#abortion pills kill

[killed-by-choice]

“Sadie Roe,” 24 (USA 2013)

“Sadie” died after undergoing a chemical abortion. Her death was counted in the FDA Adverse Event Summary for the mifepristone/misoprostol abortion regimen, but despite investigation, it is still unknown which of her complications caused her death.

Sadie was 24 and had no known health problems. On or about August 15, 2013, she underwent the abortion. She began to feel sick afterwards and went to a doctor, who prescribed an antibiotic. It is unknown what kind of infection the doctor had diagnosed.

On August 20, someone found Sadie’s dead body. An autopsy was conducted to try to find out how a young woman went from healthy to dead in five days.

The autopsy results came back with a mystery. Although traces of cannabinoids and ibuprofen (most likely Sadie’s attempt to treat her pain) were detected, both were so inconsequential that the toxicology report cleared her as negative. Neither drug was in a concentration that could have killed her. Many people had already died of sepsis caused by Clostridium bacteria, so tissue samples were sent to the CDC for testing. The samples came back negative for the species tested.

However, several life-threatening problems were found at Sadie’s autopsy. She had retained part of the placenta from the abortion, which is a serious complication that risks infection. Her organs were damaged; she suffered “acute visceral and pulmonary congestion and edema.” Microbiology testing had come back negative for the Clostridium strain that had been investigated, but after less than a day the cultures grew streptococcus viridans.

So which of these killed Sadie? The coroner initially listed “unspecified natural causes,” but the CDC analyzed her case and tried to determine what the cause of death was. They finally concluded that the cause of death was undetermined, but included her in the count of pregnant people who died after chemical abortion.

Years later, six doctors reviewed Sadie’s case. They found the confirmation of retained placenta, her symptoms and the Streptococcal species in her lab cultures to be indicative of sepsis and Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome. Viridans group streptococci can cause life-threatening infections and had been reported to have antibiotic-resistant strains, so this is also consistent with the Azithromycin prescription.

While we still do not have a definite answer on the precise cause of Sadie’s death (and sadly, we may never be sure), it can be assumed beyond reasonable doubt that side effects of the abortion played a highly significant role.

Individual Case Safety Report number 9587011-03-00-01, Danco Laboratories, LLC. Office of Post-marketing Drug Risk Assessment, Food and Drug Administration.

https://www.fda.gov/media/154941/download

[fingertipsmp3]

I did have a productive day tbh. I did all my work shit, I made two appointments and I went for a run for the first time in 5 days :)

[ilyrafe]

𝒇𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒖𝒕𝒆𝒔 ✧ 𝒓. 𝒄.

pairing: ex!rafe cameron x ex!f!reader

warnings: angst, pregnancy scare

word count: 1.6k

“i need to talk to you, it’s urgent. can i come over?”

the text catches rafe by surprise as he hasn’t spoken to you in three weeks. since the breakup, to be specific.

despite not being your boyfriend anymore, rafe still cares for you a great deal, and you rarely text him stuff like this, so it must be serious.

“of course.”

he puts his phone down and begins to wonder what must have happened for you to break your own idea of going no contact.

this has been killing him, not being able to talk to you. he misses you more than he anticipated and it sucks. it’s horrible not having you around, and the saddest bit is that he has no one else to blame but himself.

him and his ways.

half an hour later, he hears a knock on the door and before he can stand up from the chair, you come in. you seem anxious. terrified, even.

“hey.”

“hey, what’s so urgent?”

“i’m late.” you say, but rafe frowns, not quite understanding what you mean. “i’m late, rafe.”

“late?”

“my period, rafe. i’m late.”

oh.

oh, no.

“h-how late are you? i thought you took the pill!”

“i did, but i am a week late. so, i wanna know what we’re gonna do about it.”

rafe needs to breathe, it seems that all the air has left the room. he takes a step back and rubs his face with both hands, trying to be rational.

you’re probably pregnant with his child. this is not how he imagined this was going to happen. it turns out, rafe is quite traditional.

“what do you want to do?”

you seem a bit surprised with his question.

“i… i don’t know, rafe. we’re too young.”

“i’m good with whatever you decide. if you want to keep it, i won’t, uh, i won’t be absent. i’ll provide for you both, i’ll do everything i have to. and if you don’t want to keep it, i’ll pay for it.”

this isn’t going how you were expecting, if you’re being honest. you expected a fight, you expected rafe to claim it wasn’t his child, but… he’s being mature about it, which is new.

truthfully, you don’t know what you want. sure, you’d like children, but not now. not when you’re nineteen and don’t have a clue about what you’re doing in life. not when you don’t have a partner, a job, a house. not when the father of your child is rafe cameron, a drug addict with anger issues.

“i’d like to buy some tests first before i decide what i want to do.”

he nods and takes his car keys, leading you out of the office and taking you to his car.

it doesn’t take long for him to drive you to the nearest drugstore. when he parks the car, you don’t move an inch.

“hey, what’s wrong?”

“i can’t believe this is happening to me.” you say, not being able to hold the tears any longer. this is a nightmare. “what am i gonna tell my parents?”

“you’ll tell them the truth. you’re pregnant and you won’t be doing this alone, i’m here.”

you look at rafe quite skeptically and try your best to believe him, but he’s broken your trust so many times before, it’s difficult to see any honesty in his words.

“not telling them anything and getting an abortion is also an option, you know? we don’t have to tell anybody. whatever it is that you decide, i’m cool with it.”

for your own sake, you choose to believe him and wipe away your tears before you exit his car and go to the drugstore.

you try not to look so suspicious, but you’re looking around, to make sure no one you know is there, and thankfully you’re safe. you buy three different tests and quickly come back to rafe’s car.

the drive back home is excruciating. you can already picture your future as a single mother. you fear what your parents will say if you are indeed pregnant, which you probably are. you’re never late. when you were two days late, you thought it was odd, but then the days kept passing by and nothing happened.

then you did the math.

rafe, on the other hand, is actually happy that you might be pregnant with his child. he always knew he wanted to be a father. this is probably not the best time because you’re not a couple, you’re not really adults, and you don’t really have a stable life, but hey, this is what happens when you have unprotected sex. sure, you took the pill, but no contraceptive is one hundred percent effective.

this kid may be rafe’s only chance to have you somehow linked to him forever and that isn’t a bad thing necessarily… right?

once you’re back to tanney hill, you and rafe nearly run to his bedroom and he makes sure to lock the door so no one can catch them. you open them all and read all the instructions to do it right. you enter his bathroom and once you’re done, rafe has expectant eyes.

“so?”

“we have to wait five minutes.”

“oh, let me set a timer.”

he pulls up his phone and sets a five minute timer while you sit on his bed and sigh as you look up, trying to remain calm, but you can’t.

“i think we should talk about our… possibilities.”

“what possibilities?”

“if you are pregnant and want to keep it, you won’t be doing this alone, okay? i promise. i know this isn’t ideal, but… we’ll get through it. money isn’t a problem.”

“rafe, this isn’t the point. i don’t want to have a baby at nineteen with someone who isn’t my husband. like, i respect the ones who do it, but i don’t want this to be my life.”

rafe chuckles. you’re such a goodie-goodie, he wonders how the hell he managed to get you to date him.

“c’mon, you’ll be a great mom.” he says, truthfully. “you’re great with kids and you’re so caring, so understanding.”

you look at him and chuckle.

“that’s not only what it takes to be a mother.”

“but that’s also important.”

you lie down on his bed and take a deep breath. if rafe wasn’t so unstable, you’d consider having his baby, but… he’s not. he’s being good now, but you can’t predict how he’s going to be tomorrow morning and you can’t raise a child in this environment. you know better than that.

“if you’re keeping the baby, i’m getting clean.” he says. “i’ll quit everything.”

“rafe…”

“i’m serious. i don’t want my kid to be afraid of me, to be in danger because of me.”

the last part breaks your heart a little, as it was one of the reasons why you decided to break things off with him.

“that’s… that’s good to know.”

“i know we don’t need to be married to have a kid, but it’d be nice to, i don’t know, try again.”

“you want to get back together because i’m pregnant?” you snort.

“i want to get back together because i miss you and i love you, and since you might be pregnant, i think it’d be better for us to try again, so our baby can have a full family. you know, mom and dad in the same space.”

our baby. hearing rafe say such things make you even more confused and aggravated, only because you know, deep down, rafe isn’t the right guy for you, as much as you love each other. you know you’re too good for him because even barry told you so.

“he’s a lost cause, y/n. don’t be wastin’ your time with him, he’ll get you in trouble and you don’t deserve that.”

“stop saying things like that, rafe. please, this isn’t the time.” you plead, trying not to cry.

god knows how difficult it was to end things with him, because you love him oh so much. as cliché as it sounds, he’s really not like the other guys. he’s sweet, caring, funny and smart, but he also keeps setting himself up for failure and you’ve realized you can’t fix him and that realization alone broke you in tiny little pieces.

it’s like they say, loving someone is also learning to let them go and this is what you’ve been trying to do. it kills you that you told him to never talk to you again, because you miss his voice. you miss his jokes. you miss hearing his voice saying your name or whatever silly nickname he comes up with.

his phone rings, startling you both. once again, you don’t move, so rafe takes you by the hand and enter his bathroom with you. on the counter, you take the tests and see the results.

negative

negative

negative

the relief you feel is indescribable. you can finally breathe.

“what does it say?” he asks, a bit anxious.

“they’re all negative.” you respond, showing him the tests.

“oh,”

“oh, my god.” you sigh, smiling for the first time in a week. you turn to rafe and give him a hug. “thank you, rafe.”

rafe hugs you back, basking in the feeling of having you back in his arms again. for a few seconds, he allows himself to forget you both are broken up and just had a pregnancy scare. for a few seconds, you’re his again and nothing else matters.

“you okay?”

“now i am.” you chuckle, wiping away new tears.

“d’you want me to drive you home?”

“no, no, it’s okay. i’ve bothered you too much today.” you say, jokingly.

whenever you said that, he always said you never bother me, but he figures now it would be inappropriate.

“call me if you need anything, okay?”

“okay. thank you.”

you give him one last smile before you get your things and leave tanney hill, feeling light as a feather, not at all suspecting that rafe feels like absolute shit.

when you pictured your life as a single mother, rafe saw himself with a family. his own family. the people he would do anything and everything for, the people he would love endlessly.

the only hope he had of having you back in his life, the only thing that would make him turn his life around, the only person who would make him want to be a better person.

it never existed.

tell me what you think! i love feedback <3

[anexperimentallife]

So you want leftist candidates? Here's how you get them:

First off, you have to understand that the far right didn't just wake up one day and say, "We should fuck up the country!" They have been OPENLY working for decades to fill literally every elected or appointed government position they could with Christian Dominionists and other right-wingers, and these folks show up to the polls EVERY SINGLE TIME.

When I was a kid in a far right church in the 1960s, they openly discussed how important is was to get their people into office who would help pass legislation to persecute/imprison/kill anyone who didn't follow their religion. If there's no one sufficiently right-wing running, they'll vote for whomever is closest, even if it gags them. And I cannot emphasize enough that they have long term goals that they are willing to take--and HAVE taken--generations to achieve.

The overturning of Roe v. Wade, for example, is a DIRECT RESULT of the decades-long effort by the far right to boost the most far-right-leaning candidates they could find. They've been talking for decades SPECIFICALLY about getting enough far right judges in SCOTUS to overturn Roe v. Wade. And these SCOTUS appointments are for LIFE, so these judges get to set policy for your GRANDCHILDREN.

So yes, the overturning of Roe v. Wade was only made possible because Trump was able to appoint three SCOTUS judges, in addition to all the other federal judges he appointed. Amd they're talking about going after same-sex marriage, minority rights, etc.

(Hell, the judge in charge of his secret documents case is one that he appointed--she has indefinitely postponed that case,by the way.)

And you don't think local school board elections are important? Have you not seen the news about all the anti-queer policies, and all the book-bannings? This, also, has a generational effect.

Meanwhile the left refuses to turn up to the polls because none of the candidates are pure enough. So guess why things are getting worse?

If the Left turned out for the most left-leaning candidate at EVERY SINGLE ELECTION, whether local or state or whatever, including primaries, we'd start seeing more leftist candidates. Yes, that means that if there's a choice between two extreme right wing candidates, you vote for the least extreme one.

I know I keep emphasizing that this is not just about POTUS, but POTUS does figure in, of course (among other things, who do you think appoints judges for congress to approve?).

So swallow this pill: Anything shitty Biden is doing, the shitgibbon will do MORE of.

"Not gonna vote Biden because he supports genocide, so I'd rather the guy win who ALSO supports genocide, wants Russia to invade more countries, thinks it's fine if China retakes Taiwan, wants a nationwide abortion ban, removal of civil rights for minorities, wants to overturn same-sex marriage (which the right-leaning majority in SCOTUS are already talking about), to cut back the role of congress in checking executive actions (including workarounds to avoid the need for congressional confirmation for presidential appointees), to remove federal employee protections so federal personnel can be replaced with Trump loyalists, and so on! That'll teach those Dems a lesson! THEN they'll be sorry. And fuck everyone the bad guys hurt, because I'll still be PURE. So what if top GOP officials want to actually NUKE Gaza?"

That's fucking kindergartner thinking.

Yes, Biden is a piece of shit, but I am not waxing at all hyperbolic when I say that a second orange shitgibbon term, with a far-right-majority SCOTUS--especially if the GOP manages majorities in both houses of congress--may be the end of what little is left of Democracy in the US. Not gonna argue about it, because I don't waste my time with petulant children.

Look at the GOP's plans for a Republican administration, and tell me you think it sounds better than another term of Biden. Hell, they've even set up online trainings and loyalty tests to narrow down potential federal hires to those who will commit to follow Trump without question.

I repeat: If you want more leftist candidates, if you want more worker power, if you want billionaires taxed, if you want to protect minorities and the queer community, you have to adopt the strategy that the right has used, educate yourself about what candidates stand for, and show up EVERY SINGLE TIME. Again, that includes primaries.

So many of us on the left would rather sit in the basement dreaming of some magical revolution that's going to fix everything, giving ourselves and others purity tests, and proudly announcing that we're... boycotting democracy by not voting(?), "because none of the candidates are a good choice."

Yeah, the left refusing to vote--or only voting in presidential elections--while the right turns up every time is exactly how we got here.

And you have to support the most left-leaning candidate even if it makes you gag, and even if "most left-leaning" means "not as openly fascist." This is the ONLY way you can be assured of candidates getting further to the left in the future. (Note that this means learning about your local candidates.)

"But voting won't fix--" I never said it was going to fix everything. There's no rule that if you vote, you can't volunteer with Food Not Bombs, or run for school board, or demonstrate, or circulate petitions. It takes more than voting, but voting has to be PART of our strategy.

You also have to accept that it may take decades to change course, and that you're not going to like every candidate you have to vote for.

The right didn't just magically get the orange shitgibbon into office overnight. It took decades of work. And if we want decent human beings in charge, we have to be willing to do the same.

[killed-by-choice]

Jessie-Maye Barlow, 19 (UK 20 December 2012)

Jessie-Maye Barlow with her daughter.

Jessie-Maye Barlow was only 19 years old.

Only a few months after giving birth for the first time, Jessie found out she was pregnant again. She and Daniel (the baby’s father) were overwhelmed with the idea of having two babies by the age of 19. They decided on an abortion, which is legal and widespread in the UK. An abortion facility in Richmond, southwest London administered a chemical abortion.

Jessie was given the abortion pill in September, but she wasn’t told about the real danger of what she was doing. She didn’t know this was going to kill her.

The abortion facility should have followed up to check Jessie for complications, but they never even called. Their neglect put Jessie in even more danger. By December, Jessie was still bleeding and feeling awful, so she went to a doctor on December 8. The doctor realised how sick she was and sent her straight to West Middlesex Hospital hospital.

Doctors at West Middlesex Hospital realized that Jessie had contracted a severe strain of antibiotic resistant superbug streptococcus B. The cause of the infection was that the abortion pill left fetal body parts and/or the placenta still inside of her.

Jessie was treated with surgery and antibiotics, but the infection was so severe that it destroyed one of the valves of her aorta. After that, it attacked the heart itself. On December 20, Jessie’s chest pain was so severe that her family called an ambulance. Just hours later, the teenage mother died in St. Peter’s Hospital— about 5 weeks after her “safe and legal” abortion.

Others who were killed by infection after taking the abortion pill include Holly Patterson, Manon Jones, Oriane Shevin, Chanelle Bryant, Hoa Thuy “Vivian” Tran, Sarah Dunn, Anita Koli, Crystal Roe, Jane Roe of Canada, Marcie Roe, Carmen Roe, Wanda Roe, Belle Roe, Tara Roe, Corrie Roe, Tina Roe, Toni Roe, Raeden Roe and Summer Roe.

[causeimhappinesss]

His baby mama, part 1 (Corey Cunningham x reader)

Plot: Corey Cunningham gets his girlfriend pregnant. But since he's too scared of his mom, he doesn't tell her and doesn't fully take his responsibilities. Because of this, the reader breaks up with him, but… Did he really forget about her?

Pairing: Corey Cunningham x reader

Warning: stalking bitch (Corey), pregnancy(?)

Disclaimer: English isn't my native language (I'm french), so you can correct me if you spot some mistakes :) + it’s gonna be a short story, so don’t seek a full development as you would in a novel + read my author's notes at the end

PART 2

---

“Are you sure? Maybe it’s a mistake, maybe the test isn’t working…”

“Corey, I took a blood test. I’m pregnant.”

Your boyfriend’s face decomposes before your eyes. Corey stands there, his shoulders hunched under the yellowish light of the bedside lamp. Fear and indecision disfigure his usually more serene face.

“It’s too soon for us to be parents,” he replies, his trembling voice betraying his dismay. “We’ve only been together a year, and my mother… If she finds out about this, she’ll kill me.”

You watch him, your throat tight and your heart beating wildly.

“I didn’t choose this, Corey. I’m under birth control, I’m taking all my pills, you know that. But now it’s done. Maybe… Maybe it was meant to be.”

Your hands instinctively rest on your belly, a natural protection against the uncertainty of the moment. You’ve just found out about your two-month pregnancy, only the day before. Why weren’t you worried before you missed your periods? For the simple reason that you’ve never had a regular cycle, due to the stress you’ve been under all your life.

He swallows loudly and drifts his eyes elsewhere to avoid your gaze. Obviously.

“What if… What if we thought about abortion? The money I earn will go to my engineering program…” he murmurs, almost ashamed. Yet you know very well I might not be accepted in any university, given his criminal record, even if it was an accident.

The room seems to shrink around you, the walls lined with old floral wallpaper absorbing every word like a secret to be buried. Actually, this conversation was draining all your energy and you felt like it was burying you alive.

“What about the accident with Jeremy? You think that’s just going to vanish from my life? This town… They hate me. And with a baby, they’ll target you when our relationship will be exposed.”

As his voice breaks, he remains unable to finish his sentence.

The air between you becomes electric, charged with unspoken words. Your fists clench to hold back the trembling of your hands, as do your jaws. Tears burn your eyes and fog your vision. Your heart beats painfully. His words feel like a stab in the chest.

“Then go away!”

The words spurt out, sharp and irrevocable. You breathe hard, your lungs struggling against the dense air of the room. He frowns, his eyes on you, in which a glimmer of distress gleams.

“If you can’t handle it, get out! Get out!” you insist in a sharp tone.

His eyes cloud over with tears and sparkle with pain, as if he’s looking for something on your face… Perhaps a retraction on your part? A final confirmation for him to leave without looking back? He seems to be looking for something in your face, a reason to stay or perhaps permission to leave. But he finds nothing, just a reflection of his own distress.

Corey takes one step, then another, moving slowly toward the door. Each movement is heavy, as if he’s carrying the full weight of his choices and fears on his shoulders. He places his hand on the handle, his white knuckles betraying the strength of his grip.

“I…” he begins, but his voice is lost in an inaudible whisper.

With one last look, a mixture of apology and regret, he opens the door. The creak of the hinges seems to underline the finality of the moment. You stand still, staring at the empty space he’s left behind. The door slams behind Corey, a dry, final sound, bringing in the smell of impending rain this October 2021.

If only he could stand up to his crazy mother Joan. If only he could gain confidence in himself! If only he could understand that he was betraying you! After all, right from the start, you’d always opened the door of your house to him so he wouldn’t have to go back to his mother and hear her screaming, belittling him, even slapping him at times. You were the only woman in all of Haddonfield who agreed to give him a chance after the accident, even though you knew about the child’s death. You never judged him. You gave him all the love he needed, building a relationship of trust and pure love. True love.

Yet he’s just proved to you that he’s not worthy. Like father, like son, after all, since his father abandoned his mother when she was pregnant with him.

And as long as he doesn’t rebel and become a real man, no longer a scared teenager, he won’t move on with his life, you were certain. You, however, couldn’t stay stuck at this dead end.

Alone in the silence that followed, you closed your eyes, finally allowing your suppressed emotions to rise to the surface. Silent tears roll down your cheeks, each a promise of struggle and resilience. You breathe deeply, smelling the familiar scent of your great aunt’s house, mingled with the fresher scent of the rain to come. Here, in this house that is now yours, you will find the strength to face what lies ahead. Alone, but free.

*

In the weeks that follow, Corey tries to get back to you with numerous messages and calls, which you reject every time, but also by coming to your house. You never open the door for him. And as soon as you spot him in the town, in the stores, you make sure you avoid him. Better still, you’ve changed garage for your car repairs. In any case, none of his messages or voicemails indicate that he will assume his paternity, oh no. He wants you to understand his point of view. Like a little boy, he’s terrified. He doesn’t want you to stay mad.

As the months go by, his texts become rarer and rarer, until you don’t receive them anymore. From time to time, however, you find a wad of $100 bills in your mailbox, in an envelope signed “C.C.”.

You face your pregnancy and the birth of your child alone, without a father. Yet your few friends are there for you, and when your parents can, they visit you in Haddonfield. When the baby is born, you hesitate, but decide to leave an envelope with the baby’s photo and her name in your mailbox, knowing full well that Corey will pick it up. Did you do this to make him take responsibility? Out of simple kindness so he knows your daughter’s name and what she looks like as a newborn? Perhaps.

Again, the months go by and your daughter is only a few months old. Thanks to a friend, you learn that Corey has found love again in the arms of... Allyson, Laurie Strode’s granddaughter. The news hurts and stabs you in the heart. Deep down, maybe you were hoping he’d come back and finally become a real dad, not just a biological father. Especially since the older your daughter gets, the more she looks like him, with her natural kind of pout, her silky brown curls with golden highlights. Sometimes, she even seems to have her father’s eyes.

What you don’t know is that Corey never completely abandoned you.

He spied on you.

Over and over again.

You became his obsession, despite your many rejections during your pregnancy.

*

The room is plunged into darkness, subdued by half-closed shutters. Only a trickle of light from the street sneaks in through the slits. You gently cradle your daughter, her cries gradually subsiding under the effect of your comforting caresses. Her steady, soothing breath calms you, as you lay her gently in bed. An exhausted sigh escapes your lips, then you let yourself fall onto your own bed, letting fatigue fall on you like a leaden screed. Your heavy eyelids barely lift to glance at the clock, which is blinking mercilessly: 3:30 a.m. How long has it been since you’ve had a decent night’s sleep? You don’t even remember, but the dark circles under your eyes testify to the many nights of sleep cut short and the incessant preoccupations flooding into your brain. Being a single mom was hard as hell.

As you drift off to sleep, reality suddenly catches up with you. You jerk open your eyes, your heart pounding in your chest like a panicked drum. A man stands over the cradle, frozen in the half-light like a shadow, a sleep paralysis demon. He wears blood-stained overalls, his face hidden behind a white mask devoid of human expression…

Michael Myers.

Your eyes widen. Your breath freezes in your throat. A shiver of fear runs down your spine. You panic, but you force yourself to remain calm so as not to wake your sleeping daughter a few yards away. Without taking time to think, you try to throw yourself on top of your daughter, whom you try to press to your chest. Faster than you, the man pushes you away and presses his body against yours, still on the bed. His hands slip around your neck, ready to strangle you… One of the serial killer’s habits, as everyone knows, when he’s not stabbing his victims with a kitchen knife.

You try to scream, to fight against his relentless grip. Your throat tightens, unable to produce the slightest sound. Panic takes hold of you, a burning sensation that consumes every part of your being. Gradually, your strength leaves you. Suddenly, a wave of familiarity washes over you, a fragrance that takes you back to distant memories, forgotten moments of happiness. The sweetness of this reminiscence is swept away by the implacable terror of the present situation.

You try to gather your thoughts, to find a way to free yourself from the grip of this stranger who holds you prisoner in your own bed. Before you can articulate a single word, a brutal shock hits the back of your skull, a blinding explosion of pain that overwhelms you and engulfs you in darkness. Then, it’s pitch black.

“We are finally reunited…” whispers the husky male voice.

[Author’s notes]

Should I write another part? If yes, what do you want to happen next?

Sorry if it’s not developed enough. I would totally do it if I was writing one of my novels… But this story is mainly to satisfy myself lol

My Ko-fi: betrayedwriter

My AO3: BetrayedWriter

My Instagram: carolinemertz_

Want to read my novel if you know some french? Find them in my bio 😉

[drdemonprince]

People treat American politics like sports -- and it serves very much the same function as sports. It is a source of constant new content that can be easily analyzed, repackaged, and commented upon by the media class for a profit, distracting the public and manipulating their emotions, often by amplifying fleeting, moment-by-moment shifts that won't actually be consequential.

It also defines the boundaries of American life -- what American culture supposedly is, and what it means to belong to it or to participate meaningfully in it. If you pay too much attention to it, you get to believing that all that matters is who is holding the ball, and you stop forgetting that it's all a game, and that we could all collectively change the rules at any time we wanted.

It's endlessly frustrating to me to see even the people who realize that it's theater get swept up in its ongoing mini-dramas, and take part in endlessly churning content out about it themselves. If you already recognize that the leadership of both parties represent the interests of the ruling class equally, and equally represent police militarization, the national surveillance apparatus, corporate interests, global exploitation, colonialism, and genocide worldwide (and are the source of your own economic and legal oppression, if you're a person living in the country) why would you find a debate between candidates fascinating? Why would you be rooting for one representative of the ruling class to score a dunk on the other on a stage?

I can't think of a worse use of one's time. If you know who your enemies really are, you don't start rooting for one of them simply because you like their plotline better. And if you actually recognize a solidarity between yourself and the people who are constantly having resources extracted from their lands by American companies and who are being killed in Gaza by American-made bombs, then you wouldn't be hoping for the continued existence and prosperity of an America that occasionally does one or two nice things for you to keep you quiet.

If you think that it's the American government that "gives" you the right to get an abortion or to be gay or transgender, then you're always going to be easy to manipulate into compliance. In reality, it is the state that has the power to take your freedom AWAY -- and it does so constantly, with its police-patrolled protest zones, restrictions on healthcare access, prisons, and taxes for bombs.

But if you recognize that no state should have the ability to define how you get to live and who you get to be in the first place, then you'll forever be suspicious of all the little pacifying treats and fleeting distractions that it offers you. You won't feel relieved that at least the person extracting money from your wallet to build Reaper Drones is a woman, this time. And you won't thank her for giving you the abortion pills that are prepared and distributed by workers who live all around you, and who will continue to know how to do that vital work long after the empire is gone.

[haunteddetectivepeach]

Danny 'Jed Olsen' Johnson x pregnant reader

You

You met the ghostface regularly, or rather, it went to your home. You had sex many times, at first you felt guilty about the fact that it is the ghostface and the same hands that satisfied you and touched you are the same ones that kill innocent people.

Most of the time he did not use a condom. But it was okay because you are taking pill, but now, the unexpected happened, your mestruation has been late for 2 weeks, you thought it was just because of the stress of work unitil it started to feel alot of nausea and your breasts were well sore, you refused to take a pregnancy test, for fear, fear off what will happen if you are pregnant, pregnant with a serial killer, not just a serial killer, but the ghostface, or rather, Danny, at the least that was the names he gaves you.

You just woke up from a party that your friend Jessie called you, you are not much of parties, but you were a little away from your friend because of your little case with the largest serial killer in the United States of America, and was scared of what he can do about people close to you, Danny is a little jealous, the last time a guy screwed me, he cut his throat the next day...

I felt guilty for days, but the guy ran a hand on my ass, so on a second thought, i don't feel guilty at all.

RING RING RING

The alarm sound tuck tou of you thoughts. And them the desire of vomit again, i think i will really have to do this...arriving in the bathroom, you took the small box were there was the pregnancy test from the courter where you have you things. After doing the whole process, you let out a sign and them start to despair when you look at the results, positive, "Positive, a fucking positive, of couse, the pill was no use shit any" you talk softly "Jesus Christ, what do i do? Abortion? Tell him? Cry?scream? Oh my god, oh my fucking god, i have to run away? Just go?" You start crying softly, looking at the little staff in your hands, and finally, thrown on the trash.

Danny Johnson/Jed Olsen

I woke up early to play the perfect american citizen Jed, the dear Jed, who all love and no one even suspicious. I passed my gel on my black hair I observed my body toned on the mirror, despite some scars, and them my suit and tie, all perfect.

I arrived at gazette journal, greeted the receptionist and secretariats until i arrived at my office. I was trying to make my new article, John Smith, my last victim, but i couldn't have her out of my head, the woman i find myself, me, Danny, not the Jed. Then my mind dive to her body curves, her breasts, her ass..."Damn" i have to stop thinking about her, i have to do this article, and a can't to it with an erection, it would spoil the perfect Jed, no one can think Jed is a pervert that get hard at work, but damn, i still remember our last night, the last time we saw each other, because unfortunately i was too busy with John shit Smith, at least it was a good death, but nothing, nothing make me forget her, my bunny, she's too perfect, her body, her face, i remember every little bit about her body, you can't forget a woman like that, not even if i wanted to, i still remember...our sweaty bodies in that bed, her breasts swaying as the rhythm increased, her nails digging into my back, her legs whapped around me as if she didn't want me to leave, her sly moans in my ears as you told me to go deeper, harder, more...more, the creaking of the bed, the wet sheets, your room smelled of sex, and the only sounds heard were our skins slapping together, you sweet moans. Only her, only she can do this to me, she holds me and i can't let go, she was the only woman, who entered my thoughts and i can't take it away, i can't.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

A knock on the door brought me of my thoughts. "You can come in" Soon Jeff enter "Olsen, here is some informations that the police gave us, we need this article sent today" Jed gives him a small smiley enough to Jeff "Of course sr, it will be ready before you remember it" Jeff nodded "I knew a cold count on you, Olsen" Then Jeff left the room eating his disgusting greasy donut in his hand, Danny wanted to kill this man, but he know's he can't, he realized that he can't kill anyone at work that would bring suspicion, and he really doesn't want to be seen or have problems with the police.

You

I'm at work talking to my boss about a state transfer, it was my decision, i going to leave, i going to run away and I'm not going to tell anyone, not my friends, anyone. I really have to go, what would he do if he found out I am pregnant, and worse, with his child. I can't, i can't take it, I'm terrified, we don't even have a relationship, i don't even know if a know him well, of course I know that he is the ghostface, the most wanted serial killer in Roseville, Florida. But at all, I never saw his face, at least not all of it, we kissed so much times, we had sex but I was blindfolded most of the times or remaining wearing a mask. My boss said there was a transfer to Utah, and i accepted. And about Danny, he hasn't come for a few days, probably busy with new victims, and we are not dating ou anything else, We just fucked, a lot of times. Whenever we fucked i would wake up alone in the sheets, wich still had his cheap cologne on, he would stay with me until I fell asleep and leave late at night so he wouldn't be seen. He always leaves a post it saying something like: See you, Darling. That's why I know he cares about me, but a child? A child of ours? A mini us? I'm definitely scared if he finds out before I can leave, it's for the best for us, because he is a fucking serial killer, and yet, I slept with him and not just once. Okay, i have to leave today, I'm not taking any furniture, nothing, just some clothes and essential objects for my work so that he doesn't get suspicious before I can leave. I told my boss not to tell anyone about where I went , no matter who. I took the first taxi to the airport and just let myself go. "Goodbye, Danny."

Danny

After work, I got ready with my ghostface costume and went to see her, i parked far from her house, in the darkest part, where no one could see me. I watching trying to find her, but nothing. I decided to go in, i looked in every room, and i waited for her to arrive, hour passed and i tried to call her on my spare number that I use for ghostface calls, but she wasn't answering, I ran to check the drawers and nothing, there was no nothing, i decided to go back the next day.

The next day, i went to the hospital where she works, I ask the receptionist if you was there, and she told me that you don't longer work there, i asked to speak to your boss, he told me that you request transfer. Why? I asked him where, but he said you asked him not to tell anyone, no matter who. Shit. At night, i went to your house, pissed, angry, that's all l fell. Why? You think you could get into in my head, and just...leave, like it's was nothing? I started to break down everything, thrown everything on the floor. "FUCK"

You

It's been 2 years, 2 years since I left, 2 year I've been in Utah and a year since my baby was born, a strong and healthy little boy, he has the same grey eyes as Danny, and the face is similar, it's been exactly 2 weeks since he turned 1 years old, I made his day the most especial. My mother helped me with everything since I arrived in Utah, she helped me with the move furniture and my house a large two-story with 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, my son's room is fully of toys, painting notebooks and very colorful for my baby.

I was preparing his food while he has coloring with crayons, when the news on television caught my attention, i was paralyzed. ALERT: 26-YEARS-OLD MAN FOUND DEAD THIS MORNING. On the television was the photo, the ghostface over the censored corpse, my son was entertaining himself with some building blocks, for wich i thank the gods. It took a while to reason, he...he's here, in Utah. He knows? Does he knows I'm here? Did he come after me? Did he come to kill me for leave? No, I just paranoid, there no way he was discovered at all. "Damn, stop worrying, everything will be okay, he will not find me, I hope..."

Two weeks after the first ghostface murder

Danny

I was crouching in a bush watching a house, and that's when I saw her. There she was cooking and dancing to the sound of a song where I couldn't identify. But... she was not alone, squeezed my eyes and managed to see, was a baby, a boy, apparently 12 months or 1 year. Smiling without teeth right. So he made the calculations, 1 years that the baby appears to have and 2 years she left, she was still meeting him, wasn't she? Or she was having sex with another guy while sleeping with him..or is his baby?. That's why, why is she gone? Is the baby really his? A fruit of them two? I was dipped in my thoughts. I need to see right, I need to see the boy well.

You

I was holding my son on my hip while we danced to the sound of (f/v)

And I prepare a food for both of us. Until I observed a movement outside. I put in (y/c/n) in the Feeding chair and headed toward the window, watched and found nothing. Maybe it was my head, or not. When I and (y/c/n) we finished eating, it was a little late and put him in the crib, I sang a song until he fell asleep, when he slept, headed for my room that was near him to be easier to Listening to crying or meeting your needs, put a nightgown and tied my hair awkwardly with a little hair in front and lay down. A few hours or minutes maybe I heard a wooden noise, I took a bat and went towards the noise came from.

It came from my son's room, walked fast towards a totally dark room, I stared at the crib and he wasn't there when I looked at the armchair that is located in the corner of the room and was there. Danny. Holding our son, in his arms, was the small figure sleeping peacefully with his little hands playing lightly in the white mask, Danny who looked at him, suddenly changed his gaze to me, the only lighting in the room was the moonlight brightness, Until then the silence was broken. "Hello Darling"

"What are you doing here?" "What? I can't visit my lover? Or rather, my son's mother"

He said getting up carefully as he snuggled (y/c/n) in the crib. "It's my baby, isn't it? So you left?" He says approaching slowly until he was centimeters from you, the difference in visible height and the small space that could only be heard the breaths of each other, he put his hand gloved in his chin and raised stop his eyes through the mask. "Answer me, honey" He speaks so low that he sounded like a whisper. His lips separated to speak, but nothing left. He raises a little from the mask and gets closer, you finally wave your head."Yes..." he then gets millimeters from you and collides the lips against yours. When you leave it, he looks at you eyes with a predatory gray look at yours and says "our son, and you are mine, sweetheart, just mine, and we are a family. We and our little boy. I love you, bunny"

He said with his head now without the mask touching yours. with your lips almost touching

"I love you too, Danny".

[prolife-is-prolie]

I celebrated Roe V Wade being overturned. I am now being investigated for having a miscarriage.

"The happiest moment in my life was when I said "I do" to my husband seven years ago. My second happiest moment was at the Supreme Court building on June 24, 2022. Seeing an endless sea of happy, cheerful faces, the champagne bottles being popped open, watching as bubbles floated on by, the feeling was electric! Babies were going to be saved!

And then a year later, on June 24, 2023, the third happiest moment in my life occurred. The two faint lines revealed themselves on the pregnancy test. I was pregnant! Finally! After years of hoping, praying, and multiple IVF treatments, I was finally pregnant! Life was perfect. My husband took me out to dinner and he never left my side the whole night. He came home from work one day with a giant book of baby names. It didn't take us long to decide: Ophelia if it was a girl, and Benson if it was a boy.

I thanked the Lord for gifting me with a happy marriage and a baby that I prayed so much for. But the Lord had other plans. August 23, 2023, my world came crashing down. I woke from a deep sleep and was overcome with painful cramps. I looked under the blanket and was horrified by what I saw: A huge puddle of red. I ran to the bathroom and sat on the toilet and I cried. I was having a miscarriage.

My husband woke up and noticed the puddle of blood. I've never seen him look so scared in my life. He hugged me while I sat and bled on the toilet. We then stripped down and got in the shower, where he held me, not caring about the blood running down my legs. I scheduled an emergency doctor's appointment for later in the day. The doctor confirmed our worst fear, I had a complete miscarriage. There wasn't anything more that could be done.

I sat on the table in that cold room while I waited for the doctor to come back with my paperwork. I was completely numb. I had no more tears left to cry. My husband stood by me and held my hand while we waited. And then we heard the knock on the door. We were expecting the doctor to enter. Instead, we were met with a couple of police officers.

My husband and I were escorted to the police station. It was there that we were informed that my miscarriage was deemed suspicious. The officers told us that due to the fact that we lived in a pro-life state, this was the new protocol. My husband and I were each taken to separate interview rooms, where we were questioned for six hours. I was asked a variety of questions:

What did I do the night before miscarrying?

Did I have a fall that could have caused the miscarriage?

Did I intentionally cause trauma to my abdomen to induce a miscarriage?

Did I take abortion pills?

Could my husband have slipped abortion pills into my drink?

At first, I tried to be understanding, but that quickly turned to anger. They were accusing my husband and me of purposefully killing our baby. I told the interviewer over and over that we wanted our baby and that we would do nothing to cause harm to our baby. After six hours, the questions let up. The interviewer left the room and I instantly broke down in tears again.

I cried for the baby I lost. I cried because my husband and I were being accused of killing our baby. I cried because I felt like nobody was listening to me. And I cried because this is what pro-choicers said would happen when Roe was overturned. Everything that they said would happen was happening.

Miscarriages were being investigated as murders. Children were being forced to give birth to their rapists' babies. Babies were being born and discarded in trash cans and dumpsters. And we have not done a damn thing about any of this. My husband and I were released, but not before being told that we weren't allowed to leave town due to the fact that we were being investigated.

I read articles about the women in Texas suing the state because of the anti-abortion laws. I read about the 13-year-old girl who gave birth to a baby she did not want. I read about the 11-year-old who had to flee her home state to get an abortion, only for the doctor who performed the abortion to get fined. I felt sick to my stomach reading these stories. And once again, my sorrow was replaced with anger.

I thought back to what I thought was one of the happiest moments of my life, Roe V Wade being overturned. In my mind, the happy smiles that I saw were suddenly replaced with evil snarls. The champagne that was popped was replaced with acid. The bubbles became heavy glass and they fell to the ground. My god, what have we done?

I forwarded the articles to my husband and I saw all color leave his face. The night after our interrogations, we ate dinner in silence. After knowing this man for 17 years and being married to him for seven of those years, he didn't need to talk for me to know what he was thinking. And I agreed with him:

Overturning Roe V Wade was a huge mistake."

-Constance, 37.

[dhaaruni]

Thurman’s story plays out in every country where abortion is banned. Women still seek abortions, but now they do so in dangerous or unsafe conditions, or with inadequate medical supervision. They lie to their friends and family about where they are going, drive or fly for hours to seek care, and then return home, possibly bleeding heavily. Having to travel for an abortion raises the risks of the procedure enormously. Until abortion was legalized in Ireland and Northern Ireland in 2018, women went covertly to England. (Many still do because access remains limited.) Polish women travel to the Netherlands. In El Salvador, where anti-abortion laws are so strict that women have been jailed for natural miscarriages and premature births, the rich fly to Miami for terminations. Around the world, women denied access to abortion care seek do-it-yourself solutions. ProPublica reported today on a Georgia woman in this situation, Candi Miller, who died after procuring abortion pills online. The mother of three had an autoimmune disease and other medical conditions that substantially increased the health risks of pregnancy.

[anamericangirl]

I just saw a post on my dash about how to make your own abortion pills and I firmly believe that this will literally kill women.

Oh it 100% will.

[sethsclearwater]

request: “Hi!!! I love all of your work!!! Feel free to ignore but could I request a "reader finds out she's pregnant and she thinks that Paul's gonna be mad so she hides it"? I love the angst that ends with loving, passionate smut or just super sweet fluff at the end but only you know how Paul would react. Again, I LOVE your work, thanks for all you do!!!”

warnings: pregnancy???, smut, breeding kink-ish but reader is already pregnant, paul being… paul

notes: before any of you come for me - i firmly believe that paul would absolutely have an awful reason to reader being pregnant IF she wasn’t his imprint. i think the imprint bond would make it very difficult for him to be mad at reader for anything. 

…

you and paul had been together for almost 3 years now. paul had imprinted on you during your senior year of high school and at first, you wouldn’t give him the time of day. it took him nearly 9 months to finally win you over and go on a date with him.

and obviously dating him wasn’t the easiest thing in the world due to his at times very unruly temper but the imprintee bond clearly affected you too and you rarely left his side after you had started dating. though, since word got out to the pack that bella was pregnant, you two had been separated more often than before.

about a week after bella’s pregnancy news broke, you found yourself sitting on the lid of your toilet seat in quite literally the exact situation. 

you gripped the pregnancy test in your hand, tears streaming down your cheeks as you stared at the plus sign. you weren’t sure how this happened, you were on the pill and took it daily but you and paul had slipped up here and there by letting him finish in you. you never in a million years thought this would’ve happened. 

you knew paul didn’t want kids. he made it very clear to you on multiple different occasions and you knew it was because he was terrified of becoming his father. you never argued with him about it even though being a mother was something you’ve always wanted, understanding where he was coming from but now that clearly came to bite you in the ass.

with paul out on patrol dealing with his protest against bella’s pregnancy, you went into a full-blown panic mode. you grabbed your phone, immediately looking up the nearest abortion clinic, and scheduled an appointment for the following week on their website. 

you were pacing around the apartment, trying to figure out what to do until your phone lit up with a text from paul letting you know that he was on his way back from patrol and would see you soon. 

you whimpered, heading back into the bathroom and throwing the pregnancy test out before turning on the shower to hopefully buy you some time and make you look less distraught.

it didn’t take long for paul to get home, he pretty quickly joined you in the bathroom after he realized you forgot to lock the door, sitting on the lid of the toilet while he told you about everything that was going on with bella and her supposed vampire baby.

you were washing your hair, thanking god paul couldn’t see you as you broke down crying when he told you they were planning on killing the baby. you thought you were being quiet until you let out a loud sob, legs shaky as you sat down on the floor of the shower and curled your legs up to your chest.

paul quickly pulled the curtain back, “what’s wrong?” he asked worriedly, immediately getting in the shower with you and pulling you into his lap, his clothes getting soaked by the warm water streaming down.

“hey, hey look at me-” paul cooed, curling his hand free under your chin to force you to look up at him. you shook your head, pressing your hands to his chest in a weak attempt to push yourself away from him. 

he just shook his head, tightening his grip on your hip and releasing your jaw to pull you closer to his chest, “what’s going on?” he asked softly, pressing his lips to the crown of your head as he waited for you to calm yourself down.

you took in a shaky breath, shaking your head as you let out another loud whimper, “i can’t tell you.” you explained weakly, burying your face in the crook of his neck.

“what do you mean you can’t tell me? princess,” paul sighed, pressing his lips to the crown of your head again, “i can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.” he explained, rocking you from side to side as you continued crying into his chest. 

you tightened your fist on the thin fabric of his t-shirt, shaking your head again as he cupped his hand under your jaw, gently forcing you to look up at him, “hey,” he cooed, thumb rubbing circles on your jaw as he watched your worriedly.

“just tell me what happened and you’ll feel way better princess, i promise.” he cooed softly as tears continued to run down your cheeks, you hiccuped from the tears, bottom lip quivering as you shook your head again. 

“you’ll hate me.” you whispered hoarsely, and he shook his head.

“princess,” paul sighed, “i couldn’t hate you if i tried. please tell me what’s going on.” you whimpered, taking a deep breath as you took his hand and pressed it to your lower abdomen. 

paul looked from you, to your abdomen, and then back up to you again. you let out a loud sob, hiccuping again, “i’m so sorry i don’t know what happened.” you explained weakly, “i already booked an appointment at the clinic and i’ll deal with it but i just-” you paused as another sob racked through your body and you wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your face into the soaked fabric of his t-shirt as you sobbed. 

it took paul a moment before you felt his arms slide up to wrap around you, holding you close to his chest, “shhhhh…” he cooed, pressing his lips to your hairline, “how far along are you?” he asked softly, gently rubbing his hands up and down your naked figure. 

“i don’t know,” you whimpered, peeking up at him, “maybe a month? i’m sorry-” you started but he slid his hand under your jaw and pressed his lips to yours, stunning you for a moment.

after a moment he pulled away, resting his forehead against yours, “i want you to have him… or her - fuck - i’m so sorry princess” paul explained and you whimpered, sliding your hands up his chest to cup his face in your hands.

“you’re not angry?” you asked softly, and he shook his head, gently brushing the tears off your cheeks with his thumb.

“no,” paul sighed softly, “of course i’m not angry with you princess. how could i be mad at you for being pregnant?” he reassured, looking down to where both of your hands rested over your naked abdomen and let out a soft sigh. 

“you can barely tell yet,” he started, sliding his other hand down from your jaw to the small of your back, “i was wondering why you’ve been so sensitive lately.” 

“sensitive?” you asked softly, letting out a giggle as you sniffled, using the back of your hands to brush your tears away. 

“physically i mean,” paul quickly explained, looking back up at you before adding, “sorry, didn’t mean that you’re emotional.” 

you giggled again, “i’m a hot mess right now paul, i think it’s fine to call me emotional.” you sniffled, wiping away the tears that continued to fall down your cheeks.

the corner of his lip curled into a small smile, “i’m sorry, your clothes are all soaked now.” you murmured after a moment and he shook his head, sliding his hand up to the back of your neck to pull you in for a soft kiss. 

“the clothes will be fine. why don’t we use the tub so you can relax?” he suggested and you nodded, both of you taking a deep breath together before he helped you up, turning off the shower and helping you sit down on the counter as he started the faucet on the tub.

“you like those bath bomb things right? wait can you use those now? i don’t know what pregnant people…” he trailed off and you giggled again, sniffling before responding.

“yes i can still use the bath bombs paul.” you answered softly, smiling up at him sheepishly and he chuckled, tossing one in the bath before peeling his soaked shift off and tossing it into the hamper.

you watched as he undid the zipper on his shorts, staring a little longer than you probably should’ve and paul quickly caught onto it, “sorry,” you murmured, cheeks heating up as you looked away from him, “these stupid hormones are messing with my head.” 

you felt his pointer finger lifting your chin up so you could look at him as he used his other hand to part your thighs so he could step in between them, “nothing to be sorry about princess.” paul cooed, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, gently gnawing on the skin and he released your chin, brushing your hair behind your ears, “good to go in the bath?” he asked softly and you nodded, wrapping your legs around his waist and arms around his neck so he could lift you up.

he stepped into the tub, lowing the both of you down into the warm water so you could straddle his lap. you let out a soft sigh as the pink warm water encompassed your body the smell of lavender from the bathbomb immediately relaxing you into paul. you rested your cheek against his shoulder as he rubbed his hand up and down your back, committed to calming yourself down.

“i meant what i said earlier,” paul started after a moment and you hummed softly, not sure what he meant before he continued, “about the baby i mean.” he clarified, “i want you to keep him.” 

you pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder, “you want a baby?” you asked, threading your fingers through his hair. 

“with you.” paul responded before clarifying, “i want a baby with you.” the corner of your lip curled into a smile at that, using your free hand to take his hand and press it to your abdomen, humming softly as he rubbed small circles against your skin.

“do you want to keep him?” paul asked softly, almost sounding… concerned which was unusual for him. you pressed another kiss to his shoulder before lifting your head up to look at him.

“of course i do,” you said softly before adding, “you know i want a baby… i just thought that you wouldn’t.” you murmured, looking up at paul anxiously as he let out a soft sigh of relief, his hand giving your hip a soft squeeze. 

“i’m sorry i made you think that,” paul pressed another gentle kiss to your hairline, “i do want you to have him.” you pressed a soft kiss to his jaw, trying to hide the wave of tears that rolled down your cheeks at his comment.

he cupped your jaw with his hand, “why are you crying?” he asked softly, thumb brushing the tears away as you shook your head.

“‘m sorry it’s just these stupid hormones.” you murmured again, letting out a soft giggle as you tried to compose yourself and paul smiled, pressing a soft kiss to your lips. 

you melted into him, quickly knotting your fingers into his hair as you pulled him closer to you. the water splashed a bit as you shifted to press yourself completely against him, your hips subconsciously rolling down in an attempt to create some friction.

paul pulled away for a moment to allow you to catch your breath, resting his forehead against yours, “can we…” you trailed off shyly.

he smiled, nodding as he ran his free hand over your thigh and inbetween your legs, “you tell me if it’s too much, okay? i don’t wanna stress you out.” he asked and you nodded.

the gentleness was so unlike him, something you’d only seen on a few occasions so having him touch you like this was intimate. he grazed his finger of your clit, eliciting a loud whimper out of you. 

you whined, grinding your hips down against his finger and he chuckled, “sensitive little thing.” he murmured under his breath, pressing down on your clit to give you the friction you were craving. 

“paul please-” you whimpered and normally he would’ve reprimanded you for not using your words but tonight he was committed to staying as gentle with you as possible. he nodded, dipping a finger into your heat as his thumb continued to rub gentle circles against your clit.  

you mewled in his lap, tightening your fingers in his hair as he added a second finger, gently scissoring his fingers to stretch you out for him. he felt your breathing hitch as your walls tightened around him quicker than usual, “you gonna cum on my fingers princess?” he asked softly, using his free hand to rest against the small of your back and help stabilize you.

you nodded, letting out a loud whimper, “can i?” you asked breathlessly, grinding your hips down onto his fingers as he continued pumping his fingers in and out of your pussy. 

he nodded, “go ahead then, cum on my fingers princess.” he cooed, watching in awe as you quickly met your orgasm with his approval, throwing your head back as a soft moan left your lips and your velvet walls throbbed around his fingers. 

he allowed you to ride his fingers for a few more moments as you rode out your high before you leaned forward, relaxing your grip on his hair to wrap yourself around him, resting your head on his shoulder. he pressed a gentle kiss to your temple, rubbing his free hand up and down your back as he pulled his fingers out of you, cooing to you as you he whimpered at the emptiness. 

“gonna fill you up in a second princess.” paul reassured, pumping his length in his hand and helping lift your hips up with his other hand.

you moaned softly when you felt the tip of his length press against your entrance, paul gently pulled your hips down so you sank onto his length, releasing your hip when he was fully seated inside of you so he could give you a moment to adjust to his size.

“fuck,” he groaned as he felt your walls flutter around him, “you have no idea how good you feel princess.” paul leaned back against the tub and cupped your breasts with his hands, rolling your nipples between his fingers. you meweled at the heightened pleasure, tightening your grip on his shoulders as he continued to play with your nipples while he waited for you to adjusto him.

you whimpered after a moment, pressing a kiss to the crook of his neck and ground your hips down against his letting him know you wanted him to move. normally you would’ve been reprimanded for not using your words but it seemed like paul was quite enjoying being softer with you tonight as he gripped your hips, and dragged you up and down his cock.

you sat up, grabbing his biceps to steady yourself as he continued to bounce you on his cock. “paul-” you groaned loudly, beginning to assist him with your movements as you rolled your hips down.

paul threw his head back at that movement, “fuck-” paul groaned, “you feel so fucking amazing.”

you mewled at his praise, bouncing up and down on his cock as you chased your second orgasm of the night, “atta girl,” paul encouraged, “my cock making you feel good?” 

the slew of praise had you teetering on the edge of your second orgasm, you nodded, whimpering out an, “mhm,” as your eyes watered with tears as you tried not to cum on him right then and there, “can i cum on you? please-” you whined, desperate to come undone on your boyfriend.

“go ahead then, i’m right behind you,” paul encouraged, his grip tightening on your hips as he started fucking you on his cock at a pace that was more pleasurable for the both of you, “wanna see you make a mess on my cock.” 

his encouragement was all you needed to cum on him, head falling back as you let out a loud moan, gripping him like a vice and sending him over the edge right after you. paul let out a low groan, pulling you down as far as you could go on his length as he came, releasing your hips to pull you closer to him as the two of you rode out your orgasms. 

paul was the first to come back down from his high, pressing soft kisses to your hair as you came back to reality. “deep breaths princess,” paul cooed, rubbing his hand up and down your back.

you nodded, slowly sitting back up as you let out a yawn, “you tired?” he asked, threading his fingers through your hair to stroke your scalp.

“mhm,” you murmured, “can you stay with me tonight?” you asked softly, worried he’d have to leave for patrol again.

“obviously i’m staying with you tonight.” he reassured, “c’mon.” he cooed, helping you wrap yourself around him so he could pick the both of you up and get out of the tub.

you whimpered as he set you down on the counter and pulled himself out of you, quickly grabbing a towel and wrapping it around you and worked at drying you off. once he was satisfied that you were dry enough, he quickly dried himself off and threw on a pair of boxers and sweatpants before helping you into your pajamas.

he picked you up again, walking you into your shared bedroom and lying you down on the bed before getting under the covers with you, “you’re gonna look so pretty with that pregnant belly,” paul mused as he pulled you into a spooning position so he could rest his hand on your abdomen.

you giggled softly, “you think?” you murmured, peeking over your shoulder at him and he nodded, “absolutely positive.” he reassured, “now get some sleep, you need it.” 

you smiled, wrapping his other arm around you so you were caged in his grip before drifting off.

[eruhamster]

Anya tried to tell Curly about Jimmy, and he didn't do anything.

No one protected her.

As the nurse of the ship, she was expected to perform mental evaluations of everyone else. Even Curly comments on his own failing to say he never thought about her own mental health.

She gets pregnant. She tries to tell Curly. He fails her again. He fails all of them by trusting Jimmy, who already does not have the capacity to care about the bodily autonomy of others. He dooms them all in an act of selfishness.

They say the same thing that people always say to defend rapists; arguing their lives shouldn't be judged by 'a few minutes' of a 'mistake'. But that mistake is how their lives all end.

Jimmy pulls Curly out of the wreckage to paint things in a different light, and Curly becomes the new Anya.

Anya saves Curly's life, even when he's burnt to a crisp and should by all accounts be dead. She's a great enough nurse that she managed to stabilize him, but he remains in constant pain. All because Jimmy wanted to keep him alive.

His bodily autonomy is stripped from him. Jimmy shoves whatever he wants down his mouth. Curly's punishment for his mishandling of Anya's rape is that he goes through something similar, losing all power over Jimmy and becoming nothing but his toy to be abused.

As the nurse, the pills are Anya's job. But she won't do it. Jimmy calls her a bad nurse and useless for it, but she saved Curly's life; she's phenomenal. She just can't do it because giving Curly the pills is akin to experiencing her trauma through the other. She'd be acting out the part of Jimmy. She can't do it.

When things get worse, she can't take it anymore. She tries to protect both herself and Curly from Jimmy. She locks themselves in the medical bay. Curly didn't protect her, but she wants to protect him.

She probably wanted to put Curly out of his misery. But couldn't bring herself to do something like that, when he can't even speak to say if that's what he wants.

So she just takes the pills. She can finally end this and kill herself rather than continue to suffer, and now Jimmy can no longer continue to shove pills down Curly's throat. It was an act of kindness.

Jimmy finds another victim to abuse since he lost immediate access to Anya and Curly. He can't go a minute without abusing someone else.

And once the door to medical unlocks, Anya is shoved off in a corner, out of the way, blocked out in Jimmy's vision. Even in death, he can't view her as a person. Her bodily autonomy mattered least of all to him.

Jimmy raped Anya and impregnated her. There was the initial act of the rape that took away her bodily autonomy, but also the removal of bodily autonomy that comes with months of an unwanted pregnancy. No one on that ship can offer her an abortion. They're there for 8 more months. Once they're off the ship, it's too late to have an abortion. She will be having that child. And then it's essentially two decades of stasis, of her life being put on hold for a child she never asked for.

Jimmy has a "few minutes" of a mistake by crashing the ship. That "one mistake" left Curly suffering for months with no bodily autonomy. No way of saving himself. No way of saying no. No out. Months of having his bodily autonomy stripped of him, reliving that trauma. Months. And at the end of it, as one last insult, Jimmy shoves him in a stasis chamber, where Curly will remain for two decades. He never asked for it. But Anya never asked for it, either. And in the end, neither of them could truly protect the other from Jimmy.

[killed-by-choice]

“Tina Roe” (USA 2017)

Recently a decision was made overturning the approval of RU-486 in the United States. While this will undoubtedly save many lives, it came too late for many victims of the abortion pill.

“Tina Roe” was one of many deaths from the legal use of the dangerous RU-486 pill, which is so dangerous it was only approved in the first place with a REMS requirement, a rare restriction reserved for extremely dangerous drugs. Her death was mentioned in a report by the US Government Accountability Office. In the span of a few months, a sponsor detected and reported multiple additional deaths to the FDA that the agency missed entirely— Tina’s death in September 2017 and another one reported in December 2017 (Toni Roe).

The report was made to evaluate labeling changes to the kill pill that would loosen safety standards. The report mentioned concerns that:

• “FDA may only be aware of a fraction of adverse events associated with Mifeprex. There are anecdotal examples of adverse events, such as severe bleeding, that may not be reported as such or that may be interpreted by emergency health care providers as a natural miscarriage. Underreporting may get worse under the revised Mifeprex label, which eliminates the follow-up visit and does not require prescribers to report nonfatal adverse events.”

• “Concerns have also been raised about FDA's oversight of the drug since approval, including the agency's response to deaths in U.S. women who had taken the drug.”

• “FDA may not have reliable data on the number of women who have used Mifeprex, which would affect the denominator for tracking adverse events. With an unclear denominator, FDA may not have an accurate measure of adverse event rates associated with Mifeprex.”

• “Even with additional dispensings beginning in 2012, FDA officials said there were still insufficient data captured to enable a robust safety assessment.”

It is worth mentioning that due to a voluntary reporting system for abortion deaths, we have no idea how many more of these cases there are. Even after reports of Tina and Toni’s deaths and thousands of dangerous events, safety requirements for the lethal pills were still loosened. The decision to remove some of the safety standards was catastrophic and was eventually overturned, but many died in the meantime.

(Please note that the date given is only the date that the FDA found out about her death. She may have died sooner, possibly even years before, but the faulty reporting system sometimes registers deaths far after they actually happen.)

[mitigatedchaos]

You Won't "Beat Trump at His Own Game"

Post for July 8, 2024 5,500 words, 25 mins

[ @morlock-holmes ]

Like, can you guys imagine Donald Trump ever admitting that he lost a debate? Let alone imagine his party *withdrawing him as nominee* because of it? And we're going to beat him at his own game by, uh, doing literally the exact opposite of his game?

[ mitigatedchaos ]

Your plan is to beat Trump by being better at being Trump than Trump is? Damn, son. You got a Texas oil baron lined up or something?

-★-

I watched the first hour of the debate. At one point the moderator asked Trump about abortion. As the Republican candidate, this is a tricky question for him, since evangelical voters would like abortion banned in most cases (and thus presumably every state). Trump then argued that he was leaving it up to the states, and the states would decide. He says that he agrees that the abortion pill should be legal, and agrees with the court ruling in favor of it, and that he supports the exceptions for rape, incest, and health of the mother. Further, he's against third trimester and 'post-birth abortion.'

While banning most first trimester abortion only has 38% support, banning most third trimester abortion has 80% supermajority support. The views of the median voter are in tension: they don't want to force women to have babies they don't want, but they also don't want to kill babies.

Biden stumbles in his delivery of his canned line in response, which appeared to be based on the idea that strict limits on abortion access would de facto nullify the exceptions.

Democrats have repeatedly lied about abortion. Republicans have repeatedly lied about abortion. The whole argument about 'after-birth' abortions appears to be based on political fencing with bills, which Democrats also do. (Something like the classic, "Oh, sure, it's illegal, but will you make it super double illegal? Oh, you won't? That means you support it, then.")

(I should note, at the time, I wrote, "I don't think Americans should trust a single word either of these guys is saying.")

But later, Biden trips over Roe v. Wade and the three trimesters to the point that it's unclear just what the hell he means.

The main CNN video doesn't support comments, but there's a clip that does. The top comment?

we're fucked as a nation

In my opinion, these comments overall agree with my post...

Man, both of these men are so old and tired, though Biden is the older and tireder of the two. ... This guy's like a cat with 6 months to live.

It isn't that Biden "lost" the debate, as in he morally failed to engage in enough preparation. The man is simply too old; no amount of preparation would have worked.

-★-

With the abortion argument, we get a good example of Trump's pattern of exaggeration: "Everybody wanted to get it back to the states. Every legal scholar, all over the world. The most respected."

There was a substantive debate about this, and in fact there were a number of legal scholars that believed that the issue was, on a legal basis, on shaky ground. This was a common argument over the past two decades. There was not a complete, unanimous consensus.

People talk about Trump lying a lot. For a lot of that, I think they have this sort of thing in mind, but I don't take it all that seriously. This is salesman lying. He is trying to sell you a Trump steak.

Each message has a [social] component and a [content] component. Trump is weighting the [content] component lower, making it less accurate, but the [social] component lacks tactical depth.

I think this gets into some sort of personality conflict.

All politicians lie. They put on a nice suit, tell you some flowery speech, and then go bomb some country in the middle east. Obama was a genius at public speaking, like Hollywood President tier, but the drone war continued.

So, to make up an example (that's less controversial), a regular politician will start talking about "the human dignity" of guys that break into cars, or something, and the initial language will be quite empathetic. But rather than going where this is supposed to go, and improving the quality and safety of the prisons, they'll get you to agree to this nice-sounding language as part of a multi-step maneuver, and then they won't fix the prisons, and they won't properly rehabilitate the guys that break into the cars, and they'll just... release them, to break into your car.

So if someone starts talking about "human dignity," I start looking for where they hid the knife. (I also consider their personal record; I'm willing to entertain that they're serious, but I have to see the evidence of pragmatism first.)

Trump comes in and he starts talking about how, "All the legal scholars agree with me, all over the world. The most prestigious." This translates to, "I'm popular. I make great decisions. Vote for me."

It's so crass that it has a tactical depth of like, one. It's not part of some long and complicated chain. There is no sophisticated ideological permission structure being setup. He's not trying to redefine the language. There is no second maneuver.

So to me, this feels safe.

I'm not expecting to be attacked from some high-level social plane or whatever, so I can relax. This man is a salesman. A lot of what he says is bullshit, but he just wants to sell me something.

I know it's bullshit. He knows it's bullshit. He knows I know it's bullshit. But this deception is so unsophisticated that it loops back around to being somewhat honest, or even friendly. (It's like if you had a mandatory prison gang fight, and technically, they have to "fight" you, but they're not really trying.) Obviously it results in a lower rate of information transmission, though. (What will he actually do? It can be hard to say.)

This is not the same as "lock her up," from Trump's 2016 campaign against Hillary Clinton. That was concerning, and in fact in the 2016 election I voted for Clinton. But then, he didn't follow through on that.

-★-

Thinking from the other direction, why would someone find the general, "we have the best cows," approach to be disconcerting rather than just annoying? (The Wall was kinda also like that. It's just a big, dumb object.)

Well, if you're used to everything having three layers of social misdirection in order to protect everyone's reputations and social position, and using this to demonstrate loyalty to others, maybe the crass rhetoric makes it sound like anything could be up for sale, with enough votes.

So you're supposed to say the stuff that your network socially agree sounds nice, and if you aren't saying the stuff, that might mean you're planning to coordinate to do something bad. (Why aren't you following the network? Do you think you're better than other people? Sounds like you might be planning to subordinate others.)

But the actual content of the messages doesn't get properly evaluated.

To quote some swing voters from the famous Reddit "sanewashing" post:

Only one participant here agrees we should "defund the police." One woman says "That is crazier than anything Trump has ever said." 50% of people here say they think Biden was privately sympathetic to the position. We are explaining the actual policies behind defund the police. One woman interrupts "that is not what defund the police means, I'm sorry. It means they want to defund the police." "I didn't like being lied to about this over and over again" says another woman. "Don't try and tell word don't mean what they say" she continues. Rest of group nodding heads.

During the early part of the 2014-2022 era, when we had the feminist push, there was a term called "mansplaining," intended to mean roughly "a men condescendingly explaining things to a woman."

In discussion with each other, men may try to assess who is the most knowledgeable or sharpest (in order to lead the discussion), so they may throw a piece of information out there like it's a tennis ball, and they expect you to hit it back. So a man might tell a woman about a book that she wrote, and then expect her to respond with some insight about the passage he was discussing.

From what I've seen, among men this is social statusy, but it's not like, hardcore. From some women, we got tweets along the lines of, "How dare he lecture me about my own book! Does he think he knows better than me about the book I wrote myself?!" It's basically mismatched systems of etiquette. (An autistic woman might have powered through and info dumped about the book to the man anyway until he got tired of the topic, and perceived no insult.)

This was a triple failure.

First, the men did not realize that the women (this kind of woman) have different discursive norms from men, and adapt in a way that makes them feel more comfortable in mixed spaces.

Second, the women did not realize that this was not a male plot to subordinate women. Feminists connected this etiquette mismatch to a larger ideological construct ("patriarchy"). Some of them are probably still angry to this day.

Third, the two groups largely did not reach a mutual understanding on this issue, except for a few honest people (and people less prone to viewing the opposite sex adversarially) in small spaces, coming into maturity.

Which is to say, in this clash of norms, the view based on multiple layers of social indirection as a form of politeness may be socially astute within its own culture, but may be socially maladapted outside of that culture.

Because these social norms are social, they are a product of a local social equilibrium rather than a more universalist analysis, which in practice makes them more particular. Compare economic or scientific ideas, which, while they exist in a social context, have a non-social framework for discovery and resolution.

I don't find it that difficult to understand the median voter wanting first trimester abortion to be legal and third trimester abortion to be illegal.

In the same way, to the median voter and not just conservatives, a slogan like "defund the police" means "defund the police." A lot of the more confrontational slogans produced by this process sound positively unhinged to outsiders - in a way that makes Donald Trump seem normal by comparison.

-★-

There are a good number of right-wing grifters who are out there regularly lying. I don't post much about them, because they just aren't that interesting. The field of politics is constantly shifting, anyway.

But I think it's worth considering how Democrats got into this situation.

To pick another Trump example, some readers may have seen this 2018 video of Trump telling Germany they're too dependent on imported Russian natural gas, and the German delegation smiling at him.

I vaguely recall that this was part of a Trump push to sell more liquefied natural gas from the US to the Europeans.

Of course, Russia did expand their war with Ukraine in 2022. At the time, Germany was importing 55% of their natural gas from Russia.

Brookings interviewed some economists about how the results went down. Russia cut down on gas supplies into Europe in 2021, reducing the amount of stored gas in Germany by the expansion of the war in early 2022. They raised and lowered the amount of gas coming in to Germany until the explosion of the Nord Stream pipeline in mid 2022.

So it's likely that Putin's Russia were, in fact, trying to gain leverage over Germany. Estimates from industry CEOs predicted a major recession.

The economists predicted that the situation would be expensive, but manageable, and the damage to Germany's economy was less than expected. Why?

First, the demand for gas was not perfectly inelastic. The dire predictions were based on gas as a bottleneck causing a cascade of missing production inputs ("for want of a bolt, the bulldozer is lost; for want of a bulldozer, the factory is lost; for want of a factory..." one might say). It turned out that it was possible to substitute at multiple points in the production process, so more gas-intensive components could be imported if needed. (As the war was in Ukraine, Germany was not blockaded.)

Second, gas was imported from other sources, including Norway... and liquefied natural gas from the US. (A second source claims that 5-6% of the gas is still coming from Russia.)

Third, the disruption was already on the horizon from 2021, so it was easier to coordinate actors.

So was Trump right? Was he wrong?

Germany was getting about 26% of its energy from natural gas in 2021. If 55% of that is from Russia, that makes for about 14% of Germany's energy supply, not including imported Russian oil. As of 2014, Russian troops were already occupying Crimea.

What I want to argue is that, less than right or wrong, "Getting ≥14% of your energy from a powerful geopolitical rival, particularly one currently engaged in a military occupation just two countries away, gives them potential leverage, and this makes it risky," is obvious.

Going, "Haha, look at this ignorant buffoon who thinks that Putin might exploit providing us with 1/8th of our energy for leverage," is just... It's cringe.

Germany had to reactivate their coal power plants to deal with the energy crisis, but they still had coal power plants to reactivate. The long-term storage problem for renewables hasn't been resolved yet. If they had an energy economy that was 60% natural gas, 40% renewables, and 0% nuclear, they'd be in an even worse spot.

(Lately it looks like people are making a stab at sucking CO2 out of the air and converting it to fuel. Will that be online as a replacement in 2030? That's harder to say. It would be fortunate, because combustible fuels don't have the same security concerns as fission power.)

-★-

Anyhow, that was all background.

How did Democrats get into this mess?

Well, obviously Democrats and left-leaning people in the media made a huge deal of Trump as the exception, Trump as the risk, Trump as would-be dictator, Trump as the erosion of norms, and so on. And of course, the Covid-19 pandemic landed on Trump's term and was very abnormal.

The point of running Joe Biden, from the perspective of the median voter, was a "return to normalcy." This is what voters were telling them by picking the pre-Trump Vice President from Obama's term.

After Trump got in and stopped caring about pursuing Hillary Clinton, I found it hard to buy the idea of Trump as an emergency.

Democrats always seemed to use "Trump is an emergency" as an excuse to behave in worse ways. For example, Democrats argued that protests against lockdowns of community centers like churches were too dangerous to be allowed due to the risk of spreading the virus, but then argued that nation-wide race riots needed to be allowed and that this was the position of 'science' as an institution.

Did the race riots accomplish anything of value? No. The opportunity for normal police reform was squandered on braindead slogans like "Defund the Police," which swing voters think are insane. There was a significant increase in homicide, and this is before accounting for significantly-improved trauma surgery since 1990. If LA is any indication, most of the victims of the increase in homicide were black and hispanic.

They complained constantly about Trump eroding institutional norms... and then eroded institutional norms. By 2022, trust in mass media among independents and Republicans collapsed to 27% and 14% respectively.

This is going to be a long-term problem; conspiracy theories are proliferating due to a lack of trust in sense-making institutions, and sense-making institutions have had their reputations shredded by wasteful partisan behavior that barely moved the needle electorally.

One way to assess how much someone values something is to ask what they're willing to give up to get it. Ask any Democrat on Twitter - what concessions are they willing to make to the rest of America to ensure Trump doesn't get back into office? The answer is none.

A "return to normalcy" would mean using the racial identitarians as expendable shock troops and then dropping them after the election, not getting shut down by the courts for doing "race conscious" policy.

The administration would quietly make changes to shore up the practical (not mere messaging) legitimacy of the institutions in order to cover for the spent legitimacy from the Trump era and run a boring administration focused on policies with supermajority support.

So now Democrats are the weird theater kids, and Trump is the normal guy. (And he's already been President, so publishing a magazine cover calling him Hitler just comes off as hysterics.)

-★-

Why did this happen?

First, as the guy that won the election, Joe Biden is the primary guy with the political capital to reshape the Democratic coalition's priorities. In 2020, Joe Biden had the same problem he has in 2024: he's too old.

There is no Democrat strategic command to impose discipline on the coalition members. There are lots of factions all fighting each other to pursue policy that's aligned with their own interests rather than the national interest, and it's resulting in what I call a coalitional interest deadlock. (For a relatively uncontroversial example, Left-NIMBYs and boneheaded environmentalists oppose housing construction, while pro-immigrationists bring in millions of people... who, when they get here, would need housing. One of these two factions needs to lose.)

Nasty identitarian rhetoric requires no immediate material concessions from these factions, nor does it require any discipline, so we get nasty identitarian rhetoric that does not benefit the country in any way, and is not connected to positive programs (that would require actual work and limiting claims to what's realistic, which defeats the point).

Some of you are probably familiar with the idea of a "leveraged buyout." This is when a private equity firm buys a company with debt, and then typically put it on the balance sheet of the company they just bought out. A firm with too much debt is said to be "overleveraged."

The second problem is that Democrats are epistemically overleveraged. They are making too many bets based on incomplete information, and a lot of the assumptions they're making in the process are not accurate.

Some tech-related online right-wingers believed that mass schooling was having almost no effect on learning or performance, and that it was almost entirely just selecting for conscientiousness and intelligence.

Learning losses from online schooling during the pandemic showed that mass schooling was having an effect - by removing it.

However, in researching the literature on education shortly before the pandemic, I found that getting educational results beyond what schools were achieving was very difficult, and that many educational interventions would fade out. Charter schools only produced modestly better results (for about the same price), in a way I couldn't differentiate from selection effects on parents. (I did find that online charters performed horribly. Well, I guess that's one finding verified by a larger-scale experiment.)

It isn't a matter of funding. Baltimore schools are highly funded and get terrible results.

We lack means to convert funding into results.

(Roland Fryer reportedly managed to beat the average for one class, but as a sign of things to come, he got politically sidelined in 2019. Naturally, he's an economist.)

Line voter Democrats are likely to claim that sub-par US school results are due to underfunding. The condition of scientific institutions is not as bad as right-wingers think it is; researchers know that just blindly slapping more funding on to education won't work. However, the guys in between, the 'officers' of the Democratic coalition, are quite happy to leave the line voters in the dark.

They're probably patting themselves on the back, thinking, "I should leave out the most damaging information in order to protect the weak and marginalized," and then not accounting for the possibility that everyone else in their information chain is doing the same thing.

Because of this, we don't get a more serious conversation that would establish a better method to convert funding into results. (This applies to other domains as well. Public transit in the US is ruinously expensive to construct, particularly in CA and NYC. A "car tax" without the ability to practically construct public transit is just a hateful punishment.)

When a Democrat is talking about "beating Trump at his own game," for example, by pretending that Biden did OK at the debate, this is generally of the form, "we should be more aggressive, deceptive, and selfish."

The Democrats are already too deceptive. It's inhibiting their ability to govern effectively. The Democrats are already too aggressive. A number of the online right being read by Chris Rufo and Elon Musk were once self-identified liberals [1] who were driven away and radicalized by the hostile messaging (which was not connected to practical benefits for society, so this isn't "mere selfishness"). Democrats are already selfish enough; forgiving student debt without fixing the system to reduce the origin of that debt polls 30-40 approve-disapprove.

And for the debate itself...

Bro why do we have 70+ year old[s] running for office? Shouldn't we have someone at least young and more modern? This is like watching a retirement home cafeteria fight 😭

Do you think telling someone like that, "Biden didn't lose the debate," sounds, you know, hinged? At the very least, it certainly doesn't inspire trust or confidence.

-★-

A little while ago, collapsedsquid posted:

Seeing a lot of the "This Trump thing is because everyone was so unfair to Romney in 2012 and he lost" out there again and this is fucking abuser logic man, "Why did you make me hit you? If you'd only put away the dishes like I'd asked then this wouldn't have had to happen" shut the fuck up man.

I had been writing a draft response to this.

Basically, seriousness is both a substantive position and a rhetorical stance. The Bush administration undermined the rhetorical stance on the Republican side due to the Iraq War, which was mismanaged, and in which no nuclear weapons were found. (Some old chemical weapons were found, but not an actual development program.)

Throwing the line "binders full of women" at Mitt Romney didn't help, of course, but it's more like that faction of the Republican party failed to regain its footing.

During the Bush administration, there were comparisons of George Bush to Hitler (it showed up on protest signs, for instance).

In practice, the Bush administration were libcons. Looking at Afghanistan, a mountainous, dry, landlocked country that has a GDP per capita of around $500, they were neither 'anti-racist' enough to decide not to invade and respect the local rule of the Taliban (and their local cultural traditions), nor conventionally racist (or culturalist) enough to conclude that national development would be a tremendous challenge requiring a radical reorganization of Afghan society.

Utilitarianism is generally about maximizing "utility," or subjective positive experience, and assumes that this can be summed across individuals. For example, there is a utilitarian thought experiment in which a surgeon has one healthy patient and five sick patients. If he kills the healthy patient, then he can harvest the man's organs in order to save the five sick patients. (Yes, like in Rimworld.)

There are many problems with a naive utilitarian approach.

However, if we rotate the concept of utilitarianism, we get the idea of moral prices, and morality as something that can be traded off against other factors of production, such as land, labor, energy, capital, and so on. Morality is not like these other resources; immorality can incentivize more immorality. However, this provides us with a potential frame with which to view a more violent and exploitative past.

One way to view the situation is that a radical reorganization of Afghanistan would be morally intensive, not just financially draining.

For example, Afghanistan has a high rate of cousin marriage, which is not common in developed countries. Overriding that would mean prioritizing foreign marriage norms as superior, taking on epistemic debt as the relationship between marriage norms and democracy or economy is more correlative than rock-solid causative, and to the degree that Afghan people resist this change, enforcing it at gunpoint.

While Democratic voters of the era would joke about Republican-voting "rednecks" being cousin-married, the appetite for such a program likely did not exist.

Another way to view the situation is that, from the outside, the Bush administration believed that democracy, rule of law, economic productivity, and women's liberation, were simply what happens in the absence of dictatorship. This view legitimized American power and influence as simply the natural order asserting itself, and argued that asserting American influence was morally cheap.

If democracy, rule of law, economic productivity, and women's liberation are non-trivially the product of particular cultural norms and values, then American interventionism is much more morally expensive.

In either case, Trump represents a "correction" in reaction to the failed project of the Bush administration: conflict and oppression are still undesirable; bombs are morally expensive; borders are cheap.

-★-

As we know, the United States lost the war in Afghanistan to the Taliban. A joke emerged at the time:

"Now the Taliban have to govern Afghanistan."

Discussion in right-wing circles claims that the Taliban won by doing a better job of maintaining basic property rights and resolving disputes than the US-aligned forces did, despite being in a state of war with the US:

The short answer is that they auditioned to replace the state across the spectrum of control — including punitive violence, but also the pedestrian tasks of recordkeeping and adjudication and governance. They wove their legitimacy into ordinary people’s water rights, their inheritances, their personal disputes — so that even people who were indifferent to the Taliban’s ideological program became invested in the Taliban’s stability and growth.

There were, reportedly, complaints from members of the Taliban after their victory, but it would seem that the Taliban were already governing Afghanistan.

Richard Hanania may be a troll, but he went through some Afghan War documents posted by the Washington Post, and I don't think he's making it up. It would seem that while the Taliban were governing Afghanistan, the US forces, well, weren't:

Six months after he was appointed, Bush didn't know who his top general in Afghanistan was, and didn't care. General McNeill had no guidance about what he should be doing in the country.

He has a whole long thread of this sort of thing. It reminds me of reading through the Wikipedia page on the Vietnam War many years after high school history, which made it sound like the US was quite adept with high-technology weapons, but failed to properly identify and manage the political source for the conflict.

Let's return to the student loan debt forgiveness issue.

A typical firm only has a profit margin of about 7-10%. A firm can keep going as long as it's breaking even, so even a low profit margin can still pay wages. However, if a firm is losing money, it will have to sell off assets or lay off employees, reducing its production capacity.

There is investment, in which we spend current production in order to increase or maintain future production, such as by building a factory. If we make a good investment, we'll get the production value back later. There is insurance, which involves moving risk around. For example, you are unlikely to be in a car accident most of the time, but if you have car insurance and you do get in an accident, the insurance company will pay for repair or replacement of your car. [2] This may make you more likely to buy a car in the first place, or more likely to structure your life around the assumption that you will have a car.

Governments can (in theory) spend a great deal on investment or insurance, but they can only spend a more limited amount on consumption spending.

For a college degree that pays for itself, government can loan money at a low interest rate, and the value will be paid back by the person who took the loan later.

For a college degree that doesn't pay for itself, someone has to supply the production that builds the buildings on the campus, fixes the water pipes, reloads the toilet paper in the bathrooms, and so on, and if that's not "the person taking the degree, but in the future," then it has to be someone else.

Someone like collapsedsquid might have the view, "I want the state to subsidize college education. Why should I pre-compromise and reduce my negotiating position?"

To expand on this, "Guarding the state treasury is the work of the right and of capital (business); why should I do their work for them?"

From this perspective, the role of the Democratic presidential candidate is to be the leader of America's left-leaning coalition, the blue team.

But the median voter or swing voter does not necessarily have this perspective. The median or swing voter is choosing between two candidates to lead the American enterprise.

The actual job is President of the United States.

If you win the War in Afghanistan, you have to govern Afghanistan. If you win the US presidential election, you have to govern the United States of America.

That's the prize. If you don't like it, don't run for office.

-★-

Nonetheless, this causes a tension. In order to become President as a Democrat, you first have to win the Democratic primary, which makes you effectively the leader of the Democratic party.

How do you deal with this?

That's "simple": split the issues.

A political coalition has a lot of people and those people have diverse interests. Representing them all at once is too difficult. Talking about them all at once is too difficult. Generalization of coalitional interests into a smaller, more manageable set of principles yields ideology.

Take the issues, and order them by how important they are to the functioning of the country, and how important they are for mainstream voters.

For the issues most important to mainstream voters, aim for a very broad coalition using very general principles. Pass legislation that has supermajority support in the polls, and be loud about it so that voters know what you've done for them lately.

For more niche issues that mainstream voters care less about, aim for a narrower coalition with narrower principles, to reward your base.

The second is the reward for the first. The median voter should be able to trust you on the things that he cares about, and where he doesn't trust you, it's on things he doesn't care about.

Core issues for the functioning of the country will seep into more generic voter dissatisfaction with things like inflation, so it's better to keep on top of those. Whether to be loud about it depends on whether the individual policy that's actually needed has good optics or not.

-★-

If you want to "beat Trump at his own game," you don't do so by talking about how America has the best steaks.

You identify his most important issues, and then you work out how to best steal them from him.

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[1] "They were elves, once." Extradeadjcb is probably the most prominent example, but it comes up for a number of them. I've written about this before, but ethnic conflict theory by one player creates an equilibrium more favorable to ethnic conflict theory by other players. Lefty Twitter users asked Razib Khan why he attended Extradeadjcb's natalism conference; he replied by asking where the left-wing natalism conference was. That's probably still 20 years out.

[2] It's more complicated than this.

[srebrnafh]

Today and tomorrow our Parliament is discussing reproductive rights.

Currently, in Poland, abortion is legally banned, except for a tiny number of cases (risk to woman's life, and criminal origin) and even then, this is questioned, delayed, ignored.

There are now four drafted legal changes on the table:

centrist-right - go back to what used to be called "abortion compromise" which adds to the above, also the fetal health reason (so, if the fetus is terminally malformed, the pregnancy could be terminated; currently THIS IS NOT ALLOWED)

centrist-leftish-somewhat & left-wing - two versions that cover legal, no-reason-needed abortion up to week 12 with certain other reasons for later stages (eg. diagnosed fetal abnormality); these two have huge overlap, with leftist being more liberal in certain aspects

left-wing additional proposal of decriminalisation of help (eg selling abortion pills, providing money for termination abroad etc); which currently is penalised with 3 years of prison, absolute.

And there are also the right-wing fucks who right now spew their "tiny hands" and "beating hearts" and "killing babies" and all this crap. Good thing we have a strict time limit in these cases, or they would drown us in murderous sacharine.

We've marched, and we've screamed and we've voted the cretins out. Now we have a chance to get abortion rights voted into law.

Keep your fingers crossed for Polish women.