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paragonevil · 5 years ago

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EVENT CONCLUSION ⋆ Darkness Falls (#1)

Title: Six Hours in Hell Word count: 4819 Trigger warnings: suicide ideation, suicidal thoughts, death, gore, blood, alcoholism

Summary: Aku kills Jack once and for all.

This drabble concludes my event, Darkness Falls, and switches this blog from being set during Season 5 to being set in my Bad End verse— a timeline where Aku wins. For further details on this matter, and what that will entail for future RPs on this blog, I’d highly encourage you to check out the event tag.

Thanks to everyone who participated; and especially to @sonxflight, @nightmaresindreamland, and @implausiblynaive in particular, for their character’s contributions to the event’s plot. Zintaris, for letting Aku know about the sword situation; Nightmare for giving Aku the insight to finally try again at destroying Jack; and Morty for making Aku hate himself so much he had to channel it outwards or risk self-destructing.

Way down at the bottom of the Pit of Hate, Aku paced restlessly in his bedchambers, one arm behind his back, the other raised to his chin so as to wind his coarse black talons thoughtlessly through his beard. He stared hard straight ahead at nothing in particular, perhaps looking at some old bloodspot on the wall he’d forgot to magic away, or some dust bunny hidden deep in a crack in the rock. It was hard to say what details got through to him when he was like this— drowning in self-reflection and not really seeing much outside of himself at all. He tried to force himself to focus on one thought at a time as they occurred to him, yet not for the first time since this whole ordeal began, there’s no order to be had in the turmoil that was his mind. Thoughts rolled off one another like waves on beachrocks.

It’s been two hours and thirty six minutes since he’d received news that Jack had lost his sword.

Aku knows he should be out there now, taking care of his little ‘Problem’ before his nerve failed him — really just take advantage of this momentary boon before the moment could slip through his claws again. But for some reason he can’t seem to bring himself to act. At least... not right away. Despite having been shown ‘proof’ of the samurai’s misfortune, he can’t help but recall the last time someone had claimed Jack lost his sword... when that bastard Scaramouche had so foolishly betrayed him. Fat lot of good that had done him in the end; he’d paid the price for his stupidity with his life, and it was only through inordinate good fortune that Aku himself hadn’t met his demise at the time.

Even now, the stark memory of light glinting off that ancient, accursed weapon made his essence recoil. He could practically still hear that vicious hiss it had made when Jack had unsheathed it and pointed its tip at his nose, so close that even one step forward would plunge it through his face.

He was not keen to face Jack again, for fear of this being another set up, yet he supposed that one way or another this had been his intention all along since flying off the handle about a month ago— when he’d raised the bounty on Jack’s head exponentially. From 2 googolplex to name your price. No sum of money, no matter how large, could ever hope to pay for a service of such magnitude as this, at least in Aku’s eyes. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do to keep himself safe from the samurai’s judgment, even if it meant copping out and paying someone else to do his handiwork; however undignified and unsatisfying an end that would be.

Yessss.... ‘Judgment’ indeed, he thought bitterly, green lips twisting in disgust at his own cowardice as he paused in his pacing, black claws pausing as well to toy with the thinner wisps of hair which curled at the end of his beard. He hated feeling like he was at the mercy of the universe. Like he couldn’t take even a single step forward without being at risk of calling forth some cosmic comeuppance. A bitterly savage snarl rose from his chest at this thought, sounding very much like a wildcat.

—It was the universe which should submit to HIM not the other way around, blast it!

Since when did he care so much about the Judgment of bastard gods? He was a GOD in his own right, wasn’t he? That’s right... he thought, the grimace of disgust on his face taking on a faint edge of deep-seated indignation at this unfortunate circumstance. Being God, he should be able to live by his own damned rules... rule his own damned life... Why is it that even now, his Fate not his own? Who were They to call the shots? How dare they dictate what he could and could not destroy! What he could and could not consume!

Was it not a cosmic principle that Good could not exist without Evil? That law could not exist without Chaos? By all the Gods of Heaven, Hell, and all the Realms in-between Aku swore to himself he would be THAT GOD. The Greatest Evil this universe had ever known. The one meant to devour all. The black at the end of time, to which all life must surrender... But first... in order to do that and meet his destiny, he had to plan... And he had to plan well...

First and foremost, he must eliminate all roadblocks of his own mental creation—starting with that accursed samurai. Once Jack was out of the way, then he would turn to the Resistance, make examples of every last one of them that had so foolishly stood against him all this long time. Crucify them, hang them from the trees in the Forest of Aku. Stake their matted carcasses on poles, let the crows pick at them, let all his visitors pass through their mangled corpses and be watched by their hollow sightless eyes as they decomposed. Let such horror be a lesson to all who would stand against him!

And finally, once these physical obstacles were out of the way, then it would be time to work on problems within himself. Perhaps go to therapy for some time, like he’d been meaning to this entire time— attempt to find his way out of this self-imposed darkness. Find the motivation and courage to be socially-active again. Perhaps go out and make some friends, at last?

But... again... it all boiled down to getting rid of Jack first. Once Jack was out of the picture, there would be no one left to stand in his way, and he could finally get on with his life. At least, until the Gods chose a new champion. And by then, you can bet Aku would be ready and waiting for them, talons and tusks bared to rip them to shreds.

Oh yes...

So he was going to do this... Fine... But he couldn't just charge into this blindly like last time. He had to plan every move, every foreseeable outcome and variable. He could no longer afford to leave this up to chance. And so, Aku unlocked his phone and opened his contacts app. He had a few phonecalls to make before it would be time to ascertain the Samurai’s location and initiate the final battle.

Three hours and eighteen minutes had passed since he’d received word Jack had lost his sword.

The forest in which Jack was camped was eerily silent, and very very cold. Overhead, not a cloud stirred in the savage nighttime sky. The world is so dark that even the stars and fingernail moon seemed insignificant and weak as candleflame. Chilly cold wind whistled through the trees, making dead, barren branches rattle together like bones. All around Jack, the landscape is black and foreboding. Black as sin, black as coal, black as creeping death.

Black as Aku’s essence.

The samurai’s tired eyes looked forward into the writhing flames, looking through them without seeing. He brought a hand up to trace the vicious scar which criss-crossed his face, feeling the raised flesh on his forehead, nose, and cheek with battle-hardened, numbed fingers. His blind eye throbbed in its socket, with the memory of those vicious black talons that had swept across his face so many years ago. Jack gave a shuddering sigh, letting his hand fall from his face and back into his lap.

Another breeze whistled through the forest, cutting through the air with a deadly hiss— stirring the kindling he’d used to start the fire this time four hours ago, and casting burning leaves into the underbrush, where they smoldered for an instant and then died away. Jack turned his head to watch them, his expression forlorn and soft at the edges with drunkenness and despair, thinking not of the risk of brush fire but instead of the many lives he’d failed. All those innocents, their lives winking out in the night. Burning bright like sparks. Crying out for help that would never come— crying out that Jack would save them... That they believed in him. That he was only a few minutes away, and oh how sorry Aku would be for this destruction he had wrought. So sorry. So sorry...

The blood of children on their mother’s hands, piercing heart-wrenching screams breaking the night wide open. Broken families crouched in the burning soil of their homes, soot running through their fingers, the hot and oily smell of bodies burning in the night. A banquet of young souls upon which the demon could feast...

In Jack’s other hand, a half-empty flask of vodka sat open and stinking. He pulled deep from it as he watched his dinner cooking over the fire, a young rabbit he’d skinned about an hour ago and field-dressed.

Across the fire, his only company for the past several decades sat cross-legged and complacent as ever, nearer to him now than he’d ever been before. He’d long since stopped attempting to speak to this phantom warrior, and vice versa. Their relationship was one without words, one without camaraderie, or closeness, or even loyalty. It was a bond as old as time— not of love, nor of lust or blood or brotherhood, but of something much older than that. Their’s was a bond of life and death. Jack could recall the first time they’d met, three decades ago, when he’d seen the first child die right in front of him— to an arrow that was meant for him. The unsettling green glow of the phantom samurai stepping between the gaps in the trees, that horrible steed looking upon him with its cold, dead eyes.

But that was so long ago. Now, Jack looked upon him without fear, almost taking unconscious comfort at his presence. Some days it was all he could do to not come to him, ask that which only he could provide. Relief, salvation, freedom from this chain of his own making. Kaishakunin, or the “Second” as some called him, was a nice thing to have around, thought Jack. His presence was grounding, like the knowledge that the Earth was spherical, or that time would continue to plod forward, or that there was still an afterlife waiting— sweet relief from this hell on Earth...

“Well...” said the Second into the horrible, pregnant silence which stretched between them, and Jack started from his drunken thoughts to watch him stand, firelight glinting off his unnaturally glowing armor.

“Tonight we part ways, Samurai,” said the Second softly, and perhaps it was the alcohol in his system but Jack could swear he sounded almost sad at this news. Regretful. Pitying, even.

“Why? Where are you going? What if I... need you?” asked Jack, the pain in his eyes doing much to speak his point. His numbed fingers clenched hard at the neck of the bottle he held in his other hand, bringing it to his lips with a shaking hand, feeling great gouts of alcohol spilling down his beard.

The Second looked upon him for a long few seconds, and where his gaze pricked his skin Jack could swear his soul was burning. Or maybe that was the liquid fire he’d just drank, warming him from inside.

“It is too late, Samurai. Some other Fate has been chosen for you. The Gods all agree you are no longer worthy to bear this weight. Some other will rise in your stead to carry on where you have left off. This is the End of your Journey.” There was a meaningful pause, ghost and man looking upon each other for a long, long time before he forged on.

“For now, sit and drink... Eat some of your rabbit.... Perhaps beg forgiveness of your Gods for your sins of the flesh... But in one hour’s time you will die. It’s over.”

And with that, the Second walked to his steed and pulled its reins to bring the beast to its feet. The demon horse gave a snort as it was saddled and its master climbed upon its back. A brisk kick to its side and together they were off, the demon’s hooves making not a sound as they fled into the darkness.

Jack was left reeling in the sudden silence, standing now as he stared into the thick of the trees, trying to make out the creeping, glowing silhouette of what he had once thought would be his eternal companion. They’d never been very close, but even still, the samurai could not deny the comfort his presence had always brought him. The firm knowledge that if he ever needed an out, ever needed peace, he could have it at a moment’s notice.

He exhaled softly, his breath leaving him in a cloud of vapor, watched after him a moment longer and then sighed, sitting down in front of the fire once again. He reached for the rabbit and lifted its stick out of the heat, picking at its scrawny flesh with tired fingers.

One hour left to live.

There was a time where he would have scorned such an intonement. Let them try, he would have said, to anyone that had it out for him. But now... so cold and alone, in this forest of Despair... with nothing but the wind and ghosts of the damned to keep his company. These old memories. These old scars. These old bones.... The Peace of Oblivion sounded... so nice. Relieving. Comforting... Like a mother’s embrace.

He shut his eyes, tasting nothing as he chewed the bland, malnourished meat. In his mind, the vision of his mother and father rose to greet him, blinding white in the darkness of his failing sanity. They no longer smiled upon him; it had been such a long time since he’d seen them look happy even in his memories. It was always disappointment and hurt on their faces; an unconscious projection of his guilt for having failing them.

Eyes still closed, he brought the flask to his lips and drank from it again, but all this seemed to do to their memory is bring them into clearer focus.

“We’re waiting for you, my son,” said the Emperor’s ghost in his mind, and in the physical world Jack gave a violent shudder, his entire face twisting in heartbroken agony.

“We’re so sorry, Jack,” said the Empress, her voice coming out almost a sob as she knelt to the floor, opening her arms so he could fall into her embrace. Sorry for what, she didn’t specify, even as her hands came up to pet through his coarse hair. In his mind, Jack pressed his face into her shoulder, hiding from her and his father the agony this never-ending journey had caused him. He was supposed to be strong. He was supposed to be unflinching, unyielding... To think he had fallen so far from grace, had forgotten his purpose, had failed them so profoundly, had left them behind to rot.

“It is ok... We are here for you. We are waiting for you. We forgive you,” said the ghost of Jack’s father, kneeling down beside his mother and beside him, pulling both into his strong and capable arms.

For the first time in a long while, the man that once called himself Samurai Jack hung his head and cried.

It had been four hours and six minutes since Aku had learned Jack had lost his sword.

Aku felt more alive than he had in centuries, standing now at the outermost circumference of the forest, only barely concealed by the trees. He breathed in deep the cool, wintry smell of pine needles and wet earth, feeling very much at home surrounded by the dead husks of ancient trees which withered quietly and slowly around him; such a setting called forth his oldest memory, awakening in the withered forest of old, standing with his horns cresting the clouds-- looking upon the first of his many many victims.

Other than the hellish ambiance which so often accompanied him wherever he went, the forest tonight is deadly quiet. Dead, almost. Not even a single creature stirred itself at the sight of him; as if the entire world was holding its breath in the wake of his evil. A terrible dread sits upon the world tonight. Dread of wrongs to come. Dread of death, like the weight that sits in ones stomach staring down the jaws of Oblivion.

Tonight the world is brisk... clear. He could see for miles in every direction, even in this stubborn darkness where even the pale white light of the moon seemed so very insignificant— this world of black which quenched even the stars.

Now that he’s here, he’s actually quite eager to get this thing started. It’s all he can do to hold himself back and not charge headlong into the fray like he so often would do in a situation like this one, faced with a deliciously insurmountable task. There was a time, not so long ago in the grand scheme of things, where such challenges as the one Jack presented were readily abound. Aku could not take even a single step before meeting resistance, either in the form of an elusive prey, or some great lost treasure, or a divine power source just out of reach. But like so many other things in this pitiful, weak little world, one by one they gave in and surrendered to his might like sandcastles before the certainty of a creeping tide.

So why is it that Jack did not fall like so many others? wondered the Great Demon to himself— a claw twisting itself thoughtfully through his beard as he brooded about the best way to proceed.

Could it be that Jack was his very moral compliment? Created by the Gods to thwart his every step, keep him from reaching his former strength? His keeper of sorts? Aku had heard of such a cosmic arrangement before— some great good created to counter some great evil. But Jack was just a mortal man, and HE was a GOD! Aku would be damned if he ever gave into the Samurai’s attempts to thwart him. Like all the others that had come before Jack, so too would the little Samurai have no choice but to surrender...

And Tonight was the night that his every machination would come to fruition...

Before departing the citadel, Aku had made all the necessary arrangements to ensure this monumental task went off without a hitch. He’d been far too kind in his previous attempts, far too sparing with his use of force. He’d let arrogance blind him when he did not treat Jack with the respect such a great foe deserved, and instead greeted his abilities and mortality with scorn and doubt. He could see that now. But with time had come hard-won experience, and tonight there would be no more mercy.

Beetle drones by the thousands... as far as the eye could see surrounded the forest in every direction, teleported there by the barest exertion of will. If Jack made a break for it, he’d be set upon from every direction. There was so many of them would be no cutting their ranks. ( —How did the old saying go? You couldn’t stir ‘em with a stick! ) In addition to these, wasp drones clot the sky in the far distance, waiting for the slightest summons if they should be necessary. Mantroids, too, behind the Beetle drones. And behind the Mantroids, rows and rows and rows of armored vehicles, manned with highly-trained flesh-and-blood barbarians, hungry to rip and tear and maim and maul...

Aku gave a sick grin at the thought of them. They were his kind of people!

And furthermore, before leaving his citadel earlier that evening he’d had the great foresight to sample from a special wine brewed for him by his good friend and fellow God. A wine brewed with the a certain special and incredibly rare ingredient... God’s blood. Ichor, if technical names interest you. Drinking such a wine would render anyone temporarily invincible. Being that Aku was still not quite sure as to the fate of Jack’s sword, he’d partaken of this special treat as a mere precaution. Let Jack try to cut him, if he dared!

Yes... All the pieces were in place... All that’s left was to confront him, rip his life out of his hands and stomp it into the ground. Oh yesss. Like he’d been wanting to for so many long, agonizing years. A breathy chuckle leaves him with this thought, his tongue darting between his teeth to lick at his blunted incisors as might a dog’s. The delicious thought of life’s blood dripping down his chin, running down his throat sends shivers of a strange, carnal sort through his entire body. His breath leaves him in wretched, heaving gasps as he hunkers low to the ground, allowing himself to slip into the comfortable instincts he’d leashed for so SO long...

—and madness fits the Beast like a glove.

His essence congealed like blood, dripping from his person in great gooey ropes; after only a few seconds, there’s none of him left in one piece. All that’s left in his stead is a large black puddle on the ground, drinking in light almost like tar. But then... a bubble. One, then two, then many, and an insectoid leg steps delicately from the black with all the grace of a dancer. Then another leg, and another and another, hundreds of legs in fact step out of the puddle, pulling a hideous, segmented body out of the murk which soon became so long that it had no choice but to back out of the forest. After a long few seconds, when the puddle had almost run dry, the tide of legs and segments slows down, and the first of seven pairs of arms braces itself on dry land to pull its upper body free.

The Beast’s upper body emerged as a wet, dripping abomination the likes of which you’d hope never to see even in the coldest depths of hell. Aku’s face in this form is hideously deformed. The upper half of it looked very much like it usually did, large staring eyes topped with those familiar flaming eyebrows. Hooked human-like nose. But the bottom half is where things got interesting... His jaws jutted from his face almost like goblin sharks, his entire lower jaw almost disconnected from his face his overbite was so pronounced. An impossible number of needle-fine teeth jutted every direction from the monster’s jaw. Large fleshy tongue squatting unpleasantly in his mouth like a salamander. Large clots of saliva oozed between the gaps in his teeth, dripping to the ground in shining ropes which caught the moonlight and sparkled with evil and wrongness.

Yesssssss, thought Aku with a satisfied hiss from his snaggle-toothed jaws, tongue slipping between his teeth looking very much like a gecko. This form would do nicely for the task at hand... He couldn’t help but chuckle lowly again, at first doing all in his power to remain at least a little in hand but as conscious mind at last retreated into the background, allowing the Beast to at last take the helm, his brazen voice peeled forth insanely as he lifted the upper part of his segmented body skyward. He raised his many hands to the sky, and a swirling vortex of clouds choked out what little light was afforded by the moon. The only light in the forest now is what’s cast off by his flaming eyebrows and glowing irises. But that’s fine. He was always a creature of darkness. He lived it, breathed it, created it; it was his element.

And with that, he set forth into the woods— his many hands shoving aside trees indiscriminately, that long segmented body with its many legs tearing huge holes in the Earth.

He came upon the Samurai’s clearing without ceremony; in fact, far more suddenly than he’d at first anticipated. The Beast pushed aside the last of the trees in its way with a heavy crash of felled wood and stood there staring at him for a long, long few seconds. Jack hadn’t even stood to greet him; if anything, he almost seemed to look through him.

Strange, thought the Beast as it scented the air, staring down its prey with blinkered eyes totally dead of feeling. Its prey was unafraid of him. It could not recall the last time it had faced something that could look upon his true form and not run screaming.

“Sam-u-raiiiiiiiiii,” hissed the Beast in a passable imitation of Aku’s voice, though by the flat tone and dead inflection, it’s obvious that it is not really Aku who is speaking.

“Are you not surprised to see me?” the Beast asked sweetly in Aku’s rasping voice, pushing itself into the clearing. One of his many insectoid legs stabbed harshly into the ground behind him, sending up a wet cloud of dirt.

Jack looked upon him for a long long few seconds, seeming to take his sweet time registering who this creature is supposed to be. He even had the sheer audacity to take a sip of his vodka before he tossed the bottle aside and shoved himself to stand, a little wobbly on his feet. The look on his face is sober enough in its misery, though he seems to be having a hard time indeed standing still; looking very much like someone who didn’t have their sea legs.

Another few seconds as he attempted to grasp what he was looking at, and then he spoke.

“What form is this, Aku?” he asked softly, that old voice rasping from disuse and sorrow.

“Do you like it?” asked the Beast at once, favoring him a warped grin as he stepped closer, all seven pairs of hands poised like a spider descending from its web. The upper half of the Beast’s body remains lifted off the ground as it circles him, its cold, dead eyes never leaving Jack’s face. Perhaps if Aku were present right now, he’d register with no little sense of surprise that the sword was indeed gone, or indeed that Jack was in a state of undress that was almost indecent. Only the most modest of rags covered him. Scrapes and cuts and bruises cover his arms and legs as if he’d pushed through a bramble patch earlier that day. No doubt the result of another close brush with Aku’s law.

Jack watched back, too drunk and too tired and too hurt to do much else except stare death right in the face.

“Yes. It suits you...” said Jack softly and sincerely, stepping daringly closer into striking distance.

The Beast lowered itself to look at Jack a bit more closely, its rancid breath blasting across the Samurai’s face. Jack looked back into those cold, dead inhuman eyes, feeling nothing. No fear. No regret. No pain. Just peace.

“Do you fear death, little Samurai?” asked the Beast, leaning closer. So close now that its jaws have almost closed over Jack’s face.

Jack looked down its throat.

“No. I welcome it,” he said.

“Then who am I to deny you that which you so desire,” said the Beast in a soft hiss, reaching for him with its many forelimbs and pulling him into what might have looked like a lover’s embrace. There’s a wet sound as its jaws closed over Jacks head and neck, a sound like wet tissue being shredded as the creature gave a gentle shake of its head, and a great gout of life’s blood paints the creature’s upper chest. After a few seconds savoring the taste of the samurai’s blood, the creature’s jaws fell open, dropping his head into the dirt where it rolled a ways and finally lay still. The creature’s claws gripped into the body, seemingly holding it for lack of a better thing to do.

It stood there for a very long time, just holding onto the body, looking upon it, digging its claws into its dead flesh, struggling to comprehend what the fuck just happened. That wasn’t quite the fight he’d had in mind when he left the citadel earlier this evening. He’d expected a much more eventful encounter than that. To think that Jack would just surrender himself to death like that, walk himself right into his jaws, it’s-- it’s impossible. Improbable.

But--

A low chuckle escapes him. Then a louder one. And finally he’s standing there in the dead forest absolutely doubled over with insane laughter. Indescribable joy the likes of which he’d never before experienced washed over him in a delirious wave, Jack’s blood dripping from his open mouth.

It had been six hours since Aku had learned Jack had lost his sword.

#◜EVENT: Darkness Falls◞#◜悪◞#◜V1: Bad End◞#sonxflight #nightmaresindreamland #alcoholism tw #alcohol tw #//for those of you wondering this is my Jack muse that I keep mentioning in passing!#gore tw #blood tw #death tw #mutilation tw #mauling tw #◜♚◞#suicidal thoughts tw #suicide mention #suicide tw #//really upsetting stuff folks.#//don't read it you're easily triggered

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tumblunni · 6 years ago

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Okay I know that kingdom hearts has a bad reputation for sticking crucial plot information on obscure spinoff games but HOLY SHIT I just finally watched a lets play of the fuckin digimon tcg game and found out it ACTUALLY HAS A GODDAMN CONCLUSION TO ANALOGMAN FROM DIGIMON WORLD 1

like 90% of the damn game has no plot whatsoever let alone indicating its a digimon world sequel! and then suddenly in the last battle without being foreshadowed whatsoever analogman returns and gets possibly the best boss battle ever IN A GODDAMN TCG GAME

holy shit his whole fight is framed as ‘this is literally the same guy from digimon world 1, hacking another game’, the interface wigs out and a bunch of fake command windows pop up with rapidly scrolling code of the game supposedly falling apart. And then his boss battle flips the entire gameplay system on its head by giving him fourth wall breaking special moves that pull overpowered effects by “hacking the engine”, with cool animations to fit. Fuckin badasssss!!

and it also fuckin FINALLY EXPLAINS THE DAMN PLOT LIKE GEEZ

digimon world’s conclusion was so rushed, you never even meet the villain until the final battle and it ends all weird with just “something” going wrong that causes him to get sucked into a portal or something while screaming dramatically in weirdly high resolution terror faces??? the tcg game confirms that this was him attempting to flee back to the human world after you defeated him, but one of the stray attacks from the battle damaged his machine and it caused him to essentially commit accidental suicide when he turned it on.

and HOLY SHIT MY FUCKIN OBSCURE HEADCANON IS TRUE????

the game had some sequel bait hints that maybe analogman is somehow still around and that the portal explosion just turned him into “corrupted data” so he can never return to the human world. and i always thought it would be super ironic if he actually got turned into a digimon aka the thing he hates more than anything

WELL OKAY I GUESS CRITICAL LORE IN A TCG GAME IS OKAY WHEN ITS A BIG YES BUNNI U THEORY BE CORRECT

he appears in this game as a malomyotismon who does a damn good vexen face during the fight, lol. And he’s all “gahh that stupid kid ruined my plans but this accursed body at least improved my hacking abilities!” Tho its implied that his corrupted state is more like a bodyless cloud of data that can possess/copy different digimon, which would be REALLY FUCKIN CRITICAL to explaining the goddamn plot of Digimon World Next Order!

Seriously wtf is up with this series? Digimon World 2 is not the sequel to Digimon World 1, all the numbered games are entirely separate individual stories with wildly different genres from pet sim to roguelike strategy. The real sequel is fucking DIGIMON THE CARD GAME THE GAME and then Digimon World Next Order a bazillion years later for the ps4. In which i am STILL REALLY SALTY that they have a FUCKIN RAD remix of analogman’s boss theme yet he doesn’t appear in the game. The added context of this damn tcg game confirms once and for all that the Ambiguous As Fuck Ending actually WAS him appearing in the game, this unexplained “oh wait the villain was good all along and he was just possessed by an evil virus” was supposed to be corrupted-digi-analogman and seriously WHY DONT THEY JUST FUCKIN EXPLAIN IT!!! this tcg game wasnt even released in europe!! and even american fans probably had no clue it was linked to this entirely separate subseries! You have to friggin piece it together with context clues like the battle music and the fact analogman’s signature mon was machinedramon. I mean vjesus christ Next Order is a litera; sequel with the grown up version of Digimon World’s protagonist as a badass home ec teacher who still defends the digital world in his free time yet you couldnt spare ONE LINE OF DIALOGUE mentioning the name of the villain?? and summarizing the fuckin tcg game everyone missed??? AND CONFIRMING THAT THE VILLAIN IS INDEED MAKING A REAPPEARANCE POSSESSING THIS GUY??? oh god everything makes SENSE, thank you terrible card game adaptation. ehh but i do still love Next Order for making Hiro/Mameo’s canon partner Mamemon, he’s even more badass as this big tough bishie version of himself with a tiny adorable pal that can shoot rocket fists through space and time. (its funny tho cos the DW1 intro movie showed metalmamemon and metalgreymon and the american boxart flipped a coin and decided metalgreymon must have been the one the protagonist was using in that scene. Whoops!)

anyway even with the added context that IT WAS INDEED GODDAMN ANALOGMAN, the final boss fight in Next Order was as terrible as the rest of the plot. So I’m glad trash gramps got a suitably badass boss fight after all, even if it was a CARD GAME VERSION! lets all celebrate the awesomeness of this obscure fuckin spinoff game’s obscure fuckin intercontinuity cameo with the boss fight music that other game wasted

youtube

seriously fuckin hell the biggest challenge in that final boss was that i was so distracted by SHEER OFFENDEDNESS at the cool music not matching it that it was hard to keep focused

its not just a great boss theme for a terrible boss, its a really fuckin EMOTIONAL song for anyone whose childhood was fuckin defined by the first game!!!

and look you had a PERFECT FUCKIN EXCUSE for a REALLY GOOD boss battle against MY MAN GRUMPY GRANDPA OF THE COOL DAMN NAME. Seriously guys analogman was THE FIRST digimon villain! digimon world came out before the anime, digimon world was the BETA FOR THE ANIME! this was the first place they had the ideas for file island, so much of the areas in the game are awkwardly mistranslated versions of stuff that would later appear in the anime in a different form. before this digimon had never been anything more than a fuckin 2-bit graphics tamagotchi and this was (after the manga) only the second goddamn time these monsters had an actual full colour character design! all of those charmingly janky 90s gross out show styled tcg illustrations? that was concept art that this game was working from! fuckin hell this game thought up the idea for metalgreymon’s changed design that ended up becoming the iconic partner of tai in the anime. (you can also see beta tai in the manga with a beta veemon as a partner instead! o_O)

SO LIKE...

JUST....

I HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT ANALOGMAN OKAY!!! he’s a badly written guy with only like five sentences across all the videogames but fuckin hell he was such an Iconique part of the development of this series that they named him fucking ANALOGMAN

like dude you could have SO EASILY made me scream at my tv in a more positive way by bringing him out as the surprise villain and showing us wtf his deisgn is even supposed to look like cos god all we have is a blurry faceless early ps1 model buried under the glow filters of Mt Infinity’s funky background effects.

AND FUCKING

IF IT IS CANON

THAT MY FUCKIN

STUPID THEORY

IS CANON

slap a fuckin O on this man and LITERALLY LET ME BEAT HIM UP

like dont even give him a team or anything, just let me fight THE MAN HIMSELF

you canonically fuckin said he’s a digital ghost now and basically the same as a digimon

let me beat the shit out of a regular businessman in a suit and tie while he pulls his badass ‘i’m hacking the game i’m in’ bullshit from the GODDAMN TCG GAME THAT WAS MORE CLIMACTIC THAN YOUR SHITTY CASH GRAB FAKE SEQUEL

man god i didnt expect a fuckin TCG GAME to revive my righteous fury from back when i first played that piece of shit. i hate it cos Next order is so pretty and its gameplay is so good and i really loved my twin digis but there were SO MANY bugs and cut corners and missing content and really bad writing and GOD it made me so sad that the dub team really really tried, they tried so hard that they got fuckin renamon’s original voice actress back even though the renamon in this game has nothing to do with the anime one. THE DUB WAS REALLY GOOD BUT IT COULDNT SALVAGE THAT SCRIPT!! THE MUSIC WAS REALLY GOOD AND THE ART WAS REALLY GOOD AND THE DIGIMON THEMSELVES WERE MY BEST DAMN FRIENDS FOR THAT MONTH OF MY LIFE BUT THE GODDAMN FUCKIN SCRIPT!!! the postgame was MORE FUN because FINALLY everything opened up like the sandbox of the first game and you could just fuckin hug u digis without being distracted by constant cutscenes butchering your childhood nostalgia

man i wanted to write a fic/draw a comic about my headcanons on how to fix it but i never managed to do it cos holy shit it was basically “throw everything out and make a different game geez” I COULD RAMBLE FOR HOURS ABOUT THE ENTIRELY DIFFERENT SEQUEL THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN!! and a fuckin!! tcg game!! was closer to that sequel!!!

and fuckin MY THEORY WAS RIGHT AND MY BETTER GAME IDEA ACTUALLY WOULD WORK IN CANON

fuck it im gonna do draw myself decking business gramps in the face

oh! and the female protagonist design! thats another rare good part of that thing! i loved the pixellization effect on her ponytal, way better than the male equivelant having a very ordinary costume design just with a pixel corner taken out of his jacket. also why did the plot never actually make a thing out of that? like you’d think that ‘unlike every other digimon tamer i’ve got this scar of my digitization’ would be a plot point. like they didnt give everyone else a cool pixel squares mark! they could have at least used it as an excuse why the protagonist is the Only Chosen One who can do all this plot shit. or if it was me i would have made it early foreshadowing for the Return Of Business Gramps, like you were partially infected by the Oooo Mysterious Unexplained Digi Virus (seriously why did they not just have ONE SENTENCE explaining its the fuckin original villain returning????) during the prologue and i dunno somehow that gives you powers to break analogman’s control on the digimon he possesses. or maybe the pixel thing is like a tracking device he put on you? or just give that cool design trait to the protagonist of digimon cyber sleuth instead, whose entire plot is that theyre a digimon human hybrid with literaly the power to pixellize themself into computers.

ALSO!!! actually do something!!! with mameo!!!

they really fuckin hyped up in all the prelease materials that the digimon world 1 protagonist was gonna be in this game and he’s all grown up now. and then he does NOTHING in the plot except babble exposition and stand around your home base. and has one line about how he’s a badass teacher now and his partner is mamemon but hey we made a bullshit excuse for why his digimon is sealed away and he never gets to fight :<

give me an actual cool teamup of new protag girl and her cool teacher dude beating the shit out of business trash with their bare fists and also their digimon’s bare fists while THE BEST DAMN MUSIC GOES UNWASTED

...fuck i sure do Feel Intensely about nostalgic games lol. i wonder if i’ll be so rambley when i play kh3? maybe itd be a really shitty lp, aaagh...

#no gramps shall go unappreciated in the bunni house

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nyrator · 7 years ago

Text

OKAY

ONEGAI MY MELODY SEASON ONE REVIEW

where do I even start...

also, this guy. The greatest character in the show:

this show is very suki suki suu, fuwa fuwa fuu, and read on to see me rant about the entirety of season one the only way I know how, obsessing over Hiiragi and how much of a lovable douchebag he is

okay so like

this show is basically “oh man there’s My Melody the cute little Sanrio bunny in Mariland having a good time, until her dark edgy rival Kuromi breaks out of jail on a tapir named Baku after stealing a magic Melody Key and Bow, breaks into the human world to summon the dark power with it to extract her revenge on My Melody for being so... her.”

So like the Key has the power to make human dreams come true but into nightmares instead, kind of like a monkey paw thing but more ridiculous. There’s also this violin bow that helps power it up. What they don’t know is, get a 100 black notes by making nightmares come true, and human dreams will be completely erased, and Mariland which is built on human dreams, will be erased as well. So My Melody is chosen to wield the Melody Takt and stop her (aka accused of helping Kuromi escape because Kuromi jumped off her head and she did nothing to stop her), to use it to fight the nightmare magic (by possessing something cute with a sticker) to try to get 100 pink notes before Kuromi gets 100 black notes. There’s also a Melody Candy to reward whatever she used to possess to turn it back to normal, and a Melody Box to hold the Pink Notes in (Baku just eats Black Notes).

so like the first episode is all introductions and probably the weakest one, you got main girl Uta and her friend Miki (who later turns out to be this lovey-dovey poet) in violin class fawning over Mr. Perfect Beautiful Genius: Hiiragi-senpai. Kuromi comes, messes with her, ruins her violin performance, but My Melo saves the day and ends up living with her. You also got Mana, the fiesty red head sports girl who’s terrified of anything cute, Uta’s older and younger sister who hate her terrible violin playing, and eventually more as well as a few more Sanrio characters.

Anyway so yeah, this douche right here. He’s all like “oh you did wonderful” to Uta at the end of the episode and she’s all “hooray!” and then he says the same thing to everyone else and it’s like “haha wow this guy”

BUT THEN EPISODE 2 HAPPENS

KUROMI GOES AFTER THIS GUY RIGHT AND HE’S COMPLETELY UNPHASED BY THIS MAGICAL ORDEAL

AND THEN SEES SHE HAS A BOW, STEALS IT FROM HER, AND IS NOW ITS NEW MASTER (it extends and everything and refuses to go back to Kuromi)

so now he just plays the violin with it and just powers up Kuromi’s key for nightmare magic just because

and so now they just go and grant human dreams with the Key and whoever they unlock with it gets to see a naked Hiiragi just playing the violin for a few seconds

so yeah usually crazy things happen (like this kid had failing grades and wished to be able to study better and so he became a super computer that can attack the classroom by typing and yeah, then he got bitten in the groin by a mouse possessed by My Melo and died, then got rebooted by local boy Kakeru out of pity, then finally with the trademark “Onegai, ___-san” from My Melo, the mouse gets powered up and chews through his power cord and thus ending his dream and giving them a pink note because he realized studying is something you have to take seriously

AND LIKE

IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER

there’s a little bit of continuity in each episode like, lots of callbacks and stuff

there’s the rare My Sweet Piano aka the cute pink sheep who randomly appears once every few episodes (usually in the background in a Mariland scene), and all she does is go “aaaa baa, mehh!” and it is adorable and she is adorable and the best character (she gets a little more screentime as the show goes on to become a master poet with Miki, but she’s usually the unexpected “oh she’s just here now character”)

you got the basic love triangle of “Uta and Miki love Hiiragi (though Miki eventually allows Uta to chase after the Hiiragi bowl), Kakeru slowly loves Uta and by anime law is like destined for her because they’re perfect for each other, and Hiiragi just loves himself

EXCEPT HE EVENTUALLY LOVES UTA AND IT’S LIKE AAA I WANT HIIRAGI TO WIN THE UTA BOWL SCREW YOU KAKERU

but man

let me try to explain to you just how great Hiiragi is

like all he does most of the time is just dramatically play the violin in the dark, usually in some male-model outfit with his chest exposed, then like, okay, My Melody keeps screwing things up, hey this girl Miki is holding My Melody, let me get close to her so I can steal the Melody Takt

so he’s all like “hey baby can I sit next to you”

and Miki’s like “O-ojii-sama!”

and Hiiragi’s like “what”

and meanwhile he just

CASUALLY TOSSES MY MELO ASIDE

LIKE WOW WHAT A DOUCHE WHO WOULD DO THAT TO MY MELO

AND HE JUST GRINS AFTERWARDS AND IS LIKE “hey Miki wanna come over to my place after school” and she’s like “YES”

and so the great split between Uta and Miki begins when it’s like “wait we both love the same guy how could you” and then Uta hates Miki until it’s like “oh wait Miki asked if she could bring Uta with her” and she’s all crying because Uta doesn’t show up and Hiiragi’s all flirt and then like “blast, she didn’t bring My Melody, what the hell”

then Kuromi out of jealousy activates her dream and BAKU IS JUST THROWN IN THERE TO CENSOR THE HIIRAGI

baku I love you so much

and so like an army of Baku Hiiragis chase after her until Uta and My Melo come up to save the day and restore their friendship with this, the drawing Miki drew of Hiiragi as he played the violin

anyway so that was like episode 7

also whenever Kuromi succeeds at getting a black note or whatever Hiiragi will use his charms and flirt with her and she also becomes one of his fangirls

also eventually he saves My Melody from a cat and worms his way in and is all like “hey I’m perceptive of course I know you’re a living thing” and his explanation is “why aren’t you surprised about My Melo?” “why aren’t you surprised about humans?” “Oh, I see!”

and so he uses this to flirt with her like

“oh hey was that you playing the violin just now” “yeah” “oh wow we have a problem then” “...ehh” then it swiftly turns into like “hey there’s an art exhibit today, come with me on a date so I can teach you better”

this guy man what a player

then the plot of this song of Uta’s, where her singing it powers up the Takt and saves My Melo from being kidnapped (also seriously look at that top what a freaking player), then after it fails he gives her a business card with his phone number/email, what a player

OH MAN AND EPISODE 16 IS A FANTASTIC EPISODE OF WONDERS

first off this guy knows how to dress

so like this lady was in love with her teacher but she’s going overseas (and also she has a sweet car) and Kuromi and Baku sympathize with her ordeal and they’re like “we’re here to help” and so Kuromi gives her a magic cell phone

AND SO SHE SUMMONS HIM WITH IT RIGHT

AND OF COURSE IT’S FREAKING HIIRAGI

THIS BUSINESS WOMAN IS IN LOVE WITH A HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT WHO HAPPENS TO HAVE BEEN GETTING DRESSED TO GO ON A DATE WITH UTA, AND MANNN THIS WAS SO PERFECT

AND HE JUST GETS SO PISSED OFF

so yeah Kuromi goes and begs Uta to save Hiiragi before she gets to the church

ALSO HIIRAGI’S REASONING FOR NOT ANSWERING HER CALLS

also

“no way”

and okay so like

they’re at the church and trying to stop it and so My Melo possesses the phone (and we’re like “how the heck did she possess the phone that’s like possessing the villain itself what the heck”) but the Mana kicked it and broke it and laser beams and everyone’s phone got corrupted

AND SO IT’S JUST A MADHOUSE OF CHAOS OF EVERYONE TRYING TO KISS EACH OTHER (AND HIIRAGI TRYING TO KISS BAKU...)

ALSO THERE’S THIS HEDGEHOG-KUN WHO’S LIKE, just this fourth wall breaking character with the power to turn back time whenever a dream is over to erase everyone’s memories, but like, mannn. Thanks hedgehog-kun.

but yeah so My Melo uses the Takt twice in one dream and bam saves the day right before everyone kisses each other and then

what a freaking ladies man (also it was a black note)

THEN HE JUST THREATENS TO BURN KUROMI’S NOTEBOOK HER PRIZED POSSESSION FILLED WITH ALL THE 6666 TIMES MY MELO SLIGHTED HER, goddddd, this douche, he’s such a douche

AND THAT WAS ALL LIKE ONE EPISODE OF WONDERS AND BEAUTY AND WE’RE NOT EVEN A THIRD OF THE WAY DONE WITH THE SERIES

anyway more Hiiragi moments

“oh man what if Hiiragi appears and this is just his beach home”

wait no, I say, there’s no way

YEP, IN FISHNET TOP NO LESS

so then he invites Uta to watch a meteor shower where lovers who watch together are bound together forever but zombie dreams happen and Uta has to cancel because the accursed Kakeru got in the way saying her and getting injured

then just stunned silence of Hiiragi just being stood up after waiting all night

THEN BAKU BEING THE BEST and then being destroyed by Hiiragi.

so yeah

let’s not forget this show also has classic Kuromi vision

also the dad who’s one of the few who’s unaware of My Melo being an actual character and not a stuffed doll (eventually like everyone knows though including him)

and at the halfway point of the series I was like “come onnn plot things happen” and nothing happened UNTIL THE VERY END/BEGINNING OF NEXT EPISODE WHERE HIIRAGI SEES THE BLACK NOTES AND CAN PLAY HALF THE SONG THEY MAKE AND IS ENTRANCED BY IT and so Kuromi is powered up and unstoppable

also as you can tell it was a fantastic episode

a fantastic episode (not even My Melo could beat it, I was like, “wait are we going to have Fist of the North Hiiragi a reoccuring thing now” but no dreams go away on their own anyway even without My Melo and that made me a bit sad

ALSO THERE’S THIS MUSIC TEACHER RIGHT AND HE’S GREAT

and he wishes Hiiragi would stop being a douche and become a little kid again

and I was like YEAH SHOUTA HIIRAGI WOOOO HECK YES MY DREAM EPISODE GIVE ME WHAT HE WAS LIKE AS A KID GIVE ME HIS TRAGIC BACKSTORY

but he FOUGHT IT OFF

HE FOUGHT OFF DREAM MAGIC

BY THINKING OF HIS WORST MEMORY

and just goes back to reading his book like nothing happened

what a freaking tease

(but the magic rebound and turned EVERYONE ELSE into little kids instead)

also yeah eventually Hiiragi learns Kuromi has a weakness (stepping on her tail) and so wants to know what My Melo’s weakness is (Uta conveniently discovered it was tugging her ears) and so more date time

and eventually they go to dinner and he plays her mom’s song and then just casually goes “so, My Melo has a weakness?” “Huh, oh yeah, her ears, yeah” but at the same time Uta’s like “so why date me” and suddenly Hiiragi’s like, overwhelmed by scenes of Uta and is like “wait what was that” and it’s like OH MAN HE’S GETTING GENUINE FEELINGS FOR HER

EVEN THIS SCENE IS LIKE ONE OF HIS FONDEST MEMORIES OF HER, thanks fortune teller episode

then on Uta’s birthday when no one shows up he’s there to like, give her the perfect birthday, but when she wants to go home he obliges and then sees her family and her dad and is like SUCH A DOUCHE TO HER DAD AND HE LEAVES WOW HE JUST GLARES AT HIM

also the dream episode where like the stars align and it’s Baku’s time to shine by doing dream things so he summons Hiiragi to enter his dream

and Hiiragi’s dreams end up just being a void of trash bags and child him just throws everyone away as garbage but one of his dreams is like a galaxy and so the Sanrio characters nearly destroy the galaxy

ALSO PIANO IS THE GREATEST

then there was the movie episode where of course Hiiragi is the one who greenlights it or not

AND HE’S LIKE “gasp it’s Uta in a swimsuit”

then dad saving the day to protect his daughter’s innocence and Hiiragi is so burned

AND THE FREAKING

CHRISTMAS

EPISODE

where it’s all emotional and Koto (the little sister) just wants to meet her mom one time for Christmas and so My Melody and Kuromi team up for once to make it happen and Santa’s here to help

and so they do their normal summoning things at the same time

and I was like “wait what about hiiragi shirtless violin-”

SHIRTLESS SANTA

PLAYING VIOLIN

AND WINKING AT US

ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC 20/10 I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH

then the random quiz show new years episode

the

ultimate

tease

also when they all want to go home to Mariland for New Years once the show begins for real, and Hiiragi’s like, “well, fine, but I’m going to the Caribbean” just to spite them, goddd

also the episode where Hiiragi suddenly has a rival but Hiiragi’s too good (also two crazy fangirls)

and so everyone just starts fighting and Hiiragi just has a violin duel

and these two have a poetry battle

ALSO THESE TWO

THEY ARE NUTS

LIKE LEGIT GENUINE INSANE

“oh man the guy we like is in love with Uta”

“LET’S CLAW HER TO SHREDS”

LIKE JESUS THEY WERE GOING TO LEGIT CLAW HER TO SHREDS THESE ARE HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS JEALOUS OF A MIDDLE SCHOOLER LIKE JESUS CHRIST

also yeah Hiiragi saving the day for his one true love he genuinely has feelings for her HE’D SACRIFICE HIS VIOLIN HAND FOR HER

like I know how these animes work and Kakeru is definitely meant for Uta but

GOD I SUPPORTED THIS SHIP SO MUCH

then just a cutaway to My Sweet Piano just, jumping over a fence. To put Flat-kun asleep, so he can be used by My Melo’s Takt magic thing.

ALSO PLOT THINGS

HE KNOWS

HE KNOWS HIS SECRET

but Hiiragi manages to talk his way out of it “yes, it’s true... they wanted to grant my dream of winning this upcoming concert, but I said no...”

of course because of this the dark power leaves Hiiragi and some other guy wins the concert due to playing the dark power song and Hiiragi has a breakdown

AND BURNS BAKU’S NOTE LIKE WHAT THE HELL YOU DOUCHEBAG BAKU DID NOTHING WRONG

almost burnt Kuromi’s too but didn’t

and like no one can break him from this slump because they all think he’s sad he lost

but then Uta understands and he’s like, god the love between the two, he’s just shocked, goes to touch her face...

I love you Hiiragi

JUST FOR NO REASON

STRETCHES OUT HER FACE BECAUSE THAT’S HOW HE THINKS OF HER LONGINGLY

adadjkf

but then like, he tells her of how he has no hopes and dreams, how he found something that stopped him from throwing his violin into the river, but now that’s gone, and now Uta’s there to help him... then Kakeru ruins everything by breaking in and trying to tell her he’s working for Kuromi, and thus Kakeru friendship ruined

ANYWAY SO YEAH LIKE

the dark power possesses Baku and is like completely ignored because it’s Baku

but it’s like “choose dark power or Uta”

and finally he chooses dark power and so Kuromi goes back to Mariland, steals the Violin she forgot, Hiiragi becomes the dark power

LOOK AT THAT EDGE

and apparently to break Uta’s bond with My Melo he just has to kiss her so he stages this thing up and just bam appears out of nowhere with her and goes to kiss her (after publicly making some other guy’s nightmare come true) and then everyone’s like “no he’s evil”

just

then Mana goes off to fight him and like

DARK EDGE LORD FUR COAT AND EVERYTHING

so then the rest of Uta’s gang goes to confront him, including the little sister who bites him AND HE JUST TOSSES HER AWAY

then they’re all like wow you’re a douche and then he just freaking

electrocutes everyone

then Uta comes and stops him and they give this big thing on how he’ll destroy the world and what dreams mean to each one of them

then

just electrocutes them WITH Uta

OH MAN AND THEN THE NEXT EPISODE

My Melody just calls him and asks to visit and he’s like “whatever” and she’s like “can I bring a present”

and she’s like “ah yes, a Melody tart, I will bake him one”

and then My Melody ends up in jail after a series of events

what an episode

this freaking show

this freaking douche

also like

when Baku leaves because Hiiragi is a douche and his family’s house got destroyed from the dark power so he lives with Uta again and discovers Hiiragi’s going to destroy the world

then finally gets invited back after Baku’s family thwarts his efforts

and this rich jerk who owns the world just gives them this shoddy shack for all of them to live in

WHAT A DOUCHE

then when they get their 100th note Baku steals Kuromi away and refuses to return to Hiiragi and tells her how the world will be destroyed

and Hiiragi just

CAN FLY AND TELEPORT NOW

this

guy

anyway so then we get to the final three episodes

just walks to a radio tower and just, pulls the bow from his shirt

and I’m like “god he’s not wearing anything underneath, I swear to god if he plays the violin shirtless-”

THIS FREAKING GUY

anyway so the world goes into chaos and every single from from past episodes returns (or at least over half of them, a really nice throwback), everyone’s nightmares are back basically

Hedgehog-kun did his best to reverse time

and so Uta and Kuromi are both on a journey to stop him and finally they grant Uta’s dream of seeing Hiirag’s dream and find out he’s in love with her but buried it away (with a nice little panel of his love for Kuromi too)

then at the last moment after blasting her away, he realizes and breaks free from the dark power violin playing and saves her and she gets her 100th pink note

but then the dark power takes over his body and her and My Melo go plummeting to their death

except saved by dad and Mana and not Kakeru

then we go full on JRPG evil Hiiragi, look at him

THEN HE GROWS WINGS AND BECOMES FULL ON JRPG FINAL BOSS

then Baku

prays to the eggplant gods

becomes super saiyan eggplant

and goes beam war against Dar-chan

and then dies (rip Baku, too good for this world)

ALSO LIKE THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE SERIES RIGHT THERE’S UTA IN THIS COW GIRL SINGER OUTFIT IN THE OPENING RIGHT

so I’ve been waiting for it to appear in the show proper

and finally transformation sequence

and

IT’S NOT THE OUTFIT

I FEEL SO BETRAYED

also Baku’s back and then he saves Kuromi from the darkness but dies for real

LOOK AT THAT HOLLOW SHELL OF ASH LEFT BEHIND..

RIP BAKU TOO PURE FOR THIS WORLD

oh thank god

anyway so the problem is the Takt is too strong for My Melo to use now

so the queen puts her into hyperbolic time chamber mode and for a year trains her to wield it

AND A YEAR PASSED IN THE REAL WORLD TOO SO IT’S ALREADY DESTROYED

THEN CREDITS

then NOT CREDITS

and the Queen fixes time so they go back in time back to when they started training

yeah

now My Melody is the Wind Waker of godlike swinging power

THEN LAST EPISODE

a crazy battle of J-Pop versus erratic violin playing and crazy dancing and My Sweet Piano just jamming

also did I mention that I sang the opening with my friend every episode and now they want me to sing for real

also that My Melody gets two powerup magical phrases throughout the series- Onegai, Motto Onegai, and Motto Motto Onegai. So saying Pretty Please pretty much powers up her Takt, I love it.

so yeah the world is dying and Mariland is gone and everyone but the main cast are gone/dreamless and they made sure to show Australia dying first, then NASA, then Japan, thanks Australia

so they finally break through and My Melo connects to Hiiragi in the darkness

and he’s like “are you not going to attack me” “... attack?” “... nevermind, sure, I’ll sing, why not” EXCEPT HE DOESN’T SING AT ALL I WAS PROMISED SINGING HE JUST AIR PLAYS THE VIOLIN

AND THEN TO RESIST THE DARK POWER AND AIR PLAY THE VIOLIN IN THE DARKNESS

HIIRAGI THINKS BACK

TAKES CONTROL OF HIS BODY AND SCREAMS WHILE PLAYING THE INVISIBLE VIOLIN

WITH MY SWEET PIANO JUST ON HIS SHOULDER BAAING FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER

SHE’S JUST THERE

FOR NO REASON

MY FAVORITE TWO CHARACTERS

UNITED AT LAST

WORLD SAVED, MY MELO’S SINGING THE FIRST ENDING SONG JUST LIKE I HOPED, FANTASTIC

then dark angel Hiiragi just holding Uta

turning back to normal

and the day is saved

THIS

GUY

also thank you Melody Mama for being all “not so fast cliched anime man, walking away with a single sorry ain’t gonna cut it”

and then the city explodes

into hotsprings

all the chaos just made hotsprings

so now Hiiragi (and Kuromi/Baku) have to work washing people at the hotsprings

also thank you pun dad

thank you mama and the queen

then Hedgehog returned after being zapped earlier by the dark power

THEN THE HOOK FOR SEASON 2, NEW VILLAIN(?) FROM ENGLAND WITH A GUITAR(?)

so yeah

that’s just

me reliving hiiragi

and just a basic taste of what this show is like

also there are many more lovable characters like Baku, also the dad:

god episode 11 was just the beginning of making My Melo suffer

also have a Flat-kun too

and of course, My Sweet Piano:

#nyrator watches anime #onegai my melody #my melody #sanrio #anime #long post #10/10 fantastic anime thank you kresna for watching it with me #three more seasons to go... how will I survive without douche villain hiiragi...

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bookishnewt · 3 years ago

Text

I seriously love this!

Just imagining Sasha forcibly carrying Marcy back to the car/house to continue the game.

Also perhaps either

a) a frobo being called out of the board game and attacking one of the group cause they rolled it. I can see it being Anne cause of season3a

b) Grime being called out but more as a companion than an enemy. Although Grime being called out on Sasha’s roll and is hunting her down does provide some extra angst cause she befriended the toad while stuck in the board game.

Also Sprig or Polly getting turned into a frog cause they tried cheating to reach the end.

Jumanji AU

“Jumanji is a magical game that able to send players into its jungle-like alternate reality or to send the dangers of said reality into the real world"

making this au together with @kaseyskat

summary and designs

Sprig and Polly started game again

barely fighting off the mantis that appeared after Sprig’s turn, Anne makes her second roll but must retreat with Plantars to other room, until strange figure appears and attacks the mantis

after reunion with Anne, not so happy reunion with Marcy but they need her to finish the game, so they drag her from all the way back from other town’s library

#accursed plot bunnies in my head now #amphibia #amphibia au #anne boonchuy #marcy wu #sasha waybright #sprig plantar #polly plantar #jumanji au

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zaheela · 7 years ago

Text

You know when you have a plot bunny...

And you think it’s a great idea, but when you finally finish it, you kinda feel it’s half baked? Yeah, it’s one of those. I blame my love of the Ancient Magus' Bride series and a random idea. *sighs*

Isabella was the only one left, locked away behind her dreams and trapped in her broken body. In that hospital bed, she looked frail and breakable, a far cry from the stubborn woman he had fallen for, engulfed in sterile sheets. Ashton wasn’t in a better state, having lost both Rebecca and Zach to the fucking curse, and he desperately needed Isabella to wake up. It didn’t matter to him if she took months, even years, he just needed to see her eyes open again. He needed another chance to at least protect her, to redeem himself and somehow survive the crushing guilt on his shoulders. So when he saw a stranger standing by her bedside, his hackles rose. With his silvery hair and sickly hazel eyes, there was no way this man was related to her, and the way he looked at her reminded him of a jackal eyeing a wounded doe. He made sure the man knew the back the hell away as he entered. The stranger gave him a smile that made his skin crawl, before he had the gall to pat her on the wrist.

“Pardon the intrusion, I just had some business with this young lady that couldn’t wait.” His words push Ashton even more on guard, moving closer as if to physically block him. The man just impassively looked at him over the rims of his glasses, before giving him another one of those smiles. It made his fist clench, barely suppressing the need to punch him in his smug face. “After all, it’s not often you find one trapped by a spirit this twisted.”

“Wait what?” The words tumbled out, his mind racing as the memories of that horrible week rushed back. His eyes darted down to Isabella’s prone form. What did he mean by trapped. The man nodded, before pulling out a blood red stone, holding it up and the walls of the hospital room shifted black, the screams that haunted his dreams ringing through the walls. But now he saw Isabella, hovering over her own body, hands clasped over her ears.

“Someone, anyone. Please. Please just make it stop! I don’t want this!” Her words shook him to the core, watching her refuse to open her ghostly eyes. As sudden as the room had turned, it regained its normal sterile look as stranger pulled the stone away.

“Curses are rather sticky things, I don’t know how she managed to wriggle out of this one, but I must applaud her efforts for clinging to life. That being said, I think it’s time to wake the poor princess up, but it’ll be difficult for me to do it alone.” His words still made his skin crawl, but it also held a sickly sweet tone now, like some sort of drug. The man continued on, as if he hadn’t noticed that his words hit home. He placed the clear stone under her pillow, and instantly her face seemed to relax.

“You see, I am something of an expert when it comes to these things, but it also means that they are wise to my tricks. This spirit of yours won’t ever let herself be seen by the likes of myself and my associates, but as one of her former prey, you may just be the key to prying her out of her nest. I was planning on using the young lady here, but it was a last resort.” Ash’s shoulders jumped a little, this time moving firmly between the stranger and the bed.

“Don’t you fucking dare drag her into this.” He hissed, grabbing the lapel of his coat. The man simply waited for his temper to die down and smoothed the fabric down.

“Well, that’s where I hope you come in. You see, she won’t come out for me, but you on the other hand?” Ash was in no way ready to jump at the bait the man dangled in front of him, one hand reaching back and catching Isabella’s limp one, giving it a firm squeeze. He hoped somehow she could still feel him, especially now that he knew she was still there.

“Now why the hell would I do anything for you. You just admitted you were about ready to use my.. my friend as bait. A helpless woman against that thing?”

“Ah, you do have a point young man. But it wasn’t going to be for free, after all she would have benefited from it, despite all the dangers involved.” The man tapped his cheek, thinking, before his face broke into the smuggest of smiles. “But if I ask for your help then I suppose I would need to reimburse you as well. Huh, well I think I can offer something that would make it worth your while.”

“Try me, jackass.” He snapped back, ready to throw a punch and send the man out the door on his ass.

“Even if she wakes up, the poor girl would be stuck suffering through months of near unbearable pain as she would need to do through intense physical therapy. But what if I said there was a way to shorten the time for her recovery?” The words teased his ears, but as much as he wanted to believe it, there was that small voice that made him doubt every word. But he was so tired and just waiting was taking its toll on him.

“It would at the very least heal her body in a quarter of the time, and at least give her brain a chance to recover from the impact trauma. It’s not like I’ll be asking you to slay the spirit, just retrieve something specific to her. A stone she seems rooted to.” He knew exactly the item the man spoke of, the corpse of Hannah Wright had it proudly displayed around her neck before the mansion burnt down. “With the stone I’ll be able to bind her to a new vessel and thus her current hold on you would be done with and the poor girl can wake up before any more damage is done.” In his mind, Ash fought with his instinct and his wishes. Everything in him screamed there was a catch to all this, but Isabella… Isabella…

“Fine, but how the hell would I get out of there if she gets me.” To that, the man held up a gray stone with a hole in the center.

“Leave that to me.”

___________

The ruins of the mansion lay before him, stone and burnt pillars now overgrown with plants. A sea of daffodils covered the majority of the grounds, but other wildflowers sprung up in patches here and there. If Ashton didn’t know the history behind this place, seen the horrors, he would of called it beautiful. Scanning the grounds, his eyes zeroed in on a bare spot, and the lump that lurked just below the surface. Brushing away the dirt, he found what he was looking for, but the stone itself seemed to reject his touch. His skin burned the moment his fingertips brushed the surface, and yet left him chilled to the bone. Jerking away, he stared at his now cracked fingertips, blood seeping out of hair thin lashes.

“Damnit, I was careless there.” He reached into a pocket and pulled out a handkerchief, carefully bundling the wretched thing in the makeshift pouch. But as he stood, the air around him twisted and an angry howl raged through the clearing. The familiar creep of fear washed over him as the clicking began, before he grabbed the stone in his pocket. It dug into his palm, pain making his legs work again, and he turned to run, not daring to look back. The woods around him seemed to shudder and creek closer, but he wouldn’t stop. Nature itself tried to stop him, vines lashing around his throat, before exploding in flame as the charm flared to life. It gave him enough time to stumble back onto his feet and continue to run. Each time the ghost came back, the stone pushed her away, but he didn’t want to see if there was a limit to its abilities.

He broke through the cover, before he came to a sight that both made his breath stop and his blood boil. The stranger had just placed Isabella down on the ground, carelessly brushing a stray lock behind an ear.

“Oh good, you managed to retrieve her pendant.”

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Ash roared, this time throwing a punch, only to stumble as he missed entirely.

“Now now, she is alright. The machines are not needed after tonight, so I figured your sleeping beauty would rather see something other than the hospital ceiling. It is a very lovely night after all.” He straightened his gloves, before pulling a vial out of his pocket, the golden liquid within sloshed around, casting an eerie glow over her calm face. “You kept your side of the bargain, so I will keep mine. Your reward.” He held the vial out in one hand and the other held outstretched for the pendant. Ash eyed him, before carefully trading the pendant, a little too eager to get away from the accursed thing. The vial was warm and calming, luring him into a numbing haze, but he instead moved to lift her up. He froze when the man held up a hand.

“You need not worry, she won’t perish if you return with her back to the hospital, but I don’t think any of the nursing staff would approve of you feeding her something; by the time they would be finished analyzing it, the magic would have seeped away. Besides, magic doesn’t work well within the city limits, too much interference. My actions were completely calculated.” Ash growled, cursing him under his breath. He wanted to call bullshit, but he knew about as much on magic and he did curses, and considering that the bitch hadn’t leapt out to ambush him yet made him unsure even more.

“So what do I do, just pour this down her throat?”

“Well, in most fairytales, the princess is woken up by a kiss, but do what you want.” The man mockingly explained before he turned, holding up his prize with a grin. Ash shifted Isabella in his arms, watching as her face scrunched in pain, another terror or seizure springing to life. Pulling the cork out, he threw he head back, the thick concoction almost making him choke. Forcing his stomach to calm down, he carefully tipped her head back and pressed his lips to hers. The liquid dribbled down her throat and she reflexively swallowed. His heart thudded in his chest as time seemed to crawl before her brows furrowed and her eyes fluttered open. Fighting to focus, she zeroed in on his face. One hand rose up to touch his cheek.

“Ash?” She croaked and winced. “Ash, you’re squeezing too tight.” He laughed, unsure how exactly to react to the whole situation. She gave him a worried look, before hunching over, fingers digging into his shirt. Her breathing became labored before she screamed. He froze, unable to do more to hold her as her very flesh seemed to shift and warp under her skin. Suddenly she stopped, her voice grown hoarse. She gave him a pained look before her body began to literally break apart, flames engulfing each fragment.

“Ah, a thing about magic, there are no miracles. A price is always paid, so for her to heal, she must pay with her own lifespan. Seems like your princess’ was too little for the asking price. She must have been near death’s door after foolishly letting herself get hit.” Ash only saw red as he bolted up, ready to lunge at the bastard when cold rotten hands slammed down upon him. Above him, the ghost twitched and smiled, before glaring at the other man.

“Ah, I was hoping to tame her a little more before using her, but you did just attack me. Now onto my business with the princess.” Ambling forward, he kicked aside the smoldering ashes before reaching in to pull out a stone, the rich amber hues reminding Ashton immediately of Isabella’s eyes. Lifting the stone up, the man twisted and turned it, before pulling at a crimson spider thread that hung off of it.

“The soul and body is in here, but where is the will?” He tsked, before tugging at the string, not even sparing Ashton a glance. He muttered something, turning to give Ash a long hard stare. Another shriek from the ghost was silenced with a command, before a sick grin broke across his face. “Oh this is rather poetic. Here I thought I’d have to go searching for the other one, but lady luck favors me tonight. It’ll fetch a better price now. Say, Prince, ever wonder how DID you manage to escape the curse yourself? Want to know the answer?”

The man mockingly waved the stone around, before making a gesture and his head exploded in pain, the feeling of fingers desperately clinging to his hand. The feeling slipped away and a cry of his name made his eyes snap open, watching as a familiar shape was absorbed into the stone, which now glowed softly, like a sunbeam through a window. The Crimson thread was a stark contrast against the dark sky lingered, pulsing in time as a heartbeat.

“Such a lovely soul, even if the body wasn’t anything to really talk about. But a soul is easy to get ahold of.” Another tug at the string, and this time Ash realized his hand had moved. “Of course, where there is a princess, there’s always a valiant prince in the story. Two star-crossed lovers, now there is a rarity. But don’t worry, your efforts won’t be wasted. At the very least whatever alchemist who buys you two will put you to good use… Maybe.” Rotting hands began to pry his head up, forcing his clenched teeth apart. A hand covering his mouth made it impossible for him to see, but Ash could hear the cork pop from the bottle and taste bitter brew being poured down his throat. Self-preservation made him try to spit it up, but the same hand that held his mouth open slammed it shut. He expected fire and pain, if only to know what he had inadvertently forced Isabella through, but instead, he felt bitterly cold.

“Don’t worry, in a few decades you’ll get your chance to try again, if you can find her again. I do admit, I almost feel bad for robbing you of your happy ending.... almost."

A sharp pain barely registered, before all faded to black.

#the letter (vn)#An AU fic #I dont know where i went with this #I like to torture my favorite two characters

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