#ag meta

[samantha-and-nellie]

i know turn-of-the-century ideas about adulthood are vastly different than ours, but do you ever think about how young cornelia is?

like, it's her first christmas with her boyfriend's family. the girl that is going to be her niece is the age as her younger sisters. she's grown up with sisters who are sam's age, and yet she's somehow crossed into womanhood and they're still getting to enjoy their girlhood.

and you can see that it the christmas book! you can see this confusion (longing? nostalgia?) in cornelia as she experiences this last christmas as an unmarried young woman. she can't spend it with her sisters, but she can gosh darn spend it with another girl their age, and so these moments of cornelia's girlhood peek through as she's trying to bond with samantha.

she gets sam to make gingerbread with her like cornelia would usually be doing with her sisters. she goes sledding with her and gard, and cornelia has this moment where she gets so caught up in the joy of it all that even sam can see how young she is.

and then they're downtown, and cornelia spots a beautiful doll in a shop window and, just for one moment, she forgets that's she's too old to want a doll. except that “just a moment” lasts for days, so she ends up going back to buy the doll for samantha because that’s the next best thing to buying it for herself.

sam gets her doll, and cornelia gets a ring.

and i know that cornelia growing up and getting married is not a tragedy, but for some moments it feels like it is because it means that sam is next. and the womanhood that cornelia experiences seems joyful and privileged and purposeful, but it's still not girlhood. cornelia's not putting can telephones through the lilac hedge, or threatening the annoying neighborhood boy. cornelia's not starting schools in the tower room, befriending the servant girl next door, bedgrudingly practicing piano for an hour a day and then going to get gingerbread from the cook.

and, if all goes well, eventually neither will sam

[saints-who-never-existed]

“In the war film, a soldier can hold his buddy—as long as his buddy is dying on the battlefield. In the western, Butch Cassidy can wash the Sundance Kid’s naked flesh—as long as it is wounded. In the boxing film, a trainer can rub the well-developed torso and sinewy back of his protege—as long as it is bruised. In the crime film, a mob lieutenant can embrace his boss like a lover—as long as he is riddled with bullets. 

Violence makes the homo-eroticism of many “male” genres invisible; it is a structural mechanism of plausible deniability.”

–Tarantino’s Incarnational Theology: Reservoir Dogs, Crucifixions, and Spectacular Violence. Kent L. Brintnall.

[dalishious]

The Sanitized Lore of Dragon Age: The Veilguard

Tevinter is the heart of slavery in Thedas. This lore has been established in every game, novel, comic, and other extended material in the Dragon Age franchise to date that so much as mentions the nation. But in Dragon Age: The Veilguard, when we are finally able to actually visit this location for the first time… this rampant slavery we’ve heard so much about is nowhere to be found. It’s talked about here and there; Neve mentions The Viper has a history of freeing slaves, as does Rook themselves if they choose the Shadow Dragon faction as their origin, for example. But walking down the streets of Minrathous, you’d never know. Because Dragon Age: The Veilguard, for all its enjoyment otherwise, has one glaring issue: It’s too clean.

The world of Thedas is full of injustices. Humans persecute elves, fear qunari, and belittle dwarves. Mages of any race are treated like caged animals in most places. The nobility is corrupt. Although, Dragon Age has not always handled these injustices well, mind you. Many, many times I’ve found myself frustrated with moments that just feel like a Racism Simulator. But what makes it worth it, is when you can actually do something about it. These injustices are things that a good-aligned character strives to fight back against, maybe even for very personal reasons. Part of the power-fantasy for many minorities is that this fight feels tangible. I cannot arrange the assassination of a corrupt politician in real life, but I sure can get Celene Valmont stabbed to death in Dragon Age: Inquisition, for example. Additionally, these fictional injustices can be used to make statements on real life parallels, like any source of media. For example, no, the Chant of Light is not real, but acting as a stand-in for Catholicism, through a media analysis lens we can explore what the Chant of Light communicates on a figurative level.

When starting Dragon Age: The Veilguard and selecting to play as an elf – this should be unsurprising to anyone who is familiar with my bias towards them – I was fully prepared to enter the streets of Minrathous and immediately get called “knife-ear” or “rabbit”. But this did not happen. I thought perhaps it was just a prologue thing, but returning to Minrathous once again, there was not a single shred of disapproval from any NPC I encountered that wasn’t a generic enemy to fight. And even the generic enemies, the Tevinter Nationalist cult of the Venatori, didn’t seem to care at all that I was a lineage they deemed inferior before now. This is a stark difference from entering the Winter Palace in Dragon Age: Inquisition and immediately getting hit with court disapproval and insults. Are we now to believe that Tevinter has somehow solved its astronomical racism and classism problems in the ten years since the past game? Or perhaps are we to believe all the characters who have demonstrated Tevinter’s systemic discriminatory views were just lying or outliers? Because it makes absolutely no sense at all for this horribly corrupt nation to not have a shred of reactivity to an elven or qunari Rook prancing around. But here were are, and not a single NPC even recognizes my character’s lineage. And because this is so different from every single past game, it feels weird.

As an elf, you have the option to make a comment about how “too many humans look down on us” in one scene early in the game. You can also talk to Bellara and Davrin, the elven companions, about concerns that people won’t trust elves after finding out about the big bad Ancient Evanuris… but this is presented as if elves don’t already face persecution. It’s all so limited in scope that it could be all too easily missed if you are not paying very close attention, and coming into the game with pre-existing lore knowledge.

All this made it easy to first assume that the developers simply over-corrected an attempt to address the Racism Simulator moments. And if that was the case, than I would at least give credit to effort; they did not find the right balance, but they at least tried. However, the sudden lack of discrimination against different lineages in Dragon Age: The Veilguard is not the only sanitized example of lore present.

In Dragon Age: Origins, Zevran Arainai is a companion who is from the Antivan Crows; a group of assassins. He discusses in detail how the Crows buy children and raise them into murder machines through all kinds of torture. The World of Thedas books also describe how the Antivan Crows work, echoing what Zevran says and expanding that of the recruitment, only a select handful of those taken by the Crows even survive. When you start Dragon Age: The Veilguard as an Antivan Crow, you immediately unlock a re-used codex entry from the past, “The Crows and Queen Madrigal”, that says the following:

“His guild has a reputation to uphold. They are ruthless, efficient, and discreet. How would they maintain such notoriety if agents routinely revealed the names of employers with something as "banal" as torture.”

Ruthless, efficient, and discreet. Torture is banal. This is what the Crows were before Dragon Age: The Veilguard decided to take them in a very different direction. The Antivan Crows in this latest game are painted as freedom fighters against the Antaam occupation of Treviso. Teia calls the Crows “patriots”. And while I can certainly believe that the Crows would have enough motivation to fight back against the Antaam, given that it is in direct opposition to their own goals, I cannot understand why they are suddenly suggested to be morally good. They are assassins. They treat their people like tools and murder for money. Even as recent as the Tevinter Nights story Eight Little Talons, it is addressed that the Antivan Crows are in it for the coin and power, with characters like Teia being outliers for wanting to change that. It makes the use of the older codex all the more confusing, as it sets the Antivan Crows up as something they are no longer portrayed as.

I personally think it would have been really interesting to explore a morally corrupt faction in comparison to say, the Shadow Dragons. Perhaps even as a protagonist, address things like the enslavement of “recruits” to make the faction at least somewhat better. (They are still assassins, after all.) Instead, we’re just supposed to ignore everything unsavory about them, I suppose…

We could discuss even further examples. Like how the Lords of Fortune pillage ruins but it’s okay, because they never sell artifacts of cultural importance, supposedly. Or how the only problem with the Templar Order in Tevinter is just the “bad apples” that work with Venatori. I could go on, but I don’t think I have to.

It is because of all this sanitization, that I cannot believe this was simply over-correction on a developmental part. Especially when there is still racism in the game, in other forms. The impression I’m left with feels far deeper than that; it feels corporate. As if a computer ran through the game’s script and got rid of anything with “too much” political substance. The strongest statements are hidden in codex entries, and I almost suspect they had to be snuck in.

Between a Racism Simulator and just ignoring anything bad whatsoever, I believe a balance is achievable; that sweet spot that actually has something to say about what it is presenting. I know it is achievable, because there are a few bright spots of this that I’ve encountered in Dragon Age: The Veilguard too. For example, some of the codex entries like I mentioned, and almost all the content with the Grey Wardens thus far. It is a shame there is not more content on this level.

Dragon Age: The Veilguard is overall still a fun game, in my opinion. But it’s hard to argue that it isn’t missing the grit of its predecessors. The sharp edges have been smoothed. The claws have been removed. The house has been baby-proofed. And for what purpose?

-----

Want to support me writing more essays like this? Become a Patron!

[enigmalea]

Before Veilguard's release I was theorizing the Veilguard companion characters might have been designed to be parallels to the known Evanuris, but I couldn't place all of them.

Now that I've played the game (almost twice) I think I've figured them all out.

Rook - Elgar'nan, the leader. Controller of light and dark. The one who influences the others.

Neve - Mythal, who can be a fierce protector or a source of inspiration and hope.

Harding - Andruil, the hunter, who went mad from the Void and had to fight her way back

Bellara - June, the inventor. Master of magical artifact.

Lucanis - Dirthamen, keeper of secrets, who mastered the twin ravens of Fear and Deceit, and returned from death.

Davrin - Ghilan'nain, Master of Monsters, Keeper of Halla.

Emmrich - Falon'Din, the necromancer. Friend of the dead.

Taash - Sylaise, who's fire cannot be quenched.

Which leaves Solas to play the role he always has - Fen'Harel, the trickster and betrayer, who could ally with them, if only they will listen to his advice and try to protect their world as best as they can.

[dclovesdanny]

DcxDp prompt

Teen dad Danny Fenton moving into Crime Alley and getting a reputation for helping. Street kids willing to babysit Ellie and Dan while he’s job hunting can spend the night, have a meal, get cash, whichever they choose. Sec workers who do Ellie’s hair/nails/babysit some nights also get the same benefits. He will treat anyone with injuries for the low price of showing Ellie and Dan their guns/taking them to the observatory/getting him job opportunities.

All of the people in Crime Alley know the single meta dad with two kids, who has helped half the alley at least. Everyone is also aware of how Ellie calls her other parent ‘The Bastard’, and how bad their nightmares are, the ones they have to call Danny for(A few of his repeat guests have seen the scars and burns on his arms. Some of the older street kids recognize that hunted look he gets when people touch him when he doesn’t know they are there. Some of the sec workers notice how protective he is of his kids, and the younger workers. No matter who they are, they all notice how Dan gets quiet and angry when asked about his ‘other dad’. They all have sworn never to let those kids go back to the other dad, Danny included. They are a part of Crime Alley now, and they protect their own)

Danny doesn’t realize how far his reputation goes/how much everyone trusts him until two of his regulars bring in an injured Red Hood, promising him whatever he wants in exchange for him helping their boss.

[bluerosefox]

Stellar Collisions

Back at it again with a DPxDC prompt.

It does have deaged Dani (Ellie)

Only this time its KonxDanny idea!~

Supernova, Kon's new hero name since Jon took over the Superboy name now, wasn't expecting to be called out to... especially in the sky... by another floating/flying person and-

WOW

They were cute as heck.

Glowing green eyes, and white hair, a bit shorter than him. He was floating in the air with a soft glow around himself as well.

And he was holding a white haired, very similar looking toddler in his arms, only the toddler had longer hair that was tied in pigtails. And the toddler was staring at Kon with large, almost sparkling eyes.

The young man, around Kon's age if he guessed, smiled and floated a bit closer, his face friendly and warm. When the young man stopped he kindly asked "Hey, would it be any trouble for you to autograph something for my daughter? She's a huge fan!"

[chanafehs]

Vivienne’s line about “a leash can be pulled both ways” is actually so fascinating because it can not only be applied to its original context (Mages & Templars) but to the Inquisitor themselves - as many have discussed the Inquisitor loses their standing, their heritage, their identity to this weird Andrastian cult up in the mountains regardless of what they personally believe. They are the Herald of Andraste, the leader of this massive powerful religious military organization that has its hands in every holding in Thedas and yet the Inquisitor is controlled by everyone else. You are locked into centrist diplomacy, the game is playing you as much as you are playing it. You can make choices but all of the choices you make are guided and picked apart by everyone else, you lose your entire personhood to become someone that everyone around you has molded you into and you cannot escape. The dichotomy between Vivienne and Sera becomes even more interesting because on one hand, Sera keeps trying to humanize you and tear down the barrier between you and the average person (or followers of you), while Vivienne wants you to harness your position since it is all you can do because escape is not an option - harkening back to her experience as a circle mage. Dragon Age Inquisition fundamentally gives you a protagonist sitting in the most powerful position in Thedas and the only thing you cannot control is yourself.

[elvenforestwitch]

Dragon age 2 is really like "the mage-templar conflict is highly nuanced and there is no telling who is truly correct. Anyway this is where we store our mages. It's an island with a fortress called The Gallows and it's an old slave prison."

[samantha-and-nellie]

one thing that i wish the books had addressed is how haunting it must’ve been for samantha to visit coldrock house. i think the fandom really easily forgets that samantha is an orphan (and has been since she was around jenny’s age) because she has an otherwise functional and loving family in her life. but there’s no way that she never thought about the fact that she could’ve ended up in a place like coldrock house had she come from a different background… i cannot imagine how haunting that must’ve felt, especially at her age, and i think it makes it even clearer why she was so determined to get nellie and her sisters out of the orphanage

[simpforsolas]

You ever think about how Cole, a literal spirit of compassion, seems to care so much for Solas? Yes, he tries to connect with others and help them as well, but what they have is not the trust and affection he holds for Solas. Cole stands up for Solas on various occasions:

Vivienne: You should not encourage that thing. Cole: Solas is not a thing.

or

Cole: Solas doesn’t want to hurt people! He’s not that kind of wolf!

or

Cole: You didn’t do it to be right. You did it to save them. Inquisitor: Solas, what is he talking about? Solas: A mistake. One of many made by a much younger elf who was certain he knew everything. Cole: You weren’t wrong.

Or how about the fact that after Solas left, Cole went looking for him in the fade out of compassion, and Solas had to tell him to forget?

Cole's entire being is based around a single attribute: compassion. Because of this, he's drawn to a) people with pain for him to heal and b) people who are kind. He can sense that Solas has much hurt to heal, though Solas is able to conceal it from Cole in ways others cannot, but I think he also cares for Solas because he understands who he is at his core. He understands that despite what Solas has done or plans to do, he doesn't want to hurt people. He doesn't care about being right, he cares about helping. In truth, analyzing Cole and Solas's relationship is extremely revealing of who Solas really is. If the spirit of compassion who can read minds and emotions has so much affection for Solas and sees his motivations as coming from a place of goodness, that seems much more honest and true to me than someone making a judgment of him based outward factors.

The more I play inquisition, the more I use Cole as a moral compass. He may not understand the world, but one thing he understands is compassion, and every decision he makes is rooted in love for others. So if Cole cares for Solas and doesn't see him as a monster, then I believe that no matter what he ends up doing, this is proof that Solas is someone worth caring for. Someone with good within him.

[vaguely-concerned]

I understand and agree with a lot of the frustrations about the shortcomings of Inquisition as a story. but sometimes when I hear people complain about the chosen one narrative in it I do want to just be like... you know it's a deconstruction of the concept more than anything, right. the inquisitor isn't actually chosen by anything except stumbling into the wrong (right?) room at the right (wrong?) time because they like, heard a noise or whatever. or if you think they are chosen, as many do in-universe, that's something you have to take on faith, the maker-or-whoever moves in mysterious ways indeed-style. the Inquisitor isn't actually a Destined Chosen One, they're a Just Some Guy in a fancy hat, self-delusions of grandeur to taste as you'd prefer.

a running thread that goes through all of the personal quests of the companions is the concept of a comforting lie vs. an uncomfortable truth, upholding old corrupt structures vs. disrupting them, and the role of faith in navigating that. (blackwall the warden vs. thom rainier the liar and murderer. hissrad vs. the iron bull, or is that the other way around? cassandra and the seekers -- do we tell the truth about what we find, even if it means dismantling the old order of the world? and so on.) and your inquisitor IS at the same time a comforting lie (a necessary one, in dark times? the game seems to ask) and an uncomfortable truth (we are the result of random fickle chance, no protective hand is held over the universe, it's on us to make a better world because the maker sure as hell won't lift a divine finger to help anyone, should he against all odds exist). faith wielded for political power... where's the point that it crosses the line into ugliness? is it before it even begins? what's the alternative? will anyone listen to the truth, if you tell it?

interesting how you also get a mix of companion agency in this -- you have characters like dorian who ALWAYS choose one side of the comforting lie vs. uncomfortable truth dichotomy. he will always make up his own mind to go back to tevinter and try to dismantle the corruption of the old system no matter what you say, or how you try to influence him. meanwhile iron bull is on the complete opposite side of the spectrum -- so psychologically trapped and mangled, caught in an impossible spiritual catch-22, that his sense of identity is left entirely to you and your mercy. you cannot change dorian in any way that matters; you can be his friend or not, support him or not, but he is whole no matter what. you are given incredible and potentially destructive-to-him power over bull's soul. it's really cool (and heartbreaking) to think about.

this is a game about how history will eat you even while you're still alive, and shape you into whatever image it pleases to serve it, and for all your incredible power right now you are powerless in the face of the gravitational force of time -- of more than time, of History. you won't recognize yourself in what History will make of you, because you belong to it now. you don't belong to yourself anymore and you never will again. the further you were from what it needs from you to begin with, the more you will find yourself distorted in its funhouse mirror. (why hello there inquisitor ameridan, same hat!)

and to me this is so much the core of what Dragon Age is about right from the Origins days -- how and by whom history gets written, the inherent unreliable narration of it all. I hope you like stories, Inquisitor. You are one now.

I do think it's probably still the weakest of the games narratively, and it's hampered by its structure and bloated systems. but I also find it disingenous to say that there's nothing deeper or actually interesting going on with it, thematically. if you're willing to engage with it there is Some Real Shit going on under the high fantasy-tinted surface.

[veilkeeper]

i do have to say that i like elgar'nan and ghilan'nain as our primary villains. because they look like cartoon bad guys on the surface but if you look a little deeper and find all those hidden little notes and codex entries, it's obvious they actually do have complexity that they don't want us to see.

ghilan'nain is actively in mourning. not just for andruil, but also for her fucked up little experiment of an archdemon, her most perfect creation, razikale. at the end of fire and ice, she is ready to throw herself into a fight that she might not win because she's blinded by her own grief, and she only doesn't because elgar'nan holds her hand and pulls her away. protects her. we can find notes that talk about how elgar'nan is concerned that she's not taking time to mourn properly. we know she's checked in on her first creations, the halla, despite the fact that she writes about them in this sort of detached, almost patronizing way. she calls them something she made when she was "untraveled and naive" and that she could never make them again, but she visited them just to see what they might have become in her absence. like she cares more than she wants to let herself.

and elgar'nan calls her sister, despite the fact that ghilan'nain is the youngest of them. he lets her experiment on lusacan for the express purpose of cheering her up. and when she dies he seems legitimately torn apart by it. what should be an opportunity for the first of the firstborn to finally become the sole tyrant he was practically made to be is instead him becoming completely and utterly alone, the only remaining of his kind. i don't think it's coincidence that both he and solas drift to each other as they do, even if it is as enemies. they're too alike, and they're also the only remnants of the old world, their world, that either of them have.

i can't say that i'm particularly sympathetic to either of them—they're both unrepentant monsters who have committed atrocities across millenia, but the fact that they have this hidden depth reminds me that at of the day they are not really anything that no one else is. they are very powerful mages that other people called gods. and people can be very sentimental, indeed.

[dalishious]

Dragon Age: The Veilguard’s Familiar Faces and Factions

The trailer for Dragon Age: The Veilguard has dropped, and I couldn’t be more excited. It’s like a new breath of life has entered my lungs!

Within the trailer, we now have confirmation of who our seven companions are going to be, and among them are a few familiar faces from the book Dragon Age: Tevinter Nights. We also have some name-droppings of a couple factions featured in the same book and the comics, Dragon Age: The Missing. So, here is what knowledge is established about these faces sand factions.

Neve Gallus & The Shadow Dragons

Neve Gallus was first introduced in the Tevinter Nights story, “The Streets of Minrathous”. She comes off as a no-nonsense and a little intense kind of person. Neve is a Tevinter mage who works as a private investigator. For example, if someone wants some detective work done but doesn’t want the public to know, they would hire Neve. On occasion, she’s even been hired by the templars, who act like just regular cops in Tevinter – and yes, that includes their corruption and primary goal of simply protecting the elite – but Neve prefers to work alone because of that corruption, and has a personal grudge against the order for taking bribes to cover up crimes.

Neve has a prosthetic leg below the knee, made of dwarven-crafted metal.

In The Missing, Neve says she is friends with the Shadow Dragons. In the article shared by EA, as of The Veilguard, she is officially a member. The Shadow Dragons are a group of concerned Tevinter citizens who help those in need. This includes supporting escaped slaves, for example.

Emmrich Volkahrin

Emmrich Volkahrin was first introduced in the Tevinter Nights story, “Down Among the Dead Men”. He is a necromancer from Nevarra, and therefore naturally a member of the Mortalitasi – specifically, a professor in the Mourn Watch. The Watchers serve as elite guardians of the Grand Necropolis. Emmrich is on the eccentric side, personality-wise, but kindly and informal.

Emmrich has a skeleton assistant name of Manfred, who helps him with different office tasks. He also has friends in Myrna, a fellow Watcher, and Audric, a dead guardsmen who looks after the library.

Lucanis Dellamorte

Lucanis Dellamorte was first introduced in the Tevinter Nights story, “The Wigmaker Job”. He is the favourite grandson of Caterina Dellamorte, First Talon (leader) of the Antivan Crows. As such, he was raised from birth to be the perfect assassin in a ruthless and torturous environment, knowing only cruelty from his family. This has led to him feeling less like a person and more like a living weapon – and he is treated like one by everyone who knows of him. He has “the Demon” as a nickname.

I know a few people are curious about the “mage killer” title in the trailer. Rest assured that Lucanis specifically kills evil blood mages. In his own words: “If someone wants to pay me top coin to kill a bunch of racist blood mages—who have it coming—I’m not going to complain.”

Where his cousin Illario has a “silver tongue” as Lucanis puts it, he himself is a lot blunter. His reputation of a killer is spotless, except for one small problem: He has a heart under all that black leather.

Lucanis and Illario get along quite well, except for the fact that Lucanis is destined to be the next First Talon, after Caterina dies. Illario wants the job far more than Lucanis, but Lucanis isn’t sure he’s capable of making a decision for himself that goes against the wishes of the Crows.

The Veil Jumpers

The Veil Jumpers were first introduced in The Missing #3. They are a group made up of primarily Dalish elves, though also inclusive of other folks of any walks of life willing to help, working to try and control the new threats within Arlathan Forest. The forest has become a ground of chaotic magic, with the Veil so thin that time and place is jumbled together. Thus, the Veil Jumpers move in and out of the spots that bleed into one another.

The Veil Jumpers do have a headquarters called “The Sanctum”, but we know nothing else about it.

The Lords of Fortune

Despite the Lords of Fortune being mentioned in more than one Tevinter Nights story, as well as the show Dragon Age: Absolution, we don’t know a lot about them. The only concrete information provided is that they are a loose group of people who collect trinkets and glory. They come out of Rivain. They typically wear a lot of their collected trinkets like badges of honour. That’s really all there is, so I can’t wait to learn more.

[two-corpses-in-the-burial-mounds]

Anyone else think a lot about how at the end of canon, Lan Wangji has had time to mature for 10+ years into a guy in his mid-30s, but Wei Wuxian still has the life experience and general maturity of a war-traumatized early 20-something?

Because like. Wei Wuxian died young and he died tragically, and everyone who was around him then that's still there after he's resurrected has gotten to live their lives. They got to mature. They've had 13/16 years to heal (or not heal -_-) and learn who they are. To become fully realized adults outside of the pressures of war. And Wei Wuxian hasn't had that. If you believe MXTX's interview that circulates on this site sometimes, he spent those 16 years in a suspended state of agony. And even if you don't believe that, he was still dead. Non-existant.

For Wei Wuxian, the war is fresh. The pain is fresh. He has no idea what's doing because he's barely an adult, if admittedly a highly skilled one for his age. The world has moved on around him and he has stayed in place. What does he do with that?

Wei Wuxian had no choice but to pretend that he's moved on, too, because that war that took so much from him was almost two decades ago, now. The Wen Remnants have been dead for over 10 years. What use is it to dig up old hurts? Except, those hurts are still hurting him.

When he died, Wei Wuxian was helping care for Lan Sizhui. Wen Yuan. When he died, Lan Wangji raised A-Yuan with the Lan. If Wei Wuxian was dead for 13/16 years and A-Yuan was 3/4 when he died, then Lan Sizhui is about his age, or very close to it.

This is the child he was raising. This child is now his peer.

Wei Wuxian has memories of war and tragedy, but no one to talk to. The juniors, who are closest to him in relative age, haven't known war, and everyone who has known it has moved on. He's trapped between generations, and that has to be so incredibly isolating.

Jiang Yanli, the Wen Remnants, Wen Qing of particular note, all of them died shortly before he did. Did he ever really get to grieve them? Will he be allowed to now? Especially with his reputation. Especially with the number of people who would really prefer him to simply leave the past in the past. Especially with all the people who think he is the cause of the deaths he wishes to grieve.

Will he be allowed to mourn, if the cultivation world thinks these deaths are his fault? Or that these people don't deserve to be grieved?

Wei Wuxian has the misfortune of being a man who is a decade out of time, and he will have to learn to cope with that, but how does he account for the missing years? When the pain is still fresh for him, how does he find a place in a society that has long since moved on?

[thievinghippo]

I'm never getting over Emmrich's face here, just after Rook has flirted with him over a dead body. This is a man who has dreamed of love, has yearned for it for years and never truly expected to find it at his age

I think it's very telling how in the garden date he says it's been years since he's had company, not that it's been years since he's been in a relationship. My guess is he's mostly had very discreet liaisons with fellow Mourn Watchers over the years, maybe the occasional noble when he's helped with their problems. But that he has very limited experience with actual relationships (because of his first partner, Hezenkoss, a hill I will die on)

And then Rook

At first, I'm sure he brushed it off. I have to imagine that flirting with Professor Volkarin is a rite of passage for young students of necromancy, which would explain how he didn't miss a beat the first time Rook flirts with him

But then Rook keeps showing up. And keeps flirting. Rook compliments his necromancy, his looks, his kindness, all things that are important to him as a person. (We know he's a bit vain. A gentleman is never without a brush and a razor, after all)

This, I think, is the moment that he actually lets himself hope. That he starts to wonder 'what if?' And eventually, those hopes will lead him to a love that he could have only imagined in his dreams

[hyperions-light]

screaming and crying and throwing up because Davrin and Lucanis can’t be friends until their fundamental conceptions of who they are and how the world works are destroyed

Davrin the Monster Hunter meets Lucanis, the Demon of Vyrantium, and he sees a Monster. The first thing Davrin says to him is that if Spite takes over he will kill him, and Lucanis responds with more than typical ire for him, because he agrees— he IS the monster (in his own mind) and Davrin has identified what he’s trying to ignore. (Harding also threatens to kill him, but Lucanis never reacts in that way to her).

Davrin conceptualizes himself as a bulwark against the darkness, the grim defender. He IS Weisshaupt, and Weisshaupt cannot fall, but it does. He stabs an Archdemon and does not die, and he doesn’t know why. What is he if not this? He did not protect anyone, he did not save anyone; he did not succeed in preserving anything he valued.

Lucanis has lost everything, but he is still a professional, he is still a Crow, and if he is now a monster he can use that to his advantage. He can control it; he WILL control it. He will go back to work and make things right the way he knows how. But when it’s time to do what he has trained for, he fails. What is he if he cannot even do the thing for which he was made? The only thing he has left?

And then Davrin goes to the Cauldron, and he finds the Gloom Howler, and she was a Person. She was a Warden, and an elf and the keeper of griffons, just like Davrin. Suddenly, she’s not a monster anymore; she’s Isseya, and she’s hurt.

And Lucanis goes to Treviso to kill Zara, and it’s taken from him and he loses control. He has to ask Rook for help, which he has been trying not to do, because he hasn’t confronted the real problem. And in that moment, he loses everything he had left; Illario, because he sees him for what he is, and his cloak of professionalism, because if it had been a job he would have stopped. But her death was not enough, and now he’s not a Crow, and he’s not in control, so what is he?

AND NOW that everything that can be broken has been broken and every bad thing they were afraid of actually happened and the world is ending, NOW they can be friends! Now they can rebuild themselves together ! Because Davrin isn’t ONLY the Monster Hunter, he’s also the man who raises Assan and sings to the halla and talks Isseya down! And Lucanis is not a monster at all. He’s just a man who goes grocery shopping for his friends and cooks special meals for everyone and loves his family no matter how much they hurt him.

Shokra toh ebra! You must struggle with what you are, but you can struggle TOGETHER !!