#You’re lucky I like Himbos you beautiful idiot

[tombstones-and-saxophones]

“If [op] was in love with me, I’d know” this and “I’m pretty good at picking up signals” that motherfucker no you are not and no you would not, because I am in love with you and I wrote some rather blatant poetry about you and the blessing of knowing you and I made you read it and you told me you loved it and somehow you still haven’t gotten the memo. The fuck is wrong with you

[aewhore]

Hi I saw your post about writing for AEW, would you be willing to write for Austin Gunn. The idea is that the reader has a crush on him and while they're both training, because of the sexual tension she suddenly reveals her feelings. ( if you can't its totally cool ☺ ) thanks xx

   You’re lucky I love you, Idiot. ~ Austin Gunn x reader (Request by @heranimebeautyghost )

You were working out at the gym in Daily’s place. You had been signed to AEW as a wrestler for just under a year now and it was the best decision you had made in your entire career. You had been wrestling professionally for 6 years now but had never gotten a chance to really show off your abilities until AEW was announced and your small but loyal group of fans made noise on twitter about how they needed to sign you and before you knew it you were on a call with Tony Khan. Since you were signed you got to work with your friends you met when you wrestled in japan such as Trent Barreta, Chuck Taylor and your closest friend Hikaru Shida, but you also got to make new friends in Kris Statlander, Orange Cassidy and the Jurassic Express. When you started wrestling you had swore to yourself to never date another wrestler because you knew how hectic the schedules were and you knew you wouldn't be able to devote enough time to a relationship as you would like but being in AEW during a pandemic really tested that when you spent more and more time with a certain loudmouth member of the Gunn club, the one and only Austin Gunn.  

How did you get into this predicament you ask? Well because of the pandemic, if you want to use the gym you have to sign up for a time slot and since they lessen the amount of people that could be in an enclosed space you might only be sharing that time slot with 1 or 2 other people. Most people opted to use their own home gyms or public gyms but you stayed with the Daily’s place gym. You knew because you prefer to work out later at night that a time slot would always be open. It just so happened that Austin worked out in the same time slot as you did, so you end up spending an hour or two alone together every two days. As you hung out with Austin more and more you couldn't help but develop feelings for him. He was an utter sweetheart even if he was the definition of a himbo. He would distract you from your workout by trying to be your hype man and making you laugh so hard you have to stop whatever workout you were in the middle of to jokingly call him an idiot. You started to develop a soft spot for the youngest member of the Gunn club soon after your workout sessions began. 

You were getting ready to go to the gym the night after dynamite, you were running late because you overslept your pre workout nap. You were now the number one contender after you defeated big swole on last night’s show so you were preparing for an intense workout but you couldn't help break out into a smile at the idea of talking to Austin about your title shot. You arrive at the gym. You see the time slot is open, you hear Austin music already blaring as you walk into the gym. You place your bag down as you take off your sweatshirt and go to start warming up. “HEY Y/N!! I thought you weren’t gonna show!” You hear Austin yell from the other end of the gym. “I could never miss one of our workout sessions Gunn” You say back to Austin as he pulls you into a bone crushing hug, you can't help but appreciate these small moments of closeness you get with Austin because you just knew in your heart that he doesn't feel the same way that you feel for him so you have to hide your bright blush by burying your face into his chest. Austin holds onto you for longer than you expected before he releases you to go back to your warm up. “How long have you been here before i got here?” You ask as Austin returns to his weights. “Oh you know only about 20 minutes, i wasn’t waiting for you or anything” He adorably laughs out the end of sentence as you look over at him and he quickly looks away as if you caught him staring. “Sorry to keep you waiting hot stuff” You wink at him as you playfully flirt with him. He gives a hearty laugh at your attempt to seem cool.  

Once your warm up is finished you start you to make your way over to the ring that's set up in the center of the Gym. You begin to stretch using the ropes before you notice Austin had finished up on his weight and was taking a quick break to have a drink of water. Your eyes sweep over Austin as his arm flexes to bring his water bottle to his lips. You snap your eyes away from him before your thoughts get rated R. You start to run the ropes to distract yourself from the hunk of a man behind you. “Hey, do you mind helping me run through some moves?” You stop running to hear Austin ask, you’re lucky you're not facing Austin as you start to blush immediately at the idea of being so close to him. ��Um yeah sure, i don't mind.” You say as nonchalantly as you can muster up.  

Austin gets into the ring and starts to walk you through a submission move he wants to do in his next match. He was attempting to modify an arm bar to make it more Gunn-like(?) so he claimed. “So.. where do you want me?” Your face goes bright red as you nervously laugh at the implication of your question. Austin does a double take at your question but you see his face go red as you watch his mouth open and close as he tries to format a reply. “Um how about you lay down on the mat?” You and Austin were now dissolving into a full on laughter fit. You lay down on the mat and Austin gets in position for an arm bar, Your arm rests against his torso as he grips your hand in his. He begins to move his legs to hook under your shoulder as he's adjusting himself, he releases your hand and it sits on his well defined pecs and you barely hold yourself back from running your hand up and down his muscular torso. 

You're broken from your lust filled haze by Austin suddenly getting up and offering you a hand up. “Oh did you get it?” You are still seated. “No it’s not working the way i pictured it but it’ll be fine, I’ll figure something out.” Austin says almost saddened that his move wasn’t executing the way he envisioned. You grab Austin hand to help you up but he underestimates his own power and yanks you off the floor so fast you don't have time to find your footing before you brace yourself for the impact of hitting the floor but it never comes instead you collide with Austin's chest as he catches you in his strong arms. Words fail you as you look up at Austin and see he’s already looking back at you. You break eye contact to look down at Austin's lips and then you look back up to his ocean coloured eyes only to see he's looking at your lips as well. “.....Jesus” Austin sighs, your brows furrow “what?” you ask, mentally preparing yourself for the worst. “You look so beautiful right now, it's insane.” 

You were blown away, did Austin really just say that? To you? right now? The air is knocked out of your lungs by pure shock alone. Words fail you as you try to string together some sort of intelligible speech. “Oh my.. Wait, what? You think I’m- really? Are you sure?” If your face was red already now your entire body was on fire. Austin laughed at your jumbled mess of a response. He pretends to think for a moment before he responds. “Yeah I'm pretty sure you're a stone cold stunner” he gave you that thousand watt smile and had you not been wrapped in his arms, your knees would have buckled from underneath you. To hide your ever-growing blush you lean your forehead against Austin's chest as you giggle at his term of endearment. “Aw come on baby doll, don't hide that gorgeous face from me now” You bury your face deeper into his chest as he tries and succeeds to make you blush by showering you with compliments. You're suddenly hit by a sad thought that Austin is just playfully flirting with you like he always does. It's hard not to feel let down by the ideas you had built up in your head not being possible in real life.  You feel Austin’s hand under your chin as he tilts your head up to lock eyes with him. “...please don’t lead me on” you grumble more to yourself than anything but Austin hears you crystal clear and his brows furrowed in confusion as he sees the sadness in your eyes, you move Austin’s arms to allow space between the two of you so you could attempt to control your pounding heart. “Y/N what do you mean ‘lead you on’?” You sigh in frustration as you prepare to tell Austin about the built up feeling you've been having for the last 2/3 months.  

“Listen Austin I know we're just friends but I want to be more than that but I know you don't feel the same way and that’s ok but please don't-” your frustrated venting is interrupted when your pulled back into Austin’s chest and his lips crash onto yours. Your eyes go wide when you realize what's happening before you allow yourself to completely melt into the kiss. Austin's hand rubs and massages your side and trails down to your ass as your hands tangle in his golden hair. You're the one to break the kiss as you rest your foreheads against one another while slightly gasping for air. “Incase that didn't answer your worrying Y/N, I really like you too and I’d actually like to take you out to dinner some time if you'd like” your head was spinning and you were sure if it was from the kiss or from Austin’s confession but you did know one thing for certain. “Yes Austin I’d love to go to dinner with you sometime.” You went to exit the ring to carry on your long forgotten workout when you feel Austin smack your ass. “AUSTIN!!” you say shocked at his sudden forwardness, You look back at him but he looks away innocently “..what? I didn't do anything.” You playfully glare at him when his poker face begins to crack. “You're lucky I love you, idiot.“

[buckysnumberonegirl]

HBCS Week of Love day 2 First date

Three cheers for Iron and Thunder Part 1

Warnings: Fluff, mentions of Himbos, more fluff

Parings: Bucky x reader

Hello loves it’s me Alex! A little note for today’s episode of two love struck idiots, it’s technically the second part of a series! If you’re interested in reading the first part you can find it on my blog titled Midnight Missions!

Or click down below

Prequel

That’s all💕 enjoy and as always reblogs and comments are welcome

Part 2

You honestly weren’t sure what to expect. After 9 months undercover you finally had been back for about a week now and man did it feel good. You were walking down to the compound gym when you spotted Bucky, currently being assaulted with information as Peter Parker followed him around trying to explain what I himbo was.

“No you see Mr.Barnes sir, a good example is like Captain Rogers, he’s strong, respectful and handsome. But on the other hand he’s also not the brightest”

Bucky's eyes met yours and pleaded for help. You laughed at the thought that the 16 year old had this 100 something year old super soldier needing to be rescued.

Peter continued not even noticing you standing there “that’s why he gets all of that fan mail from girls… not that you shouldn’t Mr. Barnes sir I’m sure that you uh any woman would be lucky to have you if you like women um” Peters rambles became more or less incoherent rambling as he realized what he was saying.

You decided to finally step in and save your friend ‘hey Buck you ready for our date tonight?’

Both Peter and Bucky shot you a look, Bucky smiled playing along “Uh yeah Doll, did you have a time in mind I meant to ask you that”

Just as the words left his mouth Tony walked in.

“Well if you’re interested I have a standing reservation at that little Italian restaurant near Strange’s place”

Before even thinking you Blurted out ‘I’ve always wanted to go there! They have a 5 year long wait list!’

Tony smirked “well then it’s yours if that’s okay Mr.Robot.. you’ll have to dress up of course”

Bucky looked at you “I know how to dress when going out with a beautiful woman Tony, and yeah we’ll take it, thank you”

You blushed, he called you beautiful. Of course he may just be saying it so your cover wasn’t blown but you like to imagine that deep down maybe he felt a sliver of what you felt for him.

Bucky came over to you winked “come on Doll, let’s get out of here”

You thanked Tony once again and walked out with Bucky stopping once you were out of earshot.

‘Well James I think you owe me one’ you smiled at your best friend, feeling a touch of sadness creep into you as you thought about the imaginary date.

Bucky smiled looking into your eyes “well, how about a date?”

A hopeful look washed over his face as he asked you. Finally asking you after months of waiting for the right moment.

‘Yeah, I think that would work’

He brushed a piece of hair behind your ear and smiled again “pick you up at 7:30 Y/N” he walked away and you turned. Unbeknownst to both of you, the two of you silently celebrated getting what you had both wanted for months now.

—————

7:25, that’s what your clock said. Each second ticking by painfully slow as you waited for a knock on the door. You looked amazing, your hair fell perfectly and your outfit fit exactly as you had hoped, despite borrowing it from Natasha.

Another minute clicked by when you heard steps outside your door followed by knocking.

When you opened it you were speechless. Bucky cleaned up really well. His black suit brought out the blue in his eyes and the large Bouquet or roses covered nearly half his torso.

“I wasn’t sure if you were a flowers kind of girl” he handed them to you and put his hand behind his neck. Was the winter soldier nervous about tonight?

‘I love them Buck they’re beautiful’ you trimmed the ends and placed them in a vase leaving one out which you stuck in your hair. You turned to find him staring.

“So are you Doll”

Heat rushed to your cheeks ‘we should probably get going we don’t want to be late for our first date’

Bucky laughed “first date? Are you implying that there will be a second one?”

Looking him up and down you responded ‘ I suppose that depends on how tonight goes soldier’

You fixed his tie as the two of you left.

Dinner went by quickly conversation carrying the night and filling it with laughter. Bucky payed saying something about chivalry not being dead and the two of you decided to walk around Central Park not wanting the night to end.

Somehow you two managed to find the only remaining ice cream stand and bought 2 cones. Giggling like little kids as you walked around under the stars.

Finally stopping on a bridge looking at the reflection of the moon over the small pond. You couldn’t help but lean your head on his shoulder.

“Why didn’t we do this sooner Y/N/N” Bucky asked quietly almost as if he thought if he spoke too loud the moment would end.

‘Well because I didn’t know what you’d say if I asked’

Bucky chuckled “that was my reason”

You smiled as you looked up at the sky. The smile faded as the moon covered in dark clouds.

‘Hey Buck?”

Bucky mused “yeah doll”

‘Did you check the weather at all today’

He looked at you “no why?”

Before he finished lightning cracked and the sky broke open. The rain poured down.

You both groaned and cursed the god of thunder who was probably laughing to himself at the compound.

Bucky grabbed your hand “if we run we can make it to the car before we get to wet”

You looked at him wide eyed and then at your heels, maybe Natasha could run in them but you certainly couldn’t.

Bucky followed your gaze and then a wicked grin spread across his face. He scooped you up as if you weighed nothing, your arms wrapping around his neck.

“Ready doll?”

‘Ready as I’ll ever be’ you laughed and with that buck was running to the car, the both of you laughing like idiots.

A smile came to your face once again, you couldn’t have asked for a better way to spend a first date. You silently thanked Thor, changing your mind about the storm and hugged Bucky. Yeah, it was a really good first date.

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Your style of description is a true delight to read, thank you for blessing us with all the yiga content,

How about some Sooga body worshipping his master?~

Thank you! And yes you can! (also you can totally send in ANY botw/aoc content, not just the husbands! People just seem to like them the most)

Kohga groaned as he slowly woke up. He slept pretty damn hard last night, and for a second, he had no idea where he even was. Right, they switched it up, and they had done some hanky panky in Sooga’s room. It was smaller than his own, but in a way, it was comfy. Though, Sooga kept it way too clean for his liking. It was so stiff and neat. Though, it suited the guy in question, he supposed. He was about to pick up his clothes from the floor, before the door to the room opened. Sooga. He was always a morning riser.

“Ah, you’re awake. I brought you breakfast.”

“Surprised you can walk, given last night.”

Kohga chuckled to himself. He was a real beast in the sack (not that it was any surprise to anyone). Sooga nodded, before bringing the tray to Master Kohga. A freshly made honey crepe, served with fried bananas, one hard boiled egg, and a piece of salt grilled meat (specifically red tusked boar. Kohga can tell the difference). Topped with a nice noble pursuit, Kohga was in breakfast in bed heaven. Kohga helped himself to the crepe first, and upon tasting it, he knew something was up.

“This is...good. Really good.”

“As it should be.”

Sooga seemed curious by his glare, and he apparently needed it to be explained to him.

“You suck at making crepes. You didn’t make this.”

“I...did not. I tried, but I burnt it.”

He was hopeless. An absolute himbo of a boyfriend. And did Kohga fucking love him. Kohga rolled his eyes, before continuing to tuck in.

“Next time, give it to me anyway.”

“Don’t...you want good food?”

Sooga asked, sitting right by Kohga’s side, ready to do whatever he wanted at any given second, like usual. Kohga tucked into the bananas, and knew it was the one thing Sooga made (he always added a bit too much sugar cane. Just a little).

“I want food YOU made me. Even if it kills me. I mean don’t TRY to kill me, but you get the idea. You’re my boyfriend, it’s just a thing we do for each other. Besides, it’ll help you be a better cook.”

Sooga seemed puzzled, before he softly chuckled.

“I...understand. I will make a note to try to perfect my skills. You deserve nothing less than perfect.”

“True. But we can’t all be perfect. You’re hot, you’re sweet, you can fight, that’s a pretty big deal.”

Kohga kept eating, before he caught Sooga smiling at him. He was sitting there like an idiot, swooning at him. Kohga stuffed his mouth full of the salted meat, eating it alongside the hard boiled egg. He swallowed, putting the remainder of his food down.

“What are you starin’ at?”

“I just...really think you’re perfect. I’m sorry, is me watching you eat disrupting you?”

Kohga motioned for him to take the tray, and Sooga obeyed, just putting it out of reach. Minus his drink of course. Kohga shook his head.

“No no no, I love the attention. But I’m just saying, you look like you wanna say something.”

Sooga hesitated, before Kohga prompted him with his hand. Sooga took his free hand, and massaged it carefully in his own hand.

“It’s just...seeing you in my bed feels like a dream. I’ve had men in my bed before, but no one I was in love with. No one like you. No one who is so perfect.”

“Go on.”

Kohga chuckled. He sensed some praise kink coming on, and who was he to tell his man no? He took a sip of his drink (he could tell Sooga didn’t make this one, this was actually kinda strong, Sooga always made shit light), and let Sooga do his thing. He pushed his mask back, just a bit, kissing the back of his hand.

“I Love everything about you. I love how soft your hands are. I love watching them when you fight. They’re so nimble, so skilled, I’m envious of them.”

Kohga chuckled, taking another sip of his drink. This was the life. A big, lovesick man, a drink in his hand, and a belly full of food, all without leaving his bed. Sooga kissed the back of his hand, each and every single finger, and his palm. This was the first time he kissed his bare hand, rather than through his uniform, so he was a BIT more eager than usual.

“Go on, what else?”

“I love your belly. I love how big and beautiful it is. I love how soft it feels. I love how it makes you look distinguished with it, I love how I ALWAYS want to rest my head upon it.”

Sweet talker, this one was. He even put his hand down in order to crawl into bed, and kiss his bare belly. He could tell Sooga was just a BIT too excited about it, given how plentiful the kisses were on his bare belly, but who was he to stop him? Kohga took another sip, grinning at the lovesick puppy in his arms.

“You hear some of the footsoldiers calling it ‘poochy’?”

“Yes, I’m quite aware, and I find myself accidentally saying it sometimes.”

Kohga snickered. It was a stupid thing that got started a while ago, and he personally didn’t mind it. 

“So you like my ‘poochy tummy’?”

Sooga looked up at him with an almost exhausted expression, before nodding.

“Yes, I like your ‘poochy tummy’. And your ability to make me say something ridiculous, just for the sake of your amusement.”

Kohga took another swig, trying not to grin.

“Uh huh. What else do you like about me?”

He gave his stomach one more kiss, before he lifted himself up, and started to play with Kohga’s messy, curly hair.

“I love your hair. So soft and beautiful, so soft and wonderful. I could play with it for hours, days even. It always smells like mighty thistles, and I love how only I’ve seen it down like this. I love when you let me watch you put it up. It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful.”

Kohga grinned, giving him a moment to play with his hair. He knew it was pretty, and knew HE was pretty. He let Sooga have his moment to worship him, before he gestured him to on.

“Go on, something else.”

“I love your lips. I love how they’re more beautiful than any flower in any part of Hyrule. I love how they’re softer than rito feathers.”

Sooga pressed his lips against his. Once, twice, thrice. After a while Kohga lost count. Big, handsome man ravishing him like that? Oof, it killed him. Kohga parted after a moment, clearly satisfied by Sooga’s worship. He was giving him such loving, such bedroom eyes.

“Hmmm...you DO like my lips…~”

“I like many other things about you, Master Kohga.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

Sooga pulled away the sheet, making Kohga totally nude again.

“I could tell you...Or I could show you.”

Kohga didn't have time to respond before Sooga nearly pounced on him, making Kohga drop his drink.

“Sooga! You dropped my drink!”

“Fix it later.”

He mumbled, nearly pinning Kohga down by his weight, and showering his neck in kisses.

“Soooooga!!”

Kohga would allow a spilled drink. Just once. He was lucky he was so goddamn cute.

[belphegorswhore]

Wowie, that message at the bottom of your last post was strangely aggressive. Okay, here’s an ask for your inbox: the brothers (and the other guys if you want to) react to a dumb MC. Like, someone who’s very pretty and cute, but you could swear that their looks are the only thing they have going for them. Their bad at school, ask dumb questions and are a total air head. Mega bimbo/himbo energy

See, now this is the content we want ;)

Obey Me! Characters react to himbo/bimbo/thembo MC

Lucifer:

Listen, we all know idiots are his type, I mean... he likes Diavolo... the #1 himbo

He’d have to sit and sigh anytime you say anything dumb, and he’d be like

“Why do I like them...?”

I think what really gets him is your clueless smile, I dunno I get vibes

It’s very charming to him, but he’s very upset that your failing school

Low-key ruining his reputation, he would not hold hands with you in public

It’s ok, he still loves you..

He would totally show you off at a dance because of your looks, but he would not allow you to talk

“You’re going to shake their hand and that’s it, do not speak”

Unlike the rest of his brothers, he wouldn’t trick you into doing dumb shit

Mammon:

“Damn, I guess I’ll have to take care of you”

He’d like to think that he’s the smarter and stronger one, so he has to take care of you

But he’s actually equally as stupid, so you guys would get in trouble a lot

“Hey, MC, you wanna ditch class?”

“Not really”

“But what if I said... you do it anyways..”

“Ok”

Would absolutely trick you into doing dumb stuff

But because of this, he’d make you take the blame if he did anything wrong

It’s not like anyone would believe him, but still

Oh, and what’s that...? Modeling???

Obviously you’d model with him now, he’d have a heart attack looking at you in some outfits though

Leviathan:

Oh no

“M-MC... you must hate looking at a-an otaku like me... I’m so disgusting...”

“What’s that mean..? Is that like the Naruti thing??”

“Wh- No!”

“Isn’t that like 12 episodes long, with Chris Evans or something”

“Stop!”

He was worried that you’d think he’s dumb, but now he’s getting a headache listening to you

You’d be easily impressed by his gameplay

“Wow, Levi, you’re so good at this game!”

“I-I’m playing a dating si- Actually, that would be correct I’m amazing at this game”

He would absolutely convince you to do Ruri-Chan cosplay

He’d regret it after because he’d have a stroke

Satan:

He’d think it’s very cute, but he’d constantly worry about you

He’s mostly worried about other people flirting with you at school

If he saw people flirting with you, he’d probably wall slam you in front of them and they’d go away

Like, that mans one of the seven lords or smth, they’re worried for their life

“See what happens when you stand there like a space cadet *sigh* at least be more alert when you’re by yourself or it’s gonna be your own damn fault when you get kidnapped”

“You’re right!”

“I said when you’re alone... you don’t have to worry about it when you’re with me, you can space out as much as you want”

“R-Right!”

“And I didn’t mean anything funny by that either! S-So don’t get the wrong idea!”

Did so just quote Fruits Basket? Yeah, but diD I ASK???

He’d feel bad about it, but he would totally get you to meow

He was joking at first, but now he does it all the time

He also gets you to help him prank Lucifer

Asmodeus:

At first he’d think your so pransome and that he’d have to work so hard to get you, then he’d find out you’re low key stupid and he’d be like

“This is gonna be so easy... but at what cost”

He’d truly try his best not to take advantage of you, so he’d just dress you up and do your make up a lot

Would definitely put you in sexy nice outfits and take pictures, but he’d keep them for himself

He’d also like to try a lot of his products on you, but still trick you

“MC, did you know this moisturizer is made from pure angel tears?”

“Whoa, no wonder my skin is so clear..- Wait, that’s so sad, are they okay!?”

He’d also lie to you about other stuff, just to see how you’d react

He’d literally tell you that Lucifer dyed his hair and that it used to be white, so the next time you interact with Lucifer it’d be like:

“Lucifer, I know you’re secret..”

“*glares* Which one..!?”

“*on the verge of crying* Wh-White hair.....!”

Lucifer would sigh and have to tell Asmo to stop tricking you

Beelzebub:

Oh no... 2 dumbasses

He didn’t even notice you were dumb, and he’s too shy to comment about your looks

He’d probably think you’re smart

“MC, what’s the answer to this question..?”

“The square root... of 68... Um... probably a carrot, that’s a root I think”

“Yeah, I like carrots so it’s probably right”

Mammon would definitely be mad that Beel calls him dumb but you smart

“Wow MC, you’re pretty and smart...”

You guys being together would be like the attractive one and the jock, iconic

But, or course, neither of you realize this

If you guys were cooking together and Beel ate the food it would go like:

“MC... where’d the food go?”

“...I don’t know, it was here a second ago”

Or like:

“It says ‘tsp’ of baking soda... what do you think that is, Beel?”

“I forgot... let’s just add a cup”

“Yeah, that’s probably safe”

You two would make Luke cry

Belphegor:

Honestly gave it his all at first, but now he’s tired

“MC... you wanna sleep together?”

“Oh, like a pillow fort!? I’ve always wanted to have a pillow fort with you, this is great!”

“Wh- No- Sure, yeah”

He’d be really happy when you wear his clothes though, especially his sweaters

And, just like Satan, he’d get you to prank Lucifer with him

“Ok, so you’re going to talk to him while I put a whoopie cushion on his chair, he’s dumb so he’ll fall for it”

And when your distracting Lucifer you’d end up saying something like

“Lucifer, are you dumb?”

“Wh- No.”

“Okay, I thought you were dumb”

And before you could finish the prank, Lucifer would storm out he room because you thought he was dumb

Belphegor would be disappointed and you’d be confused

“What did I do wrong..?”

“Nothing, you did great. In the end Lucifer got mad and that was the goal”

While he does think you’re attractive, this asshole would love tricking you for his enjoyment

Diavolo:

The #1 himbo

Everyone else would be like ‘Wow, this human is so beautiful and they got with the prince of Devildom! That’s amazing!”

But really he was nice to you once and you were like ‘wow... him’

“MC... you are very... delightful... to view”

“He’s so good with his words <3”

He does think youre attractive though, and just like Lucifer, he’d want to show you off (but in a more fun way)

He’d literally carry you to class, both to show you off and probably because you want to be carried

You could be in the middle of a meeting and sitting on his lap and he wouldn’t mind

Everyone else would though

Since you’re bad at school he would try to help you, but it’s very difficult

“Okay, so this war happened 4000 years ago-“

“When?”

“...4000 years ago”

Solomon:

Y’all thought Asmo was flirting too much?? Nah, he stopped after he got what he wanted, Solomon would keep going

“Wow you’re dumb, I like that in a person”

“I’m not dumb...”

“But, it’s in a cute way”

“Wow, he called me cute”

Once he gets closer to you... he messes with you even more

“Hey MC, there’s a stain on your shirt”

“Really, where- *gets flicked*”

This asshole would not stop messing with you

He’d even mess with you just to mess with the brothers

(In front of any of the brothers) “Hey, MC, I dropped that, can you pick it up for me?”

“I just saw you drop-“

“It slipped out of my hand..”

“Oh ok.”

“*whispers* haha.. nice ass”

Simeon:

He thinks it’s cute, even if you’re failing everything

“It’s fine.. it’s cute :)”

But you guys are also both dumb, and technologically challenged

Texting each other would go like:

“Wha TSS jup”

“Nowtwhisng”

“Met oo :))”

He would probably compliment you a lot, doesn’t matter if you can’t handle it, he’ll keep going

“You’re so pretty and cute, has anyone ever told you that?”

“Yeah, you said that earlier today”

“I can’t even look at you because you’re so bright ;)”

“I’m, like, normal light though...”

“*sighs* it’s okay, it’s cute”

If anyone else called you dumb though... I dunno... might just... glare at them

He wouldn’t fight anyone though, he’s a man of GOD unless...

Barbatos:

He likes it, but he hates it. It’s cute sometimes, but he gets a headache other times

“If... theoretically, I jumped off the roof-“

“Please don’t.”

“No no, theoretically, you could time travel into the past and catch me...”

“Actually, it would have to be the future, and I wouldn’t do that. Please don’t :)”

He’d also help you with school, but sometimes he’d be tired of you not understanding and would do the homework for you

He thought it was a lot of work to handle Diavolo, but you surpassed his expectations

You’re lucky he likes you, I guess...

“Barbatos... why are you staring at me like that..?”

“No reason”

“...Do I look weird, is there something on my face??”

“No, you look nice today”

“Wow, you’re such a great friend :)”

“.... :)”

It’s okay, he thinks your stupidity is barely charming

Luke:

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from these horrible demons!!”

He would worry a lot about your safety because he’d think you’re too dumb to realize when someone’s after you

“Didn’t you realize he was flirting with you!? Disgusting!”

“But he was being nice to me”

“That’s what demons do to get what they want”

“What do they want?”

“Uh.. um... I don’t know- But I’m sure it’s bad!”

Simeon would try to reassure Luke, but it wouldn’t work

“Luke, it’s fine. They’re all just complimenting them because they’re really pretty-“

“No, you too!? Simeon, I thought I could trust you!!”

One day if he’s trying to defend you, he’d probably end up threatening Lucifer

“....pardon?”

“I-I said I’ll fight you if you k-keep doing that...!”

And then Lucifer would scare him with no hesitation because he feels no remorse for him

I added everyone cuz no one but God can stop me. this took way too long, I’m sorry

[cheseyre]

good news, sluts! my brain's no longer being completely stupid (only mostly), i've seen the new asides and...have some thought-y thot thoughts:

*deep inhale*

Okay, first things first: this art style is soooo fucking cUTE and I'm a jealous, squealing bitch. Anyone who knows who the artist is, could you link me to them, stat? I think Thomas mentioned them at the beginning of the ep, but nYeh, brain hurt, doesn't wanna do wooork-

Okay, I'll admit, I was a little...apprehensive when I first saw the thumbnail and title. Part of it's just me being a bitter Remus Stan, but also...okay, deep breaths, controversial opinion time, get ready:

I don't ship Prinxiety.

Like, at all. 

I can see the appeal, and these dorks were so very, VERY cute in this particular ep, but I was honestly turned off by the ship long ago due to how overwhelmingly popular it is and how some fans characterize these two and treat this relationship as if it's the only valid one, y'know, the works—slight tangent, but that's also why I don't ship Logicality or Remile. I honestly vibe much better with ships like Roceit or Analogical, y'know?

Cutting in for another brief tangent: I'm surprisingly okay with Demus/Dukeceit/Receit/Trashnoodle/Whatever-Their-Ship-Name-Is-Oh-God-Why-Do-They-Have-So-Many-Fucking-Names; maybe it's cause they haven't actually interacted in canon and the fan content gives me such good Gay Disney Villain content, idk man im weird—).

Still, their interactions were both hilarious and sweet and like I said, I see the appeal, it's just not my cup of tea. y'all Prinxiety fans got fucking FED and I'm happy for you nerds. Enjoy ze happy boys!

I guess another factor in my...low-key hesitance when I first saw what the ep was about is that...okay, get ready, another controversial opinion, le gasp: well, I'm not a big Virgil fan. In fact, at times, he swaps places with Patton as my least favorite sides—especially with some of his recent behavior in eps like DWIT (the "prohibit your breathing comment" really triggered me, for example). Sometimes, his attitude, especially around other sides like Roman or Janus, reminds me a little too much of my sister, who I don't have...a very good relationship with. Add to that how the more...intense side of the fandom has a disturbing tendency to turn him into the 'uwu precious woobie emo baby who can do no wrong' while unnecessarily villainizing other CERTAIN sides in the process, and...I think you all see where I'm going with this little rant 😅

However, upon actually watching the ep, he wasn't...that bad? I don't think? I enjoyed watching him be a flustered, disaster-y mess and genuinely excited at the end, his interactions with Roman were nice enough, and him literally pushing Thomas to make a move with Nico despite his obvious panic attack was a nice moment of genuine character development. I like seeing that, that's the good shit right there. And him being all flustered and shit, and smiling so much at the end of the vid was just...well, adorable. This man has no fucking right to be this cute, my god

alsoooo 

pURPLE EYESHADOW

PURPLE EYESHADOW HE LOOKS?? SO GOOD?? WTF?? SLAY EMO, SLAAAAAAAY FUCK, DOES THIS MEAN I HAVE TO CHANGE MY HALLOWEEN COSTUME NOW?

alsoooo 

hAPPY ROMAN

YESSSSS~ MAH BOI MAH SON MAH DUMB BITCH HIMBO PRINCE MAH EXTRA MESSY CINNAMON ROLL

ITS  BEEN SO  LONG

AND HIS LITTLE HEART EYES THROUGHOUT THE VID, OH MY GOD-

IMMA JUST IGNORE THAT "ADDING [MISTAKE] TO THE LIST" COMMENT I AM LOOKING AWAY I DO NOT SEE IT LALALALALA

THOMATHY, SIR, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT MAKING THESE TWO GAY IDIOTS SO BAEBY

Okay, but Virgil not realizing that "cyberstalking in real life" is literally just stalking is both a big ass mood and further proof that, yes, Logan is indeed the only one holding the braincell out of this disaster of a lot. God help them all if he ducks out in the next ep.

👀

And Thomas x Trash Can is my new OTP.  I dub thee ✨ "Trashmas" ✨

we sTAN TRASHMAS

Wait, does that mean Remus actually WAS in the ep? Cause, y'know, trash man?

hmmm

👀 👀 

Okay, okay. 

With how much Virgil and Roman were going off about Thomas constantly lying, I was (understandably) a tad bit disappointed my snek son didn't even make a fucking cameo, but y'know what? In hindsight, I'm okay with this it's fineee~

He was just off playing with shadow puppets and stealing money from us desperate, content-starved peasants with his sheer extra-ness and, honestly? Gotta respect the hustle. 

Get that precious, precious coin, dapper snake! Wring us poor losers dryyyy!

*evil snek laugh*

Also, this is a breather ep and adding Janus in probably would've caused unnecessary drama with the Roceit breakup and the constant antagonism between Virgil and him. It probably would've distracted from the point of the ep (flirting with social anxiety, exactly what it says in the tin)—much like it wasn't really Virgil or Remus's place to show up during POF. Does that make sense? I think it makes sense. Sorry, brain going brr-

Still, I can't believe the "Fuck Janus Sanders" Club is actually canon now 😂

God, first Patton in a skirt and now this. 

Thomas Sanders, you delight in fucking feEDING this gremlin nest of a fanbase, don’t you? You RELISH our screams of joy and pain and suffering, dON’T YOU?

What's next, actual canonical Janus and Remus interaction? Patton saying the fuck word? The Dragon Witch comes back? Janus's bowler hat gains sentience and takes over the world, Doris-style? What do you have planned, Thomas? Joan? WHAT ART THOU PLANNING, I MUST KNOW YOU HEATHENS YOU FIENDS-

And Virgil's little "would it be fair to him" comment, tho.

👀

Like, I get in the context of the ep, he was likely talking about Nico and how it wouldn’t be good for a potential relationship with Tomas to be founded on lies, but still...my anxceit heart aches, man. 

Gimme that sweet, sweet angst with a side of mutual regret and possible future reconciliation and maybe something more wink wink nudge nudge on top, pls

...and fries.

Honestly, tho, that entire bathroom monologue was fucking beautiful, man. And relatable, too—i can't tell you how many times I've talked to myself in public restrooms because I just didn't know how to get the words I wanted to say out. It's...kind of embarrassing, tbh

Speaking of embarrassing, uh, crying stall guy.

Just...

Crying Stall Guy

Like, I was expecting someone to come out the bathroom stall after Thomas stopped talking, but...I honestly wasn't expecting that. God, that whole scene was so cringe worthy and fucking hilarious

Honestly, Thomas in the ep in general was a huge ass mOOD and we collective gay/bi disasters ALL related with him, and if you say you don't, you're either lying to yourself or a demon. 

There is no in between 

sorry I don't make the rules

Like, I get this series is literally a gay disaster talking to himself for thirty minutes or longer, but like- EMPHASIS on the 'disaster' part 😂

Like...Thomas, you're lucky you're such a goddamn bean, because GOD, I cringing so hard when he first started talking to Nico

Although, I too have apologized profusely for genuine mistakes and am a flustered bi mess around my crush sooo

😅

And god, Roman's "thirty = old man" jokes made me feel old...and I literally just turned twenty, like, come on, man!

Maybe that's because I was literally watching this ep after finishing my ACT and had been sitting with a bunch of high schoolers, with their tiny fucking desks and tiny fucking water fountains smeh

*clears throat*

Anyways, uh, we STAN Nico Pintrovert Florés in this house

Like

He gives me such big Carlos from WTNV vibes for some reason and this makes me sooo happy

and YESS, he's a WRITER

And he's??? So sweet?? A pure bean?? Just sits on his laptop at the mall food court all day, like a god-fucking iCON?? A Nightmare Before Christmas fan?? weARS GLASSES??

my hEART

*cries*

The fandom seems torn between "Nicomas" and "Karrot Kings" as a ship name atm—personally speaking, I'm casting my vote for the latter

*crosses fingers* please dont be another janus x remus multiple ship name issue guys, please please please I can't keep track of them all-

*clears throat*

On that note, I'm guess I'm gonna go try and whoo over my crush with carrots now. If THIS disaster can do it and make it actually fucking work, god damnit, so cAN I

Meanwhile, in hell, my brain's just screaming "CANON LOVE INTEREST CANON LOVE INTEREST CANON LOVE INTEREST-"

God, I hope Nico isn't just a one-shot character, he's too pure and Thomas and him are adorable gay Disney fans and I stan

Oh, I wonder how the other sides'll react to him.

Wait.

Oh god.

Oh god.

This ep just unleashed a new fresh hell of potential Nico x Sides ships, hasn't it?

Welp, time to prepare for ze incoming flood of fanfics, I guess. I'll get my umbrella and rain boots.

That last shot of Virgil during the endcard was so fucking ominous oh my god mom im scared can you come pick me up-

Goddammit, Thomas and Joan, I'm NOT fucking ready to be traumatized again, fUCK

I wish I wasn't a broke ass university student so I could contribute to Thomas's gloriously extra Patreon—both so I can support my favorite content creators who make this amazing blessed content and also, to join my boi Janus in fucking  destroying society by giving money to the people who actually deserve it, fuck YOU GOVERNMENT-

Okay. 

Okay. 

New headcanon time as to why Patton, Remus, and Logan weren't in the ep: they were helping Jan film that Patreon promotional video. 

Like

Remus directed it, Logan helped with the lighting and script, and Patton was just there as the cheerleader. 

The reason Janus made a dog with shadow puppets wasn't just to flaunt his deity status and prove how he is truly above us mere wretched mortals 

despite that being the absolute truth and we all know it, don't lie to yourselves

No, it was really him trying to do something cute and silly for Patton, because Moceit rights, daMMIT

*inhales*

noww 

guys, gals, and nonbinary pals

it’s time forr

the most wonderful time of the yearrr

WAITING FOR THE NEXT EPISODE

Step right up, folks! Hear ye, hear ye, my prediction for the next episode: Prinxiety v. Moceit! With special guest stars: Karrot Kings vibing in adorable gay and Intrulogical, bitter at being excluded aGAIN

Who will win? Who will lose? 

here’s a hint: we all will because in this sick twisted game they are no winners only losers-

Place your bets, folks! ✨

Haha im not readyyy~

tl;dr

this episode has cleared my skin, watered my crops, and ended my suffering—an adorable calm before the... angsty fucking shitstorm that’s coming far too soon. Prinxiety stans, enjoy your food. Place an 'F' in the chat for me and my fellow grieving Remus stans. Trashmas is the true OTP, but Karrot Kings is cute too I guess. I've only had Nico Florés for 24 minutes, but if anything happens to him, I'll kill everyone in this room and then myself. Purple eyeshadow Virgil makes me question my sexuality aGAIN, and happy gay disney prince rights y'all. Say a big ole 'fuck you' to capitalism by giving your local dapper snake moneys. Concussion makes brain go brr and imma go buy some carrots and be gay now.

psst hey @quarantinevibes2020​ you wanna join me in being disaster-y? i’ll bring my best gay stare and you bring the wine

Until next time, my lovelies! ~ Ches 🖤

[kinkymagnus]

Idk if you’ve talked about this before but?? How do you imagine twi!Malec’s first “i love you”s to go? I kinda feel like, while canon Malec had this big revelation because it was life or death, twi!Malec would have a more… quiet moment of it?? No less huge to either of them but just, less the result of being constantly under threat u kno skdhakdh it’s a scenario I love to think about. Like, how long have they been dating, does Alec Know yet, what lead up to the moment, where are they (does it end with Alec ravishing Magnus yes it does) etc etc etc it’s fun to think about 😌

i don't think i HAVE talked about this actually!!

honestly im not sure, like, you're right in the sense this is not going to be a "right after i thought you got murdered in the Mass Slaughter i hugged you and declared my love for you" revelation, and i like the idea that it's just quiet and a normal moment, like obviously it's still momentous for them personally but like.... god just like.... they're lying in bed and alec just looks down at magnus, lying there with the sunlight streaming in over him, golden eyes looking up at him with such fondness, and he just can't help but breathe out i love you

and then hes like wait (registering what he just said) and magnus is like ??!!!! and alec refuses to backtrack but he is a little panik bc he DID just confess love to his boyf--and then magnus says (quiet but sincere and with such awe and almost like he can't believe how lucky he is) i love you, too.

like it just being this.... not really a Huge Special Revelation, just a quiet morning in, just them being intimate and soft and alec just looking down at him and thinking i love you so much and he, being a himbo with no filter when it comes to magnus and compliments, just blurts that out...............Sweet

and then, ofc, alec ravishes him. like just. they're both beaming at each other like idiots and alec kisses him and it just kinda escalates from there. cue lovemaking with lots of i love yous and soft kisses....

i think it would likely be post reveal, and honestly i'm not going to even bother with a timeline because im bad at them and the canon one sucks anyway so i can't go off that. but i do think they've been dating for a while (but maybe a little shorter than an i love you would normally come, because these bitches fall fast and hard) and alec has known for a while.

personally i also like the theory that like. twi magnus is not very subtle with his magic, so alec kinda.... figures out something's up almost right away. but he just rolls with it. like, canon magnus lost control of his magic bc alec kissed him and was taking his clothes off, you think twi magnus who has only just gotten his magic back after who knows how long being totally dormant, who's just coming out of his box on multiple levels and letting the world have color again, you think that magnus has got a tight control on his magic?

i like to think it's just like. overly responsive and instinctual now, with much less tight control, so like, he's thinking about how he wants to read a book and it flies into his hands, or he's absent-mindedly humming and his pens are floating and dancing on the desk, or alec kisses him and the lights flicker or a lamp begins to float. naturally, alec notices when the candles light themselves and things float into magnus's hands while he's not paying attention, and is kinda like. huh. i guess my boyfriend has superpowers. neat

and then when magnus, scared but determined, shakily confesses everything to him one night, alec's just like. [tenderly cupping his face and/or taking his hands] magnus, sweetheart, i am so so honored that you trust me with this and i need you to know that it changes nothing about how i feel for you, and that i'm not leaving you. but also. sweetheart, darling, dearest. did you really think i didn't notice that the houseplants water themselves and you make things float and remember the first time we had sex and there was a spontaneous thunderstorm outside and your beautiful golden cat eyes were out? sweetheart,

(magnus, choked up and half between panic/disbelief and just like so much relief/love: b-beautiful?)

on the other hand, despite my love of both of these being more quiet small moments rather than dramatic revelations, i DO ALSO like dramatic reveal/dramatic love confession, like. alec walking in on magnus doing something blatantly super magical after a long series of shenanigans designed to hide his magic (they presumably haven't had sex yet bc that shit would be way too obvious) and magnus is like "I CAN EXPLAIN"

or like. drama vague angst misunderstandings they have an argument of some sort and one of blurts it out, etc. like i do LIKE the dramatic reveals/confessions but i dont know how it would go because nothing seems to quite live up to the hype if that makes sense? that i can come up with anyway.

either way........................twi malec saying i love you for the first time 🥺

i just love like. specifically twi malec like. twi magnus, who's spent so long making himself small and invisible to stay safe, who's been isolated and lonely, who's now much more shy and hesitant and scared of letting people in and being vulnerable, and twi alec, confident and loud and open and shamelessly head over heels for magnus immediately. like he really took one look at twi magnus, short neat hair and much plainer than we're used to and just. him being cute af. and went "is anyone going to love this man" and didn't wait for an answer. actually what's funnier is before he actually knew magnus he was 100 percent just like oh im going to eat him ALIVE like he literally is just like. oh he looks kinda shy but sexy, i'm gonna fuck him so good, i cannot WAIT to get this quiet pretty man to scream and beg :) im gonna give him such a good time

and it's like that dynamic they start with, with magnus just beginning to come out of his shell and heal for unrelated reasons and then alec just.... helping? with that? he's so open and confident but like. he's also soft and understanding and gentle, he doesn't push magnus too hard but he does help coax him out of his shell, does slip through those emotional walls and just. help him heal, help him feel safe and confident in himself again, help him dress how he wants again, help him be open and enjoy sex and relationships again, etc. obviously he's not completely dependent on alec, but alec came at such a good time and he's just like. exactly what magnus needs in a relationship, you know? and vice versa, too, like maybe magnus helps alec give himself more private space, let himself take breaks and just relax more, as well as be vulnerable and not just the cool party boy all the time. they really help each other out, it's a great balance and they're so supportive and good for each other

[theskyexists]

she-ra 4

the reason i stopped watching she-ra is the same reason i stopped watching the dragon prince.

the narrative doesn’t take the situation seriously. instead of leaning into the anguish of war and violence (atla, teen titans) - they make light of it. EVEN when the characters’ guardians are KILLED!!

when Angella died and they spent 2 seconds on Glimmer’s grief at the end of season 3 i was like......actually fuck this. HOW can i take any of these stakes seriously when they insist on brushing them off???

anyway just had to complain about that - especially because the start of the first ep of 4 is them joking AGAIN about something as grim as Glimmer now carrying all the responsibilities of her mother - who may i remind you IS DEAD

but catradora became canon apparently so now i have to struggle through

her aunt, her mother’s sister, is fuckin, joking about cakes, her friends are laughing at the joke. COME ON! how goddamn unrealistic and insensitive. EVEN if they wanna make a point of it - it’s silly! because the narrative PARTICIPATES in making light of the situation. if it was just the characters it would be less jarring

‘we’ll make sure this day is perfect’  WHAT? how could it EVER BE IF HER MOTHER IS FUCKING DEAD????????? AND THAT”S THE ONLY REASON SHE’S QUEEN????? ‘must be hard’ YEAH IT’S HARD - IN FACT IMPOSSIBLE. instead of pretending to be happy maybe you can show some genuine sensitivity. these people are so crazily emotionally underdeveloped my god. what age are they supposed to be? 16? 17? The problem that She-ra has (just like the dragon prince) is that there are no relevant adults. Oh sure there’s a Queen, and some Soldiers, and a Sorceress. But there isn’t a single relevant competent adult around who is concerned with running a bureaucracy or the emotional stability of children

I do like how Catra has overcome her fear of Hordak. but i think i remember being fuckin furious at her for almost destroying the whole world and hurting Scorpia and betraying Entrapta just to spite Adora. vaguely.

the rebellions problem is that they’re all extremely stupid himbos. like literally, in the whole story, only catra and shadowweaver have any smarts, while glimmer gains the ability to think during full moons on wednesdays. meanwhile everybodys is a slave to their emotions - which destroys any brain cells that shadowweaver or catra (or angella or anyone) might have managed. they could literally have killed hordak the entire time but just let him order them around because they’re so hot for acknowledgement

I’m glad Glimmer reflects my frustrations now hahahahaah

‘everyone is already acting like she doesn’t matter’  - yeah dudes, you fucking insensitive bastards

‘im supposed to take care of you glimmer’ - but unfortunately i have the emotional intelligence of a crab! FUCK!

this is another thing about this show that makes me groan. sappy quick resolutions of emotional turmoil through re-affirming the fuckin power of friendship in the first episode of the season.

also couldn’t Adora have done this she-ra stuff from the very beginning

that was badass.....miss glimmer’s other hair though. ok the emotions at that hologram and statue though...

the coolest part of she-ra for me is finding out more how the ancient systems all fit into Etheria and the She-Ras and Hordak Prime etc.

THIS IS A GOOD SPEECH. love this badass.

love Hordak getting put in his place. Love Catra realising she has power - love Hordak reaping what he sows. its unfortunate that she’s a shitty brat who JUST can’t get over her inferiority complex

if i could endlessly teleport i would do what glimmer does

also, glimmer was willing to fuckin murder catra before and she DEFINITELY will be now lol. love that for her.

why did they only introduce adora learning to transform her sword NOW ahahaha, theyve had SO MANY SCENES in which she doesnt have it and then suddenly does - and then its gone again

scorpia is the funniest and most likeable person in the whole show

they really suddenly can’t take five people on with she ra and fuckin huntara on their side??

i remember that little sadistic righteous twist in my stomach when Adora finally was like: FUCK!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! Catra!!!!!!! and the stupid idiot got it

FINALLY A GLANCE AT THE PEOPLE OF ETHERIA AGAIN! i love the party sequences in this!!! the people of etheria are so beautiful! nobody ever comments on the main characters all looking plain human in contrast....

‘and i fell for it!’  yeah cos you DUMB AS BRICKS ADORA

so first they quietly take out the guards....and then literally break open the door hahaahahahahaaha

‘we forgot the bots regenerate’ - yeah cos you DUMB AS BRICKS ADORA

i just dont understand why they insist on making the main characters so DUMB ahahahahaah

Adora and Catra are great at hitting where it hurts. the difference between them is that Catra KNOWS that she’s hurting Adora - she does it deliberately.

wow that could be some pretty angsty stuff constantly leaving her to struggle on the floor while painfully electrocuted. Catra has also moved to kill Adora straight up so many times. im sure she really wants to (but it would destroy her later). But now, Adora swept something at Catra that might have actually killed her. I get Catra though, I would’t want to get beaten by some blonde, blue-eyed, glowing golden kid who always gets to win and do better. this is truly the first time Adora has moved to kill Catra......

does flatterina not have parents who’d be like: uhhhhh maybe leave the soldiering for a couple more years?

catra truly burning all her bridges. hahaha. it’s so satisfying to see her use her anger and power to truly destroy herself - because of guilt!

no other villagers were like - HMMMMMMM this random new kid is here? weird..... i didnt see that coming either.

Adora doesn’t think about what Catra might have even been doing there - cos she’s DUMB AS BRICKS

the interesting thing about this show is that they’re setting up a dichotomy. they’re treating war like a high-stakes game because they have the good side adhere to an aesthetic of ....magic. they will not make the two sides equivalent in any way - which makes questions of morality moot. the show is purely an emotional drama. the horde is an army of brainwashed kids in an industrial wasteland - they fight with tech and guns. but the good guys cannot fight with an army or tech, they fight with cleverness and magic. they’re called the ‘rebellion’ - they HAVE to be underdogs because they have to follow the script of good - even though what’s really going on is war, not a rebellion. That’s why they have a single strike team that do ‘missions’. They are presented as FUNDAMENTALLY different - on the level of identity which they cannot change lest they destroy themselves - and in that way the good guys can never become the bad guys. it is ALMOST meta. think they’re gonna do something with that at one point. i hope

also Netossa has such a super cool design.

‘everyone knows you’re needed in bright moon’ - uh. really? i dont know. some random person i’ve never seen before demands you go to meetings. so? is that important? why?

spinerella can literally FLY???????? why has she been in the background this whole time??? hahahaha military inefficiency.

there was an explosion that ripped trees apart - but bo’s alive!! honesty why didn’t they try explosive suicide bots before. they’re very lucky he was still alive to heal

‘could they be tracking she-ra?’ WHAT? isn’t the obvious suggestion - A SPY???? they just assume that the general is right hahahahaa.

i love how double trouble is so meta.

actually, why wasn’t glimmer trained as a sorcerer anyway?

glimmer is upset about her growing magic plants but not her having magic ingredients

why do they present good strategic thinking (for once) as evil influence from shadowweaver

what a fuckin badass. honestly - glad that this show finally utilised glimmer’s extremely op powers like they should be. honestly, she’s much more powerful than She-Ra.

that bit with spinerella was so contrived jfc.

‘by using me as a decoy’ adora says, pissed off. uhhhh YOU went off on your own to get smushed by fuckin bots adora. Glimmer didn’t do that to you. she just used your stupidity.

glimmer really left catra to die. hahahahaa

i like adora best when she’s on her own and being a dork

they definitely managed to foreshadow that Light Hope was evil but im glad they picked up the thread now

am i seeing this wrong or did scorpia have two mums??? but also. where the fuck are they

lolololololol because everybodys dumb as bricks and emotionally volatile they’re incredibly easy to manipulate

‘i cant risk hitting flatterina’ pffft - ALL YOUR ARROWS ARE NON-LETHAL BO. ugh i cant deal with these contrived stakes

I LOVE THIS BADASS EFFICIENT HARDCORE GLIMMER

they’re really gonna spin it like this is a bad development? fuck off. finally some grit.

‘you took things way too far’ - but she got results! dumb as bricks adora

(this may seem harsh but adora is DUMB shes so fucking DUMB!!!! and she has many good qualities (such as an almost innate sense of morality) but goddamn. i guess its good to sometimes have a show about all around dumb characters. i mean, it’s not unrealistic per se, it’s just.....weird.)

the interesting thing about these characters is that you can SEE every single one of them struggling with cognitive dissonance. thats the big story of this show. they see the world a certain way - and then when something challenges that, they fight to the death to destroy or deny or ignore that new information - to everybody’s detriment. and they can’t back down because every step they’ve taken - would turn to sins they can’t live with. it’s interesting and its also a kind of conflict that‘s frustrating if not resolved at SOME point. thats why i love this season for its characters going off the rails. adora aiming to kill catra, catra destroying her last relationships, glimmer growing more and more militant.

they’re all acting like teens - that  is - highly volatile - unable to keep from provoking others or be provoked - but they ARE teens.

‘catra doesn’t care. she’ll hurt people to get her way (implied: EVEN people on her side)’ - we must remember that Scorpia was entirely fine with KILLING the trio (it was Catra that wasn’t at the time).

‘you’re a bad friend’ OH OUCH. Catra - who’s always been treated as a whipping girl by those in power - does the same to those she is in power over. But on some level she doesn’t WANT to be that. she’s just always always been rejected and take advantage of and lashed out at and abandoned by the people she considered important (shadowweaver ---- doing the same to catra that was done to her is so goddamn....it’s the story of this show. the simplicity and banality of damaging and hurting others and that carrying over to harm even more people - is the story of this show and it’s immeasurably frustrating and REALISTIC)

she still flinches at Hordak’s lashing out. but she imprints on him the exact lesson she’s trying to school herself in. If you don’t need anybody - you don’t want anyone - if nobody matters but the mission and winning - then you can’t be hurt. she wants to prove her worth - but she doesn’t realise that inherently means that she’s putting somebody in power over her - again and again and again.

mermista coming  in clutch with the braincells: there’s a spy! I love how this is played as completely implausible and just Mermista nonsense (who i love learning about) - while it’s so obviously true/

i actually love Adora when she’s being serious and heroic, or a huge dork. and she has the wit to RECOGNISE good ideas. but i just don’t understand why Adora is being big b about being used as a distraction. like....why?

i love that the underside of Mermista’s sneaker has a figure. but why the fuck is a common soldier with them (flatterina) and do they really think they can interrogate the whole castle filled with some shitty guards and...what - the guerilla troops they sometimes employ? where do they even live? ah in a tent city. ok

why is the GENERAL in front line combat WITHOUT SOLDIERS???? oh wait. glimmer did that too when she was general. lolololol

i understand why Adora doesn’t trust Shadowweaver and doesn’t want her around most of all - and Glimmer getting buddy buddy with her is hurtful. but...it’s not helpful to needle glimmer about it. but dismissing the guards around shadowweaver however? stupid of Glimmer. unnecessary. ‘what has she done but help us?’ - uhhhh she kidnapped you, corrupted your powers, almost wiped Adora’s mind. I wish Adora had summed up those things instead of leaving them implied.

so perfuma and mermista come across inconsistencies in the stories - but then. forget about it? i just...... UGGHGHGHGHGHGHGH. people really aren’t this dumb are they? they’re just NOT.

‘no more secrets and doing things without us’ - that was a good speech. but like, glimmer is right - she’s surrounded by INCOMPETENT IDIOTS lolololol. but good leadership is corralling idiots, Glimmer. not going off on your own. but she’s already planted the bait about the dining room.

‘we were the only ones who knew about the plan to take back dril’ ---- THEN WHY DID YOU INTERROGATE OTHER PEOPLE AHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHA

‘stop questioning my choices, stop whining about being a decoy’ YEAH FUCKIN HELL ADORA STOP BEING SUCH A FUCKING SHIT. IS THIS REALLY ‘TAKING CARE OF GLIMMER’????

‘all you do is question my authority, it’s exhausting.’ yeah god...it really is. adora needs to fucking BACK! OFF! but im loving these fights because it brings out the grievances. Adora is right to be worried about Glimmer no longer including her in her decisions. and she makes a good point that that’s bad. She makes a good point that Shadowweaver cannot be trusted. And Glimmer makes zero good points - except that it’s been hard for her and has garnered 0.1% understanding from the people around her. Oh they were working together. BUT those were definitely real grievances.

GLIMMER CAN ALREADY DO A CONTAINMENT SPELL LIKE THAT??? godDAMN. castapella completely flunked her responsibilities to Glimmer but shadowweaver did NOT.

hmmm so Solinius was....destroyed. but like, did the people die? like....the people? that’s the important bit isn’t it? i mean, they were under the sea right?

i suppose the problem i also have is that this show will NOT hurry up. normally i love filler stuff but ...the characters are too.....cheery. too flat. their quirks are fun and funny until they’re literally character flaws.

are the horde just literally attacking civilians? jezus. the war crimes. how did shadowweaver ever expect to trick Adora when she was released into the field?

‘you can’t just keep going off on your own!’ - SHE LITERALLY SAVED THE WHOLE FUCKING TOWN. SHE’S THE QUEEN! EVERYBODY SHOULD LISTEN TO HER! lolololol

the problem with Adora’s points is that everything about their dynamics are always so nebulous. why cant glimmer keep showing up to help out? WHY??? she’s the most capable fucking soldier in the field! she’s supposed to have full fucking authority! like, Adora isn’t in the right here. the problem is that her needling is only a symptom of her worries - which is that Glimmer doesn’t trust her any more. but the needling does NOTHING but make her seem like an idiot

i do love this trope reversal here - Seahawk deliberately damselling them to let the princesses save the boys? pffft

love catra getting the consequences for her actions regarding Scorpia. You can’t keep lashing out at people and expect them to stay my dear cat.....

oooohhh Glimmer.... you’re treading close to very hurtful territory. Blaming Adora for the Rebellion failing? for things she couldn’t do anything about? stupid.

really?? you’re really gonna fucking fight-resolution BLOCK ME? are you FUCKING kidding me? edging me for the whole GODDAMN SEASON??? and finally Adora cries at Glimmer going over the line????  fuckin I HATE the narrative decisions in this stupid show I FUCKING HATE THEM FUCK THESE WRITERS GOD FUKCING DAMMIT!!! this has been the whole GODDAMN SHOW!!!!!! ARGHGHGHGHGHGH

i’ve been waiting for a fucking resolution for Adora and Catra the whole! goddamn! SHOW! NOTHING! else matters! you do the exact same for glimmer and adora and now you let it fester again??? because of some no-stakes BULLSHIT? just give me the fucking godddamn PAYOFF for watching these kids be IDIOTS.

this fight on the boat is COOL and really wonderfully animated

really? Glimmer’s response to Adora being hurt and not wanting to be TOUCHED is to be angry herself? what a fucking IDIOT. god i can’t stand this. I CAN’T STAND IT

is this how people act? do they never take a moment to breathe and think and reflect and realise their priorities and take a step back and fucking apologise?

jezus FUCKING! CHRIST!

‘no matter what glimmer thinks of me’ oh that HURTED. oh damn. that’s so relatable. it’s a way to run, it’s a way to internalise the hurt and then prove the things that hurt wrong. the one that hurt you

I know Bo is supposed to be the emotionally intelligent one but he’s also too soft. He should go up to his friends individually and ask them the sharp questions. not - ‘communicate more positively’.

I just like Adora so much better when she’s alone. Her friendships’ positive moments are always so sappy or so....like over-exaggerated, the negative moments always so fucking annoying. Alone, Adora is generally driven, tragic, and cool. the problem is perhaps that i don’t care for the constant fucking drama

god i LOVE Mara so much - she’s so beautiful. and i LOVE learning more about the Old Ones. So they were trying to study Ehteria’s magic.... but then Bright Moon and the princesses were already here. The Magic-Like systems of the Old Ones are pure tech.

wow! even Mara’s transformation is way cooler.

so why was the first one’s tech (she ra) responsive to the magic? why does Raz know about She-Ra? when she ra is first ones tech????

WAIT ONE SECOND. She-Ra is ‘magic’ ??? it’s the SWORD that’s the first one’s tech! She-Ra is Etheria’s magic ! but how if the First Ones chose Mara. Did they steal She-Ra from Etheria?

so what im getting is that. the Old Ones colonised Etheria. Etheria has magic, and when Mara was chosen they made that girl an elite soldier - giving her a first one’s tech sword so she could ‘control’ Etheria’s magic. Then Mara was told to study the magic of Etheria - the ship implying that she’d not been on the planet before. then they created a Heart of Etheria project - which will probably turn the magic into a weapon. this was going to be used against Hordak Prime, im sure. I mean, Mara saved Etheria, but she did doom the rest of the universe to...extinction.... like, judging from Hordak’s strategy, Hordak Prime just literally exterminates planets and repopulates them with his clones....

But why would the planet choose a girl from amongst the colonisers - twice?

OOOHHH that anguished scream. i love anguished screams

why dont they put fucking safety belts in these ships. it’s not like the ship didn’t survive. only Mara got splatted (i guess)

also i love Mara. but damn Adora just got some more shit on her plate. why the fuck was she pushed through a portal again? for a She-Ra chain reaction?

I love madame Raz.

So they didn’t explicitly use it against Hordak Prime. and it wouldn’t have destroyed Etheria back then but it will now...

guh this showmakes it so hard to enjoy catra’s pain.

well they did finally have a good talk about it. I have to say, Glimmer is making good strategic sense - it’s just that this show only rewards harebrained schemes

Catra having a crazy panic attack cos she can’t find Scorpia and she’s completely lost and she knows its her fault. kinda love that for her. my heart

my dear Glimmer, theres a difference between absence of trust and absence of agreement.

they’re bringing king micah back just when angella is dead? oh fuckin lol

the horde....exiled micah? they exiled Micah instead of killing him???

why do they ALWAYS interrupt important conversations? i hate that shit. it’s cheap. it’s unsatisfying.

now THIS is what im here for - that unstoppable WILL!! john gonzalez is right - we watch stories for characters overcomign obstacles. writing, is creating the obstacle course. .....what does that say about me and my life....hmmm.

‘light hope told me everything i need to know’ - uhhh no she didn’t. she didn’t tell you how to harness the energy at all. ugh

how the fuck did double trouble escape. seems to me that they didn’t actually. they were let go....

it’s always so stupid when people try to tell other people: oh no you’ve got no plan - this is too risky! when that’s NEVER a problem

Glimmer is going to activate the weapon just in time for Hordak Prime to use it. And naturally she misses the return of her dad. fuck this

they’re gonna have Hordak and Catra fight? hmm

Double Trouble is right - this IS good for her - and it IS Catra - except for Shadowweaver’s case - she was an abusive bitch

I love Scorpia’s new cool fight music and also glowy eyes

is glimmer going to throw herself into lava??

the unfortunate thing is that Hordak Prime is right on the doorstep and he took over the whole universe or whatever. so they could probably have used that weapon. i mean the Old Ones must have seen something coming. there must be a reason they’re all GONE maybe????

why did Adora assume that all those stars would be destroyed?

THE ANIMATION ON THAT FINAL STUFF WAS INCREDIBLE AND EPIC

how the fukc are they going to beat Horde Prime lolololol.

i guess Glimmer really shouldn’t have done that. but at least she was in time to bond with Catra.