#YES SHANNON TELL EM

[saisons-en-enfer]

Come on, nail me to the cross in the darkest alley I said, the Prince of Peace doesn't have to know about it Aw, say three Hail Marys, turn around, pray about it Aw, come on, nail me to the cross in the darkest alley

[laurfilijames]

Like My Dreams

Part 1

Intro

Pete Dunham Masterlist

Pairing: Pete Dunham x female reader

Words: 4.8k

Warnings: Mentions of a broken leg, use of crutches. Bruises and cuts. Swearing. Alcohol consumption and use of pain medication. Discussions of fighting.

Summary: Life is getting back to normal for Pete, including going back to work and participating in his first scrap since almost getting killed, and little does he know that an unexpected person is going to step in and show him that while football is life, there may be more to life than just football.

After moving home to help your sister with your nephew, Jack, after her divorce, you meet his bruised, but gorgeous teacher, and later discover you're connected in more ways than one.

A/N: Part 1 is here!! Pete deserves the world and I'm using this fic as a way to rebuild his for him.

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"Have you heard from the Yank at all, there, Peg Leg?" Swill asked through a grin, ducking when Pete raised his arm up in an attempt to hit him.

"Aye, I'll beat you with my crutch, you cunt," he threatened, turning away for a split second before making a quick jab at his mate with the proposed weapon, making Swill jump and spill his beer. "And yes, I have. Turns out our Yank mate has sought his revenge and managed to get a recording of that geezer Jeremy admitting he put the blame on him, so he's right back into Harvard now and will be graduating soon as."

"Ahh, result!" Swill cheered, clanking his glass against Pete's before extending his arm out to cheers with Ned and then Ike.

"Gonna be a proper Journo now."

"Good on him," Ike nodded.

"Yeah, yeah. Says he's planning a visit back across the pond soon as he's done," Pete explained.

"Oi, when are you going back to work, Pete?" Dave asked, handing him a fresh pint before taking a sip of his own.

Pete took a long drink, tilting his head to the side and shrugging slightly as he swallowed his beer. "Soon, I hope. Apparently the little lads have been giving the substitute a right time. I already had to go in and give 'em the what-for…tell 'em to be nice while I'm away."

"Bloody buggers," Dave sighed, shaking his head.

"Told them I'd taught them better than that." Pete took another sip, wiping his mouth with his hand. "Their response was that they wouldn't have to be such shits if she wasn't such an old, miserable cow."

"Yeah, there's no doubt you're their role model, then eh?" Dave laughed.

Pete shrugged in agreement, finding no point in arguing.

"Once I get out of this cast I can go back in," he explained, turning and leaning his back against the bar. "I'm itching to get back to it, but more just to get out of Steve and Shannon's place."

"That bad?"

He sighed, choosing his words carefully, "Shannon is being nice to me for the first time ever, but they fuss constantly. It'll just be nice to go home."

"Yeah, all in time, mate." Dave clapped his shoulder, happy Pete was being cared for and wasn't spending the long days of recovery alone.

There were days his leg ached like hell, and after ditching his crutches about a week ago, Pete sometimes wished he still had them to lean on. He sat on the edge of his desk, reading out loud to the class from there rather than pacing through the desks like he had been, his limp becoming more and more noticeable with each step, but despite the pain from the long days of being back on his feet, he was grateful to be back in his classroom with life pretty much back to normal.

Being back in his flat helped with his overall recovery too, having felt desperate to get out of Steve and Shannon's stuffy place and in the familiar comforts of his own, having appreciated time spent with them and his sweet nephew Ben, but ultimately relieved to relish in the peace and quiet.

The bell rang, signaling the end of their school day, and Pete marked his page and closed the book, glancing at the clock in slight disbelief that the day was already over.

"Okay, boys, we'll pick up there tomorrow," he announced, collecting some papers on his desk as his class packed up their notebooks and began filing out of the room. "And remember your assignments are due on my desk first thing Tuesday morning, so get cracking on them!" he shouted over their excited voices, some of them moaning in disappointment over their homework.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket to see a text from Bov confirming their plans to meet at the pub later for beers, and excitement buzzed through him knowing that in two more days, West Ham was playing Manchester at home. The two firms hadn't seen each other since the GSE surprised them at the station and embarrassed the hell out of them, and word was that they were gunning for a comeback more than ever. Pete knew he would have to be careful, but the thought of getting back into fighting and experiencing that rush as his firm kicked the shit out of the other's whose bruised pride had never recovered from the last time made him feel like he was close to invincible.

"I don't know why you keep eating it, then, Bov," Pete scolded, walking through the doors of The Abbey with his mate who kept going on about his sore stomach, unable to help the laugh at his expense as he watched him hold his gut and beeline it right for the toilets.

"What's the matter with him?" Dave asked, nodding in Bovver's direction as he struggled to get by other patrons.

Pete shook his head and sighed, "Bloody guy insists on ordering the hottest curry going and then fucking complains about his insides turning as soon as he's stuffed it down."

"He'll never learn, will he?"

"Nah, serves him right," Pete chuckled, clanging his glass against Dave's after being handed it.

"I don't know about you boys, but I am more than ready for the weekend," Ike said exasperatedly, "work has been kicking my ass."

"You best be rested up for our big event on Saturday…" Dave warned, earning a scoff from him.

"Yeah, yeah, you know I'm good for it. When have I ever let us down?"

Dave opened his mouth to quip at him, but started laughing when Ike shoved his arm and directed his attention to Pete. "What about you, eh? You feeling up to it?"

"Mate," he said pointedly, his eyebrow raised, "more than I ever have." Pete grinned, knowing each of them would be keeping extra close watch on him despite him feeling like no one would be able to knock him to the ground.

"I've been trying to get Fiona down here for some drinks," Swill started to explain, "her bestie is here staying with her for a bit and said they were looking to go out on the pull-"

"Aye, I'll show your sister a good time," Ned interrupted, causing Swill to glare at him seriously.

"Don't you fucking think for a second you're gonna touch my sister."

Pete laughed into his beer, listening to the two of them carry on until Keith interrupted them.

"Isn't she the hot one that moved away a few years back?"

"Yeah, that's the one," Swill confirmed.

"Oi, she's fit as fuck," Ned chimed in, making a crude gesture with his hands.

"She's here helping her sister out with her nephew or something, I dunno," Swill nonchalantly explained. "I keep telling her that Fi's place is too cramped and she should come stay with me."

"In your dreams!" Pete laughed, "Poor girl would be traumatized if she spent more than five minutes with you."

"Yeah, well, you'll just see when she comes 'round, eh. I'm very charming when I need to be."

"The only charm you're going to have is when you're helping me kick the snot out of Manchester's top bloke." Pete wrapped his arm around Swill's shoulders and necked the rest of his pint, the exhilaration of the upcoming match and fight already tingling through his veins.

"Fucking right, mate!" Swill cheered, patting Pete on the back aggressively to help pump him up even more.

Saturday turned out to be one of the best days Pete could remember having. The Hammers won 2-0 and him and the boys made the ruck afterward almost look too easy, but it didn't go without it's evidence.

He looked at his bruised reflection in the mirror, having missed seeing various shades of red and blue marking his face, his skin tender as he pulled the razor down over it before rinsing it off under the tap. He smiled to himself in thinking a clean shave would make up for his appearance when he showed up to school that morning, the colours even more pronounced than they were yesterday, having already earned glares from other staff members as he walked through the hallways to his classroom. The little lads always got a kick out of seeing their teacher's battle wounds unlike the Headmaster, but Pete still did his best to set a good example for them and prove to everyone that even a Weekend Warrior could maintain his professionalism. Pete winced when he went over a cut on his cheek, making blood spring from it again, and washing the remaining shaving cream off his cheeks and chin, he dried his face and went through to his bedroom to get dressed.

"Have a good day, Jack!" you smiled, watching your nephew climb out of the back seat of your car, thinking how dapper he looked in his neatly ironed school uniform and finding how he styled his hair with a bit of gel too sweet. He was growing up so quickly, ten going on fourteen it seemed like some days, and despite the circumstances, you were grateful to be around him more. There was no doubt that the split between your sister and his dad was tough on him, but overall he seemed to be coping okay, and you hoped a small bit of it was because his one and only amazing Aunt was there to help look after him. Part of your designated duties were to drop him off and pick him up from school and football practices, your work hours more flexible and easier to line up with his activities than your sister's, and it was the least you felt you could do to help out.

"Thanks, Auntie."

"You've got your football gear, right?" you called out through the passenger window you quickly rolled down before he got too far from the car.

"Yup," he confirmed, holding up his cleats and giving his backpack a shrug to keep over his shoulder.

"Okay, then, I'll see you at half four when practice is over. Maybe we'll go grab a bite and see a film?"

He scowled, "The match is on tonight!"

You raised your hands in mercy, "May the football gods forgive me!"

It earned a laugh from him, making you smile, the little 'see ya!' he gave you as he turned and ran off toward the building enough to make your Tuesday feel a little less mundane.

Glancing out of the corner of your eye at the backseat as you reached for your purse, you did a double-take, noticing Jack's lunch bag and homework left forgotten on the seat.

"Shit!" you hissed before giving a long sigh, looking out the window for any sign he was still around.

He was long gone into the school now, forcing you to switch your car off and take it inside, and you trotted down the pathway quickly in your heels so as not to be late to work yourself.

Something had cheesed-off the secretary already this morning, and with little to no help from her, you took it upon yourself to wander down the hallways in search of Jack's homeroom.

"You alright there, Jack?" Pete asked, passing out a worksheet on each desk, his concern growing after noticing the sulk on the boy's face. He looked like he was about to cry, having finished rooting through his bag for the second time since he'd gotten into class, clearly searching for something that wasn't there.

"I don't have my assignment." There was so much defeat in the poor kid's voice, and Pete couldn't bring himself to be cross with him even if he wanted to be.

"It's alright, mate, you can hand it in tomorrow."

When that didn't seem to ease his troubles over it, Pete crouched down beside his desk, his leg complaining as he did.

"You did do it, yeah?"

"Yes," Jack confirmed, his disappointment not fading. "I think I left it in my Aunt's car."

"Right, then there's nothing else to be done about it for now, eh? Mistakes happen, I won't knock any marks off for it."

"I forgot mine, too, Mr. Dunham," the boy sitting behind Jack called out.

"No you did not, Louis," Pete said through a wince as he stood. "The only thing you forgot was to actually do it."

Louis, along with all the other boys, laughed, the kid being famous for never handing in anything on time or simply neglecting to do half the assignments tasked in the first place, his admission not coming as a surprise to Pete.

About to explain the instructions on the pages he had just handed out, Pete was interrupted by a light knock and the door opening, making all of them pause to look at the slightly embarrassed, but extremely beautiful woman who was disrupting their class.

"I'm so sorry," you began, smiling in your bashfulness. You looked directly at Jack, making Pete swivel on the spot he stood on to follow your gaze before looking back at you with a big grin on his face, watching as you held up a folder containing what had to be his forgotten assignment.

"Looks like you've got yourself a guardian angel, mate," Pete smirked, limping over to the door where he opened it more for you.

You apologized again, but somehow couldn't wipe the smile from your face as you got lost in Jack's teacher's vibrantly blue eyes, the colour seemingly enhanced and appearing almost fake due to the reddish bruises that surrounded them.

"Don't give it another thought," he assured you, looking back at you with a similar amusement before reaching his hand out to take the folder decorated with West Ham United stickers from you.

More bruises and cuts decorated his knuckles, making you wonder what the hell this man got up to when he wasn't teaching your nephew, and you made a mental note to ask Jack questions about it all later.

"You've forgotten your lunch, too," you spoke, peeling your eyes away from the man who made butterflies flutter violently in your stomach. Jack trotted up to the front of the class where you stood, taking the bag from you sheepishly.

"Jack, you're a very lucky lad," Pete began, moving to perch on the edge of his desk. "I don't have anyone bringing me my lunch if I've left it."

You shrugged and nervously tucked your hands in the pockets of your jacket now that they were free, biting your lower lip to try to stop yourself from smiling more.

"I won't take up anymore of your time," you said to the impossibly handsome teacher, maintaining eye contact with him as you took a step backwards toward the door, praying your feet didn't betray you. "Sorry, again, for the disruption."

"Not a problem at all," he said slowly through another bright grin, his head tilting curiously as he crossed his arms over his chest while you walked through the door, closing it behind you.

The second it latched you heard the entire class erupt in a long 'ooooooo', jeering their teacher as any group of ten-year-old boys would for talking to a girl, making you smile even more when you heard him shush them and chuckle lightly before continuing on with his lesson.

10:47 Fiona: We're going to the pub tonight.

10:49 You: …

10:49 Fiona: I said, we're going to the pub tonight. That's an order.

10:51 You: Fine.

10:51 Fiona: Don't be mardy. We need to get out of the house. I promise to show you a good time.

10:51 Fiona: Plus, there's a match on, so it'll be full of fit lads.

10:52 You: Is that really your main selling point?

10:52 Fiona: Yes. We'll see which of us can get the most free drinks.

11:09 Fiona: I'm taking your silence as a yes.

11:09 Fiona: Maybe you'll even get a snog or a shag in the toilets!

11:17 You: I swear you're a bigger perv than your brother.

Tucking your phone back inside your desk drawer, you bit the inside of your cheek and sighed out deeply, trying to regain concentration on the computer screen in front of you, but it was helpless. All you could think about was the fraction of a possibility of seeing Jack's teacher there, the teacher whose name you didn't even know, out of the simple fact that he probably spent his time outside of school in a pub watching football as most men did. Even if he did happen to be in that exact pub, in that exact part of London, on that exact night, the chances of him being there without a woman, or many, hanging off his arm were slim. Maybe he was even engaged or married, happily at home on a Tuesday night with his missus…

Regardless of your speculations, you continued to think of the way he had looked at you, letting this silly and unexpected fantasy get the better of you, recounting every moment of your meet-cute and how unbelievable it would be to find yourself tangled up with the likes of him. Had you exaggerated the glint in his eyes and the brightness of his smile, or how he made your whole body tingle with that nervous-excitement enough to feel like you were floating?

With another sigh, you willed yourself to get a grip, needing to get something accomplished in your workday, the chances of seeing him outside the school slim.

Still, a girl could dream, and smiling to yourself, you secretly thanked your friend for her persistence in taking you out.

Several very distracted hours later, you pulled up beside the pitch outside the school, seeing a small mob of boys in various coloured jerseys running around it, and your eyes immediately found and fixed on the tall coach that was unmistakably the same man who had occupied your mind all day.

You sat for only a couple of minutes before their practice was over, watching the banged-up teacher with a hitch in his step walk around collecting pylons while the boys ditched their jersey's into a bag and started to clean up their belongings piled near the fence.

Jack ran to your car even though his bags were far too heavy for him to be, and seeing how sweaty he was along with the muddy stains covering his gym gear, you wondered how many of these pick-ups it would take until your car began to smell like gross footy equipment.

"How was it?" you asked when he hauled on the door and threw his stuff in, flopping himself into he back seat before shutting the door and putting on his seatbelt.

"Good. Thanks for bringing my assignment, you're a legend."

"Don't I know it," you winked at him, taking one last look over at his teacher who just so happened to be staring at you, and you felt yourself flush from head to toe as you tore your gaze away from him and blinked into reality, putting your car in gear and driving off.

You were quiet for a couple of minutes, debating quizzing your nephew about his teacher, and ultimately decided there was no harm in it.

"Does your teacher always show up with bruises on his face?"

Glimpsing in the rearview mirror, you saw Jack smile. "Mr. Dunham? Yeah, most of the time."

"You're acting like that's a normal thing, Jack," you laughed, "Why is he always battered?"

"He's a Hooligan, so yeah, it's normal."

"A Hooligan?”

"In a footy firm?” he emphasized in the form of a question, like it was the most obvious thing. “Yeah. West Ham’s, obviously."

You nodded, trying to wrap your head around the information you were getting. You knew of the firm because of Fiona, having heard the odd thing about it through her because of her brother Swill, but the ins and outs of football were something you didn't pay much attention to anymore. You weren't even sure if Swill was still a participant of the barbaric side of football, assuming he might have given up his hooliganism in exchange for his respectable career as an accountant.

"Mr. Dunham's the coolest. He's everyone's favourite teacher. A lot of grown-ups and other teachers think he's bad or whatever, but he's the nicest out of anyone and is really smart, too," Jack went on, pulling you out of your thoughts for a moment. "I want to teach history like him when I grow up. It's my favourite subject."

"Well, then, I'm sure glad I brought in that assignment for you."

"Yeah, I was real upset that I forgot it. I want to keep my grades up in his class."

It was incredible to hear your nephew talk like this, finding a role model in someone so unconventional, but seeing as his father wasn't really one to look up to, you figured it was good he found someone who inspired him.

"Right, my man," you announced, parking in your sister's driveway. "Enjoy the match! I hope they win!"

"Mr. Dunham says they will for sure. Birmingham doesn't stand a chance!"

"Well good, because even I am going to watch it tonight!"

Jack pulled a shocked face, "You're gonna watch football?"

"Yes! Cheeky…"

"Make sure you cheer for the proper team!" he laughed, tugging on his West Ham shirt to show you the crest. He closed the door after taking out all his things and ran up to the house where he stuck his tongue out at you from the porch, making you laugh and shake your head.

"Want another one, Pete?" Bovver asked, nodding to his empty glass that had been drained for a while now.

"Nah, man, I'm good. Gotta be sharp for work tomorrow."

"Since when?"

Pete glared at his mate, not wanting to get into too many details, the truth behind his reduced consumption of pints being he had just taken some pain pills on account of his leg. He had done his best to cope with it, but after running around too much at practice he had to give in, needing something to help take the edge off.

"Oi, Fi's on her way over," Swill said, sitting down beside Pete.

"Oh, tonight? Sweet," Pete said, curious to see who her friend was and if she was actually as fit as the other guys kept claiming she was.

The Abbey was packed by the time the game started with the GSE dispersed throughout to watch on the various screens hung on the walls and above the bar, Pete sticking to their usual spot in the back corner where less people were gathered.

He spotted Fiona making her way through the crowd, judging by her tipsy smile and half-finished pint that she had already been here for a decent amount of time, the atmosphere of the whole place very rowdy as the Hammers maintained a lead.

"Pete!" she called, nearly pushing someone down to get to him to give him a hug.

"Aye, aye!" He stood and accepted her embrace, unable to recall the last time he had seen her.

"How are you doing? You gave everyone quite the scare!"

He chuckled, "Yeah, all good. I'm doing fine now, thanks, Fiona." He took his seat again and looked up at her with a smile, watching as she clapped her hand on her chest.

"What a relief, you should've seen how gutted they all were. Swill was beside himself."

"As they should've been!" he laughed, spinning his empty glass on the coaster. "You enjoying the match?"

"Wha- oh! Yeah," she laughed, her smile somehow larger than her brother's, "I'm not paying all that much attention if I'm honest!"

"I can tell!"

She shrugged and took a long sip of her drink, glancing around the bar.

He nodded at her, his brows knitted, "Where's your friend?"

"Hell if I know! Somewhere over there," she waved, motioning in the direction of the pool table, "Ned and Swill are chatting her ears off."

"Sounds about right…"

Pete settled into his seat and drew his focus back to the match as Fiona went and greeted someone else, but he'd be kidding himself if he pretended his thoughts weren't constantly on you, unable to get you out of his mind for even a second. He wondered if he would be lucky enough to see you again; if Jack would just so happen to forget something on a weekly basis and if you were going to be the one consistently picking him up from school and football practice, or maybe even be the guardian he would get to sit down and discuss Jack's grades with at parent-teacher interviews.

But it was rare for lightning to strike twice.

The Brigid Abbey Pub itself was incredibly charming, even if most of the people occupying it were far less so. Swill was the same as always, never changing his lewd, loud ways despite being forced to be well-mannered and respectful throughout the day, but it was rare that anyone had ever made you laugh as hard as he did. His mates were all there, most of them hanging around where you and Fi were, but mentions of someone named Pete and his whereabouts kept coming up.

You found yourself taking in your surroundings more than the game itself, looking at all the plaques and paraphernalia that hung on the walls, all while scanning the crowd in hopes of spotting the one person you somehow felt desperate to see again.

"Who are you looking for?"

"Hmm? What? No one," you lied to Fiona, though very unconvincingly.

"You spotted a fit bloke, didn't you?" she said with a grin that rivaled Swill's.

"Yeah, me," Swill chimed in, causing Fiona to talk back to him about being gross and them to start bickering as they usually did.

They always managed to make you laugh, and you had to admit you were having a better time than you thought you were going to, enjoying the company of your bestie and her brother, who's mates were exceptionally kind and welcoming.

It wasn't until you overheard a couple of them discussing a fight they had had that you really started paying attention to what was happening around you.

“Wait, are you still part of all that?” you asked Swill, grabbing his arm to make him turn around to face you.

"For life!" he exclaimed, "I'll be dead before I leave it."

"Yeah, well, some of you are making that come true more than others," Fiona scoffed.

You screwed up your face in complete bewilderment, "Wait. What?"

"The head of the firm," she began explaining, "their mate, Pete, nearly died about four months ago in a fight. He's just been back to work the last few weeks and everything. It’s a complete miracle he's even alive."

"Jesus Christ," you muttered. "And he still fights?"

Ike huffed out a laugh before turning serious, "Oh, fuck yeah…like nothing ever happened."

The rest of the lads all excitedly started recalling how intensely this Pete had fought the other day, going on about how their fearless leader was back and stronger than before.

"Is he here?" you asked, wanting to meet this death-defying prodigy of England's roughest unofficial sport.

"'Course he is," said Ned, "he's sat over there in his usual spot." He nodded toward the back corner of the pub, and standing on your tip-toes, you attempted to see over the hoard of heads between where you were and there, but it was impossible to manage.

It was almost hard to believe that these men, who held regular jobs and had seemingly normal lives, still carried on the insane, delinquent habits of the firms brought on from decades prior, and even more so that after one of them was nearly killed, they continued on with more pride than ever.

The match ended in a win for the mighty Hammers, the high spirits of their dedicated supporters lingering on in the pub, helping to keep Pete going despite being the most sober one of all his mates. As the groups of people started to thin out, he was finally able to spot where Fiona and the rest of them had been loitering, his eyes trained on one person in particular.

His heart hammered in his chest as he downed the rest of the beer he had been nursing, praying for the slight nervousness he felt to calm.

"Well, fuck me," he murmured under his breath, standing from the table where he left Dave asking him what he was on about and where he was going.

Not bothering to ease his friend's mind with an explanation, Pete slowly made his way through the crowd, almost afraid that if he moved too quickly, the scene he was walking toward would vanish from his sight like a mirage.

A grin that met his eyes crept up his lips, thinking that maybe dreams didn't fade and die and it was possible that lightning could strike twice after all.

---

Part 2

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[ncisfranchise-source]

In the December 9 episode titled “Vivo o Muerto,” a case of a missing woman who disappeared after a night of clubbing with a Navy seaman ends up answering some burning questions about Leroy Gibbs’ past.

Here, Executive Producer David J. North explains why he and co-showrunner Gina Lucita Monreal decided it was time to explain how and when Gibbs’ exacted revenge on Pedro Martinez, the drug dealer who killed Gibbs’ wife Shannon and daughter Kelly.

DEADLINE What did NCIS fans think they knew about Leroy’s past?

DAVID J. NORTH Most of the hardcore fans know, of course, that Gibbs killed the man who killed his family, Pedro Hernandez. And many of ’em may have known that he did it before he started at NIS. But I think Gina Lucita Monreal and I really wanted to dig in and get to the reality of it. What would’ve happened? It’s not as simple as Frank showing him that folder with the name and then suddenly, Gibbs goes and kills Pedro. We wanted to show how this was a killer who no one else could find, that NIS couldn’t find. And how did Gibbs do it, really? Was it by sheer will, absolutely needing to find this man and not sleeping until he did? And in the process he kinds of learns that he has a skill for this and maybe being an agent is something that he could do.

DEADLINE So it sounds like you guys pretty much knew you wanted to tell the backstory of how Gibbs killed Pedro within this first season.

NORTH Yes, absolutely. We’ve built a lot of season one around this moment. It was certainly one of the tent poles that we were working towards. Austin Stowell [who plays Gibbs] is just incredible. Some of these themes, it’s tough to put yourself in that head space. We write this up and we give him the runway to perform. We continue to be blown away by these performances he gives us. He is studying Mark Harmon nonstop and always holding himself accountable to deliver these performances. Gina and I and Mark have all just been absolutely thrilled.

DEADLINE The shooting did get a little bloody.

NORTH I showed exactly how much they allowed me to, yes. Because it’s on a broadcast network, it’s very regulated. But we deal with wonderful people who know how important this is in NCIS lore and also they really believed in the episode. They really allowed us to show what we wanted to show. Our show is darker. It’s a little grittier than what you’re used to in the other NCIS franchises, and we’re really proud of how grounded and how real we think that moment came across. I mean, you’re showing brain matter as well, which we did.

DEADLINE We need to talk about the use of Spandau Ballet in this episode.

NORTH That was Gina. She sent me the script and it was awesome. I was blown the f–k away. And the way she tied in those two songs in the opening, the split screen opening with Gibbs and Lala. I mean, it just was remarkable. I have had so much pride in what Gina wrote in what we delivered in this episode.

DEADLINE Is this the end of it? Will Jethro basically get away with this?

NORTH Based on NCIS canon and the fact that there was so many years of NCIS, we do know that Gibbs does get away with it. But is this the end of it? No. This is something that’s going to follow him and in our show, it’s going to follow him in very intense and unexpected ways.

DEADLINE Is there a chance that folks within Pedro’s circle may suspect Jethro in some way?

NORTH Over time? Yes. For that, we’ll just tell people to stay tuned, but there was a lot of holes to fill and we’ve had a lot of fun filling those plot holes in the history of NCIS.

DEADLINE So now that we know Jethro got rid of Pedro, will his anger issues go away?

NORTH He thought maybe he would feel differently than he did after doing it. This guy has been through hell, so yes, there’ll be moments, but also we’re going to see in an upcoming episode that he wants to do better and be better for himself and is willing to accept help in whatever form that could come in.

DEADLINE So what is happening between Mariel Molina’s Lala and Jethro? I mean, obviously it’s beyond just a rapport. They’re seeing something in each other. And is Lala going to get over the idea that Gibbs killed Pedro?

NORTH I think it’s very complicated for Lala. She’s someone who would understand why he did what he did. I mean, this is a guy who was going to get away with murdering Gibbs’ family. But it’s tricky because she really, for the first time, got emotional with Gibbs in that hotel room, poured her heart out and said, Franks is going to pull you off of this, but I’m going to get him. I’m going to get him for you.’ And Gibbs didn’t tell her. He didn’t say, ‘Hey, I already got him.’ So it’s a complicated thing for her. She understands what he did, but there’s a certain degree of trust that’s been broken.

DEADLINE In the NCIS lore, do fans know that Jethro potentially hooked up with an agent back in the day? I’m trying to see where you’re going with Lala.

NORTH Well, there is Rule 12, I always forget which numbers they are, but Rule 12 is to never hook up with a coworker. But no, there wasn’t necessarily any planted seeds directly about Lala. We’re just telling the story as it unravels for me and Gina, which is we think that these two people came into each other’s lives at a time that was inopportune. But there’s obviously an attraction there that’s continuing to develop.

DEADLINE Do you already know, are you going to end this season on a cliffhanger?

NORTH That is the plan. Gina and I know what the ending of this season that we would like to tell for sure.

[hippolotamus]

Oh girl…. You have no idea what you’ve started here

🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️🎖️

I think I may have a bit of an idea, beloved. Strap in for your sentences, buttercup, and remember you love me 💞

“No way. Say what you want, but this thing with the Dodgers was a fluke, Shan.” Eddie stuffs his hands in his pockets and narrowly avoids the swat to his right arm. It’s a common hazard of challenging her sports predictions and completely worth it, in his opinion, to indulge his favorite pastime of riling her up.  “You take that back! Because you know I’m right. If MacPhail can drag the Reds from the pit they were in, he can do it with Brooklyn, too.” She sneaks in a poke to his ribs. “Mark my words, Diaz. As soon as this war ends, and life gets back to normal, he’s gonna have ‘em in the World Series again.” “Yes, ma’am. Whatever you say.” He gives her a mock salute and a shit eating grin, already anticipating her gloating. After four years of losing almost every bet on championship games and the Series, he knows better than to expect anything else.  With the war on, they should probably be doing something more useful than walking around his family’s farm. But it’s an unseasonably warm day in January, perfect for wandering aimlessly and speculating about topics that aren’t heavy or life altering. Sophia’s husband was drafted just before Christmas. Her and the baby, Alice, have been staying in Sophia’s old bedroom ever since.  “Eddie, Shannon.” The postman, Mr. Lawrence (though he insists everyone call him by his first name, Jude) gives them a polite nod. “How are the young people today?” “Why don’t you tell us?” Shannon counters. Jude flushes a deep, rosy pink, the same way he always does when Shannon compliments him. He’s maybe ten years older than them and Eddie thinks he should just ask her out already.  Jude otherwise ignores her, choosing to rummage in his satchel for the day’s mail. Eddie can’t help but notice the way his face falls when he finds what he’s looking for.  “Uh, everything okay?”  Like a flip has been switched, Eddie’s world shifts into slow motion. Jude gradually straightens himself, as if he’s deliberately going vertebrae by vertebrae. He clears his throat and shifts uncomfortably, whatever it is that he’s found still hidden from view. His eyes are glassy, emphasizing bright, blue irises that seem to stare right past Eddie. Jude clears his throat again and extends a hand, holding out a sealed letter.  “I’m sorry, Eddie.”  His world narrows to a cream colored envelope, addressed to Edmundo Diaz. In a haze he breaks the seal, unfolding the paper within. For one blissfully ignorant moment he pretends that it’s news about Sophia’s husband, even though everything in him screams that it’s impossible. Because then it would be addressed to his sister. And there’s no reasoning to justify why something so personal and life altering would come to Eddie instead.  “Eddie?” Shannon sounds far away and right beside him all at once. “What is it?”  He scans the text again, in case there’s been some kind of mistake. But it’s all there, neatly typed out and indisputable. On February 6 at 8 a.m. he’s due at the draft board for examination. He swallows thickly, passing the letter to Shannon.  “Looks like I’ve got a date with Uncle Sam.”

make me write Teddie edition 🎖️

[lilliannoco]

lornas lost ratings pt 2

ep 10- is rhis a claire ep…YES CONFIRMED BU RAIN IT IS A CLAIRE EP I LOVEEE UUU CLAIREEE!! what is going on. why is claire. WHAT. GAVE HIM AWAY? WHY IS IT RUNNING. WHAT THE FUCK. THE? DID SHE? HUH? her scream is so me. she dug her fingernails HOW MUCH INTO HER PALMS? JESUS. how was your ob gyn 🥺 SHUT UP JACK. GOD. thomas i can pee on a stick! he did. hes dead. shut up jack. sayid would be proud. CLAIRES FONNA HAVE THE BABY SOON ‼️🗣️ today i swallowed a bug. im driving a bus and my teeth start falling out. my mums in the back, eating biscuits. everything smells of bacon. charlie i love u.

CLAIREEE EJEJNEKSHRKSBS I LOVEE U . her fucking SCREAMS goddd. he was trying to hurt my baby. i wont leave you claire. promise. I FUCKING LOVE YOU CHARLIE. FUCK YOI THOMAS WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOI EVEN THINKING. FUCK YOU. claire i love u. “uhh. me?” love u hurley. jack shut UP. i get attacked and you want to give me sleeping pillls? dont talk to me about the baby. im sick of everyone telling me what to do. GOD. CLAIRE. I LOVE YOU. shannonnn. “hes a liberal 😒” i am so not moving to the rape caves. boone shut up ab manifest. SAWYER. SAWYERR. you sure know how to butter a man up. you dont like me charlie. you just want to rescue me. CLAIRE. oh my god, he knew. i found her, the frenchwoman! sayidd. ethans a fucking freak.

ep 11- previously on lost 😈 DRAG MARKS???? CLAIRE!!! CHARLIE!!!! jack shut up. john i love u . call it jack 😡. PLS TELL ME ARE BOONE AND SHANNON FUCKING. THEYRE SO FUCKING WEIRD. THEOUGHOUT ALL OF THIS IVE NOTICED IT. FIRST EP SIBLINGS OR DATING I CANT I HATE IT THEYRE SO. anyways. shut up jack. i love eevryone here theyre so vool. walt defending john 💕💕💕 SAWYERRR. SAWYER . SAWYRR. SAWYER I LOVE YOU. SAWYER I CANT FUKUNG DO THIS SAWYER I LIVE TOU SO MUCH IM IN IM. SAWYEERRRRR. jack SHUT UP. SHUT UP JACK. YOU were impaired 😡 walt i love u 💕💕💕 hurley i LOVE YOUU !! why is ethan so. no more mr nice guy 😈😈😈 yeah u tell em jack u fucking TELL THEM! CHARLIE. CHARLIE NO. CHARLIE. CHARLIE. PLEASE. CHARLIE! YAYY HES ALIVE OKOK. claire. all they wanted was claire. WHAT IS THAT? YOO EHAT THE FORK HRAH WHAT USBTHAT

[flufallo]

[Spoken Intro: Bowen Yang & Andy Samberg]

Hello?

BowFlex!

Andrewhore! What's up, dude?

Hey, are you going to the 50th?

No, actually, I don't think I can

I'm not gonna go

What?

What are you talking about?

It's gonna be incredible

Everyone on Earth is gonna be there

I know, it's just, honestly, it stresses me out too much

What do you mean?

Come on, Andy, you know "SNL" gives me anxiety

Bowen, listen..

[Verse 1: Andy Samberg & Bowen Yang]

I know you're anxious just looking at the 30 Rock sign

And when you're inside, it gets worse

But there is one thing that you gotta keep in mind

So we're gonna press rewind

Let's go back in time

Young Danny Aykroyd, "Bass-O-Matic."

He looks so fine and fancy free

But the reality was quite tragic

He suffered from anxiety

[Spoken:]

Jesus, what was that?

I don’t know what you’re talking about

That’s the footage exactly as it aired

Skip to the '80s, Eddie Murphy

And "Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood."

He was the star of the show each Saturday

But he suffered the anxiety

[Spoken:]

I hate this

Few years later, Billy Crystal was saying:

"You look mah-velous."

But one thing wasn't "mah-velous."

He had anxiety–

[Chorus: Andy Samberg]

'Cause everyone that ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

You are not alone, my friend

And we also all have IBS

Wait, what?

Oh, yeah. Tell 'em, Sarah

[Verse 2: Sarah Sherman, Chris Parnell, Bowen Yang & Andy Samberg]

The brain-to-gut connectional is a complex and bidirectional

A communication between the

Central nervous system and your butt

So when you're watching "SNL"

Just imagine everyone you see right before the show

Went to the bathroom and took a crazy shit

Right-

Oh, if these pipes could talk (If these pipes could talk!)

The stories they would tell (If these pipes could talk.)

And oh, If these pipes could talk (If these pipes could talk!)

I think they'd sound a little like this—

[Spoken:]

You've got to stop doing that

No promises

[Verse 3: Andy Samberg, Ana Gasteyer & Molly Shannon, Both]

Jump to the '90s, Ana and Molly

Making them laugh with "Schweddy Balls."

On the outside, calm and collected

But that's not how they felt at all

Ohh, we were freaked out as hell

And we wanted to die

We wished for our own deaths

And we had IBS

[Spoken Interlude: Andy Samberg & Bowen Yang]

But come on, guys, we have perspective

We know these are champagne problems

Yes!

I mean, it's not like we're working in a coal mine

God, no

But here's a secret...

[Hook: Andy Samberg]

It's way worse than working in a coal mine

It's more dangerous than working in a coal mine

We would love to be working in a coal mine

Just look at these coal miners drinking sweet tea

They never had to get notes from Lorne

Sit underneath the bleachers with Lorne

[Spoken:]

You're proving my point. That sounds good to you?

Yeah. Now that I hear it, I might skip it, too

'Cause in the end, you gotta take care of yourself

A mature decision for our mental health

[Bridge: Bowen Yang & Andy Samberg]

But what if they forget about me? (Don’t forget meeh~)

If I don’t go to the show, will I disappear?

Or will I fall to the bottom

Of the "Best Cast Members of All Time" list?

Past Will Forte~

[Spoken: w/ Will Forte]

What the fuck?!

You know what? I'm in

Same!

[Outro: Andy Samberg & Bowen Yang, Both]

'Cause everyone (I get it now!)

That ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

We populate the waiting rooms

Of half the therapists in New York City

Every single person who ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

(Clap!)

Every single person who ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

(Everybody!)

Every single person who ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

(It's a challenging place, but we love it!)

Every single person who ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

(Stress dreams for the rest of your life!)

Every single person who ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

(We're like moths to the flame!)

Every single person who ever worked at "SNL" had Anxiety

But it burns so good

So true 🥺

[mllebabushkat]

☀️ Warrior Nun S2E6 🌙

PSA: i didn't survive this ep lakdsj;gjaskjda

haha my whiplash from Confusion to OH OH YOUNG SUZANNE

AND SHANNON

(wow i missed her and i barely knew her T^T)

so either shannon's older than i expected or superion is younger than i expected???

but more importantly

superion's halo is SO POWERFUL?????

she's got that a) touch of death palm technique Lite Version AND b) nifty overwatch lookin shield scuse me ava when will you

once again OST SLAPS

SHE IS SO BADASS!!,!,!,’cbnncbdbdbfj also cocky hahaha i love her

this fight's fave move: double neck skewer!

firstly, halo rejecting looks GNARLY

secondly, w h y (grief? fully drained? it somehow knew she failed to protect someone due to her own ego? severity of her own moral failing? i want. answers)

The PRIDE in bea’s look as ava talks 🤩 i am hanging on to every single avatrice interaction for my liFE

cam trying to summon the boogeyman is the horror trope i didn't know i needed ahahaha

MICHAEL'S GOT A NUKE tony stark lookin ass

"we are not both dying over some interdimensional power grab" u tell em!!!!1 (such a frustrating and common trope, why must the hero always be the sacrificial lamb for some lofty goal?)

yo that is one DIRTY look bea gave him tho lmfao

on today's episode of bullying william: "foster" what a dumb name L u delusional little shit

cut to vincent el bastardo

"and we shall contact god by text" the ABSURDITY PFFF

*what's in the box voice* what did adriel sayyyyyy????

obligatory fuck off adriel

picking out tmrws outfit slay boyo 🤡💁‍♀️is it me or does he look like Hugh Jackman with that new beard

back to the blessed blorbos!

team super cam aw <3

OH NO U DONT TOUCH HER GIRL LIKE THAT

protective!bea i'm swooningg

journalist!yasmine is so cuteeee

CAMILLA UR CHASTITY HAHAHAHAHHAA

clutching my pearls but also yes girliE GET SOMEEEEEEEE

is that the fuckin,, lalisa sonf? v hype but ngl doesn't fuuully fit the scene But i'll let it slide :)

“well then warrior nun, see you on the other side” 😍😍

you tell me that won't be one of her affectionate nicknames once they settle down and have their happily ever after i DARE you-

“do you know how i know that adriel isn't god, vincent? because he chose to speak to you” OUCHHHHHHHHHH

ok i'm calling it now that pointy cross is hanging Very Ominously over the stage,.,,

adriel choosing to mimic the medici’s bastardised image of Jesus the irony is not lost on me :)

so uhhhhhh why does the halo only sputter out at plot relevant moments? *shakes writers in frustration*

LILITHS TEETH VAGINA COSTUME

i'm so sorry but lilith girl they did u so fucking dirty wtf is this shitty look costumes dept u were doing so wellllll TAT

oh dear ava 🥺

yall there’s nothing that hurts me more than a well laid plan going wrong

lilith hurtling off the roof - HAHAHAHAHA YEET BITCH

where tf was ava hiding her helmet???? up her-?

kristian: “let it go” ah ofc they planned for this

insert it’s a trap !!!!!!!! meme

i can’t watch thissssssddsddd

oh boy the cross tip hanging ever lower like the sword of Damocles

I CALLED IT

nooooo rest in pieces duretti shdhdhajahgdhd

jesus that's brutal,, gnarly counter: 2

michael: "god isn’t real" maybe the true message all along was atheism :)

CAMILLA AND HER GUNNNNNN BIG BRAINNNNNN

AVA DESCENDING LIKE THE REAL ANGEL SHE IS

vincent seeing her-

lilith ex machina swooping in-

OK MICHAEL GOT A STAB IN gnarly counter: 3 (once again loving the gore this season !)

BOTH ava and michael choosing to sacrifice themselves in that moment PLS NO

ooh love the millisecond yellow sheen on adriels eyes

sister ARMS- sorry- i meant sister dora HELLO THERE

“come on pretty boy” ahahshdhdksjagahaha bea ily

back at base

ok fess up who's the goddamn snitch

(small eyeroll at the 'oops i destroyed the macguffin detonator' trope)

SUPERION NO

NO

NO

(did she die ????)

never has a cross been so hateful as the one drawn in blood fuck you william u little dipshit

SUPERION NO 😭😭😭😭

did lilith just save ava by teleporting her

jahdkclcpsjsxnxoxmxnsiskncc

this episode took my heart and shredded it in a meat grinder

superion has shot up my favourites list this season and for her to end like that-

and duretti!

but mostly superion TAT i'm suing for her And mary >:(((

ANYWAY

not keeping calm and carrying on-

[extasiswings]

How we feeling clowns?  Wrecked?  Anyway, here, have an episode tag for both the crossover and Buck Begins.  Also on ao3.

Eddie’s driving nearly on autopilot, the roads familiar as they get closer and closer to El Paso. Part of him almost wishes he hadn’t taken the driving shift to get them to his childhood home, even if it made the most sense—he can feel the tension in his jaw and shoulders creeping in, curling tighter with every mile they come closer, and his fingers itch for his phone, for the commiserating sympathies of his sisters who understand what he’s likely to walk into much more than Buck or Hen. 

Technically they could have skipped the detour. Eddie hadn’t even planned on telling his parents he was coming to Texas at all—it was Christopher who let it slip, and then Eddie had been immediately put on the spot and he hadn’t been able to come up with a good way out of stopping by after his weak deflection that it wasn’t a social trip was met with well, you have to stop and eat somewhere, don’t you. 

Sophia told him to lie and say the department said no. But she’s always been much better at lying to their parents outright than he is. Adriana shrugged and said if he didn’t want to go he didn’t need to give them a reason and should just say he wouldn’t be coming. But then, that’s her tactic as well and always has been—putting her foot down to establish hard boundaries, forging her own path and bucking all expectations.  Eddie’s always fallen somewhere in the middle, which he supposes is fitting—struggling to set boundaries, often getting there only when pushed, wanting approval but lacking Sophia’s talent for gentle manipulation that usually leads people to think that whatever she wants was their idea. 

So. Here he sits. Driving to El Paso. 

“Eddie?”

He blinks and clears his throat as he registers Buck’s voice, the edge of concern that says it’s not the first time Buck has called his name. 

“Yeah?”

“I was going to ask if you could pass back the aux cord,” Buck says. “But now I think I should ask if you’re okay.”

Eddie glances over his shoulder—Hen is in the back of the truck, head pillowed against the window, dozing with her eyes closed.  He swallows. 

“It’s been awhile since I’ve seen my parents is all,” he replies. “And usually when they call it’s to talk to Christopher so...it might be uncomfortable.”

Buck’s voice drops. “Have you talked to them since the thing? Other than about this I guess.”

The Thing, also known as the huge fight they got into when Eddie decided that if he was going to keep working he couldn’t live at home for awhile and they tried to once again insist that he take Chris back to live with them. Like some terrible combination of the arguments they had before he moved to LA and after Shannon’s funeral, only even worse because Eddie had been raw enough over the decision to move in with Buck and let his abuela take care of Chris for awhile and really didn’t need to hear anyone tell him that choice made him a bad parent—

Sophia had been spitting mad when he told her and while he doesn’t know what she said in her own subsequent call to their parents, he knows that the next time they called him, the subject didn’t come up again.  Which, he supposes is as close to an apology as he’s ever likely to get.  

He probably could have used that as an excuse to not visit.  But then, that’s not really how they are.  Don’t apologize, pretend you don’t hold grudges, act like everything is fine, and repress until it feels like it is—the Diaz family way.  

Eddie sighs as he focuses on the road.

“Not really,” he replies.  “They’ve called Christopher every few weeks, but we’ve only talked directly...three times maybe since then?  Things seem to go south more quickly when we’re in person though so I guess I’m…”

“Bracing for impact,” Buck fills in quietly.  “I get that.”

“Yeah?”

Buck shrugs.  “I don’t talk about my parents,” he points out.  “Don’t talk to them either if I can avoid it because they always have a way of managing to just—anyway.  The last time I even called was after everything with Maddie and Doug.  Haven’t seen them since...since before I started with the 118 at least. So.  Yeah.  I get it.”

He hesitates, then adds, “You know I have your back, right?  You’re my best friend and you’re an amazing father.  I’m not going to let anybody get away with talking badly about you in front of me, even if they are your parents.”

Eddie glances back and manages a faint smile, some of the tension leaving his shoulders.  

“I’m glad you’re here,” he admits.  “Even if you did try to steal a fire truck in the middle of the night without me.”

Buck laughs and shoves at his shoulder.  “At least it wasn’t this truck.  Besides—you caught up before I did it anyway.”    

“Yeah, my Buck’s about to do something dangerous senses were tingling, couldn’t let that slide,” Eddie teases.

“Just give me the damn aux cord,” Buck shoots back, but he’s grinning.

And as they pass the next exit, Eddie feels like maybe things won’t be quite so bad.

***

Buck hates Eddie’s parents.  

It’s not the most charitable thing to think about someone you’ve only just officially met—he saw them at the ceremony when Eddie passed his probationary period, but he’d been on pretty strong painkillers at the time and Maddie had shuffled him back home as soon as possible—but he really does.

He hates the tense, anxious set of Eddie’s shoulders, hates the way his smile looks forced—it triggers the same fierce, protective instinct that rears its head whenever he gets between his parents and Maddie, and, well, he did promise, so—

He really doesn’t feel bad for interrupting the very first digs about how seeing Christopher over video isn’t the same as in person, but it’s nice to have the option and technology really is wonderful, Zoom calls must have been a great improvement from your army days, right son with—

“You know, it is wonderful isn’t it?  Did Eddie tell you how amazing Christopher is handling hybrid learning?  It’s really so great how his teachers have adapted, I can’t imagine he would have kept up so well anywhere else.”

Buck smiles brightly as Eddie’s mother’s lips thin.  Hen coughs and takes a long sip of lemonade.  Eddie blinks in surprise from across the table and clears his throat, grasping at the lifeline.

“Yeah, top of his class,” Eddie says.  

“He even has a reading group once a week with some of the other kids in his class that Eddie started to help them stay social.  I know a lot of the other parents appreciate it,” Buck adds, and Eddie rubs at the back of his neck.

“We definitely do,” Hen says, glancing at Eddie’s father as she clarifies, “I have a son Christopher’s age.  They used to play together all the time before all of this.”

“His therapist said kids are resilient, but I wanted to at least try and give him something normal,” Eddie replies, and his mother’s brows raise.

“Christopher is in therapy?”  There’s a note in her tone that makes Eddie tense and Buck’s hackles raise.

“I took him to see someone for a few sessions after Shannon died, mom,” Eddie says evenly.  After the tsunami, Buck fills in for himself.  “It didn’t seem like a bad idea to go back again to make sure he’s okay during a time that’s pretty unprecedented for just about everyone.” 

“Really, I think more parents should send their kids to therapy,” Buck interjects.  “If it’s a feasible option, I can’t see that it’s anything other than great parenting to make sure your kid has the best tools they can to take care of their mental health.”

God knows if he’d gone to therapy a hell of a lot sooner, he might not be struggling through sessions with Dr. Copeland now that he’s nearly thirty, but that’s not really the point.

“Well, some people feel those sorts of things are best taken care of within the family,” Eddie’s mother replies.

“With all due respect, sometimes the family’s way of handling problems just makes things worse,” Buck replies, his smile dropping briefly before he forces it back again.

“This lemonade really is delicious, Mrs. Diaz,” Hen jumps in as Eddie pushes his chair back and starts collecting empty plates.  “I would love to get the recipe before we leave.  If you don’t mind.” 

Startled, the older woman blinks.  “Oh.  Yes, of course.  I’ll write it down for you.”

Buck pushes back his own chair as Hen continues redirecting the conversation and follows Eddie into the kitchen where he finds his best friend gripping the edge of the sink.

“Hey,” he says quietly.  

Eddie looks over his shoulder and exhales heavily.  “Hey.”

“Sorry if I overstepped.”

“You didn’t,” Eddie assures.  “I’m just...exhausted.  And ready to get back on the road and home to my kid.”

He hesitates, then adds, “you know, my sisters would be impressed.  I haven’t seen someone manage our parents like that since they left.  I—thank you.”

“I meant what I said in the truck, Eddie,” Buck replies.  “You’re an amazing father and a great man and—it’s not right that anyone should pretend any different.  So.  I won’t let them.”   

Eddie glances at the hallway.  “Guess we have to go back eventually.  I didn’t quite think this escape plan through.”  

“Once more unto the breach?”  Buck offers.  The smile he gives Eddie is far different from the fake one he’s had up since they arrived, and when Eddie returns it, a spark returning to his eyes, it makes Buck’s stomach flip and his pulse race.

He tries not to think too hard about that.  They still have a long drive ahead of them—plenty of time to save it for later.    

“Yeah.  Yeah, okay.”

***

When they get home, Eddie barely manages to shower and plug in his phone to charge before falling into bed and immediately going to sleep.  When he wakes up, he finally checks his messages and sees several missed calls and texts from his sisters.

So? Sophia asks.  How was it?

<em>You were right</em>, Eddie taps out, and then waits. His phone rings a few seconds later. 

“I’ll save the I told you so in favor of asking if I should get Adriana on the line for an emergency Diaz sibling parental grievance vent session or if I’ll suffice,” Sophia greets. 

“It’s not that serious,” Eddie replies. “I’m okay—a little annoyed still, but...I’m okay.”

He’s not quite sure what compels him to add, “Buck was there. He, uh, he told them off about it a little actually. Politely, but that kind of polite...you know the one.”

“The one that’s basically go fuck yourself with a smile and/or plausible deniability?” Sophia fills in, and Eddie laughs. 

“Yeah, that.” He rubs at the back of his neck and leans back in his chair. “It was—he kept pointing out things about what a great dad I am.”

There’s something about the feeling in his gut that he can’t name. Something he wants to poke at, to explore, but that also makes him wary. Like a yellow caution light—it’s not a do not enter but it’s not risk free either—and he’s not sure whether it’s a risk he can take yet. 

Sophia is quiet for a moment. Then she says, “You are a great dad, Eddie. In spite of them. I’m glad you have other people in your life who recognize that too.  You deserve that.  You deserve to trust that you’re good at things, even if mom and dad say you aren’t.  You deserve to be happy, so...”

The silence that follows feels weighty.  

“What?”  Eddie asks.

“Is Buck—?”  Sophia cuts herself off.  “—nevermind.  Hey, the twins are calling, so I’ll call back again later, okay?  Love you.”

Is Buck what? Eddie wants to ask.  But he swallows it back.

“Love you, too,” he says instead.  “Talk to you later.”

As he hangs up and tosses his phone aside, his mind wanders back to that feeling.  Right up to the edge of warning lights and caution tape.  And Eddie wonders for a moment if he should—

There’s a knock at his door.  

“Dad?  You awake?”

“Yeah, buddy,” he calls back.  “Be right there.”

Later.  He can think about it later.  

***

Eddie figures it out at the worst possible time—in the middle of a five-alarm fire when Buck’s trapped inside and he doesn’t know if—

What do you do when you realize you might be in love with your best friend and they could die?

“We have to go back in there,” he says, before he can think of any reason why he shouldn’t.  “We can’t just leave him, we have to—”

“You’re right,” Bobby interrupts, and the other captain makes a noise of frustration.  

“Captain Nash—”

“You’re right,” Bobby repeats, holding Eddie’s gaze.  “We’re going to get him back.”

Maybe it’s stupid, four trained firefighters diving back into an active blaze in an unstable building with unclear direction, but Eddie can’t regret it when he sees the desperation on Buck’s face.  The relief.  The impending breakdown.

After, he’s assigned to take care of the victim and Buck’s carted off to the hospital to get checked, and Eddie thinks maybe that’s better.  It gives him time, at least.  Time to figure out what to say, what to do, whether he should say or do anything at all.  Part of him doesn’t know.  The rest is screaming I love him, I love him, I love him, wants to get his hands on Buck to verify for himself that he’s fine.  That he’s alive.  That he’s going to stay that way.

But when he gets back to the station, Buck’s parents are there, sitting at the table, and Eddie just—

He thinks about the look on Buck’s face earlier in the shift when he spilled everything, when he explained how he was apparently born just for parts and how he used to throw himself into bad situations because it was the only way to get their attention.

He could ignore them.  But he doesn’t.

“He saved my son, you know,” Eddie says, gripping the top of the staircase as the Buckleys look up.  And it’s probably somewhat insane to keep talking because he knows they don’t even know who he is, but he can’t help it because he just needs them to understand—  “Buck.  He wasn’t even working at the time, he was on medical leave and didn’t know if he would ever be able to be a firefighter again.  But he saved my son in the middle of a tsunami—my then eight-year-old son, and god knows I can’t imagine losing him, I think that would be the worst thing I could possibly go through, and I’m not sure I would survive it, but I didn’t have to because Buck saved him.  And probably twenty other people as well.  That’s just the kind of person he is.  The kind who saves people.”

They don’t say a word, so he keeps going.  “He could have died today.  Because he didn’t want to leave anyone behind.  Because he is a good man, even if he doesn’t ever feel like he’s good enough.  And he hasn’t said a lot about you, but he’s said enough for me to know that while he’s gotten the latter impression from you, he learned the former himself.  He built his life here himself.  So...I don’t know why you’re here, if you want to explain yourselves or just want him to forgive you because you feel guilty, but I just wanted you to know that.  That he’s a good man.  The best man that I know.  And if you’re proud of him for that, he deserves to hear it.  That’s all.”

Eddie walks away then, heart beating too fast, blood rushing in his ears.  

The best man that I know.  And I’m in love with him.

That wasn’t for their ears though.  

It thrums in his veins, the words caught in his throat as he showers, changes, waits for Buck to return to the station.  And when he does, Eddie almost—

But something stops him.  

“You have visitors,” he says instead.  And leaves Buck to it.

Buck finds him in the locker room after.

“So, my parents said they heard stories about me while they were waiting,” he says.  “When I asked them who from, they said they didn’t know, but that I saved their son in a tsunami—and trust me, that got a hell of a lot of questions.”      

Eddie is grateful for the open locker, the excuse to hide his face as he pulls out his street clothes.

“Yeah, well—just because they’re not going to appreciate you doesn’t mean that nobody else does.”

“Eddie.”

Eddie pulls back and takes a breath before looking over at Buck.  There’s a look in Buck’s eyes like he’s trying to piece Eddie together like a puzzle, to work out all the things he hasn’t said.  And Eddie suddenly feels exposed, far more than he had when Buck was sitting in his childhood dining room staring down his own parents.  

“You’re a good man,” Eddie says quietly.  “They should hear that.  And...someone should be willing to defend it.”  

Buck’s quiet for a moment.

“I have to go see Maddie,” he says finally.  “But maybe I could come by later?  And we could...talk?”

“You don’t have to ask, Buck,” Eddie replies.  “You know I—”  I always want you.  “—you’re always welcome.”

Buck watches him in silence for another long moment, then nods.  “Okay.  Okay, I’ll see you later then.”

It’s hours before there’s a knock on the door.  Hours in which Eddie burns dinner and then orders takeout because he’s too busy thinking, hours that he spends trapped in his own head, thinking through all the worst case scenarios, through every what if of how things could go wrong.

But also how they could go right.

And by the time he opens the door, he’s almost ready to just let the words trip off his tongue, but before he can, Buck says—

“Please don’t tell me I’m wrong about this.”

—and kisses him.

Eddie freezes, but before Buck can pull back, he slides a hand around the back of Buck’s neck and kisses him back with everything in him—every bit of thank god you’re alive and I was so afraid and I can’t lose you that he can muster.  By the time Buck pulls away, they’re both breathless. 

“I’m in love with you,” Buck admits.  “I’ve been—”

“Me too,” Eddie replies.  “I thought—I thought you were—”

Buck kisses him again.

“I can’t believe you told off my parents.”

“Well, you told off mine, so—”

Eddie pulls Buck through the door.

“Chris is in his room,” he says quietly.  “But...you should stay for dinner.  And…”

You should stay.  Just stay.

Buck does.  

[mattsboldyy]

The 24 Days in the Bubble | WJ Canada

CHAPTER 2 | RED DEER

-

Summary - The players, including Y/N get to Red Deer and start selection camp. Who gets cut? Relationships? Friendships? Y/N gets to get closer and meet the rest of the possible Team Canada players. Can Y/N survive the selection camp, much less quarantine.

Requested - No! The idea came from myself :)

Warnings - mentions of covid-19, masking, female reader, quarantining

Words - 1k

Requests - Open

Taglist: @2manytabsopen@prettyboyjackhughes @sorokns @ricohenrique @cherrylita @tonyspep @lovereadinghockeyy @only-goalies-allowed @hawksgirl1 @mysoftboybowen @hoespill 

Authors note- I got all of my information from google, websites, & from the documentary Team Canada put out based off of the 2021 Tournament therefore, some information that takes place in this series may be false, but just know that I got all my information from the documentary and the internet. Thank you and enjoy!

-

-

-

NOVEMBER 15, 2021

”Okay, you ready?” Kaiden asked, standing in the plane isle, waiting for you.

”Uhm.... now I am.” You said, grabbing your backpack, and started walking behind Kaiden to the front of the plane.

Even though you had only known Kaiden since you got on the plane, you two got along so well, it seemed like you and Kaiden have been best friends for two years. Kaiden really was sweet, and so were the rest of the guys.

”Okay guys... and girl, we are doing covid tests as soon as we get into the airport.” Coach André said.

”Hmm.. I wonder how that’s gonna go.” Kaiden said, walking next to you, laughing.

“I wonder how it’s gonna go too.” You said, laughing with him.

-

-

“They’re tickling my brain!” Jamie said as he was walking away from the covid testing table. Jamie’s comment made some of the guys giggle.

”Alright Kaiden, you’re up next.” André said, pointing to 1 of the 3 tables set up.

”Go get ‘em champ.” You said, giggling, and patting Kaiden on the back while he was walking away. You watched Kaiden get the test.. he didn’t even flinch. It shouldn’t be that bad.

”Okay, Y/N. Your turn.” Michael said, pointing to a testing table.

”Hi sweetie!” The lady that was testing you said.

”Hi!” You said nervously.

”My name is Shannon. I’m going to swab your nose, I promise it isn’t as scary as it seems!” Shannon said, laughing.

”Nice to meet you! Okay.“ You said, closing your eyes as she swabbed your nose which made you cough.

”Okay! You’re all done! Thank you and good luck!” Shannon said, putting the swab in a tube and then into a box.

”Thank you!“ You said, picking up your backpack and walking over to Kirby, Jamie, & Kaiden.

“How was that, eh?” Kirby said, elbowing you.

You laughed. ”It felt like they were sticking a pipe up my brain.. so not great.“

”Well you did great.” Kaiden said, high-fiving you wish made you laugh.

-

“Alright we have the busses ready to go.” André said, pointing to the door that leads out to the parking lot where 2 busses were waiting to transport you and your possible teammates to the hotel you all were staying at in Red Deer.

You took your hockey back, sticks, backpack, and suitcase and headed for the busses. When you got to the busses, a very kind lady handed you a wipe and a bottle of hand sanitizer to wipe down the seat on the bus.

“Thank you!” You said to the lady, smiling through your mask.

”Oh no problem! Good luck at camp!” The lady said.

You stepped into the bus and chose a seat. You put in your airpods and started listening to music as the boys started talking. The nerves were really kicking in. You were imagining how embarrassing it would be to blow the chance of being on Team Canada. You looked out the window. You were going to be fine. Hopefully.

—

As the bus pulled up to the hotel, you could see people holding signs and cheering on team Canada. It made you smile. You were glad team Canada was giving you a chance.

”Okay guys, please get off the bus and we’ll tell you what room you’re having.” André said.

All the guys got up, Kirby and Kaiden waiting for you in the isle.

”Are you nervous for camp tomorrow?” Kirby asked, walking beside you after coming off the bus.

”I’m the first possible girl to be on Team Canada. Yes I’m nervous!” You said, making Kaiden and Kirby laugh.

”Nah. You’ll do great.” Kaiden said, elbowing you.

”We’ll see.” You said, opening the hotel main doors.

—

After you got into your hotel room, you unpacked and called your parents.

”Hi sweetie!” Your mom said.

”Hey mom.” You said, putting your phone between your head and shoulder as you opened your closet and hung your clothes up on hangers.

”How’s it going so far?” Your dad asked.

”Well, I had a pipe stuck up my nose and into my brain,-” You said before your brother interrupted you and saying “Wait, really?” He asked.

”No you idiot. It was a covid test.” You said, shaking your head.

”Alright be nice you two. Well Y/N, we won’t keep you. Good luck at camp tomorrow and keep us updated! Love you!” Your mom said.

”Yep, I will. Love you too.“ You said, hanging up the phone and then tossing your phone on the bed.

You had just turned on the TV and flipping through the stations when you heard a text message come from your phone.

Kaiden Guhle :)

’Hey, it’s Kaiden. I’m already bored.’

Me

’i’ve been bored the second I walked into this hotel room lol’

Kaiden Guhle :)

’Wanna facetime?’

Me

’duhhhh 😎’

—

You and Kaiden FaceTimed for a good hour before he suggested you both get some rest for camp tomorrow.

You liked Kaiden. As a friend. Right?

[elisela]

in a language you can understand buck x eddie, g, 2k, for anon who asked for Eddie buying little gifts for Buck and hiding them in his work bag

--

He blames it on hour twenty-three of a twenty-four hour shift when what comes out of his mouth after Chim tosses a bag of Skittles at his face is “I bet I could fit all these in my mouth at once.”

Hen shakes her head, Chim snorts, but Buck narrows his eyes and leans his elbows on the table, pulling himself as close to Eddie as he can get without climbing over the thing. “Coward,” he says, his mouth quirking into a grin, “I bet I could fit two.”

“Not at the station,” Bobby says, sounding bored. “There’s too much paperwork involved if one of you becomes injured on the job, even if it’s your own fault.”

“No, definitely at the station,” Hen says. “There’s more work involved if we have to break in a new probie because one of you idiots chokes to death.”

The conversation drifts, and Eddie forgets about it until he’s at the grocery store later, ignoring the way his son sticks out his lower lip as he begs for a candy bar. When Chris picks up a bag of Skittles, Eddie sighs and says yes, then throws two more bags on the conveyor belt when Chris isn’t looking.

He hides them in Buck’s work bag the next day.

---

“Skip-It,” Hen says, looking wistful. “My neighbor had one when I was a kid and I swear, I used to stare at her for hours when she’d play in the courtyard. I wanted one so badly.”

“Couldn’t you just … skip?” Buck asks, looking confused. “You needed a toy for that?”

Hen rolls her eyes. “It went around your ankle,” she says. “Here, I’ll google it for you.”

“What about you, Cap?” Chim asks, as Buck leans his head in towards Hen to peer at her phone. “Which childhood toy did you miss out on?”

Bobby tilts his head for a moment. “Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots,” he says, refocusing on the pan in front of him. “My Mom thought they were too violent. She’d have a lot to say about what kids are playing with now.”

“Oh, don’t start us on the ‘kids these days’ speech,” Buck groans. “Quick, Eddie, distract him.”

“Uhh,” Eddie says, thinking—he’s sure there are there plenty of toys he’d begged for but never received, but clearly his parents had been right when they said he’d forget about them because he can’t recall a single one, except—“moon shoes,” he says, and at Buck and Hen’s blank look, he appeals to Chim. “You know, they were about four inches tall, like mini-trampolines? My parents said I’d break my ankle.”

“They were probably right,” Buck says. “You know how many calls we get because of trampoline accidents.”

“Alright, Bambi,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Most of us have control over our own limbs. What’s yours, then?”

Buck shrugs. “It’s kinda stupid, but there weren’t any kids in our neighborhood and Maddie wasn’t really into stuff like this, but you remember that game where you had like—a velco glove? And you’d catch a tennis ball?”

“Magic Mitt,” Chim says, snapping his fingers. “I wanted one of those, too. I should buy one for the baby.”

“I’d pay to see a three month old who could catch,” Hen says at the same time as Buck snorts and says, “I bet Maddie will love you throwing a tennis ball at Joy’s head.”

Three weeks later, Eddie’s gently pushing Chris out of the dollar section at Target when he spots a round velcro disc with a tennis ball attached in a bin full of summer games. He grabs two; one gets tossed on the back porch with the rest of Christopher’s outdoor toys, and the other goes in his work bag until it can be transferred to Buck’s locker.

----

The thing is, Eddie’s been in love with Buck for … well. He’d felt something for him right away, the type of attraction that goes beyond surface level, the pull towards another person’s soul, all of Buck’s goodness a lit beacon that illuminated Eddie’s way back to being whole. It was just never the right time, not with all his insecurities, Buck’s insecurities—every time Eddie thought maybe, the universe said not yet. His common sense gave way to guilt when Shannon reappeared, all of Buck’s near-death experiences, the way he so easily lost control of himself when what anchored him was suddenly gone.

It’s not that he thinks they don’t have what it takes to go the distance, but after Shannon—he’s more cautious now. He knows relationships take work and he’s willing to put that in, but he also knows how easily things break, and he’s not about to lose the one shot he has with Buck, so he’s just … waiting for the right time.

It’s probably been the right time for awhile now, but somehow, despite Hen and Chim’s ongoing conversation about who will ask out who first that regularly takes place in front of him (Buck, they unanimously decided), he hasn’t been able to go through with it.

----

After that, it’s little rubber toys that grow in water (shaped like a fireman and a fire truck), a candle that smells like lemon (because Buck had peeled one and eaten it like an orange the week before), a pack of two half-gallon, brown glass jars with “coffee” written on the side after a week that Buck worked three 36 hour shifts, a mini-waffle maker, a jar of Nutella (which Eddie had then been forced to watch Buck lick—so very slowly—off a spoon, an image which had not left his mind for several very long, lonely weeks), a packet of stickers that was surely meant for teachers but Buck immediately started giving out to everyone at the station (Eddie had laughed himself silly at the look on Chim’s face when Buck slapped one of a unicorn that said “great job!” on his uniform shirt and said “great job dating my sister!”), notebooks and silly pens—for months, every time he saw something small and cheap that made him think of Buck, he’d buy it and find a way to hide it in Buck’s bag or locker.

Buck never says anything, but Eddie watches the way his eyes crinkle at the corners when he finds something, the way his smile softens into something more private and tender, sees how Buck makes sure he shows whatever it is off in front of Eddie—chugging cold brew straight out of the coffee bottle before he makes a face at the bitter taste, spends hours on the couch playing hangman with Hen in the notebooks, handing her the blue pen with the googly-eyed flamingo on top and keeping the one shaped like a shark for himself, trying to keep a straight face while his shoulders shake with laughter as Bobby reprimands both of them for shooting their coworkers with squirt guns while they run around the fire station. He doesn’t need Buck to say anything—he likes that he doesn’t, that it’s just something between the two of them that Buck doesn’t make into a big deal.

It goes on for so long that it’s almost second nature to pick something up for Buck whenever he goes shopping, and gradually, the gifts get a little more—intentional. A tie-dye hoodie after he sees a picture of an eight year old Buck wearing one (and a matching one for Chris), a “world’s best uncle” mug after Buck worries that Albert sees Joy more than he does and she might start to prefer him, a Greek cookbook after the fifth time they go out to the new restaurant in his neighborhood (Eddie might get more out of that than Buck does considering the sheer amount of baklava that starts appearing at the station—Eddie’s favorite treat).

As it turns out, he thinks about Buck a lot.

-----

“Sasha says you have to get your best friend an extra special Halloween treat,” Chris says, looking over the row of candy carefully.

“Sound like Sasha wants better candy,” Eddie says, grabbing a bag of caramel apple suckers for the station.

And maybe for himself.

Chris gives him a look. “Sasha’s not my best friend,” he says, turning back to the candy. “Buck is.”

“Well, can’t stand in the way of that,” he says. “Go ahead and pick something out.”

Chris finally hands him a bag of fancy marshmallows shaped like mummies, and peers into the cart. “What’d you get him this time?”

Eddie stares at him.

“You always get him something,” Chris says. “He’s your best friend, too, you need to get him something extra special. Hey, maybe you should tell him to get me something special, too.”

“Like he needs any more encouragement,” Eddie says.

On their way through the bakery aisle, he spots frosted cookies with phrases piped onto them; he grabs a witch that says “you’re bewitching” on it, and puts it in Buck’s locker just before the end of their shift.

Buck smiles all the way out to his Jeep.

-----

The week after, it’s a travel coffee mug that says “I think you’re spooktacular” that Buck carries with him on every call for three shifts before Chim puts it in the top rack of the dishwasher and it melts the side.

The pout on Buck’s lips pleases Eddie a little too much. So when he’s browsing the shelves at Target, waiting for Chris to find a costume he finds suitable that is also school appropriate and finds another Halloween themed cup—this time, with “Will you be my boo?” written on it, he only hesitates for a moment before putting it in the cart.

He doesn’t build up the courage to put it in Buck’s bag for two weeks—it’s not until Eddie notices the way that his face falls after six shifts with nothing new appearing in his locker that he shoves it in Buck’s bag after a shift, when Buck runs upstairs to give something to Chim.

They’re saying goodbye to Hen when Buck turns towards him suddenly. “I have something for Chris,” he says, and Eddie’s anxiety spikes when Buck sets his bag down and opens it up. He stares at the cup for a long time, then looks up at Eddie, glances at Hen, and smiles. “Hey, Eddie,” he says, “you wanna go out to dinner with me tomorrow? Like—a date?”

Hen’s bag hits the floor.

“Oh, no,” Eddie says, shaking his head as Buck’s mouth twitches. “No, you don’t get to take credit for this, I practically—that counts as me asking,” he says, waving towards the bag. “I asked you.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Buck says, tossing a paper bag at him before standing up and clapping him on the shoulder. “Pick you up at six?”

“I’ll pick you up because I asked you,” he says, looking over at Hen. “I did. Show her the cup, Buck.”

“Dress warm, we’re going to a corn maze,” Buck says, skipping backwards with a wink. “And grab some blankets for your truck!”

-----

The week after their first date, there’s a small framed picture sitting in his locker—Buck with his arm around Eddie’s shoulders at the corn maze, their smiling faces lit by the bonfire, a bottle of beer dangling from Buck’s fingers. The lettering on the frame says “thankful for you” with a tiny leaf etched next to it.

Eddie sets it out on their reception table two years later.

[word-scribbless]

Family Part 2

Part 2! I’m not sure if I’ll do more. I feel like I could probably think of more sweet storylines for them, and more about the fostering stuff.

This is a gibbs x female reader it also includes an OC, Cori.

(Italics mean the character is signing. In most cases, they are speaking as well, except for Cori.)

Masterlist

Part 1

———

Cori had been with Gibbs and Y/N for a week when Gibbs and the team solved the case. Having Cori with them felt perfect. Y/N took a few days off from work to be with Cori. they went shopping, read Harry Potter together, and cooked dinner each night. It was summer, so when Y/N had to go into work cori went to Y/N’s brother’s house with her nieces, but they spent almost every day together. Y/N discovered that Cori loved baking so she let her pick something to bake each evening.

When y/n was younger she had dreamed of having a daughter. When she got engaged all those years ago, they had talked about having a family, but that dream died with her fiancé, Connor. Since then she pushed it away, along with her hope for love. Until she met Jethro. She knew they probably wouldn’t have children, at least not biologically, but the family the two of them were together was enough. He showed her so much love and passion that she knew she’d always be happy.

Having Cori in their lives just made their little family even better. Jethro walked through the door after a hard days work to the sound of y/n and cori each night. He came home each of the 5 nights to his girls making dinner for him in the kitchen, dancing along to the radio and engulfing him in hugs when they saw him.

For the first couple of days cori was still a bit skiddish around Gibbs, being she wasn’t used to trusting males besides her father who she lost at a young age. However by the third day she felt like she’d known and trusted Gibbs her whole life. It helped that he left it up to her to how much she trusted him, constantly giving her the option of y/n being around too. One night she asked if she could come help him work on his boat and he knew then she trusted him as much as y/n. That night she hugged him goodnight and he knew his life would never be the same.

He knew that as long as he had Y/N his life would be greater than he ever thought it could be after he lost his original girls. However he was growing to love having Cori around. He loved her spirit and silliness, how she trusted them enough to use her quiet voice around the house. Most of all he loved seeing y/n as a ‘mom’. It made him love her even more if that was possible. It scared him to think about what was going to happen when the case was solved.

They’d have to tell the social worker, who would come to put Cori back into the system. Each day he had been dreading it and thinking about what he could do to make it so she could stay. He knew he had to bring it up with y/n, but she beat him to it one night just after dinner when Cori had gone to read in her room.

“Jethro we need to talk about what happens with Cori when the case is over.” Y/n said seriously as she sat down next to him on the couch.

“I know but I really don’t want to think about it.” He answered honestly

“I don’t want her to leave J.”

“Does she have to?” He asked

“What?” Y/N responded, her head snapping up to look at him.

“Well if she wants to stay why can’t she?”

“You want to adopt Cori?” She said moving closer to him.

“Yes, y/n.” He says grabbing her hands in his. “This; you, me , cori, it feels like a family and I want that with you and her.

You know I love you. You know I’m not one for words, but I know that you know how I feel.” He said in a low voice, squeezing her hands.

“Of course” she said reaching up to stroke his cheek with her thumb.

“ I never thought I could be so happy with anyone besides Shannon and Kelly. But with you and Cori...it not the same, but it’s just as strong. It’s our own happiness and I love it. I don’t want it to end. No matter what happens you and I are a family Y/N but it feels like she’s part of it too. He admitted emotionally.

“I love you. And her. I always told myself I didn’t need a family if I couldn’t have it with Connor. But then I met you. You became my family and having Cori with us... I just, I love seeing you as a dad. Your love for her and how much you care about us both makes my life complete and I realize that all the sad things in my life brought me here. Just like all the sad things in cori’s life brought her here. I think she belongs with us J.” She said as tears glided down her cheeks.

“Me too” he whispered wiping her tears “and I’ll fight to keep her here if that’s what she wants.”

“It is” they hear whispered from the other room as Cori stepped out from behind the wall.

“I want you to be my family!” She signed before she ran towards them.

Gibbs pulled both Cori and Y/N into a tight hug. All three of them had tears in their eyes at that point.

The next day, the case was officially closed and Jethro called the social worker. He explained that he and his wife were interested in permanently fostering and eventually adopting Cori. He swore he could hear the social worker smile through the phone.

It wasn’t every day a child lost everyone close to her and found another loving family. The social worker explained the process to jethro and promised to email the paper work. It wasn’t all going to be easy and the state would have to come do various in depth evaluations and interviews, but she assured him she thought it would work out if they were sure. He assured her they were serious about keeping Cori with them and ended the call with a smile.

As he hung up he turned around to see tony standing in the doorway.

“You look happy boss, it’s weird” tony laughed.

“Yeah, that’s been happening a lot lately” Gibbs joked back.

“So are you gonna keep this whole kid thing a secret too?” Tony asked earning a Gibbs glare.

“You know we would have all been happy about it right?” Tony asked pointing at the gold band Gibbs now proudly wore on his left hand.

Gibbs smile slightly.

“I know, and we would have told you. We just...”

“yeah I know, you’re you. Not a sharer.” The younger agent said causing his boss to nod.

“But you’ve got a lot of great things worth sharing Gibbs.” He continued.

“Yeah, yeah I do. I just like keeping them both to myself sometimes.” Gibbs admitted. “But you’re right, they’re worth bragging about.” He admitted causing tony to smile at his boss. “But right now I gotta get home to ‘em.”

Gibbs knew y/n would insist on celebrating with all of them once things were settled. right now, though, all he wanted was to get home and tell his sweet girls the good news. It might not be an easy road, but the three of them were going to do whatever they needed to stay a family.

“Hey girls” Gibbs greeted as he walked in the door.

“We’re in here!” Y/N shouted back.

He turned into the kitchen to find them both covered in flour, holding out a giant cake they had made for him with a messy “we love you” scrolled on top.

His heart clenched in his chest as he stood there looking at the two people he loved most in this world.

“We made you a cake since we know you had a long week and we wanted to thank you for fighting for us” Cori signed as she walked over to hug him.

“Thank you sweetheart” he said hugging her back. His eyes locked with y/n’s tearful ones as he mouthed ‘ I love you’ to her over cori’s head. She signed it back to him as she set the cake down and joined them in a hug.

“I talked to the social worker today” Gibbs said causing Cori to perk up.

“Oh yeah?” Y/N asked, knowing that he wouldn’t bring it up in front of Cori if there was no hope.

“ it won’t be easy, or a quick process” he smirked “but it’s possible. I’ve already started the paperwork.”

“Really!?” Cori whispered “you’re sure?”

Y/ N nodded at her “so sure”

“There’s nothing I’m more sure of than you two” Gibbs admitted. Pulling them back in.

[cattles-bians]

damie vibecca exes au part 20

post directory

obsetress: ok but when they first meet

obsetress: at that bar on whatever night or whatever

obsetress: when dani and viola are talking

obsetress: viola's waving her hand around as she says something and dani's staring and then totally out of nowhere:

obsetress: "wanna compare hands?"

obsetress: "what?"

obsetress: "lemme see your hand"

obsetress: and dani is grabbing one of vi's with both of hers and pulling it towards her "like this"

obsetress: and then dani's pressing their palms together and viola's raising an eyebrow and dani just GRINS and then even once they lower their hands back to the bar, neither of them move away

em: dani is SO bold i would die for her

obsetress: god same

obsetress: dani keeps glancing down at them as they're talking and she is NOT subtle

obsetress: viola catches her every time

em: maybe dani gets a smidge of smthn on the corner of her mouth and viola...

obsetress: viola pulls her hand away and dani blinks and her brows do that lil thing but then viola's murmuring "here" and grazing her thumb along the corner of dani's mouth

obsetress: dani squeaks

em: love when dani gets out dani’d

obsetress: viola's like "sorry, was that... was that okay?" and dani just swallows and nods with big shining eyes and then vi kinda hesitates and (they've been talking for a couple hours at this point, touchin hands and obv v into each other) lets her thumb graze across dani's bottom lip and she murmurs "what about that?" and dani's eyes flutter shut

obsetress: cut to: them making out in the bathroom

obsetress: no um

obsetress: thinking about vi and dani's first kiss and like

obsetress: maybe like right after that up there vi's leaning in closer and i think she. asks dani "can i kiss you?" and dani's whispering "please" and then they're kissing all soft and THEN cut to: them making out in the bathroom and one of them slamming back against the door and kissing hard

em: dani whispering please…

em: also the smash cut between um nervous anticipation and SLAMMING against a door is so funny to me

em: sums them up

obsetress: RIGHT

obsetress: it's so good i love them

obsetress: i cant decide like

obsetress: because i don't think vi would be so rough with dani at first as to shove her hard against a door and i DO think dani would be shoving her against the door and her tongue down her throat first chance she gets

obsetress: but i think vi prob flips them p quick

---

em: i am. creasing thinking abt dani having to rename all of violas contacts like STOP FUCKING UR EX

obsetress: STOP FUCKING UR EX lskfjakdlsfjsd even BETTER

obsetress: edit the tumblr post coward

em: obsetress: no um dani definitely calls the landline once and viola's like "HELLO?" and dani's like "hi?" and viola's so glad to hear her dumb voice but she's still like "dani, why are you..." and dani's like "well... i, uh... i... i was... and then i..."

obsetress: anyway they have phone sex on the landline

em: CRYIN

em: danis blocked all of vis numbers except the landline shes down Bad

obsetress: yeah,

obsetress: (dani still comes over after)

em: unstoppable force (danis thirst) meet immovable object (violas stubbornness)

obsetress: just imagining like

obsetress: i mean either after this or at literally any other time

obsetress: dani and viola laying side by side in vi's bed catching their breath immediately after and viola's just like

obsetress: "you have the libido of a teenage boy"

obsetress: and dani's head just flops to the side to look at her and she just GRINS

em: dani makes some quip abt um

em: danis like i read somewhere women don’t hit their sexual peak until their 40s or something and violas like (extremely tersely) i’m 35

obsetress: SCREECH

obsetress: dani "no, i... i know, i wasn't–– i was just––"

obsetress: viola can't stay pressed w her

em: dani tryna explain her way outta that one i’m

em: dani has never once seen violas drivers license nor ID

obsetress: "i was just... saying, because, you know, i mean... for me, i'm... you know, i'm only ever getting more..." (flush, head duck, grin up through her lashes) "you know. and i'm getting older, so i was just... thinking. for me, i mean. thinking for me"

em: dani; also i give WAY better head than a teenage boy

obsetress: viola biting her lip, grinning, melting because how could you not? and then dani kinda stops in her tracks and her brows pinch together and she tilts her head at viola "i'm... a lot better at going down on you than a teenage boy though, right? i think i am" (long pause) "i hope i am"

obsetress: anyway viola laughs and tugs dani over n on top of her "i wouldn't know" and dani does her lil nervous laugh and is like "yeah, you're right, i guess not" "but" and dani's face lights up and viola continues "i think you probably are. and you're definitely up there" and dani just GRINS

obsetress: her head is back between vi's legs not three minutes later

em: dani talks big game n then like immediately double checks for validation

em: it’s an important part of her character growth!!!

---

em: ok more ‘viola has been doing this lesbian thing for longer than jamie realises’ content but like

em: perhaps she has a whole lot of ear piercings that she just never wears

em: and then one day she’s like gosh gotta make sure these don’t heal over and jamies like

em: hey what the fuck

---

obsetress: um suddenly had a thought

obsetress: viola tattoos

em: oh

obsetress: yeah, like um

obsetress: vi wouldn't have heaps and they'd be hidden bc Propriety but

em: hidden tattoos my beloved

em: all tattoos my beloved

em: i mean defs has like. the date and coordinates of isabels birth somewhere

em: but um! hmm

em: haha violets

obsetress: THE ISABEL THING WAS THE FIRST THING I WAS GONNA SAY

obsetress: violets are very vi tho like

obsetress: shade plant yk

em: under the tit

obsetress: I WAS GONNA SAY UNDER THE TIT

obsetress: GET OUTTA MY HEAD

obsetress: ok it has to be canon then if we both thought it

em: it’s canon!!

em: hmm what else

em: i think viola and dani have belly button piercings but like they got them separately

obsetress: omg when did they each get theirs

em: hmmmmmm

em: i mean wild child rich heiress viola (untapped potential here won’t lie)

obsetress: wild child rich heiress viola/boarding school wild child dani au

em: oh my god

em: viola defs went to a boarding school and dani n her commiserate over it

em: viola gets it done while she’s in highschool

em: dani post eddie break up

em: like symbolically reclaiming herself deal

em: doing things for Her

obsetress: YES

obsetress: i was gonna say vi highschool dani college

em: YES

em: idk what tattoos dani would get but am thinking abt viola holding her hand while she’s getting a tattoo or piercing done bc she’s braver than ppl think but Also

obsetress: vi holding dani's hand and telling her how good a job she's doing

obsetress: dani kissing vi's tattoos

obsetress: super fascinated even though shes seen them a hundred times

em: danis like haha and what’s this one mean (plants a big old smooch)

---

obsetress: Shananigans402: dani putting on 4 inch heels and being so content that she's finally her girlfriend's height and then viola kisses her before putting on 6 inch heels with a smug little grin

obsetress: i––

em: oh my god shannon

obsetress: oh shes on one

obsetress: Shananigans402: dani starts keeping things on a high shelf in her place just so she can ask viola to reach up to get them down for her

obsetress: i was talking to shan abt the shelf thing

obsetress: and i played myself i think

obsetress: because now i literally cannot stop thinking

obsetress: dani putting the strap on the top shelf in her closet "baby 🥺 can you get it 🥺"

---

[em note: once again it is the time honored timezone tradition of either sending ur friend something really good or really fucked up b4 they go to sleep]

em: what about

em: jamie and dani laying in bed after brunch w violas excessive amount of ear jewellery and jamies like ‘those were cool. i want some’ and danis like ‘with ur tiny lil ears??’ and jamies like ‘well. yeah…’ and danis like well. if u wanna. i think one would be cute here (mwah) and here (mwah) or maybe here (mwah)

em: ticklish jamie. that is my lil idea

obsetress: im Soft

em: thankyou

em: em softsbians

em: what was ur lil idea

obsetress: oh

obsetress: not obsoftress

obsetress: but um

em: look i was really hoping i could make it hornier but alas sometimes the idea is soft

em: can’t force the horny

obsetress: i will do my job n delivery the horny for u i suppose

obsetress: it's a hard job but somebody's gotta do it!

em: it’s a thankless job!

obsetress: dani, sneaking up behind viola to wrap her arms around her waist and bury her face between her shoulder blades: baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

obsetress: dani, laying on the bed, staring up at her, panting: baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

obsetress: dani, pulling away mid-heated makeout, half naked, still grinding into vi even tho they're not kissing anymore without even realizing it: baby baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

obsetress: dani, catching her breath after her first orgasm, letting her head flop to the side to look over at vi: baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

em: insatiable dani clayton my beloved

obsetress: thank you i agree

obsetress: something about dani calling vi baby also........................

em: oh i love dani calling vi baby SO MUCH

em: fucked up that dani clayton is potentially just the right height to motorboat vi pretty much whenever

em: sappho may u plant ur self face first into the breast of ur tender gf or whatever

em: dani: haha i’m so short i can’t reach it. can u lift me

obsetress: vi sees thru all of dani's little tricks but entertains them anyway

obsetress: because she knows shes gonna get to rail her at the end of them

em: dani being a little shit is foreplay actually clayton

em:

[renohasbigtits]

Omg your Iggy mpreg headcanon is so gooooddd! Will you consider to do another Iggy mpreg headcanon which takes place in the true ending?

Mpreg Ignis (Final Fantasy 15: True Ending Version)

AHAAHAHAHAH! I can’t believe that people really like the Mpreg Ignis Headcanon! Thank you so much!

Something you guys have probably noticed by now is that I’m not a huge fan of the true ending.

Not saying it’s bad, I just don’t like how:

•Noct dies

•Iggy is blind

•Ravus dies

I also don’t agree with the assumption that the alternative ending is a “happier ending” because Luna is still dead.

But I digress, I don’t think the ending is bad. it’s just not my favorite ending.

But I will do it. I will give the people what they want!

To make this one different than the Alternative ending this one will have;

•Ignis is Blind :(

•Noctis is dead (also Ravus)

•Ignis has his own restaurant because of course he should!!!

I guess this takes place two years after The light is restored. Idk you change that if ya want to.

Apologies if it’s similar to the Alternative version, I did try my best to make this one different!

Yes it’ll albaby’s are default Female but you can change it if you want to!

Alright alright, less talking, Let’s go!

(this does contain Mpreg =Male Pregnancy. Don’t like? Don’t read!)

•Look

•this man is a lot of things (hotter than satan is one of em.)

•but happy isn’t really one of them rn.

•Just broken up with his long time partner.

•things aren’t going well for him...

•than suddenly he’s getting sick!

• certain smells bother him, he’s throwing up every morning.

•it’s gotten to the point where he can’t really cook anymore at his restaurant. And he now has to supervise.

•not that it’s a huge issue since there are other amazing cooks there to help but Ignis does not like sitting on the sidelines.

•than a female co-worker, Shannon, asks Iggy what’s wrong, he tells her that he has a “strange illness”

•she asks what the symptoms are

•tiredness

•morning sickness

•Smell sensitivity

•Mood swings

•than she starts giggling.

•”Ignis, I’m a chef but I’m also a Mother of 3 kids.”

• “What are you imply, Pray tell?”

•”I think your Pregnant. You have the classic symptoms.”

•Ignis was dumbfounded. 𝘞𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘨𝘯𝘢𝘯𝘵?

•He made a Doctors appointment.

•After what feels like 𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘴, The Doctor comes back with the results.

•”Mr Scientia, The results are in. You are Pregnant! Congratulations!”

•Ignis was not one to be speechless but this...

•he wasn’t sure what to do!!

•he wasn’t sure if he was ready for Parenthood.

•He was Blind and he couldn’t never see what his child would look like.

•or, if it was the right time....

•so he turned to his friends, Prompto and Gladiolus, for help.

•Prompto had to ask if Iggy’s joking

•he wasn’t obviously

•Gladio asks if Ignis has tried to get the other parent involved.

•Ignis did tried to do that.

•it didn’t go well...

•the other parent outwardly admitted that they did not want to be in the baby’s life.

•Well Fuck

•Poor Ignis (someone hug him 🥺)

•Prompto and Gladiolus, being the best friends they are decided then and there, that there gonna help Ignis, no matter what decision he makes.

•Shannon, the coworker in question, steps up and offers Ignis tips on pregnancy, since she knows it can be stressful, especially with your first one.

•Ignis really appreciates it.

•she’s also leads when Ignis has a doctors appointment or is too sick to be there.

•8 Weeks: Ignis + Pregnant = Moody Ignis

•Little things bother him more than usual.

•Ignis almost Lashed out Prompto because he did something that annoyed him.

•Shannon assured Prompto that this is just a mood swing and that he didn’t mean it.

•at this point, Ignis and Shannon have started become close due to the fact that she’s basically has become his right hand man (or woman)

•Her helping more also has taken any stress Iggy has had about it off his chest.

•Ignis couldn’t be more greatful.

•12 weeks: a small bump has started to show. So adorable!

•And of course, ya know Prompto is gonna take SO.MANY.PICS of Ignis’s bump growing.

•he’s gonna scrapbook it (rip his sd card tho)

•lris already has started making baby clothes. Girl clothes.

•15 weeks: You thought he was a mom before? Oh you ain’t seen nothing yet!

•he acts real fatherly (or motherly) to the youngest employee at the restaurant.

•good thing to because the poor guy is always a nervous reck.

•he has talent but very little confidence. So Ignis assuring him, helps a lot.

•Shannon is now basically his iggy’s real hand man (or woman)

•she helps, even when Ignis’s there.

•not just in work, but in his pregnancy too (I swear. I did not mean to create a character)

•giving him tips, things to help him, with baby supplies to buy. She’s the real mvp.

•(let’s skip a little)

•20 Weeks: Ignis has already started to feel her move. It 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 his heart. (I’ll see myself out 🚪)

•All joking aside, he was genuinely touched (that wasn’t a pun. I swear!) by feeling her kick.

•At this point, Ignis had already found out it’s a girl. (Again, you can change it if ya want to.)

•much to lris’s delight.

• THATS IT! HE’S MAKING A BUN IN THE OVEN! (>:)

•lord take the wheel....

• he tries to control himself, when it comes to his strange cravings (like pickles with peanut butter?? Wtf???)

•but he gives in when no one’s looking.

•𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘯 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘰

•”I Noticed Ignis.”

•”I don’t know why you are referring to.”

•25-28 weeks: he’s already getting bigger (don’t say that to his face tho.)

•if you think his work is being put on hold while being very pregnant, you clearly have never met Ignis.

•of course, he is being a little more easy on himself. Not walking around as much and Shannon makes a lot more decisions (with iggy’s trust)

•but he is a workaholic, so he’s working til he takes maternity leave.

•(I’m really trying to add Gladio to the story but lol)

•Prompto is already getting a new sd card cause he’s taking SO.MANY.PREGNANCY. PICS.

• “Prompto, if you don’t take any unnecessary pictures, you wouldn’t have to buy another sd car-

•”I AM NOT DELETING ANY OF THIS PICS MR MOM!”

•32 Weeks (I’m trying not to make this boring lol): He’s still working!!

•Ain't nothin' gonna break-a my stride, Nobody gonna slow me down!

•Shannon starts to get a bit worried.

•”Sir. I believe that you should take a break. Please”

•Ignis looked at his right hand and smile. “I should. Thank you Shannon.”

•36 weeks: He feels 𝘵 𝘪 𝘳 𝘦 𝘥

•his poor swollen feet :(

•thankfully, lris is secretly planning a baby shower.

•Everyone is coming.

•Shannon distracting him until she’s called to bring him over.

•when Ignis sees this, he’s tears up.

•"𝘪𝘧 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘕𝘰𝘤𝘵 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦."

• he gets so many adorable gifts.

•Prompto gets him a Chocobo Plush (classic)

•Gladio gets him a toy dagger. This son of a Bit-

•”Hey, you are never too early to start training!”

•Shannon got him a baby mobile.

•lris gotten him more baby clothes. Yay....(Am I the only one who can’t stand getting clothes as a gift?)

• lris had made an adorable cake. In his mind, Iggy admitted that she was as good as he was.

•this mf still working around the restaurant from his office.

•”Igg-Sir. Can we talk?”

•”Yes Shannon. And you can call me Ignis, were mutuals.”

•”Ignis. Promise me that when you enter in the third trimester, that you’ll take maternity leave. You’ll need to prepare for your baby.”

•Ignis was taken a back a bit. Yes, her concerns were valid but he didn’t wanna put everything on Shannon.

•”Ignis, I know that you don’t wanna put everything on me but...but you need to Focus on your daughter. You need to prepare.”

•”I-“

•”I’ll handle it. I know what I’m doing.” She smiled.

•Ignis chuckled back. “Really?” Getting up from his chair.

•”Well.” She left while looking back. “I have learned from the best.”

•Ignis laughed. He did taught her well. “Alright. I will. Thank you Shannon.”

•”don’t thank me si- Ignis. I’m just doing my job.”

•honestly Shannon has been a great support system for Ignis. Not just because she knows a thing or two or three about pregnancy, but she really has stepped up.

•Ignis considers her a great friend.

37 weeks: 9 months. He now has to get ready.

•it’s his last day at the restaurant. For awhile anyways.

•it’s actually really emotional. The employees are sad that they won’t see him for awhile but are happy that he’s taking time to be ready on fatherhood (**cough cough Motherhood cough cough**)

•To Ignis, There like a family, a family he gained when he lost so much.

•his eyesight

• and Noct

•After they’ve closed, they celebrate.

•Ignis and Shannon smiling at everyone.

•”I’m proud of you Sir.”

•Ignis smiled back. “Really?”

•”Yeah. Your the bravest person I’ve met.”

•”How, Pray tell?”

•”You may be blind but you certainly don’t act like it. You 𝗡𝗘𝗩𝗘𝗥 let it stop you. I’m- I’m really proud of you.” She choked up. 

•Ignis looked at her with his Emerald eyes and she looked back.

•”And I’m proud of you to, Shannon.”

•(let’s cut to the chase. Oooo. Foreshadowing.)•

•38 weeks: Ignis wonders how much his blindness will affect his daughter.

•he wasn’t lying when he said that his senses have grown. He basically doesn’t need any help.

•not that he wouldn’t have either way, but he doesn’t wanna be a burden on anyone. Including his daughter.

•Sometime during the day, Iggy starts feeling pain down his back.

•it wasn’t too bad, so he went on with his day.

•but the pain got worse.

•so bad that he started doing his deep breath’s.

•(y’all what it is!!)

•(weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee woooooooooooooooo 🚑)

•(that will never get old xD)

•The midwife tells him to get to the hospital, NOW!

•This is it.

•he has to be cut open....

• She was here.

•Ignis holding his daughter for the first time. Well, he broke down.

•he couldn’t see her but he was there to her hold her. He is there for her.

•”Hi Darling. I’m your Father.”

•she suddenly stopped crying and stared at his bad eye.

•After a week, hes able to take her home.

•And oh, If you thought Prompto took too many photos of Ignis’s pregnancy belly....oh boy.

•he immediately starts taking many, MANY MANY, Photos of her.

•she actually looked confused.

• Gladio joking said “so, when are we going to train her?”

•Ignis later made his food cold, on purpose later that night.

•Shannon got to hold her and fell in love with her immediately.

•”feels like holding my son for the first, all over again.” She said teared up.

•Over the years, She has grown to being a shy and a adorable little girl.

•She’s so helpful during work and is popular with the staff. They treat her like they’re siblings.

•She always tries to help Ignis’s blindness. Guiding him around.

•”Watch where your going Daddy.”

•Even tho, he can get around just fine. It warms his heart that she tries to help him.

•Of course, Ignis wishes that Noct could have Met her. Even once.

•but somehow, he believes that Noct is watching her in heaven.

•Noctis is so proud of his friend.

Wow! So long! Well I hoped ya like it. I hope the true ending version is just as good as the alternative version.

I thought it would be cute that he would have a restaurant. ^~^ Gladio got the right idea 💡

Also I did not mean to create a new character, Shannon, but eh why not? I grew attached to her over the story (she sounds like a like Karen but she’s a good Karen. I promise.) and who knows? She might show up in other Headcanons 😉

Also whether you ship her with Ignis, is up to you. Hehehe. I don’t blame you tho.

Anyways, I hoped who requested this, liked it 💙💜

[iamburdened]

Tag meme

How to play:

Jot down who you'd pick for these categories. You don't have to fill them all out. You can use the same character more than once or pick a few for each OR an OC (Hitman!Kylo, Sailor! Flip, etc). Any characters of any fandom you like. I'll go first!

this looks like lots of fun

God, I am about to be such a whore for Adam Driver. Quick explanation of why there is o only Adam here - when I stop reading fics for a fandom and start another, I can’t go back, so Iam always 100% in the fandom of the week. Adam is my drug for now.

1. Love of your life = Kylo Ren/Ben Solo, Clyde Logan (my go to comfort characters at the moment)

2. Fuck buddies = I will say that I way too clingy and kinda possessive to the no attachments rule. (in fictional life, of course. my aro/ace irl ass do not give a single fuck -literally lmao)

3. Why do I like you again / What is it that draws me to you? = Flip (I hate the 70s style that comes with him, ya know, the housewife shit and all)

4. The one you keep coming back to = Kylo (I get over the Star Wars universe and then there am I again)

5. Always sunshine and rainbows when I'm with you = Clyde baby

6. I'll just stare at you / daydream about you = Ben Solo (the person he could've been if people just fucking talked about their problems instead of trying to kill each other in their sleep)

7. Are we fucking or fighting today? = Hitman Kylo (thanks Shannon)

8. Let's run away together = Bond villain!Kylo (trademarked by @babbushka)

9. Just friends = If I don't wanna (fictionally) fuck 'em, I don't read fics for 'em, so I don't know they exist because truth be told, I only watched like 4 Adam Driver films (and 3 of them were Star Wars) [oh god, don't hate me for this]

10. Yes daddy/master/dom = God, all of them, I am such a sub slut (but let's name the biggest daddy energies) Mob!Kylo, regular Kylo, Any fucking au!Kylo, Charlie, master!Kylo ofc

11. You. Me. Baby/Marriage. Now = Kylo (ya know, being the empress and all), modern!Kylo, Clyde (he deserved it), smuggler!Ben Solo - so little content for you out there, baby :( 

12. I would let you do unspeakable things to me = obviously Kylo, any AU, he can just force choke me and I would say "harder, daddy" (OH MY GOD THE DARKER AU, chainsaw massacre kind of killer!Clyde - read @safarigirlsp Wet Work fic - killer!Charlie could get his turn on destroying me)

13. Will you just fuck me already?! = daddy dom!Kylo 🥺

14. Wifey = I could be Kylo's empress or Ben's badass wife, either way I am happy with it. 

me, leaving this post after telling all of all my dirty dreams, probably traumatizing some of you (jk, if you still follow me after all the kinky fics I hit reblog you must be as dirty as me)

Open tag!!!! Wanna give if a go? Be my guest.

[thecockerelinn]

Well, even though quarantine and lockdown may slowly open up for many of us, it’s not over yet, and besides one can never have enough means to escape reality, so here are a few book reccomendations.

All books on this list are LGBTQ or at least have (important) characters who are.

The “Classics”:

Wraeththu  - Storm Constantine (how is it no-one’s talking about this anymore? Please do take into account that those books were written in the early 1990s, they were way ahead of their times, and yet there may be some offensive things - it’s been a while that I’ve read them so I can’t come up with any example, but should you find them somewhat un-feminist, wait until the end xD)

The Left Hand of Darkness - Ursula K. Le Guin (a true classic)

The Last Herald Mage series - Mercedes Lackey (gee yes Vanyel can be a real brat - not quite without reason though, but you’ll come to love him xD And yes we all just pretend that scene in book 3 never happened -_-) (also: influenced the Nightrunner series)

The World of Riverside series - Ellen Kushner (another influence on the Nightrunner series)

The Doctrine of Labyrinths quartet - Sarah Monette (beware, those books are not for everyone, trigger warnings are in order: rape, violence, mental issues, abuse / none of this is ever glorified or belittled, but it’s there, and it is so much a part of the characters’ lifes that it might occasionally seem like it’s not appropriately treated. Speaking of characters: very complex, intriguing characters with very dark sides, but you gotta love ‘em; intricate, complex world building / Nowadays Sarah Monette writes under the pseudonym Katherine Addison) (as far as I know they are unfortunately out of print so you’d have to check second hand book stores)

Historical fiction (with or without the paranormal)

Whyborne and Griffin series - Jordan L. Hawk (lots of paranormal stuff, magic, Lovecraftian creatures, awesome ladies, and so much more - and you will love those boys so much xD)

Magic in Manhattan - Allie Therin (the Roaring 20s, magic, prohibition)

The Collin Pendragon Mysteries - Gregory Harris (imagine Sherlock Holmes and Watson were canon; whodunnit, Victorian England)

Restless Spirits - Jordan L. Hawk  (let’s go ghost hunting: science vs. medium)

A Charm of Magpies - K.J. Charles (magpies - lots of them xP, magic, curses, intrigue, late Victorian England)

At Swim, Two Boys - Jamie O’Neill (set in Dublin around the Easter Uprising 1916; coming-of-age, tragic love story - don’t forget the tissues)

Cambridge Fellows Mysteries - Charlie Cochrane (Edwardian England, mystery, romance; amateur sleuths, found family)

SFF

The Priory of the Orange Tree - Samantha Shannon (epic fantasy, intricate world building, clash of religions, dragons, strong female leads)

The Affair of the Mysterious Letter -  Alexis Hall (fantasy / mystery; Lovecraftian vibes, bizarre and witty retelling of Sherlock Holmes)

The Tarot Sequence - K.D. Edwards (alternative world, Atlantis, magic, god-like beings, found family; trigger warnings: mentions of rape, violence)

The Rifter series - Ginn Hale (fantasy, parallel world; god-like being, magic, religious strife, necromancy (in a way))

Iron Breakers trilogy - Zaya Feli (fantasy; intrigue, cultural differences, battles, fight for a kingdom, romance)

The Icefjord Saga - Zaya Feli (fantasy, Norse inspired world, magic, mythological creatures, battles, curses)

Tales from Verania - TJ Klune (fantasy, comedy, romance; hilariousness galore! - okay sometimes it’s a bit too much, but between all the jokes and sexual innuendoes, the story doesn’t suffer; basically everyone is gay, everyone tries to get into Sam’s trousers ^^;, did I mention the hornless gay unicorn that sweats glitter, and the sexually deviant dragon? xD)

Peter Darling - Austin Chant (fantasy, retelling; very interesting take on Peter Pan, takes place many years after the events in Peter Pan, focused on the relationship between Peter and Hook; the search for a place, for someone to accept you for who you really are)

YA and New Adult

Nevernight Chronicles - Jay Christoff  (sometimes I’m amazed what’s YA nowadays; fantasy; anyway beware of all the blood)

Feverwake duology - Victoria Lee (see above; dystopia; Holy Baby Yoda but these two books are intense! triger warnings: abuse, drug use, violence, mentions of rape, deadly virus outbreak)

Only Mostly Devastated - Sophie Gonzales (contemporary; all the feels: it makes you laugh out loud, it makes you cry; Grease says hello, super sweet quick read)

Timekeeper trilogy - Tara Sim (steampunk - or should it be clockwork punk?; mythology, gods, concept of time, ghosts, cute boys, discourse on colonialism)

The Torch Keeper trilogy - Steven dos Santos (dystopia; betrayal, love between brothers, biological modifications, deadly deadly trials)

Proxy duology - Alex London (dystopia; the rift between rich and poor, unjust society, technology)

The Disasters - M.K. England (sci-fi; band of misfits to the rescue!; Breakfast Club in space - kind of xD)

Magnus Chase & the Gods of Asgard - Rick Riordan (fantasy, mythology; ahhh Uncle Rick - just got to love the man, seriously; Norse mythology, diverse cast, homelesness, found family, disablitiy) (I’m aware it’s officially labelled Middle Grade, but who cares. It is linked to the Percy Jackson series, but you don’t need to know it to read these books)

The TBR pile (meaning books I haven’t read myself yet, but they certainly are on my tbr list, so perhaps they will be on yours now, too):

The Locked Tomb series - Tamsyn Muir  (fantasy)

The Bloodright trilogy - Emily Skrutskie  (sci-fi, YA)

Wild Sky - Zaya Feli (fantasy)

The Extraordinaries - TJ Klune (romance, superpowers - or not..., YA)

Reverie - Ryan La Sala (fantasy)

Soulbound series - Hailey Turner (urban fantasy, romance)

Cemetery Boys - Aiden Thomas (fantasy, paranormal, romance, YA)

Micah Grey series - Laura Lam (fantasy)

Specials:

A Song for Ghosts - Manja Siber (historical, mid 19th century Dresden) - Don your fanciest dress and fetch the binocular, it’s opera time! Originally inspired by The Phantom of the Opera and Yuri on Ice - see if you can spot the hints xD (as a fellow Watcher, Manja kind of makes the list by default* xP Give it a try, you can find it via epubli or on amazon.de)

*No, this isn’t nepotism, I’m just trying to give the support I wish I had. So if you’re an author and a Watcher and you’re not on this list, it’s because I don’t know about it. Tell me, and I gladly put your book on this or any next rec list.

[daisychainsandbowties]

10 17 22 idk if you've done those I'm illiterate

10. Has a piece of writing ever "haunted" you? has your own writing haunted you? what does that mean to you?

EM. YOU. yourself. come over here and ask if i am haunted?? yes, every day, by the image of shannon slipping mary's motorcycle helmet off her head. this:

"then she steps forward and removes Mary's helmet with careful hands and Beatrice has never felt more a voyeur in her life than when she watches Sister Shannon dab the blood from Mary's split lip with the pad of her thumb. Watches Mary bat her hand away, her eyes rolling, "I'm fucking fine" and "Language" a practiced one two punch" ~ tmtl ch. 1

and this:

"Lilith shudders at her touch, makes a mournful sound, then comes awake in an instant.... Beatrice withdraws, sits for a moment on the edge of Lilith's bed before rising. Lilith's melodramatic groan of relief makes her tempted to drop back down, to curl up alongside her and try to pick the pieces out of her, to reassemble them and form an image that's whole, but she resists. All the better to let sleeping Liliths lie."

~ tmtl ch. 3

i terms of other things i think the book of the outsider trilogy by Mark Lawrence is quite haunting, as a story. i find a lot of the poetry i read very haunting. but mostly it is lines like those above - moments of absolute intimacy shadowed by restraint. that line from harrow the ninth that goes "you were so afraid she might touch you. you were so afraid anyone might touch you. you had always been afraid of anyone touching you, and had not known your longing flinch was so obvious to those who tried."

my own writing... sometimes. when i write about sickness, certainly. that feels haunting. but mostly my own writing is when i let the ghosts fly out of the window.

17. talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. tell me about the lore, the history, the things that won't make it in the text.

as you well know i have about eight WIPs. but my actual novel really actually resonates with that very popular line from, again, tasmuir "love is too long and life is too short" but ah... kind of flipped. what happens when the life goes on and the love is there but not the beloved? the story started there, moved onto a dragon with a clockwork heart and a boy and the colour purple, of a very empty landscape and the very loud dead. naturally i have spider-people and none of my characters have bodies without a bit or the horrific or the angelic crammed into them (often both). the lore is a lot, but the story is about gods and spitting in the face of fate. it has Monster Hunter vibes and also a bit of Cormac McCarthy's the road (vast emptiness. two bodies inside it). it has all the things i like - horror and blood and intimacy. but yeah, the lore doc is a chonky boi.

22. how organised are you with your writing? describe to me your organisation method, if it exists.

my entire process involves the notes app on my phone and like three documents all called the same thing except lore 1, lore 2, lore 3 where i dump vomited-up fragments of sentences and half-baked ideas and then occasionally a 8000 word dump of pristine lore. i plot only inside my own brain. my masters thesis supervisor had to cut me open to get a plot outline from inside me, and it was all lies anyway. i am more of a character writer than a plot-specialist, but i feel like once i have My Guys and A Problem the story pretty much writes itself (and i'm so wrong about that). mostly i outline in my brain and then by writing random lines from the start, the midish, and the kind-of-end, and then i do linguistic gymnastics to reach those sentences. (and boy am i clumsy)

i type everything. writing with pen + paper is still not my favourite thing to do - still slow and a bit painful - so i prefer to type. i have calluses, in fact, from typing, which is really quite embarrassing.