#a “we can both be in the kitchen without bumping into each other because we are so familiar w each others movements” if you will

[jeonstudios]

fontana di trevi | 02

you seek out a vampire to help you with something.

pairing: vampire!jk x sadgirl, blood donor!reader

genre: vampire au, angst, fluff (really a sadgirl fic lol)

word count: 9k

warnings: same as last time basically: blood, needles, suicidal thoughts and intentions

rating: NC-17 – Adults Only

masterlist

part 2/2

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© between takes is copyright jeonstudios. this fic can not be modified, re-posted, or translated without my permission.

“Thanks,” you smile politely as you close the car door, hearing the Uber drive off behind you. The walk up to the house is no different than last time, yet it definitely feels different. Both because of what happened almost a week ago, but also since you’re hoping this will be the last time.

What certainly is different is the surprised look on the vampire’s face as he opens the door to see you standing there with your hands in the pockets of your winter coat.

He himself is wearing a black hoodie, and once again, black shorts. His hair looks a little messier than how you’re used to seeing it. Almost like he’s been sleeping. Vampires don’t sleep, though, do they?

“I… didn’t think you’d show,” he admits honestly, nonetheless opening the door wider for you, and as you enter, you can’t help but think that he looks… almost cuddly.

Of course, he still gives off the usual intimidating aura, and he should probably be even scarier to you considering what happened last time you met him, but… you don’t know. Perhaps you’re just so deprived of human touch that a bloodthirsty vampire’s cold embrace seems inviting.

This time, he waits in the hallway while you step out of your shoes and remove your coat. 

“Yeah, I still want this. I just… wasn’t prepared,” you explain rather vaguely, knowing that he understands exactly what you’re getting at anyway. You want to die but on your terms.

“It wasn’t my intention. To do what I did.”

You meet his eyes. It’s not an outright apology, but it feels eerily close to one.

“You were there to… feed, weren’t you?”

He nods. “Didn’t get the chance to on Thursday or Friday.”

It’s your turn to nod in understanding. For a short moment, you stand there, looking at each other. 

Until you break the silence. “So, can we start?”

“Sure,” he agrees, turning around to head toward the kitchen.

Like the first time you showed up to his house when he didn’t think you were going to, he has to bring the supplies from wherever he keeps them. You take your spot at the table, slip off your cardigan, and wait.

The vampire returns with his hands full, placing the stuff down on the table before he pulls out another chair and positions it the same way as always. But his focus lies on your skin.

“These are new bruises?” he asks, carefully grasping your hand and very gently lifting it to better inspect the yellowing marks covering your skin. “You always bruise like this after?”

You follow his gaze. There are currently three bruises on your right arm, none the same as the night he almost killed you. Two are yellow and from when you bumped into a dresser at home a few days ago. The third is purple but smaller and its origin a mystery. If he wanted to see bruises, he should’ve seen the ones on your legs after you fell when he attacked you.

“Not the first time, but yeah. Usually just from the needle site, but lately, it’s all over. I guess I’m a little deficient in something,” you joke quietly, but the vampire doesn't laugh. 

“Why does it interest you so much? Do you have some kind of medical degree?” you ask, thinking back to when he first asked you why you didn’t wonder about his apparent knowledge.

“Not officially, but being dependent on humans like we are to some extent, you tend to pick up on stuff, and having been around as long as I have, it’s even more unavoidable. But I’ve never seen bruising this severe from blood loss.”

Fair enough. Your body should definitely try to keep the little blood remaining inside your veins, where it belongs. 

He starts prepping your arm, but instead of looking away, you close your eyes. Are you imagining things or has he been… softer lately? Making sure you got home safely instead of leaving you to your fate, almost worrying about your bruises, and being gentler in the way he attaches the needle? Then again, he’s only making sure you can give him as much blood as possible, and he also would’ve probably killed you if he’d gotten ahold of you last week.

“I take it you’ve killed before?” 

There’s a few seconds of silence, but then he answers, and there’s nothing hidden in his words or voice that reveals something more.

“I have.”

“How do you…,” you start, unsure of how to phrase your question. “I mean, what do you do… after?”

“Are you asking…?”

“How do you… dispose of them? And… I guess, how will you dispose of… me?”

It’s not really a sensitive question for you, so you’re not sure for whose sake you’re so careful. You doubt the vampire really cares.

You hear him exhale. “I guess it depends on the circumstances. I haven’t planned anything.”

You wince when he sticks you, more painful this time for some reason. The ball is placed in your hand like always, and you start to squeeze it.

Your curiosity isn’t that dire, so you’re not disappointed by his answer. Maybe he’s not even being honest, and it’s for your sake? Which brings you back to why he’s being extra gentle. The only other explanation you can think of is that he feels sorry for you. Maybe he just truly wants to spare you unnecessary pain and worry in the last moments of your pathetic life? Because this is it. With how shitty you’ve been feeling these last couple of weeks and especially since last time, you know it won’t be long. Today’s the day.

One bag. He can take one bag and after that he’ll have to end it. That way, you don’t have to bleed out, and he’ll get as much blood as possible. If he takes your advice about how to drain the rest, well, that’s up to him.

You’re startled by the sound of knocking, opening your eyes to see the vampire rise from his chair, seemingly sharing your surprise. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

Nodding, you close your eyes again, getting as comfortable as you can in the chair while wondering who’s at the door. A vampire friend? A vampire partner? Surely, he doesn’t hang out with humans on the regular? You always got the impression, both from him and vampires in pop culture, that they don’t really care for humans. In fact, a dirty human only pesters a vampire’s environment unless they’re actively dying.

Your heart hurts. It’s beating heavily inside your chest, a feeling you’ve grown somewhat used to over the weeks, but it feels undeniably worse. Like every beat is a painful and exhausting accomplishment. Your breaths grow heavier too. 

Surely, it’s been more than a minute. Is he on his way back? If he were a human, chatting with another human at the front door, maybe you would’ve heard them, but you can’t discern anything. 

It feels a little like your head’s in the clouds, and you’re not sure if your eyes are still closed or if they’re open and you just can’t see anything. You have a feeling that not only can’t you hear the vampire, you can’t hear anything anymore.

Realizing that this is it, you try to call for him quietly to tell him so, but although you’re pretty certain you’re dying, for some reason, you don’t want to interrupt whatever he’s doing with his visitor.

“Fine, alright, I’ll talk to him, but please, this is not a good time.”

“But he’s being an ass, and you were the last person he spoke to before he left for fucking Iceland.”

Jeongguk rolls his eyes at his friend, Yuqi. With how much she and Taehyung love each other, there’s a surprising amount of drama. 

“I don’t wanna get involved. I’ll call him later.”

“Fine, get back to me after. If he doesn’t answer, I’m taking the first flight.”

“Vampire?”

Yuqi, who was just about to turn around to leave, stops in her tracks.

“What… was that?” she asks, standing still before discreetly scenting the air. “Is that… blood?”

Jeongguk’s eyes widen. He’s used to smelling blood whenever you’re there to leave it, but not this much. Quickly, and without regard to Yuqi, he turns to rush back into his kitchen, eyes going even wider at the vision in front of him.

“Vampire?” you call out quietly again from the chair, eyes closed and unknowing of his return. You seem out of it, bordering on unconscious, and it’s not without reason. Jeongguk curses himself for not double checking the blood bag when he knows that brand is prone to ripping because the bag isn’t full; it’s broken, and your blood is dripping into a big puddle of red on the floor.

You think… you’re being… carried? By someone firm and… warm. You like that.

“I’m not warm," a low voice comments. "At least I’m not supposed to be.”

“I’m dying… right?” you mumble, feeling how the vampire puts you down on something soft.

“Probably, yeah.”

He does something to your arms, and you can’t figure out what, but you realize it has something to do with collecting the remaining blood when you’re gone.

There’s another voice.

Next time you open your eyes, you feel… different. And upset. You’re not as dizzy as you’ve become accustomed to, and the room doesn’t spin when you sit up on the bed. Your body hurts, but it feels more like you’re simply tired and beat than extremely weak. Most importantly, you feel, which means you’re not dead.

As if he could sense your awakening—or just possesses superhuman hearing—a door opens to reveal the vampire. He's wearing other clothes, grey sweatpants and a black t-shirt, and his face doesn't give you anything.

“What happened?” you question, looking around the room that’s clearly a bedroom. “And where am I?”

“You passed out. There was a hole in the bag, so the blood was just leaking onto the floor. I had my friend steal some from the hospital, and I gave you a transfusion. Yuqi also brought some clothes and stuff for you, so you’re staying here at least until tomorrow. Then you’re free to leave whenever you want.”

“I… don’t understand. Why would you—why not just let me go then?”

“I changed my mind.”

You look at him, bewildered and trying to find the words. “What do you mean you changed your mind? We had an agreement?”

“I know, but I changed my mind. I’m not doing it. If the blood matters to you, the bags are in the freezer.”

“Why–what would I do with blood?” you question in frustration. Is he offering it back in case you want to drink it? Try to put it back inside your veins? Apparently, you’ve already had transfusions, so you have exactly zero use for frozen bags of blood. “Why can’t you just get on with it? Why not let me die?”

“I do not. Want. To,” he hisses.

You stare at him in silence, feeling confused and betrayed. He looks away but doesn't seem affected. No shame, no regret, no anything but a moment of frustration to breach otherwise calm determination.

“Here’s the stuff,” he gestures toward a duffel bag by the foot of the bed. “You have a bathroom right outside, and I’m gonna order some food for you. You should take it easy; I wasn’t able to give you as much blood as you really need, and unfortunately, what I’ve previously collected isn’t fit to give back. Since it’s been frozen and stored improperly for that kind of purpose, there would be a risk of clotting.”

You look at him from where you’re sitting on his bed, and he looks back at you. The irritation you feel grows beyond what you’re capable of conveying, and so it turns into defeat. It makes you angry, how he managed to back out of giving you what you wanted at the very last second. You spent months upholding your end of the deal, and when it finally came time for him to do the same, he didn’t. 

“Don’t bother,” you lie down slowly, your back facing him where he stands at the door. Silently, you curse your body for feeling so tired; ideally, you’d stomp out of there, slamming the door behind you. “I’ll leave tomorrow morning.”

Your own clothes are still wearable. The few stains of blood are relatively small and dried, and the vampire already placed you on his bed, so you don’t feel like you’ll do any more damage by sleeping in them. The house is quiet, but you don’t think he’s left it, which begs the question of where he is. And also if he sleeps and if he does, then… where? He never gave you a tour or anything, so you have no idea what the rest of his house looks like. Whatever; you don’t care, anyway.

His sheets smell clean, though, and it doesn’t take you long to pass out, truly exhausted.

When you wake up, you can’t find your phone, and without any other time measuring device, you don’t know what time it is. It appears like the sun rose not too long ago so that narrows your guess a little bit at least.

Sitting up slowly, you take a deep breath. You feel… okay. A bit sore almost, but more energetic than you have in a while. Unfortunately, it’s not necessarily a good thing in your book.

Sighing, you put your feet to the hardwood floor. They carry you with only a little dizziness, and you set your sight on the bedroom door. It opens smoothly, and you peer out, looking for the bathroom the vampire mentioned. There’s a door immediately to your left which you guess must be it, and so you head toward it. 

After successfully finding the bathroom and using it, you decide to continue the search for your phone. Since you thought last night would be your last and therefore arrived by Uber rather than driving, it means that without your phone, you have no way home.

You make your way down some stairs, recognizing the hallway as the one the vampire has led you through what feels like countless times. Last time you remember having your phone was in the kitchen, so that’s where you steer your steps.

As luck would have it, the kitchen is also where the vampire happens to be. Upon your entrance, your eyes immediately fall on the tall man where he stands, leaning back against the counter. Although he surely heard you approaching a long time ago, he only turns his head slowly toward you when you’re well into the room. He’s hard to read; doesn’t offer much.

“Do you know where my phone is?”

The vampire twists his body to look at the counter behind him, sliding something toward you. You take a step closer, inspecting the device when it’s in your hands. Three percent.

“Do you have a charger I can borrow?”

“Yeah,” he answers with a nod and pushes off the counter, leaving the kitchen. You wait, quietly wondering what exactly goes on inside his head. He seems unfazed by the whole ordeal, which doesn’t necessarily surprise you. But what you still don’t quite understand is why he claimed to have changed his mind. Could it be that he just didn’t want to deal with your body? 

The vampire returns with a white charger in his hand, his skin cold against yours when you accept it from him. Finding a fitting outlet near the table, you plug the charger in and sit down, gazing out through the window while you wait for the phone to charge enough for the trip home. The vampire has gone back to leaning wordlessly against the counter, and you ignore him.

Opening your phone, you find that the only unread notification you have is a spam email. Why are you surprised? With a small sigh, you lock the device again, hoping it’ll charge faster if you don’t use it. Forty percent should be enough.

It’s snowing outside, and you watch the big snowflakes fall slowly and silently to the already white ground. Waiting like this gives you time to go over all the things you’ve done wrong in your life.

Next time you unlock your phone, the battery has reached thirty-seven percent. You open the Uber app to see that a car can arrive in ten minutes. You confirm it, noting the time as eleven twenty-three. You’ll wait five more minutes before you start getting ready, which honestly is just putting your shoes and coat on. 

The seconds pass slowly one after the other. You wonder briefly how long it took the vampire to clean because, although you didn’t notice the blood dripping to the floor while it was happening, you understood that there was a lot of it. Must suck for him to have it wasted like that. The question is also why he would waste even more blood by giving you a transfusion? If he went through the pain of acquiring bagged blood, why not just drink that?

At eleven twenty-nine, your phone’s battery is at fifty-two percent. You unplug the charger from the wall, and as you stand, you place it on the table with a quiet ‘thanks.’

“Going home?” the vampire wonders, black eyes watching you. He looks casual, but there’s that hint of softness shining through again. 

You pass him on your way to the front door. “Yeah.”

“Reconsider,” he encourages, and you know he’s not talking about your journey home. 

You roll your eyes. “No.”

“Yes,” he follows. “Whatever’s troubling you doesn’t matter. There’s so much for you to see and do, so many places to visit and people to meet. Your life is so incredibly short, and you won’t have time to see even a fraction of the world as is.”

“Thanks for the pep talk,” you say, bending down to put your boots on.

“Have you even been outside of this town?”

Why is he trying to control you? He doesn’t know you; he doesn’t care. It’s not like you’ll magically be fine after his ‘cheer up, pal,’ and ending your life is not a decision you have taken hastily or easily.

“No.”

“Don’t you want to see what’s out there?”

“Of course. But it’s not…” you straighten up to look at him, frustration dripping from your words. “Don’t you see that I’m all alone? I don’t have anybody, no one to experience things with, and much less the money to just up and leave. Sure, maybe I could get a loan and travel through Italy for two weeks, but then what? I’ll be miserable and in debt.”

The vampire tilts his head, looking at you with his black eyes but not saying anything. He just doesn't understand. You put your other foot into your boot and reach for your coat before he can try to persuade you again for whatever reason.

“Whatever,” you sigh, “I’ll be going.”

He doesn’t stop you from opening the door, and he doesn’t follow you when you leave, one boot undone and with your coat held to your chest. Irritation turns to sadness and defeat as you wait for the Uber to arrive, taking the opportunity to actually put your coat on and tie your laces properly. Snow falls around you, and when you're done, you stand there, waiting pathetically by the side of the road in the cold. You’re back at square one.

Despite having slept for countless hours at the vampire’s house, you head straight for your bed the moment you return home. For another few hours, you sleep, and then you spend a few more lying there in the dark, thinking. 

It’s seven p.m. on a Saturday. You’ve wasted a lot of time, months even, waiting for the vampire to get what he wanted and follow through on his part. But that’s over now, so what are you waiting for right now? 

Two and a half hours later, you put your boots back on and throw a lighter jacket over your shoulders, one that allows easier access to your neck.

Still not feeling your best, it takes you fifteen minutes to walk what the vampire did in six, carrying you on his back. You don’t understand him. He acted like he didn’t want you to die, but if he cared about you at all, he would’ve backed out earlier and not waited until his actions brought you within an inch of your life for what, the third time? Was he hoping you’d stay alive so that you’d hopefully continue donating your blood, even if less frequently? 

Although nearing his feeding grounds, you’re hoping not to run into him. He did state that he changed his feeding days to Thursdays, and last week, when you did run into him, it seemed like a coincidence. Besides, this place is your best bet tonight; even the vampire admitted that there were others there last time. Surely, they’re around here somewhere tonight as well. 

Since you assume vampires don’t want unnecessary attention, you stake out near the same club as last week, but this time, you hide in the shadows around a corner. Then, you wait for a victim.

Thirty minutes to midnight, a woman stumbles out through the door, a bouncer holding it open for her. She’s obviously had a bit to drink, and as she clumsily fixes her little cross body bag and sets off along the street, you look around from your hiding spot.

But you don’t see or hear anything; not a dark figure moving nor the sound of footsteps. Still, you follow her, hoping for the best. Wanting to keep your distance, you instead find it hard to keep up with her, which is saying something about your current health.

About two hundred meters from the club, she suddenly slows down, her attention seemingly drawn to something in an alleyway. You weren’t sure exactly how the vampires hunt, but by how the woman begins to slowly drift inside the dark alleyway of her own accord, you guess they do have some kind of pull. Most women, even when slightly drunk, typically try not to do… that.

You quicken your steps as much as possible without breaking into a sprint. Not only do you want to speak to a vampire; if you can take that woman’s place and leave her unscathed, it’s an added bonus. Before you’ve caught up, the woman slowly and quietly disappears, and when you turn the corner with your phone in hand and flashlight turned on, you spot a man holding her to his body. 

Evidently hearing you approaching, the man has placed them against the wall, halfway obscured by a dumpster and hoping you’d walk past them, which you would have if you weren’t so focused on the woman and your mission.

The man squints in the light, and you very clearly discern long fangs. You take another step into the alleyway, but what you didn’t expect was to be grabbed from another direction. 

Gasping, you feel strong arms hold your back against someone’s chest, effortlessly keeping you immobile. 

“What can we offer? Though you smell like vampire already?” The man who holds you says, sounding surprised, and your phone is taken from your hand and the flashlight turned off. 

Obviously, they assume you’re one of the freaky ones looking for vampires because any normal person would run. Your reason for wanting to find one is different, though. 

“I have a proposition,” you stutter, not too scared but uncomfortable with how the man noses at your neck. Despite knowing that if the vampire bites, it’ll most likely be your neck, you can’t help trying to pull away. It’s just another bodily reaction. 

Your words intrigue him, and he moves, creating just a tad bit more space between your bodies and looking down at you with a curious smirk.

“A proposition, you say?”

“You can have my blood—all of it—if you take it right here and now.”

“What’s the catch?” he asks, raising an eyebrow much like a certain vampire you know. “What’s in it for you?”

“There is no catch. I want to die.”

The other vampire, curiously listening to your conversation, whispers something in the other woman’s ear, and lets her go. She stumbles away from him and then casually leaves the alleyway, turning the corner calmly as if nothing happened. 

You meet the vampire’s puzzled yet curious eyes. “There’s nothing wrong with my blood if you think I’m trying to trick you into something. Except that it’s apparently B positive which I understand is not that desirable, but—”

“You’re Jeon’s human?”

“Uh—what? Who?” you ask, confused but slowly putting two and two together.

“Fuck, should we?” the other vampire questions quietly.

“Jeon,” the closest one to you starts, “is the vampire you smell of. He’s been very persistent no one touches his human.”

“Yeah. Can’t blame him. If I was lucky enough to have someone offer to be a walking blood bag, I wouldn’t let them outside at all.”

“I’m not… I’m not anyone’s, and I’m not a walking blood bag,” you explain, feeling belittled. “He made me a promise that he broke. He was going to help me die in exchange for my blood, but he just used me to collect blood, and then he didn’t deliver.”

The two vampires look at each other, and you feel like they didn’t really pay attention to anything you just said.

“I don’t know, man. I’m not sure I wanna get on his bad side.”

“But he’s too arrogant,” the first one complains. “If I want something, why should he prevent me from getting it? He doesn’t own the supply here. I’m a thousand years old; I shouldn’t need to ask for permission.”

“Dude’s like three thousand years old, though? You don’t need to ask permission; you can literally choose anyone. Except this one, for some reason. I don’t think I would if I were you.”

“Our agreement is over,” you try to enter the conversation the two vampires are holding over your head.

“Well,” the one holding your arms peers down at you, “He said that under no circumstances is anyone allowed to touch you.”

You scoff, growing irritated again, “Okay, well, are there any vampires around that aren’t such wimps? If I can’t find anyone to just snap my neck, I’m going to the train tracks and then my blood will be wasted.”

That’s a lie, of course. There’s a reason you picked death by vampire; you’re too scared to do it any other way, and no matter how much you want to die, you can’t subject anyone else—like a poor train driver—to it. Vampires are cold and heartless. They don’t care.

“Hold on. Wait,” the vampire holds you tighter when you haphazardly try to wiggle out of his grasp.

“Look,” he says to the other, “He can’t tell us what to do. Besides, if he gets angry, we can just say that she said their agreement was over, and we did her a favor out of the goodness of our hearts.”

“You don’t have a heart; you just want to annoy him.”

The vampire grins. At first, it’s a boyish smile directed at his friend, but when he slowly tilts his head down to look at you, it turns almost sinister. “I think I’m gonna do it.”

You gulp. No matter how much this is what you want, it does scare you. Mostly because you’re afraid it will be painful.

“Is there a way you can kill me first? I don’t want it to hurt.”

The smiling vampire shakes his head. 

“No.”

You thought death was supposed to be a void. A void of darkness, devoid of physical matter, emotions, and thoughts. But it hurts. It hurts so much. 

Then, a void does take over.

Jeongguk knew you’d try again. If he wouldn’t kill you, you were going to find someone who would. And despite hoping that you would’ve changed your mind, he was unfortunately right. He spent an hour roaming the dark streets around the town’s attempt at a nightlife, but he didn’t come across you. Not until he visits the same place where you first found him, a place he wouldn’t take as your first choice since you ran into him there a week earlier. 

He’s spent hours and hours these last weeks with you on his mind; the little human who wants to die so badly. It’s just something about you and your willingness to die that doesn’t sit right with him, and you won’t leave his thoughts. It’s not his business, he told himself as he saw you curled up and unconscious in your car. Who is he to tell someone what they should do with their life? If anything, respecting your wishes and consuming freely donated blood is easier and more ethical than taking it from plastered people who aren’t really sure what’s going on, right?

The scenes replaying the most in his head are more recent. It’s the way you suggested he kill and butcher your body, saying no one would look for you anyway, and how you called for him, unknowing that your blood was dripping to the floor but still trying your hardest to squeeze that ball for him. Your fingers were barely moving, but you tried since he wanted that blood. 

He’s not entirely sure what he’s doing, trying to convince you to live, but he guesses that he simply needs to know that you experienced some good things in life too. He can’t let you end it this way, as a lifeless body, discarded somewhere where no one will find you.

Anger, frustration, and an odd feeling of helplessness flood him as he takes in the sight of the vampire in the process of draining you dry. He rushes into the dark alleyway, the vampire looking up from your neck just as Jeongguk strikes. There’s not much of a fight after that. The first vampire stumbles backward, and Jeongguk grabs your lifeless body from him as the second vampire approaches, eyes wide and with his hands raised shoulder height.

“Easy, man.”

“I fucking told you to leave her alone.”

The dazed vampire grumbles something, but Jeongguk doesn’t pay him any attention. He places your body down on the snow-covered ground and looks at your pale face while searching for a pulse right under your jaw. 

“She wanted to die.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Jeongguk growls. “How much did you take?”

There is no pulse.

“At least three fourths. Possibly more.”

Jeongguk shuts his eyes. There’s no coming back from that.

You’ve lost and regained consciousness due to blood loss one too many times by now, but this time, it really feels different. Opening your eyes, the sunlight filling the room irritates your eyes, forcing you to squint for a few seconds. 

Without moving, you focus on something. The vampire. Jeon, was it? You watch as he rummages through his closet, practically soundlessly, taking out a few items and looking them over before settling on what looks like two black shirts, one long-sleeve and one short-sleeve. Then he digs out a pair of shorts and another pair of sweatpants. 

You’re not used to seeing him in direct sunlight, but now, the rays filtering through the half-opened blinds paint him in a new light, and you let your eyes linger on his arms as he folds the clothes. The green t-shirt he wears is doing a great job at highlighting his veiny, muscular forearms as they work. Light and shadows play along those very defined muscles, accentuating them further.

Your first impression of him was a cold one, one that slowly warmed a little over time both physically and mentally. But in this light? Without even touching him, he looks… warmer to you. Inviting, almost like when he wore that black hoodie. 

You sigh quietly and pull the blanket that’s thrown over you closer. The vampire hears and turns around, placing the clothes at the foot of his large bed.

“Hey. How are you feeling?”

You take a moment to consider his question. Though you’ve certainly felt better in a lot of ways, you don’t feel the way you’ve come to associate with severe blood loss. 

“Cold. And tired, but in a weird way.”

Weird is probably the best way to describe how you’re feeling in general. You feel light, but not weak. Tired, but not sleepy. 

He nods understandingly, “It’ll pass.”

You catch his gaze, holding it for a quiet moment. “You changed me, didn’t you?”

It’s the only explanation you can come up with. That vampire was hungry, and you remember slowly losing control in his grasp, both over your body and consciousness. With how many near-death experiences your body has endured in the last weeks—all blood loss related—there just wasn’t any chance you’d survive another draining.

“Yeah.” He looks away, sitting down on the edge of the bed. “I couldn’t…”

You think you understand well enough what he’s trying to say, although you’re not too sure of his reasons or how to feel about it. He couldn’t let you die. In a way, you’re disappointed because you were finally getting what you wanted, and dying has proved itself to be surprisingly difficult for you. 

But you’re not angry; not like you were after the vampire saved you the first time. He mentioned once that not even vampires are immortal, so at least you know that you’re not doomed to an eternal life in suffering; you can always try again if you want. However, you’d be back at square one when it comes to options, but you don’t really feel the urgency anymore. At least not at the moment.

He turns his head toward you, meeting your eyes with his deep, dark ones. “Let me show the world to you.”

Surprised to say the least, you mumble a quiet “What?”

He angles his body further toward you, and you see that despite the softer look on his face, he’s certain. “I want to show you everything the world has to offer. All the good things; the magical places and people.”

Not sure what to say, you just stare at him.

“Vampires are not immortal,” he continues. “If you really don’t want this, I’ll help you die. I promised. But please, think about it. No catch, no expectations.”

“But why… Why would you want that?” 

You’ve been alone for so long, unable to keep people around and interested, so why would this being be?

“Because I found that I really didn’t enjoy draining you of your life, especially when you were already so low to begin with. I want you to get the chance to experience the good things life has to offer, and I can’t help but want to be around when you do.”

“You don’t know me though.”

“I kinda want to,” he says, standing up with the cheekiest smile you’ve ever seen on him. “Think about it, okay? I’m not expecting anything from you other than that you consider.”

Still very much processing his words, you feel a cold shiver wreck your body, something the vampire notices.

“I’ll get you another blanket. Your body is still in the process of changing, and with that comes a decrease in temperature. It’s normal to feel cold.”

He’s about to leave when you call for him.

“Wait. What… What's your name? Your given name?”

He stops, and he smiles again. “Jeongguk. And I know yours already; it was on your door.”

You sleep for a little while longer, but when you start to feel better, you also start to think. You’ve been so certain for so long, and you still are—you think—but… either way, you’d like some answers; a clearer view of the whole picture.

“Jeongguk?” you call, unsure how loud you need to be. It feels strange to use a name for the vampire.

It doesn’t take long before the door opens. “Yeah?”

“I have some… questions.”

He nods, stepping into the darkness that is his bedroom and closing the door behind him. 

“Light sensitive?” he nods toward the window, where you’ve pulled the curtains closed over the blinds.

“Yeah… Is that normal?”

“It is. So is feeling sensitive to sound, touch, smell; basically all the senses. But it will pass pretty quickly.”

“Okay. Well, can you… tell me everything about being a vampire? I didn’t think you slept, but you do? Or why do I still sleep?”

He rounds the bed to sit next to you, and you feel it sink as he gets comfortable. Slowly, you turn to face him, watching him lean back against the headboard.

“So, basically, we can do all the things humans do. For instance, you’re still programmed to breathe, but it’s more of a habit and a way to smell than a means of survival.”

While he speaks, you try it. It’s strange, holding your breath and not feeling that strong, strong urge to take in air after a while.

“You can eat human food, but it’s not what sustains you, so most vampires don’t. It gets kinda boring after a while; you’ll see what I mean. Most also don’t sleep as they consider it a waste of time, but you can if you want to. I do pretty regularly. I find it… peaceful, and when you get older, it can be nice, getting a break between days.”

Hearing him talk so casually and almost… softly has you smiling slightly, unable to help it. So he had been sleeping when you knocked on the door, and his hair was all messy, and he looked so cuddly? You don’t know why, but you like that thought.

“You can exist in sunlight, you can consume garlic. Mirrors work for us as well. We don’t age like humans, but we can die if we’re pierced through the heart by something wooden—”

“—You mean staked?”

He looks at your wide, amused eyes and rolls his. “Yeah. Staked. Anyway, you’ll notice that your senses are heightened, and you’ll become stronger too. Not stronger than me, though,” he grins. “As for the blood, you can survive on any.”

“Any?”

What does he mean by that? Human and animal?

“Human, animal, vampire,” he says, the last one surprising you.

You blink, taken aback. “Vampires drink from other vampires?”

“We can. It’s not as common as feeding on humans as it’s mostly… a pretty intimate thing to do.”

“Oh, okay.” 

Thinking about it, you guess you can see why. Having someone so close, feeding on you without the power imbalance of prey versus predator that feeding on humans entails, must feel… intimate. More of a give and take. 

“You’ll need to feed in about a day or two, so you can choose. I have more human blood than just yours as it might be weird to drink your own blood, and I can get animal blood if that feels easier. Or… if you want to, you can drink from me.”

You look at him questioningly. “Didn’t you just say that it’s an intimate thing?”

He shrugs. “Yeah, but if it would make for an easier transition for you, I don’t mind. I’ve taken a lot of blood from you, after all.”

“Okay,” you nod, briefly biting your lip. “I’ll think about it. About all of… this.”

Is death the thing you wanted above all else, or was it to get out of the life you were living? Now that your old life is, in a way, over, you’re not sure. Regardless, there are other worries still plaguing you. You look—almost stare—at his pretty face. 

“What?”

You bite your lip nervously again. “What if you change your mind? I’m assuming this was quite a rushed decision on your part. What if I don’t live up to your expectations? I barely knew how to navigate this world as a human, there’s no way I could… manage on my own as… as a vampire.”

Say you decide to give it a shot; what do you do if he grows tired of you?

“Changing someone is not something we take lightly. We don’t…” he looks around, seemingly searching for the right words. “We don’t change anyone if we’re not prepared to guide them, at least through the first years. Usually, vampires only end up turning their romantic partners, so for most, it means staying together for life. Regardless, it’s a big decision.”

Noticing your wide eyes, Jeongguk smiles and chuckles. “I’m not saying you have to hang around me for the rest of your life, and I won’t ask you to play my wife or anything, but I won’t abandon you.”

It’s surprising enough to hear that vampires not only regularly fall in love with humans but take changing someone so seriously. But you’re even more surprised to hear him use the word ‘wife.’

“Your wife?” you ask, truly bewildered that word was even in his thoughts. “You said vampirism doesn't make you much prettier?”

He looks at you like you’ve grown another head. “It doesn’t. But you didn’t need to become prettier anyway.”

“Oh, come on.”

“I’m telling the truth? Don’t you remember what I told you when I carried you home that night?”

‘You’re a pretty girl, you know?’

Of course you remember, but it doesn’t mean it was true.

You roll your eyes. “You were feeling bad for me.”

“Hm,” Jeongguk looks away, thinking. “Okay, do you remember the very first thing I said to you?”

“That you weren’t going to turn me?”

“For sex, yeah. But I said I’d still fuck you.”

The smile he gives you reminds you more of the vampire that took your blood once every fortnight than the one who saved you. You don’t know what to say, and he seems to realize that, his smile turning softer.

“Like I said, I would’ve fucked you because you were pretty even as a human. Also, about luring said humans in? You will not have a problem with that if that’s something you’re interested in. I kinda want to see you do that, actually,” he grins, sending a shiver down your spine. “Hot.”

Jeongguk is sitting spread out on the rented apartment’s low couch, reading the back of a bottle of red wine when you pass him. It’s hot—a lot warmer than what you’re used to from your little hometown—and you sigh as you open the door to the balconet wider and fresh air starts to play with your dress. The weather doesn’t affect you like it used to, but some aspects are still more enjoyable than others. 

“I think I like Rome,” you place your hands on the railing, looking down at the scene two stories below you. It’s just after ten p.m., and people are dining outside the restaurant below you, their happy chatter accompanied by the romantic sound of street musicians. The air is humid, and besides the moonlight, the street is mainly illuminated by lights from the restaurant and surrounding shops.

You hear Jeongguk put the bottle down on the glass coffee table and stand up, something your human ears wouldn’t have picked up.

“We can stay longer if you want,” he offers quietly from right behind you.

Turning around, you let your gaze travel over his white dress shirt, held together by two single buttons—the rest lazily unbuttoned—and exposing most of his drool-worthy chest. He smirks, looking down at you, and you’re hit by how he hasn’t changed that much since you first met him in that alley. You’ve just gotten to see more sides of him.

You hold your breath, carefully reaching your hand out to pinch the fabric of his shirt between your thumb and index finger, pulling a little on it and nodding.

“Then we’ll stay,” he smiles, slowly stepping back and taking your hand softly in his. His skin feels warm against yours, and it’s almost like some sort of electric current courses through you. You grin as he pulls you toward him, moving to the slow and sensual music drifting up from outside.

Jeongguk lifts your hand above your head and twirls you. It makes you smile even wider, and you decide to place your arms loosely around his neck. He doesn’t object, just looks down at you, still smiling. 

One thing you'll never get used to is how handsome he is. Soft, black hair parted across his forehead, dark eyebrows and eyes, and a dimple that pops out when he smiles. One day, you’ll kiss his nose, you promise yourself. He looks so carefree, peering down at you like nothing else really matters; a mindset not too difficult to follow with him.

“How come everything is so… easy?”

He tilts his head, trying to make sense of your words as he places his hands on your waist. “Well… do you feel cared for?”

You think about it. All the new people—vampires—you’ve met so far are very funny and kind. They see you, and they listen to you. Especially Jeongguk’s friends, and even more so, Jeongguk. He’s easy to be around, and he’s been incredibly sweet to you, understanding that you’re going through a big change and that your previous life wasn’t all that great.

So you nod.

“Do you have anything that worries you?” He continues. “A looming anxiety regarding something?”

“No.” Turns out that Jeongguk and all his friends are filthy rich and also very generous, which means that you have no rent to pay, no stuff to buy, or bills to pay. Nor do you have people to impress or time-sensitive achievements to stress over.

Jeongguk’s smile turns extra cheeky. “Do you perhaps… also care a little bit for someone?”

You’d blush if that was something you could do. “You’d like to know, wouldn’t you?”

He chuckles before he turns a little more serious. “Jokes aside, there could be many reasons. Like I said, not feeling lonely or overly anxious surely helps a lot, but also stuff like… the change of scenery and seasons. But also…”

“Also…?”

He looks at you with a searching gaze, as if he’s trying to figure something out. “Tell me, did you ever see someone about how you felt?”

You shake your head.

“So you never got a diagnosis or medication?”

“No.”

“Then, maybe… you weren’t ‘only’ sad, and vampirism corrected some chemical imbalance in your brain. It could also explain why things are easier.”

Maybe. You thought that your mother dying was the catalyst for your sadness, and without seeing the point of the world, you got “weirder,” and the few people in your life withdrew. Then it was just you, and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t connect with people anymore. But maybe, like he said, it wasn’t ‘only’ feelings. A small part of you wishes you would’ve tried to get help, but a bigger part—although sad for the years you spent suffering—thinks this ending might be better.

He continues to sway your bodies, and you rest your head against his chest. When you left with him three months ago, one month after he changed you, you weren’t entirely certain where things would lead, because despite definitely feeling attracted to him, you didn’t really know him. But as the days pass, you don’t regret it, and you’re pretty sure you’re more than halfway to head over heels. You can’t deny that he gives you butterflies.

Sighing, you catch the scent of his naked skin against your cheek, reminded of something.

“You smell good. I remember thinking that you didn’t smell like anything?”

He laughs as you move your face slowly over his chest and up to his neck, smelling him.

“Do I?”

“Yeah,” you say, breathing him in and closing your eyes. There’s the same notes of laundry detergent, soap, and cologne, but also something unique to him. He doesn’t smell like a human, but… almost. It draws you in, that’s for certain.

“Are you hungry?” he wonders quietly. 

“Not sure,” you answer honestly. It’s turned out to be harder to tell than you imagined.

“Well, if you want it… go for it.”

“Like this?” you ask, pushing on his chest with a smile. He lets you walk him slowly back toward the couch, and when the back of his knees hit the edge, he sinks down onto it. 

“Mhm,” he hums happily.

High on the vampire equivalent of adrenaline, you straddle his lap, only to be caught off guard by his scent again. “No, but really, you smell so good.”

He chuckles. “Vampires who are more… compatible tend to smell good to each other.”

His revelation has you sitting back, curious but almost a little worried. Despite the details of your relationship being... a bit unclear—mostly due to his unwillingness to pressure you, you think—you can't help but want him to like you. “Does that mean that I smell good to you as well then? I mean, I remember that you didn’t like my blood?”

“You smell incredible to me. Almost addictive,” he reveals quietly, softly, resting his hands on your thighs, and you think your human heart would’ve raced. “And about your blood… I lied.”

Though grinning happily, there’s at least a trace of regret in his eyes.

“You lied? About not liking my blood?”

“Yeah. B is actually one of the more highly regarded blood types. I’m also B, but negative.”

You shake your head at him before carefully leaning in. With a soft touch of your lips, you locate the pulsating artery in his neck, gently angling his head away with your hands. Then, as you’ve done regularly for the last months, you pierce his skin with your fangs.

“I’m kinda surprised you still believed I didn’t like your blood,” he continues, though it sounds a little strained, like he’s trying to keep still. “If I didn’t like your blood, I wouldn’t have needed to change my feeding days to the day before you came. Nor would I have tried to attack you.”

You listen to his words, but you’ll have to process them better later because his blood is pretty much the only thing on your mind. His blood and his body. It took you a few times to get over the mental association with blood and drinking it, but now, it’s not something bad. It tastes and feels good, energizing you in a way food just doesn’t anymore. And it’s a chance to bond, making you feel closer to him. 

He likes it too, if his body language is anything to go by. You know he tries to stay still to give you the best chance to get what you need without distractions, but the little… almost purring sound that reverberates from somewhere deep in his chest is hard to miss. As is the way his hips shift almost unnoticeably, but you haven’t spoken about that.

Being smaller and recently changed, you don’t require nearly as much blood as he does, and as soon as you feel the urge filled, you run your tongue over the wound to close it, just like he’s taught you to.

“Good?” he asks when you pull back, and you nod, licking your lips. 

You keep your eyes on his skin, knowing that it only takes a second for the wound to heal but up to two weeks for the scar from another vampire's teeth to fade to nothing. 

“All of the vampires we’ve met, they’ve looked so… amused when they understand I drink from you. Why is that? I get that it’s ‘intimate’ but they were pretty much all couples, weren’t they? Not that we’re… you know…”

You haven’t spoken about that, either, really.

It confused you, more so since you last week stumbled across a local couple smiling very cheekily when they saw the scar on Jeongguk’s neck that he’d made absolutely no effort to conceal.

He laughs. “It’s because only I have marks.”

You look puzzled. Yeah, sure, but you don’t understand why that would be amusing.

He looks at your confused face and continues. “The fact that you drink from me but not I from you usually means that I’ve submitted to you. That I belong to you. Which is not very common when I’m so much older than you. It’s usually the other way around if anything.”

“Oh,” you exclaim quietly, lifting your hand to your neck. “Should I…? Do you… want to feed from me? Cause I’m not sure that I…”

You don’t like the idea of losing blood. You know that Jeongguk has said that as a vampire, you quite literally can’t run out, but you don’t like it. Thinking about someone biting your neck has images from the night you died flashing before your eyes. You don’t remember much,  but you remember being scared and how much it hurt. Surely, it would be different to let him bite you, but… you don’t know. You can’t help but feel like maybe you should? Don’t you kind of owe it to him?

“I want to, of course I do, but not that badly. I get that it’s an uncomfortable concept for you, so that’s why I haven’t brought it up. If you ever feel comfortable enough, we can try, because it’s very hot, but otherwise, it doesn’t matter.”

You lower your hand, smiling carefully down at him. He runs his hands over your thighs softly.

“So, you’re really just… ancient?”

“Excuse me?” 

“Yeah? You’re literally older than Jesus?”

He rolls his eyes, still smiling.

“Jokes aside, doesn’t it get boring? You were kinda grumpy when I first met you.”

“Truth be told, it does. I’ve seen everything, mostly even many times over. But getting to see everything with you is like getting to experience it for the first time all over again.”

“That’s kinda… cheesy,” you chuckle, but you can’t deny that it makes you feel warm inside. “Yuqi said you probably needed a change of scenery as well.”

“So what if it’s cheesy? It’s true," he grins, and it's your turn to roll your eyes. "And, yeah, she might’ve been right. I guess vampires get lonely too sometimes.”

Although he's still smiling, you can't help but hurt a little, thinking about him feeling lonely too.

“So then, what’s next?" you ask. "When do we leave for Portugal?”

“Depends on when you want to. I’ll just tell Taehyung we’ll meet them later. As for now, you know Fontana di Trevi?”

“Yeah?”

“Wanna take a dip?”

“What? Isn’t it pretty shallow? And probably… illegal?”

“What are they gonna do? Stop us?” He smiles a wide, happy smile, his white fangs almost glimmering in the romantically dimmed light.

<previous | next> author's note: i hope you liked it!! please reblog if you did <3<3<3

[ratatatastic]

spouse duties include shared labour of media questions with a mere glance

post practise interview | 6.23.24 (x)

[userchai]

Hey Batty, can we get Steve teaching Eddie how to eat reader out? maybe he makes Eddie lay down right next to him so he can see the way Steve runs his tongue against reader!

((also, loving all the content you’ve been uploading lately, you’re my favorite writer!))

Pass The Eggnog

Steddie x Fem!Reader Smut

wordcount: 2.2K

thank you so much for this request nonny, I had so much fun writing this! feedback is always welcome! 18+ only!

warnings- cunnilingus, mlm, threesome, drunkenness, spit, cum, degradation, mfm, Steve x Eddie. Dom steve. Steve slaps Eddie once. please come to me with anything I may have missed!!

You weren’t one for eggnog, but how could you pass it up when Eddie was standing next to you, a devilish grin overtaking his handsome face, as he held a Christmas mug with cute gingerbread men towards you. “Cmon sugar, this is good eggnog.” He said, laughing as you wrinkled your nose at him and rolled your eyes. “I know why it’s ’good’ Eddie you’ve spiked it.” You say, leaning back onto Steve as he wraps his toned arms around your middle, pulling you close. “Exactly, what’s a Christmas party without spiked eggnog anyway? So Sorry Stevie, but your parties aren’t quite what they once were.” Steve huffs behind you, his ego taking a hit as he acts nonchalant at the comment. “Whatever Munson, give me another one of those, if I’m going to make it through the night with you I need to be drunk.” Eddie smiles and grabs another glass of his ‘specialty’ as he liked to call it, walking over to Steve and bowing down to him while holding the glass high above his head. “Oh King Steve, please accept this lowly peasants’ offering.” Steve snatched it out of his hands, downing it quickly as Eddie laughed wildly, standing back up to lean back against the kitchen counter.

Most of the people that had bothered to show up to the party had left hours ago, leaving you with Steve and Eddie. Steve had dropped Dustin off at his house before coming back home, the three of you standing in the kitchen drinking more and more as the hours passed. Your mind felt fuzzy as you listened to another argument that Eddie and Steve were engaged in, you didn’t know what it was about, having zoned out at the start of it. You only snapped back to reality when Steve nudged you, looking at you expectantly with his honey brown eyes. “What?” You say, glancing between the both of them, noticing a blush breaking out across Eddie’s cheeks.

“Seems like Eds has a crush on you baby.” Steve whispers against your ear, leaning his chin down until it touches your shoulder, you glance back at Eddie, your brain swimming with thoughts that you couldn’t quite decipher because of the alcohol coursing its way through your body. “Y-you do?” You say timidly, as Eddie nods shyly, twirling a piece of his curls between his pointer finger and thumb before chewing on the end nervously. You stand in the middle of the Harrington’s kitchen confused, and slightly in shock, how had they even gotten on the subject of Eddie liking you? More importantly, how was Steve not blowing a fuse right now at the idea of his best friend liking you? You turn around and look at Steve, moving some of his hair away from his eyes from where it had fallen down from its gelled up perfection. “What do you think about that baby?” You ask, nervously chewing your lip as you feel chills run through your body, you could feel Eddie staring at you from where he stood behind you. Your breath was caught in your throat as a dark look passed over Steve’s features.

You slowly back up as Steve advances towards you and Eddie, he walks you back until you’re pressed up against the kitchen counter. Your bodies smashed up against each other as he leans down close to your face, your noses bumping against each other. You hold your breath In anticipation of what he could possibly say about this whole situation, your question was quickly answered as Steve grabbed Eddie’s hand, bringing it towards you, placing it behind you against the swell of your ass. Your eyes widen as you look up at him. “I think this is all I’ve wanted for a long time, baby. We’ve talked about this before… Eddie and I.” Steve whispers looking over at the older man, who couldn’t stop shuffling around from his nerves, his hand trembling against your body as Steve gripped it, not allowing him to move.

You hold completely still as Steve leans down towards your ear again, smirking as he glances at Eddie, “The two of you have about ten seconds to get in my room, and strip your clothes off or you’ll suffer the consequences. Do you want this princess?” He asks, even in situations where he was full of nothing but pure lust he always made sure you were comfortable with what was going on. You nod, squeezing your legs together as Eddie moves his hand down lower, squeezing your flesh, his rings pressing harshly against you. “Y-yes Sir, I want this, want you and Eddie.” You whimper out.

———————————————————————

You couldn’t fully grasp what was going on, other than hands touching you absolutely everywhere, Eddie’s rings leaving marks on your skin from how hard he was gripping onto you. Your bodies pressed against each other as you made out slowly, the way he kissed was different from Steve, but in the best ways. His lips were soft, the stubble around his top lip was scratching against you, tickling you and causing a delicious friction you couldn’t get enough of. Steve was standing at the foot of his bed, watching you and Eddie helplessly grinding against each other, his own hard on was straining against his sweats, creating a wet patch in the fabric, making it stick to his body uncomfortably. He would think of himself in a minute, for now he was enjoying the show. Sweet little virgin Eddie, pussy drunk already, and all you were doing was kissing him.

“Look at the both of you, pathetic little sluts aren’t you?” Steve all but growls out as he makes his way onto the bed next to you, reaching down to make you stop kissing Eddie. You whine at the loss of his lips against yours, but before you can protest even further Steve’s telling you to open your mouth. You throb at his words, knowing what was coming as you tilt your chin up to him, sticking your tongue out as far as you can. He spits directly onto it before two of his fingers are fucking into the back of your throat. “See that Eds? She’s a good little pet, does anything I ask of her. If you’re my good boy I’ll let you have her however you want.” Steve says, holding back a laugh at Eddie’s lust blown eyes, his lips raw from kissing, curls wild and tangled from where your hands were gripping them. He nods dumbly and watches as you drool and gag around Steve’s long fingers. Steve chuckles as he slaps Eddie’s face with the hand that isn’t in your mouth, gripping it between his fingers and making Eddie meet his gaze. “Wanna learn how to eat her pretty pussy? I know you do, it’s so good baby, let me show you.” He says, grabbing you and pushing you off of Eddie, pinning your body down as he works your skirt down your legs quickly. Eddie sits up quickly, his chest heaving from how hard he was breathing. He watches as you and Steve strip his clothes off, yours having been partially taken off before Steve came into the bedroom. You turn to meet his gaze, his brown eyes now black, you smile at him and bite your lip as Steve spreads your legs, motioning for Eddie to come closer. The cold air against your pussy heightens your senses, you were soaked, it was all over the inside of your thighs, running down onto the bed underneath you, ruining the sheets. You sit up on your elbows and watch as Eddie and Steve lay on their stomach’s in front of you.

“I’ll go first, so you can see exactly how she likes it, and then I’m gonna hold your head against her until you’re absolutely soaked in her cum. Is that what you want, pretty boy?” Steve asks, Eddie nodding pathetically next to him, holding onto one of your legs gently and turning his eyes upon you, “You’re so pretty.” He whispers out, your heart beating harder at his sweet words, you couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol making him feel this way towards you, but you didn’t care right now, you just wanted both of them to ruin you. You hold your breath as Steve blows warm air against the inside of your thighs, his lips grazing against you close enough to where you need him but not letting you get what you really want. You tremble as he gently runs his fingers through your slit, running them up to the top of your pussy, spreading the lips apart before he’s moaning, smiling up at you. “There’s that pretty little clit, look how hard it is, is that all because of Eddie baby?” You moan out, clenching around nothing as you nod, your mind already floating through space as you feel him spit right against your clit before he’s wrapping his soft lips around you, sucking like it’s the last thing he would ever do.

Your loud moans echo around the room, followed by Steve pulling back to whisper praises every few seconds, edging you as he licks from your hole up to your clit over and over again. Eddie’s eyes are locked onto Steve’s mouth against you, his cock aching he was sure he could cum just from watching this. He’s rutting against the bed softly, trying to relieve some of the pressure. Steve pulls back, a string of his spit connecting from his lips to your pussy, Eddie leaning over and sucking it off of his bottom lip, moaning as Steve kisses him. Their tongues dance against each other as you watch. “Fuck, Eddie, Steve, oh my god.” You breathe out, feeling close to tears at the loss of Steve’s mouth against you. “I think she needs you now, cmon.” Steve mumbles against Eddie, scooting over and pushing Eddie’s face towards you, smiling as Eddie whines at the harsh grip Steve has on his hair. Eddie’s tongue lolls out of his mouth, as you push your hips down toward him and attempt to feel anything, he wraps his inked arms around your legs, pulling you down and timidly licking a fat stripe up to your clit. You were so worked up at this point it hurt and all you could think about was cumming on Eddie’s face.

———————————————————————-

Eddie lapped against your pussy like a starved man. His long tongue pushing inside of you reaching places Steve hadn’t been able to get to with his own tongue. “Fuck me Eddie please!” You cry out, your legs shaking as he pushes them farther apart, exposing you to him, allowing him access to devour you however he pleased. “Steve m-must be a good teacher.” You whisper out laughing slightly, Steve smiles against your neck from his position next to you, kissing you gently on your soft spot. “Maybe baby, but I think Eddie was just that hungry for you, he’s never even fucked a pussy before and he already has you about to cum.” He said, laughing darkly. Eddie groans from his position as you and Steve talk about him like he’s not even there. You let out a particularly loud moan when Steve attaches his mouth to one of your nipples, your back arching up, “Can’t anymore, gonna cum, gonna cum, fuck I’m cumming.” You gasp out, Eddie pulls away in shock as your orgasm overtakes you, you’re on another planet as you soak his mouth, he sticks his tongue out trying to catch every last drop as he moans obscenely.

Your whole body trembles as you reach for the both of them, silently asking for them to kiss you, Eddie crawls up next to you and takes turns kissing you, smiling as he watches you kiss Steve softly. “That was the hottest thing I’ve ever done.” He says, leaning over to kiss Steve when he pulls away from you. Steve smiles right back at him as they pull away from each other. “Who said we’re done, Big Boy?” He says, taunting Eddie with the nickname that he gave to Steve. A smile creeps its way onto your face as you lean back against the headboard, “Go on then boys, put on a show for me.” You say, Steve raises his eyebrows at your boldness shaking his head a little before he’s kissing your cheek gently, whispering how much he loves you into your ear. You gently rub his arm before pushing him towards Eddie, you knew they had wanted each other for a long time, and getting to watch this play out had to be the hottest thing you’d ever seen. Steve goes to grab Eddie, but before he can Eddie is leaning up towards you, kissing you softly before whispering a thank you, allowing Steve to pull him away, their bodies tangling together as they kiss. The roles have suddenly reversed and now it’s you telling them how they’re your good boys, telling them how slutty they are and laughing at the whines that escape their mouths. Their hands exploring places they never thought they would be able to as they float away in a peaceful bliss of each other. Smiling over at you every now and then and blowing you kisses.

Eddie was wrong, you thought. Steve still knew how to throw a hell of a party, he just needed a little spiked eggnog.

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@slutty-thevampireslayer @justsheerfilth1 @girlfuckthatwhore @lithium80sblog

[feelmyskinonyourskin]

Thinking about Frank Castle x Avengers!Reader

You met him through Bucky because Sam would obviously try and find Bucky a veteran's support group like the one he ran in CATWS but in Brooklyn - which led him to Curtis' group (I've put this HC in previous writing and I stand by it)

You're roommates with Sam and Bucky and occasionally they host poker night with some of the guys and one night you come home from an evening stroll to a kitchen table of vets and beer and cards.

You smile shyly and say hi to the group and Frank is instantly smitten.

But it takes weeks of casual small talk and asking Bucky about you for him to finally pluck up the courage to ask you out.

Once you make things official, he doesn't want anyone coming after you in retaliation against him plus he's so scared to lose yet another person he cares about. So he asks to keep your relationship secret even from the rest of the Avengers, which makes you roll your eyes because you have super powers you'd be fine to defend yourself against any of Frank's enemies.

Frank also worries you might be a little ashamed of him publicly. He thinks it might be harder on you if the world knew you were dating a criminal vigilante. Avengers get lots of press and attention and he'd hate to bring his drama into it and hurt your image and potentially all the good you do in the world even if you don't give a shit about the publicity side of it.

Which means a lot of sneaking around - dates in darkly lit restaurants and such.

Date nights frequently get postponed because you getting called on last minute missions or Frank takes longer hunting down a gang than he was anticipating.

Even if you go weeks without seeing each other because of your busy work lives, the love is always still there and you both do a great job of making up for lost time.

When you give him recaps of your recent missions, he always scoffs and gets worried about your safety and asks you not to go into such dangerous situations but obviously you have to it's your job.

So you at some point have to make a rule that he gets no interference in your work stuff. He can make any request in your civilian life to keep you safe (ie. you can't go out at night without him, etc.) but is not allowed to make any requests about your job.

Until inevitably your work crosses paths with his work because the street level gangs and mob bosses he takes down tend to have ties to bigger things like Hydra and such.

One night you're at a warehouse upstate following a lead on a Hydra weapons facility and bump into Frank who was tracking down a human trafficking ring that was also linked to the same address.

Since he knows you, Bucky and Sam, he agrees to help the Avengers just this one time.

You could never convince him to join up and "go legit" no matter how hard you tried. He liked working alone and with noone giving him orders.

As you raid the warehouse and take down the enemy, he's aghast at seeing you put yourself in harms way so flippantly but you have powers and Shield training, so of course you're fine.

He's never actually seen you in action before and he eventually gets over the fear and is super turned on at seeing you be so bad ass and kick booty.

Yeah, the passionate "I missed you. That was so badass. I was so scared. God I hope we don't get caught." sex you have behind the warehouse as the mission is wrapping up is steamy and animalistic.

Bucky has super soldier hearing so he hears it and figures it out first.

Except Yelena has actually known for months because she's a spy, duh.

Sam is the last to figure it out but isn't surprised, you two are so compatible it seems obvious that you should be together.

[inkspiredwriting]

Love, Hate, and Everything in Between

Five Hargreeves x Fem!reader

Warnings: none

Y/N and Five had the kind of relationship that was equal parts fiery arguments and undeniable chemistry. They bickered over everything, from the best way to handle temporal anomalies to whose turn it was to make coffee. But beneath the constant banter, there was a deep connection that neither of them could ignore.

One particularly intense day, after a mission that had gone sideways due to Five's impulsiveness and Y/N's stubbornness, they found themselves alone in the Umbrella Academy mansion. The argument that ensued was explosive, with both of them yelling and gesturing wildly.

"Why can't you ever just listen to me?" Y/N shouted, her face flushed with frustration.

"Because your plans are always overly complicated!" Five shot back, his eyes blazing.

They stood there, breathing heavily, the tension between them palpable. Then, without thinking, Five stepped forward and kissed her. It was as if all the anger and frustration melted away in that moment, replaced by an intense, undeniable passion.

What followed was an incredible night filled with laughter, whispered confessions, and the kind of intimacy that transcended their usual love-hate dynamic. For once, they let their guards down completely, and it was magical.

The next morning, however, brought a new challenge. Klaus, ever the nosy sibling, had noticed the change in the atmosphere. As Y/N and Five tried to navigate their way through breakfast without making eye contact, Klaus sauntered into the kitchen, a knowing smirk on his face.

"Well, well, well," Klaus drawled, leaning against the counter. "What do we have here? Did our favorite bickering duo finally decide to make up?"

Five rolled his eyes, desperately trying to keep a straight face. "Klaus, mind your own business."

Y/N, blushing furiously, tried to focus on her coffee. "Yeah, Klaus. Can't you find someone else to bother?"

Klaus chuckled, clearly enjoying their discomfort. "Oh, but this is so much more fun. You two were like a ticking time bomb, and I, for one, am thrilled to see it finally go off."

Throughout the day, Klaus continued to drop hints and make suggestive comments, much to the annoyance of Five and Y/N. During a meeting, he winked at them, causing Luther and Diego to exchange puzzled glances.

"What's with you today, Klaus?" Diego asked, narrowing his eyes.

Klaus grinned. "Oh, nothing. Just appreciating the beauty of love in unexpected places."

Five groaned, rubbing his temples. "Can we please focus on the task at hand?"

Y/N shot Klaus a warning look, but he just winked at her. "Oh, come on, Y/N. Lighten up. It's all in good fun."

As the day wore on, Five and Y/N found themselves constantly bumping into each other, their usual bickering now tinged with a new, playful energy. Despite Klaus's relentless teasing, they couldn't help but steal glances and share secret smiles.

Later that evening, after everyone had retired to their rooms, Five found Y/N on the rooftop, staring out at the city. He approached quietly, slipping his hand into hers.

"Sorry about Klaus," he said softly. "He's impossible."

Y/N laughed, leaning her head against his shoulder. "It's okay. He's actually kind of right. We were a ticking time bomb."

Five smiled, pressing a kiss to her temple. "Yeah, but maybe that's not such a bad thing."

As they stood there together, wrapped in the warmth of the moment, they realized that their love-hate relationship had only made their bond stronger.

And if dealing with Klaus's teasing was the price they had to pay, it was a small one. Because for the first time, they knew that they were exactly where they were meant to be—side by side, ready to face whatever came next.

[eunseoksimp]

Between the Lines; Song Eunseok

Pairings: Boyfriend!Eunseok x Fem!Reader

Genre: Angst

Description: the importance of communication and understanding, and the consequences that can arise when those elements are lacking. a relationship in turmoil, leading to frustration and distance between the two individuals.

Warnings: strong language, brief mentions of sex but nothing suggestive

. ݁ ˖ ࣪ . ⋆ * .♡ *:･ﾟ. ݁ ˖ ࣪ . ⋆ * .♡ *:･ﾟ. ݁ ˖ ࣪ .

‘we don’t even make love anymore,’ you had been questioning the physical intimacy between you two, claiming that it had diminished.

eunseok sighed, bending down to undo the laces of his shoes, barely making it through the front door before you had started. it had been a long night, and the initial idea of you staying at his place sounded enticing when it was first proposed this morning, but now he wasn’t so sure.

‘see, you can’t even correct me on that.’

he was starting to get tired of this cycle that you had started, blaming him for something that had gone wrong in the relationship, having heated arguments that often left both parties ridiculously irate before ending up in each other's arms by the end of the week.

it was beginning to become more frequent now, the times where you would take a perfectly good day with minor bumps in the road and turn it into a session where a part of your relationship was at the forefront of the discussion. it also seemed to be a pattern of eunseok bearing the burden of the wrongdoer, having to listen as you droned on and on about ways he could improve.

at first he was reactive, quick to combat any accusations you threw at him, eager to resolve any discontent that lay in your heart, the price to seeing you become at peace, to step away from the teetering edge of your rocky relationship and return back to safer grounds. but everyone had their limits.

‘i’m not answering because i don’t want to argue with you tonight,’ eunseok said through gritted teeth, taking a few seconds to calm himself down before moving away from you into the kitchen, a technique he had recently adopted so that he wouldn’t wrongfully take his anger out on you.

‘stop fucking walking away when i’m speaking,’ you’re following after him, one shoe still on your foot as you engage in some type of awkward hobble in attempts to keep up with his longer strides, probably looking like a crazed woman with the added look of your dress now slipping down your shoulders and the hair that you had spent so long pinning up falling past your shoulders.

‘please, can you go one day without picking a fight with me,’ his back is still facing you as he reaches into a cabinet, inspecting a glass cup for a couple of seconds before slamming it onto the counter. he says nothing else as he manoeuvres around the kitchen, all while you watch him, getting a jug of water from the fridge and filling the glass to the brim before raising it to his mouth and gulping it down, wiping the drops of water on the corner of his mouth away with the back of his hand when he’s done.

‘how can i, when there’s always issues? you heard what they said today, every couple is intimate but us,’ your purse is thrown onto the counter and you move from the spot you had been standing in to stalk closer to him, snatching the cup out of his hand just as he was going to pour himself another glass, just so he could pay attention.

‘you don’t find it weird that we’re meant to be in a relationship but you barely want to do anything with me anymore,’ you’re relentless, refusing to give up until you receive a satisfactory answer from him. it’s silent for a moment, with you looking at him expectantly, waiting for something, anything really. why won’t he say something?

another sigh leaves his lips as he rubs the bridge of his nose, his ears starting to ring. he couldn’t gather the strength to stand in this relatively chilly kitchen to explain to you that basing your intimate life on other people’s experiences was weird. he would much rather prefer to put the whole argument to rest and resign to his comforting bed sheets to sleep.

‘you obsess over the same thing. over and over again,’ he said, his frustration shortening his sentences, a warning that the conversation should be concluded soon for fear of becoming more explosive than it needed to be.

‘i’m sorry i can’t be the picture perfect boyfriend that you so desperately want me to be.’

‘no one’s asking you to be perfect, i’m asking you to fucking love me,’ he could tell you were also getting irritated, your words coming out a bit harsher and you were starting to fiddle with your necklace. he wasn’t so sure how your relationship had turned into this, where his every move was questioned, scrutinised, brutally by you. it made no sense why you were trying to change him.

‘you don’t even say the words, like a fucking coward,’ you chuckle, but not out of amusment, rather disbelief, almost like a coping mechanism to keep any other emotion from creeping in and making you vulnerable. it exposed the root of all your issues, the reason why something so small had blown into what it was now. eunseok had never said the words i love you.

you understood at first, given that you were normally the starry-eyed lover, falling quickly and deeply, and accepting that the way you loved was often different to other people. so when you said it the first time, you didn’t expect much. but two months had passed, and it appeared that maybe you were the only one, and that was when fear started to creep in.

‘what’s so amazing about those three fucking words that make you want to fight me everyday,’ eunseok’s temper was starting to escape from him and he pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes shut in an attempt to calm himself down, but it only fuelled your anger even more.

‘don’t swear at me,’ your finger jabbed his chest as you pushed him back a little and he grabbed your hand before you could do it again, chest rising and falling as he looked at you with a lack of belief in your actions. you were demanding respect but refused to show him the same courtesy.

‘so it’s okay when you do it? but a problem when i do?’ he scoffed, lightly pushing you away from him so he could walk away. he knew that this dispute was going nowhere, and the best thing to do would be to retreat for the night, in hopes that you would eventually drop it.

‘i’m not done yet song eunseok,’ you tried to physically stop him, getting in his way so it was harder for him to leave but he was much stronger than you.

‘cant even get peace in my own house,’ he mumbled as he brushed past you, picking up his coat that had been abandoned on the neighbouring couch and heading towards his room, slamming the door after entering, leaving you standing alone in the dim hallway all alone.

part of you wants to barge right in, to continue the argument, to reach some sort of conclusion that would satisfy the anguish nestled deep inside of your heart. however it was futile- you knew that nothing other than a heated conversation and venomous words would arise out of that, and as much as it seemed to be the contrary you were tired of fighting him too. 

you exhale, debating whether it’s worth joining him in the bedroom or just heading home for the night but you know that leaving here by yourself would only anger eunseok even more.

so despite the rage burning inside of your chest, you trudge all the way over to his room, opening it just enough for you to stick your head in first. he was already under the covers, his body facing the wall. you can’t see his face clearly, but you assume by the way the sheets rise slowly before falling that he was sleeping.

this fight would just have to wait for another night. pushing the door so it was now fully open, you trail inside, the air thick with the remnants of your argument, feeling as if the walls themselves were imbued with the tension that now defined your relationship. the soft, steady sound of eunseok’s breathing was the only indication that time had not completely frozen in the wake of your emotional upheaval.

you undressed quietly, slipping out of your dress and into an oversized t-shirt that felt like a security blanket against the coldness that had settled between you and him. the bed was a large expanse, an ocean that divided you from eunseok’s distant form. 

he faced the wall, the curve of his back a silent statement of his retreat. you slid under the covers, the sheets cool against your skin, feeling the vast, lonely chasm of the bed between you.

memories of better times flickered in your mind, taunting you with images of laughter and whispered secrets, of nights spent tangled together both physically and emotionally. those moments seemed so distant now, buried beneath layers of unresolved issues and unspoken words. you ached for those days when love felt simple and untainted, a stark contrast to the convoluted mess it had become.

you watched the shadows cast by the moonlight through the window, dancing on the ceiling, your thoughts racing. the silence between you and eunseok was heavy, oppressive, filled with everything that had been left unsaid. you longed to bridge the gap, to reach out and touch him, but fear and pride held you back, chaining you to your side of the bed.

the words you had exchanged replayed in your mind, each one a jagged shard that cut deeper every time you thought about it. the accusations, the hurt, the frustration—it all circled around like a storm, leaving you exhausted and emotionally drained. you had both become masters at wounding each other, knowing exactly where to strike to inflict the most pain.

you turned to face his back, whispering into the void between you, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he would hear the silent plea in your words.

‘i just want you to love me,’ you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. ‘i just want to feel like I matter to you.’

the silence was deafening, each second that passed a nail driven into the coffin of your dwindling hope. you closed your eyes, tears slipping down your cheeks, and curled into a ball, seeking comfort in your own embrace. the weight of your unspoken fears and desires pressed down on you, suffocating in their intensity.

sleep came in fits and starts, fragmented by dreams that mirrored your waking turmoil. you dreamt of eunseok, of moments when he held you close, his warmth a balm to your troubled soul. but even in your dreams, he was slipping away, an ephemeral figure you couldn't quite grasp, always just out of reach.

when you woke, the room was bathed in the pale light of dawn. eunseok was still there, his form unmoving, but the divide between you felt wider than ever. the ache in your chest had settled into a dull throb, a constant reminder of the unresolved conflict that hung over you like a dark cloud.

you lay there for a while, listening to the world waking up outside the window. birds chirped, cars drove by, and life went on, indifferent to the turmoil within these four walls. you wanted to reach out, to touch him, to find some way to reconnect, but you were paralyzed by the fear of rejection, of opening yourself up only to be met with more silence.

finally, you couldn't stand it any longer. you slipped out of bed, the cold floor a stark contrast to the warmth of the sheets, and padded to the kitchen. you needed something, anything, to distract yourself from the crushing weight of your emotions.

the kitchen was still as you had left it, a silent witness to the argument that had played out the night before. you filled the kettle, the mundane task grounding you somewhat, and set it to boil. the rhythmic tick of the stove was a small comfort, a steady beat against the chaos in your mind.

as the water heated, you leaned against the counter, staring out of the window at the world beyond. it was a grey morning, the sky overcast and heavy with the promise of rain. it felt fitting, a mirror to the storm brewing inside you.

eunseok emerged from the bedroom, his presence filling the space. he looked as weary as you felt, the lines of tension etched into his face. he glanced at you, a flicker of something—regret, sorrow, maybe even love—passing through his eyes before he looked away, focusing on the kettle instead.

the silence between you and eunseok was palpable, thick with unresolved tension and the remnants of countless arguments. you  sat at the kitchen table, your fingers tracing the edge of your coffee mug, the steam curling upwards like ghosts of your past grievances. eunseok leaned against the counter, his eyes distant as he stared out the window at the drizzly morning.

it had been a night filled with restless sleep and fragmented dreams, and the weight of your unresolved issues hung over you like a dark cloud. the conversation from the previous night replayed in your mind, each harsh word echoing in the quiet of the early morning.

‘we don't even make love anymore eunseok. it’s like we’re falling apart,’  you had said, your voice tinged with desperation and hurt. eunseok’s response had been a sigh, a gesture that spoke volumes about his weariness with the cycle of blame and argument that had become the norm in your relationship.

you couldn't help but feel the sting of his dismissiveness, the way he seemed to brush off your concerns as if they were insignificant. the lack of physical intimacy was just a symptom of a deeper problem, one that neither of you had been able to articulate fully.

he turned from the window, his expression unreadable as he finally met your gaze.

‘i don't want to argue with you,’  he said, his voice tight with restrained emotion. ‘i’m tired, and I just want some peace.’

‘peace?’ you echoed, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. ‘how can there be peace when there's always something wrong between us? we don't talk, we don't touch, we don't even look at each other properly anymore.’

his jaw tightened, a flicker of irritation crossing his face. ‘you’re always so quick to find fault,’ he muttered, turning away from you to pour himself another cup of coffee. ‘always looking for something to fight about.’

the frustration inside you bubbled over, and you pushed back your chair, the screech of wood against tile jarring in the quiet kitchen.

‘i just want to feel like you care, eunseok. like i matter to you.’

he set down his cup with a bit more force than necessary, the clink of ceramic on the counter sharp and angry. ‘you think I don't care? you think I don't want this to work? i’m trying, but it's never enough for you.’

‘trying?’ your voice rose, a mixture of incredulity and hurt. ‘trying means actually putting in effort, not just going through the motions. you don't even say you love me.’

the silence that followed was heavy, the unspoken truth hanging in the air between you. it was the crux of your anguish, the reason why every small argument escalated into a full-blown fight. eunseok had never said those three words, and the absence of them was a constant ache in your heart.

‘you knew from the beginning that I'm not good with words,’ he said finally, his voice quieter but no less strained. ‘i show you I care in other ways.’

‘other ways?’ you repeated, frustration giving way to tears that you hastily wiped away. ‘what other ways, eunseok? ignoring me when i need you? making me feel like I'm a burden?’

his shoulders slumped, the fight seeming to drain out of him. ‘i’m doing the best I can,�� he said softly, his eyes pleading with you to understand. ‘i care but I don't know how to make you believe it.’

the words should have been a balm, a soothing relief to your tormented heart, but instead, they felt like a hollow echo of what you had longed to hear. 

‘saying it isn't enough,’ you whispered, your voice breaking. ‘i need to feel it, to see it in the way you look at me, the way you touch me.’

eunseok’s frustration flared again, his hands clenching into fists at his sides. ‘i’m not some perfect boyfriend out of a romance novel,’ he snapped. ‘i’m a person, with flaws and limits. I'm sorry if I'm not living up to your expectations.’

‘that’s not what this is about,’ you shot back, your own anger rising to meet his. this is about feeling loved and wanted. it’s about not feeling like i’m constantly begging for scraps of affection.’

the room seemed to close in around you, the walls pressing in with the weight of your mutual anger and hurt. eunseok turned away, running a hand through his hair in a gesture of frustration. ‘i’m tired of this, of us always fighting,’ he said, his voice weary. "maybe we're just not meant to be.’

the words hit you like a physical blow, the air leaving your lungs in a rush. ‘so, what? you’re giving up?’ you asked, your voice trembling. ‘after everything, you're just walking away?’

he turned back to face you, his expression a mixture of sorrow and resignation. ‘i don't know what else to do,’ he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. ‘i care about you, but this... this isn't healthy for either of us.’

tears spilled down your cheeks, and you wrapped your arms around yourself as if to hold the pieces of your breaking heart together. ‘i don't want to lose you,’ you said, your voice small and vulnerable. ‘but I can't keep living like this, feeling like I'm not enough.’

‘i do… you know,’ he said softly, the words on the brink of being set free. yet, something small was holding it back. ‘i just don’t know how to show it the way you need.’

tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were a mixture of relief and lingering sadness. ‘i need to hear it,’ you said, your voice breaking. ‘i need to feel it.’

the kettle whistled, a sharp, insistent sound that cut through the silence. eunseok had always struggled with commitment, and try as he might, he could never bring himself to say that he loved you. it was a word that hung in the air between you, tantalisingly close yet perpetually out of reach.

his silence on this matter was a chasm you could never cross, a void that swallowed your hopes and left you feeling perpetually adrift. the fight had laid bare the fundamental disconnect between you. 

it wasn’t just about saying he loved you; it was about everything that word represented—commitment, vulnerability, trust. you had always been open with your feelings, wearing your heart on your sleeve, while eunseok had kept his emotions locked away, guarded by walls you could never breach.

he sighed, a sound that seemed to come from the depths of his soul. ‘i know you’re disappointed,’ he said finally, his voice rough with emotion. ‘i know, and i’m sorry. i just...i don't know how to be what you need me to be.’

his admission hung in the air, a bitter truth that neither of you could deny. you had always known that eunseok struggled with expressing his feelings, but you had hoped that in time, he would learn, that he would find a way to bridge the gap between you. but hope, you realised, was not enough to sustain a relationship.

‘i wish I could say the words,’ he murmured. ‘i wish i could tell you that i love you. but every time i try, it's like something inside me locks up. you know how hard it is for me.’

his confession was a knife to my heart, cutting through the last threads of your hope. you reached across the table, taking his hand in yours. his skin was warm, familiar, and yet it felt like you were worlds apart. 

‘maybe,’ you said gently, ‘maybe it's time we stop trying to force something that isn't there. maybe it's time we accept that sometimes, love isn't enough.’

the tears that had been threatening to fall all morning finally spilled over, blurring your vision. your body shook with the force of your grief, eunseok’s head hung low.

the reality of your situation settled over you like a shroud, heavy and suffocating. you sat in silence, holding on to each other for a moment longer, as if by sheer will you could delay the inevitable. but eventually, you pulled your hand away, the finality of the gesture striking like a death knell.

his gaze finally met yours, and for a moment, you saw a flicker of something—regret, sorrow, maybe even love—but it vanished as quickly as it had appeared. ‘i never wanted to hurt you,’ he said, his voice barely more than a whisper. ‘but i can't be what you need.’

the finality of his words hit you like a physical blow. you had been clinging to hope, believing that if you loved him enough, if you were patient enough, he would eventually open up to you. 

‘why?’ you asked, the single word carrying the weight of all your unanswered questions. ‘why can't you love me the way I need you to?’

eunseok looked away, his jaw tightening. ‘it’s not that simple,’ he murmured. ‘i have my own issues, my own fears. i can't just change who I am.’

‘but i need more,’ you pleaded, tears streaming down your face once more. ‘i need to feel loved, to feel wanted. and you...you can't give me that.’

he rose from his seat, taking a step towards you, then stopped, as if an invisible barrier held him back. ‘i’m sorry,’ he said again, the words sounding hollow. ‘i never wanted it to end like this.’

you wiped your tears with the back of your hand, your heart shattering with every sob. ‘neither did i,’ you whispered. ‘but i can't keep sacrificing my happiness for the hope that you'll change. i need to let go, even if it kills me.’

the pain of those words cut deeper than any wound. letting go of someone you love, someone you had dreamed of a future with, was a torment beyond description. it felt like tearing out a piece of your soul, leaving a raw, bleeding wound that would never fully heal.

eunseok took another step forward, his eyes filled with a sorrow that mirrored your own. ‘i wish things were different,’ he said softly. ‘i wish i could be the man you deserve.’

for a moment, you both stood there, the distance between you insurmountable. 

‘goodbye eunseok,’ you said, your voice breaking. ‘i hope you find what you're looking for.’

he squeezed your hand gently, then let go. ‘goodbye,’ he replied, his voice thick with emotion. ‘take care of yourself.’

you lingered for a moment, your eyes sweeping over the kitchen one last time. the table where you had shared countless meals, the counter where you had stood side by side, cooking and laughing, now seemed like relics of a past life.

with a deep, shuddering breath, you turned away from him and walked towards the door. each step felt like a monumental effort, your legs heavy with the weight of your grief. the hallway stretched before you, a tunnel of memories, each one more painful than the last.

you reached the front door and paused, your hand hovering over the doorknob. you could hear eunseok’s quiet breathing behind you, a final reminder of the life you were leaving behind. swallowing the lump in your throat, you opened the door and stepped out into the corridor. the door closed with a soft click, a sound that seemed to echo through the empty hallway, amplifying your sense of loss.

the world outside continued its relentless march forward, indifferent to the turmoil within. people passed by, oblivious to the silent agony tearing you apart. you stood there for a moment, letting the cool breeze wash over you, trying to steady your breath.

the weight of your unspoken words crushed your chest, each step echoing the finality of your parting. the chill of the evening seeped into your bones, a stark reminder that some endings were never meant to be rewritten.

[teenwolftuesdaytrash]

Stiles sits on a bar stool in Derek’s kitchen. He’s just managed to get Eli to sleep. Or pretend to sleep. Who knows? The kid’s most likely still silently crying on his bed, turned away from the door, from the world that no longer has his father in it.

Stiles can’t blame him.

He holds a paper in his hand with long-dried ink, hand-written, speaking of farewell favors that make him want to scream and cry and leave.

Damning Derek (at least in thought), Stiles tries to read through the tears.

___________

Hey Stiles,

If you’re reading this, then something must’ve…happened, and I’m not able to ask you this one last favor in person. For that, before anything else, I’d like to say I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I let whatever happen happen. I’m sorry I’m asking you this in this way. And I’m sorry for asking what I’m about to ask.

If you’re reading this, then that means I am no longer there. It probably means that despite my best efforts, the universe has decided to play its tricks again and I have left Eli an orphan.

I know what it’s like to grow up without a parent. With nothing but hurt, fear, and anger surrounding and driving me. I do not wish the same for my son.

___________

Then be here, you asshole.

Stiles has to pause to clear his vision.

Be fucking here, he begs. Derek or the universe, whoever would listen.

In the responding silence, he continues on.

___________

So here’s the ask. Stiles, please.

Stay with Eli.

Raise him like I would. (Knowing you, you’d probably raise him better than I ever could.)

Take care of each other.

I’m sorry to say it here, like this, but I want you to know. You two are the most important people in my life. More than anyone, Stiles. More than you might ever know.

The both of you are also the fiercest people I know when it comes to protecting the people that you love. Be the family that I know you can be for one another.

I wish I hoped I didn’t want things to be like this. It’s been years, I know. It’s taken me awhile, but I have been trying to make myself better. I have been working towards making myself deserving. Of you, Stiles. Despite everything, even when Eli came into my life, for me, it had always been you.

You have always had a place in my home. In my family.

I really wish I could be telling you all of this in person. I…wish for a lot of things when it comes to you.

I wish I met you elsewhere. I wish I bumped into you at a bookstore, and we started all this with nonsense quips and your endless wit. I wish I met you in a cafe where we would get off on the wrong foot with you judging me for my coffee order.

Really, I just wish I had a life with you. Something better and kinder. But only because that’s what you deserve. To be completely honest, I would be happy to have any life with you. Even this one, as fucked up as it is. As long as it was with you, and Eli.

I’m sorry I say all this too late. It’s selfish and cowardly. I know, Stiles. I know.

If it’s too much, please, feel free to forget about me.

Please, just. Take care of Eli. Take care of yourself.

Yours,

Derek

___________

It’s all Stiles could do to fold the letter with shaking hands and take a deep, unsteady breath.

He wipes angrily at a stray tear on his cheek, glaring at the stupid papers still held delicately in his hand.

Derek’s last words.

With a flick of his wrist, the letter catches fire mid-air.

Fuck that. I’m bringing you back, you asshole.

[ugotcooneycrossed]

if i find you in this lifetime (it better be the right time)

alessia russo x reader

w/c: ~1.8k

part 3 of 'what can i do'

pt1: what can i do / pt2: so you feel it too?

a/n: girlie pop decided to break hearts so im mending them- enjoy😭

------------------------------------------------------------

Watching her leave hurts- it’s a deep aching that settles low in your stomach and pushes up into your chest and you suddenly feel ill- like you can’t breathe without her here.

The thought that you’ve lost Alessia forever- your person- your sun, stars, and moon- your world. It’s enough to send a wave of nausea all over you again.

It’s not her leaving that hurts, no- what hurts more, is the silence that comes after- it’s radio silent between you two for a while.

In all your time knowing her, you’ve never not talked to each other- whether it be a quick good morning text, or a long conversation during nights before games, where you’re both too nervous to sleep. You always talk.

But now? Now, you’re too afraid to text her to ask if she’s okay, or that you’re sorry and you wish you could take it all back, that you never should have said anything. Because you would rather keep on lying than tell her the truth.

You give her the time she asks for- you wait for her to text you first. She doesn’t though.

Not a single call, text, voice memo- hell, you’d take a letter in the mail at this point- but nothing ever comes.

Suddenly it feels like you’re thirteen again- just having confessed to your best friend you found girls pretty- and then experiencing the most soul shattering heartbreak a thirteen-year-old can feel.

This time though- it feels about ten times as worse.

Knowing she had loved you too- knowing that she was just waiting for you to say something.

You wish you would’ve said something sooner- or nothing at all, you don’t know anymore.

You can’t think. You can’t feel- without her.

When you think of Alessia you’re reminded of home- it’s the only way you can explain it.

The way her smile send a wave a warmth through your body- till you feel your heart swells with love.

The way her touch causes your skin to heat up- goose-bumps trailing after her fingertips.

Maybe it's the way Alessia always seems to catch your eye in a crowded room. Maybe, it's the way she always personally seeks you out in a crowd. Maybe even, it's the way she gently links your arms together- no matter where, or how far you're walking.

Maybe it's just her.

Something about her makes you crazy- it makes your heart beat a thousand times faster, and stop in your chest all at the same time.

She’s your everything.

You can only hope that you’re hers too

She’s your everything.

And now you have nothing.

-

Your saving grace comes in the form of Ella- and not Leah and it leaves you confused, if not a bit hopeful.

I mean if her best friend’s coming to speak to you, it might be something good.

“Hey (y/n).”

Ella on her part- doesn’t let any emotions show, her voice is even and she looks at her feet when she speaks.

“Um hey Ella. How’s-“

“She’s fine. Can I come in?”

You step aside to let her in- looking behind her, craning your neck in hopes that Alessia just might be lurking somewhere behind her.

She’s not.

“Look- I just came here to tell you that she’s fine, she just needs more time.”

“More time? I mean, how much more are we talking, I feel like I’m drowning here Tooney.”

“How do you think she feels?” 

You swallow down the lump in your throat- stepping away from the other girl. You can feel your heart pounding in your chest and you want to curl up and scream.

“Right.”

It’s the only word you can muster, and you whisper it- looking down at the ground to avoid Ella’s eyes.

Ella looks around your apartment and suddenly you feel insecure- there’s tissues scattered everywhere and probably a concerning amount of take out boxes piled in the kitchen.

“Just some advice yeah? Talk to her- well, let her talk first, but just talk to her. I shouldn’t really be saying anything but, she loves you, and I know you love her too.”

“Thanks, Tooney.”

 “Yeah of course.”

Ella nods her head at you, and shuffles closer to your front door- she keeps her hand on the handle and you watch an internal battle play out on her face.

“Maybe give her a call?”

Ella leaves after that.

You’re left alone in your apartment once again- but instead of a deep heart ache that settles in your chest, it’s a glimmer of hope.

-

You don’t call Alessia- you put off the task for a while, still too nervous to even look at her caller ID without panicking.

Instead, you focus on cleaning your apartment- getting rid of the tissues and take away boxes, you’re just glad Tooney couldn’t see in your fridge, if she did, she would’ve seen the extra dessert you ordered Alessia- her favourite from the place you always order from when she comes ‘round.

You know- just in case.

The sun has long gone down by the time you’re done cleaning and you settle into bed after- only now looking at your phone.

Missed Call from ‘lessi love’

Your heart sinks in your chest and you drop your phone in your panic to call her back. All this time waiting for anything and you miss her call by three minutes. Idiot! You open the phone app and your finger hovers over the call button- should you? What if she’s mad, you missed her call?

In your time spiralling over what to do. You get a text from her shortly after.

lessi love to ‘You’

-> hey- I know you’re probably busy and want nothing to do with me anymore, but I’d really like to talk

You to ‘lessi love’

-> lessi I would love to talk

lessi love to ‘You’

-> mine? tomorrow?

You to ‘lessi love’

-> i’ll be there

-

You’re scared of a lot of things in this life.

Spiders.

Snakes.

Birds flying at you when you walk under trees.

And the one girl you’ve truly loved in this world not loving you back.

You’ve had some pretty tough days- and Alessia, has stuck by your side through them all.

She’s been there when you were at your lowest- she’s been there even on the worst kind of days.

The worst day though? Was watching her walk out of your apartment crying.

A million scenarios ran through your head- but her leaving? It never crossed your mind.  

Because how dare you love her- the way she deserves to be loved.

It sounds ridiculous to be so enthralled by someone- so hypnotised by just one person.

You know.

You’ve come to terms with it now though- even if Alessia decides she doesn’t want anything to do with you anymore.

You’d be okay with that.

You have had the time of your life with her, and you cannot possibly wait your whole life for her- no matter how tempting that sounds.

 -

You feel like a creep- pacing outside Alessia’s apartment, you wipe your hands nervously on your pants and smooth your hair out over again and again.

You must look like a complete and utter fool right now.

The door swings open and you stumble over your feet to stand still.

Alessia looks- well, she looks tired, she’s got bags under her eyes and when she speaks, her voice is hoarse.

“Hey (y/n).”

“Hi Lessi.”

You whisper- eyes softening and face warming up again.

Your resolve to ‘play it cool’ disappears and your chest fills with anxiety again.

You both stand apart from each other- just staring at one another.

Alessia raises her arms up and takes a small step forward.

“Can I have a hug? Please?”

Alessia’s voice cracks and she sounds like she wants to cry again- you must take a while to respond because you watch her face fall, and arms slowly drop again.

Before you can think you dive towards the other girl- arms slotting right under her arms and gripping her shoulders. Her strong arms find their home on you, and she wraps her arms around you.

You both stand in her doorway- just hugging, holding each other so tight.

“I missed you so, so much.”

Alessia whispers into you, and you feel tears wet your neck- you sniffle, tears now rolling down your face too.

“I missed you too­- so, so much, I was going crazy without you.”

“We should probably go inside.”

“Yeah.”

Neither of you make a move to leave and it sends Alessia giggling.

You smile- missing her laugh.

“Okay seriously- let’s go inside.”

Alessia pulls out of the hug first- grabbing your hand instinctively and leading you inside. She pulls you gently to her couch and pushes you down to sit.

Alessia sits tentatively next to you.

A thick silence falls between you and you suck in a breath.

“I-“

You laugh again- both trying to speak at the same time.

“Let me go first- please.”

You nod at her, closing your eyes.

“Look- I’m sorry I completely ignored you for a week. I just- I really needed to think. (y/n)- I think, I think I have always loved you, it just took me a while to get it. And when I did I was scared- like so, so scared. I never wanted to lose you. So, I just pretended. And waited, and waited for you to say something- but you never did. I waited for your love- but the more I waited, the more unattainable you seemed. I tried to forget about you I swear- I love you so much and I never wanted to lose you. I’d rather be just your friend than anything else.”

You reach out to hold her hand- and she gladly accepts.

“Less- I have loved you since the moment I met you, you’re the most important person in my life. I thought you were happy with him- so I never wanted to ruin that for you. I’m in love with everything about you. This week has been the worst week of my life. I never want to go without you again. You’re my everything, I have never loved anyone the way I love you­- I don’t want us to just be friends.”

You’re panting now- chest heaving.

Alessia smiles at you and links your pinkies together.

“You’re my person too- you’re the only one who understands.”

“Does this make us girlfriends?”

“I hope you’re going to ask me properly (y/n).”

“Right. Alessia Russo, will you be my girlfriend?”

You make a dramatic show of getting down on one knee and holding her hand- one hand over your heart, smiling like a lunatic.

“Of course, you weirdo.”

-

“I kind of want desert- you know, from that place I like.”

“Umm we should go back to mine then- I missed you so much that I ordered one every night- in case you’d show up, there’s still one in the fridge.”

[doc-pickles]

waking up in vegas | matthew tkachuk x hughes!sister (pt. 7)

series masterlist

summary: you work through some doubts before Matthew comes home from his road trip

warnings: none :)

a/n: i knooooooow you all wanted smut in this chapter and I promise you’ll get more but not today. I hope you enjoy!!

xoxo

nina

You’re in overthinking mode.

It’s been nine days since your first phone call with Matthew. And every night since then you’d both enjoyed your nightly phone calls a little more than usual. The way his voice is able to bring you to orgasm is driving you insane and you can’t wait for him to be home tomorrow.

And that’s where the overthinking comes in.

If you and Matthew hook up (which you most definitely will) what does that mean for your relationship? Sure you’re married and having a baby and living together but… All of those things seem separate rather than conjoined as they would be for a couple.

Yes, you’re married but it was an accident that you were still trying to correct.

Yes, you’re having a baby but it’s the product of a lot of tequila and bad choices.

Yes, you’re living together but it’s only because of said baby.

If you sleep together again, will it complicate your… whatever you had with Matthew? You don’t think it can constitute as a relationship, but just calling it a friendship seems like a disservice. You and Matthew had a long history together that would now be intertwined forever with your child. And even though you didn’t know what that would lead to you were excited to see where the two of you ended.

“We have plenty of time to worry before Daddy comes home tomorrow,” you smile down at your baby bump. It seems to have popped out lately plus with the way the baby had been kicking you nonstop it was hard to ignore the little one growing beneath your skin.

To keep yourself occupied you clean the house for the first half of the day before you decide to make cookies. They’re a chocolate and peanut butter recipe that Matthew used to beg you to make during the summers when your families would be at the lake house together. More than once the two of you had snuck out to eat a plate of them on the back porch together.

The smell of the cookies brought back some of your favorite memories of your youth with Matthew and all your siblings. Hockey games, late night ice cream runs, lake house shenanigans, countless holidays, and shared vacations all flash in your mind as you stand in the kitchen scrubbing dishes. Your situation wasn’t ideal, being pregnant and married to someone you weren’t really in a relationship with. But you realize with a start that you love Matthew, you have for years. And while that love might not be romantic, you knew it would be more than enough to carry your unconventional little family through whatever came your way.

You’ve just pulled the cookies out of the oven when you hear the security alarm beep before the front door opens. You check the time with a frown. It’s a little after 6 PM and Matthew isn’t due home until early tomorrow. It couldn’t be him coming into the house, but you weren’t sure who else it could be.

And then you hear him call out your name.

“Baby, where are you?” Matthew calls out from the front room. His voice is laced with a level of need and desperation that you feel deep in your soul too.

You round the corner, freezing as you see Matthew standing in the entryway. It only takes a second of the two of you staring at each other before he’s sporting a wide smile. Overcome with emotion you waste no time in covering the few feet between you and launching yourself into Matthew’s arms.

“I missed you so much,” you manage to say as his hands caress your back. “I thought you were back tomorrow?”

Pulling back you meet Matthew’s eyes, noticing the wide grin on his face, “I caught an earlier flight. I couldn’t stay away any longer.”

Every negative thought and worry you’d had earlier in the day slips from your mind as Matthew holds you. Without a doubt you know that no matter what happens between the two of you that he’d never let you down. The boy who’d begged you for cookies and the man who caught an early flight just to hold you a few hours earlier would never hurt you.

You lean into Matthew’s gentle touch, brushing your lips against his as you share a soft and gentle kiss that melts all your worries away. When you pull apart he’s wearing that little smirk you love so much, holding you close to his body as if you’ll slip away if he doesn’t hold tight enough, “Matty I’m not going anywhere, you don’t have to hold me so tight.”

“I’m worried if I let go this will all be a dream and I’ll wake up in a hotel room lonely and missing you all over again,” he mutters against your neck. “Please tell me this is real, that I’m not imagining things here baby.”

You lean back a little bit to meet Matthew’s eyes, “It’s real. So fucking real. I’m here Matty, right in front of you and I’m not leaving.”

The two of you get lost in another kiss, simply holding each other and being content with each others presence. When you finally pull back Matthew furrows his brows, “Did you bake something?”

“I made my chocolate peanut butter cookies,” you laugh as Matthew releases his hold on you to bolt toward the kitchen. When you follow him he already has a cookie in his mouth, a delighted groan leaving his lips. “Good?”

“If I wasn’t already married to you I would propose right now,” Matthew moans out as he takes another bite. “And they’re still warm? Fucking hell woman.”

A deep laugh bubbles out of you as Matthew finishes his cookie and wraps you in his arms again. This time his hand comes down to cup your ever growing bump, “How’s Baby T?”

“Kicking me all the damn time,” you huff. As if to prove a point the baby kicks against Matthew’s hand. “Must get that from you.”

Matthew laughs and kisses you again, this time squeezing you tightly as he holds you close. He pulls back with a smirk and you can’t help the blush that instantly covers your cheeks.

“Why’re you blushing baby,” Matthew runs his fingers across your darkened cheeks. “You miss me?”

“So much,” you breathe out as you lean towards each other, foreheads touching. “Matty?”

“Mhmm?”

“Take me to bed.”

[kenny-the-ken]

Stoned to the Bone

Just before I start I wanted to write a little disclaimer, in this fic everyone is aged up, they are all 18 and this fic is not suitable for minors!! There are mentions of drugs, alcohol, smut, sexual content, swearing and a lot of innuendos. Also this is my first fic so please be nice ☺️

You sat in the dingy upstairs apartment that you lived in with your boyfriend Kenny. You two had been together from fourth grade and you couldn't imagine your life without your orange parka clad boyfriend with his cute fluffy blonde hair that you loved running your hands through. He'd been out for quite a while now trying to score you guys some MDMA for your house warming party. Everyone that was anyone at South Park High was invited.

Y/N: Kenny, where are you?! Xx

Kenny🧡: Omw now, plug took his sweet ass time. Pour me a drink for coming home, and make sure it's got an extra measure in it! Also, got an ounce of weed, can't wait to smoke up next to you tonight 😉 xx

Y/N: You really do know how to make a girl feel special, huh? I'll see you soon, be safe and remember, if those blue lights appear, never fear, just drop a gear and disappear xx

Kenny🧡: I'm right around the corner babe, don't worry, cops have never caught me this far, I doubt they will now xx

You knew better than to reply to him, he was a quick walker and knew plenty of shortcuts. You both still lived in the shittier part of town, the rent was cheap enough for you both to afford, even if you did both work awful, barely meeting minimum wage jobs.

You heard the door clicking open and then shut, the noise of someone walking up the stairs, and there he was, hood up, a shit eating grin on his face. "Who's ready to get fucked up~?" He sang through the house, before entering the living room and spotting you standing in the adjoining kitchen, pouring him a large glass of vodka and coke, although it may as well have just been vodka. You had one poured for yourself and two shots of tequila lined up for both of you. "Tell me Ken, in all the years we've known each other, when am I not ready to get fucked up?" You answered him, handing him his drink as he sauntered into the kitchen, taking the glass from you and giving you a quick kiss on the head.

"He said this MDMA was top notch shit, straight from Europe! The ounce is Super Silver Haze, so we are set for at least a few days darling." Kenny said, his voice muffled due to his hood still covering most of his face. You smiled at him, even when only his blue eyes were visible, he was the most beautiful guy you'd ever laid eyes on, you swore you got lost in his eyes back in fourth grade and you still haven't escaped the maze yet, not that you were complaining.

"Take your coat off, babe, we can afford heating now!" You said, taking a sip from your own glass and shuddering, vodka did not taste good, but it got you fucked up and that's all that mattered. "If you want me to strip for you babe, you gotta return the favour." Kenny laughed out, unzipping his parka and taking his gloves off. Out of his pocket he pulled a baggy, a rock of pure MDMA sitting in it as he placed it on the kitchen counter. From his larger inside pocket he pulled out the aforementioned ounce of cannabis and sat it down beside the baggy. "Fancy a quick bump to start us off?" He asked, taking out his wallet and a bank card from it, starting to crush the rock inside of the baggy. "Is that even a question?" You winked towards him, coming closer to watch his skilful hands at work. You guys have done anything and everything together, you trip sat each other and knew how most drugs affected you, because let's face it, you guys have tried most. When the rock was finally a fine, yellowish looking powder you could feel the excitement building within you, and Kenny noticed. "Babe, I know you're excited but I'm taking the first hit, if I die from it you know I'll be back tomorrow morning anyway, you on the other hand, that doesn't happen to." He stated, and you knew it was true. He always took the first hit of anything you guys scored, he just wanted you to be safe. You smiled warmly at him. "I love you." You muttered softly, giving him a small kiss on the lips. "I love you too, sugar tits." He smirked before pulling out the key to your shared apartment and placing it into the baggy. He scooped up and balanced a small amount of the powder upon it and placed it to his nose, covering his other nostril and snorting the substance in one go. He then placed the key on the counter, sniffing a few times and then made a face like he was going to be to be sick. "Kenny, what's wrong?!" You asked, hurriedly holding his face as you stared at him. "I'm fine, just that drip, man! That is nasty!" He said, gagging slightly. And he wasn't wrong, you took a quick bump yourself and found that you were soon after gulping down your vodka and coke to try and rid the taste that was emanating at the back of your throat. You noticed Kenny was staring at your tits in the low cut top you wore, your skinny black jeans hugging your figure, and boy could he not tear his eyes away from you. "Like what you see?" You teased, a small smirk on his face. "Y/N, my eyes have been glued to you since fourth grade, of course I like what I see." He joked back, and you knew it was true. You were the only two impoverished kids in school, you basically grew up together. You remembered when Kenny used to steal pads and tampons from the local pharmacy for you when you got your period, and how you used to swipe whatever food you could get away with from the grocery store, you both raised each other. You realised you were fading in and out of reality, the drug starting to take effect. Kenny's pupils were large and round, and you soon found yourself cupping his face with both hands and gazing dreamily into his eyes, a small blush dusting his cheeks. "What's wrong, babe? Love buzz getting to you already?" Kenny flirted, wrapping his long, slender arms around your waist, picking you up and setting your ass on the cold countertop. "I don't know babe, I always feel this in love with you so it's hard to tell." You said, your pupils large too. You felt Kenny bring his lips to yours, biting your bottom lip cheekily, and as a small gasped escaped from you, he quickly slid his tongue into your mouth, a small moan coming from both of you as you both passionately made out. Time stood still till you heard a car pulling up, parking and all four doors slamming.

A knock could be heard at the door and you both already knew it was your friends. You could already hear Eric and Kyle bickering outside and Stan sighing. "Hey, Kenny! Get your dick in your pants and open the door!" Stan shouted through the letterbox as you both reluctantly parted your lips from one another. "You better believe I'm taking that ass straight away as soon as they're either gone, or we're in bed!" Kenny said, a small huff of annoyance at having to wait, and at having to try and conceal his already pre cum leaking cock in his tight jeans. He ran downstairs, opening the door and bowing playfully. "Welcome to my Playboy mansion." He joked, stepping aside to let the guys in.

Your apartment was nothing special, it was still decorated how the previous tenants had it, pale grey walls in the living room with black and silver wallpaper, the kitchen was red with white tiles going round it, and the bathroom was blue with a shower in the corner. Your bedroom was the only place you both could afford to decorate yet, and that was for yours and Kenny's eyes only!

"Sweet apartment guys!" Kyle said, waving to you as you added four more shot glasses to the worktop, filling them with tequila and bringing them out, along with the two you and Kenny had forgotten about. "Here's to best friends, amazing relationships, freedom and getting fucked up guys!" You exclaimed as everyone took a shot glass. "Cheers!" You all said in unison, throwing your heads back to take the shots. You all grimaced at the potent taste and the burning sensation in your throats.

Time felt like an enigma, more people arrived, Wendy, Bebe, Clyde, Craig, Tweak, Butters and more that you weren't even aware were coming. Kenny was in the kitchen chatting with Kyle and Stan about some video game while rolling a blunt. You wandered in, looking at your boyfriend with a smile. He winked at you and patted the countertop, signalling for you to sit beside him. You hopped up as Kyle and Stan took a seat at the table. You could hear Eric laughing at some poor, unfortunate girl in the living room, and you gave your boyfriend that knowing look, like a secret language between you both. He handed the half rolled blunt to you. "You're so good with your hands, think you could finish rolling that for me, baby while I rack us a line each?" He cooed, biting down on his lower lip just to tease you. "You read my mind." You said softly. Kenny hopped off the counter and to the opposite side of the kitchen, his back to you three. "What are you guys on this time?" Stan asked, he didn't particularly like weed, his dad had ruined that for him long ago, but it didn't mean he wasn't fascinated in trying other drugs. Kyle wasn't too sure how to feel, it goes completely against his religion to do any of this, but you're only young once, right? "Purest MDMA in South Park!" Kenny exclaimed. "Straight from Europe, you guys want some?" He asked, turned to face you three, bank card in hand, and two skinny, long lines already racked up for you both. "You know what, I'll do it if you do it, Kyle!" Stan declared, feeling butterflies in his stomach, his nerves always got the better of him. "Yeah, fuck it! It's been a shit week and it's Saturday! Let's make the end of this week amazing!" He said, both boys high giving each other, then turning to fist bump Kenny. He racked two more lines for Stan and Kyle and turned once again to face you all, making deep eye contact with you as you stick your tongue out to like the skin you were rolling the blunt in, sending him a flirty wink, which he gladly smirked back at. "Damn girl, you really gonna tease me like that?" He flirted back, a smile on his face.

Rolling up a bank note he placed it up his nose, snorting the line he prepared for himself. He sniffed again a few times after, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand. "Who's next?" He said, holding up the bank note. "I'll go!" Said Kyle, doing the same thing Kenny did and then coughing slightly afterwards. "It tastes like shit, man!" He shouted, downing whatever drink he had in front of him. "Yeah dude, that's the drip!" You said, laughing slightly before taking the bank note yourself and sniffing the powder in one swift motion. You passed the note to Stan who nervously did the same and reacted almost the same as Kyle. "Just stay away from Wendy for a few minutes dude, the drip makes you wanna throw up and you do that when you're completely sober around her!" Kenny said, laughing slightly before picking you up and spinning your round, his hands wrapped tightly around your waist, your thighs coming up to his sides. "You look so fucking hot right now." He said, kissing you gently before pulling away to stare at you once more. Your cheeks were flushed, a mixture of what Kenny had just said and done and the drugs and alcohol you had taken. He carried you into the living room, Stan and Kyle quickly following, Kenny placed you on the sofa and quickly connected to the speaker, handing you a lighter to spark up your blunt with, you inhaled the thick smoke and exhaled it with a long sigh, you hadn't felt this amazing since the last time you two did MDMA together, and that was one messy night.

The four of you sat and chatted, taking a few bumps here and there while you all smoked the blunt in rotation. It was as if the rest of the party didn't matter. Other people were taking their own drugs, people on ketamine, ecstacy, and god knows what else, it was South Park after all. And they knew you and Kenny didn't give a fuck.

Before you knew it you had finished the entire baggy between the four of you, the party heating up as the place was packed with people. Outside was dark and the street lamps shone brightly. "Hey guys, a new nightclub has opened down the street, it's supposed to be amazing! Wanna go?" Eric shouted loudly over the music. Everyone stared at him, mulling the words over in their fucked up minds. "Fuck yeah! Why not?!" Kenny shouted, turning off the music. "I could dance, let's go guys!"

The walk felt like a blur, you don't even remember how you got there, just how soft Kenny's hand felt in yours as you walked together down the street. The nightclub luckily let you all in without ID, and surprisingly didn't think any of you were on anything. When inside the place was huge, hundreds of people on the dance floor, flashing lights and loud techno music filled the air, this night was turning out to be one to remember. Stan was finally talking to Wendy with enough confidence in his fucked up, MDMA filled brain without throwing up on her, result! Kyle was chatting to some random girl in the corner of the dance floor when you and Kenny heard one of your favourite songs come on, you knew it was a sign from the gods above as the song blasted loudly through the speakers. He took your hand in his, his fluffy blonde hair reflecting the flashing lights in the club, you swore he looked like angel sent from above as he gripped your waist tightly almost scared to lose you as you both started dancing, first giggling and playing around and soon enough grinding against each other needing some sort of contact through the buzz you guys were feeling. Fuck, this felt unreal.

"Kenny." You moaned loudly enough for him to hear. "You like that baby?" He asked, pushing his hard cock against you a bit harder. "And what if I do this?" He whispered into your ear, a long stripe licking up the front of your throat, before his mouth attached to the side of your neck, licking, biting and sucking on the skin that was sensitive when sober, so this felt like you could touch the stars. The song had changed and you still both remained on the dance floor, practically eye fucking each other, hands roaming everywhere, anywhere, just to get some sort of friction.

"Fancy a bump of coke?" He whispered to you, a confused look on your face. "You really think I'd leave us with nothing?" He laughed, as you both, hand in hand made your way to the smoking area, standing at one of the tables. "I'll get us drinks, you crush that shit and I'll be back asap!" He said, pointing to the bar in the smoking area, you just nodded obediently.

You got to work, crushing it up in the baggy and smiling to yourself. You heard Eric shouting behind you with Kyle, Wendy, Stan and Butters. They approached your table, watching you carefully make two thick lines on the table as Kenny came back, two double vodkas in hand, no mixers. "Where'd you all come from?" He joked, handing you your drink and rolling up one of the notes he had received back as change. He snorted it quickly so you all wouldn't get caught and thrown out, you did as he did and giggled slightly after taking it, both of you downing your drinks. "How the fuck are you both not dead?!" Butters shouted loudly, Tweak and Clyde finding your group in the crowd, and all of you chatting among each other. Kenny handed you a cigarette and put one between his lips, lighting it and passing you the lighter, as you lit it you felt an arm snake around your shoulders, pulling you close to his body. You looked up at your boyfriend, giggling to yourself. He whispered something to Stan and Kyle as they all nodded, the music too loud for you to know what they were talking about. They began laughing as Eric too joined in the conversation. "I'm getting some more drinks!" You shouted loudly, as you walked over to the bar, everything spinning round you, boy you loved this feeling, and knowing Kenny felt the same was even better.

You turned around to see Kenny standing a few meters from you, staring at you as you came back to hand him a drink, a soft smile on his face as he stared at you. Fuck, he was the luckiest guy in this club, in South Park, fuck it, in the world to be able to call you his. You both understood each other like no one else did, not even your parents, you guys had been through everything together, and that's why he was going to make sure you were his girl for life. He had a ring back in your apartment and wasn't sure when to propose, but he was going to, just not while you were both fucked up. "I told the guys after this drink that we're gonna go home, my cock and I have some unfinished business to attend to." He said, winking and stealing a kiss from you. "Can we all dance before we go?" You pleaded, and Kenny just simply nodded. "Whatever you'd like, Princess." He said. He knew clubs like this would never end well with a pretty girl on your hip, some other douche always had to press their boundaries, and you were his girl, no one else's.

Your large group headed back to the dance floor, as a throwback banger came on. The first song you guys listened to together at the very first party you had all ever been to, it was like a movie, you all sang (shouted) along, badly. "DON'T YOU WORRY CHILD, SEE HEAVEN'S GOT A PLAN FOR YOU!" You all screaming in unison, dancing like lunatics when the beat dropped. You truly did have the best group of friends that anyone could ask for, and to top it off, the best partner in the entire universe, he little would and has died for you, just to make sure you were safe.

Your eyes became hyper fixated on your partners face as you sang to each other, tears of joy both steaming down your faces. Kenny couldn't believe how beautiful you looked as he turned to give the guys a knowing look, he let go of the grip he had on you and got on one knee, giggling to himself, not even having the ring on his possession. "WILL YOU MARRY ME, Y/N AND MAKE ME THE HAPPIEST GUY IN THE WORLD?!" He shouted and you swore your heart skipped a beat, the guy you got married to in the playground all those years ago now finally asking you for your hand in marriage, together, both of you, together, forever. "OF COURSE I WILL!" You shouted back, as he picked you up, spinning your round with him on the dance floor, all of your friends chanting and cheering loudly.

"Now if you'll all excuse us, I'm gonna go home and fuck my fiancée!" Kenny exclaimed loudly. Everyone erupted into laughter as you both made your way out of the club, not even making it home. Kenny had pinned you against a wall in a dark alleyway, two streets away from the club, one hand gripping your thigh up to his side, the other massaging your boob, his cock already buried deep within you, your moans filled the air, it wasn't long before you were both reaching orgasm together, Kenny chanted your name like a mantra, and you screamed his name loudly, your thighs pulling him as deep inside you as he could manage, his cum painting your insides, both equally as breathless as each other.

"How 'bout we go home, we smoke a fat blunt each, order some takeout and cuddle the rest of the night?" Kenny suggested, a small smile on his lips as he watched you pulling your jeans up, still breathless and legs weak. "That sounds fucking perfect." You replied, giving him a passionate kiss before taking his hand in yours. "You better be careful kissing me like that, baby, you know how high my sex drive is, I'll end up fucking you the rest of the night." He said, a smirk on his face, throwing you a quick wink. "Oh, I'm aware Mr McCormick." You flirted back. "Won't be long till you're Mrs McCormick." He replied, a large and genuine smile on his face, you could see his little tooth gap and your heart soared. You get to spend eternity with the only guy you've ever loved, and if that isn't perfection, I don't know what is.

sorry it was so long!! I really hope you enjoyed it!! I'm gonna try writing some more, so please let me know what you think and if you have any requests, hit me up!!

[bullet-prooflove]

I have an ask for Jubal Valentine 🌹 The prompt is 3. You know you gave me all that time. Well, did I give enough of mine? Thank you so much.

You worry about Jubal, about the fact that since taking up the position with Fugitive Task Force, that you don’t give him the time or attention that he deserves. It hits particularly hard because this man has walked through fire for you, almost compromising his career and all you have to give him is yourself.

It doesn’t seem like it’s enough, especially on nights like tonight when you come home and he’s half way through cooking a meal for the two of you because he knows you won’t be able to face the task after the case you’ve had in Maryland.

“I worry that I’m not doing enough.” You tell him as you lean over the kitchen island. “That I’m not around enough.”

“Ok, doing enough what?” He says with an edge of amusement to his voice. “What do you think you should be doing more of?”

You pause then because truthfully you don’t actually know, you just know you should be giving more. You try to explain that to him but it comes out in a jumble, a mishmash of words and feelings.

“Stefani.” He says gently setting the knife down that he’s cutting peppers with so he can make a T with his hands. “Time out.”

It’s the sign you both use when things are getting a little dicey. You get in your own head sometimes, especially when you’ve run yourself a little ragged. He clasps your face between his large hands before he places a kiss upon the tip of your nose.

“When was the last time you slept?” He asks you. “Or ate?”

You lower your gaze and he knows exactly what’s going on with you.

“We’ve talked about this.” He says softly, his forehead coming to rest upon yours.

Your mental health always suffers when you don’t look after yourself. You’re blood sugar dips, it makes you emotional, irritable, compounded with the lack of sleep it’s a recipe for interludes like this. It’s why he’s been packing snacks into your go bag.

“I’m sorry.” You whisper as his thumb chases over the apple of your cheek.

“You never have to apologise to me. This is just a bump in the road.” He murmurs as he looks into your eyes. He means it, the two of you are a team. You’ve seen him through his relapse, the issues with his son Tyler. Your relationship, it’s never been one sided, it just seems like that because you’re in the midst of a blip. “We get some food in you, a good night’s sleep, I promise you you’ll be as right as rain.”

He isn’t wrong, the next morning when you wake up things seem a little bit lighter. You feel more like yourself and you know that’s because of Jubal, because of the way he cares for you, looks after you.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” You tell him as you lay tangled up in each other in his navy blue sheets.

“That’s funny.” He smiles, his lips brushing over yours. “Because I don’t know what I’d do without you either.”

Love Jubal? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

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[quiet-onset]

me and mr. jones

pairing: steve rogers x reader

wc: 9.6k+, sorry

summary: you're with bucky, so why does steve want you so badly?

warnings: smut with a plot, so minors DNI!! unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), cheating/infidelity, and slight exhibitionism so pls don't read if that's triggering, steve is a bit of an ass but he has a beard so it cancels out

a/n: tell a friend to tell a friend... she's baaack. but fr, i'm making my comeback. thanks to @brattylyricist for being my beta reader and putting up with how feral i get for thee steve rogers

You hated Steve.

He was pompous, self-righteous, and stubborn. He always had to get the last word in an argument and hated to admit he was wrong. He was certainly and undoubtedly the man you loathed most on this Earth.

But he was also your boyfriend’s best friend. So, when Steve temporarily moved in with you and Bucky after moving back to New York, you made do because you were utterly smitten with James Buchanan Barnes. They’d been best friends for nearly a century — who were you to say no?

Not much changed. Except for the constant arguing between you and Steve, most of them for insanely petty things. Take this morning, for instance. You stood in front of the stove on a late Monday morning making a hearty breakfast for you and your boyfriend. Notice how Steve was not part of the equation.

The boys arrived home from their long run just as you had finished setting his plate on the dining room table. Bucky smiled at you as you poured a glass of juice, pulling out a chair as he kissed you noisily on the cheek. “What is all this?”

“I made brunch. Tony said he’s not especially busy — said I could take the morning.” From your right, you heard a quiet scoff from Steve. “Something to say, Steven?”

“Not at all.” Steve said, biting his tongue. He retrieved a bottle of water from the kitchen, ignoring how you glared at him from behind the partition.

“Well,” Bucky interrupted, “That was very thoughtful of you, baby. Thank you.”

“Of course. I hope you like it!”

“You’re not joining?”

“Still cooking. Oh, that reminds me!” You hurried back to the kitchen, suddenly remembering the pancake still sitting in the pan of the hot stove. You call back to him as you flip it over. “Besides, I’ve been snacking the whole time, so I’m kinda full.”

Steve walked by you and rested against the countertop. He eyed the nearby plate of bacon and went to pick up a slice, but you smacked his hand away. Steve let out an indignant sound as he snatched his hand back, “What was that for?”

“Did you make any of these pancakes?” You asked sarcastically.

“What’s your point?”

You could both hear as Bucky muttered a quiet here we go around a bite of his food, but you ignored it.

“My point is that unless your name suddenly changes to James, none of this is for you.” You replied. “I suggest looking in the pantry for cereal.”

“Seriously? You cooked an entire continental breakfast just to be immature?”

“Oh, I learned it from the best.” You threw a fake smile in his direction, batting your eyelashes. 

Steve scoffed, blood boiling in his veins. He didn’t know when you learned which buttons of his to press to upset him, but you did a hell of a job. Worse, he knew he was giving you the exact reaction you wanted. You wanted to see him angry, to make him upset. It amused you to see the oh-so-great Captain America get pissed off because of your pettiness.

One, two, three, Steve counted in his head, taking deep breaths. He was not going to let you win today. He walked to the pantry and pulled out a bagel instead, making sure to bump your shoulder as he padded over to the toaster. It barely broke his stride, but it nudged you forward, your hip hitting the corner of the counter. Then, he walked back to the fridge and bumped you again, this time almost throwing you off your balance. “Steve, you little—“

“Can you two go thirty seconds without fighting please?”

Bucky’s question hung in the air as you and Steve glared at each other. The look in your eye was intense, angry even. You hated how easily Steve got to you sometimes. His mere presence got you heated, and you dreamt of the day he’d move out. You loathed how smug he looked, almost as if he were taunting you, urging you to keep going. To give him a reason.

Pop!

You flinched when Steve’s bagel popped out of the toaster, grumbling to yourself as you turned on your heel toward the exit of the kitchen. “I’m gonna get ready for work.”

Once Steve was satisfied with his breakfast of a bagel and fruit, he joined Bucky at the table. His best friend shot him an exasperated look, and Steve’s brow went up defensively. “What?”

“Do you have to torment her?”

“She started it! She went out of her way to mess with me.”

“I swear, it’s been a year and a half, and you two still act like children.” Bucky shook his head.

“She is the problem, not me. Just ‘cause you let her boss you around doesn’t mean I will.” Steve knew the comment was a bit harsh, but he couldn’t help it, a scowl etched into his features. “Don’t know how you deal with her.”

Bucky only chuckled as he bit into a slice of bacon. “It’s because I love her, man. She’s the first person, besides you, to see me for me.”

Steve could tell that his best friend’s feelings for you were real. The look in Bucky’s eyes, Steve had only seen once before — and that was back in the forties. His face lit up when you entered a room, and he grinned every time you pecked his cheek. He could never say no to you, never even wanted to. Steve couldn’t understand how Bucky fell in love with such an insufferable brat, but it didn’t matter. You made him happy, so Steve learned to make do.

“Besides,” Bucky continued mischievously, “you have no idea how bossy she can really be.”

Steve’s brow furrowed at the statement. The longer he looked at the smirk on Bucky’s face, the quicker the realization came. Oh, that kind of bossy, Steve thought. He shifted in his seat, feeling hot all of a sudden. Sure, he and Bucky sometimes discussed their intimate lives in the past, but never while in a relationship, and never about you. He lets out something akin to scoff, doing his best to seem unimpressed, uninterested. “Does she at least make it worth being bossed around?”

Bucky leaned forward and lowered his voice, “You have no idea. Nine rounds, back-to-back, in one night. Nine. She’s the only woman I’ve met that can handle the serum’s effect on the libido.”

“Wow, happy ending every night — good for you.” Steve’s response came out with a playfully sarcastic sneer, but inside, he started to feel cramped, heated. Like he needed to crawl out of his own skin to rid himself of the fever. He settled for digging his fingernails into the meat of his thigh, an action that goes completely unnoticed by Bucky. 

Suddenly, Steve’s breakfast was infinitely more interesting than that conversation.

“Well not every night. Got let her rest sometime, y’know?” The brunette replied with a smirk, blissfully unaware of Steve’s need to douse himself in cold water. With that, Bucky stood from the table, taking a few strips of bacon from his plate and dropping them onto Steve’s, right next to his untouched blueberries. “Don’t let her see.” 

As Bucky left to prepare for work, Steve sat at the table. Blunt nails left crescents in his thighs as a shuddering breath passed through his lips. He stared at the bacon — food you’d made just to piss him off.

When you came back into the room, a lilac dress adorning your body, he looked up. The fabric clung to your curves and flowed out at your hips, highlighting the expense of your legs. If you noticed his gaze linger on your thighs, you didn’t mention it. You only glared at him when you saw the bacon on his plate. “That wasn’t for you.”

He picked up a slice, took a bite, and smirked, “I know.”

—

The auto shop was the only place Steve could escape from you.

After he retired as Captain America, he became a mechanic. He knew a decent amount about cars and learned the rest on his downtime. It gave him purpose, work that he could do with his hands. Creating, fixing, helping, that’s what Steve was good at. So the auto shop became like a second home. It was nice and easy, uncomplicated, which was exactly what he needed.

It seemed, though, that complicated always found Steve.

Ever since Bucky had uttered those words to him, the tiniest description of his sex life, Steve’s mind began to wander. You had always been attractive to Steve — he wasn’t blind. But the constant arguments you and he had put him off from having any lewd thoughts about you. But now, with this key piece of information, his mind was racing with the possibility of you.

He found himself wondering how your body would react to the lightest touch, what noises you’d let out. Steve bet they were sweet, a satisfied hum resonating through your heaving chest. But, of course, they’d get higher-pitched, breathier as you got closer to the edge.

Desperate. The word was probably not even in your vocabulary — at least not with Bucky.

You had him whipped. The man gave you anything you wanted without question. For the briefest moment, Steve thought the unthinkable: I could make her desperate.

That was when Steve knew he had to find something to do. Something with his hands, his brain, a problem to solve. That way, he’d be too busy thinking of potential solutions than worrying about his own moral dilemma. So he slid underneath an old, broke down pick-up truck and got to work. 

He finally managed to propel you from his thoughts, replacing each dirty vision of you with thoughts of what parts he needed to order. That, until his phone rings.

He slid from under the truck and wiped his hands on a nearby rag before grabbing his phone. And, of course, it’s you. The woman he loathed, the woman he was fantasizing about, calling his phone just as he managed to get a grip on reality.

He answered in a huff, “What?”

“Before I say what I need to say, just know that I didn’t want to call you.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. That fucking attitude. “Then why call?”

“Look, you’re my least favorite option, Rogers.” She added, matching his energy. “I called Tony, but he told me to call Bucky. I called Bucky. He’s wrapped up in a super secret SHIELD meeting that he can’t get out of, and he told me to call… you.”

“Bucky said to call me?” Steve pinched the bridge of his nose, knowing that he was about to do whatever she needed him to. For his best friend, of course. What other reason would he have?

“His exact words were ‘Well, if you don’t call Steve, I’d have to get you an Uber and you’d have to leave your car’ so—“

“What’s wrong with your car?”

“It broke down. Won’t start again.”

“Fine.” Steve was reluctant as he gathered his tools and a few spare parts just in case. “You in walking distance?”

“No, I’ll send my location, just hurry up.”

She hung up before he could reply, and he let out an inward groan. Before he could get too angry, he took a deep breath. This was not for you. This was a favor for his best friend. That’s what he told himself when he got into his car and followed the GPS to your location.

Steve pulled up in front of her car about twenty minutes later. He frowned when he noticed another car parked behind yours, and a man speaking to you, from his rearview mirror. As he exited the car and grabbed his tools, he could hear the backend of your conversation.

“C’mon sweetheart! You don’t want my help?” The guy asked with a condescending smirk. “I could fix you up real good, promise.”

“I’m waiting for someone already, thanks.” You told him with a tight-lipped smile, arms crossed over your chest.

“She’s waiting on me.” Steve called out. He slammed his door closed, striding over to you. As much as he absolutely loathed you, he didn’t want to see any harm come to you. He was Captain America after all. Chivalry was practically in his blood. He didn’t see how your eyes widened as he stood beside you, giving the man a hard glare. “You can go now, buddy.”

“Hey, I was just offering my services.” The guy defended.

“She doesn’t need them.”

“What? Is he your boyfriend?”

“Yeah, I am her boyfriend.” Steve’s mouth moved faster than his brain could think. He missed your stunned look, your subtle blink of surprise when he stepped in front of you, shielding you from the stranger’s eyes. Steve stared down at him, daring him to say something, anything else. His final warning is low and menacing. “Leave.”

“Fine, man.” The man stepped back, trying to seem nonchalant, like he wasn’t scared out of his mind. “Whatever.”

Steve waited till he drove away to move, his feet crunching over gravel as he turned on his heel. “Thanks for the help.” He said dryly.

It takes you little time to regain your senses, frowning at his smart remark. “Oh, so it’s my fault I was accosted by some creep.” You replied sarcastically. He ignored your comment, instead walking by you toward the hood of your car. You rolled your eyes and mumbled under your breath, “God, you’re such a prick.”

“Hey,” Steve’s tone was sharp as he popped the hood. “That guy would still be hitting on you if it weren’t for me. You’d think a thank you would be in order.”

“You would, wouldn’t you?”

“Unbelievable.” He grumbled. “Look, just tell me what’s wrong with your car or stop talking please.”

“How am I supposed to know? You’re the mechanic.” You snapped at him.

Steve could feel himself getting worked up in more ways than one as he looked up at you from where he bent over your car. His glare was vicious as he thought about letting loose on you right there, on the side of the road. Maybe in the car, against it, or — if he was feeling especially cruel — on the rough, gravelly ground. But he counted in his head, one, two, three, four, five, until his heart rate calmed.

He returned his attention to the car, leaving you to watch him in silence. You thought about his words, his voice echoing in your head. Yeah, I am her boyfriend. What possessed him to say such a thing? You tried to convince yourself that he was just trying to help you, to intimidate that creep into leaving you alone.

If that’s all Steve was doing, it didn’t explain why his faux declaration made your heart skip a beat.

You pushed such traitorous thoughts to the back of your head, watching as Steve messed with this and that under the hood of your car. “Do you even know what you’re looking for?”

“It’s broken, I’m fixing it.” He replied pointedly, not sparing you so much as a glance.

“Fine, fix it then.” You huffed.

You leaned against the car, crossing one ankle over the other as you watched him work. It was then that you started to notice the small things about Steve. The small birthmark on his collarbone. The stretchmarks on his bicep. The smooth, fluid motion of his muscles as he twisted and turned different things. It made heat blossom at the base of your neck, so you turned your attention to the gravel. After about twenty minutes, you leaned under the hood with him, watching as he used a wrench to twist something tighter. “Do you actually know what you’re doing, or should I call a real mechanic?”

“No, I’m just smacking things around for fun.” He responded sarcastically. “I’m done now, try the ignition.”

You practically ran back to the driver's seat, raising the key until you heard the ignition turn over with a purr. Just a second after, cool air blasted from the vents, and you sighed happily, sliding down in your seat. “Oh, thank god.”

Steve tried not to watch through the windshield as the AC blew a bead of sweat between the valley of your breasts. He shut the hood of your car and wiped his hands clean with his rag. “Thank you, Steve. I appreciate your help.” He said dryly, leaning down on your car door with the window rolled down. “You’re welcome, Y/N.”

“Yeah, yeah, thanks or whatever. You can go.” You waved your hand dismissively. “I gotta finish running this errand for Tony.”

Steve watched your car pull off with a screech of the tires, knowing that things are getting infinitely more complicated.

—

It’s worth repeating, Steve hated you. So why was he imagining what you looked like beneath that little lilac dress?

He could practically see it in his mind. Beautiful legs that would wrap tightly around his waist. Arms that could so gracefully wind around his neck. Hands that he was certain were soft, especially pressed into his more calloused ones, rough from years of combat and physical labor. He could picture your silhouette like it was burned into his retinas, the shape of the woman he couldn’t stand.

And why did he say he was your boyfriend? It replayed in slow motion, the words falling from his lips as he stood protectively in front of you. Steve told himself that he was just trying to get that creep to leave you alone. As much as he disliked you, he didn’t want some random guy taking advantage of you on the side of the road.

But deep down, he knew that wasn’t why. Something inside him, in the pit of his belly, wanted you. Romantically, he wasn’t sure — but intimately? Sexually? There was no question, he wanted you. He wanted to touch you. To grab your ass by the handful and leave little marks on your neck until he dragged what he was sure were beautiful noises from your lips. He wanted to bury his fingers, his tongue, and fuck his cock inside you until there was nothing left of the both of them. To fuck you deep and raw and primal until you begged him to stop.

But beneath the very real desire for your body was guilt. Loyalty to his best friend. The same blood that boiled with lust burned with shame. How could he think such filthy things about his best friend’s girlfriend? Steve and Bucky had been through hell together and always dragged each other out. Bucky would take a bullet for him, and vice versa — almost had on a few occasions. What kind of person did that make Steve?

An asshole, obviously, Steve thought.

And so he ignored it. For the next three months, he ignored your petty attempts at arguments and all your smartass remarks as best he could. Every morning when you left for work, he made sure to look elsewhere, not wanting to be tempted by how well your clothes hugged your body. He even had a one night stand, an extremely unusual event for Steve.

And even so, it was uneventful. He met a woman down at the auto shop. She was attractive, they flirted and exchanged numbers, and she invited him over. What they wanted was clear, and they wasted no time. He fucked her hard and fast, toying with her clit to make sure she came, before coming himself, filling up the condom she gave him. Then, he left, and they hadn’t spoken since.

And even still, those thoughts wouldn’t leave his head. For those three long months, Steve was tormented by fantasies of you, and he didn’t know how much longer he could take it.

He laid in bed, dreaming about it. He fantasized about eating your pussy in his sleep. He’d take his time with you, kissing and nipping at your thighs until you begged him, all high-pitched and whiny. Then, he’d take a long, slow lick, entrance to clit, before diving in. He’d draw the ordeal out, pulling away just before you come to suck on your outer lips, just enough stimulation to keep you writhing beneath him. And finally, when you begged prettily enough, he’d let you—

Steve shot up in his bed, panting. His sweat soaked his sheet. What’s worse, his dick was as stiff as a rock, precum staining his gray sweatpants.

He dragged a hand over his face, letting out a quiet, exasperated groan. What am I, sixteen again?, he thought to himself, Having fucking wet dreams?

Steve swung his legs over the side of the bed, deciding that a glass of cold water might help him cool down. He left his bedroom and headed toward the kitchen. Then, he paused, hearing a strange noise. His brow furrowed as he turned on his heel, walking back down the hall slowly until he heard the noise again. And unfortunately, it led back to the one place Steve was dreading.

Yours and Bucky’s bedroom.

Just like Bucky had confided in him, Steve heard you giving orders. 

Go faster, baby. 

Uh-uh slow down, not yet. 

Behave yourself.

If you’re good, I’ll let you come inside me.

Steve couldn’t take it anymore. Every nerve was standing on end as he practically ran to the kitchen, making as little noise as possible. He downed two glasses of cold water, finally feeling himself cool off by the third. He sat on a stool at the kitchen island, waiting for what felt like forever for the noises to stop. Not that he could hear anymore. His heart was pounding in his ears as he tried to forget how you sounded in the heat of the moment. He rested his head on the cool marble and tried to take deep breaths.

But the noises did stop. And you left the room to retrieve water for you and Bucky. But you’re met with Steve, at the island, sitting in the dark. 

“Steve?” Your voice was quiet as it cut through the silence. His head shot up, and you saw his chest heaving. You frowned at him, wondering if he was in pain. “Why are you out here? It’s late.”

“I uh… I couldn’t sleep.”

Your lips parted in surprise, taking in a sharp breath as you hoped that Steve didn’t hear yours and Bucky’s late night activities. Thankfully, Steve couldn’t see you blush in the dark. Without another word, you walked across the room and opened up the fridge. The warm light of the fridge shone on you, and he managed to catch a glimpse of your silhouette. His eyes quickly trailed over your body, which was covered by Bucky’s white t-shirt. Your legs, though, were bare — soft and inviting.

He looked away before you closed the fridge and turned around.

He heard your footsteps pad away, then stop. When he lifted his head again, you were walking over to his side of the island. You didn’t stand too close, just an arm’s length away. Your voice was missing your usual bite when you spoke.

“A couple months ago, when my car broke down and that guy was bothering me… Why did you say you were my boyfriend?”

Steve almost froze at the question. What was he to say? He took the briefest moment to think, to find some statement that, at the very least, seemed neutral. “Just wanted to get that creep to leave you alone. I’m not a monster.” Steve said. He followed it with a shrug, trying to seem nonchalant about the ordeal. “Besides, it’s not like we like each other anyway. Why make a big deal out of it?”

You nodded. “Just curious.”

Just then, the same thought crossed both your minds: Maybe it is a big deal.

Steve’s brain short-circuited with that thought, and suddenly, his hand was moving. Before he could think, his thick fingers reached toward you and touched the skin of your bare leg. Guilt settled in the back of his mind as his hand curled around your upper thigh, lightly gripping the flesh there. When your lips parted to suck in a sharp breath, he pulled you closer still.

The air changed. It was thicker, heavy with the weight of the forbidden desire. No matter how deep the breath you took was, it would never be enough to satiate the tension of that moment.

He tugged lightly, slowly, to make sure you had the option of pulling away. That way, he’d know if his feelings, his desire, were just in his head. But you never did. You willingly shifted your weight as he pulled you closer, moving to stand between his legs. His hand reached up just a few inches to catch the edge of the shirt you wore — of Bucky’s shirt. He twisted his index finger around it to pull it taut, releasing it just as quickly. 

“Baby!”

Bucky’s voice called from your bedroom. You practically jumped away from Steve, like you’d been caught. Without another word, you swiped the two long-forgotten water bottles and hurried back to your room.

—

You’d never had a harder time sleeping than last night. Especially not after sex. But you tossed and turned all night, thinking about him. The man you loathed most on this Earth. The man you let touch your bare skin, even if for just a moment, while your boyfriend waited for you in your shared bed.

Thank God Bucky slept like a rock now.

The next morning, when you arrived in the kitchen, Steve was already sitting at the island with a bowl of cereal. You stopped in the doorway when his eyes fell on you. It was like someone had pressed pause on your lives, his hand even stilling with a spoonful of cereal, milk dripping from the convex side. There was nothing either of you could say to make what happened the night before okay. Nor could anything make you forget. So, you both just stared, waiting to see who would speak first.

Then, Bucky approached from behind you, pressing a quick kiss to your shoulder. He started to greet you both, but stopped for a moment, looking back and forth from you to Steve. “You two are not having a staring contest right now.”

You watched as Steve blinked a bit and shook his head, returning back to his breakfast. You let out a breath, forcing out a little laugh. “Well, not anymore. Steve blinked.”

Bucky chuckled and shook his head before brushing past you. “Just when I thought you two had turned a corner.”

You have no idea, you thought to yourself. The thought made your stomach turn uncomfortably. The weight in the air was nonexistent to Bucky, and that makes everything so much worse. Not even in his nightmares would his best friend and the love of his life betray him in that way. But even with Bucky in the room, all you could think about was how the callouses in Steve’s hand felt against your bare skin. The moment was short and fleeting, but it felt like a lifetime.

The hour that breakfast took was uneventful, save for a few passing glances between you and Steve. Bucky led the conversation, as usual, asking about everyone’s plans for the day. Steve planned to work on the old Mustang in the garage. Bucky, on the other hand, had to go into work to finish some paperwork. You had the day off and planned to just relax — which now meant avoiding Steve.

“I’m going to go on a run first though.” Bucky noted, his stool scraping against the floor as he stood up. “Anyone want to join?”

Steve was quick to agree, “I could go for a run.”

“On a thirteen mile run? No thanks.” You quickly answered with a playful scoff. You tried to tell yourself that the frown pulling at the corners of your lips was because you’d miss Bucky — not because Steve would rather go on an excruciatingly long run than be around you. Definitely because you’d miss Bucky.

“I’m going to head to work right after the run, so it’s just you and Steve for a couple hours.” Bucky told you. He pecked you on the lips three times, waiting for your frown to return to a smile. When it did, he kissed you a bit longer, nipping on your bottom lip. “You two play nice.”

Steve cherished every mile of that run with Bucky. He counted the minutes, glancing at his watch every so often. Even when their run was winding down, and they approached the house, Steve offered to go longer. “Another mile or two?” He’d asked Bucky.

“Can’t, gotta head in.” Bucky panted. He noticed the look on Steve’s face but chalked it up to disdain for you. “It won’t be that bad, Steve. It’s a few hours.”

“Yeah.” Steve nodded, wiping the sweat from his brow. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

And then Bucky hopped in the car and headed to work. Meanwhile, you curled up with a book and a mug of tea and sat in the living room, hoping that Steve would just use the back entrance. Of course, you were not so lucky.

Steve entered the house, still in his white t-shirt and joggers. He was planning on changing into some older clothes so he could work on the car, but when he saw you, he stopped. He looked at how you sat on the couch, knees drawn up and resting to the side. By the looks of it, you were halfway through your book, but he still managed to tear your attention from the action on those pages.

“Hey.” It was all he could manage, a single word to fill the empty, potent air.

“Hey.” No snark in her response, he thought. Noted.

“What, um, what are you reading?”

“Can’t you see the cover?” You shifted in your seat, free hand resting on your thigh. You fell back on your defenses, sarcasm and pettiness, to maintain your control. “Or maybe you can’t read, is that it?”

There she is, the fucking brat. Steve rolled his eyes. “Yes, that’s obviously the issue here.” His legs carried him to the other side of the couch. Just resting his legs, he convinced himself. A quick rest before going on with his day.

His eyes trailed over the cover of your book, seeing the cartoon image of a man and woman holding hands, along with big pink bubble letters that spelled out the title, Me and Mr. Jones — obviously some sort of romance novel. Then, Steve got sidetracked. He watched your hand that rested on your bare thigh, your thumb stroking the skin there absentmindedly, when he realized.

That’s the same spot he touched you last night. It’s where he grazed your skin, where he wrapped his hand around to pull you closer. You were stroking that spot so delicately, and you didn’t even notice.

It drove Steve wild. He needed to think about something else quickly.

“What’s it about?” He asked.

Your eyes widened. You curled in on yourself, turning your body to face Steve but pulling the book toward your chest. “Nothing, mind your business.”

Finally, something else for Steve to focus on. It was rare that he had the upper hand, that he could embarrass you. An eyebrow perked up as he smirked at you from across the couch. “What was that?”

“What was what?”

“That.” He waved his hand around at you with a chuckle. “That reaction. Whatever you’re reading, it can’t be that bad.”

“You wouldn’t like it.” The words came out quick and defensive as your eyes returned to the page. Then, Steve did the unimaginable. He leaned across the couch and snatched the book from your hands, laughing as you immediately started trying to retrieve it. “Give it back, you asshole!”

“C’mon, Y/N.” He teased. He held you back easily, keeping the book far above your head. “I just want to see if I’ll like it. Let me read it!”

He laughed as your protests became less and less aggressive, finally devolving into pleas. It was too late though. Steve started to read. Aloud. 

“She…,” He paused at the passage, his vocal cords pulled tight as he read. “She kissed him softly on his neck, nibbling on his Adam’s apple.” His gaze returned to you, noting how you avoided his eyes. “Do you usually read things like this, Y/N?”

Your voice was soft when you answered, taking on a much smaller tone than he’d ever heard from you. “Just give it back, alright?”

His eyes trailed over you, at how you rested on your knees beside him on the couch. You couldn’t bear to meet his eyes, embarrassment clear as day in the faint tint of your skin. It was a new emotion he’d never seen in you. You always had the upper hand, always made the situation turn out in your favor, always got what you wanted. Now, watching you reach over to grab the book, he smacked your hand away again. He was going to make the most of this moment. He wanted to show you what it felt like for someone else to control the situation.

So he kept reading.

“Nathan pulled her back by her hair, holding her still so he could dive in for another kiss. It was desperate, deep, a reflection of the control that was slowly slipping from his grasp. Rebecca managed to pull back for air and gasped. ‘We shouldn’t be doing this.’ She urged, biting back a moan.”

“Steve, c’mon.” You pleaded quietly, toying with the hem of your thin cotton shorts. “I get your point, just gi—”

“But he just wraps a hand around her throat, squeezing softly. He was…,” Steve paused as his eyes skimmed ahead, “He was past the point of caring. All he could think about was her body, her noises, her pleasure. Nathan should absolutely not be kidding Rebecca like this, touching her like this, but—” He nearly choked on his own breath, eyes locked on each and every minute squirm of your body, on the way you shied away from his gaze. He finished the line from the book in a low whisper, “But that only made him want her more.”

You both knew what was happening. It was the loudest silence you’d ever heard, the only sound being your quiet heaving breaths. It was a silence that reeked of disloyalty, a sweet temptation that was almost too good to ignore.

During that silence, Steve realized that he understood exactly how Nathan felt. Like the character from your book, Steve was running out of patience, out of self control. He couldn’t find the strength to move away from you, and if you didn’t move soon, he was going to do it. He was going to betray his best friend. He was going to take what he wanted from you. His last line of defense only came when he saw your eyes slowly look up. He noticed the quick pause you made at the evidence of his arousal beneath his sweatpants, the soft fabric straining against his growing bulge, and he’s two seconds away from losing it.

“Y/N, if you don’t move to the other side of this couch right now, I won’t be able to stop myself.” Steve’s warning was slow and rough.

And suddenly, it’s all too real. In so many words, he’d confirmed that he had these feelings too. The same conflicted feeling that pounded against your chest every day for three months. An identical increased heart rate, just like when he said he was your boyfriend. He’d been thinking about you, too. When you finally met his eyes, they were unlike you’d ever seen them. Dark and greedy, pupils already blown out, leaving only a thin blue ring. 

You tested the territory softly. “What if I don’t want to?”

“Move.”

The singular word was more like a growl. One last chance at stopping this, at saving your relationship with Bucky.

Instead, you scooted closer. Just enough for your knee to brush against the outside of his thigh. You leaned over and reached across his lap, taking the long forgotten book from his hand. He looked almost relieved, thinking that you were going to take your book and return to reading in solitude. But his hands clenched into fists when he heard your soft voice once more.

“‘I don’t care.’ Nathan panted as he bit down on her earlobe.” You read softly, slowly, making sure every word sinks in. “‘We’ll deal with the consequences later. Right now, I have to have you.’ Neither he nor Rebecca had the chance to protest before Nathan… before Nathan slid ins—”

The passage was cut short when Steve pulled you closer by the nape of your neck, his lips pushing feverishly against yours. Your surprise lasted for but a moment before you melted into him, and your eyes fluttered closed.

His hands squeezed at you, at the back of your neck and at your hip, wanting you closer. One hand snatched the book away and threw it somewhere behind the couch. Just as quickly, Steve’s hands pushed you backward, your back hitting the fabric with a soft thud. He didn’t hesitate to pull your legs apart, slotting himself between them as he leaned over to kiss you once more. You gasped at his sudden manhandling, and he used the opportunity to slide his tongue into your mouth, drinking up every little noise that fell from your lips.

His hand slid up your back and into your hair, pulling you away for the briefest moment. He could feel every nerve standing on end when you tried leaning back in to kiss him again, desperate to feel his lips on yours. Still, he held you back by your hair, groaning at the little whine you let out. The tip of his nose just barely ran up your throat as he breathed in and inhaled the raw scent of your need. 

“Why couldn’t you just fucking move, huh?” 

He growled out his question, mostly to himself. There’s a tiny voice — caution, loyalty — nagging at him to stop. That making out with his best friend’s girlfriend was wrong. That thinking of all the ways he was going to bring you to the edge of ecstasy was immoral. But Steve’s eyes were glued to your every movement, to the way your back arched and how your hands clutched onto his white t-shirt. And he can’t stop. Steve was the Nathan to your Rebecca. He had to have you.

Still, you silently contemplate the question as well. Why didn’t you move? What about him was so infectious, so undeniable that you needed him to touch you, if only to know what it’s like? He licked and sucked at your throat. His rough hands gripped at your outer thigh, pulling them close to his hip. Every movement was so sure, so certain. He knew what he wanted, and he was going to take it — the thought made you squirm beneath. 

The shameful thought that crosses your mind breaks your heart: Bucky never touched me like this. She should be mortified, embarrassed. 

Instead, her hips buck into Steve’s.

“Thought about this for so long.” He murmured against the sensitive skin of your neck. He bit down, making you cry out, before soothing the spot with his tongue. “Dreamt of doing the filthiest things to you. And then last night, all those fucking noises.”

You tried to hide your burning face by covering yourself with your arms, but Steve was quick to pull them away. “That why you’re always such a brat? Never been put in your place?” He asked, his tone a bit condescending.

It’s shameful, the way your mind jumps to Bucky, to how he pampered and spoiled you, even in the bedroom. Even worse was the desperate mewl you let out at Steve’s tone, shaking your head.

“Don’t worry, pretty girl.” Steve mumbled, pressing wet kisses down her body. Down, down, down, until he was kissing the waistband of your cute little cotton shorts that always drove him crazy. “We’ll fix that attitude right up.”

You counted yourself lucky that you lifted your hips in time for him to yank your shorts and panties down in one swift yank. You were sure that he wouldn’t have hesitated to tear them off of you. There was no time for you to feel bashful or shy about bearing yourself to Steve — as soon as the soft fabric left your skin, his hands were pushing at the back of your knees, up and out, so he could get an eyeful of your glistening pussy.

“Fuck.” He was entranced, mouth falling open as he pushed his index finger past your lips, through your juices. “All this for me, pretty girl?”

“Mhmm.” You hummed as your eyes fluttered closed.

“Use your words.” His eyes caught yours as his finger just barely brushed your swelling clit, and you knew it wasn’t an instruction. It was a warning.

You bit back the urge to say something snarky as you normally would, knowing that he wouldn’t hesitate to deny you what you wanted. “‘S for you. It’s all for you.” You moaned softly.

Steve could see the reluctance in your eyes and chuckled to himself. He was going to enjoy this. Maybe that was why he was so attracted to you. Because you were such a smartass, a brat. He liked that you fought him, taunted him, teased him. That meant that there and then, with you squirming below him as he licks through your dripping cunt, tonguing at your clit, he could break you down.

He saw right through that tough, bossy girl facade. He was going to tear you down, destroy you, then build you up again. Even if he never got to touch you again, he wasn’t going to let you forget that he could reduce you to a quivering, moaning mess.

A dream come to life is the only thing to describe it. Steve buried his face in your cunt like it was oxygen and he, a suffocating man. His stubble stung deliciously as his tongue flicked back and forth over your clit. Then, when your moans and whimpers became more frequent, more high-pitched, he’d back off — drag his tongue down to your opening to drink up the juices he’d pulled from you so effortlessly. Even when you buried your fingers in his hair, trying to pull his tongue back to your clit, desperate to come, he just pinned your hands down by your hips, continuing to lick, suck, and tease.

“You don’t come until I say so.” He mumbled into your pussy, his beard drenched in you. “Now, keep these legs open, pretty baby.”

When his tongue returned to your soaking core, you swore you were going to explode. The pleasure was almost torturous, twisting in the depths of your belly like it wanted to rip you apart from the inside out. Instinctively, your thighs started to tighten around Steve’s head, and he let out a moan against your swollen pussy lips. The vibrations almost overtook you, but he pulled away before you could fall into bliss, letting go of your wrists to smack you hard on your inner thighs. “What did I just say?” He said, his gaze dark as he stared at you.

“Can’t help it.” You admitted softly, a whimper escaping your lips when one of his strong hands stuck between the valley of your breasts and up to your neck. “Need it so bad.”

“Do you? ‘Cause you haven’t even asked me nicely. You can’t want it that badly.” He feigned sympathy for you as he crawled back up your body, lips brushing against yours as he spoke.

“I wanna come.” You whined, brow furrowed in desperation.

“You should’ve thought about that when you were being a smartass.”

Before you could complain, he tugged you up by his grip on your neck, pulling at your limbs until you were sitting on his lap. Your mind took a minute to catch up to Steve’s manhandling, but he regained your attention when he pulled his t-shirt off. Your eyes trailed over his torso, over the thick muscle and strong pecs that you suddenly had an overwhelming desire to squeeze.

He snapped his fingers, “Hey, eyes up here.” You almost feel embarrassed by how quickly you followed his instructions, just barely shrinking under his smug gaze. “If you want to come, you have to work for it. Earn it.”

At first, you weren’t sure what he meant. Hadn’t you earned it by now, you thought. Lying there with his tongue pushing in and out of her cunt, his lips sucking on your clit, without being allowed to come seemed like torture enough. But when he shifted his hips beneath you, pressing his clothed dick into your puffy folds, you gathered his intentions.

You moved your hips forward once, experimenting with the feeling. And when you let out a much louder moan than you anticipated, you suddenly understood how far he’s willing to go. The soft fabric of his sweatpants brushed across your already sensitive pussy, leaving the faintest tinge of a burn on your skin. You could feel the heat of him, feel him twitch beneath you as you ground your hips desperately against him.

All the while, Steve looked on with a smirk. He could practically feel the reluctance evaporating from your body. He saw the way your shoulders drooped, the way your head lolled and your eyes almost rolled back in your head. He kept careful watch of you, listening as your moans got more desperate, even bracing your hands on his shoulders to grind down harder. But he stopped you, slowed your pace, leaving you dangling off that edge with a whine. 

In response, he let out a smug chuckle. “Did you think it’d be that easy? You’re not getting anything until you beg.”

Beg? You hadn’t begged for anything in your life. Not with your parents, not with any of your exes, and certainly not with Bucky. That was where you drew the line. You just wanted him to give you what you wanted. Without thinking, your hands drifted down his torso, reaching for his waistband. You hoped that maybe if you could touch his cock, just once, he’d give in and fuck you.

Before your hands could reach their destination, he snatched up your wrists in one hand. He tugged you forward so that your pussy was pressed firmly against his shaft beneath his pants. His eyes bored into yours, and you suddenly wondered when he became this intimidating.

“That might work on your little boyfriend, but it won’t work on me.” He gritted out. “You’ve got one more chance before I lose my patience.”

Steve should have felt guilty for saying that. He should have paused and stopped what he was doing. But he didn’t. Objectively, it was wrong, but his dick twitched in his pants nonetheless. Nothing was going to stop him short of your saying no. He was going to utterly ruin you for other men — including Bucky.

You’d truly underestimated just how long he was willing to edge you. He kept the same routine each time. You ground your pussy on his clothed cock until there was a large wet patch on his crotch, a mixture he was certain was mostly you with a bit of him. He’d wait longer and longer each time, letting you get closer and closer but never letting you fall over into your orgasm. You lost track after the fifth time.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. You were wound so tight that you were sure you would explode from the tiniest touch, if only he’d let you. Steve even added on to the heat coursing through your body, cooing meanly at the desperate tears building in your eyes. At last, you whimpered the word that he’d been waiting to hear, “Please.”

Steve’s brow perked up, “Speak up, pretty baby. Can’t hear you when you mumble like that.”

“Please.” You’re louder this time, clearer, tension rolling off your back as you succumbed to him. “Please, I need to come.”

“Doesn’t sound like you’re asking.” He teased.

“Please, can I? Can I please come?” It was then that you finally let go of all defiance, giving in to Steve. You didn’t want to be a smartass. You didn’t want to be a brat or make him angry, like you usually did. Then and there, all you wanted to do was let him make you come. A tear fell down your cheek as you begged, and he cupped your cheek, brushing it away with his thumb.

“There she is. All obedient and compliant. Just needed someone to fix that attitude, huh?”

He smirks at the way you nodded wantonly, loving how absolutely wrecked you looked. Now that you’d finally given in, he’d give you what you wanted. He was a man of his word, after all.

He pulled you off of his lap to which you’d closed your eyes and let out a whine, “You said—“

“I know what I said, pretty baby. I’m gonna make you come, don’t worry. Gonna make you cum till you’re begging me to stop.” He told her, bending her over the arm of the couch. Suddenly, his hand was in your hair tugging your head up. Your back arched as he leaned over you, his lips against your ear. “He could walk in any minute now.”

Your eyes shot open as you realized he had you facing the front door. Neither of you knew when Bucky would be home. Stop him, a voice called from the back of your mind. Don’t go any further. Don’t do this. Then, you felt the head of Steve’s bare cock pushing through your folds, your juices leaking onto his shaft.

“And you’re still gonna let me fill this tight pussy up, aren’t you?” You could hear his hand slide over his cock, spreading your wetness over the shaft.

Filthy. Wrong. Immoral.

“Yes.” You sighed out prettily.

Stop. Degenerate. Selfish.

“Let me hear you say it, pretty girl.” His tip nudged at your entrance.

Bad. Depraved. Shameless.

“I want you to fuck me.” 

Too late.

His cock stretched you wide, pulsing steadily as he pushed deeper inside, letting out a long moan. He used his knee to spread your legs wider, and the tip knocked into your G-spot. Your eyes rolled back as your orgasm built quicker than expected. Pleas began to fall from your lips without hesitation. “Can I come, Steve? I can’t hold it — please say yes!”

“Go ahead, pretty baby. Come on my cock.”

Like his voice controlled your body, your cunt fluttered around him. You let out a loud moan, crying out his name. If you had your wits about you, you might’ve been worried about the neighbors hearing. But you could barely hear your own voice, ears ringing as your body quivered. The pleasure crawled up your spine, exciting every nerve along the way. Had it not been for Steve’s hand in your hair holding up upright, you’re sure you would’ve collapsed.

“Shit.” Steve let out a groan and leaned back a bit, his hands pulling your ass apart to get a better view of your twitching pussy drooling all over the length of him. “Better than I fucking imagined.”

There was no chance to gather your bearings before he started thrusting into you, deep and slow. He was reaching so deep inside you, punching places with his cock that you didn’t know existed. All you could do was take it, your pussy gripping him like a vice.

“This what you wanted all this time?” He leaned over your body to mumble in your ear. “Haven’t been properly fucked in so long, have you?”

Your cheeks burned at how easily Steve was able to see through you. You only responded with a loud whine as he bit down lightly on your earlobe.

“Been reading those dirty little stories to get your fix. Me and Mr. Fucking Jones, hm?” He let out a teasing chuckle. “You won’t need those books anymore, pretty baby, I got you.”

The knot in your stomach was wound so tight, you could already feel the ache in your core. You were shocked, stunned that you could feel so sensitive after only coming once. But that was exactly what he wanted — overstimulated from the start. When his cock started passing over your G-spot with every thrust, you reached a hand back, pressing it weakly against his hips. “‘S too much!” You moaned, twisting your neck to look at him with wide, pleading eyes.

“Uh-uh, this is what you were begging for, baby. You can take it, c’mon.” He pulled your hand behind your back, using his grip on you as leverage for his thrusts. A deep groan vibrated through his chest when your cunt squeezed around him, your ass bouncing off his thighs. “That’s it, you can do it. Tell me you can take my dick.”

You keened at his praise, whimpering as his tip pounded into that spongy spot inside you, bringing you closer and closer to orgasm. “I c-can!”

“You can what, honey?”

“I can take it!” You moaned, fingers clutching onto the fabric of the couch. “Oh my god, please don’t stop!”

“Good girl.” He pressed harder on the hand behind your back, watching your spine curve in a deeper arch. “So fucking pretty. Gonna come again for me?”

You couldn’t even manage to hold it back. Just hearing the words good girl sent you into a spiral, pussy spasming uncontrollably as your thighs shook. Cloud nine didn't even begin to describe the euphoria that washed over you. Each wave was stronger than the next, and Steve’s nonstop assault on your G-spot didn’t help. You vaguely heard him talking you through it — aw, that feel too good, pretty girl? that’s right, keep squeezing my cock, fuck you’re so wet — as you pushed your hips back, meeting him thrust for thrust.

“So fucking tight.” He gritted out, punctuating each word with one hard thrust of his cock. You felt his cock twitch inside you, and he let out the smallest growl. “Fuck, you’re gonna make me come.”

“Want it.” You moaned, body jolting with each thrust. “Want you.”

Suddenly, his arm was around your neck, pulling you up so his chest was pressed against your back. “This is my pussy now, baby.” He panted, his breath hot in your ear. His blood was pumping too fast, too hard for him to feel bad about what he said. “Day and night, you’re fucking mine, you got that?”

Your eyes were glued on the front door, even as his words made your pussy flutter. The tiniest shred of remorse seized your heart, and you shook your head, hands gripping his forearm around your neck. A few tears spilled down your cheeks, a pitiful mix of guilt and desperation. “No.” You whimpered as your eyes fluttered closed. “No, I c-can’t. What about—“

“Don’t lie to me.” He growled, watching your body shiver when he pressed two fingers hard on your clit. “You might feel bad — Hell, I might, too. You’ll kiss him, you’ll sleep next to him, you might even love him. But this cunt? She’ll fucking drool at the thought of my cock, won’t she?”

You didn’t answer. You both knew the answer, only confirmed by how your cunt pulsed around him. He rubbed your clit in tight, fast little circles, wanting to hear you admit it. “Won’t she?”

You squealed, the oversensitivity taken to a new level as the pain and pleasure attempted to rip you apart from the inside out. You whimpered and nodded — too late for shame, for modesty.

“Say it, baby. Say it like a good girl.”

“I’m… I’m yours.”

His cock twitched inside you again, bringing you closer to your orgasm. His arm pressed your throat, only slightly cutting off your air. You were lightheaded in the best way, feeling the pleasure creep up on you as Steve groaned in your ear. He told you to say it again, and you did. You kept saying it, kept telling Steve that you were his, that your pussy was his, until you could barely think of anything else. Even as his thrusts started to get sloppy, you moaned Steve’s name, feeling the start of your orgasm take over.

“That’s it, pretty girl, milk my cock dry. Take all my fucking come.”

Even still, under all the noise — the slapping of skin against skin, the squelch of your pussy as his cock drove in and out of you, your moans, his filthy words — you heard the click of a lock.

Your eyes only caught his for a brief moment before the pleasure crashed over you, before Steve turned your head and pressed his lips against yours, groaning as he felt you shake and come undone beneath him. All teeth and tongue, you whimpered into the kiss as you felt spurt after spurt of warm come fill you up. He thrusted hard and deep, pushing his cock further inside you until the come seeped back out, dripping down your thighs. As his tongue glided across yours, he knew he never came harder in his life. And, perhaps, unfortunately, neither had you.

You were panting into each other’s mouths, riding out your highs, when his voice called out your name, then Steve’s, quiet and hurt. His best friend. Your boyfriend. Your Bucky.

Fuck.

[wishitweresummer]

Workout Jams (GeorgeNotFound x Sapnap)

Word count: 910

This is for @sleepy--anon ‘s Ler!Sapnap week! I know it’s delayed. I actually wrote it quite a while before the week had started and wasn’t sure what to do. I want to move back into regular posting, so here’s to kick that off!

Participate in the week here!!!

Day Two - Gym Day

“You’ll like this one!”.

“I don’t like working out. I’m strong enough.”, George shook his head. Sapnap scoffed.

“We got a new machine! Just try it for a bit, dude.”.

“I’ll get too buff. Buff George.”, he smirked. Sapnap laughed and shoved him. George shoved him back fast. Instantly, they were grabbing and shoving at each other.

“Idiots!”, Dream yelled, just trying to get through the living room without catching an elbow from one of his roommates.

“Tell George to workout with me for just today!”.

“Tell Sapnap he’s being a baby and can workout by himself!”. Dream simply waved them off and headed into the kitchen, not acknowledging the argument at all.

Despite the dramatics, George giggled as he followed Sapnap into the gym. Sometimes, they fought just to fight.

~•~

George yawned obnoxiously, making Sapnap giggle as he dropped the weights back down.

“And your music sucks.”, George said quickly as he nudged the speaker with his foot. Sapnap scoffed and laughed. It was George’s playlist, and George probably knew that and said it anyway just to bug him.

Really, he deserved what was coming.

Sapnap slid out of the machine and gestured to it.

“It’s called a seated leg curl. Sit in it and put your thighs under this roll-y thing.”.

“Okay. But, only because you’re begging.”, George said as he climbed into the machine. It was a little awkward; him getting in wrong. Sapnap adjusted him with a little amused huff, making George scowl.

“Now lift it up with your legs.”, Sapnap said. George strained his entire body, but it wasn’t budging. The younger tsked at his struggle.

“Move. I’m getting out.”, George snapped, embarrassed he couldn’t move it an inch when Sapnap hadn’t had any trouble at all.

Sapnap smirked and stayed put.

“Try again, let me feel your muscle.”.

“No!”, George yelped as Sapnap grabbed his thigh and squeezed it. “Quit that!!”, he shouted before breaking down into laughter. He grabbed for Sapnap’s hand, but they both were shoved away. Sapnap used his free hand to grab one of George’s and hold it to his chest. With only one hand prying at Sapnap’s, he was screwed. A loud shriek flew from his lips before he dropped his head back and wailed with laughter. The machine jolted with his panicked moves, but he couldn’t squirm free. The spot Sapnap was targeting was particularly bad; directly above his knee. His entire leg was practically vibrating. It was torture. “Sapnap!”, he screamed.

“George, don’t scream like that!”, Sapnap laughed.

George hasn’t seen this attack coming in the slightest, and there was something about the spot and situation driving him completely crazy.

“DREAM!!!”, he screamed. As the cry for help started, Sapnap ducked down and turned the music louder. The bumping rap hopefully drowning out George’s noise. Sapnap chuckled at the bewildered look on George’s face, then moved his hand quickly up to attack his upper thigh instead. George squealed and thrashed helplessly.

“It’s just us, kitten.”.

“You’re an idiot!”, George yelled and bucked uselessly against the hold the machine had on him. “Please stop!!”, he whined through his desperate laughter.

“Oh, begging?”, Sapnap teased.

Sapnap was blocking George from twisting out of the machine. He jumped his hand up to suddenly tickle into George’s stomach. The boy burst into a flurry of embarrassingly high giggles.

“Getting a good ab workout?”, Sapnap smirked.

“I hate you!”, George shook his head through his giggling.

“Oh yeah?”, Sapnap narrowed his eyes before lifting up the hand he had been holding onto so he could tickle right into his armpit. George screamed and flopped in the machine loudly, almost moving the roller on top of his thighs.

“Get out! Get out!!”, he cried as he pried at Sapnap’s hand. Uncontrollable laughter poured from his lips as he sunk into the machine helplessly. “Fuck!!”.

The entire time he was being tickled, he was desperately trying to break free; exhausting himself. His laughter was bubbly as he bucked against the chair, Sapnap teasing at his ribs.

“Why!”, George squealed loudly as Sapnap found a bad rib.

“I want to help you get big and strong.”.

“Well I hate you!”. Sapnap shook his head and latched back onto his thigh, making George scream. He threw his head back and laughed hysterically, starting to tear up.

“The music is too-“, Dream voice boomed into the gym, but drifted off as he took in the scene he walked into.

“Dream! Help!”, George cried.

“What’s going on?”, Dream asked with a grin, walking into the gym to get a better look.

“We are working out George’s abs.”, Sapnap giggled, moving down quickly to lower the music. Then, he grabbed George’s hand again and dug back into his ticklish thigh muscles. George shrieked and bucked, exploding with laughter again at the unexpected grab.

“Help!!!”, George cried.

Dream grinned and put his hands on his hips.

“Sapnap, just make sure he doesn’t get hurt.”.

“I wouldn’t let Gogy get hurt!”.

“I know, I’m just saying.”. George screamed in frustration, his face growing warm as he was ignored. The squeezes attacking his thigh were maddening and there was nothing he could do. Dream and Sapnap talked over him like he wasn’t even there, but that devious hand was still playing with his thigh muscle.

“Great workout jams, by the way.”, Dream said as he knelt down to turn up the music. Then, he left them alone again.

“No!!”, George cried.

[anitalianfrie]

Oh! Absolutely 20 for rosquez!

things you said i wasn't meant to hear - rosquez

this was difficult to write. like. really difficult. i fear it might suck. alas, it's all i produced.

Marc slowly walks through the corridor. The walls are rough, painted of a faded yellow, and the rigs and bumps push against the skin of his knuckles while he drags his hand against one of them.  

For some reason, they remind him of home. 

He’s not used to being here. He feels like an outsider- no, like a stranger, in between the sturdy walls of the ranch, old and stained. He can feel it, in his bones and in the air: it’s not his place to be in. It’s Valentino’s. But Vale told him, mouth sweet of promises and sticky with kisses, with his strong accent and his esses that he hisses like a snake, mi casa es su casa, and Marc, mouth stretched large in a laugh, believed him. 

He can sense it in the air, in its staleness, the bitter taste of distrust. Of quiet wariness. They leave a bad taste in his mouth. He can feel it in the polite words of Bagnaia and Bezzecchi, he can hear it when Vale doesn’t let him go get the bread from the baker and sends one of the boys instead. 

He can’t do much about it, and maybe that’s what’s worse. How he didn’t care about these people’s opinions up until he arrived there, and understood how much they meant to Vale. How much he wanted them to accept him.  

He finds himself missing Alex, when he thinks too much about it. 

His hand meets the end of the wall. His small moment for himself is over. The door in front of him is slightly opened, just enough for him to be able to see in the room. He can see the back of someone’s head, a mop of curly hair, too light to be anyone else’s. Vale is there.  

He reached down, to the handle, to push the door open, when a voice from inside the room stops him. 

“You should talk to him.” it’s Luca. He sounds– he sounds serious. It’s a tone Marc has rarely heard him use, in the week he’s been here. 

“I know.” 

Marc knows he shouldn’t stay there, the knowledge of being impolite drilled into his head by his mother from a young age, when she had found him hiding behind the kitchen door, eavesdropping. Still, something inside tells him: this is about you. You should listen.  

He’s too weak not to. 

He’s too weak not to worry. Who else should Vale talk to? The thing that stetches between them, thin like the thread of a cobweb, dangling in the air, is fragile and new. Marc knows it, and Vale knows it too. It’s there, and day by day they are putting down bricks, layers to build up on. But as of now, a too strong breeze might end up ripping it apart. Marc doesn’t have the certainty it will happen, but he also doesn’t want to try. 

“It’s just–” Valentino continues, “I can’t help but feel that this happening is my fault. That him feeling like this, is my fault.” 

Marc can hear Luca sighing from the other side of the door. 

“Listen. I’m not going to say that it’s completely not your fault, because we both know that it’s not the case. But keeping thinking about it– it will do you no good. Talk to Marc. Ask him how he feels, instead of doing your thing where you assume what everybody’s feeling without talking.” 

A moment of silence. 

Marc pushes with his knuckles against the wood of the door. It creaks on its old, consumed hinges while it opens slightly. There are three doors that do it at the ranch, and Marc has memorised them all.  

“Hey” he says, while entering the room, as if he wasn’t hiding up until one second before (as if he wasn’t a liar), and Vale turns his head and greats him with a smile. He reaches out with a hand and grabs him by the waist, pulling him closer, laying his head against Marc’s ribs.  

Luca gets up from his chair. “I’ll leave you two to it.” he says, before closing the door behind him.  

Valentino drags Marc down on the couch, until they’re laying on top of each other, chests pressed together. Marc can feel Vale’s hand on the back of his head, playing with his hair, while he brings their faces closer to kiss, and kiss, and kiss. 

Under his hand, Marc can feel Vale’s heart beating. 

Tu-tum tu-tum tu-tum, strong and fast like the sound of the hooves of a horse on the ground. 

Valentino doesn’t say anything. 

Neither does Marc. 

send me a pairing and one of these and i’ll write a mini fic

[the-redhead-in-a-dress]

So apparently making PikeUna lists is kind of my thing now...

Missing PikeUna or Pike & Una scenes I really wanted to see in SNW:

(Some of which I think have been really well covered in fanfics already)

Talking about La'an! Pike and Una are close, but she'd never mentioned La'an before she boarded the Enterprise, there's no way Pike doesn't beg Una for all of the gossip, or at least tips on how to approach and befriend this new Security Officer.

Honest conversation about Pike leaving Enterprise & Una following Discovery. After having spent much of that career together, that potentially could have been hurtful, especially as Chris didn't want to ever come back, and contemplated not doing so even when hearing she was missing. And even if it didn't hurt her, I think they need to talk about Pike's head space now he's back (even leaving the whole Boreth and the future thing aside). Make this either take place in sickbay (Una's leg was broken!) or after she's released, but I think having it in sickbay and MBenga being vaguely around, getting to see the two of them and their friendship for the first time would be good.

Talking about Una's revelation that she's Illyrian - We got a cute scene where Pike vehemently rejects her resignation and that heartbreaking moment at the end when Una questions whether Pike would have acted differently if she hadn't saved the ship. YET they don't talk about it!!!!!! That's a big deal, a massive secret that she's hid from him from decades. Chris must have so many questions, his head must he swirling. Una is anxious Chris only likes her still because she saved people. There are some big feelings that need sorting out, I can see them both being anxious about bringing it up, but there should have been a scene where they finally talk about it at some point in season 1. Maybe whilst doing the washing up one night it just comes flooding out.

Pike going to see Una after she almost died and had to be stitched up - A mix of fear that she almost died & anger that she could be so stupid & not seek medical attention earlier. I'd have liked to have this scene either take place in sickbay, or Una coming to the Captain's quarters (without approval to leave sickbay) still hurt but knowing that Pike needs somebody given that members of their crew died. A scene, to show their vulnerability with one another and that they have each other's backs.

Una and Pike trading stories after Spock Amok - Preferably a late night drinking scene, or she swings by for a late night snack in his kitchen. They're both in pajamas eating Brie and drinking wine, leaning against the counter. Pike bumping her arm that got shot with the phaser and Una wincing. She ends up revealing that she and La'an participated in Enterprise Bingo. Pike says he's proud of her and La'an for having some fun.

A fun scene between Neera, Una and Pike just after the trial- Something lighthearted to juxtapose the tension of the courtroom. Neera raises an eyerbow at Una 'seriously this guy?!! Have you seen his hair?!" Pike blushes, Una rolls her eyes. Pike is sheepish when he realises that after forcing Neera to travel across the galaxy to defend Una that he doesn't have anyway to return her to Illyria (it's not like the admirals are gonna let The Enterprise take a detour to that Non Federation colony right now). Neera commenting that unlike Una, his dimples don't work on her when he tries to apologize. Neera shakes her head and says she's already got a lift.

Una's return after the trial, Pike recounting all that she missed - Explaining all the stuff he did (abandon Enterprise against Star Fleet's orders, commandeer a spacecraft, go to Illyria, almost asphyxiate, find Una's old friend and the best civil rights lawyer and haul her ass to Earth...all to save his friend and keep Una in Star Fleet. Una yelling at him that he's so stupid to have risked his entire career, everything he'd ever worked for, for just her. Chris telling her quite frankly he can't do this without her, that he wasn't just going to abandon a friend he's had for decades. If they hadn't talked about her being Illyrian already this scene would be even more important. ALL the feelings need to come out here. It's raw, it's vulnerable, they're both crying, there's another hug.

Pike explaining the Illyrians' origin secrets that Spock and he found out (see The Illyrian Enigma comic) - I know he promised the Illyrians he wouldn't reveal it, but I figure Una is fair game, it is her heritage after all. Now that Pike has interacted with more Illyrians, and now know's a major historical secret, this would be an opportunity for Una to share some of her more personal experiences as an Illyrian (maybe). Now that she doesn't have to hide. Una is shocked that Pike reveals there may be other Illyrians in Star Fleet, he asks her what she wants to do. Una tells him she just wants to go back and do her job...but there's tension as she's torn between being selfish (focusing on protecting herself and her career) and helping others out there.

Debrief after Subspace Rhapsody - There's no way Una does not tease Chris mercilessly for lying to his girlfriend and being outed about it in song IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE bridge. On a serious note, I think Chris would also want to talk about Una's song 'Keeping Secrets' and what that meant. I think he'd be hurt by the lyrics of her song, that she always felt alone when he was right by her side through their careers. They'd have to have a tough conversation about the fact that Una had to hide, and she felt she had to to protect him, but also the joy now that she doesn't have to anymore. Something to talk about how things have changed now, and that she's figuring who she is now she doesn't have to hide.

Drinks after Boimler and Mariner go back to the future - Oh what a day. Like I know the episode ends with all the Enterprise crew drinking in Pike's quarters. But like, it would be cute to have a scene with Una giving Pike a birthday present and them talking about how they're actually feeling given events of the day. Like Una has to work through feelings that she's suddenly a Star Fleet pinup in the future even though right now a lot of people in the Fleet hate her. She'll joke about them being ahead of the times in celebrating a holiday (his birthday) 200 years before its cool and Chris would look sad. They'll talk about his future, but also what he wants his legacy to be.

I have more but this is already super super long....

[shaunamilfman]

Speaking of Christmas, I’ve been in the holiday mood because, as I mentioned, me and my firehouse sell Christmas trees each year. So tonight while the Christmas music was bumping and we had some downtime between customers I wrote up some holiday HCs for Jackie/Shauna that I had off the top of my head.

- Jackie is the type of girl to start celebrating Christmas the day after (American) thanksgiving, blasting holiday music throughout the house, whereas Shauna will scream back at her “IT’S LEGITIMATELY STILL NOVEMBER, TURN IT OFF”

- Jackie absolutely has a checklist of things that she makes you all to do so she can have a good holiday. Baking cookies, decorating a gingerbread house, watching specific nostalgic Christmas movies and TV show episodes etc. Shauna will only barely tolerate this because it makes Jackie WILDLY happy.

- Jackie hangs mistletoe up around the house, and will run to meet you or Shauna under it when you’re passing by.

- Holidays aside the only thing that really makes Shauna happy during this time is when you guys take a walk while it’s snowing. She loves watching the snow come down and the relaxed down time with you because you don’t put as much of an emphasis on every moment leading up to the holiday as Jackie does. But you will always agree because seeing Shauna with a bunch of snowflakes caught in her eyelashes and hair makes your heart stop.

- Ms. Jackie Taylor CANNOT cook for the life of her, leaving the holiday dinner up to you and Shauna. Jackie decides to occupy her time with decorating because she was asked to leave the kitchen when something burned because she was left in charge to watch the stove while you and Shauna were trying to wash dishes and she’s j sat on the table texting while smoke billows out of the pot. When you and Shauna finally emerge from the kitchen you see the house is decorated so well it’s like the set of a hallmark movie and Jackie is just sat on the couch nonchalantly waiting for you both.

- Jackie will try to convince you and Shauna to take one of those “matching pajama, family pictures” to send out for holiday cards. Jackie is able to say very little of her plan however, before Shauna shuts her down.

- The holidays are probably really draining for Shauna as she has to split her time between her mom and dad, so she needs a lot more quiet time with you or Jackie. Just laying in bed, lights off, cuddled up to each other where no one talks, possibly watching a holiday movie.

- Shauna has to talk Jackie out of buying every holiday candle scent cause she can’t decide between “Walk in the Snow”, “Christmas Cookie”, or “Pine Wood Forest”

- On Christmas morning Jackie will act like an excited child, waking you and Shauna up at the ass crack of dawn because she’s so excited to give you both your gifts.

- Shauna I can see as a very sentimental gift giver without even knowing what she’s doing. Will give you like a book with information about all the dates you guys had been on with pictures, movie tickets, drawings etc and will be clueless as to why you burst into tears and hugged her.

- Jackie will get you very thoughtful gifts but they’re definitely more, materialistic things. Don’t get me wrong, by no means is it just any expensive thing she thinks you’ll like, she 100% clocked that you wanted something in like April and remembers to get it for you.

Sorry for flooding your inbox with Headcannons of these two, I have JackieShauna brainrot atm. Hope you’re doing well pookie, love ya <3

doesn't everyone start their christmas celebrations the day after american thanksgiving? thats when we always put up christmas lights and stuff. its when they start playing christmas music and shit i think shaunas just a hater on this one lmao

oh god jackie would want to fully celebrate every holiday im with shauna the hater on this one fr.

jackie purposely puts it up in your favorite areas of the house so she can kiss you and you're like "but you could just kiss me anyways?" and she'd just blush and shake her head

shauna loves that it gets dark so early during the holidays fr. she enjoys staring out the window as the snow comes down all broody and shit. i love being shaunas holiday escape omg that's so good. shauna looked so pretty in the snow scenes i cant imagine what she'd look like actually happy in the snow lmaooo

jackie burned water once but she runs the gingerbread house decorating like the navy. shes playing the sims with that icing bag fr fr. you walk out of the kitchen to see jackie standing on like a step ladder on top of a chair trying to put decorations up and both you and shauna are like "!!!!! jackie plssss"

jackie buys shauna the pjs and tells her they're for her. shauna reluctantly wears them and is like "oh hell no" when she sees you both wearing them and tries to run upstairs. yall get the picture but both you and jackie had to wrestle shauna to the ground. the pic is like you with your arm around shaunas neck while jackies pinning her legs down and strewn across her lap. you're both smiling but shauna looks fucking deadly. it's your favorite picture of shauna and you make it your pfp for months.

ugh jackie's ass would burn sugar cookie and pine forest at the same time and make the entire house smell awful. jackie walks in the living room to see you and shauna on the floor gagging while holding the blanket over your noses.

i absolutely do think jackie buys you super sentimental and meaningful gifts that show how well she knows you. shauna is so an experience/sentimental gift giver. she gets you tickets to do something you'd like with her or makes you super sentimental gifts for sure. i love the idea of shauna giving you like little poems shes written about you over the year.

absolutely flood my inbox bro i love talking jackieshauna. i'm doing very well, thank you!