#a good pun is its own reword

[strangelittlestories]

If you think about it, "engraver" and "undertaker" basically describe the same job.

[cosmicspaceslug]

Excel cells with errors are no good pieces of sheets

[archaeopter-ace]

For the fanfic ask: P, S :-)

P: Are you what George R. R. Martin would call an “architect” or a “gardener”? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the story unfold as you go?)

I think it's a sliding scale, but I do lean more towards 'architect.' Like if a shiny new idea occurs to me while writing I will absolutely make room for it, but I find it helpful to have a plan especially since I write out of chronological order, based on where the inspiration is. And sometimes the way for me to overcome writer's block is to break my outline down into smaller and smaller pieces until I have one Topic Sentence per paragraph. Then I go in and fill in the paragraphs in any order, and if there's one that I just can't find inspiration for, chances are that's because it's not that interesting to me. And if it's not interesting to me as a writer, it probably won't be interesting to my readers, and I can cut it out entirely. Just skip the filler and cutscene away to the next interesting bit, or leave just the topic sentence to show how characters got from A to B without going into detail.

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

Identity Reveal - and related Power Reveal variations - is my favorite trope to read, but when it comes to writing... hmm... I'd have to say Puns. Like I don't go out of my way to come up with puns, and I don't often write wisecracking characters, but if a pun occurs to me I cannot resist working it into the story. Doesn't matter whether readers will notice or not. One time I was writing a story about shapeshifters, and I had the pigeon guy wear a Columbia University shirt. Because the genus for the common pigeon is Columba. Things like that. Oh, and Actor Allusion, too, I just love making references.

Thanks for the ask! :-)

[limetimo]

how the FUCK do you people pronounce x. Please tell me this is a horrible terrible pun that doesn't actually work

This was on a post discussing shit parents doing a new satanic panic. Valid points all around but. But I’m crying. This is the funniest lie ever, no parody I could come up with this will be this funny. Nonbinary Julius Cesar

[imperial-science-officer]

you got any puns, good sir?

Yes, I know of some that are punbelievably amusing.  It is fine if others do not think so, because a good pun is its own reword.

[tsemoana]

source

[blackgirl-galactica]

"LET'S SEE WITH THE ASCENDANT" PART 1!

NOTE: WHILE I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL ASTROLOGER, I LOVE ASTROLOGY AND ITS ASPECTS AND I LOVE TO LEARN THEM! PLEASE DO NOT STEAL OR REWORD MY WORK WITHOUT CREDIT! THANK YOU :)

Hey y'all!

- I am finally settled and I am ready to give you some more astro knowledge to keep in the books!! Today we will be talking about the Ascendant (ASC for short) through the first 6 signs!! Part 2 will come out tomorrow!

- But first, what is an ASC sign?

-I'm glad you asked honey! First things first, your Ascendant is an angular house! Angular houses are the Ascendant, Descendant, IC (Imum Coeli), and MC (Medium Coeli). I'll do a post on what angular houses mean later on! Or do feel free to research on your own time :)

-Your ASC sign is what's popularly known as the sign (or sign traits) you may give off as a first impression to the outside world. According to the book, The Only Astrology Book You'll Ever Need by Joanna Woolfolk, she asserts that our personality is a blend of our Sun Sign in combination with our ASC sign. This has some truth in it as our ASC can also represent our self-interests, how we process self-awareness, our goals, our objectives, & how we assert our self-sufficiency! Think of your ASC sign as the sign when you walk in a room full of people.

- You can find your ASC here! Below is my chart( credit from Astro.com) for my visual learners! The ASC will be on the left side of your chart (marked AC); usually your angular houses are marked! In this example, my ASC is in the sign of Sagittarius!

-Have you ever had someone guess your sun sign but they were wrong? Chances are, they probably are guessing your ASC sign!

-With that being said, let's get into it!!!!

ARIES ASC:

Adventurous and pioneering!

Typically the ones to be "the first" at something.

Likes to get shit done! Act first ask questions later kind of energy.

Leader of the pack vibes.

Possibly have a very muscular, strong body.

When they walk in the room, they give such a strong sense of power, strength, and exuberance!

Possibly can be red-headed. Aries rules the color red and also rules the head. Doesn't mean every red-head is an Aries ASC though. Or they may like to wear alot of red.

They can give a direct, kinda bossy attitude but also a very free-child-like attitude I love it!!

Be careful with sharp objects. Sharp objects like knives are ruled by Mars (Mars rules Aries) and you may be a bit more accident prone so be careful, according to Woolfolk.

TAURUS ASC:

Very stable and calm energy when they walk in the room.

Patient & steadfast people.

Love the arts, could be talented at composing music esp!

Love comfort and the comfort their materials bring them.

Can have super beautiful necks. Necks/throats are ruled by Taurus.

Also, they may have larger, rounder eyes ooooo so cute!! Almost like a doe.

Can accumulate wealth over time.

Loves security and things that make them feel safe.

Many people think they are lazy, but that is not the case. A Taurus ASC does not believe in wasting time on things that don't bring them joy or comfort. They are hardworking, if it means they can attain the goals they set out for!! Once again, THEY ARE NOT LAZY!

GEMINI ASC:

Witty & charming.

Extremely smart and sociable.

Also can thrive in the entertainment industry as actors, writers, TV hosts, or comedians. They can really captivate an audience with their social and witty behavior!

Gemini rules the arms & hands, so they can have really nice hands/arms. If Venus is in aspect to their ASC, this can possibly point to someone who is a hand model.

The type to always want to be constantly stimulated and learn something everyday so they don't get bored.

May like to travel alot or move alot.

They also can marry more than once in their lives.

Extremely intellectual communicators. Very good with using their words as their best assets!

Could have big, wide eyes. This is just a personal take as I have seen multiple Gemini risings with big, wide eyes.

CANCER ASC:

Love security & comfort.

May have a oval face or round face. The moon rules Cancer so I won't be surprised if your face is shaped as round as the moon.

Sensitive to other's emotions & intuitive on how people may feel or react.

Amazing creatives. They use their emotions to make the best projects. Some of their projects (story writing for example) can be based on their lives at home or their hometown.

On the outside they may come off reserved and even cold. This is the "hard on the outside soft on the inside" effect. Deep down they are very soft, sweet, giving, & sensitive.

They want public recognition for their efforts, as you should!!!

According to Woolfolk, they are very good with saving money and handling it as well. Being the opposite sign of Capricorn (the sign of conservation), I am not surprised since opposing signs do share qualities of each other in one way or another.

LEO ASC:

Very grand people and luxurious YESSSS BITCH!!!

People may notice their hair first. Know how Leo is the lion? We see the lion's mane (or hair) first. This also applies for Leo ASCs.

A personal take- Leo ASC have this sun-kissed glow about them (lol pun intended). It's like their skin is so bright and glowy and it is so beautiful.

Give off a very happy and exuberant energy.

Extremely likeable people.

Views life as a stage!

Prides themselves on being a leader and delegator.

Can easily find fame or people will scout them out easily.

Also can be surrounded by alot of influential people. This helps their image if they want to be famous one day. Get to networking!!!

Can have a very nice back. Leo also rules the back.

VIRGO ASC:

Another personal take: why do so many Virgo ASC or Virgo placements have to wear glasses? That's interesting.

May have a frail looking body, but that does not mean they are sick yall.

Looks at life through a filter. Meaning, they like to hold on to valuable information that they can actually use and apply in their life.

^Yet, this can also mean that they may become too dependent on details to make decision. Don't forget to look at the bigger picture.

They love order and reason.

Thrive in intellectual pursuits. Especially if they are scientific and not philosophical.

Likes to gain rewards from their own efforts and not due to what others think. They love to listen and be assured in their own reasoning as YOU SHOULD!!!

May forget to take others' opinions into consideration.

Could come off shy and distant.

May own property in their later lives? Idk but Woolfolk mentions this and if anyone can chime in here I would be happy to hear it!

-That's it for PART 1! Part 2 will be out tomorrow!

-Also, to show your appreciation, do feel free to tip me! I have so much more content I want to teach and tell yall and I'm excited! You can tip me at my cashapp: $DellyRelly if you appreciate my content in more ways than just following me! Anywho, see yall tomorrow!

-Claude

[senualothbrok]

A GOOD PUN IS ITS OWN REWORD

@dekariosclan works her magic once again 🔮💜🤗

Some of Gale’s ✨Best Puns✨ collected by the amazing @senualothbrok from this massive audio clip, and featuring ADORABLE GALE CHIBIS drawn by her!!

As usual, all layout & design nonsense provided by yours truly. Magic provided by Gale. Book copies arriving at your local Sorcerous Sundries soon, email Gale’s publicist tara@waterdeep.com for more info.

[artsbysmarty]

A good pun is its own reword

SJHDS but also /deep sigh

[cosmicspaceslug]

given that 007 has been a successful franchise for six decades, would you describe him as an interest-bearing government Bond?

[1-800-roflmao]

Wash Day Delight Pt. 5

Rating:  General Audiences

WARNINGS:  None

Fandom:  Undertale (Video Game)

Relationships:  (Papyri Harem) Papyrus (Undertale)/Reader, Papyrus (Underfell)/Reader, Papyrus (Underswap)/Reader, Papyrus (Undertale) & Reader,  Papyrus (Underfell) & Reader

Characters:  Papyrus (Undertale), Reader, Edge (UF Pap), Blue (US Sans), Stretch (US Pap), Sans (Undertale), and Mentions of Other AU Skeletons

Add. Notes: Reader Is POC - mainly mixed/black coded with thick curly hair. I try to keep descriptions vague. Anyone is welcome to read.

*Papyrus has a moment to himself. Enter Sans, Blue, and Stretch. Edge proposes a toast.

**EDITED SINCE TUMBLR MIXED UP THE PARAGRAPHS

PREVIOUS || FIRST || NEXT

Papyrus was practically beaming at the opportunity he had caught by the horns that morning.  What a spectacular way to start his day!  He’d been only a little worried that she might shoot down his idea.  Okay, he had been very worried.  Especially considering she had explained she planned to do chores today as well.  Thank goodness, his brilliant mind was in tip top shape today!  And he didn’t have the little human here to fluster him.  It had also been lucky that Blue was there.  The excitable version of his brother had been quite eager to help him convince her to come over once he realized who he was texting and what was going on.

“REMIND HER HOW MUCH SHE LOVED OUR MASTER BATH!”  “SHE’S SUPPOSED TO BE PAMPERING HERSELF AND RESTING.  CHORES ARE NEITHER OF THOSE!”  “WE CAN ASSIST HER WITH THOSE CHORES IF THEY REALLY NEED TO BE DONE…”  “TELL HER I’LL GET MY BROTHER’S HOODIE FOR HER!”

That last suggestion he remembered had resulted in a long pause before Blue had laughed awkwardly under Papyrus’s questioning and only slightly judging gaze.  His judgemental gaze was soon pulled to his phone as she had replied with a wide-eyed emoji and then stars and then finally: 

Fluffy:  Promise?

He didn’t know whether to be impressed by Blue or disappointed in his friend that it had taken the simple promise of a hoodie to get her to agree so quickly.  Was it because it was Stretch’s specifically?  There was no way to tell since they had not offered anyone else’s clothing.  It stung for some reason.  Idly, he rubbed at his sternum to ease the odd pain away as he sent a reply back. 

CoolDude:  THE GREAT PAPYRUS! AND MALEFICENT BLUE! NEVER BREAK A PROMISE.

CoolDude:  WE’LL BE OVER IN JUST A FEW MINUTES TO PICK YOU UP

Fluffy:          Could you give me thirty?  

Fluffy:          I need to get dressed and pack a bag.

CoolDude:  OFCOURSE!  SEE YOU SOON!

Needless to say, it wasn’t long after the two had convinced her to come over that the whole household was made aware they would have a guest today in the family group chat.  Blue had run off to find his brother with a promise to come back in time to go.   Papyrus assumed he was going to try and convince his brother to give up his hoodie for the day.  They technically didn’t need it till later though.  Most likely she would be rushing off to the bathroom as soon as she stepped foot into their home.

Pocketing his phone, he settled into finishing the task Blue had been helping him with.  There were only a few more dishes left to clean from their late breakfast--brunch?  Was it still technically too early for brunch?  Shrugging, he lost himself in cleaning and tried not to watch the clock obsessively.  So hyper focused, he didn’t notice his brother shortcutting into the kitchen just beside him.

○●○●○●○●○

Sans just watched Papyrus currently wiping at the same spot on the counter for what seemed the umpteenth time.  “hey, bro, think you missed a spot,” he finally decided to make presence known.  He was rewarded with very on brand screech as his taller sibling nearly jumped through the ceiling in surprise.  Quite a feat considering they had purposely high ceilings.  

“SANS!!!”  Sans’ lazy perma smile just perked up as his brother stomped a foot and crossed his arms, sockets narrowing.   “WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT USING SHORTCUTS IN THE HOUSE?!”  Papyrus scolded, foot tapping away.  

“not to,” he answered without a care.  His tone said it all.   He’d do it again and again.  This was a war Papyrus would not win.  He bit back a laugh as his brother just sucked in a breath, palms pressed together in a praying motion in front of his teeth.  “aw, paps, come on, it’s not that bad,” he pleaded playfully.

“YOU ARE CORRECT,” Papyrus started and Sans arched a brow bone in mild surprise, “IT’S NOT THAT IT’S BAD.  IT IS SIMPLY FRUSTRATING THAT YOU HAVE TWO PERFECTLY FUNCTIONAL LEGS AND YET, YOU FIND EVERY OPPORTUNITY TO NOT USE THEM!” 

Sans just smiled in turn and that smile just stretched wider as he watched his brother literally flinch and glare even harder.  “NO.”  His sockets were practically curling with how big his smile was getting as Papyrus continued to command him to cease.  It was too late though.  It was already in motion.

“just trying to get a leg up on life, bro.”  It was like music to his nonexistent ears as Papyrus screeched that signature NYEH! of his.  He would have tossed a few more puns his brother’s way, but… “so, what has your spine in a twist?”  While he could guess what had his brother stressing--considering a certain human was visiting today--it did not hurt to ask.

His brother’s lazy pun had done its job to lighten his mood significantly.  He had expected more, but instead Sans had thrown a curveball.   The question was sobering.   He wasn’t stressed.  He wasn’t worried.  He wasn’t… right?   Picking up the rag he had used to clean the counters, he brought it to the sink and started ringing it out.  “MY SPINE IS PERFECTLY ALIGNED AS USUAL, SANS,” he replied, tossing the rag in to a small hamper just outside the connected laundry room.

Silence followed and he could feel his brother’s eyelights boring into his back.  “uh huh…” Yeah, that tone said he hadn’t believed a word of it.  Rather than pushing with words, his brother had settled for simply staring and tapping at the counter.  It was a battle of wills at this point.  

Just as the tapping of his brother’s phalanges against the countertop was starting to tick away his resolve, the tension was shattered as Blue reentered the kitchen with his own brother in tow.  Papyrus could hear the energetic version of  his brother nagging at his lazy self to wash his hoodie before lending it out.  Finally turning around, he aimed a bright smile at the swapped brothers; pointedly, he ignored his brother’s judging gaze.  “BLUE, I SEE YOU’VE SUCCEEDED IN CONVINCING YOUR BROTHER!” he declared, marching up to the two. 

A little amused huff escaped Blue, “DIDN’T TAKE MUCH CONVINCING HONESTLY,” he admitted.

“OH?” Papyrus looked to Stretch for elaboration and the other just gave an easy shrug.

“little miss has been eying my hoodie for a good bit,” he stated, an amused lilt to his voice, “was honestly surprised she never tried to sneak it or ask for it before now.”   

“SHE DIDN’T ASK FOR IT,” Papyrus found himself saying before he could think better of it.  It wasn’t a lie, but why did it feel like he said something mean.  That odd feeling was pressing at his sternum again.  

Stretch simply rolled the lollipop held in his jaws from one side to the other.  The hard candy clicking gently at the back of his teeth as he leveled a seemingly unbothered stare on his doppelganger, but Papyrus knew no matter how much the slouching brother seemed to act like his brother, he was still a Papyrus and Papyri were more observant than they often let on.  He knew those honey colored eye lights were searching for every little cue to put together the puzzle put before him.  

“THAT IS TRUE.  I DID OFFER IT,” Blue cut in, a shared moment of eye contact between the older brothers missed by the younger.  

 A little hum could be heard from Stretch as he straightened up with a roll of his shoulders in a mock stretch.  “hadn’t meant it to come off like that so let me reword,” he started with a short chuckle.  “she’d been wishing on all our sweaters and hoodies,” he amended, his lazy smile pulling up at the corners as he now had to look slightly down at his doppelganger without his usual slouch.

That ugly, heavy feeling wasn’t pressing as insistently after Stretch’s words.  “OH…” Papyrus hoped his voice came off as neutral.  Sadly, he could feel his magic betraying him as his cheekbones warmed.   

“you all can’t tell me you’ve never noticed,” he challenged the room, finally breaking his staredown with Papyrus as he looked to the other two occupants.

 Sans was the first to input his agreement with a shallow nod as he leaned on the counter.  “she tries to be subtle about it,” he remarked, an easy smile on his face as he rested his chin against his palm, “sneaking little glances here and there, dropping little hints…” His sockets closed with a happy curve as his deep laugh rumbled in his chest as he remembered the offhanded questions and shy beating around the bush their friend opted for instead of simply asking outright to borrow one of their jackets. 

Opening his sockets, he resumed watching his brother.  His light pink flush had dimmed and he had lifted a hand up to his mouth, digits curled as he seemed to be thinking.  He just smiled more as Papyrus seemed to be relaxing as he worked through his thoughts.  The more anecdotes they shared, the more his sockets seemed to widen with understanding.  

“LET’S NOT FORGET SHE HAD TRIED ACQUIRE YOUR SWEATER JUST LAST NIGHT, CREAMPUFF.”  Edge’s voice cut through the chatter.  They had all jumped and seemed to move as one to look at the sharp skeleton currently shutting the fridge door.  When had he come in?  Had they been so engrossed they had somehow missed him coming in?  Edge just smirked smugly at all of them as he carried the carafe of lemonade over to the island.

Sans just chuckled and turned his attention back to his brother.  His brow bones perking as he saw Papyrus’s smile wasn’t strained anymore and his tense posture had fled.  A glance to Blue and the other gave him the tiniest shrug before following it with a sneaky thumbs up.  Yeah, everything was good again.  Let’s not question it for now.  “hey, bro, don’t cha have a guest to pick up?” he commented.

The energetic duo both looked to the clock on the wall. A rather impressive synchronized gasp left the two. “NYEH!” “MWEH!” “WE’RE LATE!!”  The smaller skeleton just barely managed to catch the taller by the hand as he went to dash out the door.  “SORRY, PAPYRUS!  NO TIME FOR THAT!” Blue rushed out an apology before the smell of ozone filled the kitchen and barely a second later they were gone. 

○●○●○●○●○

“hey, Edge, mind pouring me a glass of that lemonade?” Stretch had settled at the island with a hopeful smile.  

   His request was met with a huff as Edge opened the cabinets above and retrieved a glass for himself, “POUR YOURSELF ONE, ASH TRAY.”  

The orange clad skeleton just hummed  around his lollipop before grabbing the sweet, honey flavored treat by it’s stick and removing it from his mouth.  “aww, why not?  you poured one for Sans there and he didn’t even ask,” he pouted playfully, gesturing to Sans who was nursing his glass of lemonade  just beside him. 

“don’t have to ask when you’re-” Both Papyri still in the room shot him a warning glare before he could even finish and he lifted his hands up in mock surrender.  “fine, fine , tough room,” he joked.  Edge just rolled his eyes, while Stretch let his glare linger a bit longer to make sure Sans didn’t try to sneak it in.

“I REFUSE TO WATCH YOU RUIN A PERFECTLY GOOD GLASS OF LEMONADE AGAIN,” the sharper skeleton stated as he poured his own glass and took a sip, sighing at the refreshing taste.  

Stretch feigned insult, “i’m not the only one who puts honey in their lemonade, edgelord.”

“NO, BUT I WOULDN’T SAY YOU ARE PUTTING HONEY IN LEMONADE WITH YOU,” Edge started, wrinkles forming on his nose ridge in disgust as he spoke, “NO, WITH YOU IT IS MORE ACCURATE TO SAY YOU PUT LEMONADE IN YOUR HONEY.”  He took a long sip like he could taste the sticky sweetness on his tongue and needed to wash it down.  

“you got me there,” Stretch popped his lollipop back in his mouth and settled in, laying against the counter with a resigned sigh.  He could hear Edge grumbling about how of course he was right.  Rolling his lollipop, he moved his attention back to Sans.  The prime doppelganger had simply been sitting quietly with an easy smile on his round skull.  As if sensing Stretch’s stare, his white eyelights locked with honey colored ones. 

“need something, pal?” The words held no threat or warning, just an invitation to ask away.

“what was up with your brother earlier?” Stretch already had a guess.  He just wanted confirmation at this point. The stout skeleton apparently had no plans to play along and just shrugged noncommittally.

“no clue what you’re talking about, Stretch,” Sans replied, finishing off his lemonade with a satisfied sigh, “thanks for the drink, Edge.”  He sent a genuinely thankful smile Edge’s way before the smell ozone once again filled the room and an empty glass was abandoned on the countertop before a now empty seat.

Edge fought down a smile that tugged at his teeth.  It wasn’t too hard with Stretch still in the room though.  Currently, the laidback skeleton was watching him with a curious look. “WHAT?” he snapped, scowling as a knowing grin was aimed at him.

“you’re in on it,” the other stated matter of factly.

“I AM IN ON NOTHING. AND QUIT THAT CLUELESS ACT,” Edge snipped, crossing his arms with a cocked hip, “I WAS THERE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE YOUR POSTURING EARLIER.”  It had been a surprise to see the usually passive skeleton standing to his full height and purposely towering over their prime version.  He cut off Stretch’s denial with a sharp growl, “I WON’T LISTEN TO BULLSHIT, STRETCH.”

Stretch just gave a defeated chuckle as he sat up in his seat.  “two for two today, Edge.  you’re on a roll,” he commended. 

Edge didn’t see nor hear any regret from his alternate.  The two simply took a moment to stare each other down.  A silent measuring up before the standing skeleton reached up into the cabinets and set down a new glass.  Curious honey eyelights watched as a lemonade was poured to only fill half the glass before it was slid over to him with a gentle push.  

 “what’s this?” Stretch questioned.  He leant forward in his seat and tilted his skull as he shifted his stare from the half full glass to Edge who was refilling his own.

“LEMONADE,” he answered smartly and Stretch didn’t bother restrain his rolling eyelights.

“i can see that.”

“THEN WHY ASK?” 

“you know that’s not wh-”

“JUST FILL IT WITH YOUR INFERNAL HONEY ALREADY,” Edge snapped, cutting Stretch off with an impatient scowl.  

Knowing he wouldn’t get anywhere with his darker counterpart, he fished in his pullover pocket and pulled out his signature bear shaped honey bottle.  Snapping the top, he upended the bottle over the glass and squeezed.  The viscous, thick amber liquid cut through the pale white lemonade and pooled at the bottom of the glass.  It took a minute to build the thick layer he wanted and once he was done, Edge handed him a spoon begrudgingly to stir his monstrosity.  Finished, he looked to Edge again questioningly only to see the other holding up his glass.  The sharp toothed skeleton had a cocky smirk on his skull, “IF YOU’RE SERIOUS ABOUT THAT CHALLENGE EARLIER, JUST KNOW YOU HAVE COMPETITION.”

Stretch was sure his jaw was on the floor as he realized what was going on.  He had known the tougher skeleton was soft on their human, but he hadn’t thought it went further than platonic interest.  That only left Willow and Mutt from the Papyri who seemed to show no romantic interest.  At least he hoped.  That may change considering today was the day for surprises.  Sucking in a breath, he sat up and raised up his own glass, tapping it against Edge’s with a less intense smirk of his own.  “noted,” he acknowledged, “but the true competitor is Creampuff, ya know.  you’ve seen those two together.”  

Edge nodded.  It was hard to miss the looks those two often sent to each other.  It could be absolutely suffocating at times to be in the same room as them when they start acting sweet and fluffy.  He took a moment before tapping his glass against Stretch’s for a second time, “A SECOND TOAST TO THE IDIOTS FINALLY WAKING UP,” before they each took a sip of their respective drinks.  

[cosmicspaceslug]

the annual flurry of guides to petting S.M.A.R.T. ghouls for the new year

don't forget to pet your ghouls

[godkilller]

@izzabizz139

I wanna hear you rant about the Gin vs Hitsugaya anime fight bc I love seeing your pov and you clearly write better than whoever extended that scene :) pretty please

          out of character.  DON’T ENABLE ME SO MUCH !!  No but I cackled when I first saw this ask because oh my god, clearly you saw a taste of my annoyance about the anime adaptation -- no, adaptation implies it was accurate, I’ll say the anime’s take was “inspired by” the manga’s quick run-in. I’ll start by saying this moment is supposed to be a bit important considering, via the audience’s point of view, THIS IS THE FIRST WE SEE OF TWO CAPTAIN-RANKED SHINIGAMI CLASHING. The only other captain-involved fight we’ve seen thus far in the manga is Kenpachi  ( who is an outlier and should not be counted... no, I joke... but, still, Ichigo was not an equal to him, his sword was sliced through like butter. )  The whole reason I enjoyed this encounter between Toshiro and Gin was simply this; it wasn’t some fancy multi-chaptered fight. IN THE MANGA, THERE ARE ONLY TWO BLOWS MADE. One, by Toshiro, to begin the fight. The second, to end it, is Gin’s strike.

          I want you to know that I’ve rewatched this specifically to answer this ask, and only due to this, as I wouldn’t have ever sought it out otherwise. HONOR MY SACRIFICE.

          Read more for length. I’m merciful.

          In the anime, they monologue at each other, and it’s mostly a combination of Toshiro making three separate death threats  ( he starts this off by saying “I’ll kill you before Hinamori arrives” and then goes on rewording it each time, and then also repeats the death-threat he gave Gin prior to this conflict about “I’ll kill you if Hinamori bleeds” )  and then also Gin and Izuru talking about how truly powerful and amazing Toshiro is -- no, this isn’t me being bitter or petty, I literally shit you not, Gin has a line that is legit “AS EXPECTED FROM HITSUGAYA TOSHIRO, CAPTAIN OF THE TENTH DIVISION, A CHILD PRODIGY OF TH' SORT THAT ONLY COMES ALONG ONLY ONCE EVERY FEW CENTURIES. HOW VEEEERY DANGEROUS. YOU’RE SERIOUS, AIN’T YA?” like don’t get me wrong, love a good sarcastic little shit comment like that, but the amount of times the anime pumps Toshiro up like he’s their shinest new cash cow ( and he is, at this point, it is not even 50 episodes into the series and they’ve realized everyone likes him and he’s jumped to high ranks in popularity polls... earning him filler spotlights, and eventually his very own non-canon movie )  so everything coming out of Gin’s mouth feels like more bullshit than necessary. Izuru’s already literally monologued, internally, how powerful and amazing Toshiro is anyways. Why this ?

          Not to mention that, prior to saying that long-winded shit, Gin’s haori changed length three times  ( and once it was longer than his entire body by several feet, and no not in a ‘to show motion’ way )  and most importantly Shinso was drawn, consistently, at katana-length for the duration of their little spat where the following, too, happened: Gin frog-leaps after doing a backflip, Toshiro gives Gin two (2) haircuts, Gin ruins some floorboards and gives Toshiro at least one splinter in his arm, Toshiro whilst wearing socks lands on Shinso’s blunt edge and pushes the sword down with his footsie because that’s how that works, there’s another backflip somewhere in there that Gin doesn’t need to be doing, twirl, twirl, and ballet, Gin’s face elongates until his chin is bigger than his face, Gin spends ten+ seconds purely dodging very close strikes to his face as Toshiro is the only one making breathy growly and ‘tsuuaaah’ sounds, there is a brief moment of no gravity as Toshiro keeps hacking at Gin midair and Gin blocks it over and over again but they still stay in the air but they’re not standing or jumping or using reiatsu they’re just like, momentum-locked I don’t fucking know, Gin frowny faces as he blocks because like somehow this kid who doesn’t even have more reiatsu than him, whose arm strength should not be an issue, is like. making him nervous?? as sword sparks fly. if you know me at all you know I hate when they fuckin’ firework sparkler-ify swords clashing.

          Anyways, all of this happens whilst Shinso is the wrong length and Gin’s hair is getting purpler by the second and this entire thing is somehow a big jack-off to Toshiro’s immense strength even though he’s screaming and wailing at Gin like a child and Gin’s just a vessel at this point to Enhance Toshiro, which, fine, okay, but at least be more accurate with it god damn. ANYWAYS,

          THEY JOUST. They literally run at each other, swords centered, and run past / to the side of one another. Jousting. “Cause that’s how that works. No slashes, no cutting motion. Just swords centered, because the animators were like “no worries guys I know swordfighting basics that’s a legit pose” yeah it is WHEN STATIONARY. Not rUNNING IT DOWN.

          And then Gin’s sleeve is cut, somehow, from the Jousting, because wow Toshiro wow wow wowowowow, and then Toshiro comes back and starts wailing at Gin again and Gin blocks it, again, and it’s all very annoyingly repetitive, and Gin’s frowning and sparks are flying and Gin’s using Shinso, the katana-length wakizashi I guess, with two hands because like I said, the animators knew basics and basics are “katana are used two-handed” like. Okay, you’re not wrong, but I cannot stress this enough: SHINSO IS NOT A KATANA. It’s shorter and meant to be used single-handed!!!! sTop!!! So then Gin rips off the tattered part of his sleeve and throws it at Toshiro, who swipes it away from his face using his Zanpakuto because that’s intelligent and a piece of cloth was definitely threatening enough to use your sword to bat it away  ( btw, Hitsugaya wasn’t holding his sword with two hands at this precise moment, so he could have just... used his other hand )  and then Gin goes in for the classic “stabby stabby rapidly at you while the animation gets a little breather because we repeat this cycle a few times with flashy bgs and phew money made” ... WE ARE FOUR MINUTES AND THIRTY SECONDS INTO THIS FIGHT BY THE WAY. Gin does this for seventeen (17) agonizing seconds straight. Yes, I counted. That was sixteen and a half too many seconds for me, personally.

          Toshiro somehow lassos Shinso whilst Gin is stabby stabby-ing with Hyourinmaru’s chain component. I say component like it’s somehow some type of beauty guru’s lipstick holder, but really am I that wrong ? When else has he ever used this feature ? Anyways, he lassos Shinso because yeehaw I guess, god I’m falling apart at this point can y’all tell????? I need a drink.

          and so, because now Toshiro has Gin’s sword somehow trapped with chain even though it’s just looped around it, he backflips over Gin for a cool trickshot, no blow issued, just vibes, and Gin uses a big brain moment to tug Shinso and the chains slide off. okay now what. We’re past five minutes into this fight, nonstop.

          SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD TIME FOR GIN TO PAUSE AND APPRECIATE TOSHIRO AGAIN! “I see, I shouldn’t have underestimated you, HItsugaya Toshiro” I’m starting to have a feeling Gin’s VA was told to just wing these lines because the amount of times he fills silences / Gin’s mouth movements with Toshiro’s long-ass name is astounding, he’s definitely drawing blanks here but he sure as hell knows one thing: that damn ice-boy’s name. He continues by saying “I suppose I’ll end up regretting it afterwards.”

          Toshiro says that’s not enough, and it’s really dramatic and cool. His eyes even glow all icy and blue and pretty, like his flowy reiatsu. Aesthetic points were gifted entirely to Toshiro’s animations in this scene. Gin was finished in MS Paint and each new scene they had to draw Shinso from memory and try to remember what hue of purple his hair was at gunpoint. Toshiro lets off a big wave of reiatsu and then it vanishes, and he jumps up reaaaally high. like this guy’s flying. his eyes arent glowing anymore that’s sad. Bring Back Glowing Eyes For Strong Shinigami 2k21.

          Toshiro releases his Shikai, and it’s badass, the sky darkens, Izuru looks distinctly more worried than usual, and Gin’s frowning with his teeth out like Bugs Bunny’s having a bad day, all is right in the world. Toshiro and his released Shikai have a nice moment for the Pics, and a big epic freeze frame blur moment happens with it all coiled and swirling around him. Wrow!  ( click the ‘wrow’ it’s a link to my exact reaction )  Izuru narrates for the third time about how powerful Toshiro is, his reiatsu, his Zanpakuto being a deity who is only unlocked every few centuries. The strongest ice-type sword. Pardon the pun, but that’s... you could say, so cool.

          It can even control the weather. So hey, next time it’s rainy, cold, icy, or snowing and you’re unhappy, it’s time to direct a big fuck you at Toshiro.

          Gin dodges the first dragon, and blocks the second with Shinso because blocking water and ice with a sword makes sense right? This actually takes a solid amount of seconds as Gin cuts through the entire length of this ice dragon noodle. Things dissipate, and pause, too, to really drag this out. Surprisingly, this reveals that Gin’s made a boo-boo, his left arm’s frozen, which doesn’t even mean anything because Gin is right-handed, and Toshiro teleports himself behind Gin in true fighty fashion.

          We have arrived at seven minutes and just under twenty seconds of this fight, and Gin turns, DOES THE UNTHINKABLE, gasp! He opens his eyes. His red, dull, evil, gray-eyebrowed with purple hair eyes, and shoots Shinso through its hideout spot behind his haori. This nearly takes off Toshiro’s eye and upwards of his head, but the little guy dives down fast. The rest happens in slow motion, supposedly, because it takes an eternity and people talk entire full sentences in its span of time.

          Gin asks Toshiro if he’s sure he’d like to dodge that  ( it’s a little late for that ) and says that Momo’ll die if he does. SHINSO SCRAPING ALONG AGAINST HYOURINMARU STRANGELY MAKES NOT A SINGLE SOUND. Mute. Even though before they had no problem animating and adding sounds to them smacking blades earlier. There are soundless sparks though, so there’s that. Yay. Can you tell how exhausted this’s made me? I need a nap.

          Shinso is already more than halfway towards Momo, still unconscious, she most definitely has a serious concussion via Toshiro backhanding her midair consider she’s been unconscious for longer than ten minutes. Toshiro has time to get up off the floor where he dropped to dodge, realize with a shocked gasp, turn, shout her name, and watch as Rangiku arrives in a random glow of gold which never happens ever again and blocks the attack with Haineko. Haineko almost cracks on the impact, and continues growing in damage as Rangiku holds Shinso there, implying that she’s stopped it from reaching one-hundred sword’s lengths to pierce Momo. Yes I’m including that implication / note in here because we love to see Rangiku succeeding in life and being Not-Helpless, all while potentially damaging Haineko severely if it wasn’t able to hold him off. Yikes, Gin!

          Rangiku threatens to join the fight if he doesn’t withdraw his sword. Gin smiles, withdraws it, and then Shunpos away.

          Whatta mess. Oh, and the anime fight was pretty fucked up, too.

          This is a long post, but here’s the manga version:

Toshiro leaps into the air,

This is where the fight actually starts between them:

And end. 

Five pages. Two blows. Does not equate to ten minutes of non-stop fighting and monologues. Sometimes, and I mean this in the most unbiased way possible, less is more.

[sanguinarysanguinity]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson (TV 1980) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Sherlock Holmes, John Watson, Lestrade (Sherlock Holmes), Original Non-Human Character(s) Additional Tags: Pundamentally Awesome, A Pun is Its Own Reword Summary:

Satisfying the Inspector's toast is jammed difficult.

A @holmestice gift for @scfrankles!

[gyakutengagotoku]

GS4 vs AJ:AA - Episode 3, Part 2

Good, I’m not having problems with tumblr this time.

This one’s a bit on the shorter end, which I notice goes for many day 1 trials in cases with more than one trial day, but I can still find plenty of things to share, comment, and explain as always! Like with the previous episode, most of the bulk of work was from the introductions and initial setting.

While the previous one, I could squeal over Yakuza references and all that jazz, this one’s more for Klavier’s fans and classic rock junkies out there. I enjoy the occasional taste of rock too, but sorry, I’m forever a Eurobeat gal.

Oh, if only there were a future AA case about street racing... You just know that Edgeworth would be on that case. He’s probably the only prosecutor (besides maybe Klavier) who can make a sick drift and would know a thing or two about cars. Too bad for the car-less defense attorneys at the Wright Anything Agency, though.

--

> Courtroom

> 1st Witness Testimony, press 1st statement

<Apollo> “なくした”っていう発想は ないのかな。 Isn't it possible he simply misplaced them?

<Klavier> “なくした”で済むか！ Misplaced them!?

カギはその後、死体の手に ニギられていたんだぞ！ Misplaced items don't just wander into a murder victim's hand on their own!

<Judge> な。なんですって‥‥！ そ。それでは‥‥ What's this!? Prosecutor Gavin, if your keys were in the victim's hand...

ハンニンはあなた自身ということに なるではないですかッ！ That makes you a prime suspect!

<Klavier> ‥‥♪　“遅効性の恋は アトロキニーネ”‥‥ ..."Love, slow-acting and new. Atroquinine... is waiting for you..."

<Trucy> ハナウタ、歌ってます。 He's singing something.

<Apollo> 大物だよな。なんにしても。 Does everything with this guy have to be so over-the-top?

Just wanna share lyrics. The original line, taken literally, is "Slow-acting love [is like] Atroquinine", but it's so vague that it can be reworded many ways, since it’s a song lyric.

> Press 4th statement

<Klavier> 部屋から脱出できる出口は、 あの通気口だけだった！ That air vent was the only way out of the room!

そして、そこには、 被告人の指紋が残っていた！ The defendant's fingerprints were found on the grill!

‥‥さあ、おデコくん！ ...Well, Herr Forehead?

ここから、キミは どんな“物語”を想像するかい？ What fairy tale does this suggest to you?

<Apollo> ぐ‥‥ッ！ Urk...!

<Klavier> ‥‥ちなみに。その通気口‥‥ Only one could pass through that vent, that "doorway to heaven"...

“天国のトビラ”をくぐることが できたのは‥‥その妖精だけ、さ。 ...and that one is our pixie.

Another song reference, but instead of a "Stairway to Heaven", it's a vent-way.

I've been watching way too much Among Us lately... but this episode from back in 2007 seems suspiciously related to a 2018 game, somehow.

> Finish pressing, present any evidence

<Apollo> 検察側の主張をくつがえす‥‥ これが、その証拠品です！ This evidence does more than contradict, it flips the whole case on its head!

<Judge> ‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥ ......

<Klavier> どうやら、ぼくの言った通り。 ハッキリとした“反証”のようだね。 Thank you for presenting evidence that is both clear and plain, as requested.

<Judge> たしかに‥‥ ハッキリ“ちがう”と分かります！ Yes... Clearly and plainly wrong!

その証拠品で、検察側の主張を くつがえすことはできません！ I'm afraid the only thing flipped on its head here was you as a child, Mr. Justice.

<Apollo> （うう‥‥ちがったのか‥‥） (Ugh... I guess that wasn't it.)

Savage, Your Honor! The original line seems a bit disappointing in comparison: "This evidence doesn't overturn the prosecution's case at all!" That said, it does give me an idea for where the "flip on its head" phrasing came from.

> Select "no proof"

<Apollo> 反証のジュンビは‥‥ あ、ありません。 I... don't have contradicting proof, actually.

<Judge> そうですか。 それでは、さっさと判決を‥‥ Too bad. Very well, this court finds the defendant...

<Hold it!>

<Trucy> ま、待ってください！ W-Waaait!

<Judge> な、なんですか。 Wh-What for?

<Trucy> 弁護側には‥‥えーと。 は、“はんしょー”でしたっけ？ We have, uh, what was it called? Contradictual proof?

と、とにかく！ ジュンビがありますッ！ Anyway, whatever it is, we've got it!

Meanwhile, I think this line from Trucy seems a bit out of place when "contradicting proof" isn't a very difficult phrase to say. Maybe they could have thrown in something sillier like "contradicting poof- I mean, proof!" and it'd work pretty well. In JP, she's still learning her words and especially kanji, so she usually pronounces words correctly, but doesn't write them out in the text.

I like to think that whenever Odoroki speaks and uses phrases that she isn't as familiar with, she actually breaks the fourth wall and takes notes on his textboxes. Hey, learning from your peers is a great way to study! Learning Japanese with your fave Ace Attorney characters is even better.

> Ask for new witness

<Apollo> 牙琉検事‥‥ まちがいありませんか？ Prosecutor Gavin, you claim that there were no witnesses to this crime.

『この事件に、 　目撃者はいなかった』‥‥ Are you absolutely sure?

<Klavier> マチガイないね。‥‥誓ってもいい。 この検事生命と‥‥ Absolutely. I'd swear it on my career as a prosecutor...

１００万枚を売り上げたヒット曲、 《恋のアトロキニーネ》にかけて。 And on my million-seller hit song "Atroquinine, My Love".

<Trucy> ‥‥さりげなく ジマンされちゃいましたね。 ...There he goes again.

<Apollo> ザンネンながら‥‥ この事件には、目撃者がいたのです。 That's too bad, because there was a witness.

Minor tweaking to song titles again. It was "Atroquinine of Love" before.

> 2nd Witness Testimony, present at 3rd statement, Perceive at 6th statement but point wrongly

<Apollo> あなたのココロの動き‥‥ オレには分かるんですよ。 You may have seen the world, but I've seen your heart.

あなたは、今の証言をするとき、 動揺していましたね！ You were flustered during your testimony just now!

<Lamiroir> ‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥ ......

<Lamiroir> あなたの言っていることが、 よく分からないのですが‥‥ I do not understand what it is you are saying.

それは、日本語のジョーク か何かですか？　さっぱりです。 Perhaps this is a joke, in your culture?

Making a note here about culture: It's characteristic of Japanese that since they have so many homophones and alike-sounding words or phrases, it's fairly simple to come up with puns out of the blue. You hear it all the time with Japanese comedians and writers who just can't help themselves and have to throw in a pun here or there. And because they can show up so suddenly, it can catch the audience off-guard, so they're more likely to appreciate the humor.

Relatively speaking, of course; as with any language, there are also those kinds of puns that are super obvious and cringy when delivered. As a language buff myself, I'm still fascinated with what goes into creating puns in the first place, whether or not they're cringy or clever.

> Present evidence to Lamiroir's contradiction to her own testimony

<Apollo> そして、こうも証言しました。 事件については“何も見ていない” Furthermore, you testified that you had "seen nothing".

<Lamiroir> ‥‥！ ...!

<Apollo> お分かりですね‥‥ レタス氏が“撃たれた”ことを‥‥ Yet you knew that Mr. LeTouse had been shot!

あなたが、 知っているはずがないのです！ How could you have known!?

<Lamiroir> ！　‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥ ...!

<Lamiroir> きゃあああああああああああッッ！ Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeoooooooowrk!

<Judge> ラミロアさん！ Lamiroir!

‥‥あなた、まさか。 何かをかくしているのでは‥‥ You aren't hiding something from this court, I hope!

<Lamiroir> ‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥ ......

<Apollo> （ラミロアさんはウソをついた‥‥ 　ゼッタイに何かを隠している！） (That sweet song of hers was sounding a little too sweet!)

So, I'm not sure why Lamiroir's cries were localized to this. It sounds like something so out of place from someone whose voice is so beautiful and melodic usually. Maybe that was the point? Like, it's a subtle nod to sudden record-scratches or sudden cuts in a piece of music?

Fyi, Odoroki's last line here was simply: "(Lamiroir-san was lying... She has to be hiding something!)"

> Press newest (7th) statement

<Apollo> ほんの少ししか見ていないのに、 よく“弾痕”だと分かりましたね。 Only a glimpse, yet you knew they were bullet holes?

<Lamiroir> ‥‥‥‥ええ。 一目で分かりましたわ。 Yes. I recognized them immediately.

以前にも、銃の弾痕を、 見たことがありますから‥‥。 I have seen bullet holes before, you know.

<Klavier> アナタは歌い手として、 世界中を回られていますからね。 You have traveled the world as a singer...

この国よりも治安の悪い地域で、 歌われることもあるでしょう。 You must have sung in places far more dangerous than our country.

<Lamiroir> わたくしの歌が必要とされるならば、 どこにでも行かせていただきますわ。 I go wherever my voice is needed. Those places... are many, these days.

<Trucy> かっこいいですね！　ラミロアさん。 みぬきも、いつかは海外に出たいな。 That's really cool! I hope I get to travel like Lamiroir some day.

<Klavier> ぼくも、レコーディングは 海外ですると決めていますよ。 I plan on recording my next album overseas.

むこうのスタジオは、 音のヌケがちがいますからね。 Their studios have a different sound, you know.

<Apollo> （へえ‥‥それは、発声練習にも 　良さそうだな‥‥） (Hmm. Maybe I should go on a Chords of Steel tour, too.)

And this last line is totally different. "(Huh... it sounds like they'd be great for vocal training too...)"

("Far more dangerous", huh... Maybe she previously had a tour in the Republic of Zheng Fa... and maybe the Kingdom of Khura'in too.)

> 3rd Witness Testimony, finish pressing, select "There's a problem"

> 4th Witness Testimony

<Apollo> （すっかり忘れていた‥‥ 　オレの知らないところで‥‥） (I admit, I'd forgotten about the song...)

（そんなトンでもないオチが 　ついていたなんて！） (But there it is now, waiting for me... the grand finale, as it were.)

<Trucy> あ！　それに最初に気がついたの、 みぬきですからね、みぬき！ Hey! You know I was the one who first noticed that!

<Judge> “歌詞”に合わせて殺人など‥‥ I've heard of jumping rope to songs, and counting to songs...

“かぞえ歌”と“手まり歌”だけの 世界だと思っていました！ ...But killing!?

<Klavier> 世界は、おジイさんが 思っていたより広い、ってコトだね。 It's a wild world out there, Herr Judge.

<Judge> それでは！ Very well!

この、ナゾの歌を踏まえた上で、 尋問をおねがいします！ We've heard one song and dance, let's get on to the next: the cross-examination!

<Apollo> （ベツに、歌にはナゾはないと 　思うけど‥‥） (I'm not so sure I'm going to be doing much singing...)

By the way, "手まり歌" (temari uta) is roughly like playing handball to a song. A temari is a ball of usually extra kimono cloth wrapped together with fabric. Over Japanese history, it went from a handmade toy to embroidery art. Link to Wikipedia.

Also, "Wild World" is a 1971 hit song by Cat Stevens too. With all the talk of songs, I figured the loc team might have been able to slip in a subtle nod.

Last couple lines there: "Let's build on this mystery song and begin the cross-examination!" "(I don't think the song itself is the mystery here, though...)"

10/21/20 edit: Ash has enlightened me to one of Takumi’s inspirations. Like Agatha Christie’s And There Was None and Van Dine’s The Bishop Murder Case, where a murder seems to follow a nursery rhyme, a classic Japanese mystery novel by Seishi Yokomizo, Akuma no Temari Uta, is a murder mystery that follows the rhymes of a song.

And now looking into his works, I just realized this man is also the legend who wrote the iconic private eye Kosuke Kindaichi. Yeah, the same guy who’s said to be the grandfather to the MC of the Kindaichi Case Files manga, by Yozaburo Kanari. What a small world we live in, after all.

> Press 1st statement

<Klavier> なかなか悪くないじゃないか、 刑事クン。イイ声してるよ。 Bravo, Fräulein Detective. Your singing... it's not bad.

‥‥そして、最後のパート。 Now, for the finale!

“Ｇｕｉｔａｒ，Ｇｕｉｔａｒ‥‥ 　ふたりは空へ” "Guitar, Guitar... Up together to the sky."

この歌詞の通り、 盗まれたレタス氏の死体は‥‥ As it says in the lyrics, Mr. LeTouse...

“空高く”そびえるステージ の上で発見された。 ...was found with a guitar, high in the "sky" over the stage.

どうだい？　これだけ一致してたら。 もう偶然とはいえないさ。 No series of coincidences could be so well conceived!

<Ema> ‥‥カガク的に言ってもね。 He's right. ...Scientifically speaking.

<Apollo> （‥‥一体、 　なんのコンサートだよ‥‥） (What would Wocky have said? ..."That concert was wack.")

<Trucy> あんな風に気持ち良さそうに 歌われたら、反論できませんね‥‥ It's hard to argue when she pours her heart into it like that.

<Ema> ‥‥えーと。と、とにかく！ 犯人は‥‥ Ah, er, ahem! Anyway, the shooter...

Aw, I really wish I could have actually heard Ema sing... or at least hear her textbox beeps change in tone to the music. That would be a bit of extra coding work, though.

By the way, Odoroki was talking about: "(...What kind of concert was this supposed to be...?)"

> Press 4th statement again

<Ema> おそらく、犯人と被害者の距離は、 ２メートルもなかったはずです。 Furthermore, there was no more than five feet between shooter and victim.

これは、ハズすほうが ムズカシイぐらいの距離です。 Hard to miss at that distance.

<Trucy> でも、マキさんは、 目が不自由だったから‥‥ But, Machi can't see...

<Ema> おそらく、“音”と“気配”に たよって、撃った‥‥ He would have had to use sound and other senses to aim...

だから、ハズれたのでしょう。 ...and miss.

<Klavier> ‥‥部屋には大音量で ぼくたちのナンバーが流れていた。 And our music was blaring over the room monitor.

音を聞くには、 不利な状況だったと言えるよ。 Not the best circumstances for aiming by sound.

<Ema> だから‥‥ハンニンは、 目が見えなかった人物‥‥ Which makes it very likely that the shooter was blind.

<Klavier> これが、検察側の主張だよ‥‥ Thus the prosecution's position.

<Ema> うーん！　やっぱり、 カガク的説明って気持ちいいわね！ Ahh! Nothing like a scientific explanation to get the blood pumping!

<Apollo> （今は、 　まったく同意できないよ‥‥） (Why's mine frozen in my veins, then...?)

It was just "(I can't agree with that sentiment at all...)" but I also wanted to make a joke about about "Apopsico".

> Press 5th statement

<Apollo> か、歌詞になぞらえた殺人だって、 じゅうぶん、非カガク的です！ What's so scientific about a murder to lyrics!?

<Ema> 何よ！　それぐらい‥‥カガクで 解明できるに決まってるでしょ！ Lyrics can be explained scientifically!

<Ema> カガクを甘く見ると‥‥ ケガするわよッ！ ...Never underestimate the power of science!

<Apollo> （うわ！　指紋検出粉のビンを、 　ふりかぶりながら言うなよ‥‥） (Put that bottle of finger- printing powder down before you hurt someone, like me!)

じゃ、じゃあ！ 解明してみせてくださいよ！ OK, then explain it! Scientifically!

<Ema> ‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥ ......

まあ。それには、まだデータが 足りないかな‥‥ I require more data.

<Apollo> （なんだよ、それ！） (Hah! Likely story...)

"(What kind of weak excuse is that!?)"

> Press 6th statement

<Ema> そのことは、楽屋にいた全員に 知らされていました。 Everyone backstage was told about the maintenance.

だから‥‥当然。 マキさんも知っていた。 ...Including Machi Tobaye.

キャタツをのぼれば‥‥そこに、 “脱出口”がある、と‥‥ He would have known that there would be a way out at the top of that stepladder.

<Apollo> そ、そんな‥‥！ 今、初めて聞きましたよ！ But that's... Why is this the first time I'm hearing about this!?

<Klavier> ‥‥なぜ、あんなところに キャタツがあったか‥‥ You could have figured it out for yourself.

それを考えれば、 カンタンにわかると思うけどね。 You only needed to consider what that stepladder was doing there.

<Judge> ‥‥どうやら、弁護人の異議は、 キャタツに押しつぶされたようです。 ...Looks like the defense's objection has been squished by a stepladder.

<Klavier> どうかな？　おデコくん‥‥ Well, Herr Forehead?

もう、この証人の主張を ひっくり返す武器はないのかい？ Out of ammunition, perhaps?

<Apollo> （‥‥なんだ？　この、牙琉検事の 　挑戦的なタイド） (I've never seen Prosecutor Gavin so... so aggressive!)

（なんか、“不自然”な気が‥‥） (Maybe he's caught the scent of blood...)

That last line has gotten a bit more dressing to it. It went "(Maybe he's caught onto something 'unnatural'...)"

> Accept the prosecution's challenge, but present wrongly

<Judge> ‥‥‥‥‥‥‥‥ ......

<Judge> その証拠品に、検察側の主張を 崩すチカラがあるとは思えません。 I'm not sure that overturns anything, Mr. Justice.

<Apollo> （うう。ちがったのか‥‥） (Ugh. Wrong evidence, I'm guessing...)

<Klavier> オドロキ・イズ・ブラインド‥‥ 何も見えてないのは、キミだったね。 Apparently both love... and Justice are blind.

<Apollo> （考えるんだ！ 　何でもいい‥‥何かないのか！） (I have to think! There must be something... anything!)

"Odoroki Is Blind... Seems like you're the one who can't see anything."

(I capitalized that because Kyouya said it in English.)

> Present photo of crime, point out the contradiction, Klavier takes the lead

<Klavier> ‥‥お楽しみはこれからだよ。 おデコくん。 This is where the real fun begins, Herr Forehead!

<Apollo> ぎゃああああああああああああああ あああッ！ Yeeeeaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrggh!

<Klavier> ‥‥さすがに、ヒトが悪かったかな。 I knew you didn't have what it took.

<Ema> サイテーです！ You... You jerk!

あたし、ナニしに来たか わからないじゃないですか！ Just what was I in here for? Comic relief!?

<Trucy> そうですよ！　あやまりなさい！ Yeah! Apologize!

<Klavier> はっはっはっ。 いやいや、ごめんね。 Ah ha ha. Oh, sorry!

<Trucy> なんですかそれ！ ちゃん���アタマさげる！ That's no way to apologize!

<Apollo> （やれやれ‥‥タイヘンな騒ぎに 　なっちまったな） (He's angered the Trucy now. Look out...)

"(Oh boy... This trial has turned into one huge ruckus.)"

> Point out reason why Machi had to pretend to be blind (or not, it continues either way)

> 5th Witness Testimony, press 1st statement

<Apollo> どうして見えなくなったのかも、 分からないのですね‥‥ So, you don't know why you went blind?

<Lamiroir> ‥‥その通りです。 ...I do not.

もしかすると、生まれつき 見えなかったのかもしれませんわ。 I may have been born this way, in fact.

<Klavier> ‥‥彼女の過去について、 余計なセンサクは無用だよ。 ...It's fruitless to attempt to pry into her past.

これは、きわめてデリケートな モンダイだからね‥‥ And, I might add, it's a delicate subject.

<Judge> 弁護人にデリケートを期待するのは、 少々ムリがありますからな。 I'm not sure we can reasonably expect Mr. Justice to do anything delicately.

<Apollo> （シツレイな‥‥ 　たしかにあまり自信はないけど） (Hey! Why I oughta... take a deep breath and calm down.)

"(Hey... though I actually don't have much confidence about that either.)"

> Press 5th statement

<Judge> 《もくげきしゃ‥‥めがみ》 でしたかな。 "The witness... siren"?

何度も聞かされましたぞ。 弁護人の、迫真のモノマネつきで。 We've heard them many times. Along with a little play-acting by our defense.

<Klavier> 最後のコトバは、死神にノドを つかまれて、闇に消えてしまった。 I remember them well myself, but that statement is not to what I refer.

‥‥あのコトバには、 “つづき”があったんだよ。 I mean what he said before that.

<Apollo> “つづき”‥‥ （“めがみ”につづくコトバ‥‥） ...Before? (What came before that...?)

あッ！ Ack!

<Klavier> ‥‥そう。レタス氏は、 こう言おうとしていたんだよ。 ...That's right. He tried to tell you.

《事件のことは、目撃者に聞け。 　ただし‥‥その証人は‥‥》 When he said "can't see" he wasn't talking about himself.

《“目が見えないぞ”》 ‥‥ってね。 He was talking about the witness!

<Judge> めがみ‥‥えない‥‥ “目が見えない”ですか‥‥ッ！ I see!

<Klavier> “目が見えない”のは、 ラミロアさんだけではなかったねえ。 Too bad the defense did not.

どうだい？　おデコくん。 Well, Herr Forehead?

少しは落ち着いて、モノゴトを よく“見て”みたらどうかな。 Try relaxing and "looking" at the facts first next time.

<Apollo> ‥‥ぐうッ！ ...Urk!

For this entry, it's entirely a matter of how LeTouse's last words had to be translated. The original Japanese script didn't leave a lot for him, and there were places where it was quite ambiguous. As it turns out, he wasn't saying "megami", as in "Goddess", but "me ga mienai", as in "unable to see".

"It was... 'The witness... Megami', if I recall. We've heard them many times, with a little play-acting by our defense." "His final words, just before Death clasped on his throat and he was consumed by darkness. ...Those words had something 'following' them." "('Following'... 'Megami'...?) Ah!" "...That's right. This is what LeTouse-san was telling you: 'Ask the witness about the incident. However... that witness...' 'cannot see.' "Megami... enai... You mean, 'me ga mienai'...!?" "Though, it wasn't just Lamiroir-san who 'didn't see'."

> Finish pressing

<Judge> ‥‥ごくろうさまでした、眉月刑事。 たいへん、参考になりました。 Thanks for looking into that for us, Detective Crescend. It's a great help.

<Daryan> いやいや。 かまいませんよ、裁判長さん。 Oh, no problem at all, Your Honor.

‥‥それじゃ、オレはこれで‥‥ ...I'll be heading out...

<Hold it!>

<Lamiroir> 待ってください‥‥！ Wait!

<Judge> ど。どうかしましたか？ ラミロアさん‥‥ La-Lamiroir! Is something the matter?

<Lamiroir> 今の、その声‥‥ That voice just now...

<Klavier> ダイアンが、なにか‥‥？ Daryan?

<Lamiroir> ミスター・ダイアン‥‥ というのですか。 Mr. Daryan, is it...?

‥‥‥‥‥‥彼、です。 まちがいありません。 ............ It was him. I am sure of it.

<Judge> “彼”‥‥なにが、ですかな‥‥？ It was "him"?

<Klavier> ‥‥ッ！　ま。まさか‥‥ Y-You aren't saying--!?

<Lamiroir> ２発の銃声を聞いたとき‥‥ レタスさんと話していた声‥‥ That voice I heard, talking to Mr. LeTouse... when I heard the gunshots fired.

そう。今の方です！ ミスター・ダイアン！ It was him! It was Mr. Daryan!

Just making a point here since I forgot to last post: Lamiroir and later Machi are the only ones who still call people using "Mr." in English, in the JP script. However, for the briefest moment here, she refers to Mr. LeTouse with the general -san suffix instead, and I don't think this was something that was simply overlooked, since the line immediately after, where she accuses Daryan/Daian, she goes back to using "Mr." Perhaps Lamiroir is getting more and more in-tune with her other language outside of Borginese?

--

...I'm still sticking to my Poland theory, but they could be like a mix of Poland, Hungary, Slovakia... around there in Eastern Europe.

[cosmicspaceslug]

cute pics of snuggling rats are my Copiang mechanism

Hey, you. I… I couldn’t help but notice you are having a rough day… May I offer you some snuggie rats in consolation?