#Yes this was a wizard of oz reference

[sincerelykarai]

Peter: "Oh shit, it's raining." Looks at Gamora

Gamora: ???

Gamora: "Why are you looking at me?"

Peter: mischievously "it's just that typically witches melt when water gets on their skin."

Gamora internally: I'm gonna kill him, I'm actually going to kill him-

[acespeon]

The Wizard of Oz should be retitled High School Never Ends

[threeacttragedy]

Entry 17: The One About All the Hot Air

Oh, hey, hey, hey – what is that over there?

No, not that –

That!

Ah, fuck.

Is that what I think it is?

Yeah, yeah, it looks like some sort of hot air balloon.

Ugh, it’s that fucking wannabe Wizard! Get that manipulative shit-fuck outta here!

Seriously, don’t let it set foot on land. It’s not welcome on this side of Oz.

Someone release the flying monkeys! Like, now. Knock it out of the sky.

Wait, I thought the Wizard liked green. This weirdo has a red balloon.

Bitch, I didn’t say it was the Wizard; I said it was a wannabe Wizard.

Oh, no wonder it’s steering that balloon like a fucking clown.

Hell, I don’t even think we need the monkeys. That idiot is going to crash and burn itself straight into the glass walls of the Emerald Palace.

Well, you know what they say when you start throwing stones in a glass house…

It is slightly amusing (and a tad concerning) to me that children are always led to believe that the villain of “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz” is that bitch of a Witch of the West when the worst character traits are actually portrayed by the Wizard himself. And, by “worst character traits,” I mean that he was a master manipulator who conned an entire city into believing he held some form of great power.

Did you know that in the original story the Emerald City wasn’t really that green? Sure, it was made from green glass and emeralds, but the Wizard required everyone to wear green-colored glasses so that everything appeared greener than it actually was. Weird, that. And, even more weird, people bought it! “Here, put these glasses on and you’ll see everything exactly the way I want you to see it.”

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m fully aware “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz” is a work of fiction, but the idea that people can be easily manipulated – especially by someone with “power” – is not fiction.

That’s what today’s piece of “hot air” is about – fandom manipulation and the power of suggestion. And who better than to manipulate an entire fandom than the media? It’s unfortunate that I have to give the media power in this story – and even more unfortunate that I have to give it to rag-mags and social media – but the reality is information is power, regardless of whether it’s misinformation. In fact, MIT Sloan did a study in 2018 demonstrating how false information spreads through social media, namely, Twitter, six times faster than true information. Disturbing, right? I don’t even want to know what the going rate for misinformation is in 2025.

And, of course, since I opened today’s story with a visit to the Land of Oz, we may as well take a day trip over to Australia. Remember how I told you Australia deserved an entry of its own? Well, this is it. No, not really. I did say this was a day trip, not a sleep-over, so it’s not going to be chucked full of shiny bracelets or ways to “keep a good girl down.” It’s just our starting point today.

In my first entry, I briefly described what brought me into this fandom. It was something Luke said – and not really what he said, but how he said it – that left me intrigued. He was being interviewed on the Bowral red carpet by “Gretchen from the Philippines.” Yes, that’s literally how she introduced herself! Could I instead refer to the nice lady by her real name (Gretchen Fullido)? Sure, but “Gretchen from the Philippines” is far more fun. Plus, it sounds kind of whimsical. Any ways, Gretchen (from the Philippines) asked Luke if, “in real life,” he’d support friends-to-lovers. Luke’s response was, well, a bit jumbled, which was what sparked my curiosity because his previous answers that day were, for the most part, articulate: “I would – I would support friends – I feel like it’s not something that – that I have in my li – that I resonate with – that I’ve experienced. But, you know, if my – if my friends wanted to explore a relationship with one their friends, go for it. I’ll support it.”

Something in the way Luke answered that question was like suddenly being able to see the forest for the trees. At that moment, I was convinced Luke had always been in love with Nicola, and everything else that went on during that particular red-carpet event (and thereafter) simply christened the USS Lukola. However, that comment by Luke – and a subsequent one he made in New York – would result in the addition of a lot of trees to our enchanted forest.

Now – I apologize – we need to borrow a hot air balloon, preferably one that can travel through time, and jump forward to November 5, London-time. I promise, we will return to Oz momentarily.

Oh, fuck.

What now?

That ridiculous faux Wizard is right behind us. I thought I told you to send in the monkeys!

Dammit, you said we didn’t need them! I left those fuckers back in Oz.

Well, umm, I think we might need them now.

Why??

Uhh, do you see those four-legged beasts on the ground chasing our balloon?

Oh, you mean those coyote-like creatures?

Yeah, but we’re not in the Americas – and those ain’t coyotes…

Ah, here we are: November 5, Claridge’s, London. This was the evening Nicola attended the Harper’s Bazaar Women of the Year awards. We’re only stopping in real quick to steal a piece of the speech Nicola gave that evening. Okay, got it! Let’s get the fuck out of here!

The part of the speech I wanted to share was this: “I did a six-month press tour for Bridgerton, the show which I love, and I’m so proud of. The amount of inappropriate questions I got asked about my appearance, about my relationship…”

Hold up. Relationship? What relationship?

Did she say “relationship” or “relationships?”

Does it fucking matter?

Well, I guess not. But what does it mean?

I could tell you what I think it means… Wait a hot-air-balloon-minute – where the fuck have you taken us? I told you we needed to go back to April 21, Aussie-time. This looks like Soho in January.

Shit, sorry. Let me fix that. Here we go…

>>> 

Umm, hey, where’s that weird little red Wizard? I swear it was just behind us…

Eh, probably got stuck in Soho, hahaha. Guess it missed its exit.

Do you think that’s a good idea?

Yeah, sure. It’ll be fine…

We’ve returned to April 21, Bowral, Australia. Now, at this point in the timeline, World Tour interviews were already well underway. In fact, the first two parts of EmEdits on YouTube are entirely pre-Australia interviews, making up roughly 6 ½ hours of screen time. I’m not the least bit surprised that “Gretchen from the Philippines” asked Luke what his thoughts were on “real life” friends-to-lovers. The chemistry between Luke and Nicola was hard to ignore.

The Australian red carpet also introduced the hand holding, which – if we took another magical mystery tour over to May 9, Italy – Nicola and Luke agreed was a sign of “love.” I suppose I could buy the excuse that one or both had so much anxiety they needed the other’s hand to remain calm on the red carpet. But, nah, I wouldn’t buy that at all – for one very specific reason. When Luke and Nicola were seen leaving (I believe) the Milton Park Country House on April 23, Luke instinctively reached for Nicola’s hand as they were descending the steps. Why? This reflex by Cool Hand Luke was as natural as a pregnant woman touching her stomach. I ask again – why?

There’s only one answer.

It’s the answer that fits with the Claddagh ring. It’s the answer that fits with the side jaunt to Galway. It’s the answer that fits with their natural chemistry, the hand holding, the canned “shared experience” and “unique relationship” responses, the playful sexual innuendos. It’s the answer that fits with Luke’s “the best foundation for love is friendship” bracelet. It’s the answer that fits with Nicola’s remark about “[t]he amount of inappropriate questions I got asked…about my relationship…” It’s the only fucking answer that makes sense.

But, the real kicker is, why don’t people believe that is the answer?

Why is it so hard to believe that Luke and Nicola could be in a real-life relationship?

That’s easy – because the Man Behind the Curtain told us so.

Who is the Man Behind the Curtain? Well, that’s also easy. It’s collectively the rag-mags and the social media creators on the prowl for a following. It’s the spread of misinformation at its worst and it’s so incredibly easy to do with, say, a pair of green-colored glasses.

Like I said, “…put these glasses on and you’ll see everything exactly the way I want you to see it.”

There was one major plot twist that came out of the World Tour, and you already know what that is. The seed was planted with a New Year’s Eve kiss, fertilized with blurry pictures, a compulsory hallway hug, and copycat photos, and encouraged to grow with a bit of junk news and a lot of social media innuendo. Now, I’m not saying the video and photographic evidence that was presented was fabricated; I’m simply suggesting the narrative that came out that evidence was skewed. The media, namely, social media creators, pushed us to plant Lutonia trees while Luke’s actions (i.e., not acknowledging the existence of Lutonia) told us to “pay no attention to the Man Behind the Curtain.”

Uh, so, what you’re saying is we shouldn’t have left that wannabe Wizard in Soho?

Ah, shit! I forgot about that fucker!

The unfortunate thing about the Lutonia narrative was that it was bolstered by insinuation that Luke would never be interested in Nicola. Now, whether these remarks were deliberately planted, or they were simply seedpods carried away by a storm, they were not overlooked by Lukolas – or Nicola. In fact, Nicola herself brushed upon it in her Harper’s Bazaar speech: “The amount of inappropriate questions I got asked about my appearance…” Yes, I’m referring to the suggestion that Luke preferred “brunettes” over “blondes.” Somehow this narrative was conveniently supported by the existence of – lo and behold! – the brunette “friend of a friend” Antonia, who happened to be slender. Again, whether it was intentional or not, the push by, initially, social media creators (and later gossip rags) to link Luke to Antonia inadvertently called the blonde in our story – Nicola – fat. I refuse to dance around that word because it is exactly what this disgusting narrative implied when it chose to compare Antonia to Nicola. Regardless of whether these gossipmongers “corrected” themselves by replacing “thin” with “brunette” and “fat” with “blonde,” the implication was that Luke would never be interested in Nicola because she had thick blonde hair. This was incredibly upsetting and confusing to many Lukolas because it was contrary to Luke’s behavior towards Nicola throughout the World Tour (and in Bridgerton behind-the-scenes clips).

I decided months ago that Luke was incredibly transparent. And, by that, I mean he’s terrible at keeping secrets. Luke himself admitted his “tell” to this was pulling at his ear – now go watch the World Tour with that information in mind. It’ll give you something to do, at the very least. Luke’s sincerity is also why the blonde versus brunette nonsense just doesn’t take flight for me. Any ways, as I hinted at earlier, Luke’s comments on the Bowral red carpet and his later comments in New York City about friends-to-lovers would – again, unfortunately – give the Man Behind the Curtain ammunition to debunk any real-life relationship between Luke and Nicola. Luke was quickly labeled as being “…dismissive of something ever happening between him and Nicola…” Those are literally the words The Tab used in an article dated May 22 to explain Luke and Nicola’s differing commentary about real-life friends-to-lovers. In fact, the article is titled, “Luke Newton has revealed the reason he’d never date Bridgerton co-star Nicola Coughlan.” Oddly – but not really given the source – Luke never actually said he would never date Nicola. But that fact didn’t stop it from becoming a theme of the World Tour – Luke didn’t believe in friends-to-lovers therefore he would never date Nicola – even though, by the end of the tour, Luke’s stance on this had seemingly changed. That’s not to say the rag-mags misquoted Luke – they didn’t – but the narrative they coiled around his words attempted to shut down the idea that Luke and Nicola would ever date in real life because Luke wasn’t interested. But what Luke was saying was that he believed in love-at-first sight. “I actually don’t think friends-to-lovers is something that happens in my life. If I meet someone, I know immediately.” Now, take that statement with the fact that Luke has repeatedly stated he remembers everything about the moment he met Nicola.

The above examples of gossip and innuendo are simply par for the course. The media manipulates facts all the time – whether it be through social media chatter or rag-mags putting their own spin on ordinary commentary – but this type of manipulation is not what puts the fandom in danger of itself. In fact, most of the gossip and innuendo that took root during the World Tour would have dissipated almost immediately after it ended – if it hadn’t been for Papsmear.

Yeah. That was disastrous.

Come to think of it, it was awfully convenient, too, don’t you think?

Absolutely. And you know what else was convenient? That little wannabe Wizard was –

Oh, yeah, I heard that, too! That clown has been trying to hand out green-colored glasses ever since!

Yep. Tried to give me a pair and I told it to go fuck itself and its little glass cat, too. I mean, they weren’t even name brand glasses. Fake ass, bitch.

All jesting aside, if you haven’t noticed already, I do, on occasion, use my writing to call out the fandom, usually as a whole. I mean, we are in this together, right? Actually, no; we ceased being Collectively Delulu after a few unsavory characters were bitten by the Hunter’s Moon and followed Nicola through the streets of New York and London. There was a major – and rather unexpected – shift in the fandom when the rabid Jakolas appeared from the dark corners of our enchanted forest. And I’m sure you’ve realized at this point in my story that I have one particular – oh, shit, I just realized I don’t even know to which fandom our wannabe Wizard belongs. Ruh-roh. Regardless, that motherfucker is in my peep sight because it is a perfect example of how fandom manipulation has reached a new level of toxicity.

Typically, I don’t care what part of the fandom you’re on. My general attitude is, to each their own. If you’re a Jakola and you find yourself spending an average of 15 minutes each week reading my Lukola blog, I applaud you for peeking outside of the den hole. Best not let Alpha find out, though. It’s all in good fun, right? I often find myself getting a good laugh from Jakola stories, especially when they theorize on the Woman Behind the Curtain. Question, though – did you find her? In all seriousness, if I didn’t consider Jakola and Lutonia perspectives, I would be borderline Conscientiously Stupid, now, wouldn’t I? After all, the desire for knowledge is what ultimately gave our Scarecrow his brain.

However, what I don’t find “in good fun” is when social media creators prey on more than one side of the fandom under phony pretense, namely, that they “just want Nicola to be happy.” Oh, these Cowardly Lions may argue that they’re simply being “neutral” – and, yes, I’m sure some instances of this do exist – however, neutrality does not embrace openly ridiculing one fandom over another, especially on a platform that is touted by its owners as being a “safe space” for everyone. The problem with these so-called “neutral creators” is that they’re only here for social media engagement – the clicks and the giggles – and they defect to the other side when the going gets tough. If you, too, take issue with this kind of creator, be soothed in knowing that when you play two sides, you find yourself with two-times the number of enemies.

What makes these so-called “neutral creators” – actually, let’s just call them the “Defectors” – so poisonous to the fandom is that they are made from the grease drippings found at the bottom of the barrel of the Conscientiously Stupid. The Conscientiously Stupid are one thing – they are the ones using their platforms to spread misinformation because they choose to ignore exculpatory evidence (i.e., they’re headstrong in their beliefs) – but the Defectors are typically the ones creating the misinformation and feeding it to the Conscientiously Stupid and then hanging them out to dry when the information proves to be false. The Conscientiously Stupid who refuse to “lose the battle” then resort to bullying (more so than usual) the Sincerely Ignorant of an opposing fandom. And in defense of their Sincerely Ignorant comrades (or simply because they’re sick and tired of the Conscientiously Stupid preventing anyone from having nice things), the Fact Finders – unceremoniously, I might add – have taken their own place on the battlefield (oh, yes, they are absolutely your tactical commanders). Now, the entire fandom is at war with each other – all because some wannabe Wizard – a Defector – convinced people to look through a pair of shiny, green-colored glasses. More than once.

Is it appropriate – or perhaps a bit catty – to put “ceasefire” here?

Ah, yes, well, uh, we have found ourselves a bit far from Oz at this point, haven’t we?

I suppose – but we are trying to help Dorothy find her way back home, and at least we now have an idea as to how she got lost.

Maybe one day we will get her back to Kansas.

Yeah, maybe.

Oh, silly me! I forgot to sneak in a sly reference to Dorothy’s third companion – the Tin Man! He’s perfect for the end of our story. You know, in the book, the Wizard was just an ordinary man who stumbled into his Ozian existence on a magnificent hot air balloon and took advantage of the power that Emerald citizens bestowed upon him. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the Wizard preyed on the naïve using deception and the power of suggestion and invoked fear in anyone who dared to question his authority –

Uh, where are you going with this?

Give me a minute!

Like I said – shit, where was I? – Oh, yes, the Wizard was just an ordinary man, and ordinary people are flawed. We all make mistakes. This is where our Tin Man comes in as he represents love and empathy. Yes, empathy; the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, to understand and forgive, to take into consideration someone’s redeeming qualities –

You know that Wizard defected in his hot air balloon before taking Dorothy home, right?

Wait, what?

Okay, okay. It was Toto’s fault but the Wizard sure as shit didn’t come back for her!

Hmm, you’d almost think Toto knew the Wizard’s true colors all along…

“Au revoir, Wiz.”

[sunfirekid]

This wasn't his first rodeo in meeting an anthropomorphic creature. In fact he one on his crew, a red panda mink. Though this was definitely his first time meeting a blue hedgehog, and he didn't know that those even existed. Which where he was from, they probably didn't, but as Sonic, as he introduced himself, shared Hiru was somewhere called Green Hill Zone in....Mobius?

The pirate captain would blink at the revelation, of course certain things like the robots that were destroyed were far more advanced than anything he had seen before, and Sonic's abilities that he witnessed did give him pause but he hadn't explored the whole world so he figured there were things he had just never seen before. However, now, knowing what he did now it kind of made more sense that he was a long way from his home.

"Green Hill Zone of Mobius, huh?" Hiru would repeat as he took in the greenery of the location. "Yeah, ya weren't kidding I'm definitely not in Saskan anymore, Sonic." Hiru would let out a chuckle before continuing. "Saskan was the island I was exploring on before I ended up here. There was this big ring like structure and when I touched it the next thing I knew I was falling from the sky." He pointed up above where the two were standing. "And ya know the rest, I saw ya dealing with those robots and joined in to help." Hiru would look up in the sky and see that there was no ring portal or what have you still in the sky.

He'd look back at Sonic and put his arms behind his head with a grin. "Looks like I'm stuck here until I can find another one of those ring thingies to get me back home. Hopefully Sonic the Hedgehog doesn't mind having Hiru the Human tag along for a little while and show him around?"

{{ L }} Well, Hiru would be one of the few humans that hadn't automatically assumed Sonic was a rat. So points for him. Swiping his index finger under his nose, a chuckle leaving the Blue Blur.

" Yeah, I'm a hedgehog, and you're definitely far from home. " From the sound of it, the other was definitely from a world Sonic hadn't been to before. " Either way, nice to meet ya, Hiru. Name's Sonic, Sonic the Hedgehog, and you have found yourself in Green Hill Zone of Mobius. "

[blackynsupremacy]

YOU AND COOPER

WATCHING WICKED

HEADCANONS

pairing: cooper koch x black!fem!reader

summary: being theater kids, it’s only natural that you and your best friend become absolutely obsessed with the 2024 movie adaptation of wicked.

contains: inspo from the bestie @austeenbootler, platonic relationship, fluff, comedy, swearing, a bit of a self insert, cooper just being the best of besties.

taglist: @greengoblinswifey @thabiddie23 @hopefully-saturn @jkr820 @hoffmansgirl @austeenbootler @niteskysx @sabrinasopposite @thabiddie23 @hnch33rios @xoxoglittergossip @supaprettyg @motherismotheringggg @oscarisaackissmykitty @simply-lovley44 @elitesanjisimp @gxuxhdjdu @venic-bxtch @stargirl-mayaa @miguelspvssy

a/n: i just saw wicked for the second time! can you guys tell i love me some musical theater? if you guys like musicals, tell me some of your favorites in the comments! i love phantom, wicked, hairspray, heathers, grease, hamilton, shrek, and mamma mia. more cooper fics coming soon

• let’s face it, you and cooper koch share many things in common that solidify your friendship.

• but the one thing that binds you together the most is your shared love of broadway musicals.

• you both done musical theater and show choir in high school and college. that’s where some of your greatest memories lie.

• sometimes you got leads, other times, supporting and ensemble roles.

• you and cooper are the typical music theater nerds.

• you’ve got playbills, soundtracks, and various merchandise from your favorite musicals.

• you both would randomly burst into a show-tune when the opportunity serves.

• of course you both know quotes, lines, and choreography.

• one year for halloween, you went as danny and sandy from grease.

• wicked is one of your favorites! you both have seen it live on broadway in 2022.

• you had to see this specific tour because you wanted to see brittney johnson, the first black glinda, in action!

• you and cooper enjoyed yourselves! if you could see it for the first time again, you would.

• you even cried tears of joy because as a black woman who loves musical theater, it was so refreshing to see someone who looks like you starring in roles that weren’t stemmed from a stereotype.

• you firmly believed that when it comes to most roles, the casting should be determined by talent instead of looks.

• “aw, n/n!” cooper would endearingly say, bringing you in for a hug because he knew how important this was to you and he was going to support you every step of the way.

• fast forward to when you hear that wicked would be getting a film adaptation starring ariana and cynthia.

• you saw cynthia’s work in the color purple, so you knew she would absolutely smash it as elphaba vocally, theatrically, and aesthetically.

• you and cooper were counting down the days until the premiere.

• he’d wear pink, you’d wear green.

• when it was a week before the premiere, you both got your nails done to celebrate.

• you got a green full set while cooper got a regular manicure with clear pink polish and tiny green hearts.

• at the l.a. premiere, you were both so excited to be there on the red carpet in your coordinated outfits and accessories.

• your faces practically hurt from smiling out of excitement for so long.

• no matter if you were taking photos or doing interviews, you were both so hyped for it!

• the highlight of your evening was getting a photo with cynthia and ariana.

• girl, you and cooper were going to treasure that night forever.

• the move itself: a masterpiece.

• you knew when released to the general public, it would blow the box office out of the water.

• you and cooper had to contain yourselves from singing along.

• the visuals, the soundtrack, the dialogue, and the subtle reference to the manin story of the wizard of oz was immaculate.

• CYNTHIA AND ARIANA RESPECTIVELY DID THE DAMN THING!

• johnathan bailey as fiyero looked so damn sexy. he had you and cooper swooning during his scenes.

• michelle yeoh served cunt as madame morrible.

• the whole film gave you and cooper chills.

• you’d never be the same.

• after the premiere and after party, you and cooper were tired, but at the same time, still on a high from it all.

• “okay, but can we talk about how adorable gelphie is? you can’t tell me that they’re not in love.” you say sitting on the couch after grabbing you and cooper some drinks.

• “it’s so obvious! like, they need to elope and let me have fiyero.” cooper replied, you agree with his statement by raising your glass and clinking it with his, “that part!”

• you didn’t forget about one more character.

• “okay, coop, hear me out—the wizard could get it lowkey.” you confess and giggle at how well jeff goldblum had aged like fine wine.

• “girl—hold on…” cooper took a pause and a swig of his drink before nodding in agreement, “now that i’m thinking about it, i hear you loud and clear.”

• you stayed up and did karaoke of “popular” with cooper as glinda of course.

• he’s such a diva.

• whether you consider yourself a singer or not, you’re not afraid to hit that “defying gravity” riff.

• at the end of the day, you wouldn’t trade this whole experience for anything as you were dancing through life as just two friends.

• two good friends.

• two best friends.

[sturniolo-rat]

The High Life Part 1

Matt Sturniolo X Stoner!Reader

Part 2

A/N: because I need a babysitter when I’m high and this is generally how it goes.

Contains: fluff💕, daddy k!nk

TW: drug use

In which Matt babysits a high Y/N and she becomes submissive and breedable😏

“Matt, would you still love me if I was a worm?” Y/N asks, looking at him through a cloud of smoke.

He looks up from his game “You’re high as shit, but yes, I would, the fuck”? She’s always asking dumbass questions when she smokes. Matt doesn’t smoke himself, but he likes to be around to watch Y/N. Not only does she look really hot, but she becomes so baby, and he wants to take care of her. 

“Okay, but what would you do?” She looks up at him expectantly, looking for a very specific answer.

He turns in his chair. “I’d put you somewhere safe and find the wizard bastard that did this to you.”

Y/N shakes her head furiously. “No, there’s no wizard. The universe just took my human form back and decided I was actually supposed to be a worm.” She says, pulling the rolling tray onto her lap as she sits on the bed facing him crisscross applesauce.

“Alright, easy.” He claps his hands. I got this.” She pauses grinding her weed to lean in. This time, she’s hoping for a more pleasing answer. “I’m going outside every day, rain or shine, even if it’s a hurricane, and I’m screaming up at the sky and demanding the universe turn you back.”

Wrong again. “Oh, so you only care for my human body and not my worm body?” she says indignantly as she struggles to roll her joint.

He grabs her face and kisses her forehead. “Baby, please, you already know you’d have a 6-foot terrarium in our room” he takes her rolling tray off of her and starts fixing her shitty rolling. “but I know you’d be sad cuz you wouldn’t be able to talk. Hence my screaming at the universe.” He licks the end of the rolling paper and seals the joint up. “It’s all for you, my love.” And he holds the perfectly rolled joint out. He learned to roll for her recently. He can only roll joints thought because blunts are for losers, and Y/N doesn’t fuck with tobacco. 

She takes it from him, completely shocked. “Well,, I guess that’s nice of you?” Referring to his hypothetical screaming and his unhypothetical miracle joint rolling skills. “Since when did you know how to do anything even remotely related to drugs?” 

“Last week. I thought I would help my baby out in all her endeavors.” He cracks a smile, knowing he’s thoroughly impressed her. 

She spaces out for a few seconds, then Says, “Could I come outside sometimes?”

He nods, instantly, knowing that her brain just did a factory reset, and is talking about the worm hypothetical again. “Mhmm, I’d put you in my shirt pocket, and we’d go on dates, and I’d get you plates of dirt to eat.” This was not the answer she was looking for because it was so much better, and just so perfectly Matt.

“You’re amazing.”

He pats her head. “I’ll go get you some snacks and water, Lovie.” He leaves, and Y/N feels so comfy and loved. 

“Get my special cup, please!” she yells to the kitchen. The cup in question is a 40-oz stainless steel tumbler that says Daddy’s Girl. Matt knows she’s in subspace. 

When he comes back to the room, Y/N is all cuddled up in bed with the stuffed shark he won at the fair last month. He’s got her special cup in hand and his arms full of chips. He throws them all on the bed and hands over the cup. “Got your cuppy, Sweetheart.”

“Thank you, Daddy.” he never liked being called Daddy before he met Y/N. She just brings something out in him. When she’s around, he just wants to take care of her in every conceivable way. 

“Anything for you, Baby.” He sits beside her on the bed, and she lies her head on his lap. Matt feeds her chips as they watch Family Guy. It’s amusing watching tv with Y/N when she’s high because she can’t follow the plot story shit. He likes asking her what she thinks is happening and listening to her crazy, convoluted answers. 

Somehow, over the course of a couple of hours Y/N ends up sitting between his legs with her back against his chest. She cranes her neck and stares up at him for a while. His lips look so soft, and she can’t look away. Matt notices this and tries to focus her back on the show. “So, what do you think Brian and Stevie are up to right now?”

“D’know.” She shrugs and continues to look at him.

“Do you need something, baby?” He asks.

“Mhmm,” she said, shaking her head and biting her lip.

Matt knows exactly where she’s going with this. “What do you need,

Love. You have to tell me before I can help you.”

“I need you, Daddy.” with that, she opens up a whole new can of worms.

Smutty part 2

Masterlist

Taglist

[vidavalor]

Brenda and Ron

Remember Madame Tracy's obnoxious regular customer, Brenda, and her long-suffering, dead husband Ron? Yeah, I'm pretty sure they're a big clue about The Metatron-- yes, The Metatron-- and how this could go down in The Finale...

Brenda: Her name means-- I kid you not-- "flaming sword."

While Brenda is absolutely fucking obnoxious, she's also something of an inverted Aziraphale parallel here. Brenda, by design, is kind of like if you took everything great about Aziraphale and intentionally did the opposite with it. She's bigoted, she's mean, she hates kimchi lol, she was bullying and rude in her loveless marriage to her long-suffering husband, Ron, who couldn't stand her... She's basically the opposite of our open-minded, sushi-loving angel and the kind, loving, mutually-adoring relationship he has with his partner. Everything terrible about Brenda is notable in the way that it brings to mind how she directly contrasts with Aziraphale.

What our flaming sword of Brenda does have in common with our flaming sword of Aziraphale, though, is that there is someone she cannot easily access whose voice is on another type of astral plane and with whom she needs to speak with great urgency.

For Brenda, it's about her regular attempts to speak with her late husband, Ron, while, for Aziraphale, it's about him taking the rare step of powering up the circle in the floor and trying to reach God. Brenda has nothing of any real note to tell Ron while Aziraphale is quite literally trying to save the world.

When Aziraphale attempts to reach God, he, too, reaches a medium of sorts-- The Metatron, who claims to be the person who can speak for God... just as Madame Tracy claims to be able to be the voice of Ron.

We're a bit doubtful about The Metatron's claims because, unlike Aziraphale, we have seen the opening titles of this show where Frances McDormand is credited rather specifically as "The Voice of God" so, when the wonderful Sir Derek Jacobi shows up as floating head claiming to be God's mouthpiece and is this condescending, cold, shifty, Wizard-of-Oz-esque asshole, we're pretty sure that Frances McDormand is the voice we should trust more-- regardless of whatever the deal with Her might be, exactly.

Backing this up is that The Metatron's parallel is another charlatan. This one being one we actually like-- Madame Tracy.

While Aziraphale attempted to talk to God and got sidelined by a character claiming to be a medium to God, Brenda regularly believes that she speaks to "her Ron" through her sessions with Madame Tracy... whom the audience can clearly see is only pretending to be Ron... just, perhaps, as The Metatron is only pretending to be able to speak to God.

Now, take Good Omens' words-within-words wordplay thing and break the word metatron up. While the inclination is to break it like "meta tron"-- and that does yield results-- for the purpose of this meta, break it like this:

The Metatron: Me Tat Ron. The word tat comes from tatting, a verb used to refer to making knotted lace. A tat is a knot in tatting. Me Tat Ron = Me Knot Ron... or: I'm Not God.

So, in our parallel here, we also have aligning the persons our Brenda and our Aziraphale are trying to contact. For Brenda, it's her dead husband, Ron, and for Aziraphale, it's God, right? Ron = God.

Ron: Short for Ronald. Means all of the following: counsel rule; advice of a sovereign; a song of joy. Ron is also apparently a Hebrew word for joy.

What bit of the apparent words of The Voice of God does Gabriel remember because it's the only thing he's clinging to as proof that maybe God is real and would approve of his disapproval of The Metatron and the demonizing of the demons?

"I remember when the morning stars sang together and all the angels of God shouted for joy."

He remembers what sounds an awful lot like a prophecy of what's to come-- when all the angels of God get together, look to the people who are like independent, sovereign nations among them (like Crowley, Aziraphale, Gabriel & Beez) and demand their freedom to pursue joy and live under a democratic form of government. They're all shouting for joy-- for Ron-- and how might they get it in The Finale?

What can we see from what happened when Aziraphale and Brenda's stories crossed into one another in S1?

Aziraphale's hilarious possession of Madame Tracy while she's in a session with Brenda results in Aziraphale bringing in the real Ron and we get what will be the opposite of how this will go-- the contrasting parallel to the Heaven story like this in The Finale.

Brenda, for the first time since her husband died, actually hears his voice. She's awful, though, so she squanders this and just starts complaining to him and Ron flips out (not very joyful lol), shouting at her to "shut up", glad he can tell her off in death at least when he never did in life.

We're left with Aziraphale's hilariously dry "wasn't that touching?"

Brenda and the two with her are, ironically and amusingly, not really changed much by the fact that the real Ron was heard. Brenda was a true believer and the woman she brought was pretty easily manipulated. The man thought it was a charade but was along for the ride, willing to credit Madame Tracy with a good time when it was all done, saying she provided good entertainment value.

Nothing really changes as a result of this Ron revelation because it's the lower stakes, contrasting parallel. It's the little plot that, really, secretly, is the same thing as the big plot still to come. In that bigger plot, with the involvement of our main characters and the much higher stakes, the opposite could well happen-- the revelation of The Metatron being a fraud will actually change everything.

The point is that everyone involved with the Madame Tracy arrangement was getting out of it what they needed or wanted so no real offense was taken. Nothing changed because no one needed it to change-- which is the complete opposite of the angels and demons in Heaven/Hell. Brenda was getting a place to work out her grief, her guests were getting to support Brenda in that process and be entertained along the way, and Madame Tracy was getting paid-- so, no harm, no real foul here. But the paralleling situation to this?

That one is much more serious. That's fate-of-the-world serious. That's a being in The Metatron who isn't just trying to keep a roof over their head and meals on the table for them and the lovable old idiot next door by pretending to be a fortune teller like Madame Tracy was. That's a fascist ruling an empire of a bonkers number of angels who has amassed enough power to try to destroy Earth and every person on it. It's not Madame Tracy's handful of satisfied clients; it's countless, miserable beings who are being oppressed.

Now, think about what happened here to cause the emergence of Ron and how this is a parallel to the Aziraphale and The Metatron story...

Ron was only able to enter the conversation when Aziraphale possessed Madame Tracy. In doing so, he took over Madame Tracy-- he usurped her power.

Madame Tracy allowed him to do this where The Metatron never ever will but the idea is that the truth of Ron-- God, in our parallel here; democracy and freedom and joy-- will emerge only if Aziraphale can surpass The Metatron in power.

Note that I didn't say that all of this changes if Aziraphale takes over Gabriel's job. I said he needs to surpass The Metatron in power. How does Aziraphale do that?

He's actually already done it-- by being Aziraphale.

The only thing more powerful in Heaven right now than The Metatron is the collective power of everyone who would move to defend Aziraphale *from* The Metatron. He's the motivation for everyone to come together.

It's just all about going directly at The Metatron and taking his power. It's doing that which can reveal the truth about The Metatron and God and lead to an appearance by our metaphorical Ron-- lead to the changes in Heaven that the end of our story needs.

In the parallel in our main story, it won't be the Brenda/Aziraphale who gets screamed at to "shut up"-- it will be the Madame Tracy/The Metatron. Our main angels and demons are really The Voice of Ron this time around and, just like how it took Aziraphale to make it so that a guy named Ron could be heard in S1, it will take Aziraphale again to make Heaven get the Ron-- joy, democracy, freedom-- that they've been desperate for all this time.

Either way, it's going to be funny when the angels and demons get The Metatron cornered and demand to talk to Frances McDormand and The Metatron does about this great a job at it 😂...

Also, bonus interesting bit related to who is going to help with this in The Finale is that Jim is among the common names mentioned in the hilarious moment of Madame Tracy trying to hit on the name of a guy that Brenda's guest knew.

Did Brenda's friend know a Jim? No, he didn't. In the contrasting parallel, though, Crowley and Aziraphale got to know a Jim pretty well recently and, funnily enough? Much like Brenda's skeptical friend with Madame Tracy in S1, our Jim seems like the one character who is pretty sure that this whole 'The Metatron Speaks For God' thing is a charade.

[justmeinadaze]

Take It Out On Me Part 20 (Steddie X Plus Size Reader)

Warnings: Daddy Steve/ Sir Eddie and Sub Fem Plus size reader, you aren't going to see a lot those dynamics in this chapter. She does refer to them by their titles occasionally but due to the situation refers to them by their names more than anything. There is SMUT of the fluffy slightly vanilla variety (I know its weird lol), FLUFF, they love each other and they're a family <3.

ANGST, sooooo much angst which if you read the last chapter you were prepared for (or if you know me lol), they do have dinner with his mom and they do talk about their abuse so a domestic abuse and child abuse trigger warning is in effect! They don't go into full details but hitting and bleeding is mentioned. Eddie talks about his abandonment and feeling replaced. There are feels but there is a peaceful resolution :). I wanted that for Eddie <3.

Word Count: 3983

“Baby, relax.”, Steve coos in a gentle tone as he comes up behind you to turn off the sink and collect you in his arms. 

You had been scurrying around the apartment doing busy work while Eddie finished getting ready. Tonight was the dinner with his mom at Wayne’s trailer and you were extremely nervous. 

“I’m trying. I’m just worried about him.”

“I know, honey. Everything’s going to be alright. Thanks to you he’s not doing this alone.”

You sigh as you lean into his embrace and rest your arms over his own. 

“I need you to make sure I don’t get arrested tonight because I swear to God, if she says one rude thing—”

“Ok, Rocky. Chill.”, he chuckles as he kisses your lips. 

“Alright, I’m ready.”, Eddie exhales heavily as he comes out of the bedroom and grabs his jacket. “Let’s get this over with.”

***

“How’s he doin’?”, Wayne asked as you helped him in the kitchen. 

The original plan was to have the meal outside so everyone wouldn’t feel so cramped but as if sensing the mood, a storm slowly creeped into Hawkins and began to pour as soon as you three made it into the trailer. The boys helped set up a table in the living room while you took the opportunity to catch up with Eddie’s uncle. 

“He’s been as okay as he can be. Definitely more clingy which I don’t mind. He had work the other day and asked if I could hang out with him during his shift.”

“Yeah… When he was a boy, after he moved in, he used to carry around this Wizard of Oz book like a safety blanket. I noticed after a while whenever he was nervous or anxious, he would bring it with him wherever he went and read it. I was honestly surprised when he left it here after he moved. Must have found a new thing to comfort him.”, he grinned as he patted your shoulder. 

“Is it still in his room?”

Wayne nodded as you excused yourself to go look, finding it by his dresser, and coming back to slip it in your purse. A knock on the door causes everyone to freeze as his uncle takes one last big breath and heads to open it. 

You quickly place yourself by Eddie’s side as he reaches out to hold your hand.

“Here we go.”

#################

His mother was a lot smaller than you imagined her being but your only frame of reference was the photo you had seen of her in his room with all the Munson’s together. She was a curvy woman and her short black hair accentuated the slight chipmunk plump of her cheeks. Her energy radiated the same softness that Eddie carried but you were still apprehensive especially after what she had done. 

As she entered the trailer and Wayne took her coat, Eddie remained still as his eyes constantly scanned her over. 

“Lynn, this is, um, Eddie’s best friend Steve Harrington.”

“You’re the other boy that had gotten hurt in the fire.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Thank you for saving him.”

Steve just nodded politely as Wayne gestured towards you. “This is their girlfriend, Y/N Y/L/N.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

You followed Steve’s lead, choosing to nod as well without saying a word. 

When she made it to her son, both people were completely unsure on how to proceed. Testing the water, his mom extended her hand for him to shake and his reaction surprised you both as he slightly flinched, taking a step backwards away from her.

“The, uh, food is done. Steven, can you help me bring the last of it to the table here?”

Wayne knew better than to ask you. There was no way you were leaving Eddie’s side now that she was here. Once everything was placed and everyone was seated, his uncle handled the bulk of the conversation, making small talk where he could to cut the tension. 

“I see you’re still a wonderful cook, Wayne.”

“Hm. Thank you. Since I work overnight, I don’t get to cook as much as I’d like but…”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I was a night nurse for a while after I moved so it was a lot of microwave meals.”

“Oh? So, you, um, became a nurse?”

“I did. I had some experience with healing wounds…so…” Her head hung as her voice trailed off. “Um, how long have you guys been together?”, she asks as gestures towards you.

“A little over three years.”

“Well, that’s nice. Did you know each other in school?” 

When you only nod, Wayne tries to help again. 

“I think Ed told me he met Y/N junior year? Steve we’ve known for a while even though I don’t think you started coming over, son, till middle school.”

“Uh, yes sir. 7th grade I believe. It’s funny to think about since I came over to listen to music and watch movies but our tastes are so different.”

“Oh, the fact that he has some and you don’t?”, you tease as Steve smiles and sticks his tongue out at you.

“What kind of things are you into?”, she asks Eddie. The boy continues to glare at his plate as he moves food around with his fork.

“He’s taken Y/N here to a few concerts like Dio and Poison if I’m not mistaken.”

“My daughter is into heavy metal as well. My husband and I just bought her a drum set and she just…” She trailed off again when she noticed Eddie was finally looking at her. “You’d, um, you’d really get along with her.”

“Yeah? How old is she?”

“She just turned 9.”

“Huh. Sounds like her double digits are going to be WAY better than mine.”, the man sassed as he folded his arms and leaned back in his seat. “Just out of curiosity, how many more are there?”

“I have three with my current husband. My oldest is 9, my other daughter is 6, and my son…is 3.”

“Your oldest is actually 21 but I’m glad you were finally able to have another son. Now you can replace me entirely.”

She flinched at his words as your hand gripped his thigh. 

“I thought about you every day, Eddie.”, she whispered.

“Well, that’s good to know. While I was bleeding on the floor after the violent man you left me with knocked me out, it comforts me to know you didn’t forget about me.”, he growls before abruptly rising to his feet. “I need a minute.”

Nobody moves as he stomps towards his old bedroom and slams the door.

“Maybe this was a bad idea.”

“I mean, what did you expect, Lynn? You never came back for him like you said you would.”

“You told me you would take him, Wayne—”

“Don’t. Don’t push the blame on him.”, you warned. “The truth of the matter is you SAID you were coming back and you never did.”

“You don’t know what it was like…living with Allen…”

“You’re right. I don’t but thanks to you, your child does.”

You stand and Steve promptly trails after you as you carefully open Eddie’s door. Both of you found him sitting on his bed, smoking out the window like he used to when you three lived there. As you climbed in to sit beside him, his hand immediately shot out to stop you. 

“I wouldn’t get too close to me, sweetheart. I’m, uh, not all here.”, he lightly chuckles as his voice cracks.

Squaring your jaw in defiance, you climb in anyway and take his free hand in yours. 

“Like that’s going to stop me. I’m not afraid of you, Edward Munson.”

“You doing alright, dude?”, Steve asked as he sat on the edge of the mattress. 

“I’m, um, trying not to fall apart here. I really want to yell at her but I don’t…I don’t want her to think I’m like my dad.”

“Baby…”, you coo as you run your fingers through his hair. “You’re allowed to be angry. What she did wasn’t ok and you’re allowed to tell her that anyway you feel you need to.”

Eddie softly smiles as he tilts his head to kiss your lips and tosses his cigarette out the window. Taking your hand in his, the three of you leave his bedroom and back to the table where his mom and Wayne were still talking.

“—didn’t leave any kind of formal documentation for me to have him, Lynn. Did you really think Allen was just going to hand him over?”

“Why didn’t you come back?”, Eddie asked as soon as he sat down.

“I-I-I…your father was so aggressive. I couldn’t take it anymore, Eddie. I had to go—”

“I didn’t ask why you left. I asked why you didn’t come back. Even after he was arrested, you stayed away. Not even so much as a fucking postcard.”

She sighed as her eyes fell, trying to find the best way to answer his question. 

“Originally, I wanted to get things ready before you came to live with me. Eddie when I moved, those first few months I was practically making pennies as a waitress living in a studio apartment. I thought you would be better with Wayne. When I finally got settled, I guess that idea remained imprinted in my brain; that you would be happier with your uncle.”

The metalhead folded his arms across his chest as he glared at her. 

“Mom, I would have rather lived with you in a box on the street then anywhere with dad. You have no idea what he put me through.”

“I have some idea.”

“You. Have. No. Idea.”, he snarled. “I was a 10-year-old kid and you were a grown woman who knew what he would do to me if you left. Hell he hit me in front of you all the fucking time!”

“If I could go back in time and make a different decision I would! I don’t know what else I can say!”

“He doesn’t want you to say anything. He wants you to listen and understand.”, you cut in trying to be helpful.

“This is a family matter! I don’t know why you two are even here!”

“BECAUSE SHE IS MY FAMILY!”, Eddie roared causing his mother to lean back. “I love her. If I could marry her right now and give her my last name I would. She’s been there for me and actually sees me for me. To her I’m not ‘that Munson kid’. I’ve always just been Eddie.”

He gestures towards Steve. “This man is my best fucking friend and saved my life. Without him I wouldn’t even fucking be here. I love him like a brother and we take care of each other like we are.”

Eddie points past her towards his uncle. “Wayne took me in when YOU and Allen abandoned me. Even before you disappeared, I only ever felt safe with him. He’s raised me and not only taken care of me but these two as well when their parents abandoned them. Y/N’s lucky. Her parents admitted their mistakes and apologized for them. Steve and I don’t know what that’s fucking like. So, I guess the real point is, if this is a ‘family matter’ then you shouldn’t be here.”

Thunder clapped loudly as the power went out in the trailer.

“Shit. I don’t think anyone is going anywhere tonight. “, Wayne sighed. “Let’s, um, let’s call it a night yeah? Kids why don’t you take Eddie’s bedroom—”

“No. She can take my bedroom and we can sleep out here. If you still have that inflatable mattress.”, the man grumbled. 

***

You guys didn’t even need the mattress. Steve was the only one who was currently on it while you and Eddie were on the couch. He didn’t say much through the rest of the evening, just held you to his chest till you fell as sleep in his arms. As he sat there playing with your hair and gently caressing your legs, through the darkness in the living room he could just barely make out a figure headed for the front door. 

“You should have used my bedroom window. Lord knows I used that a bunch.”, he sighed as he used his lighter to light a candle near him, illuminating his mom’s face. 

“I, uh,…”

“No, no. I get it. I’ll tell them it was family emergency or something.”

Her eyes scanned him over softly as he continued to pet your hair behind your head. 

“She seems like a nice girl. Obviously loves you.”

“Yeah. She’s perfect…to me anyway.” His mother came around and took a seat on the other side of the sofa. “For that first year, I used to be terrified that she would leave me like you did. Now as I get older, sometimes I fear I’ll become like dad. Like there’s some dormant Munson gene that will snap into place at some point. Steve won’t say it out loud but I know he’s worried about the same thing…him becoming a prick like his father.”

“Eddie, you’re nothing like Allen.”

“Then why didn’t you come back for me?”

“Edward Munson, that had nothing to do with you. I swear on my life I never once thought you’d turn into him.”, she sighs as she leans back. “When you were a baby you always looked at me with these expressive eyes like you were taking in every little thing. Even when you got older… the night before I left, you gave me those same eyes but they were sadder. I felt like that was my fault. I brought you into this situation… he was hurting me and I was hurting you.”

“When I settled, I told myself I would send for you. Hell, I would even come and get you myself. When your grandma, my mom, told me Allen was arrested and you were with Wayne… that way you used to look at me flashed through my head. I thought ‘Maybe he’s better off with his uncle.”

“You could have sent me a letter at least or called…”

“I thought this was the best choice, Eddie. I genuinely did. I thought with me and your father out of your life now you can live yours to the fullest. I had no idea Allen had you alone after I left.”

Eddie nodded as he looked away, the gesture causing you to wake. You didn’t move or make any indication when you heard his mother’s voice.

“Eddie, I’m so sorry for what you went through. I really am. I’m not asking you to forgive me but whenever you’re ready I’d love to be a part of your life. Maybe you can come visit me…meet the kids.”

“Do they know about me?”

“Yeah and so does my husband. He’s, um, a bit of nerd but—” They both laugh and your heart explodes for him. “I’ll, um, let you get some sleep.” She pats his leg before standing and heading back towards his room. 

“Are you alright?”, you ask as you caress his face. 

“Hey. How long have you been awake?”

“Not long. What about you, Steve?”

“Jesus, woman. How did you know?”, the man rolls over to turn and face you both making you giggle. 

“I sleep beside you, remember? I know what you look like asleep.”

“Pfft. Yeah, she woke me up when I heard her shoes heading for the door.”

“So, us fucking doesn’t wake you up but my mom’s shoes did?”

“I’m on high alert, Munson. Like you said…” Steve sits up and pulls his knees to his bare chest. “We’re family. I don’t just protect her but you to, man.”

“Thanks, Harrington.”, Eddie smiles. “Yeah, baby, to answer your question. I’m alright.” 

You softly smile back at him when he kisses your forehead. 

“Come on. Let’s lay down.” Sliding off him, you take his hand and lead him down to the inflatable bed.

“You look really sexy in this by the way.”, he playfully whispers as he lightly tugs at the long, oversized shirt Wayne gave you to sleep in. After taking off his own shirt, he slid in beside you and Steve did the same. His uncle had had given them both shorts to sleep but the material was relatively flimsy. Both their cocks pressed against you and you couldn’t help licking your lips at the feeling. 

“Sir?” He answered you with a soft him as he pressed his nose to your cheek. “You can use me right now if you need to. I don’t mind. I know you’ve been through a lot today.” As you whisper your last sentence, his eyes open to look at yours, vaguely making them out in the dark. 

“You’ve already done a lot for me these past few days, sweetheart.”

“I know. I also know that when you both feel out of control…controlling me makes you feel better.” A heavy breath escapes his lips as your nose grazes his. “And you know I definitely don’t mind that.”

“You’d have to be very quiet, baby girl. We also know that when we fuck you rough like that you get loud.”, Steve tuts.

“I can be quiet, Daddy. I promise.”

“I don’t want to be rough. Not like that anyway…”

“Uh oh.” You place your palm on his forehead, feeling his smile stretch against your cheek. “Are you dying?”

Taking a hold of your wrist, he wraps your arm around his neck as his free hand pushes down his shorts to release his cock from their hold and you lift your leg, moaning lightly when he runs his mushroom tip along the fabric of your underwear blocking your core.

“Hey. When we first met you even you admitted sometimes you like it vanilla.”

“If there’s one thing you aren’t, baby, it’s vanilla.”, you cooed, repeating those words he said to you that first night back to him. 

Moving your underwear to the side, you both whimper as he slides into your entrance. His palm took hold of your thigh just below the back of your knee as he held it steady in the air. While he pumped into you at gentle but firm pace, he continually whispered things in your ear in a low, husky tone that had you clenching around him as you turned your head into the sound of his voice. 

“I love you, Y/N, so much. I love that you’re ours, baby. Fuck… not just because of how good this fucking pussy feels but because—mmm—you take care of us to. You love us for us. Tell me that you love me, princess.”

“I love you, Sir. Shit…just like that, baby, please.”

His hair brushes against your face as he shakes his head and thrusts his hips a bit harder into yours causing you to cling to the other boy’s wrist that was occasionally bumping into your side as he stroked his cock while he listened to you moan and whimper.

“Me… sweetheart. Tell me that you love me…please…”

You wished you could see his face better as you gripped his cheek and kissed his lips. Your thumb caressed along his features as you told him what he needed to hear. 

“I love you, Eddie Munson. Yes, baby. I belong to you, Eddie. It’s been a while since I’ve said that but I’ve never forgotten. Mmm! I’m yours. I’ll always be here for you. Always.” 

His breath warmed your face as he picked up his rhythm, hitting that spot inside of you that had you melting into him. Steve reached for your hand, running his tongue along your palm, and placed it around his length that throbbed in your grasp. You kissed his lips as the metalhead lightly bit into the area between your neck and shoulder, grunting when he felt your pussy flutter around him as you came.

Eddie clung to your body chasing his release until you mewled as he warmed your insides. The other boy quickly rose to his knees, stroking his cock till he came on your tummy. 

In the dark, he reached for your hand and both boys guided you into the bathroom. Just like old times, Steve hopped onto the counter while, Eddie got the shower started. Cupping his face in your hands, you leaned forward to tenderly kiss his lips. 

“I love you to, Steve Harrington. I’m yours and I’ll always be here for you.”, you whisper before he smiles and kisses you again. 

#############

“Hey Lynn. Good to see you’re still here.”, Wayne grinned sassily before handing her a cup of coffee.

She offers him a half smile and a polite thank you as she takes the cup from his hands. 

“Definitely a unique situation, huh?”, she asks as she gestures to where you three were sleeping. 

“I think what makes it more unique is that it’s genuine at such a young age. They’ve been really good for each other. When Steven started coming over, that’s when Eddie started getting out of his shell a bit more. Then they met Y/N and everything went up from there.”

“He said her parents were the only one to approve?”

“Not at first but after about a month they came around. Bill on the other hand…”

“Bill was always an asshole.”

“Yeah but I didn’t think he’d stoop so low as to call a young girl a whore who brainwashed his son.” He nodded when her eyes widened. “Oh, yeah. Don’t worry. Her father punched him in the face.”

“Good. Fuck him.” They both chuckled as they drank their beverages. 

After you guys woke up, Wayne made breakfast while casual conversation was made with Eddie telling his mother all things you three had done together like your trip to New York and the prom they had created for you. As the afternoon came to a close, Lynn had to leave and the metalhead walked her to her car while you and Steve hung back. 

“I’ll call you when I land and we can set up a time for you three to come visit.”, she grins.

Without a word, Eddie leans forward to hug her and you smile as you watch her circle her arms around him as she holds him tightly to her tiny frame.

***

“I stole this from your room.”, you announce as you hand the Wizard of Oz book to Eddie who was leaning outside of his window in your apartment smoking. “Your uncle said it was like your security blanket.”

“Shit. Yeah it was. I didn’t even realize I left it.

Steve came up behind you, taking you in his arms and resting his chin on your head as you leaned against him. 

“Why that book?”, he asked.

“It was the first book I remember my mother reading to me. It’s also the first time I remember my dad coming home drunk screaming about some mundane shit. It was nice being able to disappear into a fantasy land for a time. As I got older, I guess it just…made me feel safe.”

His eyes glance towards you both before flipping absently through the pages. 

“When my mom left I would read it to myself especially during those first six months. Allen was, uh, really ruthless.”

Eddie spent the rest of the evening opening up to you and Steve about what happened to him. When he finished, he seemed so much lighter as if a weight had been lifted from his chest. You made him dinner while they both played some fighting game on the expensive console they saved up for.  When we went to bed that night he held you tightly to his side while he played with your hair. 

“Y/N?” You answered with a soft hm to which he responded by tenderly kissing your forehead. “Thank you.”

###########

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[enbylestat]

Tidings of comfort & joy

Chapters: 12/12 Fandom: The Wicked Years Series - Gregory Maguire Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Elphaba Thropp/Fiyero Tigelaar, Fiyero Tigelaar/Sarima Tigelaar, Elphaba Thropp/Sarima Tigelaar, elphaba thropp/sarima tigelaar/fiyero tigelaar Characters: Elphaba Thropp, Fiyero Tigelaar, Sarima Tigelaar, Galinda Upland, The Wizard (The Wicked Years), Liir (The Wicked Years), Nor "Ilianora" Tigelaar, Manek Tigelaar, Irji Tigelaar Additional Tags: Holidays, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Lurlinemas (The Wicked Years), Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Character Study, Anarchy, Fascism, Politics, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-Typical Behavior, polyamorous Fiyero Tigelaar, bisexual Fiyero Tigelaar, Bisexual Elphaba Thropp, Bisexuality, Bisexual Female Character, Bisexual Male Character, Useless Lesbians, lesbian Glinda Upland, Revolution, Inspired by Roleplay/Roleplay Adaptation, Tumblr Roleplay, Inspired by A Christmas Carol, Bisexual Female Character of Color, POV Alternating, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, POV Third Person, POV Third Person Limited, References to Wicked - Schwartz/Holzman, References to Wicked (The Wicked Years), Song: God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, Fix-It, Happy Ending, Polyamory, rairpair, Threesome - F/F/M, Canon - Book, Historical References, Allegory, Femslash, Smut, Intersex, Queer Themes, POV Elphaba Thropp, POV Fiyero Tigelaar, POV Sarima Tigelaar, Minor Elphaba Thropp/Galinda Upland, Character Death, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Religion, Atheism Series: Part 5 of The Wicked Years (enbylestat's version). Summary: Post the violent (and justified) overthrow of Oscar Diggs - the ‘Wonderful’ Wizard of Oz, and the ascension of an extremely reluctant Glinda Upland-Chuffrey, Elphaba Thropp, who is already on the way to the Vinkus makes a life for herself in a way that is on solid ground and one she, Sarima and Fiyero Tigelaar all deserve.

(AU: no one dies / everyone lives, fluff with light smut.)

@creators-club

[srovtl]

(in here, a magic that connect hearts) Rutile SSR Card Story Translation

Translator note: This, and all the fifth anniversary card stories, reference each character’s affection story (which can be read here) and I recommend reading them beforehand.

What will you write in the report card - Episode 1

Akira: I'm looking forward to tasting Nero's cake. 

Rutile: Yeah. I'm getting hungry now.

(Crashing sound)

Akira, Rutile: Whoa!?

Akira: I-I just heard a loud noise...

Rutile: It's from outside, right? …..ah.

Bradley: I'm gonna blow your head right off!

Mithra: That is impossible. I'll kill you before that happens.

Looking out the window, Bradley and Mithra were fighting in the air with magical tools in their hands.

Bradley:《Adnopotence》

Mithra:《Arthim》

Gunshots rang out in the blue sky, and a giant ghost-like thing flew around in the sky.

Akira: (It's a familiar sight, but... it's still bad for my heart every time...!)

Meanwhile, gazing up at the same scene, Rutile leisurely smiled.

Rutile: Mister Mithra, you're in high spirits today too. Mister Bradley too.

Akira: Eh... I think that long surpassed the level of high energy?

Rutile: But that's just how Mithra and the Wizards of the North are. It's the same as me being carefree and Master Sage being kind.

Rutile smiled softly, as if watching over his students.

Rutile: Fighting is certainly scary. But if Mister Mithra and the others stopped fighting, wouldn't that be a bit worrying?

Akira: That's...certainly true...

Akira: Wha...?!

The impact shook the magic manor. The two's quarrel had not subsided, but rather became even more heated.

Akira: Snow and White are out, and Oz is away on a mission. We really had to stop them...!

Rutile: You're right. It's about time we called out to them.

Rutile opened the window and leaned out.

Rutile: Mister Mithra, Mister Bradley!

Mithra: Rutile?

Bradley: Ah!? Stay out of the way, you bastard!

Rutile: Sorry for interrupting your fight! Would you like a snack?

Mithra: …….

Mithra: Snacks?

Rutile: Mister Nero baked a cake using a new recipe.

Rutile: We're going to go try it now, and I was wondering if you two would like to join me.

Mithra: …….Now that I think of it, I'm a little hungry.

Bradley: What? Where are you going?!

With Bradley's yelling behind him, Mithra came flying in without a word. He swerved over the window frame and entered the hallway.

Bradley: Hey! ….hah…

Akira: (Ah... Bradley flew away. I guess the fight is over...)

Mithra: What kind of cake is it? Venison?

Rutile: It's an orange cake. Apparently they got a lot of fresh oranges at the market.

Rutile speaks with a cheerful voice, as cheerful as a spring breeze. Even though he has interrupted a northern wizard's fight, he doesn't seem shaken.

Akira: (Rutile is a young and energetic wizard, but maybe because he's a school teacher, he's more aware of these things than his age would suggest.)

Akira: (Come to think of it, I thought something similar when I interviewed him before…)

What will you write in the report card - Episode 2

A few days later, I happened to pop into the lounge...

Chloe: Rutile...

Mitile: nii-sama...

Chloe, Mitile: We're sorry!

Rutile: ……

Akira: (Huh? Chloe and Mitile are apologizing profusely to Rutile...?)

Akira: Umm, you three. Did something happen?

Chloe: Master Sage! You see, we were messing around and knocked over a glass...

Mitile: We spilled juice on the picture nii-sama was drawing...

When I looked at Rutile's hands, I saw orange splashes splashing all over the corner of the picture he was working on.

Chloe: I'm so sorry!

Mitile: I'm sorry, nii-sama!

As the two of them apologized profusely, Rutile frowned dramatically.

Rutile: I'm soo angry. You two are going to be punished.

Rutile: As a punishment... you have to draw with me!

Chloe, Mitile: ….!

Rutile: Now, bring the tools from my room. And two glasses of juice. One for the one you spilled, and one for Master Sage.

Mitile: Yes! Of course!

Chloe: I'm off now!

Rutile: Have a nice trip!

Rutile sent them off with a smile as they hurriedly left.

Akira: ...Um, Rutile. You're not actually angry, are you?

Rutile: Yeah. Not at all.

Akira: Then why did you punish them?

Rutile: I don't mind a stain this small, but Mitile and Chloe will probably be bothered by it.

Rutile: They're both kind, but when they're depressed, they tend to hold it in, so I thought it would be better for them to be properly punished so they could move on with a clear mind.

Akira: (It was a way of dealing with them that suited their personalities... He's really a teacher after all.)

Rutile: They were apologizing profusely, but I'm happy about this stain.

Rutile: The fact that they messed around and screwed up was proof that they had become close.

Looking down at the painting, Rutile smiled, embracing it. The way he looked at the newly formed stain was endlessly warm, like the sunlight.

But his clear eyes were not only kind, but also intelligent and fair.

Akira: (...I wonder what the magic manor looks like from Rutile's point of view.)

Akira: (I'd like to know how the magic manor looks through Rutile's eyes, like having a teacher write a report card.)

Akira: (I was also thinking about updating the contents of the sage's manual a bit…)

Akira: Rutile, I have a request.

Akira: I'd like to interview you again to write in the sage's manual. Is that okay?

Rutile: An interview? Of course, I'd be happy to.

Rutile: : How about tonight? I'll be waiting for you in my room.

What will you write in the report card - Episode 3

Rutile: Here you go. It's my favorite tea these days.

Akira: Thank you. Wow, what a nice smell...

Rutile: Hehe. It was like this in the last interview too.

Akira: That brings back memories. Even back then, I was really impressed by Rutile's kindness and strength.

Akira: It's been a while since then, and the Magic manor has changed a little, hasn't it?

Akira: That's why I wanted to know what Rutile thinks about the current manor.

Akira: In my world, there is a "report card" where teachers would give comments about your daily life, so that's how it feels...

Rutile: I see, that's the teacher's role. Well, I'll have to do my best!

Rutile: About the current magic manor...Hmmm...

Rutile: …………………..

Akira: ...Rutile? S-sorry, it's hard to answer right away.

Rutile: Ah. No, it's not that.

Rutile: I just thought about it a lot, and in the end, I think it comes down to "love".

Rutile shook his bright, sun-colored hair and laughed, as if ticklish.

Rutile: There are all kinds of people at the magic manor, so there are fights, people getting too excited, and all kinds of things happen every day.

Rutile: It's \the manor is always being turned upside down, it's always messy and disorganized, and things aren't going well...

Rutile: But that's why I cherish the time I spend here, and I love everyone who has shared that time with me.

Akira: Rutile...

My heart feels warm.

A lot has happened since I came here. We've clashed, stumbled, been hurt, helped each other, shared...

It felt like everything, all of it, made me smile. All of it was what we needed.

Akira: ….Thank you for your wonderful answer. I feel the same way as Rutile.

Rutile: Really? I'm so happy!

Rutile: But, since I'm here, I'd like to hear it in your own words, Master Sage.

Rutile: Master Sage, what do you think about the current state of the magic manor?

Looking at me with excited jade eyes, I think and try to find the words.

Akira: Ummm… There are many difficult things, but I love you all, even with all that.

Akira: ...And I hope that everyone who chose to remain here as a sage's wizard feels the same way...

Akira: That's why I was so happy when Rutile said that to me earlier.

Rutile: Master Sage...

Rutile smiled slowly, dazzlingly, and took my hand.

Rutile: I'll say it again and again. I love this place, all of you, Master Sage.

Rutile: Please write that in your report card in the sage's manual.

Akira: ...Yes, I'll write it down!

I nodded vigorously and shook Rutile's hand.

I hope that we will continue to make many more wonderful memories, like a stain on a painting.

I can only say because it’s now - Card Episode

Akira: Rutile, thank you for answering the interview for the sage's manual the other day.

Akira: It's not really a continuation of what we did back then, but is there anything you can tell me because it's now?

Rutile: Hmm. I say what I think right away, so I can't really think of anything.

Rutile: Oh, that's right. On the other hand, is there anything you would like to say, Master Sage? Something you can say to me because it's now.

Akira: Huh? Hmm, let's see… it's not  really because it's now but...

Akira: When I first met you, I thought you were a fragile type based on your overall vibe.

Rutile: Huh! Really? I've never been told that in my hometown. Maybe it's because we've all known each other since we were little?

Rutile: ...But I guess I'm fragile...

Rutile: ...Nice to meet you, Master Sage.

Akira: Oh! That was exactly the image I had in mind!

Rutile: Really? I was making an impression of Heath just now. I'll keep it up.

Rutile: My favorite thing is rain!

Rutile: Oh no. I'm too energetic.

Rutile: Something more like, pretty and gentle... Elegant, Rain…

Rutile: What do you think, Master Sage?

Akira: Perfect! ephemeral!

Rutile: Yay! I got the Sage's "ephemeral"!

Akira: (Contrary to my first impression, I really like how energetic and easy going he is…)

Homescreen voiceline

Promises are chains that can restrict our lives, but at the same time, I want to believe that they can be something that enriches our lives. I will do my best to make that a believable reality.

[pineapplehazard]

8x04 spoilers!!

Aaaaah i loved it, the whole thing!! I missed the silly interventions!!!!

- Henren : I'm so glad that Mara can finally go home to her moms and her brother!!!! (yes I saw the promo for ep5, but I'm gonna live in denial until next week (: ). Though I gotta say, why did they go outside with Madney and Mara that was such a stupid move 😐 (sorry).

- Gerrard: i do not consider this a redemption arc but shit, without him we wouldn't be where we are. I'm mad that he got an ending that is also satisfying for him, he SO doesn't deserves it!!!eurgh. The real reason everyone (mostly) is back where they belong is thanks to Bobby manipulating him but still, Gerrard shouldn't have a ending that he is pleased with eurgh.

Also how could Bobby do that to Brad? 😔💔 *sad british noises in the background*

- Buck : you perfect, intelligent man that you are giving Bobby a scare with the 'Little buddy' part of your bobby-therapy-session.....

- Chimney : looked so great, is so great, I love chimney, and it shouldn't but him with the gun did it for me!!

- Bobby and Athena : love that they're gonna rebuild, they could have had this idea around three months before though cause now they're gonna stay in that apartment for a little while longer... Also, I love Bobby being in love with Athena (and Athena with Bobby), they're adorable I love them

- Edmundo Diaz : first, I will never agree with Bobby on that mustache, I really really really appreciate it,, SO MUCH

Second, the angst is coming can you all feel it? I mean it's here already but a mountain of angst is building. Everyone's problems got resolved this episode, except for Eddie's one (and they couldn't resolve it so soon so that's normal but) meaning that at the end of the day, while The Wilsons and Hans were celebrating, and Athena and Bobby finally solved their house problem, (and Buck was... Idk ? Free of Gerrard? Can't really think of something here), and Wes and his father reunited.... Eddie went home and it was still just an empty house, because Chris is still in Texas and barely talking to him

So what if my heart broke when Wes called him Dad? Cause that's maybe the first time he's heard someone calling him that in a while...

On another note, I was worried he would go full Maddie-stalking-style with Wes' dad at first, maybe that's just because my brain loves finding parallels between Eddie and Maddie... Anyway, the whole talk with the dad about absent fathers, stupid masculinity stuff, and all. That was great.

'Masks' PROMO SPOILERS (i'm gonna try to stay evasive)

CAN'T WE LET THEM HAVE PEACE FOR AT LEAST ONE EPISODE??? ONE?? THAT'S SO F UP!!

Also I know it makes sense for ep4 to be 'No Place Like Home' but when next episode you have characters dressed like the Wizard of Oz's characters... Idk it feels like a miss, it doesn't sit well in my mind🤷‍♀️

If a 'friend od Dorothy' reference is made somehow throughout the episode I might combust

Also it feels weird that we got the synopsis so long before the airing and the synopsis focused a lot on Buck, when clearly the promo shows where focus might actually be... Bc when we have storyline like the one shown in the promo, usually you don't have to much time to put another character's storyline in focus in it. So Buck was probably to throw us, and he's just gonna be like believing there's ghosts or something like that...

Can't wait to know more about ep6 too!! The release date, stuff like that, I'm hyped!!

[justanenderman]

Memories of a Life Never Lived

A spark burst from the faulty wiring that hung down from the ceiling above Fiddleford’s head. He felt the bite of the spark on the nape of his neck.

He brushed it away, the sensation only breaking his focus momentarily.

He was too focused on recalibrating his memory device meant to erase and rearrange memories.

It didn’t quite work yet. He had tested it out on a few gnomes in the area. It turned the gnomes feral and initiated a hostile attack.

It had been four months since he’d left Palo Alto. He hadn’t seen his wife Emma-May or his son Tate in that span of time. He would call them daily, of course, but it wasn’t the same as seeing them in person.

He could always leave. The reason he was in that backwoods town was now a fleeting effort.

The portal wasn’t working. His lab partner Stanford was still in denial that it wasn’t. He begged Fiddleford to stay and help. But Fiddleford wasn’t sure if any of it was worth it.

And even worse - Fiddleford had found himself getting sentimental over Stanford. He hesitated to leave, but not because of the project. He would miss Stanford if he left.

It was conflicting. He wanted to see his family again, but he also didn’t want to disappoint Ford.

There was also a confusing sensation that rushed through him whenever Ford got too close. It was a magnetic force that wanted him to get closer. Fiddleford had never thought he would experience attraction to a man - but this wasn’t just emotional. It was a physical pull, much like the moon and the Earth’s tides.

Was it romantic? He was unsure. It could be a result from being stuck underground in a lab for nearly half a year. It could be from the desperate need to hold his wife again.

But whatever it was, he was sure that Ford didn’t feel the same way in return. He was odd. He didn’t seem to have any ability to feel anything but determination.

There were a lot of things Fiddleford despised about Ford. He had a tendency of making very poor decisions that put both of their lives at risk. He always attracted some sort of peril everywhere they went.

And lately, he had an obsession with the demonic. That was what made Fiddleford feel uneasy.

Despite everything, though, he stayed. He worked in that lab for hours and slept in a spare bedroom inside of Ford’s house. He was sure he had some form of radiation poisoning from the portal they had been constructing all those months. But if he were to finish it, he would be the most acclaimed genius for centuries. He’d be bigger than Einstein, Tesla, even Socrates.

He wanted to be a man that Tate could be proud of.

Once he had adjusted the dial on the memory gun, he made sure to reload the canister in the gauge so he could test it on the gnomes again.

But when he stood up to head into the woods, he heard the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs.

Usually Fiddleford could identify Ford’s footsteps. They were heavy, slow and had a consistent pace down each step.

But these sounded different. They were quicker and had no rhythm. It sounded as if he was jumping down each step.

But sure enough, Ford entered the lab with a smile on his face.

It was dark in the lab, so it was hard to tell exactly what he was feeling.

Fiddleford hid the ray behind his back. He didn’t want Ford to know he was working on it again.

“Ah, hello Stanford…I didn’t know you’d be back here so soon,” he said, referring to Ford claiming he would be exploring caves in the woods on his own.

Ford approached him, “It began to storm. I figured it would be safer down here, with you.” he replied. He was barely audible. His voice was soft and low.

Fiddleford tucked the memory ray into his waistband behind his back. He stepped away towards his desk.

“Oh, a storm? Then, yes, I suppose it is safer down here.” he said with a nervous chuckle.

Ford got even closer, “I bet you had a lot of severe storms growing up in Tennessee, huh? Like in Wizard of Oz. That was in Tennessee, right?” he asked, still hardly speaking above a whisper.

“Kansas, actually…” he felt Ford’s hands grab onto his waist and push him backwards into the desk. His breath escaped his lungs with his voice. The end of his vocals cracked into a high-pitched noise.

Fiddleford gasped, startled and worried Ford was going to find the memory ray. He reached behind him and tried to grab it, but Ford took his hand.

“I know what you’ve been hiding from me,” he said.

“Y-You…you do?” Fiddleford croaked. His forehead was covered in beads of sweat and his stomach turned. He wasn’t sure how Ford would react if he confessed.

“Yes…” Ford took a hold of his shirt collar and backed him into the wall.

He flinched, “Okay, I-I know I said I wasn’t going to work on it anymore, b-but you don’t understand! This could have a big impact on-“ Fiddleford’s running thoughts were cut short when Ford grabbed his face and pressed his lips against his own.

Fiddleford’s first instinct was to pull away, but he was frozen. He hummed in surprise against Ford’s mouth and couldn’t think of what to do.

The sensation was something he craved. He hadn’t realized how much he missed this.

He grabbed onto Ford’s shoulders and leaned into the kiss. Ford’s lips were cold and tasted of something wooden. They were dry, but it didn’t matter to Fiddleford.

His mind still raced, but with new thoughts.

Why was Ford doing this? And why did he like it? Was he really so desperate for affection that he’d kiss his own colleague?

Then, there was something more. Another layer that sent a rush of nerves and excitement through Fiddleford.

As they’d kept their lips together, Ford yanked at Fiddleford’s trench coat and pulled it off. Underneath was his polo. Ford undid the buttons on it.

Fiddleford didn’t resist. He inhaled sharply with each touch. He became lost and dazed in his feelings and forgot who he had been married to. He forgot at that moment that this was not his wife. It didn’t register that this was his professional work partner…a former classmate. All he wanted was to be touched by someone. He needed it.

But something in the back of his mind told him that something felt wrong.

Ford’s skin was very hot to the touch. His face, his arms, his chest. It felt like he had a very high fever.

Then, there was the fact that his voice was off. His whispers sounded strained and raspy. It was not as he sounded that morning.

Then, the realization struck him and his heart immediately skipped a beat.

Oh…oh, God!!!

Immediately he tore himself away from Ford’s face and looked into his eyes. They were shielded beneath his glasses, which had a tint in the lenses.

Fiddleford took them off and his fears were confirmed.

The whites of Ford’s eyes were a neon yellow color. The waterline was irritated and red. His pupils were stretched into thin, cat-like slits.

He knew what was wrong.

The demonic “muse” Ford had been conspiring with had taken over his body.

Fiddleford exclaimed in surprise and pushed the body away from him. It was heavier than usual.

“No! No! Oh, my god!” Fiddleford cried, clutching his chest and trying not to faint from terror. He grabbed the nearest sharp object and started swinging at the demon.

“Don’t come near me! Stay away! Y-you goddamn…hellspawn!”

They let out a harsh, high-pitched cackle. They laughed so loud and so forcefully that they began to foam at the mouth.

“Wow! You really are desperate for your wife, huh? I’ve never kissed anyone so needy before!” the demon said boastfully.

Fiddleford growled in anger and tossed a book at them. It hit them in the nose, but they hardly reacted.

“H-How dare you come to me and violate me like this?! You’re sick!” Fiddleford cried.

“Oh, please! You were so into it! We would have gotten to third base if your senses hadn’t finally kicked in. It took you exactly 17.6 seconds to realize! That’s how much you enjoyed it!” the demon claimed.

Fiddleford sputtered. His face was hot. His body trembled. He was full of so many emotions and didn’t know what to do.

“This was me trying to get rid of you! I thought if I made a move on you, you’d be out of here before Sixer could even wake up! But oh, man! That was just pitiful! You’re so horny that you’d go down on your work partner? Stanford Pines? The guy’s barely a functioning person!” said the demon.

His voice was shrill and echoed off the walls, “Let’s be real, Eyeglasses! You never should have come here in the first place. You should have just stayed back in Palo Alto with your little domestic housewife and nuclear family dynamic. I mean, that little display alone proves it! So why don’t you run along and leave me and Stanford to do this on our own, huh? Come on…”

Fiddleford gritted his teeth, balled up his fists, and sighed, “You’re right. Maybe I shouldn’t have come. I guess Stanford doesn’t need me anymore…” he slowly reached into his waistband and grabbed onto the memory ray, “I guess then I should just…pack up and-“ he cocked the gun and aimed it right at the demon, “Get out of his body! Get out! Or I’ll make you!”

The demon scoffed, “I’m not scared of that thing. It doesn’t even work!”

Fiddleford pulled the trigger and a beam of energy went right towards him. The demon yelped and ducked, the beam grazing the top of their head and leaving the ends of their hair seared off.

“Geez! Alright, alright! So dramatic…” the demon finally relented.

Then, with the light whoosh of a triangular shadow, Ford’s body slumped over and collapsed to the ground.

Fiddleford still couldn’t catch a full breath. He panted heavily and set the gun down, the feeling to sob too strong to ignore.

You let him manipulate you like that?!

Imagine if your mama found out!

Adulterer! You’re doomed to hellfire!

Emma is gonna find out and she’ll leave you!

You’d better pray for forgiveness.

But a man who commits adultery has no sense; whoever does so destroys himself. Proverbs 6:32

His own internal voice chided at him in his head.

Tears streamed down his face as he stormed up the staircase into the upper floors of the house, then went to his bedroom and slammed the door. He buried his face in his sheets and cried himself to sleep.

Part 2

The next morning, Stanford awoke with a pounding headache and terrible nausea. This was typical after Bill took over his body.

He sat up and tried to swallow down the contents of his stomach, at least until he could make it to a toilet.

When he got to the top of the staircase, the light coming through the windows caused him to wince. Another wave of nausea passed through him.

He made a dash to the bathroom and vomited. His temples pulsed as he coughed and hacked.

That damn triangle… he thought.

He finally cleaned himself up and got changed into different clothes that weren’t three days old, then headed into the kitchen. After expelling everything in his stomach, he was left feeling famished.

In the kitchen brewing coffee was Fiddleford. Once Ford had entered the room, his face turned white.

“Morning, McGucket. Are you okay?” Ford questioned, noticing his change in demeanor.

McGucket couldn’t speak. He quickly nodded his head and swallowed. His throat was dry.

He averted his gaze. Something that did give him relief was seeing that Ford looked normal.

He kept his head down and focused on stirring his coffee.

Ford cleared his throat and poured his own cup of coffee. The both of them stood facing opposite sides of the kitchen.

Fiddleford stared into his cup and watched the liquid slosh around inside of it. He drummed his fingers on the countertop anxiously. He didn’t know if Stanford was playing dumb, or if he genuinely didn’t remember what had happened.

“Why’d you let Cipher do what he did?” Fiddleford blurted out. He regretted it instantly.

“Do what? Oh, God, what is it now???” Ford questioned. He sounded alarmed and fearful.

“I was in the lab. You came downstairs. You got closer and closer and then…suddenly we were kissing.” Fiddleford recounted the confusing swirl of events that left him full of questions.

Ford grimaced and slammed his cup on the countertop. Fiddleford noticed the coffee in his cup ripple in waves against the vibrations.

“Dammit! Really?” Ford exclaimed.

“Yes. Really.” McGucket confirmed.

Ford wasn’t just mad. He wasn’t just ashamed. He was appalled and enraged. He wanted to do something to let go of his anger but wasn’t sure how.

“God, F. I am so sorry. I really am so sorry.” Ford said, still fuming. He started to walk out of the kitchen with his coffee cup, “I’ll leave you be. You probably can’t look at me right now.”

“No,” Fiddleford stated, “Stay. I want to talk about it.”

Ford paused and turned back around.

The two of them sat at the kitchen table with their coffees.

Fiddleford drummed on the table anxiously.

“So, Bill Cipher kissed me. But…before I realized it was him, I thought it was you. And, well…I sort of liked it. I don’t know if it’s homesickness, or cabin fever…but I just accepted the fact I was being kissed.” Fiddleford explained

Ford glanced back at him, his eyebrows raised.

“You liked it…” he repeated, breathless, “Never would have expected that…”

Fiddleford’s face turned hot, his cheeks flushing pink.

“I-I just…missed the feeling, I guess. I was utterly confused, of course, and I was wondering what was wrong with you. I knew you’d never do something like that. So…finding out it was Cipher made a lot more sense. It was just a lot for me to take in. It made me feel like a fool.” said McGucket, stirring his coffee into a whirlpool. He watched the liquid spin in a winding pattern against the teaspoon.

He glanced up at Ford slightly, and there was a light smirk on his face. Fiddleford couldn’t tell if it was teasing or bashful. But neither of them said anything for several seconds.

“Why feel like a fool? It’s not your fault. Bill’s an asshole. He just wanted to freak you out to make you leave. But it didn’t. It only made you want to stay longer, huh?” Ford said.

“I-I…I guess so. Um, but, I really do miss my family. But I would feel guilty leaving you behind.” he stood up to put his saucer in the kitchen sink.

“We’ve been doing this project for so long, I just thought leaving in the midst of it would be wrong. But you’ve been spending so much time with that demon lately…sometimes I just feel sort of tossed aside. So I have considered going back. But since last night I’m not sure what to do.” he said.

Fiddleford turned from the sink to see Ford standing before him.

“Then, why not try it for real?” he mumbled, grabbing McGucket’s hand, “And see how you feel after that?”

Fiddleford felt the telltale warmth in his face again, the touch of Ford’s six fingers against his five making his stomach flutter. It was a strange sensation, but comforting.

McGucket grabbed the back of Ford’s head and brought his face into his.

Ford leaned up against Fiddleford on the countertop. They gazed into each other’s eyes briefly and knew they both had the same idea.

Fiddleford closed his eyes and locked lips with Ford. The real Stanford’s lips were so much softer and warm than the demon’s. His lips tasted of coffee. He felt the man sigh and his entire body relaxed, practically melting into the kiss. His body smelled of parchment and ink.

They continued to kiss for several seconds, their hands caressing each other’s hair and shoulders, until finally, they both let go.

Ford glanced back at him, nearly starry-eyed. He was awestruck.

“So, um…” Ford said quietly, his voice wavering, “How did that feel?

Fiddleford licked the lingering taste of Ford from his lips and smiled, “Still the same…I want to stay here with you.” he replied.

Ford smiled back, “I’m glad,” he replied.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

Don't know about divorce watch, but it does seem like their Diana arc is right on track. Those horribly awkward joint engagents that Charles and Diana did in the 80s, where they could barely contain their disdain for eachother... Uff! The latest CBS interview seems to be pretty much thesame thing. And for a change, I think this is genuinely the same.thimh, not just Diana cosplay.

There were a few years of this for Diana and Charles till it all came to a head. So if say another couple of years of this weird, awkward, barely contained resetment for them. The question is during the divorce who gets to do the Diana cosplay? Harry being her son, is the obvious conteder, and God knows, he has legit grounds to play the victim here. But Meghan, being Meghan, would probably put amber heardto shame.

That being said, do you think there is any credence to the billionaire boyfriend rumours? I just don't see her losing focus by getting a boytoy. Plus she looks too miserable and angry to be getting it on onthe side. If she was having an affair, she would have been able to put a better act with Harry. Her relationship with Cory was very rocky for nearly a year but she looked her best and acted so happy.

I think we need a tour with incredibly awkward, very visible "we're separated and not getting along" body language, like Charles and Diana in Korea. Don't get me wrong - the Sussexes' tours and foreign trips are cringe, but they're not cringe in a "divorce watch" kind of way. Not yet. Colombia could be it, though.

Whoever gets the Diana cosplay for the divorce (aka the victim edit) will be whoever files the paperwork and gets their story out first. But the caveat to that is also "whoever controls the narrative." For exactly the reason you mention - Amber Heard.

Amber intended to "win" the divorce with the victim edit and, for awhille, she was actually successful at it. Her mistake was the Washington Post editorial, which gave Johnny's team the opportunity to poke holes in a very public, very televised, very controlled way that eventually collapsed her narrative.

And this is 100% Meghan's blind spot. She loves editorializing how awful everything is, in interviews, op-eds, and books as an anonymous source. It's all but guaranteed that she will one day write something - or have something published that's attributed to her - that will give Harry's team something to use in a point-by-point rebuttal that turns her from victim to villain.

(I'm not worried about Harry having something in writing because, well, he doesn't write to begin with.)

Yes, her relationship with Cory was rocky but it looked much more stable than her marriage to Harry - and that's the power of illusion. I made a Wizard of Oz reference in an earlier post: "Pay no attention to the real lady behind the curtain, just worship the illusion that appears in front of you." That's applicable here too. With Cory, because that relationship was shown in public through Meghan's photographs and Meghan's stories on Meghan's blog, she controlled the illusion we saw; that they were stable and happy.

But with Harry, the curtain has been pulled back and we see the real relationship, warts and all. Their marriage is being shown in public through everyone else's photographs, everyone else's video footage, and everyone else's stories on everyone else's platform. Meghan can't control the illusion we see, so we see everything happening behind the curtain. That's why her platform includes censorship - so she can control what we see of her. That's why her tools include Sussex Squad and Christopher Bouzi - so she can control who says what, and what we say, of her.

As for the billionnaire rumors, I think it's just gossip. We know that she'll only leave Harry for something better, and the only thing that's better than him (according to her narcissm) is someone with a buttload of money who can finance her goals, aka billionnaires. But Meghan talks too much about money and private business for that to be attractive to billionnaires. Billionnaires don't talk publicly about money or their private business. Just look at Bezos and Lauren Sanchez - for as much as we see them in PR and as much as Lauren flaunts the relationship, she actually keeps her mouth shut about Bezos's money and his business. Meghan could never.

My feeling has always been that if there's a divorce, Meghan's next partner will be someone in tech. Tech is the only "industry" left that she hasn't tried (Trevor was acting, Cory was lifestyle and foodie, Harry was charity, society, and business. All that's left is tech and politics). Especially since in today's world, tech is the framework for almost everything. You want to get into content? You need tech. You want to be in media? You need tech. You want to be in politics? You need tech (big Tech is a huge donor and lobbyist in politics). You want to be in charity work? You need tech. You want money? It's all in tech.

Plus, there are dozens of centimillionnaires in/around tech than there are billionnaires in the world. It'll be so much easier for Meghan to meet, and get into a relationship with, one of those guys than it would be for her to get into the same room as a billionnaire.

(Just for the disclosure, since I am Rumor Tracking Anon, there's an astrologist who's seen Meghan marry a Middle Eastern billionnaire after leaving Harry. So it's not totally out of the question. I think it's implausible given everything, but never say never.)

[andy-wm]

Hello💜

I absolutely loved your SGMB analysis, & your pointers—they were brilliantly explained. I was especially impressed with how you broke down all of Jimin’s love interests in the “pantomime” being male…wow, how true! 🤯👨🏼‍🤝‍👨🏻🤩

A Twitter army @ renkinger_ talked about the overall aesthetics of the track video may be linked to the Wizard of Oz because Smeraldo flower originated in “La Città di smeraldo (Emerald City)” according to BH circa summer 2017. https://twitter.com/renkiger_/status/1806690417095942626?s=46&t=H01H2IYxpN8-BH-REKQ-hA Does the Wizard of Oz have any 🌈 lgbtq connotations I wonder…🤔

I also wanted to share two little things I’m speculating about SGMB:

• The song opens with marching band drums 🥁🥁 with “boop beep” like articulations—Do you think the “boop beep” may have been inspired by the Jimin meme where he is going “boop beep”? (I hope I’m explaining this sufficiently enough; there were two occasions JM did this 1️⃣ He made 🫶 and throws a kiss with 🤲 both hands at camera he had light hair, not exactly blonde. 2️⃣ In a Run BTS Hangul Day special episode whilst mocking/bickering at Yoongi, sounding vowels.)

• At the chorus 🎶mmm…I love you babe🎵 he goes 🎙️🐤 “Yesss I dooo~” in tiny. Do you think that could be another Jimin meme reference of that famous “Yes Aeey Dooo~👀” while seated with a guitar in green room during his FACE promo schedule?

Bangtan knows what we talk about them very well (“let’s talk about us”) on social media and beyond. Is it any wonder he might have incorporated some memes we adore?!

🌻🌻🌻🪻🥁🫧🐤🫧🥁🪻🌻🌻🌻

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️Oh hell yes!🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

The Wizard of Oz absolutely has links to queerness. The film has cult status among LGBT Folks.

The first thing that comes to mind is Friends of Dorothy, a euphemism for being gay.

The next thing is the fact that her friends - scarecrow, tin man, and cowardly lion - are all social outcasts.

You can read more on Wikipedia its very comprehensive

As for the memes (good spotting!) i think its highly likely he's seen them all. Considering what a playful MV this is and how many other references hes packed in (Serendipity bubble, butterfly, 👉 👈 etc) i dont see why it wouldn't be ... more tongue in cheekiness from our favourite Mochi 😁

(Apologies for the short answer, I am super tired!)

[marvelousmop]

The Mystery of John Burr the Chestnut Man

The Land of Oz is a series with many an obscure characters - most people could probably tell you about Dorothy, the Tin-Man, the Lion, and the Scarecrow, but how many know of Ozma? Or Tik-Tok? What of Professor H.M. Wogglebug T.E.? And that's just scratching the surface, considering there are so many books (around 40 considered "Canonical"), and then beyond that there are characters who pop up in works connected to Oz... and then there's the case of John Burr the Chestnut Man. Who the Hell is he?

Well, first, some context:

In the year 1900, L. Frank Baum published The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, complete with illustrations from W.W. Denslow. Due to their collaborative efforts on the book, it was agreed that both men should have the rights to the characters and various elements within the first book. This arrangement may sound a bit unusual, but really it should be fine as long as Denslow and Baum don't have some sort of falling out.

Guess what happened in 1902 while they were working on the Wizard of Oz Stage Musical?

So, Denslow and Baum went their separate ways, with Baum going on to write "The Marvelous Land of Oz", while Denslow continued illustrating for books such as "The Pearl and the Pumpkin". He also worked on a small book called "Denslow's Scarecrow and the Tin-Man", featuring a short story about the duo getting into some hijinx after deciding they were tired of working endlessly on the Wizard of Oz stage show - I'm sure he wasn't working through anything there.

Around the time Marvelous Land got published, he also worked on a newspaper series called "Queer Visitors from the Marvelous Land of Oz" which served both to promote the sequel and increase the reach of the Oz brand. It's also one of the few remaining artefacts of a time when Baum really wanted Professor Wogglebug to be the mascot of the Oz series, but that's a discussion for another time.

Denslow sees this and thinks "Well, I'll show him! I'll make my own newspaper series!" and so we got Denslow’s Scarecrow and the Tin-Man (yes he used the same name as he did for the book - he also split that book into two halves and published them in the newspaper series, so that’s confusing). Unlike Baum's strip, this series mainly stuck to the events of the 1902 stage musical, so Dorothy never left Oz and is also referred to as Dorothy Gale (a name Baum wouldn't use in prose until Ozma of Oz) or Dotty (her show-exclusive nickname). The first story also makes reference to a Good Witch covering the poppy field with snow, which didn't happen in the book but did happen in the musical. Other than this though, they keep references deliberately vague - no mention is made of King Pastoria II, Cynthia Synch, or Dorothy’s pet cow, Imogene (who replaces Toto in the stage musical - similarly, this series makes no reference to Toto). It’s interesting to see an Oz-related work be influenced by a very popular adaptation other than the MGM movie.

Okay, but who is John Burr the Chestnut Man?

John Burr is introduced in the second story in the Scarecrow and Tin-Man series, and immediately he raises questions. Apparently, he's the Fairy Godfather of the Scarecrow (which possibly links him to the Scarecrow's 1902 musical origin wherein he comes to life because Dorothy wished for a friend, but this isn't made explicit) and possibly the Tin-Man. It's not clear. The Scarecrow and the Tin-Man are joined at the hip for most of this series though, so it hardly matters. In his first appearance, he transports the Scarecrow, Tin-Man, and the Cowardly Lion down to Earth, making him one of the most powerful characters in the series at this point.

Later in the series, he hands the Scarecrow and the Tin-Man "Magic Passes" because nobody will tell these poor guys how money works, so they just keep stealing things (relatedly, the Scarecrow and the Tin-Man book I mentioned earlier where they're performing in the musical mentions that the two just aren't paid for their work... again, I'm sure Denslow wasn't working through anything there)... and that's it. That's all we know of him. He enters the narrative, fulfils this oddly powerful role for someone who isn't even hinted at in anything prior and is then forgotten about entirely.

Also, he sells chestnuts, that's why he's the chestnut man.

[Honestly, the funniest thing about this whole situation to me is that Denslow's Scarecrow and the Tin-Man series is just significantly better than Queer Visitors from the Marvelous Land of Oz - better art and the writing is just very charming - both are probably equally racist though, so be warned if you want to seek these out].

[osemanverse-events]

🎁🎄 to: @cwream from: @teejaysnow

Charlie has changed the group name to “EMERGENCY!!!”

Charlie: Help!! It’s Christmas Day on Wednesday.

Sarah: Yes, darling. We know.

Charlie: And I still haven’t gotten Nick a gift. And, I mean, it’s a gift. For Nick. So it needs to be, like, the best Christmas gift ever. Suggestions, please 🙏🏼🙏🏼

Darcy: You could always give him a blowjpppplm

Tara: …

Tara: Sorry about that, Darcy is no longer allowed access to her phone.

Elle: It’s a good idea though.

Sarah: I’m pretending like I didn’t see that.

Elle: Sorry, Mrs Nelson.

Sarah: I’m not saying it’s a bad idea. Just that I definitely didn’t see it.

Charlie: I hate you. All of you.

Tao: Can’t you just get him a chew toy and take him to the dog park like the good boy that he is?

Charlie: STOP REFERRING TO MY BOYFRIEND AS A GOOD BOY!!!

Tara: Are you saying that he isn’t a good boy?

Charlie: I’m saying that he isn’t a golden retriever.

Tao: But he’s just so dog-coded.

Charlie: Nick. Does. Not. Look. Like. A. Golden. Retriever.

Sarah: Oh, but he definitely does.

Tao has changed the group name to “Nick looks like a golden retriever”

Charlie has changed the group name to “Nick does not look like a golden retriever and stop changing the group name, Tao”

Charlie: I hate you most of all, Scarecrow.

Tao: Rude!! Anyway, just get Toto some Bonios, I’ve heard they’re good for a shiny coat.

Charlie: Toto? Would that make me Dorothy??

Tao: You called me Scarecrow. So if the shoes fit 👠👠

Tara: Wouldn’t he technically be a friend of Dorothy, though? So, with Scarecrow already taken, that would make him either the Tin Man or the Cowardly Lion.

Tao: Fine. The lion then. And Elle is definitely Glinda ❤️❤️

Sarah: Excuse me but who am I in this brand new Wizard of Oz adaptation you’re creating? 

Sarah: And think long and hard before you answer that.

Tao: …

Tao: New phone, who dis?

Sarah: Good choice. Anyway, I’ve got to go pick the golden retriever up from his Christmas shopping, please don’t say anything else that will make me regret being in this chat.

Darcy: You mean like Charlie giving Nick a lap danpppplm

Tara: Sorry again, I’ll hide Darcy’s phone better this time.

Elle: Another good idea though.

Sarah: Leaving now…

Charlie has changed the group name to “You’re all evil and I hate you”

Charlie: You all suck! You’re at, like, vampire level of suckiness.

Tao: Are we talking Bela Lugosi vampire suckiness or Twilight vampire suckiness? Because those are two very different kinds of suckinesses and I for one will not be accused of Twilight vampire-level of suckiness, thanks.

Elle: I’m pretty sure suckinesses isn’t a word. Also, you’d make a great Edward. 

Tao: You take that back! I’ve never been so insulted in my life!!

Tara: She’s got a point, though. Broody, stubborn, tall. That’s definitely you.

Elle has changed the group name to “Tao is a Twilight vampire”

Tao: Hey, when did this chat turn from roasting Charlie into let’s bully Tao?? I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative, one that I have never asked to be a part of.

Elle: You’re too embarrassed to accept your Twilight suckiness but you’ll quote Taylor Swift like she’s one of your overly pretentious filmmakers?

Tao: I am secure enough in my masculinity to both listen to and quote Taytay, thank you very much. Also, Twilight is nothing but terrible writing and terrible acting.

Tao: Oh, and also capitalism.

Elle: Didn’t you say that Robert Pattinson was the best Batman?

Tao: Hey, I told you that in confidence.

Charlie: Wait, you, Tao Xu, have watched a Batman movie??!!!

Tao: Now see what you’ve done.

Charlie: YOU HAVE WATCHED ENOUGH BATMAN MOVIES TO HAVE A FAVOURITE BATMAN?!!!!

Tao: Christopher Nolan is an amazing director and I am therefore prepared to watch whatever project he’s involved in, even if it is a stupid superhero franchise.

Charlie: Yes, but

Charlie: Nolan didn’t direct the Pattinson movie.

Tao: …

Tao: Fine. I like Batman, okay? Can we get back to the fact that you just discovered that Christmas is in four days??

Charlie: Shit. Yes. Christmas. Help!!

Elle: I still say Darcy had the right idea.

Charlie: I am not giving Nick a blowjob for Christmas!!!

Elle: Why not? Even his mum said it was a good idea.

Tao: How do you gift-wrap a blowjob though?

Charlie: Can we all STOP TALKING ABOUT BLOWJOBS??

Elle has changed the group name to “Charlie should give Nick a blowjob for Christmas”

Charlie has changed the group name to “Elle is one warning away from being kicked out of the chat”

Elle has changed the group name to “Elle is surprisingly okay with that”

Tara: Can’t you just get him a book on rugby or something? I’m sure Waterstones has a million of them.

Charlie: But that’s not the best Christmas gift ever, is it?? And it NEEDS to be the best Christmas gift ever since this is the last Christmas before Nick leaves for uni.

Tao: Never to be heard from again, I’m sure. Jeez, Charlie, he’s applying for Leeds, not the North Pole.

Charlie: Might as well be. Do you know how far away Leeds is?

Tao: Yes. Because you keep telling us. It’s 229 miles.

Tara: Yep. 229 miles.

Elle: 229 miles.

Charlie: IT’S 229 MILES!!

Tara: Although to be fair, it’s about 3,700 miles to the North Pole, so… 🤷🏾‍♀️

Charlie: But none of those miles includes the M25.

Tara: Point taken. You’ll obviously never see him again.

Charlie: Exactly. And focus, people. Nick? Gift?!

Tao changed the group name to “Charlie is being annoying again”

Charlie: Funny. Really.

Tao: How hard can it be? I mean, you could get Nick a rolled up newspaper and he’d love it because you got it for him. He’s just as whipped as you are. 

Charlie: So your suggestion is a rolled up newspaper 😒😒

Tao: Maybe not my first suggestion but it’s among the top five.

Charlie: Such helpful. Very appreciate.

Elle: He’s right though, Nick is ridiculously whipped. I wouldn’t suggest a rolled up newspaper per se, but whatever you end up getting will be his “best Christmas gift ever” just because it’s from you.

Charlie changed the group name to “I am not getting Nick a rolled up newspaper for Christmas”

Charlie: And STOP CHANGING THE GROUP NAME!!

Elle changed the group name to “No!”

Tara changed the group name to “Now you’re both being annoying”

Tara: Can we please get back to Charlie’s dilemma or I’ll give Darcy back her phone.

Tao: Pretty sure that threat is in violation of the Geneva Convention.

Tara: I don’t think the Geneva Convention is applicable here. Maybe you could invoke the Animal Welfare Act instead?

Charlie: ANIMAL Welfare Act? Really?? Who’s the animal here?

Tara: Nick.

Elle: Nick, obviously.

Tao: That golden retriever of yours.

Charlie: …

Charlie: I asked for that one, didn’t I?

Charlie: Anyway, can you people stop being you for one second? I really need help.

Tao: Oh, we know.

Charlie: Shut it, Edward.

Elle: Okay, vampires aside, what are we thinking? Are we going for practical, sentimental, futurity?

Charlie: Futurity?

Elle: I don’t know, something Nick can take with him to Leeds to remind him of you?

Tara: Like an oil painting! Very Jane Austen. I’m sure Elle can paint one for you?

Elle: Not in four days I can’t!!

Charlie: And I am not giving Nick a painting of myself like some narcissistic twat.

Tara: You’re being a very Negative Nelly right now, which isn’t very Austen of you.

Charlie: Why did I ever think asking you lot was a good idea again?

Charlie changed the group name to “You’re all useless”

Elle: That’s a bit harsh.

Tao: Agreed.

Tara: 😭😭😭

Charlie changed the group name to “Sorry and I love you all very much a lot ❤️❤️❤️”

Tao: 😑😑

Charlie: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Tao: Fine. I guess we love you too.

Charlie: Nice. Now, gimme suggestions!!

Tao: I still vote for the dog biscuits.

Elle: Can’t you make him some kind of gift basket, like, I don’t know, “10 things I love about you”?

Charlie: …

Charlie: That’s actually a good idea! Although ten doesn’t sound enough, more like “50 things I love about you”. Or 100. Maybe “1000 things I love about you”?

Tao changed the group name to “You’re gonna need a bigger boat”

Elle: “Of all the things I love about Nick, the one thing I love the most is his…”

Tara: Elle!! 😱😱😱

Elle: 😎🍆

Nick: Um. You guys do know I’m in this group too, right?

Charlie: Shit.

Charlie has left the group

Tao has left the group

Elle has left the group

Tara has left the group

Aled: Hi, Nick, what’s up?