#about onesided!qcard

[yourbuerokrat2]

Headcanons or prompts for onesided!qcard?

[yourbuerokrat2]

Okay but this scenario in this AU has the potential to be both hilarious and have a bit of angst in them.

I mean, Q would lose (nearly) everything and he would not know when or even if his family would ever take him back. Besides, with his familys money being gone how would he pay rent. So, just like in Deja Q he would be forced to beg Picard to let him stay once he would realize that he really had no money at all. It also would hard but unexepected for him to see everyone else, meaning anyone he would spend time with outside of his appartment, leaving him or trying to get back at him for something except for Picard. It would be at this point where Q would be forced to see that Picard really is his only friend. Because even though Picard complains and shows no true pity about Qs situation he would let him stay. I mean, in this AU Q has not really caused the death of anyone and is not the Judge of Humanity. He is just a spoiled brat that is his mostly absent roomate and I don't see Picard throwing him out.

I think, there could even be a bittersweet moment where Q gets in Picards bed at night, like he had done at other times. But this time Picard does not react and pretend to sleep. Because Picard has not really been kicked out of his family but he is still no-contact and despite how Q may try to cover it up losing everything and nearly everyone in his life must take a toil on someone.

Considering Q has no real qualifications I am not sure wether he would do Picards job but since Picard is a Captain of a flag ship in TNG maybe he could have a higher position in a company in the roomate AU and Q would need some way to pay his share of the rent at least partly. So, Picard would try and suceed in Q getting a low-qualification job at his company. Far away from Picards office. But Q still comes to bother him.

In the end it could be Picard who could get Q back into his family. Because on one hand having a self-pitying Q who constantly complains about being poor like everyone else and who does zero housework and who would be quite clingy to him since Picard would be the only person left in his life because all of other party 'friends' would pretend not to know him once he no longer has the money to entertain them is all quite annoying. And to also have to not only deal with Q at work but also have to deal with his collegues and team complaining to him about Q being a jerk and not exactly someone easy to work with would be worse.

Honestly, I just love the thought of Picard giving the Continuum, in this AU Qs family, one of his long speeches on morality and humanity while Q is present. Qs family being like 'so, this is.. Picard, the guy you always talk about?' In the end, Q is welcomed back after they are convinced that he 'learned his lesson' because Q has actually been willing to work and Picard was rather convincing. And maybe Picard would succeed in forcing Q to 'grow up' where the rest of the family failed. Also, since Q mostly ignored them in favour of listening and talking to Picard maybe them living together woula also prove otherwise beneficial since as long as Q would live with Picard he would not cause too much trouble for the rest of them.

your q and picard roommate au is so goddamn funny. i keep thinking of this idea like. to mirror the episode where q gets turned human, there’s whole maybe 3 days where he is cut off from the continuum and therefore isn’t sent any money

so of course he makes this picard’s problem and just stays inside the apartment, depressed and talking about how he’s now broke and poor like everyone else and picard’s like “surely you still have some money left, right?” and q just goes “no i spent it all on this” and shows picard a golden fidget spinner with jewels embedded in it. at some point during the 3 days he decides to work the same job as picard and it goes horribly lol

anyway sorry for dumping love your art man keep up the good work 👍

this is so fucking funny i love it. thank you for this

[yourbuerokrat2]

Q was having a crisis, which actually was .. something new. Usually any and all Qs have had their last identy, moral and 'oh why am I like this? what is the meaning of a gods life?' crisis a few million if not a billion years ago, Q included. So, to feel him in the Continuum separate and yet one of them as all of them were both separate individuals and yet one, be full of unrest and even uncertainty and various other tings the Q had thought they had lost the ability to feel or even care about, was quite a novelty.

A novelty that most of them did not care about, having their own plans, duties and hobbies to take care of, too self-absorbed even in a place that was known for unity, yet Q seemed to feel the strange need to justify himself in front of them as if they were his willing rather than unwilling audience. As if they felt anything more thanmild amusement at the 'sight' of their most notorious and prideful member realizing that what he felt for 'The Representative of Humanity' was way more than a passing interest.

Because Q knew that this was not someting that was supposed to happen, especially not (in Qs own rant) to him, the absolute best of the best. He wasn't supposed to be so utterly willing to make a fool out of himself for something and someone like Jean-Luc Picard, and oh the longing in the thought of that name alone should be alarming if the Continuum hadn't stopped caring about affairs such as these a long time ago, having collectively chosen to get whatever entertainment they could get out of the ensuing chaos instead of trying to get Q to obey the laws that stated that too much attachment was not only a danger for a Q, but for the stability of the universe as well .

Then Q went on about how he had simply been bored for the last couple of millenia so of course he gets a bit.. excited about having found a new and interesting toy. Q was interupted by another Q who half-seriously suggested that if this was all Picard was, then they could maybe take up the role of the Judge of Humanity because they themselves are starved for a distraction as well. The rather strong, almost fierely (if the Q had human senses) 'No' with a rather personal and possessive sentiment attached to it that said Q was met with caused them to be amused enough about Qs reaction that they gave the equivalent of a laugh. His reaction actually seemed to embarrass Q somewhat, which was also rather new considering the Continuum was sure that Q had never felt shame nor had ever really cared of anyones opinion but his own.

"it's not my fault", Q tried to explain himself "Picard, he... "

Even Q quickly realized that shifting the blame on the human was quite ridiculous in this case especially since unlike Q Picard was utterly incapable of making people think or feel things against their will. Would very likely not even want for Q to feel this obsession, the humiliation and the despair every time the entitys mind wandered towards him and his little ship. Something which happened more and more often as the other Qs would be able to attest.

Feeling that Qs entertaining if short outburst was nearing the point where unrest was turning towards something else, someting none of them really wanted to feel nor see, the 'eldest' Q (they were not really the eldest because all of them very equally ancient but they still acted and considered themselves as the 'eldest' since they saw themselves as the most rational, wise and level-headed of all the Qs) came up with an offer, really more of a suggestion.

Perhaps or perhaps most likely Qs .. problems were not really caused by his rather strange feelings towards Jean-Luc Picard but towards a human. Perhaps the reasons for the rejections, for ... everything 'wrong' between them as Q felt it, was not caused by personal matters but simply because they were of two different species. On two entirely different levels of existence even.

Perhaps or perhaps most likely Picard would only be able to really understand Q if he were to be a Q as well. And Q would no longer humiliate himself and the other Qs by bending the laws of physics, timelines and existence itself for a human.

"You mean..."

"Make him one of us, Q. Make him your equal and I am sure you will have him then."

[yourbuerokrat2]

Q being platonically obsessed with Picard would be funny though.

Q: And that, Junior, was my best friend Jean-Luc Picard.

Junior: The human didn't seem to want to be your best friend, Dad.

Q: But he will want it once I am the only person in his life, well afterlife, that's left.

Junior: .. that's exactly the kind of thinking that caused Mom to no longer want to acknowledge your existence.

[yourbuerokrat2]

If Q was actually obsessed with him and worse about it than he was in TNG, Picard would be faced with quite a few problems. Because at frist no one would take it particularly serious. With Riker even making it light of it like 'haha I see your admirer is back, captain' and at first he would be mostly annoyed by it. But even if annoyed became concerned, as long as Q acted 'overdramatic' or kept to being his typical self some would just chalk it up to being an act. Maybe even Picard himself would be in denial about the seriousness of the situation for a while because the biggest problem regarding such scenarios is how no one except an uncaring Continuum could do something about this.

[yourbuerokrat2]

The trickster god who could have everything in the universe yet doesn’t get the one thing he absolutely wants. And at least half the universe is laughing at him because of it.��

But combine that with a delusional Q, whose mind doesn’t even want to understand that there could be the small possiblity of Picard not loving him back , and you have quite the desaster. 

Your scenario with Q being convinced that they are in love, married, have the crew as kinds and live a happy life together and your scenes made me think of a few other things that could work in this context. 

- Picard has already had a difficult, hard and long shift. Keeping his posture until he finally reaches his quarters, he allows himself to relax just a little bit as the door closes behind him.  Only to stiffen up again when he sees that his quarters have been turned in what museums portray as a 1950s US-American kitchen with Q even wearing a fitting apron. If the last dozen visits and gifts from Q hadn’t been so strange and frankly more than bit uncomfortable with the entity refusing to understand that they are not in love and that they are not married, his reaction would be a lot more hostile. But he is just tired and he already knows that Q will not leave until he has played out whatever it was he wanted with Picard. Still, Picard at least makes the attempt to tell Q to leave, which is shushed and he finds himself in front of decked table and Q asking if ‘the kids’ had been hard on him again. 

- One day the Enterprise is surprised with actual fire works going off in space with glowing hearts inscribed with ‘Q+P’ and a ‘Happy Anniversary, mon armour!’ being displayed. The rest of the crew are not sure if even mentioning what is happening is a good idea considering the Captains mimic. Data is he one to ask a curious queston, but Picard only sighs and tells them to ignore it. He is met with a rather happy and slightly flirtatious and playful entity when he gets to his office who has decided that for their ‘anniversary’ they are going to go on a romantic date together. 

- The Captain going missing is no longer as worrisome as it used to be. 

- Picard has tried to make it clear to Q that they are not together and more over that they are not married. Q had just laughed and showed him both Qs and Picard Starfleet files in which it is clearly stated that they are. Starfleet even upon Picards insistence is unable to edit said files. 

- Picard keeps telling himself that sooner or later Q will lose interest in this.

Eventually. 

Hopefully. 

- Q does not care who else is present when he decides to visit his husband. Which means Romulans, Vulcans and even some higher ups from Starfleet have been witness to Qs deluded take on romance. 

So much so that at one point Picard very briefly thought about switching careers because of the embarrassement of being called ‘chouchou’ and ‘lapin’ in front of both ennemies and his superiors. 

- The kids aka the crew are mostly amused by this since Q is not really doing anything threatening or bad. Guinan is against it however and warns and speaks of potential danger (although let’s be honest what is anyone supposed to do). 

- It’s a weird feeling and thought for everyone when it comes out that in Qs delusion they, the crew, are part of his and Picards family. Picard is not sure wether this makes it worse or better since Q rather than being in any way jealous actually includes his friends in some way. 

- Love letters. Written in constellations and on paper that he finds on his desk. Picard ends up throwing them away. They all end with ‘yours forever and ever and ever’.

- Speaking of forever just to annoy Guinan there is a heart with ‘Q + Picard forever’ etched right into her bar table. She is unable to get it off. 

- The only ones who could do anything about it, the Continuum, are actually quite entertained by this. Q has caused so much less trouble ever since his attention has gotten focused on this for the most part. 

- Some Qs actually make it worse and talk about how well Q and Picard fit together, about how the human is just ‘playing hard to get’ and how they know Picard didn’t really mean his rejection, etc.  Worst wingmen ever.

qcard? yes or no

personally, i do not think it is reciprocated on Picard's part, but Q is 100% delusional enough to believe that they are in love and married and they have a family with so many lovely kids (the crew) and they are living such a happy life. Picard on the other hand is oh-so tired of this nuisance of a being who will not stop sending enough flowers to make it impossible to walk into a room, popping up behind him on the horse whenever Picard goes horseback riding, and smirking at him from the other side of the bed when he wakes up even though he is like 99% sure that Q wasn't there when he fell asleep.

i do not think it is a two-way ship but i ABSOLUTELY do ship it. Picard deserves to be bothered by him, i think

[yourbuerokrat2]

Anybody got any onesided!qcard heacanons, scenarios or prompts?

[yourbuerokrat2]

Au, where qcard is completely onesided but the Continuum ships it causing Q to end up more than a bit delusional about his .. 'relationship' with Picard.

[yourbuerokrat2]

I am in a writing mood. So if any of you have a romantic, onesided or just purely platonic qcard prompt/AU that you want to read about you can drop me an ask. No NSFW but everything from dark/horror to comedy and fluff is welcome. Also the Voyager Q episodes never happened to me so no Suy!Q or Junior.

[yourbuerokrat2]

Also Qs shere hypocricy regarding Vash with saying how she is the one to always bring up/talk about Picard when it's actually Q who has that problem.

I mean Vash was kind of Qs consultation prize because he did want to go adventuring with Picard. But Picard said no.

So Vash must have heard Q whining about Picard not being there or how Picard would have done something different. Or what Picard would have or would not have one. Or wether Picard would have liked a certain ancient ruin or not.

But then when Vash comments on that or says anything even remotely related to Picard Q would be the one to be annoyed about how she is still 'obsessed with', 'in love with' or 'hung over that boring do-gooder'.

Another thing that makes this rather funny is if Q is like that with Sisko and Vash maybe he is even like that in the Continuum or with other aliens who don't even know what a human is. Imagine being constantly compared to 'Picard' and found lacking while not even having any idea who or what 'Picard' or 'Jean-Luc' is.

And Picard would be so uncomfortable if he found out.

I never fully understood Qcard until I started ds9. First Q episode and he genuinely will not shut the fuck up about Picard

[yourbuerokrat2]

Love me some onesided!qcard, where Q is either entirely oblivious that it is onesided or in denial about it.

[yourbuerokrat2]

Listen, there is a lot of wholesome but also a lot of dark potential in platonic scenarios/interpretations between Picard and Q.

[yourbuerokrat2]

Anji from the movies, but I always found it strange that apparently she was forgotten later on. Picard does more or less promise her that he has quite a number of Shore Leave days and that he plans to spend them all with her. Always would have been a good place for him to retire, since he wouldn’t age anymore and would actually get younger.  But maybe something always happened on just the day PIcard wanted to take his off days. Or when the time finally came, the Enterprise was just too far away for him to get back to that planet. 

And at one point he gave up. Thinking that considering how things were,, that it would only be fair to Anji if he told her that she didn’t need to wait for him anymore. Just another failed romance, that he should learn to move on both for her and for himself. 

And yes, I just did find it kind of ‘suspcious’ that just as she and Picard became close. 

I think with any jealousy towards Beverly, things are a bit more complicated. He did turn her into a dog that one episode and they clearly don’t like it each other, but I just can’t see Q doing something that would cause Dr. Crusher to just suddenly be far, far away. I mean, Beverly did accept that one position as head of Starfleet Medicine, but she also wanted to get back on the Enterprise soon after (something which I think Q commented on in Deja Q). So Q knows even if he pulls a few strings and Dr. Crusher will get offered a few other higher positions she probably will not take it. And as much as he is peeved, even if you take the will-they-won’t-they away Beverly is still very important to Picard and so even if he gets jealous 

Regarding jealous Q: I just remembered an episode of an officer, who got close to Picard due to her playing piano. They even played music together. But then she 'somehow' got transferred far away and it seemed like she and Picard would try a long-distance relationship. Which somehow was never mentioned again. Also I remembere the whole plot with Anji, who can't really leave her planet and Picard promsed to visit her during Shore Leave (probably never did, always something in the way).

Sorry this is a smidgen late I had college /jov but oooooooo I haven’t gotten there in my binge watch yet.

For the Piano-Player, it sounds like something attempted and failed naturally; some people are just not built for long distance and that’s ok— Picard strikes me as one of those people, even if he REALLY wanted it to and tried, he’d feel just as lonely as he’d begun. Someone please hug him. Q wouldn’t have needed to touch anything w/ that, but he’d probably be annoyed by it don’t get me wrong, maybe sped up the process a smidgen but leaving it be would’ve been just as effective. Meanwhile Anji definitely sounds like someone in the writer’s room forgot all about her and never mentioned her again, however, for in canon reasons, sounds very much like the all-mighty Q could’ve 100% gone ‘hmmmmm nope!’ just like Ardra >:]

[yourbuerokrat2]

Sometimes I think about onesided!qcard and how brutal Picards rejection of Q telling him that he loves him would be.

Starfleets star diplomat everyone, telling the Judge of Humanity off in the least polite way possible.

[yourbuerokrat2]

To be fair, Qcard is really the kind of fandom where there are not a whole lot of creators, but some posts get a whole lot of notes that makes the poster go 

Ok but like whhhhhhy is qcard not a bigger ship on this site???? Thank u for being one of the few to make qcard content

mfs be afraid of success frr. also thxx 🥺🥺 means the world to me. and ofc i will continue doing qcard content 🤧🤧