#aaron taylor johnson x black reader

[anjaelle]

White Light | Part VIII

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Pairing: Ghost!Aaron Taylor-Johnson x Black!Reader Warnings: DEATH, BLOOD, mentions of drug use. Graphic depiction of death. Word Count: 2.3K Summary: Darkness falls... A/N: Two chapters left.

[Part I] | [Part II] | [Part III] | [Part IV] | [Part V] | [Part VI] | [Part VII] | [Part IX] | [☁Masterpost ☁] | [♫The Crimson Zombies Mixtape ♫]

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When he ran his fingers over the guitar strings, you could see the longing in his eyes and in the clench of his jaw. You knew very little about instruments. You saw it collecting dust in the corner of a thrift shop, lonely and in desperate need of repair, and you took it. You didn't even know if he'd be able to use it. If he could take it to the other side with him when he inevitably left.

None of that mattered to you. You just knew he'd need it. When it came back to you, repaired and good as new, you rushed home to give it to him.

"I know you said you played bass," you rushed to say as he grasped the guitar neck in shaking hands, "But I also remember you saying that you used to play guitar too. At least for a little while. And...yeah..."

"Why?" He asked, softly, cradling the guitar like it was a newborn in his hands.

"I don't know," you admitted, "I just figured I'd--you needed something good. Just for once."

He swallowed hard, and let out a short laugh before running his fingers through his curls and turning away.

"It's so...wow. I mean...Shit."

You fidgeted with your fingers as he took a moment to collect his thoughts, unsure of what to say next. And as he turned to you again, golden hour washed over you both, casting you in a warm glow that made him seem more alive than you'd ever seen him.

"Thank you." His voice cracked, and he cleared his throat then laughed, "I need to re-learn how to play this thing. It's been a while."

You watched the mirth dance across his face and leaned against the windowsill in satisfaction, "Mhm. Because you owe me a song for my troubles. Maybe even two."

In the blink of an eye, he pulled you in for a deep kiss, cradling your face in his warm hands. His thumbs swept across the apples of your cheeks before his hands slipped down to the back of your neck, down your shoulders, your chest, and finally slipping around your waist to pull you in closer. You didn't remember draping your arms around his shoulders, or curling your fingers in his dark curls. Like muscle memory. Like in another life you'd done it a million times.

He pulled away only to pepper your face with more kisses, something you felt like he'd wanted to do for so long by how his hands grabbed your hips.

"I'll write you a library of music." He breathlessly said, kissing you again, "Whatever you want."

─ ·𖥸· ─

You stared at the stained wood floor, numb to the reality of what you've just discovered. It felt like the old, brown stain was growing in width, crawling towards you like you called to it. The ringing in your ears, and the sharp, shallow breaths you took nearly drowned out the sound of the intercom when it rang.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" You asked him, finally forcing yourself to look directly into his face and not at what remained of his body spilled onto the floor. He looked...sick. Pale. Very much dead. And it startled you. How many times had you both walked over this spot. Could he feel it underneath the layers of varnish and paint? If he could, he hid it well. But judging by the way he worked his jaw and avoided eye contact with you, you didn't think he knew any better than you about what the landlord may have done.

You asked again, "Aaron, are you sure you want to do this?"

His eyes flickered over to you, dull and lifeless, before refocusing on the stain, "Yeah."

The intercom rang again and you hesitated before pressing the buzzer to let the visitor in. You could almost hear your heart thrumming in your ears as the footsteps creaked on the staircase and echoed down the hall.

You tried to practice what you'd say when they finally arrived, but you weren't entirely sure if it was worth it to rehearse. After all, you'd probably sound like a crazy person.

It was worth a try.

A heavy knuckle rapped against the door, pulling you from your thoughts as suddenly as you slipped into them. You shot another glance at him, and then dragged yourself to the door. And as your hand hesitated over the doorknob, Aaron cleared his throat behind you.

"Do it. I need to know."

You nodded and took a deep breath before pulling the door open. Danny--Aaron's childhood friend, former bandmate, and one of the last people to see him alive--looked you over with a furrowed brow of concern.

"Shit, love, you look like death."

You felt like death.

You forced a faint smile that instantly fell and you shook your head in an effort to get your thoughts together. What little thoughts you had, anyway.

"I...this isn't going to be easy. I couldn't really tell you over the phone. So thank you for coming."

You took a step back to allow him into your space. He seemed to pause before crossing the threshold. You could imagine it was a surreal experience to be in a place you made so many memories in, so long ago.

"It feels the same. Though you're loads neater than we all were." He chuckled softly to himself, lost in his memories for a moment, "Do you still have that one burner on the stove that you need to kinda rev up to get going?"

You smiled at that. Mildly annoyed that the landlord never bothered to change the kitchen in 20 years but also mildly charmed by the idea that you and your visitor had another thing in common with one another.

"Yeah, I hate it. I try to avoid using it as often as possible."

"We did too," he added wistfully. You could see his eyes starting to water, and he turned away to collect himself. "Is this gonna be a tough chat?"

You wanted to say no. Maybe spare the inevitable pain his close friend would feel in having to relive the night--and the follow up--all over again. But then you glanced over at Aaron standing at the window, still and closed off like an old Gothic statue of a biblical martyr. This wasn't about you. This wasn't even about Danny. You straightened your back and forced the words out.

"I found his blood. On...on the floor. A-and the windowsill." You shakily admitted aloud for the first time. You saw him visibly stiffen at the admission, and his eyes widened.

"Who's blood?"

"Aaron's. I found it."

"He's playing dumb," Aaron suddenly said, beside you, "he knows what happened. Ask him."

You weren't sure if he saw your eyes flicker to the space beside you registering everything the unseen entity was saying.

Danny shoved his hands in his pockets, anxiously, "How do you know it's his?"

You took a deep breath, steeling your nerves, and asked pointedly, "How did he die, Danny? What happened that night?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because he's here." You plainly stated, motioning beside you at the shape he couldn't see.

He gave you a strange look, and sneered at you, "You're sick. You're fucking sick, and this is a terrible thing to do."

Aaron rolled his eyes, "He's so full of shit."

"Fine ask me something only Aaron would know. Since I'm supposedly a liar, it'd be easy to prove wouldn't it?" You calmly asked.

"I'm not entertaining this." He grumbled, turning to leave.

"Tell him that you know he stupidly bought drugs off some guy in an alley in California and accidentally snorted fiberglass and baby powder after the Berkley show. I was the only one that sat in the waiting room for him."

"He did WHAT?" You blurted out.

"What?" He turned again, looking at you like you had three heads. You briefly glanced at Aaron again, who motioned for you to share what he said.

"Um..." you swallowed, slightly disturbed by the new information you were given, "He says you accidentally snorted fiberglass and baby powder after the Berkley show? And that none of your friends waited in the hospital for you but him?"

His eye twitched and you felt like he might yell at you, instead he took a deep breath, "Who told you about that? It was fuckin' Natalia wasn't it?"

For fucks sake.

"I've never even met Talia, but I know she was there that night wasn't she? Come on, help me out here."

He stared at you for an uncomfortably long time.

"Who are you?"

You chose to ignore that question, "I know there was an argument that night, Gavin hit him over the head, and he was dead after that. What. Happened. That. Night?"

Danny sighed and took a step towards you, "You know, I hadn't thought about Gavin in ages. Not until he died, anyway. Overdose. Not surprising, but still sad all the same. We separated on pretty bad terms. He got too big, decided he didn't need us. I make the effort to talk to his kids at least once a week, even though he was a piece of shit in the end. Talia took it hard. But even then, I rarely thought about Gavin."

"From what I heard, he was hard to be around sometimes," you said. Aaron snorted, leaning up against the wall.

Danny quirked a brow at you, "From what you heard?"

"He's in denial," Aaron sighed. "Can't say I blame him. I didn't believe in that crazy ghost shit either. But, y'know, here we are."

Danny glanced in Aaron's direction like he heard him, but you were sure he couldn't have. The younger man pushed himself off the wall and walked up to Danny, circling him in examination. You saw his shoulders visibly tense.

"I told you, Aaron is literally here." You carefully reiterated, motioning to where he was standing.

"What else has he told you?" Danny asked.

"That he was in love with Talia, that Gavin was jealous. Considering how things turned out, I guess he wasn't too far off with that assumption." You tried to hide the hint of shameful jealousy in your voice. "I assumed that's why Gavin killed him."

He said nothing. Aaron sidled up beside you, looking him over suspiciously.

"He's acting weird." He murmured.

"You think Gavin killed him over a girl?" Danny plainly asked.

"I think things like that are sadly very common. Jealousy, drugs, money, love. People will kill for a number of things." You subconsciously found yourself taking a small step back.

The red-headed older man sighed deeply, "I loved Aaron, man. I know I said I didn't think that much about Gavin before he finally fucked off to Hell or wherever he ended up. But I think about Aaron every day. He was the one that taught me how to write sheet music, y'know? I'm still not very good. I try though." He scratched the back of his head. You were having a hard time following the conversation, "We knew we were fucked. The minute it happened--when he stopped moving--we knew...what the fuck were we gonna do? It was so stupid. Just an accident."

"Accidents happen." You carefully whispered, taking another small step back. His eyes caught the movement.

"Accidents do happen. All the time. But our apartment was filled with drugs, we were about to get our biggest break yet, we had so much to lose. I--we loved the guy. We did. But we could always get another bassist."

Your heart sank, "Why would you do that to him? Your own friend?"

"Don't act so self-righteous. Have you ever had anything to lose? Have you ever been desperate?" Danny took a step towards you, "Have you ever been hungry? You do what you need to."

Alarm signals went off in your head, and Aaron appeared behind him, "You need to leave. Now."

It didn't make sense to you, "If it was an accident, why hide it? Why not just admit what happened?"

Your words died in your throat when you noticed how close he was standing to you. Your blood ran ice cold, paralyzing you in fear you'd never felt before. You locked eyes with Aaron over his shoulder as he leaned over you.

"Then again," you whispered, "I could be wrong. It could just be a mistake--"

It felt like you'd been punched in the stomach. You wondered why he would do that to you when he was so much larger than you? When you'd been so nice to him? When you both loved Aaron as much as you did?

Then the pain doubled. You clutched your stomach just as he pulled the blade out, and your hands were covered in blood. You didn't register Aaron screaming for you and pushing Danny into a table across the room, or the sound of breaking wood and glass.

Your knees buckled under you, your vision darkened. You tried to drag yourself across the floor. To what? You weren't sure. You just wanted the pain to stop. You wanted someone to find you and make everything better.

You thought of your grandmother, your friends, and your parents. And as the blurry visage of Aaron appeared in front of you, you started to cry.

"Please, please, please. I don't want to die," you tried to say as your vision blurred.

If he was saying anything you couldn't understand it. You felt yourself struggling to breathe, you tasted blood on your tongue.

This couldn't be it. This couldn't be how you fucking died. You were angry. So angry that you could scream and punch the floor.

And then...

He grabbed you in his arms, and you were falling. Through the floor. Through the veil that separated you from the rest of the world.

Into darkness that enveloped you both.

[mezsygfs]

I love how I can scroll on tiktok, see a random ass tiktok and open the comment section n see a bunch of marauders fans basically claiming the video. "this is so Sirius" "omg it's wolfstar" "Jilly core" y'all are iconic. Please never stop.

[petitemistletoe]

Tutor

Pairing: James Potter x Reader

Warnings: smut, angst

Word Count: 3.2K+

“Mr. Potter, I’d like to talk to you about something,” Professor McGonagall called from her desk as everyone was filing out. James had to stifle a groan as he exchanged a look with Sirius before making his way to the professor’s desk. It was his last class before dinner on a Friday and he was starving and wanting to get pissed with the marauders. 

“Yes Professor?” He asked, hoping he didn’t sound too eager to leave. 

“Your grades this past year have slipped, Mr. Potter. You’re a very talented wizard but I’m afraid this year you’ve become more focused on Quidditch than your studies.” Professor McGonagall gave James a disapproving look over her glasses. 

“Oh yes, it’s been a bit of adjustment now that I’m captain but I’m confident we’ll crush Slytherin in the tournament.” James said eagerly. 

“Mr. Potter you are not listening. If you do not get your grades up you will not be allowed to play.” McGonagall sighed and took off her glasses. “You know there is nothing more I would enjoy than watching my house win the Quidditch cup. Now, I’ve found a tutor for you to help you in your area of weakness: potions.”

“Moony? Evans?” James asked hopefully. 

“No.” McGonagall shook her head. “You have a potions exam in two weeks. If you are able to get an A or above you will be permitted to play.”

“I can’t believe you have to have a tutor! It’s inhumane!” Sirius protested after James explained everything over dinner.

“It’s just tutoring, Sirius,” Remus said with an eyeroll, “Who’s tutoring you anyway? Evans?”

“I wish. McGonagall didn’t mention who. I’m supposed to be in the library tomorrow at ten in the morning.”

“Ten! On a Saturday? Inhumane!” Sirius repeated. Then he looked down the table and called, “Oi! Evans! Why aren’t you tutoring Prongs in potions?”

“Tell the whole hall why don’t you?” James grumbled, laying his down on the table. 

“What?” Lily looked over at the boys with an already bewildered expression. “I’m tutoring a second year Hufflepuff in Transfiguration tomorrow.”

“Are you failing potions, James?” Mary chuckled. “Not failing,” James said, not moving his head from the table, “but I need to be doing better.”

“Who’s tutoring you?” Marlene asked. 

“Don’t know.” 

“What if it’s Snape?” Peter asked, a little fearful.

“Oh that would be perfect.” James hit his head on the table. 

“Oh god, I’m so hungover.” James said, hitting his alarm with his eyes shut. 

“Shut up!” Peter groaned, curling his pillow around his head. 

“Both of you be quiet! I can’t get hard with you both talking.” Sirius yelled from Remus’s bed. 

“Sirius!” It sounded like Remus had punched Sirius as Sirius groaned and then fell through the curtain, holding his nose. 

“Why is your alarm going off anyway?” Sirius asked, standing up and covering his dick with one hand and his other hand still on his nose as he shuffled to the bathroom. 

“Put some clothes on!” Peter groaned, turning so his face was pressed into his mattress and his pillow was over his head. 

“I have tutoring today,” James groaned, putting on his glasses and trying to see how long he had until his tutoring session started. It was ten fifteen and James felt like his brain was pulsating inside his head. 

“Aren’t you going to be late?” Remus called from his bed. 

“No, no. I still have a quarter of an hour before I have to go.” James let his head hit the pillow again. 

“I thought you said your session was at 10?” Remus stuck his head out between the curtains of his bed. 

“No, 10:30. Right?” James started to feel a pit of dread form in his stomach. 

“You said 10.” Peter shook from underneath his blanket. 

“10!” Sirius called from the bathroom. 

“Fuck!” James shot out of bed and pulled on a pair of jeans and a sweater. “Padfoot!” He slammed his fist against the bathroom door, “Get out! I need to brush my teeth!”

At 10:25 James was stumbling into the library and staring around. He was sure that his hair was sticking up every which way as he looked to see where his tutor was. 

He saw you, Sirius’s cousin who the marauders all affectionately called Baby Black, much to your chagrin, sitting at a table in the library, looking over a piece of parchment with a red quill as you twirled a spoon in a cup of tea. 

“Hey! Baby Black,” James said, slamming his hands down on the table where you were, “are you my tutor?”

“You’re late,” you said, “and don’t call me that,” not even looking up from the parchment. You were the same year as the marauders but you had about as much to do with them as you did with the other Black cousins: Regulus, Narcissa, and Bellatrix. You preferred to forge your own path at a school that was seemingly bursting at the seams with your family. Sirius often talked about how you had been the luckiest of all the Black children as your parents, while a little wicked as was Black nature, were the calmest and kindest Blacks aside from any Blacks who had been ex-communicated. Needless to say, even though you were in Slytherin you were nothing like anyone in your family. 

“Sorry, sorry. I have a wicked hangover because I was super drunk last night and-”

“Just sit down,” you cut him off, “I’m finishing up grading a quiz from one of my other students in Defense Against the Dark Arts.”

“Sure, sure. Sorry.” James said, sitting down and taking off his glasses. He had a terrible headache and felt like his eyes were going to pop out of his head. 

“Alright, so potions? What do you need to brew amortentia?” you asked after setting the parchment aside. James took a second to look you. He couldn’t help thinking you were gorgeous: the way your lips were slightly parted as you read, the way you twirled your ring on your finger as you spoke, the brightness in your eyes. He was sure you had a great smile too, but he had yet to see it. 

“Uh, right, love potion. Rose thorns and petals, powdered moonstone, pearl dust, ashwinder eggs, uh chocolate?” James looked at you as your eyes narrowed. 

“Chocolate? God really doesn’t give with both hands, does he?” You shook your head.

“Tulip nectar! Pinecones! Fairy dust?”

“Stop guessing. It’s peppermint. You’re more behind than I thought.” 

“Why are you asking about love potions anyway? Got a crush?” James asked, leaning in and looking up at you seductively. 

“First,” you said, pushing James back with your two pointer fingers, “you have to brew amortentia for your potions exam. Second, you smell like whiskey and vomit.” 

“You love it, Baby Black.”

“I will get Regulus to hex you, Potter.” You said with a light shake of your head. You worked with James for the next hour and a half before assigning him some homework. 

“Thanks for all your help, Baby Black. I’ll see you Tuesday?” James tried to send you another winning smile and you shook your head at him. 

“Monday.” You said, pushing your books into your bag.

“I have quidditch on Monday.”

“What are you going to do when you’re done playing for Gryffindor?” 

“Play professionally,” James shrugged, “Marlene’s brother said he could arrange a meeting with the Canons.”

“So that’s it? You’re going to play quidditch for the rest of your life?” You weren’t sure why you were getting so upset about the situation but you couldn’t stop yourself. 

“What’s wrong with that?” James started to get upset too, raising his voice. “Who doesn’t love quidditch?”

“I don’t.”

“How can’t you? Your cousins Regulus, Narcissa, and Sirius all play or played quidditch. Is the sport of the international wizarding world!”

“It’s beneath you.””

“You don’t even know me. You’re just supposed to be my potions tutor.” James snapped. 

“Fine,” you said cooly, “I’ll see you Tuesday, then.” You practically ran from the library. James shook his head and made his way over to the great hall. He tried to search for you at the Slytherin table before he sat at the Gryffindor table for lunch.

“How was the tutoring session?” Lily asked, stabbing at a piece of lettuce on her plate. 

“Fine. You’ll never guess who it’s with.” James said, looking at Sirius who had been trying to lick Remus’s neck for the past minute. Every time he got close, Remus would snap his fingers up and grab Sirius’ tongue. Sirius’ tongue was currently lodged between Remus’s fingers as Remus read the book that was in his other hand. 

“Who?” Sirius asked, trying to turn but was pulled back by his outstretched tongue, “Let me go!”

“Stop trying to lick me!” Remus said, letting Sirius’ tongue go. 

“Anyway,” Sirius stuck his tongue out at Sirius, “who’s your tutor?”

“Your cousin!” James said with an eyebrow raise. 

“Regulus?” Peter cocked his head.

“Don’t be stupid,” Remus rolled his eyes, “you mean Baby Black don’t you?”

“My cousin is tutoring you? Why didn’t she tell me?” Sirius asked, looking over at the Slytherin table. 

“I have no idea.” James shook his head. 

“Oi! Regulus! Where’s the girl?” Sirius asked, tossing a crumpled piece of parchment at Regulus. Regulus couldn’t have given Sirius a more intense glower before rubbing his nose and saying, 

“Excuse me?”

“Our cousin, Reg. Have you seen her?” Sirius looked at Regulus like he was an idiot. Regulus looked around for a moment and shrugged,

“No idea. I’ll check on her after dinner.” 

“Did you say something to her, James?” Remus asked. Sirius took advantage of this moment of Remus’s distraction to lick him up the neck. 

“Ah ha!” Sirius grinned triumphantly. 

“I’m going to murder you!” Remus said, pulling out his wand. 

“Nevermind,” James rolled his eyes. 

Over the course of the next two weeks, you and James met twice a week for tutoring lessons in the library. One Thursday was just one of those days that was rainy and sleepy and the last day in the week before one of those rare gorgeous three day weekends. It wasn’t a true three day weekend, really, there were no classes on Friday due to a set of makeup exams that were offered to students who wanted to improve their winter exam scores. James was one of these choice students who would hopefully be done once and for all with potions tutoring after the Friday exam. After a full set of classes and an early morning Quidditch practice, all James wanted was to eat dinner and crawl into bed before the weekend ahead of him. Of course, you had chosen today of all days to meet for a final tutoring session before the big potions exam on Friday. 

He was eating dinner when you stopped by the Gryffindor table and sat down next to him.

“What are you doing here?” Sirius asked, shocked by the presence of another Black at the Gryffindor table. 

“I need to talk to James,” you said quickly, “Meet me in the potions classroom in the dungeons for tonight’s lessons.”

“Why the dungeons? What’s wrong with the library?” James asked.

“Slughorn said we could use his classroom so you can fully practice brewing your assigned potions.” You said, getting up from the table, “See you at 8. Don’t be late.” You got up and walked away. James watched you leave the great hall and then sighed, 

“I can’t wait for this to be over.”

“Yeah right,” Remus snorted. 

“What do you mean?” James asked.

“All you’ve talked about these past two weeks is Baby Black.”

“Well yeah. Complaining. She’s annoying.”

“No, not complaining. You can’t stop talking about her. You like her.” Remus grinned. 

“You cannot date my cousin, James.” Sirius said with a hard expression.

“I don’t even like her!” James insisted. Apparently Sirius wasn’t the only Black child that was concerned about you. Regulus stalked over and sat down next to James where you had been only a few moments before. 

“Stay away from my cousin. She’s fragile and sensitive and doesn’t need a rat like you sniffing around her.” He snapped at James. 

“She’s just my tutor! I don’t like her! She barely even tolerates me!” James cried, ignoring Remus’s shit eating grin. 

“I knew it!” Sirius slammed his hand down on the table, “you are trying to fuck my cousin!” 

“Oh my god! I’m leaving!” James stood from the table, looking at the Black brothers. “You two are exactly alike. Why I would ever want to get more involved with this family?” 

“Hey!” Regulus and Sirius said at the same time as Remus cackled. 

“Your cousins are insane,” James said with a head shake as he sat down next to you in the dungeons. 

“You’re telling me.” You muttered. Your hair had been pinned up with your wand stuck through and you pulled your wand out letting your hair fall more freely. You worked with James for the next hour and a half and it seemed like James was going to pass his exam.

“Okay, the last thing I need to do is check on your amortentia, but we can do that tomorrow morning before your exam. Meet back here at eight in the morning.” You replied. You were fanning your neck it had gotten hot in the dungeons after James’ heating potion had gotten a little of hand. You took off your sweater so you were just in a pair of trousers and a thin tank top. James watched a bead of sweat make its way down your neck and into your cleavage.

“Thanks with all your help, Baby Black. You really saved my ass.” He smiled. 

“You worked hard for it, James. No wonder Sirius loves you so much.” You smiled back at him. You had to admit that James wasn’t bad looking at all. He was a bit annoying, the way the Marauders were, but he had a kind heart and easy smile. Before you could fully process what was happening, James was leaning in and kissing you.

“What are you doing?” You asked, pulling away suddenly. 

“I’m sorry! I thought…we were…you aren’t into?” James asked, bewildered. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” You scrambled up and ran out of the dungeon. It wasn’t until you were at the portrait in front of the Slytherin dormitory that you took a minute to stop and let your fingers ghost over your lips. You felt a small smile crawl onto your face and thought about how sad it would be to no longer have an excuse to see James. 

“Where’s Moony?” James asked as he burst into the dormitory. 

“Sucking my dick.” Sirius called from his bed. “Ow! Fuck Moony enough with the teeth!”

“What do you need James?” Remus asked, sticking his head between the curtains. 

“Can you talk? Privately?” 

“Yeah, just a second. I left my notebook by the charms room today. You can walk with me.” Remus got dressed and walked alongside James to the charms classroom.

“So what’s going on, Prongs?” Remus asked. 

“Okay, first, you can’t tell Sirius I told you this.” James started. 

“You’re freaking me out, James.”

“I kissed baby Black.” James blurted out. Remus stopped dead in his tracks and looked at James. 

“You did what?”

“I know! It’s just…she was so nice. And she’s so warm but still sassy and she hates quidditch and doesn’t worship me or anything. And it was hot in the dungeons and she had her sweater off and I don’t know what happened but I kissed her and she ran from the room. Oh god, Moony what did I do?” James was rambling. 

“Okay. Alright. Listen. Did she say she was going to tell anyone?” Remus asked. 

“She didn’t say anything.” 

“You better hope she doesn’t tell Sirius. Or worse, Regulus. You should talk to her.” Remus shook his head. 

“I have to see her tomorrow for her to check my potion before the exam. I’ll talk to her then. Will you come with me?” James felt his stomach flip at the thought.

James felt like his feet were cinderblocks as he made his way to the dungeons with Remus. You were there, in that damn tank top again, looking at the potions. 

“Oh good,” you looked up and gave him a shy smile, “you’re here…with Remus.” Your smile faltered. 

“I’d like to talk about-” James started but you cut him off. 

“Let’s just look at your potion.” Your words were clipped. 

“Alright, Remus why don’t you smell it first and let us know what you think and we can make sure it smells different to everyone.” James said. Remus bent down and took a large sniff of the bubbling liquid in the cauldron. 

“Smells like chocolate, parchment, leather, vinyl. Sirius. Nice job, James.” Remus sat back a little and smiled. “After you Ms. Black.”

“Alright,” you took a large sniff, “Clean cut grass, butter beer, hot Yorkshire pudding.”

Remus was stifling a smile, “And you James?”

“Firewood, a freshly sliced apple, vanilla, and…the Black estate? That smells like you.” James looked up at you confused. 

“I’m going to leave you two alone.” Remus stalked out of the dungeons, sending James a knowing look on his way out. 

“You smelled me in the potion,” James grinned. 

“You must have brewed it wrong.” You shook your head but you couldn’t hide your smile either. 

“You hate quidditch.”

“You’re a stupid jock.”

“You undress me with your eyes every time you see me.”

“You are Sirius’ best friend.”

“You are Sirius’ cousin.”

You grabbed James by the back of the neck and kissed him hard. James’ hands found your waist and started pull at the hem of your tank top. You took the tank top off and laid back on the desk. 

“You’re so beautiful.” James muttered, taking his shirt off too. He sunk down his knees and buried his face between your thighs. His tongue was as long as it was sharp and it darted in and out of your opening. 

“Fuck,” you murmured, your hands in James’ hair as you practically road his face. You came on his tongue before pulling him back up to kiss you. James unbuckled his belt and pushed himself inside you. You started to move your hips but James stopped you.

“Just,” he sounded strained, “I need to adjust for a moment. I’m so close, already, baby.” 

“Oh my god,” you grinned, pulling James closer so his forehead was against yours. James nodded and started to move. He pushed himself in and out of you and you were both moaning, especially when James reached a hand between your bodies to rub your clit. You saw stars as you came with James pulling out and cumming on your stomach soon after. He laid on top of you as you both tried to catch your breath. 

“Potter, what the fuck are you doing?” A new voice said. You and James turned to see Regulus and Sirius standing in the doorway of the potions classroom. 

“Oh Prongs, we’re going to have to kill you.” Sirius shook his head sadly.

“Oh fuck, you’re Sirius’ cousin.” James could only bow his head. 

[everythingisromant1c]

It's Always Been You - Chapter 12

james potter x fem!reader

summary - Things hadn't gotten much better with James, and you knew you could only go so long without talking to him—after all, he was still your best friend. But, considering all that'd happened, along with some encouragement from your friends, you knew the time had come to finally admit you wanted more than that.

wc [6.2k]

a/n: alr guys ... very happy and also sad to say this is the last chapter of it's always been you!! :( i've loved every minute of writing this series as well as sharing it (its become my baby atp), and it is definitely because of all the love and support everyone reading has given it. thank u to everyone stuck around to this point, & i hope u guys enjoy this last chapter!! i send all my hugs and kisses <3 - e

all chapters | <- Chapter 11

It'd been another hour or two until everyone had fully returned from Hogsmeade and dinner was being served in the Great Hall. You finally changed out of your dress and into your everyday clothing again, already feeling better, but that didn't mean you felt good. You didn't think you could feel good when both your brain and heart were hurting like they were. And worst of all, the one person you'd go to in times like these for comfort was the same person you couldn't go to. Not now.

The girls had been doing their best to get your mind off of everything that had happened that day, aside from when Marlene profusely apologized to you for letting Potter hear her outburst in the common room.

"Although, I have to say," she admitted afterward. "I'm not completely sorry for him that he had to hear it. I may be brutal but I never tell a lie."

That fact didn't leave you as you sat with her and Lily in the Great Hall for dinner, a number of seats away from the other Marauders. You recognized with a skip in your heartbeat that James was with them, surprisingly enough since you knew how he was accustomed to skipping meals in the dining hall when he wanted to be alone, a habit you both unfortunately shared. But that didn't mean he was enjoying himself either.

You could see even from your seat down the table that he wasn't saying much, mostly keeping to himself quietly, something so out of character for him yet you'd seen him do it constantly the entire week. You wanted to yell at him and shake him silly, but you also wanted to hug him. When you caught yourself in the midst of those thoughts you turned back to your own spot at the table shamefully.

You tried to force yourself to eat, catching your friends' concerned looks at your full plate, but you didn't feel much like it. Especially not when you still felt maybe a dozen pairs of eyes on you from every corner of the Great Hall.

Even with all that'd happened since just that morning, the rumors and whatever else people had come up with to talk about had not yet been forgotten about by the school like your friends said it would be. Then you thought about whether news had spread of your disastrous date in Hogsmeade, and prayed that nobody had caught wind of that incident either. You didn't think you could handle any more of the staring.

Immediately after you had that thought, you spotted a fifth-year in Ravenclaw robes walking past your table, watching as he blatantly pointed at you as he spoke to his friend, and you looked down at your plate with hardened eyes.

You heard Marlene scoff from next to you. "Hey!" she called to the boy. "Didn't your mother ever tell you it was rude to point?"

The fifth-year didn't respond to her but looked to his friend, hurriedly taking a seat at his own table, his whispers being drowned out in the loudness of the dining hall.

Marlene fumed from next to you. "I can't believe these people. Are they really that bored with their own lives that they're so obsessed with a bloody rumor?"

You shook your head toying with your fork. "Just ignore them. That's what I've settled on doing."

She sighed from beside you and you thought that'd be the end of everything, until you heard gasps from down the table. You looked up and followed the sounds and were met with a sight not even the magic of Hogwarts could've prepared you for.

James—your James—had stood up on the bench he'd once been sitting in, and you thanked Merlin he wasn't standing fully on the table; though you had absolutely no idea what he could possibly be up to, you knew it couldn't be anything good. He cupped a hand to his mouth as your heartrate picked up.

"Can I have everyone's attention?"

He didn't have to ask twice for it. His voice boomed out loudly, something that seemed to come naturally to him, and the noise in the Great Hall had died out in a mere second until it was almost completely silent—quiet enough for you to hear the beating of your heart in your chest as you looked up at him. Your throat went dry.

"Not that it's any of anyone's business," he started confidently to the hundreds of eyes now looking at him, tone nothing but sober. "But nothing happened in the broom closet. Or in the locker room."

You felt the churning in your stomach claw up into your throat, then felt it drop back down, keeping you stationed in your seat. He didn't give much context to his declaration, but with the popularity of the topic amongst the school, it didn't seem like he needed to. His voice almost seemed to echo, all other noises drowning out as everyone stared up at him. James looked around the entire room appearing completely unafraid and you didn't know how the hell he did it; you probably looked more fearful than him.

"So," he began again, "I don't want to see or hear anyone talking about those rumors any longer. And if anyone has a problem with that, they can answer to me. Alright?"

Of course, nobody said anything then, but you could see in their eyes that they were going to listen to him. Or at least, they'd make sure they didn't get caught going against him. Maybe it was from his impenetrably confident voice or his respected status around the school, you weren't sure, but he had that unique effect on people in an almost effortless way.

When it was clear he'd gotten his point across, he scanned his eyes over the sea of students until they found yours. In a dizzying way, it felt like you were the only two in the room for a moment, as cliché as the thought sounded in your head.

You didn't know what had motivated him to do what he did, but you could see in his eyes something fragile that juxtaposed the self-assured look they'd had only seconds ago. He looked away again and stepped back down to floor level once more, not taking a moment before striding out of the Great Hall, his form disappearing seconds after.

Even without his physical presence, his action seemed to linger over the room for a moment more before chatter broke out once again. You were still frozen in place, not knowing if moving would finalize the idea that whatever just happened was real and not just part of some wild dream.

Marlene had confirmed that it definitely had happened, however, when she turned to you with her jaw dropped, an amazed but delighted sparkle in her eye. "Someone tell me you saw that too."

"Oh we saw it," rang Lily, who also looked much too happy about that fact, probably just relieved James's antics weren't centered on her for once. You could see them both staring at you expectantly, waiting for you to react. You could also see the boys in your peripheral, the three of them remaining at the table searching your face for a reaction.

Yet, all you could do was stand up and walk hurriedly towards the exit. Dozens of conversations rushed past your ears as you did, a blur of remarks ranging from "Potter's lost it" to "He's so bloody fit." Whatever they were saying, you noted with gratefulness in the back of your mind that none of the conversations were about you.

You reached the doorway and stopped once you were a safe distance away in the hallway, heaving breaths in for a moment to yourself before finding that you weren't alone. All of your friends had followed you without blinking an eye, and you didn't know whether you found it endearing or inconvenient. Though, to be fair, you didn't know where you were going. You just knew you couldn't sit there and pretend as if nothing had happened.

You blinked at the three boys who neared you with puzzled looks on each of their faces. "Did you guys know anything about this?"

"No," promised Sirius. "In fact, James has hardly said anything to us since this morning."

You shook your head to yourself, feeling breathless. "I can't ... believe he would do that."

"Really?" Lily stared at you. "I mean, it's Potter we're talking about. It's exactly something he would do."

You couldn't fight the smile that tugged on the corners of your lips even as you shook your head. You ran a hand over your hair as the blonde from next to you hit you in the shoulder.

"Well? What are you waiting for?" You frowned over at her as she stared at you expectantly. "Go to him."

You stilled, gaping at her. "What?"

"Go to him. Do I have to spell it out for you?"

You tipped your head at her like it would help you understand her better, parting your drying lips. "I thought you said he was a selfish git." You heard Remus snort from beside you.

"I did, sure," reasoned Marlene, not without a hint of pride. "But only because I thought he was ruining your chances of moving on now that you were over him. But seriously, I can see your face when you look at him." She shook her head. "That's not the look of someone who wants to move on."

Your eyes flickered over her face as she spoke, an infinite number of thoughts overtaking you. In the silence of your thinking, a Hufflepuff boy walked past the six of you in the hallway, staring all the while.

"What are you looking at?" snapped Marlene, turning to him without missing a beat. "Did you not just hear Potter?"

Like he'd heard him loud and clear, and also like he was scared of Marlene, he hurried away with his head bent forward. Satisfied, the blonde turned back to you. At your conflicted expression, she asked, "Well?"

You chewed on the inside of your cheek. "It's just that," you began, not even knowing where you were going with your rambling. "I've spent so long trying to get over him. It's not fair to myself to just forget all of that, and it definitely wasn't fair to Sebastian-"

"For Merlin's sake," cut in Lily, to your surprise. "You keep talking about what's fair and what's unfair, but what about you? What do you want?"

You stared at her, beginning to feel breathless under the eyes of all your friends. "It's not just about what I want. It's not that simple."

"But what if it is?" she questioned. "I know how difficult this has all been for you. And I know you said Potter doesn't just get to realize his feelings for you and suddenly be with you, that it doesn't work like that. But what if it does?" She raised her hands at her sides. "Not everything is a perfect story to tell. Especially not when it comes to you two. It's not every day you fall in love with your best friend and he finally sees that he's fallen for you too. Are you seriously going to let him go because of some made-up system of rules?"

Your breath was becoming staggering now, and you didn't know what to think, because everything they were telling you sounded so right.

"I don't know," you began unsurely. "Of course, I don't want to lose him. Not talking to him for the past week has been harder than I ever could've imagined. I don't even know what it would feel like to have to do it for longer than I already have been." You blinked down at your shoes, truly realizing those things at the same rate you said them. "I think I just ... miss him."

"Of course you miss him." Marlene looked at you sympathetically. "That's why I think you should go tell all this to him."

You felt bile rising in your throat. "I don't even know if he'd want to see me after all we've said to each other."

"Are you joking?" Remus butted in exasperatedly. "Prongs is bloody in love with you. Can't you see that?"

"Remus," you warned softly because you didn't know how much more of this hope you could take before you did something you'd regret.

"I'm telling the truth." His voice was heavy with meaning. "Maybe it took him a while to realize it himself, but the rest of us have had to sit back and watch you both act like you don't have feelings for each other for years. Believe me, the only reason he's in his room right now and not with you is because he thinks that's what you want."

Your brows pinched. "You can't truly know that."

"Really?" he laughed. "What do you think we talked about that night Vance asked you out?"

Your expression faltered and you forced yourself to think back to the night James had begun acting distant from you, though it wasn't difficult to, the storyline of it all clicking into place in your head.

"You," breathed Remus. "We talked about you."

"Not to mention," Sirius added, "we're the ones who've had to spend every night in our dorm listening to him bitch and moan about Vance this and Vance that." You swallowed at your friends' words, but they didn't quit.

"And we know James was being a right idiot today," Sirius insisted honestly. "But you should've seen him this morning right after you two argued. He was heartbroken. More than he'd ever been over Evans." He turned to the redhead in question. "No offense, Evans."

Lily rolled her eyes lightheartedly. "Trust me, Black, none taken."

He nodded and turned back to you swiftly. "So for you to think that James would want anything other than to fix things with you and just be with you is bloody mental."

You stared at all of your friends who were looking so determinedly back at you that you didn't think you could tell them 'no' now. But still, your feet didn't budge.

"It's not just that," you almost whispered. "I guess I'm just ... scared. What if it goes wrong and we get into some ridiculous fight again? What then?"

Marlene took a hold of your shoulders, slightly scaring you in her resoluteness. "Potter just stood up and yelled at the entire bloody school and you're trying to tell us you'rescared?" She shook you a little, and your friends smirked from behind her. "Be a Gryffindor for Godric's sake! Go to him!"

Before you could say anything more, she was turning you around and shoving you a little until you had the momentum you needed to take steps toward the Gryffindor common room. You made it all the way up the nearest set of steps before you paused, turning back to your friends with a grateful smile.

"Thank you, you guys." You expected them to share the sweet moment with you, but they only rolled their eyes.

"Go, woman!" Sirius groaned, and you rolled your eyes back at them, but it lacked any real annoyance.

You didn't know exactly what you were planning on doing, but you didn't have time to think about it because your legs were carrying you speedily through the halls in your anxious state and wouldn't let you stop until you reached the portrait entrance to the Gryffindor common room. Taking a steadying breath in, you said the password and entered the room.

With everyone else still being at dinner in the Great Hall, it wasn't exactly difficult to find James. He sat in the common room, his brunette head of curls visible to you in the low light. They covered the majority of his face that you could see, his head tipped downwards with his elbows resting on his knees. That changed within the blink of an eye as you entered the room, his head swiftly lifting until he locked eyes with you, and you had to fight a shiver at the feeling it sent shuddering through you.

He seemed to think you were just going to go to your own dorm and ignore him, and he averted his eyes to look somewhere else, maybe the fireplace, until you left—but you didn't. You only walked closer to him until you were separated by only one of the couches, the distance still small enough to make your breathing quicken.

At the soundlessness of your stilled footsteps, James looked back up and met your eyes again, and he swallowed. Clearly, he hadn't expected you to make any move to talk to him that night, even after the scene he'd made in the Great Hall. The problem was that you hadn't expected yourself to either, and now you didn't know what you wanted to say first, because there were certainly a million things you had to make sure he knew.

"Thank you," you said, because you figured it was a good place to start. He nodded up at you, his eyes not revealing much of anything, but you didn't let that sway you. "You didn't have to do that, you know."

"Of course I did." His voice was stubborn, but too sincere for how little his expression gave away.

You looked down at your feet, letting a moment pass before speaking again. "Well, now it seems like everyone is going to be talking about you from now on."

"That doesn't matter to me." James's voice cut through the air richly, and when you looked back up from the floor he was staring at you meaningfully. "They can say whatever the hell they want. As long as they're not talking about you."

Your shoulders dropped at his words, and the way he held your eyes as he said them made your heart beat faster in your chest. It hadn't even been a full day since you'd last spoken to him, but you already missed him.

"They wouldn't leave you alone," he said concretely, his tone beginning to fill with emotion. "And then, I heard what Marlene said in the common room, about some girl harassing you in the library? I-" he shook his head frustratedly, rubbing at his forehead with one of his hands. "I'm just mad at myself that I've let it go on for this long. Or that I didn't even know that happened."

You already felt too emotional for your liking, the feelings inside of you swirling more aggressively at every word he said to you. "It's not like it's your fault, James."

"Well it's not like I did much to stop it, did I?" He seemed genuinely angry at himself now, and you didn't know what you could do to help. A painful lump was rising in your throat, but you stayed rooted in your spot behind the sofa. "And I'd ask you why you didn't come and tell me, but that'd be a bloody stupid question."

He shook his head, eyes becoming wistful like he was recalling a memory, one that pained him. "Earlier, when Marlene was defending you in the common room, the look on your face was ... I don't know. Crushed. Sad."

You swallowed at the memory, because that had been exactly how you were feeling, amongst thousands of other ways. James looked down at his lap.

"I just wanted to try and help, do anything to make that look on your face go away, but I couldn't. So I just kept replaying how you looked in my head, and the more I thought about it, the more I hated myself because I realized you were only hurting because of me. And that was the worst part. Realizing that it was all my fault."

You felt yourself wanting to take a step towards him, wanting to just reach out to him as the tips of your fingers teemed with the longing you felt in your chest. "James," you began, your voice hushed. "It's not all your fault."

You meant it. To try and say to yourself that you had no part in all the confusion between the two of you would be a blatant lie, one that you couldn't let James go on believing, especially not with the pained look on his face.

He only shook his head at you. "It is," he insisted. "And here you go, being perfect towards me when I don't deserve it." A muscle worked overtime in his jaw. "Marlene was right. I was being selfish, and petty, and a lot of other things, but most importantly, I wasn't being a good friend." He paused, a grieving confliction tugging at his brow. "That's ... that's not what friends do."

You went still then too, the word 'friend' hanging in the air between you with a weight that only made you tired. The truth was that cobwebs had grown in the house where you'd fostered that unforgiving title, and it felt like some intangible force had locked you both inside with it blindly.

"Yeah, well," you began, your voice small, "we've been doing plenty of things that friends don't do, lately.Like you said, we kissed, right?" You let out a breathy sound like a laugh that lacked any joy, and the way James's eyes flickered up at you knocked the rest of the air right out of you.

"About that," he began hesitantly, and you could tell he was thinking about both the night it'd happened and that morning when you'd fought, just like you were. "I know you don't want that to mean anything, so it- ... it doesn't have to. Even if I want it to. Because it doesn't matter what I want—what matters to me is you."

You were thankful you had the couch next to you to brace a hand on, because you'd never felt so swept up by a conversation and you weren't sure how much longer you could stand the way your heart was nagging at you.

"You were right," swore James, but the slight shake of his eyes back and forth on your face didn't look as adamant as he sounded. "It's not fair for me to expect something from you when you already got over me."

The words you'd shouted at him in Hogsmeade that morning sounded foreign and wrong coming from his lips, and you knew the months of dishonesty that laced them like you knew the back of your hand.

"And it's too late now, I get that." His voice went from deep and determined to on the cusp of breaking, and it killed you. "I just want to know that you're happy, and if being happy means being with Vance instead of me, then ... I can deal with that."

You watched as he swallowed, like he was forcing the words to come from his lips even if it pained him. The way he hadn't broken eye contact with you the whole while was starting to make your head spin.

Your blinking sped up, maybe holding back the emotion you knew you was fighting to come out, and you whispered, "James."

Maybe you hadn't been loud enough, or maybe he just knew you'd try to disagree with him again, but he only continued determinedly at you.

"I know I probably went and ruined your chances with Vance, like an idiot, but I'm going to do whatever it takes to get you another date with him." He nodded at you once firmly, and within a second he was standing up, taking an intentional step forward. "Hell, I'll even go talk to him right now and-"

"James," you called again, louder this time. "Stop."

You put a hand out and it landed on his arm softly but firmly, and all you could was pray you could find the right words to say to him as he stared at you, level with you now in an unsteadying way.

"You didn't ruin my chances with Sebastian. It wouldn't have worked out regardless, even if I'd wanted it to. Because being with him isn't what I want." You shook your head, recalling back what James had said to you only moments before. "He wouldn't have made me happy." You sounded desperate now. "He's not you."

James stilled, his glistening eyes the only thing showing movement as they danced across your face intensely, though you saw them widen with something bright like hope. "What?"

The confusion of the word that he'd practically whispered out unspeakably attested to how you felt yourself, the terrain of the land you were exploring right there and then with James uncharted and rocky. You pushed on, knowing there was no going back now.

"Marlene wasn't completely right, James. She only said all of those things because I'd spent all this time trying to convince her—and myself—that I didn't still have feelings for you. But I do, clearly." You tipped your head down for a moment in exasperation and exhaustion, willing yourself to keep going. "Everyone can see it. All of our friends. Hell, even Sebastian could see it." You laughed, though your eyes were growing blurry. "So for me to try to push those feelings down any longer would just be lying to you and to myself." You let out an exasperated breath. "And I'm so sick of lying."

Your shoulders sunk as you stood there, a steadily shrinking distance between you and James that was both comforting and daunting to you. You couldn't do anything but watch as James's face stilled and then shifted as he thought, studying your own face in a way that made you conscious of every shift in your expression.

"I just," he began, and then raked a hand through his hair. "Why did you feel like you needed to hide how you felt in the first place?"

You felt your mouth go dry at the question—one you knew came only out of a desperate curiosity and nothing else—and your mind began spinning. The last few years of your friendship seemed to swirl in your head, flickering in and out of focus as you tried to come up with an answer.

"I-" you began, willing yourself to say something, anything at all. "I was scared." The words rang true so much that they made your heart pinch. "Scared that you wouldn't feel the same and I'd go and ruin everything. That I'd lose you."

James's hands lifted up from his sides like he wanted to reach out to you, and he did. He took your hand in his, grasping lightly at your fingertips in a touch that steadied you and made you feel lightheaded at the same time. He shook his head at you with a firm hold in his brow.

"You could never lose me."

His lips were parted, and his hazel eyes glistened over in the low common room lighting like the thought of your suggestion was painful enough on its own. Looking at him then, his face lined with years of a comforting, steadying familiarity, you knew deep in your chest that what he said was true. But that didn't alter all that you'd felt for the past number of years.

"It's not just that," you said, looking down at his hand that held yours and blinking away the guilt that crept into your stomach, because it wasn't James's fault that you had felt this way. "Even in Hogsmeade, James." Your voice was becoming unsteady again and it only frustrated you more. "What if everything you said you felt for me was just some spur-of-the-moment thing from some kiss? What if you didn't feel the same way a week from now? Or a month? I knew I wouldn't be able to get over that fear. Especially when I'd been hiding how I felt from you for years. And then there were your feelings for Lily to think about and ... I don't know."

You trailed off, finally able to stop yourself. You felt petty, so petty, because you were so close to getting what you knew your heart wanted, but you felt the insistent need to ruin things for yourself and think of every way things could go wrong. You'd never felt closer to James then, but also never farther away. All you could do was stand there and wait for him to say something, anything.

James stayed unmoving for a beat staring at you, wordlessly taking everything in with a fragility in the air that hallowed your labored breathing. Then he started to shake his head like he was in disbelief. He ran a hand through his brown hair.

"For Merlin's sake."

His voice was low, a mutter, and he stared at the ground for a moment in thought before dropping the hand that once held yours, turning and walking away from you, leaving up the steps to his dorm room. You watched his back as he disappeared, your fingertips feeling cold and empty.

You felt your blinking speed up in a dizzying confusion. You didn't know what had come over you, not even sure exactly what you'd said in all of your desperate rambling that had made him decide to leave, but your vision started to blur even more than it already had until you recognized the wetness forming beside your eyes.

Nothing made sense. Not then, and not in the last twenty-four hours. You moved until you were sitting down on the couch in front of you, feeling lightheaded as the fireplace crackled a few feet away. The light from outside had left with the sun and the room had a comforting kind of warm lighting, though even that did little to soothe you as you sat there with all the unresolved feelings within you.

You were confused and lost and wanted nothing more than to just fix things, but you were even more at a loss for words when you heard quick footsteps coming from the staircase James had left from, and then saw his returning form making its way down the steps.

You turned your head to him swiftly in confusion, following him and his soft but energetic steps as he came to sit next to you, and that was when you noticed he was holding something—a box. One that was tattered on the corners, its black fabric aged and dusting over.

You wiped at your eyes quickly, brows tugging in all your bewilderment as you waited for James to explain.

"I-" he began, and stopped as soon as his eyes focused more on your face. You must've looked as broken as you felt, and at seeing the look on your face, he held one of your hands in his before swiping across your cheek gently with the pad of his thumb.

You felt like wilting under his soft touch that you'd missed more than anything in the confusing weeks, mentally and physically exhausted from everything but still wanting more than anything to understand.

When you looked perhaps more stable, he looked back at the box that he'd set down beside him and placed it on his lap delicately as he spoke, his words echoing out slowly.

"I know you think I've just realized my feelings for you a week ago, and that they came from some kiss at a party. But, you have to believe me when I say that they're so much more than that." He placed the box in your hands, and you took it from him with a note of fragility, resting it atop your legs. His eyes bore into yours, like it would break him if you couldn't understand the words leaving his lips. He took a shaky breath in. "I need you to know, more than anything, that you're everything to me. You always have been."

Your lips began to shake at the earth-shattering words coming from your best friend's lips. "James, what-"

He stopped you with a gesture of his head that told you to look inside the box, and you did. Carefully, you lifted the flimsy cardboard top and placed it to the side, brows pulling together tight and something loud and hearty threatening to pull from your chest. You shook your head as tears began to well over your eyes again as you recognized what James had given you.

The box, the measly and old mess of cardboard and paper, was full of all the letters you'd written to him over the years—all the thank you notes, the letters you'd sent him from that summer and all the past ones—every single one of them. Your eyes raked over each of them when you felt too stunned to use your hands, but your heart still felt touched by the memories of each one all the same. It took everything in you not to release the sob you felt rising in your lungs.

"It's you. It's always been you."

James's eyes never left your face as you took everything in, the look behind them never having seemed so determined, so desperate. But there was something behind the way he looked at you, something so warm and honest, so familiar that you felt ridiculous for never noticing it before. And when your gaze flickered downward for a second in contemplation he tipped his head to follow it endearingly.

"Always," he promised. "Not Evans, not anyone else. I know I'm a bloody idiot, and I know I haven't been great at showing my emotions when it comes to you, but that's because it's you, and you mean everything to me and have since we were kids, and if this can't make you see that then I promise I'll spend every day trying to make up for it, and-"

"James." You stopped him, not knowing how much longer you could take sitting next to him and not getting rid of the frustrated crease between his brows, or how much longer you could ignore the thrum of your heart that called out to him so clearly now.

"Yeah?" he asked, and his eyes were like a deer in headlights. The warmth in their color reflected the simmering warmth from the fireplace, but that didn't compare to the fire that lay behind his gaze.

You placed the box, his box of the last six years of your friendship and then some, atop the couch next to you, and didn't wait another second before engulfing him in a hug. Your body crashed into his as he leaned back against the couch, his hands coming up to embrace you right away, and you heard him breathe a smile by your ear before he laughed, a perfect noise.

You felt like laughing then too, and crying, and everything else, because you couldn't remember the last time you'd gotten to hold him like this without the fear of revealing too much to him nagging at you. Your cheek pressed against his neck, his curls fanned against the top of your head, his hands held you tight, and you never wanted to leave the safety of his arms. Except to do one thing.

You pulled away from the hug and so did James after a second, his eyes wide and glistening but truly happy. He was smiling widely, his lopsided grin appearing after days like the sun after a storm, and you loved the sight more than anything, locking it away in the back of your mind as a memory you'd keep forever, like the box that sat next to you.

You laid a hand on his chest, another on his cheek, and James grasped the one that was flattened on his chest in his own, quickly glancing down at your hand in his like he couldn't believe he was holding it. He pulled you into him with it and leaned his head on yours.

"It's always been you, too," you whispered, and his eyes glanced down at your lips as you said the quiet words that'd been lingering on your lips for much too long. You had to push away your smile because you were aching to just kiss him like you'd wanted to for years. With a courage that could've only come from Godric himself, you finally did.

You leaned in until your lips met, a flutter of skin dancing shyly together until you leaned into him even further, and suddenly it felt like the crash of a wave, and sounded like the earth was moving beneath your feet, the sound of something right—and this time, you knew it felt the same for him too, because you could feel his boyish grin that you'd spent years admiring tugging against your lips.

You were kissing your best friend. For real this time. It felt so impossible for your mind to imagine such a thing, but luckily it didn't have to.

James moved his hands but they never left you, one sliding through your hair smoothly and one delicately holding your waist like you were something fragile. Butterflies fluttered through you at his touch, something familiar but foreign, wrong but also right, and somessilyperfect. You couldn't believe you'd spent all those years just a few words away from getting to feel it, getting to be surrounded by it.

You pulled away after a moment, your lips feeling puffy and burning with the heat of his kiss, but all you could think about was how free you felt, how happy you were that he was finally yours.

James looked down at you, his eyes dancing all across your face and stopping on your lips, and then somehow growing even warmer when they met yours again.

"I can't-" he began with a slight disbelieving shake of his head, voice coming out breathless and dazed as heat flushed into your own cheeks at the sight. "I can't believe..."

You laughed, feeling out of breath too, and adjusted the glasses that now perched crookedly on James's nose in an agonizingly cute way.

"Me neither," you finished for him, because you knew just how he felt, a secret the both of you shared; it was the only secret you still wanted to keep.

And it was a feeling you never wanted to have to live without again. Though now, with him in your arms and his familiar chocolate curls still brushing against your forehead, you knew you would never have to.

taglist!!

@hisparentsgallerryy @msmk11 @garfieldsladybird @empath-bunny @urmykindofwoman @bambi-jp @babyclea @kenjikishimotoswifey @cloudroomblog @the-marauders-mapp @mooonyxoxo @imgondeletedis @moon-flowerrs @fruticake @arey0usirius @marauroon @swiftsgirlfriend @jamieolivia27 @magicwithaknife

[thatboisus]

the fan cast for the young marauders is without a doubt one of the best fan cast i have ever seen it’s so perfect and flawless whoever is responsible seriously needs a kiss on the forehead

[veryberryjelly]

🍸 prompt 5 or 6 with james potter maybe?

james potter x reader

prompts ; ' wait don't go, please' + " is this okay ?" " its more than okay "

𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 ✦ 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 !

afternoons spent lounging on james' bed under his cover with delicate and soft kisses being exchanged for hours were your favourite way to spend your weekends.

sometimes you two could go hours without anything being said, just basking in the warmth of each others company.

only today it had been spent slipping in and out of light sleep due to a party going very late last night in the common room.

you had only been awake a few moments when james roused beside you, his head moving to bury in the crook of your neck which only brought a smile to your lips

" morning sleepy head " you said softly, turning slightly to wrap your arms around the boy.

" time is it ? " he questioned, his voice groggy and his eyes struggling to open as he looked up at you.

" quarter to two " you replied, one of your hands lifting to thread through his curls.

" you think we should get up any time soon ?"

" in your dreams am i letting you up "

his words caused a soft laugh to bubble past your lips. you tilted your head to press a kiss onto the top of his head, your arms wrapping slightly tighter around him before you settled.

you were on the verge of falling into another light sleep when you heard the door to james' dorm open and both of your eyes flitted to the door and were greeted with the familiar sight of remus and sirius.

" - could just live above the shop, moony. it might be the only way i'll never be- oh, hello there, didnt mean to interrupt lovebirds "

you were unsure what the beginning of that conversation was but that didnt matter too much. remus and sirius headed to the bed across the room, both sitting on the edge looking over at yourself and james.

your instinct kicked in and you sat up, pulling a sweater over your head.

" you didn't interrupt, i was about to head back to my dorm, i need to shower "

you weren't shy about pda, but you whenever someone walked in on you and james in his bed, you felt out of place. this was their dorm and you felt like you were imposing.

as you moved to slide out of bed james' strong arms wrapped around your torso, halting your effort to get up.

" wait, don't go, please, you can shower here " james pleaded, his tired eyes gleaming up at you in a way that made it almost impossible to say no to him

you lowered your hand down and brushed some curls from your lovers face.

" i'll see you later, jamie, i promise " the hurt on his face might be subtle to anyone else but to you it was practically painted across his face in big black letters.

" i hate it when you have to go back to your dorm- " he admitted, his gaze dropping down to the mattress, his sadness obviously presented in the way he fiddled with the sheets between his fingers.

" i know, but all of my stuff is there, i live there, baby "

" move your stuff here " he blurted out causing disbelief to appear on your face and your sure on the faces of james friends. " i hate it when you leave, baby. i want to sleep with you every night and wake up to you every morning...come stay here " his voice sounded almost desperate and you wanted to melt at his sincerity.

" jamie, you're asking me to move in here when you live with three other people..." you loved waking up with james, the sight of his bed head along was enough to want to sleep with him every night. but he lived with three other people, including another couple.

james finally sat up in the bed and focused his eyes on you. " darling, is that something you would want, yes or no "

" yes, theoretica-"

" is that okay ?" he brought his gaze over to the two boys on the opposite side of the room.

there was a few moments of silence where glances were exchanged between the two boys, but the grins on their faces gave you your answer before they spoke up.

" it's more than okay. we can help you move your stuff tomorrow if you want "

you could feel the joy beaming off of james beside you before you even turned to look at him, but when you did he had a shit eating grin on his face, his bottom lip caught between his teeth waiting for your answer.

" ok, yes, i'll move in "

the minute your answer fell from your lips you were tackled by the boy into one of the most passionate hugs he had ever given you. it wasnt long before remus and sirius jumped in too, their arms wrapping around the two of you.

" welcome to the dorm...don't wake us up in the middle of the night with sex noises "

[maybe-moonchild]

CH 2 𓆣 James Potter x Slytherin Reader summary: you could have worse company... you could also have less annoying company... WC: 4.5k ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Sixth year ended uneventfully. 

You had a few more run-ins with Kaston, most involving insults, the occasional tripping or knock of your books out of your hand. The typical pure-blood ideology bullshit was sent Lance’s way too when he was around. Keith only hexed him once. 

Classes went well enough after final examinations were completed and you received report of your grades. Packing  up your dorm for the summer resembled shoving things into your bags the day before boarding the Hogwarts Express. That was it. Your sixth year was done and you had three whole months spending time with your family, enjoying the weather and exchanging letters with your friends until you got to see them. 

Most importantly, you had three months of no magic. 

You almost felt guilty how relieved you felt not being around wizards each day. You didn’t feel like you were behind, always playing catch up on their way of life. 

Your new found peace ended with your Hogwarts letter calling for you to return at the end of August. Your parents seemed almost disappointed when you told them you wanted to go school shopping alone, your heart broke at the way their excitement fell, plastering on a smile and chalking it up to you just wanting to be mature. 

You let them think that. It seemed a lot easier to let them believe instead of the fact that returning to Diagon Alley with your muggle loved ones seemed like they would just be in danger. So they agreed, making sure you planned your trip with Lance and Keith so you wouldn’t be on your own. 

Flourish and Blotts was relatively busy, the once lazy feeling in the air associated with summer turning to an excited hum for the upcoming school year. You were still waiting on the arrival of your friends as you stood between the shelves. You hadn’t been able to refrain yourself from grabbing the most recent edition of The Daily Prophet and flipping through its pages.

Sometimes you wondered if the war was truly ever going to end.

It seemed as if you’d missed a summer of awful news; more disappearances of muggles and muggle borns, their families found killed in their homes. Hogwarts and magic had once been exciting, filling the gaps in your life with wonder the more you saw and learned. Along the years of whispered threats and hissed insults at your back, you felt like you’d been chased away from your prior love of the Wizarding World. 

You were too enthralled in reading to notice a group of boys chasing each other into the store. 

Sirius accused Peter of stealing his recently purchased sugar quill as they stomped through the store. James was too busy reading through the list of things he and Sirius were supposed to purchase today to keep Euphemia Potter from being cross. Remus hid his smirk behind the stick of the sugar quill hanging from his mouth. 

When James glanced up from his list, the sight of you between the shelves they had just passed made him do a double take. For some reason, he just stopped in his tracks. He was staring, he knew that he was but he couldn’t bring himself to stop. You looked more or less the same aside from having gotten some sun and your hair gaining a little length. 

It wasn’t like he was watching you in a weird way… just… watching. 

“You going to go over there or just keep staring,” Sirius whispered in his ear before blowing into it. James jumped slightly as Sirius whispered in his ear, a scowl instantly forming on his face as he playfully smacked the back of his head. 

Laughing at his own antics, Sirius leaned back, raising an eyebrow in question as he settled against one of the shelves. 

“You’ve never been the quiet type before,” Remus murmured as he read the back of a book, “Even with Lily, you’d be tripping over your own feet to talk to her.”

"What are you-" James began, but the words got caught in his throat as he glanced up and spotted you once again. “This is- This is nothing like with Evans! I was just looking!”

Sirius snorted, “More like drooling.”

James’s mouth dropped uncontrollably, snapping shut in the hope that he could look unbothered. 

"I was certainly not," he muttered under his breath, his confidence sounding more like false bravado.

“Want me to wipe your chin, Prongs?”

“Want me to smack you right in the store?”

Thank Merlin you were both far enough away and too engrossed in The Daily Profit to even look up. 

Remus continued browsing the spines of books. “And yet, you are stalling,” he teased, not even bothering to glance up.

James was instantly on the defensive, his eyes narrowing as he shot Remus a dirty look. "Just because I'm not rushing over there doesn't mean anything," James muttered. His eyes returned to the piece of paper in his hands. 

“Why don’t you go talk to her then?” Sirius smiled smugly, barely able to contain how humorous he found the sight. “Instead of standing here like an idiot.”

"Oh, he’s got it bad,” Remus hummed with feigned sympathy. . 

“Is this how you usually land girls then?” Peter, a better actor than all of them, cocked his head to the side, “by staring at them from across a store?”

Sirius was nearly doubled over as he tried to stifle his laughter to keep himself quiet. Leaning forward to rest his forehead against the wood, Remus clapped a hand on Peter's shoulder, the both of them chuckling. 

“You know, you’re a real git, you know that, right?” James hissed, his voice sounding more frustrated than menacing. He turned to glare around at the other Marauders, who seemed to be taking great pleasure in witnessing his predicament.

Scoffing, his face turned even redder, shoving the list back into his pocket. "I'll have you know I am a certified charmer." He tried to say this with confidence, but even Peter's words had chipped away at his normally impenetrable ego. 

Sirius just laughed harder behind his hand.

"I was simply... trying to decide on the best way to approach her.” James was trying to maintain some semblance of his usual charm.

"You're not even approaching her," Remus pointed out dryly, his lips twitching with a barely suppressed smile.

The other three boys shared a look, one that had Peter and Remus slipping away while Sirius hung an arm around James’s shoulder. 

“Listen mate, you’re getting too into your own head. Sure, she may not necessarily be the biggest fan of you and your ego, but she doesn’t hate you- in fact! Once in a while you make her laugh at your own expense.” Both of them moved in your direction, James finding himself nodding.

“So, remember you’re a gryffindor, quite being a big baby, and talk to her.”  As Sirius finished giving his advice, he was all too ecstatic to give him a shove.

James stumbled forward, catching himself just in time to avoid falling directly into you. He could hear the sound of Sirius' laughter in the distance, but he ignored it as he found himself face-to-face with you when you had startled. 

Both of your eyes were wide for different reasons, yours in surprise and his in… well also surprise but because he really hadn’t planned on having to catch himself on a shelf at the last second. At least he had crushed you. 

You visibly relaxed at the realization that it wasn’t a threat, just an idiot. 

One that you didn’t hate horribly. 

“Hi James,” you drew out skeptically, amused nonetheless. 

His strange behavior fell away to reveal his usual charismatic appeal as he gave you a roguish smile. James adjusted his arm gripping the bookshelf where it caught his fall to lean against it with his forearm. You were sure you had seen him like this many times before. 

Usually it involved the Hogwarts library, Lilly Evans and an attempt at flirting. 

“Hi.” As if he remembered that himself, he stood up straighter and cleared his throat. “Fancy seeing you here.”

You frowned in thought, “Is it? I didn’t think it was all that unexpected given most students do their shopping on the weekend.” 

You were unaware that James was half listening to what you were saying, and half shooting a dirty look to the other Marauders when they peaked out from behind a bookshelf. You didn’t see it, too busy trying to make sense of James, something you gave up on long ago. 

“Have a good holiday then?” James asked abruptly, grinning as he turned his attention back to you. 

“I’d say so, spent time at home, a little bit of traveling with my family, relaxing,” you shrugged, “Nothing special. What about you? Heard Black moved in with you. Your poor mother.”

James let out a snort of laughter, a warm smile spreading across his face. You didn’t hesitate to feel as lively as he looked. 

"Yeah, she was not thrilled that we accidentally crashed our brooms into her garden multiple times, but she loves us both nonetheless," he said with a chuckle, shaking his head. Even though the conversation about the situation was lighthearted, you knew that Sirius leaving the house of Black was no small event. 

"As if I wasn't bad enough, they now get two of us.” He shrugged, his hands slipping into his pockets as he leaned back casually against the bookshelf. The sight of the other Marauders watching them from a distance was not lost on him, but he chose to ignore it for the moment. “So eh, yeah. I guess it was a good summer, It was great having Sirius there with me. He could always crack a joke that would make even a dementor laugh.”

“That’s good, I’m glad to hear it.”

A group of Ravenclaw girls slipped by, greeting you both before erupting into a fit of giggles once they’d passed. You were at least grateful to know that you weren’t the object of their laughter. The thing about being in James Potter’s presence was that he always outshined you. That was fine by you as long as it kept any negative attention from hanging over your head. 

Clearly they were giggling about having successfully said hello to him.

“You finish your shopping then?” 

A movement behind him caught your attention as you opened your mouth, “No, just started actually. Waiting to meet with Lance and Keith at The Leaky Cauldron in twenty minutes.”

"I think I have a couple left as well," he said a little too enthusiastically, clearing his throat with a nonchalant wave of his hand. "Why don't we, you know, shop together?"

You raised an eyebrow at the offer. Sure, maybe James had been a witness to your moment of weakness last year, but it wasn’t like the two of you had even exchanged letters this summer. But he looked so earnest about the offer, you felt like saying no would make him look like a kid who just watched you kick a puppy. 

So you smiled, albeit a bit unsurely, you smiled nonetheless. 

“Uh, sure.”

He instantly brightened, bright enough to hurt your eyes like you had stared directly into the sun. Luckily, you looked away quickly as you peaked behind him. 

“Will uh, your friends be joining us too?”

James whipped around to see Sirius, Peter, and even Remus sticking their heads out from behind a shelf. The sight was comical, looking straight out of a cartoon; even more so when they realized they’d been caught and jumped out of sight. 

You found it amusing to watch how he nearly cringed. “I suppose they will be,” he sighed. 

The five of you didn’t spend too much longer there, easily picking up the books you’d need for seventh year. You were pleasantly surprised to chat with Remus about books you had read over the summer, learning that he also enjoyed muggle literature. It made you more aware of how little you actually knew about The Marauders, aside from what was surface level. That was okay but you hadn’t expected to enjoy learning more. 

Given that you still had some time before heading to The Leaky Cauldron, you didn’t mind stopping at another store or two to pass the time.

Up until Sirius mentioned stopping at Quality Quidditch Supplies. James was ecstatic at the idea, quickly involving you in the plan given the three of you were the quidditch players of the group. The two boys were too engrossed in their conversation about what broom polish they preferred to notice your sudden discomfort. 

Sirius let out a loud exaggerated scoff, rolling his eyes as he turned to face you and James. "I could still outfly the two of you any day," he teased. “Come on, we’ll meet Remus and Peter at The Leaky Cauldron when we’re done.”

You opened your mouth, the words sticking apprehensively to the tip of your tongue. You urged yourself to say something, to even just feign disinterest and opt to head to Rosa Lee Teabag, just lie and say you really loved tea. 

Instead, your mouth closed and your shoulders sagged in defeat as you followed behind Sirius and James. 

You were quite familiar with Quality Quidditch Supplies, having frequented the store before each return to Hogwarts. The smell of boom polish was overwhelming when you opened the door, feeling like a sense of home. You couldn’t help but inhale deeply as the three of you stepped inside. 

You half-listened to James excitedly discuss the new broom he’d gotten over the summer. There was no doubt it was the newest model, his parent’s religiously sending him off to Hogwarts with the best model available given he was a star player. 

Normally, you would’ve been rolling your eyes; snorting out a sarcastic comment asking if that broom would be able to lift his massive head off the ground. You were just uncharacteristically quiet on the topic and it didn’t take long for it to be noticed. 

James glanced behind him, looking for evidence that something was wrong. Your mouth was twisted into a little frown, teeth worrying at your bottom lip as your fingers trailed along the broom handles in the displays. 

He wanted you to say something, anything. He couldn’t understand why you were so uncharacteristically quiet. Wasn't this your favorite subject? Quidditch had always been something you loved.

As Sirius announced that he would be going to look at new goggles, James hung behind when you stopped in front of a shelf. He reached over your head to pluck a jar of broom polish sitting over your head and pretended to be very interested in reading the label. 

“You alright then?” James asked, glancing over at you in hopes that he sounded flippant on the topic. 

You pretended not to hear him for a moment, humming in confusion so you could assess how closely he was watching you. 

“Oh. Yeah.” You shrugged, mirroring his attempt at looking casual by picking up a bottle of broom polish and inspecting it between your fingers. Neither of you were doing a good job considering the air seemed to feel thicker in the face of the awkwardness. 

You should just say it. 

Afterall, he’d been witness to your tears at the end of last school year following your humiliation at the hands of Elias Kaston. 

“I uh… quit… quidditch.”

From how big James’s eyes got and how quickly he whipped to look in your direction, you might’ve been speaking another language. You didn’t look up at him even though you could see how he was staring at you in complete shock. 

James couldn’t have heard you correctly, because there was no way that you just said what he thought you did.

"You... you quit?" His voice was obnoxiously loud. “You quit? Why? Why on earth would you quit quidditch?”

A few shoppers nearby turned in your direction, concerned at the sound. You turned to look at him and raised a hand, hoping to placate James and his knack for dramatics. “Okay, okay,” you hissed, “Keep it down, would you? It's not that big of a deal.”

If Sirius would have been in the vicinity, half of Diagon Alley would have known by now.

“Not that big of a deal? Really?”

“Which it’s not.”

“You’ve been playing since second year.”

“Yes, James. I am quite aware of that.”

“You were captain last year- you won the final match last year!”

You shrugged, the action far too tense to be as dismissive as you tried to be. “I just wasn’t feeling it this year, I don’t know.”

No one would believe that excuse, especially when you turned away, picking up a different bottle of broom polish. It gave you an excuse to avoid his scrutinizing eyes that made you practically itch as you tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. 

James’s lips pressed into a thin line, inhaling slowly through his nose and saying nothing. You didn’t need to. 

He stepped closer, speaking passionately in a much lower volume. “You’re a better player than Kaston.”

“It’s not because of Kaston,” you scoffed. James continued, speaking over your protests and speaking louder as your lies continued.

“You’re a better leader.”

“Doesn’t matter, it has nothing to do with that.”

“You had the potential to lead your team to another cup this year.”

“Well, I already won, wanted to give you a fair chance,” you shot back, feigning disinterest. His hand shot forward to pull your distraction away from you, holding it out of reach when you attempted to snatch it back. You had to look at him then, see the disappointment in his furrowed brows and parted mouth. 

“Are you really going to give that all up for an asshole like him?”

“I’m not doing it because of him!” It came out sharper than you had intended and you were immediately embarrassed; less so about the outburst itself and more because you felt stupid even bothering to deny it. James had been the one to see the effect your year as captain had on you last year when he found you in the kitchen, how defeated you were when you should have been celebrating. 

Being the captain of the Slytherin team last year had been a disaster and you couldn’t imagine doing it again. But the thought of remaining on the team while Kaston took your spot of power-

Who were you kidding? You wouldn’t have made it through the first round of tryouts.

You bit back something sharp that wanted to fall from your lips and impale him, just so you would maybe feel better. That would’ve been wrong; James was clearly still trying to help. So you forced yourself to look away and chewed on your bottom lip to give yourself a moment to take a breath.

 “I already told you last year,” you sighed, leaning back against the shelf and staring at your feet. “No one listened to me. There were times no one besides Keith showed up at practice. Do you know how many bludgers to the head I got last year? I stopped counting at 12.”

You opened your mouth before scrunching up your nose in the prospect of silence. 

There was the other, bigger, issue. 

You were going to spend the rest of seventh year keeping your head down. If it kept your family safe, then you would happily give up quidditch for your last year at school. Quitting hurt, you wouldn’t lie to yourself that you hadn’t shed many tears over the summer as your broom sat collecting dust in the corner of your bedroom. 

Getting over the loss of your beloved sport? You would get over it eventually. 

Getting over the loss of your family?

You would learn to be a spectator in the fan section. 

James’s frown only deepened when he seemed to understand the copious amount of reasons behind your decisions behind it. He knew from first hand experience you were a phenomenal player- you had beaten him several times last year. You were clever, quick witted, and had a sharp eye for spotting opportunities to go for goal; it wasn’t fair. 

Both of you stayed quiet for a moment, the sound of a bell chiming cutting through the weight of the situation. 

He expelled all of the air from his cheeks, nodding slowly like he was coming to understand everything- at least to understand the best he could. 

“Alright,” James finally said, his voice soft but determined. "How can I help?”

Out of everything you’d expected him to say, that wasn’t it. 

“What?” you blurted out. Your confused scowl didn’t deter the intent look he wore. With a sigh, you ran a hand down your face. “James, you can’t do anything. It’s done. I turned it down. The only thing you can do is beat him this season.”

“No, I can do more than beat him on the field.” He stepped closer, ducking his head so he could keep your eye. 

James didn’t want to just beat Kaston this season. He was going to obliterate him. 

“Help me coach Gryffindor.”

You almost thought you’d misheard him. “I’m sorry, what now?” 

“Help me this year with coaching the Gryffindor team,” he reiterated without missing a beat. 

Oh, so you had heard him right. 

“What? No,” you hissed back in an attempt to keep your surprise from projecting itself, “I can’t just… help you coach…” It came out less like a statement and more like a question. 

“Why not?” James didn’t miss a beat. When you tried to turn away, his body moved to cut you off. “You know the Slytherin team better than anyone, and you're a damn good player. That's why you were captain in the first place, right?”

 You pointed a finger at his chest and he wrapped his hand around your wrist. There was nothing you could do to escape the urgency in his eyes, like he was pleading for you to consider what he was offering. 

“You want me to… what,” you asked tentatively, “Help you coach your team on everything I know about the Slytherins plays in hopes to beat them?”

To spill all of the secrets you’d learned the past six years? To work on plays with James, the captain of the Gryffindor team so that they would win? 

Once you said exactly what he meant, he nearly beamed with excitement. 

“Yes! You can help me figure out the best drills for the team, give me tips and advice, make sure the people I choose for the team are well suited for the positions I put them in. You can directly help take down Kaston on the field.”

You shook your head but he didn’t even falter. Not even the way you looked like him like he’d grown a third head made a dent in his glow. Burning, burning burning; he was glowing white hot like the sun and you were going to get burned. 

"What do you think? I think it's a positively brilliant idea- one of my best yet," he grinned. 

"I think that James Potter has officially lost his mind."

He just laughed, eyes never leaving your face as they scanned your expression. It was like when you watched him fall down the stairs, how he’d laughed and you’d wondered why you didn’t just throw yourself down them to see what was so funny. 

“It's not just about beating them. It's about humiliating them.” As he spoke, James' tone grew firmer, his eyes gleaming with determination as his hands moved to shake your shoulders. "Imagine it, we’ll wipe that smirk right off Kaston's face."

Your doubt was clear but there was a flicker of something else- a spark of temptation.

“James, no,” you said sternly. 

“Think about it.” “No, I will not-”

“Come on, just for a second; really think about it.”

“I am not entertaining this-” “No one even has to know you were involved! Think about how he would feel not being able to carry his team to victory after a muggleborn did it the year before.”

That made the rest of your protests die on your lips. James nearly grimaced, attempting to reel himself back in and not scare you off because you were considering it. Albeit reluctantly, you were at least thinking about the possibility. 

“Think about it…” His eyebrow raised cautiously. “Think about how he’s going to feel when he realizes he can’t do something you did.”

How pureblooded Kaston would feel when he couldn’t do something a mudblood did.

Fuck. 

“Fine. I’ll think about it,” you conceded. James somehow beamed even brighter, the feeling contagious as you laughed and he shook you enthusiastically again. 

You tried to make your face more serious. “I’m saying I’ll consider it. I’m not saying yes but… I’m not saying no.”

“Brilliant!” His grip on your shoulders loosened, letting his arms fall to his sides. "Yes! You won't regret this, I promise. We're gonna destroy them this year, I swear it."

“I said *maybe*. I need to think about it. So it’s just… it’s a maybe.”

Both of you stayed like that, biting down on smiles and standing closer than you realized. This close, you could make out the knick of a scar on his cheekbone, so faded that it had to be from his childhood. Words to describe his beauty easily escaped you. Those words were harder to retrieve with the way he was watching you. 

“I miss something,” Sirius said out of nowhere, appearing from behind a shelf with his bag of purchases and looking between you. Your trance was broken, both of you stepping apart. 

James recovered immediately with a crooked smile. 

"Yeah, mate, there's something going on," James responded, slinging an arm over your shoulders and guiding you towards the door. "Guess who just agreed to help... coach Gryffindor?"

“I did not agree.” 

After only a few steps out into the street, busy with witches and wizards as they shopped, you gave up on trying to dislodge yourself from under his arm. You chuckled to yourself, James doing the same when you nudged his ribs with your elbow. 

Sirius turned with a smirk as he led the group towards The Leaky Cauldron. "Just how friendly have the two of you been?” He asked, his tone mischievous.

“Shut it, Pads,” James replied. He got back at him by throwing his other arm over his friend's shoulder.

Sirius let out a yelp when he nearly spilled the quidditch supplies he carried. 

“I’ve just convinced our dear friend here to help us obliterate the snake house. Imagine, all three of us working together. We'll crush them so hard they won’t know what hit them."

You rolled your eyes, “Can I just remind everyone that I am still a part of said snake house. 

"Details, details," James grinned, dismissing that fact with a waive of his hand. 

quid pro quo masterlist main masterlist

[oh-starstarstar]

harry potter masterlist.

— * indicates smut!

i. marauders:

-remus lupin:

pretty when you cry*

why do you do that?* (+ s.b)

poly!marauders jealous smut*

daily reminder.

-sirius black:

why do you do that?* (+r.l.)

poly!marauders jealous smut*

-james potter:

poly!jily thoughts*

poly!marauders jealous smut*

ii. lightening era:

-draco malfoy:

-theo nott:

-pansy parkinson:

[hemmingsleclerc]

.·:*¨¨*:·. 𖣁 .·:*¨¨*:·.

pls tell me if someone who follows me likes the marauders or harry potter itself!

I'm dying to write something based on that!!!

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Running from the Daylight (oneshot)

Regulus Black AU

Request: @iluvthe-marauders HI LOVELYYY, HAVENT HAD TUMBLR IN AGESSSSS. Dont know if you remember but i was the one who asked for different harry potter characters and wanted to ask if you'd do a regulus oneshot. where y/n is a halfblood (Remus’ sister) and they run away together?

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader

Rating: T

Song in Chapter: Running from the Daylight by Concrete Castles

____

Now it's do or die, runnin' from the daylight. Have we had enough? What have we become? Nowhere left to hide. Runnin' from the daylight…Runnin' from the daylight

You stood in the mid-morning sun at the farmer’s marker simply enjoying the spring day. Winter had been hard. It was too long and cold with too many losses for your side. Now the promise of a “fresh” spring brought you fresh hope that The Order would somehow have a lot more “wins.”

“Y/n, what do you think of this?”

Your thoughts were interrupted by Sirius’ happy giggling. Turning, you met your best friend’s gaze as he held up what looked like a stuffed cat in a dress. Raising an eyebrow, you shook your head with an annoyed chuckle. It didn’t matter what was going on in the world…Sirius knew how to make you laugh.

“I’ll miss him.”

The thought hit you like a hex to the stomach. You forced a smile so Sirius wouldn’t suspect anything was up. You took a deep breath Sirius occupied himself with bothering Remus. Staring at your older your heart ached a little more.

He will be fine. Sirius will look after him.

It was only a few short hours before your life changed forever. You had made plans to run away with Regulus. The two of you would run away from everything and start a new life. A new life together…just the two of you in some quaint little country cottage where all of the horrors of “the real world” would forever evaporate. It would be just Regulus and yourself, living the life of a happy couple.

Regulus

Your heart smiled thinking about your “secret” boyfriend. For two years, you had been dating Regulus in private. Secret dating was what it had to be. You were a half-blood and that would never be good enough for the Blacks. Walburga would have a massive fit if she found out that her baby boy was dating a half-blood. Never, in any universe, would you be good enough for Regulus (in his parent's eyes.). If they knew about Remus’ “furry little problem” the “you’re not good enough” view would only be magnified.

If they only knew that I saved him. I am the one who put the light back behind his eyes.

You thought with a smile. If it hadn’t been for you Regulus would have put a fork in a toaster. He told you this himself one night after making love. That conversation itself was one that made you want to get Regulus away even more. You wanted to make sure that another cold frown would never pass over his gorgeous face again.

We will be a cute little married couple. We can get a cat and do all of the mundane things that we never thought would happen.

You smiled at the thought. For the first time in your life, you weren’t craving action or adventure. Instead, you were craving the normally boring slow life that your parents had.

When you had brought up the idea of running away, Regulus had been all for it. He was ready to walk away from the Death Eaters and Lord Voledmort. Regulus no longer cared about his family’s name. Being a member of the House of Black no longer had the “ring” to it that it once did. Regulus was, instead, ready to have that normal boring life where the two of you were just people….just people. It wouldn't matter that he was a pure-blood or you were a half-blood. Instead, Regulus would be the husband who would bring in the newspaper in the mornings while you made coffee.

“I wonder what they are doing at the lowly farmer’s market?”

Remus’ voice pulled you from your thoughts. Looking up, you froze seeing Regulus and Walburga across the next aisle.

“Mum probably got word that she can find weird shit to feel her house with. I should take her that cat.”

Sirius added as your eyes met Regulus’. He gave you a slight smile as your hand reached up to touch the emerald necklace that he had given you.

“Forget the cat, Sirius. The woman is bad news.”

Remus added, nervously. He didn’t have any love lost for Walburga. In fact, Remus was banking on the old bitch dying sooner rather than later. After Walburga nearly killed Sirius, Remus had no use for her. Remus was ready to kick in the door to Grimmauld Place and off the lot of the monsters within.

“Reggie is looking good though.”

Sirius commented sadly. The tone in Siruis’ voice told you everything that you already knew. Sirius missed Regulus.

“He will be fine. He’s a smart boy. I’m sure that he will see the things that you saw eventually.”

You commented, hoping to bring Sirius some comfort. You were the one that Sirius told his worries about Regulus too.

“I’m afraid he will end up like the lot of them. I don’t want to see the boy that I know become a monster.”

Those words replayed in your head over and over as you looked at Regulus again. You wished nothing more than to be able to tell Sirius that you were going to save Regulus. It would be you that took him away and Sirius would have nothing to worry about. Maybe in time, you could invite Sirius and Remus to your new home. You could show them that they had nothing to worry about.

“Yes, he does. Sirius, it will be fine. Regulus is a smart boy.”

Sirius sighed and wrapped an arm around your waist.

“Yes, he is. One can only hope that he will see reason. Come on, let's get back to the house and fix that soup.”

The rest of the afternoon and evening passed slowly. At 10 pm you were due to meet Regulus at the train station. The two of you would take the last night train to your predetermined destination. All that you had to do was wait for Sirius and Remus to act like the little old couple and go to bed.

Around 7 pm, Sirius stretched and stood up. He gave you a smile before looking at his lover.

“There is a new movie playing down at the muggle Cinema. How about we go catch a movie? James and Lily are up for it?”

Remus nodded in agreement. He was all up for an evening out. Most nights were busy with order stuff. The thought of “getting out of the house” acting as if things were normal sounded absolutely amazing.

“Great idea. Y/n, are you coming?”

You shook your head.

“As much as I would love to, I have a bit of a headache and want to call it an early night. Tell James and Lily that I love them.”

Remus slowly got up to find his abandoned jumper. Your comment didn’t raise any red flags for him.

“We will. Would you like us to bring you anything home?”

You shook your head before standing up.

“No, I’m fine. Thank you though.”

You went to Remus and wrapped your arms around him. The realization that this would be the last hug that you gave your brother for some time hit hard. Remus seemed a little surprised at first but hugged you back.

“That’s a nice hug. I’m only going to the movies.”

He commented as you went to Sirius and did the same thing. Sirius, meanwhile, hugged you back just as dramatically.

“I know but I made a goal to never let either of you leave without hugging you. Both of you know how crazy the times are and what if something happens and I don’t hug you before you go?”

Remus gave you that comforting older brother expression as Sirius hugged you again.

“Y/n, everything will be okay. I know it doesn’t feel that way now but in time everything will be fine.”

You nodded as Sirius sauntered off to pull on his leather jacket.

“Remus is right, love. It won’t be long until we grill old lord Voldy’s head or shove it on a stick. We will look back on all of this and laugh.”

Sirius and Remus had been gone for half an hour when there was a quiet knock on the door. You stood up and opened it, relieved to see Regulus on the other side.

“Love.”

You said softly before wrapping your arms around his shoulders. Regulus carefully walked the two of you into the house..

“Are dumb and dumber gone?”

You nodded.

“They went to a movie. What are you doing here early? Not that I’m not super happy to see you…I have been thinking about you since this morning.”

Regulus gently shoved you against the door before pressing himself against you. You sighed happily as he tilted your head to the side and began peppering your neck with kisses.

“Have you now? What a coincidence because I have been thinking about you nonstop. Your pretty face is always on my mind. I couldn’t wait to get my arms around you. Seeing you at that market and not being able to get to you…”

You placed a hand on his mouth.

“If your bitchy mother wasn’t there and I wouldn’t have to mop the floor with her face I would have snogged you right there on the spot.”

Regulus chuckled. He had grown used to your “I’m going to snog you in any place that I want” comments.

“She would have died with a heart attack…not that I would be complaining.”

Regulus murmured before glancing over his shoulder. Even though you said that Remus and Sirius were gone, Regulus still felt the need to check. The last thing that he wanted was for either man to catch the two of you snogging by the door. If they walked in and heard everything, it would ruin the plan of running away.

Regulus had worked too hard to have his plan ruined now. Over the past few weeks, he had been securing the two of you a safe life in a little Swiss village far away from the wizarding world both of you knew. Regulus had been in contact with his uncle Alphard Black and discussed an escape plan.

Alphard offered his summer home in Switzerland as a home for the two of you while Regulus (little by little) emptied his Gringotts bank. Regulus wanted to make damn sure that the two of you would never want for anything. Would both of you be gone from England forever? Regulus didn’t know. For now, however, Regulus had to plan as if returning home would never happen.

“Are you ready to go?”

Regulus asked, pulling himself from his thoughts. You nodded and picked up a small bag. Regulus raised an eyebrow.

“One bag?”

You shook your head.

“No, I used an extension charm. I have everything that we could need in here.”

Regulus smirked.

“Why am I not surprised? Are you still wanting to go? I know how close you are to your brother and my brother…”

You pressed your lips to Regulus’ again.

“Of course, I want to go. I left Remus and Sirius a letter. I’m sure they will be upset but in time, they will understand. I want nothing more than to share a life with the man that I love.”

A small smile played at Regulus’ lips as he reached for your coat.

“You always know what to say. Now let's get out of here before we start fucking on the couch.”

You slipped on your coat and picked up the small bag. Looking around the house, you took a moment to be thankful for your friends and family. You had never been much of the praying type but for once you prayed that sooner or later fate would bring all of you back together. Maybe in time, your friends would understand why you were taking this action and would forgive you.

It's the things that we do for love…

_____

@geeksareunique @jessyballet @knreidy1 @fific7 @dumbbunnys-safes @siriuslyceleste @ad-astra-again @justfinishthis @mimisparkle12 @teletubiswszpilkach @spideyxalmighty @lucasfilms77 @rubyroscoe1 @readtomeregulus @regulusblackswhorecrux @i-love-scott-mccall @taylor-will-be-the-death-of-me @s-we-e-t-t-ea @woohoney @abaker74 @regulus-black-223048 @saramaple @missgorldafirst @millies0bsimp @stelleduarte @dumybitch @gugggu6gvai @jag9000 @bennyberry @f4iryluvy @panpride @haroldpotterson @mentally-unstable-hoe @goldensunshineshit @padf00ts-l0ver @marichromatic @ravenhood2792 @playmore-zeppelin @authoressskr @emiwrites3reads @rogue-nyx88 @coffeeaddictednymph @knight-of-gleefulness @shaylybaby2032 @livshifts @ell0ra-br3kk3r

[anjaelle]

White Light | Part IX

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Pairing: Ghost!Aaron Taylor-Johnson x Black!Reader Warnings: Purgatory, Darkness, Death, Creepy imagery Word Count: 1.7K Summary: No one can defy the natural cycle of birth, life, and death. Except...what if you really want to? A/N: Solo!Reader chapter but SUPER necessary as we go into the final part. Plus surprise new headers for this chapter and the final chapter. Yay!

[Part I] | [Part II] | [Part III] | [Part IV] | [Part V] | [Part VI] | [Part VII] | [Part VIII] | [☁Masterpost ☁] | [♫The Crimson Zombies Mixtape ♫]

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

You always had the belief that the liminal space between the afterlife and the living was paper thin. It had to be. How else could someone get trapped in the space between the two?

It felt like you were falling for an eternity.

Someone was holding you. As they were roughly pulled away, they called your name...you think. But they were too far away for you to register what it was.

You just wanted to sleep, but the darkness wouldn't let you. Voices echoed around you, whispering indecipherable words in languages you barely understood. They overlapped. Some were yelling, some laughing. You heard a sob, and a scream, and angry shouting.

Through it all, you heard the hoarse, shallow breathing of an unknown thing. You could feel its hot breath on the back of your neck, you smelled the unmistakable stench of decay and blood. You remembered the image of the thing with many sharp teeth, dripping black spit, and wide yellow eyes, staring at you from the corner of a room. Lying in wait. For what? You didn't know. But it grinned at you as it passed your vision and circled you curiously.

"Oh...oh...oh...It's you, little fox...fox...fox."

Little fox...little fox.

You're not supposed to be here, little fox.

She's not sssssupposed to be here...here...here

You tried to open your mouth to speak, but there was nothing to open. You floated through the dark without a body, without pain, without care. Just thoughts. You weren't afraid, though you felt like you should've been.

You wondered how the voices knew you.

"I've always known you, little fox...fox...fox. As I knew your mother, and her mother before her....her...her."

Am I dead? Is this the afterlife?

The overlapping whispers stopped at all once, replaced with deafening silence. The many-toothed thing laughed sharply. If you could see it properly, you're sure it would've thrown its grotesque head back in jest. And when you turned to follow the sound, it merely circled you again, dancing out of reach.

"My brave girl, you know exactly where you are."

You didn't even know your own name, let alone where you were and what you were supposed to do. The many-toothed thing tsked.

"I told the boy he could not have you. His soul was mine to take," the thing let out a low, tired sigh, "Oh, but he latched onto you, little fox. As stubborn as they come. You and your mother are quite similar."

There it was again. You struggled to think of your mother, but her face was just a vague image in your memory. As if by request, an image flashed of a woman who looked incredibly familiar, sitting on the floor of a house with the apparition of a woman sitting across from her. They held hands as the woman who was presumably your mother whispered over a candle.

"She tried desperately to save her." The thing whispered, sorrowfully, "But I warned her that saving a soul would always require a sacrifice."

She shifted, and it was then that you noticed that she was pregnant.

Was that you?

"Yessss," the thing answered, circling you again, "I told her that she could save her friend. But only if I could have you. And she chose you--as any mother would. But, oh, she was not happy to lose her. It was no surprise when she stopped answering me. But I've always...always loved her. And I've always known you."

The sincerity in the thing's voice caught you off guard. Small flashes of memory resurfaced of your mother shoving boxes in the back of the closet and covering mirrors. You thought she'd gone mad.

You felt a pang of familiarity in your chest.

"You can't save the boy."

The boy? You struggled to remember a face. A name. You could only remember the feeling.

"You...cannot...save him. Let him go."

Why?

"What's gone is gone and cannot be retrieved."

You didn't believe that. You felt something shift. Like the space around you was charged with electricity. You knew you didn't have a physical body here, but you could almost feel the vibrations in the air where your fingertips would be.

Is time linear here? How long have I been gone?

"You need to move on, little fox."

No. I'm not done. I'm not ready. I'm...I have to do something. I have to at least try.

The thing sighed, the scent of death wafted over you. You'd grown used to it.

Suddenly you were blinded by a bright white light, and the liminal space was a hallway with dozens of doors lined up on either side. You could hear the humming of voices, the slamming of the doors, the echoes of passing spirits.

You looked down and found your body in its rightful place. The bloom of blood drenched the side of your shirt, though you could no longer feel the pain of the wound. The memories of what happened slammed into you and you fell to your knees, gasping for breath like you'd been submerged underwater. And as you tried to regain your bearings, you tried to remember everything you'd been taught. Your grandmother told you about this once. She told you about walking in the space between, looking through the doors.

To think you believed for years that everything about your family's legacy was bullshit.

The many-toothed thing appeared beside you, floating in a shadow and causing the lights of the hall to flicker as it passed them. Its long, sharp fingernail pointed down the hall to a door.

"Go, little fox."

"Where does that door lead to?"

It didn't answer. It simply pointed before shrouding its face in the shadows once more.

You hesitated, unsure of where this was going to leave you. You didn't have a heartbeat anymore, but if you did, you're sure you would've heard it in your ears. Your hands shook. You broke out into a run, knowing walking would just prolong the inevitable.

As the door drew closer, the air shifted. It felt warmer. Brighter. You shoved the door open and began falling again.

Down...down...down. Through a bright white light, and the overlapping voices calling your name.

One familiar voice shouted for you, but before you could answer, you slammed into something hard and blacked out.

─ ·𖥸· ─

Your hearing was the first to return to you. Sort of. The ringing in your ears made your head pang, and you didn't even want to open your eyes. A low groan escaped your mouth. The wind was inevitably knocked out of you like you'd been hit by a truck. The strange, yet familiar humid cold in the air seeped into your skin and made you shiver, and you realized you weren't wearing a coat.

Why was it so cold?

"...Darling? Sweetheart? Are you alright?" The kind voice of an older woman pulled you into the present. You just wanted to lay down forever. Maybe take a nap. A few other voices joined in, asking if you were alright. Someone gently shook you.

You opened your eyes, squinting at the five faces floating into your field of vision. Unfamiliar, but concerned all the same. It suddenly struck you that they could see you. And touch you.

So you weren't dead?

As you worked to sit up, the older woman in a thick coat and nurse's scrubs gently held your back and guided you into the sitting position. She reminded you of your grandmother which gave you a strong level of comfort.

"There you go," she cooed softly, "easy now. That was a nasty fall, sweetheart. Are you alright? Do you need to go to the hospital?"

Her badge said New York Presbyterian, so you gathered she was just coming off of work. You felt a small pang of guilt for some unknown reason.

You cleared your throat.

"Yeah I'm fine, thank you." You struggled to get it out. Once it was confirmed that you weren't on the brink of death, the small crowd dispersed except for the woman who looked you over for signs of a concussion, no doubt. She took out a small light and checked your eyes.

"Do you know your name?" She asked. You told her, happy that you could remember it now.

"Do you know where you are?" You looked around, peering at the buildings in the north. The skyline looked...off. Different. You squinted, then turned to the south. You froze.

No...no no no.

Where the fuck was the Freedom Tower? Why was there a gaping hole in the skyline where a building should be? You felt your heart begin to race. The skyline wasn't right. It didn't look right.

"I-- we're in l-lower Manhattan. Right?"

"Good! Do you know the date?" You hesitated. How long were you gone? And how did you end up in the street? You looked down at your clothes and saw they were no longer bloody. What happened?

"Um...I don't...know." You admitted, sheepishly.

"Do you know the year, at least?" She coaxed in concern, a frown pulling at her mouth as she tucked one of her gray curls behind her ear.

"T-two...thousand..." You began. Your mouth couldn't even finish the sentence before she tutted and held your elbow.

"Okay let's get you to the hospital. You might be alright, but we wanna just make sure."

As you got to your feet, majorly disgusted by the fact that you had your head and hands on the nasty sidewalk, you grasped her hand.

"Can you please tell me what year it is?" You begged. The realization hit you in the chest at full speed.

"It's 2003, sweetheart." She answered, concern laced in her tone. "It's February 3rd, 2003."

So this was where the door led you.

You didn't want to believe it. You wanted to stifle the optimism growing in your chest, but you couldn't help the wide grin pulling at your lips. You probably looked like a crazy person.

A quick glance in a storefront window confirmed this. Your hair was a mess, you were wearing summer clothes in the winter, and you had a dazed look in your eye. But you were you. And you were HERE.

You had to find him. And FAST.

You are now entering...

NEW YORK CITY. 2003.

[padsmoony04]

Oh, to be loved by him... What beautiful, fun, and unique feeling that would be...

[mezsygfs]

Ever hear a song someone else is playing and just think "this is so marauders coded" BUT YOU CAN'T SAY ANYTHING CAUSE HOW ON EARTH ARE YOU GONNA EXPLAIN YOU HAVE CREATED YOUR OWN LITTLE WORLD BASED OFF THE HARRY POTTER FRANCHISE ABOUT HIS DAD AND 3 BEST FRIENDS.

[petitemistletoe]

Grudges Part II

Pairing: Regulus Black x Reader, Potter!Reader

Warnings: angst!

Word Count: 3.5K+

A/N: There is a LOT of jumping around in this one, pay attention closely to the stars that signify scene changes. The Daily Prophet article took me longer than I'd like to admit so please appreciate it. Once again, some people were not able to be tagged :( so sorry!

Grudges Part I

“This really isn’t my fight.” Lily said, looking between you and James in confusion. 

“Isn’t it?” You asked, cocking your head to the side, “James and I didn’t have any problems before you came into the picture. If you weren’t around, James and I would not have fought during the match, I wouldn’t have a shoulder injury that I still suffer from today, and James would not have taken my spot with the Bats.” You crossed your arms. 

✰

A deep ache in your shoulder wrenched you out of sleep. You grabbed your shoulder harshly and sighed, blinking the sleep out of your eyes. You were able to see a few rays of sun had broken the horizon, so you knew that the morning was not far off. You turned and felt around the side of the bed and realized Regulus wasn’t there. You pulled yourself out of bed and made your way down the stairs of the Black house. 

Your parents were not thrilled that you were spending so much time at the Black estate with Regulus, but they figured that anything that made you happy after your shoulder injury, relationship with James, and your promise of going pro in Quidditch all shattered, there was not much they could say. Regulus’s parents were out for the weekend so you had the entire estate to yourselves. The place was creepy, to say the least, and Regulus had promised that you two were going to move into somewhere much nicer and happier once the two of you graduated. 

You were on the stairs, rubbing your eyes and thinking about making a nice cup of tea when you heard Regulus whispering to someone. You stopped on the stairs and listened for a moment.

“This isn’t going to go over well.” Regulus sighed. 

“I tried to tell him not to. That it would only make things worse, but, he wouldn’t listen to me. And can you blame him? It’s an unbeatable opportunity.” The other voice said. 

“For someone who wants to reconcile, he’s really driving the knife in.” Regulus said bitterly. 

“There’s nothing I can do. Remus and I already said our piece.” The voice mirrored Regulus’s sigh. It must have been Sirius. You made your way down the staircase and saw Regulus and Sirius sitting at the kitchen table while Kreacher grumbled over with a tray of tea.

“Blood traitor in the Black house.” Kreacher growling, slamming the tray on the table and glaring at Sirius. 

“Go away you disgusting rat.” Sirius brushed Kreacher off with wave of his hands. 

“Milk and sugar, Kreacher.” Regulus ordered. 

“Sirius, what are you doing here?” You asked, taking a seat at the table next to Regulus. 

“Hey, surprised to see you up, it’s early.” Sirius said with a nervous smile. 

“My shoulder hurt. What are you doing here?” You pressed. 

“I was just telling Regulus some news.” Sirius chewed at his thumbnail. 

“What is he talking about, Regulus?” You turned to Regulus. 

“James Potter has taken your position with the Ballycastle Bats.” Kreacher said, setting down the milk and sugar on the table.

“You foul little roach.” Sirius roared, sending a couple of a shocking hexes Kreacher’s way. Kreacher was able to dodge all but one, which zapped him in the elbow. He rubbed his elbow ruefully and glared at Sirius before disappearing down a dark corner. 

“James took my Ballycastle offer?” You blinked. 

“I’m so sorry, love.” Regulus bowed his head.

“That makes complete sense.” You nodded. 

“Remus and I tried to tell him not to.” Sirius grabbed at your hand but you snatched it back. 

“No, no that makes sense. It’s a great opportunity. I would know.” You shook your head. “You should probably go, Sirius.” Regulus said quietly. 

“Sirius will you pass on a message to James for me?” You asked. 

“Of course.” Sirius said with wide eyes. 

“Tell him that I hope he drops dead.”

✰

“I want you to know that I told James not to take the position.” Lily said with her head bowed. 

“You expect me to believe that?” You said, crossing your arms across your chest. 

“It’s true,” Remus insisted. “Give her your memory, Lily. We have a pensieve.” 

“I don’t need that.” You started but Lily had already pulled the silvery memory from her temple as the pensieve pulled itself from its closet. 

✰

“How’d it go?” Lily asked as James slammed the front door shut.  

“Terrible.” James said, dropping onto the couch and putting his head in his hands. Lily sat next to him and rubbed his back for a few minutes. 

“Is she going to be alright?”

“She’ll survive. But she’ll never ever play quidditch again. Her shoulder is completely fucked and it’s all my fault.” James released a shaky sigh. 

“Oh James, she’s your cousin, I’m sure she’ll forgive you. It just takes time, okay.” Lily said. James only nodded, crying in Lily’s arms for a few moments. There was an owl at the front window, carrying a rather large package on its back and pecking harshly. Lily stood and retrieved the package, placing a sickle in the owl’s claw before it flew off. 

“What is it?” James asked, rubbing his nose harshly. 

“It’s for you.” Lily said, placing the package in front of him. James tore through the package and gasped. It was your broom, in shambles, with the hilt of the broom covered in your blood. 

“Oh my God,” James pressed his fingers over his mouth to stop himself from retching. 

“Is that her broom?” Lily asked, her own fingers shaking.

“Yeah it is. It’s the broom I bought her for her fifteenth birthday.” James said, studying the inscription on the hilt. The gold lettering was splattered in dark red blood. 

“Okay,” Lily pushed the package out of James’s hands, “she’s very, very angry. But we need to remember that she’s been hurt. Badly.”

“She goaded me into it.” James said, standing and making an angry circle around the couch. 

“Goaded you into what?” Lily asked. 

“Pulling her broom. She could’ve hurt me just as easily and she said all those foul things about you. She was goading me.” James spat. 

“James, she’s the one that’s injured. She was a fantastic player and she’s lost everything now because of that game. Isn’t that punishment enough?” Lily knit her eyebrows. James was going to respond but another owl was at the window. He unrolled the parchment and grit his teeth. 

“It’s the scout from the Ballycastle Bats. Now that the chaser position is free they want me to sign. It’s a five year contract, handsome salary plus benefits.” James said, studying the parchment. 

“Surely you aren’t thinking of taking it?” Lily stood too.

“Lily, this is my opportunity to go pro. We’d be set for life.” 

“James,” Lily was shocked, “you will lose your cousin forever. You can’t take this job.”

“You can’t stop me.” James said, narrowing his eyes, “listen, Lily, I chose you. I sacrificed everything for you.”

“You’re prepared to lose your cousin forever?” Lily asked. 

“She’s made that decision for herself.” James said, setting the blood soaked broom hilt on top of the contract. 

✰

“Oh my God. This whole time I’ve been hating Lily. But it’s you.” You said, pulling your head out of the pensieve. 

“Listen-”

“It was you!” You shoved James back harshly, “And you had the audacity to try and come and beg my forgiveness. Own up it to, James.”

“It was me. But you know you would’ve taken the position too if you were in my shoes.” James said. 

“Oh come on, mate, what kind of apology was that?” Remus shook his head. 

“I have some memories of my own I’d like you all to see,” Regulus said, pulling his memories and casting them into the pensieve.

✰

“How are you feeling, love?” Regulus called as he shut the door behind.

“Gigantic.” You said, waddling in and resting a hand on your swollen stomach. You were due any day now and were feeling the full effect of nine long months of pregnancy. 

“I know, love, I’m so sorry.” Regulus sat with you on the couch and pulled one of your aching feet onto his lap and massaging it. 

“Why did I let you get me pregnant! It’s your fault that I’m due in August!” You groaned. 

“I know, love. You are really, really sweaty. It’s been a viciously hot summer.” Regulus said. 

“I know.” You fanned yourself with your hand.

“I mean, seriously,” Regulus laughed, “did you piss yourself or is this just sweat?”

“What are you talking about-” You felt a tight pain coil through your body, “Regulus, it isn’t piss or sweat. My water just broke.”

“Oh my God.” Regulus shot up. “We need to get you to St. Mungo’s!”

“We can’t!” You grabbed at your stomach and groaned, “I don’t think there’s time.”

“I’m going to get Remus.” Regulus disappeared. In reality, it had been less than five minutes but it felt like an eternity. Your contractions were dangerously close and you practically sobbed with relief when you saw Remus and Sirius enter your house with Regulus.

“You’re in labor? Already? We need to get you to the hospital.” Sirius said, helping you off the couch and onto the ground where Regulus had spread blankets down for you.

“How far apart are your contractions?” Regulus asked. 

“Two minutes.” You said, gritting your teeth as another contraction washed over you. 

“We can’t get to a hospital. If we try to go now, we run the risk of splinching ourselves.” Remus said as he knelt down to your level and held your hand. 

“Should I fetch Marlene?” Sirius asked.

“No,” Remus shook his head, “she’s with…Lily.” 

“Lily had her baby?” You asked, trying not to sound too interested. 

“Yesterday, a boy named Harry.” Remus said with a tight smile.

“Harry. That was my father’s name.” It was quiet and then threw your head back in pain again, “so what are we going to do now?”

“I sent an owl for a healer but…I think we’re going to have to figure this out on our own.” Regulus grabbed your other hand and brushed your hair from your forehead. 

Your labor was short, too short, and the baby had come just as the healer had arrived. 

“Look at you,” Regulus said, cradling Celeste in his arms, “your mummy did it. She’s the strongest person alive.” Regulus grinned up at you and you smiled back tiredly at him, your body was slick with sweat. 

“Mr. Black, send for three more healers. Tell them I sent you.” The healer commanded, taking a deep breath and he poked through his potion bag. 

“Go Sirius.” Regulus commanded. “What’s wrong?”

“Your wife is losing a lot of blood.” The healer said. Sirius was back within the minute with three other healers. One took Celeste from Regulus’s arms and began making sure that she was alright. The other healers helped lift you from the floor and move you onto a hospital bed. Regulus saw only then that there was a pool of blood underneath you. The healers worked tirelessly and you grabbed Regulus’s hand tightly. 

“Regulus, there’s a folder with all the important documents in the bottom drawer of the desk in the study.” You began. 

“Don’t talk like that,” Regulus said, biting back tears, “it’ll all be alright.”

“You have to tell Celeste that I love her.” There were tears running down your own cheeks. 

“You will tell her yourself, darling.” Regulus placed a gentle kiss on your knuckles. 

“Will you do something for me?” You asked. 

“Anything,” Regulus nodded. 

“I want James,” you cried, “get James please.” 

“I will.” Regulus nodded. “Sirius, come take over. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Regulus took a deep breath as he apparated to the front door of the Potter house. It had been a very long time since he had been to Godric’s Hollow. He knocked on the door, softly.

It was Effie Potter who came to the door, a large grin on her face as she opened it. Her smile faltered before she cleared her throat and said, 

“Regulus, hello dear. Is everything alright?”

“Is…is James there? I need to talk to him.”

“Did-” Effie stopped for a moment, taking a deep breath to hide her eagerness, “did she have the baby?”

“I need to talk to James, Mrs. Potter. Please.” Regulus begged. Effie gestured for Regulus to come in and then disappeared for a moment. She returned with James in tow. James was beaming, with bright red cheeks and messy hair. He stopped dead in his tracks, however, when he saw Regulus. 

“What are you doing here?” James asked, biting the inside of his cheek. 

“Congratulations…on the baby.” Regulus said, swallowing harshly. 

“Is this about her?” James pursed his lips when he referred to you. 

“She just gave birth. To a baby girl, her name is Celeste. She sort of you looks like you, James.” Regulus said. Effie’s hand jet over her mouth at the mention of Celeste. 

“James’s son is named Harry.” Effie said with a smile.

“Is that all, Regulus?” James asked, his face stony. 

“Celeste is fine. But…she’s sick. There are a bunch of healers taking care of her but she’s losing a lot of blood.” Regulus explained. Effie gasped and looked at James. 

“So what are you doing here?” James asked. 

“She’s asking for you.” 

“For me?” James sounded hopeful for a moment.

“Will you come?” Regulus asked. 

“No. I have to take care of my family.” James turned on his heel.

“I’ll talk to him, Regulus, just give me a few minutes.” Effie said. 

“Don’t bother.” Regulus said before apparating back home. The first thing he saw when he reentered his house were the healers packing up their tools. 

“What happened?” Regulus said, a rush of stress washing over him. 

“She’s fine now, stable but sleepy.” One of the healers patted Regulus on the shoulder, “Congrats Dad.”

Regulus made his way back to the living room, where you were snuggled onto a bed that had moved downstairs. Celeste was sleeping in her bassinet next to your bed. Sirius had his arms wrapped around you, whispering to you as Remus prepared tea in the kitchen. 

“Hello love,” Regulus took Sirius’s place next to you on the bed. 

“Where were you, Reg?” You asked. 

“She’s pretty sleepy and out of it,” Sirius said, flashing his eyes at Reg. Regulus nodded and pressed a kiss to your forehead. 

“Just was thanking the healers before they left. Go to sleep, love, it’s been a long day.” Regulus held you until you fell asleep. Then he joined Remus and Sirius in the kitchen. 

“He didn’t come?” Sirius asked, a distraught look on his face. 

“He said no.” Regulus shook his head.

“I can’t believe it. You told James how sick she was? How badly it looked?” Remus’s jaw dropped.

“He said he needed to stay with Lily and Harry.” Regulus wrapped his hands around his mug of tea. 

“So that’s it then,” Remus said, his shoulders sagging, “their relationship is irreparable.”

Regulus cleaned up the mugs of tea as you slept peacefully. Celeste had woken up once and you had fed her before you both passed out again. Remus stayed to help around the house while Sirius went home to rest before his important meeting in the morning with the adoption agency. Remus was upstairs, assembling some baby monitors when there was a knock at the door. Regulus furrowed his brow before walking to the door. 

“Oh wow.” Regulus said. It was James. 

“How is she?” James asked. 

“She’s alright now. Sleeping, of course.” Regulus explained. 

“And the baby? Celeste, she’s doing well?”

“Yes. How’s Harry and Lily?”

“Good, good. Can I see her, Regulus?” James pleaded. 

“I don’t think it’s such a good idea, James.” Regulus shook his head. 

“I miss her so much Regulus. I’m so so sorry for everything that I did.” James dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around Regulus’s waist. He sobbed against Regulus’s abdomen. 

“I know James. I think if you try, she’ll forgive you. She misses you too.” Regulus explained. 

“It’ll be different. I promise.” James said, standing up and wiping his eyes. “I’ll be back in a few days. Congratulations Regulus.” 

“Congratulations to you too, James.” Regulus shook hands with James before James apparated away.

✰

“Oh my God.” Regulus gasped, dropping and shattering his glass of orange juice. 

“Reg! You’re going to wake the baby!” You scolded, listening for a moment. It sounded like Celeste was still asleep so you waved your wand and cleaned up the broken glass. 

“Did you see this?” Regulus pushed the newspaper towards you.

“Oh wow.” You said, staring at your hands. 

“You’re the anonymous source aren’t you?” Regulus sighed. 

“They were going to make him captain of the Bats, Reg. That was supposed to be my job.” You said, storming off. Regulus was going to pursue but there was a knock at the door. 

“Tell her that I know what she did. I have absolutely no interest in seeing her again.” James said, throwing the newspaper at Regulus’s feet. 

✰

“The prophecy speaks of a child, born in the final days of July,” Voldemort said, stalking around the room. A shiver crawled up your spine as you felt his breath on the back of your neck. Regulus had involved you in this mess long ago and now you were both working for the resistance as double agents. You wanted to stop long before the birth of Celeste but now that she was here you wanted nothing more than to get as far away from the death eaters as possible. The order had been able to find many of the horcruxes and Regulus had had quite a bit of luck destroying the locket a few years before while leaving Voldemort none the wiser. 

Voldemort knew there was a spy, someone that was betraying him. He never fully trusted you, you being a Potter, but he trusted Regulus more than anything so the dark lord and his followers were usually more than civil with you.

But now Voldemort was angry about something. His voice was steely calm as he made his way around the room, trailing his long, disgusting fingers along the backs of chairs. “This child is supposed to lead to my downfall.” Voldemort paused for a moment as a collective intake of breath went around the room. 

“What can we do?” Amycus Carrow asked. 

“I think the more important question,” Lucius Malfoy said with a snide glare Amycus’s way, “is who is the child?”

“Severus,” Voldemort called, “would you like to answer that question?” 

“It was not as specific. But there are children who fit the parameters of the prophecy.” Snape said, pursing his lips tightly. 

“Who are the children?” Lucius Malfoy asked. 

“So far, we know of he Longbottom boy and the Black girl.” Snape looked down at his hands. 

“The Black girl?” You asked, “Are you talking about my daughter?”

“Yes, Ms. Potter, your daughter.” Voldemort said, flashing his eyes dangerously at you. He always insisted on calling you Potter, wanting to separate you from Regulus.

“Our daughter was born August first.” Regulus said, gripping your hand tightly. 

“According to you. The healers did not arrive until after the baby was born.” Lucius said. 

“Stop it,” Narcissa whispered, resting her hand on top of Lucius’s. 

“Your daughter poses quite a threat.” Voldemort picked up his wand delicately. 

“There’s another child. Born on July 31st.” You blurted out. Regulus turned to look at you pointedly. 

“Who?” Voldemort asked. 

“Lily and James Potter have a son. Harry.” You said, “It could be him.” 

“I have underestimated you, Mrs. Black,” Voldemort said with a grin, “Harry Potter.”

✰

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Regulus screamed after you arrived home. 

“He was talking about Celeste, Regulus! My daughter. Our daughter!” You said, threading your hands in your hair. 

“You have to tell them. You have to warn them.” Regulus shook his head.

“I know. I know. I’ll go right now.” You apparated back. There were tears running down your cheeks as you banged on Lily and James’s door. It was Lily who answered and she took a small step back before saying,

“I am very surprised to see you.”

“Voldemort’s coming. He heard a prophecy about a child born in July who would be his downfall and he thinks its Harry.” You said quickly. 

“What? Why does it think it’s Harry?” Lily asked, her eyes wide. 

“Get a secret keeper. Don’t tell anyone I told you.” You apparated away before Lily could respond. 

✰

“I owe you an apology,” you said. 

“You…you put my entire family in danger with Voldemort, you got me kicked off of the Bats and nearly disgraced by the entire Quidditch community.” James said. 

“You impaled me with my broom and refused to see me when I was on the brink of death.” You responded.

“Neither of one of us have been very good cousins, have we?” James smiled. 

“I’m so sorry,” you swallowed harshly against the lump in your throat. James did not respond, he rammed into you hard, wrapping his arms around you tightly. 

Taglist: @melllinaa, @noah-uhhh-what, @lonelywitchv2, @siriuslycaptainofthedawntreader, @rosariia25, @newbooksmell777, @dcgadel, @coolerthananicecubeeee, @volturissideslut, @celesteblack08, @jack1esblog, @ellen3101

[everythingisromant1c]

It's Always Been You - Chapter 4

james potter x fem!reader

summary - With rumors flying all around the school, it seems like the very last thing you need is any more drama. Nevertheless, it's come time for the annual party in the Gryffindor common room, and something in your gut is telling you that the drama isn't going to die down just yet.

wc [5.0k]

all chapters | <- Chapter 3 - Chapter 5 ->

You didn't know why you'd let Marlene and Lily talk you into thinking your outfit was a good idea. It had felt like it'd be something fun and new while you were coddled in the comfort of your dorm, but now that you were in the crowded Gryffindor common room in the middle of a party, you reckoned you'd give it twenty more minutes before you went back upstairs to change.

The fabric of your top hugged your body in a way you didn't think you'd ever get used to, and the stoop of the neckline only had you more on edge. You toyed with the necklace you were wearing, idling against the steps on the far side of the bustling room.

"Stop overthinking your outfit and go party."

Marlene strolled in from next to you wearing a tired smirk, swirling around a cup of something you couldn't see but could certainly smell.

Your lips parted in surprise. "How did you-"

"Your face gives away how you're feeling like reading a book." She took a sip of her drink, wincing. "Surprised Potter hasn't found out you're in lo-"

With widened eyes you swatted her in the arm, coming close to knocking over her beloved drink. She reeled back. "What the bloody hell was that for?"

"Not so loud." You scolded in a hushed tone, peeking around at the dozens of people hovering around the both of you in the tight space of the common room. "And I'm not in love with him, Marlene." You crossed your arms in front of your chest, rubbing at the sides of them. "I'm over him."

"First of all, it's a party. No one can hear us." You looked past Marlene to all the dancing people around you, rowdy and probably not listening, and sighed. She was probably right, but that didn't change the fact that her voicing your feeling for James allowed made your mind flare in alarm, especially after all the rumors going around. "You know I'm right," she deadpanned. "Second of all, no you're not."

You stared at her confusedly, until she mouthed "over James."

Your lips parted in offense. "Yes I am." She titled her head at you like she pitied you and it made you want to shake her senseless until she believed you. "I've been moving on steadily," you chided again, nodding like you were declaring it to yourself too. "I mean it."

And you did. At least you were trying to mean it. That didn't mean it wasn't hard.

You'd been wandering through the crowd in search of nothing in particular, maybe a drink, when you heard a laugh—James's laugh. He'd always had the kind of laugh that you always recognize, even across a crowded room. It was filled with a bubbling homeliness that you always found yourself missing, and right now, it had you finally making your way towards him through the crowd. You felt a surge of nervousness settle underneath your skin when you saw him.

You came to stand behind him, finding him with Remus, and tapped him on his shoulder. He turned curiously behind him, noticing it was you who had tapped him as his face greeted yours with a smile.

You opened your mouth to say hello, but a dancing someone bumped into you from behind, sending you stumbling forward. James caught you, hands steadily holding your waist as your hands braced against his chest.

You knew you'd flushed right away, feeling the warmth on your cheeks as soon as you felt James's firm chest beneath your fingers. You didn't think he noticed though, because he was too busy trying to scope out whoever had bumped into you.

"Hey," he called sternly to the boy now to your right, tone harboring indignation. You shook your head, gingerly squeezing James's arm to get his attention. You ignored the obvious muscles of his bicep in your hand.

"Don't worry about it," you told James lowly. "It was probably an accident."

He turned back to you, hands still holding onto your waist steadyingly. "He pushed you."

You smiled in affection at his reaction. "It's a party. And I'm fine, promise."

Letting out a breath through his nose, James relented, turning to give you his full attention. A second went by before he said anything, and you hated how focused you were on the feelings of his hands still on your waist, meeting the bare skin revealed by the top you were wearing.

"Wow," he whispered. He said something else that you couldn't hear, and you frowned.

"What?" you asked, and right away James stooped his head downwards so that his lips rested right by your ear.

"I said," he began softly, hand still braced on your torso as your entire body lit aflame. "You look beautiful."

You were momentarily stunned, basking in the way just the three words had you speechless in his arms. You looked down at your shoes, James's eyes trained on you with interest.

"James," you whispered reluctantly as he complimented you, and he let a lopsided grin plaster over his lips. He stooped down further and met your lowered eyes with a glimmer in his own, not letting you escape him.

"I mean it," he insisted softly.

He stood back up fully, taking a step back, and you could finally think straight. But then you took in his own appearance and your mind was hazing over again, because all you could think about was how good he looked.

His chocolatey curls were perfectly messy but shining, and the formfitting t-shirt he was wearing paired with his jeans made him look like he came straight out of a catalog, though you were sure he hadn't given more than a second thought to the outfit. James always looked effortlessly handsome in that way.

Before you could compliment him back, you heard a voice call James's name. He turned towards it, a familiar boy greeting him with a rugged hug. When they pulled apart, he began asking him something about Quidditch.

As Captain, James had been determined to assemble a winning team that year, something he'd mentioned in his letters to you over the summer. The two began talking more avidly, and you took that as your time to leave and go find the others. James noticed right away and turned to you, lightly holding your elbow.

"Where are you off to, Love?"

Love. You shook the word away. "I'm just gonna go find the guys."

James nodded but looked troubled, glancing between the boy he was talking to and you. You put your hand on his, nodding reassuringly. "It's alright," you promised. "I'll meet you in a bit?"

He thought for a second before nodding. You walked off, soon hearing him strike up more conversation with the boy from behind you, their voices raised over the loud music. You went to go find something to drink, to chase away whatever you'd just felt talking to James.

A few more hours into the night had people's brains turning fuzzier, movements turning loser, and laughter getting louder. You'd went back up to your dorm room for a minute to use the bathroom, the line in the common room much too long, and by the time you came back down the stairs, a small crowd had gathered around the couch and fireplace in a circle.

You took in the scene with interest as you neared it, seeing all your friends compiled in the group too. Half sat lazily on the couch and half on the floor with their backs to the lowly simmering fire. Then you noticed the bottle sitting in the center of the circle, noticing the round of Spin the Bottle going on with dreadful recognition.

Seeing you, Marlene immediately called you over and you shook your head right away.

"Absolutely not," you said before she could even get the words out to ask you to join.

She scoffed, pouting. "Come on, even Lily's playing."

From beside her, the ginger reeled at her tone offensively.

"Oh please," argued Marlene before turning back to you. She yanked your arm excitedly until you were sitting on the ground next to her, facing the couch where James, Sirius, Peter, and a few other students sat.

Remus stood leaning against the back of the couch with a bottle to his lips, and you caught his glimmering eyes as he dryly smiled down at you before tipping his head back to drink. You noticed the bottle he held in his hands was the same as the one that sat in the middle of the haphazard circle you'd all made.

You wanted to leave, figuring that there were probably few people in the entirety of the room you'd be remotely okay with kissing, but Marlene wasn't having any of it. You watched reluctance as Mary explained the rules of the game to everyone, jittery and full of suggestive smiles.

You let your eyes drift to where James sat in front of you on the couch, and he met your nervous eyes with a sort of amused twinkle in his own, seeming absolutely unfazed by the idea of the game. You gave him the most casual smile you could and he leaned back in his seat, legs sprawled lazily with his arm around the back of the sofa. He tilted his head to the side and made a weird but funny face down at you. You laughed under your breath, hiding it behind your hand from Marlene who you could feel watching your interaction through your peripheral.

"Everyone gets a turn," instructed Mary, voice fighting against the tunes of ABBA in the background. "Whoever the bottle lands on you have to kiss. Simple." She pointed a warning finger around. "Kisses on the cheek will not be tolerated."

The circle all gave chuckles of their own, while the uneasiness of it all set you on edge.

"If you opt out of a kiss you have to drink up to the next line." Mary picked up the bottle in the middle of the circle, and you watched as she pointed to the black lines drawn on the side of the glass bottle. "And don't worry, we made sure to get the strong stuff, so be wise about opting out!" More laughing came as she winked, putting the bottle back down on its side.

"I think I'll go first," she said, a satisfied smile plastering itself to her glossed-over lips.

Crawling forward onto her knees, she reached for the bottle on the floor in front of her and spun it. Every pair of eyes watched intently as it went round and round before landing slightly to your left, pointing to the blonde-haired girl beside you.

Immediately people cheered and laughed, watching it all go down with fascinated interest fueled by the many drinks of the night.

"Drink up Mary," joked Peter from the couch. Mary smiled even more than she already was, looking up at him with a tilted head.

"Why would I?"

Then she crawled back next to Marlene who met her with an interested raise of her brows, and waited just a second before leaning forward and kissing the blonde. Wolf whistles and cheers exploded from all around at the kiss.

You turned back to your two friends as they pulled away from each other, cheeky grins encapsulating their faces.

"Who's next?" asked Mary, unfazed as she sat back in her spot.

Sirius looked between the two girls with a slack jaw. "That was hot."

You rolled your eyes, glancing over at Marlene from next to you and nudging her in the arm playfully, happy to be on the other end of the gesture. She ignored you and kept her eyes forward inside the circle, but that didn't stop you from noticing her trying to bite back her smile.

The game continued, going clockwise around the circle from Mary. There were more kisses shared and more wolf-whistling, the bottle in the middle slowly draining after each swig that had your classmates wincing painfully every time.

The game had gotten to the other side of the circle, reaching where Remus stood against the back of the couch.

"Come on Lupin," sang Frank from across the circle. Remus shook his head, arms crossed.

"Count me out." He held up the drink that was already in his hand and knocking it back swiftly. How he could drink it so easily, you had no clue.

"Alright then," complied Mary, clapping her hands together. "Who's next?"

You all followed the line of sight from Remus over to his right, where James sat in conversation with Sirius to his own right.

"Potter!" Mary yelled, and the brunette's eyes snapped over in alarm to where she and her pointed look sat on the ground. "You're up."

Brows raised, he sat up straighter in his seat, laughing softly. A horrifying fact struck you as his eyes landed on the bottle before him—no matter where it landed, you didn't think you'd be okay with whatever followed.

Whoever the bottle landed on, you'd have to watch as James kissed a girl right in front of you and act completely unphased by it. Even with all the talks you'd had with him about Lily, you weren't even sure that was something you could do. You told yourself it didn't matter and that it was part of some game. That didn't change the fact that actually watching him with someone else might hurt too much.

James, who was directly across from you, sat completely forward on the couch to reach for the bottle and his eyes met yours through his dark lashes. The sides of his mouth perked up in a boyish grin and you let yours do the same, albeit strained. You didn't like the way you could hear your own heart start to pick up as James's hand neared the bottle.

He focused back on it, fingers winding the cool glass before spinning it. Everything seemed to slow down in the seconds that it slid in circles on the maroon rug beneath it, a dizzying feeling taking over you. It seemed to spin for hours, each pair of eyes in the group plastered to it like it was something hypnotizing. You swore that the second the bottle stilled, so did your heartbeat and all the thoughts in your head.

It was pointing at you. It was pointing at you.

A red-hot feeling of alarm blared in your chest, your thin smile dropping as you swallowed. Nobody had said anything yet, or maybe you just couldn't hear them over the blood rushing through your ears.

You slowly looked up from the bottle that remained aimed straight at you and up to James, who sat directly on the other end of it. He was already watching you.

You couldn't read from his face what he was thinking, but the intensity with which his eyes met yours made something in your chest pinch. The two of you looked at each other wordlessly for a second before James looked away first, looking down and rubbing at his neck. Sirius shook his shoulder.

"The bottle has spoken," he rang mockingly, grin a mile wide as he looked between the both of you. "C'mon you two."

"Yeah," urged Peter, and others started to join in, shouts of agreement and clapping ringing through your ears from all directions. James looked around at everyone besides you, shaking his head.

"There won't be any kissing." He said it like it was something clear, something that should've been known from the start. You watched him, unmoving. You didn't know what to think, lips parted as you sat helplessly on the ground.

A few people booed, disappointment evident. Sirius scoffed, sighing. "Then drink up, mate."

You looked on as James shifted his gaze to the bottle in front of him wordlessly. You knew he didn't dare drink around Quidditch season and that he was leading Gryffindor's first practice on Monday, but he still leaned forward to pick up the bottle. You didn't even recognize what you were doing until you said the words.

"It's okay."

James's eyes snapped up to look at you, actions pausing abruptly. He frowned down at you, brows softly furrowing in confusion. "What?"

"It's okay," you repeated, not knowing what the hell you were doing. You could feel the stares of everyone pricking on your skin. "Don't ... don't drink it."

He retracted his arm away from the bottle again, sitting up. "Are- ... are you sure?"

Absolutely not.

"Yeah."

A beat passed before everyone began cheering again, and you felt like crawling into yourself because you really didn't think this through. Kissing your best friend? That sure was one way to get over him.

You took an unsteady breath in as you sat up onto your heels, eyes set on James expectantly. When he realized you were serious, you watched as he sat up even straighter, a muscle in his jaw working as he peered at you.

He still seemed unbelieving, so you nodded at him assuringly, trying to seem lighthearted while your heart beat heavily. With a note of seriousness, he surveyed you for another second before finally getting out of his seat and nearing where you sat on the ground, sinking to a knee.

The low base of the music seemed to beat in time with your own heart, the sound seeming louder than anything else in the room to you. James's eyes never left yours despite it all, the never-ending glow of his hazel eyes weighing into your own with his gaze that seemed to sink your stomach bottomlessly. Then he got closer, leaning forward hesitantly like you'd fly away with quick movement, a mesmerizing sight.

Did he look at all the girls he kissed like that? How many girls had he kissed? How many girls had been on the other end of that look before? Merlin knows how many wanted to be. You knew people were watching, waiting, but it felt like it was just you and James in a sea of blurred sights and sounds.

A curl of his brushed against your head, soft enough to send a rush through you. Were you really about to do this?

Like he was reading your mind, he whispered, "We don't have to, you know."

You nodded delicately, but steadily. "I know."

His eyes seemed to dance in circles around your face, floating from either of your eyes and then down to your lips. You went still, letting your eyes fan shut at the feeling of his hand softly holding your cheek.

Behind the black cloaks of your eyelids, you couldn't see anything at all, only feel. You sat still, waiting for what you knew was coming, for the feeling of James's lips.

In a second, they brushed against yours, feather-light and hesitant. His fingers grazed over your cheekbone. Sightless, you leaned forward in the darkness like jumping into unknown waters, and it was you who closed the distance.

Your lips met with shyness, the kind that had every inch of you buzzing. His lips were soft, gentle and forgiving, until you felt James lean into the kiss, deepening it like something inside of him was pulling him closer to you, something he couldn't deny. The feeling consumed you and it felt like you were suffocating. Not because of a lack of air but because of the storm of butterflies that seemed to crash through you right away.

You'd expected him to pull away after a second, make the kiss as short as possible. But he didn't; Neither did you.

It struck you like the crash of a wave how much you liked kissing him, how natural it felt. People around you were cheering and whooping and, for a second, it felt like it was the sound of something right, of this thing you'd had for James ending in success. But you knew that wasn't true. It was anything but.

In alarm at just how public the kiss was, you finally pulled away, not knowing how long it had even lasted.

You were breathless, chest rising and sinking rapidly. You took in the sight of James, eyes scanning over his flushed cheeks and slightly swollen lips that had some of your lip gloss on them. It made you dizzy to think that you'd been the one to put it there.

You met his eyes and, like a magnet, the way he seemed to look at you made it feel impossible to move, made all the other sounds in the common room drown away. He swallowed, eyes flickering between both of yours, and you still couldn't tell what he was thinking.

Like coming up for air, you finally looked away from him and let yourself face everyone around you who'd seen it all, watching as your heart seemed to swell for the few seconds that the kiss lasted and then shrivel back up right before their eyes.

They each sported their own looks of both surprise and entertainment, clapping and whistling following the two of you the whole time it took James to sit back down on the couch.

There seemed to be an underlying hesitancy for a moment, like there was more to be said, but it vanished as fast as it came and Mary was calling for the next turn like clockwork.

For a moment it felt as if maybe the whole thing hadn't really happened at all, like it had been something your mind imagined in desperation. But from the way James looked, you knew it had happened.

You glanced up at him again and he was already looking at you. Pathetically, with the little strength you had left in you, you offered him another strained smile. He didn't give one back.

Your heart dropped and it felt like you were sinking. You looked away again, trying to focus on the game as if an earthquake wasn't rattling your brain all the while. You felt James look away from you finally, staring somewhere low towards his hands, maybe the rug, eyes blown wide, expression unrevealing.

You didn't think you could sit there any longer. Had he figured out how you feel about him? Was he trying to think of a way to let you down easily?

You could almost feel both Marlene and Lily's gazes on your face from either side, not helping you feel any less suffocated.

Sirius had taken his turn, kissing a girl in the year below, but you hadn't paid true attention to any of it. By the time Peter was spinning the bottle you felt your legs standing up from beneath you.

Lily stopped you, grabbing your hand as she whispered, "Where are you going?"

"Bathroom," you answered plainly, squeezing her hand reassuringly before letting go of it and leaving the circle of people. You had to push your way through the crowded room to get to the nearest bathroom in the dormitories.

Once you got inside, you walked towards the sink, taking in your appearance. You looked like you'd seen a ghost. Your first instinct was to splash water on your face, wake yourself up from whatever the hell was going on, but stopped yourself, remembering the makeup you were wearing.

It wasn't fair. This wasn't fair.

Maybe it was your own fault for even going through with the kiss, but that was something you blamed on the drink you'd had and the circle of people surrounding you, waiting. You'd thought it would be a peck, something that'd give you a blush that you could hide in the low lighting of the party, nothing more. You'd been doing good—good about not thinking about your feelings for James, that is.

But nothing could have prepared you for what you were feeling now: Confusion, because how could he have kissed you like that if it wouldn't mean anything tomorrow? Frustration with yourself, because you felt your control slipping from your grasp with every breath you took, with the way your lips still simmered from the kiss.

Everything you'd done to protect yourself, to stop yourself from feeling the hurt you'd become accustomed to for years, was becoming useless. The months you spent away in France over the summer trying to forget about James and his warm gaze and stupidly cute smile were being shot down the drain.

It felt so unfair. You were so sure you were losing feelings. It must have been a temporary trick of the mind because, through just a few moments, you felt that pit in your stomach that told you were rapidly falling back down to square one.

You had to pull yourself together and snap out of whatever this was. You knew where this helpless road ended and you weren't going to let one night ruin the rest of your year.

James didn't feel the same about you as you did for him—it was plain and simple. He never had, and he never would.

Not when you were his best friend, his "number one wingman." Not when Lily was around, effortlessly graceful and the sole person who'd had James whipped for years.

With a sting in your heart, you thought back to the moments before the kiss, where James had spun the bottle, probably hoping it would land on the red-haired girl beside you, only for it to land on you. Hell, he was even willing to drink from that mystery bottle if it meant he wouldn't have to kiss you. You thought back to the dream—or nightmare, really—that you'd had that summer, and the way James's words had stung you to the point where you could really feel it, even if it was a dream.

"As if I'd ever see you in that way..."

"...Dating you would be like dating my little sister..."

"...You're not Lily, alright? You never will be."

You probably looked desperate before the kiss, making him feel like he had to kiss you after you so plainly asked him to. You looked the part now, taking in your reflection in the mirror that blurred from your watering eyes.

You wiped them right away, feeling ridiculous. This whole thing was ridiculous. You weren't going to cry in a bathroom during a party over a kiss; you had that much pride.

You took another second to pull yourself together before leaving the bathroom, fighting through the crowd of people again to find that your friends weren't where you left them, but on the other side of the room by the drinks table.

You made your way over to them, frowning. "What happened to Spin the Bottle?"

Marlene, Mary, and Lily all turned towards you in unison, the latter scanning over you like a worried mother. "Are you alright?"

You nodded quickly, dismissive. "Yeah, I'm fine. What happened to the game?" The three of them shared a look before Mary answered you.

"It kinda died down after you and James left."

You paused, looking between them with a concerned frown and dread that you couldn't hide. "James left?" They nodded. "Where did he go?"

Marlene shrugged. "Don't know." Then, she spotted something from behind you, waving a hand. "Hey, Black!" she snapped, and you turned to see Sirius, Remus, and Peter coming down the steps from the boys' dormitories. Sirius noticed her calling and the three of them came over to where you stood.

"What happened to Potter?" Marlene demanded for you. "Where'd he go?"

At the question, Sirius seemed to pause, glancing to the others briefly.

"He was tired," Remus answered for him. "Wanted to get get good sleep for Quidditch practice or something."

Marlene looked between the three of them skeptically, before nodding. "Right," she drawled, and moved to leave, walking between Sirius and Remus. Lily and Mary followed, but you stayed behind.

"Quidditch practice starts on Monday," you said flatly after they left, staring between the three boys who stood shifty before you.

"He said he doesn't feel like partying anymore," said Peter quickly, and the two others turned to him as if he'd spilled some sort of secret. You frowned, worry and confusion evident in your expression.

"Look," said Sirius with a sober tone. "We don't know for sure why he's went off to bed, but you can probably guess."

You stared at him and his serious expression, and realized with a twinge in your chest that you probably could: He was avoiding you.

"Yeah," you agreed lowly, head tipped downwards—you should've never kissed him. But you knew you couldn't take it back now.

You let your eyes wander from the floor to the table of drinks next to you, figuring that maybe a drink could do you some good.

Taking hold of a cup that was already filled amongst the rows of others, against your better judgement, you tipped your head back and drank from it until your throat burned and the cup felt light in your hands. You heard Peter gasp in surprise.

"Hey, woah," Remus chided, taking the cup from your hands. "I don't need every last one of you hungover tomorrow, yeah?"

You squinted at him, whether from the taste of the alcohol or your annoyance you didn't know. "You've been drinking all bloody night."

Sirius laughed from next to you, taking your cup from Remus and finishing whatever little was left. "Moony has a conceringly high alcholol tolerance." Peter nodded in agreement, Remus shrugging as you glared at him.

"Fine," you said, pressing a hand to your temple. The smell of alcohol mixed with the blaring music and whatever you were feeling right then was giving you a headache, and the quiet of your dorm room was starting to sound a little too appeasing. Plus, you had the feeling your mind wouldn't find peace unless you went to sleep

"Maybe I should just go to bed too." You chewed at the inside of your bottom lip. "Tell James I said goodnight when you see him." You didn't miss the way the three of them glanced around at each other concernedly but nodded anyway. "See you guys in the morning."

You waved goodbye to them and made the walk back towards the girls' dorms, finding Marlene and Lily in the crowd and wishing them goodnight too.

In the time it took you to get ready for bed, you decided that tomorrow you were going to move on—seriously move on—from whatever happened tonight, and the past few nights, and maybe the past few years too. You didn't think you had the mental strength to keep worrying, especially not when you'd been trying to stop your mind from replaying your kiss with James in your head for the last thirty minutes.

You crashed down onto your bed, feeling like you carried the weight of the world on your chest but convincing yourself it was only a feather if only to fall asleep for the night. You might've ruined everything, but at least your bed was comfy.

[swiss-mrs]

#WEIRD☆GIRL

(Word Count: 4.6k)

Rating: PG-13, Adult Language and Themes, All Characters are 18+

Reader/OC Description: Reader/OC is Afro-Latina. She has long, dyed black hair that is worn straight with baby bangs and shaved brows. She is an alt baddie and would've definitely ruled MySpace. Body shape/type is not detailed. No Use of Y/N.

Playlist

Synopsis: One day, while Dave and Todd are out, they pass by a park void of screaming kids. Instead, the park is taken up by a group of what looks to be a mix of teenagers and young adults. Passing by the loud group, the boys can't help but stare, mixing Dave up with a girl more socially unacceptable than him.

Warnings(?): Adult Language, Sexual Themes (No Smut, Just Horny Boy Thoughts), Catcalling (Potentially Triggering Language)

This is written in third person but mainly narrated from Dave's view.

》》》

"I can't believe they had it!" Todd exclaims, gripping the plastic bag in his hand tight. Dave nods, gripping his backpack straps.

"Yeah, we need to start coming here more often. They have everything. We gotta bring Marty with us when he gets back."

Today marked the first day of the boys' last Spring Break. Marty was out of town on a trip to Florida with his family, so this cut down the trio to a duo, Dave and Todd. The two were currently walking along a street on the other side of town than their usual hangout. Todd found a new comic and video game store, and he and Dave figured they'd check it out.

"I can't wait to read it."

"Remember, no spoilers until I pick up my edition too." Dave replied. As they round a corner to get to their bus stop, they are greeted with the sight of a large clearing between buildings.

On the closest side to the boys was a skate park. It had a decent amount of skaters occupying it, echoes of skateboards landing against concrete traveling throughout the park. As the boys walked passed, they could hear the sound of music. The further they walk, the closer the music gets.

The current song that was playing was what Dave imagined rugged bikers with dark sunglasses and handlebar mustaches listened to. Scary and intimidating. It was muddy and grungy and punk and metal? He wasn't well versed enough to really know how to label its genre. Just as one song came to an end, another just like it followed.

He and Todd were both staring at the group surrounding the picnic table that held the speaker. Each one was different from the next, but they all had a similar dark and grungy style.

Something that immediately caught his eye was a black haired girl who took two big steps to get atop the picnic table. As the new song began to pick up, she got into a matching character. As she winded her hips and lip sang to the lyrics, Dave was completely entranced by her. "Woah..."

"Yeah…" Todd absently replies.

Her unnaturally dark hair cascaded down her shoulders and around the curve of her breasts. Her bangs reminded Dave of a toddler who decided to experiment with scissors. They were far too short to be considered "normal", but, Jesus, did she pull them off well.

She had two bows on the sides of her head, one purple and the other an off-white cream color. She wore a black, short sleeve crop top with red writing on it, something Dave couldn't really read clearly from this distance. She had knitted, fingerless gloves on each hand that nearly blended in with her skin tone. Dave's eyes continued to work their way down her legs, finding her thighs covered with light pink, sheer lace shorts that stopped mid thigh. The only thing keeping her "appropriate" were homemade, cut-off jean short shorts.

Dave couldn't help himself; he was captivated. He's never seen anyone dressed like she was, at least not in real life. It was like she stepped right out of an anime. She was incredibly unique. How was she able to pull that off so well?

Dave's eyes wandered down further to get a full view of her exposed, dancing legs. He couldn't help but wonder what it felt like to touch them.

She swiveled her hips in circles as she began to spin and whip her hair to the beat. Dave had this opportunity to move his eyes up, getting a perfect view of her butt, his body lighting up as his heart raced.

She had made a full turn, stopping in the direction of the two boys, catching their stares. Todd immediately turns his head to try and seem captivated by the clouds above, but Dave is not as quick to notice.

"Dave." Todd mumbles, eyes dodging the girl's gaze, darting back and forth from his friend, the ground, and a very (not-so) interesting brick building behind the park. "Dave." Todd repeats, elbowing Dave in the side, finally snapping him out of his hypnosis.

"Ouch!" Dave yelps in surprise, turning to Todd who is looking at him wide eyed, trying to send him a message. Dave looks away from his friend and back to the table dancer. She was staring right at him with squinted eyes. They seem to make eye contact for a solid second before she abruptly lifts a hand to her forehead. She held up her pointer and pinky fingers. The 'rock and roll' symbol she held against her head imitated horns as scrunched her nose, sticking her tongue out like a child. The action shocked Dave, but he couldn't help but find her oddly adorable.

Todd is quick to snatch the handle at the top of Dave's backpack and drag him away to their bus stop at the end of the street. The ride home was a pretty quiet one after that.

》》》

Two weeks have passed since he'd first seen the strange girl. Every spare chance he got during spring break was spent taking advantage of his vigilante skills for the wrong reasons. He had secretly visited that park numerous times, watching his girl and her friend group from afar. He knew that stalking was not how he should've gone about this, but he also didn't see walking straight up to her and introducing himself as an option either.

Something was definitely wrong with him. There is no good reason for him to know where she lives, but he convinced himself it was just to ensure she got home safe. Tonight only enforced that thought.

Usually she would walk home with at least one friend for good measure, but for some unknown reason to Dave, she walked alone.

Today, she had on an extra baggy hoodie. One that he came to know as one of her favorites. It reached the tops of her bare thighs, the hem of her mini skirt just visible below. She wore leg warmers that matched the color of her hoodie and worn combat boots. She had a small backpack that looked like wings on her back, decked out in pins of all kinds. The oversized hood was perched on top of her head.

She was always good about checking her surroundings and looking over her shoulder when walking alone, but this wasn't a matter of a sneak attack.

Dave watched as an older man stepped out in front of his strange girl. Dave couldn't hear the exact dialog due to their distance and the passing people and cars, but he for sure knew that whatever was being said was not welcomed.

"No. Thank you. I'd rather be left alone." Dave heard that loud and clear, so why did this creepy guy not take the hint and leave?

The man abruptly reached for her arm, and gripped it tight. Dave took off in a sprint.

"Get your hands off me, asshole!"

"Don't be a fucking tease-"

"Hey!" Dave cut the guy off, running up behind her. "Didn't you hear what she said, creep? Let her go!" He said firmly. Both the creepy guy and the girl's eyes look over to Dave, both of them giving him a once over. Her eyes were full of confusion, one thinly drawn brow raised. The man scoffed at the kid.

"What the fuck is this?" he shoots back. Dave squares his shoulders and raises his masked chin. "How about you mind your fucking business, princess, before you get hurt." the man follows up, making fun of Dave's costume.

"Let. Her. Go." Dave repeats sternly. The guy laughs in his face.

"Or what, leotard?" Dave follows up by removing the batons from behind his back. He points one at the man.

"Or else I'll have to beat you until you let go?" He says confidently. The girl cringes, that was not nearly as intimidating as he thought it was. The guy laughs again, flicking out a pocket knife. The two men stood there in a stare down. Their pause gave the girl a chance to yank her arm from the man's grasp, simultaneously using her other hand to whip out a pink taser decorated like a mini Gameboy. She shoves the sparked end into the side of the creep's neck, causing him to twitch and spasm. She holds it there until the man falls to the ground twitching, presumably unconscious. She takes her booted foot and jumps into a hard kick to the man's side.

"Fuck you, dipass!" Dave stands there shocked. The girl's gaze switches to face him. He lifts his hands in surrender and slowly puts his batons back. The girl takes one big step closer to Dave. He jumps back, but she is quick to grab one of his hands and begin dragging him down the route of towards her apartment.

They walk a couple blocks and round a corner in silence before she stops abruptly and turns to Dave. He stands there staring, absolutely shell shocked. "Who are you and what do you think you're doing!?" She asks, putting two hands on her hips and resting her weight on one side.

"Uh-" Dave stutters. The girl raises her brows expectantly. "I, uh- I was trying to help you." The girl's brows draw together as she squints.

"Thank you, but, to be honest, you didn't really do much, and that only answered one of my questions."

"Uh, I'm, uh- The name's KickAss." The girl stares at him in disbelief for a good five seconds, searching his eyes for any sense of a joke.

When she doesn't find anything, she lets out a "pfft" and giggles. "You're joking, right?" She raises her brows with a grin.

"Uh, no. I'm not…" Dave's eyes look everywhere but at her.

"I-," giggle, "I'm sorry." Another giggle, " I don't mean to be rude, but KickAss?" Dave smiles nervously, instinctual reaching for the back of his head. "You really need a rebranding, my guy." She says, an amused smile still playing on her lips. Her eyes didn't hold any malice or judgement, just intrigue.

"Yeah, well, I'm obviously not that creative." He laughs nervously. Dave looks back to her, finally getting a proper look at her up close. She's smiling… at him. God, he was going to faint.

"Jesus, your eyes." She says suddenly, catching Dave off guard. "They're gorgeous, my god." She huffs a short laugh, staring into his eyes. Dave can't keep eye contact for long, completely flustered. He thanked the powers that be that he had a mask on at this very moment. He was sure he was as red as ever.

"Thank you." He looks down. "You, uh, your eyes are beautiful, too." He says sheepishly. She laughs, shaking her head.

"Oh, please. They're just a normal, old brown. Nothing compared to your stunners. Wow." She throws back at him. "Well, I appreciate you stepping in, KickAss." She thanks, putting emphasis on his 'name'.

"No problem. You seem to have it handled without me." His illusion of 'stalking for protection' ruined.

"Nonsense! Thankfully, I didn't need you to start a fight this time. The fact that you even stepped in at all when you saw something means a lot, so thank you." She clasps her hands in front of her, swaying side to side.

"Can I walk you the rest of the way?" He asks. She shakes her head.

"As sweet as that is, no, thank you. I don't quite know how I feel about masked men knowing where I live." She teases. "Plus, it's not much further. I'll be okay." She smiles at him, again. Dave can't decide if he wishes she'd stop looking at him or if he wishes she'd keep her gaze on him forever. She begins walking away, "Thanks, again! See you around!" She shouts behind her, turning another corner.

》》》

Two months have passed. Shortly after their first, up close, encounter, Dave made it a point to walk her home every chance he got, always when she was alone. Well, not every time. She started to get suspicious as to how he always knew when she was walking alone. "Are you following me?" She'd ask, Dave giving an unconvincing 'pfft' and a 'no', causing her to roll her eyes. After that, he made sure to space out their walks but still following her from a distance. It's now nearing the end of June, and his graduation date is only a couple weeks out.

This night was a first. She invited Dave in. His eyes widened in shock, "Yeah, sure!" He said a little too enthusiastically, internally cringing at himself, but his awkwardness only caused her to giggle.

She nods, "Okay. My brother is home, so you'll have to sneak in. I'll go in first. Just turn the corner," she points, "and use the fire escape ladder to get to the fourth window up. My window has a collection of ninja turtle action figures on the sill." Dave opens his mouth to say something, but she continues, "Wait there until I come in. I just have to let my brother know I'm home first, then I can disappear into my room." Dave sits his mouth and nods. "Okay, I'll see you up there!" She smiles, jogging into the building.

Dave watches her jog up the stairs until he can't see her anymore. He then makes his way around the building and, as instructed, climbs up the fire escape. He gets to her window with ease. Through the parted curtains, he could see into her dark room. The light in the hallway provided little to illuminate the room from the bottom of the closed door, but thanks to the setting sun, Dave could clearly see the four little trinkets on her windowsill. It made him smile. She was a little nerdy, too.

"Ok, I'll order the pizza!" Before Dave could analyze her room any further, she bursts through the door, tossing her bag on the floor. She turns, closing and locking the door before running up to the window. She throws the curtains open and slides up the window, smiling brightly at him. "Hola."

"Buenas Noches, señorita." Dave says, again cringing at his choice of words, getting a laugh out of her.

"Vamos." She says, stepping aside. He climbs through the window, trying his best to avoid disrupting the figures. "You up for pizza?" She asks once he's fully inside.

Dave nods, looking around at her room. "Yeah, sure."

She smiles up at him, gesturing to her room, "Bienvenido a mi casa." She says dramatically. "Make yourself at home, señor KickAss."

Dave chuckles at her, shaking his head. "Gracias." His accent is still strongly American, but four years of Spanish didn't make it the worst. He goes to sit on the plush bench at the end of her bed. He figured that was a safe bet. He wasn't on her bed, but he also wasn't awkwardly sitting at her desk in the corner of the room. It was a kind of middle ground. His eyes follow her as she goes over to her old school boombox, graffitied with stickers, and turns on some music, low enough for them to hear each other, but just loud enough to disguise their voices from any eavesdropping. "Do I need to worry about your brother?" He asks playfully, deep down a little nervous.

"No, he's playing video games with our cousins online. He can't hear a thing with his-"

"AHHH! NO MAMES WEY!" a scream can be heard, as if on queue, scaring the fuck out of Dave.

She rolls her eyes, continuing, "headphones on." She sits on her bed, crawling over to rest her bare legs on the empty cushion next to Dave. She grabs her laptop that was laying on the bed and opens it up. "What kind of pizza do you like?" She asks, typing away.

"Uh, whatever." He says, unsure.

"Well, guess we can't go wrong with half pepperoni and half cheese." She says, placing the order. "My brother is pretty boring when it comes to pizza." Another scream could be heard in the background, promoting another eyeroll. Dave chuckles a little, nodding.

He twiddles his thumbs before asking, "So, why did you invite me in?" The girl shrugs her shoulders, still typing and clicking away.

"I dunno. You've walked me home nearly everyday for the passed 2 months, and I've grown to trust you. Every time we part ways, I feel the urge to keep you around. I figured it was about time we hung out for more than just a few blocks." She closes her laptop hallway and sets it to the side. His heart flutters.

Dave looks at her stunned. "You want to hang out with me?" The girl squints at him.

"Um, yeeaaah. What kind of question is that?"

"I, uh- I mean- it's just- you know-..." He stutters. She giggles at him.

"What?"

"I mean, you're just so cool, and I'm, you know-"

She looks at him amused. "You're what? A cool vigilante guy who is sweet and funny and someone who should totally should give himself more credit." She bends her legs, nudging him softly with her knee. She scoots down the bed a little to sit closer to Dave, holding her knees to her chest. She uses her oversized sweatshirt to encompass her entire body. Dave looks at her with admiration, his heart racing again, before looking away from her and down at the bench below him. "I don't hear a 'Gracias' or a 'Tienes razón, mi hermosa. Eres muy inteligente y eres la mujer más bella del mundo. Gracias por todo, mi amor.'" She goes on.

Dave laughs, "Thank you. I don't know if you're right, but you are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." Dave says boldly but still avoiding eye contact, looking down at his hands.

The girl's eyes widen, "You speak Spanish?" She looks horrified, embarrassed by the words of praise she tried to get him to say.

"A little." He twiddles his thumbs more, "I've been taking Spanish all throughout high school. I am no expert, but I can get around." He shrugs.

"Welp, that's embarrassing." the girl reaches up to tug hard on the strings of her hoodie, hiding her face in the fabric. Dave looks up and reaches for her hands.

"Que? No 'gracias'?" He teases, trying to get a look at her face. He has no clue what is coming over him, but he is becoming a bit more comfortable. His heart is still pounding, but seeing her get flustered brought his confidence up. She peers out from inside her hoodie. Her wide eyed look nearly floored him. He was forever grateful that he was already seated or else his knees would have buckled.

"Gracias,... señor KickAss." She says playfully, trying to make up for her embarrassment by joking off. He offers her a soft smile, melting her. It was now her turn to avoid his eyes. Her eyes make their way over to the stereo. "So… you're still in high school?" She asks, looking back to him, wearily.

He nods, "Y-Yeah, but not for long." He says quickly, the realization coming quick that they don't actually know each other's ages. "I graduate in like 2 weeks." Her nonexistent brows raise as she nods. "Are you?"

She shakes her head, "No, I tested out, got my diploma early. I couldn't be bothered with high school anymore." She shrugged. Dave's brows shot up. She really was smart. "It's just me and my brother. The earlier I got out of high school, the more time I had. It allowed me to help out with bills and whatever, get us a nicer place." She gestures to the room around her. "I mean, it may not seem like much, but trust me when I say it's a million times better than where we were." She then takes the time to look around and appreciate her surroundings.

Dave's look of admiration returns. "You're amazing." He blurts out. The girl's eyes find him, holding his eye contact, again with this wide eyed stare. She was gonna kill him. Her heart stopped when she looked in his eyes and found nothing but honesty and softness. She gives him a little smile. My god, Dave was literally going to pass out.

》》》

Dave didn't seem to notice, but hours went by with them talking, eating pizza, and talking some more. It was now pitch black outside, and the only light in the room was coming from her bedside lamps and a flickering candle.

By now, both of them had made their way into the bed. Dave was laying on his back, watching the ceiling while she was laying on her stomach perched up on her elbow, watching him. They were currently both comfortably silent, the soft music still playing in the background. She guessed that her brother must have fallen asleep at his console by now, considering there weren't any more frustrating cries or exciting cheers heard from across the apartment. Dave is the first to interrupt the silence between them. "Would it be a terrible idea to take my mask off right now?"

The girl gasps dramatically, placing a hand on her chest, "and reveal your secret identity, Zorro?" She lets out a short laugh, this causes Dave to let out a tired smile.

"I'm being serious." There's a pause.

"Well…" the girl starts, "you know, once you do so, there's no going back. I'm not so much of a bitch that I'd ever expose you, but you know… it's a big step."

"Is it in the right direction?" he asks, turning his head to look over at her. They stare deeply into each other's eyes.

She sighs, "I'm sorry, babe, but that's a decision you'll have to make on your own." The pet name catches Dave off guard. He nods and sits up, causing the girl next to him to follow suit, twisting her body so she's cross crossed and facing him. Dave takes a deep breath and reaches for the back of his mask. Just as his gloved hands meet the fabric, he felt a smaller hand touch his. "Are you sure?... Absolutely positive?"

He doesn't move, "Positive." He replies. She lefts go of his hand and he pulls the mask forward and off his head. He kept his head down for a second, taking in a deep breath. He could feel her eyes staring at the side of his head.

He looks up and turns to her. They make eye contact for a good 3 second before her sleeve covered hands come flying up to her face, covering her eyes. "Oh my god!"

"Oh my god, what?!" Dave panics.

"You're hot!" She exclaims. Wow, did she really know how to throw Dave off. He watches her, shocked. "This feels wrong, oh my god!" She says, muffled by her sleeves. "I should not be seeing this right now." Dave smiles a little. How does she do this? She's just too cute.

He reaches up for her hands, "Well, like you said, there's no going back, babe." He says, pulling her hands down. Her eyes were squeezed shut, scrunching up her face in what Dave thought was the most adorable way. "Oh, don't be a baby. Open your eyes." He says. She squeezes them even harder just before opening them up, like ripping off a bandaid.

She lets out a sigh as her eyes roam over every feature. She takes a moment to just admire his face before giggling when her eyes make their way to his hair. "What?" Dave asked, this time not panicked, but amused.

She giggles some more, smiling wide. "Your hair is a mess." She says finally, biting her smile.

He rolls his eyes, "Yeah, I don't really do face reveals, so I didn't bother thinking of a way to properly tie my hair up under the mask."

She smiles at him softly, her eyes relaxed. She reaches up to touch his cheek. It's warm and a little sweaty from being stuck under a mask for the last several hours. They get lost in each other's eyes. Dave's jaw was slack, lips parted slightly. Her features still held her soft smile.

"I think I love you." Dave says abruptly, taking her aback.

"What?-"

"I just always feel so safe and comfortable around you, and I love how you're so unapologetically yourself, and you are always so kind and beautiful, and I can't help but find myself always thinking about you, and I'm always wondering if you're thinking about me to, which I hope you do, because I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I wasn't on your mind the way you're on mine, and ever since I saw you dancing on that picnic table when Todd and I were walking to the bus stop and you made that weird adorable little devil horn face thing, I knew I just had to know you, like I was drawn to you, and-"

"Wait, that was you?"

Dave ignores get question and continues rambling, "and I know we're just kids, but I can't think of a better way to live life than with you, and I want us to be together. I want to go to see your favorite scary movies with you, even though it confuses me as to why you still go to them when you say they always scar you, and I want to hold your hand and be there for you when you're scared. I want to go see those bands you always talk about in concert with you. I want to learn every lyric to every one of your favorite songs just to impress you when they come on. I want to hold you at night when you've had a bad day and don't know what to do with yourself. I want to keep you safe and always make sure you're happy. I want to be the reason you smile. I want to walk with you forever, stay by your side. I want to fall asleep beside you every night and wake up to you every morning, and I want nothing more than to hear you say you love me and tell me you love me the same way I love you, and I-"

"Dave, shut up!" She says with a smile, her eyes glistening. "Breathe." They both take a deep breath together. "If you keep going, you'll turn blue." They share a small laugh. "Can I kiss you?" She asks.

Without responding, Dave dives forward and kisses her full force. They deepen the kiss, her other hand reaching up to caress his other cheek, his hands resting on the bed, one on each side of her knees.

Without breaking the kiss, Dave moves to readjust. He pulls her closer, moving her to sit in his lap. She follows his lead, getting up to straddle him. Dave wraps his arms around her waist, hugging her closer to him. She arches her back, "accidentally" grinding against him. Dave is first to break the kiss with a gasp, his hands immediately making their way to her hips. She opens her eyes to find Dave's squeezed shut with his eyebrows narrowed together. His blue eyes open to meet hers after a second, both of them breathing heavily, Dave's eyes wide and innocent, looking up at her.

"Sorry." He says, embarrassed that she was able to affect him so easily. She grins, shaking her head.

"Don't be sorry. It's good to know I have such an effect on you." She leans down to rest her forehead on his. She squishes his check together, pushing him down to the bed, his hands finding themselves caressing her now exposed butt from under the mini skirt she still wore. He felt all the blood drain from his head downward. "Should we keep going?" She asks. Dave nods furiously, no longer able to form words.

She leans in slowly to plant a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you, too."

》》》

Moodboard (exposing "y/n") on my page under #weird girl swiss fic