#Women and men in the media

[hotdogmchiggin]

Company Mandated Fancy Fits on the Tulpar 😏

Also had to include the REAL star of the show (and a bonus)

Based off of this and this. Thank you very much joetastic for being inspirational 👍

The REAL reason this is late

[strawberry38]

I'll just place this here

[idiosyncraticrednebula]

Hot take: I actually think men and women are meant to work together and complement each other and not like,,, dislike each other and be divisive.

[ayaahh00]

Social media has really shown me that men are the ones abusing the platform with mass reporting. They mass report more than anyone, always to silence women. Since I joined social media in 2012, I never had my accounts or comments reported or removed until I got into radical feminism online, especially on Twitter.

That's when I witnessed how men, with their egotistical, narcissistic nature and fragile egos, desire to live in a dictatorship. They believe they are entitled to mass report and silence women, getting our accounts suspended and our posts removed, even when we're simply stating facts supported by data. Men coordinate and work together to mass report women’s specifically feminists posts. Men are genuinely by far the most childish hypersensitive creatures, with egos more sensitive than a clitoris, which has 8,000 nerve endings.

[brinconvenient]

I’m sorry... WHAT?!

Seriously: When do you ever just sit and think about the fact that Ian Katz of the Guardian (recently boycotted for its transphobia) and the BBC (routinely protested for its transphobia) was married to Justine Roberts of Mumsnet (a primary radicalizing hub for UK transphobia) for twenty-five years? Most people don’t! I didn’t, until I heard it from the poet Roz Kaveney during an interview. It got trimmed from that piece, and I have been trying to wedge it into different pieces ever since, to no avail. Sometimes, when I talk to other trans people, I will mention that a top Guardian and/or BBC editor was married to the founder of Mumsnet; almost always, when I mention this, I will find out that they didn’t know.

Here’s something else that happens when I tell a trans person that Ian Katz (Channel 4, BBC Newsnight, the Guardian) was married to Justine Roberts (Mumsnet) for 25 years. They will, without fail, make the following noise: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Then they’ll inhale a little, and then they’ll do a controlled little exhale. Then they’ll say yeah, that explains it. Or, yeah. That makes total sense.

[itwaslegendary]

Taylor Swift's interview on CBS Sunday Morning; 25/08/2019

[ruhlare]

i don't like it when someone is easy to reach. when someone is open to everyone, when literally anyone can get their attention. it is a question of values ​​and principles not to be open to everyone and not to have the need for everyone's attention. people who are easily available won't value soulful connections.

[ddenji]

i technically already posted this panel but the gender dynamics in csm are so beyond anything else in shonen rn. yoru occupying a more traditionally masculine, agressive, perpetrative space here and denji always, always, always occupying the space of the female, the subdued, the taken advantage of. his wording here is so defensive, trying to deflect the act, because he is always being acted against. yoru, the living embodiment of war (a traditionally male system and responsibility!) being trapped in the body of a teenage girl. fujimoto does a good job of subverting traditional gender dynamics in some very subtle ways earlier in the manga, but this one seems far more blatant and disturbing in the context of denjis entire experience.

[dykedvonte]

You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.

-Shrimp Anon

The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.

Get ready cause this is a yap session:

Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.

I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.

The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.

This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.

Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...

These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.

I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.

Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.

It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.

I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.

It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.

There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.

End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.

[sukibenders]

The Arcane fandom, especially on TikTok is never beating the allegations because why, now, some fans act like it's too inconceivable to imagine that Ambessa was, not only, pregnant twice but gave birth twice as well? And their reasoning for this is "She looks like the type to get a man pregnant instead" or "She's too tough for that, I just can't see someone like her going through that." There are layers to these statements because, for one, just because someone, especially a woman, is a dominant force doesn't mean that they can't get/don't want to become pregnant (do you believe overtly dominant men can't be fathers?) It's also very weird because the undertones of misogyny and misogynoir and the overt masculinization of black women are there because, not only are they viewing pregnancy and giving birth, in general, to be viewed as something "weak" (even though it's grueling hours of labor that results in tearing the body apart, sometimes even death) but also attempts to strip Ambessa of her nuance. Yes, she is strong and very dominant, but she also deeply loved her children, who she birthed, and when one was taken away from her it changed her deeply. It's very gross to view a character like her in this way because it also reflects how you view dominant women in real life, pregnancy, and childbirth as a whole. Like how are you going to praise Arcane for having such a wide and diverse ensemble of female characters, but then have misogynistic takes like this? Make it make sense.

[scary-yuri]

GLaDOS' entire existence is based on a woman whose autonomy was stolen from her, i want portal fans to remember that when they talk about how they hate her but then act like Wheatley did nothing wrong

[formerprincewille]

Something that really sets Wille and Simon apart from other queer ships is that when we say their love language is physical touch, IT REALLY IS PHYSICAL TOUCH. And I’m not speaking of just sex. Over the course of the show, the amount of touching between them is astronomical. And that’s really something rarely seen in queer media. There may be moments here or there, but often times there’s a lack of physical contact unless it’s for “the plot”. Wille and Simon feel like a real couple in the way they’re always physically reaching out for each other.

[orenji-iro-no-sora]

We all know that haikyuu is packed with life lessons, especially about growth and competition but one of the things that brought me so much comfort in life is the story of Miya twins. Both Osamu and Atsumu were hard workers but what differentiated them when it comes to volleyball prowess was their priorities. Osamu being a naturally gifted athlete was a major push in Atsumu's life; they made each other better (and worse in some ways). But it was Atsumu's choice to become a professional player and a great setter that pulled him ahead. Atsumu was dedicated to it and if Osamu wanted he could've reached the same skill level (or maybe even more).

Basically as long as you love and want something enough, despite there being "better" people out there, you'll reach greatness in your own right. And I think it's beautiful that consistent effort, even if it takes longer than "natural talent" (which is a topic for another day), will get you where you want to be.

Also, you can be good at something and even have potential to be greater and yet not choose it. You don't HAVE TO pursue anything just because it's expected or even possibly the most natural course for you to take. What matters is what you love.

[ayaahh00]

Social media apps are supportive of men and curated for them. Women's comments and posts constantly get removed when they fight back against men's misogyny or call men out. On TikTok, when I reply back to a man saying both men and women are bad, pointing out that women can never be 5% as bad as men given that over 95% of crimes are committed by men, my comment was removed despite gaining many likes. It was removed due to mass reports from men and incels. Meanwhile, misogynistic replies from men remain. When I report these, nothing happens, but their mass reports against women are effective. It's exhausting, and it feels like there's no safe space for women on social media as long as men are there. Men will never allow us to have a single safe space, taking over and mass reporting to silence us. It's suffocating how men get to post whatever they want online and can mass report anything by women. Every social media platform is tailored for and controlled by men. Women work in these companies too, but the majority are men. It's incredibly tiring.

[buttercup-barf]

Couldn't make a post... Hit another "drawering hard" period. That's okay, though.

Might as well continue with these two, while I relearn. Things. It's not much, but I think at least one doodle once a week might do well for me.

I just think Beppa is neat. I wish there was a reskin mod with her! Her and Peppino are both autistic, but just in different ways. Love that for 'em.

Fun fact, all of these pictures are barely edited, because I took them in-app, and just cropped+greyscaled them. Usually I try to edit stuff in my gallery to up the contrast and whatnot, but this works too, I hope.

[avicecaro]

legitimately i think men underestimate how boring misogyny is in media. like yes it can be gross or uncomfortable or upsetting or whatever else but for the most part it’s just boring. like we know this stuff. it’s not sooo controversial and revolutionary and new to the scene and edgy. it’s violent sex and women not being treated as people. like we know. we’re already living in it babes. the fastest way to make a piece of media boring is to make it misogynistic. and this especially applies to fantasy for me, because you’re over here getting immersed in a different world with different types of people and places and societies and then it’s just oh, the author didn’t actually make anything new. they took what they know about the real world some hundred years ago and added magic powers. or this was all just a really long intro to a dnd themed porno. the male characters sacrifice complexity because their motivations are just.. misogyny. which is at its core very simple and unimaginative. rape or violence or degradation or abuse aren’t really all that shocking or complex to see on screen. they’re in loads of movies with varying levels of quality in handling and i’m not particularly upset by them. they’re in some of my favorite movies. this isn’t an issue of sensibilities or fear. it’s just so boring.