the prince’s hood pulled up over his face

you do the bulk of the purchases, less likely to be recognised by the townspeople

it’s mainly food and water for yourself, the prince, and his horse, and a simple tunic to replace his royal pajamas - something you have been teasing him about since you woke up

later that night, hours away from the outskirts of halsburg, you two settle for a couple hours of rest

a small fire crackles away to the song of the cicadas, an occasional pop as the licks of flames cast shadows across your faces

you glance at the prince sitting across from you, who is idly fiddling with his pajama top

specifically, the royal crest of the song family embroidered onto its front pocket

your heart clenches painfully, knowing the death of a family member is hard enough to process without the additional weight of being framed for murder, much less by your own brother who is the real culprit

“prince mingi…” you start, voice low

he glances up at you, eyes softening as he curves his lips up into a small smile, “i’m okay.”

you hesitate for a split second before letting the clench in your gut pull you to your feet, and you shuffle to settle back down in front of the fire, except this time beside the prince

all the while his eyes never leave you, not even when you nudge his shoulder softly and say,

“you don’t have to be strong. not in front of me…”

and he knows

because despite the differences in your social statuses, you are the person he trusts the most

you, the girl who used to trip over the lengths of his robes that you carried, now a woman who holds herself righteously and bravely

you, who chose to risk your own life from the moment you woke him up in his chambers

you, who is still risking your life to flee with him

“only if you stop calling me prince,” he jokingly nudges you back, attempting to make the atmosphere lighter despite the wetness that is starting to paint his eyes. “with you, i am just mingi”

“okay, prince mingi,” you tease

yet, you still extend a hand out to him, palm upturned in a silent invitation for comfort should he wish to seek it, because you can tell that he isn’t quite ready to seek it verbally

mingi laces his larger fingers through yours, tucking your interlocked hands closer to his body as he draws his knees up so that he can rest his chin upon them

mingi thinks that he feels numb more than anything, but he finds he isn’t as surprised as one would expect him to be

perhaps he always knew of his middle brother’s thirst for the throne

he just never thought it would be enough to spill blood

for now though, he lets himself be distracted by your thumb tracing mindless patterns against his knuckles

he lets himself relish in the heat radiating from your side that seems to warm him from inside out, even as the embers of the fire slowly lose their glow and die out with the darkening night

the days start to repeat themselves

you two cover as much distance as you can while sparing what time you can afford for yourselves and mingi’s horse to rest

mingi has decided to travel to prince yunho's kingdom, an old and trusted ally who may be able to provide you two with protection while he pulls strings to fight back against prince eun

from his calculations, the journey will take at least another two weeks

and although mingi doesn’t tell you this, deep down he does not know whether you two have two weeks left

the threat of the royal guards catching up hangs over the two of you like a hangman’s noose

neither of you have brought up that night by the fire either

but something has definitely changed in the way you seek comfort and reassurance in each other

as if so long as you have each other, everything will be alright in the end

when you feel him tremble as he sleeps curled around you, restless from a plaguing nightmare, you hush sweet nothings and brush his locks away from his forehead until his breathing steadies out again

and when you’re seated on the saddle in front of him, you now having long grown accustomed to horse riding, he still finds himself resting a comforting hand on you somewhere - your hips, thigh or over your own hand

sometimes when he is laughing softly with you, your arms brushing against each other, you imagine a different story; one where you are worthy of loving him

sometimes when you are tucked into his chest, small exhales escaping your open lips as you sleep, mingi imagines a different story; one where he is able to love you freely

because despite the blood running through his veins that has ultimately led to his downfall, you still look at him as though he has placed the stars in the very sky that you two have spent countless nights under

and although he knows the reality is that he cannot, he tries to write his own story, even if just for tonight

you are lying in his arms, legs tangled together, when the question comes tumbling out of his lips

“will you stay with me, forever?”

he feels you still in his embrace, before you’re pulling back a little to look at him with a chuckle

“you should be asking a princess that, prince mingi, not somebody like me”

“you are a princess in my eyes”

you can’t help the endearing look that crosses over your face as you lightly tap his nose, “you know that is not how it works”

“then we can run away. for i am already as good as dead to my kingdom,” he tells you with boyish determination

“you cannot, mingi. your people need a good prince”

“but what prince would i be if i cannot even boldly love you? the person who is dearest to me?”

under his sincere gaze and the weight of his words, you allow him this moment of solace

because perhaps, you want it just as much as he does

“okay, i’ll be your princess,” you breathe out

“forever?”

“forever”

that night, it is just you and mingi - no titles that separate your world from his, no looming threat of death - just two people in love

even as an uneasy pit settles at the bottom of mingi’s stomach, a growing feeling that gnaws away at him into the early hours of the next morning

he is startled awake, your expression frightened, and he immediately understands when he hears the thunderous chorus of hooves hitting the ground towards you two

mingi had known there was not much time left, but he did not think that the inevitable confrontation would happen this soon, only mere hours after the soft kiss he had pressed against your forehead

the desperate attempt to escape once more is futile, the royal guards closing the distance within minutes

left with no choice but to stop, you and mingi demount and the guards move to flank you both in a wide semicircle

when the head of the guards, prince eun, saunters forward, mingi matches with a stride of his own so that he can step in front of you

“you killed the crown prince, eun,” mingi spits at his brother

“running and denying your actions up until your very last moments, i see,” prince eun laughs condescendingly. “and you even took a little dog with you, too”

mingi presses you closer to his back, hiding you from the leering gaze of his brother

prince eun smiles smugly at mingi’s reaction, before he takes out a scroll and unravels it

“for high treason of the assassination of the crown prince, the king hereby decrees the immediate revocation of nobility of his third son, song mingi, and for the execution of song mingi and his maid upon sighting.”

you press your nose into mingi’s back, taking one last inhale of his familiar scent

the bowmen all take aim as prince eun sneers, “any last words, brother?”

mingi turns around, and all you can see in that moment are his warm eyes and dimpled cheeks

“i love you, my princess,” he proclaims

“forever,” you reply

he brings his lips down to connect them with yours, drowning out the distinct vibration of loosening strings and the hiss of flying arrows with the roaring symphony in your hearts

you’re unsure what pain swallows you whole first - the pain as an arrowhead sinks into your chest, or the pain as you realise that this is the end of your short-lived love with mingi

you struggle to keep the smile on your face as you lock eyes with mingi, trying to memorise the loving gaze that adorns his own face

you see his mouth moving, but the pain exploding throughout your body is too loud for you to make out his words

with your last breath, you gasp out your final confession, “i love you too, mingi. we’ll meet again in the next life”

as the world starts to fade away, cold creeping into your limbs, you hope that in another story, in another lifetime, you and mingi will be able to find each other again

wooyoung

pov: you're the princess of a rival kingdom

“absolutely not, advisor lee,” your mother raises her nose in the air

“your highness, i understand but-”

“oh please, do not flatter yourself, queen cho,” queen jung spits out, “you are not the only one who abhors the idea”

you glare at the prince sitting across from you, your own gazes reflecting the tension in the room

advisor lee has suggested that your family and the jung family host a joint royal ball as a grand display of amity between the two neighbouring kingdoms, particularly between the princess - yourself - and their prince - prince wooyoung

there have been spreading rumours in town of the strained relationship between the two royal families

which aren’t entirely untrue

as a child, the two kingdoms have been loyal and steadfast in their alliance and friendship

in fact, it is not uncommon to find you joining prince wooyoung in his kitchen, begging the chefs to let you two lick the spoons

or to find prince wooyoung squatting next to you in your garden as you both look at the ladybugs

but as power imbalances emerge and political agendas start to diverge, a wedge is driven between your families

the relation is now dangerously close to severing completely, but not without the increasing attention of the towns surrounding the two kingdoms

and one of the last things both royal families need is unease and disunity amongst the commoners

which brings advisor lee to look on with exasperation as he tries to do his job - advise

except neither your mother nor queen jung look ready to accept his advice

your father nods slightly at the two of you, “you are dismissed, as are you, prince wooyoung”

you curtsy as the prince takes a slight bow, before you obnoxiously flick your hair over your shoulder and turn away on your heels

you escape to the garden, knowing that the meeting will take at least another hour before you are required to bid the jung family farewell

except, surprise surprise

who do you run into

you narrow your eyes at prince wooyoung as he steps towards you, who has one eyebrow quirked, “a royal ball, he says?”

“absolutely not,” you fold your arms across your chest

“oh please, do not flatter yourself, princess,” he sneers, not dissimilar to the nasally tone his mother had voiced her dissatisfaction earlier with

neither of you back down, daring the other to say something else

before you two break out into giggles, eyes glittering scandalously

“did you see your mother deliberately pass the salt instead of sugar for the tea?”

“and then the face my mother made when she took a sip of it-”

he pulls you to crouch behind an azalea bush as you both chortle like children, out of sight, before he brings you in for a dizzying kiss

you sigh, resting a hand on his chest

“do you also abhor the idea of dancing with me, prince wooyoung?” a teasing lilt in your voice

“absolutely,” he nods grimly, “why go to all that effort when there is a much grander and longer-lasting solution?”

“and what is that, my prince?”

he sneaks another chaste kiss from your lips, “for me to take your hand in marriage, my princess”

at his words, your smile dampens

“you know that i would say yes in a heartbeat. it is not i who needs convincing, but our parents”

because despite the growing hostility between your two families, the relationship you share with wooyoung has, ironically, blossomed into one of well-concealed adoration, intimacy and love

you two have come to learn that that one slightly lighter stone on the western side of your kingdom’s outer walls comes loose, and is the perfect size for slipping a piece of paper behind it

you two have also come to learn that every fourth week, if you ask your personal tutor enough questions about the plants laid out on the store’s table in front of you during your scheduled lesson in town, you’ll be able to drag it out long enough for you both to just catch a glimpse of each other as he and his escorts cut through the town on their way back to his kingdom

and of course, you two have come to learn the most isolated spots in your own respective kingdoms, like the second stairwell leading down to the cellar in wooyoung’s palace

and amongst the azalea bushes in the back garden in yours

which is exactly how you knew that he would appear, how you knew that he would give you those sweet kisses you have been craving so desperately

as wooyoung cups your jaw to kiss you once more, one that leaves you wanting to chase his lips forever, he bets you that it’ll only take two weeks of close-quarter meetings between your royal families before one of your mothers blow up and the ball idea falls through completely

in response, you bet him that they won’t even last two weeks - one at the most

except you’re both wrong

the meeting turns into two, followed by several more as the planning goes ahead

sometimes, the meetings are held in the jung palace

other times, their family journeys to your kingdom instead

one thing that stays constant is the malevolence in the air

the parents are sarcastic snipes and saccharine smiles

and on the surface, you and wooyoung are further extensions of your own parents’ simmering loathing for the other

but under the intricately-carved wooden table, you two are playing footsies, jeweled heels and leather shoes engaged in a playful fight

you see how many times you can slide your heels up along his shin, gradually inching closer towards his inner thigh with each coquettish touch

he has you pass him anything and everything under the guise of forgoing the help of the numerous royal butlers and maids around the room to deliberately irritate you

really, it is to accidentally brush his fingers over your hands; to see the pretty shade of rose that settles over your cheeks and ears as you both try not to break out into giggles

and perhaps, during the meals that may take place during the meetings, there have been a couple of peas flicked at each other here and there when no one is paying attention

(unbeknownst to you two, the maids and butlers alike must hide their own endearing smiles)

the weeks turn into months and you practically have a permanent glow radiating from you, now that you have been seeing the prince so frequently

(which also does not go unnoticed)

as you select a necklace from the assortment of choices to emphasise the plunging neckline of your off-shoulder gown, you wonder how the day of the royal ball has arrived so quickly

your personal maid, jihye, carefully fixes the clasp of the necklace around you before stepping back to let you look in the mirror

you smooth a hand over the soft lavender charmeuse of your dress, nervously looking at jihye

“how do i look?”

“stunning, my princess,” she assures you, before adding, “prince wooyoung will definitely love it”

“prin- he- what? i- sorry?” you say unintelligibly, before you try to salvage the situation by tucking a lock of hair behind your ear as you laugh her off

but jihye just looks at you knowingly

meanwhile, prince wooyoung is already at the grand hall, the jung family having arrived two days prior for the final preparations of the ball

he and his friends, princes from kingdoms located further up north and towards the east, are lingering around one of the tables decorated with flower arrangements and elaborate candle holders, ignoring the longing glances of other attendees, women and men alike, thrown at their striking posse

wooyoung is trying to keep his gaze subtle, scanning the vast number of people at the ball without craning or turning his head, searching for one particular face

yours

prince yeosang nudges the others, jerking his chin to motion towards the distracted wooyoung

when wooyoung finally realises he isn’t as subtle as he thinks, all his friends are already looking at him with varying degrees of smirks

“just know that if there were not so many people here,” wooyoung begins with a pleasant smile, “i would flip you all off right now”

before he can try stepping on his friends’ toes in the form of petty revenge, prince seonghwa points towards the entrance as his smile grows impossibly wider

“look”

wooyoung turns around

and like any typical man who is head over heels in love, the world around him slows down

the gushing whispers spreading throughout the ballroom fade into the background

because finally, there you are, gracefully stepping past the threshold of the arched doorway in all your alluring beauty, accentuated by the way your curled locks and flowing gown frame your body

for the briefest moment, you lock eyes with him, and wooyoung feels his brain shutting down on him

“you’re going to catch a fly in your mouth, woo”

“pick up your jaw. it’s on the ground”

prince yunho pretends to dab wooyoung’s mouth with the ruffled sleeves of his cream shirt, “you’re drooling, darling”

at that, wooyoung smacks his lips dazedly before coming to a moment of realisation, blinking hard twice to bring himself back to reality

“god, you’re hopeless. just go up and talk to her,” prince hongjoong snickers. “the whole point of this ball is to show off how ‘close’ your families are anyway”

wooyoung grumbles that he knows, he’s just looking for the right timing

which, unfortunately, does not seem to come

you spend what feels like the next two hours being whisked around, feigning polite interest as you are forced to engage in dull and bland conversations with numerous men of differing royal statuses, all of whom are no doubt trying to make an impression on you in hopes of becoming a potential suitor in the future

not that you have eyes for anyone apart from the one who already has your heart

the very same person who is currently fed up with watching you converse and let your hands be kissed by men who are not him

even if he knows you are pretending, he thinks that you sure are damn good at giggling at all the right times

you are trying not to let your smile turn into a grimace as the older-aged man, lord ryu you think, boasts of his wealth to you, when wooyoung enters your peripheral vision

“princess, lord ryu,” he greets you both, before looking down at the latter, “pardon me as i take the princess for a dance”

lord ryu, visibly irked but unable to say anything to the prince of significantly higher status, lets go of your hand to step back into a bow, “of course, prince wooyoung”

you giggle, this time genuinely, as wooyoung takes your hand to gently lead you towards the center of the ballroom, where several others are starting to waltz to the soft music that is now playing

you rest a hand just below his shoulder, feeling the sturdiness of his muscles flexing beneath his shirt, as he places his other hand to settle on the dip of your waist

a little possessively, you might add

“you look beautiful today,” he murmurs lowly, away from any prying ears

“only today?” you quirk an eyebrow teasingly

his voice drops down an octave, “well it’s not every day that i can tell you, princess”

wooyoung’s eyes flicker down hungrily to look at your lips

you run your tongue slowly over your bottom lip, knowing it will drive him absolutely crazy that he cannot just take you right there and then in front of everybody

and you can see the moment his resolve snaps

“meet me for some fresh air in ten,” bringing his lips as close to the shell of your ear as he dares

and then he’s gone

you become progressively antsy as you wait out a generous amount of time after he leaves for you to also slip away from the ballroom

wooyoung pins you against a pillar as soon as you emerge in the garden, aching to kiss you and fight for dominance until you’re both breathless and light-headed

“you don’t know how desperately i wanted to kiss you in front of everyone - let the whole world know that you’re mine,” he nips at your bottom lip

you rest your hands on his chest, fingers curled around the pleated front of his satin shirt to hold yourself steady as he turns your lips into an artwork of swollen cherry reds

he tilts your head back a little more, your mouths moving in tandem, soft moans drawn out of you, when-

“what in god’s name is going on?”

you and wooyoung startle apart at the shriek

the blush dusting your faces pale almost immediately at the sight of not just your mother, but also queen jung and a few of the royal staff

it’s kind of amusing that of all things for the two queens to have the same mindset about, it is the discovery of you and wooyoung’s secret relationship that unites them, both sharing twin expressions of horror and revulsion

you’re ripped from each other’s arms as you are forced back into the confines of your bed chamber, royal ball long forgotten

your only solace is learned later that night, when jihye brings a trolley of food you have no appetite for, that the jung family have not yet returned to their kingdom

they are still in your palace somewhere

yet that does little to soothe your tears, overwhelmed by the drastic turn of events, and you do not know when you fall asleep that night

all you know is that it is to a bed too cold and a longing in your heart too gaping to ignore

“princess,” you look up to see jihye standing at your door the next morning, almost apologetic, “the king and queen request for your presence in the throne room”

as you approach the room after tidying your appearance, your breath hitches when you spot him just by the double doors

you barrel forwards into his waiting arms, uncaring of the staff following behind you

not that they have the heart to stop you either way

“i thought you would have been forced to leave,” you blurt, unable to believe that wooyoung is right in front of you

“i’m still here,” he chuckles. “i have been summoned by your parents”

your heart drops down to your stomach at his words as you realise what this meeting is about

“and i am glad they did, princess,” wooyoung is quick to interject before your apology makes it past the tip of your tongue. “i am going to ask for your hand in marriage. officially”

“what if they banish us from ever seeing each other again?” worry overwhelms you as your breathing quickens

wooyoung gently laces his fingers through yours, bringing up his other hand to cup your face and run his thumb comfortingly over the curve of your cheekbone to keep you grounded

“no matter what happens today, no matter what the outcome is,” he looks at you with the fierce determination of a man ready to give up anything and everything for your sake, “i will never ever stop fighting for you”

he presses his soft lips against yours

“for us,” he vows

your breathing evens out, and while your heartbeat still pounds inside your ribcage, you know that it marches in rhythm with the man in front of you

this time, not afraid to appear in front of the rulers of your kingdoms - your parents - you and wooyoung nod in reassurance at each other once more, hand in hand, before you both push the doors to the throne room open

together.

jongho

pov: you're under his protection as your royal guard

over the din of volunteered names in the meeting room, jongho steps forward

“your majesty, i will accompany the princess,” he declares

“choi jongho?” your father scans him up and down with regard before nodding in approval, “it is decided then”

“him? surely i need another person with me as well?” you protest

your father quirks an eyebrow at you, a subtle reminder that whilst he is your father, he is also the king

“no, you will need to travel in disguise and stay as discreet as possible. only jongho will accompany you as your royal guard”

your father looks away and starts to address the next item on the meeting agenda; it is quite clear there is no room for argument

meanwhile, jongho sidles up to you

“you trying to catch bugs or something? close your mouth, princess,” he teases under his breath

you nudge him with an elbow, “you’re the only bug i see around here”

he rolls his eyes but you both snicker in unison when one of your older sisters turns around to shush you with a dirty look

regardless, you stay silent for the rest of the meeting

you’re not sure why jongho stepped forward to take on this task

because for someone who is your main royal guard and is supposed to be loyal and obedient, he sure makes it clear that his job is about as gratifying as babysitting

(“you can’t talk to me like that. i’m the princess”)

(“no, you’re not. you’re an idiot”)

in fact, when you had been notified a few days prior that you would be traveling with one other royal guard - who had yet to be decided at the time - jongho had spent every single day gloating that he would finally get a break from babysitting you

and yet here he is

with the opportunity to hand you off to somebody else

but instead, baring his teeth at the other guards who offer themselves up for this scouting mission

he would never admit to it either, but jongho personally spoke to the king years ago about being rostered on as your main bodyguard since he’s “known the princess for the longest and so i can protect her the best”

you don’t want to travel to the border

you’re in charge of maintaining security and defense along your borders and with neighbouring kingdoms, usually dealing with complications remotely through the ministers and advisors who work for you

this time though, there has been recent unrest near the southern borders of your kingdom near denport, a city notorious for bandits and fugitives

the situation has worsened with increased risk of bloodshed, thus has the need for you to survey the borders in person

and as the youngest sibling of five, the king has made it very clear that this is your opportunity to prove your capabilities

jongho makes sure to remind you of this fact when you grumble your way through packing a satchel of essential items to take with you

(“your fluffy slippers are not essential, princess”)

(you listen and throw them back onto the floor of your bedchambers, but stuff in a few paperweights when he isn’t looking out of petty revenge because you know he’ll end up carrying your bag for you later when you ask him to)

it’s a relatively long journey to denport, so as soon as you are ready, jongho having long finished packing his own bag, you leave your kingdom with him at your side

by the time the sun is starting to set later that day, you’re passing through a small town

he suggests calling it a night and recuperating at one of the inns

you wait while he inquires about available rooms and then follow him through a small alleyway to the inn that he has chosen for the night

you take all but one look at the rotting wood and creaking sign at the entrance before you are crossing your arms like a petulant child

“there’s no way i’m staying the night in this sorry excuse of an inn”

he merely blinks

“you’re technically not the princess right now so you better listen to me or god help me, i’ll-”

“you’ll what,” you challenge, nose-to-nose

or nose-to-throat, you suppose

but before you can dwell any further on your height difference, jongho picks you up, slings you over his shoulder like you are nothing more than a sack of potatoes, and walks into the inn without a care in the world that you are screaming bloody murder

you resign to your fate and flop uselessly against his back as he carries you up the stairs

instead, when he throws you onto the bed upon entering the room, you look up at him sultrily and smirk, “ooh, now i’m turned on”

jongho shakes his head with exasperation but you don’t miss the redness that is creeping up the back of his neck as he turns around to close the door shut

“wait,” you sit up on the bed, “we’re sharing a room?”

“it’s safer. i’ll sleep on the sofa”

you scrunch your nose at the arrangement, but you do admittedly feel a little more at ease in the unfamiliar room of the inn

you start to take a shoe off before a thought flits through your mind and you point the shoe in your hand at him like a weapon, “you better not snore”

jongho rolls his eyes as he steps forward to take the shoe out of your hand, and then he is bending down to help slip off the shoe from your other foot

a thank you lies on the tip of your tongue

“you’re the only snorer in this room, princess”

nevermind.

it’s gone.

you’re settled in bed, waiting for jongho to finish washing up and turn off the lights, when you spot it

holy shit

your immediate reaction is to seek his protection

“jongho!”

the door to the bathroom swings open almost immediately as he rushes out, eyes alarmed, alert, and zeroing onto you

water drips off the ends of his hair and you can still spot suds on his exposed torso

“what’s wrong? are you okay? are you hurt?” his voice is laced with restrained panic

you point to the corner of the room and then he sees it too

his body stiffens completely

because, mere metres from the two of you, presence sinister and dangerous…

is a fucking spider

all is quiet and still for a while, your eyes flickering back and forth between your royal guard and the spider in a tense standoff

then, just as you are about to speak up, jongho grabs his bag and swiftly turns on his heels to head towards the room’s door

“where are you going?!” you shriek

he looks at you forlornly from over his shoulder, “to prepare for my execution”

“what the fuck are you on about, jongho?”

“for abandoning my duties and failing to protect you. farewell, princess. you are on your own from here-”

his sentence is cut short as the spider scuttles towards him

and that is how you two, disguised, but still a royal princess and royal guard no less, are given an eviction warning because he streaked through the corridors of the inn half naked and screaming at the top of his lungs

needless to say, the innkeeper ends up having to remove the spider for the two of you

“you’re so embarrassing,” you whisper to him once you two are finally settled in bed and on the sofa

“no, i’m jongho,” he cackles

you don’t humour him with a response, but you know he snickers himself to sleep that night

you can’t help but let the corner of your lips tug up as well

a few days later after leaving the town, you two are resting side by side against a tree trunk when you decide to grace jongho with the opportunity to redeem himself

he’s currently halving a sandwich so you two can share

“if i were trapped in a forest full of spiders and you were the only person who could save me,” you ask gravely, “what would you do?”

without missing a beat, he replies, “prepare to grieve your death and make sure your pet cat is well fed in your honour”

he passes you the bigger sandwich as you turn to look at him with the most scandalised expression

“can you at least pretend to think for a bit?” you grumble

there’s a hint of a smile on jongho’s face when he apologises, “okay, sorry. ask me again”

you hit him with a different scenario this time

“if you had to fight a giant spider who had taken me hostage, what would you do?”

he hums thoughtfully for a few seconds, unscrewing a canteen of water for you and placing it by your side

“i would say, she is all yours, your spidery majesty, and then i would bow and walk away”

“fuck you,” you shove him good-naturedly with your shoulder

he swipes the canteen before you can knock it over and presses it into your smaller hand instead, giving it a quick pat as he dismisses your insult, “sure, if you think you can handle my dick”

“like they say,” you waggle your eyebrows at him as your voice drops down lower, “practice makes perfect”

jongho’s stoic facade finally cracks when you lean in closer and he hurries to stand up and put some distance between you and him

he shifts his legs subtly, clearing his throat to say, “we should go, denport is close”

when you’ve finished off the last of your sandwich, you dust off your fingers and grab jongho’s offered hand to stand up too

“let’s go”

one thing you have both noticed is that the closer you get to the border between your kingdom and denport, the quieter and thicker the atmosphere seems to get

the small towns you pass through have less people roaming around; in fact, most people seem to flee back into the refuge of their own houses, locking their doors and closing their windows when they catch sight of your pair

and then it happens

your plan goes awry

you and jongho are harshly awoken by a commotion outside the small room you have rented for the night

there’s a sickening smell accompanied by wails of grief in the air

when you rush outside, all you can see is a huge crowd of people gathered and your ears strain to pick up on the broken hushes of information being thrown around

“his son is lucky to have been spared”

“lucky to have seen his father slaughtered by bandits?”

“i heard it wasn’t money that they were after, though”

“those damned denport devils are up to something”

that’s all you pick up on before jongho snatches your arm and leads you back into the inn, telling you that it’s too dangerous to be out there; too dangerous for you two to continue traveling

which leads to the very first argument you ever have with him

you two butt heads all the time with your own fiery fronts and hardheadedness but more often than not, he yields to you

you’re facing him in the dim room - it is shadier than that first inn you two made a stop at weeks ago, but you’re both sharing one room just like you two have done at every single inn since

“we need to go check it out!” you shout at him

jongho takes a shaky breath as he tries to keep his voice even, “no, we should go back to our kingdom, report on the situation and call for backup!”

you throw your hands up into the air, “we’re already here - we’re basically at denport! what if something blows up soon? it might be too late by the time we go back”

jongho steps in closer as his eyes narrow

you don’t cower because you know he would never hurt you, but you do step backwards because you don’t think you can keep a clear head when he is standing so close to you, proximity dizzying like the buzz of alcohol

“of all times for you to play hero and do something that you weren’t asked to, why now? why put yourself in danger?”

your back hits the wall as jongho corners you

your chest heaves, as does his, both of you overwhelmed with emotions

he holds your gaze but his eyes are rounded with agony and distress

you don’t understand why he is so against your decision

you don’t know what to say, until your eyes flicker down involuntarily at the movement of his lips parting to exhale-

“damn, jongho, your lips are real chapped. you should use some of my lip balm”

he blinks hard at the absurdity of what you chose to say

he looks at your lips

he makes a decision

“then give me some of yours,” he says, a little breathless

and then he’s pressing his chapped lips against your smooth ones, the taste of coconut filling your mouth as your lip balm smears

suddenly, he pulls back with the audacity to look shocked as if you are the one who kissed him

and then he leaves the room without another word

he doesn’t return that night and you don’t manage to sleep either

you wonder when you started becoming used to falling asleep with him in the same room

jongho clears his throat awkwardly when you open the door in the morning and find him leaning against the wall just by the doorframe

you’re not sure whether he came back not too long ago from god knows where, or whether he was actually standing guard outside all night

you think you know which one it is, even if he doesn’t confirm it

“we’re checking out,” he mumbles, shuffling briskly into the room to grab his few belongings he had left and exiting the room again with you trailing behind

neither of you say much more to each other

you think that he’s going to lead you back the way you two came, lead you back and undo the weeks’ worth of journeying and go back to the castle

but then he’s sighing, deep and burdened, and he gently takes your hand to continue on towards denport

he’s never held your hand before

not like this, at least, tenderly tugging you along with every step so that you are no more than a few inches away from his side

you want to bicker with him and chortle together like usual but you keep quiet, giving him the space that he appears to need even if he is physically ensuring you are tucked right into his side

you two walk until the sun has dipped below the horizon

from what you know, you are right along the southern border and denport will only be another half day’s walk away

jongho makes a small bonfire before he joins you to lean against a fallen log

he shimmies off his coat and drapes it over your legs and then the forest also settles into silence along with you both

it’s now or never

“why are you so against us going to the border?” you ask him

he runs his fingers through his hair

an unruly tuft of hair stays upright and you fold your arms to stop yourself from reaching out and smoothening it for him

he looks at you as he says, “i’m fine with me going to the border, it’s you i’m not fine with. you do remember that i’m your royal guard, right”

“is that all there is to your reason,” you push, “that you’re my guard?”

you both know you’re referring to more than just the argument itself

jongho’s gaze breaks away, looking ahead at the flames of the fire instead

he is silent

for once, jongho is unarmed; no immediate snark or teasing remark to toss back at you

you hear him swallow and take a breath

“i…i don’t know,” he starts. “all i know is that with each passing day, the more i want to keep you safe”

jongho looks at you again, eyebrows drawn down ever so slightly

“why do you make me feel so worried?”

at his words, your heart clenches in an unfamiliar way and you attempt to lighten the mood, “maybe you like me”

“maybe i do”

oh.

with the reflection of the fire dancing in his eyes, it almost looks as though he is about to cry

“please, don’t go to the border, princess,” he begs softly

his plea remains unwavering and you find your heart doing the exact opposite

after a few seconds of silence, you say

“okay, jongho. i won’t”

the tension from his shoulders seeps out and he gently tugs you towards him so he can tuck you into his side once again

“you promise that we turn around and go back tomorrow morning?”

you nod against the warmth of the crook of his neck, then murmur, “do you think father will be disappointed in me? for returning?”

he rubs a hand up and down your arm soothingly

“of course not, princess. you’ve already done so much more than you needed to. he’ll be proud of you”

and then he adds on, “just like i’m proud of you”

this is the first time anyone has ever really validated your efforts; being the youngest of a large family means you are often overshadowed

caught off guard, all you can do is whisper out, “thank you, jongho”

he hums and you feel his smile against the crown of your head

you’ve never been drunk before, but you think that this is the closest you have ever gotten

you are intoxicated by him

“if you’re thankful,” the rumble of jongho’s voice against your cheek is pleasant, “can i ask for something?”

“whatever you want”

he eases you from the comfort of his neck and tilts your chin up slightly with a finger, cheeky grin plastered across his face

“can i have some more of your lip balm?”

#chron <3 #MOOT MOOT #crying at how long it took me to reply to this reblog oop #AS ALWAYS #THE BIGGEST FATTEST MOST LOVING THANK YOU TO YOU #YOU MAKE ME LOVE MY WORKS #YOU MAKE ME LOVE WRITING #MWAH MWAH KITHES FOR YOU <33333333

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snickwrites · 3 months ago

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HOLY SHIT BOOK 3 OF SONG SERIES?!???!?!! IN THIS ECONOMY!!???? WE'RE EATING GOOD!!! OH MY GODDDDDD wendy!!! leon!!!! my god i feel like im going down memory lane like !!!!! WHAT A TIME! also ik you've previously mentioned agatha christie being a big influence but when i first read LS + DOAP i hadn't really read any of them but now that i literally took a mystery and suspense elective for my diploma, i can really like appreciate the old school cozy mystery vibes you can emulate in your writing! ANYWAYS i will unfortunately not read GT today (im in shambles) bc i have... midterm projects.... ahahahaa :'( ..... but good luck with your writing!!! hope you're doing well too :D – starsandcream

my love!!

i love your messages! they drop by like love letters to my inbox!

omg, good luck on your elective!! your diploma!! time really does fly so fast omg :,-) how's that going? i took psych back in uni myself, and i didn't catch any mystery and suspense elective because if there was, boy you bet i'd be there omg.

& thank you!! there's just truly something so special about the classics, i am actually trying to branch out! seeing other cosy mystery authors, see how they spin!

omg, take care of yourself, darling! midterms are... one of the few things i dont miss about university ahahah!!

and thank you, i'm doing quite well enough <3

i hope you get sleep, and lots of rest yourself <3 thank you for the message, it was very timely <3

#asks #h: starsandcream

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krockat · 1 year ago

Text

ourfgh! today is being quite the good day so far;

- had a lovely talk with a random greenpeace activist on the phone, quite a charming and mindfueling conversation we had

- and also i got good points in social interaction this time!!

- figured out my near-constant shaking might Actually be because i am cold and not because of the recent traumas

- and somehow being okay with that while it's still august being this cold and summer nearing its end,

- because at least i got to see the seasons changing! which i didn't think i would

- and atleast i have a body! that functions somewhat, just not in ways that i really know very well or recognize

- sitting out on my balcony (yes i do have a balcony now) and enjoying the light and scenery outside

- and also get to see the slight golden tinge that being up at this hours the light give the surroundings

- and feeling quite decent and even (nearing) good regarding my friends again! the outside-system friends, that is

- and i think also - am slowly decreasing the distance between me and some inside-system friends. it's still a distance and i am still not at the point of Just talking yet. but. it's. something

- i saw some pictures of myself tonight that made me feel pretty. like. that in the past - in those pictures - that i was pretty then. which i didn't really feel in those photos at the time.

because like. whenever some time passes and i look back at myself in photos - i can look at that person in the past and see that they are pretty.

and then i take new photos that i don't feel pretty in, and then a while after the same thing happens again.

in the present, i rarely ever feel as pretty as i can see myself being in the past. actually i never feel as good about myself in the present as i do when i see myself in a bit seperately in the past.

i also, mostly only take pictures of myself when i feel pretty enough to even take a photo. meaning, the moments where i am 'performing' the best.

meaning, it's an unfair view of myself, because i capture my 'best' 'most acceptable' moments of myself, and the rest don't get captured.

and as a person who due to many disabilities struggles with hygiene and washing and cleaning and dressing and

- BREAK PAUSE LMAO LMAO LMAO

another little joyful thing just happened.

another random unsaved number called. i usually never pick such calls up nowadays! but, i did another time just now.

a person who (probably intentionally) clumsily told me their introduction and said they were calling from "the cybersecurity department" said they were calling me on urgent business.

i, after listening to their introduction and giving them space to explain that, respond with a sweet and warm tone and say "oh i am not interested, but thank you very much."

and they respond "oh no! we are not selling you anything! it's an urgent matter regarding the safety of your computer"

and i smirked, and said "oh, well, i don't actually have a computer." (a lie).

after a second On The Millisecond they disconnect the call.

AHAHAHAA

further previous post plan cancelled! i am not gonna go into my disabilities or whatever the fuck - not right now!

i am gonna live on this goofy high for now. might order a donut and a sandwich and an iced coffee from somewhere :D

#ahahahahaaaaa #life is quite funny sometimes. what a joy that I can find joy in these things again!#krockat krockar #good life updates #positive mental health blast woahah

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chokchokk · 1 year ago

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friends with benefits to lovers!san (i think im a genius for this one)

i still think i'm a genius and you saying he's fuckbuddy!san just makes it so much better lilo bun, i am grinning into my mug. let's slurp my peppermint tea and slurp this U P

at least, that's what you both thought.

AH HAHA. ahHHH. ahahahaa. ahHHHHH. you silly. you silly gal lilo.

your connection was like a hidden flame, flickering in the shadows, igniting your desires whenever you were near. the chemistry between you was undeniable, an intoxicating cocktail of attraction and familiarity that drew you together time and time again.

is this going to turn into me highlighting every paragraph cause HOT (intended pun) DAMN wow that was loud and clear san and reader are bawls deep for each other aren't they PHEW this tea is surely hot wow

you found yourselves entwined on your couch

something about being intertwined with san is so real. like not even sexy (of course it is) but so real. like lilo this is so real.

you were the sole occupants of a universe built on raw desire. breathless and flushed, you lay side by side, gazing at the ceiling.

WOAHHHHHH. don't think the warmth that went down my chest was the tea damn!! the intensity of this whole paragraph is just wowhaowhaowhoa lilo !!!! DAYUM. mind-numbing.

"this… what we have, it's nice."

whatever it is

"yeah." (...) "no strings, no expectations. just us."

whatever the fuck you are saying

and also:

if you paid attention, you would’ve noticed he was spelling his name over the soft flesh.

love to drop insight information that reader is too silly and gone to notice lol !!!!!! like one of my favourite things to do and read fr !!! so sexy so so so sexy

"who's that?" san asked casually, but his eyes were sharp, observant.

stopped sipping my tea, mug sitting at my lip. me looking at invisible ghost who is always watching over me with an eyebrow raise: "u seeing this babes? he's so totally gonna get jealous lol. oh wait i requested this--"

"nothing important." - "you know you're important to me, right?"

l- lilo you actually gave me ptsd (this is 100% my own fault)

and it's-.. haha. something. wanna spit out the tea and slam the mug on the ground or something but (shrugs) you know. it is what it is

the words held more weight than just casual comfort. but then you chuckled, a touch nervously. "yeah, i know."

uh-huh uh-huh FUCK uh-huh i see what you workin' with. okay. hmhmhm. okay. okay.

san couldn't ignore the subtle changes.

he so attentive. he also probably not very subtle with it.

he's going to be such a pissy little bitch i will love it so much. LMAO

(tickles fingers together like a villain scheming)

it was like a storm gathering on the horizon, and san felt a growing unease in the pit of his stomach.

(horizon intro starting)

((it's the voice of san's inner demon))

(((i have no idea what's sung there)))

((((but san will get it.))))

"do you ever think about… us? like, beyond this?"

he, in fact, did get it. but not the note.

LMAO san you little cutie he is so real

"san, we agreed – no strings, no expectations. remember?"

FUCK YEAH USING SAN'S WORDS AGAINST HIS!!!!!!!! he can take that knife to his heart and his booba chest pillowplease i wannaknow how much muscl,e. i,;.s un;d..-,,;er ther,-ee.,,

he felt strangely unreadable compared to all the times you were able to read him like an open book.

SO SO REAL. we can all agree that san is secretive. great. wonderful. mhm. lilo. you're so real. you are catering to me so well bun. lol

why was he being so dry?

BECAUSE HE'S my PISSBOY!!!!!!! because he can't help himself!!!!!!!!

he couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy.

CAN'T HELP HIMSELF GET WORKED UP FOR READER!!!!

"do whatever you want to me." he muttered, his voice a mixture of frustration and longing as his hands traced your waist before stopping and pulling you towards him by your hips. “i need you.”

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK OH WOW. FUCK YEAH. THAT WAS SO WORTH IT. I KNEW I CHOSE THAT ONE SO WELL. FUCK I LOVE IT. I LOVE IT. THE "I NEED YOU"? LILO GENIUS. SO GENIUS.

“do you, now?”

he's such a cunt he's my good little boy fr.

once the words processed, you clicked your tongue, your gentle grip on his cheek hardening ever so slightly. "are you jealous? want me all to yourself, do you?"

did you write this with me in mind. bffr. this is so perfect. this is me. i didn't want to say it but this is me 100%.

"maybe a little," he admitted quietly, voice strained and jaw clenched.

san baby boy agenda. my metaphorical cockk twitched.

“are you not listening? i like you, y/n. i like you and for the past months i’ve had to watch a different guy get close to you in ways i could only long for.”

a bullet !!!!!!!!!!!! lol

“and it bothers me because even though you’re the one waking up in my sheets, i thought that i’m not the one you long for.”

a bullet through san's heart!!!!!!! (and mine (mostly his.))

unsure of what to say, you slipped your hand down from his face and pulled him into an embrace, holding him tightly as if you could anchor him to you.

omg pulling san into a hug is so real omg this whole interaction is just a heartthrob. san is so tiny and reader is so cute wowwwww

you clung to him, your fingers gripping his shirt that you knew would find a place on the floor by the end of the night.

are you insane lilo (it's the best. thank you)

sometimes, the heart had a way of demanding more than casual arrangements can provide. as you held each other, loved each other, you faced the uncertainty of what lay ahead – a future that was no longer just about stolen moments, but about the possibility of something deeper, something real.

WOAHHHHHHHHH YOU COME HERE YOU. LILO!!!!!!!! what an ending!!! me wants to think reader pines yeosang tho. lol. call me an asshole idfc pffft

hey heyhey lilo

thank you for producing something this EXCELLENT for me!!!!!!! glad you loved my little thought and LMAO maybe indulged a bit in it~? it seemed so carefully thought out, don't worry about the time it took!!! would have waited another month for the same thing i'm being fr

thank you lilo and again, congratulations on 600 followers!!!!!

600 FOLLOWER EVENT — FOUR — CHOI SAN.

requested by @chokchokk. "HELLO LILO BABES // first of all congratulations!!! <33 toasting on 600 followers and more to come YUH !!! so uh. about the request hehe. // friends with benefits to lovers!san (i think im a genius for this one) angstier hurt/comfort with suggestive themes! // i’ll leave the full scenario to your amazing mind!!! // hope you have fun with it xoxo" lilo’s notes. AHHH HI CHOY THANK YOU SO MUCH!! i absolutely love this request omg. also, i'm so sorry for taking so long to post this but it's finally here!!

prompts. “do whatever you want to me.” ; “are you jealous? want me all to yourself, do you?.” pairing. fwb! choi san x fem!reader

warnings. fuckbuddy!san, jealousy, suggestive themes, angst, hurt/comfort. wc. 0.7k

you and san had an unspoken agreement.

you were friends with benefits – two individuals who shared stolen moments, heated touches, and whispered confidences, all under the guise of a casual relationship. it was a pact, a bond that had no strings attached.

at least, that's what you both thought.

one evening, you found yourselves entwined on your couch, your lips tracing the contours of his skin that no one else got to see. it was as if the world outside didn't matter, and in that moment, you were the sole occupants of a universe built on raw desire. breathless and flushed, you lay side by side, gazing at the ceiling.

your fingers traced circles on san's bare chest, your voice a low whisper. "this… what we have, it's nice."

san turned his head to look at you, his hazy eyes reflecting the dim light of the room. "yeah," he replied softly, his fingers absentmindedly tracing patterns along your arm. if you paid attention, you would’ve noticed he was spelling his name over the soft flesh. "no strings, no expectations. just us."

you nodded, a small smile curving your lips. but in that instant, your phone pinged, signalling a message. you grabbed it from the coffee table and your smile faded as you read the text.

"who's that?" san asked casually, but his eyes were sharp, observant.

"just a friend," you said, but your voice held a hint of unease. "nothing important."

san's jaw clenched imperceptibly, but he chose not to press further. instead, he leaned in, his lips brushing against your earlobe. "you know you're important to me, right?"

you shivered at the touch of his lips, and for a moment, it seemed like the words held more weight than just casual comfort. but then you chuckled, a touch nervously. "yeah, i know."

after that evening, days turned into weeks, and your connection continued to burn brightly. yet, beneath the surface, an invisible shift was taking place. you had started spending more time with yeosang, a guy you'd met through mutual friends. you laughed at his jokes, your eyes lit up when he entered the room, and slowly, he became a fixture in your life.

san couldn't ignore the subtle changes. he noticed how your phone would light up with yeosang's messages, how you'd excuse yourself to take his calls, and the way your face softened when you talked about him. it was like a storm gathering on the horizon, and san felt a growing unease in the pit of his stomach.

one evening, after another intimate encounter, you lay entangled in each other's arms. it was your fingers that traced absent patterns on san's chest this time, just as they had done countless times before. but tonight, something was different. san felt a surge of frustration and insecurity building within him—and beneath all that, dread.

"y/n…" he began, his voice tense.

"yeah?" you looked up at him, your expression soft and open.

he hesitated, then blurted out, "do you ever think about… us? like, beyond this?"

you sighed and leaned up just a bit, your fingers gently brushing his cheek. "san, we agreed – no strings, no expectations. remember?"

"i know," he muttered, his jaw clenching. "but do you ever wonder if this could be more?"

your fingers stilled, and you gazed at him for a moment, searching his eyes as if trying to decipher his thoughts. but you couldn’t find anything. he felt strangely unreadable compared to all the times you were able to read him like an open book. "san, you know we were never exclusive. this was always casual."

he nodded, the muscle in his jaw twitching. "yeah, i get it."

it was hard to miss the gentle frown that overtook your face at his reply. why was he being so dry? your fingers gently nudged his chin so he was looking at you. "hey, we're still friends, okay? and i'll always be here for you. but i can't keep everything on hold because of our arrangement."

a bitter taste settled in san's mouth. "i know," he said, his voice strained.

you leaned in, your lips brushing against his. "i hope you understand."

later that night, san found himself alone in his apartment, wrestling with his emotions. he remembered your encounters, the stolen moments, the laughter, and the parts of him he had shared with you but wouldn’t dare even mention to anyone else. he had been so sure that your connection meant something more, even if you hadn't put a label on it. and now, seeing you with someone else, he couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy.

he picked up his phone and typed out a message to you.

"come to my place?"

within minutes, your reply came.

"i’ll be there in 10."

just as you had promised, you arrive in ten minutes. the process of ringing the door bell, him opening the door, and then leading you to his bedroom was mostly silent. you could tell something was on his mind, but knew better than to pry- knowing san well enough, he’d tell you upfront what was wrong without the need of your prompting him.

"do whatever you want to me." he muttered, his voice a mixture of frustration and longing as his hands traced your waist before stopping and pulling you towards him by your hips. “i need you.”

your gaze softened, and you reached out to touch his cheek. "san, i never wanted to hurt you. you mean a lot to me."

“do you, now?” he tilted his head to the side, a darker expression crossing his eyes for a split second. it was gone before you could fully register it, but his next words made sense of how he was behaving. “i bet yeosang means a lot to you, too, huh?”

taken aback, you blink at him silently. once the words processed, you clicked your tongue, your gentle grip on his cheek hardening ever so slightly. "are you jealous? want me all to yourself, do you?"

his lips quivered, and for a moment, it seemed like he might cry. but he controlled his expression so well it might compete with the way he controlled you in bed. "maybe a little," he admitted quietly, voice strained and jaw clenched.

“if it’s about yeosang, what does that have to do with you, san?”

his reply was sharp, cutting through the silent environment like a bullet. “are you not listening? i like you, y/n. i like you and for the past months i’ve had to watch a different guy get close to you in ways i could only long for.” he paused for a moment, his breath hot on your face. “and it bothers me because even though you’re the one waking up in my sheets, i thought that i’m not the one you long for.”

unsure of what to say, you slipped your hand down from his face and pulled him into an embrace, holding him tightly as if you could anchor him to you. “i… i’m so sorry.”

"i wish things were different," he murmured.

you clung to him, your fingers gripping his shirt that you knew would find a place on the floor by the end of the night. a beat of silence passed between the two of you before you spoke. "they can be."

[ networks . . . ] @cromernet @blankjournal

[ perm taglist . . . ] @ad0rechuu @sankatchu

#the tea always gets so cold in the end #but the bittersweetness of the tea-bag is so reminiscent of this fic #i loved it!#i really did #it made me feel!!!#and that is all i wanted and more!!!#thank you lilour #<33 #chaekchaek

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