#actually i’m ignoring everything after season 2 sue lmao

[blossoms-and-possums]

THANK YOU FOR THE PERMISSION AHAHHAA I WILL I WILL GO INTO HEAVY DETAIL

in this essay i will explore how in a marauders x glee au, sue sylvester would be professor mcgonagall :)

both sue and mcgonagall are sharp-tongued, strong willed, passionate characters. i propose that mcgonagall and sue are the same character in (very) different fonts.

okay, so, the first time we are introduced to sue sylvester in glee, she is coaching the cheerios (‘you think this is hard? try being water boarded, that’s hard. you’re sloppy! sloppy babies!’). sue loves her cheerios. they are her whole life. she gets them to nationals i think 5 consecutive years in a row. she wants the cheerios to win.

now. who is another teacher who is deeply passionate for a school sport’s team, to the extent that she’s willing to waive a centuries’ old rule to allow an eleven year old boy to join the team because he’s good enough to help her team win? mcgonagall. look me in the eye and tell me that that is not something sue sylvester would do. you can’t. mcgonagall watches every game, she was on the quidditch team herself back in her school years, and she enables lee jordan’s commentary, despite its vulgarity. she wants gryffindor to win.

something else to note is that sue does not initially hate will sch*e or the glee club. like. at all. the only reason she interferes at first is because the glee club threatens her cheerios budget. that is, sue interferes when she is directly involved. sue then, after this threat, takes a disliking to wills and begins insulting him. (‘oh hey will, i thought i smelled failure’)

in the order of the phoenix, mcgonagall begins to have a (noticeable) disliking for umbridge when she sits in mcgonagall’s class and threatens her teaching credibility (and is thus directly involved). so she then insults umbridge (smth smth harry’s grades in dada have been good when taught by a ‘competent teacher’) and responds to harry yelling at umbridge with positive reinforcement (‘have a biscuit, potter’).

the comparison above demonstrates that sue and mcgonagall need a catalyst to spark their dislike of someone, and their catalysts and consequent actions are very similar.

there are definitely parallels between sue and mcgonagall. does mcgonagall go around pushing students down the stairs or destroying offices when she doesn’t get her way? not that we’ve seen. but she does, occasionally, offer sound advice. and so does sue! in her own way!

there’s that moment in season one with kurt, where he’s having an identity crisis, and in her own sue sylvester way, she almost gives good advice: ‘that’s the problem with your generation, you’re obsessed with labels. so you like show tunes! that doesn’t make you gay. it just means you’re awful. you know, there’s only one person in this world who can tell you what you are.’ ‘me.’ ‘no. me. sue sylvester.’ and up until the last bit, sue has a point!

and if you’re looking for a more serious argument about sue, may i direct your attention to the grilled cheesus episode. here, kurt’s, one of the glee kids, dad has a heart attack. kurt is atheist and asked the glee club to respect his beliefs and not pray for him and his dad through religious music in front of him. you’ll never guess what the glee club do (they disrespect kurt’s wishes repeatedly and even go into kurt’s dad’s hospital room to pray without asking kurt but i digress). and the teacher that gave kurt the opportunity to complain to the school faculty for the glee club imposing religion in a nondenominational school was sue. sue is showing kurt a duty of care where mr sch*e, emma pillsbury, and principal figgins, fail.

yes, sue saw it as an opportunity to attack the glee club, but she also has a poignant scene where she discusses her own relationship with faith. when talking to emma pillsbury, who attacks sue for getting kurt to complain about the unasked for religiousness, it’s sue that points out emma’s, and the glee kids’ hypocrisy.

sue: asking someone to believe in a fantasy, however comforting, isn’t a moral thing to do. it’s cruel

emma: if that’s what you believe then fine. just don’t go around (something along the lines of pushing it down other peoples throats)

sue: as long as you do the same. that boy could lose his father at any moment.

the glee kids make comments about kurt’s lack of faith & disrespect his lack of faith, and then get frustrated and upset when kurt asks them to stop praying at him. mercedes even asks kurt to go to her church with her. like. ???? (this episode is wild i urge you to watch it right now)

my point is, is this is the kind of behaviour we can expect to see from mcgonagall. in goblet of fire, she’s protective of harry and is one of the only people who don’t want to let him compete. ‘potter is a boy, not a piece of meat!’ it’s mcgonagall that helps harry get to dumbledore’s office when he has a nightmare about arthur weasley in ootp. it’s mcgonagall showing a duty of care where every other teacher fails.

also i feel like if mcgonagall were to wear muggle clothes it would be an adidas tracksuit

anyway that’s my thesis thank u

If there were to exist a Glee x Marauders AU... who would be Sue???

[imagining-in-the-margins]

1. No, it’s not. But I recommend stopping at the S14 finale, which is where everything stops making sense.

Spoilers for S14 Finale

(I’m honestly shocked if you’ve managed to avoid them):

Even aside from the nonsense that is shoving Jeid down our throats after 14 years of nothing, it’s obvious as hell the showrunner changed her mind (she admitted so herself). When both of your actors avoid talking about the scene, you know you’ve made a mistake.

It completely ruined Rossi’s wedding and made everything until 15x02 so fucking uncomfortable I actually left the room. But more than anything, the unsub made no sense. I get it, cases are hard. But why the FUCK would he care if JJ liked Spencer? He didn’t know she was married, much less not married to him? He didn’t know anything about them? Why did they randomly throw in a line about Spencer being in prison just for the guy to discount it?

None of it made any sense. It was super bad.

2. Everything.

Season 15 Spoilers

From the jump, JJ’s stupid ass decision to pick up the gun? Why would she do that? Seriously, why? Like... Spencer was right there. Why wouldn’t she just stand there and radio for him? They weren’t gonna get the gun, how the fuck would they do that?

Essentially, S15 turns all of the characters into fucking idiots. Starting at the S14 finale, they cheapen Spencer and JJ’s friendship AND JJ’s marriage. It turned it all into boy and girl can’t be friends, and I’ll never forgive them for it. It would have made eons more sense if it was a Jemily confession.

But beyond that, the only other episodes I’ve seen so far are Saturday and Date Night - two of the worst written episodes I’ve ever seen in this show. We ignore it because everyone loves Cat Adams, but that’s actually why I hate them. Also...

Max is a raging Mary Sue. 

She is a self-insert garbage character that I’m convinced was never supposed to exist. She was thrown in to make Spencer “normal” instead of just letting him be autistic. She’s rude to him and he doesn’t care because... they need him to not care about it. Her storyline makes no sense. She’s just meant to “fix” Spencer’s autism bc that’s the only way he could be happy and in love, right? If he’s “normal?”

You’re telling me that Spencer Reid, seasoned profiler and almost murderer who was imprisoned, REALLY thinks that his Mary Sue girlfriend is capable of murder? Look me in my eyes and tell me that. That’s the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever heard in my entire fucking life.

Even further, you’re telling me ACTUAL murderer, prolific hitwoman, and genius Cat Adams believes this random girl saying she murdered someone? The same girl who called Spencer on every bluff except the one about her father? ARE YOU JOKING?

Then the whole making Spencer super hot for Cat thing. She tried to murder his mother. She also either ordered someone to r*pe him, or at least made him believe it happened. Come on, man. I get it, it’s hot, whatever, but it really shouldn’t have been canon. It was just some horny writer being weird. Not to mention, it canonically made Spencer a cheater. 

I will never get over that scene - let’s walk through this from an unbiased perspective please:

Girlfriend witnesses boyfriend making out with murderer who tried to murder his mother and your family. Girlfriend says, “Hey, you seemed real into that kiss?”

Boyfriend laughs and goes “Haha, yep! Sure was.”

Girlfriend laughs and goes “Haha, you like the bad girls.”

Boyfriend who has never once shown a single interest in anyone even remotely resembling a bad girl ever in 15 seasons, “Yeah, usually. But I like you, good girl I just cheated on!”

Girlfriend is happy. “Let’s kiss!”

What the fuck. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE.

GIRL. L E  A V E H I M.

This isn’t even to mention that Spencer in 15x02 goes “I can’t imagine a life where I’m not waiting for JJ” to “I’m ready to move on with Max” in Saturday to “I’m hot for Cat” in Date Night to “Maeve is the only woman I’ve ever loved.” 

Pick a fucking lane, bro.

There’s a lot more I’ve heard but haven’t seen yet that is a disaster (including the continuity error where “Rossi knows the jet better than anyone” when he literally didn’t know it existed before he returned to the BAU - JJ and Spencer know it better than him). But I haven’t watched it yet so, guess we’ll find out then.

3-4. Hahah this made me laugh because my immediate answer was... 2008. I actually used to have a MGG/Spencer Reid blog in 2011. Let that sink in.

I think my rewatch started Dec 2019? I don’t remember. We took a lot of breaks, including a couple months between S12-13 since we bought them. I watched S13-14 in a week, lmao. We’ll probably finish S15 this week.

5. Awwwwe ewok baby! Clearly from how much I just typed in this massive rant, my arm is feeling somewhat better. I hope it is fully healed in a couple days, but until then I’m mostly just writing bar prep essays.

[dcoolettes]

Fandoms I’m in

Better make this post know so people know what the fuck I post 99% of the time

Major Fandoms

DnD- I’m just a huge DnD nerd. I write campaigns and characters constantly and nothing can stop be because apparently I don’t burn out when it comes to DnD

DragonLance- Techinally also DnD, but I’m talking about the books here. I’m a huge Dragonlance nerd and yes I’m writing a letter to Wizards of the Coast for 5E Dragonlance books. Anyways I’m a huge huge huge Dragonlance fan, and will talk for hours.

Critical Role- I enjoy this DnD show so much!!! Ah!!! I’ve only watched the second season, and I’ve seen the first episode of Campaign one. CR really kicked off my DnD group and my passion for DnD got super reignighted. I’m a huge fan of all the characters, and the cast is great. (I tag spoilers for everything leading up to and past episode 26, cuz my brother watches cr and he’s only on episode 18-19 I believe.)

The Adventure Zone, All Campaigns- I also listen to TAZ! Just a great show, and I binged most of it while on a road trip. The headphones gave me an ear infection but the show is amazing and I’ve cried SEVERAL times. My favorite mini series is dust, but I LOVE the entire show. Actually got me into urban shadows as well!!

Puella Magi Madoka Magica + Spin offs- Lesbians. I love Magical Girl anime and manga, and I actually got introduced to Madoka because I grabbed it off a bookshelf ina rush to get manga at a bookstore. Basically it’s become a super important interest of mine because HOLY SHIT THE SUBTEXT. I also fucking LOVE magireco (Magia Record) and I’ve been grinding the newest event all day!

Dungeon Meshi/ Delicious in Dungeon- I just got into this manga but BOY OH BOY do I love it. It’s an interesting take on traditional fantasy manga and troupes, as well as a fun spin on cooking manga. I love it so much!!! I love the lore and the thought put into each of the dishes and dungeon levels, as well as the parties interactions with eachother. Plus gay subtext!

Pokémon- Do I need to explain this one or- I’ve been playing Pokémon as long as I’ve been on the internet, aka most of my life. It’s a very important series to me, and the content the fandom produces is just d e lightful. Sableye is my favorite Pokémon!

Homestuck/Hiveswap- I'm less active in this Fandom (Until act 2 comes out) but Hs is one of my longest standing fandoms (besides Pokemon!). I finished reading after the comic had ended, (ignoring epilogues hahahahhahahaha I can't read them because it's gonna fuck me up) and it left an impact on me! It's a good series man. Just, not for everyone.

Minor Fandoms

Danganronpa- I used to be super big into it but now it's more of a minor thing. Might rb some ishimondo stuff once in a blue moon but it's not like, major fandom stuff

Persona 5- I enjoy the game and I'm gay for Futaba but I mostly rb shit for my bro!

FNAF- Hahaha yeah I like the robot furry horror game sue me

Sonic- used to not care about but my passion got reignited after I got over some stuff. I love these games even if Sega shits out charmless games nowadays. Sonic mania is ,,, good.

Various other anime and manga- Soul eater, promised Neverland, ect ect.

That's what I'll be posting! These aren't in any particular order lmao