#adrian 01

[vuldak-juneau]

@adrianvoll Location: Hrimthur’s Outpost  Time: The day preceding the full moon Notes: Crunchin’ bones might not be all it’s cracked up to be

The worst of her fears had been assuaged for now; she had successfully survived her first shift and found some unfortunate to consume in whole from outside the haven of the outpost. However, new fears surfaced as she continued cultivating her understanding of exactly what she was now and what was required to sustain her. A few weeks ago, she had almost embraced her new form of being, and she would continue to pretend outwardly that this infernal shape that would hold her for the rest of her unnatural life was something she welcomed. The more she learned, the less this was so, but she did what she could to keep this to herself, internalizing it and allowing it to swirl in her private whirlpool of resentment and anger and regret--but not to allow it to make her vulnerable. 

But that was how she felt right now–vulnerable. And raw. And untethered. The first time she had shifted into her werewolf form was deeply frightening and unpleasant. Compared to the sensory overload and vice-grip the first shift into her vuldak form had over here even after it as said and done, all prior shifts into a werewolf were mere child’s play. The moon had sunk below the horizon line and the sun had risen to take its place hours ago, but still, Juneau felt deeply misplaced from her human form. Her hands still shook from the sheer stimulation of it all and the short bursts of memories of what had occurred in her vuldak form the night before playing out like macabre stagecraft before her in a way she couldn’t make any narrative sense of. She felt outside of her body–beside, above, watching–but not back in it and she agonized over the fear that this was what she would feel like for the rest of her days. 

Kettle would come to look for her soon, she thought to herself. He wasn’t a fool, even if he demonstrated he was willing to suffer one when he made an alliance with her. He would know what she was–perhaps not a vuldak exactly, but he hadn’t needed to ask questions when she told him not to expect her at the decrepit little home he allowed her and Adrian to sleep within. He’d only given her a slight sidelong glance and let the matter go without any fanfare or prying into her business. Then she remembered it was light out, early in the day, and there would be little to no chance he’d risk the discomfort of the sun to come to collect her when he had little to no reason to suspect she’d be out cowering at the edge of the woods licking the wounds of her misfortune. 

Juneau pulled her knees close to her chest and rested her chin on her knee. It was fully within her power to simply get up and walk back into the populated area of the crumbling village, but for some reason her anxiety and overwhelm from what had happened just the night before weighted her down to the small rock outcrop she sat on like an anchor. So wrapped within her own ruminations and feelings so outside of herself she left her situational awareness by the wayside. Normally, she might have heard Adrian’s approach.

[ars-gratia-auden]

The part of the day that Auden despised had run away; the hour or so during which their novice understudy insisted upon spending an hour away from the shop to take in fresh air and have something to eat. Hard work, the way Auden saw it, rarely broke routine and schedule for such base matters. There were working hours and there were personal hours–the matter of sustaining oneself ought to occur in the hours when there was no sun. Nothing compared to natural light when it came to working on the finer details of their craft, and the hours with sunlight were so precious and few. But the apprentice would quit if pushed too hard. Auden had long since learned how fragile amateur smiths could be. 

Company was rarely a welcome part of the short break Auden took to watch the front of the shop. Most days, they ended up locking the doors instead of dealing with the general public, after all their expert hands could make great progress in the course of an hour by this point in their career. When the dark haired man walked into the front of the forge, Auden immediately regret abandoning their usual routine. Their blue eyes tracked Adrian as he perused the shop. Body language and mannerisms marked him as a foreigner, but his clothes didn’t designate him as obviously Iskaran. The forgemaster struggled to place him, and thus dismissed Adrian from their gaze and returned to their ledger.

When Adrian spoke, Auden was unimpressed. The storefront was filled with many examples of smith work, some similar, but some in starkly different contrast from one another. There was almost nothing in the front of the shop that Auden could not replicate successfully, but they had not made all that was displayed within. “Would that be so unbelievable?” Auden asked. They sidestepped a lie by answering Adrian’s question with another question. But they were less interested in lying to the human than they were gauging if he had a true appreciation for the work and the gift of an artist’s eye–or did he simply have taste. “Nothing in the storefront is for sale. I work on a commissioned basis only.” That might change, however, with the promise of great conflict looming in the air.

starter for @ars-gratia-auden.

where: at thee blacksmith shop

when: B.T.A (before tower acceptance)

note: thank u for ur eternal patience

Adrian's worries often bled the confidence out of him; his magic wasn't rigorously tuned as all these Lysarans and his worry only grew with each passing moment that he didn't present himself to the Tower. He'd gotten enough information about the idea of what would be to come if he were accepted; fundamentals of spell weaving, sensing and manipulating the flow of magic, the core thread of any magic user. It all seemed an easy feat, but fear plagued him, what little magic he'd fine-tuned had been towards imbuing weapons and objects, wondrously forged daggers and blades that he personally crafted, but those he had to destroy just as quickly simply for threading them with magic. That was when Iskaldrik resided at the helm of his life, but Iskaldrik was no more, and as Adrian teetered through the options - the Tower, returning to the familiar heat of the forge - he found himself situated outside a blacksmith shop within Eterna.

Jamie had said to investigate all options, and it wouldn't be like Adrian to enact such diligence; but he was also a Völl, and often when he was set on a path, it was hard to sway him. Talented, but not necessarily inspired, Adrian entered the shop, offering greetings to the person who stood behind the counter; dozens of forged relics and blades separated the two from one another, but he strolled up eyeing the personal touch that was placed on each item. "Impeccable work, but I take it you don't need me to tell you that," a gracious tone, void of snark as his eyes shifted from each object, "You crafted all of these yourself?" Certainly, there were others within the shop, each with their own special touch within the forge, but Adrian could recognize a smith's personal branding and theirs seemed to touch upon each item and weapon within eyesight currently.

[adrian-stamos]

I always believed I would have this but it’s another thing to dream it, another to live it. I just turned forty and I’m staring into the eyes of my child while her mother sleeps near me. Serafina is laying against my propped legs as we sit together in bed, Jean’s back resting against my thigh to make sure I stay close while she rests. I don’t mind. I’m perfectly content staying still.

Serafina is quiet, her small hand squeezing my finger for dear life as she tries to bring it to her mouth. I can’t help but chuckle quietly. I grab her pacifier which she immediately takes, closing her eyes as she suckles.

The white noise machine is playing. The house is peaceful as is my heart. Jean will have moments of anxiety. It amplifies if Serafina is out of sight. I know this is because of the trauma of losing a child. I help ease her worries without coddling her fears. Doing so will only make her anxiety worse. I wonder when it will lessen and I wonder when professional help will be needed, if at all.

I want her to enjoy motherhood with Serafina without fear, to be able to truly let go and live in the beautiful moments we’re creating. I hope we can accomplish this soon.

I’ll be traveling for work again in a month. I haven’t left either of them since Serafina was born and I worry if Jean will be truly okay alone without my help. I pray that everything will be okay because it will be. Right?

[jamieprice]

Person: @adrianvoll Location: Lil abandoned haus The village feels like it's hardly that. It is a grouping of sad little buildings that feel almost eerie to be moving in and out of. Felt a wee bit like they were desecrating a tomb, but it had to be done. So he'd cleared out a place, made a point to claim the cellar for himself, it's not much but it's something. He creeps out at night, tries to get some kind of news, ventures out into the wastes just a little as he tries to think of what's next. They're with the other refugees for now, he still thinks with Juneau, himself, and Adrian, they've got a better chance of surviving. "Ye know, the point of down here is that it's cold an' dark." He calls out as he hears the cellar door crack. It's evening, he's lounging in a sheet he's fashioned into a hammock and there seems to be a pause. "Unless yer trying tae offer breakfast in bed." It's cheeky because the smell of magic, coal, lingering metals, waft from the cracked door and he knows it's Adrian and not Juneau. That and he knew she wouldn't hesitate. Juneau didn't give much a damn about his privacy, the feral little thing.

[jean-stamos]

Jean stirred in the comforts of their king-sized bed, eyes still closed and heavy with sleep.

It was the morning after her picnic date with her husband and daughter, and Jean had not slept soundly all night. But, just like every morning, she needn't open her eyes to know that another perfect day in paradise awaited her.

The warmth of the morning sun was streaming through their window, its rays pleasantly light on her skin. Their plush duvet, wrapped around her bare body, kept her snug and cosy. And if she were to keep really quiet, she could hear the distant waves crashing against the pebbly beach in the docks below. It was like waking up in a dream...

But even all that was nothing, nothing compared to waking up to her husband's perfect touch.

A smile graced her lips at the very thought.

In need of the warmth only Adrian could deliver, Jean reached for his hand, only to be struck by something odd: her waist was free of his usual strong embrace.

"Baby?" she murmured, half asleep.

Pushing herself up to sit against their headboard, Jean rubbed the sleep off her eyes in an attempt to clear this morning's confusion. But one look at the empty spot beside her was confirmation enough: Adrian was not there.

He must be with their daughter, she assured herself in an effort to stay calm. But even so, she had to check, just to see.

Throwing the duvet over, Jean got out of bed and reached for her silk robe. Wrapping it securely around her, she padded her way down the hall from the master bedroom, towards the nursery where she was sure she'd find her family.

But she didn't even need to step inside to know it was empty.

They must be having breakfast, she thought, as she made her way down the grand staircase. However, with each step downward, she grew more and more uneasy.

Jean's heart sank like iron when she found their kitchen as desolate as it was pristine. There was no sign of her husband or their daughter, or even the most minute indication that either of them had been there at all that morning.

Like a spark, every bit of calm she'd been trying to harbour was gone and she found herself frozen in panic. Despite not being able to move, her head raced with an onslaught of ideas, places, people and situations they could be in. With her heartbeat challenging to beat her mind's panicked pace, her eyes darted for her phone.

Shit! It was upstairs.

Tightening her robe, Jean ran as fast as she could back to their master bedroom, taking two steps at a time to get there. Once she had her phone in hand, she immediately dialled Adrian's number before once again scouring every room on the second floor.

No answer.

Jean tried again as she made her way down the stairs. Mid-step, she stopped. The familiar tone was ringing from his study.

"Adrian???" Jean called out as she rushed in that direction. "Baby, are you there??? Do you have Serafina???"

Again, there was no answer. Instead, she was met by the lone device ringing continuously atop his mahogany desk. But no sign of him or their daughter.

Standing in the middle of his study, Jean tried everything, and everyone. She could barely remember how many people she'd called by the time the room had started spinning.

"I don't want to lose you..." Her husband had said the night before when he finally expressed how he'd been feeling as of late. "I don't want to lose you... to you... But if you keep going like this, you're going to lose yourself to your anxiety, your paranoia, your fears to the point where I won't matter, and you won't hear me..."

The pain in his voice echoed louder now than it had the previous night when he'd spoken those words, the kind of pain that threatened to knock her off balance as the room spun faster and faster and faster...

"You wouldn't even notice if I was gone. That's how far gone you'd be..."

"I'm sorry!" Jean cried out to a ghost of a memory. "Baby, please... I'm so sorry!!! I'm here now, I'll do better! I promise! I promise, I'll do better..."

But her pleas were of no use. Her surroundings whizzed by her like an unending storm, blurring her vision, catching her breath until finally, all four walls had dissolved into one dizzying tornado plunging Jean right into unconsciousness.

"Jean???" Dazed and confused, Jean felt someone pick her up. "Jean. Jean!" A familiar warmth immediately encircled her frail frame, pulling her close. "Baby, wake up...."

"Adrian...?"

"Yes, baby, it's me... " Four words. Four simple words that breathed life back into her lungs. "Are you okay?" he asked, his deep-set voice laced with worry. "I was making us breakfast when I heard you scream. So, I took Sera and ran up here."

Sure enough, in his other arm, snug as ever, was their darling daughter. Reaching for her mother, the little babe wrapped her tiny fingers around Jean's thumb, cooing happily.

"I think you were having a nightmare," Adrian chimed in quietly, looking at his wife with great concern.

A nightmare. Was that all that was? It felt so incredibly real.

Silent, Jean conceded with a nod. Unable to meet his gaze quite yet, shame cursed through her body, rendering her too embarrassed to speak — of what it was she'd been dreaming about, screaming about, much less have the courage to divulge what it was that had been haunting her all night.

"It's going to be all right," Adrian reassured his wife like he'd always do, right to the gentlest kiss on her forehead. Pulling his girls closer to his sturdy chest, Adrian promised, "We're right here, baby, okay?"

It was those words that encouraged Jean to finally meet her husband's gaze.

Blinking back her tears, she pondered how could she be so lucky that this was her actual reality. From the day she met Adrian, up until now, she never truly believed she deserved him, and yet he shows up every single time she needed him. It was high time she returned the favour; to show him how much he means to her, how grateful she was for everything he does, and that she wouldn't just notice if he was gone, she'd die.

Determined to never let her nightmare come to light, Jean spoke at long last.

"I am, too," she murmured, her voice soft and sincere. Reaching out to delicately glide her fingertips across his cheek, she placed a tender kiss on his lips. "I'm right here, too, my darling..." she vowed with all her heart. "For whatever you need, whatever you both need, I'll be here, too."

[vuldak-juneau]

It was quieter on the docks now that the throngs of people had filed onto the many vessels that now dotted the expanse of azure waters stretching out so far the horizon line blended with the darkening sky. Earlier in the day, Juneau had watched as a handful of new ships were christened in Neptune’s name and it struck her as odd and wasteful when fizzing bottles of champagne were shattered against the sides of the ships. Something about good luck, she had overheard, They were partying in Neptune’s home, which seemed hospital enough for an uncaring god. Did they really need to trash his lawn, too? 

Juneau saw the Lysarans as frivolous people so far, as materialistic in the city of Eterna as they were unfriendly to the Iskarans. Iskaldrik had never felt like much of a home to her–she felt as if it housed her and she was housed within it against their collective wills and her hopes that the queen’s lands would be any better had been dashed in the matter of a few days. Its people seemed so trained in the art of recognizing outsiders and Juneau never slipped past their litmus tests. Under any other circumstance, she wouldn’t be caught dead in an area like Juno’s rest in the high holy days of Neptunalia, but something had compelled her to sign up for a “Mystery Sport” event. There was no indication she’d be any good at whatever this enigma of an event would be, but it was likely she’d take to whatever it was better than a gladiator match, diving, or chariot racing. Loose acquaintances and those she had formed unlikely bonds during the flight from the Aetherians had been consistent in asking her what she was going to do now that they were across the border–maybe this would help her figure it out. 

The thoughts of her forward trajectory consumed her as she walked along the boarded path that splintered off into docks every few yards. She was grateful for the sudden silence, save the lapping of the water against the coastline, and tried to ignore the careless discards at her feet. If she’d had something to collect all of the refuse in, that’s likely what she would have been doing. Instead, she trod along with only the competing priorities and pathways she saw laid out before her. The thieves guild was an attractive offer, but didn’t Alder find those who lived by a thieves' code worthy of finding death between the jaws of a vuldak? Jamie was a mercenary, and he’d likely teach her everything he knew if she only asked, and she could simply eat her marks–but she didn’t have the stomach for that sort of thing. There was also the Legion, but she felt her life had only been her own to do with what she would for the last several weeks. If she had centuries to burn, she would want to learn something just for the sake of enjoying it, but she couldn’t read or write. It all felt so utterly impossible, and no matter what she chose, she knew she’d likely let someone foolish enough to believe in her down. 

A voice pulled her from the thought, and in truth, she hadn’t even noticed the man at the edge of the port. A pile of rocks was arranged behind him, and it reminded her of the cairns she had made as she traveled the unforgiving peaks along the borderlands between the two nations, vital tools in navigating. Lifelines, really. After a moment, her eyes shifted to his face and she was surprised to be met with a grin as wide and warm as his invitation to join him. Truth be told, Juneau had chosen to dress for the occasion in a manner she had expected, and which had up until this point been proven, to make her appear offputting and unapproachable. It seemed he was immune to the intended effect. 

Juneau yielded to his request, perhaps only because she desired to pilfer through the rocks at his side and because she knew it would take little luck to best someone in such a contest. As she pushed the rocks that he had collected around to examine each of them, set one aside as her chosen skipping stone, and dropped two of the rounder, smoother black stones into the drawstring bag she carried around (she was certain these held nautiloid fossils inside of them), she matter-of-factly informed him, “No god of this world cares enough about the affairs of little people like us to spare the time it would take to grant anything but their wrath.” She sat a few feet to his left after she said this, although she preferred to skip her stone while standing for her best opportunity to send it hopping along the water's surface for the furthest distance possible. “But if you think you hold Neptune’s favor, let alone a second of his attention,” she continued, gesturing a thin, pale hand toward the expanse of water that spread out before them urging him to skip his rock first, “by all means.” 

starter for @vuldak-juneau.

where: the ports on juno's reach

when: during neptunalia, before she was emotionally bludgeoned in the event

note: we're meet cuteing

The docks on the port were still littered with the remnants of former festivities; the sailing competition had set off the day before, but it seemed now that everyone had ran to witness a show of strength for the evening. A few parties stationed on extravagant boats were seen farther off in the bay, but they were far enough on the coast that they could be barely heard where he sat calmly on the port.

A pile of rocks sat next to him, some found on the nearby shore and some dusted in glitters and paint; Lysaran's were certainly known for their attention to details, everything one could witness on the Isle was intentional. Footsteps resounded behind him, once sharp and quick easily fettered to something more agile and purposeful. Julian skipped a rock on the water, shades of turquoise and blue leapt from the glinting coast as he held a second rock up in the air before his head finally turned to view who'd stumbled to the port.

"Skip a rock?" The golden retriever smile is at its brightest, obviously, before Julian follows with a pestering chide of persuasion, "Let's see who's been granted Neptune's favor."

[afshinxeldar]

closed starter for @adrianvoll location: eterna note: :fuckboi:

It had been quite some time since Eldar had seen the other man. Honestly, he never really had any intention of seeing people he had laid with once upon a time ever again. It was pretty easy for him to do such a thing. Afshin could take over and they would be none the wiser that he was around. It certainly helped with not having to think about how he had basically dined and dashed several times over. For lack of better phrasing of course. The only person that had ever really been worth his time was Thora and she barely liked to give him even a second of thought in that regard. As far as he was aware of course. But he had needs like everyone else. Was he supposed to just suffer in silence? Absolutely not. Adrian was just a means to an end really. Probably always would be, but he could still talk to the man. That was easy for Eldar to do even if he couldn't tell a lie. He knew his way around words though. "And here I thought you'd never be seen again. Found someone else to sell your shit to?"

[marimelwrites]

@musicallyiinclined - continued from your reply to my open starter HERE!

Adrian swallowed hard, feeling as though a lump were actually stuck in his throat at the sound of her apology, followed by her hopeful words. He didn't know if he had the strength in him anymore to smile her way. Those smiles were lost on her, and he wondered if he shouldn't just start anew. Try to get her to fall in love with him once again. He wasn't even sure that she could or would fall in love with him a second time. There was a good chance she wasn't completely the same person that she was when they'd met, or before the accident. This person before him might not look for what he had to offer.

"That's what they said," Adrian replied in agreement, accompanied by a small nod. His eyes closed as memories continued to swirl playing back like a film. "But, they said there was still a chance..." He didn't need to finish his statement. The unspoken 'that you might never regain that part of your memory' hung in the air between them.

"You don't have to apologize. This isn't your fault. None of this was your fault." If he could find the person who had caused this accident, he would lay out his frustrations until they understood the pain they'd caused him.

[samasmith23]

Evangelion: You Can (Not) Marathon — (Part 2)

Neon Genesis Evangelion, “Episode 2: Unfamiliar Ceiling/THE BEAST”

Continuing my Evangelion re-watch marathon with NGE, "Episode 2: Unfamiliar Ceiling/THE BEAST"! For my thoughts on the previous episode, click the link to the post below:

With that out of the way, let's dig in!

Lol! I love the way Sachiel picks up Evangelion Unit-01 after Shinji causes the mecha to trip! I bet the Angel is thinking to itself, “What the heck is this thing?! It’s not like those planes, missiles & bombs I dispatched earlier, but it’s clearly a threat! Arm go breaky-breaky and laser beam go through eye socket!”

Joking aside though, this scene further emphasizes my personal frustration with the bad-faith criticisms levied by the "Get in the EVA Shinji" crowd. Like... did people seriously expect Shinji to be perfectly efficent at operating a giant robot he had never even heard of before until literally less than an hour earlier, let alone utilizing it to fight and kill an approximately 40 to 95 meter tall world-destroying alien monstrosity?

The fact that Shinji immediately stumbles and trips during his first attempt to try and simply make the EVA walk, along with him being completely paralyzed with fear as the Angel stares down at him is honestly an incredibly believable reaction on his part! I know I'd certainly react the exact same way Shinji does here!

Also, the injuries that Shinji immediately sustains from Sachiel are definitely uncomfortable to witness as a viewer! Not only does Sachiel snap EVA Unit-01's left arm like a twig (simultaneously breaking Shinji's arm in the process since his nervous system is directly bonded with the EVA's), but the Angel then fires multiple laser blasts directly into Unit-01's right eye sockets, causing twin-streams of blood to shoot-out from both sides of the mecha's head!

Like... YIKES! The fact that Shinji ultimately survives this encounter without suffering permanent brain damage, but just short-term memory loss, is truly an astonishing miracle! Speaking of which...

Full disclosure, I remember being annoyed when I first watched this episode and it suddenly cut to Shinji waking up in the hospital the next day after being knocked out by Sachiel, implying that the entire fight happened off screen. However, after finishing watching this episode for the first time several years ago, I realized just how brilliant this move was on Anno’s part considering what we later learned happened during the fight towards the end of the episode.

Also, Shinji's first words upon waking up are, "An unfamiliar ceiling!" Title drop! Lol!

Oh boy! Our first scene of Gendo meeting with his higher-ups, the Human Instrumentality Committee, aka, our official introduction to the mysterious SEELE organization which oversee’s NERV!

Out of curiousity, I wonder if one of these guys is actually Shinji’s grandfather since his mother, Yui Ikari, later states in the flashbacks from Episode 21 that she’s the daughter of a high-ranking SEELE member, and the Committee is supposed to be SEELE’s inner council.

According to the official "EvaGeeks Wiki" though, while the Human Instrumentailty Committee's leader, Keel Lorenz, is from Germany, the unnamed yellow member is French, the blue guy is Russian, the green guy is American, and the red guy is British.

So does that mean Yui is of mixed-ethnicity? If so, that's cool!

Speaking of Chairman Keel though, here's some interesting behind-the-scenes trivia regarding the name of SEELE's enigmatic leader! In addition to "Keel" being derrived from the literal ship part (specifically the central lower spine of a watercraft's hull), the name "Lorenz" is a reference to the renowned Austrian zoologist and child psychologist Konrad Lorenz, whom in 2015 had his 1973 Nobel Prize in Medicine posthemusly revoked due to his historical affiliations with Nazi Germany (originally, Keel was actually intended to be the real-life Konrad Lorenz in the show itself).

While Hideaki Anno & crew likely chose the name as a subtle reference to the historical figure who popularized the psychological theory of "imprinting" in the field of childhood development (which makes sense considering how integral themes of teenage psychology & motherhood are to EVA's overarching narrative), the fact that Keel Lorenz is also named after an individual with literal Nazi ties is also fitting considering that as antagonists SEELE is a quasi-fascistic doomsday cult.

But I'll discuss more about that when the Human Instrumentality Committee true identity is eventually revealed in Episode 14!

Also, I don’t know why but the yellow French SEELE member always reminded me of the Vulture from Spider-Man. I think it’s the combination of the beak-like nose, the hunched back, and the elderly appearance (minus the hair and glasses of course...). And he’s not the only SEELE member who’s apparently a Marvel Comics cosplayer considering that Keel Lorenz is wearing a similar visor to Cyclops from X-Men. Although the blue Russian member seems to be a DC Comics cosplayer considering he looks an awful lot like the Penguin from Batman.

So basically the members of SEELE are all secretly Marvel & DC comic book fans! Lol!

Dang! The fact that even before the Angel's officially returned with Sachiel's attack on Tokyo-3, Gendo already had enough power and influence within the Japanese government to authorize a media-blackout for the rest of the country and entire world regarding the existence of the Angels is pretty impressive!

Seeing as NERV is a branch of SEELE which has ties to the United Nations, I'm guessing that the Human Instruementality Committee sent the Japanese Prime Minister a pretty convincing letter of reccomendation on Gendo's behalf!

Also, that closing exchange between Keel & Gendo is so FREAKING iconic!

Keel Lorenz: "Ikari, you do know that there can be no turning back." Gendo Ikari: "I know. Mankind has no time left."

Chills! Absolute chills everytime I hear it! Keel & Gendo's respective English VA's, Richard Peeples & Tristan MacAvery, are absolutely on point in this scene!

I really love the white & blue-tinted lighting of the hospital where he encounters an injured Rei again after waking up! It really establishes the ambigous and uncomfortable tone of their initial relationship!

While Misato's comment, "Man, air conditioning's the greatest thing. Man's triumph over nature," is funny on a surface-level, it simultaneously foreshadows another major reoccuring theme interwoven into EVA's narrative: the arrogance and hubris behind humanity's over-reliance on technology!

But I'll discuss those themes more in-depth when they become increasingly notable from Episode 11 onwards!

Lol! Even when being empathetic Ritsuko still can't help but continue being the scientist as usual: "Poor little kid. His cerebelum must have taken a lot of stress."

Double lol! Even Misato recognizes her friend's detatched demeanor: "Cerebellum? Don't you mean his heart?"

I honestly don't think voice actress Sue Ulu is given enough credit for her performance as Ritsuko in the original ADV Dub. She's incredibly effective at conveying Ritsuko's rational & analytical personality!

Oh boy... even though Shinji suffered short-term memory loss from Sachiel's laser blasts, he still has lingering subconcious memories of the injuries he sustained slowly bubbling back towards the surface, as demonstrated by him staring at his now-healed left arm with confusion & fear...

More effective mood-lighting on display when Misato' meets Shinji alone in the waiting room of NERV's infirmary, as both the characters and enviornment are completely obscured in shadows caused by the contrasting sunlight of the room's large exterior windows. It effectively symbolizes both Shinji & Misato wandering into the unknown as the two become more closely aquainted with each other!

Man oh man, the scene where Shinji & Misato accidentally encounter Gendo while trying to get on the elevator is absolutely brilliant in how so much information is conveyed here through facial expressions instead of dialogue! Shinji expects praise from his father for defeating the Angel.

Even though Shinji’s memory of how exactly it happened is foggy, he thinks he was still of some use to his father like he always wanted. And yet... Gendo has absolutely nothing to say to him, just staring coldly and blankly, further feeding into Shinji’s sense of isolation & self-loathing!

So many emotions are conveyed in such a short space of screentime without any dialogue whatsoever!

And all Misato can do is watch & grow increasingly concerned for Shinji’s well being. I do also love how quickly Misato catches onto Shinji’s struggles, as she deals with the exact same crap despite being more outgoing and carefree personality-wise than him. Which is part of why she decides to let him live at her apartment instead of alone where he can wallow in self-loathing.

Still, we also get some insight into Misato’s complicated struggles with sexuality versus motherhood derived from her Elektra Complex through her offhanded joke, “It’s not like I’m going to be making any ‘passes’ at [Shinji],” which absolutely enrages Ritsuko over the phone.

I love how when Shinji can’t help but feel further distressed after hearing random bystanders at the grocery store talk about Tokyo-3 being turned into a battle ground without even once mentioning Shinji's name or acknowledging his involvement, Misato takes Shinji to witness Tokyo-3’s skyscrapers rising up from below the GeoFront to show him the city he helped protect in an effort to validate his usefulness and worth as an EVA pilot.

As gorgeous as this scene is though, considering the sheer amount of Freudian symbolism that’s littered all throughout NGE, when I see those skyscrapers rising upward I can’t help but wonder if this was meant to be yet another example of psychosexual imagery.

Spike Spencer does a great job at capturing Shinji's feelings of awkward hesitance and unsure relief as he takes his first step into Misato's apartment and says, "I'm home," to which an overly cheery Misato replies, "Welcome home."

Also, keep this exchange in the back of your minds since it will later become thematically relevant in Episode 4!

Lol! It’s such a wild contrast seeing just how professional and composed Misato is while working at NERV, as opposed to how wild & messy her home life is. In addition to her apartment floors being littered with garbage bags, dirty dishes, and mountains of used & unused Yebisu beer cans (which is apparently a real-life Japanese alcohol brand...), Misato essentially acts like an immature college student within the privacy of her home, wearning nothing but tank-tops and short-shorts while drinking gallons of alcohol & having insta-ramen for dinner!

Yeesh... I just came to an uncomfortable realization here! Misato's home life is basically just like how I personally used to live back in college! Albiet... I never wore short-shorts nor drank beer (seriously, I think all alcohol tastes TERRIBLE!)...

That's honestly one of the more powerful elements of EVA's characters. They are disturbingly relatable and force you to interrogate aspects of yourself that you're sometimes uncomfortable acknowledging. Even during light-hearted and comedic scenes like Shinji & Misato's ramen & beer dinner conversation, NGE's maintains its well-deserved status as a phenomenal treatise on the human condition!

Lol! I always laugh so hard when an annoyed Misato snaps at Shinji's shyness: "WHAT?! ARE YOU FINICKY?!"

God bless Allison Keith! Her performance as Misato is an absolute treasure!

Also, some of the first indications of Shinji's struggles with his developing sexuality as he can't help but stare at Misato's breasts when she leans over the table and gets directly in his face during her aforementioned outburst!

Aww... poor Shinji really got the short end of the stick by being relegated to daily chores for 5 to 6 days of the week after losing several rounds of rock-paper-scissors with Misato.

Also, I once again find myself uncomfortably relating to Misato here since I too can unfortunately be incredibly lazy when it comes to household chores...

Also also, we get some more allusions to Misato's Elektra Complex with her joking, “This is your home, so feel free to take advantage of everything you want, except of course me that is!”

We’ll learn later in the series that due to her traumatic past as a survivor of Second Impact and her strained relationship with her deceased father, Misato spent her entire adolescence catatonic and began actively pursuing sexual relationships during college in order to fill in that empty void in her heart. In particular, men who subconsciously remind her of her late father such as her ex-boyfriend Ryoji Kaji...

In essence, Misato is a person who greatly struggles with developing meaningful relationships with others due to the ghosts of her past, and relies primarily on physical connections and innuendos in order to communicate her true feelings, while also subconsciously wanting to drive others away from her due to her internalized self-loathing.

We also see more of Misato's character flaws as she continues to belittle Shinji's anxiety by angrily grabbing his hair and shouting, "Yes, yes yes. Is that all you can say? It's getting on my nerves! You're a boy! Act like one!"

Yeah... similar to how Shinji has deep-seated issues with women and sexuality, Misato has some toxic and borderline patriarchal expectations concerning the behavior of men. Misato truly is just an older version of Shinji!

On the subject of Shinji's issues with women, we see his obvious discomfort at the sight of Misato's bras & panties hanging on the clothes chandeliers as he prepares to take a bath before panicking at the sight of a literal penguin inside the bathroom. This especially feels like subtle groundwork being laid for Shinji's more overtly misogynistic attitudes in The End of Evangelion?

Speaking of that penguin inside the bathroom though...

Lol! The introduction to Evangleion's official mascot, Pen Pen, accompanied by the classic gag of a terrified & naked Shinji running back to Misato where she has a strategically placed beer can in front of a smaller toothpick jar on the kitchen table to censor his crotch!

Even after all these years, this gag NEVER... EVER ever gets old! I think the reason why this joke is so famous and fondly remembered by EVA fans is because aside from the obvious absurdity of a literal penguin inside an apartment building as well as the strategically placed objects, Shinji's reaction is incredibly realistic & relatable (I know I'd probably have a very similar reaction if I saw a random wild animal in of my shower). Plus, Shinji's embarassed realization to Misato asksing, "Umm... why don't you cover up," with his face turning red and him awkwardly shuffling back to the bathtub further sells the relatablility of the gag!

Studio Khara would repeat this joke in the Evangelion Rebuild 2.22, but instead replaced Shinji with Asuka. Consequently, the scene in the Rebuild feels a lot more like uncomfortable male-gazey fan-service (rather than the slap-sticky humorous tone of the original scene with Shinji), especially since Shinji's also in the room with Misato when Asuka panics at the sight of Pen Pen, thereby leading to him getting kicked in the face by Asuka while the camera has her butt visible in the frame during said-kick.

Yeah... based on everything I've seen and heard, gratuitous and "comedic" fan-service is a major flaw with the Rebuild movies, whereas the original NGE either avoided or actively subverted typical anime fan-service tropes in order to further flesh out its characters.

Also, I love that subdued head-tilt Pen Pen gives Shinji as he walks into his personal automated refrigerator! Pen Pen be like: "What's the matter kid? Ain't ya never seen a warm-water penguin before?"

Also also, as you might have noticed in the upper-right image above, it's here that I feel is an appropriate time to introduce everyone to the official "Pen Pen Censor" sticker, which will definitely be appearing A LOT throughout this marathon (in order to meet Tumblr community guidelines) due to EVA's extensive coverage of themes regarding sex & sexuality.

On the subject of Pen Pen himself, however, while its never outright confirmed in the anime exactly Misato how got her hands on a unique species of "hot-springs penguin" as a household pet, but in the official manga adaptation written & illustrated by the series' lead character designer, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, it's eventually revealed that Pen Pen was actually an experimental lab animal from a company Misato was originally employed by before joining NERV. Feeling lonely and isolated in her home life, Misato took sympathy on Pen Pen and brought him home with her before he could be euthanized.

While the absence of Pen Pen's backstory's doesn't negatively impact the anime's quality at all, there is a part of me that does still wish it had been included since it further conveys the inherently selfish desires underlying Misato's desicion to invite Shinji to be her roommate. Just like Pen Pen, while she related to and sympathized with the "useless, greedy [bird's]" situation, Misato was also simply seeking companionship to help fill the void in her own heart.

The fact that Misato did not adopt Shinji for purely altruistic reasons serves as a major thematic element of her characterization, and invites the viewer to question whether or not Misato legitimately views Shinji as the son/brother that she never had, or merely perceives him like a pet to be coddled & objectified just like Pen Pen.

So... that "Shinji's lovely suite" sign that Misato taped onto Shinji's bedroom door. This defintiely seems to lean into the argument of Misato treating Shinji more like a pet than a roommate.

I know that all the infamous budget issues with Episodes 25 & 26 were totally unplanned, but the fact that the music tracks Shinji is repeatedly listening to on his radio are tracks 25 & 26 feels like it should not be a coincidence! It’s giving me some serious Grant Morrison vibes of back when they had the issue focusing on an older Damian Wayne fighting the satanic Third Ghost of Batman take place in Batman (1940) #666!

While Ritsuko seemed pretty cold in contrast to Misato back during Episode 1, I love how when she’s alone with Gendo here discussing the progress of Rei's recovery from the failed EVA Unit-00 activation test, she can’t help but express her own concerns about forcing literal 14-year-olds to pilot giant robots and fight alien gods.

Also... more EPIC FORESHADOWING with the panning shot of a half-frozen inactive EVA Unit-00 punching the window of a disused control room! This not only effectively builds-up towards the flashback later in Episode 5 concerning Rei's injuries, but is also thematically relevant to this episode's climatic flashback with EVA Unit-01 vs. Sachiel as well!

I love the intentional contrasting of Misato's earlier words about "Bathing [cleaning] the mind and soul," against her feeling guilty for "thinking of Shinji as a tool" in both her work & home lives while bathing.

I guess Shinji's thoughts, "Bad memories always [seeming] to find [him] in the bath," also apply to Misato...

Returning to Shinji though, this shot of him staring up at "another unfamiliar ceiling" while wearing his headphones as a form of escapism to ease his feelings of anxiety is so FREAKING iconic!

Honestly, as an autistic person who struggles with obsessive-compulsive disorder & anxiety who spends an awful lot of time wearing headphones to listen to YouTube and distract myself from both external and internal pressures of the world, I totally relate to Shinji here!

Furthermore, we get the return of the titular "unfamiliar ceiling" motif that Shinji referenced earlier in the episode when he first woke up in the NERV infirmary. The website Wrong Every Time did a far better job at explaining the significance behind that title & imagery in their review of Episode 2 than I possibly ever could! Specifically, they argue that unfamiliar ceilings serve as a physical manifestation of Shinji's "sense of displacement" at NERV HQ and Misato's apartment, symbolizing to the viewer that from Shinji's perspective, "[these places are not] his home. [From the] shots of the room’s disarray [to] Shinji’s physical entrapment [emphasizing] his discomfort, as he seems to bury himself away in the space between two repeating cassette tracks."

Like… dang! Wrong Every Time absolutely nailed it in their assessment of this scene! Or as Rei’s English voice actress Amanda Winn Lee infamously described in the audio commentary track to the original End of Evangelion DVD collection, “Nailed it like an Amish barn!” Lol!

The return of the unfamiliar ceiling as Shinji reminesces alone in his new bedroom about full events of the fight with Sachiel functions as a perfect transition to discussing the meanings of episode's secondary title... "THE BEAST!"

So... remember how I said earlier that I was initially really annoyed when I first watched this episode and it suddenly cut away from the Angel knocking Shinji unconscious to him instantly waking up in the hospital the next morning? Well it was during this flashback to the full fight from earlier right here that all my previous annoyance suddenly disappeared and I understood fully why this cut was necessary!

Not only does Anno's decision to have Sachiel’s defeat intially occur off-screen help pique viewer interest in exactly how Shinji defeated the Angel. Not only does it gradually build up the feelings of hollow victory and faint praise that Shinji & Misato couldn’t help but ponder throughout the rest of the episode. But it also effectively makes the ultimate reveal of EVA Unit-01 going berserk for the first time ever all the more shocking & horrifying!

No joke, when I first saw EVA Unit-01 suddenly open it’s mouth & roar I was legitimately FREAKING terrified! I just had so many questions swirling around in my head all at once since I initially thought that Unit-01 was simply just a robot. But this plot twist signified to me that not only are the Evangelions something far more mysterious & disturbing than mere robots, but that they’re also potentially even more dangerous monsters than the Angels!

Plus, the fact that Unit-01's berserker rampage was also foreshadowed back in Episode 1 with the EVA suddenly activating itself to protect Shinji from falling debris (as well as the "0-9 System" controlling it being a reference to Oni from Japanese demonology) makes this plot twist even more impactful!

For the sake of craps & giggles though, I bet the soul of Yui dwelling inside of Unit-01 was thinking to herself at that exact moment: “You will NOT kill my son!”

Also, this I love Misato & Ritsuko's contrasting reactions to Unit-01 going berserk! While, Misato is completely taken aback by this revelation, Ritsuko seems fearfully aware with the events transpiring when she whispers to herself, "Berserker!"

In essence, Misato acts as an audience-surrogate in this scene since just like her we're now completely frightened & suspicious about the Evangelion's true nature, while Ritsuko along with Gendo & Fuyutsuki have access to knowledge that the viewers are currently in the dark about!

Honestly in hindsight, the character's various reactions on display here significantly contributed to my desire to want to learn more about what exactly caused EVA Unit-01 enter a violent animalistic rampage!

As scary as the sight of Unit-01 going on a berseker rampage against Sachiel is though, HOLY CRAP is the sound-design & animation for this fight scene FREAKING phenomenal! In addition to Unit-01's blood-chilling roar heavily indicating the presence of organic vocal cords being suppressed by layers of electronic sirens, the shots of the EVA crouching down before flipping itself high into the air and pouncing onto Sachiel are so FREAKING iconic! Same goes for the 360° panning shot of Unit-01 turning around to face Sachiel again after shrugging off its inital counter-attack!

So wait... how exactly is Unit-01 able to regenerate its armored plating when healing its broken left arm? Is it liquid metal like the T-1000 or something?

Also, we get some more foreshadowing of both the EVA's being cloned from the Angel's progenitor Adam, as well as Unit-01's unique status as a clone of humanity's progenitor Lilith since not only does Unit-01 easily create its own A.T. Field to counter the frequency of Sachiel's, but it easily rips through the Angel's A.T. Field like it was tissue paper!

The animalistic brutality on display as Unit-01 simultaneously crushes both of Sachiel's arms before ripping apart the Angel's own bony chest-protrusions (spilling blue blood in the process) to stab its core is absolutely breathtaking to witness!

As uniquely awesome and uncanny the animation of Sachiel shape-shifting itself into a fluid orb around Unit-01's head is, I'm curious to know exactly how Misato realized that this was a self-destruct maneuver. Especially since the last time she personally witnessed an Angel's abilities was when she was still a teenager 15-years-ago during Second Impact...

Holy crap! The massive cross-shaped explosion that Sachiel generates when it self-destructs is not only breathtaking gorgeous, but it simultaneously adds further intrigue into whether or not the Angels are merely extraterrestrials or literal divine entities!

The feelings of sheer terror that this scene instilled within me were only further cemented by the aftermath of the battle, as Shinji briefly regains consciousness only to scream in horror at the building-side reflection of Unit-01’s head armor falling off and exposing its true fleshy face along with an eyeball that is absolutely in no way whatsoever is meant to resemble traditionally feminine anatomy (H.R. Geiger would eat his heart out over Unit-01’s eyeball here)!

Plus, I only just noticed this, but the front of EVA Unit-01's exposed forehead bears a striking resemblance to the masks on Sachiel's face, further hinting that the Evangelions and the Angels are biologically connected!

I absolutely adore the final moments of the episode where Misato continues to give Shinji faint praise even when she now realizes that it won’t help him. It simultaneously suggests that Misato still wants to do whatever she can to ease Shinji’s pain, while also desperately trying to find some way to justify Unit-01’s berserker rampage against Sachiel “being worth it” despite the traumatic toll the experience has inflicted upon Shinji’s psyche!

What an absolutely perfect way to end the episode! Allison Keith once again perfectly sells this scene through the way her voice so subtly cracks while trying to feign said-empty reassurance!

This concluding exchange also thematically ties the episode's corresponding titles, "Unfamiliar Ceiling" & "THE BEAST," so neatly together! In addition Shinji & Misato being haunted by memories of the literal beast in the form of EVA Unit-01, they're simultaneously confronted with metaphorical beasts as they struggle to process and adapt to unfamiliar enviornments and relationships!

I love it whenever titles convey multiple meanings like that!

Overall though, NGE, "Episode 2: Unfamiliar Ceiling/THE BEAST" still holds up incredibly dang well! Even better than I remember!

Heck, whenever I try to introduce other people to EVA for the first time, I always recommend that they watch Episodes 1 & 2 immediately back-to-back so that they can get a good idea of how this anime functions, since honestly both episodes work incredibly well as an hour-long pilot when watched together!

Now onto Episode 3!

[dhcmpirs]

Location: Courtyard Person: Forgive Me Father for I Have Sinned in the Coolest Ways Possible @adriannicodemus​

“So I need a favor.” Which wasn’t the way to address a man of the cloth, not really, and yet Kay had given himself the world’s biggest pep talk to just set foot in the damn church in the first place. Because the moment he’d taken the marshal job, he’d realized he was in close proximity to some of the most powerful vampires around. And while authority wasn’t ever something he cared for, he did know who sat on the Mars senate seat and to be in the same room as Adrian Nicodemus during senate meetings was one thing, but to be alone with him? He was a vampire and a Catholic priest and Kay was a child of the 90’s, the amount of religious imagery contrasted with alternative music and leather made this an incredibly interesting experience. He was operating under a lot of anxiety and the haze of a singular joint an hour ago. 

[elmira-kent]

Location: Reception Hall Person: @adriannicodemus​ If it weren’t for the mass of tulle and lace that made up the skirt of her gown, Elmira thinks she would feel weightless. Years of planning, months of moving things around as more and more happened in the city that had even amounted to growing irritation over the last few weeks that was very unlike her. If things hadn’t actually gone off without a hitch, she was adamant that she’d have become one of those bridezillas. But her friends had come through for her, she hadn’t had to worry about a thing aside from saying her vows and shooting off two texts to Marisol and Marius as she was getting ready to let them know that she was thinking of them, even if they couldn’t attend. “I can’t thank you enough, Father. The ceremony was everything I hoped it would be.”

[vibecheckcr]

Location: The Forum Person: @adriannicodemus​ It’s probably not very polite to drop in, probably anxiety-inducing to have him around period, and yet Romulus is there to do his job and he hopes the vampires on the senate understand that. That he is not there to intimidate, but to preserve what he had fought so hard to put together in the first place. It was not an easy job, being a senator, having the weight of a bloodline on your shoulders, he understood that completely. When Mars had given him and Remus their new life, he hadn’t quite known what that had meant, or perhaps the prophecy was already so heavy that he didn’t notice it. Still, he knocks at the door to the clerical office, hoping to catch the cardinal before he ventures to the catacombs to oversee them. “Do you have a moment?” They haven’t really had a chance to talk since the meeting after the disaster that was the wedding and while he stood by his decision to put his own bloodline in charge of the prison, he did need to make sure things were in order, that the senator wasn’t going to sit there sulking.

[campuscvtie]

“not to already sound like i’m complaining, but... i’m getting a little peckish.” audrina had been sticking to her unreasonably miserable vegan diet all semester so far, but since she wasn’t going home for the holidays, there would be no one to pinch her belly fat or care if she ate two slices of pumpkin pie. of course, she wasn’t interested in pigging out in front of adrian when he’d rented this whole beautiful house for the two of them. surely there was a happy medium. she was up on the counter, the sunset melting away to make way for the cool evening breeze as she leaned back on her palms, watching him curiously. she’d already gotten comfortable, by the looks of her stance, but that was partially because she was half dressed, a silk robe hanging from her shoulders and a lingerie set sitting underneath it that she’d changed into five minutes earlier. she could get used to this, being spoiled by him. “are you hungry?”           /          @lavndrhazed​

[da-ill-spot]

New Music: Hersh01 - Life Lyrics Vol. III, Healing The Hurt LP

Big shout out to Inland Empire based MC and fam, Hersh 01 with the recent release of his latest album, Life Lyrics Vol. III, Healing The Hurt.

It spans 11 tracks, co-produced by Spin-Sir and Cam The Producer, speaking on life issues, relationships, vulnerability, and spirituality. The standout track for me is "Da Cool."

Life Lyrics III is available on all major streaming platforms and includes features from Dvnchee, Ty Naps, Adrian, BnvkSinvtrv, and J West Da Intellect. Ch-check it!

[geekpopnews]

Senna | Minissérie de ficção inspirada na história de Ayrton Senna ganha teaser

O piloto mais rápido de todos os tempos! Confira o teaser da minissérie "Senna", que contará a história de vida do maior piloto brasileiro, Ayrton Senna. #Senna #AyrtonSenna #Netflix

A minissérie de ficção da Netflix, intitulada “Senna”, inspirada na história do piloto Ayrton Senna, acaba de ganhar teaser nesta terça-feira (30). O longa conta com Gabriel Leone dando vida ao maior piloto brasileiro, ao lado de Alice Wegmann e Kaya Scodelario. Ayrton Senna foi um piloto de Fórmula 1, considerado o piloto mais rápido de todos os tempos. Sendo assim, Ayrton é destaque quando se…

[gildedlife]

@eyeshone liked.

unlike his employers, james has not deluded himself into believing he will make a sale today. his company thinks itself to be forward-minded, forward-moving, despite being firmly planted in the past and motivated plainly by monetary trends it does not understand. space travel insurance could but be a lottery! they’d told him.

he’s been sat in a waiting area for hours, having been passed from one staffer to the next until he’d ultimately landed here, on an uncomfortable couch in an uncomfortable building. feeling desperate, at the very least for an excuse to leave, he climbs near-gracelessly to his feet at first sight of a person who seems to be moving at slightly less of a breakneck speed than the others.

‘ pardon me, ’ he says too loudly, flinching when it bounces off the walls and back inward. he can’t make the walk quickly enough to stop the man, so he’s thrown his voice out like a flare. ‘ is there a café? or, god’s sake, one person who will not pawn me off? ’