#We are the flower wives/j(?)

[toomanyfandomsorkinafs]

Get you a bae like mine who lets you explain the whole watchers lore, Life series lore, Flower husbands lore, AND Martyn InTheLittleWood lore in one call as your words bounce everywhere because you can’t talk or explain things without writing it out for over 4 hours🫶

Best part? My /p wife isn’t even in the Minecraft fandom at all! She just sat there and listen and let me talk my bullshit. This is love.

[merlinssassybeard]

'Ex' husband Gojo - The Aftermath- 01

Tags- self harm, miscarriage, mention of cheating

Synopsis- A look at reader's mental state after the entire ordeal with Gojo.

Part 3 // series masterlist

The maid was just about to enter the private chambers of Lady Y/n to pick up the dishes before she stopped in her tracks and started eavesdropping the conversation...

"Taking pills...precautions...pregnancy...we should divorce.....i...carry children......Satoru..."

These were the words she heard. It was as if the ground shifted from beneath her feet. What she heard was the news of the century.

It didn't take her long to run back to her servants quarters and spread the word...

The Gojo household staff comprises of only five women, one is an attendant of yours and two male out of which one is head staff of the household.

All the servants started gossiping about the matter. It didn't take them long to call their friend servants in other big and small households.

In no time the news of The Gojo Satoru and Y/n, the window (as everybody loved to call you in jujutsu society), Divorcing and supposed pregnancy spread like a deadly wild fire...

Satoru was busy in his mission in Seoul, he had no idea of anything and was scheduled to be back in time for the New Year's Eve Party.

An evening event held at the Gojo Clan's Estate which is attended by illustrious people from both sorcerers to non sorcerers backgrounds.

From Japanese Royal family and aristocrats families, The Zenins, The Kamo, The Council of the Higher ups and every other Clans to J-pop stars, actors, models, polticians, wtiters and whoever not!

The Event is a private Party where red carpets and paparazzis are not allowed but the event's pictures sure find their way to Page 6 each year. Displaying the lavish lives of the noble families of Japan.

For the last 4 years, as the Lady of the Gojo Clan, you hosted this lavish party at the main Gojo Estate. Before you, it was your mother in law.

For someone who comes from an average lower middle class family, you have quite the taste in decor, food, fashion, art and knowledge on hosting parties, qualities that are a must for a Wife of high and Noble stature.

Satoru's mother and the entire Clan was very reluctant to have you in the family. She was against this marriage but Satoru being Satoru, her only son and a total mama's boy, she couldn't get herself to say no.

After your marriage, you both, newlyweds, were living in the main estate but after 5 to 6 months Satoru decided to shift to a new house where both of you will start your newly wedded life.

Your mother in law had accepted you in the family after she got to know you and as a gesture wanted you to stay as she wanted to be the"first to get the news of her grandchildren" verbatim.

Every Clan head's wife has a special personal attendant who lives with them in the household. They are supposed to look after the wife as their lady companion, the woman they could rely on.

You too had one, Mrs Kori.

Mrs Kori was your assigned attendant. But she did not lived with you in the same house. You had allowed her to live with her own family, unlike other wives. She only attended official family Events with you as a part of her duty. You have a semi-formal relationship with her.

30th December, 2016

It was about time for the New Year's Event.

Previously, you would enthusiastically start preparations a month prior, considering it is not a small tea party rather a big event where everyone has their eyes on you as you are The Host.

You would rush at the Gojo Estate and get started with placing orders for flowers, preparing the huge garden for guests, writing invitations and a million other decorations. Your mother in law would watch and suggest or support you every now and then since she's been doing this for over 30 years.

But this time, which would have been your fifth year, it was all gloomy.

Satoru's mother was very concerned regarding the both of you. She noticed how this year you didn't celebrate her only lovely son's birthday neither did you began any planning for the Party.

She wanted to come to see what's gotten onto you but couldn't as she took back the reins of organizing the evening party. Although she did let you know through one her servants that she's taken over.

You on the other hand, wanted to recover from everything that has been going on.

Its LIFE afterall. And life is like a river, you cannot stop moving just like that. Moving forward through all the obstacles, IS life.

Your head was convincing you with all motivation it could but your heart just wanted to hold onto the little snow globe containing an Eiffel Tower, one of Satoru's souvenirs that you found by your bed, just sitting in a corner few days ago.

You were aware about the New Year's Event but you just couldn't get yourself out of bed let alone be out of the house and organize a large scale star studded event. All because of everything going on and that day... 25th of December.

You did something which you shouldn't have... a very horrendous action, a very lowly act indeed.

You wanted to go out and free your mind and to prepare yourself to look normal for the new year crowd. The first interaction with people besides your staff since the whole fiasco with your husband went down.

Your friends from the office you worked with before quitting and marrying Gojo, had called you in for Christmas drinks evening. You went and had drinks but later it took turn for the worse when you went to the house of one of your male co-workers who had a crush on you, and spent the night...

In the days following after spilling the entire ordeal to Shoko, you started developing a weird and concerning 'obsession'...

It started accidentally though but eventually you liked it or simply found it better as a 'punishment' for your actions.

It was just an innocent scratch when the glass fell on the ground and shattered and hurt your knee. But slowly, it took a darker turn and you would start to 'scratch' with a razor on your inner thighs.

It didn't take long when you would just think about that night of 25th December while in a bathtub filled with water and you trying to drown yourself in it only to rush out and slit your wrists with the razor in anger and frustration.

It felt weirdly... nice?

@sindela @dazai-gojo-kinnie @whats-humanity-lol @thewickedofrizz @phantasmia @ghostllyyz @yihona-san06 @Enaaneaen @sweet-almond @Angel_🫶🏻@autumn-slaves @wondermilka @hh0peful @kugisakinobarades @witchbybirth @nineooooo @ssc7514 @Hana-patata @blue_spices @haikyuubiggestsimp @urstepmom69 @hueneve @chayunwoo@waosobii @nadzhaf @yoriichiswife @tiltraumadouspart @kirschtein123 @whoisobsessed @Asala @ashthemadwriter @remnirris @svm666 @voidsatoru @staygoldsquatchling02 @dunnowhy-m @nnasv @violetmatcha @dummyf @Noblog @Littledemoness15 @shaiah @iluv-ace @mmeerraa @angellyah @0bakuzan @waxhers @chanelmalandro @shoutobrainrot @narutosolosurfav @Kei-b-gurlll @🫶🏼 @angrydaughter @Screw-aebi@asdfghjkl7things @kodzukenwhore @gabile18 @bollockswhy @pelicanpizza@electro-supremacy @Zatannaswifeblog@spam-and-eggs @guenievresworld @b0scuit@aliventboo @marit332 @bbylime @ieathairs @hells-escapees @no-name222

Apologies if i forgot to add your blog

AN- There's a 2nd part to this chapter, which will be released after few corrections. Thank you for your support and patience.

[ahllohehn]

HERMITS AND THE OLYMPIANS MASTERPOST PT.2 (10/22/2024)

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Hermits and The Olympians/Emperors of Olympus is a Hermitcraft/Empires SMP based Percy Jackson AU based off my art and headcanons!

(Please do not use the tags for other PJO AUs as I use them to specifically label what's based off mine.)

------------------

Seperated by art/doodles, headcanons/discussion, fanfics:

# FIRST MASTERPOST LINK

#90 CLEO HCs #91 JIMMY HCs #92 FLOWERHUSBANDS / SHINY DUO HCs #93 TREEBARK AGAIN YES I APOLOGIZE

#94 HATOLI #95 (CARESSES GENTLY) ETHUBS MY LOVES #96 (STRANGLES VIOLENTLY) GRUMBO ATTACK!!! #97 WELCOME TO HEPHAESTUS CABIN

#98 MY ACTUAL DIVORCED PARENTS (CLETHO) #99 A TRILLION LIONS OR THE SUN? (GRUMBO) #100 GALAXY DUO.... SAVE YOURSELVES, GALAXY DUO.... #101 CUB, MY THIRD FAVORITE /J #102 IJEVIN & XBCRAFTED PORTAITS #103 JOEY CRUMBS I GUESS

#104 I NEED TO STFU ABOUT GEM EVENTUALLY #105 MUMSCARIAN IS IN MY BLOOD THO SO NO SHUTTING THE FUCK UP ABOUT THAT REALLY #106 THE DEAL WITH SCOTT AND XORNOTH #107 ... HOW HUNGRY? (SHITPOST)

#108 HATO!MUMBO SKIN! :D #109 SAUSAGE AND FWHIP... AND POOR GEM? #110 FALSEGEM ... GEMSYMMETRY? WTF IS THEIR DUO NAME #111 WE ARE SO BACK, WELCOME HOME NATURE WIVES

#112 MOTHER KNOWS BEST. AFTER ALL, SHE'S THE WORLD. #113 HANAHAKI DISEASE AS A TREAT #114 DADSUMA #115 TANGO EYESTRAIN #115 PAPA K #116 ONE MORE LIL TANGO

#117 VERY DEMURE, VERY MINDFUL #118 GRUMBO STOP DIVORCING I CANT AFFORD MORE TEARS #119 ABANDONED FALSE PORTRAIT #120 WEAPONS #121 JIMMY CARD + EOO TYPOGRAPHY

#122 GRUMBO AU OF A HERMITCRAFT AU #123 BLANK TEMPLATE FOR EMPERORS OF OLYMPUS ID CARDS #124 RENCHANTING #125 JOEY PORTRAIT #126 JOEL PORTRAIT #127 WELCOME BACK SHINYDUO #128 GRUMBO FAMILY PHOTO (ACCURATE HEIGHT TRUST)

#129 THE GIRLIES #130 HATO!JOEY AND LORE DESPITE MYSELF #131 LIST OF CAMP COUNSELLORS #132 APHRODITE AS ARIANA GRIANDE #133 JOE HILLS PORTRAIT #134 GENDERBENT MUMBO N TANGO #135 JIMMY LORE EVEN IM CONFUSED WITH

#136 HERMITS AND THE OLYMPIANS FANFICTION CONTEST

#137 DEMIGODS AND MAGICIANS (DESERTDUO AND CLINGYDUO) #138 COWABUMMER! #139 XISUMA'S HELMET #140 BIGB PORTRAIT #141 JIMMY PORTRAIT #142 CAMP EMPIRES CHARACTER PORTRAIT SUMMARY

#143 GEM AND ETHO SIBLINGS TRUTHER #144 I LIKE MAKING GRUMBO BE TSUNDERE/SHY TO EACH OTHER #145 STRESSKALL SMILEY FACE #146 POSE PRACTICE - CAPTURE THE FLAG #147 FLOWER RANCHERS #148 PEARL PORTRAIT REDRAW/REDESIGN #149 GIRLBOSS, GASLIGHT, GATEKEEP? #150 GLASSES GRIAN MY BELOVED :) #151 HERMITS AND THE OLYMPIANS FANFICTION CONTEST SUBMISSIONS LIST

OTHER HaTO Related Links:

HaTO Roleplay Blogs Masterpost by gem-the-oracle HaTO Archive of Our Own Series HaTO Discord Server

[xxlady-lunaxx]

Hashira HC!/Tengen+Giyuu+Sanemi

After the war (already screams spoilers-), they made graves for all of the Hashira (including those of which’s bodies couldn’t be buried; theirs was empty of course) surrounding a tree that bloomed w/o a flaw every spring (perhaps the one in the garden in the Butterfly Mansion? Maybe not)

I have a separate HC that Giyuu made flower crowns with Tsutako a lot, so Giyuu would make those and decorate the graves with them whenever he saw them

Around the tree were empty spaces for Tengen, Giyuu, and Sanemi, whose graves were slowly dug for them as they died. Also, I think they would have a grave for Kagaya and Amane, maybe Kanae too?

Tengen stayed for longest (of the Hashira) and buried both Giyuu and Sanemi. He also buried Tanjiro there, where Tengen was supposed to be, having thought that Tanjiro was worthy of it (he’s js giving MC vibes idk why 🙄/j) so Tengen wasn’t buried with the rest of the Hashira- 😭.. (i don’t know why i’m doing this with myself)

The remaining of the Kamaboko Squad made a space next to the circle of the Pillar’s graves for Tengen since they (specifically Nezuko) were touched at his actions of burying Tanjiro with the Hashira

So he wasn’t fully there, but partially, which was the best they could do

Also, back to before Sanemi’s death, he made flower bouquets and placed them there often. Genya’s grave was somewhere else (as were the other rank-and-file DS’s who had died) which Sanemi went often to

Could be SaneKana or not but Kanae had taught Sanemi a bit of flower arrangements just for fun in the past, which he incorporated into his bouquets for the Hashira/Genya

Tengen (and his wives) cared for Giyuu and Sanemi and the Kamaboko Squad as if they were his own children (we love big brother Tengen), making sure to carry out Giyuu’s wishes of giving Tanjiro the best life he could have before his death

After Tengen died, his wives took care of the Kamaboko Squad, carrying them through all the grief and everything despite their own loss as well

I’d say Tengen did a lot of both grieving and caring tbh… I think he would take his jewelry and ornament the graves by placing one jewel upon each grave (including the unnamed Demon Slayers)- He ran out of his precious stones but he felt it worth it

Or, he had one left, which his wives placed on his grave upon his death

No shit this headcanon’s longer than i intended 💀

[likeclarabow]

2023 Books Read

Our Wives Under the Sea - Julia Armfield (Dec 31-Jan 2)

See You Yesterday - Rachel Lynn Solomon (Jan 2-Jan 3)

All Dressed Up - Jilly Gagnon (Jan 4)

She Gets the Girl - Rachael Lippincott & Alyson Derrick (Jan 5-Jan 6)

Ready Player One - Ernest Cline (Jan 6-Jan 10)

Jamaica Inn - Daphne Du Maurier (Jan 10-Jan 13)

Greywaren - Maggie Stiefvater (Jan 14-Jan 16)

The Ballad of Never After - Stephanie Garber (Jan 17-Jan 22)

By the Book - Jasmine Guillory (Jan 22-Jan 24)

Portrait of a Thief - Grace D Li (Jan 25-Feb 4)

Pride and Prejudice (reread, audiobook) - Jane Austen (Jan 31-Feb 6)

Macbeth (reread) - William Shakespeare (Feb 6-Feb 10)

Normal People - Sally Rooney (Feb 18-Feb 22)

All the Dangerous Things - Stacy Willingham (Feb 23-Feb 25)

The Diary of Mary Berg - Mary Berg (Feb 17-Feb 27)

The Witch Haven - Sasha Peyton Smith (Mar 4-Mar 11)

Americanah - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (Feb 26-Mar 12)

The Witch Hunt - Sasha Peyton Smith (Mar 19-Mar 22)

Jonny Appleseed - Joshua Whitehead (Mar 19-Mar 28)

The Mysterious Affair at Styles - Agatha Christie (Mar 25-Mar 29)

Last Violent Call - Chloe Gong (Mar 30-Apr 1)

Beartown - Fredrik Backman (Apr 1-Apr 4)

People We Meet on Vacation (reread) - Emily Henry (Apr 5-Apr 7)

Notes on an Execution - Danya Kukafka (Apr 8)

Kiss Her Once For Me - Alison Cochran (Apr 8-Apr 10)

If You Could See the Sun - Ann Liang (Apr 11-Apr 15)

Murder at the Vicarage - Agatha Christie (Apr 15-Apr 19)

The Appeal - Janice Hallett (Apr 19-Apr 20)

The Black Spider - Jeremias Gotthelf (Apr 20)

Molly of the Mall - Heidi L.M. Jacobs (Apr 21-Apr 22)

The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein - Kiersten White (April 23-Apr 25)

Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen (April 26-Apr 28)

Happy Place - Emily Henry (Apr 29)

Us Against You - Fredrik Backman (Apr 30-May 3)

The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald (May 3-May 5)

Juniper and Thorn - Ava Reid (May 6-May 10)

Meet Me at the Lake - Carley Fortune (May 11-May 12)

Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell (May 12-May 19)

Anne of Green Gables (reread) - L.M. Montgomery (May 19-May 22)

Anne of Avonlea (reread) - L.M. Montgomery (May 24-May 26)

Anne of the Island (reread) - L.M. Montgomery (May 26-May 30)

The Winners - Fredrik Backman (June 2-June 6)

Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier (June 7-June 8)

Peril at End House - Agatha Christie (June 9)

The Many Lives and Secret Sorrows of Josephine B (reread) - Sandra Gulland (June 11-June 12)

Tales of Passion Tales of Woe - Sandra Gulland (June 13-June 14)

The Last Great Dance on Earth - Sandra Gulland (June 14-June 15)

Frankenstein in Baghdad - Ahmed Saadawi (June 15-June 18)

Crooked House - Agatha Christie (June 22-June 24)

Northanger Abbey - Jane Austen (June 20-June 30)

I Must Betray You - Ruta Sepetys (June 30-July 1)

Pageboy - Elliot Page (July 2-July 4)

This Time It’s Real - Ann Liang (July 6)

The Last Word - Taylor Adams (July 6-July 7)

The Fiancée Farce - Alexandria Bellefleur (July 7-July 8) 

The Guilt Trip - Sandie Jones (July 8)

Camp Zero - Michelle Min Sterling (July 8)

The Berry Pickers - Amanda Peters (July 8-July 9)

Family of Liars - E. Lockhart (July 9-July 11)

The Last House Guest - Megan Miranda (July 11-July 12)

The Last Tale of the Flower Bride - Roshani Chokshi (July 14-July 21)

Rolling in the Deep (audiobook) - Mira Grant (July 20-July 21)

Wunderland - Jennifer Cody Epstein (July 21-July 23)

The Stationary Shop of Tehran (July 24-27)

Yellowface - R.F. Kuang (July 27-July 29)

These Violent Delights - Micah Nemerever (July 29-Aug 3)

Wuthering Heights - Emily Brontë (Aug 3-Aug 5)

Begin Again - Emma Lord (Aug 6-Aug 8)

Medicine Walk - Richard Wagamese (Aug 8-Aug 12)

419 - Will Ferguson (Aug 16-Aug 19)

Harlem Shuffle - Colson Whitehead (Aug 21-Aug 24)

Ballet Shoes (reread) - Noel Streatfeild (Aug 25-Aug 26)

Songs for the Missing - Stewart O’Nan (Aug 28-Aug 31)

You’re Not Supposed to Die Tonight - Kalynn Bayron (Sept 1-Sept 2)

I’ve Got Your Number - Sophie Kinsella (Sept 2)

The Adult - Bronwyn Fischer (Sept 3)

Nine Liars - Maureen Johnson (Sept 4-Sept 6)

Small Things Like These - Claire Keegan (Sept 6)

The Honeys - Ryan La Sala (Sept 15-Sept 19)

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea - Jules Verne (Sept 12-Sept 20)

Beowulf - Unknown (Sept 8-Sept 21)

The Mirror Crack’d From Side to Side - Agatha Christie (Sept 21-Sept 25)

Better Than the Movies - Lynn Painter (Sept 26-Sept 30)

Annihilation - Jeff VanderMeer (Oct 4-Oct 7)

And Don’t Look Back - Rebecca Barrow (Oct 7)

Hallowe’en Party - Agatha Christie (Oct 8-Oct 9)

Cannibal Island - Nichlolas Werth (Oct 9-Oct 22)

The Final Gambit - Jennifer Lynn Barnes (Oct 17-Oct 22)

Stalin’s Nomads: Power and Famine in Kazakhstan - Robert Kindler (Oct 16-Oct 24)

Six of Crows (reread) - Leigh Bardugo (Oct 25-Oct 30)

Crooked Kingdom (reread) - Leigh Bardugo (Nov 3-Nov 7)

Sadie (reread) - Courtney Summers (Nov 9-Nov 10)

The Invisible Man - H.G. Wells (Nov 6-Nov 13)

Hamlet - William Shakespeare (Nov 6-Nov 13)

A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder (reread) - Holly Jackson (Nov 11-Nov 15)

Good Girl, Bad Blood (reread) - Holly Jackson (Nov 15-Nov 18)

As Good as Dead (reread) - Holly Jackson (Nov 20-Nov 23)

Red White and Royal Blue (reread) - Casey McQuiston (Nov 25-Dec 5)

The Secret History - Donna Tartt (Dec 18-Dec 22)

The Day of the Jackal - Frederick Forsyth (Dec 24-Dec 25)

Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries - Heather Fawcett (Dec 25-Dec 27)

Murder in the Family - Cara Hunter (Dec 28)

Three Holidays and a Wedding - Uzma Jalaluddin, Marissa Stapley (Dec 29)

The Book of Cold Cases - Simone St James (Dec 30-Dec 31)

[dhr-ao3]

your great deserts repay

your great deserts repay https://ift.tt/phlPqFd by middlemarch ...“I really wish I could have gotten to know her,” Hermione replied, watching Draco’s profile as she spoke, “Everything you tell me about her just makes me think we would have gotten on splendidly.” His eyes finally returned to her, still cool and distant, but with a slight warmth buried deep within: occlumency holding several feelings back from her. “Like a house on fire, I assure you.” -- "an ever-fixed mark," ninepiecesofcrait This is what "getting on splendidly" looks like, when one of you is on the other side of the Veil and has no plans to pick-up a side gig as a ghost. Matagot is there, as always, for the assist. OR, watch as I fangirl/person all over "an ever-fixed mark." Words: 4526, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/M Characters: Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Scorpius Malfoy, Astoria Greengrass, Harry Potter, Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter, Theodore Nott/Harry Potter, Astoria Greengrass/Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Scorpius Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Astoria Greengrass, Astoria Greengrass & Blaise Zabini Additional Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Epilogue, Alternate Universe - Post-War, Marriage, Dad Draco Malfoy, Domestic af, Epistolary, Gift Fic, Love Letters, wives dishing, semi-sentient magical house for the win, Matagot is always the best wing-creature, references to NottPott, Family, Family Dynamics, less Occluding, so many parentheticals, in which Hermione's interior monologue has an interior monologue, references to Regency romance, well-read women, Teasing, Kid Fic, cooking as a love language, Spoiling Kink Returns, Language of Flowers, Does Not Pass the Bechdel Test, Names, Blood Curses | Blood Malediction (Harry Potter), some world building of my own, references to period sex, Female Gaze, POV Hermione Granger, Adult Hermione Granger, Adult Draco Malfoy, good stepmother Hermione, Female Friendship, writing the author's note was a whole PROJECT, strongly in the 'grey' camp over here, Fertility Issues, subtly secular Jewish heritage Hermione Granger, the sex scene is a fade to black via AO3 works tagged 'Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy' https://ift.tt/Q7SO1hZ March 02, 2024 at 01:43PM

[skydoesthings]

Problems with the shippers of the ships I ship

(its all just a joke calm down guysss)

Scarian - never really left that desert and built a house in the cactus ring and moved in with the jellies :')

Ahasbands - took that one joke martyn made about being married to mumbo a bit too seriously ;-;

Rendoc - firm believers of "they fucked in those sniffer onesies" -_-

Ethdubs - set on destroying impulse and bdubs's marriage >:J

Shiny duo - laughing evilly while writing in a fuzzy unicorn journal with a sparkly pink pen(┬┬﹏┬┬)

Flower ranchers - cannot decide whether flower husbands or ranchers X_X

Nature wives - gonna murder joey teehee (●'◡'●)

Lizleo - (think thats what theyre called? its just cleo x lizzie) - betrayal? I don't remember any betrayal （*＾-＾*）

Mythicalbeans - (dont know if thats what theyre called either but fuck it we ball cuz its joel x sausage) - Who cares if joel's married to lizzie? sausage and joel have a child *steadily ignoring the fact that its a lore child and not a real one* (～￣▽￣)～

Kerisuma - (AHHH IDK THE NAME OKKKKKK ITS JUST KERALIS AND XISUMA) - The dads of the server MUST be together o((>ω< ))o

Xbeef - I. saw it in a vision. and. I need more. ￣へ￣

Stresskal - the modded sillies ever ^3^

[ao3feed-drastoria]

your great deserts repay

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/uNqx8lK by middlemarch ...“I really wish I could have gotten to know her,” Hermione replied, watching Draco’s profile as she spoke, “Everything you tell me about her just makes me think we would have gotten on splendidly.” His eyes finally returned to her, still cool and distant, but with a slight warmth buried deep within: occlumency holding several feelings back from her. “Like a house on fire, I assure you.” -- "an ever-fixed mark," ninepiecesofcrait This is what "getting on splendidly" looks like, when one of you is on the other side of the Veil and has no plans to pick-up a side gig as a ghost. Matagot is there, as always, for the assist. OR, watch as I fangirl/person all over "an ever-fixed mark." Words: 4526, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/M Characters: Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Scorpius Malfoy, Astoria Greengrass, Harry Potter, Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter, Theodore Nott/Harry Potter, Astoria Greengrass/Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Scorpius Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Astoria Greengrass, Astoria Greengrass & Blaise Zabini Additional Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Epilogue, Alternate Universe - Post-War, Marriage, Dad Draco Malfoy, Domestic af, Epistolary, Gift Fic, Love Letters, wives dishing, semi-sentient magical house for the win, Matagot is always the best wing-creature, references to NottPott, Family, Family Dynamics, less Occluding, so many parentheticals, in which Hermione's interior monologue has an interior monologue, references to Regency romance, well-read women, Teasing, Kid Fic, cooking as a love language, Spoiling Kink Returns, Language of Flowers, Does Not Pass the Bechdel Test, Names, Blood Curses | Blood Malediction (Harry Potter), some world building of my own, references to period sex, Female Gaze, POV Hermione Granger, Adult Hermione Granger, Adult Draco Malfoy, good stepmother Hermione, Female Friendship, writing the author's note was a whole PROJECT, strongly in the 'grey' camp over here, Fertility Issues, subtly secular Jewish heritage Hermione Granger, the sex scene is a fade to black read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/uNqx8lK

[shiptowreck]

been seeing end of year reading posts going around and wanted to share the list of everything i read this year!! it’s under the cut if you’re interested :)

1. Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed

2. The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas by Ursula K. Le Guin

3. Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir

4. Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson

5. Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen

6. Mysteries of Thorn Manor by Margaret Rogerson

7. Educated by Tara Westover

8. Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel

9. Poison Study by Maria V. Snyder

10. Trainspotting by Irvine Welsh

11. Joan by Katherine J. Chen

12. Killers of the Flower Moon by David Grann

13. Hamnet by Maggie O’Farrell

14. Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin

15. Superfan by Jen Sookfong Lee

16. Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austin

17. Parable of the Sower by Octavia E. Butler

18. The Book of the Unnamed Midwife by Meg Elison

19. Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner

20. Idol Burning by Rin Usami

21. The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon

22. The Disaster Tourist by Yun Ko-eun

23. Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin

24. The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls

25. Bones and All by Camille DeAngelis

26. Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk

27. Once There Were Wolves by Charlotte McConaghy

28. Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata

29. Sky in the Deep by Adrienne Young

30. Our Wives Under the Sea by Julia Armfield

31. Swimming in the Dark by Tomasz Jedrowski

32. The Fifth Season by N.K. Jemisin

33. Get Rich or Lie Trying by Symeon Brown

34. Into the Drowning Deep by Mira Grant

35. A Stolen Life by Jaycee Dugard

36. Found: An Anthology of Found Footage Horror Stories

37. Survivor by Chuck Palahniuk

38. None of This Rocks by Joe Trohman

39. The Radium Girls by Kate Moore

40. Burial Rites by Hannah Kent

41. We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson

42. Near the Bone by Christina Henry

43. The Road by Cormac McCarthy

44. The Lonely City by Olivia Laing

45. Slewfoot by Brom

46. Moon of the Crusted Snow by Waubgeshig Rice

47. Uprooted by Naomi Novik

48. In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado

49. Migrations by Charlotte McConaghy

50. Pedro Páramo by Juan Rulfo

51. Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson

i’ve also just started Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer so we’ll see if i finish it before the new year !

i’d love to hear about the books you read this year or talk about some of the ones on my list!!! i’ve had so much fun making new mutuals and whatnot this year and i hope you all have a great year of reading in 2024! <33

[rei-the-head-shaker]

5th - 11th of June

"Deja Vu" by Uki Violeta, PrettyPatterns 🖤

"청개구리" by

"Cold, Cold, Cold" by The Family Crest

"Craving - Acoustic" by Ymir 🖤

"LIAR" by Jay Chang

"Absense" by Anthemics, Orry Maine

"To Be Loved" by Askjell, AURORA

"Prime" by Roan Martin

"August" by Vanisa Khamkhosy

"We Have It All" by Pim Stones

"Sleepy Hollow" by Su Lee 🖤

"Landscapes" by Lor 🖤

"APHRODITE" by Ethan Gander

"Nightfire" by Juniper Vale

"Winter Came Too Fast" by Erik Peers, Juniper Vale

"Contrôle" by Marius

"Spiderwebs" by Alfie Jukes

"Dancing in a daydream" by Roses & Revolutions, Weathers

"Close to You (SEUNGMIN of Stray Kids)" by Stray Kids

"Lily of the Valley" by Miranda Elloway

"Honeymoon Un Deux Trois" by *Razzy, RAVEN 🖤

"Flower Maiden (Guda Folk Choir)" by Dzivia

"If The World Falls To Pieces" by Young Summer 🖤

"The Moon Will Sing" by The Crane Wives

"Borealis" by Ethan Hibbs

"Queen of Disaster" by Lullanas

"Violin" by Sophie Morelli

"Hymn for Her" by Ames

"Feeling Like a Woman Lately" by NoSo

"Machine Learning" by J. Maya 🖤

[ask-the-esmp-emperors]

Shrub: SH-SHUT UP! Joey: Oh my god, you are SO red, Shrub! Katherine, try to say it's platonic NOW! Katherine: She- uh- Shrub, can we talk about this later? [radio silence from Shrub, but giggles can be heard, presumably from Joey.] Shrub: Fine- SHUSH, Joey! {ooc// buy one nature wives, get one flower husbands free /j}

OHHHH SHRUBBBBBBB~!

I saw you staring at Katherine when they came to save youuu you silly lil gay gnome.

Shrub: Sh-shut up! I don't know what you're talking about! I wasn't blushing! Joey: Oh, you definitely were! You are ALWAYS blushing around Katherine! [giggles, presumably from Joey.] Katherine: Joey! Don't tease her! I'm sure she means it like, platonically! Jimmy: How oblivious can someone be? Scott: How long did it take you to realize I love you, again? Dummy. Jimmy: SHUT UP!

[sometipsygnostalgic]

what are entraptas thoughts on marriage

is that some kind of food? /j

Weddings might be her favourite thing because there's lots of REALLY CUTE food, everyone dresses adorably and is really sappy and sensitive, lots of social interactions both to analyse when she's worn out and to participate in when she's feeling like it.

You absolutely BET that, if someone is having a wedding, they're getting her to do something, because nobody is better at organising cute matching outfits or little decals, lots of things that you'd get at a wedding. It's kind of her secret skill, as we saw in season 5. Not to mention she and Bow will be bombarded with commissions for making personal gifts. 

Glimmer certainly competes for the mantle, though. Glimmer really, really wants to be the group Wedding Planner, but she needs lots of support from Bow so she doesn't get carried away. Bow needs Glimmer there because he will just break down into happy tears every time he starts thinking about whoever's wedding.

And Mermista STILL wants to do the flower arrangement. She just... works with Perfuma this time. Also, Netossa and Spinerella are really good at making cute cakes. They ask everyone for help with the designs. Adora and Entrapta, it turns out, both have an absolute shedload of cute cupcake design ideas, but neither character can bake without setting the kitchen on fire because they always try to "improve" the baking process and go too far.

As for marriage, doubt anyone in She-Ra would give a shit about the formality of marriage. It's very much a religious thing. They don't care about being wives, husband and wife, husbands. They just really like weddings.

I can't stop thinking of this gift art by Stevenson to Josie, one of the head writers who endlessly joked about a “mass wedding”. It is obviously not canon, but it makes me so happy :P look how excited and sappy Entrapta is. That's the energy she would have about a wedding. Adora and Bow crying in the background too. I can't help but feel they would all have the same love for it :P

[straydawg-writing]

𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖌𝖊𝖙-𝖒𝖊-𝖓𝖔𝖙

ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ ᴏꜱᴀᴍᴜ.

• bungo stray dogs series

chapter 3: 𝖉𝖆𝖋𝖋𝖔𝖉𝖎𝖑 — 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖗𝖙 𝖔𝖋 𝖘𝖔𝖒𝖊𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖌

✥ ⊱ ────── ♔ ────── ⊰ ✥

┊       ┊      ┊   ┊    ┊       

┊       ┊      ┊ ✫   ˚✩

┊       ┊      ✫

┊       ┊      

┊ ⊹     ☪︎⋆

✯ ⋆ 

˚✩

"COME IN."

it nearly took all of kita's might to push open the monstrous gothic-styled doors of the boss' office. as of late, mori had been assigning her more and more tasks that she readily accepted. she had nothing else to do, no other reason to live, except for dedicating herself to the port mafia.

daylight emanated from a long wall of floor-to-ceiling windows, brightening up the dark space and shining on the royal maroon carpet. ahead of her sat the boss, in all of his dignity and glory.

"you called?" kita began, standing tall when she spoke.

mori was not a man she wanted to appear frail in front of. kita was confident she would win over his trust and respect in due time, and was determined not to waste the chance he had given her when he had taken her in. as a woman in the port mafia, she had to work harder than anyone else to be taken seriously. many believed that she didn't belong there, but she was okay with that. after all, kita had no intention of being mixed with juvenile delinquent men.

"you did well on your last job. but of course, you know that i can't have you rest and let that eager spirit rot away."

"i'd expect that, boss. what did you have in mind?" kita asked, twiling a strand of black hair between her fingers.

"this job involves retrieving the marcello family's confidential files. they've attempted hiding a business of money laundering despite our... how should i say this? our 'small' warning example. the mission should be easy enough."

the sound of tall double doors parting open echoed throughout the room and interrupted kita's response. she felt the presence of someone else coming in, stopping only when they were right next to her.

"hey, boss."

"nice to see you dazai," mori greeted the boy, intertwining his hands and resting them on his desk.

dazai was here. why did she suddenly feel butterflies, when not even meeting the port mafia boss stirred nerves like these within her?

"i don't understand. if the mission is so easy, what is he doing here?" kita glanced his way, startled when she saw him staring back.

"did i forget to mention? although just one person is needed to steal the item, this mission requires two people. the marcello family enjoys their parties. you'll be infiltrating their next one, as an unsuspecting couple."

everything slowed down. kita was sure she misheard, mori's last words hanging on his lips and repeating in her mind like a mantra. go as a couple?

you could ask her to kill an army of men and it would be simpler than this. she had only just met him last night –no– it would be easier if she didn't know him at all.

"is that agreeable with you, kita?"

it wasn't like she had a choice, a job was an order in disguise. mori had that same look on his face that he pulled whenever he was picking out a new babydoll dress for elise. the man was up to something, and she wasn't sure how to feel.

"sounds good to me!" dazai answered for her, shoving his hands in his pockets.

then it was settled. looking towards the bandaged boy, kita shook off her wariness and cracked a smile. she wouldn't mind getting to know him better.

"alright. how bad could it be?"

-

kita's mirror reflection stared back at her, beauteous and sweet. a silk black dress hung daintily on her hips, and a laced corset traced her curves. ringlets of jet-black hair spilled over her collarbones, the midnight shades creating a striking contrast with her ivory pearl skin that was spellbinding. she sighed as she closed the drawer which held her lipstick. despite her natural desire to stand out in a crowd, kita knew that tonight she would be dressing to blend in. still, she couldn't help but ask herself in the back of her mind if she was dressing to impress.

'it's just a mission. just a mission. just a mission,' she told herself as she twisted open the doorknob of her room. little did she expect to see the man himself, standing right outside of her bedroom door.

"how long have you been standing there?" she rested her hand on her hip, pursing her lips.

"from my perspective, it looks like you were the one waiting for me to get here," dazai said, holding out a single red camellia flower.

"'you're a flame in my heart', huh?" kita observed, taking the flower in her pale hands.

"is that a confession?" he asked, with a cheeky grin.

oh, so he's a flirt.

"that's just what the flower means, stupid."

she took this chance to take in the sight of him. his hair was the same as always –tousled chocolate locks falling over his sweetly intense brown eyes– and you were glad he hadn't changed it. dazai's usual bandages were covered up by the sleeves of his black slate tux. the suit looked made for him, fitting his body perfectly in every crevice. you had to admit, dazai looked a little bit handsome.

"i know, i asked chuuya. who knew he spoke flowers too? although... he did try starting a fight in the middle of the courtyard, calling me an 'enemy of all women,'" dazai pouted, making finger quotations before he quickly changed moods again. it was something she had noticed he seemed to do often. his playful eyes were now dripping with a more flirtatious undertone.

"the boss ordered us to personate two fiances madly in love. so... let's play the part, shall we?" dazai mischievously bowed down to her height, gently taking kita's small hand in his and leaving a kiss on her smooth skin. he knew he had caught her in his trap- she couldn't argue with the boss himself.

kita let out a small exhale, interlacing his hands with her own.

"fine, you win. but drop the 'madly in love.'."

-

"mr. and mrs. iwazaki-to-be?" the doorman asked for confirmation, with a paper and quill to cross off guest names.

"that's us!" dazai enthusiastically expressed with an arm around kita, placing a kiss on her temple to sell the act.

the doorman, who seemed to be in his late sixties, looked up from his paper and sent the pair a warming smile.

"i miss my girl every day... congratulations." he held up his ring finger to show them, and motioned for them to join the party. "enjoy the night!"

the pair entered the party through a towering marbled creme archway. space had opened up to accommodate a grand scene of painted people with most likely debatable motives, drinking from their champagne glasses and dancing to a luxurious orchestra. a waft of expensive colognes and perfumes flooded their senses. it smelt like the rich. businessmen stroke deals, wives exchanged the newest slice of gossip, and old men watched from the sidelines, whistling for girls in their royal dresses of all colors.

kita suddenly developed an appreciation for not having come alone. the fake engagement ring decorating her ring finger marked her as claimed. in other words: kept the old, perverted, corrupted politicians away. not as if she couldn't beat them to a pulp if need be.

a large marble staircase that matched the entrance winded the perimeter of the main floor, leading up to the room which held their files. but for now, their foremost concern was appearing ordinary, becoming like everybody else of the night. to play the part of the happy-go-lucky-couple-in-love.

the boss had asked her first. this was her mission.

grabbing dazai by the chin who was distracted by the red-velvet cupcakes on display, kita turned his face down to look at her.

"dance with me."

"okey. but yowr sqwuisching mey fasce," dazai replied, face indeed squished as his lips were forced into a pout. she let go with a grin, satisfied with his response.

maneuvering through men in studded suits and women in extravagant dresses that took up half of the floor, a new waltz had begun by the time she pulled him onto the dance floor with her.

"i forgot to tell you earlier, but you clean up really nicely, dazai." kita commented, her arms loosely tangled around his neck.

they turned elegantly, in tune with the slow music, and standing closer than ever before. kita could feel his breath on her skin as he held her waist. this close to him, his natural scent was intoxicating. he was rich, like caramel. a breath of fresh air from the sea of headache-inducing colognes. if by the end of this dance, her breath was taken away, she would know why.

"you look... irresistible," dazai's eyes widened slightly. he kept his attention on her as he whimsically guided the girl across the dance floor, taking her anywhere he pleased– and she let him. no matter what dazai did, he always had the same fanciful air about him. even now, she felt he was taking her into a dream.

the warmth between them continued to increase, along with their rising heartbeats, until the song had faded into the distance and the only thing that mattered was their steps in sync, their breathing one.

'it's all an act.'

"let's find a room upstairs," he whispered in her ear, pulling her out of the crowd and up the staircase once the song had ended.

any guests attending the event were too engrossed in their own party and pleasure to notice them disappear. from where kita stood, she could see them all dancing like porcelain dolls in a make-believe show.

"this one." dazai pointed, opening a door with a plaque that read, 'j. marcello's office.'

time was of the essence, and yet dazai didn't seem the least bit concerned as he strolled over to the mahogany desk that sat underneath a window. he opened one drawer in particular with a mass of cigarettes the owner had never bothered throwing out, and tossed them all into the trash can.

"if he wants to meet his end with an insufferable death, this'll do it." dazai tsked and shook his head as he tossed another one behind him and scored. "couldn't ever be me..."

"don't you think he'll notice?"

"he'll also notice when his papers are gone. i'm simply doing him a favor~" dazai chuckled.

kita was digging through files and trying to distract herself from the taller male as much as possible, ever since the dance they shared so intimately lingered in her mind. she was so distracted that she didn't hear the sudden sound of a door opening, and just as quickly as the door opened, she had been pulled into dazai's embrace and leaned over the desk.

his soft lips crashed into hers, causing an obvious expression of surpise as she felt his warm hands riding up the side of her face, the other arm leaning on the desk behind her and trapping her underneath him– but she guessed it was only to give the mysterious person the wrong idea.

she only hesitated for a moment before kissing him back, going along with the act as she pulled on his tie to regain her balance. the kiss barely lasted about five seconds, but to kita it felt like an eternity. his kiss was so sudden she had already ran out of breath and was running on nothing at all but his own oxygen.

"s-sorry! you can't be in here!" an embarrassed voice called out, shutting the door as soon as it had opened.

when the door had closed, dazai swiftly released his hold on her.

"all that and still no files," he sighed, scratching his head.

"you sure about that?" kita smirked, running her tongue over the lingering taste of sugar-coated lips. peaking from behind her back was a folder that she had stolen from the drawer's hidden compartment.

"kita! oh i could kiss you," dazai's mouth opened in childish awe. if this were an animation, his eyes would have sparkled.

"you already did. guess you couldn't resist huh?"

"aren't you the one who kissed me back?" he raised an eyebrow.

"touché," she clicked her tongue, rolling the folder and hiding it in her bra while walking out of the room with dazai in tow.

"wow, you can fit that in there?" he pondered out loud.

"of course i ca-" she began, before being cut off by a horde of men in black suits, guns pointed.

"IT'S THEM! don't even TRY letting them escape," a voice boomed, with a round of gunshots firing all around them soon after.

kita sighed, uninterested in the new turn of events. she could use her ability now, but it wasn't worth it. they had gotten what they came for, so whatever happened now was of no concern to her. dazai slowly turned around, eyes coming to an emotionless standstill as he allowed the bullets their chance to plunge into him, but always missing.

"geez, your aim sucks." kita stated, pulling her own knife out of a leg garter that hid underneath her dress and sending it piercing through the cheeks of a full line of men.

they dropped, guns casting across the floor. dazai blankly considered them before picking one up for himself.

"i hope you don't mind if i borrow this," he drawled, flipping it over in his hands before stretching out his arm in front of him and shooting the men left. he aimed to kill.

with that taken care of, kita bent down and plucked her knife out of the unfortunate victim's flesh. she wiped it off on the fabric of her black dress.

"p-please. don't kill me," the timid cry of a sole survivor pleaded for his life.

he was bowed to the ground, blood seeping through his suit and making it an impossibly darker shade of vantablack. what a shame he still lived.

with one look from dazai who lazily reached a hand for a crimson-red cupcake, he aimed and shot with the other.

the party was all but dead now.

in the midst of the bloodbath, dazai had taken a bite out of the dessert, and now white frosting dusted the tip of his nose like snowflakes. using her thumb, kita wiped the icing away and licked the sweetness off of her finger.

"hey!"

"you took too long to eat it!" she explained after stealing the cupcake away from him, eating the rest of it as as they stepped out from the bloodied marble walls and into the black of the darkened night.

｡✣✤✥━━━━━━━━━━━━✥✤✣｡

❝𝙰𝙿𝙾𝙲𝙾𝙻𝚈𝙿𝚂𝙴❞

1:05  ──♡────── 2:53

|◁              II             ▷|

— ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪᴘꜱ, ᴍʏ ʟɪᴘꜱ, ᴀᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘꜱᴇ

ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪᴘꜱ, ᴍʏ ʟɪᴘꜱ, ᴀᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘꜱᴇ

｡✣✤✥━━━━━━━━━━━━✥✤✣｡

[cto10121]

Prince of Shadows (2014): Part 3

In which the Mercutio/OC drama becomes a tad contrived, Romeo becomes even more OOC, and Benvolio/Rosaline is much better than R&J’s, we swear!!!! Spoilers of course

This is genuinely sad and dramatic, and for once Benvolio is not a dick, so I’m not going to point out that lords with mistresses and/or male lovers were extremely common in these times so Mercutio keeping Tomasso would have been perfectly possible. Marriages are for alliance, after all, not love, and nobody dared touch the lords. Some wives even knew and probably preferred it that way. But I’m not going to do that. Nope.

So nice to see Mercutio being so considerate, so I’m not going to say that giving up a serious five-year relationship in Tomasso for the sake of a girl he doesn’t know must be the most un-Mercutio thing I can think of.

This is horrific, so this is certainly not the time to point out that most likely he would have been burned, historically speaking.

Okay, this is hilarious. Also, Mercutio’s “I do not look for a fight, I let a fight have a chance to look at me” is something Mercutio would definitely say.

It’s Vitruvio, and so far I’m not liking this unholy mélange of AU and canon.

And of course Romeo is the one to decide to go even though it was Benvolio’s idea in canon. But at least this Romeo acknowledges the possibility of his love fading.

So now grandma Montague, who is a bit of a villain here, has goaded Romeo to seduce Rosaline out of revenge.

Sure, we only nodded while my cousin and Juliet were calling each other sun, saint, angel, god of idolatry, and fucking falcons, but it was so much better, I swear!!!

From saint to sun to nyas to flower, eh? Shakespeare!Romeo would be slapping this one silly and asking him who the fuck is Paris.

Aaaaaand this is your daily reminder that Romeo is literally the least violent when he is with Juliet than at any moment. He only killed Tybalt out of revenge for Mercutio and killed Paris only because he was about to take him to the Prince. There is going to be some contrived explanation to this, isn’t there? [Edit: Yep. Apparently R&J’s love is the result of Mercutio’s curse after losing Tomasso. Kill this with fire.]

[stella-monstrum]

“Autopsy of Jane Doe”[ IFC MIDNIGHT, 2016] [Rated R]

(Review & My Parallel Film Theory)

(NSFW CONTENT AND POTENTIAL SPOILERS)

(Written by Stella, edited by Jacob J.)

No matter the genre, the independent film industry holds many hidden gems within it. Studio IFC has been in the game for close to twenty years now, but it wasn’t until 2010 that it unveiled its plans for their “Midnight” collection and genre.

“Many of our most successful VOD titles are those that might fall under the Midnight label – not just films that are straight up horror, erotic arthouse, or genre films, but also ones that shock audiences, push boundaries, and stir up controversy – so officially creating IFC Midnight was the logical next step,” President of IFC Entertainment Jonathan Sehring in a statement. (SOURCE: indiewire.com // HERE)

But the focus in this article will be solely on the horror genre, specifically the 2016 supernatural/horror/thriller standout The Autopsy of Jane Doe. My review, thoughts, and analysis will include some changes I would have made to change the story itself.�� Now, full disclaimer, my changes and reimagining will not affect my rating on the film overall, per se.

-------------------------------------------------

[REVIEW]

One thing that was honestly a surprise (albeit a pleasant one) was how small the cast actually was. Whilst there are ten actors and actresses listed on the IMDb page, the film focuses on only five of them, eventually whittling the action down to three. My honest thought? “With such a small amount of people only being focused on, this will get boring quickly.” But boy, I was 100% wrong in that assumption. If ANYTHING, it only intensified every moment on, Add in dramatic references, film scoring, and film aesthetics? It was just icing on the creep cake.

---------------

Let’s begin with the cast and breakdown of the story:

Brian Cox and Emile Hersch as father-son coroner duo Tommy and Austin Tilden

Ophelia Lovibond as Emma, Austin’s girlfriend

Olwen Kelly as Jane Doe

Michael McElhatton as Sheriff Burke (an albeit brief focus)

Left to right: Austin, Emma and Tommy (Screencap, Autopsy of Jane Doe, 2016)

~~~~~~

From the beginning of the film, you are immediately immersed within a brutal crime scene. It seems fairly straightforward in what appears to be a triple homicide. I was taken by (delighted) surprise that it kicked off at such a fast pace, so much so that I physically felt that I’d lost my footing (while sitting). But as the police and forensic team further search the home for evidence, they wind up finding a pristinely preserved and very nude corpse, one only partially covered in dirt down in the basement. This new revelation doesn’t fit what they’ve pinned down to be a homicide.

Enter a quieter and uneventful small town setting. Here we are introduced to Austin and Tommy Tilden, running a very small coroner business out of the basement of their home (blasting rock and roll from the radio whilst they do their job—a very cool touch.) Austin comes off as a young adult who doesn’t want to be stuck in this small town, let alone in this profession. He feels bad since father Tommy is otherwise alone and widowed. 

The Tilden home/business (Screencap, Autopsy of Jane Doe, 2016)

~~~~

Austin’s girlfriend Emma comes in to pick him up after his shift for a date they had planned. (This part plays into my reimagining later.) Emma sneaks up to scare Austin, then begs and pleads with him to let her see a dead body and what they do for a living. Austin flat out refuses, but then his dad allows Emma to pick one to view. Tommy also explains that they keep bells around the ankles of some corpses (a practice with origins in an old wives’ tale: if the person isn’t dead, the bell will jingle). Austin gets back at Emma by ringing the bell on one of the bodies to scare her, and she threatens that he “won’t be getting laid.” (Emma comes off as a very strong type—and not in a flattering chemistry way)

Just as they’re about to leave for their date, Sheriff Burke comes in with an urgent request: they have 24hrs to perform the autopsy of the Jane Doe found in the opening scene. Austin decides that, with the urgency and his guilt, to stay behind and assist, asking Emma to come back later.

As they perform what they thought would be just another autopsy to find clues as to how or why Jane Doe met her end, things get very eerie and strange. These events elicit goosebumps: from a shift in music to a creepily upbeat version of the McGuire Sisters’ 1954 song “Let the Sunshine In,” to an awful storm coming in seemingly out of nowhere, knocking a tree into the cellar exit, trapping the Tildens inside. The family cat gets killed. The bodies in the morgue awaken. The power goes out. These usually run-of-the-mill supernatural tropes are 100 times more dramatic with the focus only on the two men.

While they examine Jane layer by layer, her fingerprints are nowhere to be found in their system, and her trauma and, injuries in total, do not seem to match up with the crime.

Peat soil from “up northeast” found under her fingernails

No outward visible signs of marking or bruising

Broken wrists and ankles

Ripped out tongue

Mutilated genitalia

Missing tooth (which was force fed to her in a cloth with a ritualistic sigil in it)

Flower with paralyzing properties (and not native to the area) in her stomach

Horribly burned lungs and internal organs covered in scar tissue. 

A very much active brain

Roman numerals and symbols carved into her skin

Markings on the cloth alluding to Leviticus 20:27 (which condemns witches) and the year 1693 (a reference to the Salem Witch Trials)

Austin and Tommy do not come out of this unscathed—or alive, for that matter. While trying to escape in the elevator when being chased by one of the belled-up corpses, Tommy hacks away at it in the dark. But, once the power comes back on, it is revealed to be Emma. Tommy gets attacked by unseen forces (since he is the one primarily performing the exam). They finally reveal that Jane Doe was likely thought to be a witch during the Trials, but the people who performed the ritual were horribly wrong—and ended up turning her into the very thing they sought to destroy. Tommy pleads with the witch to take him as long as she leaves Austin alone, and all of her horrific injuries get transferred to the elder Tilden, leaving Austin to put his father out of misery. Austin, however, gets spooked by a hallucination (provided by Jane) of his dead father on the stairs leading up to the exit. He falls and snaps his neck.

The next day, Jane Doe is in pristine form on the exam table. The Sheriff cannot understand what could have happened since he’d known the Tilden’s for so long, and decides to send Jane off to the next county. The ending features Jane being transferred into the van, a creepily upbeat song playing once again.

All in all, if I were nitpicking, the only real complaint I’d have is that some of the suspenseful moments were drawn out a few seconds too long. On top of that, they shouldn’t have killed off the family cat, Stanley. That said, if you’re into supernatural thrillers or just looking for a film for date night, this would certainly be one to consider. 

(7/10 stabs)  🔪 🔪 🔪 🔪 🔪 🔪 🔪

(Reimagining AHEAD)

▬▬ι══════════════ι▬▬

Now after watching the film, I got to thinking. This is my reimagining of sorts, and a theory that they could have used to cash in on a continuation:

Let us rewind a little bit. Remember Emma? Think back to this scene specifically: 

(I do NOT own the rights to this clip, simply sharing for viewing to set the scene)

༺═──────────────═༻

In this parallel theory there are a few points of change that come to mind initially:

1. Tommy has a more stubborn personality, absolutely and flat out refusing to let Emma see the cadavers

As he (Tommy) shoos Emma out, that is when the Sheriff urgently brings in Jane Doe. Austin convinces his father to let Emma stick around. Tommy then has the attitude of, “If she wants to see a dead body we’ll let her see the entire process.”

Jane’s body gets taken into the Tilden’s business. (Screencap, Autopsy of Jane Doe, 2016)

Whilst the Tilden’s are performing the examination, Emma begins to get bored (before shit gets weird and they essentially awaken Jane’s warnings)

2. When things slowly proceed to get horrific, the further that they get into things, Emma touches the ritual cloth that was used to force-feed Jane her molar, then Austin scolds her for touching evidence.

Progressively after touching the ritual cloth, Emma begins to get very sick. This not only adds an anxiety-inducing level of conflict on top of having to deal with Jane Doe’s unfolding evil, but also provides a deeper layer to the film.

Austin and Tommy examine the ritual cloth. (Screencap, Autopsy of Jane Doe, 2016)

The more that they poke, prod, and try to fight Jane, the worse Emma’s condition gets. Austin has to drag her along whilst also trying to protect his father from the witch’s attacks.

3. You get to the point of looming dread when it becomes clear that Austin cannot save his father, and seemingly Emma as well. (Also fuck it that the cat stays alive and alerts Austin of danger, cause why not?)

After Tommy begs Austin to kill him once all of Jane’s injuries transfer to the elder Tilden (VIEW HERE); Emma’s eyes become clouded like Jane’s.

While Austin tries everything that he can to keep Emma comfortable, he tries to perform a ritual himself to destroy the evil brought in. 

4. For Austin’s final attempt, he burns Jane in the incinerator. 

Jane Doe is far from done causing harm and suffering. When she is burned, Emma takes her place. Seemingly, her magic makes the sheriff believe that Emma was the one that was brought in.

Tommy’s death is made look like a suicide.

Since the Tildens only had 24 hours to solve this case, the Sheriff understands that Austin couldn’t get the job done due to the loss of his father. But rules are rules, and he’s forced to transfer Jane Doe’s (now Emma’s) cadaver to the next county. 

While she’s being taken out and Austin is being asked protocol police questions, the eerie song plays on the radio.

5. Austin knows that he has to hunt Emma’s cursed body into the next county. (And takes the cat with him, because the cat didn’t need to die.)

■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■

Who would LOVE to see a sequel like this?!

[destielfanfic]

Group Ask #183

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Also, please check out our Tags Page and see if the fic in question could be found under some plot/ trope/ pairing related tags! And big thanks to all followers who do check out the tags before sending in the ask!!! <333

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Ask #1 ( @canismajor3 ): there’s this fic…#1

hiya, hope ur doing okay in lockdown! ive looked everywhere and cannot find this fic, it’s an au and begins with dean fairly isolated (i think it’s a farm?) but he lives on his own and he finds cas out in a storm, he’s very sick and dean nurses him back to health, somewhere along this line cas begins to look after a lamb that deans gives him, it was really good and fairly long defo above 5000 words, thank you for ur help, i created this account just to ask :D

Ask #2  ( @casuallyfangirling31): there’s this fic…#2

Hey, I'm looking for a specific Destiel fic. It's set during season 6. It's about Dean praying to Cas, and just letting the emotions out after watching a documentary about the civil war, which in the fic is a secret interest of his. After that, Cas comes down and Dean helps to dress his wounds, and tells him a bit about the documentary he saw. The documentary mentioned something about soldiers writing letters that weren't exactly PG back home to their wives. Idk the name or the author. Help?

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #season 6

Ask #3 ( @givemethebooks): there’s this fic…#3

I'm trying to find a story that centers around either Sam and Gabriel's wedding, or Sam and Eileen's. I can't remember which pair is getting married. But since Dean and Cas, who are in a relationship, are always leaving gatherings early, all their friends say that they won't be able to make it through the entire wedding and reception. Various bets are placed as to when during the reception they'll leave, and they end up teaming with Jess to try and rig the betting.

Ask #4 ( @melon-balls17): there’s this fic…#4

Hi I'm looking for a fic, I've read it before but can't remember the name. It's where Dean is a prince/knight. He goes up the mountain to defeat the beast or something and the wind carries him up most of the way. Castiel lives at the top of the mountain in a bungalow like house and is a god or something, his mother is the goddess of beauty, at the end dean defeats her and becomes the god of beauty, and Castiel's mother is cursed to live as a hag on earth until she dies. Any help would be great!!

Found by @educatedinyellow and @fluffysnarkyalpaca!

Lovers in the Dark by jhoom [NC-17, 42,300 word count] Prince Dean is the most beautiful omega anyone’s laid eyes on. Flowers bloom for the chance to see him, animals climb into his room simply to be in his presence, and not a person in the kingdom can say enough for his beauty. He is universally praised for his lovely green eyes, his freckles, his plush lips and the subtly strong lines of his cheekbones. His family hopes to use that to find a good match and secure an alliance for their kingdom.The gods have other plans. Naomi, goddess of beauty, hears more and more tales of the young omega’s beauty and she hates him for it. The fact that mortals and nature alike would hold anyone’s beauty above her own is intolerable. So she sends her son Castiel, god of love, to infect Dean with an undying love for a monstrous person as punishment for his hubris. Fate has plans of its own…[A retelling of the Classical myth “Cupid and Psyche.” Castiel is cast as Cupid, Dean as Psyche, and Naomi as Venus.]

Ask #5 ( @mattiecat ): there’s this fic…#5

Before I joined AO3, I began this fic: it starts as a human AU, where Dean finds a nude raped Cas in his backyard. Cas has amnesia. However, it takes a twist when Crowley shows up. It was WIP then.

Ask #6 ( @browngirlwithdimples): there’s this fic…#6

Hi do you know a destiel fanfic where cas was a new kid at highschool and Dean was a popular rugby player? Cas is a footballer in the fic

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #High School, #athlete!cas, #athlete!dean

Ask #7 ( @atarnishedcompass ): there’s this fic…#7

Hi! I love your page, and I was hoping if you could help me find a fix that I’ve scored AO3 and Google for. It’s one where Castiel and Dean are college roommates, Castiel is asexual but while studying sees Dean putting a pen in his mouth and realizes he wants him. Then he has a crisis of identity with Charlie who tells him it’s okay that’s demisexual and that labels change. I think Kevin is also ace but I could be wrong. I think rimming is involved, with Cas trying it for the first time

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #College

Found by @theactualpiemaker!

For Science by shiphitsthefan [NC-17, 6,000 word count] “Think of it like an experiment," says Dean. "You’re testing a hypothesis as to whether or not a desirable response can be achieved through the stimulation of the anus via the application of a willing volunteer’s muscular hydrostat.”Cas raises an eyebrow. “Are you actually trying to use the scientific method to talk me into letting you lick my asshole?”

Ask #8 ( @justjennyj ): there’s this fic…#8

I'm looking for a story in which Jessica is Dean and Cas's surrogate, but a bad accident causes Cas, Jess, and the baby's death. Dean takes off, leaving Sam to deal alone. When he returns, he has a daughter with someone else and eventually has son that he names Castiel. I've spent a lot of time looking for this fic. Please help. Thanks.

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #tragedy (fics with MCD)

Important Note - these are all lost fic asks we currently have in our Inbox. If you don’t see your ask here or on previous Group Asks, and if you haven’t received private answer from us, please resend the ask! Recently we discovered that if we include links in our answer, there’s a good chance that it will not reach the OP. A lot of our answers have gone missing and we were only able to find it out thanks to contacting our followers directly via DM.