#about my childhood
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I need a comfort that came from before
I need windows that are too tall for me and I need someone to lift me up so I can see the tigers past the railing
I need cheap plastic toys and museum gift shops and the smell of popcorn drifting through the air cast in a neon glow
I need walks that seem too long and naps in the car and I need someone to hold my hand when the dinosaur exhibit is too scary
I need sticky railings and unwound tapes and rubber animals in plastic bags
I need dreams that last longer than they are and I need Saturdays and fruit juice
I need mom and dad to fight again and I need Pokemon games past bedtime and fruit rollups in my lunch box
I need me when me was young
I need a time that feels like a hug
I need memory to come back to me
#I' m a bit drunk and emotional#I looked at pictures of dinosaurs too long and got sad#about my childhood#drunk writing#i might be broken in the head
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I think that instead of being super apprehensive about Jason and him dating Roy, Oliver should take one look at him and then one look at Bruce and go oh, I'm about to be so annoying.
Oliver starts being so nice to Jason. So nice. Inviting him to family dinners. Giving him both his hero communications and personal phone number and telling him to call whenever he needs something. He gives him new tech and keeps updating his weapons and armor. He helps with missions and clean up and says nothing if Jason is a little rough, apart from patting him on the back and saying good job. He starts keeping his picture inside his wallet and has other pictures of Jason, Roy and Lian framed in the house and tells everyone about him. He starts calling him son-in-law first and then just son and then calls him a Harper and eventually a Queen.
At first it was just to annoy Bruce, but after the first time he tells Jason that he did a good job and Jason starts to tear up a little, Oliver goes oh no, oh I'm actually doing this now. This my boy now. I don't care if he and Roy break up or something, this is my boy now.
Bruce still thinks he's just doing it for the sole purpose of pissing him off, though, and he is so fucking mad. The Justice League meetings have turned into a Cold War zone.
Bruce starts to being so nice to Jason as well, forcing himself to ignore some of the more outrageous things Jason does, and Jason is so, so fucking confused.
#oliver seeing jason daddy issues todd: you're my son now I guess?#jason opens up to him a little about his childhood and everything else that happened and oliver is like bruce had you in therapy right#jason: absolute silence#oliver: he had you in therapy right? RIGHT?#dc#oliver queen#jason todd#roy harper#bruce wayne#jayroy#batman#green arrow#arsenal#red hood
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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specific tropes in romance that always heal something in me that it never broke
like, forehead kisses, soft love confessions, peppering kisses all over the lover's face. promises that are kept, hands those are held with a gentle love, and hugs that engulf the heart too.
or when they rest their head on your chest, or lean on you for support.
"your tears kill me," kinda thing. or when a sunshine character finally cries and bawls their entire life's hurt out into their comfort grumpy character (plus point, if the grump feels guilty thinking if they had done something to trigger this emotional outburst)
communication. no matter hard the topic is, how big your differences are.
listening to the other person yap
admiring their facial features and seeing not just the outer structure but the person that they really are.
them getting angry on ur behalf
cradling each other in hugs basically
feeling emotional walls break when you're with that one person particularly
gentle communication. yearning to do more for your lover (!!!!)
affectionate smiles and eyes crinkling with a smile that's directed specially at you.
finding their laugh contagious.
the feeling of being accepted, despite flaws and all
silent domestic acts like being in the kitchen together, dressing up together, them drying ur hair while u sit between their legs
occasionally stolen kisses
or one deep kiss that just lights your world and fulfills your soul and heart.
sleepily nuzzling into each other!!
reaching for each other despite being asleep, with mumbled endearments and whispers of need!!!
laughter coming easily by their side, like happiness is just another day to day thing (this can also be about self love. when u truly love urself and prioritize your own rights and cherish the fact that you're you. happiness becomes beautiful even in solitude)
their fingers buried deep in yo- OOPS.?! :)
#just me yapping about my typa love#nothing too serious#writing inspo#writing inspiration#writing prompts#romance writing#romance prompts#writing romance#soft love#soft prompts for lovers#soft dialogue prompts#soft prompts#fluffy prompts#fluff prompts#fluff#writer prompts#otp prompts#dialogue prompts#urfriendlywriter#imagine your otp#writeblr#romance prompts writing#otp ideas#fake scenarios#prompt list#kisses prompts#writing community#writing ideas#drabble ideas#childhood friends to lovers
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"even if no one else accepts you, I'll live with you"
#jjk#jjk spoilers#jujutsu kaisen spoilers#jujutsu kaisen#jjk 268#ryomen sukuna#itadori yuuji#my art#artists on tumblr#so i chose to draw them as kids#cause yuji was talking about how he grew up with his grandfather while sukuna didn't#and something something childhood is a formative time#anyway delusional but sukuna and yuji twin theory real
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i will never listen to anyone saying that being a child/teenager is the best years of your life because when you're 22 you can just decide you want cookies and then in like 25 minutes you have cookies. could a child do that i think not
#ramble#i've always baked but in my childhood i remember it taking FOREVER#and now it's 10 mins max and they're in the oven#also for the love of fuck please eat them fresh from the oven#don't put them aside and forget about them for hours you have to eat them now#warm baked goods are like passing ships in the night and by god i am dropping my anchor
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1.05 / Battle of the Labyrinth
#I FEEL SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS#percy jackson#pjo tv show#percy jackson and the olympians#pjotv#percabeth#pjo#screaming crying#mine#100#500#1k#5k#im in the middle of packing and this sent me frantically looking for my copies of pjo#anyway#i feel so insane i feel like im gonna die can anyone hear me. CAN ANYONE HEAR ME#annabeth has been so disconnected from the mortal world and just so fundamentally unable to enjoy her childhood#it makes me want to sob like seriously#i hope her and percy go on so many movie dates. like#not even just her and percy i hope percy tells grover and word spreads around camp and movie nights just become a thing at camp#because all these babies deserve it#god im gonna die. im seriously gonna die#WE KNOW THERE'S AN ORIENTATION VIDEO#SO THEY HAVE A PROJECTOR AND A SCREEN#MOVIE NIGHTS COULD HAPPEN!!!#okay bye. i'm going to go scream about percabeth some more
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free at last 🦋
#this was for kaeya’s birthday last year!#just thinking about how relevant crystalflies are to kaeya’s character…#i think they can symbolize a lot of things for him one of them being freedom#and another being the innocence of childhood..#but that’s for another artwork one day :P#kaeya#kaeya alberich#genshin impact#my art#2023 art#rissaito
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RAAAAAAH I LOVE THEM
#fionna and cake#adventure time#marceline#princess bubblegum#bubbline#crazy about this episode#childhood friends to lovers to enemies#do u see my vision#idc if it doesn't make sense
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reminiscing about childhood books after that ask - all due respect to cool sleek movie toothless....but to me, he will always be a mean little gremlin
#my art#dragon#illustration#how to train your dragon#httyd#httyd books#i love you small toothless. i love you and your beautiful eyelashes. you are not overshadowed to me#also fireworm (top right) and monstrous nightmares as a whole were SO influential on my art and also my ocs#i never thought about it until very recently but my god. my god. so obviously a heavy influence on florawell especially#i drew her a lot as a kid she was my fav. cause she was mean and snooty. nowadays i do appreciate the ugliness of seaslug though#i wanna read the end of that series eventually....get some childhood closure#cressida cowell's drawing style is so charming and good...like drawing intentionally ''bad'' (10000 quotation marks) is so hard to pull off
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I will never forgive Supernatural for making Dean out to be the bad guy whenever they came across a teen who wanted to hunt/was already hunting and he pointed out that hey maybe this kid who who hasn’t even graduated highschool yet shouldn’t be hunting fucking monsters
#Dean: hunting from a young age deeply traumatized me and stole my childhood I don’t think kids should be hunting#Everyone else: You don’t what you’re talking about!#supernatural#spn#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel#jensen ackles#jared padalecki#misha collins
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——-
#so many memories today#about my childhood#especially#i remember a lot and noticed how the negative memories come up immediately#the positive ones I have to slowly unlock#but just now I’m need before 12 hits I remember laying in bed as Schild#a child *#and hearing sounds outside#it was summer#even a little bright outside even tho it was late in the evening#I’d get super nostalgic and sad and happy at the same time#kinda feeling this now a little#not much on outside even tho I live in the city but it’s warm I hear dogs barking I think about my das and the amount of cats that I saw#my wish to change my trajectory of my life by quitting my job because this job and company feels like what started it all#i want to be myself again#not stressed and burnt out everyday#fearing that i‘m doing something wrong#finally meeting new people my age#just growing#new opportunities etc etc#getting out of my head out of who I because these last 5 years#i gutes wanting to get out of my head I need to let go be in the moment and not feel like surviving but simply living#guess*#good night <333
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doodles as i relive my spideyman phase from eighth grade
#first fanart in a while!#i was rewatching the ultimate spiderman cartoon bc it was my entire childhood lol#also this also happened bc i watched deadpool and wolverine and loved it but also came out of it loving spideypool and i feel like ive been#played. somehow#their dynamic is so good and crazy and i started reading the spideypool run and its actually so insane im crying#anyways here i am sorry i forgot about tumblr for a little bit i just forgot to log in ndjfhdjjr#school starts back up again and i am Excited (fear) but hopefully i can still post stuff ehe#have a good day and week! :3#spiderman#peter parker#marvel#ok bye
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in internet posts it is easy to cut them out of your life. they are hurting you! they aren't listening to you!
they held your hair back. they lent you lipstick. they held your hand at the train station and got you home safe. they rounded on your bully, got loud, said get fucked, spitting-mad in your defense.
they also cut the hair off again. told you that you should really think twice before wearing something like that. took you for granted. took your insecurities and threw them in your face again.
you know logically it should be easy. all the internet advice comments always read it will feel better. like an equation - if a person is rotten, you just remove them. you pull the tooth that's hurting.
but it was never a big flare-up moment. you don't live in a sitcom. they never tried to take your boyfriend or steal from your apartment. they showed up to birthdays and they wrote songs about you and bring you water without you asking. once you found out they carry an emergency inhaler for you, even though you haven't had an asthma attack in years - just in case.
where is the line? people fuck up. sometimes they fuck up badly. sometimes people have raw personalities, like a powerline, and being around them is dangerous. addicting. sometimes they can't help themselves, but you know they're trying. sometimes they are just rough-around-the-edges. sometimes they don't even realize how they sounded when they said that. sometimes it's just - you've both loved each other for so long now, the way this thing hurts goes back to the root.
and that's the fucked up part. you have pushed your fingers against the sweetheart of memory. things these days are electric, tense, harrowing. they didn't used to be. there were a lot of good days in there. sometimes you want to just close your eyes and say can this be over yet? do we still need to be fighting?
doing that would give up any chance you get of getting an apology, but you don't always know that you need an apology, you love them. once they flaked on your birthday party. once they told you to get over it, people are always dying. they also let you crash on their couch for a week after the breakup, handfeeding you when you were so sad you couldn't eat. they are also judgmental about everything, occasionally react to banal statements with an attitude that is weird and fiery. they also love you like a lighthouse sometimes, so strong they cut the storm like lightning.
but the problem is that you might be storm. you might be the thing that needs breaking. what if you are two forces who are desperately, horribly drawn to each other, shaped by the other person's passions, and both good for each other and bad in equal measure.
what if you're both just people, and you're no saint neither.
just cut them off! swallowing the saltwater, you catch yourself in the mirror. you've been shaking more than usual. there's an ache in you that is oblique, loud, impossible to soothe. is this what it looks like? when life is "easier"?
your mouth will always have a hole, is the thing, if you remove the tooth.
#spilled ink#warm up#writeblr#this is about someone specific but feel free to blorbo on main.#tbh this is familial for me so that is an element but it's also about childhood best friends#and probably about ur enemies to lovers blorbo#(but i want to specifically say if ur partner is like this. not necessarily a good partnership lol.)#(the dynamics at play in familial/friend relationships feel equally important and in some ways are HARDER to escape.#bc we can see that this is a potentially toxic romantic foundation.#but in family ? ...... it's toxic and it doesn't stop u from loving them. bc u always have.#and i think that makes it harder. by a lot. which is what this is referencing).#but genuinely and really truly forever feel free to tag ur potentially toxic enemies to lovers on this and all my poetry#here i'll do one for u - adora & catra :x
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toby and my waffles!!
#I salute the old fandom where Toby was crazy about waffles#this was my childhood#and these are the waffles I baked in the background!!#creepypasta#ticci toby#creepypasta fanart#my art#fanart#sketch#digital art#ticci toby art#creepypasta fandom#creepypasta art#ticci toby creepypasta#artists on tumblr
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The crew of a massive container ship that crashed into the Francis Scott Key bridge in Baltimore early Tuesday warned of power issues before the collision, which caused the bridge to collapse into the frigid Patapsco River, officials said.
Maryland Gov. Wes Moore said the warning from the ship’s crew likely saved lives.
“We’re thankful that between the mayday and the collapse, that we had officials who were able to begin to stop the flow of traffic so more cars were not on the bridge,” Moore said. He called those officials heroes.
Moore noted that the bridge was up to code at the time of the collapse. He said the collapse was a “shocking and heartbreaking” event for the people of Maryland who have used the bridge for 47 years.
(continue reading)
#i was in dc this weekend for a funeral#we bounced over to baltimore to visit some family friends from childhood#i drove over that bridge twice!!#francis scott key bridge#baltimore#bridge collapse#baltimore bridge#glen burnie#i dont think it was an infrastructure problem#but if oversized cargo ships can gain that much momentum#then maybe they should be required to come to a complete stop#prior to going under a commuter bridge#that or maximum ship size requirements by bridge#or maybe use tugboats??#it seems more like a regulation issue#and yes - even if it was an accident#someone still needs to be held accountable#or it may happen again#a very similar incident happened in my hometown#i think about 4 or 5yrs before i was born#sunshine skyway bridge
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