#a little update of my post about my blog
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Haiiiii ^_^ hi!! hiiiiiii <3 haiiiiiiiii hii :3
Welcome to my blog :3
(if you don't like me, i don't like you either)
(i won't bite you if you don't bite me first)
New account because my old account got deleted and don't even ask why...
(tumblr was a bitch, and probably deleted my old one)
-my name is Olivia
-i'm 17 years old
(older in the drawing so that anything legal)
-my bday is on 7th november (plixie month)
-my prononus are:
she/her and they/them
(but i prefer she/her prononus)
-i'm bisexual and fictiosexual and hypersexual and demigirl
-pochodzę z Polski (🇵🇱)
-digital/traditional artist (mostly digital)
-multi-fandom bc yes
(i mostly make fanart but sometimes... I draw my ocs when i'm bored)
-i mostly make sfw art but sometimes i making suggestive and Gore art
(pls, don't hate me)
-do not copy/trace/repost my art and Animations (anything!!)
(reblogs,inspirations and edits are allowed, but pls tag me)
-spam likes and reblogs are fine, i don't mind
-I'm fucking minor lol
-i'm kinda tall (162cm)
-i use ibispaint to draw and flipaclip to animate
Pls dni if:
-Under 13
-proship/comship
-map/pedophile
-izrael supporters
-terf
-groomer
-person who make jokes about rape and s/a
-skidibi toilet fans (i hate This fucking Shit)
-Zoophile/animal abuser
-racist/fatphobic
-homophobic/transphobic
-anti-furry/anti-therian
(leave them Alone)
-lolicon/shotacon
-etc
-or if you just bad person, i won't talk to you anymore
⚠️pls dm me if i follow someone bad⚠️
13+ only (16+ sometimes)
Also do not reblog this, bc that's my rules
-remember that whatever I say...it's just a stupid fucking joke and it shouldn't be taken seriously
and if you don't understand my jokes (my humor) pls get the fuck out...
I'm not pervert but....DAMN!! Ass and boobs are cool for me~😏
also google translator is a bitch, but i use it anyways because my english is very bad...
Oki i Think its a all bye ^^
#looking for moots#meet the artist#new rules#13+#16+#dni list#a little update of my post about my blog
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Creator: Mm, art block. What to do...?
Creator: What do you think, wackus bonkus?
"Wackus Bonkus" (Hand): make angst
Creator: ohh, you naughty wackus bonkus
#ooc#not queued#literally me a few weeks ago trying to force myself to not get bored of this blog#this is my excuse for making angst#also it might not seem like it but Ink is my favorite character#he's so like#idk#he's so interesting i like him so much i just don't like writing from his perspective#i love making him a really dark shade of morally grey where he's not a good person but he's not like#a bad person#he just exists a certain way#i do like dynamics between Ink and Swap where Swap is trying to see from Ink's perspective and understand him#but also on this blog him trying to justify Ink's actions because he's a friend clouds his judgement of what's generally morally correct#sorry for the ramble i really like this little paint boy if you can't tell#aforementioned ramble is correlated to the next post for the record#not very confident about it but i do want to show character stuff and give little spoilers n hints about what's happening#i gave the silly little blog a proper timeline/storyline oops#updated to include the wings i forgot to draw fml
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uncle neen!!! welcome back omg i was so sad to see u disappear </3 hyh !!! i had a question i asked last time but i was wondering since ur rewriting ur fics, are u planning on posting them on tumblr? or on ao3? pls be kind to urself too<33
good MORNING, lovie!!!!~ <3 c':
( or whatever time it is, where you are at the moment! )
i'm very excited to announce that you are my very FIRST new ask message on my brand new blog!
( teri is my first follower; ly ter. <33 o//3//o )
***long overdue UN ramble-bramble under the cut. xx
i /do/ miss my six hundred bajillion ask memes and am mourning the loss of all my online creations and great joys as a deranged southpark fanfiction author and the legacy i built with my tiny, gay weird hands
( i will go into it another time, but i had a very, very frightening bipolar episode surrounding my blog and my role on here as a writer, friend and mentor to you all, deleted all my things in a horrible panic, was able to recover them...but in the -- what i hope is the *very last* -- after shock of my episode...i got very scared, very sad and deleted both my dearly treasured and beloved, beautifully cult followed by many of you and other ghosts of sp style fanatics past ao3 account**
**( with peppermint on it at 13k likes which...oh my god, please be gentle with me, that was a very, very hard blow and rough realization for me and i am sorry to everyone who loved that fanfiction and wanted to go back and read it for posperity and personal comfort...i miss her too; rest in peace, pep, my first born. my sweet girl. </3 )
...and most tragically of all, i deleted my tumblr blog, with over one hundred pages of carefully curated content surrounding my sp aus, your lovely, insightful and thoughtful questions and inquiries, also typed with your tiny, weird gay hands answered, in turn, with mine, torched the ev. of those memories in the final blast and lost my window into your world through that medium...
...which is literally heartbreaking to me, because more than even my silly fanfictions or my blog, what i loved to do, was talk to all of you and read your wonderful messages each day and remind myself of why i should be here and continue to do what i do. </333 :'''c
BUT! my darlings, as ravenstan would say, 'it's always darkest before crimson dawn', for the very first time in several weeks ( which, i fear, and i was, full of fear and horrible self loathing/dread every waking and nightmarish moment ), last night, i cried for a very, very, very, long time, held myself together in the broken places -- told myself and the girl i was that i loved her and i was going to take care of us and be brave -- and broke the fever ( a little off key like jersey kyle, but very lovely nonetheless; love you tone deaf king. x my sboyf. )
today, i woke up this morning and slept...PEACEFULLY and woke up PERFECTLY HAPPY AND RESTED...
AND SMILED. QUITE. WIDE!!!!~ :D
and that is a baby step, but it is a step in the right direction and also almost wanted to make me weep like a baby again because i literally have not felt happy or like i do not hate myself for like, i shit you not, over like 15-20 days...it was frightening and fucking horrible! SLAY!
nevertheless ( or the most, finally ) i am excited to welcome in a new era/year of change on my blog and within myself; which is an era of peppermint flavored 'hope i'm healing' in a delicious rem(ember) font.
unfortunately, because i nuked my ao3 account, i do not currently one atm, but am in the process of recovering it.
( i'm not condoning any kind of rude/uncivilized behavior bc people are allowed to do anything they want -- but i'd really like to get my user back and would appreciate it a lot if no one used it to create another ao3 account just because it would be confusing for my readers and disheartening to me to not be boxwinebaddie anymore. )
until then, i will be writing/drafting rem(ember) in my messy google docs, am storyboarding everything to the best of my ability ( which is not perfect, but nothing is -- except stan and kyle to each other -- but god loves a trier, which is why he hates me: i prefer hell where it's drier -- that way my girlfail guylinea will not run. xx )
KALE SEITAN! ;)
posting little snippets of it on here for all of you, probably put it here on my tumblr and post it up to ao3 if i can regain my account/one in general ( i am a little worried that because of how long it's been, the loss of all my followers and, what i assume, is a decreased public or tiktok generated interest in sp, it will do poorly; rip </3 )
-- but the point is...that i want to start doing stuff for myself now. and not because i think i should or create unnecessary stress/sadness surrounding my strength or weakness as a writer or person ( or like, beat the living shit out of myself every single day anymore )...
...so i am writing it slowly, carefully, synthesizing all the info i gathered from over a year of answering your questions ( which helped me develop my sp au styles and their worlds into the lovely, seemingly breathing paper machslayed things they are now ), am going to write the fanfiction i always/wanted/ to write ( i’ve always wanted to rewrite RM, but was so busy and overwhelmed with my blog/my irl stuff that i couldn't )
and i'm calling it...
<3
p.s. ( i love you ): i am going to give my grandmother a copy of the first chapter of peppermint for christmas because i wanted to do something special/sentimental for her and secretly push the gay middle school style agenda ( she is actually very woke and thought my uncle might be gay for a while when he was younger, haha xx ), but i want to give them different names, so that on the off chance it gets passed off to my mom, my dad or manages to travel by world of mouth ( my grandma has a tendency to gab, but i love her a lot ) that it can't specifically be traced back to my dead ao3 or my blog.
so if any one has any ideas for silly interesting names i could give my sons, names for other characters or south park in gen. hit me up! <33
thank you for your interest in my work -- and in me, in general. i love you all dearly, i hope you heal ( i know you will ) and smile, pendejos because got a lot coming up on that crimson dawn and a lot of crazy shit coming down on that *jersey i won't say i'm in luh megara vc*
~SCHARLET sLUt~
cheers! mazel! ;) xx
-uncle nina, in her healing era <3
#hello my friends#it's really good to hear from you again#specifically whatever friend sent this message in! thank you my darling! i am sorry for the fright#but i am VERY EXCITED to start writing again#slowly but surely; baby steps#i want to fill in the tags more but even tho i did sleep very peacefully last late nite bit i am running on almost NO sleep#and not to be baby asf i cried a LOOOOOT last night and this past week/past weeks ( i have no conception of time )#its my slayolay cursed ravenstamulet demonic kennygal curse#and my eyes hurt A LOT so i will leave it at this! i hope you guys are as excited for it as i am and tbh i am actually thinking#that nuking my blog and starting over was a good idea bc i was a little too overwhelmed and i am excited for the fresh start#and now i can write my fanfiction with all the new information i gathered and was able to process and plot out using your#messages and questions! which makes i can now craft the most updated slightly unplugged better longer and uncut vers#of my fanfiction yet! ( i might consider rewriting pep after if i have the strength of will and the time to kill -- i am also going to#start going to regular 4 day a week multi hour outpaitent therapy and my medications were just upped and seem to be#...beginning to work? me thinks? YAY???!!!! <333 either way i am going to take things slow and do what makes me happy#i want to post snippets on here when i can and it is almost my birthday! t-minus two days! wooo! and my final thought is#if you rem(ember) anyone or have a pal you know was interested in my stuff/wants to refind me/tell em i'm not dead#you can direct them to this blog and this post ( all i ask is that no one make a large post or large deal about it because i am#very skittish and all that attention is WHY i had that bipolar episode among other irl things so i hope you heal i love you#smile pendejo and its good to be back ( even if its with one foot in the void and the other in a hellokitty roller blade ) xx
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( hrgggggg this blog needs an overhaul but that is so difficult to do on mobile....... )
#admin babbles#ugh#i need to make a list of things to di#like updating my tags#making a new intro post#i just want ppl to see my soundwave as a chill dude and not just a shitpost account#[strangles it] i have so many cool thoughts and feelings about soundwave and i think that the way this blog is set up is doing a disservice#to it#idk. i want to put together a google doc thingie but also [stares at my phone screen]#ugh srsly ive been thinking about this but the standards the rpc has needs to be more accessible to people who dont have resources like -#computers n editing software#n also whats up with the small text?!? im fucking blind i cant read that without everything getting worse#idk im full of thoughts and im a little irritated about all of them
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Musings on Psychosis
I realize now that my vampire 'type was a product of a psychotic episode that lasted throughout 2023. That episode has ended and it's been strange having certain perspectives of myself wrenched away from me. For around a year I was, perhaps, an endel in the immediate sense, but I wouldn't venture to call myself that now. It's hard for me to define now what vampires are to me. My general fascination with them is still there, and I remember the identity, shifts, and species dysphoria I experienced acutely, but that sense of self is distant now. I'm torn on whether I consider "vampire" to be a part of myself now - I know I certainly don't with the same intensity that I felt in psychosis. For a year I identified myself with monsters, werewolves, villains, and various morbid topics, and coming out of that was a harsh experience. In some ways I am no longer the person I was prior to the episode, or the person (monster/beast) I was during. All the changes psychosis has put me through have been unsettling - having it warp and change my identity on a confusingly temporary basis has been chaotic and deeply overwhelming.
I see a lot of endels and other psychotic folk on here with presumably permanent identities and sometimes I wonder whether anyone else has had experiences like mine. Especially those with episodic conditions like my schizophrenia/schizoaffective, where severity of psychosis changes over time and there may be periods of remission. I'm medicated, now, but I don't know for sure that this will never happen again. That I will never "become" a vampire again, or become some other species my psychotic brain decides to latch on to. My identity is fluid, and only after years of confusion have I realized that this fluidity is the product of a schizo-spectrum disorder. Maybe next time my identity has a total overhaul I'll recognize it as a psychotic episode - or maybe I'll be in too deep to realize, again.
#endelity#endel#i dont know why im posting this#it feels scattered at best#guess i figured it would be nice to update about like...the biggest thing to happen in my life in the past year#this is SUPPOSED to be my designated alterhuman blog but i so rarely post content on here these days#too little spoons...#using the endel tag in hopes of finding community i guess#i do feel very alone in this#blue speaks#blue's psychotic episodeTM
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Still alive! And what I've been doing.
So, I got COVID so I was gone for a while lol. That sorta put me out of commission for a bit. However, I have been starting to explore some more draconic stuff lately! Specifically, I'm in the planning phase of a VERY long term project for wearing more clothes that feel affirming to me. I have a Pinterest board, no previous experience in any of the skills I'll need, and Aphrodite* backing me up so I'll be fucking around and finding out. *I work with Greek deities as a witch, for those of you who only know me as otherkin and not as a witch^^
As I work to reconnect to my spirituality, my draconity, and my life in general- seriously, holy shit I was frothing at the mouth to do ANYTHING by the time I was feeling better- I'll be a bit wonky when it comes to how much I'm posting. I have managed to post the second chapter of my genshin fic though so I'm really happy about that!
#plying sky cotl a bunch more too which has been nice#it's a good way to connect with my friends who play :D#plus just a generally cozy game#like a nice little world I get to be in for a while#which I have no reason to gush about sky I just think it's fun#maybe sometime I'll post some in-game photography on here#considered doing that on my main too#otherkin#otherkin blog#not using most of the usual tags bc really this is just a personal update so I don't just disappear for weeks and come back with a meme#and absolutely no context
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*out of context*
where are you? why you dont do you update anymore? everything alright? luv ya
[Hi! I’m doing alright so no need to worry, I’m just taking a small break and should be updating again very soon. Thanks for your patience! ❤️]
#not asks#I’ve been practicing with art and stuff and I didn’t want to do anything too experimental while answering asks on here#though I might be using a different brush from now on#BUT I’ll be updating soon I promise I didn’t forget about this blog#and I’m sorry I didn’t put up a little notice or something#im still posting over on my art blog if you wanna head over there!
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You alive?
Yes! 😭😭
I am just VERY slow, bc i moved seveal states over, i got a new job, started a new online class, its been a busy month, so yeah 🥲
Feelin this gif type of way rn, im starting to get a regular life schedule so i can have some time to write
But tysm for checking in!! Its nice to know ppl will check if im dead lol
I am waking up at like 530/6am during the week tho so idk i might be bro lmao
I was actually planning on posting tonight or tomorrow!
So caught me just as it was getting too long to have made a post to show im alive lol
I live, peace out,
🌙
#lu x reader#moon chats#ty for the ask of dead or alive status#lol#i am in fact alive#i go very slow for this blog in particular too bc the lu fandom also isnt as fast or big as my other blogs fandom#so it USUALLY fits the pace of ppl checking the tag and notcing my posts#but i took a little longer than usual to post so its noticeable this time#glad im not just sitting in a void tho! nice to get a status update ask#if that made any sense to u like all that about post pacing; question for you#is that what social media manager ppl do lmao
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No I haven’t forgotten this blog!
WHY IS THERE 900 OF YOU PEOPLE HERE I HAVENT POSTED ANY ACTUAL CONTENT IN OVER A YEAR😭💀
I VANISHED WITH 700 AND NOW 200 MORE PEOPLE FOLLOWED ME
#I’m still very scared to post writing#trying to overcome it by posting this little update (if you can call it that)#this blog wasn’t forgotten#I never forgot about it#my crippling anxiety is just keeping me irrationally afraid of being perceived in any way including writing#I’ve legitimately got nothing done except for like 2 fics that have just sat in my drafts for over a year
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…
#being passive aggressive in my inbox when i dont even post content anymore#and my blog is mainly just little rambles or updates about my life or fandom shitposts#is insane ☠️#and a huge reason why i was demotivated to post original content on here to begin with lmao#like imagine obsessively combing through the rambles of someone talking to a wall#//it’s me i am talking to the wall/:#but no genuinely if you don’t like me or what i post quite literally why are u on my blog#goodbye friend ✌️✨
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sighs pitifully. i have GOT to get weirder on main about things nobody fucking cares about
#the heron speaketh#on call with erin rn looking at a blog that hasnt updated in 9 yea oh my god 10 years. its been ten years#and being like oh fuck yes my favorite little movie is on here. theres screenshots. and theyre TERRIBLE#and i oculd post BETTER ONES . but i DONT !!!!!!!!!!#i have got to get over the embarrassment. i must#for the greater good of. well me really#erin is already ahead of me on this talking about black death as if theres more of an audience besides us two and a pile of lint#i have to get that deranged. i think.#i have screenshot redraws to share also... perhaps that will be the starting point#in the words of erin right now in my ears we have GOTTT to get weirder about paul ghosted on main#and its true. i love that joey
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Hi!
Here I post a lot of Silmarillion and Tolkien stuff, sometimes a bit of Dragonlance as well.
I'm a writer and an artist so I will sometimes post fanfic or art too!
Asks are always open and welcome, whether about my writing, other assorted projects, or anything else!
Fanfics:
Be He Foe or Friend (ao3),
A Silmarillion choose your own adventure book!!! Post about it. This is my biggest project in progress right now! Tags: "be he foe or friend" "bhff"
Unable to See the Starlight (ao3) (tumblr)
A short memoir of a elf who lived through the darkening of Valinor. Tags: "unable to see the starlight" Completed.
Veil of Starlight (ao3) (tumblr)
Elured is Gil-galad AU. I have 3 random snippets: [1] [2] [3]* Tags: "veil of starlight" "VoS" In progress. *Snippets listed in order posted, not order they happen in the story, which is 3, 2, 1.
How Can We Heal? (ao3) (tumblr)
A different take on the Halls of Mandos, and Finrod's experiences there. In progress.
What We Became (ao3) (tumblr)
The blood of Sauron's wolves unravels minds. Sauron decides to experiment with the little king who dared to challenge him. In progress.
Organizational tags I use:
"I need more floortime" - Personal post tag.
"my writing" / "my art"
"about my writing' - just that, posts, asks, and tag games about my writing, and often times snippets I post for tag or ask games will have this tag as well.
I also tag all my fanfics with their name, ex: "veil of starlight", and sometimes an abbreviation of their name.
Up to date as of 5/7/24
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SoTFD themed blog?
Would anyone be interested in a blog just about SoTFD?
I’ll check back in later
#stories of the forgotten demigods#percy jackson#pjo#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackson fanfiction#pjo ocs#writing#heroes of olympus#my percy jackson ocs#percy jackson oc#honestly it would be like the little campers author blog#but different#I wouldn’t directly copy them because that’s kinda rude#it would be moreso posting about updates and sharing behind the scenes looks#anything else would be here on the blog
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Shoutout to my Monkees mutuals for reminding me about the Monkees and their music; now I'm thinking about how She is such a season 2 Damon talking about Katherine song.
Meanwhile, 1864 Damon is of course firmly Vampire Girl by the Misfits (he would die for her, and he did).
#Damon Salvatore#The Vampire Diaries#Datherine#the Monkees#She#that post defending Auntie Grizelda got me listening to them a little again and first of all She slaps#and second of all Damon is singing it about Katherine. privately of course. but in his heart#Vampire Girl#the Misfits#I like to imagine Damon would be very fond of both of these songs#some people see him as a Taylor Swift fan because he mentions her but he specifically says that he *tolerates* her music to get girls#the only music we canonically know he listens to is Enjoy the Silence by Anberlin and 21 Guns by Green Day. So really he's an emo#well and Ask the Angels by Dead Sara in season 5#I'm trying to think of any other diegetic music Damon chose in some way. but just based on those three I'd say he's a man of taste#and I like to imagine there's some diversity in what he listens to#assigned Monkees fan by way of my tumblr mutuals hehehe#anyways time for my monthly main blog post#idk I need to bring these things more into balance. but ah well here we are#I love how tumblr is just all of our obsessions bumping up against each other and sometimes meshing together#I should reblog with applicable lyrics#some music for my favorite terrible vampire man <3 ;)#update: I was gonna pick some lyrics but nevermind it's really just the whole song#although 'she needs someone to walk on so her feet don't touch the ground' hits in particular#Vampire Girl is pretty lyrically straightforward but it definitely hits human Damon's devotion to her#also I know it's not necessary to italicize song titles but I wanted She to stand out because I feel like if you don't know the song#you might think I just capitalized a random word. so I wanted to be clear#I ramble#even in the tags I ramble
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Hmmm I kinda want to make a side blog for RPG Maker game development related things to be able to talk to more experienced people in that community, but at the same time I both don’t really think I’d get much attention and don’t want to accidentally spoil my own game (^^ ; ).
I have a rough story, concept doodles, a tileset, some character sprites, an enemy that walks around but can’t initiate battle yet (if I even decide to have a battle system), a couple rooms with some events, and a functioning run button, but I’m still lost on how to do much else at the moment. Especially since this program has the ability for scripting, meaning I’ll probably have to learn and actually retain another coding language.
So, I’m not very far at all lol. Idk how well that’d go over on the established fandom website, but eh.
#text post#incoherent rambling#project update#game project#I’m still also debating whether or not I can actually even make a proper horror game too#It’s the rule of like just being a horror fan doesn’t make you good at horror being afraid of something does? ya know?#I am trying to go with things that scare me personally but it’s been difficult#either things aren’t concrete of concepts enough or are wayyyy too oddly specific to make anything about#which is quitter talk I know but how does one translate the childhood heebee jeebees of watching top ten gaming videos past bedtime 💀💀💀#or like the way too broad general fear of lack of control without making it too on the nose or too vague#truly a balancing act writing is#kinda ironically I am also a little bit less afraid of hospitals after having been to one for myself rather than family members#which makes things both more and less difficult???#on one hand I have better references for them now but on the other hand I’m desensitized to it 😔#I think I get used to things a little too easily for a lot of things to stay scary#the thing was a scary movie the first time I saw it and now it’s a comfort film#funger was a very scary game until I first died and reloaded a save with little consequence and now it’s just a spooky but fun rpg#but then at the same time thinking about a movie studio logo before a movie that scared me as a kid cause there was a monster in it#still gives weird left over shivers but actually seeing it doesn’t anymore for some reason#I feel like that’s how it’s worked with most things I’ve ever been afraid of in my life besides concepts like death control or idk drowning#ugh writing is HARD#but actually making a functional and fun to play game is harder oh my god do I not know how to make puzzles#I have made swivel chairs that can be knocked and walked over but that’s about it and idk what to do with that knowledge lmaooooo#and I don’t want the entire gameplay loop to be read text search room get key repeat cause that’s boring#I have also desperately tried making a stamina system but there’s not much help with that online especially not in the rpg maker forums#the no necroposting rule sucks all the threads for questions I have never get answered and never will cause no one is allowed to due to age#anyway idk what to tag this probably won’t get seen since it’s not my usual anyway but eh whatever I’ll think about this#hopefully I remember the passwords to two blogs 💀💀💀
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.
#a little life update for the mutuals.#this is really hard but also it's my blog!!! I'm gonna be a sad bitch on it!!! I'm gonna use it to grieve!!!!! okay here we go#my partner Oliver and I were in a car accident (moose) the weekend of thanksgiving (Canada)#I made it out alive. he did not. I'm fucked up about it. #....I had more to say but suddenly I can't.#anyway. that is why half my posts are tagged with 'grief' now.#cause I'm fucking broken.#I was going to marry him#oliver
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