#a very kind smile
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twelvedimensional · 7 months ago
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congratulations to the doctor for his first kiss since his wife got trapped inside a computer
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hinamie · 3 months ago
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in spite of everything, I had fun <3
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shalom-iamcominghome · 3 months ago
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I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.
This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.
This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.
But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.
I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.
I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.
I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.
I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#abuse tw#i am not sharing this for the sake of pity and i also ask not to be told to divulge my abuse story. that isn't relevant#i have been needing to engage with this topic for a long time though and judaism has helped me a bit in navigating healing#but i decided to share this publicly in the hopes it will help other survivors specifically of familial/parental abuse#i know how it feels (in general). it's so lonely and you can really harbor (understandable) baggage about this particular commandment#i have a meeting with My Rabbi (sponsoring rabbi) and i might bring this up. we've only spoken once face-to-face (zoom)#so that might be really Intense to bring up to him but he is very kind and i trust him (which is why he is My Rabbi)#and he has already told me that he WANTS me to wrestle with g-d and His word *with* him#again i am posting this publicly so i can document my thoughts and keep them straight but also with the hope it MIGHT help others#if it even *casually* inspires another survivor i will feel so grateful (though it is THEIR achievement and not mine to claim)#i want us to survive. i want us to eat well. i want us to smile#i will say that this must be a very sudden whiplash in tone from my last post about sex. from sex to awful horrific abuse#my stream of consciousness is just Like This though in the sense that i have very sudden realizations and tonal whiplashes#so you're just getting a very frank look into how my brain is structured and what my brain thinks are important enough to think about#if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*
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unriding · 1 month ago
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me n moze say good morning to the world !!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
art by @rabbbitseason of course <3
#🐦‍⬛🐕 .#<-#hehe i took inspo from kai’s rb of my mb:>#MY FIRST MOEVIE COMM#this is queued#im asleep (at least i should be by the time this is posted) but it’s a mystery as to how i will fall asleep knowing i would have to#close my eyes and not actively stare at this for the rest of my life#full factory reset i really don’t know what i would even say to this 🥹 im just#things i would do for bitti : anything! i cannot think of something i wouldn’t do for her#i gave her the most cursed ref known to mankind and she came up with this im so 🥹 thank you so much … your art blows me away every time ….#i may pass out seeing him in your style … the way you did his hands and he’s so big#this is me -> ໒꒰ྀི o̴̶̷̤ ̯o̴̶̷̤ ꒱ྀི১ at this HSJDNCN aaaaaa 🥹#i will also state the very obvious and say that bitti is such a pleasure to work with ajsnxnkck ….. please im on my knees#when i saw this- my stomach literally flipped inside out and my ears were ringing .. and my heart was beating a million beats per second#if bitti’s comms were open for eternity & i won the lottery- i would commission so many mozes ….. the world would be full of bitti’s mozes.#^ though that sounds terrible for bitti … im so sorry#i swear that won’t happen i would never do that to you#he is sooooo yum in your style (severe & outrageous understatement)#but what i can do is stare at this all day#THANK YOU BITTI UEUEJJSJS 🥹🥹🥹 I HOPE UR PILLOWS R ALWAYS COLD !!!#not even aventurine’s shield can protect me from the 100000000 damage i took from this /pos#such a shield doesn’t exist in the hsr realm or the real world !!!#evie.ss#IM KIND OF ANGRY THAT I KNOW THERES NOTHING I CAN SAY TO EXPRESS HOW I FEEL !!!!! WHAT COULD I SAY >:#WHAT AN ODD FEELING WHERE I AM reduced to my knees but from positive emotions alone …#im so dizzy /pos let me stop here this is already so long omg 🥹#edit: dude /gn my screen time is gonna skyrocket because im still staring with such a dopey smile on my face ahsndnxkc gosh im happy :’) th#thank you so much bitti …. this means so much to me#i literally can not put into words how much this has made my entire year :’)) im so soft im so happy
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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 3 months ago
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One of my favourite things from the aftermath of the PTs plan: whatever these silly doodles are. I remember them from the very beginning of the game too, with the plan against Kamoshida. I so badly want to know who drew these, because it was either Ren or Ryuji, and either option is incredibly funny to me.
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dr-cruces · 1 year ago
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Some little white lies can be quite nice and make someone feel useful, like saying you can't quite get the clasp.
close-ups under cut
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senseearly · 8 months ago
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For a moment, imagine yourself in Mithrun's brother shoes.
Your brother - stronger, prettier, more charismatic, but also distrustful and disdainful of everyone especially you - is to be sent to the Canaries. It is the rule, it is the duty of all noble houses. But you know what goes on there, Mithrun knows what happens there. Yet you see him off, bidding a temporary farewell as you do, because someone from the House has to go and it won't be definitely you. Mithrun knows this, you know this. And you wonder, very briefly, if Mithrun hates you now more than he does already.
Your brother - powerful, agile, a good soldier just as he is as an heir, if he could only be an heir - suddenly disappears. The unit he belonged to suddenly disappeared. And you're speechless because - how? why? No one wants to answer you; they will instead try to bring back a body, they promise to you. But that is not what you want. You grieve for your brother. but your own family doesn't grieve with you. Wasn't Mithrun family too?
Then you found out: MIthrun is alive.
Your brother - now weak, despondent, his eyes always looking for something that is not here nor there - is to be sent home where people can take care of him. It is not your first choice, you want him home. But he is - sick. Not quite there. He needs someone who can look after him and you look at yourself - your gait, your constitution - and you know it can't be you. So, you follow the advice of your family and pour out all your resources to find him the best of healers and caretakers. You ask yourself, almost daily, if Mithrun would ever return to who he once was.
Your brother - strong, pretty, uninterested of anything and anyone else aside from what he calls 'the demon' - is now better. He can walk on his own now, eats without throwing up on himself. The color on his skin is back and the scars of his injuries have faded into thick bumps and discolored skin. But he still isn't quite there; still needs help and probably will for the rest of his life. And you can live with that. You can provide that. Just as long as he comes home.
But doesn't. Your brother - now a husk of his former self, and you hate thinking of him that way, but you can't help yourself, the Mithrun you knew is gone - runs straight back to the Canaries. His mission is not over, he says. He doesn't care how long it takes, he says. And you see him off, again, because someone from the House has to go and it still can't be you. Mithrun knows this, you know this, and you can't help but wish, very briefly, if things would've been different if you went instead of him.
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nartothelar · 4 months ago
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So I'm not familiar at all with soul eater (though it is on my to-watch list), is madness an actual disease? Like it has physical symptoms? Or is it just a mental one? And on that note, can you recover from it? Are there consequences to being mad, like death or something else that's permanent?
Sorry for all the questions, I'm just really curious,,,
No worries! I actually really like the concept of madness (if you couldn’t already tell sksks)
So madness is “a non-magical force possessed by every living being in the world that influences behavior”. This force is innate but it’s quantity in a living being varies from person to person, with some beings able to amplify it or share their own madness with others!
In high quantities has a lot of special effects, such as causing illusions and jamming signals, but most notably it influences a person’s behavior and usually in a destructive manner (ie. making you reckless, not feel pain, ect).
Still, it can also be used a a sort of power boost, that is, as long as you don’t let it consume you and get lost to it :)c
Lastly, there is no real cure for it, but you can recover from it if you’re not fully consumed by it (there are also anti demon wavelengths that some people possess that can help counter madness! Which ingo possesses!)
But yeah! There’s more to it but that’s the jist of it!
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khawlat · 9 months ago
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mikentosh · 12 days ago
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"it's me!"
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cassidy fnaf doodle thing
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x
alt versions also something showing the layers yes i know merging some of them wold've been helpful But i like to make things difficult for myself. So
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twelvedimensional · 7 months ago
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incredibly weird episode that to my surprise has knocked out "boom" as my favorite of the season so far. some very scattered thoughts below:
"hey what if we had another dr-lite episode? what if sally sparrow was a supercilious spoiled brat?" - writer of this episode, probably
what LAYERS this ended up having. walked into it expecting a thinly veiled metaphor for "kids these days and their devices," ended up with a thinly veiled metaphor for "everyone these days and their devices and the echo-chamber bubbles they create for themselves that blind them to the real world injustices (and killer slugs) and enforce an artificial homogeneity."
from the start i clocked how White everyone in finetime seemed to be but at first i just brushed it off as the bbc making poor casting choices. then came the loaded statement of "don't worry, he's not as stupid as he looks." and then and then and then. did not expect that to be a plot point but my god. a busload of rich kids in the prime of youth lobbed at an "untamed" land to send resources back home? very uh, colonizer indeed (albeit an interestingly imperfect metaphor for colonization, leaving out those from less-wealthy backgrounds who seized the apparent opportunity colonization offered them to seize and claim land and status for their own)
how many times this season has the "villain" turned out to be "ai/computer/device that is supposed to help you now turning against you"? space babies, boom, dot and bubble makes 3/5 so far? not sure if this is meant to be a Thread. stretching it more broadly to "someone/something you trust turning against you" this encompasses 73 yards too (the way everyone turns away from Ruby after the old woman following her speaks!). that said the devil's chord bucks this pattern so i might just be reaching.
i can't make heads nor tails of ricky september but it was wildly amusing how he seemed to almost show up out of a different genre. the presumably heroic pop star who's Not Like The Rest Of The Milieu -- he turns off his dot! he reads in his apartment! he's different and flouts rules in a way that makes him more desirable -- not different in the way that makes the people of finetime look down on the doctor. and oh, swoon, he tries to protect lindy from the ugly truth of everyone on homeworld being dead, oh, he tries to protect lindy from dot until lindy throws him to the metaphorical wolves. because if you are lindy pepper-bean, if you think you are better, most worthy of being saved -- of course you would, even to someone as within the norm as you.
the fact that the doctor couldn't even get INTO finetime -- i have to wonder, is it that the technology protecting finetime from the outside is SO adept at its inbaked racism it could even keep the tardis out? horrifying!
throughout the episode i was also wondering at how mystifyingly patient the doctor was being with these people. by twenty minutes in i was waiting for him to chew lindy out for being so stupid, so narrow-minded, so resistant to self reliance. we've seen the doctor do this before -- it's not the first time they've tried to save someone utterly intentionally inept or someone hostile to them, it's not the first time he would have yelled at a human for being a "stupid ape!". but i wonder now, with all these pieces in mind -- did the doctor realize from the start that finetime was biased against him? was he playing that deferential balancing act marginalized people often feel they have to resort to in an environment dead set against them? listen to me right now, I'm not a threat to you or your view of the world. i just need you to listen to me right now.
and of course the doctor keeps on trying to save them because the doctor always has hope that people can change, even the most awful ones. it could have been possible for even some of the people of finetime to recognize the cruelty of the sort of society they'd built, the biases that have been entrenched in them. it's possible for all of us to realize these things. but finetime says no. finetime says, thanks for saving us. finetime says, that was your duty. and finetime says, fuck you.
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ryllen · 1 year ago
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#mtas#my time at sandrock#mtas wei#mtas builder#fanart#i found my true love target ; v ;#the smiling type is the ones that truly snatch my heart#they bring me the utmost joy#as much ironic it is unsuur makes me unsure of the rest of the stage after confession#i just thought i marry him in case the builder parents come and there would be some kind of scene over it like in portia#till the very last minute my heart was somehow still half in about it#tho in the game unsuur is read very close as 'unsure' i actually pronounce it differently bcs it's close to something in my language#unsur : means element; i thought that's nice bcs it feels closely to rock related thing#https://translate.google.com/?sl=id&tl=en&text=unsur&op=translate#if anyone even interest the slightest on how it sounds when pronounced by me here's the google translate link#but yea i'm dying that it is literally being pronounced 'unsure'#pls help him he just needs to be given a chance to command so he can learn to do independent thinking from experience#like yeah probably there would be lots of mistake at first#but u're like a mom justice who decides everything for the child so when u ask the child they just be like don't know ask mom fshdshd#he needs to be put out there#or had that been done justice if so i am sorry ; v ;#but seriously i'm dying when i kept adventuring with justice and logan and unsuur was just told to wait like a puppy fhsdh#he needs to be taught how to decide things by himself seriously#it's honestly hard to write unsuur's character#like no matter how u tried somehow it doesn't feel as close as funny or as serious deadpan like the original#wei here is like a piece of white paper i can scribble whatever i want#it's unexpected#but i ended up liking wei
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bijoumikhawal · 3 months ago
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rewatched the wire. The things that stuck out to me this time were Truly, how Into Each Other's Personal Space these two are so quickly (particularly when Garak falls to his knees in his quarters and Julian immediately is kneeling in front of him- their knees had to have been touching), and the way Julian is both very bossy and soft spoken, and the softness of his speech doesn't take away from the authority he exercises. Also, how genuinely fucking cocky he is towards Tain, like this is a PTA mom and not. The retired head of a black ops intelligence agency. I'm sure I've noted it before but it's truly jawdropping to witness. You don't even have backup, my man.
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lesiasmadness · 5 days ago
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THIS GAME IS GOING TO KILL ME DEAD
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cyellolemon · 5 months ago
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Red color
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maximura · 1 year ago
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