#adding to this conversation bc every post i see about it gives me such joy

[bylergetonefree]

literally nothing is funnier to me than the idea of el telling hopper that she and mike broke up and him being like “oh. sorry kid. a great decision tbh, but sorry” and then throwing himself a little party, and then like a month later will’s like “dad meet my boyfriend” and hopper just sits down and takes several very deep breaths because mike wheeler is somehow his future son in law again what the fuck

[ziracona]

Dwight/Jake wedding headcanons maybe? They deserve it.

For sure!

It’s a couple years down the road. They’ve been living in the Indiana house with Adam, while the others orbit in and out from Springwood and Lockport and Haddonfield and Indianapolis and Bloomington and New Jersey and Missouri and New York and such every few days. It’s peaceful and fun there for them. Woods, big house, familiar smells and people and memorobelia and Ron’s grave and markers added nearby for Vigo and Alex and Lisa and Sujan and the person from the lab with no name and the survivors who came before them and never got to be buried. It’s home. They’re just chilling, Dwight and Jake talking with intent but also very relaxed about something while Adam edits a sequel in his easy chair, deep in edit mode, when Jake calls over, “Hey Adam, do you want to be a best man, or do you want to marry us?”

Which Adam hears the wrong homophone for for a second and almost takes him out before he realizes they meant the other version of ‘marry’ and remembers how to breathe again.

He stutters out a, “Well, I, uh—I mean, I can do whichever you’d prefer, but I’m not ordained. In. Anything. I know I did Min and Nea’s, but—”

“—Yeah, we know, but we just need it to be legal,” Jake shrugs, “and we don’t want a stranger at the wedding period, so someone’s getting ordained.”

“I think you can get ordained online in like an hour,” adds Dwight helpfully, “and we’re not religious either, but—and now that I’m saying this it was Meg so that means I should make sure becuase sometimes her memory for numbers is uhhh bad, but she told me like a week ago you only need ten people to officially get your new religion recognized. And we could be ‘the survivors’ or something. I don’t know I believe in much, but I believe in that.”

Jake nods. “Whatever is true, this group of people can rip a hole in the fabric of the universe for each other. I’d ascribe to that.”

“I kind of like that,” says Adam, “I would too. But if we have a spiritual ‘leader’, wouldn’t Ace be a better choice than me? Or Jane?”

This is considered a good point and they debate between Adam, Jeff, Tapp, Jane, and Ace for a bit, [Philip is also briefly considered, but they realize just as fast he’d be overwhelmed and stressed by having to do it & mercifully swap him to another role], then decide on Ace, who’s always been the kind of...not exactly dad, not exactly uncle, but not not those things, and certainly some kind of an early spiritual or morale core for them, parentish figure, and a comfort and hope leader for them all. Also, they know he’ll get a fkn kick out of being ordained for this.

Dwight takes Quentin as his Best Man, Claudette his Maid of Honor, and Jake takes Nea as Matron of Honor, Andrew as Best Man, and Meg as Maid of Honor. They decide fuck it, and it’s kinda Parks & Rec (an argument used by and against Jake many times the next few weeks) anyway, and also both take Adam and Philip as Best Men because fuck it, it’s too hard and also wedding rules are arbitrary and made to be broken, and so then Jake adds Kate as a bridesmaid, Dwight adds Laurie, they realize the number of survivors is dwindling dangerously and decide fuck it, our wedding is for us might as well be fkn weird and cool, and add David, Min, Tapp, Jane, Jeff, and Laurie as groomsmen and bridesmaids too. This still leaves Michael, Anna, Sally, Benedict, Susie, Jeff’s three Legion kids, and everyone’s families which is like fkn a lot of people, to be audience party (sans Nancy, who is pleaded with to be wedding party and run the music pre-reception because the number of people that they want involved /and/ who won’t give in to or be tricked by Meg into some kind of terrible flash mob stunt is very small, and in fact, basically is just Nancy. She is happy to do it and thinks their desperate reasoning is hilarious).

They break the news to Meg and Claudette and Ace first (after Adam), ask Ace to marry them, and tell Meg she can run post-weddding/reception music however she wants, except the songs for a couples dance & parent dances. She is /thrilled/. Claudette is very happy and cries. They call up Quentin & Nea to add to the conversation and Jake says Nea and Meg and Susie are in charge of setting up the wedding because he knows they’re gonna fight him for the role anyway, but they have to throw whatever they can together with only the stuff they own already and $50, they want only family & the other survivors/their families at the wedding, the service short and sweet, and to have it at the cabin, by the river. Meg loses her mind with indignance and joy together, and goes buckwild. They hit thrift shops for fairy lights and streamers and more.

Everyone is thrilled to be asked, Jane says “about time,” and Philip can’t think of anything to say and gets overwhelmed emotionally and taken off guard to be asked to be a groomsman. It’s sweet. Everyone with fashion sense takes everyone else shopping or through their wardrobes for fun wedding clothes and to at least have accent pieces that match a color theme. (Complimentary blues, yellow/gold, and pinks to the grooms’. More on that). It’s super fun & they make a fashion show of it. There’s no matching in form, just color, which is just the best version anyway there’s really no goddamn reason to spend thousands of bucks on a wedding when you could just have a funky cute good time with the people who love you & no stress.

Jake picks a deep blue hanbok (bc the hottest Jake I’ve ever seen is the one @eggchef did for lunar new year & the note in the tags about an actual hanbok has been banging around in my head ever since), and when they’re going through stuff for Dwight, he comments a pink one is surprisingly nice because it’s not the color he’d expected to think about, and Jake remarks offhand that if they do deep blue and pink they’ll be stealing their girls’ looks, and the second he says that, they both know there’s no other choice now. Dwight gets a light pink suit and a tie that matches Jake’s blue. They’re adorable and both look exceedingly handsome.

The wedding is short and perfect. Ace does a great job, it’s a nice day, and Meg works wonders with her $50 budget and (notably obscenely large) preexisting store of party supplies, + help from her mom who is passing down the legacy of being the best tiny budget party planner on earth. It’s very open, but with near arches and dangling glass and prisims that cast rainbows everywhere, lots of meaningfully chosen for their blessings and symbolism flowers and flower chains from Claudette. It’s a little reminiscent of the birthday decorations Min and Nea did plus the prisims, and that accidentally makes all the survivors super emotional like 1 minute in.

Only the moms get to speak in the wedding (besides Ace and the grooms), and Andrew and Meg and Nea and Quentin and such all gotta save their roasts for the reception. It’s sweet. Ace knows them super well and it shows in the best way. The grooms write their own vows, and both echo their statements in the hatch tunnel without knowing the other was going to do so too. Jake starts with an “I am deeply, unendingly, ridiculously in love with you,” and Dwight brings in a, “I wouldn’t be who I am without you.” They end it with Dwight saying, “Will you still stay with me, now that it’s all over? Through whatever we’re thrown to next?” And Jake replying, “Wherever you go, I’ll always follow.”

I cry.

The reception is a party by the house. It’s just a huge prepared buffet made by the family who can cook, so no one has to sit and wait. Meg starts the music with Cascada’s Evacuate the Dance Floor because she doesn’t “want to see people dragging their feet like a bunch of fuckin weenies, I want asses on that dance floor!” There’s a lot of 90s and early 2000s pop, but also many many classic dance songs. Lots of ABBA. Lots of it. Everyone has great fun. Min, Nea, Susie, and Meg made the playlist, except for a few of the specific dances. Muriel Fairfield’s mother-son dance with Dwight is to Song For Ten by Neil Hannon because he knows she’s a sweet big emotional nerd and it’s the song she wants, and he’s willing to do it, and she sobs and is a mess but also the happiest she’s been since the day she got the call he was alive.

They have literally zero idea where they’re going when they drive off for a honeymoon. They’re like “Uhh so I’ve been looking at our complete and utter lack of wedding structure and planning as a good thing? But we might have overstepped that a little here....”

Dwight drives while Jake searches the web for LGBT safe honeymoon locations because there’s nothing that would ruin a trip more than that not working out, and reads off a list and Dwight is like, “Wait wait holy fuck, I though you meant what US cities or maybe Canada. Switzerland? Do we even have cash for the plane fare somewhere like that?” And Jake just looks at the page silently for a few seconds, shuts the laptop, and without expression says, “...I really hate this, but I’m gonna let myself be a rich boy, just once.”

They take Andrew’s jet to New Zealand (Jake calls him and listens for 2 minutes then just monotone goes “Okay but you owe me for being a dipshit for fifteen years,” and they get the ride). Jake picks a relaxed pace and some scuba diving, some hikes, but no overnight camping. Lots of just seeing the world and holding hands and grinning at how absolutely breathless and shocked Dwight is at every chunk of nature like nothing he’s seen before. They are disgustingly, blissfully happy.

[laurent-ofvere]

i'm sort of curious about your fic writing process. what do you start with? how do you get through tough parts? do you edit/revise? how do you know if an idea is worth writing?

WHY DOES EVERY ANSWER I EVER GIVE TURN INTO AN ESSAY IM SO ANNOYING YOU DONT CARE THAT MUCH 

1. when i first started writing fic i would start wherever i wanted, i would put down a scene that was currently in my head and then work around that. now i typically make myself write in chronological order, tho im not entirely sure why i restrict myself to it. i think its bc my writing consistency/interest has gone down considerably, and unlike before im more likely to drop something in the middle, so i dont allow myself to jump the gun bc im afraid ill write the parts that interest me most, and then be more inclined to let the fic go bc i got the fun bits out of my system. (but! i daydream the fic completely out of order, and i have notes of random lines/scenes that will happen that can span the entire thing. its all out of order and basically in gibberish code and would make sense to no one but me)

2. depends what you mean by tough parts. if its tough bc its one of those parts you dont care about/enjoy but just gotta get through, i basically do just that. its like dragging my feet but it needs to be done. if you mean tough like the mechanics of it are tough to write, ill write whatever i can and then just drop it, probably read over non related scenes and work on those, then come back with a fresh perspective and see what new ideas come to me. kinda like taking study breaks? when you spend hours going over one thing and reach a point where you’re like “i know what i know and at this point im going in circles” so you break for a while and when you pick it back up you can absorb it differently. its like that but im producing instead of consuming. also, ill occasionally just rant my head off to someone (i have a specific person for this) even if shes not online, ill just word vomit everything im thinking about the scene/situation and essentially have a long conversation with myself, and she’ll either help work through it bc we’re very likeminded on capri or ill reach a point in my yelling where it just clicks. 

3. FUCK yes i do. my first drafts are absolute garbage, if for whatever reason i send someone new a draft i give a paragraph long disclaimer like “ignore this and this and this and this and ITS GONNA BE EDITED I PROMISE” technical edits aside, the first version of my fics are like the skeleton of the story. single lines become paragraphs, small things get fleshed out, details get added etc. i add something new every time i re read, and i do the thing mentioned above with tough parts where i let it chill untouched for a while and then come back with fresh edits (slight lie, i dont leave it alone that long anymore, bc impatient and careless) 

4. i mean, how do you ever know? i wont lie, knowing that there are people who are interested and hype for it makes it worth it, but i‘d never write something i dont personally care about just bc others do, so its a steady combination. but i know its really worth writing if i truly have fun with it, if it sparks joy, if i think about it sporadically, all that. the first thing i wrote for nikandros pining over laurent was with no intentions of being posted, i just couldn’t stop thinking about it and writing those feelings out was fun and cathartic. 

[thedragontamerying]

Stand By Me

Long time no see! I’m sorry that I’ve been quiet for a couple of months, life has been really busy and just overall choatic for me. I’ve been trying to send stuff to a school I’m transferring to; I’ve been working frantically on art show works; we had to put one of our dogs down (RIP my big Beauty girl ;-;) and just recently an extended family member has been in the hospital. So yeah, I’ve been busy. But I have been working on writing on the periodic free time I’ve had and I’m ready to start posting again. So thank you for being patient and I hope you enjoy the newest chapters!

EDIT: I forgot to mention that Gallina in this chapter is @seal-pai‘s FFXV OC that I decided to add bc I love her and I do what I want. So if you’re interested in Gallina, go to seal-pai!

Tagging @insomniasix @theyearofdiamonddogs @zoeyredbird1 @seal-pai @ffxv-ocs-unite

Ch 1 <<< Ch 6 : Ch 8 | [Masterlist]

                                  Chapter VII: Where the Chocobos Run

It had been a couple of hours since the company had taken to the road again, leaving Cor and Monica to their own back in Leide. Artemisia was concerned about their whereabouts and doings, but Noctis insisted that they shouldn’t worry about them; the two could handle themselves. So to distract herself, she focused on the wonders of the Duscae region. The wind blew through the five’s hair, the atmosphere much more tolerable than before. The scenery that was once filled with desert sand and a scarcity of vegetation was replaced with mixes of green as far as the horizon and trees just as tall. The air no longer threatened to dry one’s skin if they left the top down too long. Instead, it was moist and refreshing thanks to the abundance of water in the region, something that Leide was lacking. Although, the humidity was no doubt going to be the source of many complaints from Noctis and Prompto, worried about their hair getting limp or frizzy. Artemisia couldn’t help the small huff of amusement at the thought.

“Look out world!” Prompto declared loudly from the front, startling Artemisia from her thoughts. “Here we come!”

“We can finally leave this dust bowl behind,” Gladiolus said with breath of relief.

“The lands beyond are vast by comparison to Leide.” Ignis stated, keeping his ever vigilante eyes on the road.

“Bigger’s better!” Prompto claimed with a saccharine tone, “More stuff to see and do.”

“First comes Duscae, a region known for its wetlands.”

“Really? Wetlands?” Noctis raised a brow at Ignis’ comment, failing to see the excitement in mucky water and mushy grass that sinks if you step on it the wrong way.

“Wetlands are really cool, Noct!” Artemisia urged, nudging his arm insistently.

“I think you’re the only person I know who finds grass cool.”

“No really! From an ecological standpoint, they’re really interesting! They’re one of the most biologically diverse biomes in the world, which means that so many different types of organisms can live together --” Gladiolus watched Artemisia go on her enthusiastic lecture, occasionally listening in on what she was saying out of genuine interest, but mostly enjoying Noctis’ bored and desperate look for escape. “-- And they’re so important when it comes to naturally purifying water. But they’re also really sensitive to pollution, which means that scientists can see early effects of pollution by studying how it affects wetlan-- MMPH!”

Gladiolus quieted her by covering Artemisia’s mouth -- and almost her entire face -- with his hand, pulling her into a playful headlock against his chest. “Okay nerd, we get it.” He smirked when she half-heartedly glared up at him, relinquishing his hold on her and letting Artemisia straighten her posture back to normal.

“Besides the ever exciting ecosystems,” Ignis gave a teasing look to Artemisia from the rearview mirror, “There’s also a chocobo forest.”

“Now we’re talking!” Prompto chimed in.

“Further west lies the Cleigne region, where we’ll find the town of Lestallum.”

“Oh, isn’t that where Iris is heading?” Prompto ask, turning in his seat to look at Gladiolus, as did the other two in the back. Ever since Insomnia’s destruction Gladiolus’ worry over his sister had been obvious. The two had always been close, what with Gladiolus practically raising Iris himself due to their father’s work making him absent a lot. During the trip Artemisia had caught him texting who she assumed was Iris, noting that he had been texting more since the news of their home.

Gladiolus glanced down at his phone before looking back at the others, the usual strength in his eyes. “Barring delays, she should have arrived by now.” He sighed, looking off to the horizon, “Maybe even had herself a look at the meteor.”

“The Meteor of the Six?”

“The same,” Ignis answered Noctis, “Its heat is harnessed to power Lestallum.”

“Whoa, that sounds way cool!” Prompto said, his interest piqued.

Noctis nudged Artemisia. “You going to explain how that works?”

“Would you actually be interested in the complexities that go into making a meteor into electrical power for a whole city?”

“Probably not…”

“Then I’m not going to bother.” Artemisia huffed, a stubborn pout on her lips.

Gladiolus chuckled at the two. “I’m actually looking forward to this.”

After a while more on the road, Ignis spotted a gas station and suggested that they refill the tank. “It will be a long drive.” The group pulled into the station, parking the Regalia next to one of the gas tanks. Everyone exited the car and took a moment to stretch their muscles, having been stuck in the small space for a couple of hours. Artemisia offered to fill the tank while Ignis and Gladiolus visit the shop to buy more potions. Prompto insisted on Noctis posing for a photo, stating that their first steps into the unknown should be documented. One photo turned into another which turned into a whole photoshoot, with Prompto wandering around with his camera and snapping anything he could find interesting. Artemisia failed to see the general interest in a photo of her filling the car’s tank, but she wasn’t going to get in the way of an artist and his muse.

Artemisia had just returned the gas pump to its original place -- she didn’t understand why Noctis always has to grunt when he takes care of the gas; the pump wasn’t heavy -- when a ringtone from Noctis’ phone went off. “Who could this be?” Noctis answered the phone right as Gladiolus and Ignis returned. “Hello?” Gladiolus gave a slight jerk to his head towards Noctis while giving Artemisia questioning eyes. Artemisia could only shrug unknowingly. “Iris?”

That caught Gladiolus’ attention. Him and the rest waited patiently as Noctis continued his conversation. He soon ended the call with a quick “Will do.”

“Was that Iris?” Gladiolus asked, stepping closer to his friend. Gladiolus sighed once Noctis nodded, before crossing his arms and giving a small huff. “Can’t even call her own brother…”

“In all fairness,” Ignis interjected, “Yours wasn’t in the obituary broadcasted all over Lucis.”

“What about me?” Prompto questioned hopefully, “She say anything about me?

“Guys,” Artemisia laughed, “Don’t worry, you’re all beautiful. Now why don’t we get a move on so we can meet up with her.”

Gladiolus was quick to agree, packing away their purchases in the trunk so that they could get on the road again. Noctis was about to go take his usual seat when Prompto grabbed his shoulder and turned him around. “See that sign?” Prompto pointed out further down the road at a giant billboard. The board had a large yellow bird on it and read Wiz Chocobo Post. “Chocobos! Chocobos!” He chanted excitedly, his voice dripping with utter joy. The enthusiasm was contagious as Noctis’ eyes were filled with the same interest as his friend’s.

“Hey, no time for that,” Gladiolus quickly shot back, shutting the trunk with a satisfying thud. “We need to get to Lestallum.”

“It’s still ages away. C’mon, just a quick visit?” Prompto pleaded. He looked over at Artemisia with a quick turn of his head before dragging her to his side, making Artemisia blink in confusion. “Back me up, Artemis! One chocobo lover to another.”

“Uh…” Artemisia interrupted, “Actually, I’ve never seen a chocobo.”

Prompto gasped, dramatically grasping his shirt over his heart as though he had been shot. “What?!”

“Okay, even I’m surprised by that.” Gladiolus added.

“Well w-we have to go now!” Prompto insisted with urgency. “We can’t let her be deprived of the joys of chocobos! Twenty-one years of life and none of it spent with chocobos is a crime! C’mon Noct!”

Noctis shrugged, “He’s got a point.”

“Whoo hoo! Chocobos here we come!”

Artemisia glanced over at Gladiolus, seeing the concern for his sister still present in his eyes despite how he was trying to cover it up. He seemed willing to make the stop at the chocobo ranch, but he obviously wanted to get to Lestallum as fast as possible. “Let’s make it a quick trip at least, guys. We really should get to Lestallum soon,” she insisted.

“Deal! Now c’mon, let’s go!”

With Prompto ushering everyone back to the car, the group was on the road again. They followed the directions provided by the multiple signs along the road, arrows indicating what turns to take. The entire way Prompto was going every mile to display his excitement to see the giant, friendly birds. He had turned on a very hokey pokey song on the radio that was about the creatures with him humming along to it with lyrics like ‘I want to ride my chocobo all day’. It was after the others had asked him to stop his singing that Prompto turned to look at Artemisia in the back seat. “I can’t believe that you don’t know what chocobos are. I would have thought you would have been all over them.”

Artemisia pouted. “I know what chocobos are, I just haven’t gotten the chance to see one in person.” Her busy schedule didn’t leave much room for miscellaneous adventures or outings unless it was either with Ismene or Noctis. Those outings were also a rarity considering that Ismene focused more with academic studies and Noctis always had Gladiolus or Ignis with him as his entourage.

“Well that’s all about to change.” Prompto pointed at another sign, this one including the word Entrance on it. “Here we are!”

Driving off of the main road and down a dirt path, the group came upon the ranch. It was a quant little abode, with a small windmill and tiny picket fence nearby at the front -- most likely where the chicks would go. Behind that was the business building, where a small shop was placed for chocobo lovers to buy antiques, or feed for their feathery friends. In front of that were some umbrella tables for customers to enjoy a meal while watching the animals. To the left were some storage buildings where the birds’ food and water was most likely being held, and to the right were some posts where the birds would be tied to interact with any visitors. The only thing that was missing from this chocobo ranch were the actual chocobos. There was no hide nor feather of the creatures; it’s hardly possible for them to be hiding, the birds were larger than most people.

“Odd…” Ignis mumbled.

“Do you think that they’re closed?” Artemisia asked.

“No way, chocobo ranches don’t close.” Prompto confidently answered. “Maybe they’re just giving them a break from the crowd. It’s hard being a celebrity, y’know.” Prompto joked, gesturing for the others to follow him. “C’mon, let’s go get us some chocobos.” The group followed him to this older man who was working around the meal tables. “ ‘Scuse me,” the man turned around after hearing Prompto’s voice, a name badge on his outfit reading Rancher Wiz. “We’d like to ride the chocobos.”

“The chocobos, huh?” Wiz sighed, a disappointed frown on his face. “I hate to break this to y’all but we can’t permit our birds to leave the post, not while Deadeye’s still about.”

“Deadeye?” Artemisia questioned.

Wiz nodded. “He’s an uncommonly ferocious behemoth that’s taken to prowlin’ these parts of late. His scent makes our birds nervous, and to prevent accidents or tragedies, we have no choice but to suspend rentals.”

“Aw man,” Prompto pouted degernatedly. Noctis also looked incredibly disappointed at the situation. Artemisia rubbed Prompto’s shoulder, trying to comfort him. “I’m sorry guys, but we can always come back later. Hopefully the behemoth will move on.” Wiz stared at the group inquizitively, his eyes narrow in thought before it dawned on him. “Hold on now, ain’t you the hunters that’ve been makin’ a mark?”

The five looked at each other confused, unaware of their recent claims to notoriety. “It would seem so…” Ignis answered.

Wiz tore down a flyer from the nearby notice board where bounties for hunts were presented and handed it to Noctis. It had a rough photo of a behemoth on it and a listing of a reward for the creature dubbed Deadeye. “You reckon you could handle the likes of Deadeye?” Noctis showed the others the bounty, “If you could bring the beast down, there’d be a reward in it for ya.” The group was always in need of more money, that’s for sure. “But knowin’ the danger, I wouldn’t blame ya for saying no.”

“What do you guys think?” Noctis asked, though his smile showed that his mind was already set. “We up for it?”

Gladiolus smirked. “Go big or go home, right?”

“Rest assured,” Ignis directed at Wiz, “You nor your birds will have none to fear once we are done.”

Wiz thanked them for their courageous service, giving directions on where the beast was last seen on Artemisia’s map. Once the group felt like they had everything they needed to know, they set out in the dense woods beyond the ranch. They followed the small dirt path through the forest until the path started to disappear as they moved further in. The edge of the trail was overridden by grass and weed due to the lack of explorers that venture out that far. So the group had to rely on any signs of the beast that they could find to direct them.

“Are we sure we’re going the right way?” Prompto asked, no doubt the ominous atmosphere of the forest making him nervous. The trees were so large and close together that it barely allowed any sunlight to shine through the collection of leafs at the top. And with the knowledge of a famously dangerous creature prowling the area, Artemisia couldn’t blame him for feeling intimidated.

Gladiolus, who was at the front of the group, took in the area before confirming “Oh yeah, we’re heading the right direction.” He gestured to large claw marks that were left in the large rock formation to their left. Prompto gulped at the sight.

Suddenly a blood curdling howl echoed through the area, the group flinching at the sound. “The hell?” Gladiolus growled, reframing from summoning his weapon but ready for action if need be. Birds flew above them as the sound of trees breaking and falling to the ground followed the howl. “Something’s amiss.” Ignis said, his guard up as well.

“We’re getting closer. Everyone stick together.” Artemisia instructed, slowly walking ahead as the others followed.

As the group traveled deeper into the forest they found more evidence of the behemoth’s presence. Claw marks and broken trees littered the ground, and growls echoed out as they walked, each one louder than the other. Artemisia decided not to the alert the others to a small pool of dried blood that she saw, not wanting to put them on edge even more; though her heartbeat definitely picked up after the sight. The further they traveled into the forest -- and closer to Deadeye -- the area became encased in fog, making visibility poor.

“So, Artemis,” Prompto walked closer to her, “as our residential beast master,” Artemisia wasn’t sure if she considered herself that, “got any advice for us?”

“Well… from what I understand, behemoths rely heavily on their sight and sense of smell since their hearing is horrible. And if the name implies, the fact that this one has a bad eye is actually a small advantage for us.” Another crash from a falling tree sounded out. “And we’ll definitely hear it coming before it hears us.” Prompto gave a weak smile, not sure if she helped his nerves or not.

“Don’t worry, Artemis isn’t gonna let us get eaten.” Noctis reassured, confidence all over his expression. “She’s got this.”

“Uh… Right.”

What am I suppose to do I can’t stop a claw that weighs over a ton from slicing right through you better hope that you see it first because you can’t outrun that thing oh by the Six that thing could snatch Noct out of the air with its giant teeth without a second thought if he’s not fast enough oh Astrals why did we do this why did we do this

They followed what evidence of the behemoth they could find through the fog, coming upon a small man-made cavern created by a huge, abandoned construction pipe. It was big enough for someone to crawl through, if one was willing to uncomfortably arch their back or scrape their boney knees on a hard surface that will more than likely result in bruising. Not to mention the idea of being trapped in a small space with a ginormous predator on the prowl wasn’t a pleasant one. But there was no way forward that didn’t involve going through the pipe, so it’s a risk they’ll have to take.

“Noct, wait!” Noctis was about to be the first to enter the pipe when another roar from Deadeye rang, this time it was close enough that the growl vibrated through the metal under Noctis’ hand. Gladiolus had stopped the prince in his tracks, holding his arm out in a protective stance to keep Noctis back from the potential danger. He looked into the dark pipe, investigating for any sign of the beast that was nearby. Artemisia poked her head under his arm to look too, only seeing some vegetation that was able to grow inside the pipe despite the small amount of sunlight. She gulped, taking a deep inhale of breath before slowly exhaling and ducking under the taller man’s arm and heading in first. “Hey,” Gladiolus whispered, urging her to come back behind him. Another growl vibrating down the pipe silenced them. Artemisia waited until it was quiet again, making sure the behemoth had moved on before looking back to the others and gesturing for them to follow. “Stay close.”

Gladiolus released a frustrated huff of air before following her, with the others close behind him. They crawled down the tight clearing, turning along with path. The pipe lead out to another small cavern, this one created with sheets of metal acting as a barrier around them. Whatever they were planning on making here that included such an uncomfortable walking space Artemisia had no clue. She was thankful for the bit of cover though, no matter how much it has degraded over time. Artemisia looked back at the others, checking on them when she heard heavy footsteps coming closer. She jumped forward to the other side of a small hole to where secure cover was, giving Gladiolus a signal to stay put.

“Hold up,” Gladiolus instructed. Soon a behemoth stood just inches away from the group, letting out a roar as it sniffed the air. The beast’s right eye had a scar going down its face and its eye was clouded over, no longer useful. “Deadeye,” Gladiolus pointed to his own eye, “The name says it all.”

Deadeye sniffed their direction inquisitively. Artemisia worried that they had been found before the behemoth looked away, grabbing something in its jaws and starting to feast on it. Based off of the sounds of muscle tearing and bones breaking, Artemisia had an idea as to what preoccupied the beast’s focus for now. She let out a shaky sigh, thankful that it wasn’t one of them. She glanced over to check on the gorging animal before waving her hand in a motion to follow her. Gladiolus nodded, giving the others the same instructions.

The group slowly started to crawl passed the giant beast as it ate, being cautious as to not tip off Deadeye to their presence. Artemisia peeked back to double check that it was still distracted before she started to move ahead, another large hole above her as the protective metal sheets were no longer there. As she crawled she noticed the end of tunnel, breathing a quick sigh of relief.

“Artemis!”

Artemisia whipped her head around when she heard the alarm in Noctis’ voice, seeing the large teeth coming down towards her at the last second. Before Deadeye’s jaws could clamp down on her person she was tackled out of the way, soon finding herself face down in the dirt with a large weight on top of her. Her protests were muffled by the soil as she pawed at the hand on top of her head, taking in a deep breath and spitting out grass once she finally was able to lift it off. “Gladi--”

Gladiolus shushed her, caging her under him as he stared ahead. Artemisia held her breath when she noticed how close Deadeye’s blood stained teeth were as it sniffed down into the tunnel. She could smell its putrid breath, a nauseous mix of the creature’s mouth bacteria and the remains of its recent kill. Noctis and the others were on the other side, eyes wide and frozen to their spots. Ignis had his hand over Prompto’s mouth to keep the blonde from screaming.

Deadeye removed its jaws from the hole and roared above it, splats of its saliva hitting the five’s faces as its breath sent their hair back. It inspected the area once more before walking away with a low growl. Artemisia released the air she didn’t know she was holding once the beast was gone, taking deep breaths to calm her rapid heartbeat.

“Thanks for the save.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“...” She squirmed uncomfortably under him. “Could you get off of me now?”

“Oh,” Gladiolus flinched, realizing how awkward her position was before carefully crawling off, “Sorry.”

The group made it to the tunnel’s end, Artemisia peeking outside first to make sure the behemoth wasn’t closeby before exiting. Everyone stretched once out, their limbs sore from being in such a restricting space. Another familiar growl interrupted the small moment of relief, the group being on the defensive once again as they moved on. This area of the forest had even worse fog than before, reducing visibility to only several feet.

“It’s weak on its right,” Gladiolus informed, “No eye, no horn.”

“We’ll stay in range until we can exploit its blind spot.” Ignis instructed as they carefully moved through the mist.

They moved onward, following the sounds of the beast. The group came upon a clearing of the forest that had large boulders laid out around the area; most likely the rocks had come down from the nearby cliff side, or perhaps Deadeye had moved them there itself. Moving closer, they saw a shadow move amongst the rubble, revealing a tail as the shadow moved. “We got the beast in our sights.”

“But no plan of attack,” Ignis added to Gladiolus’ comment, “The behemoth should be heading back to its lair, where we can catch it fully off guard.”

“Yeah,” Noctis grumbled, “As long as we stay on guard ourselves.”

“If we stay to its right and use the rocks and trees for cover, we should be able to follow it unseen.” Artemisia added. Agreeing, Ignis took the front, leading the group through the mist. He carefully navigated the group close behind Deadeye, using the beast’s tail as an indication to the creature’s location. There were a few times that the creature’s tail was almost within reach, close enough for someone to reach out with their hand. One false move, one accidental brush and the beast would know they were there. One eye or not, the five would be easily taken down by the giant in the thick fog.

The group was in the middle of crossing the clearing, hopping behind cover from one large rock to the other when the behemoth stopped in its tracks. Gladiolus and Prompto hurried over to cover with Ignis, but Artemisia froze in the middle of the clearing as the beast sniffed the air. A deep growl vibrated down its throat as it turned to its right, looking with its good eye. Artemisia pushed Noctis back behind the previous boulder, avoiding Deadeye’s view in time. Deadeye approached them, its large head sniffing the clearing where Artemisia stood just a moment ago. Ignis and the others moved to avoid its left eye, but Artemisia and Noctis stood still as it continued to sniff out their scent.

Artemisia held her breath as she guided Noctis to walk backwards with a gentle push of her hand against his chest. They stayed light on their feet as they backed away, trying not to disturb anything that would give them away. The water in the air must of made finding their individual scent difficult to track as the behemoth took its time.

With one more big sniff, Deadeye slowly turning its head towards the two stranded friends.

Except there was no prey.

Noctis, in the nick of time, had pulled Artemisia down with him into a large patch of tall grass. The two laid on their stomachs, completely engulfed by the long whisks of turf.

The behemoth growled, searching for what had caused the faint scent it had caught, baring its teeth before huffing out through its nose. Seeming to have given up on the hunt, the beast turned around and continue onward to its lair. Artemisia and Noctis slowly rose from their hiding spot once the predator left, disappearing into the fog. The two hurried across to join the others.

“Are you alright?” Ignis asked, brushing them both off the best he could.

“Yeah, we’re good…” Noctis shivered.

“J-Just… really cold now.” Artemisia trembled, trying to stop her teeth from chattering. In the heat of the moment the two failed to see the large amount of mud accumulating in the patch of grass they hid in. Now that they were no longer fearing for their lives, they suddenly became very aware of the chilling muck now plastered to their uniforms.

“At least you’re alive.” Prompto tried to brighten their spirits, though there wasn’t much he could do besides possibly hugging them to warm them up. But he’d rather not get any of that on himself.

“Once we get back to the post we’ll see if Wiz would be kind enough to lend us a washing machine.” Ignis said handing the two handkerchiefs to wipe the mud off their faces. “If they have one, that is.”

“Until then you’ll have to warm yourself up with the heat of battle.”

They both whined at Gladiolus.

The two tried to clean themselves off the best they could with what they had before moving on to find Deadeye, baring with the uncomfortable sensation of their slick clothes sticking to their bodies. When they last checked, Deadeye had hopped over a wall of rock formations before disappearing into the mist. The group followed, squeezing through a tight crevice through the rocks. Once through to the other side the five found themselves in an abandoned, decrepit building. The metal foundation bars of the would-be structure were exposed now due to the decaying concrete falling off its support. Even the entryway was nothing more than an outline of where a door would be. From the there, the company hopped down to lower terrain in what looks like a potential future storage room. Now, all that remained was an wide open area where the behemoth -- who had to be close due to the audible hisses -- decided to make his home.

They stepped carefully, investigating the tree line for any movement that indicated their target. As they moved cautiously, the mist had slowly started to dissipate, allowing Artemisia to notice several barrels sprawled around the area. Noctis had accidentally walked next to one and looked it over before flinching back as though the object had burned him. “Heads up,” Noctis announced, pointing to a caution sign on the barrel. “The barrels are flammable.”

“Eyes forward,” Gladiolus said, pointing to the forest in the distance. Trees snapped as a hulking figure moved through the woods, a familiar one eye zoning in on the group of friends. “We got company.”

The behemoth let out a blood curdling roar, baring its teeth as it leaped down to their level and crushed a barrel with its claws. The oil broke free and stained Deadeye’s foot. Noctis motioned for everyone to step back once they summoned their weapons, breaking out a magical flask filled with elemental fire magic. He chucked the flask at Deadeye’s slick foot, the fire igniting the oil on the beast and catching its clawed paw in flames. Deadeye cried out at the pain, stomping its foot against the ground to kill the fire. The weak fire only seemed to have agitated the creature more as it charged at the group with no hesitation.

The team separated, avoiding the lunging beast. Deadeye turned mid landing, causing it to skid until it hit what remained of one of the walls of the would be storage area. Some of the concrete fell on top of the behemoth, aggravating it even more. The bad landing had caused Deadeye to destroy more barrels, spraying more flammable grease on its body and causing the predator to slip before charging again.

Everyone scurried away from the rampaging beast like mice avoiding the prowling feline; ironically fitting. Deadeye ran after the group, changing its focus from person to person depending on who was closest. Noctis warped away from its attack while Prompto fired at it as he ran, frantically calling for help. “Prompto!” Gladiolus signalled his friend, charging his direction with his sword at the ready. Deadeye’s jaws almost caught Prompto before he fell to the ground, skidding under Gladiolus’ sword before he brought it up in a uppercut, slicing the behemoth’s face. Noctis warped on to the back of Deadeye’s neck, stabbing the muscle with his longsword. Deadeye roared and reared back on its hind legs, sending Noctis flying back despite his best attempts to stay on.

“Noct!” Artemisia and Ignis ran to their fallen friend, helping him up. “Are you okay?”

Noctis pushed away Ignis’ worried hands, forcing himself up. “I’m fine… Would have been better if it had gone down with that first barrel.”

“Your idea was in the right direction,” Ignis assured, “Unfortunately, it didn’t have the impact that we were hoping for.”

“We need more firepower if we’re going to take it down.” Artemisia looked over to where Deadeye had originally slipped, oil everywhere and a huge dent in the unfinished wall with small plates of concrete falling off. Ignis followed her line of sight, taking in the setting too before the two nodded to each other. “Noct,” Artemisia put her hand on his shoulder, “We need you and Gladio to keep it busy while we set up.”

“That’s a big order just for the two of us.” Noctis complained. “What are you setting up for?”

“Why for your original plan to flourish, of course.” Ignis explained, “You and Gladio will keep the beast distracted while we collect more barrels. Once we have enough the two of you will corral it to the spot and then--”

“Boom.”

“Precisely.”

Gladiolus summoned his shield, his only barrier against Deadeye’s claws pushing down on him. “Make it quick.” Noctis groaned before warping at the beast again to help his struggling companion. Ignis and Artemisia hurried to collect what they needed, grabbing Prompto to help. They dodged the hulking behemoth as they ran back and forth, carrying the bins over to the targeted area against the wall. Gladiolus and Noctis kept the beast off of their busy friends, baiting it away from the others and trying to survive in the meantime.

“Whoops!” Prompto rolled the last barrel over, accidentally kicking it over and spilling the contents onto the ground.

“Don’t worry, we should be good to go.” Artemisia secured a barrel against the wall, signalling Ignis. Ignis nodded, joining Noctis and Gladiolus with his daggers ready while Artemisia and Prompto secured themselves on higher terrain. “Corral the beast back against the wall. Artemis and Prompto are at the ready.”

Following the Strategist’s orders, the three men gradually forced the beast back towards the targeted area. The pooled oil was making Deadeye’s feet unsteady and the fluid was coating most of the creature’s body due to its thrashful movements as it fought back. Gladiolus forced Deadeye back against the wall with a strong push from his shield, surrounding the beast with the collected barrels. “Now!” Ignis yelled out to their far ranged companions as he, Noctis and Gladiolus hurried away from oil.

Artemisia smashed a fire flask against her crossbow, encasing her arrows in the magic before Prompto and her shot down at the barrels. Two explosions rang out before they caused a chain of explosions from all of the barrels, throwing Deadeye against the wall behind it. Deadeye cried out in pain as its whole body was engulfed in flames, the oil luring the rampant fire like food for a starving animal. Despite Deadeye’s attempts to run away from the fire, the ground was still soaked and in its frenzy Deadeye couldn’t manage to control its legs well enough to escape the burning pain raking up its body. Artemisia couldn’t help the sympathetic grimace, turning her head away from the scene. If her and Prompto could feel the heat from their perch, she could only imagine what agony the poor creature was in.

Soon the oil was all burned away, scorches left on the ground where grass once was. Deadeye, just barely standing, was covered in horrendous burns and embers still lingered on it. Deadeye breathed heavily as it tried to force itself upright but its legs were burned beyond use, having taken the brunt force of the fire. Noctis, Ignis and Gladiolus approached the pained creature, their weapons still on their persons. Deadeye growled at them, defensive in its weakened state.

With what strength the behemoth had left, it let out another mighty roar, trying to intimidate the others away. Rubble from the wall fell on top of its head, with bigger chunks starting to come down on Deadeye’s head. The explosion had created a deep crack in the wall’s concrete and Deadeye’s roar vibrated up the weakened structure. The wall broke apart, all of the concrete falling on Deadeye.

A large dust cloud erupted, hiding Deadeye and stinging everyone else’s eyes as the impact kicked up dirt. Noctis and the other two rubbed their eyes, blinking away the debris. The dust started to clear, revealing what was left from the collapse. A large claw laid motionless under a hill of rubble, all signs of life absent.

“Magnificent,” Ignis sighed, dusting himself off. Artemisia and Prompto joined the others on the ground, the three taking a moment to breathe. “Nicely done you two. We’ve taken down the target without nary a flame on ourselves.”

“I’m honestly surprised that we didn’t,” Gladiolus touched his forehead lightly, “Pretty sure the tips of my eyebrows burned off.”

“Huh, sounds like that would an improvement to me.” Noctis joked, him and Prompto laughing at his little jab at the big man’s equally burly brows. Gladiolus raised one of said brows, staring down at the laughing two. With a flick of the wrist he pushed the prince, causing Noctis to fall again into the wet dirt below him with a splat. Now it was Gladiolus’ turn for a laugh; Prompto quickly redirected his laughter at his bestie. Meanwhile, Ignis and Artemisia looked on like two tired parents with their rowdy kids. Noctis lifted himself up from the muck with a groan, the earlier discomfort from the first layer of mud coming back ten fold. Artemisia felt an empathetic chill go up her arms; the fight hadn’t warmed her up as much as Gladiolus had said it would. If anything the addition of sweat and the diminishing effects of adrenaline made her feel even colder.

Ignis sighed as he helped Noctis off the ground. “Now you’ll really need to bathe.”

We all do…

Noctis tried to wipe off the dirt on him, only spreading it across his face. “Then we should get back now.”

They could all agree to that.

By the time the group made their way back to the chocobo ranch, the sun had made its slow descent down the horizon, coloring the sky in blues and pinks. Hopefully Wiz would still allow them to see the chocobos despite the early evening sun. Artemisia wasn’t sure what time chocobos usually fall asleep but if Prompto didn’t get to pet some chocobos today, the poor boy might cry. He had been singing the earlier chocobo song almost the entire walk back, the excitement in his eyes overflowing.

Wiz noticed the group coming, meeting them by an umbrella table. He looked at them expectantly, waiting to see what news they brought with their arrival. Artemisia reached into her small belt pouch, handing Wiz a small chip of the dead behemoth’s claw. Wiz’s face broke into a giant smile. “Ya guys did it! You took down Deadeye! The area’s safe again an’ we owe it all to you.” He took Noctis’ hand, not minding the dirt and grim on it, and gave it a firm shake. “On behalf of the locals, I give ya my heartfelt thanks.”

“So…” Prompto scooted forward, “About the chocobos…”

Wiz laughed. “Our birds are at your disposal. You can rent them any time you like.”

“Can we ride some now?”

Wiz hummed, looking at the clock on his wrist before tipping his hat. “I reckon there’s enough time before dark for our heroes to get a few laps in. Let me get some out for ya.” He snapped his fingers. “In fact, since y’all risked so much for us, why don’t ya stay the night at the caravan and have some supper with me and the others? My treat.”

The five were quick to accept the offer; who were they to decline free food and a warm place to sleep. “We appreciate your hospitality.” Ignis thanked him. “If we could trouble you with another thing.” He presented Noctis and Artemisia in their dirty state. “Do you have a washer we could borrow?”

Wiz laughed. “Son, we live on a chocobo ranch. ‘F we didn’t have some kind of machine we wouldn’t look much different than the chocobos themselves. I’ll find you two some clothes to borrow while we throw those in for a cleanin’.” He looked at Prompto. “And I’ll see about those chocobos.”

“Alright!” Prompto squealed, practically jumping with joy. Artemisia envied his enthusiasm, the chill from her dirty clothes making her feel lethargic.

“Gallina!” Wiz called out, peeking through a door that led to the chocobo stalls. “We’re gonna need five birds. Do you have any spare clothes, too?” Him and this Gallina continued talking through the door before a loud kweh rang out. Soon a train of squawking and kwehs followed the first. Prompto grabbed Artemisia, forgetting about the crusty mud on her, and pulled her closer to the small pasture for the birds. “Get ready to be amazed, Artemis!”

Quick flashes of yellow ran past Artemisia’s eyes, all squawking and feathers abundant. Five of the giant birds ran together along the fence that caged them in the pasture, flapping their small wings excitedly as though to simulate flying. A few were leaping into the air, almost skipping as they ran. The birds were big enough that they could easily jump over the fence and run off if they wanted to, but they seemed more than happy to stay in their enclosure. “No jumping!” A woman’s voice called out to the birds. “One of you is gonna fall over the fence again and then no one will be happy.”

The woman walked out of the stall into the pasture; she must be the woman that Wiz was talking to. The woman, Gallina, definitely looked like someone who dealt with chocobos. While she was nowhere near Gladiolus’ muscle definition, she had a solid build with strong shoulders and thick limbs that no doubt could handle a thrashing chocobo. She had her giant, wild hair tied back in a ponytail that reached her rear, pieces of hay and various greens sticking out occasionally. And despite her uniform, there were various visible scars on her person, the most obvious and painful looking ones were the many that covered the majority of her face. Artemisia had never thought of chocobos as violent creatures but even the most tamed animals could be dangerous, especially the ones the tower over most people and were equipped with sharp talons.

Gallina walked over to the group, leaning against the fence. “You the group that Wiz said took down Deadeye?” The five nodded. “Well thanks for that. You have no idea how antsy the birds were the entire time that beast was around.” She looked back at the birds, some were still running in circles while a few ruffled their feathers against the grass, causing their feathers to puff up adorably. “All of that,” she pointed at the happy birds, “Is thanks to you guys.” She opened the hatch on the fence, opening the small gate. “So you ready to ride them?”

“Oh yeah we are!”

Ignis held back the excited Noctis by the back of his neck line. “My apologies, but these two need to bathe first.” He gestured to Artemisia as well.

Gallina blinked. “Oh! That’s why Wiz was asking about uniforms.” She started walking back to the stalls. “Give me one minute and I’ll set you up with a clean pair of clothes.” She was gone for a moment before coming back out with two sets of absurdly yellow clothes. “I know they’re not exactly high fashion, but they’re comfy. I can take your other clothes once you two are done showering. In the meantime,” she looked down at Prompto, who was giving her the biggest sad puppy eyes ever, “The rest of you are welcome to the birds.”

Prompto practically ran into the pen, chanting the birds over to get their attention. Gallina laughed at his enthusiasm; he was fitting in with the chocobos nicely.

“Noct, do you need any assistance?”

“With showering?” Noctis scoffed at Ignis. “I’m not a baby. It’s not like I’m gonna drown in there.”

“Stranger deaths have happened.” Ignis muttered before casually following Prompto. “Just be sure to clean thoroughly.”

A tint of embarrassment colored Noctis’ cheeks as he coughed awkwardly. He looked at Artemisia and vomited out a quick “I’m showering first” before dashing to the caravan before Artemisia could even react.

Artemisia sighed, rubbing her hands over her arms in an effort to warm herself. She couldn’t be mad at him for rushing for the shower, he was twice as dirty as she was. Unfortunately that meant she was going to have to wait until he was done. While her small stature was useful for combat, it wasn’t the best at keeping herself warm. No doubt Noctis was going to soak up the caravan’s limited hot water, too. She felt like it was fair enough for her to be peeved about that.

She suddenly felt a warm weight on top of her shoulders. She looked down and saw Gladiolus’ leather Crownsguard jacket draped over her shoulders, the size difference hilariously noticeable. She looked at Gladiolus, who’s decorated torso was now bare for all to see. “Thanks, but won’t you be cold too?”

“Don’t worry about it, I got my shirt in the trunk.” He assured, patting her on the head before walking away to where the Regalia was parked. Artemisia could see the many stares by the various ranch workers directed at him as the man walked past them to the car. He didn’t seem to mind, especially since the flustered stares and embarrassed giggles only boosted his ego more.

“Heh...”

Artemisia looked back at Gallina, who was leaning on the fence and supporting her head with her hand against her cheek. She had a giant grin on her scared face, directing it at the red head before her. Artemisia blinked curiously. “What?”

“Oh nothing, nothing,” Gallina chuckled. “Hey, we have a couple of showers inside if you want to use one of them. Better than standing around cold, right?”

“Yes, thank you!”

Gallina called for another post worker to watch the chocobos with Prompto and Ignis before she led Artemisia inside. They passed by the few other chocobos that remained in their stalls, Gallina petting them on the heads as they continued. “This your first time here?”

“Yeah, first time with chocobos too.” Artemisia admitted.

“Really?” Gallina looked back at Artemisia over her shoulder. “Huh… Well there’s a first for everything.” Gallina grinned at the smaller woman, her lips clipped by the healed scars on her face. “Don’t worry, I know these birds like the back of my hand. I’ll set you up with the perfect one for you.”

“Have you worked here for a long time?”

“Here: No,” Gallina said, holding a door open for Artemisia. “My family owned our own chocobo ranch in Galahd before we had to move to Insomnia.” Artemisia perked up at the name of her home. “Lived there for a while but then… Well, you know, recent events.” Artemisia’s mood dropped and based off of Gallina’s tone she wasn’t the only one who was feeling for their home, even if it was only temporary for one of them. “We moved out here and been working for Wiz since.” She smiled at Artemisia again. “I will say, Insomnia was never really home for me, but it is nice to see that refugees like you guys seem to be doing okay.”

Artemisia felt a different kind of chill go up her spine. “Was it that obvious?”

“Heh, I know those city clothes anywhere. Insomnian clothes stick out like a sore thumb compared to what most people out here wear.”

“Ah…”

As long as she doesn’t know about Noctis being the new king we’re fine. As nice as these people are, the group couldn’t risk Noctis’ security.

Gallina had her hand on a door knob before she looked at Artemisia again, tilting her head curiously. “But I don’t think I’ve seen those type of clothes very much, even in Insomnia. Were you guys Crownsguard or something?”

Crap!

“Oh no, it’s just a fashion statement.” Artemisia lied, keeping her voice even. “Going for that quirky, punk-rock look. The guys are really into that sort of thing and I just do it so that they don’t look too ridiculous, y’know?”

Gallina stared at Artemisia with a raised brow before shrugging and opening the door to a communal bathroom with a couple of stalled showers. “There’s soap and standard hair products in all of the showers and there’s a bench to lay out your clothes on. Once you’re done showering, you can hand me your dirty ones and I’ll throw them in the wash.” Artemisia thanked her and scurried in, eager to wash herself off of all the grime plastered to her.

After a enjoying her shower -- it was nice not having to worry about one of the guys accidentally walking in on her again -- she changed into the spare clothes that Gallina had left for her. While the outfit was a bit much, what with the shirt being brightly yellow and the small chocobo mascot advertising the ranch, it was better than her having to wear what spare clothes she had. Those clothes were beyond appropriate for a ranch setting and would surely be ruined with all the dirt and chocobo feathers. At least this uniform was comfortable, definitely the kind of material working people would prefer.

Leaving the bathroom, Artemisia went back to the pasture and found Gallina over by the fence, watching Prompto and Ignis interact with the birds. The woman greeted Artemisia when she saw her and took her mud covered clothes. “I’ll be right back and then I’ll set you up with your chocobo.”

Artemisia was about to thank her as the other woman walked away when an awkward cough behind her caught her attention. She looked back and had to stop herself from laughing. Noctis stood there, cheeks red, next to Gladiolus in a ridiculous outfit that differed from her own. This one seemed to have been some kind of festival uniform, the words Moogle Chocobo Carnival written on the torso and the back. It had a picture of a chocobo being ridden by some kind of alien, fairy, devil creature, if such a thing existed. She supposed that it was a moogle, as stated by the shirt. The colors on his shirt, with closer inspection, were just extreme close ups of the two festival subjects’ faces, coloring the shirt yellow, white, pink and orange. The best part of it was the hat that Gladiolus kept insisting Noctis to wear despite his protests. It had a chocobo’s face on the front with little wings sticking out on the sides, and a moogle’s face on the back with an antenna standing up on top. It was all absurdly wonderful.

“Don’t. Say. A thing.” Noctis emphasized, swiping the comedic hat off after Gladiolus put it on him again.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Artemisia giggled, a big amused grin on her face. “You look… stunning.” Noctis groaned, pushing Gladiolus off of him as the bigger man continued to annoy him. “Come on,” the embarrassed man insistently pushed the two into the pen towards the chocobos, ignoring the looks Ignis and Prompto gave him once the three joined them. A rancher had set up a saddle on to Prompto’s chocobo and now the blonde was getting ready for a ride. But it seemed like the chocobo wanted to play a game of tag instead as it lightly pecked Prompto on the head before running off, running circles around the man playfully. The rancher was obviously frustrated that the bird wasn’t behaving and tried to make it stand still while Prompto took some slightly dazed but loving photos of the silly bird.

“Alright the clothes are washi-- What’s going on?” Gallina returned and saw the little spectacle before her. The excited chocobo had gotten a couple of the other birds to join in on its game of chase and the other rancher begged for her to help get them all settled. Gallina sighed, muttering “This is what happens when they’re stuck in their pens for too long…” before joining the fray. She grabbed the reins from the main chocobo as it ran by her, stopping it in its tracks with a yank. The other worker wouldn’t have been able to stop the giant bird with just the reins, but Gallina’s build wasn’t for nothing.

“You,” she tapped the bird’s beak and pointed at it like a mom disciplining her child, “need to stop that, mister. You’ll get to run around in a minute.” The bird leaned forward and starting nuzzling into her neck, shaking its head side to side that made her own move in response. Gallina patted it on its neck before pushing it back once she felt the bird’s beak pecking through her hair. She gave the reins over to the other worker and calmed down the other two excitable birds in a similar fashion. Once all of them had settled down she guided them over to the group of five.

The birds walked over to the guys, introducing themselves to their new riders with little actions of affection. Gladiolus’ chocobo flapped its wings happily after Gladiolus patted it on the head before trying to return the favor and laying its own head on top of his, making a noise almost similar to a purr. Ignis’ bird was the most calm in its greeting, sniffing Ignis curiously before chirping in hello, to which Ignis rewarded it with some satisfying chin scratches. Prompto’s bird finally decided to behave and stand still so Prompto could love on it. Prompto was enthusiastically fluffing the bird’s feathers, rubbing his hands all over it and giving it little scratches. The bird responded with another peck to his head, which must be that bird’s odd way of showing affection. Noctis’ bird acted aloof when Noctis tried to coo the bird closer, only to to start begging for attention when Noctis looked away in defeat. Artemisia giggled at how perfect the combinations for everyone were.

“Artemisia,” Gallina nudged her, guiding Artemisia to the last chocobo as the guys started to situate themselves on their chocobos’ saddles. The last chocobo was sitting in the grass still, perking up when it saw them approach. “This is Dottie,” Gallina patted the sitting chocobo on the head. “She’s your chocobo. She’s super patient and she’s the one that most first riders go with. She’ll be perfect for you.” Dottie shook, ruffling her feathers before standing up and looking at Artemisia expectactly. Artemisia hesitated, standing a distance away from the bird. She knew that chocobos were usually super friendly and tame, but she couldn’t help but be nervous. “Come on,” Gallina urged, waving for her to move closer. “She’s not gonna do anything.”

Artemisia approached slowly, holding her hand out for the bird to smell as she came within reach. The large bird sniffed her hand inquisitively, sneezing lightly -- Or at least as lightly as a giant chocobo can -- making Artemisia flinch her hand back slightly. Dottie let out a little “Kweh!” before bumping its head against Artemisia’s hand, requesting to be petted. Artemisia let out a small sigh of relief, happy to see their first introduction went well and indulged herself in the sensation of the charming chocobo. Dottie’s bright feathers were incredibly soft and acted a lot like fur with the way it responded to be to touch; when she ruffled them it only made it more convincing.

“She’ll keep ya safe when you guys are out and about.” Gallina stated, watching the two bond. She laughed when Dottie forced herself forward to wrap her long neck around Artemisia’s shoulder in a hug. “Aw, see! She likes you.”

Artemisia chuckled at the cute display of affection, smoothing Dottie’s neck feathers in return. She heard a small click and looked over her shoulder to see Prompto with his camera in hand and a giant grin on his face. “Gotta capture the moment!” He proclaimed happily. “Oh. Em. Gee. Cutest bird ever!” Prompto proclaimed, referring to the photo he had just taken of the two. His bird immediately bucked him a little with a sharp squawk, almost like it was insulted that he wasn’t admiring its looks instead.

“We got a course ready for you kids if ya wanna race before nightfall.” Wiz informed, leaning against the otherside of the fence.

Prompto was urging Artemisia to hurry up and board her chocobo, eager to get some racing in. “How about a little competition?” Noctis offered with a confident grin. “The person with the best time gets to sleep on the bed in the caravan.” The caravans only had one queen sized bed, and while they weren’t the highest quality, they were still preferred to the rickety pull out futon.

“You can’t occupy an entire bed to yourself, Noct. You must share the other side.” Ignis interjected sternly.

Noctis sighed, a defeated frown on his face. “Fine…”

“But what’s a competition without a little wager.”

“Heh, I’m down for that.” Considering Gladiolus’ size it’s no guessing why he would prefer sleeping on the big bed instead of the futon.

“Oh yeah!” Prompto laughed over at Artemisia who was having a hard time getting on her bird’s saddle. “Come on Artemis! Don’t want to be left in the dust.”

Gallina helped lift Artemisia the rest of the way over her chocobo, giving Dottie a few secure pats as the rider fixed herself. “Just a heads up,” Gallina whispered in Artemisia’s ear, “Dottie hates losing.” She winked.

In the end, it was Prompto who was sleeping in the bed with a happily full stomach thanks to Wiz’s cooking. And despite the others’ losses, everyone was able to enjoy their time and had some much need laughter amongst themselves and the new friends they found on the ranch.

Though Noctis was a bit insulted that Prompto wanted to share the bed with Artemisia instead of him.

[majorxbennyxboy]

Mom Watches TURN: S2E1-4

(Apologies for the stream-of-thought some bits devolved into, these are all typed real-time and I was getting :| between comments so. )

Episode One:

(as I skip Caleb's comment bouta hatchet-throwin at te barrel as he's perched atop) "did he just say something foul" "ah kinda it'isn't something I'd care to hear that is I'mmmm"

(Caleb's talking to Ben) "WHO BEAT CALEB WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIS FACE" "nothing's wrong with his-" "NO. LOOK AT HIM. THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WHO HIT HIM IN THE LAST EPISODE" "it's been two months since the last-" "SOMEONE HIT HIM" "okay yeah maybe it happened while he was getting the whale oil? But it isn't a plot point or anyth-" "THIS DISTURBS ME"

(While Abe's making his little butterknife sleevie-sheaths and adding stuff to his getup) "what's he doing" "trickin' out his spy stuff"

(Mary be knowing) "Mmmm"

(NOT A SINGLE COMMENT ABOUT MURDER KITTEN GETTING ALMOST WHUPPED BY BRADFORD BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD GIVING CALEB BREWSTER THE (IN)OPPORTUNE TIME TO INTERVENE WTH I WANT MY MONEY BACK)

(laughs at Mary) "she thinks she's gonna control him because he won't love her? I know what she's doing but she's also trying to get him not to shtipple that girl"

(snickering at Bradmadge Side-Eye Spectacular)

(After Arnold's Dramatic Reading of the Grub-Shite Pamphlet) "Didn't Washington write that" "what no he wrote that, Charles Lee wrote th- the guy who was reading it wrote it. anonymously. It's what Ben was having a hissy fit about earlier"

(On Abe BS'ing to Hewlett) "what's he doing? trying to throw him off?"

Episode Two:

*as I fast forwarding past Eastin's Comment* "They talk ugly here too?" "..yeahehehehaehaahrafjalshasfa"

(oh goddddd i completely forgot about that guy's comments after the poetry I'm Dying)

(townsend walks in on Abe) "that guy did that on purpose"

(As Hewlett bumbles adorably about play-tonic, as Anna had it) "why's he babbling all that foolishness at her" "bc he's an awkward turtle"

(guy hands Andre his stuff) "Oh. poor loki"

(im writhing in discomfort as Simcoe and the guy get ready  to fight) Mom: *doesn't even React* Me: Mom what the hell are you are you SO desensitized *quivers*

*credits roll* Mom, suddenly: he has a big head. He's hideous. Even if he wasn't who he is. God bless him he's

Episode Three:

(if she don't freak sufficiently about dad yelling at the boy im)

(My note since mom's not talkin' much this time around: *deep breath* CALEB AND BEN BOUNCING AROUND SACKETT'S WORKSHOP TOUCHING STUFF IS THE MOST ADORABLE SH I'VE SEEN WITH MY EYES THIS IS TOO CUTE )

Mom: *Sees Andre out of uniform* "oh my goodness" Me: *real casual* yyyyyyeeeeeeahhh?? Mom: ...he looks...different. Me: *real casual* ehehhraeyrajyeaaaah yeah yeah he does doesn't he ahem

Mom: are those dudes standing around in tutus Me: they sure are Mom: okay

(On Arnold) "He looks like that woman who made you miserable for a solid year" Me, Mentally: *SCREAMING BC I NEVER REALIZED BUT MAYBE THAT'S WHY I CAN'T COUNTENANCE TO LOOK AT HIM*

*soft gasp when Arnold says "You weren't dismissed"*

Me: jus so u know there's about to be a thing like the Titanic sketchbook Mom: in the Major's room? Me: yeh Mom: he's got naked pictures? Me: yeh one Mom: Why? Is he a Freak? Me: I I I I I I I I don't. think so? I think it's just like- Both: oh my god

(as I fast forward past the idiots in the window) "This show is full of...foolishness?" *whimpers*

(She just not even giving me anything to work with GWash is shouting at my boy and she's just eating a sandwich like ma are you so unmoved for real ya heart should be shriveling whats wrong with you

im over here in pain and she's just. mellow as a mushroom

I'M GUTTED AND SHE'S JUST EATING A SANDWICH WHAT THE HELL THIS ISN'T WHAT I WANTED THIS 'Not my Son" CONVERSATION WAS THE ENTIRE REASON I WANTED HER TO WATCH TURN AND SHE'S NOT EVEN REACTING SHE'S JUST FREAKIN CHILL IS THIS A PUNISHMENT FOR SOMETHING

Episode Four:

MA YOU BEST GIVE ME SOMETHING FOR MY SCRUFFY BOY I BELIEVE IN YOU

*disbelieving* "invisible ink" *snrt* "IT WAS AN ACTUAL THING, MOM."

(im internally squealing because Benanna is so cute they're so cute) (Mom don't even react to one of the cutest moments in all of TURN /dammit mother/)

(okay but how is she not even remotely affected by the Scruffy Boi this is one of Ben's finest hours and she's just. unphased. mom. mom why are you doing this to me)

"Did they tell the little boy he's supposed to have carved the ship" "I...don't know actually" "so nothing bad happens with this" "...........................................................im not gonna tell u that" ". . ." "That wasn't really fool-proof, that piece being able to come out like that"

(smh as I prepare to skip a Brewster Moment - *HEART FLIPS* i can feel me mum's disapproval and mie ancestors' as well dear heavens AMC WHY)

"I'd hate for something to happen to Abigail or Cicero"

(HERE WE GO WITH THE AWFUL TENT SCENE LET'S HAVE IT MA)

"IS HE BEING SET UP BY THIS MAN" thank you ma

"I don't want nothing to happen to Caleb either. He's someone." I cannae convey the joy which takes root in my dumb poor heart every time mom expresses a fondness for my boy C-Brew

(Abe chasing his dad’s SpyGuy) “Dude’s Leading Him isn’t he.” *dude gets Stabbed* “Is that the tavern guy” “it’s not the tavern guy ma”

(On Arnold/Ben) "I...don't feel like this is :/ going well"

Ben: Intelligence, sir. Mom: UH UHHHH (Post-Viewing)

"Simcoe must be punished and fed to what's his name. Rogers" "W H A T" "yeh they should kill each other"

"I don't want anything to happen to Abigail or her son. Nobody better cause anything to happen to them. I don't care about anyone else."

"Rogers and Simcoe are the devil. Akinbode should get to beat the hell outta both of em" "But he was rude to Abigail in the first season" "He sure was but he should get to beat the hell outta both of em"

"I don't want anything to happen to Caleb either but I fear for his life. I'm afraid he's gonna be hurt bad." Me: *sucks in breath* "By Simcoe" Me: *LOOKS INTO CAMERA"*

"And then Loki he's just *noises* "What does that mean" *noises* "Good way or bad way" *noises*

"And Washington and Ben are getting on my nerves" "w h a t"

"And I'm concerned that whatsisname benedict cumberbatch is working Ben over"

"That boy just keeps making mistakes" "!!!!!!"

(On Anna) "And the fortune teller. she’s"

"I don't know bout this show but I do know Abigail and her boy they need some Goodness"

[f-imaginings]

Didn’t think I’d have to do this but I’ve got people coming to me left and right over this nonsense, conveying threats to have my work reported and pulled down blah blah blah, so let me summarize my case publicly and let you all make up your own minds. 

I’ll start by saying truthfully that I’ve never read TNP. I don’t generally read fics with non-con in them bc of bad past experiences, but from reading the prologue when researching what i supposedly plagiarized the writing seemed really good and enjoyable, with interesting themes and references. I’m sure its a lovely fic and people who enjoy it should as it stands on its own merits. 

I also haven’t plagarised anything. There is a lot of he said she said happening over that so I’ll just present the facts I have and let people make up their own minds. So far there’s just been one side of the story very loudly being told. I’ll say my piece here and people can make up their own minds. 

So I’ve never read their story. I’ve been getting some nasty harrassment though claiming I plagarised it to write my own story, which is Knowing Me, Knowing You on ao3. It’s a Billford fic, and it’s inspired by abba lyrics, Gravity Falls the series, and Journal Number 3. 

Two days ago I got this anonymous comment on my fanfic. 

This anonymous poster spammed the comments in the fic in many chapters, and also felt the need to tell everyone who regularly comments on my fic by replying to their comment how shitty my writing is and that it’s plagarising this other fic I’ve never read. 

The link to the full comments thread is here if people want to read and do their own sleuthing. 

The comments rather spitefully tell me how my writing is terrible, how I’m scum, how unoriginal I am ect. I’ll let you all read it and make up your own minds about whether this is fair to say or not. 

I then decided to go speak to the author of this fic i had supposedly plagarised, because I thought it was a misunderstanding, or that a follower of theirs who was very zealous had took it upon themselves to go rogue and harass other writers who (these are the similarities as far as they’ve been explained to me) write Billford, and have written about a human Bill helping Stanford with the portal. 

Here is my conversation with the author of TNP, screenshotted, so you can read that and make up your own mind about it too. 

It was quite startling for me to have been spoken to like this when I went amicably to a fellow writer hoping to solve a situation that was groundless and unnecessary. I was called a liar, and passive aggressive for having approached the author directly with the situation seeking a resolution. 

In an ideal world I would like an apology for this behavior, but I won’t hold my breath, I’m just here to state my case and clear my name. 

This is my fanfiction. It’s 163243 words long as of it’s last update. I started writing it on the last day of January 2017, and since then it has inspired me boundlessly. I get a lot of joy out of writing it, which is clear to see when you look at how quickly I’ve been churning out these words in this small space of time. Three months have gone by and I’m on 18 chapters and it’s been wonderful to write, I’ve had some lovely reviews from folks, and these have been the first negative reviews I have seen for it. 

I asked people who have read both of the works, my own and TNP, what the similarities were that led the author to believe I had plagarised. 

What I heard as feedback was:

Similarities

Both Billford pairing fanfics

Both involving human Bill

To do with building the portal

Differences: 

Storyline

Plot

Character design. My human Bill is black. He’s black, with gold eyes, yellow hair, and gold binding tattoos sewn into his skin. I’ve been told their Bill is italian??? Not sure where the similarities are there. 

Dynamic between Bill and Ford (TNP apparently has Bill and Ford sharing the nicknames darling and kitten. Rest assured, through the entirety of my 160,000 word fanfic not once do my Bill or Ford ever call each other anything even remotely resembling ‘darling’ or ‘kitten’ they are more likely to call each other a pain in the ass in my fic) 

World building

Characters (mine contains plenty of Fiddleford, Wendy’s mum, who I have called Willow Oakwood bc a lumberjack falls in love with her, Lazy Susan, Keyhole and Amorphous Shape, the paradox buddies, Pyronica and Kryptos on the front lines, Argos Panoptes, Raha Diniero ect) 

Sexual content (TNP contains rape and sexual harassment, my work is a slow burn of epic proportions, they only kissed for the first time in my last chapter, and Bill is averse to being touched by Stanford at first. My work also is entirely consensual as I can’t write non-con due to personal experiences)

Key events (my story involves events such as hunting down the gobblewonker with a harpoon, nearly being devoured by the island head monster, going on a double date with lazy suzan and wendy’s mum and raising the undead, giving birth to the summerween trickster, stealing treasure from Quentin Trembley’s grave, a heist at the Cryptix Noire Warping Black Market’s, and Fiddleford’s wife Patricia telling baby Tate to stop crying) 

Writing style (My writing is more light hearted, I make lots of jokes because I want to enjoy my own story. I’m told TNP is more serious)

Direction (I do not know where TNP is going, having never read it, but I know my story is going to follow along with canon up to the betrayal, after it, following Ford through the portal, and back out for Weirdmageddon) 

Having completed four years of university studying English literature, I’m very aware of how serious plagiarism is, and how seriously allegations of plagiarism need to be taken. If someone’s poured their effort into creating a work, they deserve to be credited for that work, and if a work was created in reference to something else it’s respectful to cite your references. So here are the works I have referenced in order to create this fic. 

- Hirsch, A, 2016, Journal 3; Gravity Falls, Disney Press, LA. - Gravity Falls, complete series, 2016, DVD, Disney XD, created by Hirsch, A, et al. - Abba’s complete back catalogue. 

I’ve also referenced several Wikipedia pages; the page on black markets, on hyperpyrexia, on Leonardo Da Vinci, on stethoscopes, on Argos Panoptes in Greek Mythology, and the page listing the different planets and races in the entire Star Trek series. I’ve relied on the Gravity Falls wikia to help me maintain accuracy with character names, places, details about the Shack and so on. 

I haven’t referenced, nor have I read The Ninth Paradigm. I would have tentatively liked to from reading the synopsis, but I have decided I won’t be reading it any time soon following the conversation I had with the author of the fanfic, which has soured me somewhat from consuming their content.

I work full time, 38 hour work weeks, and run a second job on the side. Something I don’t have time for is drama. I’m quite frankly surprised I even have the time to dedicate to writing this fanfic of mine, but I do, because I love Gravity Falls, I am excited about the story I’m writing, I get to laugh at my own jokes when I’m writing, I get to entertain myself, and in posting this here, hopefully entertain others.

I’m not writing this to impress anyone with my prose or build this fic into anything more than it is, it’s just a bit of fun set to Abba lyrics, inspired by Dipper in the shower singing Disco Girl aka Dancing Queen.

If I were a younger writer, or if I were less confident in myself, this kind of harassment, both in the comments here on ao3, and the conversation I had with the author of TNP when I looked to resolve the situation, would have been incredibly damaging. If I were a younger writer, being harassed, I would find the fandom uninviting, toxic, incredibly discouraging and unhealthy.

Billford as a pairing has a small enough fandom as is, looking through the tag on tumblr, there are anti-shippers adding to that environment of harassment. Adding to that environment of harassment within the fandom can only be damaging. I believe fandoms should encourage writers and content producers, that fandom should be a community where you support one another, and the base content you all enjoyed that brought you all together.

Gravity Falls fans are smart. They followed a quirky, clever, coded show from start to finish and loved every bit of it. I’m presenting the above information here so that you can all make your own minds up about this issue. I think that’s fair.

That’s all I have to say about this issue.