So, for today, you get some fluffly and comforting imagine. It is about Natasha helping reader to cut her hair. It is just a sweet moment between the two so I hope you will enjoy it <3
! Warning — mentions of past physical abuse.
"Are you sure you want to do it?" she asks for the second time.
If she seems to hesitate, you do not. You silently nod, giving the woman the sign that she can start cutting, and she sighs. It is not that she doesn't want to do it — it is not her decision to make anyway — but she is concerned. You have that look on your face, one that screams—: "I am not feeling well and I would do anything to get a bit relief, even if I might regret it later."
She is happy to be here for you, she wants to support you, but she is not sure of what is happening because you won't talk, and it worries her. When she entered the room, you simply gave her the scissors with that order of cutting your hair. You haven't even looked at her once and, everytime she tries to meet your eyes in the mirror, you look away. You do not want the woman to see the sadness they are holding because you do not want her to guess what is happening.
You know that she will be aware of everything the second she sees your eyes. She is a spy, she is good at reading people, to guess their secrets without them having to talk. You can tell, by the way she is hesitating that she already has an idea of what might be on your mind right now. Anger, sadness, pain. She saw it in your puffy eyes, and your pursed lips.
"Yes," you say when she doesn't move, "do it. Now," and your demand sounds almost as an order, your tone being firm. You need her to do it now because you can't stand the way your hair are caressing your shoulders any more.
Some people say that hair hold memories, and you need a fresh start.
Today, during your mission, some agent pulled you by the hair. He grabbed your pony tail to hold you back. You usually do not wear a pony tail, your hair always tied into a bun to prevent that kind of thing to happen during a fight. Yet, today you did not, because you were just supposed to pcik up some files with your team.
He thought that he was better than you are, than he knew best, and he could not stand that a woman might be smarter than he is. So, when you walked past him, he did not find a better thing to do than to grab your hair to hold you back because he was too stupid to deal with his anger as grown adult.
Your dad used to do the same. That is the problem, all these memories that came back to your mind when you felt his grip. Your dad used to do the same whenever he was angry at you for whatever reason. He would drag you to your room, and lock you there. He would throw you on the ground, just so he could hit you. He held you the same way the day he threw you out of the house.
Since you came back from the mission, you could not shake the memory of your mind out of your mind. You just realized how much your past have been hauting you despite how much you are pretending to be fine.
You have found yourself with the urge of getting rid of your hair, just to make sure that no one could ever grab you that way again. Yet, you were unable to do it on your own. You have been standing in front of the bathroom's mirror for half an hour with those stupid scissors in your hand, and you still haven't made a move when the woman entered the room.
You didn't let her a chance to ask question, and you immediately gave her the scissors with the silent demand that she cuts your hair. You want it to be done, but it felt like a step that was a bit too big to be taken alone.
When the moment eventually came, you closed your eyes. You do not want to watch while she is doing it because you might regret it, and that is the last thing you want. At first, you can feel her fingers running throught your hair, and then your heard it, the sound of the scissors cutting throught it. A few minutes later, your head felt a lot lighter than it used to be, strands of your hair now covering the ground.
"I am all done, milaya," she whispers, pressing soft kisses on your temple to encourage you to open your eyes. "Are you okay?" she asks, and you both laugh when your eyes meet in the mirror because your new hair cut is definitely hideous, and your tips uneven, but you have never felt so well in your life.
38 notes
·
View notes
please don't say you love me
in which fwb!spencer reid and fem!reader get into an argument about the nature of their relationship.
18+ (implied intimacy)
warnings/tags: friends with benefits arrangement, it goes bad, reader is so clearly anxious avoidant, reader is so me-coded, self-loathing, difficulties with emotional intimacy, arguing, derek and penelope make an appearance woo, a little dramatic, no happy ending (a nereidprinc3ss first!)
a/n: it happened guys I stopped writing for a few days and last night randomly was inspired to finish this fwb piece and it essentially turned into a vent and went a completely different direction than i thought it would but here we are!!! i hope you enjoy, I loved writing, ilysm
“Are you reading it? Did you get to the part yet?” You ask, buzzing as you peer around Spencer’s arm to see where he’s at in the book you’d handed him. Sometimes you think it takes him longer to flip the pages than to read them.
He doesn’t answer, but you see the flickering quirk of his lip like something is amusing him. It’s been a few minutes and he’s maybe halfway through. He has to have seen it by now.
You’re clinging to his arm, eyes darting pointlessly between the text and his face, searching for a reaction. It comes in the form of a furrowed brow, a disbelieving smile, and something between a barking laugh and an exclamation of, “what?”
“You read it?”
His eyes narrow and he flips back a page, taking a bit longer to reevaluate.
“Our moans and grunts drowned out the screams of the dead and dying only a few hundred feet away.”
You giggle furiously, clapping a hand to your mouth when you snort, and you feel Spencer’s focus shifting to you, even with your eyes screwed shut.
“And you read this whole series?”
At that you sober up some, still hiding the bottom half of your face and brows drawn sorrowfully as mirthful tears well. You’re slow to admit your guilt with a nod, and his expression is somewhere between horror and fascination.
Your cheeks heat and you cover your face, laughing again and shaking your head shamefully as he ridicules you.
“Why? Why would you do that to yourself? I don’t even know if I can be seen in public with you, that’s—” he’s haphazardly tossed the book back on its display table and grabbed your wrists, pulling gently and laughing too. “No, show me your face. This is—you need to explain yourself. This is unforgivable.”
“No! I swear it was a morbid curiosity, I didn’t like it, I’m sorry! I—”
“Reid?”
You both freeze.
It’s not the most dignified position, admittedly—hidden among the shelves in a bookstore, pressed too close to be friendly, his hands around your wrists.
So you don’t mind when he drops them like hot potatoes and gives you a few inches of breathing room.
“Hey! Uh—you’re—”
Spencer is looking between you and two other people at the end of the aisle—a quirky bespectacled blonde in a flouncy polka-dot dress and her taller companion, ripped and head shaved, sporting some impressive eyebrows. Right now they’re conspicuously raised—his eyes are also pinballing between you and Spencer.
For a moment, everyone is just sort of… looking at each other.
It’s a little bit… awful?
Finally Spencer clears his throat.
“Um, what are you guys doing here? Just… looking at books?”
Something is off, and you feel like shrinking or running, but you just stay glued to your spot.
In sync, they hold up copies of the same book—and it takes you not a second to place the author’s name, in imposing red font at the bottom like it’s important. Rossi.
The pieces click into place. These must be Spencer’s co-workers—Penelope and Derek, if his descriptions of the team have served you well. Part of you is starstruck. Part of you is embarrassed. They’re clearly shocked to see Spencer with a girl in the wild, so you know he hasn’t told them about you—and why should he, you think, why should he tell his friends about the girl he’s been sleeping with for months now?
Finally, the blonder half of the duo speaks.
“You’re—this is a girl. That’s. Who is that? Hi! Who are you?”
She’s literally pointing at you, eyes drifting between you and Spencer like it just doesn’t make any sense. Derek gives her a look and gently pushes her hand down.
“Hey. That’s enough.” Then he offers you a polite smile, though you sense a bit strained, and his eyes too keep wandering back to the man next to you. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“No, no! You’re not… interrupting…” Spencer trails off and you sense he’s looking at you and gauging a reaction but you’re just smiling idly at his friends and waiting for this to be over. He finally thinks to introduce you by name, and you offer a shy wave and a smile to your new acquaintances.
Penelope points (that damn finger again) but this time it’s less accusatory, and stays below chin level.
“Cool shirt. I love that band,” she offers genially. Your brows raise and you look down, trying to remember what shirt you’d tossed on before leaving Spencer’s apartment an hour ago.
“Oh! Thanks,” you smile, and you’re relieved to mean it this time.
Another frosty silence begins to descend, but Derek doesn’t let it settle so much this time, to everyone’s satisfaction.
“Alright, well. It was nice to meet you. Enjoy your date.”
There’s too much weight on the last sentence, and Derek gives Spencer a eyebrows-raised-meaningfully look you don’t understand. You’re just glad Spencer keeps his mouth shut and doesn’t immediately insist that it’s not a date, because it’s not, and that’s fine, but the vehement denial would bum you out.
The pair walk away in the kind of clenched silence that means they’ll start fervently whispering as soon as they are out of ear shot. You watch their retreating figures and chew your lip, sensing that the carefree and playful energy of five minutes ago will have evaporated by the time you turn back to face your companion.
“Strange,” you murmur, mostly to yourself, and you’re slightly jarred when Spencer replies from beside you.
“Which part?”
All of it.
Turning to face him, you smile, and it doesn’t reach your eyes but it doesn’t need to.
“Oh—nothing, sorry.”
For a moment, he doesn’t respond, only stares at a point somewhere above your head and narrows his eyes like he’s thinking unpleasant thoughts.
“Was I an asshole, to you, just now?”
It’s unexpected. You don’t have an answer prepared, so you say something that feels like a lie because you can’t prove that it’s not the truth.
“I don’t think so. Why?”
“I just… I don’t know. I get weird around them, sometimes. I don’t always know what to say, like, when my personal life and my work life intersect, because for a long time I didn’t really have a personal life. And I think they still think I don’t know how to talk to girls, so…”
“You don’t know how to talk to girls,” you remind him. “Let’s go look at the puzzles.”
Maybe you spend too much time with Spencer Reid. Maybe that’s the problem—too long in his presence and he’s eating away at your neural tissue like you’ve got cysticercosis and he’s the T. solium (a terrible thing he had explained to you a few weeks ago.)
Maybe you need a break from him, to stop breathing his air and sleeping in his bed and wearing his clothing, because you’re forgetting that he’s not the entire world and that is a very bad thing to forget in a situation like yours. The entire world cannot be the size of his apartment.
But you also just like him so much. As a friend, of course. That goes without saying. You like his strange sense of humor, and the way he lights up when you ask him an obscure question. You like your legs across his lap while you watch his old shows. You also like being kissed by him, and hugged by him. You like being taken care of like no one has ever taken care of you, and you like the way he always touches you, soft and kind and so on purpose.
You never meant to like him so much.
This affection—it has grown, insidious and parasitic, and now that it’s been pointed out to you like a lump in your side, it’s impossible to ignore.
What you and Spencer have works precisely because you’ve kept things platonic and casual. That way, there’s no worrying about emotional baggage or arguing about feelings because there are none to be found and no precedent that any such things should or need to occur. You can’t hurt each other’s feelings if your feelings aren’t on the table.
So why can’t you stop thinking about earlier?
Why can’t you help caring that he’s been keeping you a secret from the people he loves most?
“So, essentially the book is his first deep dive into meta-fiction. It was pretty revolutionary at the time, and while not his most celebrated novel, I’d argue it was his most relevant and culturally pervasive. I’d actually love to hear your interpretation of the story—it’s truly different for everyone. It’s a little like… like a literary Rorschach test. Do you wanna borrow it?”
You’re a tangle on his bed—arms, legs, sheets—it’s hard to tell where you end and he begins. All you’re sure of is his hand, tracing his fingers in chaste lines, feather-light up and down your inner thigh in the way he knows you like. Usually it’s so soothing you melt and fall asleep within minutes. Right now it’s only stoking some sparking electrical fire in your chest—the buzzes and bursts from which have you on edge. Ready to cave in at any second. You wish you could relax. You’ve been trying.
Spencer is in no hurry for you to respond, and so doesn’t seem to mind when it takes you a long while to find your answer.
“I think I need to go home.”
It comes out too scratchy, as you haven’t really spoken for several hours. Not as casual as you were going for. He angles his head down toward you and his hand stops and you realize it’s actually worse like that.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah! Everything is fine, I just… I wanna sleep in my own bed tonight, I think.”
It’s late and you shouldn’t be making him drive you across town, but he’s always amenable to what you want. This is the longest you’ve ever stayed at his place, after all—a rare long weekend—and before that a few weeks had passed with no cases to speak of, during which time you’ve been staying with him more and more. Spencer seems to be completely content letting you eat his food and use his shower if it means you don’t leave.
“I know the feeling well,” he admits, and your heart twinges with the care he takes to not bump or bend you or pull your hair as he shifts. He’s already been out of bed, and so is more dressed than you. Really, most people on the planet are more dressed than you, and you pull his nice sheet higher up your chest as he sits on the edge of the mattress, looking down at you and with a sort of worry in his eyes. He finds your knee through the fabric. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’ve been quiet.”
Stop paying such close attention, you want to tell him. And in the same breath, please don’t ever look away.
“I’m… good.”
It is easily the least convincing performance of your life. Either you’re self sabotaging or you want him to push you further, and you don’t know which is worse.
When his brow ramps just the slightest bit, you know you’ve fumbled it.
“I don’t believe you.”
You shrug. “I don’t need you to.” And then you sit up, still holding the sheet to your chest. “Can you hand me a shirt?”
Enough clothing has accumulated around the room recently that he could pretty much reach out in any direction and find something for you to wear. He grabs a sweatshirt hanging from the bedpost and holds it out for you, and you pull it over your head, before dropping your feet onto the cool wooden floor and grabbing the first bottoms you see—a pair of floral pajama shorts. How have so many of your clothes ended up at his apartment?
“Is there anything I can do to help?”
You scoop your bag up from a chair and flit around the room, haphazardly stuffing away discarded clothing to take back home. It’s true that it’ll be nice to get back to your stuff—your shower products and your closet and your silk pillow cases. You shouldn’t be spending so much time here. It’s not your space and you’ve been sacrificing your own needs to be closer to him, which is something you’d rather not do for any man.
“You can drive me home. I’ll send you gas money.”
“You don’t need to send me gas money,” he says, tacking your name on to the end of the sentence in a way that raises your hackles instantly.
“Yeah, I do. You drive me around constantly. I’ll pay you back and start taking the metro, or something.”
“I don’t want your money,” he scoffs.
“Fine. Then I’ll call a car.”
“That’s unnecessary. I’m happy to drive you.”
“Why?”
Silence hangs. Spencer has by this point stood up, and he’s watching you with a furrowed brow and slightly parted lips like he doesn’t understand where this animosity has come from. Honestly, you’re not entirely sure either. You didn’t realize you were harboring so much of it.
“Am I supposed to see you as an inconvenience?”
“I’m not your responsibility.”
“No. You’re not. We have a relationship and I don’t mind doing things for you.”
“You’re not my boyfriend.”
You didn’t mean to say it, but you sure as hell were thinking it.
It feels good to say, like stretching a sore muscle beyond its limits or pressing into a bruise until you get past the ache. Sometimes when things hurt, it’s best to feel the pain and move on.
He looks absolutely perplexed, the lines between his brows only ditching deeper.
“Is that what this is about?”
“Oh my god, Spencer, no, I don’t care—”
“Because earlier at the bookstore I asked you if I was being an asshole and—”
“I do not give a fuck about earlier at the fucking bookstore!”
It’s too late to be yelling, but he doesn’t scold you. He just sort of looks at you, like you’re something mildly unpleasant. It makes you feel worse.
A long moment goes by.
“Fine. I’ll take you home.”
You let him brush past you, nothing more than a breeze on your shoulders as he disappears from the darkened bedroom. For a moment, you can’t follow him. All you can do is stand there and try to contain that sour, stinging, crying feeling in your eyes and nose because there’s no reason for you to be crying right now.
From the living room, he calls, rather abrasively, “Are you coming?”
“Yes,” you huff, and it is as wavering as it is insolent, so obviously the only word holding back a full-fledged deluge of tears.
One minute. One minute to sniffle and take deep breaths and wipe abashedly under your eyes because you refuse to be dramatic about this. Refuse to get over-emotional. You will not let it matter this much to you.
When you decide you can show your face without making a scene, you march out of his bedroom and straight past where he’s leaning against the kitchen counter, keys in hand, to the front door.
He doesn’t move. You burn smoking holes into the dark wood of the door with your eyes, and the two of you are apparently at an impasse.
“I’m ready,” you eventually snap, always the impatient one between the two of you, casting a sharp glance over your shoulder.
“I’m not.”
“You said you would—”
“I know what I said,” Spencer cuts you off and shuts you up, “and I changed my mind. I’d prefer to talk about it before I take you home.”
By the time he finishes the sentence you’re already wrestling your phone from the depths of your bag in search of a ride sharing app.
“Okay, well I’m done talking because I don’t think there’s anything to talk about, so—”
“No, you’re done talking because this is what you do. You can never admit it when you want something because that would mean acknowledging that you’re a human being with emotions, and that’s too scary for you.”
Surely you misheard him. You turn around, a deep frown contorting your features.
“Excuse me?”
He only looks at you in that expectant, knowing way of his.
“It’s too scary so you run away. You’d rather burn your relationships to the ground and rebuild them with a new person every time than actually let someone in.”
“You don’t know me!” You yell.
“Do you actually think that’s true?” Spencer says, pushing off his perch against the counter, voice shrilling and raised slightly as he gets visibly agitated. “You think I’ve spent hours upon hours with you and I don’t know you at all?”
“You have no idea what I’m like in a relationship because this isn’t one. You have no fucking idea what I want, so do not presume to,” you seethe.
“You want a relationship. You wanted my friends to know you and you didn’t tell me that because you’re fucking terrified of the fact that I do know you. You can’t stand the idea that regardless of how many times you tell yourself it’s just sex, you have been vulnerable with me, and you’ve told me things you’ve never told anyone before, like why your last three relationships really ended, and how you constantly self-sabotage when you’re on the verge of getting what you want because you think you don’t deserve it.”
“Shut up!”
“No. I’m not just going to let you walk away from me like you did everyone else who could’ve ever cared about you because I know once you walk out that door you’ll stop responding to my calls and texts and I’ll never see you again, which is a juvenile pattern and completely unsustainable if you don’t want to keep pushing people away for the rest of your life!”
“God, Spencer, stop!” You sob, staggering back like you’ve been stabbed.
The urgency, the raw, desperate scratch of your voice, stops him in his tracks.
Every place an arrow penetrated a chink in your armor aches, and it hurts so much worse because he knew exactly where they were. You don’t know when or how it happened, but he’s right. Despite your most valiant efforts, Spencer Reid knows you. Somehow he crept in and grew over every limb like ivy. It’s crawled over your feet and up your legs and it’s keeping you there, rooted in place in his apartment, sobbing silently into the crook of your arm because you feel utterly paralyzed with fear.
Just as he’d said.
It’s silent for a long stretch of time, unquantifiable the same way the distance between the beach and the horizon is unquantifiable. It’s sprawling and infinite and desolate. The only relief from the drowning quiet is the occasional gulp of air or gasp from you which furthers your humiliation.
“I’m sorry,” Spencer finally whispers, soft and unsure like rays of weak sunlight over staggered tides, in the grey morning after a raging storm. It’s an attempt. It’s earnest and afraid.
The energy radiating off of him is so tangible that you can sense his desire to come near. To hold you. But that would be your worst nightmare come to fruition. This—this warbling and crying in front of him in silence in his dark apartment is god-awful enough. But to be comforted? For him to bear witness up close and personal to your humility and your ugly, jagged pieces—that inspires true catatonia. That is everything he said you were afraid of, and he was right.
You resent your human nature, and the fact that you care how his friends look at you and that it stung when they did so with little more than apathy. You hate that you care that he hasn’t told them about you. You hate that you feel so unimportant—because more than anything, you want to be fine with being unimportant.
You want to be fine. Constantly.
You hate that you feel. You hate that you care.
But you always have. And so fucking deeply.
Somehow, Spencer Reid is the only one who has ever noticed.
Eventually, his self-restraint snaps and he surges forward at the same time as you take a shuddering inhale and step back.
“Please don’t touch me,” you whisper. Afraid that if he did, his fingers would only sink into your flesh like decaying fruit. That you would disintegrate in his hands, and he’d finally see you’d been rotten the whole time.
He speaks softly, holding his hands up to show you he’s not a threat.
“Okay. I won’t. I’m sorry.”
“I need to go home.”
“I’ll—”
“No. I don’t want a ride. I’ll get a car.” You speak quietly. Efficiently. There’s no point in pretending this doesn’t feel catastrophic anymore.
His brows furrow. Like a moth to flame, like he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it, he draws nearer again.
“I’m not comfortable with you on the street at this hour.”
“I’ll wait in the lobby,” you insist, pleading, a wounded animal, because he doesn’t seem to understand how every casual notion of kindness is a violence, how he’s ripping into you and making it so you’ll never be able to put yourself back together. He can’t be kind like you’re easy to be kind to.
If you’re easy to be kind to, you are just as easy to hurt. Accepting that kindness is a sort of vulnerability you feel you can’t afford right now.
Another moment of silence, of stillness, as if you’re both bolted to the ground where you stand.
When he speaks it’s a blow to the chest because you’ve made him cry too.
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, quietly, and a venomous self-hatred drips down your throat. Because you’re doing it again.
Maybe this is all you will ever be.
You fail to stifle a sob and Spencer steps closer still, saying your name desperately and so quietly like it’s his last rite.
And you try. You try harder than you ever have to stay in one place, to get a hold of your vibrating and to swallow all those slithery feelings and ignore every alarm telling you to panic when he reaches out to touch your arm because it’s never safe to let people in. But when his hand finally brushes you, it’s like a cow prod. You jolt backward.
“I can’t, I’m sorry,” you whisper all in one harrowed breath, and there’s so much you’d like to say—you’re right, about everything, you do know me, you know what I want, I tried, I’m ashamed—but none of it matters. None of it is enough. He’s backed you into a corner of your own making, and the only way out is by pushing him aside even if it hurts you both.
So you don’t say anything else. You leave him there, in the dark of his own apartment, and you disappear down the hall.
Maybe this is all you will ever be.
1K notes
·
View notes
giving zayne head :3
pairing: zayne x afab!reader (fem)
genre: smut, pwp, oneshot
warnings: MDNI (18+), oral sex (m!receiving), rough sex, face fucking, hair pulling, dubcon if you squint, cum eating, established relationship
word count: ~1k
guys i just want to suck this man's dick idk what to tell you
zayne is much more of a giver than a receiver, hence why he never lets you go down on him. "i don't wanna hurt you," is always the excuse he uses. and to his credit, he was big, so his concern was kind of warranted. but tonight, he came home from the hospital particularly stressed out. plus, there was something about him when his hair is disheveled, dark circles under his eyes, and his tie slightly loosened that drove you feral. how could you watch your poor zayne, who is always serving you—eating you out until you're gasping for air and pleading him to stop—in such a state, and not want to...relieve some of his stess.
so after a bit of convincing (begging), he gave in. despite his surface level resistance, it was hard to say no to the thought of you looking up at him with his cock stuffed in your mouth, eyes watering as you're barely able to wrap your lips around his thick shaft.
you sit on top of him, straddling his hips. you gently bite down on his bottom lip, running your tongue along the sensitive skin. you hold back a moan as you feel his erection press up against your clit. you move down, kissing his neck and defined chest, his shirt long gone at this point.
you inch downwards towards his crotch to find his erection tenting at the restrictive fabric. you stare hungrily at his clothed cock, gulping in anticipation. unable to contain your excitement, you start unbuckling his belt. zayne chuckles softly at your enthusiasm and slides out of his pants.
now in his underwear, his bulge was much more apparent. you press against his erection with your palm, teasing him with slow strokes through his underwear. he lets out a low groan that sends shivers down your spine.
you remove your hand and playfully give him a few pecks through the thin fabric, before slipping your fingers underneath the waistband. you tug at his underwear, pulling it downwards until his painfully erect cock springs out. he was big. you wonder for a second how you’ve ever been able to fit it all inside you. he was already leaking precum and practically twitching with arousal. if he wasn’t so tired, he’d love to fuck you into the morning.
you wrap your hands around his thick shaft, bringing his cock towards your mouth. zayne shivers as he feels your breath graze his sensitive tip. “don’t strain yourself too much,” he warns.
“you worry too much," you reply.
you proceed to lick a long stripe from the base to the tip, your tongue sliding across the slit, tasting the slight saltiness of his precum. he lets out a deep sigh, as if all the tension that had been building throughout the day melted away. you wrap your lips around the tip, slowly sinking down on his shaft. your mouth is stretched as wide as possible as you stuff it full of his girth. you continue to push down on his length until his tip is pushing against the back of your throat.
you let out a muffled moan. "fuck," he sighs, shuttering in response to the vibrations on his dick. his fingers comb through your hair and grasp at the roots.
you slide back up and your lips release their grip on his cock. "look at me," he demands. he pulls your hair backwards, raising your head towards him. you look up at him through lidded eyes, lips glistening from saliva. "such as pretty girl," he coos.
he brings your head back to his cock and you start to bob up and down. you move agonizing slow at first. partly to tease him, but also to let your mouth adjust to his size. his hand follows your rhythm, applying gentle pressure. the feeling of your warm, wet mouth slipping up and down his cock was to die for. it took everything in him not to just fuck your face.
as your mouth gets accustom to the stretch his thick cock, you speed up your pace. you maintain a tight suction on his dick, making it hard for him to last long. you slide your tongue across the tip, the stimulation making him buck his hips up.
he watches you with his mouth slightly agape as you make his cock disappear into your mouth. his grip on your hair gets tighter, "fuck, you take me so well." you feel a flutter in your lower stomach in response to his praise. as you slide upwards on his shaft, you take his dick out of your mouth. you make eye contact with him as you gently tap his tip on your bottom lip, before sliding your mouth back down. you hum in response as you continue bobbing your head.
he wants to be gentle, but he can’t help but to thrust shallowly into your mouth. your eyes water as you take his length deep inside your throat. he can tell by the shuttering of his hips that he’s close.
you feel a familiar stickiness in between your legs as you soak through your panties. it drove you crazy seeing him come undone in your mouth. both of your hands were occupied, stroking zayne's cock. it felt like torture not being able to touch yourself.
his eyebrows are furrowed in concentration. "i-i'm gonna cum," he strains, "you're such a dirty fucking girl. you want me to cum in that pretty little mouth?"
you moan and nod your head as you chase his release, taking his length faster and deeper. all you can think about it tasting his spend on your tongue.
his grip on your hair is tight in his fist as he pushes your head down roughly. the movement of his hips get more erratic before he lets out a loud groan, reaching his peak. his cock throbs as he spills his seed into your mouth. you taste the warm, salty liquid as it hits your tongue. he continues to thrust, fucking his cum into your mouth.
his movement slows to a stop as he comes down from his high. his breathing is heavy, like he just ran a marathon. you slide your lips off of his cock, struggling to contain all of his seed. you make eye contact with him as you swallow, wiping the excess cum on the side of your mouth.
he smiles at you, pulling you upwards and into a kiss. "i'm sorry i was so rough. this is why i always refuse you." he cups your face and turning it to inspect each side.
you shoo his hand away, "see, i'm fine! i'm tough, you know."
"hmm, i don't know. i think i'm gonna have to check every inch of you just to make sure," he gives your neck a few pecks on each side before trailing downwards.
he notices the wet patch on your underwear and kisses your cunt through the fabric, breathing you in. he slides his fingers underneath the waistband of your panties.
"i thought you were feeling tired!" you whine in protest.
"well, someone was able to replenish my energy." he presses his thumb against your clit, rubbing it in circles. your cunt throbs and you inhale sharply at the stimulation.
"plus," he smirks, "i'm someone who always repays his debts."
1K notes
·
View notes
WOULD LOOOVE to see badass reader get jealous over someone flirting with spencer
ty for requesting ♡ —spencer reassures you when he catches the eye of a receptionist at the ocean city precinct. fem!reader, 1.3k
Hotch lives on coffee lately. Any type from any source, he doesn't care what it tastes like so long as it keeps him awake. You're similar, in that even if you hated it, you'd keep it to yourself.
But you're frowning in disgust at your cup. Eyebrows wrinkled, lips in a fierce line. Hotch sighs and puts his hand on the back of your chair. "Are you alright?" he asks.
You've never told him otherwise. "Fine. Thank you."
"There's water in my bag," he offers. You won't meet his eyes. You probably have a headache. "And aspirin."
For as long as he's known you and worked with you, you've been as you are now, quiet, stern, with little sense of humour at work and not much more outside of it. The only evidence of your soft heart is how you work like a dog, and how you treat your coworker, Spencer. He's your achilles heel, your tender spot in all the tough scarring. Hotch knows there's nothing anyone can do to make you feel better if they aren't him.
Hotch turns on the spot to look for him. The case you're working on here in Maryland has hit a lul, and exhausted faces peek out from behind their desks at Hotch's looking. He searches for the short mop of brown hair that's required and finds it in an unusual place.
Spencer has been waylaid by a receptionist. Glimmering eyes, shiny silver fingernails that tap the desk in front of her as she speaks, the receptionist clearly has Spencer hanging on. He takes a step back and she doubles down, her storytelling audible from across the room.
"You'll have to see it for yourself, Dr. Reid, it's a sight!"
Hotch looks at you from the corner of his eye. "I see."
"Don't know what you're talking about," you mutter. You stand and tip your coffee into the bin, letting the cup fall in after it morosely.
"Why don't you go and help Reid?" Hotch asks.
"Help Reid what?" you ask. Your tone betrays you —jealousy, sure, that slight crisp to your words that must hurt on the way out, but worse is the weakness as your sentence ends. You're jealous, and it's upsetting you. "I don't think I want to help him with that."
Derek swings into the sequestered space you've been using to operate and beams at you like he knows exactly what you're thinking.
"Isn't it surprising how quiet he can be? Years of catching bad guys and he can't say no to a pretty woman," Derek says, giving you a knowing look.
You and Derek have a half-hearted rivalry in that he loves to flirt and you disapprove. Your soft spot extends solely to Spencer no matter how hard Derek tries to sway you, though as you and Spencer have gotten closer, you've softened.
Hotch thinks that Derek's teasing might erase any progress that's been made.
"Morgan," he says reproachfully.
Derek makes a who, me? face but quickly gives in. "Why don't you go save him?" he asks you.
"He doesn't need saving. Spencer is a grown man who can make his own choices," you say quietly.
Hotch bites his tongue. Thankfully, Derek speaks up, without any teasing. "Spencer's been expected to know how to do things without any help since he was a kid. I really think he just doesn't know how to walk away."
You look down at your hands. Hotch has been doing his job for a long time, and he can guess what you're thinking from a misaligned finger. You don't feel like you measure up to the woman at reception. You're insecure about Spencer's affection for you, because you can't understand why he likes you so much to begin with. Hotch has thought it about Haley, Derek of Savannah. It's a very human doubt.
"Spencer tends to stand straight," Hotch says, bringing the lip of his paper cup up. "Right now, he's leaning away."
It's in as simple terms as he can put it without outright telling you that he really, truly believes that Spencer wouldn't bother with anyone who isn't you. That Spencer loves you in the young, all encompassing way, even though neither of you seems to have realised the depth of it yet.
Confident, no air of the girl frowning down at her hands, you leave the nook to approach Spencer from behind.
"Hi," Hotch hears you say, "you okay?"
Spencer visibly relaxes. "Hey, I'm fine. Uh, Y/N, this is Anabelle. Annabelle, this is my partner, Y/N."
"Partner?" Derek asks.
It's news to Hotch. Perhaps news to you, if the way you take his hand is any hint. It's like you've never held it before, and Hotch knows you have, he's seen you linking pinkies under tables.
You strangle his fingers with yours. Spencer doesn't move an inch.
"She was just telling me about the sightseeing you can do here. Have you ever seen the world's longest worm on a string?" he asks you.
"Hi, Annabelle," you say, turning to Spencer with poorly masked whiplash. "We're gonna try narrowing the search radius."
"Oh, right." Spencer lets go of your hand in favour of putting a hand behind your shoulder, saying his thank yous and goodbyes to Annabelle before guiding you back to the makeshift BAU base camp. "What took you so long?"
"What took me so long?" you ask.
"I thought you liked me!" Spencer says, teasing, his voice pitching higher. "I didn't know how to tell her I've already read the pamphlet she was quoting. She seemed nice though, right?"
"She seemed nice, Spence," you agree, a little wobbly still but a thousand times less sullen than before. "I– of course I like you, you know I like you. Right?"
Hotch is proud of Spencer for how remarkably he responds. Spencer puts his body between you and Hotch and Derek where they're standing to offer you the privacy you prefer, dropping his voice to match your tentativeness. "Yeah, I know. I was kidding. I think they'd have to reassess my position on this team if I didn't know that." He grabs your arm, thumb pressing into the crook of your elbow. "Are you okay?"
"I thought maybe she was flirting with you."
Spencer shrugs uneasily. "Maybe. It wouldn't make a difference to me. Do you know that?"
Your head dips down. Hotch can't hear what you say, honestly, he doesn't want to know. Eavesdropping on the people he cares about in their unhappy moments isn't something he makes a habit of, but it's hard not to hear Spencer's response. "Don't say that," he murmurs. "That's not true… We'll talk about it later, okay?"
You clear your throat. "Yeah. Whatever you want."
Derek doesn't hide that he's been listening very well, pulling a crime scene document up to his eye line as you and Spencer pull apart. Your eyebrows furrow into a glare, but it's Spencer who says, "What?"
Hotch bites back a smile. Derek grins and holds his hands up in surrender.
"Just nice to see you taking care of my favourite girl," he smarms.
"Stop. You're extremely unprofessional," Spencer says, helping you into your seat unnecessarily.
"And you're not?" Derek asks, gesturing to his hand where it lingers behind your shoulders.
You finally chip in, apparently back to your regular self. "Only one of us was responsible for a unit wide HR mandate about inappropriate behaviour."
"You cannot keep bringing that up."
"Why not?"
Hotch takes a sip of his tepid coffee. He'd rather not get involved.
3K notes
·
View notes