#Why do you keep talking to me and sending me things? So much?
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i never wanted water once part 3
tommy is also breakup baking, prompted by my dear @sanguinarysanguinity
tw: mention of parent death, mention of child abuse
part 1
part 2
~
Gutierrez eyes him on his way out of the locker room. "Feel like no one ever sees you anymore. You coming back to the pickup game or what?"
"Oh." Tommy gives his damp hair one last rub from the towel. "I wasn't planning on it, to be honest. Too awkward."
Gutierrez frowns. "Why?"
"You know," Tommy says, wishing he didn't have to, "Eddie Diaz. I broke up with his best friend."
"Diaz hasn't shown in weeks. Probably got injured. You know how that crew is."
And that. Well. He and Eddie were friends. They became tight very quickly in a way Tommy hasn't experienced with many people. He shouldn't have thrown a connection like that away without at least trying to salvage it.
He sends a text, a polite, generic one asking about his welfare. Worst thing that can happen is Eddie tells him to fuck off and he's back where he started. He fully expects to be left on read.
He does not expect Eddie to tell him he's moving back to Texas because he's given up on his son deciding to come home. Eddie invites him to a pre-going away dinner at a bar and grill before he goes down South for a few days to scout out homes. And, no, absolutely not. But Tommy proposes getting a drink, just the two of them. Eddie very validly explains that he can't spare the time, since he's already started packing up his life and he's working overtime to save up for a down payment. Tommy gets it. He does.
The day after the dinner, Eddie calls him. "Hey, man. I know we're like two ships passing in the night, but I didn't want to leave without a proper goodbye. I still got some more shifts before I move for good, but the time will go by quick. We'll just stay on the line, okay? Keep me company while I go through my kitchen cabinets."
"It's good to hear from you," Tommy says honestly.
"So yeah." Eddie hums. "Why'd you do it?"
"Text you?" Tommy says. "I heard that-"
"Kinard," Eddie says, unamused.
"Yeah. Sorry."
"You just didn't seem the type to flee."
None of you know me as well as you thought you did, Tommy doesn't say. That's not fair to any of them. "I wasn't, in the past. Well, I tried not being that. A couple times. It didn't work out."
"Oh," Eddie says. "There it is."
"There what is?"
"You've got shit."
"Haven't we all?"
"Hey, I am not denying that." Eddie chuckles. "Do you plan on dealing with it, or letting it blow up every good thing you find until you die?"
"Jesus, Eddie."
"What's the point in mincing words? You did something dumb and destructive. What kinda friend would I be if I let that go without saying anything?"
"So what's the weather even like in El Paso? Does it ever get below 100?"
After a groan, Eddie lets Tommy talk about his shit, about Texas, parenthood, and chess clubs, for the rest of the call. Tommy can't say that he'll miss him. He missed him already and now he gets to continue doing so. All of this sucks.
Tommy tries his hand at gnocchi made with ricotta, lemon, and pepper that subsequently almost causes a fistfight during B shift.
Demetra favors him with a warm smile, taking in the large box in his hands. "Tom, right? Welcome! What's all this?"
"Tommy," he says easily, impressed she remembered his name at all. He hasn't been to this slightly dusty community center in five or six years. "Uh, this is garlic knots and mini calzones."
"Well, hey. You're even more welcome than before. Come take a seat."
December is a stupid time to rejoin group, many of the participants close to the edge from a cocktail of seasonal depression, missing dead loved ones, and generalized loneliness. Tommy knew it would be like this going in. He counted on it. Everyone will have so much to say that there likely won't be any time for him to open his mouth. He's not ready to spill. It will help to just soak in the atmosphere of unashamed honesty for a while.
At his third meeting, Cal, a slender guy in his mid twenties with a curly mohawk, keeps bringing up his mother. "She never wanted me to enlist," he says, "and now that I'm back home and struggling, she can't stop being all 'I told you so' morning, noon, and night. She never says it, but she is thinking it."
"Is she?" Tommy finds himself asking. "Or are you putting something on her that isn't there?"
"Maybe so." Cal pops one of Tommy's fried ravioli in his mouth and chews thoughtfully. "I don't know, I should probably give her a chance, think first about what she's actually saying before I react. But it's hard in the moment, you know?"
"Tommy?" Demetra says a minute later, making him feel like a kid being called on by the teacher. "How's your relationship with your mom?"
"Nonexistent. She died when I was fifteen." He crosses his ankles. "Fell asleep in the car on our way back from an away game and we couldn't wake her up. Heart attack."
Demetra frowns sympathetically. "That must've been hard for a kid to witness."
"I've seen so much worse since then. People shot in the head by machine guns, people covered in burns over most of their bodies..."
Demetra shakes her head slightly. "They weren't your mom."
He ducks his head, pressing his lips together. "True. It's just- That's not- It's not trauma. I don't fear falling asleep and not waking up."
"What do you fear?" Cal asks.
Being left, being hurt, being validated in his belief that no one will ever see him for all he is and choose to stick around. "Standard stuff, really. Clowns, taxes, drivers on the freeway."
He gets a pity laugh, a groan or two, and one outright glare. "Okay, okay." He exhales loudly. "Ending up alone by someone else's choice rather than mine."
"So you're cool with being on your own, as long as you're the one keeping everyone away," Cal says.
God, that sounds idiotic. "Yes?"
"You prefer it like this?" asks a woman about his own age wearing a green bomber jacket.
He shrugs. "It's not ideal, but as far as worst case scenarios go, it's okay. It's fine."
"It's spineless," says a gray-haired man with a Desert Storm hat.
Tommy doesn't flinch. "Yeah, that's kind of an inherent character trait. I keep thinking I got it licked, then it shows up wearing another face. Scared of my dad, so I joined the army and became someone he couldn't hurt anymore. Scared of people knowing I was gay, so I waited to come out until I was surrounded by brand new people. Scared of my boyfriend leaving, so." He pushes at the skin above his knees, kneading it. "So I left him first."
"You fall back," says Bomber Jacket. Her name is Annie or Angie. She has conflicted feelings about dating a man with kids. "It's easy to stop being scared when the thing that scared you is far away."
He hears Eddie. You just didn't seem the type to flee.
Demetra holds up a hand. Tommy's face must be doing something concerning. "No one here faults you for what you did to survive. Is it still serving you, is the question, or is that just what you're used to?"
He doesn't bake when he gets home. He drinks half the beers in his fridge and does a shockingly efficient job of cleaning his house, while drafting and deleting twenty-seven different texts. He then wakes up the next day, and goes to the pickup game.
Gutierrez scores four rebounds on him and doesn't shut up about it for the rest of their next shift. Tommy grumbles, and talks shit, and promises he won't have much to brag about next time.
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The One You Need | seven
🎶 Rest your head here, pull me closer I'll hold you tight while you let go, girl And I could love you, if you just let me Be the one you need🎶
pairing: neighbor!joel miller x f!reader rating: explicit, 18+ minors dni summary: when you move into town hellbent on keeping everyone at an arm’s length, your neighbor Joel finds his way into your life. warnings/tags: au, neighbor joel, age gap [reader is late 20s/early 30s, Joel is late 40s], hyper-independent reader, absent fathers, minor discussion of baby poop, fluff, cuddling, SMUT, repeated verbal consent, oral (m and f receiving), unprotected p in v sex, hair pulling, hickeys, mild choking, pussy pronouns, terms of endearment [sweetheart, good girl, sweet girl], female reader, reader has hair long enough to pull, no physical description, protective!joel, soft!joel, dare i say ei!joel, no use of y/n. word count: 9.1k series masterlist | part six a/n: here’s the last chapter of this fic! it’s been a long time coming and i’ve appreciated each and every one of you for reading, commenting, and reblogging. it was great fun and i hope there’re more stories to tell in the future
It was worse than you imagined. You sister really was on her own despite having a very legally married husband. It only took a day to realize she hadn’t been exaggerating the situation at all. He left for work at five in the morning after not even attempting to help with the baby through the night. Your little nephew was going through a bout of sleep regression, and you witnessed how your sister was the one who went to soothe him when he seemed to wake and cry every hour. And when her husband came home twelve hours later in the evening, he made a beeline for the couch, sat down on it and suddenly had a list of demands.
Bring me a beer. When’s dinner? Did you vacuum today? Why is the washing machine ringing? You should switch those clothes out. And after dinner, he didn’t even bother taking his plate to the sink much less being a fully-functioning adult and cleaning it – or at the very least, rinsing it off.
Your sister’s day to day seemed to be a never ending circle of soothing the baby, changing the baby, feeding the baby, cleaning, cooking, cleaning again, and laundry. How she had managed for so long before hitting her breaking point and calling was beyond you. Now carrying some of the burden, you felt resentment growing for her husband – and for all men. Was this not how your own father had acted when your mom was raising you and your sister? Was he not just as absent-minded? And if these were the two marriages you had for reference, men seemed to take the cake for least helpful and useless humans on the face of the earth. All forty-nine percent of them.
It was a big reason (but not the only reason) as to why you were dodging Joel’s calls. Your first few days with your sister had grown so much anger toward men that the last thing you wanted to do was talk to one – even if he was putting on what you now believed to be an act about being attentive and caring. For the first week, he tried calling two or three times a day, and you let each of them go to voicemail. Your sister had asked who was calling, but you shrugged and insisted it was spam. Now that you’d been with her for two weeks, Joel called less and less. Still, he called once a day at varying times, hoping to catch you in a free moment. What he didn’t realize was you had no free moments as you took some of the weight off your sister’s shoulders.
You closed your laptop as your sister rounded the couch with two cups of coffee. On the carpet in front of you, your nephew was playing with a toy that seemed to only be able to play one song over and over again. With rather poor timing, your phone rang right as you were being handed coffee, and so it was impossible for you to hide the screen which very clearly read “Joel” and not “Spam Risk”. As you went to click the side button and send the call to voicemail, you caught a mischievous glance from your sister.
“Who’s Joel?”
“My neighbor,”
Your sister hid her smile by taking a sip from her coffee. She nodded slowly and let out an acknowledging hum. “He’s spam?”
You shot her a glare, “yes.”
She nodded again, then fixated her attention on her child. “How many times have you slept with spam?”
You took another sip of your coffee before reaching forward to set the mug on the table in front of you. “Not enough to warrant him being so persistent,”
“Must’ve left quite an impression. Why aren’t you answering?”
You pondered how far into this conversation you wanted to go. If you wanted to go into it at all. That childhood in the family home had really done a number on you. Shit, you were sure it had done a number on her, too. That the years of walking on eggshells and trying to figure out what type of mood mom and dad were in had done seemingly irreparable damage. That you couldn’t get yourself to let someone in. That in the times that you’d tried, it wasn’t enough. It ended in heartbreak – both blindsided and not.
And deciding none of that mattered because your sister was in her own sewer of shit, you decided to go with a simple answer. “I think he’s looking for something I can’t give him,”
If she’d been your best friend who you told everything to, she would’ve called bullshit. But it was just your sister, so she nodded in false understanding. You wondered if anyone would ever really know you.
With your morning coffee behind you, you started off on a laundry list of chores – which surprisingly enough, didn’t include actual laundry today. Surely today would blend into all the other days spent here. And would culminate in you growing so frustrated with your brother-in-law that you’d eventually just remove yourself from the room and disappear into the guest bedroom that at this point should’ve just had your name on it.
It was like clockwork. Completely infuriating that you could predict it so easily. He came home, ignored his child, and plopped his ass in his recliner, demanding a beer and asking why the living room hadn’t been vacuumed. You wanted to smash the glass bottle over his head and scream that there weren’t enough hours in the day to do everything. Not when there was an infant that needed attention and caring for.
And because you knew you were bound to say something you’d regret, you excused yourself from the living room early and retreated to bed with your laptop and some shitty television show you could go numb to. Even though the intent was to turn off your brain, you couldn’t stop thinking about how long you were going to stay here. A couple more days? Weeks? A month or two? Would you ever go back to Texas?
✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿
The next morning, you woke up in a sheen of sweat. Hair stuck to your cheek and forehead. And you sat up with the sheets pooled around your waist. Fuck. Two weeks and the sex dream about Joel you expected to happen in the first couple days had finally made an appearance. It would’ve been nice to get laid. Of course. But not at the expense of stringing him along. He deserved someone who could open all the way up to him. And lean on him. And depend on him. And all you could do was depend on yourself. No one else could pick up any slack for you. You could do it the best.
The baby shrieked from the other room and you knew it was late enough in the morning that he was up for good and your brother-in-law had already left for work. It was safe for you to re-emerge into the wild. Blindly reaching for the nightstand, you fumbled around for your phone, realizing it wasn’t plugged into the charger. Thinking back through the blending of days, you couldn’t even remember the last time you’d had it.
Padding out and seeing your nephew playing with a rattle, you waved excitedly to him. All but running over, you bent over and gave him a big, loud kiss to the head. Then you turned to finally address your sister who was already brewing a pot of coffee.
“I gotta go to the store today,”
Your sister nodded and picked up a notepad where you could see the grocery list of things she’d already added to it. She was past the point of offering to go with you as the last time that happened, it was an utter nightmare. Toting a fussy infant around while trying to move efficiently through the market was counterintuitive. You just wanted to get in and get out, and you could do that best if you went by yourself.
“Do you know where my phone is?” You looked back over your shoulder at the coffee table with no luck.
“I put it by your keys near the front door. It fell between the couch cushions last night,”
You nodded once – the sneaky couch cushion. Always the likely culprit. “I’m gonna go shower, get a cup of coffee and watch an episode of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse with my little man,” you pointed at your nephew. At your attention he burst out into a toothless grin and a giggle. “And then I’ll head out for groceries,”
You were quickly learning that nothing ever went to plan with a baby. Everything was constantly derailed. The plan of shower, coffee, and TV was a nice one. But what you couldn’t account for was that halfway through the episode of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, your nephew was going to have a massive blowout that sent poop up to his shoulder blades. Gagging and choking to keep yourself from upchucking, you ran him to the bathroom while your sister drew the bath. Getting him undressed was a task as removing his onesie meant you got some of the poop in his hair. And bathing him while also dodging the poopy water he slapped in your direction could’ve qualified you for an olympic medal. You ran for the front door as quickly as you could once he was clean again and your sister had him back in a fresh onesie.
You never thought you’d be so happy to go to the grocery store. Even if it ended up that it seemed like everyone and their mother was doing their shopping all at the same time. Didn’t anyone work anymore?
✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿
Stubborn as all hell and not wanting to make more than one trip out to the car for groceries, you loaded the canvas bags on your shoulders and forearms until they were tugging at your skin and threatening to drop everything you’d just bought on the garage floor.
Struggling to lift your hand to turn the doorknob you got the slightest of grips on it and used your weight to push the door open, while using your foot as a wedge to keep it ajar for you to slither through and into the house. It was commonplace now to enter the house as quietly as possible. The baby was a notoriously light sleeper and you’d already been guilty of accidentally waking him more than once. So sneaking in, you knew you’d made the correct decision when you heard the classical lullabies coming from the nursery. He was out. And elsewhere in the house, you could hear the kitchen sink going. Good. Your sister was catching up on the pile of dirty dishes her husband had left behind.
You huffed and puffed, willing yourself to make it to the kitchen before you dropped the bags to the floor. It seemed as though you were going to make it. A quiet, self-congratulatory cheer was halfway out of your mouth when your breath caught in your throat at the threshold of the kitchen.
Hunched over the kitchen sink, rinsing off a handful of soapy silverware, was a large, strong back with broad shoulders. Far larger than your sister’s. Joel.
Frozen, taking a moment to comprehend that he was actually, truly there, you didn’t say a thing or make another sound. But it was like he could sense someone behind him. After setting the clean silverware down in the drying rack, he looked over his shoulder and spotted you.
“Hey,” he pressed a smile at you. That charming smile you’d gotten really used to seeing back home.
“What are you doing?”
“Well,” he chuckled and looked down at the sink, “I’m gonna finish washing these dishes.” He glanced back up at you, “then I’m throwing a load of towels into the laundry.”
You furrowed your eyebrows. Eyes flicked over him. He was just as you remembered. As if two weeks had been two years and you’d just come back from war. “Where’s my sister?”
“Sleepin’. She was tryin’ to get the little guy down for a nap but he was fussin’. I told her to get some rest,”
Tears started stinging the corners of your eyes, “you put the baby down for a nap?”
He nodded, almost looking confused at your confusion. Why wouldn’t he help with the baby? Little did he know you’d just spent the last couple weeks watching the baby’s father do absolutely nothing. So without saying anything else, you ran to him. Threw your arms over his shoulders and clutched onto him. There was a keen awareness that as you held onto him for dear life, he wrapped his arms around your hips and held you to him. Secure. Steady.
You sniffled and turned your face into the crook of his neck, “I miss you.”
Though he knew you couldn’t see his face, he still tried to hide a grin. Instead, he turned and pressed a kiss to the side of your head, “I miss you, too.” He let you go as you slowly backed away from him and wiped your fingers beneath your eyes to make sure he didn’t see any tears fall. But he stared into your eyes and smiled a little wider, helping you catch the one tear that had made it down your cheek. He swiped it away with his thumb, “you were screening my calls.”
“I know. I’m sorry, I–”
He pursed his lips and shook his head, “don’t apologize. I know.” Joel pressed another smile and cupped his hand over the back of your head to guide you closer so he could kiss your forehead. “I know I was asking a lot of you too soon. I know that,” he lowered his hands to yours and intertwined your fingers together. “I was scared you were going to run too far away from me. That I wouldn’t be able to wrangle you back. And I… pushed too hard. I know I did because I saw the same thing in your sister today. So afraid to ask for help. Like someone’s gonna think you’re a burden if you can’t do it all,”
You sniffled again and Joel raised his hand again to swipe another tear away before it could fall fully down your cheek.
“You’re not a burden because despite your best efforts, I’m falling for you. Take the trash out to the bins for you. Snake the drain when your hair clogs it. Plant flowers in the winter and pick a bouquet for you in the spring. I want to do all those things, so all you gotta do is ask me. Ask me and I’ll do anything for you,”
Nodding, you leaned forward and pressed your forehead to Joel’s chest. He scritched his fingers through your hair. All you could do was sniffle again. Because how in the hell did you stumble upon a guy like him when… “My sister’s husband is just like our dad. And I feel bad for her,”
Joel took a deep breath. He didn’t want to be too hasty with a response to this one. Finally he settled on one. “Is that why you dodged me? Thought maybe I’d turn out to be like your dad and your sister’s husband?” He lowered his head closer to yours when you didn’t stir. You were just trying to protect yourself. He knew that, too. “You’re a good girl. You know that?”
You raised your head and looked up at him. Something you expected to hear more likely within the bedroom, had never sounded so innocent. Joel grinned a little wider and brushed his fingers through your hair to push it away from your face.
“A good girl. An understanding sister. And a helluva woman,”
On any other day, you would’ve blushed and hid your face from him at a comment like that. But today, you let his words rain over you. You wanted him to continue. To keep proving that he was leaps and bounds different from other men. But your nephew had other plans.
And at the sound of his crying, your sister padded out of her room and spotted you and Joel in the kitchen. She blinked sleepily, beaming at the sight of you two before she carried on to tend to the baby.
You stayed turned in her direction for a moment after she’d already left your scope of vision. But at the feeling of Joel’s hands squeezing your hips, you turned your attention back to him. “You stayin’ here, or…?”
He shook his head, “I’ve got a hotel ‘bout 10 minutes away.”
“Well, hurry up, then. I’ll throw the towels in the wash,”
✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿
There you were. Once again. Lounging in Joel Miller’s (hotel) bed. His khaki duffle bag was on the desk pushed up against the corner of the room. A small backpack of some items of yours sat beside it. And his phone was on the nightstand beside you. That struck you as the greenest of all green flags because the phone was in striking distance should you get curious, but Joel was not. He was in the bathroom, where now, the shower turned off. You had come in together, but despite your lips on his neck with teeth grazing over it, he insisted on showering first. To get the airport off of him.
The bathroom door creaked open and you looked in that direction, awaiting him to return to your line of vision. He did just a second later. Rounded the corner out of the bathroom and stood there at the foot of the bed – a white towel slung around his hips, haphazardly secured at the front. He held a smaller white towel and scrubbed it over his head to rid his hair of dripping water.
“Now that’s a sight I missed,” he trailed his eyes over your body, splayed out on the bed. He tossed the smaller of the towels onto the desk and crawled onto the bed.
He was so close now. His position above you forced you to recline, laying down fully. Caged there between his hands on either side of your body, you lifted your head off the pillow and kissed him. Pleased that when you lowered your head back to the bed, he followed with you as to not break your kiss. His tongue pressed to your mouth in search of entry, and once you let it in, it was greeted by your own tongue.
Joel hummed into your mouth and let his hips fall down to yours so he could move his hands to your face. Cupping either side of your head, he brushed his thumbs back and forth over your cheeks. After a couple weeks of living life more closely resembling a nun, mixed with this morning’s sex dream, you felt redeemed by a makeout session. Longing and yearning paired with frenzied lips. Teeth gently tugging at soft, plush skin. Tongue vying for attention and power. Wandering hands in search of the next bit of purchase. You bucked your hips upward, dragging your mound over the bulge between his legs. That white towel was doing as many wonders as his gray sweatpants did. It felt like you were in college again, on some sad twin mattress, dry-humping a co-ed that wasn’t going to give you any amount of pleasure. This time, you knew the man you were dry-humping would.
Joel’s lips tightened into a smile against yours and he pulled his hips back to tease you… to keep you from getting the friction you wanted. He snaked his hand between you and the pillow and grabbed a fistful of hair at the back of your head. With a slight yank, your head tilted backward, leaving your neck exposed, and you at his mercy.
“Joel,” you moaned, feeling the throbbing in your core intensify.
“Only good girls get to do that,” he smirked and pulled your hair a little harder. With your neck stretched out fully, he leaned forward and bit it, close to the collarbone.
Instead of letting go, he sucked on it, and you absolutely knew what he was doing… Marking you. You’d wear the bruise for a few days, hiding it like a teenager who feared getting caught with it, but who would secretly ogle it in the mirror to remember the day it was given to you.
“I’m a good girl,” you pleaded, trying to lift your hips again.
But now he moved his other hand down and gripped into your hips. Forced it back down to the bed. Too easily, you thought. “Are you? Last time I checked, good girls didn’t disappear for two weeks without a goodbye fuck,”
You pursed your lips together in a pout. That was fair. Had you not sprung your exit on him at the very last possible moment, knowing it wouldn’t amount to any sort of closure. For either of you. “I want to be one for you,”
Joel did his best to hide his smile. But you saw it crack through this domineering facade. “Yeah?”
You nodded with widened eyes and batting eyelashes. Tracing down his chest and stomach, your hands found their purchase on the top of the towel at his hips. You looked down at it for the quickest of moments. Just enough time to spot the outline of his cock beneath the fabric. Then you flicked your gaze back up to his eyes.
“Show me what kind of good girl you are,”
With a clear indication to proceed, you looked back down at his waist and curled your fingers beneath the fabric. Though it hadn’t budged from where he’d originally secured it, it became undone with very little force from you. The towel fell open and partially exposed him to you. Realizing your jaw had fallen slack, you closed it and swallowed while simultaneously pulling the towel to the side until he was completely free from it.
There was something oddly intimate about his complete nudity juxtaposed by your lack thereof. His member bobbed up and down on its own volition as he grew harder and you reached forward to wrap your fingers around him. Though with the way you were positioned together, you had to rotate your hand palm up, and twist it in a less than desirable way to be able to stroke him at all.
His eyes drifted down to his waist and caught sight of your hand. Just having you touch him again was pleasurable enough. If he was being honest, his own hand hadn’t been cutting it in the past couple weeks. But he saw you struggle to keep pace at the awkward angle and he grabbed hold of your wrist and pulled it off of him. What he didn’t expect was that you’d cry out, and with a sense of near-panic, try to reach for his length again.
Realizing he’d asked you to show him, and then very quickly was keeping you from doing so like some sort of punishment, his heart twisted into a knot. “Sorry– sorry. Just let me…” He sat back on his heels and shifted his weight from one knee to the other, to reposition himself, straddling your body.
He lifted your hand, palm facing up, and spit into it before he released your wrist, which you promptly brought back to his shaft. Now with a better angle, you were able to stroke him with far more ease. Your eyes stayed glued to it, focused on how your hand slid from the base all the way up to the head, where your fingers curled over it before sliding back down to the base.
“Lemme see your eyes,”
On command, you looked up at Joel. His jaw had fallen slack and he stared at you with something devilish in his eyes. You licked your lips and inhaled sharply, wishing you were a little less clothed at the moment. Or at the very least, not wearing an old college t-shirt. A little visual stimulation right now could’ve done him some good.
“You wanna suck my dick, sweetheart?”
It was a far more gentle proposal than you’d been expecting, but nonetheless, you nodded eagerly. You lifted your head to try to get at him as quickly as possible, but he shook his head and clicked his teeth until you succumbed and laid back down. This time when he peeled your hand off of him, he did so with a nod to assure you, you’d have it back in a moment.
“Take your shirt off for me?”
Thank God. You reached for the hem with haste and tore the thing off, flinging it over the side of the bed. Left in your bra – not the sexiest of them but still with a little padding for a slight push-up – you went to resume your place, but Joel caught you and helped you up a little further so you weren’t in a fully supine position. Now with your head propped up at a slight angle on the pillows, he brought his knees further up until he was straddled just below your shoulders. You flicked your eyes at him nervously. This was new.
“This alright?” He asked with his length in his hand, slowly stroking himself. There was a moment’s pause on your end, eyes flicking back and forth between him and his cock, before you nodded. He smiled to himself as you fixated on the way he played with his member. “Let me hear you say it,”
You looked back up at him. How could you have forgotten you were in the presence of the king of verbal consent? “This is good,”
“Good girl,” he smiled. With slow deliberation, he eased his hips forward and guided himself into your awaiting mouth. His free hand moved to the headboard, palm pressed flat against it to steady himself. He knew he’d grow weak feeling your mouth working him over.
And he was right. The moment your lips closed around the head of his cock, he let out a labored groan. His eyes fluttered shut and he let his chest deflate for what seemed like the first time in a long time. Now with both of his hands against the headboard, you held onto the base of his cock gently while you sucked and licked at the head; pulling more and more precum from him with each lick to the underside.
“Fuck, that’s good,” he looked down at caught you staring at him.
You blushed and inhaled through your nose. Allowing your eyes to drift shut, you worked your mouth down halfway down his length, then pulled back so as to not choke on him. With a slow rhythm, you did that over. And over. And over again. Joel wasn’t touching you. Wasn’t saying anything particularly dirty to you. Yet you felt yourself drip in your underwear and you squeezed your thighs together.
He must’ve heard the fabric of your jeans rustle because a chuckle floated out of his throat and your eyes snapped open. He stared down at you, head cocked to the side, and had a hard time deciding if he wanted to look at your eyes or the way his shaft moved in and out of your mouth. You kept in a staring match until your hands drifted around his legs and urged him forward even more. At that, Joel bowed his head and was decidedly focused on your eyes.
He obeyed your urging, but with a watchful gaze, he went even further than you expected him to. The head of his cock pressed at the back of your throat. Your eyes filled with tears. One even escaped the corner of your eye and rolled down to your temple. Fingers gripped tighter to the back of his thighs as he pushed the limit.
“Look at you gettin’ all of me in your mouth,” he’d grinned breathlessly, all but shoving the entirety of his length past your lips.
You’d managed to hold your breath while he explored the far ends of the boundary, but with the next breath you tried to take, you choked and sputtered around his length. Joel pulled out of your mouth. Strands of saliva kept you connected for just a moment before they broke as he stroked himself again.
He bent over, nearly folding himself in half to lower his face to yours. Despite your heavy breathing, his free hand cupped around your neck and squeezed the sides of it gently. And he kissed you with lust and fire. No consideration or care for the fact that you’d just had him in his mouth. He lapped at your lips and tongue, drinking you up until you’d regained your breath enough for his liking.
Joel unfolded himself and placed both hands against the headboard again. Eyes glued to you, he watched as you dove forward for his length, and took it in your mouth again. Reinvigorated, you sloppily dragged your lips over him before pulling back just enough to move your mouth down to his balls.
“F’you keep doing that, I’m gonna come,” he muttered through his teeth trying not to paint your face with his spend then and there.
But when his comment was met with a challenging hum from you, he lowered one hand from the headboard and reached behind him, stretching as much as he could while not disturbing what you were doing. His fingers hit the waistband of your jeans and he kept going. He pushed them beneath the tight fabric, and then pressed into your skin to get his fingertips beneath your underwear.
Your legs flinched together when he passed over your clit. You brought a hand up to his shaft for the twofold purpose of pleasuring him and keeping it out of the way while you paid his balls some attention. But with his middle finger circling your button, your mouth dropped open, “please, Joel.”
His response came to you in a soft tone. “I need to taste this pussy, sweet girl. Make me come and I’ll eat you out,”
The lightness of it – despite his words being wonderfully and horribly sexual – caught you off guard to the point that your eyes found his and you licked up over his delicate anatomy. Carefully, you sucked one of his balls into your mouth and rolled your tongue over it. The more you continued, the more you felt Joel unable to keep pace. His fingers stopped and started randomly. Brain slowly losing the ability to function as the pleasure swept through. You switched over to his other testicle and gave it the same gentle treatment when his finger stopped for good this time. He slid his hand out of your pants and curled it around the front half of his length, cautious to not accidentally bump into your face.
“M’gonna come,” he mumbled frantically, giving himself a few short tugs. “Where do you want it?”
You grinned and pulled away from his balls, “anywhere.”
“Where,” he all but demanded. His cheeks were flushed as he besought you for a clear answer.
“Mouth,” you cupped your hands around his thighs again. “My mouth,”
A guttural moan came from Joel and he angled his member at your open mouth with not a second to spare. He spilled onto your tongue with another groan. The muscles in his shoulders and arms tensed up until his orgasm was over. He released his shaft and it smacked down to your tongue. You picked up where he left off and wrapped your lips around him. Despite being wary of continuing gently, his body shuddered when you gave a final suck to him.
“Wait, wait…” he eased his shaft out of your mouth and hand and began to work himself backward away from your head.
Again, you’d only just swallowed when he bent over again and kissed you with an open mouth. He was, undoubtedly, the most surprising man you’d ever come across. Soon though, his lips left yours and he made his way down to your neck, where you stretched out to give him room to do so. His lips stayed by your ear, and ever so stealthily, he settled himself between your legs. Easing your thighs apart so he could drop a knee between them.
Joel kissed and licked your neck for a moment before he nipped on your earlobe, “you’re wearin’ too many clothes.” He smiled at your reaction when you nuzzled your face into his shoulder. “How about we take this bra off?”
His hand snaked around to your back and paused at the clasp until he heard you give him the go ahead. “Yes,”
Within seconds, he pulled away to part your chests only as far as he needed to in order to take the garment off you and toss it to the floor. He returned his lips to your ear with another quiet demand, “arms above your head.” Pride flooding him when you obeyed yet again. He crossed your wrists over one another and held them with one of his massive hands. Joel kept his eyes locked on yours when he trailed his free hand down between your bodies and set his fingertips on the button of your pants. “You gonna let me eat you out?”
You nodded enthusiastically and responded all at the same time, “yes. Please, God, yes,”
Joel undid the button and zipper on your jeans. With your help of lifting your lower half off the bed, he managed to shove your pants down to your calves. “She still taste as good as I remember?”
You giggled, playfully fighting against his grip on your wrists. Testing the waters. “It’s been two weeks, not two months,”
“Two weeks too long when I want it everyday,” he released your hands and kissed his way down your chest, between your breasts, down to your belly button, until he met the waistband of your underwear. He tugged on your jeans and freed your legs from them completely. Spreading your legs wider, he lowered himself between them and draped one of your legs over his shoulder. He kissed your inner thigh while his fingers toyed with the lace at the crease of your leg, “can I?”
“Joel, just do it, pl–” your words died in your throat when Joel pulled your underwear to the side and latched his mouth on your clit. “Please,” you moaned and immediately buried your fingers in his hair. Both of your hands cradled the back of his head, fighting the urge to push it down harder on you.
He opened and closed his mouth around you, craning his head lower to lap at your dripping entrance. “Goddamn. Love that you get this wet just from sucking my cock,”
Just from the way your underwear had stuck to you, you were sure you were a mess. Slicked up and ready for Joel. He wouldn’t need to do too much for you here. Shit, the sex dream itself had nearly gotten you there. Yet he kept working. Licking from your entrance, all the way up to your clit.
You shivered and tugged on his hair, silently begging him not to stop. The noises coming from him – the hums and the moans – were a pretty good sign that he wasn’t going to. He lifted your leg off his shoulder and pushed it back toward your chest. It raised the angle he was able to get at you and he used that advantage to close his lips around your clit again. It made your calf spasm in his hand which he remedied by massaging his fingers into the muscle. And most of all, you knew he was making more of a mess of you than you’d already been before. With each lick and swipe of his tongue, a wave of arousal flowed out of you. He even brought a hand up to your entrance and smeared your slick all over as if proving the point even further.
Joel eased his middle finger into you with his palm facing upward. Your body fought him but he fought back by biting your inner thigh, and a shriek left your throat at the sharp feeling.
You clutched at his hair tighter, tugging on it with fervor, “so good, Joel. S’good,”
He pulled his finger out of you, much to your dismay. But very quickly pushed it back inside. This time with the addition of his ring finger. You let out a coo… a hum… a plea for him to get you there. To just tip you a little further, off the edge, foregoing the wherewithal to be embarrassed by how quickly he could.
You came without warning. You’d thought you had a minute left but there you were coming undone, moaning and trembling beneath him. In fact, the first coherent words out of your mouth were exclamations of apology. You brought a hand up over your mouth, trying to ground yourself as your body still jerked to each of Joel’s movements. Sorry’s passed your lips in a steady stream.
Joel didn’t answer right away. Just removed his fingers from your core and kept kissing and licking your swollen cunt until your body stopped spasming. He kissed up your hip, to your navel, and continued past it. It wasn’t until he pressed his lips to the curve of your breast that he finally lifted his head. He stared at your lips and wiped his hand over his beard to clean away some of your release before he leaned back in and kissed you.
You accepted it wholeheartedly, trying to pay him back for your lack of warning before you came. He’d been aware enough to warn you of his. “I meant to warn you, I–”
Joel pulled away from you and shook his head, “don’t you fucking dare apologize for coming.” He lowered his weight to you and cupped one of your breasts in his hand. He kneaded the supple flesh and lifted his other hand to the side of your head. Lips pecked your jawline until he closed in on your ear. “Want me to fuck you?”
He whispered so softly you almost didn’t hear it. Had you not been so tuned into him, you might’ve missed it. But you nodded eagerly, arching your body off the bed to grind up against him.
His lips stretched into a smile against your jaw. “Take your underwear off,” he paused, waiting as you did so. He only lifted himself far enough up for you to complete the job. Then, brimming with pride, he whispered to you again, “put me inside you.”
“Joel,” you whined, hoping he’d take control of the situation.
But he was intent on matching your stubbornness. “If you want it, take it,” he grinned again against your ear.
This time there wasn’t hesitation on your end. You reached between your bodies and wrapped your fingers around his girth. He nodded softly and you brought him between your spread legs. Careful, deliberate actions until you pushed him past your tight ring of muscle and he sunk inside you.
“Attagirl,” he lifted his head and kissed you tenderly.
You’d expected frantic, hurried sex. The type of starved lovers after weeks away. Something a little more similar to the oral sex you’d both just given and received. But instead of quick thrusts that sent your head into the headboard, Joel let himself rest inside you for an extra minute. He kissed your lips, and cheek, and jaw, before he made his way back up to your lips. Just content for the time being to relish in the feeling of him throbbing inside you, and your body responding to it with tugging clenches.
“Joel,” you whined again.
This time he cupped both hands around your cheeks and hushed you. “Let me take my time with you,”
“I need you to move though. Fuck me. Hard. And now.”
He smiled a little wider. Before he gave you a verbal answer, he rocked his hips backward and then slowly thrust back into you. “Be patient. Let me take care of you,”
It wasn’t lost on you that he was saying that a lot lately. Let me take care of you. If this… mind-blowing sex and earth-shattering orgasms were included in the “taking care of you”, you were inclined to let him. So you bit your tongue and set your hands on his ribs, content to let him take care of you however he saw fit. You doubted you’d have any objections if it was going to end in another orgasm.
Joel’s languid thrusts pierced into you in steady repetition. And though they weren’t fast or rough, they were just as deep and powerful as you remembered. Maybe even more so as the slowness allowed for his eyes to remain on your face; catching every miniscule change in your expression. From the breathless smile that spread across your face when his cock passed over your gspot, to the wince that replaced it when the head of his length pressed against your cervix.
He kissed you again, this one a tender thing that matched the care and precision of his thrusts inside you. Each forward motion of himself into your anatomy fanned the flame inside you. A heat rose in your chest and migrated up your neck and to your cheeks. You saw a similar flush in Joel’s own chest and cheeks. It gave you great pleasure to know you could satisfy him as much as he could satisfy you.
You clutched at his sides a little tighter when a particularly deep thrust made the edges of your vision blur. “Want you to come inside me,”
“Yeah?” He nodded, reassuring, “I will.”
In times past, even if the sex wasn’t hurried, it wasn’t necessarily an event. Not like this. Not like Joel was content to fuck up into you for hours if that’s what it took. It surely wasn’t going to. But not once did his pace quicken or falter. Not when you purposefully squeezed your muscles around him to spit him on. Not when you lifted your hips off the bed to meet him halfway. In fact, he just held you down. Pinned a hand to your waist and forced you flush to the bed so he could keep his desired speed.
But in the effort of once again meeting each other at stubbornness, you decided to take matters into your own hand. You pressed against his chest with force, not surprised when he immediately leaned away from you. He didn’t go as far as to pull out, but he did stare down at you, utterly confused. Just after your last request, he wasn’t expecting you to be stopping him.
“I wanna be on top,” you pressed on his shoulder thinking he’d roll over just as easily.
But Joel just laughed at you and shook his head. He pulled out to the tip and then rolled his hips forward back into you. However, you pushed on his chest again, more insistent this time. Joel caught one of your wrists in his hand and pinned it down by your head.
“Why not?”
“‘Cause you’re gonna go too fast and we’re havin’ a moment,”
You glared playfully at him. If he wasn’t going to let you do it off the bat, you knew you could play harder. Lifting your head off the pillow, you nipped at his jaw, making your slow way to his neck, where you dragged your tongue over his jugular. “I want to ride you… pretty please?” You suckled on his neck and let out an airy whimper, “wanna feel you all the way up in my stomach. Feel you…”
Joel cut you off with a well-placed arm around your back and he carefully flipped you both over without slipping out of you. Victorious, you wiggled your hips, drilling him into you to the hilt.
“Don’t get too cocky. I would’ve come if you said rearrange your guts, so really I did you a favor,”
You rolled your eyes and set your hands on his chest, using the leverage to roll your hips back and forth along his length. You’d play by his rules. You’d go slow and let the moment continue. You wouldn’t try to ride him within an inch of his life just for the heck of it. Shit, you weren’t far off of your next orgasm when he was on top of you. Now you knew your time on top of him was finite.
He kept his hands on your hips as if he wasn’t sure you’d comply with him. Like he’d have to use every remaining ounce of strength to keep you moving how he wanted you to. But on top of him, able to fully harness the friction against your clit you’d been searching for, it wasn’t hard to want to comply. You could get everything your wanted and more. So as your movements kept him deep, and your anatomy clung and pulled at him, you neared another orgasm with haste.
You thought he could feel it coming. You were sure he could. The grin on his face was either because he knew your climax was imminent, or because his was. Either way, it seemed like a good time to you. Your head bowed forward, chin dropping to your chest, and your body stiffened. Everything stopped for you as you tried to fight it off. To make it last a little while longer. But the ever-present grip Joel had on your hips tightened. Fingers squeezed your supple flesh. And he thrust up into you with power you weren’t sure he’d be able to get at this angle.
The orgasm crashed into you and you were only half-aware of the filth coming out of Joel’s mouth. The words, despite being completely debauched, seemed almost normal now. The only thing that caught you was how his expression twisted when you clenched down on him. How his fingers flexed around your hip. And how he then pushed you down on him, making it impossible for you to wriggle away as he came inside you.
You collapsed down against his chest, breathing in as much fresh air as you could get into his lungs. A thin sheen of sweat covered his neck and chest but you couldn’t have cared any less to lay your cheek against it. As your breathing began to even out, you felt one of Joel’s hands wrap around your backside and reach for his member. He eased himself out of you, humming to match the groan you let out.
It wasn’t the time to think about it, but you couldn’t get your mind off the thought of how long you’d get to keep Joel out here. If he’d stay with you a few days. Maybe a week. How were you ever going to leave your sister in a lurch, without help, if you returned back home. Home to Texas.
✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿
Despite having showered before sex, both you and Joel showered again after it. Bound to go back to your sister’s. But you were already back in bed waiting for him, while Joel rustled through his duffle bag in search of a clean shirt and pair of jeans. He’d already asked you in the shower what that funny look on your face was all about. But you’d told him it was nothing, and though he didn’t particularly like that answer, he didn’t press it at the time.
Now as he glanced over at you on the bed and saw the same look on your face, he figured he’d try again. “Spooked?”
You flicked your eyes over at him, “no. Just thinking about how I’m gonna have to leave her here with him.”
Joel nodded and slid a navy blue shirt over his head. “You can stay here as long as you need,” he tilted his head to the side. “I mean, you don’t have to rush home for me. I’m not goin’ anywhere,”
You nodded as he neared with a pair of jeans in his hands. He sat on the edge of the bed beside you and leaned in for a quick kiss. It was there and gone in a flash. Replaced by the feeling of his hand on your thigh.
“I know this is a weird thing to bring up but I feel like we should talk about it before we get too deep into this thing and it gets brutal or mes–”
“I hate this preface,” you mumbled, searching his face for any indication of what this apparently uncomfortable conversation was going to be.
“Do you want kids?” He caught your widening eyes and gripped into your thigh a little tighter as if to keep you both grounded in reality. “I can’t give you any, ‘cause you know… snipped. And before you say it’s reversible or anything, I don’t want to get it reversed.”
“I wasn’t going to say it’s reversible,” you pressed a smile.
“Well…” he took a breath. “I just don’t want to get too far into this if the answer is yes because then I won’t be able to give you what you want. And you deserve that… if you want it,”
“I don’t know. I haven’t met a man that I could see myself having kids with,”
“But what if that’s me?”
“It won’t be.” Off his shocked expression, you reached forward too and set your own hand on his leg, “I mean, if seeing myself with you means no kids, then that’s not even an option to consider if I see myself with you. It’s like you being young… it’s not an option,”
Joel smirked and raised his hands to your ribs to tickle you, “that was kinda mean.”
You nudged his hands away from you and leaned in instead, resting yourself against his chest. “Right now, at this moment, I’d rather have you and nothing than a sub-par husband and a kid,”
“I didn’t say nothin’ about getting married. The vasectomy got nothin’ to do with that,”
“We’ll see how it goes. No pressure. Y’know ‘cause in fifteen years you might be a real pain in my ass,” you winked.
He tackled you down to the bed and smothered your neck and face with endless kisses until you were laughing hysterically.
✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿
The following days passed slowly. For the first time in a long time, you were happy about that. Time wasn’t flying by before your very eyes. You had time to relish Joel. To be continually stunned by him every time he stepped up to do something for your nephew that your sister’s husband should’ve been doing. There was time to lounge and talk. To play around. To be told by an older woman in the grocery store that “you and your husband have made the cutest little boy”.
And when his flight home came a few days later, you drove him to the airport and clutched at his sweater with every ounce of strength you had. Told him you didn’t know when you’d be home, but it would be soon. And he didn’t ask you to clarify. Didn’t ask if that meant in a couple days, a week, or a month. Just cupped his hands over your cheeks and nodded. Told you it was okay. Trusted that you’d come home when you were ready to.
That only took about a week. One more week of watching your brother-in-law sit on his ass while you helped raise his child. You broke the news to your sister and she did her best to hide her fear and pain. You did your best to hide yours, too. On the way out, you also left her with some words of encouragement. To not let him sit on his ass. To force him to take an active role. And if he couldn’t, then to get the fuck out. Though she nodded and said she would, you knew she’d always stick around and be left unsatisfied.
Joel had told you to let him know when you were coming home. That he’d pick you up from the airport. But you decided to let him off the hook. To handle your own business and call an Uber to scoop you up.
He was in your front yard, mowing the lawn when you showed up. He let the gas engine rumble to a stop when the car pulled up. Stood, watching you, with his hands on his hips as you rounded to the trunk of your car and lifted out your suitcase though the driver came around to help you. You murmured an “I got it” to him and Joel found it endearing. How you said that to him on the first day you moved into the neighborhood and put up such a fight at his insistence to help. What he’d learn later, and what this sad Uber driver would never get the chance to learn, is that you were all bark and no bite.
You rolled your suitcase over the curb and let it fall to the half-cut grass. Got up in front of Joel and smirked at him, “you’re mowing my lawn?”
He smiled back. Much more pleasant. “Yeah. It was so long, it was bringing down my property value. You’re a bad neighbor,”
“Yeah,” you shifted your gaze to the grass momentarily. “Maybe I’ll be a better girlfriend,”
A red flush crept up over Joel’s cheeks. He nodded as if he was sure of it. “Probably not,”
Your jaw dropped and you slapped his chest playfully.
Joel caught your hands and held them against him. He leaned in for a kiss. Something rather chaste, but he inhaled to take you in before he stood back up. With a nod in the direction of his house, he smiled again, “go on to the house. I got a fresh pot of coffee goin’.”
“I want to shower,”
“Shower there. I got clothes,”
You pointed at your suitcase, “I have laundry.”
“I’ll bring it in. Go on.” He nodded again in the direction of his home, “I’ll meet you there after I finish up here,”
You relented and made off for his home after one more kiss. Before you’d even fully crossed the street, you heard his old push mower roar back to life. With his front door unlocked, you stepped inside and came face to face with a vase full of fresh cut flowers on the table in the entryway. Like he’d been expecting you the whole time.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x you#joel miller fluff#joel miller smut#joel miller angst#joel miller au#joel miller fic#joel miller fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#tlou fic#the one you need
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Claimed by the devil
Rafe Cameron has always been possessive, but his obsession with you has spiraled into something far darker. When he sees you laughing with JJ Maybank at a party, the thin thread of control he clings to snaps.
TW - obsessive behaviour, jealousy.
The party was loud and chaotic, the bass from the music vibrating through the Cameron estate. You were at the bar with JJ, your drink in hand, laughing at one of his stories. It had been so long since you felt at ease—since you felt like yourself. JJ’s carefree energy had a way of pulling you out of the shadows, if only for a moment.
But Rafe Cameron didn’t miss anything. Especially when it came to you.
From across the room, Rafe’s sharp blue eyes tracked your every move, the faintest smile on your lips sending a wave of fury through him. That smile was his. Not JJ’s. Not anyone else’s.
He stood in the corner, drink in hand, his knuckles white as he gripped the glass. He didn’t blink as he watched JJ lean closer to you, his hand brushing yours when you handed him your drink.
Rafe’s vision blurred with anger. No one touched what was his.
Before you even realized he was there, Rafe was standing beside you, his hand gripping your waist with bruising force.
“Hey, babe,” he said, his tone deceptively calm but his eyes burning with rage. “You looked a little too comfortable over here.”
You stiffened under his touch, instinctively pulling away. “Rafe, I was just—”
“You were just what?” Rafe interrupted, his gaze flicking to JJ with a deadly glare. “Entertaining him?”
JJ raised his hands, stepping back slightly. “Relax, Rafe. We were just talking.”
“Talking,” Rafe sneered, his hand tightening around your waist. “That what you’re calling it now? You’re lucky I didn’t put you through that wall for standing this close to her.”
“Rafe, stop it,” you said, your voice shaking. “He didn’t do anything wrong.”
“You don’t get to tell me to stop,” Rafe snapped, his voice rising. “Do you even hear yourself? Defending him in front of me?”
JJ’s jaw clenched, his usual laid-back demeanor gone. “She doesn’t need to defend me, Cameron,” he said, his voice steady. “You’re out of line.”
Rafe let out a cold laugh, his eyes narrowing. “Out of line? You’re standing here, trying to take what’s mine, and I’m out of line?”
“Rafe, you’re making a scene,” you said, tugging at his arm.
“I don’t give a damn about the scene,” he snapped, his attention laser-focused on JJ. “I care about the fact that this piece of trash thinks he can even breathe the same air as you.”
“Maybe because I’m not treating her like a possession,” JJ shot back, his voice cutting. “Ever think about that, Cameron?”
Rafe’s face twisted with fury, and he lunged forward, shoving JJ hard. “You don’t talk about her like you know her, Pogue. You don’t know a damn thing about what we have.”
“Rafe, stop it!” you cried, stepping between them and pressing your hands against his chest.
But Rafe wasn’t listening. His eyes flicked to you, wild and unhinged. “Why are you protecting him?” he demanded, his voice shaking with a mix of anger and desperation. “You should be here with me, not laughing with him like he means something to you.”
You took a step back, your heart pounding. “Rafe, this is insane. You can’t keep acting like this.”
“I’m acting like this because I care,” he said, his voice softening for just a moment before the anger bled back in. “No one else will protect you the way I do. No one else will love you like I do.”
“You’re not protecting me,” you said, tears filling your eyes. “You’re suffocating me.”
Rafe froze, his face contorting in pain. “Suffocating you? I’ve done everything for you. I’ve fought for you, protected you, and this is what I get? You don’t understand what it’s like to love someone so much that it hurts.”
“I don’t want it to hurt,” you said, your voice breaking.
JJ reached out, grabbing your hand gently and pulling you back. “You don’t have to deal with this, Y/N,” he said softly. “Come with me. You’re not safe with him.”
The moment Rafe saw JJ’s hand on yours, something in him snapped. He grabbed your wrist, yanking you back to his side with a bruising grip.
“She’s not going anywhere with you,” Rafe said, his voice cold and lethal. “Do you hear me? She’s mine.”
“Let her go,” JJ said, his voice steady but full of warning.
“She doesn’t want to go with you,” Rafe hissed, his grip tightening. “Do you, baby? Tell him. Tell him you’re staying with me.”
You looked at Rafe, his face a mix of fury and desperation, and then at JJ, his steady gaze full of concern and care.
“Rafe…” you started, your voice trembling but Rafe cut you off. “No,” he said, shaking his head. “Don’t even think about it. Don’t think for one second that you can walk away from me. You belong to me. You always have.”
The weight of his words crushed you, the possessiveness in his voice sending a chill down your spine. You opened your mouth to respond, but the words wouldn’t come.
JJ stepped forward, pulling you firmly out of Rafe’s grip. “She doesn’t belong to you, Cameron,” he said, his voice steady. “You need to let her go.”
Rafe’s eyes darkened, his chest heaving as he glared at JJ. “She’s not leaving me,” he said, his voice low and venomous. “Not now. Not ever.”
But for the first time, you stepped back, your hand in JJ’s. “I can’t do this anymore, Rafe,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
Rafe’s face twisted with fury and heartbreak, and he took a step toward you. “You’re making a mistake,” he said, his voice trembling. “You think he can love you like I do? No one can. No one will.”
As JJ led you away, Rafe’s voice echoed behind you, a dangerous promise in every word.
“You’ll regret this, Y/N,” he called out. “You’ll come back. You always do.”
But for the first time, you weren’t so sure.
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FAM OUT HEADCANONS
The beginning
Dream Academy brought a lot of good things to Sophia, success, the Kats, the Eyekons and of course, you.
you and Sophia met accidentally, your father was one of the camera operators, and Sophia always saw you backstage. She had thought you were beautiful, but she didn't have the courage, or the time, to stop and start a conversation with you.
Weeks later, you were hired by the team on your father's recommendation (nepotism, Yunjin’s voice), they hired you for all kinds of work. So it was official, you had your first job as a handyman. You were called especially to fix things that the girls had damaged, and when Sophia found out about it, this girl went crazy.
Sophia was very focused, she had good reviews, so she thought "Why not give me the luxury and have time with the kitten who works behind the scenes?"
The sink in the room where Sophia was, magically appeared broken the next day, coincidence, right? The girl was scared to death of being caught, but, oh man, how it was worth it.
When you came to fix it, Sophia made sure to open the door, show you where the faulty sink was, and keep you company throughout the repair. You talked about everything, and quickly grew closer.
Sophia could tell you were her safe haven, the breath of air she needed every day, talking to you was magical, and Sophia loved every moment of it.
Your first date was not called a "first date," at least not for others. You and Sophia knew it was a date, but you preferred to keep it a secret, so as not to threaten your jobs
So imagine the relief you felt, sitting in the audience, hearing the name of Sophia, your girlfriend, being announced as the member of Hybe's new group, Katseye.
The reaction of the Kats
You two were not as discreet as you thought. The Kats always noticed how Sophia went out to mysterious places, with "friends" that none of the girls had the chance to meet.
And it wasn't so discreet when Lara saw your face covered in lipstick marks stamped on the wallpaper of Sophia's cell phone.
The girls had nothing against you, on the contrary, they thought you were very cool, and as long as you were treating Sophia well, everything would be in its proper place.
When Sophia officially introduced you to the Kats, they asked thousands of questions; "How old are you?", "How long has this been happening?", "What are your intentions with our Sophia?"
You answered all the questions calmly, I mean, those girls were very important to Sophia, and Sophia was very important to those girls, you would answer as many questions as they wanted.
Despite all the noise and interrogation, you noticed that one of those girls was very quiet. Yoonchae.
When you first spoke to the girl, you could notice how she was struggling with her pronunciation, and when she said she was Korean, your brain raced.
You had learned a few words in Korean a few years ago. You couldn't say you were fluent, but you had a good grasp of the language.
You swear you'll never forget the smile the girl gave you when you spoke in Korean to her.
meeting her family
Getting through the Kats' approval was harder than going through Sophia's parents' approval.
In fact, they didn't even question it, Sophia's family was extremely receptive, and of course the Filipino girl had talked about you before. So when you arrived you were greeted with friendly hugs from everyone.
Sophia's family was like your second family, you adored them as much as Sophia. So when Sophia went to visit her parents, she always took you along.
You cooked with her mother, fixed things Sophia's dad asked you to do (he always said it was so you would remember the old days at Dream Academy), and spent time with her brother.
At the end of the day, Sophia was fighting to get your attention, but she knows she wouldn't trade it for anything.
my first headcanon ofc, well, I'm very happy that you guys are enjoying "Fam Out". feel free to send things, I love to see your ideas <3
(request)
#gxg#kpop gg#katseye#kpop fluff#katseye imagines#katseye x reader#sophia laforteza x reader#yoonchae x reader#daniela avanzini x reader#lara raj x reader#manon x reader#megan skiendiel x reader#fam out#fam out thoughts 💭
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Phishing Attack [Sulemio Fanfic]
[Gundam: The Witch from Mercury / GWitch, Sulemio, Fluff & Humor, post-canon, married, miorine is down bad, lmfao, self-inudlgent office shenanigans] AO3 Link
Summary: Unfortunately for her, Miorine falls for the IT department's phishing attack test email and has to go through GUND-ARM, Inc's mandatory security training. Fortunately for her, it seems her wife, of all people, was the one teaching it.
-
"Uhm—"
This poor kid. Miorine was going to have a talk with Nuno about this, because there was absolutely no reason for him to send the newest tech support hire to her office for something he could have emailed her about. She wonders if he and Ojelo placed a bet on whether or not he would do it. That wouldn't do. She'd have to give them an earful after all this.
Or, even better, she'd tell Lilique. No one liked to get on Lilique's bad side.
"Is everything okay?" She crossed her arms, trying to school her expression into something... nicer? It didn't look like it was working, because he visibly gulped.
"P—President! I'm here because you—uh. Email."
"Email?"
He looked down towards his feet, his voice barely over a whisper. "...test email that IT had sent out."
Miorine pinched the bridge of her nose, doing her best to even out her breathing. "Hey. It's okay, I don't bite. I can barely hear you."
"You clicked on a phishing test email! That—that IT sent out. Kargan-san told me, to tell you, that you have to attend mandatory training or else your email access was going to get revoked."
She frowned, eyes flitting to her laptop, unable to keep an incredulous huff at bay. Phishing email? She was usually really careful about this, when did she even—she paused.
She remembers now. Last night, while working late from home, she received an email from what she thought was a travel agency. She had been looking into booking a vacation for their family, and wanted to sign up for their newsletter and so she—oh. She clicked a link.
She sighed, deep and weary, leaning forward on her desk. "Thank you," she waved at the young man. "I'll go talk to Nuno."
He sighed in relief, said his greetings, and left.
-
"He looked terrified! Why would you do that?" She growled across the lunch table towards Nuno, who was holding up his tray in defense. "You could have told me yourself!"
"But how was he supposed to learn? Besides, it's a good time to work on rapport-building, for you!"
"That doesn’t make any sense." She slammed down her coffee mug, visibly irritated. "And also totally targeted. You knew that I was planning a vacation for us."
"What, did you think phishing attacks were just randomly cast nets? These things have gotten more sophisticated! Especially for C-suite individuals like you. Do you know what kind of cybersecurity liability it would have been if your email got compromised?"
"I know that!" Miorine groaned in frustration. "Fine, I'll do the training. But really? Revoking my email access?"
"Hey���you signed off on the ops manual yourself!"
"You have to set an example for following the rules, Miorine-san." Aliya laughed.
And she was right. And Miorine hated it. But she always resented authority who didn't play fair, so she was going to do her best to set a good example. She went back to eating, stabbing at her potato wedges with unnecessary force, making Nuno and Ojelo grimace with each stab.
"By the way," he elbowed Ojelo, who was dejectedly playing with his salad. "You owe me. I told you she'd fall for it."
"You two are impossible!"
-
"There's no way they got you too." Miorine deadpanned, looking at the only other person seated in the conference room. It had several long tables, arranged in a U-configuration, and had high-backed leather office chairs that rolled themselves back to place when you clapped. She thought it was a bit much, but... Nika liked over-engineering things, so here they were.
Nika smiled sheepishly. "They sent me an email for a parts sale. I clicked the link without thinking too much."
"A sale?" Miorine almost laughed. "Nika, your department has the highest budget."
"No, not for work—it was uhm. For mobile suit figures?" She twiddled her thumbs. "The little models I like to build?"
Miorine couldn't even be upset. She actually laughed this time (“They were full mechanics! I couldn’t resist!”). Everyone had their weaknesses, it seemed.
"So this is the training video we made for all the new hires, and whoever else needs it." Ojelo was setting the screen up. "It's about an hour long—"
"An hour?" Miorine slammed her palms on the desk.
"Yes, an hour!" He barked back, crossing his arms. "Obviously, since you two are here—our literal president and the person who designs all our prototypes—we need it! I can hardly think of two worse people to fail this test."
Miorine sighed, covering her face with her hands, because he was right.
"Let's just get this over and done with."
The holo-screen flickered to life, Ojelo waved them goodbye, and then Miorine's jaw dropped because—
[Hello there, GUND-ARM, Inc.!]
She knew that voice. It was only the title screen, without showing the speaker, but she knew.
Then the video feed finally came on, and she swallowed: it was Suletta. She was smiling sweetly at the viewer, wearing a business suit that had GUND-ARM, Inc's pin on the blazer’s lapel. She felt the air rush out her lungs, and jolted upright from her seat.
[Welcome to the first module of Cybersecurity 101! My name is Suletta Mercury-Rembran, and I—]
Miorine felt her mouth dry up because why?
She whipped her head towards Nika. "Why is my wife teaching the cybersecurity training?!"
She briefly remembers Suletta mentioning something about getting filmed for a GUND-ARM, Inc. video. It was quite a while ago, and Miorine figured it was just another marketing campaign, but she didn't realize that it might have also been this.
"I mean," Nika shrugged. "She is a literal teacher. I imagine out of all of us she's the most qualified to conduct a training."
Which. Okay. Fair—it made sense! But still—why?
Miorine ran her hand through her hair, grounding herself. Why did she look so good even on screen? Who's idea was it? Did she want to thank them or throttle them?
Why on this ridiculous Earth was she so goddamn attractive?
(A rhetorical question, for sure: she knew with absolute certainty that that was simply a truth of this world.)
[Let's start with the basics: What exactly is a phishing attack?]
-
[14:47 SEST] Nika : It kind of feels like I should leave T_T
[14:47 SEST] Ojelo: lmaooooooooooo
[14:49 SEST] Nika: please let me leave
[14:53 SEST] Nuno: I'm sorry but u are also literally a security risk until u learn this so u can't
[14:54 SEST] Nika: fml
-
It was almost impossible to listen, but also impossible to look away. Miorine put an honest effort into taking down notes, into remembering the tell-tale signs of a fake domain name and the most common typing mistakes made in phishing emails. They even had little quizzes in between that they had to take on their phone before moving onto the next section. Apparently, failing those meant having to take the training again and... and, well, that was both pleasant and terribly embarrassing.
At the halfway point, Miorine had crossed her arms, flushed deeply, and sighed.
"You okay, Miorine-san?" Nika poked her on the shoulder.
Suletta had just flashed another charming smile on screen, congratulating the viewer for finishing this section.
"She's so—" Miorine slowly tipped over, leaning forward, and planted her face on the table, muttering. "—pretty."
-
[Don't forget! Urgent language and unsecured links are really good tells! Are you feeling ready for your next test? Once again, please check your company phone's training app, and—]
Miorine pulled out her phone. She was so ready for this quiz. She had been locked in and could probably recite company policy backwards at this point.
Nika, for the fifteenth time within the past forty-five minutes, tried not to keel over laughing.
-
[Still there?]
Sang Suletta's sweet, whimsical voice.
[Thanks for sticking with it! Good job, we're almost through! You're doing great!]
Miorine had nearly snapped her stylus in half, blushing, but she powered on in the name of professionalism and—spite. For Nuno and Ojelo, of course. Not Suletta.
She checked her watch. They weren't kidding about it taking no less than an hour. She leaned back into her chair, unable to deny the fact that it was nice to take a short break from paperwork and checking spreadsheets all afternoon.
-
She had bolted out the room as soon as the training was done.
"Leaving in a hurry?" Sabina caught her haphazardly stuffing all her things into her leather folio.
"Yes."
It was a Thursday, which meant Suletta didn't have an afternoon class to teach, which meant she was already home by now.
"I'll call for the car, then." She hummed.
"Thank you."
Miorine almost forgot her keys, fishing them out her drawer before grabbing her coat off the back of her chair. It was probably windy, but she was in too much of a hurry to bother putting it on, instead bundling it in her arms with her folio.
-
Suletta was surprised to hear the jingle of Miorine's keys so early in the afternoon.
She looked up from the book she was reading, happy to see the front door swing open. She carefully got up, a smile on her face.
"Miorine! You're home early—" she stopped in her tracks. "You look mad. Why do you look mad?"
And—in the most confusing three seconds of her life—Miorine had pulled her in by the collar, gotten up to her tip-toes, and kissed her.
Honest to god kissed her.
"Whoa," she mumbled against Miorine's lips in a daze. She leaned forward a little, settling her free hand on Miorine's waist, bending down so that her wife didn't have to struggle reaching her.
Finally pulling back, Suletta gave her a hesitant smile. "I missed you too?"
"I clicked a stupid phishing email."
What? Suletta blinked, stupefied, wondering what that had to do with the fact that Miorine was shrugging her coat off and kissing her—again.
"An—" she took a breath "—email?"
"Yeah." Miorine pushed them towards the hallway, and Suletta awkwardly stumbled along with her. "How are you so—so—"
"Eh?” Suletta’s brows furrowed. “Me? What do you mean?"
“So…” Miorine had a frown and the prettiest blush Suletta had ever seen. "Beautiful. In the training video."
There was an almost-audible click in Suletta's head.
She finally put two and two together.
"Oh!" She gasped. "Oh no, they made you watch the training video?" She laughed. "That must have been funny. I was so embarrassed filming it!"
"I think you did great." Miorine was still pushing her, having kicked off her shoes now. She fished the book out of Suletta's hand ("Hey!") and placed it on the nearest table. "But I might have already forgotten the whole thing."
Miorine hastily felt for the door knob to their bedroom, swinging it open and pulling Suletta in by her shirt.
"Miorine!"
"You should remind me again."
-
fin
-
A/N:
Thank you to @saltypyrotato for once again beta reading this! You're the best broski! This is basically some self-indulgent office shenanigans that I can't help but imagine would happen lmaoooo
#gwitch#gundam witch from mercury#sulemio#miosule#miorine rembran#suletta mercury#fanfic#fluff#humor
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mochi soup's sappy happy crying session
i'm so sorry, please bear with me, but i really need to be super sappy rq. (it's gonna be a long one, so imma add the read more here)
i just recently hit 10k likes and lost my shit over it qwq;; i was overthinking a lot, i wanted to run away, and it kinda hit me because honestly, i don't think i deserve all this ;; like i'm just being silly on here and having fun ;;
but that aside, i have been thinking how to properly say thank you, since words are really hard for me (wow big shocker ikr lmao) but i realized it's thanks giving, despite me not being from america i saw all the love today and i thought maybe i can try, this time, to put it to words. (i'm sorry if i don't make sense at all, and honestly don't mind me honestly, i've always been super scared of talking on here but i need to ramble)
so, idk how to start this, i honestly quit art for good like 4 years ago, won't comment on it but this year i tried to pick it back up. i am so scared of people, especially online but i thought why not, so i made a lil acc on here, i wanna say i'm so lucky to have met you all and seeing people like my art, seriously it's what keeps me going. (that sounds so sappy but for what feels like the first time in my life i am genuinely being myself and i am so happy idk what to do) this is way too long of an intro...
i'm gonna start off my twin of course, it feels fitting hehe ;; so, @saltedbiscuiit you know how shit i am at words, and you know how thankful i am for you, and we talked so much about it already so i'll try to keep this short ;; i am genuinely so happy to have met you, kinda feels like it changed my life back then, it honestly hasn't been that long really, since the art trade back in july, i honestly feel like i found my other half (that's so sappy pls don't cry but i'm being honest) thank you so much for everything, you do so much for me, even if you don't know it and i am honestly so so grateful and happy. thank you so much <3 hehe, salty soup salted mochi
the next one is @cryptid-juzou we just recently met, but i fell in love with your writing, almost instantly!! you're such a great friend, and it's sm fun talking and playing games with you!! and i'm so happy and grateful to have met you!! Really, thank you so much for all you did for me and for accepting the collab! To be working with you on our thing (i won't go into detail, yk big surprise and all) honestly, i'm so so happy and i can't wait to finish it!!
next!! @k-aez !! you've been haunting me in dreams, scolding me and i still think about that raw chicken art you did. okay jokes aside, i'm so happy to have met you and i feel the need to thank you like forever for creating the server and everything you've done. you've been supporting me and pushing me to get out of my ass and kept encouraging me sm. i can't put it into words, but i will be forever grateful for everything!
big big thanks to @ohhcinnybuns, @anticidic and @ediblepandas ya'll have been feeding my brain so many good ideas and enabled some brainrot i will thank you forever for. cinny, you know how much i love your fics and your massive brain in general, i'm so happy i was brave enough back then, and did some art of your ideas, idk if i would even tried to join the server if i didn't see your reblog. rosie, you know how much i love your fics, i'm not about to fangirl in public but i'm truly thankful, you've inspired me so so much, i love with your writing, your kitsunezai au and your scream in phasmo still is the best scream ever! pandas, hehe yk i need to thank you here too! your yapping about dresses and in general talking to you is so much fun! i love your brain sm! thank you so so much for enabling me so much, and please send me more dresses, i love them all!
and, ofc i have to give big thanks the chaos trio too @thatghostinyourbog @spccts & @msshinylemon !! yes, i'm calling you that, that name is fitting, shovel fight if you disagree, losers >:3 i have to thank you three a lot, ya'll are so fun to hang around and play games with, i seriously love what you all do, be it drawing, writing or just the way ya'll yap nonstop! it's sm fun hanging out and i love how we bounce off each other so well and ya'll inspire me so much!! also tysm @nolongerforthetainted for babysitting them!! i really love your writing sm and it's always sm fun yapping with you, and also pls make more coleslaw beds!! i need them! but honestly, thank you so much, i am so happy to have met ya'll and i always look forward to talking and hang out with ya'll!!
WAAAAA THAT IS SO LONG OMG BUT!!! I also need to thank each one of you, all my moots and everyone that just takes their time to look at my art, leave a like, reblog, comment what ever really, i appreciate each and every one of you so so much! thank you all so much, from the bottom of my heart, i can't explain how much it means to me! i also want to give a lil thanks to @noakiie @nevertheblood @altruistic-meme @artsyaudience @konbupie @jellyphink & @lethargyinafishbowl i wanted to tag more but i'm so sorry but i'm too scared, really ;;;
idk how to end this, honestly, i feel like i wrote too much and rambled way too much. i guess i'm just gonna-- *runs*
WITH MUCH LOVE AND A BIG HOP STEP JUMP -mochi soup
#happy sappy crying session ya'll gather around i was crying and sobbing writing this and i am not sorry ya'll started this fr#i think i used up all my words for this year#how did i just shit out 1k words#pls don't mind me#idk how to tag this properly#mochisoup rambles#and i never do this here#it's a one time rare event frfr#*runs and hides*
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LETTERS (Wolfstar Oneshot)
Summary: Letters from Sirius Black to Remus Lupin from Azkaban. He isn’t allowed to send the letters so they’re only one sided, which definitely makes it sad. There are a few mentions of fun past Marauders moments/pranks!:) Harry Potter Marauders Fandom
Note: I do not support the views of the author (I am a trans person so....no🤬) but I love these very gay characters so much that I had to write about them!
Word Count: 1k
Warnings: Hints of mental instability, losing memories because of dementors, definite angst, mentions of Lily and James’ death, brief mentions of sex, swearing, Sirius’ hate for Peter Pettigrew, death threats towards Peter Pettigrew, and overall kind tragic because Sirius is stuck in Azkaban. Let me know if I missed any!!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Moons
I'm not sure why I'm writing to you--we're not allowed to send or receive post from Azkaban, but you know that already. You always seem to know everything, you're smart as hell.
I'm not going to waste parchment explaining everything, I already spend too much time rehearsing what I'm going to say. Lily and James, Remus. I still can't make myself believe it, I'm not sure I want to.
I want to ask you not to forget about me, not to believe I'm a traitor. No, that's a lie. I want to ask you to wait for me. I'll come back to you one day, I promise. It’s selfish of me, to hope you won't move on. But I've always been a selfish bastard, you know that too.
I can't remember your eyes, Remus. Or your laugh. I try, every day to conjure you up from my memories, but the Dementors are slowly sucking you from my mind, one day at a time. I'm terrified of losing you--our years at Hogwarts, for good. I'm scared that one day I won't remember what you taste like, your oversized jumpers, the sounds you make when you come. I love you, Remus, and the Dementors prey on love, it's a feast to them.
But they can't take away my hate, my need for revenge. I fucking hate him, I hate him I hate himIhatehimIhate--
Pads
*
Moony
Do you remember the time we shagged on the big couch in the common room and James found out? He was so disgusted he didn't sit there till Christmas.
Do you remember the time that we all got drunk and played Seven Minutes In Heaven and I charmed the spinner so I'd get you? That was our first kiss. I remember.
Then there was that time that we slipped Snivellus a potion that turned his hair pink for a week. We thought it was the most brilliant thing we'd ever done. Did he retaliate? I'm not sure anymore.
Remember when we snuck out to Hogsmeade through the secret passage and almost ran into Professor McGonagall? Did we get caught? I don't remember.
I'm trying to remember. I have to remember
Padfoot
*
Rem
Half my bloody family is in here, you know. It makes for a wonderful reunion, lots of cursing and threats of murder-- just like old times!
I wonder if my parents are proud of me now, after what they think I did. After what everyone thinks I did.
I'm sorry. I'm so damned sorry for all of it, for the way I must have hurt you. I wish I could actually send these letters and wish I could talk to you again. Just for a few minutes.
There are so many things I should have done differently. So many things.
Sirius
*
Remus
I wonder where you are, now? What you're doing?
It's been five years now, for all I know you could be dead or married or finally realized you're better off without me. I wouldn't blame you for the last one.
That thought haunts me every day, that I'll get out of here and I'll find you and you'll say that you've moved on and none of it matters now.
Cause I will find you. I'm getting out of here, one day.
Sirius
*
This will be my last letter, I'm almost out of parchment and there's no way in hell they'll bring me more. Maybe I'll write on the walls to keep myself from going mad.
I'm so sorry for everything that I did. For everything that I failed to do. I never told you enough how much I loved you and now it's too late.
I'm going to get out of here, I promise. I have to.
I'm going to kill him, fucking rip him apart with my bare hands, damn my wand.
And then I'm going to find you. And everything is going to be alright because then I'll be in your arms.
#dead gay wizards#the marauders#the marauders era#hp marauders#dead gay wizards from the 70s#wolfstar#remus loves sirius#remus lupin#moony x padfoot#sirius orion black#sirius black#marauders era#the maruaders#mauraders#wolfstar fanfiction#wolfstar fic#mauraders fandom#rip your heart out#sorry for this#sad fic#fanfiction#moony#padfoot#my roman empire#sirius in azkaban#prisoner of azkaban#azkaban#dementors#hp fandom#harry potter
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*crawls out of the depths*
I’M BACK FROM THE WAAARRRR (I finished chapter 2 of that yandere fandroid fanfiction and I have a few things to say about it)
It was not well written, by any stretch of the imagination. I enjoyed it satirically, don’t get me wrong, but it was BEYOND bizarre and hard to read.
cringe culture is dead, do what you want.
With that being said, let me walk you through my favorite excerpts.
visceral reaction to this block of text. sudden fear and anger. also apparently we fell over from the sheer shock of melody the girlboss but i never saw “y/n fell down” so I assume we’ve been laying down on a skateboard the whole way here. also, adhoc is a highschool here?!!! interesting. call that faulty education system. I wonder if qualia is also a school and they occasionally have football tournaments with adhoc. (adhoc loses repeatedly) also THEY/THEM Y/N??!!!! no way!!! this is like the last fic I would expect to have a they/them reader. Awesome!! we love to see it. also this is like the first time of 2 times we see melody. she just kinda vanishes. that’s an L on the writer’s part ngl.
growled.
growled.
anyways I’m pretty sure “and maria” is a mistake. at the time of when this happens we are accompanied by fandroid and a bot named rose, who idk what she looks like but she’s like our right hand bestie just suddenly. she’s never introduced she just shows up. also maria is like the token mean girl. she has beef with y/n, keep her in mind
again, this confuses maria with rose?!!! fandroid says that rose will “get in the way” (yandere arc incoming) but. Doesn’t do anything about it. you’ll see you’ll see. also INFOCHAN ROBOT???!!! oh god it’s all coming back. I remember my yandere sim phase. also infochan robot has no name and goes by they/them. diversity win, i guess
nooo boy don’t be stressed. it will all be okay. also they have iphones. presumably all of them, but we only see rose and fandroid using them. good for them, i wonder if fandroid has twitter
HE DID IT HE DID IT HE DID IT HE DID IT H
HE KILLED MARIA!!! FUCK YEAH. he threw her off the building. she had it coming. but yeah this is. brutal. but he went from zero to a hundred WAY TOO QUICK. like infobot was like “kill the girl.” and fandroid was like “isn’t there better ways for me to be in a romantic relationship with y/n?!!!?” and then infobot said “I have beef with all of these students. every last one of them. kill the girl” and he was like “lmfao ok I can commit a little murder.” insane. unfathomable.
okay here’s where it gets weirdly heavy.
administration assumed it was a s*icide, and then everyone was called into the gym for the intercom to say “there’s a dead person on campus. go home.” And everyone is crying and panicking (including y/n) because maria didn’t seem out of the usual. and then we get THIS LINE.
fandroid, my partner in crime, you killed her.
like i know this is meant to come off as like cryptic wink wink nudge nudge but it’s just. Lost. It does come off as cold, but not really knowing. silly silly boy
All in all? Funny read. I recommend if you have 40 minutes to kill.
Is it good? No. Absolutely not. I wasn’t expecting it to be. It’s a 1600 word yandere sim fandroid fic. However it had me rolling in like that giddy “this is so silly” kinda way. Maybe it’s just the hyperfixation, but it was throughly enjoyable, I would absolutely force my besties to read this against their will. like I would even draw fanart for this, it was so silly!!
closing notes:
lovely tags. sus
GO HARDER WITH THE YANDERE!!! NOW!!! they just went for classic yandere sim yandere but you could’ve been so unique with it. focus on how y/n feels, watching as these random people & bots go missing. Hell, give us a look at fandroid slowly sprialing from bestie → crush → unhealthy obsession. tell us how he might put up a fight against the urge to kill, until he feels there is no other option. OG yandere chan was “emotionless,” but her crush gave her some sense of feeling, and that’s why she was so promective. However, this au’s fandroid isn’t like that—so… what’s with the murder? Er, well, I’m pretty sure it’s that he hated maria bc maria’s a dick, but after that… what’s the big deal? I’m pretty sure he just hated maria (understandable) but after her… who next? Her bestie? She is mentioned to have a bestie. But bestie didn’t do shit to Y/N. I mean, there’s other stalker behaviors out there, but it’s worth mentioning.
It just. Ends. It’s written like it’s supposed to continue. It doesn’t, and it was last updated September 2022 so I don’t think it ever will. sad,,,
loving the title embellishments. slay
Upon further investigation (me trying to re-find this fic through google) yandere fandroid fics are… strangely common? They’re centered majorly on Wattpad, no shock there. In context, though, it makes sense. (Cue the yandere song; we can’t talk about this fic without bringing it up at least once) Frankly, but I don’t know what I would think fandroid fics would be centered on otherwise. It makes perfect sense. It just shocked me first time I realized that. Every fandom has their keystone trope, and ours is yanderes. Good for us. Love this fandom for that.
Conclusion? Not sure. Maybe just that fandroid fanfiction silly.
This fic was a lot of fun to read, despite it’s many many flaws. Apologies if my ramblings about it made no sense, I have a lot to say.
Excuse me while I go dig my Wattpad out of it’s grave and browse this strange subgenre of fanfiction for what can be classified as purely research reasons. Thank you for your time.
Yes, there is a lot of not-so well written yandere Fandroid stuff. I’ve seen em but I haven’t really looked into any of em beyond a passing glance because I’m not a fan of the Yandere trope all that much and as catchy as Fandroid’s Yansim song is… him being a yandere and being one towards a reader insert just feels… weird? Like not quite right and maybe a little uncomfy.
(Though imagining him doing a murder to perceived romantic rivals only to be immediately called out by a y/n and never do it again more plausible to me. Like he’d be afraid of upsetting someone he cares about, I feel. Or maybe I’m just projecting because upsetting people I care about is my personal least favorite thing. Guilt hurts so much)
Luckily not all Fandroid Fics are “oh what if he was in love with you and totally twisted fucking cycle path about it” and stuff. There’s not a lot though…
There’s the Stargaze AU which was pretty interesting! Not really sure what’s going on with it right now, though. A rewrite I think.
There’s also uh…
SICKDROID - Fandroid AU - superpeeboy - Wattpad
Outside adventures, (A Fandroid based fan fiction) - Hextra - Wattpad
i don’t. I don’t know. Wish there was more or something.
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i sense how on the contrary, when moon is in Zeph’s local group the members will all go ‘omg youre actually letting us do this’ or be surprised of her leniency with almost anything(or if she gets upset she wont be yelling her ass off and will try to remain calm), because of how Zeph would usually be so strict with em and they didnt expect better
see- first you gotta understand that the chancla doesn't really Hurt the iterators. while they definitely can feel through their puppets, those things are made to be sturdy (throw a normal or singularity bomb into Pebs' chamber,he's fine, i know he just doesn't have health but worldbuilding is worldbuilding so i guess a fully functional iterator is fine with blackhole into the head). it maybe stings for a sec but it's not worse than gettin pinched (also where did you get that she yells at em, she's only exclaimed so far i think. if you check how she handled Innocence, that's how she generally goes about it- no yellin for the sake of puttin 'em in place, she's just venting out her frustrations into the air)
the Point of the chancla is to get the target's unwavering attention so she can talk some sense into them WITHOUT using the senior privilege which is far more invading since it cuts straight through their systems and forces the juniors to stop everything to pay attention. these things are giant supercomputers! they are going to have a different perspective on what counts as "too much"/"too bad" than us humans! it isn't used to limit what they are doing unless the thing they are gon do is explicitly threatening to their safety, the limiting is what the Senior Privilege does!
in that lil comic with Pebs, Suns, Nish, Inn and her, she doesn't actually even hit Nish in the last panel, the chancla is only supposed to suddenly appear from behind next to his face n he gets startled + drama queen points. i've admitted in the tags of it that i gave up on the last page so i don't blame anyone for not gettin that since i haven't put enough effort into communicating it
with what she's doin back in her own group, she Needs to be this strict if she wants her plan of keeping everyone reliably long-term safe to work
and her groupmates would undeniably miss her. they love her! they don't want some lenient stranger without constant spice to her instead of their ramshackle beloved Azzie!!!!
#Spot says stuff#rw#oc tag#remember!!!!! important point to her character that also bothered me at some point with how similar it makes her to Moon was that shes Kind#Zeph is kind almost as much as Moon but their situations- concerning all their past present and future- are strikingly different and so#their lives require them to have different approach to things. what Zeph is specifically doin different from Moon is that shes Firmer#strictness isnt wrong!!! if you arent strict on either yourself or the people around you then it is easy to breach boundaries n do-#-Terrible things. its. honestly why i got real sad when a peep asked me to tag that one post as abuse. its not that believe me Zeph would-#-Never abuse another iterator. shes specifically trying to get around that while still keepin them sensible. but ofc ill tag it as such 4 u#look where Moon's leniency got her! dead and hurt and everyone who loved her suffering! there are times when you Need to be firm and cut-#-a bad situation at its bud before it can spiral into something absolutely damning#i didnt include it cuz it isnt Funney™ but after each chancla she talks to the target about why what they did was wrong#Suns you cant send that. it can hurt him very badly. Innocence you need to respect other people. Pebbles this will Hurt me if u keep doing-#-what you are doing right now. it could *kill* me. why are you doing this in the first place? do you need to talk? need me to listen?#being strict and being cruel or dictatorial are different things
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on a note to all: my plotting style is something i like to call i have adhd and if i see you on the dash and have an idea chances are i’ll im you about it. i’m an anxious little dude who isn’t always active in a broad scope, and it’s always been my nature to reach out to people. that doesn’t make me even remotely anxious. not even remotely expected to answer me — i totally get it, sometimes you don’t feel the vibe — but a general psa about how i work. i come from the dinosaur era where the only way to communicate with one another on any level was to directly talk to them and frankly i don’t even know how else you’re ever supposed to plot with a person otherwise. like… how do you write if you never talk????
#CLAWS RETRACTED.#[honest to god this isn’t shade at anyone im literally just trying to explain i am never on the dash and when i am i take handfuls of rando#snapshots to send to whoever’s in my scope at that second. which is i know ridiculous but when you’re me and you’re mobile 100% of the time#because the other 75% you’re doing everything for everyone in your life it becomes exceedingly hard to WANT to stare at a laptop screen.#even if im home im 100% mobile most of the time. basically what im saying is: as an rper i will totally drop into your im’s randomly if#something strikes my fancy. if that’s not your bag i totally get it. the plotting call life has never been mine to own. a lot of the time#it’ll be a person likes it and then you reach out and it turns into ‘haha neither of us have an idea’ which then kills the whole thing.#hence why -i- tend to approach especially if you reblog something or wishlist it and it crosses my path. like. im so happy to try almost an#anything someone wants to give a shot so long as you feel like playing ping pong with me about it. I’ve always been an exceedingly social#person because i just… love people. and for a person literally exploding with anxiety… I don’t do anxiety about talking to people. I USED#to long ago until I LITERALLY forced myself to just… not give a fuck. but honestly? do it scared and now it’s just fucking do it. I#apologize in advance if I can be a pain in the ass and if it’s not your dig I comprehend an unfollow. im a very involved and interested#writer and frankly it’s how I keep myself able to enjoy this hobby by not making it too serious. like. sometimes I read someone’s rules and#im like Jesus Christ I would love to remember all of this but my brain only has so much ram. idk when the big invisible book of online#etiquette was written but I must have been sleeping in class for that one.]
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oh yeah not sure where we're at w money btw. we might be able to get some of it back but we wont know anything concrete until friday
#the fey speaks#which is why i haven't been reblogging the d0n0 post#like. i got $115 total and we Do need to buy groceries before friday and also some of it has already been spent on gas for getting to work#so what i'm saying is the support i got so far has already be immensely helpful#i am just not sure how much more help i will need or by when. or anything. until friday.#and i'd hate to keep askin only to end up not needing it ig. that said if anyone still wants to send me a few bucks while understanding tha#i won't say no. there are many things i need money for in this world rn. like a new belt. been thinking abt a cane. but idk how much it#would help so i haven't been able to justify the cost to myself#but like. there's probably better things you could be doing with your money rn.#also its been really hard for me to get info bc no one (my parents. whose bank acct it was.) wants to fucking talk about it#like. i live here too idk i think i should be allowed to know like what days bills are due and exactly how much they cost!#bc originally i was told (by my mom) that Literally All of our bills were due this past monday. and we would have#no power water or gas. but we still do. somehow. so idfk#and she won't talk to me abt it if i ask she just Stops Responding or walks away#and if i try to ask dad he just responds “i don't know” or starts crying. or like self loathing spiral#so basically. even if we get 100% of the original money back#its ALSO possible we will have a shit tone of late fees and overdraft fees to pay. no clue : )
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good evening to everyone except a certain few fucking anons
#go fuck yourselves like seriously what the fuck#im so sick of this#this is about the last two anons by the way. i havent gotten any more because i turned off anon asks#if you wanna know why anon asks are off blame those two assholes#seriously that stupid shits been getting to my head#you know why? because every fucking person around here (especially my mum) LOVES to criticise me and accuse me of victimising myself#literally every fucking thing i do is wrong around here down to my hair#all these fucking adults like to bully me about MY hair#fuck you if i want bangs I'll keep the bangs#literally it seems like they're just doing whatever they can to change me into someone else. someone they want#this fucking culture of mine is so shitty i swear to god#like they think that BULLYING you is people being honest with you#and that if someone's nice to you theyre shittalking you behind your back#(honestly considering some of the people i see i wouldn't be surprised)#and im not even doing anything thats WRONG either. im different and not one of these people can tolerate that#yeah my mum sent me a video of a goat with curly hair and implied she thinks my bangs are like that. in a derogatory manner btw#so yeah that's had me pissed and then the fucking anons were also making me pissed#fuck you I'm gonna be as selfish as i want when i post on MY blog#this blog is MINE#I decide what i write and how much i wanna shittalk someone who upset me to get my feelings out. if anyone wants to call me selfish fuck you#and you know what? fuck That Person too. they geniunely messed me up more than they helped me#yes. im still gonna talk about them. im still gonna complain because FUCK YOU I NEED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW OKAY#I NEED THIS SHIT OUT OF ME AND IT GETS BACK INTO MY HEAD SO I NEED IT OUTSIDE#and fuck you anons who gave your unwanted opinion. if you cant say anything nice SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTHS#i was taken advantage of and manipulated#and apparently I'm the bad guy for small mistakes like excuse me#and then that person even told a friend of theirs once to attack me (over text) like what#i just cant anymore it needs to be fucking out#and im not sorry for complaining about this because this is my blog and i will complain on here. this blog is for ME. for MY happiness.#and as such i will fucking complain shit and i will fucking post my vents because thats the only way i can send these emotions off for good
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so frustrating when you wanna be someone's friend and they just are not cooperating. I'M INTERESTED IN YOU AS A PERSON. PLEASE INTERACT WITH ME.
#literally don't even care if you ever ask me anything about myself#i just wanna know about you#stop directing the conversation back to work please#we dont even work together anymore and somehow he still manages to always make the conversation about work#if i bring up something else by text he will literally ignore it and just answer the stuff about work#and on the phone he just manages to shut stuff down so quickly unless it's about work and then he has follow up questions and everything#and it's not that he wants me to go away because he's telling me to stay in touch and keep him updated#and that he'll send me links to help with getting a good phd and restaurant recommendations#and so WHY wont he talk to me about anything else#literally something as simple as how his weekend was#he wont tell me#he just blanks the question and asks about whatever work related thing i'm calling about#fucking frustrating man#i wanna hang out with yooouuuuuuu#tell me about your day please#he must just wanna keep our relationship very strictly professional but it's so odd to me to have the boundary be like this#to the extent of not even being replying when i ask how he is like that's insane#surely it's still within the realm of professional to ask how someone's weekend was#it's just hurting my brain because he seems to care about me so much in a work sense and is making sure that im doing what is best for me#and he looks out for me#so it cant be that he really dislikes me THAT much surely????
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do you guys think it’s time to send my parents the audhd symptom master doc i made a month ago
#woke up to my mom on the phone arguing with my dad over whose week it was to have my brother and then bc they’re both going to the states#for thanksgiving who’ll keep him & somehow the convo seemed to shift to where i would be (stay at home or go to the states) bc we talked to#my dad about it the other night and he said i wouldn’t go with him so obviously my mom wants me to go with her#and then she got quiet and then kind of defensive and started saying shit like ‘of course she doesn’t have a job you would know about that’#and more stuff alluding to my lack of employment and inability to drive & im assuming he said something like i don’t deserve to go away ig#bc she was like ‘i don’t have those thoughts or use that language’ and i just know how he thinks so i assume that’s where he was at ugh#and i’m just so done with both of them like no matter how much i explain it to them they don’t understand#why i can’t drive or work and a month ago they both yelled at me for those & other things i do that are common symptoms#so i made a doc with the symptoms with cited sources and everything and then an explanation but i’ve been sitting on it#bc i don’t want them to think i’m just trying to excuse my way out of getting a job but they just don’t get#how much the thought of a mon-fri 9-5 that i have to drive to would kill me. ugh#anyway sorry for the rant i think i’ll send it#stop talking abbie
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#I keep having these low-key frustrating conversations with people I respect about anti-trans laws#one of my favorite profs was asking me the other day what I want to do after my degree#and I mentioned that I might leave geology bc while I like my work and think it's useful#there are problems in the world that are way more pressing than [natural hazard] in [location] and matter more to me#also that it's kind of a bummer/difficult to plan for a long term future here#when I don't know what laws will look like here in just a few years from now...#I live in a pretty safe state but I'm worried about national laws#like to be clear I think a 'need to flee the country immediately' kind of situation is a long long long way from where we are now#but not so unlikely that I can readily put down the daymares about it#anyway I say this to the prof#and he says 'where will you go??'#and like I get what he meant and it's not a bad question exactly but that phrasing sure makes things sound globally hopeless#like 'if you need to leave where would you prefer to go?' would have been so much better...#and then today my advisor asked how my 2024 is going so far and I said that as of this morning#280 state level anti-trans bills had been filed and 38 national ones#and her response was 'why haven't I seen it in the news?'#how tf am I supposed to respond to that?? do I look like the fucking new york times to you????#first I was like 'there are people covering it like I could send links'#and she was like 'I'm not talking about whether I go looking for something... I meant why haven't I seen it In The News'#I ended up saying something about how similar bills are filed in many states so it would get repetitive on npr etc.#and how often do state level bills make it to the national news anyways?#and then I said that even here there had been one filed though I don't expect it will be passed#and she was like 'oh yeah I saw that one in the news'#and I'm like '?????????' so you DO see it in the news hmmmm?#and while I agree with the point that more national coverage would be good part of me still wonders#would she even notice if more of those headlines passed through her universe?#anyway to be clear these are both good people that I like a lot#something is just a little off and maybe it's that they don't quite get it#or that my sleep schedule went to hell in a handbasket so things bug me that normally wouldn't#or both
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Omg hii!! 💜
I need to thank you glows been so much fun! I’ve basically been playing since you sent the recommendation, and now I’m gonna be home sick for a few days (finally got Covid…oops)
If you haven’t played it yet you should try cozy grove! It’s my other fav game rn but it’s more paced so you sometimes have to wait for the next day!
Anyways, thanks again, and lemme know if you end up trying cozy grove 🥰🥰🥰 hope you have a fantastic week!!
#oh noooooo bestie 😔😔😔😔#I feel like a lot of people I know are just now getting covid for the first time#*knocking on wood and holding my breath* cause I still haven’t gotten it yet#first of all I really really hope you get a super mild case and you barely feel it!!#and I hope your taste never goes cause I hear that’s one of the worse parts#but I’ll be around if you’re bored and want to talk!!#I’m sending you a care package with soup and your favorite drinks and your favorite comfort movies and maybe even a super fluffy blankie#but seriously I’m sending you so many healing vibes and positivity#covid beGONE#anywayyyyy as for the games#I’m so so so happy you like grow so far!!!#it’s my go to recommendation when someone is looking for cozy switch games cause I feel like it’s super underrated#it’s just SO cute and there’s so much to do and the music is beautiful#usually I turn off the music to the game I’m playing but for grow I keep it on in the background it’s just so soothing#cozy grove is definitely on my list of games I want to try!!#whenever I get a little extra money that I can spend on a game I’m going to get cozy grove or stardew valley#both have been calling my name for awhile#I was actually debating between cozy grove and grow but ended up going with grow#mainly cause I love farming things 😂😂😂😂 idk why but going onto the worlds and cleaning them up is so satisfying to me!#if I’m ever able to try cozy grove I’ll definitely let you know!!#thank you for the message lovely#I really REALLY hope you feel better soon#I hope it’s just a few days off of work and a minor cold#I’m here if you ever need anything 💖💖#ask#lovely mutuals
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