#actually i don't sweeten my coffee

[ramshacklefey]

One of my favorite things about adulthood is turning foods that were rare treats into normal parts of meals.

Like. You can just. Put maple syrup on things that aren't pancakes. Oatmeal? Maple syrup. Toast? Maple syrup. Coffee? Sweetened with fucking maple syrup.

[kradogsrats]

I hope Claudia steels the coffee beens from some xadian garden/plantation for the shop, and then if she ever gets caught she's like hahaha I could be taking your bones, jk unless?

like her pancakes, Claudia's coffee is so delicious because something got squished for it

[shotmrmiller]

response to this but it got so long and ig im in my throuple era rn

@xoxunhinged i listened to one (1) song on repeat while writing this on the phone

okay yeah wait or just

it's ghost x price first.

Big burly men taking up too much space in the little coffee shop you work at or something and they're there like clockwork too. Every wednesday and friday, 8 am, usually the first clients of the day and all they order is a regular cup of joe. Plain. You offer alternative sweeteners, powdered creamer, but no dice.

Plain black. Like the occasional smudge of eyeliner(?) around the bigger one's eyes.

They're cute, in their own way. John is a blend of rugged charm and seasoned wisdom. The other, Simon, is mysterious. Guarded. Speaks only to his companion.

The pet names start to get to your head. Of course, you reason that John's just not from around here. His calling you sweetheart from across the room to grab your attention must be English.

But logic cannot stop the heat from licking up your cheeks when he does. or when Simon calls you something different altogether eventually.

"Mornin', pet."

It's even more gut-twisting when you catch glimpses of the occasional PDA: A large hand curling around an even bigger jean-clad thigh. Faces so close they could kiss (Waterboarding couldn't get the fact that you've rubbed your thighs together at the thought of them actually kissing out of you) and the fact that Simon's usually sharp gaze softens around the edges, pale gold whispering against the puckered pink of a barely visible scar beneath his face mask.

A couple. They're a couple. It's bittersweet, that feeling settling in your chest. Like dark chocolate coating your tongue. Honeyed nectar of love, the bitter bite of it not being your own.

Maybe it's time to go out with your friends to the bar.

Things take a nasty turn when Simon, out of the both of them, had come in alone and propositioned you on crisp, saturday morning.

Oh, the acid in your stomach felt like it was corroding the walls of your esophagus as it rose. You don't remember much of what you said but it'd been loud, vitriolic. You'd been so furious. Hurt that they had something so sweet, something they could call their own, and here comes this big dumb oaf looking for a piece of warm meat to stick his cock into on the side.

Your manager sent you home for the day.

And home you were headed, well more like the bus stop, stomping away and across the street but the hand that wraps around your arm to keep you in place is John's. (You'd been actually fighting to get away and he hadn't even tightened his grip enough to hurt. embarrassing.)

He clears things up. Tells you to forgive Simon, he's not the most verbose or eloquent with the words he does choose to speak. "He's good at receivin' orders instead of givin' 'em. isn't tha' righ'?"

The "yes, sir" that comes out of Simon is immediate. Obedient. Submissive. (gagging, i actually slammed the desk with my fist rn) A man who knows his place because it is etched in stone. Your teeth grind like rusted gears to keep from turning into a pool of liquid in broad daylight.

"What he meant," he roughly clarifies, "is that we would like you to share our bed." your face burns hot enough to sting. "If you want," John continues, limpid blue eyes fixed on your own.

He looks rather handsome in his uncertainty.

They don't even let you go home to wash and clean up when you nod. (Or shave. Simon had very audibly scoffed at your complaint about that. Said something crass about eating lollipops off the carpet)

The dynamic had been exactly what you'd expected it to be in the bedroom. When authority spoke, Simon listened. Intently. Without hesitation. When John ordered Simon— who'd sat with his broad chest curling around your spine, cocooning you in warmth and the faint scent of smoke, mahogany, and leather— to hook his hands behind your knees and pull your legs up to your shoulders, he'd done so in an instant.

The subtle burn of your hamstrings stretching pulled a hiss from your kiss-swollen lips.

"Bit o' pain with pleasure never hurt anyone, eh, sweetheart?" The deepened rumble of John's voice vibrated in your chest and made your toes curl.

Simon's steady breaths are drowned out by your shuddering ones when John puts his mouth on you, the prickle of his facial hair tickling your sensitive, heated skin.

The burning stretch of your muscles is nothing compared to the sweet sting of two fingers sinking into your hot sex. Pleasure wells in the corner of your eyes when he curls and scissors them while his slick tongue swirls your clit languidly.

He sends you over the edge with practiced ease, shaky limbs, and unsteady mewls. The kiss he plants on your still pulsing cunt is tender, as are your now unrestrained legs.

And he slants his lips-- still dripping slick, dewy beads collecting on his beard-- over Simon's whose mask is now long gone, his erection coming to sit heavy on the fatty mound of your pussy. You can feel the heat of his cock even through his clothes.

A saliva strand connecting them two snaps as he pulls away, glancing down to look at you, sweaty and unkempt, glassy eyes shamelessly staring back.

"I'd let Simon get his turn but," hands weave up your shirt and inside your sports bra while John's grab your legs and wrap them around his thick waist, "gotta prep ya first."

(?)

That comes back to mind after your limbs feel like cold syrup, warmth dribbling from your puffy lips and falling onto the damp bedsheets beneath your arse cheeks.

The question answers itself when Simon slots himself between your aching legs, uncut cock fat and hefty.

(dis)Respectfully, you feel thoroughly used and even now, that doesn't look like it's going to go in easy.

"Easy, love," John's voice comes from above you, "He won't hurt ya. Isn't tha' righ', Simon?"

Simon, who's dark eyes hadn't moved from where John's spend still steadily flowed, cut to him instantly. "Yes, sir."

He hums, a low, raspy sound. "How 'bout you tell our bird tha'?"

A rough hand wraps around your neck, thumb pressed on your fluttering pulse. "I won't hurt ya." His grip tightens, and the swoosh of blood roaring in your ears is deafening.

Much.

The world around you fades, senses attuned only to what's currently wrenching your swollen walls apart, going in, in, and in, it feels never-ending, it's so much, too much, until--

Your stomach clenches, it feels like it's folding in on itself, and a sharp feeling radiates below your navel.

Lips kiss your sweaty temple. "That's all there is. Did so well, eh, sweetheart? Took 'im real good, like you were meant for it."

His cock drags along your over-sensitive, raw nerves in a way that has fire licking up your spine as he pulls back. "Easy, Simon. You'll get your fun from me," John assures.

Your cunt clenches unbidden at that, vise-like around Simon who quietly groans.

The first roll of his hips pushes the air from your lungs, the second blanks your jumbled mind, the third has your nails sinking into whoever's forearms are beside your head, and the fourth has you confusing John's glittering eyes with stars.

And then he places your feet flat on his chest, his weight folding you in half, pinning you in place. Nowhere to run.

Your teeth clack when he thrusts firmly, tip of his cock sitting firmly against the plug of your womb.

"Easy does it, love. Jus' be good 'n take it," John mutters into your ear.

As if you had any choice.

After, when you're completely spent, they tell you to lay back, head propped up by a mountain of pillows, but to keep your legs open, let them see that pretty pussy, they want to see their cum spill out of you.

You thought the fucking Simon gave you had been rough. What John gives him from behind is attempted murder. He grabs at Simon's hair like it's the scruff of a bellicose dog. Pins him in place with his words, growled, thunderous, then his grip. Simon doesn't bare his crooked teeth once.

When your tired hand slithers down to between your legs, tips of your fingers smearing cum around your swollen flesh, arousal surprisingly panging deep in your core, the sheer force of John's thrusts rocks the bed with enough force to crack the wall and Simon whines like a dog in heat.

[barcaatthemoon]

what u need || emily engstler x reader ||

You have Emily over while your roommate is out of town.

Emily was a bit of a cliche. You wondered if she had been this way in college. You couldn't help but imagine Emily toting around that stupid black backpack as she made personal visits to whatever girl she was hooking up with that week's dorm. Emily assured you that she wasn't like that, that she never had been and still wasn't, but you knew the truth.

You could see the way that Emily held herself. She knew her way around a bedroom in the way that only came with experience. You were far from the first girl that she had fucked around with, and you weren't going to judge her for it. You liked the swagger and confidence that came with Emily knowing that every single time she came over, you'd cum harder than anybody else could make you.

"What does your roommate do again?" Emily asked as she followed you back to your bedroom. The apartment was always empty whenever you invited her over. She teased you sometimes about pushing your roommate away, but you were just fortunate to live with someone who was away on business trips so often.

"She works for a design company, and while I think you're very sweet for asking, do you really care?" You turned on your heels and shot Emily a skeptical look. The blonde seemed unbothered, just rubbing the back of her neck. You bit your lip as your eyes trailed along the length of her neck. In just a few short seconds, you'd be in your bedroom and able to kiss all over Emily's neck.

Emily was as close to a stone top as you had ever been with. It wasn't that Emily was uncomfortable being naked around you, far from it actually. Emily loved the way you'd appreciate her body, but she just preferred to spend her time focusing on your pleasure. Occasionally, Emily would joke with you whenever you started to pout about not getting to fuck her that she didn't want you to get better than her. In your mind, the notion that you could come close to Emily's skill level was laughable, but she was far too competitive for that to be just a joke.

"Hey now, don't get an attitude with me so early. I want us to have a good night babygirl," Emily warned. You looked up at her with your best puppy dog eyes and a slight pout. Emily stepped towards you and cupped your cheeks. You tried to move forward for a kiss, but she stopped you. "Are you going to behave for me?"

"On my best behavior, scout's honor," you promised. Emily let out a small chuckle as she leaned down to kiss you. You kept yourself reserved, even if you wanted to see how much Emily would let you deepen the kiss. You loved kissing Emily, to the point where the very thought of it distracted you constantly.

Emily's lips were always so soft, just barely sweetened from her chapstick. The slight vanilla taste blended well with the sweetness from her coffee creamer that always lingered on her tongue. That was nothing compared to how quickly she could make you weak in the knees with just a couple flicks of her tongue inside of your mouth.

"Goddamn you look good," Emily muttered under her breath as she pulled your shirt over your head. Her backpack laid next to your bed, close by for whenever Emily was ready for its contents. For now, you were content to stand in her arms as she let her hands roam shamelessly all over your body.

Eventually, her hands settled on your breasts. You ran a hand through her hair as she leaned down to kiss across your chest. Emily's fingers teased your nipples, pinching just hard enough to make you squirm in her arms. Emily knew exactly what she was doing to you, and she'd teasing you until she could literally see the wet spot in your underwear.

"Em, please," you whined and whimpered. It was little to no use, the woman not giving you anything more than a knee to grind against. You felt pathetic squeezing your thighs together as Emily put all of her attention and focus on your breasts. "Em, please, I'll do anything."

"Anything?" Emily briefly backed away to gauge your reaction. Your skin was flushed, chest covered in hickeys. Emily had scratch marks on her shoulders, but she didn't seem to pay it any mind. She knew that you'd claw at her back even worse whenever she fucked you with her strap. Emily knew to expect that she'd come out of your bedroom looking like she got in a fight with a feral cat.

"Anything," you confirmed. At this, Emily scooped you up and practically threw you onto the bed. Your head was hanging off of the edge, nearly level with Emily's crotch. She hadn't worn the strap over, never assuming that you wanted it even though you always did.

"Give me a minute babygirl, and I'll be all yours," Emily said. You tried your best to seem polite and patient as Emily undressed herself. She left herself almost completely bare, putting the strap on over her underwear. She started to make a move for her sports bra before she looked down at you. "Do you want this on or off me?"

"Off," you told her. Emily nodded as she pulled it over her head. The movement was smooth, and you bit your lip as Emily made her way closer to you. She cradled your face in her hands as she guided your mouth to the tip of her strap.

Emily slowly thrusted her hips in and out, watching carefully as you started to breathe through your nose. Your hands came up to grip at Emily's hips, pulling her in closer when you were ready for it. Emily watched you for only a few seconds before she leaned over and placed her hand against your cunt.

"Keep breathing, you're okay. You can handle this baby," Emily cooed. You thought sucking Emily off like this was pretty hot, but her touching you was distracting to say the least. Your breath stuttered a few times, but Emily was always quick to guide you through it. She could see you absolutely glistening as she pulled your underwear off, and without hesitation moved to eat you out instead.

You tried to move to keep her in your mouth, but Emily changed the angle so that the best you could do was bury your face against her hip. Your hands grabbed at her thighs, squeezing and digging your nails in as Emily's mouth worked you into a frenzy. There wasn't a single coherent thought in your head as your pleasure took over completely.

"Shh baby, you have neighbors," Emily teased. She didn't make it easy for you to keep quiet at all. Emily didn't even wait for you to come down from your first orgasm before she was sliding the length of her strap inside of you. You felt her bottom out, sliding in effortlessly and like she was made to fuck you and only you.

"Em, oh my god!" you exclaimed loudly. Emily didn't say anything else about you staying quiet as your moans were just barely muffled by her body. Your teeth sunk into her shoulder and the side of her neck as she pounded into you. Emily hissed occasionally as your nails cut into her skin, but the pain only made her thrust even harder.

You glanced at Emily's hand by your head on the mattress and pulled it up to wrap around your throat. Emily's eyes widened, but she squeezed at the sides, not completely unaware of you liking this. Emily could tell that you were close, her eyes intently watching your face as every expression that came across it showed your complete pleasure.

"Fuck, I swear I can feel it," Emily whispered in your ear. Your body kept a tight hold, making her thrusts a little more shallow. You clenched around the dildo, holding it in place as you came once again. Emily stayed inside of you as she let herself fall onto your body. You felt comfortable like that, even as your body started to realize how stretched thin it felt.

"One more," you told her. Emily looked a bit surprised by your words. She didn't argue against what you wanted, always more than happy to spend more time in bed with you. What did surprise her was the way that you pushed her onto your back. Emily bit her lip as you straddled her. You didn't immediately sink down onto her strap, instead letting it rub through your folds and against your clit. "I want you to fuck me like I'm your personal fleshlight."

"Jesus Christ," Emily groaned. You placed her hands on your hips and let her move you how she wanted you. Once Emily was inside of you again, you leaned down and pressed your face into her chest. Emily let you kiss and suck at her breasts as she started to move your hips up and down. Her own thrusts matched the movements of her arms, and you were being fucked absolutely breathless faster than you could comprehend.

"Harder," you gasped. Emily's face scrunched up a little with concentration as she tried to do what you asked. You kept begging for more and more until both you and Emily were absolutely spent. Your arousal coated her thighs from where you had dripped onto her. Emily glanced over at you as you laid on your stomach against the comforter, still trying to catch your breath.

"Fuck, after that I kind of want more," Emily said as she smacked your ass. She grabbed a handful as she sat up. You flipped your head to look at her, a slightly exasperated look on your face. "Don't worry, I was just thinking out loud. I know that you're done for tonight."

"Well, I could alway-," Emily put her hand up to cut you off.

"Not tonight, if I'm being honest, I've already cum," Emily admitted. She rubbed the back of her neck, always acting ashamed when she'd cum while fucking you as if you didn't think that was the hottest thing in the world. "Just relax for me, I gotta clean you up before I go."

"Stay, you know damn well I'm not letting you run off after that. You already said you're still horny, I can't have you finding another cute girl," you said. Emily let out a little puff of air as she got wipes out of her backpack. You could tell that she wanted to tell you that there were no other girls as she cleaned you up, but instead, she kept quiet. The fact that you always clung to her after made her feel good about herself, and she just wanted to find a way to make you feel that secure with her too.

[munsonsmixtapes]

Wanna Bet?

tattoo artist!Eddie x tattoo artist!reader

Summary: You don't like Eddie, but he's going to convince you that you do, even if it takes a bet to prove it.

This takes places in the year 2,000!

word count: 4k

This series is being discontinued until further notice, but feel free to continue reading if you'd like!

part two part three part four

You stared at the door in front of you, the hours that were painted onto it staring back at you. Maybe if you had stood there long enough, the place would’ve closed and you could just leave. You didn’t know why you were so nervous. You had more tattoos than anyone you knew so this one should’ve been a breeze. 

Maybe it was because it was a new place. There were new people you didn’t really know yet. The tattoo shop where you had worked had shut down because of a fire and you were still in shock because of it. So not only had you lost your job, but the appointment you had set up with Kip, the owner, had been canceled. He was the only one you trusted so you were hesitant when he had given you a referral. You didn’t care if it was a friend of his, you were still nervous as shit. 

Your hand rested on the door handle. You couldn’t get yourself to open it, bile climbing up your throat. You were terrified to say the least, anxiety coursing through you as you thought of every possible thing that could’ve gone wrong. 

You had your consultation with Gareth weeks ago and had called to reschedule because you had been scared, but now you were ready. It was just a small tattoo and Gareth had assured you that he’d go easy on you and you could take as many breaks as you wanted. You were looking forward to working with him despite your nervousness. 

You finally went inside and the whole place was very tidy despite the sketchy looking exterior. It definitely seemed like whoever owned the place knew exactly how to make people feel comfortable. There was a seating area by the front door with a large couch and a coffee table with a bunch of magazines spread out on it neatly. 

A coffee bar was sitting by the front desk, complete with a freshly brewed pot and an array of mugs that fit the aesthetic of the building. There were also different types of sweeteners and a small refrigerator that was filled with many different brands of bottled water as well as multiple different flavors of coffee creamer. 

The walls were covered in framed sketches and you wished you had the time to look at them all, fascinated by the details of each one. Rock music was playing loudly over the speakers and it was a song that you had recognized from the radio. 

You walked up to the reception desk and the same guy you had remembered from before was behind it typing away on the computer. He looked up at you and gave you a bright smile as if you were old friends. 

He was on the phone with who you assumed was a customer and it didn’t seem to be going well just from hearing his side of the conversation. 

“Yes, I am so sorry, Rebecca. Believe me, it won’t happen again. Yes, he knows all about it. Yes, I’ll tell him. You have my word. Alright. Buh-bye.” He hung up the phone and brought his attention to you, a bright smile on his face. 

“Hey, so sorry about that. Welcome in,” he greeted, his honey eyes shining bright from the sun shining through the window. “How can I help you?” 

“I have an appointment.” You gave him your first and last name and he typed some stuff into the computer before looking back up at you. You eyed him and couldn’t help but notice how out of place he looked there. He didn’t have a single tattoo on him and looked like he would’ve been scared to actually step foot into the building. 

“Alright, y/n,” his smile widened and you wondered if his cheeks ever hurt from doing that as often as he seemed to do. “If you’ll follow me, we can-“ His words were cut off by the front door opening. It was slammed shut so loudly that the frames on the wall rattled. Whoever had just entered had wanted to make an entrance and it clearly had worked since everyone had turned to see what all the commotion was about. Both you and the receptionist turned to see for yourselves to see the most beautiful man you had ever laid your eyes on. 

“I’m back, baby,” he announced, holding his arms out. Your eyes trailed down his body from his long curly hair to his black combat boots. He was so attractive and you wondered how you had never seen him before. You definitely would have remembered him if you had. The receptionist made a beeline for him as well as a few of the employees. It was clear that the man had been gone a while considering everyone’s reaction to him. He must have been pretty popular around there. 

“Steve, hug me, honey,” he pulled ‘Steve’ into his arms and pressed a kiss to his cheek only for Steve to rub it away in response. Despite his disgust, you could hear a little giggle fall from his mouth. Was this man God? He must have been because no one would react that way to a mediocre man, would they? At least, you hoped not. You hoped they all had higher standards than that. 

He took a drag of the cigarette he was holding and flashed you a smile before crossing the floor to the desk. The smoke passed through his lips and into the air and he titled his head down, his eyes locking onto yours. 

You knew his type just by looking at him. He was the life of the party. The kind of guy who thought that everyone was into him just because of his giant ego. And they were into him because of the way he carried himself. Like he didn’t give a damn about anything. And he didn’t. Not even the people who he claimed to be friends with. 

You could see him eyeing you when he stepped behind the desk, going through the envelopes that had been sitting on top of it. When most men checked you out, you’d pull your shirt down to show them a little cleavage, but for this guy, you just wrapped your cardigan around yourself, wanting to hide your body. He didn’t seem amused but wasn’t backing off. 

It was as if seeing the man had brought your confidence back. Like you were no longer the shy woman you had been just moments ago. Being around men who were full of themselves tended to do that to you. It was as if you felt the need to one up them, having more confidence than they did. You wanted to show that you had superiority. 

You turned your back to him, looking at the frames on the wall as you waited for your appointment to get straightened away. You didn’t have anywhere to be until you had to work later that night so you supposed that you could’ve waited just a bit longer. 

Your eyes locked onto one in particular. It was a sunflower and you normally wouldn’t have noticed it if it hadn’t stood out amongst all the other images that were far more dark subject matter. It was pretty and so realistic, like you could have reached out and plucked it from the painting. 

“Who’s the babe?” Eddie leaned over to Steve, whispering so he was the only one who could hear him. They both looked at you and you just avoided them, still looking at the frames. 

“She’s a client,” Steve replied, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. He loved the guy, but sometimes he couldn’t help but think that Eddie was nothing but a pig. “Jesus, Eddie. You just got back home and already can’t keep your dick in your pants?” 

“I’m human,” Eddie smirked, his eyes moving down to your ass, admiring the shape of it before turning back to Steve. “Sue me. I mean, look at her man,” he referred to you with his hand. “Look at that ass.” He leaned closer to Steve, pulling his lip between his teeth as he turned back to you to get another glimpse. 

“Did you miss the word ‘client’ coming out of my mouth? I’m serious, Ed, you can’t keep sleeping with them. It not only makes you look bad, it also makes the company look bad.” 

The shop had gotten multiple phone calls that Steve had the unfortunate pleasure of being on the receiving end of because that had been the phone number he has given the people he had slept with because he hadn’t deemed them important enough to give them his home number. 

Not only that, but Steve had walked in on too many of Eddie’s “meetings” in his office and was sick of the guy making a habit of it. Could he have not slept with them in his car or at his house like a normal person? 

He was getting tired of the new persona Eddie had taken on as he had gotten more popular. It was fine when he had gotten the motorcycle and when he flirted a little with the clients to make them more comfortable, but he drew the line at him acting like the complete dickhead he had become, using people for their bodies just to throw them away when he was done. 

“I just want to-“

“You want to what?” Steve cut him off “Seduce her?”

“Maybe,” Eddie rounded the desk. “We’ll see where it goes.” Steve grabbed onto the back of his jacket and pulled him back, causing Eddie to let out a yelp. 

“Not so fast,” Steve shook his head. 

“I just want to say hi,” Eddie held his hands up in defense even though the both of them knew that he was lying. 

“Saying ‘hi’ leads to flirting which leads to seducing which leads to ‘your place or mine’ which leads to you saying you’ll call and then you never do. I’ve been keeping a tally of all the people who have called here because you were an ass.” Steve held up the notebook he had been writing it and Eddie’s eyes widened. 

“Five, ten, fifteen, twenty-“ Eddie counted of the tallies to himself, not even trying to hold back his smile.  

“Forty-five, Eddie,” Steve cut him off with a glare. 

“Forty-five,” Eddie repeated, a smirk kicking up at the corner of his rosy lips. 

“And this is just with clients,” he sighed, throwing the book down “Look, you can fuck whoever you want as long as they’re not seeking business from us.” 

“Steve-“

“No,” he pointed at his friend with the pencil he was holding. “If I find out that you did anything but greet her as the owner, I swear to god I will castrate you.” Eddie’s eyes widened at Steve’s threat but only for a second before his smirk took over again. 

“But what if-“

“No, this isn’t a challenge. I mean it, if you even so much as bat your eyelashes at her, I’m going to make sure that you can never use your dick again.”

“Are you coming on to me?” Eddie batted his eyelashes. That had only happened once and they both just decided that they were better off as friends. “Damn, Stevie. I didn’t know you felt that way about me.” Steve had felt that way about Eddie once upon a time, but not anymore. Especially not since Eddie started solely thinking with his dick. 

“You’re disgusting,” Steve glared before turning back to the computer. “Now leave me alone.” 

“Happy to.” Eddie rounded the desk and made a beeline to you. He had no intention of keeping Steve’s promise and seeing the look you gave him only made him want to flirt with you even more. He had to do what he could to get the sour look off of your face. 

Unbeknownst to Eddie, you had heard his entire conversation with Steve, neither of them quite knowing what an “inside voice” was. It didn’t surprise you that Eddie would fuck anyone who was human, and it especially didn’t surprise you that most of them were clients. If you hadn’t already gone through the consultation, you would have walked right out of there. 

Fat chance if he thought he was going to get with you, but you were going to have some fun with him first. You were going to knock him down a few pegs. It was what he deserved for having whoever he wanted just because he was famous in the tattoo industry. 

“Hi,” he propped himself against the wall and you had to hold back a laugh at his flirting attempt. How could that have worked on anyone? 

“Hi,” you nodded towards him then turned back to face the frames. 

“I’m Eddie,” he put his hand out to shake and you reluctantly took it, not wanting to be rude to owner of the establishment no matter how much you wanted to tell him to fuck off. 

“Y/n,” you replied and his smile got wider. You had to admit that it was really nice. You could see at least how that worked for him. 

“Y/n,” he nodded, saying it slowly, focusing on each syllable as they fell from his lips. “That’s pretty.”

“Thanks.”

“You know, I don’t think I’ve seen you around here. And trust me, I’d remember someone as smokin’ as you.” That didn’t actually work on people, did it? That didn’t actually get him into people’s pants. 

“If anyone’s smokin’ here, it’s you,” you winked and wondered how you could have submitted your name to the Academy to be nominated for an Oscar for your performance. 

“So what brings you here, darlin’?” He crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head to the side like a curious puppy. He almost looked  adorable. Almost. 

“I have an appointment with Gareth.” Of fucking course. Eddie took a vacation and now Gareth was getting all the pretty girls. Sometimes, life just wasn’t fair. 

“Oh,” he nodded. “I can take you to him.” 

“Okay, Edwin.” You walked ahead of him to head to wherever Gareth could have possibly been and Eddie took another opportunity to stare at your ass. The way your jeans clung to it. The way it moved when you walked. He needed to feel it, skin against skin. He just knew that it would have been soft. He desperately wanted to give it a little slap, but even he knew that wouldn’t have been appropriate. Even for him 

“It’s Eddie,” he corrected and you didn’t bother to look back at him when you spoke. 

“Sure, Eduardo.” He wasn’t used to women acting this way and he’d have been lying if he said he didn’t like it. He actually thought it was kind of hot. 

He was right behind you when you stopped abruptly at Gareth’s station. Eddie had been so busy staring that ran right into you and had to grab onto your shoulders to stop the both of you from falling to the floor. 

He let out a chuckle but you just ignored him, keeping your attention on Gareth. His face lit up when he saw you and he couldn’t help but smile as well. You hadn’t forgotten your flirty consultation and the way he looked at you from across the desk. Like he had wanted to take you right there and you would have let him. 

You had imagined running your hands through his curly hair, pressing your lips to his roughly, sticking your tongue into his mouth. Hearing his moans when you touched him in just the right spots. 

Eddie looked between the two of you and he didn’t like what he saw. The way you were smiling at each other, the flirty glint in your eyes. Whatever was going on had to be nipped right in the bud. If he couldn’t have you, no could. Not even Gareth. Especially not Gareth. 

“Hey, cutie,” you greeted, resting your hands on his table and Gareth just blushed. He wasn’t used to getting attention from people, at least not romantically. And when you had showed up and openly flirted with him, he could have sworn it was a joke. But seeing you then, he realized that you hadn’t been joking at all. 

“Hey,” he responded, a small smile forming on his lips. “How are you?”

“I’m great. And you?”

“I’m fantastic. Especially now that you’re here.” You giggled at his words, causing his blush to get pinker. Eddie watched the two of you for a bit longer then looked around the room for a trash can he could throw up in. 

“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.” You leaned closer and Eddie quickly turned away. No way in hell he was subjecting himself to seeing the two of you kiss. 

“Well, I’m ready when you are,” Gareth smiled and sat down in his chair, rolling it closer to the bench. 

“I’m ready now,” you nodded, sitting on the bench and Eddie took that as a sign to actually do his tasks that he had been putting off for far too long. 

———

“Gareth,” you gasped as you looked at your fresh ink in the mirror. It was a Sting from Lord of the rings and it was exactly what you wanted. He was somehow able to get it exactly how you imagined it. “This is fucking amazing.” 

“Really? You like it?” He had a sheepish smile on his face that you could see perfectly in the reflection. He was just so cute. And sweet. The complete opposite of the other guys you had been with. The complete opposite of Eddie. 

“I love it.” You turned around to face him and before you could stop yourself, you were throwing yourself into his arms. They were quick to wrap around your waist tightly. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he smiled, making no move to let go of you. “I’m glad it was what you wanted.” 

“It’s perfect. Really.” Gareth had never gotten that kind of reaction from one of his clients. They usually just thanked him and paid before leaving. 

“I’m sorry,” you apologized, pulling away from him. “That was totally inappropriate.” 

“No,” he assured you. “It’s okay. I…liked it.” 

“Well, good.”

“C‘mon,” he nodded his head towards the front of the shop. “Let’s get your care instructions.”

You followed him to the front desk where Steve was still typing away on the computer. Eddie was beside him, going through some envelopes. He looked up at you and Gareth and didn’t miss your close proximity, your shoulders touching. He supposed that if you ended up with anyone, it should have been Gareth. He would have treated you right and wouldn’t have just wanted to fuck you like Eddie did. 

Eddie didn’t do relationships. He just liked to get laid and have no other connection to the people. That was the only way he could do it. Thinking about being romantic with someone made him feel gross. It made him want to laugh. He only had enough love in his life for his few friends and Wayne. 

You didn’t do relationships either, but you felt like if you played your cards right, you’d be able to start something with Gareth. He was sweet and he liked you and you didn’t get that weird feeling in your gut when you were around him. That feeling that always told you that the person was bad news. And it was always right. Maybe Gareth would end up being the right guy for you. Or maybe he wouldn’t, but you were willing to find out. 

“Well, let me see!” Steve exclaimed and you turned around, stepping closer to the desk. He leaned over it to get a better look, a wide smile spreading over his face. “That’s sick…what is it?”

“C’mon, Steve. It’s from Lord of the Rings,” Eddie replied. 

“That’s what it’s from?” Gareth asked, turning to you. “I thought it was just a dagger.”

“It’s Sting. It was an Elven short-sword made in Gondolin during the First Age,” you told them. 

“Bilbo discovered it in the year TA2941 in a Troll-hoard, and used it during the Quest of Erebor,” Eddie finished, a smirk forming on his lips. He had met many women who like Lord of the Rings and had even done a few tattoos, but he liked the fact that you were so passionate about it. 

“God, you guys are such fucking nerds,” Steve scoffed. “How do you know that from memory?”

“How do you not?” You and Eddie asked in unison, causing you both to laugh. 

“Alright,” Steve turned to you. “Your total is going to be-“

“Actually, it’s on the house, right Stevie?” Gareth asked and Steve just let out a sigh. 

“Sure, I uh, I guess it’s on the house.” With how many times Eddie had done the same thing, the company had surely lost a lot of money, but Steve supposed he could make an exception. Gareth had been shot down so many times that Steve thought he at least deserved to let one girl get her tattoo for free. 

“Oh, you don’t have to,” you shook your head vigorously. You always wanted to make sure that people were getting paid properly for their work. Especially tattoo artists because that kind of thing took a lot of time and patience. “I think Gareth should be compensated for his hard work.” 

“I can be compensated in other ways,” Gareth winked at you and Eddie feigned throwing up while Steve smiled. He was just happy that the guy was finally getting some attention. He always seemed to fade into the background when Eddie was around. People always seemed to care about him and Steve felt bad for Gareth. That he was always stuck in his best friend’s shadow. He hated it for him. 

“Sounds like a plan,” you winked back. “Maybe I could repay you tonight.” Gareth liked that idea. He liked that idea a lot.

“I think I’m gonna be sick,” Eddie put his hand over his mouth and disappeared behind the door that was behind him. 

“I’d like that,” Gareth nodded, stepping towards you, the two of you completely ignoring Eddie. He was just jealous that he wasn’t on the receiving end of the flirting this time. He was always a sore loser even though he frequently tried to deny it. He loved Gareth. Like a brother, even. But he couldn’t help but feel jealous that the guy was getting your attention. He didn’t know why, but the fact that you didn’t seem to be interested in him only made him want to try harder. He wanted to prove himself that he could get you into bed. 

You grabbed a blank piece of paper and pen from the desk and scribbled down your phone number and address before handing it to him. He took it from you and quickly took his cell phone out of his pocket, quickly typing in the numbers and saving it under a cutesy nickname. 

“So you’ll come over after you get done here?”

“I definitely will,” he nodded.

“Great,” you smiled and Gareth could have sworn that he was feeling his knees giving out. You then leaned closer to him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll see you tonight, Emerson.”

After you were all set, you pulled Gareth into a lingering hug then exited the shop, the man watching you through the glass as you headed down the street. He had only had a few conversations with you and was already down bad. Why did he have to always fall so easily? He knew that you’d drop him for Eddie with one bat of his lashes so he didn’t even know why he was trying. 

Maybe he was wrong. Maybe you really did like him. Maybe this wasn’t all just an elaborate plan for you to get to Eddie like he had thought. He couldn’t even keep track of how many times that had happened to him and he was sick of it. What was wrong with him? Cleary something since he was never anyone’s first choice. But for once, he was yours. He was your first choice and he couldn’t have been more elated about it. 

You got to your car and was shocked to find Eddie leaning against it. He was smoking a cigarette and you hated how you kind of found it hot. But only kind of. He was leaning against the driver’s seat door, preventing you from getting in it and he looked like he had no intention of leaving any time soon. He gave you his signature smile and you smiled back, not wanting to show just how much he was getting to you. 

“So,” he spoke, blowing the smoke from his mouth and it wafted right into your face, causing you to cough. “You and Emerson, huh?” He used his cigarette to point to the building. 

“Yes,” you nodded, waving the smoke away from your face. “But I don’t see how that’s any of your business.” You crossed your arms over your chest, wondering why he cared so much. He could have anyone he wanted from what you had heard so you weren’t sure why he was so set on hitting on an almost taken woman.

“It’s my business because Gareth is my best friend and I’ll be damned if anyone hurts him.” He pushed off of the car and stood directly in front of you, attempting to look intimidating, but fell flat. You weren’t scared of anything, especially not Eddie Munson. 

Eddie really didn’t care who Gareth spent his time with, especially not romantically, but you weren’t one of the soft, innocent looking girls that the guy usually went for. Eddie just wanted to make sure that you were good for him. And maybe the way of seeing whether or not that was true was sleeping with you, but that was going to take a lot more effort than usual. But Eddie always liked a challenge. 

Usually, showing a woman just what she was missing after the initial shut down wasn’t a problem. He turned on the charm and was as nice as possible until he got what he wanted. He didn’t know why you wouldn’t just give in. He was sure that he could make you feel much more than Gareth ever could and he’d do it so much better. Gareth was less experienced than him and was seriously lacking in flirting skills so stealing you away would have been a breeze. It wouldn’t be long before you were racing into his arms, telling him that you had been wrong all along. And he couldn’t wait. 

“If anyone’s hurting Gareth, it’s you,” you crossed your arms over your chest. Those words stung Eddie more than they should have, but he wasn’t going to show it. “You just can’t stand the fact that someone prefers him over you. Gareth is sweet and caring and guess what? He’s also much more of a man than you will ever be. So fuck off and go find someone else to screw with because it sure as hell won’t be me.” You pushed him out of the way and got into your car before pulling out of your parking space and heading down the road. 

Eddie watched in shock as you drove away. No one had even spoken to him like that and he’d have been lying if he said that if didn’t make his dick hard. What was wrong with him? He hadn’t always been a pig. Once upon a time, he was actually a nice guy, but then he got just a sliver of fame in the tattoo industry and thought he could treat everyone any way he wanted. He had quickly become the kind of guy that he had usually despised and didn’t even care that his friends were getting tired of him. 

It was like an addiction. He had slept with one person and then another and then another and it was like he couldn’t stop. Now he couldn’t go a couple weeks without having someone between his sheets. It was getting to the point that he didn’t even really enjoy it, but he was so desperate for attention that he’d take home anyone that he could just so he wouldn’t have to sleep by himself and be alone with his thoughts. 

Eddie hung his head and reluctantly headed back inside. Gareth was still at the front desk and Eddie gave him a glare before heading to his office for some much needed alone time. He couldn’t let Gareth know that he had gotten to him. That would have just been embarrassing. Eddie thought that he was better than him in every way and didn’t like that he had gotten the girl for once. He had lost and hated the way the rejection felt. It was like a stab to the heart and he finally knew how his best friend had felt watching him leave with all of those different people. It was torture, but that still didn’t mean that he was just going to let him have you. He still had a point to prove, no matter what it took.

[samwisethewitch]

Bewitching Your Coffee

I am 100% a coffee drinker. I love drinking it black, I love it in lattes and cappucini (yes, that's the actual plural of cappucino), and I especially love the experience of sharing coffee with another person. And, like everything that comes out of my kitchen, I like finding ways to make coffee more magical.

But even though coffee is a daily essential for a lot of us and has a long history in folk magic, people don't talk about it nearly as much as tea magic. I did some digging, and this post contains my research into the magic and lore of coffee and the things we like to add to coffee. I hope my fellow kitchen witches find this helpful!

Correspondences of Coffee and Common Coffee Add-ons

Coffee: Used for grounding and to anchor a spell in the physical world. Useful in spells for mental clarity and enhancing psychic senses. Used in several types of American folk magic as an offering for spirits. Author Starr Casas uses coffee for powerful cleansing and blockbusting in her Southern folk magic practice. Because of its association with energy and movement, coffee can be used to add strength to spells. I personally associate coffee with the Earth and Air elements and with the planet Uranus.

Milk has different correspondences based on whether you are using cow's milk or a plant-based milk.

Cow's Milk: Associated with nurturing, love, and abundance. In pagan Ireland, offering someone milk was an effective blessing. Milk and cream are said to be favorite offerings of fairies. I associate cow's milk with the Water element and the Moon.

Soy Milk: Soy may have been a sacred food crop in ancient China and is associated with blessings. During the Japanese festival Setsubun, soy beans are used to repel bad spirits and draw good fortune in a practice called mamemaki -- soy products can be used in spells for protection or good fortune. Use soy milk or other soy products in spells for success, good luck, and prosperity. I personally associate soy milk with the Earth element and with the planet Jupiter.

Almond Milk: Associated with prosperity, wealth, and success in business, as well as with increasing wisdom. Almond milk and other almond products are associated with the Air element and the planet Mercury.

Coconut Milk: Associated with purification, healing, and protection. In African American magic traditions, coconut can be used for peaceful home work and protection work, as well as ancestor offerings. Coconut is associated with the Water element and the moon.

Oatmilk: Associated with prosperity and money magic. Oats are associated with the Earth element and the planet Venus.

Sweeteners attract sweetness and good fortune. Different sweeteners have their own associations.

Sugar: Associated with love and lust. In Southern folk magic, sugar is sometimes used in money work. Sugar is associated with the Water element and the planet Venus.

Brown Sugar: Has the same associations as regular sugar, but works more slowly because it contains molasses.

Honey: Associated with home, family, love, and blessings. In Southern folk magic, honey is sometimes used in domination or control work, especially honeycomb. I personally associate honey with the Water element and with the planet Venus.

Maple Syrup: Associated with love, money, and long life. I personally associate maple with new life and transformation based on Robin Wall Kimmerer's writings about them in Braiding Sweetgrass. Associated with the Air element and the planet Jupiter.

Artificial Sweeteners (Splenda, xylitol, and other man-made sweeteners): There's very little written about the magical uses of these sweeteners, but I personally associate them with creativity, innovation, and new discoveries. I associate these sweeteners with the Air element and the planets Mercury and Uranus.

Caramel* is actually made from sugar, which is cooked over low heat until it caramelizes, or turns brown. Caramel has the same magical associations as sugar, but with a stronger connection to Fire energy and to transformation.

*Note: In the US, "caramel" is often made with corn syrup. For example, the caramel drizzle at Starbucks is basically 100% corn syrup, or at least was when I worked there a few years back. This isn't to say you can't work magically with corn syrup-based caramel, but the energy will be different. I don't have experience here because I have a corn allergy, so I'd love to hear if anyone has experience working with corn syrup in witchcraft!

Chocolate** is originally from Latin America and was an important ceremonial drink in Mayan culture. In Mexica (Aztec) culture, chocolate was used as currency and was said to be a gift from the gods. It was associated with the devil and with witchcraft when it was first brought to Spain by colonizers. Later, during the Renaissance, it was seen as a miracle cure for all kinds of medical conditions. Based on its history, chocolate can be used in magic for love, sex, energy, spirituality, magical abilities, and healing. I personally associate chocolate with the Fire element and with the Sun.

**Note: Scott Cunningham includes a note on "chocolate" in his book on magical herbs, but this is actually carob, Jacaranda procera. The cacao tree, which produces chocolate, is Theobroma cacao.

Cinnamon is associated with success, healing, adding power to spells, spirituality, wealth, and protection. Cinnamon is important in Christian folk magic because of its use in the Bible. In Southern folk magic, cinnamon is used for money, luck, and lust and is said to work very fast. It can also be used for blessings and protection spells. It is associated with the Fire element and the Sun.

Clove is probably most famous for its use in spells to stop gossip, but it is also used to drive away harmful spirits and to attract wealth. It is also sometimes used in love and sex magic and for successful business work. It is connected to the Fire element and the planet Jupiter.

Ginger adds power to spells and situations. It is used in spells for love, money, success, and healing, but it can be included in any spell to add power or make results happen faster. Ginger is associated with Fire and with the planet Mars.

Hazelnuts have long been used in Western European folk charms for luck and good fortune. It is said that eating hazelnuts makes you wise and can increase fertility. Hazel is also associated with protection and with granting wishes. It is connected to the Air element and the Sun.

Lavender is used in love spells, especially spells to attract a masculine partner. It also has a strong association with peacefulness and with calming emotions. It is sometimes used for protection and is said to both attract and banish spirits, depending on the source. Lavender has a long historic connection to the queer community. It is associated with Air and the planet Mercury.

Nutmeg is most famous as a good luck charm, but it is also used for healing, money, and success. In Southern folk magic, it is used mostly for money, success, and good luck. It is associated with Fire and with Jupiter.

Peppermint is commonly used in healing magic, but it can also be used for purification, attracting good spirits, divination, love, and money. In Southern folk magic, peppermint is used for hex breaking. It is associated with Fire and the planet Mercury.

Vanilla is strongly associated with love and comfort. It can sometimes be used in lust spells. Scott Cunningham mentions using vanilla to replenish lost energy. It is associated with the Water element and the planet Venus.

Magical Coffee Brews

With these ingredient correspondences, you can easily mix a spell into a coffee drink. For example, a pumpkin spice latte (which is made with pumpkin pie spice, i.e., a mix of cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and cloves) can be a spell for money and success. A lavender latte with oatmilk could be an excellent love spell, especially for queer love. A peppermint mocha (coffee with chocolate) could be a healing spell. There are lots of possibilities for a magic brew!

Sources:

Witchcraft for Everyone by Sam Wise

Cunningham's Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs by Scott Cunningham

Hoodoo Herbal by Starr Casas

Jambalaya by Luisah Teish

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer

Wikipedia article for soybeans

Wikipedia article for Setsubun

"History of Chocolate" on History.com

"Chocolate: From witchcraft to miracle worker in early modern Europe" by Erin Alice Cowling, published in The Conversation

[theminecraftbee]

Skizz slams the door open. "Am I late? Guys, am I late?"

"Relax, relax," says Impulse. "Grian still hasn't actually started yet, so like -"

"Oh, thank goodness. I wanted to put six diamonds down on 'soulenemies'," Skizz says, slumping into a couch in the corner of a coffee shop he definitely, definitely isn't supposed to have been able to get into. It's just, like, if Grian gets to open a ridiculous rift in reality, there's nothing stopping the rest of them, right?

"Okay!" Scar says, brightly. "That's long-shot odds you know. 'We don't get to know how many lives we have' currently has the most diamonds on it, you know."

"Yeah, Grian's not that boring," Skizz says, as Scar marks it down on the chart. To the side, Martyn snorts. "If he were gonna do that, he'd do some other twist too."

"I wanted to bet for reverse life but Impulse wouldn't let me," Pearl says.

"Pearl, I'm not letting you waste your diamonds on 'the guy who dies the most wins'."

"Jimmy deserves the win!" Pearl says.

"Yeah, that's why Grian wouldn't do it."

Martyn snorts and takes a sip of a drink. Skizz squints. He's... pretty sure that's actually just milk. He's not sure why Martyn is drinking it like it's wine or something, but like, sure.

"I still say 'we're doing it underwater' this time," Martyn adds.

"Can you do that? Tango, you're technically an admin, right?" Impulse asks.

"Uhhhhh.... I don't know," Tango says, shrugging. "I think we'd drown."

"Underwater, but we don't drown. We can test it," Martyn says. "The pool is mine."

"Long odds," Scar says.

"Listen. If you all insist on using MY COFFEE SHOP for these - these illegal activities," Bdubs starts.

"Awww, Bubbles," Etho says.

"Y - You don't get to try to sweeten me up!" Bdubs says. "If you're using my coffee shop, you'll keep it down, so -"

Cleo comes barreling down from outside. "Grian's in the shopping district," she says, deceptively calm.

"SCATTER!" Impulse says, not calm at all.

Scar flips the betting board over. Someone jumps out a window. Before Skizz can figure out what to do, he and Martyn are shoved under a table on top of each other.

"Take me out to dinner first," Martyn says.

"Come on man," Skizz says, and then the door opens.

There's a long silence. Then, Skizz hears Grian speak.

"You know, I'm not an idiot. I know when you're hiding stuff from me. I'm going to get to the bottom of this. Whatever prank you're planning? I will have both eyes open. Doc's been throwing creepers at me! I'm ready!"

Another silence.

"Yeah, okay, sure," Bdubs says.

"Why did you say that so suspiciously," Grian says.

"Oh, yeah, actually, Grian, what's your opinion on elytras?"

"...Bdubs, you've been on the same server as me for how many years?" Grian says, baffled.

"Just wondering! Have, uh, have..."

"You know what? I'm not asking," Grian says, and it's silent for a bit before there's a shuffling and Skizz is pulled out from under the table.

"Sorry about that, precautions, you know? It's not fair if he sees what we're betting on, then he won't do it," Scar says. "Anyway. You know, Bdubs, your theory that we're doing it this time with wings? Good theory, good theory! I see potential in that. It is easy to forget how much that man likes his wings. Looking far more promising! Any takers?"

"That would be the worst to fight with and I don't think he'd do it," Cleo says, and the conversation begins again.

[writingquestionsanswered]

how can i make a fake framed traitor out of an extremely kind, virtuous and genuine character that the main character trusts wholeheartedly? what could i use to make the MC and reader be like ‘yes this is unlikely but unfortunately makes sense’ just to make a reveal later?

Making a Framed Traitor Seem Genuine

There are three things you can do to make a framed traitor seem like they're genuinely a traitor...

1 - Make the Motive Make Sense - Any traitorous act must have an underlying motive... the reason that anyone would commit the traitorous act to begin with. So the key is to find a way to make that motive make sense for that character, no matter how random it may seem. Like, maybe a side benefit to committing the traitorous act is a cash windfall, and maybe the framed character also happened to recently mentioned being in need of cash for some legitimate reason. It may not mean they're guilty, but the motive fits.

2 - Sweeten the Pot with a Little Plausible Deniability - Try to think of some additional coincidental thing that will make them look even more guilty, but which also gives them some plausible deniability. Like, maybe one of the orchestrators of this traitorous act also happens to own a popular night club in town. And maybe the framed character is known to never go to night clubs, ever, but maybe one night they were peer pressured into attending a barely known co-worker's bachelorette party, and during that party they got separated from the group and had to wander into several different nightclubs trying to find the group again. And maybe they happened to wander into the bad person's nightclub without even knowing it, and were spotted going into said nightclub by one of the about-to-be-betrayed friends, which obviously looks very bad for the framed person. Because now, in addition to having a reasonable motive for the betrayal they are accused of, they've also been seen in a place that suggests an association with one of the other perpetrators. And although they have the plausible deniability ("I didn't go there because I wanted to... I was looking for the group I was with...) there's no way they can prove that's true.

3 - Drop a Few Other Subtle Hints - That may be enough to make your character look guilty when they're not, but if you need to, you could drop in one or a few other hints earlier on in the story that accomplish the same thing on a more subtle level. Something that will look bad in retrospect but hardly be noticeable at the time. Like, maybe one of the soon-to-be-betrayed friends invites them to their slam poetry reading, and the framed person texts at the last minute that they can't come because they have to work late (which is actually true), and then later the group will learn that Team Bad did some big thing that night. At the time it seems like nothing, but in retrospect--thinking that framed-character was involved in the traitorous act, now it makes sense that they missed the slam poetry night because... of course! They were actually with Team Bad doing the bad thing they did that night. Again, this wouldn't occur to the characters or reader at the time, but when connecting the dots in retrospect, it all adds up. Of course, the reality is it was just a coincidence and they really were at work that night.

Just be careful not to go too far in making them look really guilty. You don't want to weight them down with so many coincidences that look bad that they always look a little guilty, even once absolved.

Happy writing!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[compact-turtle]

!!! Hi! I love all of your OCs, I just wanted to ask if you have any plans for Ivar part two? I *need* to know what happens! Also! How would the Ivar react if his darling found out he was the one who killed that other patient, and was horrified? Because even though they were awful, I feel like the darling wouldn't want them to be killed out right (and they might blame themselves for getting him killed?)

There are plans for Ivar Part 2 in the works! It'll probably come out after I finish all the 1k follower works. maybe in a couple weeks then? ------

-Regardless, of how he treated them, Darling would never want the other patient to be murdered! Even if the guy was complete scum, he still deserved to not have his life taken away.

-They'd feel an awful immense guilt if they ever found out that they were the cause for the death. They'd probably blame themselves for even feeling relief that they died in the moment.

-However Ivar is a D1 gas lighter and plays the long game. He knows to keep his cool and not make rash choices (usually). There was never any actual proof so how would anyone know he did it anyways....? It's just speculation that perhaps there may have been foul play. He'd also talk around Darling's extreme feelings of guilt and probably never admit to actually causing the death of the other patient.

"It's awful what happened to him but imagine if he actually did do some of those things he talked about? He wasn't afraid to talk to you like that at all. Imagine if he decided to go through with it." "Ivar, I mean.." "Also, what if he decided to focus on someone else who was less fortunate than you? You know, I'd always protect you and my boys would keep an eye out for you. But some other person might not be as lucky. Maybe it's for the best that he passed away peacefully in his sleep. "

-Ivar would also rely on his status as a selfless war hero who was tragically injured. Everyone in town loves him and feels immensely awed at his bravery. How could someone like Ivar do anything wrong?

-Also, Ivar would really want to make you feel guilty for even thinking he's capable of such a heinous act. He'd avoid you, not clean your house, or anything of the sort. Absolutely go no contact with you. No matter how much it pains him :(

-Don't worry though! He's always got to make sure you're safe so he'd watch you through the cameras he planted in the house.

-However, he'd make sure to show up at the hospital and sweeten up your co workers when you're not there. He'd buy them coffee and subtly hint at his interest in you.

-Eventually, everyone would start to press you to apologize to him and you'd probably begin to doubt yourself. Maybe Ivar isn't such a bad guy and you were just overreaction? I mean, nobody was there to see anything happen to the other patient anyways...

[chlorine-and-daisies]

did the metatron only chose aziraphale as supreme archangel because of his connection to crowley?

in this essay i will make the case that metatron is inadvertently sowing the seeds of his own destruction!

i. metatron does not respect aziraphale

metatron looks down on other angels in general, sending the supreme archangels back to heaven like naughty children and calling muriel dim.

he treats aziraphale's bookshop as unimportant, passing it on to muriel last-minute without asking aziraphale who he would want as the successor (perhaps because aziraphale would have chosen crowley.)

he has some previous beef with crowley, as i'll get into later, so the way that he says casually that he knows aziraphale worked with crowley a few times is extremely disingenuous.

he says that as supreme archangel, aziraphale could restore crowley to angelic status.

notice two things.

a. metatron doesn't say "you can bring crowley" or "you should bring crowley" or "you and crowley can be together." he doesn't care about their relationship at all. a life with crowley is a perk of the job. just a way to sweeten the deal.

b. metatron specifically brings up angelic status. aziraphale is currently torn- he loves crowley and thinks crowley is good, but he also thinks only angels can be good. either crowley is meant to be an angel, or crowley is actually evil. and if crowley is actually evil not only does aziraphale have poor taste in men, but he is himself deserving to Fall by association. metatron is telling him clear as day- it's the former. you're okay, you're both okay, as long as you follow me and my rules. obviously this is still fucked up but to aziraphale a higher power has forgiven both him and the love of his life. this gives aziraphale so much relief, you can still see him bouncing and smiling on his way back into the bookshop to talk to crowley.

the offer is such targeted manipulation.

sorry to say this, but aziraphale- if the metatron hates your peers and your livelihood and your husband, he looks down on you as well, no matter how special he says you are.

think back to the oat milk latte. metatron puts aziraphale at ease by saying that he also eats/drinks (something that gabriel made fun of aziraphale for, something aziraphale associates with nina and crowley) but do we ever see metatron buying anything to eat or drink himself? they sit together talking and there is only one coffee at the table. between them.

it's all lies.

aziraphale was played like a fiddle while not even being the target that mattered, and it breaks my heart.

ii. aziraphale is not qualified for the job (at least not in the way you would expect)

the main thing aziraphale has that other angels don't is an appreciation for humanity. that is incredibly important but it is also a blind spot in heaven, because most of them treat humans like slightly more interesting ants. would the metatron, who wants to destroy all of humanity, think that aziraphale is a qualified leader because aziraphale is sympathetic to humans?

more generally, from heaven's perspective as of s2e6, what has aziraphale done to set him apart as a leader of angels? why is aziraphale the ideal choice to lead the second coming, when he spends all of his time reading books and eating sushi? when he's only a principality with no social capital whatsoever, and no way to defend himself as he doesn't have the flaming sword and his store is no longer a official heaven embassy?

the only time when he appeared to be a vaguely gifted angel was when he "survived hellfire" and i doubt that he would be appointed over that.

you love him, i love him, but the archangels hate him and want him to be removed from the book of life! so he's not going to be voted in by popular vote either.

iii. metatron has been bitter towards crowley for 6000 years

first metatron generally acts pretty snotty to crowley and refers to him simply as "demon." he asks if he recognizes him, crowley immediately implies that he does but he doesn't speak about their past.

then metatron tells aziraphale that as supreme archangel he would have the power to bring crowley to heaven as an angel. as i talked about before the primary goal of this is to manipulate aziraphale.

he doesn't actually want crowley in heaven or expect him to accept the offfer. how do i know that? because the second aziraphale admits that crowley denied the offer, metatron goes back to badmouthing crowley, saying that he "asked damn fool questions" when he was in heaven.

why does metatron hate crowley so much? well we can only speculate, but s2 has been FILLED with hints that crowley is extremely powerful and was Actually A Really Big Deal when he was still in heaven. others have made posts going into this in more detail but these hints include muriel's "throne, dominion or above" line, crowley being shown creating the stars, controlling the weather, and stopping time. most fan money is on crowley being either raphael or lucifer, i mean this guy is larger than life, and might even have been the first prince of heaven to fall that was mentioned in gabriel's trial.

metatron would have good reason to fear that kind od power, and there's a personal aspect to his hatred too because they knew each other in heaven. in other words- crowley asks annoying questions and is annoyingly powerful.

iv. conclusion and implications

hopefully by now i've convinced you that metatron doesn't respect aziraphale, and that aziraphale isn't exactly the ideal candidate for the supreme archangel job, and that metatron shows bitterness towards crowley.

connecting the dots:

why would you hire someone for a job when you don't respect him, and none of the existing managers would ever pick him to do that job?

maybe because you think you can manipulate him, and because you want to get back at his more powerful husband who you happen to hate.

aziraphale is not the guy you pick because you believe he can do great things- he's the guy you pick because you think he will eat up your propaganda, because you think he's not competent or connected enough to interfere with your plans, AND bonus points picking him make your enemy sadder and weaker

but metatron underestimates aziraphale and crowley.

aziraphale gave away the flaming sword. his love for humanity and the world and his lower principality status actually make him a great candidate to stop the second coming. because compared to gabriel, he is more likely to speak to other angels from all parts of the hierarchy, show them how amazing earth can be, and call for nonviolence.

also, if the aim is to take aziraphale away to get back at crowley and break both of their spirits...you think crowley is just going to accept aziraphale being damseled? it's classic in human stories for someone to come to save their captured partner and get even more powerful than they were before in the process, but metatron isn't human! he doesn't realize ~the power of love~!!!

once crowley realizes that he couldn't have just stolen away with aziraphale while the world that they care about was threatened, and aziraphale realizes that he has been deeply manipulated and taking crowley to heaven would have been both soul-crushing and impossible, they'll learn that they were in a no-win situation, and neither of them was in the wrong for the Final Fifteen going so poorly.

and then.

they'll try to find each other again.

and metatron's days in power will be numbered.

[hotluncheddie]

... do you think that Steve would keep wearing his old clothes for as long as he could as he puts on weight, secretly enjoying the pinches of his waistband as it gets tighter, revelling in the little sharp reminders that he's getting bigger? 👀

i completely and utterly, totally so so so much think he would

i am obsessed with this anon, 👀 big time

this was going to be short but then while i love 'and they were roommates' it was also like, well, obviously, robin is there too...

and then i also had to include my actual baby girl steves blue henley

and then a safety pin to keep his jeans closed was just too good to pass up..

so, ya, have nearly 4k of belly and pining and confessions :3c

-

Every week, it takes Steve just a little bit longer to get dressed. 

He has to suck in a little more, feel his sides spill out of the waistband a little further and his belly is fighting harder and harder against the zipper of his jeans. Taking up more and more room. Until, one day, it's all going to burst. 

Steve cant wait. 

‘You’re really packing it on Harrington.’ He'll whisper to himself. Smoothing his hand down his shirt and feeling where his belly button is indented in the fabric. He’s started untucking them to try and hide how his jeans button is straining. But now his shirts are straining too. It won't be long until they can't contain him, letting a sliver of belly show no matter how much he pulls at them. 

Today he's wearing the blue henley that used to sit comfortably at his hips, a loose layer over a t-shirt. But, now it sits snug and taught, his wider shoulders filling it up, lower band snapped against the underside of his growing spare tire. Still just reaching his jeans though, thankfully, and covering how his white t-shirt does not - slipping up to his navel with the slightest of moments. 'Really let yourself go.' he mumbles, gut stirring with heat, twisting to look at his ass and belly from the side, liking they way they both jiggle just little now when he moves. 

Then he goes and makes breakfast. 

He's been on a cereal kick lately, keeps craving the sweet and sugary whole milk at the end of the bowl. He usually has some to go with his toast and eggs. 

He says good morning to Eddie, who just grunts at him, like normal, and reaches for the box on the top shelf. 

'...Steve.' Eddie says, slowly, coffee mustn't have kicked in yet. 

Steve is focused on pouring his cereal. What?' He asks. 

'Steve.' Comes Eddie again, clearer now. 

Eddie.' Steve finally looks over, Eddies eyes wide. 

Eddie gestures to his own midsection 'you, your.' He mumbles, circling the whole area, his lean stomach and hips.

'The shirt looks good on you Ed's I dunno what you want.’

Eddie coughs 'I can see your, like, everything.' 

Steve looks down at himself, his stretching had pulled the henley up, belly and sides keeping it up. 'Oh.'  He says, pale skin and dark hair on display. The stretch marks at his hips can be seen too, pooling over the waistband. His cheeks go as pink as those new lines. He really has packed it on. 

'Thanks man.' He says, trying to keep his voice level. He readjusts his shirt, pulls at his jeans that don't budge, shivers.

He has two bowls of cereal with his toast and eggs that morning. Eddie excusing himself quickly as Steve chugged the last of the sweetened milk. 

Leaving Steve alone to pat his stomach and settle the food there, dig the heel of his hand into his crotch and simmer over the mix of feeling he has for the whole situation. 

He'll deal with that properly later though, after work, he doesn't want to go through re-buttoning his jeans again just yet. 

-

A few weeks later Steve takes so long to get dressed he almost doesn't have time for breakfast. 

Or breakfast with Eddie as it's seemed to have become. Eddie always staying at the table even after he finishes his second cup of coffee, waiting and watching as Steve makes and eats his meal. Sometimes pushing to near fullness if there's time, sometimes still bloated and sluggish from the night before. (He sneaks snacks home sometimes, to have after dinner, after everyone is in bed. Extra to pack on top of whatever he had that day, help him reach a fullness that makes sparks burst behind his eyes when he finally lets himself touch, lets himself sink and feel and finish all over his swollen gut.)

And Steve thinks, sometimes, that Eddie stays through his breakfast so he can watch. Thinks he waits for Steve to have his fill, maybe enjoys their time together in a similar way Steve does. Always gravitating towards Eddies company, harbouring what he has accepted is a massive crush on the man. 

Steve really hopes he not reading Eddie wrong. 

He mentions it to Robin, who always leaves the apartment before the both of them. Mentions how Eddie looks at him, stares, his gaze lingering and roaming over the parts of Steve that are changing. Steve’s cheeks pink, mumbling his way though a half explanation that he wants Eddie to look. That he likes how his body has changed. 

Robin says she'll keep an eye out, do some ‘research’, but only if he promises to keep her out of whatever weird sex shit it might involve. 

Steves cheeks heat further, nervous - what if he is wrong and Eddie thinks it’s weird too, doesn't like it. Doesn't actually like Steve or what he's chosen to do to himself. Maybe Steve is the real freak in all this. 

But Robin hugs him, called him a dingus in that way that sounds like I love you. Corrects and soothes - that she's not judging, doesn't think he's weird, and Eddie would never judge him either. 

Even if Steve is wrong about how Eddie looks at him, he'd never stop being Steves friend, she knows that much for sure. 

She's right, he guesses. And it’s his body, his life, it shouldn’t matter how he looks. He just never wants to loose them… 

And then he's forced to face it all head on. Test the waters - see Eddies reaction to a situation that solidly fits into the realm of what Steve’s discovered he’s into. The weird sex shit as Robin artfully put it. (Eddies opinion on it all still very much up for debate, even after Robin watched Eddie watch Steve eat a whole large cheese pizza to himself - she said she couldn't tell if he was impressed in a bro way or a gay way.)

But, Steve takes so long to get dressed that morning because no amount of sucking in, or laying down or pulling up then pulling down, will put his button through the hole. 

His pants won't do up. 

He gets the zipper half way, and his shirt is long enough to hide the worst of it, but he needs a safety pin, if he's going to get to work and look half way presentable.

'Eddie?' He calls, from right by his door. 

There's shuffling, the scrape of a chair. 'Yeah?' Eddie asks.

'Uh, I have good news and bad news' Steve shouts, not really sure what to say. 

'Okay...' Eddie says, slowly, closer now. Right by Steves door. 'Whats the bad news?' 

Steve swallows, bites his lip. 'I ah, I need your help.' He settles on. 

There's a pause, Steves heart hammers in his ears. 'Steve, what? Are you okay?’ Eddie says, confused. 'I'm coming in, okay?' And he pushes at the door before Steve can give an answer, pushes as he saying it, a tinge of stress to his voice. 

Steve is standing with his shirt up, staring at himself. Belly pushing the flaps of jeans apart, muffin top and stretch marks on display. He feels himself go red, palms sweating over how Eddie will react to this, to him. 

'Just, do-do you have a safety pin?' Steve stammers, embarrassed, but, he really needs one. 

Eddies eyes seem to be glued to his middle. 'I, yeah, yeah man.' He says and steps away, leaving the room, pulling his eyes away last. 

Steve sits down heavily on the bed, burying his red face in his hands and groaning.  

Eddie ambles back into the room, pin in hand. 'Here, sit back.' He says gently, kneeling between Steve thighs. god. 

Steve rests back on his palms and then drops onto his elbows once it becomes apparent that hands aren’t enough to give Eddie the access he needs. 

And then Eddie’s nimble fingers are pulling at his waistband, his warm skin brushing against the sensitive underside of Steve’s stomach. And Eddies eyes are soft, and kind. 

Steve has to bite his lip to stifle a noise, feeling it in his groin. embarrassed by the whole situation. 

That he likes it. 

That he likes it so much. 

He’s turned on by so much that’s going on right now. But it’s all too raw, and he feels so vulnerable under Eddie. Under the dream that he might like it too. Under the fear that he won’t, won’t like Steve because of this. Or, maybe worse, could relent and just like Steve in despite of it. 

And thankfully his jeans are so tight there’s no way of knowing that his cock is half hard as Eddie tugs lightly on the secured pin. And Steve aches because there’s a pillow crease on Eddies cheek and sleep still stuck to an eyelash and his t-shirt is worn and stretched and faded and Steve yearns. He likes Eddie so much, has done for so long. 

But he ate himself out of his jeans. Did it every morning with Eddie’s eyes on him and he still doesn’t know that it means. Doesn't know what to say. What to do. 

And Eddies eyes are soft, all of him so kind. 

‘And the good news?' Eddie asks, looking up again at Steve finally. 

Steve makes a noice, confused. He's feeling foggy and strung out and he wishes so bad he didn’t have to work, could just burrow under his covers and hide instead. 

‘You said there was good news and bad news, what’s the good news?’ Eddie smiles up at him. He’s so pretty in the morning, all day. Always. 

'You uh, just, won't need to sit through me eating breakfast this morning.' Steve says, huffing but it doesn't really feel funny. He feels exposed and too hot. But maybe it is funny, in fact, that he also feels really really hungry. 

And Eddie’s eyes widen slightly in shock, his cheeks dusting pretty pink. 'I uh, really like having breakfast with you dude, don't uh, you skipping? Thats not good news.' And his hand is on Steve’s knee, big brown eyes looking up at him. 

Steve bites his lip again, mouth morphing into a small shy smile he can’t stifle. He nods. 

He goes and makes breakfast. 

-

Steve gets new jeans and keeps eating while Eddie watches. They haven't said anything but sometimes Eddie refills Steves cereal bowl unprompted, sometimes he sits with Steve and Robin at dinner too. 

The next time Steve eats a whole cheese pizza to himself while Robin and Eddie are present they’re all high but Robin is now positive that he’s impressed in a gay way. ‘A very, very gay way Steve. I saw that pillow move into his lap, shoot your shot bud, weird sex shit and all.’ 

And Steve is growing impatient, the tension and subtext sending him a little insane. He just, he needs to know. If Eddie could like him back, if their friendship can survive Eddie not reciprocating. If Steve can keep exploring this part of himself - but with someone. If he can have everything he ever dreamed of, maybe, with Eddie. 

Steve needs to know, so one Saturday, he goes out and he buys breakfast…

It’s a few months later and Eddie notices that Steve recently upgraded his shirts, again. Now they sit looser, flowing down and following out over the crest of his belly. Eddie thinks they're the same jeans though, that Steve bought at the end of that day, the day with the safety pin. The first time he got to touch. 

He then spent the day thinking about how he actually feels about Steve. Half freaking out, half feeling like everything finally made sense. Too scared to act on what he realised were real feelings, a real crush. He thought about it, at least. 

And now that Eddie’s thought about it, come to some conclusions for himself. He notices more. Like how he notices that, now, after what is arguable a pretty short amount of time, Eddie can see that these jeans are tight too. Straining, restricting Steves movements slightly as they fight against his thicker thighs. He notices Steve wearing sweats a lot more, or just not changing out of his pyjama pants, if he's home from work. The drawstrings on them never pulled tight. The seams of them though, along his thighs and over his ass. Those are pulled tight. Pulled to bursting. 

Eddie doesn’t know what to do.

They still have breakfast together every morning. Steve upgrading to a cheese and egg omelette, toast, and a bigger bowl of cereal in the mornings now. Eddie still sticking to two cups of coffee and wandering eyes. Allowing himself to join Steve and Robin for dinner when he can, when schedules match up. Its fun, ordering pizza and watching movies, but Eddie has had to get skilful with their pillows, subtle as he pulls them onto his lap. Due to Steve now being in the habit of finishing large cheese pizzas all to himself. In his tightening pyjama pants, lips shiny with grease. 

Eddie kind of feels like a freak, noticing these things about Steve. But, it’s Steve. And maybe he’s reading it all wrong, but he thinks Steve maybe likes what Eddie likes. Thinks maybe they might be more similar than he ever thought. 

Eddie doesn’t know what to do. But something’s gotta give. 

It’s Saturday when it all comes to a head, Steve comes home with breakfast for them both, jeans criminally tight and slung low like most things he owns, allowing his belly and soft love handles to sit above, to breathe. His t-shirt is one of the older ones, criminally, obscenely tight, highlighting his curves and width and softness. But still long enough for him to be covered fully, fabric tight but covering the jeans waistband fully. 

Surely Steve won't hate him for it, that Eddie is a little breathless over the sight of him, not once Eddie explains. Explains that it's all of it, all of him. That it’s always just been Steve, with or without the weight. 

Robin's away visiting her parents and Eddie said yes to an egg and cheese bagel. Steve sets the contents of the brown bag out on the table, bagel and a hash brown for Eddie, large coffee. Two bagels and four hash browns, a side of sausage, an orange juice and coffee, for Steve. 

He also bought a dozen donuts, for some reason. 

Steve sits down heavily in the chair. A soft oof as he lays a hand on the side of his gut and reaches forward for his juice, chugging about half in one sweet go. 

Eddie smiles at him over the rim of his coffee, Steve blushing ever so slightly. Eyelashes casting shadows across his softer cheeks. 

‘Thanks Stevie, this is really nice.’ Eddie says, doesn’t say that it almost feels like a date. Could feel like a date. Something intimate about it being a quiet Saturday morning alone together. 

'Almost feels like a date.' Steve says, taking his first big bite of sausage. 

Eddie coughs. Steve’s blushing again. He shifts in his chair, but he has this set to his jaw, like he’s being brave, like it’s scary, but he’s being brave. 

Eddie puts his coffee down, picks up his sandwich and holds it out to Steve in cheers. ‘To our first date.’ He says, smiling, looking Steve in the eye. 

Steve laughs, sunshine and fizzy apple juice. He cheers’ Eddie’s sandwich with his own. 

Eddie can be brave too. 

They talk about work, and Robin, and Dustin back home. About when Eddie’s next thinking of visiting Wayne and how they still need to fix the lock in the bathroom door. Eddie makes his way slowly though his food, Steve is a little quicker but he has more. Big bites filling his cheeks and a dollop of sauce falling onto his shirt. Eddie smiles and hands him a napkin. Steve smiles back, licking his fingers clean and letting that hand migrate back to the side of his belly. Fingers rubbing and prodding lightly again. Eddie tries not to stare. 

‘I probably shouldn’t eat that.’ Steve says, motioning to his second bagel, crushing the hash brown bag in his fist. The last part of his breakfast. His belly noticeably a little bigger, a little fuller on his thighs. 

‘Why?’ Eddie asks, taken aback. 

Steve huffs, self deprecating. ‘I dunno if you’ve noticed Ed’s but, I’m getting kinda fat.’ He says, embarrassed sort of smile on his face. ‘Who’m I kidding, of course you noticed, you had to help me when I outgrew those jeans last month.’ He dips his head, hand rubbing over his face and then resting at the top of his stomach, smoothing over the dome, belly button outlined in the tight fabric. 

Eddie snaps his eyes away from the movement. ‘Steve.’ He says. ‘You, you look good.’ He swallows. ‘You look, really good. And I, I think if you wanna eat that bagel then, well then you should.’ Eddie stammers, but his voice is clear and strong, he feels fire in his eyes. 

Because it’s true, everything, all of it. 

Steve’s smile stretches, blooming across his face, blinding, beautiful. ‘Yeah?’ He asks softly, sweetly, with awe. 

‘Yeah, yes.’ Eddie says, nodding his head and leaving forward to nudge the bagel closer to Steve. He wants him to eat it, Eddie realises. ‘I, um, I want you to, to eat it.’ He says, clearing his throat but refusing to look away from the bright eyes before him. 

Steve breaks eye contact first, ducking his head and unwrapping the sandwich with his big, delicate fingers. Taking a bite and letting the grease run down his wrist. 

Steve swallows, licking it up, eyes back on Eddie. 

‘Fuck.’ he breaths. Fingers fiddling with his empty coffee cup.

He scoots his chair around, bringing it in close to where Steve sits. Needing to share space with him, feel his body heat. Aching to touch.

Steve keeps his eyes on Eddie as he moves, biting and chewing and swallowing his way through the bagel methodically. Like it’s a reflex, an extension of himself. 

Eddie reaches forward and wipes away a rogue smear of ketchup from Steve’s cheek with his thumb. Bringing it up to his own mouth and sucking it clean. It’s sweet, and tangy. 

‘I gotta, uh, show you something. A, a secret.’ Steve says. Last bit of bagel held still in his fingers. Eyes wide and a little crazed, voice tinged with fear or glee; Eddie’s not really sure. 

‘Okay?’ He asks, voice quieter than he means. Reverent. 

Steve shifts slightly and presses his fingers into the bottom most curve of softness. Lifting his belly up and out of the way. Revealing his button and fly to Eddie. 

Which is no longer able to fasten, instead held together by a safety pin. The same one as before, on that morning. 

‘Fuck.’ Eddie shivers. Looks back up at Steve in awe. ‘Can i kiss you?' He rasps, fingers falling onto Steve’s thigh as he leans forward. 

Steve gasps quietly and nods, resettling his belly on his thighs. Eddie leans in further, their lips connecting. stars exploding behind his eyes. The soft press more infinite than anything he’s ever felt before. Because, maybe, maybe because it’s Steve. It’s Steve’s lips he’s kissing. He digs his fingers into the meat of Steve’s legs. Grounding himself in the kiss so he doesn’t float away entirely. 

Eddie lick over the seam of Steve’s lips lightly but Steve pulls away with a small gasp. Hand covering Eddie’s as he pants. ‘Sorry. Getting full.’ He huffs, blush rinsing on his cheekbones again. He shoves the last bit of bagel in his mouth and slouches further in the chair. He looks round and soft as he takes a deeper breath of air. 

Eddie laughs, delighted and leans forward once more, knees knocking against Steve’s. ‘Can I?’ He asks, hand hovering over the warm side of belly that Steve’s been petting all morning. Eddie swallows thickly as his eyes flick from Steve’s face back down to his hand. 

Steve smiles, nods. The blush running down his neck. 

The first press of fingertips on warm skin is heaven. Eddie almost can’t believe it’s his hand doing it. Finally. Steve is so soft; pliant and arching under Eddie’s soft hold. 

He splays his palm over it, cupping it with both hands and marvelling at the width, the weight. 

Steve’s finger taps Eddie on the chin. He looks up, snapping his mouth shut. Steve smiling at him, eyes sleepy and relaxed and he looks so happy. 

‘What took us so long?' Steve sighs, eyes roaming over Eddie’s face. Arching up further into Eddie’s hands. 

'Was worried you'd think I was weird.' Eddie admits quietly, leaning forward to steal another soft kiss, hands rubbing small circles into the flesh beneath his hands, can feel Steve’s short breaths fanning over his face, his lips shiny with spit. 

Steve smiles, charming and biting and so so Steve. ‘You? Weird? Never.' He teases. 

‘Wanna be weird together?’ Eddie asks, licking over Steve’s lips, making them wet. 

‘How about uh, you pass me those donuts?' Steve motions with his head and spreads his legs wider in the chair. His hand dwarfing Eddie’s as he uses it up to lift his belly again. Grunting as he forces the safety pin open and tugs it from his jeans. 

Eddie lingers, enamoured, helping to hold Steve’s belly out of the way. Watching his sides spill wider once they’re released from the tight denim. 

Steve tosses the pin on the table and resettled his belly again. Looking pointedly at Eddie and lifting his chin again cheekily. 

Eddie places the box within reach. Steve plucking one from the lineup. 

Steve doesn’t say anything as he ploughs through the first. Only half way through the second does he pull Eddie’s hand more firmly onto his gut, urging him to move them again. 

‘Feels good.' Steve says around a mouthful, sighing. He’s eating them in two or three bites, already on his third. 'like, stretched but, grounded, maybe.' 

‘Oh, it’s, so, you do like it? The, the weight?' Eddie asks. 

'Mostly I just like eating. But, can't say the weight is anything bad... Just, it feels good, all of it.' Steve talks with his mouth full, sugary glaze stuck in the stubble on his upper lip. 

Eddie nods, cheeks slightly pink. He reaches over and picks up a donut, scooting closer so he’s between Steves spread thighs. The view of his belly a little more above, pale skin spilling out of his hiked up T-shirt. Spreading over his open fly. He has a stretch mark on his arm, on the inside, over his tricep. Eddie never notices it before. 

He holds the donut up to Steves mouth, he'd only have to lean forward slightly to take a bite. 'This okay?' Eddie rasps, hand shaking slightly. Steve looking up at him though his lashes. 

He rests a hand over Eddie’s own on his stomach again. Smoothing them down and then up, causing his shirt to lift more, sitting snug under his pecs. He dips forward, chair creaking, biting into the donut enough for Eddie to feel his fingers brush Steves chin. His cheeks bulge as he chews, hand moving again.

‘More than okay Ed's, this is, it’s.' Steve can’t finish so Eddie shoves the rest of the donut into his mouth. He doesn't need him to explain, rationalise what he wants. 

He just wants Steve to feel good. 

Eddie reaches for another donut. 

-

WG Taglist (open): @scoops-aboy86 @chickensinrainboots @cheesedoctor

[astarlow]

Characters: Mercy, D.Va Form: Mix Warning: none Synopsis: their favourite body part about you Word Count: 892 A/n: Requests are open again but don't expect to be answered any time soon, school's taking almost all of my free time so i have little to no time to write for pleasure. I hope y'all being doing great otherwise

Mercy - Chest

🕊️ Angela loves to place her head on your chest, just to be able to listen to your heartbeat. It means you're here, she's here and you're both alive. And that's something she knows she has to cherish before it's gone all too quickly. Sometimes, before leaving she'll place a hand on your chest, just above your sternum to give her support for a kiss.

🕊️ It's also watching you sound asleep, noticing your breathing pattern making your chest rise and fall. By now, she knows it by heart. Whether you take deep breaths or shallow ones, nothing escapes her trained eyes.

You just finished making coffee for your loved one, pouring it into a cup. You know she needs her caffeine to start the day in a good mood. You actually wonder if it's working as well as it used to because her intake increased throughout the years. You wouldn't be surprised if it did. There are some clicks on the ground and soon enough, Angela is entering the kitchen. She has her work outfit already on and you wonder if it's comfortable to wear.

"Heya Angel," you mutter. She places a soft kiss on your lips.

"Hello," she responds with sleepiness in her voice. You restrain yourself from chuckling, opting to hand her a cup of coffee.

"Here, to start the day." She sits down on a stool, taking it in her hands. She smells the aroma of the coffee and grins.

"Thank you Liebling." She takes a sip and she closes her eyes. "Just as I like it." She continues to enjoy her coffee while you watch her enjoy this simple cup. You've learned your way around making Angela's favourite coffee.

The beans, the right temperature to brew it, how to do it exactly, if any sweetener has been needed. It's been lots of trials and errors but you can confidently say you've learned how to perfectly make them for her. Before long, she has finished her cup and she's rinsing it. You accompany her to the door, kissing her forehead as to say goodbye.

She gently places her right hand right above your heart and she leans in to kiss you back on the cheek.

"Have a good day." She lingers a little bit more before breaking the kiss. She looks at you one last time, giving you a slight nod. Her hand leaves last.

"Thank you, have a great day as well."

D.Va - Arms

🐰 Hana loves it- LOVES it when you put your arms around her. She feels safe when she senses your warmth spreading to her body. Of course, please put your arms strategically or you'll be at the receiving end of Hana's shouts. It's better to do this when she's on the console rather than a PC because she has more freedom when she's with a controller. You almost have no opportunity to do this when she's on her PC (also no place to do so)

🐰 She bought a special couch to allow more space for the both of you to fit on one square of couch. Sometimes, when she's exhausted, she's going to doze off in your arms. You sense those days quite easily so you have blankets at the ready and at arm length.

🐰 When the day's been long and exhausting. When stress and anxiety seep in, please spoon her to sleep. She finds it easier when you have your arms around her but she has a hard time expressing it out loud.

"Oh come on, it's not that hard!" She watches you struggle to get to the next level while she sits in your lap, sipping from her drink. Your controller is on her lap as you wrapped your arms around her.

"Hey! It kinda is! You just have waaay more experience than me." You lose another life and you place a hand on your face to groan.

"Damn right I am! Lemme show you how it's done," she says playfully but you know she's serious. You hand her the controller and watch attentively her moves. And as she said, it's way more effective than what you were doing.

You know best than to bother her right now. She's well focused on her game. It's in the slight straightening of her spine, the little squint of her eyes, a controlled breathing pattern and of course, the sound of perfectly hit buttons at the right time. Still, you lightly increase the grasp of the hug and you see the concentration is broken for a little moment.

Her lips part away, enough to make it noticed by you but not enough to say something. Her stance relaxes once more and you feel she leans in your embrace. Once she defeats the boss you've been struggling to fight for the past hour, she hands you back the controller and it becomes chill again. The heavy atmosphere evaporates as it never existed to begin with. You continue the game but it's starting to get late and you're both quite tired.

One, more than the other. You hear her little snores and decide it's enough for today. You close the game and switches off the TV screen. You grab the two blankets behind the couch and place it on you two. You kiss the top of her head before closing your eyes as well.

"Goodnight Hana,"

[tachimichishrine]

"barista"

⫭◦⨝◦⫬

hunting dogs x gn!barista!reader hcs

warnings: none!!

jouno saigiku

oh dear

harasses everyone

harasses his partner

harasses his mf FOOD

by this, I mean he sends things back, not bc he isn't satisfied but bc he can

ESPECIALLY if his partner is on their shift, he'll be extra nasty

"what can I get you today, Jouno?"

"an iced coffee, with specifically 5 cubes of ice 2cm by 2cm, 1 pack sweetener, a drizzle of chocolate and 25ml of 3% milk and, oh, do you have chocolate sprinkles? yeah, I want some of that on top, add some whipped cream too and-"

orders the longest thing and then sends it back because "there were incomplete sprinkles" while staring down the barista with a huge grin

his partner is literally on the verge of breaking up with him for this

however, sometimes he gets bored of toying with them and just orders a coffee

he likes to observe people

it's kinda creepy but he'll pick a seat in the corner and listen as his partner writes down orders and smiles at other people, and then gets somewhat internally offended when they laugh at the random customer's dumb jokes

he narrows his eyes (even more, if that's possible?) at them at wonders why he doesn't make them laugh as loudly as that

takes it as a challenge

now you've got a clingy af jouno who sticks around the desk and seduces his way into the kitchen by flirting with the manager (his partner's boss)

his partner wants to YELL at him that they have to work, but he just places his hands on their hips and kisses their forehead and gives them the slightest hug and tells them how much he loves them, so their partner reluctantly tolerates his presence around their work

he may not know how to cook but he smells every single ingredient and is a surprisingly fast learner so the manager is lowkey trying to recruit him bc of his undeniable talent 👹

overall, he does help in the end, but his partner has to put up with a lot of teasing and nastiness. occasional jokes and cute little pranks where jouno would place a heavily powdered donut under their nose to make them sneeze and eventually messing up the ENTIRE place

but damn, those perfect milkshakes he made are worth it all

tecchou suehiro

he is easily distracted

asks his partner all sorts of things

"hey, how do they make coffee?"

"well, you put the beans in the machine-"

"beans???"

"yes??? coffee beans???"

"coffee???comes???from??beans???"

"yes, tecch, it does u adorable idiot 🙄"

"does that mean you can make coffee out of the beans they put in burritos and stuff?"

"no- wait I don't think so- actually, maybe-"

other customers overhear the discussion and chip in and the entire thing escalates to the WEIRDEST topics

the manager is pretty impartial as to his presence, given that he doesn't disturb anyone and usually just orders and silently observes his partner with a faint smile on his lips

his partner turns, notices his gaze and bites the inside of their cheek to prevent themselves from blushing/grinning at him, then get back to work

they do, however, like to blow him little kisses while on their shift, or to leave a small note on Tecchou's orders like "ily <3" or "you're so cute ��"

he is a gentleman omg

he once spent the entire time his partner was on their shift holding the door for the people who entered

gets asked if he works there, and he automatically replies yes and helps everyone with their stuff, whether it's a broken glass or spill or if they need sweetener in their drink

nvm the manager now loves him

he makes it a point to visit his s/o as often as possible when they're working, even if they live together or have a date planned for later that day. he might not say much, but he loves to be in their presence as often as possible

a literal GOD at taking care of angry customers

whereas jouno would probably subtly threaten them, Tecchou is just gonna walk up to their face and be rly straight-forward about it

"sir, what's your problem?"

"I placed my order for coffee, a SINGLE COFFEE OVER HALF AN HOUR AGO AND I STILL HAVEN'T RECEIVED IT??? THIS SERVICE IS TERRIBLE-"

"sir, just take a breath. the employee over here is going to make it for you right away, and free of charge, right?"

ofc, they'd nod and do as he said bc the person is no longer fuming

the biggest issue with having tecchou in the café is his orders

he asks for the oddest things, including, but not limited to, sugar on rice and a hard-boiled egg with the shell still on

his partner makes sure to explain to their boss that this isn't anything abnormal for him, and that they'll make sure to take care of the order themselves

after all, putting together a weird food combo in order to get a chubby-cheeked tecchou stuffing his face with sugary rice is very worthwhile

teruko okura (aged up?? ig??? bc children running around a café is odd i think?? wtf is her real age-)

she is NOT made to be in a café with a serene vibe

no bc she picks up fights with everyone who breathes

"hey, idiot, stop breathing so loudly or else i'll come over there and shut you up myself-"

her partner thus keeps a stall in the very corner specifically for her that's far away from the other people 😐

teruko loves sugary and spicy flavors all in one, like a strong cinnamon or ginger, any type of warm drink that smells strongly rly

her partner does that mystical thing with the milk that creates a heart on the surface of the drink that looks so cute 

teruko chugs down the drink without even looking at it 💀

she isn't one for those kinds of gestures, and would much rather physically cling to her partner's side instead

sneaks up from under the counter and then pops up like a weasel with a HUGE smile on her face, the kind of cute smile that is like, showing all of her teeth and SUPER contagious and makes you wanna pat her on the head and hug her

the manager DOES NOT agree with this tho and kicks her out repeatedly. teruko is so close to snapping the manager's neck but her partner intervenes and reminds her that they still need their job

the entire café, teruko concludes, is against her

the powdered sugar gets thrown into her face by an unknown force

salt gets dumped on her hair

she slips on a puddle in the corner

the milkshake machine explodes in her face

it's just NOT her scene

that is the last time she visited her partner while at work, telling them that she's going to be waiting outside once their shift is over bc the pain is NOT worth it

fukuchi ochi

fukuchi barely has time to spend with his s/o, given how much of a busy man he is

so, he'll support them by financing the café itself and making sure they get high-quality ingredients and that the working conditions are acceptable

he does make it a point to ONLY get his coffee from there, tho, but doesn't use it as an excuse to talk to his partner. he's in he gets the coffee, then he's out

for this reason, his partner - who is not an idiot and needs human affection just like the rest of the planet - "suddenly and mysteriously" becomes a klutz

"accidentally" drops the coffee on him as they're serving his order, which leads him to freak out, and then rush to the bathroom to wash it off

apologizing profusely, his partner will follow him to the bathroom and help him out, using this as an opportunity to 1) get him to take off his shirt 😌 2) talk to him

this happens for about 3 weeks before his dense ass realizes that they just want some love

tries this out, showing up and ordering his usual coffee, and then asks them how their day has been

they BEAM at him, and gush about the tiniest things

he won't admit to himself that he loves seeing them so happy like that and that it makes his heart flutter a bit, instead telling himself the next time he stays that he's doing it "out of convenience" or some bs like that

eventually finds himself spending hours in the café just talking to his partner about random things, whether that is during their break or while the s/o is supposed to be working

the manager doesn't have the balls to tell him that they're supposed to be working bc fukuchi supplies like half the financial funds for the place 😍

he might start to be showing up late to hunting dogs' meetings for the next while, but spending the time with his partner has been shown to be more than worth.

tachihara michizou

It's very likely that the café is the place he met his partner, or at least has some kind of emotional value to him

either it's where they first asked him out (bc there's no way he'd make the first move) or maybe he was caught in the rain and his future partner, walking out of the café while holding an umbrella, offered it to him with a bright smile

for this reason, he likes to meet them here as much as possible

HOWEVER, there's an issue with dating tachihara, a big one at that

mid-way through the relationship, he had to go undercover and work for the mafia

since his partner had met him and knew only of his work as being "dangerous" and "top-secret", they understood a bit when he said that he had to go on a business trip of sorts and things would get complicated

tachihara lowkey went into a full-on breakdown bc he had never been loved like that before and felt sick at the idea of leaving, but his partner assured him that they'll be waiting for the day he comes back, and held him in their arms for the entire night, murmuring sweet nothings into his ear and gently kissing his forehead

eventually, he did have to leave. in the beginning, he teared up every night while in the port mafia thinking of his love

so, once he got the mafia's trust and moved along in the ranks, he got more freedom to move around and stuff. eventually, he got so heartsick he found himself subconsciously wandering right in front of the café out of habit

before he could snap out of his trance and get tf out of there, his partner noticed him and pulled him into the tightest hug in existence while sobbing their heart out

tachihara couldn't imagine the pain of saying goodbye for good again

so, he made it a rule to come and visit them on his shifts as often as possible, discreetly for their safety

they a b a n d o n their job and run over to hug him every single time he appears bc they never know if it'll be the last time they'll see him

the manager doesn't really follow the story, but tachihara's partner is one of the harder workers in the café, and the café itself isn't that popular anyways, so there's no point in yelling at them

tachihara isn't picky about what food he eats or what drinks he sips, so long as he gets to hear his partner's voice and be near them (I strongly hc that he has attachment issues)

he orders hot chocolate, even in the summer, and still hasn't shaken off that child-like tendency of chugging it down aggressively and ending up with a chocolate milk mustache, which his partner teases him about every single time

one time, he wasn't vigilant enough and gin - who was supposed to deliver a message from the boss about one thing or another - followed tachihara all the way to the café

saw tachihara kissing some stranger 👩‍🦯👩‍🦯👩‍🦯

she walked up to him, and his eyes went WIDE. his partner didn't recognize gin for obvious reasons, and thus got embarrassed, climbed off of tachihara and stood back at the counter, and asked her what her order was, since technically the shop was still operating

gin was confused af

she creased her brows at them, shook her head then turned towards tachihara

oh boy tachihara is screwed

at first, his partner thought he'd been cheating on them or something, then thought about it twice and realized that he wasn't the type to cheat on people. so they (not-so-)gently shoved gin out of the way and told tachihara that they "needed a smoke", a codeword for "outside. now. we need to talk"

he told gin that he'd received the message, and to tell the boss that he'll deal with it tomorrow, and then the mafiosa went on her way. 

his s/o demanded an explanation as to who tf that was, and tachihara reluctantly explained that it was someone he worked with

his partner isn't an idiot, they knew that his work was dangerous and that "someone he worked with" would be equally so, and thus they realized by the way he was perspirating with cold sweat and seemed pretty shocked that the girl had shown up

eventually, things were sorted out and no harm was done. tachihara made gin swear she wouldn't tell anyone about his dating situation, and like the frikkin amazing person she is, she agreed.

even though he slipped up that time, he couldn't stop himself from heading back to the café and meeting up with his partner as often as possible

in the end, the risk was clearly worth it

[donniesexceptionalmind]

A recipe guide for "when food just doesn't appeal to you, but you know you have to eat because your body needs energy to stay alive, YET your brain is too stupid to understand that & of course you also haven't hydrated enough"-™️

The most convenient food shakes are full of added sugar & fats to make them rich in calories, which isn't very healthy at all. Sure, fats are important, yet they must be the right ones. For them to be satiating, proteins do a much better job than fats & they play important roles in our body.

And, like my psychiatrist & doctor said: Fresubin is a free pass for cleaning your bowels aka it's bad. (I laughed when they told me, like, what??? Hearing this from a professional??)

(Add.: They use Fresubin here as liquid food in medical care & YES, I was actively forced to drink it when I was in treatment for my anorexia & it was highly TRAUMATIC for me & I thought I could NEVER drink any food shakes again)

Nowadays, I sometimes buy a shake from a brand & it's hazelnut flavored & sweetened with dattes & uses protein from peas. It has also added vitamins & minerals, which is why I buy it, since I usually have deficits (get your blood once or twice a year checked by your doctor!)

Also, edit seconds before I posted this: I got so many ideas while writing & it turned out longer than I intended, so enjoy ✨️

✨️ My main recipe: ✨️

4 tb of oats

2 cups of (plant-) milk OR for extra protein 1 cup liquid, 1/2 pound of yoghurt (I also tried water, but it's not as satiating, obviously) (I assume protein powder would also help, but I don't use it)

200g of berries (any, feel free to experiment. My personal favourite are raspberries)

1 tsp of honey or whatever source of sweetness you prefer (dattes, maple syrup...)

1 tsp of grated coconut

What to do: Because I use frozen berries, I heat up the milk. Then I put everything together & blend for a few seconds. Finito~

Drink with a straw, straws do wonders ;]

Variations of this:

You don't have to add the coconut; you can also add peanut butter, blended nuts, seeds... for me, this is usually a source of fats, not flavour

Don't like berries? Use a different fruit with the same weight

Swap berries with a banana & use 2 tsp of cacao for a chocolate-y shake

I think blueberry & vanilla would work great together, haven't tried that yet

Cacao & cinnamon for a cristmas-y feel, maybe you can swap the fruits & crunch 3 or 4 cookies...? I'd raise the amount of oats to 5 tb (I want to try this now)

1 big Apple, caramel & cinnamon seems like a good combination as well

I do want to try out blending tofu instead of oats & see how that tastes (actually, I'll try that out next)

I've read you can replace oats with chickpeas (which are high in protein) & you CAN make chickpeas taste like cookiedough...

If you don't like oats, you can try amaranth, buckwheat, ... whatever appeals to you as long as you add a complex carbohydrate source

And if you are a coffee junkie like me, here's my fav coffee: (can be blended but also just shaken, depends on what you put in, DON'T FORGET THE LID)

1 cup of cold coffee OR 2 cups of espresso

1/2 cup of coconut cuisine OR other cuisine, it must have a creamy texture, creamier than milk

1/2 cup of (plant-) milk

1-2 tps of flavour: cacao, vanilla, honey, caramel... (Please keep in mind what you mix in if you used coconut cuisine because that adds flavour already, e.g., caramel & coconut are not good together)

I believe you can also add fruit to this for creaminess & flavour, I haven't tried that yet - half a banana seems like a nice idea

My next experiment: ADDING PEANUT BUTTER TO IT, I love it & I need a creamy coffee with it

The coffee thing is not a meal replacement, it's a "snack" kind of thing. A treat. I recommend eating your favourite cookie with it. Or two. Or three. Or- 😎

Vegetables are also important, Donnie!! I imagine Mikey say- BUT for consuming vegetables I always make myself a soup from scratch & that's working out very fine. It usually only takes 10 to 20 minutes (depends on the lentils I put in) & it's always nice.

~ 2 cups brooth of your choice (depends how watery you like it - more lentils & noodles, more water or you get what I call sludge - you either love it or not)

~ two hands of soup veggies (I use a frozen mix which is cubic-sized chopped, it needs to be QUICK, OKAY)

~ 2-3 oz of uncooked lentils (I use red lentils 95% of time since they only need ~10 minutes to be ready, but you can also use canned lentils & you don't have to cook them, especially if you want to use beans because uncooked beans need to sit in water for at least a few hours/ overnight is the safest way AND be cooked for ~1 hour)

~ a hand of noodles, like ramen, udon, glass, soba, instant noodles... (as you can see, I prefer asian noodles)

Preferred herbs/spices: garlic (fresh or powder), onion (fresh or powder) pepper, chili, cumin, caraway (whole seeds), nutmeg, cilantro & salt (just don't use too much, usually the brooth as enough in it; I rarely add salt)

Bonus: 1 tps of miso paste or soy sauce (if I do this, I cook ramen)

Add whatever you want if you're omnivorous: egg, meat, tofu, funghi, algae ... basically make yourself ramen

Bonus: eat it with a toast, slice of bread... It's not necessary, yet sometimes my brain needs a crunchy texture to be "happy"

✨️Friendly Reminder✨️:

You are not bad for struggling with eating regularly.

Edit: You probably noticed I always think about how to add the three macronutrients: complex carbohydrates, protein & fats - THIS IS BASIC NUTRITION KNOWLEDGE 😌💅🏻

[alexxncl]

how the obey me characters like their coffee

brothers, dateables + luke, and side characters

resurgence of my coffee obsession has me thinking thoughts

and i'm right bc they all told me this themselves

masterlist | more drabbles/hcs

lucifer

i feel like he likes his shit sickeningly sweet...like you can barely taste the coffee

so much creamer it almost looks like milk, so much sugar that your teeth will fall out just by looking at it

it used to help him stay awake, but he's immune to it now. he just drinks it to drink it

he doesn't care for iced coffee that much. he had a sip of mammon's and almost gagged

mammon

the blackest coffee you've ever seen, extra espresso shots, whether it's hot or iced

y'all know how pedro pascal and jaemin from nct like their coffee? yeah...nasty

if he hasn't had his coffee, don't talk to him

unless you're mc or luke. then you have a pass

he drinks it before he leaves the house, while he's walking to RAD, while he's in class, while he's at lunch, while he's in detention, while he's-

you get the picture

but he won't admit that he's addicted

levi

he likes chai tea 🫶🏽

coffee never sat well with him, it made him more anxious than he already is

he likes the taste but he can live without it

he drank a bunch of it once while pulling an all-nighter with mammon before an exam...never again

luci and mams keep a very close eye on his caffeine intake

satan

no cream or milk, but a shit ton of sugar

"bitter like my soul" headass

he doesn't drink it often, but he's particular when he does

doesn't like hot coffee because he can't drink it right away

either makes it himself or asks asmo to do it when he's too tired

asmo

more milk than sugar with a pretty design on top

an oat milk girlie

strongly prefers hot coffee but will drink either

he just has a knack for creative stuff, y'know?

i feel like he worked as a batista for a while and does little pop up shops for his fans :(

beel

he doesn't drink coffee like that. it doesnt do anything for him

but he likes sweet things, so he asks belphie to put flavored creamer or sweetened almond milk and a lot of sugar in it whenever he does drink some

he started drinking it to get closer to luci and mams, but he never made a habit out of it like the two of them

asked asmo if he could learn how to make it so that mammon wouldn't run out during the day and is actually really good at it

belphie

do NOT give him coffee

he hates it

it's nasty and it makes him jittery

he'll make it, and he's almost as good as asmo, but he won't drink it. absolutely not

diavolo

never really got the hype until he had some of lucifer's

only drinks his coffee that way now

he still prefers tea, but a little caffeine every now and then won't hurt

he tried black coffee and hated it. you know he loves his sweets

barbatos

drinks it on occasion but will lie if you ask him about it

he's THE tea demon, yk? can't let the title be for nothing

if he makes some for diavolo, he'll drink it however dia likes it

if he's just making it for himself, he likes it with a little sugar and no creamer

simeon

spiked (sometimes, when he's not writing) and black

mainly because he doesn't want luke to drink any and thinks this is the best course of action

also because it keeps him awake

(he's like lucifer, coffee doesn't do anything for him anymore. it's a habit atp)

solomon

spiked and sweet

he's too old and too tired

but it's only ever spiked with top shelf, aged, hard shit bc he's extra

tried it black and spiked and hated it

luke

please don't give the baby coffee

11 year olds don't need coffee

he kept asking to try it, so mammon gave him some of his (much to simeon's disdain) and he quite literally almost died

he'll never touch it again bc why is it so BITTER

he won't admit to it but he cried

mammon has proof - videos and pictures

mephisto

tried it once and threw it away

likes his black like mammon, but way less espresso

only likes iced americanos

also likes them extremely watered down ??? idk man he's weird

raphael

another tea drinker but he likes his caffeinated

can't stand the taste of coffee, he doesn't know how simeon drinks it so often

tried some of simeon's - before he started spiking it, mind you - and threw it away bc he thought it was disgusting

simeon did not in fact cry (yes he did)

thirteen

it depends on the day, but she's a mocha girlie 99% of the time

when just wants coffee or she's having a really bad day, she gets her usual

if it's a really good day, she gets something different

iced or hot, she doesn't care

a very specific order and only gets hers from a very specific mom and pop shop in a run-down area of the otherworld

[snapscube]

What's your favorite coffee creamer brand/flavor?

i actually don't really go for flavored creamer nowadays! maybe in the fall i'll pick up like a pumpkin spice but my average cup day-to-day doesn't have any creamer, i'll just sweeten it with some sugar or a bit of sugar free vanilla syrup. this is assuming i'm not making a latte in which case i like to go for oatmilk or almondmilk if we have it.