#a way that no other shows have problems. and that NOTHING about it worked at ALL and that it was ALL stupid and we should
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į„«į”. THATāS MY SISTER YOU BITCH
Summary: Despite Sarah and Rafeās volatile relationship, thatās your sister.
Warnings: Violence, illusions to sex, swearing.
You had a great day so far. You'd woken up to Rafe in between your legs, waking you up in the best way possible before he made you both breakfast as you watched him from the island. Sometimes you just liked to ponder on how lucky you were to have a boyfriend like Rafe. To everyone else, you were far from lucky but you liked it that way- knowing only you got the real Rafe Cameron.
Now, you were on your way back from grocery shopping, planning to make Rafe a romantic meal when he arrived back from work. Blasting music from your car speakers, you were completely in the zone. Until you drove up to the City Hall, glancing ahead you saw Kelce's red truck, which you thought nothing of until you saw him and his idiotic friends surrounding John B and Sarah.
Alarmed, you pulled up next to the truck, gathering the attention of everyone. Despite being a kook yourself, you were far different from the rest of them. You didn't care about pogues, to you they were like anyone else, in fact often you preferred the pogues in the Outer Banks to the kooks. Rafe's circle exclusively consisted of kooks, meaning you often received a lot of respect from kooks even though you spent a lot of your time arguing with them. Rafe didn't mind it, you were his girlfriend and lover, so if you wanted to yell he wouldn't stop you.
"Problem?" You asked, slamming your car door shut behind you. Just as Sarah hit the ground. Immediately you rushed towards Sarah. Yeah, Rafe and Sarah had problems they needed to get past but to you, Sarah was still as important as she was 2 years ago. You were proud of her for finding her true love and true friends, and you always let her know that you would always be there for her. And this time was no exception. Putting two and two together, you saw Ruthie standing much closer to Sarah than the other kooks who looked at her in shock.
They all stood stunned at your arrival, to be honest, you were probably the worst possible person to show up at that exact moment. Everyone knew your opinions on the Pogues were far more empathetic than the other kooks. "No, no problem" Kelce muttered, beginning to pull Ruthie and the others back from Sarah and John B, to which they happily obliged. Not on your watch.
"Oh no, don't stop on my accord guys. Please whatever you were going to do next. Do it." Walking over to them, Ruthie stood stunned at your arrival. Since she started dating Topper, you got a lot of joy out of berating her, publically. For once, she didn't back down at your words. "She needs to watch herself. She pushed me first, it was self-defence." Ruthie said, glancing behind you to see John B pulling Sarah to her feet.
Snorting you replied, "Ruthie, I'm not Shoupe. Don't start pleading your case, I don't care." She stalled at your response, for a moment thinking that you were on her side for pushing Sarah before you pulled her back to reality. Walking closer to her, edgingly slow, you pressed, "You think you're all big and mighty for pushing Sarah? She's 19 Ruthie, you're what? 21? Don't you think you should play with someone your own size?"
Behind you, John B and Sarah smirked at the group. Unbeknownst to you, Sarah was pregnant and John B was far too occupied to make sure Sarah was okay than to pick a fight with Kelce and his goons today. But you happily would, and even better so because who was going to fight back against the kook princess? Definitely not these ones.
āWell?ā You pushed, as you stood toe to toe with Ruthie. You were growing impatient, Rafe would have finished work by now meaning that soon heād come looking for you- and youād rather give Ruthie a good couple punches before Rafe showed up.
āOkay times up.ā Before she could even think, your fist sent her backwards onto the floor, just how Sarah had been when when you arrived. Groaning, she lifted her hands to cover her nose, assumably bleeding- hopefully broken if Rafeās self defence lessons had done some good. āOh my god- I think you broke my nose. You bitch.ā She shrieked, pulling her hands away to reveal blood beginning to pour from her nose.
Ruthie was nothing but a bully, a bully youād had enough of tormenting the island. Your legs either side of her chest you crouched over her, āDonāt worry you still look just as bad as before.ā You muttered as you flew your fist back into her face that she left unguarded. Idiot. Her screaming began again, as you moved off from her, deciding that your two punches had done enough damage. Wow, youād really have to thank Rafe for those lessons.
āJust wait until Topper hears about this, he will deal with you.ā One of the other kooks muttered from behind Kelce. āYeah Iām sure Topper will be sure to deal with me.ā You laughed, Topper wouldnāt touch a hair on your arm as long as you were dating Rafe- everyone knew that.
āYou want to fuck with someone, not Sarah.ā You spat at them, watching Ruthie sadly pull herself to her feet, with the help of no one. āThatās my sister you bitch. Now fuck off.ā At your command, Kelce briskly walked back over to his truck, as the others followed just as fast, allowing you to turn back to John B and Sarah.
You were greeted to their smiling faces, both as grateful as each other. But you noticed, a twinge of emotion still lingering on Sarahās face. Hearing you call her your sister in combination with her pregnancy hormones, was due to set her off to cry. Before she could get out any words, you spoke for her. āYou are my sister regardless of whatever is going on between you and Rafe. Youāre family.ā Turning to John B, you continued, āThat extends to you, hubby.ā You winked looking down at the ring on his finger.
With a red blush covering their faces, they praised you in thank yous. āDonāt need to thank me for doing something Iāve been wanting to do for months.ā Glancing back to see the red truck had disappeared.
āNow, you can thank me for warning you that Rafe will be here any minute and Iām not sure you want to see him.ā
āāāāāāāāā
āBaby, please be more careful next time.ā Rafe muttered, as he wrapped your knuckles in bandages. He was more than shocked to find you outside the city hall- alone- but with bloody knuckles. Only with the explanation, that you had an altercation with Ruthie, surprisingly over Sarah. He was confused to say the least, he wasnāt even aware that Ruthie had a problem with his little sister. But the more he thought about it, of course she did- Topper still hadnāt gotten over her.
āIn fact, there will be no next time. Ever.ā Kissing your knuckles, he pulled you onto his chest as he lied back on your shared king bed. Stroking your hair, he let his mind wonder. Should he have been there to protect Sarah? But they hadnāt had a good relationship in years, he couldnāt just suddenly start caring for her. He also couldnāt let you get into situations that could get you hurt over protecting Sarah.
You noticed his body still and you knew instantly his mind was wondering thinking about Sarah. Without moving your head from his chest you spoke, āRafe. I love Sarah. I know you have a difficult relationship at the moment and whilst you canāt protect her I will.ā Letting the silence sit between you for a moment, you decided to continue.
āSheās our only family, Rafe.ā He didnāt move, but you both knew how right you were. She was all you had left. āI know baby, I know.ā He whispered, laying a kiss on the top of your head, before he let his mind slip back into imagining how he can rectify this broken relationship with his sister.
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe obx#rafe outer banks#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#outer banks#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe fanfiction#rafe x you#rafe cameron x female reader
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AAAAJAJA I LOVE UOURR BLOGGG AND HOW YOU ENVISION EACH CHARACTERS XDD may I pretty please make a request for angst/fluff hcs on female human reader, whoās very insecure, paired with the upper moon trio and Muzan?Whether itās about her looks, or that she feels like they donāt genuinely love her (esp since they are demons and sheās a human, so whatās stopping them from leaving/killing her and dating other demons instead(ĖĢ£Ģ£Ģ£Ģ£ļøæĖĢ£Ģ£Ģ£Ģ£ )
Insecurity
What stops your demon s/o to get bored of you one day and eat you? What if theyāre only pretending to love you? And what will your partner do to fight those insecurities?
Pairing: Kokushibo, Douma, Akaza, Muzan x gn!reader
Kokushibo
He is taking your insecurities very seriously. Kokushibo knows and felt it himself plenty, during both his demon and human years. Despite that, his ācomfortā and āreassuranceā methods are quite unique. Your husband will not react immediately to your feelings, rather being more quiet and reserved than usual, wich at first makes you doubt yourself even more. Perhaps he is finally realising that he is much better off with another human or even demonā¦ Although you started to notice how Kokushibo was hovering around you more and more. Silently, but he was still there, watching you while you go on with your day. You could be doing some mundane task like cooking yourself a meal and he would be standing behind you, not noticing how intimidating he is being right now.
In his mind, Kokushibo was showing more interest in you. He believed that you felt insecure about him not being around you enough or paying attention to you, instead being out on missions or training. So, now heās watching you everyday all day, trying to show you through his ways that he cares about you and cherishes you very much. Once he finally notices how he is achieving nothing but making you confused or intimidating, Kokushibo begins to show affection more openly, although it felt forced at first.
His calloused hand would slowly slip into yours, intertwining fingers while he was meditating, or him holding you close to his body while you napped or slept on his chest, spending the precious and scarce nighttime with showering you in affection while you were resting, not even aware about how he was trying to show his love in his own way.
āIāll stay for the night, I asked that man to give the other Upper Moons any of my remaining missions. Iād rather spend my time with you.ā
Kokushibo is silently worrying about not being good enough for you. Although he is Upper Moon One, wouldnāt a human want to marry another human and start a family? What stops you from leaving him? He will not stop or hurt you when you choose to do so, he would completely understand.
Douma
You immediately saw Doumaās face shift into the expression he gives to all his followers once they start speaking about their woes, while you were trying to explain to him how you were feeling. You silenced yourself the second the pity-tinged smile appeared on your face, knowing that he is not listening or acknowledging your feelings in any way. He told you times before how he feels exhausted when listening to his followers whine and cry about their problems while Douma barely cares, giving them the usual advice. Talking about your insecurities will definitely not work with Douma, so youāll have to resort to other things to make him listen. Ignoring him is a not very nice way to do it, but at least heāll start to wonder why you are not around.
He notices immediately when you stop being near him. Youāre not sitting by his side during sermons, youāre not in your shared bedroom and the followers commented about how you were seemingly avoiding the Founder. Thatās when it finally clicks, you were talking about not feeling enough for him and being insecure about yourself earlier, right? Once Douma chased you down (and persuaded you to leave the garden and step into the shade with him so you two can have a conversation without him needing to yell all over the estate), he theatrically kissed the palm of your hand and kept apologising over and over, almost nervously trying to explain how much he loves you and how irreplaceable you truly are to him and his heart.
You are the first human, first being he felt emotions for. Happiness, sadness, anger, jealousy and most importantly loveā all the beautiful and unpleasant feelings, Douma began feeling them because of you!
To prove his point in a way, he introduced you to all the unimpressed Upper Moons and his master as āthe love of his lifeā, his wife, his life partner, soulmate and so on and on, mentioning many other petnames until Muzan finally silenced him. Douma invites you to sit right beside him during sermons, instead of having your own cushion, keeping you closer and having the opportunity to openly shower you in affection. He sometimes sends out followers to pick up flowers for you in the garden and then presents then to you as if he picked them out himself, acting like the sun wasnāt out for the last hours, making it not possible for him to get those flowers for you. You appreciate it nonetheless.
āI have an idea! How about we hold an official wedding ceremony with all my followers! We cab invite my other friends too! Ohh, Akaza can be my best man, imagine how that could be, haha!ā
Even if Douma is rather comical and theatrical, deep down inside, he is rather afraid of you getting sick of him one day. He knows he can keep his followers charmed and close, but his speeches and charms do not work on you. You see right through him and know the true person, or demon, he is. He is insecure himself because why would you stay with a man-eating demon? Once you mentioned your own thoughts and feelings, he took it as an opportunity to prove that he does cherishes and loves you so, so incredibly much.
Akaza
Youā¦ You seriously think that you are not good enough? Not pretty or strong enough? Seriously?
You are the best thing that ever happened and will happen to him. You are patient with him snd so kind, so gentle and affectionate. You heal his soul and now you are talking about being replaceable? He feels incredibly horrible for making you feel so terrible about yourself.
Akaza tries to be more obvious about his feelings for you, trying to reassure you how beautiful you look or saying āI love youā more often, taking your smaller hand into his, nuzzling his cheek in your warm palm. He gets much more touchy, trying to get you to cuddle more and more so he can relish in your warmth and bask in your arms. His time with you is scarce, especially with how Muzan keeps drowning him in more and more exhausting missions that keep him away from you (and sometimes it feels like his master is doing it on purpose), thatās why his eyes do not leave your form for even one second, sometimes quietly mumbling āI love youā against your warm skin, his lips placing kisses between his muffled words.
āThereās no one else I want by my side, bunny. You make me feel warm, fuzzyā¦ safe, yāknow. Itās weird but nice. You should feel like that too.. you deserve it.ā
Akaza sometimes notices how disgustingly desperate he sounds to comfort and reassure you. It made him cringe once he realised how hard he fell for you, how much he clung onto you and how desperately he craved your love, your touch. Once you start talking about your insecurities about your beauty, self-worth and so on, he realises how much he appreciates you more and more. Youāre the most beautiful human he ever came across, youāre heaven-sent. Is it selfish of him to think of you as a blessing from the gods themselves?
Muzan Kibutsuji
He was very perplexed when he first listened to you talking about being insecure, not quite understanding how you out of all people feel replaceable and not enough for the demon king. How could you think such things? Do you not understand how vulnerable he is with you without an audience? At first, heād dismiss your worries for you just being confused or not feeling well, but a little after a day after your initial conversation, the gears inside his five brains begin to shift and work again. At that moment, he finally realised what you really meant.
Muzan didnāt want to be more affectionate with you, mistaking love with weakness, but after finally realising how you needed the reassurance from him, he begrudgingly gave into his fears of appearing soft and began to show his love more openly.
The demon king began to shower you in various gifts that mark you as his partner, such as a necklace with a ruby matching his eye colour, multiple rings he owns himself so you two can match and an artificial flower crown for you to wear as his soulmate and in a cute way to show off your āroyal statusā as the partner of Muzan.
āYou are the one and only for me, and I am the only one for you. If the gods exist, they have blessed me with merely meeting you in your lifetimeā¦ it would be a pity to let it expire so soon. I will happily give you my blood if youād like, my sun.ā
š
I am back with the Upper Moons, I hope you donāt mind if I changed the female reader to gn, anon! I felt like I wrote a lot of fem reader lately so I wanted to switch it up again. I wonder if itās obvious wich demon is my favourite XD Anywaysā Iām heading to bed now, I an exhausted :,)
Make sure to EAT, SLEEP and DRINK enough!!
Take care of yourselves <33
#š house of vry š #kokushibo x reader#douma x reader#akaza x reader#muzan x reader#kibutsuji muzan x reader#kokushibo x y/n#kokushibo x you#demon slayer kokushibo#kny kokushibo#kokushibou x reader#kokushibou#douma x y/n#douma x you#douma kny#demon slayer douma#kimetsu no yaiba douma#kny douma#douma#akaza kny#akaza x y/n#demon slayer akaza#kny akaza#akaza kimetsu no yaiba#muzan x y/n#demon slayer x reader#kny x reader#demon slayer muzan#kimetsu no yaiba muzan#kny muzan
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Benās Big BL Blurb 2: Fall is Finally Here
I am simply too busy with worth, family, other hobbies, and life to write about every show in real time anymore. Iām sorry to all the Stray Thoughts readers whoāve reached out about whether I would pick that back up, and I simply just do not have the time to do them anymore. Instead, Iāll try to do one of these as often as I can to catch up on things.
First, letās go over some shows I finished recently that I donāt think I wrote much about.
First Note of Love
I was so happy to see Michael back on screen, and I was glad to see that heās still able to get great chemistry with his co-star. Unfortunately, I donāt think this show was very coherent, so I didnāt get a lot out of it emotionally. It was a pretty inoffensive watch overall, and thus an easy show to put on without having to work through too much. I liked the work between everyone, and Mei Lei was such a fun character. Probably wonāt return to this one, though.Ā
Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo
This is probably the show of the year for me. Thereās so much I loved about this show. I loved that the characters had sex, but were neither rewarded nor punished for it; their sex didnāt solve any problems. I also really love how this show explored how childhood trauma expresses in two different kinds of boys, and I love that we got to see a bully reckon with his actions and get closure. I love that this show ended with them being kinda poor, but happy together. I love how messed up they both were about everything. I loved that Juyeong wasnāt stupid, and could read what was going on.
I clearly need to write a separate post to unpack everything I felt in this show.
Letās move on to what Iām watching currently, in no particular orderā¦starting with the lesbians, and then the worst BLs.
Apple My Love
Genuinely having fun with this GL. I like how quickly most of the drama plays out. Itās giving me quite a bit of secondhand embarrassment, but I like the characterizations in this show. This new production house brought us Knock Knock, Boys! and Monster Next Door this year. We need to keep an eyes on them.Ā
Haunted Hearts
Iām so fascinated by Oxin Films teaming up with Regal Entertainment. The leads are very attractive, but the cinematography is really boring. Iām trying to stay invested, but itās kind of a sleepy watch. Also amused that they started airing a ghost romance right after Halloween ended. Iāve kind of moved on emotionally from the season.
My Damn Business
This show could be good, but itās not. I struggled with episode 5 because our lead looked more relaxed and happier with his senior than the guy heās getting into a romance with. Thereās something missing here in this one, but I canāt exactly put my finger on it. I think itās primarily a side effect of the short run time, but I think the bossās interest isnāt landing properly for the employee to respond to.Ā
Eccentric Romance
This show could be good, but itās not. Still, I am obsessed with a murder mystery being the primary source of confusion between our leads. I was willing to forgive this show a lot of its rough edges, but it failed to handle the turn from friendship to sexual/romance really well. I feel like our guys just started dating and having sex, and Iām a bit frustrated that they didnāt talk about it really at all, particularly since this show features two different languages spoken on screen. Genuinely looking forward to seeing how this one finishes.Ā
See Your Love
Iām not sure this show is exactly working that well, but everyone is very pretty and Iām having a decent time watching it. I like the way Shao Peng stands up for himself, and I like that nothing thatās happened has been totally unbelievable or unreasonable (at least with the mains). Iāll be curious how the hard of hearing and deaf viewers respond to this one once itās complete.Ā
Love is Like a Poison
This show is actually so funny. I love that Shiba is in his own lawyer genre separate from everyone else, and I really like how the two of these guys have become a team. Iām curious how they manage to resolve the scamming next week, but this has been the most unexpected dynamic of the year.Ā
Love in the Air: Koi no Yukon
MAME won this year, yāall. We all have complicated feelings about her, but sheās secured a loving adaptation from a Japanese team thatās put solid effort into bringing her characters to life. Every character feels correct compared to their Thai counterpart we saw on screen, and thatās a strong sign that the writing behind MAMEās work is strong, even if we all have issues with the way she tackles certain themes. Iām really impressed with this adaptation, and really like this version of Rain.I also feel like this show is doing a better job blending the forthcoming couple focus shift.
Our Youth
We just got this show, but damn does it feel sharp! Iām always going to be a sucker for a cinephile character, and Iām so compelled by the way Minase is drawn to Hirukawa. The scene in episode 2 where Minase has to leave Hirukawaās house might be one of the most impressive sequences weāve had in a while, requiring a great deal of choreography and effort from the actors and the camera crew to pull off, and Iām excited to see how these characters split and then come back together.Ā
Smells Like Green Spirit
Let me just say that I need another Abe Alan appearance when he isnāt playing a character doing horrible things to his students. Iāve enjoyed meditating on the 90s with this show and what that era felt like. Iāve liked how the show has tried to focus on how different parents (especially the moms) have responded to their kids coming to terms with themselves. Iāve also really enjoyed the friendship thatās grown between Mishima and Kirino. Iām struggling with Yumeno a lot, because Iām really not a friend of bully romances. Still, I feel like this is one of those shows Iāll remember for a long time because of its focus on the 90s.Ā
Blue Canvas of Youthful Days
I think @lurkingshan covered reactions to episode 5 and episode 6 better than I could, and I loved @twig-tea giving context for the film history moment in episode 6. I remember screaming into the chat for friends to show up for this when I got to that moment. This show has two great pairs of dynamics going on that mirror well. Itās got such a strong handle on its charactersā motivations and how they would respond to the actions from each other. Itās probably the tightest thing Iām watching now, backed by extremely dialed-in performances. I will be thinking about Qi Lu organizing his potential first kiss with Qin Xiao, and how unapologetic heās been about the entire affair. Heās being selfish here, but I kinda like it. Iām so thankful that we are somehow still getting this show, because goddamn do the Chinese actors deliver on chemistry sometimes.
Interview With the Vampire Season 2
I finished this with a friend last week, and holy fuck is this show still so, so good. We watch a lot of gay romance because of BL, and I am having so much fun watching the show about gay divorce. I loved the time we spent in Paris, Danielās shifting role in the narrative, and the new insights we got into Lestat this season. I will miss Claudia so much, and I have to give a standing ovation to Delainey Hayles stepping into the role of Claudia and doing the damn thing this season. I just love seeing my little fucked up gay people torment each other on screen.
I'm still thinking about Louis and Lestat reuniting in a hurricane after Claudia derided this as yet another chapter in their stormy romance.
Dropped Shows
Unfortunately, everyone canāt win. Some of these shows are just too long for me to keep up with them, and oftentimes I get bored. Iāve currently dropped:
Lovesick 2024 - I may go back. Weāll see
Jack & Joker - Itās just too long, and they just killed Jennie and a kid. Iām good.
Fourever You - Iām bored with Earth always playing this character type.
Pluto - Namtam and Film are beautiful, but this looks too messy right now.
Every You, Every Me - Wasnāt intrigued after episode 1, but the commentary may draw me back.
Kidnap - Ohm is not enough to keep me invested in this show.Ā
Uncle Unknown - How did they make a 6 minute show feel slow?
Iām genuinely not trying to be harsh to Thai shows out here, but I just do not have the time to keep up with all of them when theyāre this long and dragging.
Thanks for stopping by, and let me know if thereās something I missed that I should check out.
#Ben watches#first note of love#let free the curse of taekwondo#apple my love#haunted hearts#my damn business#eccentric romance#see your love#love is like a poison#doku koi: doku mo sugireba koi to naru#love in the air koi#love in the air: koi no yokan#our youth#miseinen#smells like green spirit#blue canvas of youthful days#interview with the vampire#bl series#japanese bl#thai gl#taiwanese bl#chinese bl#filipino bl#korean bl
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Reader fails at flirting - Mihawk, & Crocodile
Content: SFW content, clumsiness, ranting, & bad pick up lines
Notes* Thank you for your patience while I struggled through my writerās block! This was a request from a looong time ago but I no longer have that ask to reply to it seems. I believe Smoker was also supposed to be here, but Iām just going to upload this and take it easy while I get back into the writing spirit :)Ā
Mihawk
Not the type for talking, attempts at flirting with Mihawk usually end up with long, awkward silences that you feel the need to fill, which makes you sound even more awkward as you bounce from topic to topic
He was always the first to show up at the Warlord meetings, and since you worked in the building, it gave you an opportunity to chat him up as you pour the champagne for each guest
He only barely glances at you every now and then as you try to get his attention, ranting on about whatever comes to mind in the moment and asking him questions that he doesnāt respond to
You always end up feeling defeated at the end of the day. Always left with the heavy feeling that he just doesnāt like you, no matter what you say
Eventually you decide that you canāt keep pestering him. Next time thereās a meeting, you decide not to shoot into chatter with him when he arrives
You keep your head down, silence in the room. You can feel his eyes on your back as you walk around, watering the plants and doing whatever you can do to stay in his presence without having to talk to him
And then,
āIs something wrong?ā
Youāre embarrassed by how fast you look back at him. Itās the first time heās addressed you. You, stuttering like mad, tell him that nothing is wrong
āYou didnāt greet me today.ā
He soundsā¦ Disappointed. You ask him why he never responded, adding that you thought you had been annoying him, and that you werenāt even sure he knew who you were
Then he says your name- your full one. He starts to repeat information youāve told him about yourself, a mix of information that you had thrown at him over all the different times youāve met him. It touches your heart that he remembers it all
āI know who you are very well, actually. If you gave me a moment to think of my answers, I would have been able to share. You speak too quickly.ā
He explains it so bluntly, but now that you think about it- you didnāt really give him much time to think before you moved on to the next subject. So the awkward silences were just Mihawk trying to put his words together
He urges you to take a seat beside him, that way he can finally give you the responses you were looking for
āYou should try to let the other person respond if youāre going to flirt with them.āĀ
He says it almost scoldingly, but heās smirking at you
Crocodile
As a citizen of Alabasta, Crocodile was someone that many people looked up to. But only you were in semi-regular contact with him
Every now and then, he would come dine at your workplace and every single time, you were his server. Your co-workers were always too intimidated to potentially get something wrong- the man was intimidating, after all -so that meant that anytime he was in, you were the one to face him
He always ordered the same thing when he came, which made it easier after a while. Youād already be walking up to his table with the wine he liked while his food was in the oven before heād even made his order
The problem was that your ridiculous crush on him made you clumsy as hell
The first few times you were safe- the tripping over your feet and dropping plates had only happened out of his view, where it was your co-workers that would laugh or chastise you for not being careful enough
But then it had caught up to you in the worst way
You were taking the wine to his table and, as always, you engaged him in some casual conversation. Something about the weather or asking how his casino was doing
He would always answer shortly. Something of a grunt that either sounded positive or negative, or a short answer of āgoodā or āehā
You were too busy staring at him and waiting for an answer to notice that you were completely missing the glass as you poured his wine
And in turn, he was too surprised at your new, sudden carelessness to answer
Eventually youād noticed as the wine started to spill onto the floor. Crocodile got up from his chair as you scrambled to get the spill contained to just the tablecloth, but also trying to be careful of all the glass on the table
The white tablecloth would be stained for sure
Crocodile just watched the whole time, holding his cigar between his fingers
The next few times went similarly. Youād bring the wine, serve his food, and give the bill- and every time, you would do something wrong.Ā
Forgetting his silverware, serving him the wrong plate, etc.
At least he always tipped you nicely. That never changed
Youād been so determined to make sure everything went right that the next time he walked in, you tried to be extra careful. You brought him his wine and paused, noticing his hand covering his glass.
āJust water today.ā
Three simple words that threw you off. Why? What was wrong with the wine? Was it you?
Your on your way back from getting his ice water when a co-worker steps back, bumping into you from behind and sending you off balance, tipping the serving tray and sending Crocodileās ice-cold water all over him
Your co-worker all but bails out of the dining hall, leaving you slack jawed, staring at Crocodileās ruined suit. You canāt even muster up the bravery to apologize to the man as the ice cubes slip off of him and onto the floor
Then he laughs. Itās a loud, booming laugh that seems even louder while the room is dead silent. Youāre sure youāre going to die there either from embarrassment or his wrath
āIāve never seen someone trip over themselves so much just to get my attention. Itās flattering.ā He says, smirking down at you while youāre still frozen in place. Then he asks you what time your shift is over, and you answer that youāre done in an hour
He tells you to make sure youāre here in 3 hours, that way he can dry off and have a proper conversation with you
Youāre left there, confused, wondering if itās going to be a date or a murder when he returns
#one piece#harleywritesop#hwop#sir crocodile#crocodile x reader#op crocodile#crocodile one piece#op mihawk#mihawk x reader#mihawk one piece#hawkeye mihawk#dracule mihawk
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Christmas in Winona Springs š¤š
Terry Richmond AU
Created By: Erikftglitter
Terryās car had been giving him trouble for miles. He was headed north to visit his great aunt. He was also fond of the thought of a change of scenery, but the flat tire had put an abrupt halt to his plans. The only thing that he could see through the hovering clouds were a few cabins nestled among the trees.
Terry figured that this would be the only way to fix his problem in the current climate. He would check the cabin out, take a look, and find someone to help.
To Terryās surprise, as he got closer to the cabins, he discovered that it was an actual resort. It was home to many different cabins and lodges, as well as camping grounds, tents, and a connecting lake. In the midst of the inconvenience, Terry still took time to appreciate the beautiful scenery.
He was greeted upon arrival within seconds.
The gentleman was older, his face lined with years, but he was as welcoming as could be. He was dressed comfortably and typical for someone who ran a cabin business. He sported a red and black flannel shirt and khaki work pants. He greeted Terry with a warm smile and ushered him out of harsh winds of the evening.
After accepting the manās hospitality and enjoying coffee, Terry eventually explained his circumstance. He figured that the man would know someone with car services. Terry would happily fix the tire himself but he couldnāt get the tire off without the proper equipment.
āItās late. Thankfully your car knew where to cause trouble.ā The man chuckled. āWhy donāt you settle in for the night and we can revisit this in the morning?ā He offered.
āAre you sure?ā Terry felt hesitant. It was never his intention to expect a hand out. He had took care of himself since a child and wasnāt fond of being a freeloader.
āI donāt want to cause any trouble. I can just call a tow truck orāā
āNonsense. Youāre in a pickle. It happens to the best of us.ā The man smiled. His morals refused to allow anyone to struggle in his presence. āStay the night. Get you some food, and tomorrow, weāll fix that tire. No worries.ā
Terry wasnāt sure what to make of it, but something in the older manās voiceāthe calm certaintyāmade him set aside any skepticism. He didnāt have many other options and at least heād be warm and safe.
āThank you,ā Terry finally said. He let his eyes roam the longue. It was supplied with wooden tables, warm, brown furniture with blankets topped over them, and the faint smell of apples and cinnamon felt surprisingly homey.
āMy nameās Lee, by the way,ā the man said as he led Terry to a clean room. āIf youāre up for it, Iāll make you a drink.ā
After the many hours of driving, and the ultimate disappointment of not arriving at his destination, Terry allowed Lee to make him a drink.
They sat at the small resort bar for hours. Terry found Lee to be an entertaining man. They sat and talked about everything and nothing. Lee told stories about the craziest experiences that heās had over the years. A runaway bride being the most memorable. He got a great laugh out of eating on the wedding cake for weeks.
Terry shared a little about himself as well, but he didnāt think of himself as really interesting. He talked about his great aunt, who he was going to visit, his brief time in the service, and that is all that Terry Richmond summed himself up to be. Lee listened to everything though, patiently, never pushing, never judging.
He hadnāt expected to find comfort in the middle of nowhere, but here he wasāsitting across from a stranger who felt more like an old friend. Lee was a wise man.
That night, Terry sat awake in the small guest room Lee had given him, staring at the ceiling, listening to the quiet hum of the place. Tomorrow, heād help out around the resort to show his appreciation. For the first time in a long while, Terry felt needed.
[Two Months Later]
Terry never had the chance to see his great aunt before she succumbed to her illness. Stage 4 pancreatic cancer wasnāt an easy battle, and heās just relieved that she was no longer suffering.
When Lee heard of the news he insisted that Terry stay the week. Being the honest man that he was, Terry wouldnāt allow Lee to house him without helping out. Business was going to become busy again as skiing became more common during the cooler months and Terry was determined to make it easier for Lee. He couldnāt stand the thought of Lee being left to repair cabins in the unforgiving weather condition and snow.
He helped him locate leaks and level the floor inside of the noisier cabins. Leeās resort in Winona Springs was well-loved. Terry would stop to admire the photos that Lee had around the longue of families who came and went. Some even went as far as sending Lee annual holiday cards. Deep down, Terry wondered how it felt to be so loved.
But just as quickly as the thought came it left Terryās mind. This is how he operated. He was unpredictable and flexible. He hadnāt seen home in months. How could he be loved if he disappeared from time and time again? This was his thing. He knew that he was a lone wolf and spent his adult years not trying to fight it.
Terry often filled in the work orders for Lee. He took quite a fall a few weeks before and Terry found himself being more upset than the older man.
āTerry. Iām old. This is the unrelenting truth of age, bud.ā Lee laughed, reaching his hand out for Terry who eagerly helped him off the freshly waxed surface.
āYeah I get that Lee, but donāt you have a nephew or something to help you out.ā Terryās heartbeat quickened at the realization that Lee was in fact an old man. Their unlikely alliance seemingly provided youth to Lee in Terryās eyes. He hadnāt thought about the fact that he was definitely old enough to be his father. Definitely too old to run a rigorous business like a cabin resort alone, where snow and ice were detrimental for someone of Leeās age.
āA nephew? I wish.ā Lee sighed. āMy brothers died much too soon. They didnāt have time to have any children.ā Terry listened. Lee rarely spoke of his own family.
āItās just me and my little girl.ā Lee smiled and reached into his pocket. Terry watched as Lee rummaged through the thick leather wallet before retrieving his point of interest. He offered Terry a photo of a little girl who was missing two front teeth.
āIām assuming sheās no longer a little girl.ā Terry asked, his tone laced with playful sarcasm.
āIām afraid not. Baby girlās big time in New York.ā Lee sighed. āShe visits every Christmas. I just miss the times when we did this together. Just me and her.ā Lee looked down. He was starting to remember just how much he missed his family.
āHer mother died during a snowstorm.ā Terry took a seat next to Lee. He hadnāt realized that he lost his wife so early on. He gave Lee is undivided attention.
āCar slid right off the road just before Christmas Eve.ā Lee still didnāt look up from the floor where his eyes rested. Terry glanced back at the photo and back to Lee. The girl had his exact mocha colored skin tone. Terry wondered how much she resembled the older lad now.
āIs that why you allowed me to stay with you Lee?ā Asked Terry. He knew that Lee came from a generation that was built on community, but Lee was more than polite to him. He took Terry in like he was his own.
āYeah. I feel like she would want me to do that. I wish someone could have done it for her.ā Lee admitted. Taking Terry in during a troubled time helped his conscious. He was more than happy to do it. āI had the space and the resources. So why not?ā Lee smiled.
āYouāre a stand up guy Terry Richmond.ā Lee stated. Terry nodded at the praise. He was grateful for the opportunity to listen and learn from Lee.
āHoping to be like you one day Mr. Parker.ā They both laughed at the formality. They sat in silence for a while, silently watching the snow fall onto the ground. Terry wasnāt sure how long heād be around but he knew that he wouldnāt be leaving his new friend alone anytime soon.
#terry richmond#terry richmond x oc#aaron pierre#terry richmond au#terry richmond fanfiction#rebel ridge#black fanfic writer#black fanfiction#erikftglitter#ciwp
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Azerbajian GP Weekend Part 2
Masterlist
The engine hummed beneath me, a steady rhythm that barely masked the tension coiling in my chest. Halfway through the Azerbaijan Grand Prix, I was still holding P10. A solid position, but I couldnāt help the restless fire burning in my veins. The car felt goodāresponsive, nimbleābut it wasnāt enough. Not for me. Not when I had to prove so much more than the others ever expected.
Santinoās words echoed in my mind like an unbearable buzz. Iād barely had a chance to catch my breath from the barrage of rumors swirling around me when his latest attempt to undermine me dropped like a bomb. Santino Ferrucci, a man who had never seen the value in anyone else unless it served him, was now playing his cards to feed the gossip machine. The same ex-teammate whoād made it clear from the moment I stepped into the F2 paddock that he wanted nothing to do with me. The same guy who didnāt even give me the chance to prove myself before deciding I was nothing more than a distraction. Now, somehow, he had the media eating out of his hand, painting me as some kind of problem child, someone who didnāt belong.
I gripped the steering wheel, teeth clenched, my eyes narrowing as I weaved through the unforgiving turns of the Baku City Circuit. The whispersāthose rumorsāwere becoming louder and louder in the background of my mind. The media. The drivers. My ex-teammate. They all thought they could write my story for me, that they could decide my worth before I ever had a chance to prove myself.
But they were wrong.
I could feel the heat rising in me. The pressure to be perfect. To show them all that I was more than just a headline. That I was more than Santinoās petty attempts to tear me down. He didnāt know half of it. Didnāt understand how hard Iād worked, how much Iād sacrificed, or what I had to overcome just to be here. Every inch of my success had been earned, fought forānot given. And I wasnāt about to let a jealous ex-teammate or a handful of shallow opinions take that away from me.
As I entered the DRS zone, I could see the cars ahead of me, their tail lights glowing like targets. I knew I had to stay focused. Keep my head clear. If I was going to finish this race the way I wantedāno, the way I needed toāI couldnāt let their words break me.
With a snap of my fingers on the steering wheel, I activated the DRS. The rush of speed surged through me, and I pulled in on the cars ahead, inching closer to the top six. I didnāt have to look back to know that the battle for the points was heating up behind me, but I could feel the fire inside me intensifying with each lap, fueled by the hatred Santino had tried to spread.
They thought Iād fall. They thought the rumors would hold me back. They thought I couldnāt handle it.
But I was going to prove them wrong.
I floored the throttle, my mind locked in on the finish line. With every corner, every straight, I could feel the anger, the frustration, and the hunger building inside me. I wasnāt just racing against these driversāI was racing against the world that had already counted me out. By the time I crossed the finish line, they wouldnāt just remember my name. Theyād remember how hard I fought to earn my place.
P6.
It wasnāt just a position on the board. It was my victory. My revenge against the whispers, the lies, and the people who underestimated me.
And as the checkered flag waved in the distance, I knew one thing for sure: I would never, ever let anyone define me again.
The celebrations following the end of the race were a blur of cheers, high-fives, and the kind of joy that made all the hard work worth it. A smile finally returned to my face as it sunk ināI had done it. P6. I had crossed that finish line ahead of so many doubters, my heart racing with a mixture of exhaustion and triumph.
It felt surreal. After all the rumors, all the noise, all the moments of doubtāI had pushed through. And not only had I made it to the top ten, but I had also outperformed my own teammate, who had finished just behind me in P7. The pride I felt wasnāt just for the result, but for what it represented. I wasnāt just a placeholder. I wasnāt just surviving in this paddock. I was racing. I was competing. I was proving that I belonged here, every bit as much as anyone else.
Franco caught my eye across the paddock, grinning from ear to ear as he raised his fist in my direction. Weād both pushed so hard, and now, we had something to celebrate. It felt good to finally have something that belonged to meāsomething I had earned, without anyoneās help or approval.
I glanced over at the screen showing the final race standings, and there it was: P6. The numbers didnāt lie, and neither did my efforts. This race wasnāt just a win on the boardāit was a win for everything I had fought against, everything I had pushed through. I had done more than prove myself to my team; I had proven something to myself. And that was worth celebrating.
Yet, when I finally reached the end of media pen, my smile quickly faded. I had barely stepped into the area when I saw who was waiting for me. Of course, it was himāthe same interviewer who had tried to tear me down from the very beginning. The one who had asked all the probing, personal questions, pushing me to crack in front of the cameras. It wasnāt just that he had a way of twisting words; it was that he seemed to take pleasure in it.
I could see his smug expression as he adjusted his microphone, ready to ask the same pointed questions he always did. He had even been the one to interview my ex-teammate, Santino Ferrucciāthe guy who had never once given me a chance to prove myself in F2, and whose lies about me had been used to fuel the worst rumors that followed me.
The thought of it was enough to make my blood simmer. I had worked my ass off to make it here, to get to this moment, and yet here I was againāstaring down someone who was more interested in sensationalism than the hard work behind it all. It felt like a constant uphill battle, one I was tired of fighting, but I knew I couldnāt back down. Not now. Not when I had just shown the world what I was capable of.
I squared my shoulders, trying to push down the frustration rising in my chest. This wasnāt the time to show weakness, not with all that I had fought for hanging in the balance.Ā
I took a deep breath, trying to maintain my composure as the interviewerās voice broke through the hum of the paddock.
āSo, y/n,ā he began, his tone already carrying the sharp edge I knew all too well, āthere's still a lot of talk about your time away from racing. Many people are wondering why you left F2 so abruptly. Some say it was just a matter of timing, that you were simply ātrainingā for F1... but others think thereās more to the story.ā
I could feel my jaw tighten as he carefully crafted his words. He wasnāt just asking for informationāhe was fishing, poking at a wound I wasnāt ready to reopen. I could hear the whispers in his voice, the way he implied I was hiding something.
I clenched my fists, but kept my face neutral. āI've already said this before,ā I replied, my voice steady despite the rising anger bubbling beneath the surface. āI left to train. I needed to focus on becoming the best version of myself, and I made the choice to step away so I could be ready for the challenges ahead. And honestly, thatās all there is to it.ā
His eyes narrowed, not buying it for a second. He pressed on, undeterred. āRight, right. But... you didnāt mention much about what happened during that time. Rumors have been circulatingāspecifically about your sudden departure and your reasons for being away. You see, many believe you had personal matters going on, things that werenāt exactly... racing-related. Some have even suggested your absence was tied to... other things.ā He let the last part hang in the air like a threat.
I could feel the heat rising in my chest, my fists tightening into balls of anger. I could already tell where this was going, and I wasnāt going to let him drag it out. He wasnāt going to paint me as some secretive, unprofessional driver just because of his own assumptions and the garbage people like Santino had been spreading.
I stared him down, my voice cutting through the tense air. āYou donāt know what youāre talking about,ā I said, my tone unwavering. āYou can ask all the questions you want, but the truth is, youāre just speculating. And frankly, Iām tired of answering questions based on rumors. So if youāre looking for some juicy story about me, youāre not going to find it here. Iāve moved on, and so should you.ā
The interviewer wasnāt backing down. He smirked, pushing further, almost daring me to break. āYou know, some of these rumors have real consequences. People in the paddock have talked about you being too emotional, not cut out for this level of competition. And others... well, they wonder why youāve clung so tightly to that turtle necklace. Surely thatās a little... odd, donāt you think?ā
The words hit me like a slap in the face. He was baiting me, trying to get me to say something that would let him twist it into another story. But this time, I wasnāt going to let him get away with it. The anger that had been simmering in my gut finally boiled over.
I leaned forward, my eyes narrowing as I locked onto his smug expression. āYou want to know why I wear this necklace?ā I said, my voice low and dangerous. āYou want to know what it means?ā I didnāt wait for him to answer. āItās because of my mother. She passed away while I was away. I had to leave everything behind because she was dying. And now sheās gone. So if you want to keep throwing insults and rumors at me, go ahead. But you donāt know what itās like to lose someone like that. You donāt know what I went through.ā
The words hung in the air like a punch to the gut. The interviewer fell silent, his expression faltering as my words sank in. The entire paddock seemed to freeze, the tension hanging thick. I didnāt care about the cameras, the microphones, or the rumors anymore. This was the truth. My truth.
I took a steadying breath, still seething with anger, and stood up. āAnd as for the turtles,ā I continued, my voice still shaking with emotion, ātheyāre a reminder of her. Not because I think Iām slow, but because she loved them. Because they remind me of her strength. She was a fighter. And Iām going to keep fighting for her. So you can keep spinning your stories, but Iām done talking to you.ā
With that, I turned on my heel and walked away, leaving the stunned silence in my wake. I could feel every pair of eyes on me, but I didnāt care. The interview had turned into something else entirelyāa moment of truth I wasnāt about to take back.
I didnāt know if I had silenced the interviewer or just made everything worse, but I didnāt care. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I had taken control. And if that meant walking away from this media circus, so be it. I had nothing to prove to them anymore.
I marched into my driverās room, desperate for some space to breathe and escape from the chaos swirling around me. The weight of everythingārumors, lies, the pain of the dayāsettled deep in my chest, threatening to choke me. Tears burned behind my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Not now. Not here.
I paced the room, my fists clenched, trying to keep the floodgates closed. But then, just a minute or two later, I heard a knock at the door. My heart skipped a beat, and I forced myself to take a deep breath before walking over to answer it.
When I cracked the door open, I was met with the sight of Franco, flanked by Lewis and, for some reason, Charles. I hesitated, unsure if I wanted to deal with anyone right now.
Franco noticed my reluctance and offered me a softer, sad smile. It was enough to break through the anger clouding my mind.
āPlease, Hermosa,ā he said gently, his tone filled with concern. āLet us chat in private. Just a few minutes. Please.ā
I glanced over at Lewis and Charles, who were standing behind Franco, their expressions unreadable but soft enough that I could tell they werenāt here to make things harder for me. With a sigh, I pushed the door open a little wider, stepping aside to let them in.
The moment they entered, the tension in the room seemed to lighten slightly, but it didnāt take away the knot that had formed in my stomach. I wanted nothing more than to curl up and be left alone, but I knew they were here to helpāwhether I liked it or not.
Charlesās voice cut through the silence in the room, surprising me. He wasnāt usually the first to speak up, but the sincerity in his words caught me off guard.
āFirst, I want to apologize,ā he began, his expression softening. āFor allowing myself to believe the rumors, even for a second. I should have known better, especially after all these years. And Iām sorry. I know I canāt fully understand what youāve been going through, but I can relate to losing a parent before they truly got to see you succeed. Itās one of the worst feelings in the world. I may not know what itās like to hide behind rumors to protect your pain, but I know the grief of losing someone close to you.ā
His words hit harder than I expected, and I could feel the weight of his empathy in his tone. Charles smiled at me, a smile that held more vulnerability than Iād ever seen from him before.
āI want to offer you my help. I want to be someone you can turn to, someone who will listen without judgment,ā he continued. āItās definitely owed to you, after everything... after ignoring you just because of some baseless rumors.ā
I didnāt know how to respond at first. My heart felt heavy with the realization that someone who had once been indifferentāif not coldātoward me, was now standing here, offering support when I needed it most. I blinked, trying to gather my thoughts before I spoke, but the sincerity of his apology left me momentarily speechless.
Franco stepped forward then, placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Hermosa, you don't have to say anything right now. Just know that we're here for you, whenever you're ready."
For the first time in what felt like ages, I allowed myself to relaxāif only for a moment. I was still angry. I was still hurt. But, perhaps, things were starting to change.
Lewisās voice broke the moment of silence, his tone lighter than before. āYou donāt have to worry about that interviewer anymore, by the way,ā he said, his words catching me off guard.
I raised an eyebrow, confused. "What do you mean?"
Lewis smirked, leaning back slightly with a look of satisfaction in his eyes. āWell, as much as I would have loved to be the one to hand his ass back to him on a silver platter, Max beat me to it.ā He chuckled, clearly amused by the turn of events. āAt least we found something else to agree on.ā
I couldnāt help but let out a small, surprised laugh at his casual tone. It was good to hear that Max had stood up for me again. Francoās smile widened, clearly relieved by the lighter shift in the conversation. āGood. That man deserved it,ā he muttered under his breath, more to himself than anyone else.
I nodded slowly, taking in what they had said. Despite the chaos of the day, it was comforting to know that not everyone believed the rumors or enjoyed feeding into the drama. I appreciated their support, even if it was difficult for me to fully let go of the anger still simmering inside.
"Thanks, Lewis," I said, finally finding my voice again. Lewis shrugged nonchalantly, his grin still there. "Weāve all been there at some point. Itās about time some of the nonsense gets put to bed, donāt you think?"
I nodded, feeling a small weight lift from my chest. Suddenly, Franco let out a soft laugh and, without warning, shoved his phone into my hands. "Youāve got to see this," he said, his voice full of amusement.
I looked at him, confused for a moment, before I glanced down at the phone. Franco had already queued up a video, and my eyes went wide as I saw Maxās familiar figure step into the frame right after I had stormed off.
Max stood at the media pen, his jaw clenched and eyes narrowed as he stared directly at the interviewer who had just tried to tear me down. His voice cut through the air, sharper than I had ever heard it.
āIf you want to keep making up lies about someone whoās just here to race, you can keep doing that,ā Max started, his tone filled with frustration. āBut donāt you ever come at her like that again. Itās one thing to talk trash, but youāve crossed a line.ā
The interviewer shifted uncomfortably, but Max wasnāt done. He stepped closer, his voice growing louder with each word, making sure everyone in the vicinity could hear him.
āYouāve been digging so deep, trying to unearth some dirty little secret, but all youāve managed to do is expose yourself for what you really areāa pathetic excuse for a journalist," Max continued, his eyes burning with anger. "You think you know the full story, but you donāt know anything about whatās going on behind the scenes. You want to judge her? Letās talk about your pathetic need to pry into peopleās lives for a cheap headline."
He paused, letting the words hang in the air for a moment, giving the interviewer no room to respond.
"She's been protecting her family, dealing with a loss that most people would never understand. Her motherās been gone for weeks now, and sheās been putting all of her energy into racing. All youāve managed to do is twist that into something ugly. So next time you want to attack someone, maybe you should take a good look in the mirror and figure out who the real asshole is here.ā
Maxās words hung in the air, silencing the crowd around him. The interviewer had no comeback, his face going pale. Maxās fierce defense had not only shut him down but had made it clear: he wasnāt going to let anyone continue to harass me without facing the consequences.
I stood there, a little in awe, feeling an unexpected warmth in my chest. Max had always been a competitor, but seeing him stand up for me like this... it was something else.
Franco let out a chuckle as I stared at the screen. "Max doesn't usually get involved in stuff like that, but... youāve got to admit, it's nice to see him standing up for you."
I was almost speechless. Seeing Max, of all people, not just defend me but make such a statement to the media made me feel something I hadnāt expectedāgratitude. I looked up at Franco, who was still grinning like a proud big brother.
āI... wow,ā I muttered, still processing the video. āThatās... thatās really something.ā
Franco smiled, his eyes softening as he watched me. āTold you. People are starting to see the truth.ā
It was a small victory, but it felt like a step in the right direction. It was a reminder that, even in the midst of all the chaos, not everyone believed the rumors or was content to let them fly.
I exhaled slowly, trying to shake off the mix of emotions swirling inside me. "I guess maybe there's still hope for some of them, huh?"
"Absolutely," Franco said, his grin widening. "And youāve got us. Always."
#x reader#f1 angst#driver!reader#f1#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fic#formula 1#max verstappen#charles leclerc#oscar piastri#lando norris#franco colapinto#lewis hamilton#carlos sainz#george russell#grill the grid#f1 grid x reader
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HOME | 1 of 2 SERVINGS ā JJ MAYBANK x OC [Fall Randoms] š¤
A/N: This wasn't planned! The fandom makes it a little unenjoyable to write for this show but I like many have always had a soft spot for JJ. So here I am, after a while writing something because he deserves it.
WARNINGS: Language + better endings (delusions)! & the usual banter between the rest of the pogues like a family would! + Kiara x femOC as well.
.š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„
IN A PERFECT WORLD no one would have to worry about a thing. People would live exactly the way they want to live without any judgmentāas long as youāre not harming others of courseāand just go on about their business.
Lifeās good because it all worked out in the end.
The comforting thudding of a certain heartbeat only made Alma want to bury her head further into his chest. It was a common morning routine, waking up in each otherās embrace. The insomnia didnāt bother Alma much anymore, she can speak for herself on that, because the longer she stayed awake, the longer time she had. This journey through earth goes by as fast as you blink. This bothered JJ to his core, that after all this time, Morocco was still on her mindānot only that but Portugal too.
No amount of pills or melatonin (or "the purple devil," she liked to call it) was a friend of Almabelle Laytonās. Unfortunately in her teen years she was a bit of a pill popper, it all started because of her mild case of vertigo and her motherāwhenever she decided to fly back into the OBX for a couple of daysāforced her to go to the doctor, after getting tired of her daughter constantly choosing weed over āproperā health.
Alma was a huge advocate for natural remedies, knowing that majority of the medicine given to you is nothing but poison, since it may fix one problem but cause another.
We can talk about that at another time, though!
Regardless sheās grown used to being up with the moonlight and sunrise just monitoring JJās heartbeat. It wasnāt healthy by any means, she didnāt need a therapist (Dr. Montague) to tell her that but this brought her relief. Every morning, JJ would squeeze her shoulder and kiss the top of her head, voice full of sleep while he wished her a good morning.
Then she would respond with pressing a kiss to the old wounds of his abdomen from five years ago, 1-4-3 times before lifting her head to meet his hues of blue-green. The hand that didnāt hold onto her shoulder, would run a thumb along the rings underneath her eyes. Heād tried to hide the worry in his own but a soft smile was still on the corner of his lips the longer he looked at her.
She always had his heart so he felt like she didnāt have to listen too hard.
Never in a million years would JJ believe you (Reader) or a physic? If they told him this is where his life would be now. Owner of two properties, with his childhood home being transformed into an adoption agency. However with the treacherous adventure to get the blue crown, and all that they went through to get it back, it was only right that he did something that made sense.
JJ talked about it constantly with Alma and even mentioned it to the rest, who were skeptical but once it was pulled off, there were equal amounts of pride in their eyes at the grand opening. So where was his physical home? JJ got the Genrette home after the whole DNA testing process and the will was brought to his attention.
Letās just say, shout-out to Paw-Wes!
āIs it weird that Iām choosing this place over my own home?ā Alma remembers JJ asking her, after she plopped down on one of the old couches and tried not to inhale any dust.
He was walking all around the heavily decorated living room, touching any and everything. This was the day right after he agreed to take on the Genrette residence permanently.
Alma lightly shook her head, her short dark hair falling into the corner of her eyelashes, āNo, I think youāre choosing whatās best for you and thereās nothing wrong with that. You get the chance to choose now because baby JJ didnāt, your mother didnāt.ā
And thereās a new glint in his eye at Almaās words when he plops beside her. Her hand goes to rest on top of the one JJ has resting on his knee. Immediately he intertwined their hands, peering into Almaās ink colored eyes. āThanks for being here with me, Kit.ā
āCourse, pumpkin.ā She replies with her own personal nickname, before resting her head on his shoulder.
Building a home here, gave JJ the chance to know a family he never had the privilege to. It was a ball of emotions but he took it on because he felt like he needed to. A new beginning on his own terms this time around. To try to be close to what could have been, but also finding what always felt like what was missing in his life and holding on to it as best as he could. Although they couldnāt be physically here, JJ made it his mission to have talks with both Larissa and Wes out in the mausoleum often.
That was a project Alma took on, cleaning it up while paying her respects. It was sort of a birthday gift to JJ and once received, he thought he couldnāt love Almabelle anymore than he already did. Of course he could have paid someone to continue with the upkeep of his relatives but the pogues werenāt meant to accept handouts. It was all work hard and play hard. Being an investor in the adoption agency (which took a lot of learning and patience! Something JJ barely had.) along with still taking part in Poguelandiaāwhich was mostly ran by John B and Sarah nowāand having his own landscaping business, JJ found himself finally letting out a much needed long exhale.
Life was meant to be lived and it definitely was.
And for once it felt alright.
More than.
Like the floating of waves at your back, gliding you back to shore.
āHey!ā Sarahās all grins as she throws her arms around Almabelle in a tight embrace, as the two women lightly sway from side to side.
It was almost as if the two werenāt just hanging out last weekend, or talking on the phone the day before last. Alma and Sarah grew even closer since her little one was the godson of JJ and that automatically meant Alma was the number one auntie.
Cleo, Wheezie, and Kiara all thought otherwise!
āThereās my favorite little guy!ā JJ boasts, yanking the five year old from John Bās arms to hold upside down by his ankles before pulling the squealing chocolate haired boy back into his embrace.
Smiling softly at the two, Alma enjoyed seeing JJ with Jeremiah (yes, named after JJ himself) John Routledge. Having ālittle jā in their lives changed everything for the pogues; let them all be aware that there was more life out there and all of them had no problem going after it.
John B playfully shakes out his arms at Little Jās weight, making Sarah playfully whack his shoulder, before he slips in to give Alma a side hug in greeting, āWhatās going on, Alton? Iāve got the pies out in the Twinkie.ā
Yes, she was still (barely) running and although The Routledgeās have a more dependable car, the Twinkie was still their go to. Plus little J loved it and as parents, they would do anything to bring their child happiness.
āYou say hi to the pretty lady.ā JJ whispers into Little Jās ear, who already had his bright eyes (that were handed down to him from Ward) set on the bronze skinned woman.
Alma holds her arms out, Little J comes right to her, pressing a slobbery kiss to her cheeks. āAw, thank you! Glad to see you too, pea.ā
He was the perfect combination of his parents: chocolate ringlets for hair, almond shaped eyes like his mother with her fatherās color eyes, high cheeks bones like John B, faint dimples on his cheeks from both parents, and a sweet smile just like Sarahās.
Sarah laughs as she informs her friend, āIf you need napkins, I have plenty!ā
āThatās my boy!ā JJ claps and points at little J, āBut remember, thatās still my lady, huh?ā He ruffles his hair, then winks at Alma before stepping out of the home to help John B with the desserts.
Leaving the men to deal with that, the three make their way towards the slightly closed off emerald green kitchen.
āI hope you didnāt overdo it with the pies this time, Sarah.ā Alma says to the almost completely blonde woman, who gives an innocent shrug.
Sarah opened up her own cafe, Wet Bean CafĆ©, which was unfortunately in constant competition with Ruthieās shitty restaurant. Itās been five years and that pathetic Ruthie still couldnāt stop her bullying ways. After dealing with massive flooding out in the cut, Sarah decided to make the decision to move it into town, using the inheritance Ward left behind, where she had to pay more for rent on the building, which Rafe was the property manager of. Go figure! The original WBC was a small lavender painted space, with a little drive-thru on the side, with two sets of bistro tables outside, and only room for three tables inside that were set up along the brick walls, with checkered floors. It felt very diner-like inside with its quirks and jukebox. The cafĆ© was filled with Sarahās baked goods and became a favorite in Kildare. It was Sarahās but she had to make the decision to move back into town after the land had severe damage and couldnāt be built on anymore, which JJ helped confirm.
āThereās no such thing,ā Sarah replies as Alma holds her son on her hip for a moment longer, āAs much as these guys eat? Thereās never enough! Plus itās less than what I started with since most were donated all over the communities.ā
This didnāt shock Alma.
In almost every way, all of the pogues found ways to give back, especially for those that were still struggling to make it.
āDid you hear from Cleo yet?ā Sarah suddenly asks, after stealing a pineapple chunk from the charcuterie board.
Alma shakes her head before putting Little J down on his feet but he still holds onto the end of her wine colored shirt, āOnly in texts. JJ was originally going to pick Pope up from Dare County because Cleo wasnāt sure if she was going to get in on timeā¦there were delays with her helicopter situation.ā
Thatās right.
Cleo decided to heavily get into engineering and undergoing flight training. Sure sheās spent much of her times on boats, like most of the pogues but once Pope actually enlisted into the service to be a marine, it just made sense to want to know the mechanics of how boats and helicopters worked. Cleoās always been a traveler so this path and with her cut from the blue crown, she had the skills that were already instilled and amplified them once she hit the books.
She had her own helicopter that she flew over on her own back to the OBX from time to time, his name was āsquigglyā because he never flew straight once first brought into the air. Alma honestly preferred taking a boat rather than a flight to Nassau but that one time for John B and Sarah C. Routledgeās anniversary trip was unforgettable thatās for sure!
āIāll check on her after I come back from the bathroom.ā Sarah informs, āAre you okay withā
Blowing out a raspberry, Alma peeks down at little J who was already grinning up at her, āWeāll be just fine, shoo.ā
Bending down Alma picks up little J to sit on the counter, lightly singing at him who was full of giggles at her source of entertainment, before she plucked up a slice of pear from one of the pear treeās out front to hand over to her nephew. Her hands rested on the counter, caging him in as he snacked on the fruit, leaving her the chance to look at all the food that covered the spacious island. A large yawn rips through her lips before she can stop it, which makes little J laugh at the woman. āAuntie Mama needs a nap,ā the boy teases one of his many aunts.
Alma playfully scowls at the boy, going to tickle him by the neck. Even if Alma wanted a five minute nap, her mind wouldnāt grant her that pleasure. She could have laid in bed forever with JJ but knew there were a few last minute things she needed to get done for this dinner, although Almaās been preparing for the last week! A hostās job is never truly done. This wasnāt Almaās first gathering for the holidays but it did bring a sense of joy that both she and JJ could provide this for their friends.
āI knew it would smell delicious in here!ā A familiar voice called out, making Alma glance over her shoulder.
A smile graces the womanās lips, āIs that Kie-Kie?!ā
āThe one and only.ā She flicks her blown out hair over her shoulder as she pulls her friend by the elbow to embrace the sleep deprived woman, followed by her hands thrown over Almaās shoulders.
Kiara had her eyes set on Little J, just in case while she embraced Alma before the two separated.
She then makes grabby hand motions to the five year old, āThatās right come on over to your favorite auntie!ā Kiara smirks as she peppers the kidās face with kisses while Alma scoffs.
Alma walks over to the stove across the room to turn off the handmade potpourri, āGirl, whatever! You look good! That have anything to do with your time out in the big apple?ā
Kiara met Joey Del Marco who was a touron, funny enough about a year after what transpired during the fourth of July. Joey was originally from the east coast but vacationing with her new friends and she captured Kiaraās attention. It was hilarious trying to see Kiara deny her attraction and then feelings towards Joey, who extended her time out here just to see what would happen between the two. Joey fit in just as well with the group of friends: she was loud, proud, rebelliousāyou readers can only imagine what kind of shit she got into with JJ, both Alma and Kiara made a few trips to bail the two out of jailābefore Alma got pissed enough to make JJ stay in there.
There was never anything wrong with fun but after the time the friends all had across the seas? Was too close and JJ had to learn that.
Alma was just overjoyed to see Kiara in a happy relationship. The girl was glowing, traveling back and forth from the south to the east coast since Joeyās dance career has taken off. Of course New York was the place to be for it and the distance between the two seemed to work for them just as it did for Pope and Cleo.
āMaybe,ā Kiara dragged out and sent the short haired woman a wink just as the loud chatter from John B and JJ hit her ears in the background, āShe wanted to be here but you know how showbiz goes.ā
Alma only knew part of what Joey shared and it was exactly what Alma did not want. She could not stand the spotlight being on her yet these few pogues absolutely made a name for themselves, along with her being in love with the most well-known trouble maker on the island, who surprisingly (to those around the island) turned their life around in the span of five years.
Alma fans her hand about, just happy that Joeyās craft was also successful, āAh, tell her to not to worry about it. Thereās always Christmas and New Years to catch up.ā
JJ interrupts as he carries some lavender colored boxes into the kitchen, āChristmas will definitely be at JBās and Sarahās! And New Years in New York with Kie and Joey?ā
John B used his portion to start rebuilding the chateau before Little J was brought into the world in late April. That of course did not come easy and they took Alma and JJ up on their offer to stay with them (mostly in Dempās quarters of the property, in which Alma scrubbed extremely clean, shout out to another trigger and coping mechanism! that is up until the colder months approached and squirrels decided to come down the fireplace) until they got the chateau the way they wanted. That was a story in itself but definitely brought the couples all closer.
Kiara pushed her lips out in thought, āā¦Iām down.ā
āYāall donāt know what cold is until you spend time in the city.ā Alma tells the four, after inhaling the mixture from the boiling pot in hopes that the spice will give her a burst of energy.
When she was younger and not allowed to stay at home on her own, Alma had the chance to travel more with her mother who brought her to California and New York every so often. Her mother was a U.S. Customs agent who was originally from California and where she got her start in her career. She never meant to get pregnant with Alma but again, life happens and you do what you have to do. She moved Alma to the Outer banks simply because her parents lived out there and felt that would be a better place for her to grow up. Most of her time was spent in an empty home or with her hearing impaired grandparents until their passing when she was fifteen. She learned a lot from her grandparents and always thanked them for how she turned out. Alma never knew her father but she had a god-father who filled in as her father figure although he too, also lived on the west coast. Her step-father tried to be in her life but he was constantly on the go just like her mother and their marriage felt like convenience rather than love.
Alma never wanted a repeat of that kind of life in her future. She needed to be present, true, and never neglectful and of course things can never be perfect but itās always the effort that matters.
Kiara huffs as she holds out her hands for Little J to keep high-fiving her hands, āHa! Not with global warming constantly being against us.ā
āOh here she goes.ā John B mutters, reaching out to spin little J in the air to say to him before putting him down, āTell auntie Kie, youāre too young to listen to this crap.ā
āItās far from crap! The earth is burning and yāall need to stop being so ignorant. Itās never too late to learn about the state of the environment.ā Kiara argues, fists going into her jean skirt covered hips.
Alma smiles at the brunette with a shake of her head while JJ rolls his eyes, and starts mocking her with his hands. Which makes Kiara pick up and chuck a grape at him that bounces off his forehead.
āHey!ā JJ yells, reaching for the chunk of some overpriced cheese, āDonāt start a war you canāt finish, Kie.ā
Kiara furrows her thick brows, āIāve won plenty. Do you need to see my resume?ā
āOoooo,ā John B instigates.
That is coming from your very own Mayor of OBX!
Kiaraās always been political and environmentally friendly for as long as Almaās known her. She juggled a lot, from creating a sustainable healthy smoothie drink business that was often sold in WBC but she eventually sold that off once she got deeper into politics. However Kiara did not completely sign over her rights without the promise of keeping her deliveries of supplies in Sarahās cafe.
The doorbell made Alma zone back in on the typical arguments the two were having. She seemed to be the only one who heard it, taking her leave to the front entrance of the home to answer the door.
Rafe Cameron stood on the front step, arms full of alcoholic beverages. āHey,ā he starts.
He still looked the same, no longer sporting a buzzed hair cut, hair grown out in some sort of a mullet with spiked ends followed by a bit of facial hair growing in. He looked older yet his eyes still held unresolved issues and secrets.
Thereās confusion in Almaās brown eyes since she knew that she didnāt invite him to Friendsgiving and she also knew JJ didnāt invite Rafe either. Their beef ran deep and had its ups and downs, considering that the two knew just how to get up underneath one anotherās skin. Yet the events that occurred in Essaouira and Lisbon did shift something in their relationship.
āArenāt you going to let me in or let the dragonflies fly in?ā Rafeās sarcasm was possibly an attempt to break the ice or at least be funny but all Alma could do was blink.
Thereās footsteps Alma hears and it doesnāt take long for her to figure out who they belong to. Consideringā¦you know sheās lived and been around the guy for a while now!
āThe hell are you doing here?!ā
Rafe lifts his shoulders, āWhatās it look like?ā
āLike youāre about to get the door slammed right in front of your stupid lookinā face.ā JJ snaps.
Rafe rolls his eyes, āI got an invite just like everybody elseā¦you got a problem with itā
āYeah I do. Itās our house!ā
āWhich I can easily buy from you, Maybank.ā Rafe smirked and Alma pinched the irritation forming in between her brows.
Those two still had their moments.
The dark haired twenty-something year old immediately grabbed onto JJās forearm, to stop him from moving around her to get into Rafeās smug face. āWeāre not doing this, alright! Rafe, I donāt know who invited youā¦but you better be lucky Iām in a good moodā
JJ exasperates with furrowed brows, āNo Alma! No freaking way!ā
Alma knew Rafe had nobody but Sarah (and Wheezie from time to time, the younger of the Cameronās high-tailed it out of the OBX as soon as she hit eighteen). Then there was that up and down relationship he had with Barry (Almaās ex) and she definitely did not need him here either so she would allow it. Of course Rafe didnāt want pity and this wasnāt that, Alma was just in the spirit ofā¦giving thanks. As corny as it sounds and in simplest terms, Rafe was helpful across seas. As much as the pogues all had their personal feelings towards the eldest Cameron, he did pitch in on getting JJ help out in the desert.
A part of Alma felt like she would always be grateful for that.
āRafe? You actually made it.ā John B speaks from behind you all, keeping a hand on Little Jās shoulder who held onto his pants leg, still snacking on a pear slice.
A ghost of a small smile appeared on Rafeās face as he stared over at his nephew.
JJ turns his glare to the brunette who raises his brows, āDonāt tell me you invited him here?ā
Kiara didnāt wipe the scowl off her face either, arms crossed.
āI did.ā Sarah announces her arrival finally returning from the bathroom with her phone in hand, āI know I should have asked you two since it is your house butā¦I wanted everyone I love here. And I hope you guys would be okay with that, to continue moving forward.ā
Almaās eyes met JJās, who appeared as if he was ready to chew his bottom lip off in annoyance. However the longer he stared at his lady, he loosened up, some. Flaring his nostrils he says to Sarah first, āI still wish you would have had a conversation with us first butā¦I get it.ā
JJ turns back to Rafe who meets his gaze, āFine. You can join our Friendsgiving but the second you act like an asshole, Iām throwinā you out on your ass. Got that, Rafe?ā
āYeah, yeah. Iāll be on my best behavior, just like you, right?ā He winks at the blond before barging his way in.
JJ flings the door shut behind him, tapping his elbow into the palm of his other hand, and starts swatting at the air at Rafeās back for practice, earning laughs and snickers from John B, Kiara, and Alma.
Who moves to slip an arm across her boyfriendās waist, āWe can play nice, right? Our house, our rules.ā
āDamn straight,ā JJ answers, eyes connecting with deep brown hues as she pokes her lips out for him to peck.
.š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„ Ż Ė .š„
Part two can be found here since limits have changed for text posts now!
#Spotify#obx netflix#obx season 4#obx s4#jj maybank#jj maybank x oc#jj maybank x reader#sarah cameron#john b routledge#kiara carrera#rafe cameron#queued#fall writings#fall fiction#fall fanfiction
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Okay so the thing is that I wanted a āthe Zenin raised Megumi instead of Gojoā fic but the thing is that Iām absolutely convinced that if the Zenin were the ones that took Megumi they wouldnāt actually take tsumiki too. The fandom consensus Iāve personally seen has been that she would have been taken and mistreated by zenin for being a female non sorcerer but I personally think they would have just straight up left her behind.
They only bought Megumi. They keep non sorcerers and women as servants in their compound but all of them are Zenin themselves. Tsumiki isnāt related and I couldnāt really see any reason why theyād want her. Which turned this into a fic where Tsumiki loses her brother, but sheās trying to find him again, she swears. I think of it as my āsiblings doomed by the narrative desperately try to write a new one where they can be togetherā fic.
The thing is that Tsumikis mom was one of those people who thought love and consumption were synonymous. She had a habit of getting caught up with assholes and justā¦ having both of them chew on each other for a while until it turns into this horrible fucking bloodbath.
Tojis just another loser her mom got caught up in, but heās Tsumikiās favorite out of all the losers, because he gave her her brother. Her mom marries this random guy she barley knows and Tsumikis pretty sure she does it so they can both ditch their kids twice as much, secure in the knowledge that thereās supposedly another person checking in. It works out great for them, because they both stop coming entirely. Itās fine, because Tsumiki has Megumi and Megumi has Tsumiki and they donāt need anything else.
Itās one of those things where they were in really unhealthy circumstances and it made their relationship a little bit unhealthy but not necessarily bad. They both had to grow up way too fast and deal with way too much too soon and become codependent on each other because they are, in the most literal way possible, dependent on one another. Neither of them know how to love in a way that doesnāt involve sacrificing themselves for their sibling, mostly because they donāt have a way that doesnāt involve that.
Theyāre in a sinking ship and tsumiki knows it. Their parents arenāt coming back. The money is going to run out sooner or later. Their problems are stacking up.
Megumi has confessed to her that he sees things that no one else does. When she asks him how he knows no one else sees them, he explains that theyād say something if they did and wonāt say anything else. And she doesnāt know what to believe but she refuses to call him crazy. He tells her that monsters cling to her back and he fights them off for her. She patches up his bruises and cuts and tells him heās brave and tries to figure out if sheās just imagining that her back feels lighter after. He tells her that there are dogs that only he can see that have started following him around, and she tells him she believes him and can never remember, later, if she meant it or was just saying it.
The last time Toji came by, he left them more money than tsumikis ever seen in her life, took them to ice cream, told them that he was sorry he was so shit at this and that the money was Megumiās share in a payment. It was for something he was going to help daddy with later. Tsumiki and him were to use it to take care of themselves and be healthy, because Megumi couldnāt help him later if he wasnāt. And tsumiki was always afraid of what he meant by that, but in the end, she let it slip her mind. After all, Toji hadnāt been by in ages. He probably wouldnāt come by at all.
And he didnāt. But others did. Two men sheās never met before are waiting outside their building one day, and when they see Megumi, they laugh. But the thing that Tsumiki can never get out of her mind later is that she swears they werenāt looking at Megumi directly. They were looking at his dogs.
Tsumiki basically tries to get Megumi and powerwalk past them, but theyāre a lot bigger and a lot stronger and thereās nothing she can do, really. They have a brief conversation about whether they should take her too, before one decides that Toji only sold him his kid and to leave the other behind. This makes both of them try to run, but thereās nothing either of them can do to overpower the men, and the men say that āNaobito would go ballistic if they left the ten shadows behindā so they take Megumi and leave her.
They put Megumi in a car and shove Tsumiki to the curb outside of it, and she tried to hold onto his hand, she swears. She grabbed at the car door even when the car started moving, and she banged on the windows, and she watched as Megumi kicked and punched and screamed inside, until one of them hit him and he went still. She ends up falling and hitting her head when the car picks up speed, and when she wakes up again, the cars gone and she has no idea where it went.
And it becomes a foundational moment for who she is. I think she was just intensely lonely before Megumi and poured a lot of herself into this idea of a family together. Tsumikis never able to shake the moment of her being outside the car and Megumi being on the inside, and not being able to get into him. She can never again get what she felt in that moment out of her head.
She goes to the police and tells them that itās her little brother, his dad sold him but she wants him back, and theyāre like āā¦ā. The issue is that apparently her mom can pick up the damn phone if the police call and she shows up, spins some lie about how her and the stepdad split up and he took the kid with him, they never adopted each others kids so it was within his rights, Tsumiki was taking the separation hard and acting out. She lies, basically, because toji hadnāt kept up his end of the deal and dropped in to check in (neither had she) and his kid wasnāt her responsibility, he could do what he wanted with him. She doesnāt want the police poking around the way she lives. Just let the kid go because heās probably dead and not her real brother anyway.
Tsumiki refuses to give up on him. They were both kids who no one cared about but they cared about each other and that had to be enough. But sheās seven with no support and zero idea on how to find him. She starts skipping school to look for him in random streets, puts up flyers, canāt go outside without looking for him. She gets held back a year in school because of how much she skips and she canāt bring herself to care. She buys him gifts on every birthday and writes him letters she canāt post because sheās going to find her brother and sheās going to prove to him that she never once stopped looking for him. She just. She needs him to know that she never stopped looking for him. She needs to find him and be able to honestly tell him she never stopped trying.
One day her mom comes back in clothes she canāt afford and comes with movers they shouldnāt be able to afford and announces a move they definitely canāt afford. Tsumikis absolutely opposed to going because if her brother comes to look for her, she needs to be in their old apartment so he can find her. She doesnāt have much of a choice in the matter. They have mysterious new benefactors who are setting up a trust to take care of tsumiki with a very generous stipend for her mom but they have to move to Sendai as a stipulation of getting the money.
Itās not until the attorney whoās managing her trust hands her a set of glittery blue butterfly hairpins that tsumiki realizes her mom sold her brother a second time.
The thing is that tsumiki had this one cheap set of butterfly hairpins sheād always stopped to look at in the store when she took Megumi to go grocery shopping. Shed never buy them, because they couldnāt afford it, but it was the thing she wanted most openly in front of him. She was always secretly really insecure about her hair, because they were the kind of poor where bar soap was a luxury they could only sometimes afford and kids at school made fun of how her hair was dirty and frayed. Megumi was the only one who ever saw how badly she wanted those stupid hair clips. If they had to give her a set of butterfly hair clips, itās because he demanded that they did.
Itās basically implied that the Zenin are the ones paying for her care and upkeep due to an unspecified deal they cut with Megumi, but when they approached her mom with it, they added the caveat that Tsumiki had to be moved to a new city entirely and there could be no forwarding address left anywhere.
The zenins stance on tsumiki is, effectively, that sheās a weakness Megumi needs to be weaned off of. They honestly assumed heād just like, forget she ever existed and he. Did not do that. He actually pitched a total bitch fit. Tried to scale the compound walls. Bit multiple people including the clan leader. But heās got the ten shadows, heās heir to the clan, and he canāt be caught up on some random non sorcerer who isnāt even a Zenin. They end up agreeing to pay for her to live very comfortably if he starts cooperating more but they want to make sure that he canāt ever find her again if he does ever succeed in running away.
Tsumiki is at once full of hope and hopeless, because on one hand, the butterfly clips prove that Megumi still loves her and remembers her, at least in her mind. But at the same time, sheās being moved to Sendai and doesnāt know how theyāll ever find each other again. She doesnāt honestly know if theyād recognize each other if they saw each other again. She wears the butterfly clips every day, even when she gets too old for the style, because sheās more confident about her brother recognizing them than her.
The thing about tsumiki is that she doesnāt understand hate. She just doesnāt. Her mom and toji always got caught up in these perceived slights and revenge and never once let go of the past. Theyād destroy themselves if it meant taking down the people they hated with them. She never wanted that. She wanted to live with the people she loved and sheād happily turn around and forget everything, all the pain, all the searching, if it just meant she could go back to being megumis sister.
This isnāt about hate. This is about that moment outside the car, where her brother was inside and she couldnāt get in to him. This is about how helpless and small she felt when they shoved her to the curb and ripped megumis hand out of hers. She needs to make sure that when she finds Megumi, she can take him home again. So she decides she needs to learn how to fight.
Itadori Yuuji has the constitution of an ox and the strength to match it, and he is known for getting in fights with bullies and trouncing them so thoroughly that itās never a question of who wins when the fight starts. Heās insanely physically capable and can hold his own in a fight with ease. Heās also nice and kind and Tsumikiās comfortable enough asking him to teach her how to throw a punch or two.
She is bad at it.
So fucking bad at it.
But she never gives up, and Itadori is nice enough to keep teaching her despite how embarrassingly horrible she is at it all. He always asks her why she wants to learn so bad, she doesnāt seem to like it all, and she never answers his question honestly.
In their last year of middle school, their class has a trip to Kyoto. She, Itadori, and the rest of their group walk into some random restaurant in the city and have barely sat down when someone comes inside, starts searching every booth in the restaurant while shouting Tsumikis name.
And oh. They could recognize each other after all.
She looked for Megumi in every crowd she was ever in, but she didnāt consider that he was doing the same. Or that he would see her first.
Her brother grew up without her seeing it. Hes older, dressed in strange, expensive clothes, has a slightly bruised up face and split lip, but his eyes are the same, and he looks like the brother she remembered.
But a lot more nervous than Megumi ever was. He was a tiny, stoic child who didnāt take any shit and never showed fear, even when there were monsters that only he could see. But heās nervous when he tells her that she probably doesnāt recognize him or remember him, but when she was a lot younger, heā
Megumi. Heās her little brother. Of course she remembers him. Sheās been looking for him everywhere.
Megumi didnāt smile much as a child, but he smiles at her then. He tells her he doesnāt have a lot of time and she tells him that they can leave out the back, and he never let her hold his hand as a child but he takes her hand so easily in that second. And just for a second, sheās his sister again, and itās everything she wanted.
They never make it out the back.
Two men come in. Megumi calls one of them uncle, and he goes stiff and flat the second he sees him. His uncle apologizes for his nephew, tells everyone that he always makes scenes when theyāre out in public, tells him to apologize to the nice people and leave. Megumi was mistaken.
Tsumiki trĆes to keep ahold of his hand. Really, she does. She tries to tell people to call the police. But megumis āuncleā steps towards her and Megumi slams him into a table, and then suddenly Megumiās the one insisting that they leave immediately. They can go. Itās fine. Theyāre leaving. She loses ahold of his hand.
She tries to follow, but the other man restrains her. She learns that sheās better at slamming plates into peoples heads than she is at punching, and at this point itadoris Friend In Danger Override has been triggered and he fucking tackles the dude, which gives tsumiki the clearing that she needs to chase outside after her brother. She gets out just in time to see him be pushed into a car, and sheās had years to think about the last time this happened and figure out what to do differently. She throws herself in front of the car and refuses to move.
See her entire stance is that sheāll sooner get run over and killed in the street than let them do this a second time, but she also can see Megumi trying to fucking punch the drivers head in from behind because heās about to hit his sister. His uncles trying to restrain him, and just for a second, she sees his hands make the shape of the shadow puppets he used to show her as children. Something invisible slams her out of the way just as his uncle knocks him out.
She picks up a rock and tries to smash in the fucking window with it, and itadori has to pull her out of the way to keep her from getting her feet run over when the car finally tears out of the parking lot. She goes ballistic on him for stopping her because her brother was right there and she lost him again and she didnāt even get the license plate. He was right there.
The police basically do jack all again. Thereās no license plate, no names they can follow up on, and theyāre still half convinced this is a settled custody issue even though tsumiki insists her brother was sold by his dad and is very plainly getting hurt wherever he is. Itadori is now a devoted advocate of finding tsumikis brother and reuniting them, and both basically kind of end up becoming really close to the other? Heās taking care of himself and his grandpa alone, sheās alone while her moms awol again, and they both become the others support system.
At one point, thereās this random girl and boy who doesnāt speak who shows up to their school for indeterminate reasons. The girl is bored and twirling her glasses in one hand while the person in a suit that theyāre with asks the principal questions, and when tsumikis eyes catch at the right angle, she sees an invisible monster clinging to a classmates back through them. She realizes itās exactly what Megumi always talked about and still remembers that the people who took him could see his dogs. She corners the two others in a room and tries to demand information about the invisible monsters or see if they know her brother or the people who took him, and immediately gets blown off. The fight escalates until the girl tells him that actually, yeah. She knows tsumikis brother. He is a very special person to some very powerful people, and the only way she can ever help him is to tell him that sheās let go of him and that he needs to do the same to her. Thatās the only message that the people who have him would ever let get through, and his life would get a lot better as soon as he got it.
The people who have him would give him anything in the world, except for her. He could be a lot happier and healthier than he is right now if he just agreed to stop trying to find tsumiki. If she really wants to help her brother, then she needs to let him go.
Tsumiki nails her in the back of the head with a milk carton when she tries to walk away. It sloshes out on her. Tsumiki did not intend this. She cannot admit that fact. There are some actions you just have to own when you do them. She tells the girl that heās her brother and sheās never letting go of him. Sheās going to find him. They canāt keep him from her forever. She doesnāt care how long it takes her.
For a second, tsumiki really thinks this girl is going to kick her ass, but she doesnāt. She wishes her luck and tells her sheāll need it, and itās only later that tsumiki realizes she slipped the eyeglasses into her pocket.
And as it turns out, her brothers monsters were real all along.
There was a knife that toji left in the frame of his bed. Tsumiki confiscated it from Megumi as soon as he found it, and it was odd and strange and gave her bad feelings when she held it, and it can kill the things that gather on her back. When she follows Itadori to their local high school and joins the occult club in an attempt to find more people involved in this world of invisible monsters, she wears the eyeglasses and keeps the knife hidden in her bag.
It comes in handy when her senpais are trying to open this thing and suddenly thereās like a fucking portal opening and Actually Letās Not Oh Too Late Letās Run Letās Fucking Run.
They run.
Meanwhile at the hospital Megumi found out in very quick succession that his sister has fucking sukunas finger and also that thereās a very over enthusiastic himbo who is the self appointed vice president of the Find Fushiguro Megumi And Bring Him Home Club who absolutely fucking refuses to leave his side. Sorry who are you. Why are you so enthusiastic about finding him. Megumi sort of was the one doing the finding there was a whole tracking situation and him waiting dramatically in the shadows like they just did it.
Anyway they run very very quickly to tsumikis school where she is dodging she is serpentining this is a fuckton of monsters oh holy fuck is that her brother?
The fight goes bad.
Tsumiki manages to follow itadori and her brother out at a much slower pace because sheās not a freak of nature like itadori and shows up just in time to see her brother shouting at itadori to not eat the fucking finger while itadori is absolutely trying to eat the fucking finger.
She chucks her shoe at him. The finger goes flying.
Then the monster eats it instead.
Tsumiki: :o
Yuuji: :o
Megumi: fuck
Now thereās a bigger monster and the fight goes even worse. Thereās a lot of shouting. Itadori ends up with her knife. Then he ends up getting eaten and theyāre down both a knife and itadori, whoās probably fucking dead. Then megumis insisting she run and sheās insisting he shut the fuck up because itās sort of taken a decade to get this close to him again and sheās not fumbling the bag now because of a monster on the rampage. Have a sense of fucking priorities here.
Then itadori bursts out of the monsters stomach with the knife like the fucking Kool Aid Man and the fight is suddenly very over. Good job, team.
Gojo rolls up to his most stoic and eternally pissed off student having a dramatic and emotional reunion with his sister.
Yuuji, in a very bad whisper: no no so like sheās been looking for him for years but he saw her in the restaurant
Gojo: :o go on
Yuuji: and then he got caught by like, I donāt know, he said he was his uncle or something but the dude acted so weird and creepy and they put him in a car and Tsumiki tried to stop the car but they got away
Gojo: *gasp* what no
Yuuji: I know! Anyway then I start helping her look for him but we canāt find him anywhere until Iām at the hospital and he just walks up to me right?? And Iām like ādude I have been looking everywhere for youā and heās like āI have no idea who you are, Iām here about that fucked up demon fingerā and Iām likeā
Megumi, really trying to have a moment here: we can both hear you
And megumis like āthis is uh. My new teacher. I guess. I am his only student. And he is uh. Enthusiastic. Do not linger in conversation with him.ā
Tsumiki is lingering. She needs fucking intel so he canāt disappear again. Where does he go to school and can she transfer there. Itās fucking wizard school? Will they take her even though sheās not a wizard? She cannot emphasize enough that she will study any fucking subject they want so that way she can be close with her brother again she does not care if itās applicable to her education or life. She can throw things at people itadori tell the man tell him how enthusiastically she will throw things at monsters for their weird fucking wizard school.
Itadori: she hit me in the face with her shoe like five minutes ago
Tsumiki: see???
Megumi keeps trying to forbid her from wizard school but sheās technically the older sister so she has override rights. She will go to wizard school. How does she get wizard school to accept her.
And Gojos just really weird and off and keeps looking at Megumi and saying that he ādidnāt know he had a sister.ā
He really didnāt know that Megumi had a sister he wanted to stay with.
And then suddenly itās like a switch is flipped and heās back to his normal self telling them to leave everything to him, because heāll make sure tsumiki can come back with them. And uh? Itadori? Weirdly physically capable kid who will apparently eat anything? Is he going to be good getting home after all this?
Itadori: actually if itās not too much trouble can I go to wizard school too my grandpa sort of died half an hour ago and I donāt have plans for the rest of my life. Tsumikis kind of my best friend and Iād like to make sure sheās all good at wizard school. Iām a really good fighter and I stabbed the last monster so like can I come too because you know. Dead grandpa. No family or future to speak of. Haha.
Gojo:
Megumi:
Tsumiki, softly: dude
Thereās more after they make it to jujutsu high but this is already really long so we leave it here
#ask games#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#continuing my streak of becoming obsessed with minor background characters#other highlights include itadori trying to platonically wingman for tsumiki with her brother (because itās been like a decade and she knows#nothing about him and he knows nothing about her and sheās terrified he wonāt like her once they get to know each other again) so that way#itadori can be the one asking the get to know you questions and tsumiki doesnāt have to admit out loud that she and her brother know nothing#about each other only the inherent problem is that her brother is actually unfairly pretty and has a sort of dry wit and is reserved but#when you get to know him heās such a genuine dude and oh fuck oh no heās in trouble this is his best friends long lost brother he has to be#violating some kind of code here. Kugisaki stop laughing at him this is a crisis.#gojo basically backed out of teenage fatherhood when he saw Megumi walking around with the divine dogs because itās one thing to butt heads#with a major clan over an outcast member itās another to do it for their most sacred technique#he thought that Megumi would be better taken care of than anyone else in the clan as the person with the ten shadows and that heād probably#be better off than with an emotionally broken seventeen year old who works at least 28 days a month and has no idea how to raise a child#he never realized that Megumi had a sister he wanted to stay with who the Zenin separated him from#he tells himself he would have intervened if he had known because heās been secretly worried and guilty about not taking in Megumi after all#since Maki showed up and said some worrying things about the clan heir and his standard of living and got the confirmation when he met#tsumiki and realized that he could have kept them together all those years ago and didnt. megumi and tsumiki kind of haunt him with lost#potential because not only could they have grown up a family but they could have grown up his family. megumi doesnāt know why satoru gojo#of all people is being so weirdly helpful and intense about about sponsoring tsumiki and keeping her close to him
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It's been rolling around in my brain the last few days for some reason, but I still hate the family backstory reveals for Sophie and Eliot. I've seen some of the meta for it, but quite frankly, it still makes no sense. If it had been something actually thought of and intentional in the original, I think it could have been so fascinating. I mean, Sophie's willing abandonment of Astrid to contrast with Nate's loss of Sam or Eliot's adoption in contrast with Hardison's and Parker's? Could have been excellent! But they came out of nowhere in Redemption and don't work with these characters.
Sophie was still actively using the fucking alias that she met Astrid under! She met with someone from her past on the show! Like. Quite frankly, that one is unequivocally bullshit that they made up and threw in and pretended could fit with the established canon. (And I'm sorry, but the idea of Sophie abandoning Astrid and never telling Nate about her just... So much of Nate's trauma was rooted in the loss of Sam, and I think that introducing this element after he's gone and unable to respond to it taints Sophie and Nate's relationship in a way bc I'm not exactly sure how Nate would've responded to learning about this but I think that it's something he'd have needed to know. I don't know how to fully express my thoughts on that but yeah.)
As for Eliot, I don't like the adoption aspect literally at all. The way that he would interact with his family and the memory of his family would be different, and I think that it's flat out ridiculous to think that he'd have never mentioned it to the team in the original show, especially when dealing with the kid cases. (I also dislike the biracial adoption as its own element because if Eliot was actually raised by Black parents in the... idk what 80s/90s? That just. doesn't feel congruent with how they write Eliot interacting with PoC, not necessarily in a bad way, but babe, he's written like a white southern man raised in a specific kind of culture that does not jell with that. It also makes Eliot look... really bad that he was apparently raised with the knowledge of how fucked up the military was and his parents' history and made the choices that he did.) Like the show may not have explicitly stated it but the implication of that relationship was vastly fucking different throughout the original show.
Just. These were not backstories that were congruent with their depiction and characters in the original show, and they're also just moves that I don't particularly like or find interesting directions for those characters. There's also something to be said about how it was apparently unacceptable for a woman to not have kids or someone not reconciling with their biological family when that was something that the original show handled a lot better. Out of all the directions to take Sophie and Eliot's stories, that's just not really one that I think was a good idea.
#i'm not sure if i worded this v well tbh which concerns me#bc like. like i said i dont like the adoption plot anyways but part of my problem with that storyline IS that billy is black#bc i don't think that the way eliot is written makes sense if he was raised by a black couple during that decade#bc the way that he would have engaged with his family and community and the world around him would've been different#especially bc he was raised in the fucking south in the 80s#bc i dont think eliot was ever racist in the original show but i dont think that he really knew#how it was different for poc in certain ways that dont make sense if he was raised by a black couple#like the previous implications of his childhood and specifically his father were v much in the stereotypical v pro military be a man cultur#that culture is also v rooted in toxic masculinity and whiteness#God i hope that makes sense bc i feel like that sounds v bad#but i'd love more black characters on the show and i think that for pretty much any other mc that'd have been fine#it's specifically eliot with the space that he occupies that i feel like it's a problem with his backstory#which also is why i dont like that he's adopted at all bc that's an influential part in how you first view your place and family and all th#that i dont think makes sense with eliot's character. like literally nothing about that reveal really feels like it makes sense with eliot#and to move over to sophie for a second i feel like bringing up the abandoned stepdaughter would have been pretty damn important#when sophie was struggling with the idea of who she really was beneath the aliases and the grift#and especially when she's in a relationship with nate who WAS a father like#and that she used the charlotte alias to meet with someone from her past but there wasnt anything about the fallout#which still makes no fricking sense either way#also insert something about sophie being an older woman without kids#(i know there's the ot3 but they're not actually in a position as her kids bc theyre still equals in a sense)#and needing to actually go no no she was a mom! and then bailed and did all this and blah blah but she's always been a mom in her heart <3#and adding in this relationship as if an older woman cant be satisfied or complete without kids#and i know that ppl might bring up parker but like lbr parker is positioned in a v different space narratively than sophie#ofc parker doesn't have kids she's positioned in a space as the Odd one the kinda broken one#her defying the expectations narratively doesnt necessarily work the same bc of her place#idk i kinda hope these dont end up in the main tags bc idk how ppl will respond nor how well i actually got across my points#but i do wanna tag them for my blog so#leverage#sophie devereaux
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with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;
a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.
linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.
#phantom hourglass#linebeck#loz#legend of zelda#salty talks#imo the action vs inaction thing feels esp interesting to me when looking at oshus specifically. he and his world are in grave danger#and he knows it and he actively does nothing and even seems reluctant to let ciela and link go ahead and do something.#of course he comes around on it but it's very interesting. has he given up at that point? thats what it suggests to me#that hes like. joined the people of mercay in just lying down and waiting for other people to fix their problems or just. not do anything#otherwise on mercay you have that old guy in the bar who spends the whole game not leaving bc he doesnt want to face his wife#and she never goes to the bar to actually look for him and just talks about it if anything#the guy with the blue tunic talks a lot about linebeck and his ship and almost gives the impression that he really wants to talk to him#but yknow. doesnt. theres the women that tells you about docks being shut down and how linebeck is the only person who's showed up#the woman you see at the broken bridge who's just like oh well! time to wait til someone fixes it.#even the guy fixing the bridge iirc is like well fuck i gotta do it or else oshus is going to bitch at me abt it#everyone seems reluctant to act which makes for an interesting way in how our main crew stands out#it is less so oh theyve been chosen specifically for this its moreso they're the ones who are fucking doing something about this#for their own various reasons some of which are more selfish but theyre still doing something#will likely have more stuff to say when im done but ofc we have other characters in the game who have to do with this#anyways. linebeck is so animated all of the fucking time it's great i dont think theres any other character that moves as much as him#when he's just standing around to talking to link it's great. he's so ready to get going.#it works with him being an anxious mess and also with like. oh he's probably understimulated. you know he's got a nasty case of wanderlust#i can put it with the idea that he's understimulated and afraid to stim in public so he's just constantly moving#he probably drums his fingers on tables bounces his leg when sitting paces around switches the way he sits or lays down often#tbh this kinda fits in with him being one of the main characters who takes action moreso than a lot of other characters#his arc culminates in him taking action he's going after the ghost ship he's moving around the world the only issue is that one of the#actions he takes is running away from his problems literally n metaphorically (tho idk if facing the jolene problem is a good idea for him)
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footnotes arent enough I need you to talk to me like im fucking Amelia Bedelia
#this isnāt about anything in particular btw. I just have to add a lot of memos when Iām doing things because some things are done a certain#way and it isnāt explained well in the instructions. like my mom has instructions on her baking recipes right#but when it says stuff like add dry ingredients to wet ingredients it also means you donāt dump it in one go you add it slowly by portion#this is probably why I find videos and demonstrations the most helpful when I learn something. like I almost always ask someone to show me#how they do it because there could be something they do thatās already second nature and wouldnāt really be considered in an explanation yk#I donāt think Iām an exception either. when the rice is done cooking I divide it into 4 quarters to bless it#but there are a million ways to divide rice and it makes me think that one persons way of doing it or not doing it all is just as valid#theres also technically no wrong way to divide rice afaik. this means either all ways of dividing rice is safe or valid until we find some#universally terrible way of dividing rice. until that happens nobody really thinks about specifying HOW you divide the rice#source: I have anxiety starting and doing things for the first time because I got way too many people yell at me NONONO WHAT ARE YOU DOING#THATS WRONG while Iām in the middle of doing the thing. I would rather have people think Iām either very stupid or overly specific#than go thru the panic inducing fear of āYOURE DOING THIS WRONG OMG WHY DIDNT YOU ASK AHEAD OF TIME THIS WILL BE FUCKED UP FOREVERā š§#nothing wrong if you donāt give something a second thought because youāre so used to it. but I can and will ask about it and I donāt think I#really should feel bad about it if I donāt know enough to dispute it. idk#the other way around I try to be as specific as possible and word things in a way that people who might not get where Iām coming from will#understand. but the problem with that is my explanations tend to be lengthy and I lose them either way šæ#Im. trying to work on that using examples and stuff because they seem to work the best#but if I could write everything down on a word doc and beam it into your melon that would save both of us time and embarassment#im rambling the short version is I have adhd#yapping
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okay Iām annoying yk that and I know that.
I love to see what non bkdk shippers think will happen with the manga, bc this way I can learn and see things outside of my special interest for the chapters. And I was reading some interpretations of Ochako being weird in 425.
Some people are right here expecting izuku to go and support her. Some people saw him being this sad, yet only could think about him worrying about Ochakoās feelings over her fight, not Izukuās fight. they think this will lead to a beautiful confession, in which she cries how she couldnāt save himiko, that izuku noticed, and that heāll call her his hero and theyāll kiss. And I canāt help but feel like this is bc he is the boy. Because he is the boy in that ship, he is the one that supports, not gets supported. When I was reading those little scenarios, I thought they would explain deku would cry with her about his own fight and bond over it, or something like that. But noā¦ they believe dekuās strange reactions come from being worried over Ochako only. and itās so sad, to see how gender expectations are being pushed like that in something as simple as a āwhat I want to happen in the mangaā scenario. Itās sad how people think this is how it should work, when actually that would make me even sadder -as I said, for the most part I didnāt care about that ship, I accepted it as inevitable, but this isnāt fair. Romance irl is not perfect, but in a story for this to be a resolution when the character who hasnāt talked about his feeling keeps not talking about them and just supports her before confessingā¦
Even hetero relationships should have some balance, right?
EDIT:
someone brought up bkdk lmao. They explained how the confession from ochako could get answered: happy ending is izuku loving her back, bad ending is him saying he likes katsuki, and medium ending him liking mei. I canāt even lmao.
another person argued deli just has shown a brotherly bond with him (weird) and that he only thought of him at that dinner with the Im too blessed, and the last time he followed him was in season 1. people need to learn how to read, and connect the dots, literally. No matter how you see their relationship in canon as platonic or romantic (or queer platonic), itās clear their bond is strong and that Izuku depends on katsuki as much as katsuki depends on izuku on emotional levels -izuku losing control over and over and over again with him, AFO explaining he is the closest to midoriya, katsuki going towards him no matter how injured he is, looking for each other and the time stops, etc.
this is just canon. Thereās no arguing about it. Idk why intimate bonds between two male characters means they are like brothers. Is it bc if they are not related, thereās no way to not see it as gay?/gen but also /s
#grrr talking#I want to make another post about the ways Izu//ocha could have been developed easily#Like extremely easily#What was the reason to give the thing that was supposed to connect ochako to deku#To himiko and ochako#What was the reason to also make that connection an all might keychain which doesnāt hold any weight for her bc sheās not a huge am fan#Why having himiko grab that symbol they now share and cover it completely with her hand#Why not giving izuku another physical symbol of her#Why bringing up the childhood cards instead when we almost knew nothing about them#Why have them be explicitly connected to each other thru a dream they have to share together for it to be worth it#For bkdk to become friends again they didnāt need all of this#You donāt need to share your life n be connected to someone in order to become friends again#Or to atone for the bullying#They could have been shown working to be friends ever since the apology#And have small moments of them trying to just be that#And focus those big efforts into izu////ocha scenes#But no#we get this shit#Wtf#the contrast between Izuku reuniting with Katsuki vs with Ochako is a lot#N it could have been more implied the romance!#Like have him be surprised instead of just sad -it would show he notices she is acting weird n gets worried bc of it#Or have ochako show a bittersweet face like saying pls deku kun donāt make me say it now#So many options and yet#They donāt get disappointed bc itās a het ship n they believe that makes it canon#JUST LIKE WITH FUCKING TODO///MOMO LIKE ITS CUTE IDC BUT HOW CAN YOU THINK THAT MAKES SENSE FOR CANON#No problem with these fanon ships bUT WHEN THEY ACT LIKE THEY ARE REAL N THE REST R āDELUSIONALā
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i really do self sabotage when it comes to irl dating šš
#spilling tea like you guys are my irls#first of all iām chronically single#i dont do dating apps or casual sex (anymore. 2.5 years celibate by choice... which is a whole other story c: )#and second of all anytime anyone shows interest in me i am šāāļøšØ running away#even if theyāre cool#ššššš#i *am* the problem. THAT i know#thereās this person who iāve known for a very long time and they've been trying to take me out for a year#(very casually not pushy at all)#first time i said yes but my travelling got in the way. eventually we stopped talking but then we started again some time later#and when they asked to do something again - i got scared so told them i was sick (WHICH I WAS BUT HFJGJGJGJ IDK)#and THIS time he mentioned it again#and i umm didnāt respond until after 6 days#i know i know iām awful#but hereās the thing#IM TRAVELLING AGAIN#FOR A WHOLE MONTH THIS TIME#so if it even happens itāll be pushed back once more#but like i said we've known each other for a long time so it's always been brought up in a casual way. nothing that really screams DATE#although i can tell the tone of it is a lil more than friendly#iām just glad heās super nice and older than me (so he doesnāt rlly care about late replies and all that. usually when i respond late he#replies right away)#and we both keep ourselves busy with work#AND HE LIKES ANIME TOO LMFAO HE DRESSED UP AS SUKUNA ONCE#so like#i need to do better#šššš#commitment is scary DATING IS SCARY#i just donāt want to date until iāve achieved some personal goals but at the same time i donāt want to limit myself you know#HOWEVER i canāt have high expectations for my partner when i donāt have high expectations for myself
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very very personal, just insight into where im at w my family and things that bother me/have encouraged me to move out
"i know youre moving out so im just gonna say no ones kicking you out and if you feel like this is something you have to do then ok"
thanks! i know im not being kicked out! but yknow i kinda yet a weird vibe when your out of touch husband takes me to a cemetery to yell at me, tell me im just like my father/dont give my father "the time of day", and that im "mean to people who care about me" in front of his dead mother's grave in a poor attempt at guilting me out of speaking my mind. but no yeah thanks for stating the fucking obvious that im leaving on my own terms
#problems!#people seem to underestimate how quick i am to make moves#the job market is piss. cant believe yall two would blame me for being unemployed when all i do from rise to slumber is hound ppl for jobs#im not going to stay in a house where i will be 'scared straight'. that shit doesnt work on me. in fact it has the opposite effect#i respect yall even LESS now#and youre so so fucking lucky one of my goals for next year is to make things right with you it would be easy to cut you off forever#same way i did with my abusive transphobic dad.#my mom is someone i know can do better and can actually listen to reason instead of being stuck in her generation's mentality of#'x is easy if you just do y. you kids have it so easy the world is at your fingertips' blah blah fucking blah#i am autistic i do not keep jobs easily. i am trans jobs do not want me. i am black and perceived as a woman. every customer at all of my#past jobs thinks i am rude or mean or have an attitude when i do nothing but treat others the exact way i would want to be treated#customers dont like what i say? i stop talking. customers dont like when i dont talk? i talk to them. rinse repeat#like i know im the problem here but all of my problems circle back to my autism and the fact that because im not a supergenius or#someone whose special interest is capitalism i fail at every avenue i try to jam myself in.#but yeah no i need to work harder i need to be taken to a FUCKING CEMETERY and yelled at by YOUR HUSBAND for wanting to go to the bathroom#in front of his mothers grave. god rest her soul and yall know im no christian so i actually mean that shit#because in his mind all i want to do is smoke and party. when i smoke because i have fucking migraines and g to shows#(two out of three of them being free and for the purpose of their willingness to 'get me out of the house')#bc i like music and i like engaging w my scene. but no its all violent noise theres no actual purpose or activism behind moshing. nope#its just one big party right. im just wasting my time right. because i like sleepin on a couch every night with no doors to close. yep ok#anyway heres to me getting my meds getting the fuck out and being somewhat far from my scene now that im moving#hows that for smoking and partying all the time huh?#if any of yall read this i am so so sorry. bitching about my stepdad will become a thing i think#hes one of those bible thumpers that are totally boring and indifferent to differences around them and thinks my mom is just like him#in some ways? she is. but she is a people pleaser and will never take her wants or her feelings seriously#because she had the unfortunate upbringing in being brainwashed into thinking her feelings/wants are sinful#shoutout to my christian or catholic mutuals who are fucking normal and dont let some old fantasy novel control your life. peace#religion mention
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among the boundless billions zaniness like laugh track as it definitely has that moment of expressing "rolling my eyes as The Left makes a kerfuffle of Acting like they have a stance as a veneer over the true belief that [xyz] is cool & chill actually" like what, approximate 0.000% chance wendy isn't, as usual, given the Objective Stance of "yeah yeah ohh we are cancelling involved parties talking about how we Don't watch this But. we all love this damn epic movie & already have it memorized so shut the fuck up, kids today" like. don't wanna really delve into how much billions thinks taylor or anyone is "really" trans / nonbinary like not too much benefit of the doubt in this material including what does provide info abt that specifically
& the general like [head in hands. what do you think any of this could possibly be about (you're the one that made your show at all about Power)] of "yes, it's bad/wrong to be someone that someone has done something to / victim of something" like that to be anti misogyny All Women Must Be Epic Winners b/c there's something to be proved: that they don't Deserve to be victims (of misogyny), not taken as a Given. while when we see some epic winner men stepping on other men (who need not all be guaranteed Winners so as to say misogyny is wrong), that's often Good, well beyond any assumption that various forms of basic disrespect / violation / patterns of emergent/entrenched power difference as Bad (for being things done to people, not for there being people they're being done to), & generally billions has to take an extra step when ppl get shitted on & tell us the Specific Cases when it was undeserved actually & someone was being mean to a specific person who didn't deserve that. & the specific cases when hey guess it wasn't that bad(tm) or when hey It's Okay that you're someone something was done to, in this case. & tell us what we were supposed to know all along like when someone who something was being done to (wrong Of Them, whether b/c they inherently deserve it no matter what, &/or b/c they failed to be someone who could make it Impossible to do anything to them, which, how do you do that besides being The Authority / Superior yourself, exactly? nonrhetorically? what if the in group vs out group / fascism / authoritarianism protected Me?) was actually being treated Too Well b/c ah well the abuse meant you were getting any attention, maybe it meant you were claimed as any superior's property, maybe it meant you weren't Already disposed of, as all Losers were in the end, You're Welcome.
obviously referring to winston where it's spelled out all the abuse towards him was deserved, & More than he deserved in the case of rian having more access & taking advantage of that, all for billions' enjoying its own sendoff there of, again, maximizing violation & violence short of [real violence is physical & leaves bruises / draws blood / Literally kills] which would be distasteful in general But doesn't it make wags look like the winner & winston the loser is that the former's completely unrelated completely impersonal ego blow gets way amplified taken out on winston, the most vulnerable recurring character when spyros as [first & ultimate Everyone Hates Him role] is more entrenched in there & billions still magnanimously pities tuk, as it does winston too, just not quite as much. again that like completely surface level realized power fantasy of forcing the mirror up to the Inferior so they're like nooo my inferiorityyyy & in doing so like, the projection in that lmao, we get it re: the valuing of & need(tm) for such Power Tripping & Reaffirming My Superiority & My Ego Restored; Everyone Claps like good god. & then for all ben & tuk are the slightly softer Two Too Nice Boys duo to the rian & winston quant duo, also like too nice i guess but not as much, ben is in charge of tuk but Any instance of rian being in charge of winston outstrips them in that "yay interpersonal abuse" dynamic, like then in the end billions may be like "yeah it's possible to be mean to them unlike how being mean to winston is actually Nice b/c he deserves everything he gets, we only vicariously enjoy it vs Feeling Bad for tuk & ben sometimes (still magnanimously & it's Not That Bad / just goofin)" like ben & tuk still Fail by not being people it's impossible to do anything to. & not Exceptions who anyone is really being Too Mean to. like if they were women, in which case, no problem surely with a "positive" kind of victim blaming where there is something Inherent that Will be victimized so hey how about to cancel that out there's this special Paternal Protection you Need always, Or Else? :) but instead they are men who are asian & is ben gay & w/tuk & winston nobody mentions glasses or fatness but billions doesn't really do much or very in depth textual mentioning of Anything, even w/nonzero mention that there may be gender & race in this world. a gay man, once. no disability. we just Know who are the inferiors who deserve it when they're treated inferiorly, or if they don't, they start deserving it when they fail to stop/avoid it, but if you start mentioning the factors behind who we all totally agree is inferior like whoa nobody was Saying any of that? being the real agent of oppression on the basis of the factors only You spelled out, much? nonbinary? i never say anything about the Gender Binary when i'm subscribing to it, sounds like You've created & enforced it. obfuscation & deflection onto [so Just Normal nobody has to label, explain, or argue it] couldn't serve a purpose & protect the existing power differences as they are. maybe You're the problem? perhaps you brought it upon yourself & now you're causing too much trouble standing up for yourself while everyone else's criticism is laser focused on you as the prior & continuing negative actions done to you are taken as a given / unquestioned / covertly protected to overtly encouraged?
anyway so wild if the Completely Normal(tm) Victim Blaming is uncritically recreated & oft embraced for "if you're watching this & don't wish you were axe / find him appealing" [billions as a sequence of vicarious power trips] purposes in this series....but a bit wild considering like this is your multiseason show that wasn't just purporting to be those power trips for [enough demographic & apparently specific personal tastes overlap w/creators] & was at all purporting to question the matters of power at play in the material, or yknow, at least to not be completely superficial material while said material is textually & thematically all about power difference being leveraged, how, the consequences, & so on. thus i will have to intermittently talk about it forever like this like lord unbelievable. & the funny little & sometimes less funny less little characters it has trapped in there so that those of us who were never meant to be in the audience can be cursed with this knowledge. like i have some feedback. "imagine not victim blaming" & "imagine adjusting your perspective can go beyond superficial layers added to politely defer to some other ppl while they're present but really like cmon do they deserve that. am i not just saying what we're allll thinking"
#another random night another Verbal Effusion of [forehead to hand]#winston billions#who needs actual questions about power or the consequences of getting to consider others Lessers & acting accordingly#when we can last minute be like uh wendy is god actually. take it away wendy (wait she just does whole other shit half the season)#okay Now take it away wendy i guess b/c the series is dead set on you being the Moral Center#if mostly b/c gosh everyone either loves owning you as pseudo wife or correctly recognizes & defers to your superiority#the scene i couldn't bear to sit through at the start of s7 way too long sequence of wendy Going To Work to the ''cuz im awesome'' song#i was like. lol. i was like okay that is wendy's mood / perspective then. Wrong. it was billions conveying Fact to the audience. rip#abt as great setup for ''the only other shoe that finally dropped was that of Yeah It's This Completely Surface Level'' as possible (:#prince has exactly the same attitudes & actions as wendy does? uh well you see. it's just bad when he does it#if only more wendys were in charge. if only we go ''well even if it's bad if wendy does it? or axe or whoever? Could Be Worse''#nothing to analyze in the [but at least it's not worse] dead end re: justification of Power Leveraging & minimization of its consequences#tl;dr just the victim blaming embraced everywhere & the idea that everything that Deviates from the Norm Too Ethically Mindedly#is just that veneer slapped on overtop of [haha but truly: the norm] like no but seriously we all know It's Not That Deep(tm)#even for the characters written to exercise this [my Extra Mile Ethics] trait regularly it's expressed as this Polite Addendum#to the [what's Really at play] normal. the And Enbies tacked on; that's that on that & it Is an extra veneer to the norm#prince asking if taylor's changing up their pronouns; no more Meant a red flag than him immediately shitting on winston i'm sure#yet yknow why tf suppose taylor more than anyone else would Change Pronouns. taylor who the series also only ever shows as being#misgendered As A Woman. whose drag / cisguise As A Woman is not treated in the same way a man's would be / is#whose emotive / expressive affect isn't either. billions like [the genders are m/f] to [perhaps also amab/afab] Tacked On#as something politely Extra you do to their face that doesn't actually change (threaten) your idea of what's just Normal & True#like it's normal & true that ugh god don't you hate the autistic people around you? don't you wish you could go sicko mode on them#so that they couldn't be around you anymore & they'd have brought it upon themself & really it was good of you b/c The Group Cohesion#thanks you & b/c you just gave them free ABA? yes yep Surely Unquestionably#problem isn't abuse & concomitant violation in & of itself. it's Bad to be someone that's done to. we will announce Exceptions#rest of you either you brought it upon yourself or you failed to Correct that you're not someone who inherently deserves it#that is: someone who just can & will Stop It if done to them. well so you see winston pushing back is ignored or treated to further#backlash & then he withdraws (expression of his experience / creation of a consequence which tells the other Stop Doing This)#&/or otherwise conveys displeasure / being hurt (same as before. ''uh well push back / express xyz'' ppl did & were steamrolled/ignored)
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sometimes..so.etimes they change something even after the premiere. sp you appear and watch an entirely new and prolonged monologue. and it's like. FUCK YEAH.
#me showing up at the theatre: be normal be normal be normal be normal be no#me realising they added some things and it adds a lot of characerisation: BE NORMAL BE NORMAL BE NORMAL BE NORMAL BE NORMAL BE NORMAL!!!!!#(misson failed but at least i was Quiet lmao)#the fun thing about seeing this several times tho is that by now ive stopped trying to figure out the plot#bc i Know the plot by now and i can speak along to a decent portion of lines#so now i focus not on what they mean but what exactly they say in any moment#i notice all the small irrelevant lines that still add so much to the characters voices and dynamics#its sooooo fun#and sometimes its also just really funny#'hell do good' 'didnt you just talk to him? the fuck he will. that man cant even pretend to have any self control'#i mean she was RIGHT#my man is out here being such a miserable little fuck being dramatic about his problems#if he could get a grip on himself for like five minutes everyone could have lived! idiot <3#AND THE OTHER GUY#if you had just KEPT AWAY instead of Walking Up To Your Murderer and distracred them for like. a few minutes longer IT WOULD ZAVE WORKED#like yeah youd still be dead BUT THAT WAS THE POINT WASNT IT#LIKE THIS YOU JUST DIED FOE NOTHING#YOUE BUDDY DIES TOO BC YOU GOT YOURSELF MURDERED TOO SOON. idiot#ill be honest. if they had kissed (and if youd seen rhe way they LOOK at each other) things might have actually gone well#im convinced of this#i have Textual Evidence#anyway. i should read the og play and find out if its the play or just the actors#like do the characters actually constantly refer to each other as 'my [name/title]' or did the theatre make it even gayer themselves#ik the actors are doing it on purpose anyway. that is Not coincidence#a biscuit's rambles
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