#actually the thing that drives me most nuts with a lot of people on the right is the way they'll hate the state with their chest

[outeremissary]

We need to go further than banning people from using TTRPG tags for CRPGs we need to ban people from using any and all D&D tags for things that aren't D&D

[medicinemane]

Hmm... I'm mad right now, and thanks to tumblr's search being ass I can't even fully say why

I just remember that bolton said some shit a few years back that really pissed me off... something along the lines of just brazening talking about organizing coups or something... like it was that level

Now, I reblogged the clip from the interview to be mad about it at the time, but searching for bolton on my blog... no hits

Couldn't even remember his name for a hot minute there, just thought "that asshole with the big mustache", but man... I wish I could literally just find and reblog the clip... I could probably track it down with a search engine, but then it wouldn't be easy to just reblog it, so I'd probably just end up summarizing it... and I'm too tired for that

Anyway, fuck john bolton and fuck the US government. I get fucking sick of the total lack of accountability those assholes have. Honestly a fair few of them should probably be on trial for war crimes, and we shouldn't protect them

Just hit with a sudden wave of being pissed off about this stuff, so there it is

[drdemonprince]

am i being stupid by refusing to invest any of my money? i just don’t find it ethical (lots of people have 0 idea what theyre actually invested in with typical low risk investments and it would actually drive me nuts to have to investigate every single thing thats on there) and i also have zero faith in the stability of the economy or the world i just literally don’t trust like that. and fear that with climate change i’m not going to have a traditional future or retirement anyway. is this incredibly stupid i’m being so genuine because i dont know

I think your ethical concerns are totally reasonable. Any investment in the stock market is pretty inherently fraught, even if you choose index funds that exclude the especially bad stocks of like firearms/military contractors/etc. Even something like a bond can be easily said to be bad, because it's a loan to the government, and most money market or high yield savings are not untainted either, because most banks themselves invest in fucked up shit like oil pipelines. The one avenue I think that would be mostly okay is a high yield savings account for a credit union, or a bank that you've researched and know doesn't invest in that kind of shady shit. I have also argued previously that it's not wrong to invest in an apartment or house -- as long as you're not landlording, vulnerable people having more secure housing and the ability to share that housing with others in their community is good and understandable. So on balance, I get where you are coming from, though I think having a financial safety net makes people less likely to have to take on unethical jobs and makes them less vulnerable to financial abuse and exploitation, which has merit ethically.

I tend to see the doomerism question a bit differently. If the US empire falls or the economy collapses, you'll either have much bigger problems than your 401k bottoming out (problems like the complete obliteration of the supply chain), OR we will be living in a financial paradigm so dramatically different and more just that you wont MIND that you dont have that money anymore. Whereas if the US economy continues to exist, you're gonna be fucked if you dont have a retirement to fall back on, so why make yourself needlessly more vulnerable by not saving? The ethical rub with this, though, is that it creates the moral hazard of rooting for the US empire and economy to never fall, and that rendering you more conservative... which is a possibility, but like, as i said, i think it's possible to have some money saved for a rainy day under capitalism while still praying for capitalism's downfall. if anything, being more financially independent makes it EASIER for me to risk unemployment & etc by doing more radical political actions and speaking my mind and saying no to things. but ymmv

[celestie0]

Some headcanons about Kickoff college!Gojo, please!

hellooo my love i’m so sorry this took me a while i wanted to post ch9 first!

kickoff!gojo headcanons pt.1 unserious & fluffy edition lol

ᰔ these headcanons are based off of my fanfic “kickoff” which is about popular frat boy soccer college athlete gojo lol & there are spoilers below ᰔ for my kickoff readers: most of these are so unserious and/or fluffy (not rly much nsfw) hope u enjoy!!

kickoff!gojo who almost got arrested once for running away from the cops. he wasn’t even in trouble for anything they just started chasing him bc he started running 😭

kickoff!gojo whose primary love language is physical touch and so all of the times he’s had to NOT touch you has driven him absolutely fuckin nuts. positively BONKERS he’s practically been lobotomized by the restraint he’s had to exercise to not touch you

kickoff!gojo whose frat once hosted a date auction to raise money for rush and gojo singlehandedly raised $20k in one night from the bidding bachelorettes (and bachelors)🧍🏻‍♀️he has yet to go on all of those dates he owes them 😅 he runs away anytime his frat president tries to bring it up LOL

kickoff!gojo who is actually a pretty decent student, i mean he’s a business major so womp womp ofc he’s getting by just fine. i think his favorite class he’s ever taken was freshman year econ bc him and todo got into sm shit in that class and it's some of his fondest memories

kickoff!gojo who was literally picturing a life with you on the italian countryside when you were telling him about it. self inserted to the MAX

kickoff!gojo who is always the first to like all of your film photography slideshows on instagram because he has your post notifs on :”) you and messi are the only ppl he’s got post notifs on for 🤣

kickoff!gojo who thought he would be okay with watching your life from afar, through small pictures on his phone, but the thought devastated him more n more w every waking minute

kickoff!gojo who realized that having you wrapped in his arms at the end of ch9 was the closest thing he’s felt to peace since before the night his father passed away

kickoff!gojo who hasn’t really kept too much memoribilia of his father since a lot of the memories are painful for him, but he’s kept that old soccer ball w his dad’s signature n word of love for his mom on it

kickoff!gojo who wouldnt have been able to get through the trauma of losing his father if suguru wasn’t there by his side. he would’ve really lost himself, and would’ve given up on soccer if not for suguru's support. he's truly really grateful for him

kickoff!gojo who knows what his sun, moon & rising signs are because he’s been ran through 🙄 smh. WHORE

kickoff!gojo who plays for charity soccer tournaments on the weekends whenever he can 🫶🏼💕 he loves it bc there’s less pressure to play super well & also he loves getting to meet the people that the events are helping out

kickoff!gojo who has a massive sex drive (he got that athlete testosterone 😔🤚🏼) esp around someone he genuinely likes AHEM YOU so beware that if you start dating him he’s gonna beg you to put it on him at least 15 times a day and you’ll have to reject him 13.5 times

kickoff!gojo who is not ready to be a father at ALL at this point in his life but he’s thought ab how nice it would be to teach his kids how to play soccer someday :”) he’s givin me girl dad vibes tho, and you just KNOW he’s gonna be cheering on his lil girls when they’re tearing through the little league w their sparkly princess tiaras & tutus on 😤 he’d be the little league coach for sure LMAO

also little league coach!gojo would 100% promise to let the kiddos shave his head if they win the championship game 😭 i can just imagine you yelling at him when he randomly comes home bald one day

kickoff!nanami&choso&suguru who would be such protective soccer uncles to yours and gojo's duaghters. not a single boy would ever get NEAR those girls i'm telling youuu. pls pray for them haha

kickoff!gojo who figured out you were mina’s roommate through a little bit of facebook stalking. and yes, he scrolled all the way down to your embarrassing middle school photos. and yes, he still likes you despite seeing them. more, even, when he thinks about it. also, he’s pissed you had a digimon themed 9th birthday party and you didn’t invite him 😒 what’s up w that

kickoff!gojo & kickoff!choso who once illegally played an off-season tourney abroad in spain for a lump sum lmfaoo and it was a pretty decent cut of cash. but shhhh dont tell the NCAA ab that pls or else they’re fucked 💀

this is all i could think of rn haha thank you anon for the ask and hope you enjoyed them <333

[olderthannetfic]

I have really mixed feelings about the small proportion of F/F fiction (original or fanfic), because yeah sure, people have their desires, they should write what they want, I get it. It all works out when I hear it from person to person. But somehow the logic only ever applies in one direction? "There are more male protagonists because men only care about male characters! Women also mostly care about male characters, because that's the majority of characters they get!" And then somehow we also yet kvetch when men write female characters (because it's incorrectly or something, nevermind if women are writing male characters correctly). Why don't we expect gay men to feel compelled only by femslash for the same reasons (but gender swapped) as the lesbian slashers/fujoshi? All of those very rational justifications are applied selectively, "for me for not for thee," and it all only leads to "idk I just don't wanna write femslash", for Reasons. Do we get to call them microaggressions yet?

--

No, you don't get to call other people's fantasy life a microaggression.

That is indeed "for me but not for thee" in the sense that you get to want what you want but other people aren't supposed to follow their id.

Do you also police gay men who spend too much time on drag and obsessing over female divas? That's an actual real world behavior that's somewhat equivalent. It frequently goes unchallenged, at least by progressives, because men are allowed to do whatever they want with chick stuff, while women are "stealing" if they dare to stray into dude stuff.

(God, I've seen so much more policing of drag kings being ~problematic~ for acting out stereotypical gender than policing of drag queens for the same. It's nuts!)

Fujoshi are often queer, but it's absurd to think we're mostly lesbians. We tend to be bi or asexual women with gender stuff going on, though there is a mix of everybody, including lesbians. There are also a lot of AFAB non-women who get lumped in with us. On the rare occasions I find a man willing to admit to being a similar demographic, he usually does like gender play in his hobbies and entertainment. It's just that men face even more pressure than women do to fit into tidy categories. Bi women get told we're whores. Bi men are told they don't exist.

Yes, I know plenty of lesbians who write more m/m than f/f, but in the big picture of all of AO3 or all of fanfic or all of media, they aren't the demographic driving these numbers. They're vastly outnumbered by the bi women, the asexual women, and the straight and gnc women.

The men we should be looking at as an equivalent aren't cis gay men but bicurious soy boys and the like.

Do most of us fujoshi object to equivalent men doing an equivalent thing? I've seen it sometimes, and I agree it's hypocritical. I'd like us to afford men the same ability to play and take on identities in their art. I remember enjoying Ranma fandom back in the day and reading quite a lot of f/f that was probably by men. It had some of that same sense of distance and fantasy that I so enjoy in m/m aimed at fujoshi. (I do consume some by-cis-gay, for-cis-gay content, both m/m and f/f, but it's often too literal and too bound up in specific named identities for my taste.)

On average, the people I see complaining most about men producing f/f material are the same people who think that because I have a clit, I should center my life around women exclusively. In other words, people spouting radfem ideology, perhaps on purpose or perhaps without realizing.

I do agree that some of the ways of expressing a lack of desire to write femslash can get pretty douchey. I want us to move away from some of the less accurate ones like "There are no compelling female characters" because of this.

But the reason for all these jerkass explanations is that women and people perceived as women who like m/m are constantly asked to explain ourselves. These aren't usually microaggressions: they're openly hostile. People get defensive and try to answer with important-sounding reasons about identity and pain because society at large won't accept "I like this" as the true explanation.

Pleasure is never enough of a reason for a woman to do something.

[celiastjamesoscar]

More Sam Carpenter smut headcanons pls ;(!

Sam Carpenter Smut HC

I’m so sorry this has taken me a hot minute to get to, it just took me forever to think of something! That being said:

NSFW under cut

Sam didn’t jump straight into sex with you. After about two months of dating, you two had sex for the time together.

The first time was soft and sensual; Sam didn’t rush into anything with you and she made sure you were comfortable the entire time.

She topped the entire night as a way to show you how much she respected you, and of course, she wanted to show you a good time.

It took several months of having sex before Sam finally allowed you to top.

The first time she allowed you top, she was nervous. Sam hated being this vulnerable around people and she wasn’t sure if she could fully enjoy herself because of that fear, but when you softly kissed her lips and pushed her down on the mattress, all her worries and fear left with a single breath.

Once Sam was comfortable with you, you were surprised by how submissive she actually was. Soft pleas and whimpers left her lips at the faintest touch, and you had never known her to be such a needy person before.

After that night, Sam realized that she did enjoy being on bottom, as it was your own way of showing her how much you really loved her. She considered herself a switch, but between you and her, she was a bottom.

I mean, just look at those big brown eyes, definitely giving sub vibes

Sam prefers soft and slow sex most days, but when she’s had a long, stressful day, she’s down for some rough sex.

She’s into choking, knifeplay, and bondage. But she draws the line at having her eyes covered; Sam has to be able to see what is going on at all times.

Only time when she doesn’t need to see what’s going on, is when you are hitting it from the back with the strap.

Missionary is her favorite when she giving, just because she loves being about to see your face when you cum, and because she can also kiss your lips.

When Sam is receiving, she loves doggy. There’s something about the way you force her head down into the pillows that turns her on, and she can’t explain it. The grip you have on her hips drives her nuts.

Sam absolutely goes feral if she’s had a hard day and you bring out the strap. She loves it when fuck her hard and rough; it makes her forget about her hard day.

She also loves using it on you if she’s had a rough day; taking all of her pent up frustrations out on you, but in the best way.

Aftercare was a foreign concept to her at first, and she didn’t even know that it was a thing. But she quickly fell in love with it when you would rub her back, bring her some water and snacks, etc.

Her favorite form of aftercare would be taking a bath/shower together. Just the closeness of it seems a lot more personal to her than just sex.

I hope you enjoyed this!! Let me know if you have any other headcanons you would like to hear!! <3

[lacrimosathedark]

THAT'S IT! This is a Janet Drake Defense Post

As may be obvious, I spend a lot of time reading fanfic. And there's this trend that drives me nuts, and it's villainizing Janet Drake.

I'm not gonna say she's an A+ mother. She's not. She chose her career and adventures over spending time with her child much of the time. But fandom portrays her as some rich pompous ice queen, which is never shown.

Janet Drake mostly appears in the story Tim's introduced, and in the story she dies.

So, let's start from the top: Haly's Circus.

This event is the only time we see her really interacting with Tim before her death, but it shows that at least when he was young, she was an active part of his life. She was worried about bringing Tim because it might scare him. And then rightfully scolds her husband for being sexist because Jack Drake actually IS a jerk.

...I don't like the art in this comic. Or that the writer doesn't know how kids speak.

But Janet is being supportive of Tim's clear interest in Dick's performance.

And then tragedy strikes and she acts like, y'know, a mother.

Her priority is getting her son and herself out of there.

Also worth noting that the Drakes sent a copy of that final photo of the Graysons TO Dick, which is how he has it at all. If both of them were stuck up pricks, would they even bother sending a photo to a grieving child performer they hardly know? I can't imagine Jack really bothering, but I don't see why Janet wouldn't.

And then, by the time she's dying, we know that Tim's parents have been away for a very long time, he never knows where they are, but they've communicated enough that he knows that they've been fighting.

They're passive aggressive to say the least. This marriage is clearly not working anymore.

EDIT CUZ I REMEMBERED A THING:

It's worth noting that this is a time before smartphones. This comic was released in 1990, which was when pre-paid mobile phones had just started existing. Coverage isn't universal NOW, so back then it was even less, and Jack and Janet are archeologists (or archeologist adjacent?) so they're going to be in less developed and populated areas most of the time. It's unlikely they'd have consistent access to a functional phone that could call the states to talk to Tim regularly.

This isn't to defend their absence, because fuck that, but it's to give it some context. I don't think they were trying to ignore or abandon Tim. Communication was just not readily available and Janet seems to get wrapped up in work...and Jack's an asshole.

Also for note, Janet is probably the one sending Tim postcards in the first place. It being signed "Mom and Dad" is what makes me think that. Jack would have put himself first if he wrote it, it woulda said "Dad and Mom". That's admittedly pure speculation, BUT IT FITS SOOOOOO

My thought is if this were made modern, Janet would be sending extremely scattered texts and Tim would get next to nothing from Jack unless Janet prompted him.

END EDIT

(Fair warning, this story is a few levels of Yikes, but I'm gonna stay on topic)

Bad guy Obeah Man does...something? to the pilot, and they crash, and he has a group of people kidnap the Drakes and their assistant Jeremy.

Danger really puts some things in perspective, for Janet, at least. And that continues for her. Jack is a bit delusional and in denial, thinking he has any control of the situation.

They are tied up and filmed for ransom, their assistant killed right in front of them.

Jack just keeps raging, but Janet is having regrets. Notice how she doesn't cry until Tim is brought up. Could be nothing, could be something.

And then she dies.

Her only other major appearance is when Tim is having a fever dream from the Clench and everything is kind of okay for a minute.

Tim very clearly loves his mom. And we may not get a lot of characterization for her, but she's not cold or callous like people write her constantly.

And now, we finally have a little more about her as of Batman 134.

I haven't really been keeping up since the Gotham War stuff because What The Fuck Was That My Guy, but I recently saw this specific comic.

The multiverse is fucked up again, some way some how, and Bruce is lost (again) and Tim has to get him back (again). This time, Tim is going in after him. But he doesn't end up going straight to Bruce.

He goes to see an alt of his mom.

Tim missed her so much that he ended up going to her before Bruce.

And her immediate reaction is to run up and hug him. Does that look like a mother who doesn't love her son?

"Do you have anyone to take care of you?"

"I don't know how this happened, this miracle...but I just know, in my heart of hearts, it was to show me...that every version of my son is a good one."

Tell me again that this woman is heartless and didn't want her son, I fucking dare you.

And we get more meaning to the name "Robin" and a little crumb about Tim's grandmother. As a treat.

This is all to say, please stop writing Janet Drake as a cold, heartless bitch.

Small final note though: Jack Drake is, in fact, a shitty person and a shitty father. He does still love Tim and Tim loves him AND THAT IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE, but the relationship is a mess. If either parent is actively abusive, it's 1000% Jack "smashed a TV because my son wasn't listening to me and threatened Bruce Wayne at gunpoint" Drake. Probably part of why the marriage was falling apart.

Anyway, yeah, let's retire the "Jack and Janet Drake are Bad Parents" tag and replace it with "Jack Drake is a Bad Parent" and "Janet Drake's C+ Parenting" or something.

[lunar-wandering]

things about the Boboiboy series that drive me NUTS (this list is written solely from memory)

the fact that the first three elements, Wind, Earth, and Lightning, didn't really start out as having different personality's from Boboiboy himself (at least, not by much/it wasn't extremely noticable) but then, Lightning, after being split for too long, losing his memories completely, and achieving tier 2, becoming Thunderstorm, suddenly goes all Edgy(TM). and then Wind eats a mood-changing potion and goes manic, and not only does that unlock his tier 2, making him Cyclone but that becomes his personality. like. hello??? the implications.... and then later on, Fire, Water, Leaf, and Light manifest WITH their personalities pre-set. what??? the vague implication that the elements are sentient and the personalities started becoming more obvious when Boboiboy's mind started slipping/letting them have freer reign haunts me every day.

speaking of Fire's manifestation. he initially manifested from the stress of exams and walked around accidentally burning shit down in the middle of the night. what a mood tbh.

if the elements are sentient, the implications of Retak'ka stealing them from Boboiboy and using them- without having his personality change, is INSANE. like bro. he used them as a weapon instead of letting them be actual people..... and then later on in the comics Thunderstorm gets taken away AGAIN and is trapped in a sword, a literal weapon, and is used. again. HELLO????

both of the first times Thunderstorm gets summoned (both the obvious first time and the first time after they all got reset to tier 1 due to Complications) involving his phobia kills me every time why the FUCK did they do that. they didn't even address it the second time around but they animated Lightning looking like he was in distress anyways. WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO HIM. i know he's the fave but like. was this necessary.

BOBOIBOY JUST DECIDING "Y'KNOW WHAT??? I'M GONNA INVENT FUSIONS NOW HERE WE GO" IN THE SECOND MOVIE AND PROCEEDING TO ABSOLUTELY WIPE THE FLOOR WITH RETAK'KA

i could list so much Thunderstorm stuff tbh he's definitely the fave they give him so many cool bits of animation. he does the "teleports behind you" move SO OFTEN and it's SO GOOD

Leaf's deadpan "Fashion Tragedy" line

that one time Boboiboy split into Fire, Wind, and Leaf, and EVERYONE agreed he shouldn't have done that and should never do it again cause those three have negative braincells when in a group together

the songs??? like. the opening songs. the insert songs used in the movies. the OST. why the hell are they so good. i mean i know i personally like em cause they tend to use rock. but like. its SO GOOD.

Yaya and Ying being arguably the two most powerful/capable members of the friend group as they should

that one time Thunderstorm and Fang fought and they paused right before hitting each other and the objects behind both of them exploded from the force of the other's attack

in the first movie when it hinted that we'd see Boboiboy without his hat for the first time ever throughout the entire movie and then it FINALLY HAPPENED when he caught a giant hammer right before it could hit him and punched the dude away with a blast of energy. he has a white streak in his hair and it's visible in the series from this point onwards.

I KNOW IVE SAID A LOT OF THUNDERSTORM SCENES BUT THAT POINT IN GALAXY WHERE HE WAS USING TIER 2 BEFORE HE SHOULD'VE BEEN USING IT AND HE KEPT SWAPPING IN BETWEEN BOBOIBOY AND THUNDERSTORM THROUGHOUT THE FIGHT??? THAT WAS COOL AS FUCK I LOVED THAT

i could list so many of the really cool shots from this series tbh. that one time Light slow-mo backflipped over a bunch of debris and then activated laser eyes to shoot at the villain is a highlight.

literally everything about the fact the plot of this show went from "aliens come to earth to steal chocolate" to "boboiboy nearly fucking dies on an almost daily basis"

[cosmerelists]

Five Questions I I Have about the Cosmere that I'm Too Afraid to Ask

Well, except that I suppose I am asking them, right now. These questions haunt me specifically because I think they have answers and that I should know what they are.

1. What Are Highspren the Manifestation Of?

This one I will sincerely accept an answer for, if anybody (or everybody?) knows. Like, rainspren are rain and honorspren are honor and liespren are lies. I get all that. Are highspren, like...the concept of highness? Like being high in the air? Is that something that gets anthropomorphized? I've read the Coppermind page a bunch of times and it feels like it doesn't specifically say.

What are they??

2. How do the bridges work?

You can try to explain this to me if you'd like but I don't think I'll get it because, well, this one is probably down to my difficulty in picturing things like this. But I just don't understand how the manual bridges in Sadeas' army actually worked. Like, they are pushed across the gap, right? So they have to long enough that they don't just tip in halfway across. Are they just like triple the size of every gap? Also, when they get placed side to side so that a line of horses can run across them--wouldn't they have to be like right against each other so there aren't gaps? How do you do that if you have people holding them on both sides? Can you really push them together if they're that long and most of it is on the other side of the gap already? I just have never been able to picture it, even a little.

3. DO we know what caused the Recreance?

In one of my other posts I expressed a hope that we would learn what caused the Recreance, and several people commented that we knew already [SPOILERS]: that it was because the Radiants learned that their powers destroyed their last planet so they all gave up their oaths. But is that really...it? I don't mean to downplay the destruction of a planet but, like, the current Radiants know that too and none of them seemed even slightly tempted to give up their powers. I just feel like there must be more to it than that...right? Some other, more terrible secret? But is this just me missing the point?

4. Where does the joke about Szeth being good at ice skating come from??

This one drives me nuts because I'm sure I should know. I assume it's something from the Battle of Thaylen City when he was with Lift, but the Coppermind article doesn't say a whole lot about his part in that fight. And I just don't remember. And I'm too lazy to look it up. Please somebody save me.

5. Are there...holidays in the Cosmere?

This is one that's been in the back of my mind for a while. Like...I have no idea what the yearly holidays are on Roshar, or Scadrial, or really any of the planets. I'm not clear if people celebrate their birthdays with a party or go out to dinner on their wedding anniversaries or celebrate the new year. I guess maybe because the books are always taking place in crises? So there's no time for Kaladin to go shopping for a midwinter crab-turkey or whatever? Or for Vin to be buying balloons for Elend's big day? But seriously--do you folks know of any holidays that characters are said to celebrate in times of not-crisis?

[dallasgallant]

“Ain’t nobody call the Fuzz in this neighborhood cause they know better!”

This line sits with me as a very telling one that often goes overlooked, as it’s lost in the blur of energy before the rumble. Now most of this is going to be from existing knowledge but it did prompt me to dig into poor communities a bit more. The line is said differently between the Book and the movie but both are said within the idea of pride and community— when they’re caught up in the high of before a rumble, all the energy close to bursting out of them- repping their kind and going on this spree of yelling stereotypes and taking ownership. In the movie Steve’s much more happy and hyped as he yells it— in the book he also says it to correct Darry but in a more exact tone.

In a surprise to no one cops aren’t friends to poor communities. Economically poor, crime heavy communities tend to be over policed and often met with force, brutality etc. We know the boys get hauled in a lot, sometimes just for the assumption they did something. Cops pick out, they stereotype and often target within the neighborhood.

There’s a social aspect as well that’s not so direct to do with police action and that is the social isolation. Lack of resources, mistreatment and disapproval from those outside creates strong communities that further isolate. In a lot of ways it’s a helpful thing, mitigating the effects of poverty by having a social net and trust. A detail I like is that Darry seems to be a part of a phone tree when Pony was late the first time (not exclusive to poor areas but a great example of having networks.) People help each other out “help their own” building networks. A lot of work is under the table or can be barter based - questionable legality of work, building/fixing things, way of general running of life. Perception of law is different.

This isn’t to say everyone in the neighborhood has broken the law at some point but it’s likely a lot have at least something of questionable legality or more likely have family members who are greasers, criminals etc but will protect them. All of the guys instantly flock to go help Dally after he robbed the store and have been stated to hide and protect the guys whenever they do something like this. It comes back to the “help/protect your own” … no one in the neighborhood is calling the cops because they know what will happen if they do. A family member or friend might be taken in, potential brutality, people coming in and uprooting the way you live your life because it’s “abnormal” etc etc etc.

If someone does call the cops who do you think they’re going to help? A bunch of no good, greasy hoods or the nice boys from the other side of town with their khakis and new cars and clothes? It was probably a greaser who threw the first punch too… doesn’t matter their side of town or what its over, or if some Soc is standing over some bleeding greaser kid. It’s systemic. (An aside but this is also why it drives me nuts people would assume the boys to be bigots because they’re … lower class in the 60s… let’s do some introspection there. Added to the fact that, there’s a lot of overlap with racial issues, their community would likely be FAR more integrated than the west or even rest of the town. Not that their wouldn’t be ignorance but the assumption— that’s not the point of this post but a pet peeve of mine)

Anyways, the Outsiders often gets reduced to a simplistic “use vs them” of just Greaser vs prep like it’s one of the beach movies they watch. When in reality it’s actually a lot to do with class and societal expectations/conditioning.

—

Papers if interested Here and here

Either for general interest or potentially helping with writing. Ones an older study (which skimming and certain sections I found interesting), the other IS Wikipedia but it’s for the general idea

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

idk if this is something you would answer but how do you unlearn shame of being horny 😵‍💫

hi anon,

this is a complex question. unlearning shame of any kind can take a long time to sort out, and will be driven more by internal work you do to challenge and shift your own thinking than by anything else.

a good place to start may be by doing some reflection as to what you find shameful about being horny in the first place and working back from there to recognize sexuality and desire as morally neutral things.

for instance, I get a fair number of people asking if it's okay to think about real people that they know when they're horny, or masturbate to fantasies about those people. they feel a lot of shame about this, as if they're causing harm to these people by imagining them in sexual scenarios. but making up funny little scenarios in your head to nut to is a harmless act that only you will ever know about. it's not like whipping out your dick (gender neutral) and masturbating at strangers on public transit; what you do to get off in your private time only impacts you.

a problem would only arise if you decided to start treating your real, actual acquaintance, not the imaginary sexy version of them, differently, for instance by making untoward comments about their body, treating them as if they are obligated to be interested in spending time together or having sex with you, or, god forbid, telling them in detail about your sexual fantasies. now you're doing sexual harassment, which is inappropriate because of the hurt and discomfort is causes the recipient. being horny isn't the problem here, it's how you're treating another person.

people also feel a lot of shame around many other types of fantasies, especially if they involve dynamics that are off-limits or illegal in real life. often, the worry seems to be that being aroused by these imagined scenarios is akin to expressing support for these things to happen in real life.

listen: sexual fantasies about rape are some of the most commonly reported among cis women, and that's not because tons and tons of cis women secretly think that rape is a cool thing that should happen more. the people playing Baldur's Gate 3 and fucking Halsin while he's wildshaped into a bear aren't all chomping at the bit to commit a sex crime against a real animal. noticing that "teenage" characters on TV played by actors in their 20s and 30s are hot does not make anyone a pedophile. fiction is a safe realm to explore and enjoy things that we would never in a million years want to see happen in real life. I love Batman, but I can assure you I would not be a happy camper if a real-life billionaire started running around doing vigilantism in a fursuit while endangering a gaggle of teenage sidekicks.

and if you want to explore some of the stuff you're into in real life, awesome! great! there are ways to go about negotiating a lot of different kinks safely and responsibly (although probably not the bear thing, sorry about that). the world is full of people who want the experience of being stalked, beat up, kidnapped, and sexually assaulted - all mediated through pre-negotiated arrangements with people that they have chosen to enact these fantasies with them. so what is there to be ashamed of in that situation? sure, the situation you're engaging in might sound scary without proper context, but so do a lot of things. a stranger cutting open my skin, very likely causing bleeding, and leaving me with a mark that I'll have for the rest of my life sounds scary, and it definitely would be if it wasn't a situation that I agreed to! but that's also what getting a tattoo is, and that's an experience that I love so much that I pay for the pleasure. nothing to feel bad about there as long as you're playing safely!

listen: there's nothing wrong with being horny. the human sex drive is a completely natural one born from biological need that makes getting off feel good. there's no more sense in feeling shame about being horny than there is in feeling shame about being hungry or needing rest, although people do of course manage to feel bad about those as well. regardless of what causes it, when you feel the shame well up you have to push back on it and ask yourself who actually directly benefits from you feeling badly about yourself in that moment, and who is actually tangibly hurt by the actions you're shaming. and if the answer is "no one," move it along!

[queenlucythevaliant]

Okay, here we go. Rating literary allusions in Taylor Swift songs:

The Outside: "I tried to take the road less traveled by /but nothing seems to work the first few times/am I right?"--Starting off pretty well! She tried to take the road less traveled by, but it didn't make any difference. 8/10

Love Story: Whole song allusion to Romeo and Juliet-- All those 2008 jokes about Taylor not having read R&J weren't funny then and they aren't funny now. It's a fun, satisfying subversion. However, I am going to dock points for the fact that Romeo and Juliet aren't a prince and princess, just rich. 7/10

Love Story: "You were Romeo/I was a scarlet letter"--Is the Juliet character in "Love Story" being publicly shamed? Did she do something scandalous? There are zero other lines in this song to suggest that she did, and a fair amount of evidence that she didn't. This allusion confuses rather than clarifies and tbh this is the one people should've made fun of in 2008. 2/10

New Romantics: "We show off our different scarlet letters/ trust me, mine is better" --Hooray! She figured out what the book is about! This is a beautifully executed allusion, where "scarlet letters" represents a mark of something shameful which, in a fun subversion, is being shown off with pride. Fits the song really well. Most improved award, 11/10

Getaway Car: "It was the best of times, the worst of crimes" (A Tale of Two Cities) -- Goes in the category of "fun wordplay, but doesn't really mean anything deeper" 5/10

This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things: "Feeling so Gatsby for that whole year" --This is a perfectly serviceable allusion, but not a super interesting one. Sub "Gatsby" out with "nostalgic" and the song wouldn't change at all. She could've done a lot more with the reference, given the subject matter of the song. 6/10

cardigan: "I knew you/tried to change the ending/Peter losing Wendy" -- This works! You get a sense of Betty losing her innocence and choosing to leave James and of it being inevitable somehow. Plus, it imbues the song with a lovely fairy tale quality. 10/10

illicit affairs: "take the road less traveled by/tell yourself you can always stop" -- To take the road less traveled by is to do something risky, unpopular, or unfamiliar, not just to take a route through town where you won't run into people. Not totally egregious, but the regression from Debut is disappointing. 4/10

invisible string: "and isn't it just so pretty to think/ that all along there was some/ invisible string tying you to me."(The Sun Also Rises)--Ugggggh. Okay, so "Isn't it pretty to think so?" is this sad, tired, ironic note in The Sun Also Rises. Brett tells Jake, "We could have had a damned good time together" and Jake says "Isn't it pretty to think so?" because their whole situationship was never going to work. It's not a positive thing; it's pure, bitter Lost Generation irony. Completely out-of-place in a song about how two people we're supposed to believe will actually work as a couple. This one drives me nuts, and I don't even like Hemingway. 0/10

happiness: "I hope she'll be a beautiful fool/ who takes my spot next to you" (Gatsby)--Saying this about an ex's future SO is so... off. Like, the reason why Daisy hopes her daughter will be a beautiful fool is because it's easy. The two situations have nothing to do with one another, and not in an interesting way. 1/10

The Albatross: whole song allusion to "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner," but most notably "She's the albatross/ she is here to destroy you"--The albatross in the Rime is a good omen. The Mariner shoots is for no reason, and the albatross's death is the ostensible source of bad fortune. I wrote a whole separate post on this here. That said, culturally "albatross=bad omen" is common enough, so whatever. 3/10

I Hate It Here: "I will go to secret gardens in my mind/ people need a key to get to/ the only one is mine" -- I like this one a lot. Exactly the right vibe for the song, trying to escape something miserable by going somewhere pleasant. The key is a nice touch. Poor Archibald. 10/10

The Prophecy: "I got cursed like Eve got bitten" --No Taylor, that's not what happened. Famously, Eve was the biter in that situation. 0/10

Cassandra: whole song allusion -- correct me if I'm wrong (I haven't actually read the Illiad), but my understanding is that Cassandra died fairly far into the Trojan war, and not by burning. 4/10

[artful-aries]

Thoughts On Marriage + How They Would Propose (Xiao, Alhaitham, Itto)

Xiao:

​​In all likelihood, he wouldn’t really think about marriage nor want it

​​It’s not that he doesn’t love you, far from it; Xiao just has a hard time wrapping his brain around this mortal idea

​​He’s already sworn himself to you, isn’t that enough?

​​If you stress how important it is to you, or explain that marriage would just make his oath visible for everyone to see, he would consider it

​​If he eventually does decide to marry you, don’t expect his proposal to be grand or thought out

​​Xiao would likely just come up to you and say, “I have considered this ‘marriage’ that you spoke of, and I will do the ceremony with you. How do we get married?”

​​It’s almost endearing to see how puzzled he is by the concept, but it means a lot that he is stepping out of his comfort zone for you

​​He does eventually get you a ring; in fact, he makes the ring himself with the help of Cloud Retainer of course, but he would rather die than admit he needed assistance

​​Xiao thinks it is probably best that Cloud Retainer took over the crafting anyhow; he already worried about his karmic debt tainting you, and constantly wearing a ring imbued with his powers might make some of that debt transfer to you

​​Even if Xiao does not cave to your desire to get married, he will always be with you, guarding you like he guards the people of Liyue

​​

​​Alhaitham:

​​He’s another one that wouldn’t be keen on the idea of marriage, but he’s not exactly opposed to it either

​​The idea just seems a bit trivial and almost taxing to him. Alhaitham would rather spend his time and energy on other things rather than a ceremony that ultimately wouldn’t change the way he feels about you

​​He loves you, and doesn’t want you going about something as troublesome as marriage just to prove something to yourself

​​The way to win him over is to present to him a pros and cons list. This will appeal to his logical side and show that you aren’t just blinded by your emotions when suggesting this, you’re giving it a lot of serious thought

​​He is surprisingly easy to convince once you’ve given him the list; even if he may not agree with all of your points on there, or has a few to add of his own, he does acknowledge that being married would reap more benefits than not

​​Once that is settled, he leaves the subject alone for a while, so long in fact that you think he has entirely forgotten or ignored the conversation

​​But then, he surprises you one evening by taking you to a nice dinner and presenting you the most gorgeous ring you have ever seen

​​He’s straightforward with his proposal, but you don’t miss the look of absolute adoration in his eyes as he says, “(Y/N), as we discussed prior, I would like for you to marry me. Would you do me the honor of allowing me to put this ring on your finger?”

​​

​​Itto:

​​He would act like he doesn’t think much of marriage. Chaining down the great Arataki Itto? As if!

​​Secretly though he’s obsessed with the idea. The mental image of you with a pretty little ring on your finger drives him nuts

​​Tries to hatch a plan with the boys to gather up enough money to buy you a ring so he can propose, but they end up losing steam after a week or two

​​Itto then goes to Shinobu for advice, who actually reorients their efforts quite well and somehow manages to make sure they don’t accidentally spill the beans about the proposal

​​Before long, Itto has a nice ring picked out and a grand plan to declare his love for you in front of all Inazuma city which Shinobu shuts down before it starts

​​With his initial plans rightfully thwarted, he can barely contain himself and proposes to you the next time you visit him and the gang

​​Itto is a bit cheesy with his proposal, but with his lopsided grin it’s hard to imagine saying no to that face

​​“(Y/N), babe, I love you. Would you…be the numero two of the Arataki Gang?”

​​Shinobu could strangle him for his poor choice of words, but seeing as though you’re happy regardless she lets it go

[chaifootsteps]

saying it's just about blitzstrike is really dumb, especially since I've seen you spend way more time unpicking the show's bad writing like most other critcal voices have. it doesn't make someone an automatic Blitzstrike shipper just because most of the bad writing centres around Stolas

also like - it kind of drives me nuts when people get their cart-horse order the wrong way around.

like they always phrase it as 'you just criticize X ship because you wanted Y ship instead!'

when sometimes it's more like 'the reason why someone prefers Y ship is because X ship is badly written or there's better chemistry/support for Y ship in the text'

like they always assume people ship out of some arbritrary bias and it can never be because they critically engaged with the text and realized there was more to chew on with Y ship or that X ship is would be deeply unhealthy and unpleasant if it became canon

like I have a soft spot for Blitzfizz as well as Blitzstrike. and that's mostly because while I like Blitzstrike for the matching enthusiasm over horses and eat the rich Bonny and Clyde thing they have, I think when I stop and analyze the text Blitzfizz is the ship that's actually satisfying.

and that isn't because I came into the show wanting to ship Blitz and Fizz. I didn't think much of it through all of s1 and liked Flitzodeus instead, back when they both had more attitude

it's only when s2 hit and Stol1tz moved into the category of 'completely unrecoverable and unshippable' for me that it made me think more about how Viv had accidentally written it so that Blitzfizz was the ship I actually wanted to happen, because of all the thematic mirrors and unresolved tension between the two characters. that it was the true childhood friends ship, unlike stol1tz

sorry if that's rambly, I hope it makes sense? it just annoys me because besides the fact that saying criticals are just bitter about ships being dismissive, the ones who do want something other than stol1tz aren't immediately wrong just because it's about a ship

same with people who ship Blitzo/Verosika or even Blitzo/M&M. sometimes there just is more to work with there while the main ship is drier than unseasoned chicken

and for a fandom who loves to cry 'homophobia' at people, they should probably stop and realize this exact argument - 'you're just bitter your ship didn't become canon!' - is levelled at people who ship m/m and f/f pairings all the time. they're told to sit down and shut up because their ship that probably has more chemistry than the official pairing never had a chance in the first place

but in this case the show does have a lot of m/m ships, but the ones that never had a chance are just the ones Viv refuses to explore because she can't have anything get in the way of Stolas being rewarded with the 'love' of his favorite sex slave

Just goes to show that none of these toxic people actually think about the sounds coming out of their mouths. They just say whatever they think will do the most damage in the moment, regardless of whether it's based in fact or whether it makes sense.

[bloggingboutburgers]

Starting off with, i love your comics, artstyle, and aro/ace and qpr rep! And i also wanted to thank you for your comics about being in a long distance relationship. I too am an European whose partners are off in another continent, and often have to hide or defend our relationship even just to be seen as an actual one, much less an out-of-amatonormativity one, so seeing that we are not alone, and the cute sides of something that 90% of the time is quite hard, is very comforting to me. Thank you for it and good luck with your book and life!

P. S.: the thing that will always stick to me is the little ‘wheee’ when passing by sidewalk poles. 100% doing it whenever there’s the chance

Honestly, receiving this makes ME feel less alone as well!! What you said about having to hide or defend a relationship due to it being long-distance touched me in a way I didn't expect. I took forever to tell most people who live in my country/continent about my partner for so many reasons. Because it was a queerplatonic relationship and I feared people wouldn't understand. Because I'd spent so long trying to make everyone understand I didn't need a romantic partner to be happy and I was afraid people would just amalgamate the notion of a queerplatonic relationship with me being "fixed". Because we're both afab and with some people I had fears of possible homophobia (which, thankfully, never happened, except with one person I think). And... Yeah, now that you mention it, the fact that they're so far away and I couldn't introduce it to them physically if they asked, unless they happened to be visiting.

I think having met online and relying on online means to have to communicate plays a lot into that, too. Even though for a while in 2020 and subsequent years, in my country and many others, it was kind of illegal to communicate with anyone but your immediate family any other way THAN online or by phone, because reasons, people still see online communication as automatically lesser and one that should be given less importance (which drives me nuts personally, because it wasn't until I could go online that I started making real friends, what with being bullied by a lot of middleschoolmates and whatnot). There was a time where my partner and I had to fight to even be given time and respect of said time when we were busy calling each other. There's a lot of obvious hardships and a lot of unspoken ones that I guess one only sees if one is in that situation. So... Thank you, soo, for making me feel less alone.

I sincerely wish you the best as well, and good luck to you guys too!

[a-secret-inner-life]

I came across a lot of stuff that I could relate to about autism while researching for a paper, which led me to do more research on autism in general. I saw some other people doing this type of post on here, so: autistic people, can you please read my super long and detailed list of possible symptoms I experience and tell me if it seems like I'm one of you? I'm trying to be objective and reasonable and figure out what's going on with myself here.

Sensory Stuff

I like to stim–bouncing my legs, tapping my feet when I sit, occasionally swinging my legs or rocking. I also clench my fists or sit on my hands a lot and tap my fingers on things, or just fiddle with whatever is in front of me. Recently, I count while touching my thumb to each of my fingertips to calm down because someone in a book I read did that and it actually does help me. I also sing the alphabet song repeatedly when I'm working on my website.

Sometimes when I'm very tired or overwhelmed my face feels itchy and I feel like every strand of hair touching me prickles and itches and leaves a red spot (but it doesn't actually).

I have a strong hatred for perfume because it smells too strong and fakey, and citrus scents also drive me nuts, but I really like scented candles.

I'm a super picky eater, although I'm not as bad as when I was a kid. I don't mind the taste of tomatoes, peppers, or onions in things, but I'm still a little grossed out when I know I'm eating them, and the texture of onions freaks me right out, as an example.

I get startled easily. Loud noises don't actually scare me, they just jolt me out of whatever thought space I was in before I heard them.

I also get overwhelmed whenever someone tries to talk to me in a loud car (whether it's loud with other people or just the engine), and I find it overwhelming and incredibly difficult to concentrate when more than one person is talking at once. Whenever I'm in a crowd, it just sounds like this vague roar that gets louder the more I think about it, which can sometimes be overwhelming. Still, I'm good at tuning some things out in select circumstances, like the TV when it's on.

Finally, if I pay attention at pretty much any time when there isn't a ton of other noise, I can hear ringing in my ears. This isn't usually upsetting, and I know it's fairly common for anyone to get tinnitus from time to time, but I'm not sure if most people experience it this much.

Social Stuff

I can not handle eye contact.

I'm also really, really, comically bad at social interactions. I almost never speak to someone I don't know well before they speak to me, and my go-to conversation method is to laugh/giggle and nod, I literally can not make actual conversation to save my life. Sometimes I think of things to say but it doesn't occur to me to say them, or I try to but I'm scared and can't find an opening, or I do say the thing and people don't react the way I want them to (usually it's either confusion or disinterest).

Old ladies are my favorite people because they're the least scary somehow. I also love kids, but I'm still awkward so I rarely interact and probably still freak them out.

I'm horrible at keeping contact and I wait until I know people are offline to reply to their messages because conversation is stressful and I need time to think when I text. Group chats are a nightmare, so I pretty much ghost everyone when I'm in one.

I'm super attached to my family, though. I make an effort to create a deep bond with each of my siblings, and I'm the clingiest person in the world when it comes to my older sister.

I value people very deeply, which might be why I find them so intimidating. I love them and I want them to be happy, and I put too much pressure on the situation.

I used to hate being alone, and I still feel guilty or sad whenever I spend too much time by myself, although I actually love to be by myself, a lot of my hobbies and favorite places are solitary, and I usually prefer figuring things out on my own rather than having somebody right there trying to figure it out with me.

I'm incredibly empathetic. It's not like I can automatically sense people's emotions, but I do make an effort to pay attention and understand what they're feeling and why they feel that way. My siblings come and rant to me a lot, and I can be a good diplomat and see both points of view when they argue. I also care, and I always want to make people feel better, though it obviously doesn't always work. Sometimes I'm too empathetic, or maybe too creative, and I stress out about what someone might be feeling when I don't know if it's an actual issue or not.

Patterns and Stuff

I've always been good at remembering my parents’ phone numbers and our zip code, as well as my friends’ birthdays. I work at a grocery store where I find myself reciting the regular customers’ lottery numbers in my head as they're saying them to me.

My dad used to have a verbal checklist of what to bring to work each morning, and I still recite it every time I hear the words “wallet” and “keys” next to each other. Same goes for my old morning checklist that I don't even follow anymore.

I don't adhere to a strict routine in terms of the general structure of my day, but I definitely have a system or pattern for a lot of my specific activities.

Emotional Stuff

I've been obsessed with drawing and painting for as long as I can remember. I write all the time. I think I dedicated myself and a huge chunk of my life to my hobbies. If I like something, I like to think that I make it my own, and that thing permeates who I am.

When I first started listening to BTS, I scoured literally the entire Internet to find every possible hidden track any of the members ever touched, and there were A LOT. Lately I've been obsessed with Keeper of the Lost Cities, and I can't stop talking about the books. I'm also hyper fixated on Tomorrow X Together.

When I start something, I need to finish it, and I'll often think I'm so close to being done only to continue on it for several more hours, trying to hurry up and finish because I need to get it done now. I'm also pretty bad at switching tasks. I try to multitask, but it doesn't really work out.

I can easily forget about my own physical needs; particularly I don't usually realize when I'm hungry. Overall my needs are very flexible to the people around me; if you want to eat together, suddenly I'm hungry, if you don't feel like stopping, neither do I.

I'm a perfectionist, but I hate asking for help. This is especially true when it comes to my grades and my hobbies. I'm more comfortable when I can control the variables and nobody has to know if I fail.

I'm pretty sure I have executive dysfunction because I put so much pressure on doing things perfectly that I lose the motivation to do them at all, and as much as I need to get something done, I can't make myself do it.

Since I was little I've always been awkward and out of place. I feel like I take up too much space. Honestly, I feel like my existence is lame and embarrassing. I hate myself.

I absolutely suck at decision making, sometimes because I don't want to choose something that other people won't like and partially because I'm just really indecisive. Often I feel stuck or paralyzed because I can't choose one way or another.

Along those same lines, the responsibility of being told to do something for someone else is terrible, and I hate doing these things without incredibly specific instructions because I'm scared of messing up.

I also need to know exact details of whatever activity I'm doing before I do it, and I hate when something big isn't planned out in detail.

I used to have a lot of meltdowns as a child. I’d yell and cry and throw things when I was upset. This still happens sometimes, but not as frequently or as badly.

I feel guilty about everything, including mistakes from years ago that shouldn't matter anymore. This makes me feel sort of unworthy (?), like anything good I do is the bare minimum and if I cause a problem (through anxiety or executive dysfunction) that messes up a project, I feel like I have to do everything else perfectly to make up for it, although I usually end up feeling like I'm coddling myself instead.

I constantly compare myself to others. If someone else has a problem that's worse than what I deal with, I feel like I'm not allowed to have my own negative feelings.

I feel like none of my feelings are valid. I feel and think all sorts of dramatic things that seem like the end of the world, but compared to others, my problems are small, and I feel stupid for having them. I almost wish I had a bigger issue or more dangerous mental problems that would make my responses more reasonable, but my logical side knows that this thinking is wrong.

I've been dealing with off and on burnout since I was around twelve years old (so about five years). I've been told over and over that my mindset is wrong and I need to do a million things better mentally to be less of a perfectionist, but I don't have the energy to put in any effort whatsoever to fix myself. I still get random bursts of motivation that last for short periods of time, though.

Sometimes when I go to bed after a stressful day, I wake up in the morning and I have this uncontrollable dread about starting my day. The thought of getting up sounds impossible, and it's almost like there's something sitting in my chest keeping me down.