#a lot of it is clearly ‘yeah this game has woke but i LIKED IT so it’s not as bad’

[j-esbian]

god the Woke Content Game List is stupid for so many reasons, but it’s also just CLEARLY subjective lol

FNV lets you have gay sex with several characters but it’s only listed as yellow, even though that’s a dealbreaker for other games. original Baldur’s Gate (extended edition) is red but BG2 is yellow, because there’s gay romances in both but only the first one has a trans character. what the fuck is “pro-DEI messaging” because I legitimately don’t know and that’s listed in a lot of notes. are you really so upset about a single line in passing from a Skyrim NPC that you needed to include that. these games aren’t even listed in alphabetical order.

[faislittlewhiteraven]

Tower of Dormont ISaT AU

Had a weird dream I figured would make a great ISaT AU if anyone wants to take a swing at it so umm, general idea:

Instead of the House being taken over by the King, instead the Favor Tree is warped into an evergrowing tower reaching up, up, up into the heavens.

Instead of the King's Curse slowly making its way across the land and Mirabelle being the 'Chosen One' to collect the orbs to stop it, it's time freezing Sadnesses raining down from the top of the Tower all over Vaugarde and surrounding countries, with heroes from all over (Euphie, Claude, various Defenders, people from other countries, etc) heading into the Tower to figure out what is happening only to never return...

And well. It looks like the end for Vaugarde, Mirabelle (having finally hit the 'I know what Euphrasie said but I've got to do something' point) has recruited Isa, Odile and Bonnie for a last ditch effort to try and stop the world from ending by Tower and...

Within the first few floors (which keep changing but kind of look like... The House of Dormont? No, that bit there looks like Odile's family home, and that room there is just like Nille's???) they find an unlocked bedroom and in that room an exhausted, terrified and near hopeless Siffrin who can barely remember anything from his life before being imprisoned here (even takes a bit to recall his name over the now despised 'Bright One') but after a bit of coaxing they admit they know a LOT about the floors ahead and might be willing to help the party reach the top of the Tower where they can put a stop to the madness going on outside but in return they must not let the King catch them (not again not again not again)...

Party are actually pretty cool with this (you know, aside from general 'is this person legit or actually an enemy?' concerns) but well, it's hard not to notice as their guide goes from barely able to fight beyond weak scissors craft and buffs to healing and every craft type under the sun. From claiming they don't know what's behind a certain door or above the next floor to explaining in detail that the prisoners in cages on the next floor are all Sadnesses, or that 'the King is coming, he hasn't realised I've left the room yet but I need something, anything, to mask my scent' (and later gets everyone to leave false trails down halls via jars of sugar and honey they picked up a few rooms previous). From claiming that the party are the only other people they've ever seen here to having near breakdowns over finding books or paintings with imagery and words that seem eerily familiar (think a book that reads like 'Claude wonders why Euphrasie and their amnesiac guide are so fussed about the walls here apparently being covered in stars? Why do stars matter anyway?'), etc.

Oh and they glow more and more with each floor which er, is probably going to make hiding from the King (who is VERY DEFINITELY after them judging from all the "Bright One, you know you are not supposed to leave you room. You do not want me angry again do you Bright One?" roaring) increasingly difficult.

...

And yeah. I don't actually know what is going on in this story beyond cool imagery due to the whole 'Literally woke up with this in my head because dream' but...

Been thinking it's kinda like an 'end game Persona series' situation where a chance friendly meeting/talk between Sif and the King right before the King's rampage would've started, led to the King to realizing he could use his Wish Craft to force the people of Vaugarde to 'wish with him' (see: escalating brainwashing madness), forcing a terrified Sif to go along with it (no brainwashing for the Bright One no, not when they were clearly sent by the Universe to be the King's guide ignore the Bright One's screams that this is wrong, that they want nothing to do with this; clearly oracles only relay the Universe's intent not share it themselves), and the current 'raining time freezing Sadnesses/Sif clearly being stuck in some weird looping variant' stuff being the result of Sif's 'Please protect Vaugarde and restore our home' wish said at the King's orders being heard by the Universe as "please Universe do whatever you can to stop all of Vaugarde- No, the world from falling under the King's control! + Someone, anyone save me! + 'immense amounts of self loathing and a desire to known and held accountable for inadvertently sparking a man made apocalypse' + Universe I wish I had people who actually cared about me/who would never only use me as a tool to save the world" and er well. The Universe had a way to 'protect everyone from the King' that would also kind of fit the King's wishes, a whole heap of power from all the brainwashed people the King was leading plus the 'meant to be repurposed' freezing all of Vaugarde in time ritual the King crafted to work from Dormont and... Yeah. Add to that people all over Vaugarde and possibly other countries 'adding' to the 'please save us' wish bank after Sif had already accidently centered it all around himself and basically both Sif's loops and the Sadness hell storm are being powered up by everyone everywhere in one huge ball of 'Hmm, I wonder if this all ends with the King getting killed or is there gonna be a big old morality question thingy post King killing at the end where Sif, upon remembering that "this is all my fault" tries to get the others to kill him which other heroes may have done (and thus triggering the loop, sending Sif back to the start possibly missing memories of them to hide away in shame/terror/etc) whereas Mira, Isa, Odile and Bonnie have gotten far too attached to this tragic, self sacrificing idiot and were willing to let the rest of the world be fully frozen for the rest of Sif's natural lifespan if it meant he could finally be free (not happy about it mind you, but like, just the 5 of them living in a quiet world until everyone else is safely freed after Sif's natural death is better than murdering someone who went through an eternity of horrors to protect a world they couldn't even remember and who's death might not even be the true answer anyway)'.

Oh and the King should basically be treated like a yandere version of the Reaper or something throughout the story (dream had way too many 'and then the King was suddenly there killing someone until Sif slashes their throat -no tears to use in this Tower alas- and from the party's perspective basically has a 'vision of the future' and/or freakout for seemingly no reason in the middle of Snack Time), while each of the many many floors of the Tower are basically due to being altered to match the minds of everyone (frozen or not) in the Tower, kinda like a Palace or P4 dungeon, due to well, Sif unconsciously wanting to learn more about them, wanting to remember/forget, possibly on some level wanting the King to how horrible this all actually is IDK (snack rooms, like the bedroom Sif was in are basically P5 saferooms but less 'area weak in cognition' and more 'Sif wishes for there to be places safe from the King and all the Sadness so there are some even if he knows he can't stay in them forever least they become prisons for him'). ...Might be nightmare floors as well? To represent Sif's terror of bad things happening to anyone he becomes attached to and wanting to be able to protect them so basically, they are accidentally making their own opposition (possibly based off of what they hear the others being afraid of/the desire to be useful to them) and I think Slay the Princess might make for great inspiration there if you need an idea of how crazy that might go~ XD

...So. Yeah. If anyone wants to use any of this for any fanfic ideas, please go ahead as I kind of would like to focus on my Selkie Au and fics for other fandoms more than this weird dream that basically took over my brain and said SHARE in caps so loud I've been stuck thinking about it ever since.

[reilleclan-blog]

They are just dancing ur honor

YEAH THE DANCE WITH DEATH or OF DEATH

um i genuinely love this series i think the devs made a game not to "hype up" their main character which a lot of games and story telling does, but they made a game about changing and perspective and I respect them a lot for that. B/c these are just ppl trying to survive not superheroes or op characters. Not that there's anything wrong with stories like that i just think stories like that have gotten old.

So yes Ellie changes Abby changes but I still love the characters a lot , at times I wished Ellie stayed with Dina but I'm like maybe that's just what she needed to do to finally change/let go of the past and further more forgive Joel. It was heartbreaking to see Ellie leave Dina cause I loved their dynamic and how often does unrequited love work out lol. But I don't blame either one for their choices I was upset with Ellie but it is what it is. It makes me think like "yes this person has changed but they are still the person I knew. So do I want to keep them in my life or let them go" kinda thing.

And all power to the audience but I think ppls discourse of the game was a little biased. Everyone hated Abby which yes she killed Joel. (Oh yeah and everyone was being transphobic and homophobic in general) and then a lot of ppl were mad Ellie didn't kill Abby(this is just a lot of shit I saw ppl complain about when the story was first released) but no one really talked EVER about a lot of the symbolisms or "coincidences" that happen thru the game.

Like the switch blade and little Ottie the elephant(i think that's its name) symbolizing the innocence of a child and showing Ellie whos changed and had to kill over the years

Or the fact that Abby is shown in a Halloween store on the "Seattle day 1"(when showing Abby after Joel's death) reminding me of the left behind dlc and they play around in a Halloween store . Or the parallels of Owen and Abby's relationship to Ellie and Riley when they were younger. And one friend wanting to explore but the other is trying to go back home.

Ellie and Abby both having tank tops on during their final fights lol not that important but yah. There's more but that's all I can remember right now I gotta play the rest of this game on grounded I know I'm gonna get my ass kicked playing that shit. I ususally play on story mode cause I want to enjoy the story lol but sometimes I know I can play on normal I just don't be feeling like it.

I'd honestly give this series a 10/10 it was amazing to experience very heavy subjects and topics talked about mostly is revenge worth it or how much are u willing to change for it.

Also Abby being so caring for the two young Seraphites was so nice to see her being "motherly" and sweet to them but also gruff with the way she talked. And honestly I got a soft spot for Abby idk is it the muscles? Lol and I saw someone say Dina carried her relationship with Ellie I'd say "yes and no" I think they had a lot of "let's clear the air" but never did that b/c Ellie probably didn't want to talk about it and/ or they weren't ready to talk about it. And Ellie was trying so hard to act like nothing was wrong but it clearly was wrong. So yes they were happy together but couldn't let go. I said this already but Ellie was like a warrior that couldn't leave the battlefield cause that's all she was used to. But she didn't really "try" to be happy either. All the killing and murder and brain trauma I doubt a couple months would cure u of the fucked up shit. Trying to heal from trauma takes tim on e but she didn't really give herself that either .. so idk

Also I woke up to a pic of Ellie's leather strap shotty having 20 ppl interact with it so thank u I didn't think much of the post lol I did like the pic a lot tho. I think it's just tlou stuff is super popular either way thanks

This is a lil jokey joke but THEY HAD TO NERF ABBY JUST FOR THESE MFS TO EVEN STAND A CHANCE AGAISNST HER THAT IS SO FUNNY TO ME. ELLIE GOT A DAMN BLADE FIGHTINF A MALNURISHED ABBY BRUH. Lol Abby was just so cold and cool I loved her bruh. But on god if Dina had died cause of Ellie idk if I could've forgiven her character lmao.

Also please I don't care about shipping ship whoever u like I really don't care I don't want to see ppl arguing about ships please. I liked Dina and Ellie but that don't mean I wasn't sad for Jessie losing his girl he clearly still liked Dina lol. I'm just saying I'm very neutral when it comes to shipping characters don't argue with me argue with ya mama

[fishys-still-writing-smut]

✏️Chiaki can pretend to be as disinterested as she likes, it won't change the fact that she was clearly jealous upon learning that Hajime and Mikan once woke up in the same bed together. Speaking of which, did learning of that incident motivate her to be a bit more bold around her precious player-two going forward?

Warning: Lewd Content Below

(thanks for the ✏️, means a lot <3)

“First place again. You really are too good.” Hajime sighed, but not in sadness. Playing games with Chiaki has been his main way to end each night on the island. Though he had to take a small break when he was sick, he's glad to be back in his best friend's room. What could he say? He felt more at home there than anywhere else.

“You've gotten rusty. You sure you aren't still sick?” Chiaki asked. She was currently wearing a onesie that hugged her curves a little too tightly for Hajime’s liking (the thought of another guy seeing his best friend like this made him several different kinds of weird that he didn't want to unpack). So he had to avert his eyes whenever he spoke to her.

“Uh, yeah, I think I'm just not as good as you haha. Mikan gave me the all clear. Should be right as rain.” Unfortunately, if Hajime would look at Chiaki, he'd notice her clear look of jealousy whenever he talked about other girls.

“...she could be wrong.”

“Huh?”

“Nurses make mistakes all the time…I think?”

“Oh well, you know Mikan. She's a really good nurse. Not just because she's an ultimate. Plus, she tends to go a little overboard when confirming people's health. She wouldn't even let me sleep by myself.”

“...what?”

“Yeah, she slept in the same hospital bed as me to make sure I didn't have any convulsions while I slept. Was totally embarrassing.” Hajime chuckled to himself as he recalled the story, even blushing a bit. However, Hajime still couldn't see Chiaki's facial expressions, nor explain that his blush was just embarrassment from being babied so much while recovering. As such, he didn't witness Chiaki's absolutely furious stare, and near controller smashing grip. She stood up and stared at the talentless student, determined she needed to make her move before it was too late.

“...but if you're still sick, I need to care for you too, even if I need to sleep with you too.” Chiaki got closer.

“N-no, it's fine, you don't have to do that.” Hajime backed away.

“...is my outfit making you uncomfortable?”

“H-huh. W-what, noooooo?” Hajime struggled to lie as his head was still turned away from his crush friend.

“It's fine Hajime…I've already changed.”

“Thank go-aaaaaaah!” Hajime, for the first time, turned to face her. Unfortunately when he did, Chiaki had already taken off her tight-fit onesie. And put on nothing else! She fully flaunted her naked body in front of him. Her double d cup tits were practically in his face, while her big fuckable ass seated on his leg. “C-chiaki!”

“You've been driving me crazy with your words, mister. So now, I'm going to drive you crazy.”

“C-chiaki…” Hajime's jaw was on the floor. His brain struggled to keep up with his body. She was his best friend. He couldn't.

“C'mon, let's ruin our friendship~”

Fuck it.

[The following morning]

*RING RING! RING RING!*

“H-hello?”

“Oh Chiaki! I didn't know you were with Hajime this early in the morning. Could I speak with him right now?”

“N-no! He's…busy at the moment.”

“Oh, I see. Sorry, I was just checking up on his condition. As a nurse I take my job very seriously.”

“Well I'll tell him tha- oh don't you dare put on that condom!”

“W-what!”

“I-I, uh, I said d-don't you dare put down the phone! I-I can tell Hajime anything you tell me…I think?”

“Really? Thank you so much Chiaki!”

“No- FUCK!. S-sorry, I meant no problem.”

“Just please tell him to get at least 9 hours of sleep each night.”

“Mhhhhhhhmm.~”

“And to take his medicine once every 6 hours.”

“Yes. Yes yes yes oh fucking yes!”

“A-and make sure he eats primarily hot meals.”

“Uh-huh, uh-huh! Yes, more!”

“Wow, you really care about healthcare too Chiaki?” Mikan spoke on the other side of the phone with sparkles in her eyes.

“...I fucking love it~”

[princess-of-the-corner]

Amnesia!Dabi: K, Mimi asked me to elaborate on 'Dabi joins the LoV cause he's out of options', & like. I'm not sure what else there is to elaborate on? Like, say we use his CC age. He dies at 19, wakes up 'early' (so, what, six months later? A year?) & spends the next few years tooling around trying to figure out who he is, but like. He's still covered in burn scars & staples. He has no documentation, no records. He doesn’t trust heroes or the government, even if he can’t explain why.

Honestly he might assume he was some sort of villain before.

Like he woke up in a sketchy as fuck clinic where the staff had immediately tried and failed to sedate him when he woke up, vs. what /should/ happen to a 'good person' of waking up in a decent hospital with staff that are immediately checking on him and only sedating him if he got violent and/or was in a lot of pain.

Then after he wanders off he'd look in the news and like. He doesn't show up on any kind of news story of 'coma burn victim wakes up and wanders off from clinic'. So clearly no one's missing him, whether it be family or the doctors.

His reflexes would have some sort of combat skills in there, and he does seem to have some knowledge of how criminal things operate even if he doesn't remember why.

Combine that with a distrust of Heroes and all....

So he might assume he was a villain at some point and that going to the police would wind up with him in jail for crimes he can't even remember committing. So better to stick to not doing that.

And yeah he doesn't have any legal paperwork and he'd have to find some villains to get fake paperwork if he wanted to start over. So for now it's a game of unfortunately stealing to stay alive until he can figure out what to do.

Joining the LoV would be a combination of things. One would be the above paperwork issue as a 'hey I can find someone to make me a fake identity and then get the fuck out of dodge'.

Another would be the fact that joining the LoV would mean more solid access to food and shelter. He's been doing okay-ish living on the street, but it's a lot and he'd much rather have somewhere to go and eat.

Thirdly, and probably the biggest reason: he still wants to know who he is. He thinks he might have been a villain before. Doing this might trigger the memories of who he was before, might bring him back to himself. And while he may not currently /want/ to be a villain, he'd still rather know. And he'll decide again when his memory is back.

Ofc that doesn't happen but....

[blackaleycatt]

Ordinary Things: Chapter 1

AO3 link: Here

5 times Aviva and Koki were clearly a couple + 1 time the guys realize.

Title named after Ariana Grande's song "ordinary things".

1

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Each member of the Wild Kratts crew has their own room in the Tortuga. Usually, they slept in their hammock in the Tortuga’s main room but on the weekends they liked to have little hangouts in each other's rooms. It was a way for them to bond outside of work.

They would watch movies, play board games, play some of Jimmy’s video games, listen to music, and Aviva liked to do everyone's makeup sometimes. Martin, in particular, enjoyed having his makeup done by Aviva, who was practically a pro at it.

Tonight they were in Aviva's room for a mini spa day. The weekend was coming to an end so Aviva suggested doing a “Sunday refresh” to prepare for the start of the weekday. Aviva prepared customized face masks for each of them, taking into account their skin types including retinol for Jimmy’s greasy pizza face and high SPF for Chris and Martin, who spend a lot of time in the African savannah creature adventuring. Koki had her own supply of face masks too, as she and Aviva had been doing spa days with each other since college.

As they relaxed in Aviva's room, the soothing aroma of face masks and incense filled the air, and the gentle hum of "NewJeans" played in the background. They chatted and laughed, enjoying each other's company, and the warmth of their friendship. It was moments like these that made their adventures all the more special. The boys absolutely loved having a spa day and were sad when it came to an end. They were already planning the next spa day as they were leaving Aviva’s room. It was getting pretty late and they had to get up in a few hours. Koki stayed behind, which wasn't surprising since Koki and Aviva spent a lot of time together in each other's rooms, even more than the guys.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

The next morning the crew woke up feeling rejuvenated and relaxed. Martin couldn't help but comment on how amazing the spa treatment was, "That spa day was incredible. My skin feels so rejuvenated and fresh," he said while rubbing his cheeks. "Mine too. My face was so clear this morning I almost didn't recognize myself," Jimmy said, rubbing his hand on his now less pimply forehead. Chris turned on the electric kettle to prepare hot water for everyone's morning beverages.

"I'm glad everyone enjoyed it," Aviva said as she stretched and went over to the counter to prepare her coffee. However, as she sat down at the table, the boys noticed several red blotches on Aviva's skin, going from her jawline to her collarbone.

Jimmy drops his fork and starts panicking. "Aviva, you have a rash on your neck," he says while covering his mouth. He looks like he is about to pass out or something. He's so dramatic.

Martin stops eating and looks at them. He gets up to examine her. "Yeah, you do. It's all over your neck. Are you feeling alright? Did you come in contact with anything?"

Chris soon joins them to look at Aviva's neck too. It had to be serious if it made Jimmy and Martin stop eating.

Aviva looks at them, worried and pulls out her phone to look at her neck. She did have reddish-purple blotches on her neck, but it wasn't a rash. She knew exactly what or who caused it. She covers her mouth, and her face turns as red as Lost and Found, their baby red panda friend. She stutters, trying to come up with an excuse. "Uh, it must be from a product I used last night or the new detergent in the laundry. Um, I'm sure it's fine, guys. Please don't freak out."

She tries to calm them down. She didn't want them to look too closely at the "rash" before they realized it was not actually a rash.

“Hold on, I have some ointment in my first aid kit,” Chris said before rushing out of the room just as Koki walked in.

“What’s wrong, guys? What's with all the commotion?” Koki asked. Aviva was covering her neck, and Jimmy still looked scared as he replied, “Aviva has a weird rash on her neck, and we don't know what it's from.” Koki immediately knew what this “rash” was that they were fussing about, but she tried to hold back a laugh as she approached.

“Koki, why are you laughing? This is serious. She might be dying!” Jimmy exclaimed.

“Jimmy, please calm down. She's gonna be fine,” Koki reassured them, with a grin on her face, both from Aviva’s embarrassment and the way Jimmy was acting.

“Yeah, Jimmy. Freaking out is just gonna make her more scared. Look at her,” Martin motioned towards Aviva, whose face was still red with mortification.

She covered her face and groaned, “Guys, please.”

Koki tried to comfort her by resting her arm on her shoulder, but Aviva glared at her. Chris ran back to her with some ointment. He took a handful and rubbed it all over her neck and chest. Aviva wanted to curl up into a ball and die.

Chris finished applying the cream. “There you go. It should go away soon, but I think you should lie down until it goes away. We don't want you to get any worse.”

“Guys, I'm fine, seriously.” She protested.

“No, Aviva. I think you should rest a little bit. As much as we don't want to, we can go a day without a new awesome creature power if we have to,” Martin sighed sadly.

"I'll take a day off if it'll make you guys feel better," Aviva sighed and finally gave in.

"I can watch her and make sure her rash doesn't worsen. I think Jimmy still needs to calm down," Koki assured the brothers.

The brothers nodded in agreement. "Okay, sounds good. We'll get the dishes cleaned up and head out in a bit. Keep us updated."

Koki smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, I will," she said with a smile on her face.

Aviva glared at Koki once again and headed towards the bathroom.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Aviva stands in front of the bathroom mirror. Koki comes in after her. “What are you doing?” Koki can see that Aviva is scrubbing the ointment off her neck and chest and has a bottle of foundation and concealer on the bathroom counter.

“This is all your fault,” Aviva snaps, ignoring Koki’s question. “You left this huge mark on my neck and then you had the audacity to laugh about it.”

Koki bursts into laughter, “I'm sorry. I thought you knew I was gonna leave a mark.”

“I didn't know it was gonna be that big. I've never had a hickey before,” Aviva complains.

“The guys must have never had one either. I can't believe they didn't realize it wasn't a rash.”

“Me neither. But I'm just gonna cover my 'rash' with some makeup so they won't be concerned anymore,” Aviva answers her question, holding up the foundation and concealer.

“Yeah, because Jimmy is acting like you have some kind of deadly disease.”

Aviva chuckled lightly. “Yeah, I guess it was funny. But next time be more careful.”

“OK, ok. I'm sorry,” Koki says as she hugs Aviva from behind and kisses her cheek.

"I guess I'll forgive you this time." Slowly turning around, she leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on Koki's nose.

[gust-jar-simulator]

Take this thing in media res from a concept I'm working on. Ganondorf woke his husband up and made a comment about how Vaati owes him. Game start.

TW suggestive? Honestly it's a lot of threats happening but. Yeah.

~🌺🏜️🌙🏜️🌺~

"Oh, Ganondorf..." Vaati stretched languidly in the sheets, considering his husband through the bleary daze of jasmine and sandalwood, the intricate loops and bands of gold across dark skin. Grey fingers caught at the scars beneath fine chains, and the other man's brow arched as he went with Vaati's silent demand.

The wind mage rolled onto him like a snake hoarding a basking rock, dagger-slim and dagger-quick, hands that could break the sky wrapped delicately around the king's throat. "You think I'm your consort because you saved me?"

"I think you're my consort for many reasons, mage," his king hummed, voice rumbling low in his stomach, in Vaati's thighs. He made no move, but the brand of his gold eyes was enough, attentive to be a touch in their own right.

Good.

"I am your consort," Vaati murmured with predatory silk, "Because no one else can match you." He leaned in, ran a finger through Ganondorf's endless jewelry like a scalpel down the lines of a dissection. "You might have been born to rule everything you touch, son of sand, but I took everything I have from the jaws of the gods. I'll tear the heart bloody from your chest, husband, if you underestimate me."

The velvet violence in his tone was somewhat contrasted by his careful attention to the ornaments in Ganondorf's hair, untangling them from his braids with the ease of long practice. His king thought about moving, clearly, arms shifting to perhaps place hands on a whip-thin waist.

Vaati's spine locked up, teeth bared in the start of a hiss, and Ganondorf smoothly redirected to drape his wrists against the pillows with a quiet hum.

Vaati's only response was a growl he wouldn't dare call fond, and he draped himself across his husband's chest to drink in the magic clinging to his skin, chasing the chill stain of darkness the way a Hylian maiden might chase her lover's lips.

"Fight," he rasped against obsidian pendants and emerald drops, "Struggle, hate, grow. Become more of yourself, and let me hate you for it, look at me and see something worth killing. Know, my king, that I am the greatest threat to your life at all times, because I made myself into what you were born to be." His fingers twitched, once, on the muscled breadth of his husband's neck, and he felt the shift there when Ganondorf smiled.

"I have nightmares, sometimes," the king thought aloud, "of coming home to a wife that speaks only kind words, and has never held a blade. I don't know how the Hylians do it."

"Their men are also worthless. I have bested many of them with a sword, and I detest swords."

Ganondorf's laughter rumbled through them both, warm and relaxed.

[u3pxx]

I know a lot of people dislike them, but 5 and 6 are really good games! Spirit of Justice got me into Ace Attorney, what with how friendly the game was to new players while still having a compelling political and legal-centric storyline. And going back to 4 to see how Apollo's character arc was clearly designed specifically around the legal aspects of the story was amazing! It's just kinda disheartening to hear how much people hate them, especially with how happy I am to see them getting rereleased.

good for you anon! glad ur happy abt the releases <3 i'm not really the biggest fan of the games themselves bc when i did experience them, the writing didn't really have that same feeling or tone of the trilogy games and it's smth that i neither liked nor disliked abt em, i just got bored in the middle bc of it adfgdgf

but yeah! doesn't mean i despise em! doesn't mean i won't get attached to the characters! even if i'm sad and kind of bitter about them not being able to continue with a lot of what aa4 has set up (gavin bros, jurist system, the siblings) and idk! there are definitely some lovely parts of that game that i personally do enjoy like i mentioned, most of the characters, and lots of moments from turnabout academy and turnabout storyteller and it's just, whatever im rambling here i just woke up adfsghd

[whetstonefires]

I love the implication that King of Retail is Too Woke™ because of non-white people having red or blonde hair. Nothing else. Just the hair.

LMAO yeah.

Like, these kinds of pseudo-intellectual takes are always effectively slightly in code, because they want to convey things like that the mere presence of Minority as part of Normal People is an off-putting issue with a work of fiction, but know if they say that completely straight out with their whole chest rather than just implying it really hard they will get themselves shunted off to the margins, excluded from being taken seriously by a much larger subset of people.

So I'm fairly sure the intended takeaway there is in part that you can tell by this that the game designers included POC in a halfhearted lazy way, because they didn't bother to add rails to their program that would prevent an improbable rate of blond black people being generated.

Which is not actually the worst argument as far as it goes, tbh, there's some basis for drawing that conclusion, though it's not actually proven; there's lots of other possibilities for why it's like that, including that no one on the dev team felt red-headed Ms Yeung or whoever was issue enough to put in extra work to prevent it.

But that doesn't matter in this framework, because this guy feels it's proven and understands that as being, further, decisive evidence this inclusion was 'forced,' rather than an organic part of the game about retail work, and therefore a matter of representation and Diversity and Equity initiatives, and the issue is that the POC were there at all when the developer clearly wasn't all that personally invested in them. And therefore this is a clear example of why deliberate representation in media is 1) tyrannical and 2) inherently stupid and deserving of ridicule. See how stupid the outcome is? Because Forced Diversity makes things harder and worse, not realistic.

But since he's speaking in shitty dogwhistle code for an in-group, he has left out all those middle rungs and skipped to the end, causing himself to look way more ridiculous.

[faith-alhazred]

well, here we go!

get some tea and snacks, it's going to be a long story.

Antique Mask is my ttrpg scenario based on one of Mystery in the Air episodes, and there also a lot of references to Peter Lorre movies. i've run it twice, for two different groups already, who not into old movies and radio at all - and still, they liked it. i'll try to tell how it usually goes.

it starts somewhere in Vienna during 1930's. player characters are some kind of good guys, investigators.

so it's autumn evening when one of them gets a phone call from Herr Paul Fenning, who introduces himself as an antiquarian. he wants to hire them to find one very valuable thing. in that place obviously the investigators asks him to visit their office, but Fenning asks them to visit him at "Jacob Berger's Antique Shop" where he works, because he can't in a fact go anywhere. he's paralysed.

so the team go to "Jacob Berger's Antique Shop" - and it's actually my favourite part of the game - and find it dark and closed. the only knock and a man opens them door without saying anything. it's tall gloomy black haired man with a messy beard and burned scar on his face. turns out, his name is Boris, as Fenning's voice commands to let the investigators in.

the antique shop is all neatly polished oriental goods, mirrors, candle light and cigarette smoke. Boris locks the door and return to his task - polishing horrifying curver indian sword.

and here the players meet Fenning - short man about 40, with a big dark eyes, constantly smoking and looking so harmless and tired. he is paralysed except his head and right hand, so his has blanket covering his body across the left shoulder.

i love this character. Paul Fenning does his best to be polite, but you clearly can hear irritation in his voice. he hates to be paralysed, to have to deal with a bunch of idiots, and he considers everybody around are idiots and morons - but right now he needs help, so he behaves himself, but still has that loveable vibe "if i could stand up i'd crush you skull".

according to Fenning's story, he works for the business owner, the importer of oriental goods, and his job is to buy antiques from all over the world. his latest task was the most unique and expensive item - golden posthumous mask from Greece. unique as it's woman mask, and very ancient. so, mask's owner, man named Aristide Zweig after a few rounds of negotiation agreed to sell it to Fenning. Fenning came to the Zweig's wax museum at evening, but after he went out he got shot in the back. he woke up in the hospital, paralysed, without money and the mask, but with Boris on his side, who brought him there, as far as he knows. and oh, yeah. about a week ago Zweig's museum burned down and Zweig himself disappeared.

and so, Fenning hires the investigators to bring him a wooden box with the mask, but they shouldn't open it - as a mask is so ancient, it must be opened only in special conditions, to avoid corruption. he pays generously of course, as its a matter of life and death for him.

here the investigation starts. and, well, obviously almost everything Fenning tells is a huge lie 🌿

will tell more in the next post 🌿

[cats-inthe-cradle]

It's like 4am and I just woke up cuz apparently my brain doesn't feel like sleeping. And because it's me one of the first things on my mind is my current hyperfixation aka ninjago so ya'll get some thoughts™️

Specifically about the au I talked about in this post (I still need a name for it pls help 😫). And since I was thinking about it all day yesterday I've decided some stuff.

So they do end up being able to free Morro from his curse or whatever as master of the airjitzu temple. Im not sure how/when yet. Probably sometime after Hands of Time. And after he's free he just kinda becomes apart of the team. (I have a lot of feelings about this after reading this fic by @ninja-knox-ur-sox-off okay? Let Morro be their brother pls). Also in Hands of Time when the airjitzu temple is under attack since Morro is still bound to the temple at that point he gets to go a little crazy with his powers. As a treat (the vermillion never stood a chance).

So he's with/apart of the team through all their adventures following that. And in Prime Empire he enters the game with the rest of them. And he gets a new digital body, which isn't quite the same as an actual body but it's still weird. And then when he's released from the game with everyone else he has an actual body (because I said so) and is no longer a ghost and maybe freaks out a bit at first.

Apart from that I haven't really figured out yet how he's gonna fit into each season post Day of the Departed yet (but don't worry I will >:3) EXCEPT that he's gonna have a significant role in seadbound because of the whole wind element thing.

AND in Master of the Mountain I've decided that when they all get separated he ends up with Cole/Wu/Vania if only for the angst of him getting caught in the whirlpool with them and (sorta) almost drowning. I say sorta because he's never fully under water for very long (Cole/Wu always pull him up before he has a chance to really inhale that much water) but overall he does not have a good time and probably has a mini breakdown/panic attack at the very least once they pull him out of the water. (Which I can picture very clearly in my mind currently.) Also picture, if you will, Morro desperately clinging to either Wu or Cole (maybe even Vania at some point) for the entire duration that they're in the river/whirlpool.

And like at this point he's not quite as afraid of water as he still was when he first got his body back (or maybe he kinda is? Since Mountain is right after Empire? But I know I want their to at least be a decent time gap between Empire and Mountain so that there's time for some Morro recovery stuff. Again inspired by the fic I linked above)(I really need to go read it again ahhh). Anyways so he's maybe not quite as terrified of water as he was. For the most part he's finally convinced his mind that just touching water won't hurt him. He can drink/shower etc for the most part without any trouble. And can even manage being in some shallow water when he's feeling particularly brave. But he doesn't know how to swim and still has a very real fear of drowning as that is still entirely possible. (I think he also just has a fear of death in general. He's already died twice and very much Does Not want to do it again.) (Actually 3 times sorta after prime empire??). Anyways and after Master of the Mountain even tho he hates it he's determined to learn how to swim at least a little so he doesn't ever feel so helpless in water again.

Also if I'm remembering correctly I'm just realizing that in Master of the Mountain he'd be with Cole/Wu/Vania and the Upply when they swim their way out of rock bottom (am I remembering that correctly?) Which of course he absolutely HATES but also he has no choice but he's still terrified the entire time and clings to either Cole or Wu.

I do love me some more angst tho.

Yeah he probably comes out of that season more afraid of water than he is going into it. Like some of his progress towards overcoming his fear of water is definitely reverseed/lost. So.

[queenburd]

why Does the narrator try to send stanley off by his lonesome? does his reasoning on that (...and also what he *meant* in saying if he was in stanley's shoes, he'd take the opportunity to get out, tbh) ever get shared with stanley? and, how might stanley react to that information?

definitely a thing they sort out, I think. (anon Im so sorry there's so much "I think, iirc" happening, I woke up about a half hour ago and my sleep schedule has been fucked for a bit)

The narrator is afraid of a lot of things. open world games, making difficult choices, rejection. powerlessness. all things that the real world is full of, and that the parable only has the most sterile iteration of. he's got no real frame of reference, and he doesn't think he would be able to function on his own in the real world.

and he would inevitably be on his own, wouldn't he? Stanley is his friend because of proximity, and not much else. Surely, once Stanley has better options, freedom and friends, and once he gets sick of the narrator's dependency--surely, Stanley will leave him to fend for himself in a world he doesn't belong in.

the parable is safer. the parable is his home, he made it and if he leaves, that's too dangerous.

and of course most of these fears mentioned get explored a lot in the length of the fic. (powerlessness- being stuck as a model as 432 tells the story, the skip button; difficult choices- again, 432's more complex narrative and the choice they end up giving him that he balks at; rejection- 432 goes out of their way to emphasize Stanley will not want to be with the narrator after everything)

these issues become a lot more clear to Stanley as they progress. he knew about most of them, tbh, he knows the narrator really well, but the fellow tends to get really REALLY... er. bitchy? as a defense mechanism when Stanley brings any of this up. talking about our problems? being vulnerable? illegal.

but there will come a time where the Narrator has to be willing to acknowledge a lot of these issues with Stanley. Stanley has almost always tried to be understanding to the narrator's fears and distress. he's willing to take the time and be patient.

so yeah when it does come out Stanley is like, well this should have been obvious, but admittedly at the time he was really angry and not thinking clearly. which, valid.

anyway, man demands they be better about communication. and also probably says something really gay idk, he has no intentions of abandoning his best friend ever he wants him around for everything.

[falconflight123]

Stuck In Doors (Obey me)

You find yourself introducing Levithan to a new human world game called Doors on Roblox, what you don’t know it that thing were about to get a lot more spooky then just playing the horror game.

~~~~~

No warnings really. This idea came to mind when I was watching some random person speed run doors. I was supposed to fall asleep but then got this idea and woke right up. So I hope you enjoy it! ~♡

word count: 578

Not proofread, excuse any errors

~~~~~

Pt.1, 

~~~~~

“Levithan!!”

   You slammed opened Leviathan's door with your D.D.D in your hand, excitement fizzing in your chest. Leviathan almost leaped out of his skin when he heard his door open. He turned around ready to yell at whoever it was, but quickly stopped in his tracks when he saw you.

   “Y/n?” He asked, taking off his headset and placing his controller down. “Whats going on?”

   You wasted no time plopping down right beside him and explaining this new game you found called Doors. His eyes lit up in curiosity when you finished explaining all the rules.

   “It sounds fun right?” You asked with a smile. “I was wondering if you could play it with me?”

“Me?” He asked. “Are you sure?” 

   Before he could go on rambling about how he was a yucky excuse of an otaku, you shushed him and nodded. 

   “Your the only person here who would most likely understand the rules” You explained. “And plus, your great at games, I can rely on you to help me.”

   Levithan was now a blushing mess and you couldn’t help but smile. What he didn’t know though, was that you were mainly trying to test something that he didn’t know. Your smiled turned into a wicked one when he wasn’t looking. Oh how fun this would be.

   “We should invite one more person.” You suggested. “It’s better to play together.”

   Before Levithan could protest about it, Mammon suddenly burst through the door with a huge bang which startled you both. He scrambled to your side in an instant.

   “Where were ya?” He demanded. “I’ve been looking all over for ya and your here with him!”

   “Quit being clingy Mammon.” Levithan sighed. “It’s cringe. And what gives you the right to burst through my room like that?”

   “What do you mean?” he hissed. “I’m not clingy! I’m just looking out for Y/n!”

   As you could clearly see, Mammon was now clinging to your waist with a glare. You just chuckled. 

   “Here’s the deal.” You suddenly spoke, getting their attention. “Whoever makes it to the end of this game first gets a kiss from yours truly!”

   At the sound of that, Mammon and Levithan both looked up in surprise. You knew this would only fuel their motivation to play this game with you, so what better way then to give them a prize.

   “A k-kiss??” Levithan stuttered. 

   “I’ll play, but it’s not like I want it or anything!” Mammon mumbled. They both were clearly blushing furiously but you paid it no mine at all.

   “Alright! Get your D.D.D’s ready!”

   You watched as they pulled out their D.D.D’s, their gaze turning to a determined look. You were glad they were about to experience this with you. 

   “I’m sure you’ve played horror games before.” You suddenly spoke. “I’ll explain more of what happens when we’re in the game.”

   “Ha! Like a silly horror game could scare me!! Mammon declared.

   You only nodded at his comment. He was bound to get scared at least twice. You turned to Leviathan.

   “Your not scared are you?” You asked, He almost flinched from your voice.

   “N-No! I’m not!”

   When you finally saw everyone in the elevator, stifling a laugh at Mammon’s character, you watched as the doors shut. Suddenly you felt really nauseous. You looked around dazed before the light on your phone flashed upwards out of the screen. Leviathan let out a gasp when his and Mammon's did the same. So it was working!

   “Mammon! What are these recent payment-”

   You faintly heard Lucifer's voice boom throughout the room as the sound of the door slammed open before your vision blacked out.

~~~~~

Honestly, what? Why did I write this? I have no clue. If you wanna see more uh I might do more. I honestly was just bored at the time but yeah I might make more ^^

I don’t know what to put, should there be a tag list or something? I don’t know i’m new to all this technically. But i hope you enjoyed!

[discodeviant]

HARRINGROVE FLIP REVERSE IT DAY 1: Stargazing Fluff Angst | Teen | 1.3k

The poll has spoken, so here it is! The only piece of standalone angst I will ever write. Still sorta hopeful vibes, but I mean... there's only so much one man can hope for. Anyway, please enjoy lol <3

Read on AO3 Made for @harringrove-flip-reverse-it!

If there was one thing Steve could do, it was talk, and Billy adored it. How he would be shy and quiet for a while, something clearly on his mind, and just need a little encouragement to get it out. With Billy, it was okay to tell every thought he had until he ran out of words, until the air was sucked right from his lungs, until he was dizzy from the vibrations of his own voice. He’d close his eyes, lean on Billy, and listen to him speak in fewer words with a voice that he couldn’t sleep without anymore...

Some nights Steve couldn’t sleep anyway, so they went to the quarry and lay close to the edge, staring up at the sky together and hoping there weren’t too many clouds. If there was one thing Billy liked about Hawkins, it was the clear sky. San Diego was smoggy and polluted, so he was lucky to make out the Big Dipper every so often, but satellites were often the most he’d ever seen. But out in the middle of nowhere, every twinkling light was bright in his eyes, just like Steve. Long gone, though, like his mother, and that made it hard to look up sometimes.

“Shit, you told me which one that was,” Steve said to him, one arm resting behind his head while the other picked up and dropped the same stone over and over again. “Hold on, hold on…” Closing his eyes, squeezing tight, he bit his tongue. “Perseus!” The rock slammed into dirt and kicked up a tiny cloud of dust beneath his hand. “Perseus, it’s Perseus,” he said again, and waited for confirmation that came pulsating from a star on the constellation’s right side. Steve never asked if Billy knew its name, but he grinned when it grew three sizes larger.

They played this game for a little while, Steve pointing out star patterns and mispronouncing their names. He stumped himself twenty minutes later and fell quiet, listening to the buzz of the forest around them, finding another pebble to hold onto. His legs just dangled over the edge of the cliff, heels scratching against jagged limestone. The stars watched him closely like he was the only human on the planet; Billy watched him closely because he was.

“Max has been talking about you a lot more,” Steve said to the sky, to Billy, to his love. “Good things, I promise. I’ll pretend not to be insulted that you never told me you played bass in junior high… you’ve sure got the hands for it.” Steve looked down at his own for a second, big and delicate because he had the easy road. Billy’s were strong, calloused at the tips but soft where Steve’s fingers traced over the lines on his palm and down his wrist. Gentle as Steve locked their fingers together, squeezed tight, promised that this was forever, that he’d never let go. Billy promised too, through tears and split lips, that Steve was his forever and always.

“How long has it been?” Steve asked, and he saw a line of stars that answered his question. “Almost. Ten months?” He couldn’t discern the breeze on his cheek from Billy snuggling next to him. “Yeah…” Steve turned his head a little, finding the position where Billy’s head fit snug under his chin, face on his chest, listening to his second heartbeat. “I forget sometimes. Is that bad? Like, I saw you this morning. I woke up, and you were there, and I made breakfast, and you were there, and now I’m here, and you’re… you’re here.”

Only then did Steve realize he was crying, long streaks of heartache and yearning down his cheeks and into his hair. “God dammit.” The hand behind his head moved to wipe his face with the sleeve of Billy’s sweater that still smelled like him, somehow, and Steve was sure that meant he still wore it. “She misses you,” Steve said through a heavy sob. “Max. She does, you know. She never hated you. Maybe the rest of them did, but they can go fuck themselves, I don’t care anymore.” The hand with the rock gripped it tighter, dug knuckles into dirt and tried to find its missing piece.

“And, you know, I know you wanted me to forget about you because it’d be easy or whatever, but—but it’s not easy, okay?” He wiped his nose, thinking but not saying how much he wished he had been enough for Billy to stay, to believe in something, to believe in him. Not saying how stupid he was for wishing Billy was still there, because he wasn’t there, and he wouldn’t be there, and Steve would have gone anywhere with him in a heartbeat—California, overseas, over the ledge he sat up next to and looked down as he crumbled again.

“I fucking miss you, okay?” He tried to change the subject, but it didn’t matter when Billy knew exactly what he was thinking anyway, swimming in Steve’s head now that he could. Now that he was in the stars, in the universe; now that he was the universe and all of the stars in it. “God, Billy, I miss you so much.” Dark and bleary, the quarry stared back like a monster with teeth from lips to throat, spinning like a saw, buzzing razorblades ready to swallow him whole and spit him back out into his own galaxy. Billy had one. Billy was one, a new splotch of color in the sky that showed itself when he went away. Steve wiped his eyes and looked up, right at that splotch, right at Billy.

“There you are.”

He smiled again, shivering with warmth, seeing Billy’s eyes again in the morning, his tired smile and frizzy hair. Come back to me, Billy, he wanted to say, but it was no use.

“I hope you don’t think I’ll stop loving you.” He gazed firmly into the two stars that blinked just like Billy, eyelashes and all. Billy always said that Steve should find better, would find better, deserved better. “There’s no one like you, Billy. There never will be. So don’t wait around up there and expect me to pretend there could be.”

Sure, Steve was still young. He had the rest of his life to meet someone else, to fall in love again, to move on and be happy. To let Billy go. To leave Hawkins and never go to the quarry again and let Billy be a thing of the past. But Billy wasn’t in the past. Billy was then. Billy was now. Billy was the rest of his days, he promised, he swore, and he would never break it.

“I don’t wanna fall asleep out here again. You remember last time,” Steve said with an amused huff, then stood and dusted off the back of his jeans. He still looked up, ignoring the pain in his neck as he adjusted the pendant back over his chest. Billy still looked down, still watched from his own personal San Diego. “I love you more than every star up there combined.”

And he remained there for a few more minutes before pivoting back around towards the Camaro, which also still smelled like Billy, to drive home. Every now and then, Billy’s hand grazed Steve’s thigh. Teeth nipped at his ear, lips and nose pressed against his cheek from the passenger seat. Back home, the pitter-patter of bare feet followed him to the bedroom, slid with him under the covers, and found him again in his dreams.

“I love you more than there is sand on the shore and in the sea.”

[cephalog0d]

For the WIP game, may I ask what "It's Not About the Pizza" is about (clearly not pizza!)

It does involve pizza! Sort of! The title is definitely a reference to the Farscape episode Crackers Don't Matter, because that episode is amazing and I love it. (This one was also inspired by a dream I had, and the pizza thing was one of the lines of dialogue I remembered when I woke up.)

It's really mostly just an excuse to write Dramatic Batbros. XD With the aid of some Gotham Typical psychotropic substances! Because as much as I like writing fun silly Batkids sometimes you gotta go for some drama. (And writing Dick and Jason reverting to bratty teenagers with each other is my addiction. XD They're idiots.)

Pizza is actually a plot element, though! It's set on the anniversary of Jason's death, which is relevant but not really the focus, and starts with Dick and Tim going over some planning stuff for their job for the evening while Steph and Jason bullshit about where in Gotham has the best pizza. (The best pizza is a place that's definitely some kind of criminal front, so like...ethical dilemma.) Dick keeps giving Jason weird looks that he (incorrectly) interprets as mistrust or annoyance that he's there.

CUT TO things going off the rails, as they are wont to do in Batfic, and some Mysterious Gas getting released. Everyone gets a little, but Dick gets a LOT and while it's not as bad as some other Gotham specials like fear gas or Joker toxin it's definitely got some sedative effects (severe disorientation and loss of coordination, maybe hallucinations, they're not quite sure.)

GIANT SNIPPET under the cut because it's one of the parts I have written and it's part of the pizza thing. XD

“Right, well, I think we’ve had enough of each other for one evening,” Jason said, turning to leave. He was more than happy to let the kids deal with whatever sort of nightmare Mystery Drugged Nightwing was going to be. Unfortunately, Dick apparently had other ideas. In a frankly surprising display of coordination, given how heavily he had been leaning on Tim and Steph not ten seconds prior, he lunged forward and all but tackled Jason from behind, wrapping his arms around him like a fucking vice. Jason hastily shifted his footing to avoid eating shit face first into the pavement at the impact, and then had to shift again to compensate for the entire grown adult acrobat hanging off of him. He made a token effort to either wriggle free (hopeless) or pry Dick’s arms loose (also hopeless), but only succeeded in shifting enough that Dick’s arms were at least wrapped more around his shoulders than around his neck. He was calling it a win. It was a tight enough hold that he would have been worried about actual bruises if he wasn’t wearing his body armor. (It might still be a concern, Jesus Christ, it was like being attacked by a fucking python.) “The fuck is your problem?” he snapped. There was a long, static pause while Dick’s drugged out brain either processed the question or tried to come up with an answer. (Or both. Or maybe he just hadn’t heard at all. He had his face pressed against the back of Jason’s neck, and Jason wasn’t sure if he was imagining how uneven his breathing was or not.) “You have a favorite pizza,” Dick finally said, absolutely nonsensically. Jason waited a second to see if there was more, but that was apparently the full explanation on offer. “The fuck does that have to do with anything?” “You didn’t before,” Dick mumbled. Jason made another futile attempt to free himself. “Yeah, hard to be picky when you’re fucking starving,” he snapped back. “No,” Dick said emphatically, with more clarity than anything else he had said since he got dosed. “No? No what?” Jason demanded. That outburst had apparently exhausted whatever supply of lucidity Dick had left, though. He mumbled something entirely unintelligible against Jason’s neck, still refusing to even slightly loosen his crushing hold. “A little help here?” Jason said flatly, trying to shift and turn his head enough to glare at the younger kids. Tim had his solving-a-puzzle frown on but didn’t actually move to do anything; Steph just shrugged. Wonderful.

Tim and Steph absolutely abandon Jason to deal with drugged-out Nightwing because they're the worst (and because something else comes up that needs Bat intervention and Jason's clearly not going anywhere at the moment, but if you ask Jason it's the first thing). The real fun part, for me, is getting to write a whole big sobered up conversation full of Jason being prickly and willfully misinterpreting things to agree with his own assumptions and Dick being Way Too Hungover For This. XD And the pizza comes up again! (Possibly literally including a frustrated "It's not about the fucking pizza!")

Anyway, that's that! It's not really a plotty thing, mostly just me indulging writing these two dumbasses being dumbasses and just effortlessly antagonizing each other even when they're not really trying to. XD Siblings, amirite?

[claire-starsword]

The Guardiana Magic School Run - Part 5

We arrive at Rindo, home of the greatest weapon of all time.

I can't buy it :')

To be fair, I don't want the squishy characters anywhere near the next opponents so it might be fine. The Steel Rings were a priority due to being chapter exclusive.

I guess I also need to talk about this peculiar drop. The Evil Ring is a cursed weapon that greatly raises attack. I barely remember how curses work in this game because i don't have an habit of equipping these. It can also be used to cast an overpowered Bolt, but that's against my rules. So I don't think this will be seeing any use.

It's okay though, because as the center of commerce Rindo has no shortage of stuff to pick from.

We pick up the Speed Ring and give it to Khris, who is terribly slow, this +4 boost barely gets her around Lowe's agility. Speaking of, one of her Steel Rings goes to him, and now they're tied at 8 defense.

As for the usual speciality ring, Rindo has the Charm Ring, clearly a help against the Marionette we'll deal with eventually. As you can see though, it is Slightly Costly. I'm not as much in a rush to get these as I was for the Steel Rings, because everyone in this team has some magic resistance already, but it would be nice. Kinda depends on how important the power staves turn out to be. More on that soon. Or right now, actually. There's no more window shopping to do and this town is too fancy for our tour, so we must head to Manarina where our magic advertisement will be much better received.

The Doll Hater is a beautifully named staff. From what I recall it's already stronger than the Power Staff by itself, and also gets bonuses against Mishaela's dolls. Clearly this version wanted players to have an easier time at the circus battle. Given how I don't have Power Staves yet, this would be a massive help and save money.

Unfortunately I can't say I have hope to get it.

Most of this battle with be in the desert, where everyone sucks at moving. While the enemies at the start are simple fare by now, dark dwarves and snipers and bats and other stuff we can kill quickly, but then there's this group of zombies at the end. Zombies tend to be an absolute pain both offensively and defensively, I do have some hope due to being in a greater level than I usually am on normal runs, but I have few characters to beat them up, and they can gang up on a single character. And poison. And the mages can come up as a duo for massive damage.

I hate this battle, okay. I hate it so much. It takes a bazillion turns to get to the hard part and then you suddenly die.

So yeah. I want to not die so I'll need to be extra careful and I think that ruins our chance of getting the clear bonus. Alas! Let's move.

The start of the battle is boring and easy yet takes seven turns. Dark dwarves are pathetic at this point so Max and Gong wipe them out taking scratch damage, with Khris even managing to get a kill and a level up with +4 MP, sucks that it doesn't apply to the current battle. I wanted to save Tao's MP for the zombies, but the bat is annoying and dodges several attacks and puts Max to sleep, and I'm trying to move fast, so in the end Tao has to do everything with two Blazes on it. Thankfully Max already woke up, but god this is slow.

At least when Gong hits, he HITS.

He continues to advance as the team's one punch man, killing a sniper for breakfast. Since he can't reach the mage next, I do some healing as Blaze 2 is still a lot of damage at this point.

There are also two bats coming from the right, but I don't want to waste time going after them especially when I'm likely to miss, I hope they come.

They come after Max's ass of course, what else did you expect. The mage also came after Max's ass. The Sniper came after Max's ass. You wish your feeble mind could conceive just how attractive that ass is. He's doesn't share the excitement though and is asleep again.

And wakes up immediately! Honestly that's really lucky, having the guy stuck for long could be a real problem here.

We are at turn 12, this might be impossible. Gong has one punched the dark mage who was the only big threat, so I'm wondering if it might be possible to go on ahead and let the bats follow me. Even that might not be enough to reach the zombies in time though. Also, I don't want to repeat my one death by thirst of an impossible bonus again.

afraid to say i'm doing it anyway though

Obviously the bats continue to chase Max, and he finally lands a counter to kill one, he had attempted this last turn but missed.

Unfortunately, the other bat has more typical behavior, so he's asleep.

I think this is on the reach of a single zombie? Please?

I think this guy will go for Max and not her, so I'm hoping to do some damage while not wasting much MP.

Turn 14. One zombie successfully baited and doing 1 damage, Max woke up. This is probably as good as it gets here. Gong gets to punch the zombie for half its HP as well, and is rewarded by all his efforts so far by getting Heal 2. The only thing against us as usual is that we might not have enough time, especially since the healers won't be hitting for much, and taking massive damage from the zombies. They have 8 defense each against the zombie's 16 attack. Tao has 9 defense as well. I don't want any of these people taking damage.

"And remember kids, you can't take damage if they turn to ash first."

I'm doubting Khris will ever reach anyone to do healing up there with the zombies, and she'll be even less useful as a fighter, so I'm wondering if she can be more helpful dealing with these guys instead.

:/

She thankfully takes only one damage (Steel Rings :D), but she's asleep now. oops.

Lowe however manages to kill the Sniper, so that's something.

Turn 15, I think Gong can survive on this side and then heal himself, hopefully the others will have managed to move closer by then.

Turn 16. Lowe has defeated the bat, but I don't have the slightest hope of him and Khris doing anything else now. Max and Gong have survived, Gong badly because of Blaze, and both are poisoned. I didn't prepare with any antidotes and Lowe is the Detox guy, so I'm gonna have to count on healing spells and herbs to counter the damage only.

I do think Gong can survive this turn though, he'll kill the mage, take 1 damage from the zombie, 2 from poison, and nothing else reaches him. He should survive. Please survive, man.

He can because Max is just too sexy. Turn 17 and I think we can do this, Gong should still survive at 1 HP after killing the mage and the enemies should beat up Max instead, who has 5 HP even after the Blaze 2 he took to the face last turn. We can do this let's goooooo

It works. Gong kills the mage, Max kills one zombie, Tao blazes the other for 5 HP. Next turn Gong has 1 HP and has to heal himself immediately to survive the poison, Max has 2 HP and probably could kill the zombie but I'm irrationally paranoid so I actually used an herb. Who knows, maybe the zombie has an evasion of 0.0000001% and I was gonna be the lucky soul to find out! So Tao blazes it again. Nothing more fitting as she is the face of this stupid run and its glorious school.

YEAH BABY

Our great efforts give us the privilege of being big haters on Mishaela from here on. We trash her circus area like delinquents and prepare for the next battle. Thankfully, the preparations do not include healing from poison, that's not a thing in this version, I forgot. Everyone's fine, which makes sense as Lowe has Detox, he can just make himself useful off screen like SF2 priests.

Speaking of Lowe, he has 1 more defense than Khris so I guess he'll be taking the Hater. Look at that. That's +2 compared to the Power Staff. This thing is pretty much the reason I considered doing this run, staff weapons at this point of the game get ridiculous.

The deals section continues to disappoint, so I sell Lowe's old staff to barely make enough money for a Charm Ring. I give it to Max because of how targeted he is, but I don't think a single one will help much after all, I'm hoping to stack more later.

That's all we can do, next time we finally get to Anri. I expect things to be chill there, but the circus and abbey battles in the future could be dicey.

Losses: 0 Deaths: 1 The expected deaths on Narsha interludes: 0/3