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highqueenofelfhame · 2 years ago

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rowaelin // 5.8k words // masterlist // ciwyw masterlist let me know if you want to be tagged in my writing :) i hope you enjoy <3 i can't wait to see all your comments. y'all are kILLING me with them on this one.

As much as he knew he shouldn’t be, Rowan was drunk. Again.

Tomorrow they had a match against Adarlan on Doranelle’s home field. While Rowan laid on his back, staring at the ceiling fan above him with a full half-empty bottle of whiskey resting on his stomach, he knew they were going to lose. Not because Adarlan was better or because they wanted it more, but because Rowan was a selfish piece of shit and couldn’t put the bottle down. There was no way he would be in any condition to play tomorrow— at least not well.

Burying his sorrows at the bottom of the bottle seemed like the better alternative until he could figure out how to repair what he had catastrophically obliterated. It had been a full week with no word from Aelin. Not a single one of those days had passed without him sending an apology text into the void. There had even been a few voicemails Wednesday night that went unanswered. He wouldn’t be surprised if she was erasing them without bothering to listen. He deserved that much.

Rowan Whitethorn had never had social media. Ever. Not even in high school when it was just becoming a cool thing to do. Nobody needed to know that much about his life. At this point in his career, his agent and PR team begged him to do it because it would garner him more popularity. Even Lorcan posted on instagram from time to time and kept everyone happy.

The thing that finally drove Rowan to making an instagram account was stalking Aelin Ashryver Galathynius. It was easier for his thumbs to scroll through her feed while nursing sips of whiskey, trying not to double tap on any pictures. He was pathetic enough— Aelin didn’t need to be aware of his sulking and pining.

This all came after he googled her name paired with various words like ‘spouse,’ ‘husband,’ ‘wife,’ and ‘wedding.’ Nothing came back with a result, but it had been lurking in his mind when she didn’t answer his question earlier. Besides, Rhoe Galathynius very well could have been her father-in-law. As it were, she wasn’t married, and Evalin and Rhoe only had one child: their daughter. At least if she was married, there was no record of it. No photos of her in an elegant white gown standing next to the love of her life.

Good. He could deal with that.

What he couldn’t deal with was the photos of her in bikinis, arms wrapped around the waists of other men. She was nestled between the pair on the deck of a yacht all three of them with wide smiles and sunglasses covering their eyes. Her bathing suit looked more like lingerie and Rowan had never wished so hard for summer to come back around than he was right then.

There were pictures of her with a stunning brunette woman, both of them dressed in finery or night-out attire depending on where they were headed. Aelin with a full face of makeup, with sultry dark eyes and a full pouty lip was enough to drive him into madness.

He found photographs from holidays with her family, Aelin perched on a couch in comfy clothes and thick socks with Aedion Ashryver standing behind her. Further down her page he found the ones from years ago of her on Aedion’s shoulders after he won some match or another. It was captions Always my hero.

Lower and lower he went until he finally hit her first post: a simple kingsflame flower from nine years ago with the caption Fireheart. He supposed that was where she garnered the name for her foundation. Gods above, she was incredible. A super-hero amongst ordinary women.

Rowan scrolled back towards the top of her instagram, all the way back to the most recent one. It was from their day downtown, when they had bought a piece of chocolate hazelnut cake and sat outside the bakery. Aelin was laughing around her thumb that she held between her teeth. At that moment, he had been teasing her about getting the frosting everywhere. Behind the camera he was smiling just as brilliantly as she was. The light in her eyes, her smile, the utter joy that radiated off of her… It was enough to make him breathless all over again.

“Fuck,” he murmured to himself, heart squeezing and soul dying at how absurdly beautiful she was. It didn’t seem fair. Everything about her was perfect. Not just outside, but inside, too. Aelin Galathynius was the most selfless and loving person he had ever met. Inside and out, she shone with the light of a thousand suns. It made it impossible to look away and broke his heart that he had driven her away so sharply.

“M’such a bloody dobber,” he mumbled, zooming in on her face as close as it would get, until she was little more than a monochromatic cluster of pixels, none of her features distinguishable.

The phone fumbled where he held it over his face, falling directly onto it. Rowan swore, the taste of metal blooming over his tongue where his tooth had cut through his lip. Worse than that, though, was when he noticed the giant heart that appeared in the center of the picture he’d been staring at.

Rowan had accidentally liked it. Just as quickly, he unliked it and tossed his phone to the other end of the couch. Jail. He needed to be in phone jail.

It had over ten thousand likes and three hundred comments. There was a chance she would never notice the notification appearing and disappearing. She might never notice. It didn’t stop the ice creeping into his veins, though. The idea that she would realize how utterly pathetic he was, as if all the texts weren’t indication enough.

Rowan swore violently under his breath and grabbed his phone again. With bleary, bloodshot eyes he opened their text thread to send off another message. Just as his fingers started their drunken dance over the letters once again, his phone began to ring loudly. The vibration shook him to his core as he beheld the name flashing on his screen, a photo of the two of them laying on her couch flashing in front of him. The sight of it knocked the wind out of him.

Aelin.

Fuck. Shit. Mala fucking fry him.

“Hello?” he said, breathless like he’d been running a marathon.

“Hi.” Aelin’s voice was quiet. Rowan could imagine her sitting in the middle of her couch, a tv show paused.

“I am so sorry, baby,” he began, letters and syllables stringing together with no space between. “I need to explain, to—”

“Did you just like that picture on my instagram?”

“I…” it was long and drawn out as he squinted at the ceiling, trying to find a way out of it. There wasn’t one. Heat crept up his neck and bloomed over his cheeks like rose petals. “Ye-yeah. That was me.”

“Are you drunk?” was her follow up question. On the other end of the phone it sounded like she was rolling over in bed. Gods, he would love to be wrapped up in bed with her. The expanse of her golden skin under his hands wasn’t beat out by anything, not even football.

“No,” was his quick response.

“You sound drunk.” It was impossible to tell what, exactly, her emotions were. Rowan swallowed thickly, setting the bottle on the coffee table and nudging it out of reach.

“I sound like a pathetic bastard that ruined something perfect.”

“You’re definitely drunk.” If Rowan wasn’t positive that she hated him, he might mistake her tone as amusement.

“I miss you. And I’m sorry,” he paused to hiccup, “And I want you to tell me what to do to fix what I’ve broken.” A heavy, resigned sigh came through the phone and Rowan froze.

“Start with sobering up–” Fuck. She was going to hang up, and he had blown his only chance at making things right. Shit.

“Don’t hang up,” Rowan pleaded, lip tucking between his bottom teeth while he waited for her to respond.

“Get some sleep and win your game tomorrow. After that… maybe we can talk.” If that was what it took, then yes. A thousand times yes he would do both of those things. Anything to get her to talk to him, anything so he could hold her, feel her lips on his skin, taste her and feel her beneath him.

“Do you promise?” A schoolyard thing to say, but he couldn’t help it. The gift of hearing her voice again after an entire week of deafening silence was the most beautiful thing he could ever imagine hearing. If he could, he’d bottle it up and get drunk off it. It was better than any alcohol, any drug.

“I promise,” she replied, and Rowan swore he heard a hint of laughter weaving between each letter of those two, simple words. That couldn’t be right, though. Aelin was mad at him. They wouldn’t be laughing together anytime soon.

“Okay.” It felt stupid to say, but it was the only word he could find.

“Okay.” Aelin’s voice was still soft and told him nothing of the status of his forgiveness, or if he needed to beg on his knees and worship her as penance. He would never, ever stop if that was what she required. “Goodnight, Rowan.”

The line went dead before he could say anything else and a new zap of determination electrified his blood. If she wanted a win, she would get it. But he had to get sober first.

With a pained groan, he pulled himself upright. A few deep breaths later the room wasn’t spinning quite so quickly and he was able to stumble to the kitchen. The smell of coffee made his nose wrinkle when he opened the bag. It quickly filled the space of the kitchen as he dumped the beans into the grinder, wincing at the shriek it made. Coffee and bread would help sober him up, and then he would focus on fluid intake to not be a useless sack of meat on the field tomorrow.

He leaned against his counter, ignoring incoming messages from his teammates checking on him, and shoved half a piece of bread into his mouth. A cold shower would wake him up, and tons of water and painkillers before bed would help the hangover tomorrow.

Anything Aelin wanted, he would give her. Starting tomorrow night by defeating the Adarlan Wyverns and handing it to her on a silver platter.

When he finally drifted off to sleep, his phone screen was still illuminated in his palm: that final photo he’d taken of her at the bakery wearing a smile just for him.

~*~

As soon as she took one step into the Neon Moon, she found Connall looking over at her with a healthy dose of surprise in his eyes. Aelin moved through the crowd that had gathered to watch the game, managing to snag a single barstool in front of the beer tap.

“Water, please,” she half-shouted over the loud voices filling the room. As soon as it was in her hands she took a long drink before placing it down on a napkin in front of her. “Hi.”

“Hi yourself.” A crooked grin spread across his face and he leaned forward on his forearms. “Watching the game?”

“Against my better judgment,” she sighed, ruffling her fingers through her hair. Now that she knew that he played for Doranelle, she just couldn’t miss it. Had she known from the get-go, there wouldn’t have been a single game that she missed. Even if it meant she’d be catching up on work during the short commercial breaks. “How much do you know?”

“Oh just… everything.”

Aelin groaned and looked up at the ceiling. She wasn’t upset that he’d told his friends, his support system. Rowan needed that, just like she did. Though she had yet to tell her family, she was going to do it soon. Maybe tomorrow or the day after. Some of the dust had to settle with Rowan first.

Though she was content to let him stew for a few more days, the single like she’d gotten from an account called actuallywhitethorn made her pick up the phone. A result of her doom-scrolling before bed, the notification had dropped from the top of her screen. By the time she clicked her notification icon, that particular like from that specific account was gone. It was like fate, she decided, for her to have seen it in its brevity. If he was miserable and pining enough to accidentally like an instagram picture, it wouldn’t hurt to call him. So she did.

At first, she didn’t know what to say, but as he talked it became more and more clear that he was very drunk. All his words had melded into one long syllable, and the fact that he was likely drinking away his feelings and problems had tugged at her heart. He really was adorable when he was drunk, calling her baby and trying his hardest to apologize, begging her not to hang up the phone. As much as she really did want to talk to him, it wasn’t a conversation to have while he was only half-aware. The apology she deserved needed to come from his sober lips, not drunk, loose ones.

After they hung up, Aelin had decided she would go to the bar to watch the game. It didn’t seem like a feat she could conquer at home alone on her couch. Even with Lysandra a phone call away, it felt too big to do on her own. The bar made sense.

“Congratulations?” Connall offered, and it was the first time she’d really picked up on any shyness or hesitancy from the man.

“Thank you.” It was still so new, so foreign. The racing of her thoughts hadn’t died down about it yet, her emotions didn’t have a full grasp on the situation. “How is he?”

“I think you already know the answer to that.” Kind of. If his texts were any inclination to his mental state, he was having a rough go of things at the moment. “Feels like a piece of shite.”

“Yeah, well.” That was a little deserved after what he’d said to her. Connall didn’t seem to disagree, merely shrugging as he followed her eyes to the television.

The game had been on for fifteen minutes, and Doranelle had scored one point. Adarlan had nothing. It was a bit of a feat to score so early on in the game, showing just how skilled Rowan and his teammates were. A camera zoomed in on the players, a towering, dark-haired man with a glove tucked under his arm, using the bottom of his shirt to wipe his face. Aelin’s eyes widened and her head whipped toward Connall when the spitting image of him appeared on the screen. The only difference was the color of the curls: Connall’s were black, his brother’s golden.

“You have a twin?” By way of answer, Connall merely winked and nodded back at the TV where Rowan had come into view. His uniform for home games was navy blue with white letters. Hands braced on his hips, he joined his teammates where they talked. It was only when he turned around that she saw how horrible he looked.

Though his skin was golden brown as ever, his face was ashen. Dark circles clung beneath his eyes and his bottom lip was swollen and scabbed over. The sweat gathering at his temples didn’t do anything at all to make him look well, if anything he just looked sicker.

“Whitethorn looks a bit… peaky,” Connall said cautiously, the corners of his lips tugging downward into a scowl.

“As drunk as he was when I called him last night, that makes perfect sense.” She was frowning, too. The most put together part of him was his hair, the single french braid down the center until it all met in a mess of a bun on the top of his head.

As soon as the whistle blew, he inhaled and exhaled a deep breath. That was when the cameras zoomed back out to take in the entire field, all the players getting into position. Aelin watched closely, one eye on the ball and the other always aware of where Rowan was in the frame.

For a while, it was a lot of passing back and forth, working up and down the field, the ball getting stolen one way or the other. Once, Adarlan got close to scoring but the goalie for Doranelle was quick to block it and pass it back down the field. Another of Rowan’s teammates was quick to get it back toward the Adarlan goal. It was passed back and forth between a few as they worked further and further down the pitch until a pass from Connall’s twin had the ball being juggled between Rowan’s feet.

Watching Rowan play brought back the old feelings she felt watching Aedion. Her competitive temper rose in her chest as he sprinted downfield with the ball between his feet. Somehow, he never tripped or stumbled. When he passed it off to a dark-haired man, Vaughan, Connall told her, it was with tricky footwork that he made look easy. Seconds later and a single pass back toward him, Rowan lunged from behind a crimson jersey. By some grace of the gods he managed to land the perfect kick that arched beautifully through the air. Adarlan’s goalie missed it by a fingertip.

The bar became deafening– some of them rooting for Doranelle, others wanting them to lose for the sake of Varese’s team. On the TV, Rowan’s teammates pulled him off the ground and jostled him amongst them, Connall’s golden-haired brother smacking a kiss to Rowan’s sweaty forehead.

If Aelin didn’t know any better, she would say his teammates were being a little more gentle with him than they might be otherwise. Rowan’s jaw remained clenched tightly, that muscle feathering as he nodded to the only person on the team that was taller than him where he stood down the field.

“Who is their goalie?”

“Lorcan Salvaterre. Team captain and one of Rowan’s closest friends. My twin’s name is Fenrys.” Aelin nodded and rested her chin on her hands as the next play started, polished blue nails digging into her palms. She knew of most of these names from Aedion’s soccer days and the afternoons at her parents house where her father prattled on about different team rosters.

The minutes ticked by, Rowan fiercely focused on the game. That look of sheer determination never left his eyes, even in the brief moments of reprieve he had to gather his wits. Whenever he could, Connall hovered near her for the moral support she’d come in search of. It meant more to her than she could ever put into words. Being in a new city, far away from her support system, with no one else to lean on? It was really nice to know he was there. Even if they barely knew each other.

When Adarlan scored, Aelin had over half the pub groaned. The Doranelle players looked beyond pissed. Rowan and Lorcan shared matching expressions, both of their jaws grinding as they shook their heads before getting back into position.

It led them into more volleying back and forth, the ball little more than a blur between feet. And then it was back in Rowan’s possession. It was like the wind sang for him, pushing him faster as he bolted down the field. Almost as soon as he made his goal, the one that would get them a point ahead though, a whistle blew and a yellow-checkered flag was waving.

“Shit,” she murmured, closely eyeing the playback. It was a fair call, he had been offside. When the camera showed Rowan again though, he was pointed at the goal, mouth wrapping around words that looked a lot like fucking bullshit. The words weren��t more than a whisper as she said, “Rowan, you stupid idiot.”

Connall chuckled, despite the dire situation at hand. She knew he was only laughing at her, not his friend’s situation. Still, she wadded up a napkin and threw it at his head. It nailed him in the temple.

“It’s not funny,” she hissed, nibbling on the end of her straw, a sick feeling roiling in her gut.

The referee pulled a yellow card brandishing it in front of his face. A spark of anger flickered behind his eyes, mouth opening to spew something else when Fenrys grabbed him by the shoulders and made him turn away. Aelin exhaled a tight breath as Rowan shook his head on screen. Fenrys said something in Rowan’s ear and he nodded, lips thin in a stiff line.. It was enough to make him nod and hustle to his spot on the field, shaking his arms out when he came to a stop.

Beneath the bar, Aelin’s legs were bouncing. Butterflies flitted their way through her insides enough that she braced her hands against her stomach as though it would calm them. It was impossible to look away as Adarlan took their free kick from the offside, launching the ball halfway down the field and into another frustrating back and forth between the two teams.

This was always the part of the sport that Aelin hated. No, perhaps hated was too strong of a word. The build up always made her feel nauseous, waiting for one team to make one quick move to kick everyone into high gear to avoid a goal or make one. Being pregnant, it was worse. It felt as though her stomach was in the back of her throat.

Just before the end of the second half, disaster struck. Aelin saw it coming. She was pretty sure everyone watching at home or in the stands did, too. Connall swore filthily as Rowan ran for the ball and dove feet first to knock it away from Adarlan. Except in the process, his cleats clashed into the other player’s feet and they both went down in a heap on the field.

“What the fuck did you say to him?” Connall asked over his shoulder, never taking his eyes off the screen as a ref jogged across the pitch.

“I told him to win and maybe we would talk! I didn’t tell him to–” A yellow card appeared in the ref’s hand, followed by a red one and Aelin lost all of her words. Both were for Rowan.

“I think he took that a little too do or die.” And so it seemed he had.

Distantly, she heard the announcer saying it was the first time he’d ever been red carded in his entire career. The patron’s of the bar murmured amongst themselves, many of them asking what the hell was wrong with Whitethorn tonight.

The cameras zoomed in to where he walked off the field, sweat trickling down his face. Their coach followed him to the end of the field, the words he muttered only for Rowan to hear. Though he looked ready to hit anyone that was close enough, Rowan simply nodded. Fenrys caught his arm just before he walked off, mouth moving too quickly for Aelin to decipher.

The last clear shot of him was walking into the tunnel and off the pitch, body rigid and muscles rippling while he pulled his jersey off his body.

“I… I need to go,” Aelin said to Connall, who only nodded in response. She threw a few bills on the counter as a thank you and pushed her way out of the pub, walking as fast as her feet would carry her to her rental car down the street.

~*~

Even though his team had another win under their belt by the time the game was over, it had been a fucking disaster. Rowan watched the second half on his phone from the comfort of his car after getting kicked out.

It was the first time in his eleven year career he’d ever received two yellow cards, and consequently a red card, and been ejected from a game. All that anger and frustration from the week, from his hangover, had boiled to a head and exploded on the field. Next week he would have to sit out, too.

Failing his teammates didn’t sit right with him. Lorcan was probably fuming and Rowan anticipated a less than friendly visit from him tomorrow. Coach Malakai was mad, too. The last thing he told Rowan was to get his shit together before practice on Monday. Only Fenrys, who never missed a chance to be a jokester about anything, had murmured words of encouragement before he left the field.

By the time he pulled into his driveway, he was exhausted. His entire body ached from that last dive. There would definitely be bruises on his hips and thighs tomorrow from the way Ress Taylor landed on top of him. All he wanted to do was let his muscles thaw under a shower so hot it burned. A glass of whiskey would be great, too. Not that he deserved it after his performance on the pitch.

The game was… rough.The entire day was rough. From the time he’d woken up his mood had been in the pits of hell. Drunk Rowan hadn’t been able to piece together what Aelin said just before they hung up, but sober Rowan did as soon as his alarm sounded.

Win your game tomorrow.

Not win the game, like she used to say when she thought he was the coach. She didn’t ask him to wish the boys good luck like she had in the weeks prior. The words had changed. Win your game. The game he would be playing in, that belonged to him. She had given him a personal goal and though he helped his team achieve it, he still felt like he failed. Especially since he would have to sit out next week, too, because of the red card.

It had been stupid of him to think she wouldn’t find out the truth before he had the chance to tell her. Everything had just gone to such absolute shit before he had the chance. Rowan Whitethorn would be groveling at the feet of Aelin Galathynius for the duration of his life, and then some more after he crossed into whatever afterworld awaited him.

The news of his career was just another lie he had to make right. All day it sat with him, festering like an open wound. It wasn’t that he suddenly felt bitter about his job. He didn’t. Rowan loved what he did, he loved the sport. It was his greatest passion and love in life. But Aelin deserved to hear about it from him. Not knowing how she found out only made it worse, until everything he felt was bleeding out into the astroturf beneath his feet and getting him thrown out of a game.

Upon pulling into his driveway, something white in front of his house caught his eye. His heart came to a stop as soon as his car did. Rowan didn’t even bother to pull into his garage, just parked beside the white SUV and stared at his porch. It felt like a fever dream, getting home from a hard game and seeing Aelin on his porch swing. The wind slowly moved her back and forth, but when she saw him step out of the car she stood, hands sliding into her back pockets.

“I told you to win, not get a red card before the second half was up.” The lilting tone of her voice made his knees buckle. It forced him to gather himself before approaching, slowly walking up the stairs until he stood one below her.

“My mouth keeps getting me in trouble this week, it seems,” he said back, mouth completely dry. It was an effort to make his tongue form the words with his lips. “But it got you to my house, so I suppose there are worse things that could have happened.”

“Few things are worse than a red card.”

“Not talking to you might beat out all of them,” he said smoothly, fingers sliding along each of his keys until he found the one for his front door. He held it up between two fingers and Aelin nodded, stepping to the side and gesturing toward the door.

She wore simple leggings and an oversized t-shirt, a pair of socks and slides on her feet. Though she wore no makeup and her hair was twisted half-hazardly onto the top of her head, she had never looked so beautiful. Lorcan would laugh himself hoarse if he heard the thoughts Rowan had about this woman, yet he didn’t care. Even in her most dressed down and casual state, she was breathtaking.

He led her inside, locking the door behind them. It was late enough he assumed she would be staying for a while. Few people made a nearly two hour drive to turn around and leave upon arrival. Then again, he hadn’t seen last weekend going that way, either, and it’s exactly how that night ended.

“You played…”

“Shittily,” he offered, hanging his keys on a small hook by the front door.

“Brutally,” Aelin amended, slipping off her shoes and heading to the kitchen. Rowan watched as she grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge and handed one off to him before heading for the couch. “Have you eaten?”

“No. Have you?”

“Not since lunch.” Phone in hand, she curled up in the corner and pulled a blanket over her lap. “I doubt we have any notable options, but Taco Bell is open and is shockingly one of the few things not making me sick at the moment.”

Rowan watched her from where he stood in the center of the room. It didn’t feel real. None of today did, really. It could be the hangover talking, but the day felt like a horrible dream. He was scared to move, scared that if he sat on the couch with her that she would vanish into nothing and he would wake up alone in his bed.

“Are you going to just stand there all night?” Her eyes didn’t leave her phone while presumably selecting everything she wanted to eat, eyes narrowing at the screen briefly in thought. A moment later she held it out for him. Rowan stared at her, heart thundering away in his chest. “Rowan.”

“Right. Thank you,” he murmured, taking the phone and trying not to acknowledge the rush he felt when his fingertips grazed her palm. Not big on fast food most of the time, it took him a little longer to pick his dinner. “What do I owe you?”

Aelin just snorted as she submitted the order, eyes rolling slightly before placing her phone face down on the couch next to her, head tilting as she said, “Come to think of it, maybe you do. I think your twenty dollar fast food order might do me in completely. I’ll have to take out a loan.”

“I can Venmo it,” Rowan said dumbly, reaching for the phone in his back pocket.

“I don’t need your money any more than you need mine.” Once there might have been a teasing edge to her voice. Her delivery was much drier than he was used to from her. But there it was. That stupid thing he’d said before he could stop himself, the words that brought everything they were building crashing down.

“Sit,” she told him, patting the cushion next to her. Rowan was careful to leave plenty of space between them. There were definitely lines and boundaries now. The risk of getting ensnared in one was too great and he had a lot of apologies to make. With his arms elbows braced on his knees and hands clasped loosely between them, he stared at the floor.

“You’re actually getting a pretty sweet deal.” Aelin sighed, shifting so she was facing him full on. His green eyes didn’t leave the rug. “According to google my net worth is two-and-a-half times what yours is. Isn’t that crazy?”

“I didn’t know,” he finally said. As much as he wanted to look at her, he couldn’t. He was a fucking coward. Guilt was a disgusting, oily thing crawling beneath his skin. It threatened to consume him whole even worse now that he was talking to her than it had the rest of the week.

Aelin sighed again, finally pulling his attention to her face. She laid her head back against the sofa and a few tendrils of hair fell down to frame her face. Rowan’s fingers curled into fists to fight the urge to sweep them behind her ear. She must have sensed it because she did it herself. The blue of her fingernails was the same blue as his jersey. Part of him wondered if it had been on purpose.

“I think tonight we can call a truce.” Aelin seemed to notice his gaze on her fingers because she folded her arms over her chest, curling her hands so her blue nails were hidden. “We’ll eat, sleep, and then tomorrow… Tomorrow we’ll talk.”

“Okay,” he agreed. The word was falling off his tongue as soon as she finished speaking. Her cheeks seemed to twitch with amusement, and if he had reacted differently last week she would probably be smiling.

“I am curious, though. Did you make an instagram for the sole purpose of stalking me?”

Rowan cringed. His eyes squeezed shut, lips rolling between his teeth as he looked away. Beside him it sounded like Aelin laughing, though it was little more than puffs of air coming out of her nose. It would have been easy to go on the defensive, to add one more lie to their crumpled house of cards. Instead, he went with the truth.

“I missed you. I just wanted to see your face.” He looked back over at her then, but it was she who looked away now. Her eyes were glassy, the dim lighting making the unshed tears in her eyes sparkle. “Shit. I’m sorry.”

“It’s these fucking hormones.” She dismissed him with a wave of her hand when he started to reach for her. It stung more than he would ever let on, but he retreated and dropped his hand into his lap while she used the collar of her shirt to dry her eyes.

It was silent after that, the two of them alternating from staring at nothing to sneaking glances at the other. Rowan only knew because he caught her staring at him more than once when he thought he could take a second to drink her in. It was only when the doorbell finally rang and he stood that she said his name, stopping him when he was halfway to the front door. Turning to look at her, eyebrows raised in question, he watched her lick her lips.

“I missed you, too.” It was barely a whisper, spoken so softly he might have dreamed it if he was any more tired.

Still, it was enough to get him through the rest of their silent night. Enough that it didn’t hurt as much as he thought it would when he insisted she sleep in his bed without him. Enough to chase him with sweet dreams when he finally slipped into the guest room down the hall and tumbled into a deep sleep.

@elentiyawhitethorn @autumnbabylon @fancysludgeshoelamp @wordsafterhours @live-the-fangirl-life @the-hospitality-of-knives @tangledraysofsunshine @readandlisten @westofmoon @rowanaelinn @morganofthewildfire @writtenonreceipts @feynightlight @emster1622-blog @scarblx @thefaetrove @loveyatopluto @actuallybarb @peppermint-fae @the-devils-own @scottmcgivemeacall @livingmylifeforme @wordsafterhours @foreverfallingforthestars @llyncooljones @emily-gsh @loosesimplicity @emilyrose111294 @charlizeed @aelinchocolatelover @cretaceous-therapod @sayosdreams @fireheart-violet @the-regal-warrior @backtobl4ck @shyvioletcat @mariamuses

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shyvioletcat · 1 year ago

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Set Up - Part 6

A/N: Well, well, well... here we are again. I won't ramble, but let's thank Rowaelin Month and @rowaelinscourt for prompting the completion of this chapter. BUT PLEASE NOTE TAGS ARE NOT WORKING

CW: Mild swearing and smut, of course

~ Set Up Masterlist ~

~~~~~

This time being apart felt different. Maybe seeing so much of each other had ruined what had been enjoying in such a carefree way for so long. Now, whenever Aelin thought of Rowan something twisted in her chest. That week brought them closer than they’d been in a long time and highlighted some things Aelin was missing in her life.

A boyfriend was the simplest way to put it, delving further would only lead to questions Aelin did not want to answer. She was being dramatic, due to her recent bout of being alone no doubt. Spending all that time together had left her spoiled and craving more. Rowan wasn’t the answer and not a consolation for her loneliness. He deserved better than that, better than her. He’d always talked about wanting a perfect little life, with a family and white picket fence to boot. Aelin couldn’t give him that. Their lives had split down two different paths that only crossed whenever fate was kind. For all parties involved it was the best way to leave. It was just fortunate that they had been found out.

Aelin had spent nearly a month screening her calls and messages from nearly everyone outside of work. Even though she had explicitly told her mother she didn’t want to talk about the situation between her and Rowan, Evalin Ashryver Galathynius was never one to give up. The innocent calls and texts that asked about work and how Aelin was doing always seemed to take a turn in his direction. It had got to the point that she just completely ignored any mention of relationship related things. Even her dad who tended to keep neutral ground had dropped a few hints here and there.

By far Aedion was the worst, mainly because he had gone and opened his fat mouth and blabbed to Lysandra about what he had seen. Her best friend turned cousin’s girlfriend had been begging for details, some of the obscene kind. Aelin had given over a few, just to placate her but then refused anymore. The more information she gave, the more likely it was to be used against her.

The hardest contact to filter through had been Rowan’s. There had been an obvious shift when it came to him and it was confusing to say the least. Aelin didn’t know if it was because they had been found out or if there had been a change in their dynamic, or if it was as simple as her missing him. Whatever it was, Aelin found herself pulling away. Rowan’s texts weren’t anything out of the ordinary. He sent through casual enquiries about how she was doing, frustrations about work and funny pictures to make her laugh. Aelin wasn’t replying as much as she usually did, but hopefully Rowan didn’t notice. He didn’t deserve to suffer for whatever was going on in Aelin’s head.

What had heightened every uncomfortable aspect was that work had been godsdamned awful. They had launched into planning the peak event season and everyone was working their asses off trying to come up with fresh ideas for the companies who employed them. Aelin was exhausted and left with very little brain power once she left work. She was drained and didn’t need work fraying the remaining threads of her personal life.

Aelin was in the middle of decompressing, sprawled out on her bed and eating an unhealthy amount of chocolate. Since arriving home maybe half an hour ago she had steadily paced herself and only eaten half a block while she mindlessly scrolled through videos on social media. If cute animals and spicy book snippets hadn’t been there to distract her she might have downed the entire thing by now and felt sick for her reckless efforts. When a call for a video chat flashed up on her screen Aelin nearly dropped her phone right on her face.

Once the risk of injury was removed Aelin registered who was calling. It was Elide, someone who wouldn’t be full of prying questions which was a welcome relief. Aelin hit the accept button before it rang out.

“Hello, hello,” Aelin said, trying to sound cheerful but it didn’t quite get there.

“Good evening, I need your help.” Trust Elide to cut straight to the point.

“With what?” With her interest piqued, Aelin sat up.

“I have a date and I don’t know what to wear,” Elide said.

“Ah, okay. Show me your options.”

This was a common occurrence and Aelin waited as Elide set her phone up to get a full body angle. She disappeared from the frame for a moment before returning, dressed in a fluffy robe and holding three outfits on coat hangers.

“Option one,” Elide held up a knee length, dark purple dress to her body. “Two.” The second dress was all black and form fitting. It was one of Elide’s riskier outfits and she almost hadn’t bought it, and it took both Aelin and Lysandra insisting she looked drop dead gorgeous in it for her to buy it. “And three.” Dress three was in light blue with a fitted bodice and puffy sleeves.

“Okay, these are three completely different vibes. What are we actually going for?” Aelin asked.

With a heavy sigh, Elide sank onto her bed. “I don’t know.”

She tried the pragmatic approach. “Well, what are you doing?”

“Dinner first, and then we’re going to the movies. But the fancy ones with the recliners,” Elide explained.

“Option two is out because half the night he won’t even be able to see it and it’s a waste of an outfit,” Aelin said.

“But I look so good in it,” Elide protested.

“Yes, that’s why it’s worth saving,” Aelin rebutted.

“Okay, you’re right. So, purple or blue?” Elide held up the remaining options.

Aelin thought for a moment, eyes darting between the two dresses. “Purple. The blue is a little short and you don't want that scratchy fabric on your thighs.”

“Gods, you’re right,” Elide said. “This is why we’re friends.”

Aelin laughed. “The only reason. So, who is this hot date?”

At this distance from the camera it was hard to tell but Aelin could have sworn Elide blushed. “We’ll see how this date goes and then I’ll tell you.”

“Elide Lochan, a woman of mystery,” Aelin teased.

“Stay on while I get dressed,” Elide said, disappearing from view. “We haven’t caught up in a hot minute.”

“We haven’t.” The air left Aelin’s lungs as she heavily flopped down on the bed. “I’ve been so busy with work and stuff I just feel like I have no time.”

“Aw, sweetie. That sounds like no fun at all,” Elide’s voice was full of sympathy.

Aelin left out the constant badgering of her family and the extra weight that was adding to everything, and also the weird sense of loneliness she hadn’t felt since she had first moved to Rifthold. Those were things she didn’t want her overly perceptive friend’s commentary on.

“You’ll have to have enough fun for the two of us,” Aelin said. She was about to complain about work some more when a message popped up at the top of her screen. Her heart skipped, or maybe it was her stomach, it happened so suddenly Aelin couldn’t determine which part of her body was doing summersaults. The text was short and succinct, and so perfectly Rowan.

>> I’m coming to Rifthold this weekend. See you then.

He would be in her city, in less than 48 hours. Like always, there was no question of whether or not they would see each other. They had been at this for so long it was presumed without question for them to meet up and do what they did best. A text like this usually led to excitement and thrilling anticipation, and that was there. Except this time there was a little bit of trepidation sneaking in as well.

“What’s that face?” Elide’s question cut through Aelin’s thoughts.

“Huh?”

Elide’s face took up the screen, a dark brow raised in question. “The face you’re making right now. What’s that about?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” Aelin tried to assure her.

“Spill, Aelin,” Eldie demanded.

Aelin considered the benefits of divulging just a little bit to Elide. It might just relieve a little bit of pressure that keeping all this to herself was building up. She didn’t have to admit to what she and Rowan got up to, maybe she could just circle around the set up they’d been subjected to.

“I just got a message from Rowan,” Aelin said. “He’s coming this weekend.”

“Oh, good,” Elide sounded downright gleeful. “Maybe getting laid will help with some stress relief.”

Aelin laughed until she realised what her friend had said. “What?”

“Work won’t seem like the worst thing in the world while Rowan is blowing—’’

Aelin shot straight up. “Wait, you know? How? Who told you?”

Dark eyes stared through the screen. “You’re not as subtle as you think you are. No one told, I just found it really weird that at the bar Rowan came back from the bathrooms with a massive hard-on and you followed after him two seconds later.”

“I…” for a moment Aelin was at a loss for words. “You couldn’t have seen that.”

“True,” Elide said with a shrug. “But his face certainly looked like he had one.”

Aelin wanted to bury her face in her pillow. “Who else noticed?”

“Our friends, bar myself, are not as observant as you’re giving them credit for,” Elide assured her. “I was going to wait for you to tell me, but I jumped the gun because that look on your face doesn’t look like pure excitement.”

“It’s complicated,” Aelin admitted.

Elide scoffed. “Yeah, banging your best friend usually is.”

“It was all fine and dandy until this last trip, we saw each other way more than we usually do and our mothers very insistently tried to set us up on more than one occasion. So things were different, and I don’t know… I think I miss him. More than any other time before.”

That was it, she missed him, that’s all there was to it. Saying it aloud solidified the thought in her mind. The hesitation came from the fact this visit was happening so soon. Usually it was months before they saw each other, their travelling for work between cities wasn't frequent. Too much time together on this last trip was to blame for everything. There were too many heightened emotions and now they were lingering and causing trouble. Why couldn’t they just keep things as they were? Simple, easy, no pesky strings attached.

“So…” Elide hedged, “you’ll be telling him no this time?”

Aelin considered it for a moment. She could just say she already had plans because it was so last minute. That would give her the distance that she probably needed to start thinking clearly again. But with Rowan in the same city, could she really bring herself to stay away?

“No, I’ll see him,” Aelin decided. “It would be weird if I didn’t. And you’re right, maybe a little bit of recreational sexual activities will help with the stress.”

“And you’ll stop missing him,” Elide added. “For the time being, at least.”

Aelin nodded. “True. Well, I won’t keep you from your date any longer, but I want you to know I’m slightly insulted that you won’t tell me who it is.”

“You’ll get over it. I love you,” Elide said in that brutally succinct way of hers.

“I love you too,” Aelin said through her laughter. “Have fun.”

They both said a final goodbye and Aelin hung up. A new feeling of clarity settled over her. All this turmoil over Rowan was pointless. All it really came down to was that during their last set of rendezvous Aelin had been spoiled for company and now she was just dealing with going without. She was overreacting and she blamed work and meddlesome relatives not giving her a moment’s peace. Work she couldn’t do much about besides just getting it done. But she’d be having words with her mother about how butting into her love life was well and truly off the table. Especially if it was going to do a number on brain like this, not if it was going to ruin the friendship she valued most. What she and Rowan had was perfect the way it was—it was exactly what the two of them needed. It was up to Aelin to ignore everything else to keep it that way.

~~~~~

Rowan was a desperate man. He had hounded his boss from the moment Aelin left for some opportunity to be sent to Rifthold. He was knocked back so many times that he’d been trawling through commissions himself to find just the slightest excuse. When he got the call that one of the museums in Rifthold they worked with needed a consult Rowan was thrown the job out of pity. Or maybe it was to get him to shut up.

In the end, Rowan couldn’t care less. He was going Orynth, and he was so caught up on the fact that he would be seeing Aelin again that work hardly mattered to him. Aelin was all he cared about. Telling her how he felt was more important than an upgrade to the mediaeval wing of the museum.

Nearly every night since she’d left he had to talk himself down from booking his own ticket and flying out. That wasn’t the way they did things and Rowan had no idea what Aelin felt. if he showed up out of the blue there was a decent chance he would scare her or himself off. As tempted as he was to make some big grand gesture, there was too much history between them for that kind of action. There were obstacles and things they would need to sort out before they moved forward, none of which would be easily overcome. Their situation was complicated, and complicated required caution. Rowan had to convince himself more than once that keeping it business as usual was the best choice.

All those semi sleepless nights didn’t matter now, because at this very moment he was checking into his hotel room. It was late Friday evening, the trip was so sudden that he had to leave after work. Rowan would spend Saturday meeting with whoever it was at the museum he needed and then he would be able to see Aelin. His lack of focus was a serious indicator for how flippant he’d become over this particular job. Any other time he’d have the client’s names memorised, would have gone over his notes and designs a hundred times. Instead he’d spent most of his time looking at his phone waiting to see what Aelin had to say.

She’d agreed to meet up but had let him know that work had been insane and things might be a little up in the air. Rowan didn’t mind in the slightest. All that mattered was talking to Aelin and he was determined that this would be the trip to do it. There was no more wasted time, he was in love with her and it was as simple as that.

The daylight hours of Saturday were all but meaningless. Rowan managed to keep himself professional for when he needed to and presented his plans without flourish. After that he returned to his room and became no better than a teenager—phone in hand and eyes glued to it. He tried not to get too disappointed every time that Aelin pushed back their meet up time to a little later. At first they were meant to meet before dinner, and then it was for dinner. Rowan was about to leave for the restaurant when a text came in with a heartfelt apology from Aelin saying that she wouldn’t make it. His heart had stopped in his chest because he thought she was cancelling altogether, but she finished off with a promise she’d come to him and to just send her the address.

Rowan had done exactly that and ordered in. He tried to watch TV while he waited. The channels were limited and he couldn’t be bothered to go through the whole process of logging into a streaming service, so he just let a renovation show play while he ran through everything he needed to say to Aelin. He debated back and forth over the merits of starting with I love you and going from there. This current round he was against it, a case of too much too soon. There was still the unanswered question of how Aelin felt and that was what the axis of his entire future existence spun on.

And then finally there was a knock on his door.

Launching would be the best way to describe Rowan’s departure from the bed. It was a single room accommodation, with a bed, desk and small attached bathroom, so it was only a matter of seconds until he had his hand on the door handle. Rowan took in one deep breath to ready himself, swinging the door open and he found her.

Aelin stood there, a tired smile on her face and still dressed in her work clothes. She had a large bag over her shoulder that most likely contained clothes for the night. As Rowan looked at her now, taking in every inch of her, he wondered how he had been able to suppress his feelings for so long.

“You gonna let me in, hotshot?” Aelin asked, a hand rising to her hip. “Or am I booking my own room?”

“Yeah, sorry.” Rowan stepped aside, hoping he didn’t come across as awkward as he suddenly felt.

Aelin gave him a look like she might be questioning his sanity before walking into his room. Rowan shut the door behind her and withheld the need to hold her—to kiss her senseless and confess every little thing that had built up over these weeks apart. She stopped by the little table, picking at his leftover pizza.

“Do you mind if I use your shower? I feel a little gross after such a long day,” Aelin said, chewing over a piece of pepperoni.

“Of course,” Rowan said, gesturing at the bathroom door.

Aelin disappeared a moment later and once again Rowan had to wait. The buzz of the shower added to the sounds of the TV, and he didn’t bother to change the volume. He didn’t care about the clashing wallpaper or bedding choices. Rowan just lay back on the bed, staring at the ceiling fan. Last time he’d seen one of these in a hotel room his pants had ended hanging over it. He didn’t know whether he should be hoping for a repeat performance or not.

The shower shut off and Rowan’s body thrummed with anticipation. Soon enough Aelin would be here, in his arms, and he could admit to how he felt. They could talk and they would figure out some way to make their situation work. The door creaked open after what seemed like a lifetime and Rowan sat up. Aelin stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in an oversized t-shirt with her damp hair loose around her shoulders. She’d washed off all her make-up, but she wasn’t any less beautiful.

“Work has been the worst,” Aelin nearly groaned, heading to the minibar and pulling out a bottle of beer. “I know this will cost you like $50 so I’ll pay you back.”

“It’s fine,” Rowan said, he’d give her just about anything right now if she asked for it.

Aelin took a few decent mouthfuls then left it on the table along with the pizza. Then she stalked over to him, stopping right in between his knees. Her hands rested on his shoulders, fingers playing with the ends of his hair.

“Aelin,” it felt so good to just say her name, to see her face soften just the slightest when he did. “There’s something I wanted to talk to you about.”

Rowan’s breath caught as Aelin brought her body flush against his. The fingers in his hair tightened, angling his face upwards so he could watch her whisper, “I don’t want to talk.”

She kissed him and Rowan could never deny her. After what must have been a hellish day this is what Aelin needed from him. To be touched and made to forget about the world outside this hotel room. Rowan could give her that—gladly. And he just told himself the same thing he’d been repeating over the last few weeks. He could wait a little longer.

~~~~

Rowan’s lips were soft as they met her’s, and Aelin sighed at the feeling that swept through her body. His hands were a steadying and familiar weight on her waist. Sometimes it was a shock as to how big they were, it took her a moment to remember just how much of her they could touch at once. Those hands that were always gentle, always making her feel cherished in every caress, that was no different as he pulled her down into his lap. Aelin straddled his hips, thighs tightening as she felt him through his sweatpants. It was flattering that only a few kisses and fleeting touches were all it took for him to be so hard and ready for her. She was almost impatient enough to tug his sweatpants down to free his cock, riding him hard and fast. But then it would be over too soon and Aelin might just be too tired for another round. So, instead she’d let him draw this out like he’d like to do to make every moment count.

This was exactly what she needed, a wonderful, all consuming distraction.

She whimpered as Rowan’s grip flexed on her waist, and then again when his hands travelled lower. In her overnight bag in the bathroom there was a nice little set she had planned on wearing but after a long soothing shower the idea was just too uncomfortable. So she’d gone without and as Rowan’s fingers dipped under the hem of her t-shirt he was about to discover how little she actually wore.

“Aelin,” he groaned as the pass over her hips revealed no trace of underwear. “You’re… I’ll never be able to explain it.”

He was rambling, and that was sweet, flattering even. But it wasn't nearly enough by a long shot. Aelin ground down on the hard length of him, using actions rather than words to beg for what she needed. Rowan got the hint. Holding her thighs he changed their positions, laying her softly down on the bed. They worked in sync, taking turns to remove each other’s clothes. Aelin ran her hands over exposed and heated skin, tracing over dips and curves she had memorised so many times before.

“Touch me, Rowan,” Aelin said in between kisses.

Rowan didn’t answer, he only pushed up enough so that he could run a hand down her body right to the middle of her thighs. Aelin gasped as he teased her with sweeping passes of a knuckle over her centre, making her buck and writhe until his thumb pressed down on her clit. Her moan was next to nothing with Rowan’s mouth on her’s, only muffled and needy sounds escaped as they were smothered by kisses.

Their first round after being apart was always frenzied, desperation dictating their actions. Aelin expected the same, but this wasn’t. Rowan was slow and thorough, with his lips and his fingers—it was a delicious kind of torture. One finger, and then a second, slipped into her while his thumb drew unhurried circles around her clit. Heat flooded Aelin’s cheeks as her body reacted to the touches that were both too much and not enough. He was keeping her right on the edge, waves of pleasure cresting but never breaking.

When he did it again, her body tensed as it prepared to let go and Rowan stole it away, had Aelin nearly sobbed out of frustration. “Please, Rowan.”

Rowan kissed her lips, tongue sweeping into her mouth for a dirty kiss. “Please what, Aelin?”

There was a hint of sass to his voice, and by the gods did Aelin rise to the challenge. She hooked a knee over his hip, urging him down so their bodies were flush. When she returned the favour of a kiss she made sure to bite at his bottom lip. “Fuck me, Rowan.”

He didn’t need much more convincing than that. Moving his hand and with a subtle shift of his hips Rowan pushed in, taking his time. Aelin’s hips rolled, coaxing him deeper.

“You feel so perfect.” Rowan sounded relieved and a little overwhelmed. “Every time.”

He cursed colourfully as he pressed his face into the crook of her neck. Aelin couldn’t help it, she laughed, her reward was a bite—right where the juncture of her shoulder and neck. It had her moaning and arching into him. Rowan knew exactly where her buttons were and now she was panting with desperation for him to do something. Anything.

Rowan didn’t make her wait, a hand high on her thigh kept her in place as he began thrusting. The angle of his cock was perfect, as it always was, and it led Aelin right into her greatest wish of the night. A beautiful distraction. Everything was Rowan, she was consumed by him. Their bodies moved synchronically, both wanting to give as much as the other. A hand that was not her own found Aelin’s breast, fingers rolling the hardened peak.

“That’s it,” Rowan whispered into her ear, the softness of his voice raising goosebumps over her skin and heightening every sensation. “You want to come. You deserve it.”

That little bit of encouragement was all she needed. Aelin broke, pleasure overtaking every sense in her body. Rowan pressed soft kisses to the length on her neck and face. His hips kept moving, drawing out her orgasm as long as he could. After a few long, bliss filled moments Aelin’s awareness returned to her.

“So beautiful,” Rowan all but hummed as his gaze swept over her, his next thrust sharper.

She could feel that Rowan was close, so she guided his face back to her and kissed him. Rowan groaned, losing his rhythm but it still felt just as good, so much so Aelin could feel herself building up again. He pulled back enough to look at her face. Their eyes connected, Rowan’s green gaze holding an intensity that had Aelin flushing with something closer to embarrassment than desire. The eye contact—it was too much. There was something there she hadn’t seen before. Her brain was far too distracted to decipher it so she went with the easiest option to cope.

“Gods, Rowan,” Aelin breathed, eyes fluttering shut, refocusing on how he felt on every inch of her skin.

“Open your eyes, love,” Rowan urged. He gave her a sweet kiss for extra encouragement.

So caught up in him, Aelin couldn’t help but do as he asked. What she saw when she looked up at him had her heart pounding in her chest, a new wave of need crashing over her. It tipped her over the edge again, her body tightening before her core pulsed, bringing Rowan right along with her. He moaned deeply, the vibrations of it thrumming over her sensitive skin. Aelin clung to Rowan, waiting for her breathing to even out and sense to settle in her brain. She didn’t think she’d ever tire of sex with Rowan, nothing else even came close.

He had his forehead resting on her collarbone, just as wrecked as she was. Lips dragged over her skin and his next words were whispered right over her heart. “I love you,”

Aelin’s breath caught and those words registered in her blissed out brain, sobering her instantly. But it seemed Rowan hadn’t even noticed what he said, he just rolled to the side, letting Aelin escape to the bathroom. Her heart was pounding so hard in her chest that she felt it in her throat, making her want to vomit. Aelin held back the impulse and cleaned up as quickly as she could. Diving into the overnight bag she had conveniently left in here after the shower Aelin pulled out clothes to put on. It was just an oversized sweater and leggings, but it would be enough to get her to her car.

Because she couldn’t stay here, not now that Rowan had gone and ruined everything. The easiest option was for her to leave, and quickly. If she stayed there might not be anything left of their relationship to salvage. Missing him was one thing, and then there was this.

This was not what they were, they couldn’t be. It didn’t make sense. Why did Rowan have to go and ruin a perfectly good thing?

I love you.

Those three words echoed in her brain and did nothing to console her. Rowan couldn’t love her, she wasn’t what he needed or wanted. Not really. If he had the sense to really consider it he would know this wasn’t the right course for them. Aelin would give him the opportunity to do just that. She packed up the rest of her bag, so all she had to do was grab her purse and shoes and leave.

Swallowing down against the tightness in her throat, Aelin opened the door and swept out with the shortest of glances in Rowan’s direction. He was splayed out on the bed looking like he was still recovering after the mind blowing sex. Aelin’s stomach gave a pang of regret when she realised this would be the last time. It would be cruel to put Rowan through any more of this when she didn’t feel the same.

Aelin gathering up her things seemed to shake him from his daze and he raised himself up on his elbow. “What are you doing?”

She snatched up her purse and stepped around the table. “Leaving.”

“Why…” Rowan trailed off, then realisation dawned on him. “Aelin, wait. Don’t go, let me explain.”

“There’s no need,” Aelin said, slipping a foot into her kitten heel. Rowan went to get out of bed but she stopped him with a raised hand. “Don’t. Just stay there.”

Gods bless him, he did. She could always count on Rowan to respect boundaries.

“Stay, and we’ll talk,” Rowan nearly pleaded.

“We’re friends, Rowan,” Aelin said, forcing every ounce of bravado into as she could. She even added a strained note of laughter. “That’s all we are and can be.”

“Friends don’t do this.”

Aelin’s head snapped up, it was all too easy to read the look of hurt and disappointment on his face. It wasn’t clear if he was talking about her behaviour in this moment or the casual fucking that they’d indulged in over the years, ending in the subsequent drama that had entangled them. Any way they looked at it, Aelin wasn’t staying for the clarification. She just slipped on the other shoe.

“I’m going,” she said, rushing for the door.

“Aelin—”

A glance over her shoulder told her he was making his move to get out of bed, denying her order to stay where he was. But it was too late—her hand was on the door knob.

“Goodbye, Rowan.”

Aelin twisted the handle, ignoring the rush of movement behind her and stepped out in the hallway. She thought it would be harder to not look back, but with every step he took away from that hotel room it only bolstered her resolve. They were better off like this, it was now up to Rowan to realise it.

~~~~~

*smiling in delight but also I'm sorry*

#set up #rowaelin fanfiction #throne of glass fanfiction #rowaelin month 2023

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checkoutmybookshelf · 29 days ago

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I Beg Your Pardon...WHAT Was That Cliffhanger!?

Sarah J. Maas is seriously going to make me sit through Chaol's Desert Adventure before she resolves the cliffhanger of this book, and quite frankly? That is just RUDE. Let's talk Empire of Storms.

This is your SPOILER WARNING and I'm going to spoil the end in like the first sentence after the cut, so if you're not through this book, this is your last chance to scroll by.

Holy gods Aelin is good at 4D chess and thinking on her feet in a clinch, because despite Maeve putting her in an iron box, she kept the wyrdkeys, Elide, and Terrasen's future safe. (I told you I was going to spoil the end.) Girl figured out that because Elena screwed up, she would have to die to keep the world safe from Erawan and the Valg, so what does she do? She secures her kingdom's future, gives Aedion and Rowan and army with which to win the war, and even gets Lysandra involved to give Terrasen a royal bloodline. Like...I am seriously impressed by what Aelin managed to pull together. And she did it without help or input from her court because she's so tied up in it only ever being her who pays the price.

A price that Maeve is bound and determined to add one hell of a tax to...Faerie Queens are historically somewhat fraught figures, but this Maeve is one hell of a stone-cold bitch. She is also damn good at identifying wounds and applying pressure to them, so pretty much everyone who loves Aelin is absolutely devastated at the end of this book. There is an impending war, a deception to uphold, a rescue to enact, and a Valg king to destroy. And yet I still have to sit through Chaol's book before ANY of that and I am so salty about it. (Yes, I was aware of the tandem read option. I chose not to because that is so much unnecessary effort.)

Empire of Storms was super plot-heavy though; SO MUCH happened in this book. So let's dig into that a bit, and try to take it peice by peice.

Elorcan

Ok, so if I thought Elide was a bit damp in the last book, she got BADASS this book. This poor girl was abandoned, locked away, and finally given a chance to escape at the cost of Kaltain's life.

And I'm just going to take a second here to say that Kaltain got one hell of a raw deal. Girl was a bit of a bitch and out for money, but she absolutely did not deserve to end up at Erawan's mercy like that. Kaltain absolutely deserves justice. It's not just the stabby and stubborn girls who deserve to be treated with respect and care.

But Elide runs into Lorcan early in this book, and the two of them sort of...quietly accidentally fall into a relationship. It's one of those where you kind of have to tilt your head and squint, because its just...I mean if it works for them, then fine, but wow these are two deeply traumatized people and the trauma bond to relationship pipeline is SUPER odd.

We have Lorcan ceding authority right off the bat and letting Elide lead, he uses his magic to brace her bad ankle, she is giving him crap every five minutes, he's tearing up his shirt to make her pads, and ultimately they work to keep each other safe. Right up until Lorcan fucks it all up by summoning Maeve and handing Aelin over. Which Elide is taking SUPER personally because her mother died buying Aelin time to get out when Terrasen fell. And also because Lorcan lied to her. It's really fucked up in the BEST way, because it's clear that Lorcan and Elide are down BAD for each other, but Lorcan still thinks he's in love with Maeve. Who then immediately kicks him yo the curb because she can see what's plainly out in the open in front of her eyes, even if Lorcan can't.

I actually really enjoyed watching Elide and Lorcan figure out crossing paths with Aelin. He's grumpy and traumatized AF, and pretty much against his will and better judgement, he gloms onto this little lost girl. And his confidence and support gives her the courage and feeling of safety to actually grow into her own badassery. It's adorable, which makes his betrayal make me want to headdesk into oblivion. Like...Lorcan. SIR. You put all your plans on hold, walked into danger, and killed multiple people to keep Elide safe and happy. You seriously think Maeve is still the most important woman in your life???

Lorcan desperately needs therapy, but my god it's fun to watch him ruin his life.

Manian (and Also the Witches Generally)

Dorian and Manon are in the running against Aedion and Lysandra for best couple in Throne of Glass, especially since they're both deeply prickly, deeply wounded, and deeply ready to hop into bed with each other instead of dealing with the prickles and wounds.

Dorian is already protective as hell over Manon, despite his all-too-recent losses, trauma, and the fact that he's currently a king in exile. Which actually I think he's handling decently well--his little chat with Rowan about losing a loved one worked beautifully, and he is smart enough to ask for help with his magic. Although if the bigass battles with the Ilken and Maeve's fleet at the end are any indication, he's fine. He's just a fire hydrant of power, similar to Aelin.

Manon is...having a ROUGH TIME this book. Her grandmother keeps trying to murder Asterin, she keeps having this really inconvenient conscience, and it finally comes to a head when her grandmother disowns her after coming within about a quarter inch of disembowling her. It's really lucky that Abraxos is as smart as he is darling, because finding Aelin is pretty much the only reason Manon survives. And Abraxos gets all the wildlflowers he wants for being the goodest boi. He not only saves Manon's life, he also tracks down the thirteen and reunites everyone.

These parts of the book were honestly just delightful to read, and I am a fan of Manon and Dorian.

Aedion's Daddy Issues

Hoo boy, ok. Aedion has every right to have a METRIC TON of trauma, given his life. So to add daddy issues to his childhood, teenage, and adult trauma, his stress about not having an army or allies, and some feels for Lysandra is a LOT. And even Aedion is surprised by the depth of the emotion of his reaction to Gavriel showing back up in his life.

Thing is, though? Even if it's largely background and subtextual, we do get Gavriel and Aedion getting...if not reconciled, then accustomed to each other, and they work well together. I'm actually massively curious to see how their relationship continues to evolve now that Maeve has severed the blood oath to Gavriel and Aelin has been captured and Aedion has found out that she volunteered him to make babies with Lysandra to pass off as the Terrasen heirs and royal family.

Which...I get why she did it. But AELIN. DARLING. Guys have bodily autonomy too, and you can't just VOLUNTEER your cousin and your best friend as stud and brood mare, respectively.

My guess is Gavriel has some experience with serving a powerful, capricious woman who doesn't always tell you the whole plan, so if we don't get that conversation at some point, I will riot.

Lysandra Being the Best Ever

Lysandra is the best secondary character in these books, full stop. Our girl has really come into her own with her shape shifting, as we see in both Skull Bay and the battle with Maeve's fleet. She has to figure out a truly unique magic basically on her own, she is asked to go into battle in shapes she hasn't had a whole hell of a lot of time to practice with, and yet by the end of the book, she is MIXING AND MATCHING TRAITS to create an effective murder form that is capable of taking out fae ships.

And this is WHILE she is backing up Aelin's 4D chess shenangins, periodically messing with Aedion, supporting Aedion emotionally, and getting over her own trauma. Lysandra is the unsung queen of this series, and frankly she deserves 1000% of the credit for everything she does. Especially the popping up over random people's shoulders as a ghost leopard. Because I too would use that ability to scare the ever-loving shit out of people for funsies. We have to find our fun where we can during a war.

NOT TO MENTION that Lysandra is entirely willing to take not one, not two, but SEVERAL for the team. Aelin fully asks Lysandra to 1) impersonate her for the rest of Lysandra's life, 2) be fake married to Rowan and help rule Terrasen, 3) let Aedion impregnate her multiple times with children she will have to pass off as Rowan's to give Terrasen a legitimate bloodline, and 4) deal with Rowan and Aedion's lifelong grief and trauma over losing Aelin. That's a SIGNIFICANT ask, and Lysandra is full-on over here like, "Yeah, I'll do that, and sure, I'll also keep this plan secret from Rowan and Aedion until you're dead or as good as dead." Lysandra does not get enough credit for her role in this book, and this is me giving her all the credit.

Aelin Playing 4D Chess

Aelin gets so much credit for being stupid competent as an assassin. She gets weirdly less credit for her ability to play 4D chess. Because the LITERAL MINUTE she realizes that she's doomed to die to win the war and yeet Erawan back into whatever void he came from, she is calling in every chip and favor she can to get Terrasen an army that has a chance of winning the war. But she's also thinking long-term. She knows that for Terrasen to survive, it needs a royal family and legitimate bloodline, and she wrangles that too by legally marrying Rowan, and roping in Lysandra and Aedion to produce the crotch goblins that will pass as "hers" and Rowan's.

In addition, she is clocking Lorcan's betrayal and planning around it, ensuring that she can keep the wyrdkeys safe, and getting her people out of a REALLY Bad situation. Quite literally, Aelin's competence is just insane and I love that she is allowed to be this competent. It should get talked about more.

Seriously, That Ending

It is a truth universally acknowledged that the last 200 pages of a Sarah J. Maas book will contain approximately 70% of the plot and 85-95% of the emotional angst of the story. That holds EXTREMELY true for Empire of Storms. The entire showdown with Maeve and its aftermath was devastating for everyone, reader included. I full-on got teary when Aelin told Elide that her mother would be proud of her, and wanted to deck Lorcan SO HARD. Gavriel is going to need SO MUCH THERAPY after that nonsense, and I think Aelin and Aedion are going to need to literally just fight it out once she's safely retrieved.

Also, the "Rowan and Aelin were married for like two days" reveal was...a whole thing. Like...it potentially could feel a little contrived, but honestly I'd be lying if I said I wasn't invested and kicking my little feeties in joy over the angst. So as an ending, HELL YES. As a cliffhanger with a WHOLE OTHER BOOK before I get resolution on the Maeve and the iron box thing? JAIL. JAIL FOR SJM FOR 1000 YEARS.

We Just Briefly Need to Talk About Ripping Off Tolkien and Robert Jordan

Siiiiiiiiiiiiigh. Y'know guys... The bare amount of credit I am willing to give here is that clearly SJM has done her reading. You can't rip off the giants of the fantasy genre without READING the giants of the fantasy genre, and she's clearly read Tolkien and Robert Jordan. I just... she didn't even bother RENAMING the dead marshes. It's just...hotter and missing the phantom bodies. It's almost like she mashed up the dead and midgewater marshes but make them tropical.

And then we come to the box. The iron box in which the bad guys keep the super magical chosen one. Which is quite literally what happens to Rand Al'Thor in Lord of Chaos. Which like...I'm low-key over here going "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY????" Because now I'm just expecting the last book to be Dumai's Wells in Throne of Glass drag.

I realize that homage and allusion are standard in literature. And honestly it's fine. Except that I have been around the block with SJM enough to be DEEPLY SUSPICIOUS of this. So we'll see.

#throne of glass #empire of storms #aelin galathynius #aelin ashryver galathynius #rowan whitethorn #books and reading #books #books and novels #books & libraries #book recommendations

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feyres-divorce-lawyer · 1 year ago

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i am never, ever gonna forgive miss janet for killing gavriel. my poor bby keeps losing🥲

You know something? Aedion gets so much hate for absolutely no reason. Yes, he has had some questionable behavior but not once was it ever actually misplaced. He had every single right to be mad at everyone in KoA for lying to him about something that would affect him for the rest of his life.

They reduce his entire character to his actions in a very small part of one book. Have you forgotten how loyal, strong, smart, caring, passionate, soft, optimistic, courageous, kind, brave, reliable, genuine, honorable, thoughtful, gentle, compassionate, and selfless he is? Please.

#justice for aedion #aedion ashryver deserves better #aedion apologist #except he did nothing nothing wrong☝️😤

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feyres-divorce-lawyer · 1 year ago

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first tiktok video i ever made was 10 minutes defending aedion. going back to my roots fr😌

#aedion slander shant be tolerated #and i mean slander in its correct meaning cuz the main reason ppl don’t like him is based on LIES #he’s innocent idc #he’s never done anything wrong in his life #he’s bbg #justice for aedion #if you don’t get him just say that🙄#pro aedion ashryver #aedion deserved better

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highladyofterrasen7 · 1 year ago

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Tag yourself

#house is on fire #god is dead #gavriel #rowan whitethorn #chaol and his bitches #chaol westfall #aedion ashryver #elide lochan #lysandra #dorian havilliard #manon blackbeak #lorcan salvaterre #aelin ashryver whitethorn galathynius #aelin galythinius #fenrys deserved a better last name #fenrys moonbeam

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sofiasjornal · 10 months ago

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Kingdom of Ash Review (a little late)

I really didn't know what to write about this one, or even how to say goodbye, so I won't!

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The first 250 pages were absolute hell. Not because they weren't well written, they really were, and that was why they were so difficult to get through. What Maeve and Cairn did to Aelin... I suffered with her through every single line of those chapters. And when she rescued herself (because let's face it, she did it, Rowan and the others were just there to help her) I didn't feel as much relief as I thought, I felt really tired. And when she said she too was tired, my heart broke alongside hers.

Everyone who told me Chaol got better in KoA was absolutely right! He grew a lot, but I suppose war does that... and Yrene. We all need to bow down to Yrene.

Gavriel's death broke my heart in tiny little pieces. I really thought he and Aedion would have the time to talk properly, to get to know each other... but they didn´t... But in the end, Gavriel died protecting his won, just like a father would.

I loved how all of the couples got to in the end. It was a fitting end for everyone. The only thing that bothered me a little was how Dorian and Manon's storyline was left open ended. With two impredictable characters as those two, I just don't know. Somehow I dont see Manon marrying Dorian and becoming the Queen of Adarlan, not after so much pain to get the witches together. Maybe they'll be happy with the back and forward... I guess is up to us to imagine how those two would end up in the end.

But Aelin... Aelin went home and got everything she deserved. Every moment of peace she fought so hard and sacrificed so much for... And now she's rebuilding a world, a better world. Just like she promised.

I realised that I will never be able to say goodbye to Aelin. I think about her constantly, about her strength, her endurance, her passion. I loved her from that first moment and I would've followed her to hell, and we did. But even now, that Throne of Glass is officially over, I do not say goodbye. I keep her here. Always

Aelin

#books #sarah j maas #throne of glass #tog #bookblr #book review #kingdom of ash #aelin #aelin fireheart #queen aelin #aelin throne of glass #aelin ashryver galathynius #aelin galathynius

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shadowqueenjude · 1 year ago

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Scenes we needed in ACOTAR, TOG, CC

A wholesome father-son moment… could’ve been Gavriel and Aedion but nooooo Sarah killed him off. The most wholesome father son moment was literally with Dorian’s father’s ghost 💀 then his ghost was destroyed too. Lorcan’s mated male revenge: look Rowan got his mated male revenge. I fully contend Lorcan deserved his mated male revenge too. But noooo Aelin just had to butt in😒. More cadre backstory bc they’re hot warriors who were together for centuries, duh. What Lorcan did. More Lucien. More Eris. More Lucien. More Eris. More Lucien. More Eris. I’m a simple woman, I just want more hot Vanserra boys. Lucien’s POV when he went to get Vassa. I mean, I was so sure we’d get his POV for this and I was furious we didn’t. I mean come on, he ventured where even the most powerful High Lord feared to tread. And survived, by himself. And I want to know how he felt meeting Elain and Feyre’s father. I want to know what obstacles he faced. The other courts: We’ve BARELY seen any court besides Night and Spring, and there are three courts we haven’t seen at all. I’m still hoping we’ll get this because of a potential elucien book (also my hope for seeing firedick), but idk why it has taken this long. More Aidas. I thought he’d be more important but he kind of disappeared after book 1. “Aidas” in book 2 was literally the Asteri💀. CAN WE HAVE ONE GOOD WEDDING SCENE???? WE WERE ROBBED OF THE ROWAELIN AND ELORCAN WEDDINGS. Idc for Feysand, but they won’t have a wedding scene either. No chaorene wedding either 😭 . We haven’t even got a mating ceremony. We’d better get the Lysaedion wedding at least🙄.

#rowaelin #elorcan #lysaedion #lucien vanserra #pro lucien vanserra #eris vanserra #pro eris vanserra #lorcan salvaterre #lord lorcan lochan #gavriel #cadre #queen vassa #vassa acotar #elain archeron #feyre archeron #dorian havilliard #chaol westfall #yrene westfall #yrene towers

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tomtenadia · 1 year ago

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Detours to you - ch 15

Good evening/day/night...

Here I am with a niche fluffy holiday chapter. In real life the solstice is two week away, but in Orynth it's celebration time...

I promise nothing but fluff ❤️

MASTERLIST

A week had passed and the solstice was finally upon them. Aelin had recovered from her injuries and had already gone back to work claiming that the shop was busy and she could not leave Elide and Lys alone. But on that day and the one after they were closed as in Orynth tradition.

At home she had decorated the house with Rowan and Maya. The fun day was meant to be a week before but she had preferred a fight and a bit of drama. However, the following day Rowan had retrieved a big box of decorations he had collected from her old flat and the three of them had a great day decorating and while she studied father and daughter, she had realised that she had never felt any happier. The scene reminded her of her childhood with her father getting the house ready.

Now, on the morning of the solstice, Rowan was downstairs in the kitchen making breakfast. It was a holiday so he was preparing waffles with ice cream and strawberries. Aelin and Maya arrived twenty minutes later, his daughter clearing sleep away from her eyes with her fists.

“Morning ladies,” his voice full of cheerfulness.

“Gee whitethorn, you have too much energy already.”

In one long stride he walked to her and gently placed a mug in her hand and a gentle kiss on her cheek, then he turned to Maya, helped her to climb on her chair and placed her pwn glass of chocolate milk.

He had found a version specific for kids with no sugars and high in calcium. If she wanted to have it as a breakfast drink, he had to make sure it was healthy. The sugary breakfast that morning was a one off due to the holiday.

Waffles ready he distributed them and for a moment silence fell until Maya rose her hands in the air “I finish.”

“Do you want a few more strawberries?”

“No, presents.” She scurried down the chair but Rowan stopped her “Maya, back on the chair. No presents until mum and I are done.”

She sat on the floor in protest and folded her arms at her chest. A deep pout painted on her face “You are so slow.”

Aelin tried not to laugh “Dad is right, wait for us.”

“But I finished.”

Rowan went to pick up Maya and sat her on his lap “Come on, have another strawberry.”

“No, I want my presents.”

It was twenty minutes later after they were done and Maya had been protesting loudly the whole time. Rowan then grabbed her potato sack style and stomped in the living room “You have no patience just like your mother.”

Aelin followed behind “Hey, I heard you.”

Rowan smiled “When it comes to food or presents you are the same.”

She plopped on the sofa “Lies.”

“So, present time,” he grabbed one and passed it to Aelin. It was an envelope and he did not miss her disappointed face. Which turned quickly as soon as she saw what was inside “Rowan, how did you know? I have been dying to try this new spa in ages.”

He smiled “I know. I heard you speaking about it once I was in the shop. You Elide and Lys were non stop.”

“Ro, it’s three passes.”

He nodded “You can take El and Lys with you.

“What about the shop?”

“Well, if you ladies go on a weekend I can work there, take Maya with me and I can ask Aedion too.”

Aelin looked at him puzzled.

“Hey, I can ask Fenrys, the man can charm anyone.”

“Rowan I…”

“Ae, you deserve a break. And this is it. You three ladies have a day off.” He winked “I just thought that with friends was a better experience than alone. And I got you a great package.”

“Thank you.”

Aelin had gifted Rowan a photo book with a lot of Maya’s pictures. Her entire journey from the day she was born “It’s not much but I had no idea what to give you.”

Rowan looked at Aelin with soft eyes “It’s perfect.”

He opened the first page with Maya’s hand in the paint.

“Dad, who is it?” Asked Maya crawling closer and looking at the pictures.

“This is you, my love.”

Then it was Maya’s turn. Aelin had gifted her a few books, a LEGO set and then the reason why their daughter was now running around screaming.

Aelin had got her hands on three behind the scenes VIP passes for a meet and greet with the Stags.

“Do you like it?”

“Yes! I want Dorian to write my jersey.”

Aelin laughed “we can ask him for an autograph.”

She then turned to Rowan “The third pass is of course for you.”

“Wonder if the women’s team will be there?” He joked “I have my crushes too.”

“Now it’s my turn.” He disappeared upstairs and came back a few minutes later with a big box.

Maya rose on her knees all excited.

With Rowan’s help she tore the paper and gasped at the present. It was a telescope.

According to a lot of reviews that was the best model for kids her age and for beginners “I know you have one at grampa’s but this one you can keep it in your room and it’s all yours. When you are older you can use mine.”

Maya jumped in his arms “I love it.”

“Now we need to wait for the snow to melt and we can go in the garden and look at the stars.”

Around eleven they were ready to go the grandparents.

Maya had decided that she was not changing and was remaining in her new elf pyjama. Both parents tried but in the end they were just going to Aelin’s parents.

“Just the jacket and the thick socks, please?”

“Fine,” she conceded while Aelin finished preparing and Rowan was outside getting the car ready. He had got it back the previous day. Until then, he had taken Aelin and Maya to the shop with him and retrieved after he finished work. Aelin’s car was still in his driveway but he was not letting her drive it until the weather got better.

“Are we ready?”

Aelin was fighting trying to make Maya wear her jacket “Why is the munchkin not ready yet?”

“Because apparently she has picked today to make her own opinion on everything. Now it’s shoes and jacket.”

“Elves don’t wear jackets and shoes.”

Rowan sighed “well, the car will be warm by now. Let’s go tornado.”

“I am not a tornado. You are a tall stupid fairy.”

“Maya!!” Aelin climbed at the back with her daughter to place her in the car seat “Apologise to dad.” She has seen Rowan’s expression darken all of a sudden “Come on.”

“Sorry dad.”

Rowan turned “it’s okay, baby.”

Aelin joined him at the front and her hand landed on his thigh. Rowan squeezed her hand and then set the car in motion.

The Galathynius’ house appeared in the distance surrounded by trees and snow. Aelin’s parents lived just outside the city. Not as far as Rowan but enough to have a more secluded atmosphere.

“Can I get off?”

Rowan stopped the car and Aelin ran at the back to free Maya “Stay there, you can’t walk in the snow.”

Alerted by the sound of the car crunching the snow, Evalin and Rhoe appeared at the door and Maya became excited to see her grandparents and tell them all about her presents.

Rhoe closed the distance “Maya!”

“Granda! Look I am elf!”

The man laughed “you are a cold feet elf, let’s get inside.”

Rhoe took his granddaughter inside while Aelin and Rowan grabbed their stuff. Aelin had brought a bottle of wine and Rowan had insisted on baking, although he knew Evalin had likely prepared a feast for an army. Then the usual bag that Aelin carried with Maya’s stuff.

Once inside, Evalin greeted them both and Maya ran to them all excited “Grandad gave me socks.”

Rowan’s hand went to his hips “Oh so you wear socks if grampa says so?”

She wiggled her foot and showed her parents the thick woollen socks with pandas on.

“Well, Rowan, how can we compete? Ours were just plain blue.”

Satisfied, Maya ran away and the two walked to the kitchen were the most amazing smell hit their senses. Rowan had almost forgotten how an amazing chef Evalin was.

“This smells amazing, Evalin.”

“Thanks Rowan, I went with some of your favourites too,”

He smiled and offered her his container “I made cinnamon rolls last night.”

After Evalin politely shooed Rowan away she pulled her daughter to her “So, you seem better.”

Aelin nodded, grabbing the glass of wine her mum gave her “He almost lost us because I was stubborn and Maya was suffering for our fights. So we talked and we are working on things.”

“Good,’ added Evalin while stirring “Do not let him go again, Aelin. Men like Rowan are rare.”

Aelin knew. She knew how lucky she was having a sort of second chance with him. The few dates she had been on had been an utter disaster and Sam had fled the second date after she had confessed she had a daughter.

“How’s the little tornado adjusting to her dad?”

Aelin chuckled “she has him already whipped.”

“Go, join them. I will be there soon with food.”

She left the kitchen and carried the tray of appetisers and a bottle of wine for the adults and some juice for Maya. She passed a glass to Rowan but he stopped her “I don’t drink.”

Aelin forgot that he was really strict when it came to alcohol, especially when he was driving.

“I’ll take orange juice like Maya.”

“Maya, did you tell your grandpa about your presents?”

Rhoe laughed “Oh yes, she gave me a full account.” He then turned to Rowan “So, how’s work?”

Rowan grabbed his glass of juice and leaned back on the sofa “Getting used to it, it’s a lot of paperwork and inspections and meetings but I love it.”

“Good,” he added “your predecessor left a bit of a mess.”

“He was a doodoo head.” Added Maya while busy colouring her book.

“Maya what did we say about such words?”

“Sorry.”

During dinner Maya sat between her grandparents and entertained the whole family.

Rowan was coming back from the toilets when he spotted a door that looked familiar. He pushed it open and found out it was the piano room. He stepped inside and memories flashed back to him. Of a time of happiness. With his finger he gently brushed the wooden lid. He hadn’t heard Aelin play in a long time. She was so good and shy and he would push her to practice and play for him every time they were at her house. Slowly he lifted the lid and sat on the bench. With his fingers he pressed some random buttons making nothing but a metallic sound.

“I doubt the Terrasen National Orchestra will call you soon to play for them.”

He turned at the voice and saw Aelin leaning against the door frame. She then walked to him and he looked up at her.

Aelin stared at Rowan and her mind replayed the memories of the last time they were together in that room. Her hand carded in his long silver hair and his eyes closed at the gesture.

“I haven’t…” she paused “I haven’t played the piano since the last time you and I were here,” she confessed while sitting beside him “Life happened, I let you go and I felt empty and with that I lost the desire to play.”

Rowan pulled her closer and in that moment Aelin placed her fingers on the keys and a gentle melody started to play in the room. His arm wound around her waist and he just listened as the tune evolved in a crescendo of joyful music.

She finished and turned to him. Rowan stared at Aelin in her deep blue eyes. She inched closer and her lips closed on his.

Rowan cupped her cheek and then pulled back “Aelin…”

“I am sorry.”

“No,” he said, kissing her gently again “It’s just that I don’t think I am there yet.”

Aelin was about to pull away from him completely, but Rowan kept her close. With his finger he lifted her chin to stare in the depth of her blue eyes “My feelings are a mess. I…” he paused “If we decide to go ahead with whatever this is, we need to make sure we are not in love with the echo of what we were five years ago.” His hand gently removed a rebel lock of hair from her face “We have Maya to think about and I want us to be real, our feelings to be real and not just memories of what we were.”

Aelin nodded and leaned against him and Rowan kissed her head and enveloped her in his arms “I want to try, Aelin.” A soft whisper and she searched his stare.

“Maybe we can start with a good old fashioned date?”

Her lips crashed against his again “I’d love to, chief.”

Not long after Maya and her parents walked in the room and they all celebrated the rest of the afternoon in the room, with Aelin playing and all singing songs together.

Aelin stared at the falling snow while her fingers moved on the keys as if those five years had never happened. She looked at Rowan and at her daughter at her side and let the music grew and soar.

Rowan pulled her closer with Maya tucked between them and kissed Aelin.

In that snowy solstice days the notes of music carried the flakes of hope to the skies.

taglist

@rowaelinismyotp @swankii-art-teacher @whimsicallyreading @elentiyawhitethorn @aelin-bitch-queen @bruiseonthefaceofhumanity @mis-lil-red @thegreyj @sailorsassley @leiawritesstories @clairec79 @morganofthewildfire @sv0430 @heartless--aromantic @autumnbabylon @rowanaelinn @backtobl4ck @susumaus98 @gracie-rosee @mybloodrunsblue @tanvee1231 @avenrebekah @whoever-you-choose-to-love @theywillnotsingforme @universallytreepost @black-daisy-water @goddess-aelin @whispers-in-the-darkest-heart @lovely-dove-zee @athena127

#rowaelin fanfic #rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #rowan x aelin #rowaelin fanfiction #aelin x rowan #rowanwhitethorn #throne of glass fanfiction #aelin galathynius #domestic fluff

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