#WTF DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO WAIT A WEEK??!?!?!? THAT HAPPENED AND I HAVE TO WAIT A WEEK?!??!

[stars-irises]

Hey so, what the actual fuck

[kalims]

he's a ten but he...

premise. sometimes certain bad habits of theirs make their overall rating just a tad bit lower—besides the fact that they keep doing it.

characters. dorm leaders

content. gender neutral reader

malleus (doesn't have a sense of space)

"look beastie, that flower is a native of ours,"

"I agree mal, but I didn't think you taking up the entirety of my seat will make me see it better,"

he blinks, then shrugs.

like i said, has NO sense of space.

if an average person would make an excuse to constantly be in physical contact with who they admire, then malleus is the complete opposite. well, not entirely but he doesn't even bother to construct an explanation as to why he's literally sat over your seat when you coincidentally get put in a table together.

if you start questioning him about it the most you'll get in a very outright 'because he wanted to.' it's not even one of those sarcastic replies he's 100% serious!

cause he believes there's no use in lying about things to be honest.. to further emphasize that, if he ever acts like he does hold fondness for you that surpasses the platonic meter but doesn't mention it he probably hasn't realized yet.

if he did he'd already walk over and bluntly tell you about it.

(I wish I could be that unbothered.)

lilia thinks it's the cutest thing though. you swear you see flashes of light for a split second from the ceiling but when you look up there's only a suspicious swinging chandelier.

^ totally has his own album full of pictures.

if malleus ever discovers it he won't even be disturbed, probably would ask for a copy 💯

since human lives, and their bodies are so fragile he'd taken it upon himself to protect you from harm. even if it means trailing behind you everywhere way too close for comfort, or standing a bees wing away.

while he is respectful most of the time, he's encouraged if you don't comment. if anything, he seems pleased you dont seem to be bothered! (and it'll get harder to tell him to stop when he's so happy the more you let it happen..)

"child of man, have you slept?"

*starts leaning his body forward, to squint at your eyes.* practically right in front of your face.

"WTF."

not even a warning or anything! but atleast he's concerned?

idia (won't even show up for anything and insists a 'virtual' date is better.')

user: where tf r u??

ghoul666: WDYM? at the dorm?

user: IVE BEEN WAITING HERE FOR 20 MINUTES

unintentionally stood you up 💀

you literally have to tell him that you're waiting for him to arrive at the specified area you discussed where your date would take place but would end up vastly irritated when he questions if you guys even did.

ghoul666: we do??

user: I'm taking my minecraft bed away from urs.

ghoul666: NO PLS

ghoul666: HELLO????

next time you log in minecraft it's probably because he begged you to play, you WILL end up seeing some kind of structure that probably took days to make. that's not even the entire thing cause the inside is entirely decorated to your taste.

in short: he constructed some kind of venue for a wedding.. even changed his skin to wear a tuxedo 😭

though he has sparked your pettiness, hence the ignoring him period. even you have got to admit that it's freaking adorable...

big sign, emphasis on please: Im sorry pls put ur minecraft bed back I can't sleep w/o u and I have to wait entire days for it to turn into morning :(

with what he's built you're sure it's 65% true.

if you do end up forgiving him, few weeks later attempting to schedule another date will only end up in naught.

ghoul666: can we not go there

user: 😐

user: you are testing my patience love

ghoul666: 😓 (he is screeching about the term of endearment part btw KABSJAJSAJA ortho would enter his room very concerned.)

ghoul666: how abt

ghoul666: mimic together? call

user: sighs

user: I'm only agreeing cause I want to spend time with you

queue more screeching from his end that you're completely oblivious to.

the only screeching you're gonna hear though is when you guys do get into call as you play, and it's mainly out of terror when his soul gets sent to the void ascending when the entity pops out of a corner and starts chasing him.

"I GOT THIS. ILL CARRY U THIS IS FINE" *screams again* but really wants to impress you so he pushes through.

unsurprisingly does carry you.

asks to match avatars right after (idia love languange)

vil (frets over you way too much.)

"vil, did you see the chocolate in the freezer?"

"oh, that? I noticed that you've already gone through the ideal number of bars this week so I took it upon myself to make sure you don't go sick on me,"

"I love you but please give it back—"

"I love you too, and no."

disclaimer: he does this for your own good 😜 (average mom excuse.)

looks out for you more than he does for his own dorm residents. everyone is wondering where he ran off to after class, especially since he's the one that scheduled the pomefiore meeting every fridays!

and to think he was the one getting irritated over the more newer first years for being late..

*shows up literally half an hour in*

why you ask? you simply shouldn't have texted him about abandoning your daily walk together through the gardens in favor of catching sleep since you called in sick (you're suspicious if crewel really did go in to check for proof, and not concern.)

vil's really feeling the absolute regret of not checking his phone during classes.. well, he only saw the message which was coincidentally sent like somehow ONE minute after the lecture started and he's only seeing it 59 minutes later.

oh you poor thing!! though the lunch break is short, he has about 5 minutes for a trip to the mirror chamber..

you'd think the 'seen' icon below your message was a weird omen for something you're not sure but it must be doom cause vil is right at the front porch of your crappy dorm. at his own expense?! looking more disheveled than you've seen him before.

if a few stray hairs was disheveled at all. more importantly, he still looked drop dead gorgeous!

you probably looked quite terrible with the blanket draped around your shoulders looking like you just crawled out of your grave, because he looked absolutely mortified at your state.

"oh great sevens.." he looked like he was faint, huffing and fanning himself with his hand. "look at you, why didn't you tell me sooner, darling?"

you blink, swallowing to make your throat less dry but your voice still comes out raspy. "I did, like an hour ago—" without your invitation whatsoever, he steps in. promptly shutting the door behind him (which surprisingly still stands sturdy.)

vil takes a hold of your shoulders before reaching his hands upwards to tilt your face around. "you should have sent earlier," he says. you keep in the comment that you were sleeping during it, and you told him about it during second period so.. "your face is so pale."

you sigh.

"yeah, I just saw. I know, I look hideous right now."

vil frowns at you, stopping to angle your face at him. "don't ever say that. I always find you beautiful even if you are.." he glances at you from face to toe, then back up. "sickly."

"... I feel offended."

"hmph, shush now. let me draw you a bath then I know something that will boost your system."

after much coaxing in his end, you reluctantly take a warm bath in the hopefully hygienic bathroom. true to his word, vil did... concoct something. though it looked pretty the random steam that flew from it was really suspicious.

the residents don't dare to question, except rook of course. who already knew what transpired! :)

epel: 😃 (atleast vil wasn't around.)

"roi du poison~ tell me, tell me! is the trickster well? have you cured them with your love?"

"rook, you have 5 seconds to get out of my face."

rook giggles away.

kalim (thinks money will buy anything, including your forgiveness.)

"here!" there's a suspiciously bright smile on his face as he hands you.. some keys?

you deadpan, jingling it in your hands. it weighs heavy than the average, probably because of the fact that it's literally made of gold. "... kalim what is this?" you emit a sigh, from suspicion and concern.

"a gift!"

"wait why does it say lot 111--"

as you can already, that was an actual, literal house. which you imagine would probably be a lots more grand, and new compared to your old baby ramshackle.

but you do love it despite it's love for falling apart at the most inconvenient of times..

fighting with kalim was rare but it was hard to even argue with him because the notion of disagreements are so bizarre to him that he unintentionally doesn't treat you seriously with your concerns, accidentally downplaying them aaaand now you're upset.

after the ranting to jamil about how you must be busy with a lot, since you haven't even talked to him in the past 2 days. all it took was a side glance to his friend in denial and jamil immediately knew.

"what do you mean they're mad!? D:"

"just.. go apologize, I don't want to get caught up in this."

if his definition of an apology is buying you an entire house...

( ^ it is btw.)

kalim really doesn't mean any harm. he just really wants to sate whatever anger you held for him <- maybe he's overthinking it but it's kalim so he's 99% sure it's his fault! even though it hasn't even been confirmed from your end he'd probably accept it whole heartedly.

he wanted you to talk to him again so badly that he wouldn’t mind showering you with houses... since your living situation doesn't live up to your kindness (sorry ramshackle love u xx)

you know what. he wouldn't even notice he's the reason you're upset at first even though he's been asking around on who put you in that mood. despite himself being the perpetrator but he didn't really know that did he?

the only reason he does is because he assumed you were just because you avoided him like some sort of.. cockroach! (he dislikes those.) and he couldn't take it anymore.

was probably 1 sec away from barging into your dorm which wouldn't take a lot of effort since one ram to the door would probably break it.

bless jamil for jailing all the carpets so kalim doesn't find them.

even if said carpets fling him off when he's riding them.

"kalim, why would you buy a literal house... and you also got a rare address paid--"

"for them! ;D"

"... you do know they'd be more offended by the fact that you'd try to replace that.., ahem. dorm, right?"

"oh... should I buy them a vehicle then?"

you only promise to forgive him once he takes back the keys, and the house entirely...

(grim begged you to keep it, 'house for him apparently.')

azul (keeps trying to offer you discounts thinking it's a good excuse to have you over.)

"I assure you. you'll find no deal better than this."

"I'm not even that hungry for sea food, actually I'm craving some--"

"you're in luck then! ahem, it's 26% off due to a special event for today."

pro tip: keep insisting to eat at other places cause he's gonna keep increasing the discount by 2% until you eventually relent. once, you made him go to the point of 75% off, it's almost hilarious if not for the fact it only worked once.

now he won't go last 50!

ahem. if you look closely you can almost spot tiny cracks accumulating with each denial you respond with, and each increase of his discount. he's grown to be wary about the bullshit 'lucky' promos you just happen to stumble on.

last time you did he practically lost a week's worth of the presumed income he's predicted cause you actually went around and told your first year friends about it... who.. in turn told some, other friends of theirs about it and you could guess.

love must hurt.. and unfortunately it's his wallet wailing.

but azul is not so easily swayed by this! for you have swayed him first! *wink wonk*

but azul has another trick up his sleeve... keeping on roping jade and floyd into it; whom are far too enthusiastic cause finally— something fun to do! someone to bother! not only have you got the most stubborn octopus having frequent suspicious 'deals' but here are his equally suspicious lackeys.

who keeps.. talking about fried octopus..

yeah, you're not sure if preaching about azul’s species is the job they were assigned.

they're fairly easy to point in the right direction anyways. the tweels have always associated you with the word 'fun' so just a little, friendly suggestion from and they were off to their merry way. mortifying every single person you come across with their sudden attachment.

one of their tricks? following you around. and just somehow, every single place you enter is just mysteriously full even though you peered inside and there was like 7 tables empty. what are they hosting? ghosts? spirits?

...

they do look like they've seen some though..

jade rn: "a shame indeed, you must be hungry. why don't we escort you back to monstro lounge?" :)

long story short you can't even reply cause the sleek eel is already guiding you around by the use of his hands on your shoulders. just to make sure you don't stray away from the destination, he says.

"didn't you say that yesterday's promo was like, a one day thing?" you quirk a brow, and you almost fool yourself into thinking he flinched.

azul clears his throat. "well—today is.. the month before you've graced octavinelle with your assistance—"

he praises himself for his quick thinking.

COME ON! it doesn't matter if you're sick of eating stir fried shrimp, or the butter one, or every single dish they serve that includes shrimp! (also do not mention that you ate somewhere else before you just decide to visit his dorm because that establishment just mysteriously got filed a non-legal business report.)

then you've got floyd chasing you around with a fork. which is more terrifying because he's holding it in a notion that would seem like he'd just stab down at you when he catches up with your little goose chase.

it's just.. you're not sure if your stomach could take another bite of the poor food he stabbed into, and is now chasing you around with.

you screech. "JADE PLEASE."

the man shrugs. "it's a free taste."

"AZUL."

"... only on a condition of course."

frankly. it took all the balls he had to actually sputter out the most simplest sentence ever, cause during the time he rehearsed that in front of his mirror it just plagued him with embarrassment but he's getting desperate.

'I'd like to take you out to dinner, somewhere else of course.'

actually, maybe obliterating any possible craving for the food of his lounge just might've been part of his plans to ask you out..?

leona (prevents you from actually being productive via dragging you down to 'nap' every. single. time.)

"I will literally fail if you don't let go of me right now."

"hmph. so what? it's not like failing a grade killed anyone."

"leona just because you've lived through a lot of fails doesn't mean I have to, we're not all rich enough to not finish school."

to which he'd retaliate that all you'd need is to marry him and you'd be set for life.

there is no winning an argument with leona when it comes to his naps. if he states that you're to be next to him as he sleeps, its final. no buts, no retaliations, cause apparently they're all invalid according to him even if you drag him to court.

rhetorically of course, that if its a comical court scene his only statements are; 'well you're wrong', 'who cares', and 'i dont care'. one way or another he's still gonna win you over and now you're fit snugly in his arms, lamenting.

and if crowley chastises you for not doing the errands (via leona's common interference.) the only thing you need to honestly do is to complain to leona about it and suddenly crowley has the kindness to forgive you for your 'laziness' then says something about enjoying your time together?

leona's work no doubt.

you suppose he does has its perks. even if most of it isn't exactly ideal.

if you're being smart then you should give him an ultimatum or something, or bribe him. but... that really has no guarantee to work either cause you're ending up defeated, or just defeated and flustered since he's somehow unconsciously flirty.

at the end of the day you can't really hate him cause the following day you find out he sent an already sleep deprived ruggie to do your work. 'so you can shut your fussing up and let me enjoy you.' he says, and you quote.

it goes something like;

"if i finish my work i'll stick by you all day."

a stready flow of confidence keeps your voice firm as you glower down at the blank-faced leona sat on the grass. he merely tilts his head, raising a brow at you and seemingly pondering from the way his eyes fly to the sky.

you'd think that maybe your plan actually worked but he merely grunts and flops backwards, holding the back of his head with his palms as he laid. and! he ignores you.

...this little greedy man... "why should i care whether or not you finish your work?" he huffs, like the evil, arrogant spawn he is but you can't really defend yourself cause said evil spawn bewitched you so much that you actually still like him.

"because you care about me?"

"...fine," he scowls, releasing a breath you'd mistake for irritation. "then, do you really think i need you to finish your work when i can just keep you right here?"

you sulk. "i'll do anything you want?"

he deadpans as if you said something stupid. "i don't need you to anything else but sit still and be pretty."

...

...

see what i mean about him eventually winning you over? yeah.

next morning there's a rebellion in savanaclaw about overworked residents and ruggie is the head of them.

"he said that he doesn't need you today." <- ruggie, steering you away.

"really?" <- you, confused

riddle (overthinks TOO HARD.)

“I'm just a little busy.”

“I understand,” riddle says.

“I'm just a little busy.” he understands.

“a little busy.” its just… a small thought…

“I'm just busy.” his mind is a hazard at this point. 

for someone as supposedly maintained as riddle—you'd think his mind is as composed as it is organized. like the pens you'd perfectly align in correlation to order of colors, or the neat pile of clothing folded neatly, tucked in some corner in your closet that is farther in since it's used less.

that's just how he is, or at least seems to be. a bundle of organized thoughts, every thought connected to another. a mind too clean to be going on haywire (when he isn't in a particular mood, that is.)

you're just busy. he thinks. you said it yourself, with that agonizingly nice smile that must be sprinkled with some kind of spell from the way it just eradicated all the protests in his throat upon sight. he isn't one to question it, he wants to help but not if you don't ask.

he can only stare with resigned acceptance at your insomnia induced eyes.

but when the curtain of darkness befalls night raven college, even in the comfort of heartslabyul is he still thinking about that thought–and he can’t help but wonder; why exactly are you busy? its not that he’s suddenly hyper aware of your lack of presence since you’ve been attached to the hip the previous week and now you’re just.

…busy…

riddle likes to think of himself as a level-headed, private person. like the boy he raised himself to be and therefore proud of. but its way past 10AM. which is usually the time he sleeps, and let me tell you that he’s never once broke the cycle for years. yet here he is, a frown of frustration present on his face as he wills his mind to sleep.

somehow closing his eyes felt forced, he immediately snapped them open once his mind decides to conjure an image of you even in the darkness his lids offers.

“THIS IS ABSURD.”

and the yell promptly woke up the entire dorm from the ferocity of his scream. (and of course gave them the flashback of their year.)

that night was one of the worst he’s ever had because he woke up with red rimmed eyes and a pounding headache that ensured his bad mood the rest of the day.

everyone noted to steer clear.

and he unknowingly steered clear of yours since you were ‘busy.’

“why are you sulking?” a voice queried, spoken as though they were eating something as they asked. a reprimand rises in his throat, but it all just dies down once his sharp eyes settle on you, slipping into the seat in front of him then raising a brow and the traces of irritation practically evaporates from his eyes.

he feels the need to cough–so he does. “i’m– i’m not.” he clears his throat, avoiding your eyes but still sneaking in glances, something he notes is that you’re still looking everytime he does. (and boring an unimpressed face because he knows you don’t believe him at all.)

guilt rises in his mind, because he feels a slither of annoyance and its the presence of pettiness that bothers him. riddle knows you’re not at fault, just his mind at convincing that you just somehow decided in the span of a day that you might not like him anymore–so he can’t help the bite. 

“why are you here?” a glance not intended to look mean.

“i thought you were busy.” he adds.

your brows raise, he spots your teeth holding your lips back from showing your grin and he feels warm. “what?” he hisses defensively, despite you not even having replied to him yet.

he leans backwards, straightening up in his seat when your chin leans forward, resting on your intertwined fingers. you flash him a smile. 

“mr. rosehearts, are you perhaps… sulking because i’m busy?”

“no!”

silence.

“no.” he repeats, weaker.

“well,” you continue, beaming. “i heard from ace that you were awake the entire night, and that you kept him awake too. are you alright?” 

he sputters. “it wasn’t because of you!”

you snort. “i didn’t even say anything about me.”

so you incline to following riddle around, poking fun at him and still trailing after the seemingly enraged red head because despite his angry protests, demanding you to go away because you’re annoying he keeps glancing back to see if you’ll follow,

so cute…….

[slutforguns]

Josh is my son so you think you could do a teen version with fem reader where the guys ACTUALLY go to their prom (I guess senior prom???) and since they probably won’t have dates reader can like ask him to dance with them or something? THANK!

Wait this is actually cute wtf

Gonna put it in hc format, hope that's ok 😞💞

Tw for a single mention of vomit in Jerry's part "He'd be so nervous to the point where he's trying not to throw up"

Bonerapetit ↓↓↓

Bill dickey:

Since Bill has probably been crushing on you for a little while, you asking him would probably have him blushing.

He'd probably accept by saying something like "pfft, fine whatever" or "I'll do it because I know you don't have a date" (as if he already had one when he obviously didn't)

Would probably be ok at dancing

Would step on your feet a bit, probably would be off beat but it's fine

He also wouldn't be able to look you in the eye the entire time. He'd just be nervously looking to the side with a scowl.

Would be rlly sweaty (I mean all of them would but still)

After he'd act like nothing happened and that he was just being nice bc you so desperately needed it, but in reality he's freaking out

Josh Levy:

He would be so shocked

Like actually

But he would accept

He would be shit at dancing I'm so sorry

He'd be stumbling and stepping on your feet and just act like nothing happened while his face burned with embarrassment

Would be so sweaty to the point there's literally pit stains on his suit

Afterwards he'd just not talk to you for a week

He appreciated the dance he's just extremely embarrassed

Pete DiNunzio:

Wouldn't hesitate to accept

Would literally jump at the opportunity to dance with you

He would be like Bill where he's just ok at dancing

Not bad, not great, just ok

Would be rlly handsy

Like REALLY handsy

He'd constantly move his hands to your hip and ass, and if you have anything up there, your chest

Afterwards he'd probably act like your boyfriend (even if you didn't ask him out and danced with him purely out of pity)

Jerry Stokes:

He'd be so nervous

He would accept ofc (bc he's a people pleasure) but he'd look like a frightened puppy

He'd be so nervous to the point where he's trying not to throw up

He'd be stepping on your feet, almost falling over, and all and all being a nervous wreck

He'd be looking everywhere but you

Doesn't say anything out of fear of saying something stupid

He'd have to go straight to the bathroom to wash his face with cold water so he can chill the fuck out

(give him a little kiss to make him feel better)

[sleepyjuice]

patience is a virtue - jj maybank

Summary: you finally get on birth control, which means you and jj finally get to raw dog it, whoop

Warnings: 18+!!!!!!!! SMUT, p in v sex (reader is on birth control but theoretically both parties are tested and clean and exclusively sleeping with each other), little bit of praise kink, cream pie, fluff? soft jj <3

wc: 2771 wtf 🫣

A/N: so I decided to start writing again and then this happened lol. I’m probably rusty and this is my first time writing for jj so I hope it’s okay and y’all enjoy!!!<3

Jj had been counting down the days until your doctor's appointment. You were finally getting on birth control, the arm implant, to be specific. You had done your research, as well as an initial consultation with your doctor to go over all of your options and decided that the ‘one and done’ route would be the best for you.

You and jj had been together for a little over a year, using condoms every time you had sex. As much as you both liked the security of you not getting pregnant, you both wanted more, you both craved more. Not only that, but you had irregular and horribly painful periods and when your doctor mentioned that being on birth control could stop your periods, that was more than enough to convince you to take that step.

The day finally came, though, and jj insisted on driving you to your appointment, ignoring your assurance that it was a quick and easy procedure.

“jj, it’s not like I’m getting put under for a major surgery or something, it’ll probably be only like ten minutes. No medicine or anything.” You told him as you buckled your seatbelt. There was no changing his mind.

jj rolled his eyes as he started up the twinkie, already having made arrangements with john b over a week ago to let him borrow the van.

“I know, baby, but this is a big moment, wanna be there for you.” He said with a grin, pulling onto the road and starting towards your doctor’s office.

“Well, I appreciate it. I honestly think you’re more excited than I am.” You giggled, glancing over at your boyfriend as you pulled your hair up into a ponytail.

“Now what makes you say that?” He teased, knowing damn well he had this appointment marked in his phone calendar and his extra ass even drew a dick and a smiley face on your little desk calendar you had.

You had arrived shortly after, and just as you predicted, the whole appointment only took about ten minutes and was pretty painless. jj waited in the car for you to be done, smiling ecstatically at you once he saw you make your way out the office doors and towards the twinkie.

“How was it? Did it hurt?” He asked as soon as you got into the car, looking at your arm that was now wrapped in a bright pink bandage.

You shook your head, leaning across the seat to softly kiss your boyfriend, his hands finding your hair first before slowly trailing down your body to rub on your thighs as he deepened the kiss. You knew exactly what he was trying to do, so you pulled away with a laugh.

“Nope, nope, don’t even think about it. This thing doesn’t start working for seven days.” You told him, smiling innocently at him as you watched his face drop. You swore all the light in his eyes left his body for a second. He was so dramatic.

You were obviously disappointed too. It would have been nice to go straight home and have what would probably be the best sex of your life right away. But then you would have to go and buy a Plan B, and then this would all be for nothing.

“Now what the fuck? How are they gonna call this shit modern medicine but that shit doesn’t start working for a week?” jj scoffed, one of his hands still resting on your thigh while his other raised to softly graze your bandage, “like, they put a whole ass stick in your arm. What’s it even doing for these seven days? Just sitting in there doing nothing? They really need to make advancements to this shit.” he rambled on, but he couldn’t help but start laughing once you did.

“You are the most dramatic person I have ever met. We just gotta wait it out. Although, with all this anticipation, hopefully you can last more than a minute.” You mumbled the last part, your gaze leaving jj’s as you buckled your seatbelt, knowing he would start huffing over your comment.

And that he did, huffing as he started the car, running his fingers through his hair. “That’s — shut the fuck up. Don’t act like this won’t be torture for you, too.” He mumbled back, backing out of the parking lot and heading towards the chateau.

It had been a long week since your appointment. You and jj had never gone this long without having sex. You could have still used a condom in the meantime, but after a conversation in bed the first night, you had both decided to wait until you could do it raw for the first time. You were struggling, to say the least, but you had more composure than jj did all week.

He wasn’t making it easy though. The way he cuddled against you in bed, his hard dick pressing into your lower back made you crave the feeling of him inside of you. You almost caved multiple times every time he touched you, you just wanted more. But he respected your agreement, even though it was just as torturous for him. Touching your skin, seeing the way the bottom of your ass cheeks stuck out of the bottom of your shorts, all he wanted to do was rip your clothes off and bury himself inside of you. But he could wait, it would be worth it.

It couldn’t have been more perfect timing. Day seven had finally come around and your beautiful and wonderful friends all happened to have plans, which meant you and jj had the chateau to yourselves. It truly felt like a gift from god.

It was late morning, the soft glow of the sun peaking through the sheer blinds of the bedroom jj had made his own had woken you from your sleep. jj was still sleeping soundly next to you, his face pressed against your neck, an arm draped firmly across your waist.

“jay,” you whispered, softly rubbing circles on the back of his neck, your face being close enough to leave soft kisses in his messy blonde hair.

“mm- oh, fuck,” jj rasped, quickly gaining consciousness as he realized it was finally morning. He was so excited to sleep last night because it meant the next day would come quicker. It was like a kid on Christmas Eve. “it’s time?” He lifted his head from your neck, rolling himself over so he was on top of you, his hands holding himself up above your head on the pillow.

“It’s time,” you giggled, reaching up to cup his cheeks, “I’m done being patient. Need you inside me.” You whispered, and at that, jj leaned down, connecting your lips. He wasn’t completely rough, but he wasn’t gentle, and god did you miss this.

Your lips didn’t part from one another as his hands moved their way down your body. His fingers fiddled with the hem of his t-shirt that clad your body, yet another thing making him absolutely feral.

You disconnected to breathe, and so that he could lift your shirt above your head, discarding it on the cluttered floor. You looked up at him, now only in your panties, finding that familiar comfort that lived in those beautiful blue eyes of his.

“Fuck, missed seeing you like this, baby.” He panted, his breath hot on your skin as he lowered his mouth down to your tits, his tongue circling your sensitive nipple as you gasped, reaching up to entangle your fingers in his hair.

He soon took your whole nipple in his mouth, humming in satisfaction against the warm skin, while also lowering his body to grind his boxer clad dick against your wet center. He was achingly hard, no doubt his boxers were already stained with the precum that was eagerly leaking out of his sensitive tip.

You whimpered softly as he grazed his teeth against your nipple as he sucked sloppily, the feeling of his mouth on you making your center pulsate harder.

“jj, need you, please..” you whined, grinding your hips up against his dick, the fabric beneath the two of you was too much. You needed him.

“Okay, baby, okay,” he breathed, pulling his mouth off of your nipple with a pop, leaving the skin red and wet, “need to taste you first.” He added before scooting down further on the bed, giving himself enough room to pull his shirt over his head and discard it with yours.

He quickly repositioned himself in front of your legs, his ring clad fingers cold on your skin as he pushed your knees apart, sliding his hands up your thighs as he spread your legs. He was met with your underwear which you could feel was soaked, and you were sure it was quite the sight for him to see.

“Jesus, fuck, you’re soaked.” He hummed, palming his hands up and down your thighs until he reached the waistband of your underwear, his fingers not hesitating to pull the fabric down your legs and off of your body completely.

“There she is,” jj smiled at the sight of your pussy before him, running a finger through your wet folds, circling your entrance and sliding it back up to rub torturously slow circles against your clit. He was acting as though your pussy was his best friend who he hadn’t seen in months. Again, he was dramatic.

“Please, jay, fuck, you — you can’t torture me now, ‘s been way too long.” You whined, your eyes shutting for a moment as you clenched around nothing, his touches making your veins feel like fire. You needed something.

“M’kay, baby, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, just missed this. Don’t like not having you for so long.” He finally gave in, lowering his head to finally take you in his mouth, his tongue flicking quickly against your clit as his wet lips closed around it, sucking the sensitive bud in his warm mouth.

You couldn’t hold back the moans that fell from your lips, the feeling of his mouth finally on you mixed with the soft breaths leaving his nose that was pressed against your pelvic bone was everything.

“That’s right, that’s good, yeah? Just what you needed?” He pulled back for only a moment to glance up at you as you nodded quickly in response before his middle finger teased your wet entrance. Without another word, he pushed his finger inside of you, bringing his mouth back on your clit at the same time as he began pumping his finger inside of your tight pussy, not missing the sweet gasp that left your parted lips.

He got a rhythm going as he always did, eventually adding his index finger, stretching your tight walls around his fingers as his mouth moved sloppily against your clit. It was a wet mess already, his chin and fingers completely soaked with your juices, the sound of your moans and his soft praises filled the room as he quickened his pace, bringing you closer to your high.

“I’m close, fuck me, I’m gonna come-“

It took only a few more pumps from jj, the way he curled his fingers perfectly, not missing a beat as your stomach tightened before contracting, your eyes squeezing shut as you moaned loudly, reaching forward again to grip tightly onto your boyfriends hair, pulling rather hard as your orgasm took over your body.

Your pussy clenched around his fingers as he pulled them out, bringing them up to his lips to lick them clean as he grinned lovingly at you.

“That’s good, baby, you’re so good for me,” he cooed, leaning down once again to press a sweet kiss onto your sensitive clit, making your breath hitch as you came down from your high. “You ready for me now? Been dreaming of this since I met you.” jj studied your face for any sign of hesitation, brushing a loose strand of hair that had fallen by your eyes.

“I’m ready, please, need to feel you.” You responded rather quickly, wholeheartedly enjoying the foreplay, but this is what you had been waiting for, you were ready to feel him fully.

“I got you, I got you…” he gave a quick kiss to your lips before sitting up and removing his boxers. His cock sprung free, happily unrestricted now, his tip red and swollen, precum now leaking out down his shaft.

You watched as he gave himself a few quick pumps, lubricating himself with his precum before positioning his cock in front of your pussy, gathering your wetness onto his tip before lining himself up with your entrance.

One hand held his cock as he slowly pushed himself inside of you, the other holding your bare waist. It was immediate euphoria for the both of you. You both had no idea what utter pleasure had been beneath the thin condom you had grown so accustomed to.

jj paused once he bottomed out, his eyes meeting yours as you nodded profusely for him to keep going. He needed a second, your joke about him not lasting was now fresh on his mind, but he was determined to make this last for the both of you, and he would be damned if he didn’t give you at least one more orgasm.

“Fuck me, Y/N, holy shiiitt you feel so perfect. So perfect for me. Pussy was made for me.” He groaned, taking a deep and shaky breath before he felt like he could begin moving again.

And so he did, his thick cock pushing in and out of you as you desperately reached up to grab the back of his neck, your fingernails digging into the soft skin making his little curses and moans grow louder.

Sex had never felt this good before, no barriers at all, just jj, completely jj. Watching his eyebrows furrow in pure and utter pleasure as his lips parted was sending your stomach into a frenzy and realistically you both knew that this first time going raw wouldn’t last too much longer, but that was okay.

“Love you, love you, feels so good, just— fuck, harder, please, I’m close.” You whined, your pussy clenching around jj’s cock as he quickened his pace, his hand that was holding your waist now moving down to rub at your clit, knowing that was going to do it for you.

“C’mon, baby, let go, yeah? Come for me, fuck — love you so much, so so good..” he praised, his cock hitting your sweet spot so perfectly while his fingers worked tirelessly against your clit, and that was all it took for your orgasm to hit you at full force, showing no mercy as your back arched, your fingers digging even deeper into your boyfriend’s skin. You didn’t even know what words left your mouth as you rode out your high, but you couldn’t care less.

jj’s gaze left your eyes as he looked down at the sight of his cock sliding in and out of your pussy, juices everywhere, no doubt leaving a mess on the sheets. But the sight of that alone, mixed with the euphoria of being inside of you completely raw, not to mention the way your pussy clenched repeatedly around his cock, that was it for him. He pushed in one last time, his tip hitting deep inside of you as he came, truly inside of you for the first time. Thick spurts of come shot into you as he completely lost his composure, his arms unable to hold him up any longer, collapsing against your bare chest.

“My baby, god, fuck, I love you so much, you’re… ahh, fuck.” jj moaned one last time, needing a moment to catch his breath before he could move again. What felt like forever was only a few seconds, however, and he slowly pulled his softening cock out of you, not missing the way you winced at not only the sensitivity but the loss of fullness.

Taking a breath, jj leaned over the side of the bed to grab his t-shirt, gently wiping up his mess that was now spilling out of you. He made a mental note to put a towel down next time, might save a load of laundry, and a shirt.

“You did so good, baby. I’ve never felt so good in my fucking life.” He kissed your swollen lips once he finished wiping you up, smiling tiredly at your sweet post orgasm face, cheeks pink with a small but satisfied little smile on your lips.

“Yeah, no, that was well worth the wait.”

[ladcedes]

two wheels

george russell x biker!reader, social media!au

summary george's new girlfriend seems way too cool for him and the fans just cannot believe it

notes bit of a longer one here (what is a plot) but i just wanted to do something fun since it's the winter break. and i love poking a bit of fun at my favs

yourusername

tagged: yourbestfriend and 6 others

Liked by lilymhe, georgerusselll63, and 29,412 others

yourusername that's my party people! 🍾

10 December 2023

view 116 comments

yourbestfriend for the record, everything that happened after 9pm is completely yn's fault

⤷ yourusername sooo r u still up for next week?

⤷ yourbestfriend @/yourusername 100%

⤷ yourfriend1 yn is the reason why you shouldn't drink and drive 😭

nadissodone HOLDDDDD IT 🚨🚨 george liked this post

⤷ 44formula but he wasn't tagged soo??

⤷ goatmilton what is a polar bear doing in arlington texas 💀💀💀

champagneshower no way 4th slide is george tho

liked by yourusername

⤷ jadedtrack it does kinda look like him tbf

4strobaby yn ma'am could you please confirm whether or not you have a boyfriend

liked by yourusername

⤷ 4strobaby GUYS SHE LIKED THE COMMENT THIS MIGHT MEAN SOMETHING

⤷ unevilincorporated OMG WAIT @/yourusername does that boyfriend happen to be f1 driver george russell???

liked by yourusername and georgerussell63

⤷ unevilincorporated BOTH HER AND GEORGE LIKED THAT ONE???? IT DEFINITELY MEANS SOMETHING

⤷ maroon.jpg @unevilincorporated yall are crazy why are we playing ouija board with comment likes 😭😭

georgerussell63

Liked by pierregasly, yourusername, and 127,384 others

georgerussell63 Pretty good start to winter break ❄️

p.s. thanks danielricciardo for the wine

18 December 2023

view 316 comments

danielricciardo Hope you guys enjoyed the wine!

⤷ yourusername the wine was a banger, will 100% be getting more

⤷ tracklimited @/yourusername oh yeah she basically just confirmed that they're together 💀

oceanblvd im almost positive that's yn's helmet theyre really not trying to hide it anymore

yourusername • 3hrs ago | georgerussell63 • 2hrs ago / 20 December 2023

you replied to georgerussell63's story:

i'm taking u out on another one tmr and u can't say no babe

georgerussell63:

what if i do say no?

you:

u can't. i'll kidnap u and throw u on my bike

georgerussell63:

i could run away

and i think mercedes will have something to say about that

you:

don't worry, i won't keep you for too long

besides, the team loves me

they'll let me off the hook

georgerussell63:

i don't like how i can't argue with that

yourusername

tagged: georgerussell63 and 7 others

Liked by francisca.cgomes and 211,220 others

yourusername i should be playing in the winter snow, but imma be under the mistletoe (with youuu)

25 December 2023

view 213 comments

lilymhe nobody tell her it wasn’t snowing in london last night

⤷ yourusername i wouldn’t have known anyway tbh

⤷ pierregasly @/yourusername too busy?

⤷ georgerussell63 @/pierregasly we can’t disclose that i’m afraid.. the nda and all that 😂😂

⤷ brockenclocks @/pierregasly why is pierre always at the scene of the crime 😭😭

⤷ certifiedlvrgrrl @/georgerussell63 george wtf do u mean by the nda

mercedesamgf1 Merry Christmas from the team!

liked by yourusername

yourusername • 2hrs ago / 28 December 2023

yourusername

tagged: georgerussell63 and 4 others

Liked by lissiemackintosh, georgerussell63, and 52,220 others

yourusername starting the year off in the beautiful south of france 💋

📸 1&2: georgerussell63

4 January 2024

view 224 comments

georgerussell63 i think i should get credits for the 4th pic too since it was taken on my phone

⤷ yourusername georgie please just let it go 😭

⤷ georgerussell63 @ yourusername you took 50 pictures before letting me leave the bathroom and i was only in half of them.

⤷ yourusername @ georgerussell63 they're for ur personal collection 😘

⤷ moonriver @ yourusername PERSONAL COLLECTION????

⤷ sativaur @ yourusername "personal collection" yn im going insane

fonedance yn you're so fine please break up with ur bf i can treat you better than he ever will

⤷ cuntlonso realest thing i've read all day 😭😭😭

georgerussell63

Liked by pierregasly, logansargeant, and 216,993 others

georgerussell63 A refreshing little getaway to start the year

📸 2: yourusername

4 January 2024

view 431 comments

jadedfc the way his arm wraps around her in their pics im sosoo sick

⤷ rollemodel he lowkey shut down all the haters with it too

⤷ sunburnns that should be me pls

yourusername

tagged: georgerussell63

Liked by georgerussell63, lilymhe and 39.238 others

yourusername trying out a couple extra wheels...

16 January 2024

view 146 comments

yourbestfriend coolest girl itw ⚡️

lilymhe so the final verdict on 2 vs 4 wheels is...?

⤷ georgerussell63 4 wins

⤷ yourusername @/georgerussell63 hell no it's obviously 2 🙄

⤷ georgerussell63 @/yourusername think that's because you lost by an entire lap?

⤷ yourusername @/georgerussell63 as if you didn't almost fall off the bike!! u're also biased

⤷ georgerussell63 @/yourusername why don't we just agree to disagree?

⤷ yourusername @/georgerussell63 you just don't wanna admit i'm right

⤷ motogp @/georgerussell63 @/yourusername🍿🍿🍿

⤷ lilymhe @/motogp pass me some, too

⤷ alex_albon @/motogp me 3

gr63stan their arguing is so adorable 😭😭

mercrarri yep i still think she's way too cool for him

⤷ landoshelmet ikr she's such a badass and he's... there

⤷ pastrydish literal she's everything and he's just ken

⤷ 4lbons she already said leave the man alone damn 😭😭

maiadrsh george russell has to be the luckiest man alive

⤷ yourusername more like sexiest man alive

⤷ alex_albon @/yourusername i did NOT need to see you say that today 🤢

⤷ georgerussell63 @alex_albon you'd better believe it 😎

⤷ alex_albon @/georgerussell63 not today, not for a single one of the past 15 years we've known each other, and not ever

⤷ yourusername @alex_albon sincerely, even i doubt that second part

⤷ silverstoned what is yn insinuating in these comments 🤨

an: i feel like every time i post a new smau i level up and introduce new formatting. also comment tags r weird bcs i wna avoid tagging real users and it irks me

bonus:

yourusername • 12hrs ago

seen by georgerussell63, francisca.cgomes, and 153,329 others

georgerussell63 replied to your story | 16:44

"but you love me more"

"right?"

you | 16:45

"hmmmm i gotta think about it"

"i'll tell you tomorrow?"

georgerussell63 | 16:46

"..."

"i can't believe i might lose to a bike 😐"

you | 16:46

"jokes 😭"

"would you pick your car over me, though?"

georgerussell63 | 16:48

"no comment"

you | 16:49

"george."

georgerussell63 | 16:51

"i love you"

you | 16:52

"i'm coming over"

[vibelladonna]

𝓊𝓅𝒹𝒶𝓉𝑒𝓈… 𝒶𝑔𝒶𝒾𝓃 ! ! 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓋𝒾𝓋𝒾

To start off, sorry I haven’t posted any fanfics lately.

Well, other than “Rizz the Wolf” April Fool reaction—look man I was really hyped and I couldn't help myself, I'd like to mention that I’ve got two exams this week and one more after that, so things have been kinda hectic for me as my spring semester is ending soon.

I’ll try to post something this weekend or later.  

Now, about the update on Geo… y’all really blew up my inbox. I was sitting in a chemistry lecture, taking notes on my iPad, when like 30 people inboxed me, saying overall ‘CHECK TWITTER!’ I was so confused, just staring a my screen like, "wtf is going on???" 😭 I legit thought something bad happened, so I checked Twitter all dramatically like I was about to read a scandal.  

First off, I just love seeing updates from @fantasia-kitt. And since y’all were MAYBE waiting for my "official statement"—because apparently, I’m the top writer that actually enjoys writing about Geo (which, fair, I do take almost every request I get)—here it is:  

I admire it ♡. Like deadass, omg.

Seeing Geo as Aroace just makes so much sense, like I already knew funny enough. It fits him perfectly—both personality-wise and character-wise. If there was ever a character who would straight-up say, "I literally do not have the time nor interest in a relationship,"

It’s literally him.

That being said… yeah, I guess this means almost everything I’ve written about Geo so far isn’t exactly accurate. Especially when it comes to writings like [ 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒾𝓇 𝓀𝒾𝓃𝓀𝓈 ] or [ 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝒷𝒶𝓇𝒾 ]—to tell ya'll the truth, I was kinda hated writing those. 

I still lowkey head cannon him into Japanese bondage, Shibari—in a non sexual manner, like he just wanted to learn because he just happens to be interested in it.

Yes, I did a lot of research for them, but to keep it real, I only wrote them for my dearest readers because, at the time, there was barely any NSFW content for Geo, and everyone kept asking for it.

However, at the back of my brain, I already knew it didn’t fit his character, which was my original plan to never write it in the first place. If I’m being honest, I do feel a tiny bit disappointed—not at Geo being Aroace now.

Like, I’m actually hyped about that.

Sidenote—Do you know how rare perfectly written Aroace, aro, or even just ace representation is? 

HARDLY ANYWHERE.

It’s a constant battle trying to explain to people that this is who I am, and half the time, they just don’t get it because no one really talks about it.

So seeing a character like Geo, who actually fits the identity so well, is a huge win. It’s more about the fact that I knew I understood his character so well, but I kept holding myself back and writing him wrong—just to please everyone.

That’s on me, and I’ll never do it again.

So, this short update hits close to home.

Like Fantasia mentioned, "Geo has a special place in my heart since he reflects my own sexuality as well being an Aroace and I thinks this fits him more personality and character-wise." End quote.

And truthfully, same.

As mentioned, I’m asexual—like, if you’ve been on my blog for even five seconds, you’ve probably seen the spade symbols everywhere or my about me pinned post. It’s my way of repping my sexuality—hell, I even wear it as jewelry daily.

Also, a thought: I might be aro too, but I haven’t done a deep dive into that yet. Relationships have never really been my thing, and my priorities have always been my academics and career, so… maybe? Who knows.

Like, I’ll probably sit with it over the summer when I finally have some free time to contemplate my existence properly.

For those who don’t know me personally… let’s see…

if I had to sum up my personality, just picture Dr. Cristina Yang from Grey’s Anatomy or Kyoko Kirigiri from Danganronpa (btw, Kyoko is the only character in that game I care about). That should give you a pretty solid idea of how I operate.

That being said, I’m definitely still writing about Geo.

Don’t get it twisted—I was never gonna stop. I’ll just be going off my own thoughts now, and hopefully, everyone’s cool with that.

But please, for the love of all that is holy, do not ask me to write that Sol and Geo threesome. I was deadass joking in [ 𝒿𝑒𝓁𝓁𝓎 ]. Same with Hyugo and Geo x Reader request in a relationship—logically, it just doesn’t click for me to write something like that.

I enjoy writing about Geo—he’s one of my comfort characters (which, mind you, I only have like four on that list). And honestly?

Still my ideal type. I relate to him a lot. Not saying I’d date myself, but when I write him, I often think, "How would I react?"—except I dial up the arrogance, smugness, and overall asshole energy.

And before you ask, "Why the hell would you even want to date someone like that?"—leave me alone. 😭 

Again, dating isn’t exactly high on my priority list.

I just think about it sometimes—mostly because my parents won’t get off my ass about it. They keep saying, “Don’t waste your life just focusing on work,” but like… I genuinely don’t have any desire for it. I just want to enjoy life, make a decent living, and maybe—if anything—consider marriage way down the line.

But if I HAD to pick, it’ll be Geo.

Like in a best friends kind of way. Personally he’ll be so understanding because he too feel this way. I’ll annoy him so much.

The reason why, to me, relationships are just really close friendships with extra steps. If you’re dating someone, shouldn’t they also be your best friend? Deadass my friends call me weird for thinking that way, however I like to see it that way. 

This is why the only piece I actually enjoyed writing was [ 𝓉𝓎𝓅𝑒 𝑜𝒻 𝒷𝑜𝓎𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹 ]—ironic isn’t it? I just thought of Geo and me as best friends and converted that into something for whoever was reading.

I always saw it as experiencing romantic and sexual attraction differently than most people. Relationships aren’t one-size-fits-all—they take on different forms depending on the people involved.

With Geo, I was just being transparent about who he is, what his needs and boundaries are, and how that shapes his dynamics with others.

Same goes for real life—your needs, your expectations, their needs, their expectations… It all comes down to communication. 

That’s everything.

And like Geo isn’t heartless now. If you play “Rizz the Wolf”, it just proves how much Geo actually cares about his friends. Like dude, look at how he treats Crowe and Deryl. Sure, he was pissed at Deryl for touching him and just straight-up being goofy, but he still let him do it.

And Crowe? Crowe did so much for Geo. It’s literally in the game’s glossary that Crowe helped him after he got kicked out of high-class society. No wonder Geo wipes Crowe’s face with a napkin. 

Not gonna lie, kinda wish that was me.😗

What I’m getting at is—this all just clicks.

So yeah, Geo not doing romantic relationships?

Officially canon. He doesn’t see the point, doesn’t have the time, and honestly? This just gives me even more material to work with—so stay tuned for the next post ! !

I’ll catch y’all later—thanks for listening to my rambling, my dearest readers. ♤

[astonmartingf]

HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT ; MSC47

childhood friends to lovers! mick schumacher x verstappen!reader . . . when push comes to shove, you would never admit to having a crush on mick as you grew older. this however ends up with you convincing yourself that he would never love you outside the platonic relationship you built through the years, despite all evidence pointing to the obvious— he loves you, but you think not.

amgf this has been plaguing my mind, and after writing atrocious angst (ybom) i'm here to write a palate cleanser on my mind 😔 i also chose to write this instead of study for a chemistry exam, i keep making the wrong decisions but seeing as i made this was it so wrong??? i think not. enjoy like always 👍

yourusername

liked by mickschumacher, maxverstappen1, and 76,863 others

yourusername some things never change 🐻

view comments...

user1 and now what? what are we?????

user2 awww baby mick and baby yn are adorable

user3 the way yn is more attached to mick than max

user4 i remember in an interview where jos said when he couldn't find yn he'd look for mick since he was a tall boy

user5 wait where? when was this?

user6 in an old interview, idk when but it was with michael as well

user7 they're actually so adorable, oh my gosh

mickschumacher terrorizing the earth, one forest at a time, here's to more hikes in the future 💖

yourusername you bet i'll be there, it's scary how we aren't sick of each other yet

mickschumacher i mean it's you, why would i be sick of you?

yourusername as you should!!! i'm great to be with

maxverstappen1 mick is just too kind to kick you out

yourusername you're jealous we kicked you out!

user8 they're actually all that's in my head

user9 how are they not dating????

user10 because people of different sex can be friends?

user11 i get the shipping but they're good as friends so why?

user12 i mean they look good together, it's just wishful thinking

user13 oh imagine having a good looking childhood friend and not dating them, ofc they've been friends for so long wtf

user14 i mean, they are a good match so, leave people alone for shipping them

user15 they may be a good match but it's still weird so idgaf you're wrong

mickschumacher

liked by yourusername and 726,947 others

mickschumacher with the feel of your hand on mine 🐇

view comments...

user16 oh gosh please help them realize what they're made for each other

user17 i was so convinced they're just friends but then mick pulls shit like this

user18 i can't keep on defending you if you do this???? boy?

yourusername if you hadn't held my hand then and there i would've flown away

mickschumacher okay that's exaggerating, but as if i'd let that happen

yourusername because it was so strong, you were holding my hand tightly

mickschumacher are you complaining or thanking me?

yourusername thank you mick 🫡 you're the bestest friend ever

user19 they're actually driving me insane

user20 even the wind ships them

user21 don't you think that's the universe making a sign to both of you?

user22 "as if i'd let that happen" okay mick, wtfffff why is he doing this?

user23 they can't keep doing this and just pulling the best friend card at the end, they need to hold responsibility for us

liked by maxverstappen1

user24 bro max liked????

user25 what does he know? wym??? max oomf, why are you liking this comment?

user26 max is tired of their bullshit i know

user27 if max is tired we can be of help, i for one am volunteering out of the goodness of my heart and not because of my nosy ass

user28 okay yn and mick you can share it with the class

yourusername

liked by gina_schumacher, victoriaverstappen, and 86,047 others

yourusername a week of mick 🐻

view comments...

user29 yn is with mick instead of being at a grand prix????

user30 you're telling me they're just friends? shut up actually

user31 i'm deluding myself and saying they're dating

user32 they're so cute (they're driving me crazy 😮‍💨😩😭😀😊🥹😠)

mickschumacher thank you for watching me hase

yourusername ofc!!!! i am your number one fan bärchen 💖

maxverstappen1 is this the important thing you have going on?

yourusername yes it is, it's not like you won or smth

maxverstappen1 wow... am i going to have to steal you from mick now?

yourusername bold of you to assume i would leave mick

user33 they're actually insane wtgfhfjg

yourusername uploaded a new story

[look, it's a bear!] [jk it's my boyfriend hehehehe]

view replies to your story...

user34 OH NOOOO

user35 is this MICK? hello? mick stand up??!

user36 what about mick 🥹

user37 a soft launch out of nowhere? wth????

user38 this is mick? it's Mick isn't it? please tell me tkzusbdkajdj I NEED TO KNOW!NNN

mickschumacher you're evil hase, what have you done

i want to have you to myself a little longer, is that so wrong 😠

mickschumacher i don't think anyone can have me like you do

YEAH!! that's right, i love you bärchen 💖

mickschumacher i love you hase 💖

[phantom-of-the-501st]

What happened to Echo between the Citadel and his rescue from Skako?

I started randomly thinking about this and it got stuck in my brain so now we're yapping about it.

The thing is, the initial assumption when watching the Bad Batch arc is that Echo has been kept in a stasis chamber with cables stuck in his head for a year(ish). But that doesn't actually make much sense when you think about it and because of that I don't think that that was the initial plan. So here's a vague outline of what I think was going on with Echo between S3 and S7.

Echo would have been found by the Separatists, and the fact that he was alive would have been of great interest to them because it means they could have a clone in their possession that they could try and use. Now the first few days/months (depending on the quality of healthcare) would have been spent waiting for Echo to recover enough. Following that, the Separatists would have likely tortured Echo in an attempt to get information out of him because, lets be honest, spending a load of money to extract information from his brain by hooking him up to a machine would not be the logical first step. That's the "oh fuck nothing is working" stage of planning.

And the thing is, whatever torture methods they likely put Echo through didn't do a whole lot because otherwise they would have been using the information they got from him a hell of a lot sooner. Echo probably spent who knows how long being tortured (and we've seen Andor. We know the shit the Empire does) and gave them nothing. Give that man some credit because wtf.

And then what? They have a clone (more specifically and ARC trooper) in their possession and they aren't going to let that opportunity go to waste so easily, so they devise a new plan. If they can't get anything out of him, then how else can they use him?

It's this bit that I think explains why Echo has so many prosthetics for a man being held in a container for months on end. If you have a prisoner you don't want escaping, why give him legs? That seems counterintuitive. And why give him a scomp? Honestly, I don't think the Separatists initially handed him over to the Techno Union for information extraction. I think they wanted to brainwash Echo into something that they could control, to turn him into a droid.

Look at the CX troopers. The Empire has taken clones to convert them into brainwashed agents and I wouldn't be surprised if Echo ended up being a test run for that. The fact that he has prosthetic limbs suggests that gave him to the TU with the promise of payment if they could turn him into something they could use. Who better to help fight against the GAR than someone who was trained by them and knows their fighting style?

However, that plan clearly didn't pan out either because when Rex and the Batch find him, he's hooked up to machines in a stasis chamber. What I think happened is that after weeks/months of Plan B not working out, the Separatists threatened to withhold payment from the TU unless they actually gave them something useful. And with nothing else working, I think the TU went to the only option they could really think of: to wire Echo into a machine and forcibly remove the information.

It explains the prosthetic limbs and it explains why it took so long for anyone to notice that the Separatists had Echo's strategies. I think they tried other things with him, and when that failed, went for the only option they had that actually worked.

Now that does raise the question of why Echo thinks he's still at the Citadel when they initially remove him. If he's spent several months conscious and being tortured/experimented on before being plugged in, then why does he not know that time has passed?

I think the answer is simply that he's disoriented. It probably took a second for his brain to catch up with where he was following the data extraction. And honestly, that would explain why Echo doesn't seem to be confused at any point following that when it comes to what period of time it is. There's no "wtf do you mean it's been a year?" moment, he just kind of falls back into things. I think it just took a couple of minutes for him to reorient himself before he was aware of where he was and what was happening. And to be honest, I wouldn't be surprised if there're periods of time that have been blocked from his memory as a trauma response. That would also explain why he only ever talks about Skako specifically and nothing else.

So yeah, that's my ramble on what I think happened to Echo. I truly don't think that the stasis chamber was the initial plan. It seems like a last resort following failed attempts at other things. Either way, I just wanna give Echo a hug because he's been through a lot. :')

Tagging soon Echo-loving moots in case they want to read this :D

@saturn-sends-hugs @the-bi-space-ace @nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius

[kireilien]

maki w a reader that just can’t go to sleep without sex / cumming :( it’s so bad that when he’s away he gets a custom dildo of his dick for reader to use :(

if u take anons can i be 🩰 ?

SQUIRTING CONTEST TARGET IS MAKI WTF YOUR BRAIN IS SO FUCKING HUGE 🩰 ANON I KISS UR BRAIN

tw/cw. nsfw content, cursing; dom!maki, sub!reader, fem!reader, race neutral reader, established relationship, idol!maki, clingy!reader, female masturbation, use of sex toys, phone sex, praise, slightly implied ddlg (i can’t help it), use of “princess”

the box is perfectly placed at your apartment door step as maki picks it up— the two of you have been waiting for a while! finally, the one and only clone-a-willy is here! backtracking to a month ago, your somewhat recent relationship, you recently discovered an interesting predicament with maki. 

you can’t go to sleep without his cock.

ever since you two started dating, maki has always been so kind and fucked you asleep. the two of you thought it wouldn’t be a problem, since you’ve never had this problem before in your previous relationships. but, it suddenly became a problem when maki had to leave to korea for promotions. you were twisting and turning in bed, almost as if it was a living nightmare. sure you were clingy over maki– constantly holding his hand when he was home, kissing him everywhere, wanting to hear his voice all the time. 

but it’s just because you were pent up, right?

slipping your hands past your underwear band, you rubbed your clit so feverishly, it fucking hurt like shit. okay sure, how about you finger yourself? you nearly punctured yourself by how fast you were aiming for your g-spot. shit, fine let’s use a vibrating dildo– killing two birds with one stone– not! not even the sex toy you've had for the longest time couldn’t even make you cum now.

maki fucking changed you. 

when you woke up that day all groggy, you called maki, “i fucking hate you.” maki sputters over the line, “y/n, that was a dream– i didn’t cheat on you.” you laugh a little, “no it’s not that.” maki hums, “then what is it? what’s making you hate me?” you mumble, a little embarrassed, “i can’t go to sleep without you.” it’s maki’s turn to laugh, “awh, princess you miss me? it’s only a week, i’ll be in your arms again.”

you’re groaning. surely he’s not this dumb right? “no, maki. like– i can’t go to sleep without you fucking me,” you whisper softly against the screen. maki looks around the room, the members and staff are everywhere. he excuses himself to walk in the less busy hallway, “y’know, i thought this might happen,” he sighs. 

your fingers tap at your phone case, “so… what do i do?” maki sucks in a breath, “how about i buy a dildo mold. when i get back, i’ll make one for you. deal?” you hum, that’s actually not a bad idea. i mean, how else are you gonna solve this issue? 

maki unboxes the package, seeing the cylinder and the black text, this was a joke. but, he was gonna do it for you, even if the process is a little silly. “do you think my dick will fit?” he jokes as he sets the stuff on your bathroom counter. “okay— alright maki, you’re thick but not that thick,” you laugh as he laughs with you. 

the two of you carefully observe the directions, cleaning off maki (making sure he stays soft), opening the mold, slowly pressing his cock in, bottoming out, waiting a bit, pulling out, waiting for the mold to harden, and finally filling it in with the silicone medium. as it dries though, maki has to gives you the real thing, making sure you don’t forget what the real one feels like when you do use it. 

but the cycle repeats. 

he leaves once more, this time only for a few days for a festival. you finally get to try it out. you’re nestled in bed and you’re holding the dildo in hand. you’re slowly inserting it, it’s so familiar– but not. it’s the exact same, but it’s a gummier texture. you’re sliding it back and forth, your pussy is creamier than other times when you’ve masturbated. it’s… actually working. you get so clouded in your thoughts, with no other foreplay, you cum. 

you open your eyes wide, you actually came?! 

but why does it feel like it’s not enough? 

peering at your phone, you see the clock, it’s 11:18/23:18. maki’s most likely not doing anything this late. you dial his number, he immediately picks up, “hey, princess. you’re up late,” he hums. you laugh, “i just used the dildo.” he cocks a brow, “was it good– compare it to my cock?” you laugh once more, “it actually made me cum.” maki straightens up, “no way, you’re kidding.” he’s actually shocked that that dildo could make you cum. “yeah, but it can’t fuck me to sleep like you do,” you sigh. there’s a quick silence from the other end before maki speaks up. 

“slip it back in, princess. i’ll help you.” 

you do as he says, slipping the dildo between your folds. you keep a good pace, a little slower than maki would do. “that’s it, fuck yourself like that dildo is my cock.” he murmurs, voice switching on those good chemicals in your head. your pace quickens, your breath hitches, whimpers of his names are leaving your lips. “good job, princess. fuck yourself silly, ‘kay? do it f’ me. do it good f’ me.” his voice is getting deeper, he’s definitely getting hard. his voice cracks, “god, you’re probably so pretty fucking yourself so good– i miss you, princess.” you whine out, “ah–! ‘m close–!” maki grits, “c’mon, cum f’ me.” 

once maki says those words, your hands jitter and you cum over the silicone. you’re worked out, your eyelids are heavy, did he just fuck you out over the phone? maki chuckles over the phone, “what did i say?” you hum, unable to speak. “hah, ‘s okay, princess. good night.” maki disconnects the call as you lay there, off to dream world. 

is maki gonna cheat on you now?

back 2 maki catalog

[ivyvenus333]

satosugu crack fic!!!!!

a/n: wrote this as a twitter threadfic,, and the difference between writing for twitter vs tumblr is comically insane. this is so unserious and shittily written, but that's what makes it fun ;) poorly written smut at the end:)

satosugu who know that they have feelings for one another, but being the first to admit it would just be “too gay.” so instead, they resort to a game of chicken, trying to make the other jealous enough to break first. the lengths they (mostly gojo) go to are insane.

gojo pays shoko $1,500 to give him hickies. ("$500." "who the fuck do you think I am?" "$1,000?" "double it and give it to the next person." "$1,500?" "fine. you spoiled rich bitch.") they are both literally gagging as it's happening and shoko actually barfs after, but gojo is left with a giant purple bruise on the nape of his neck, so he's happy.

gojo runs into geto in their shared kitchen the next morning, wearing an off-the-shoulder comfy t-shirt of course. did he cut the neckline of one of his shirts? doesn't matter. and gojo is so annoyed when geto says nothing even after his eyes clearly drift down to his neck. whatever, at least he saw it.

"what are you doing today, suguru?"

"nothing much. have a coffee date at noon but i'm free the rest of the day after that."

he's joking, right?

"with who?"

"you wouldn't know her," geto comments as he grabs his plate and heads towards the living room to eat on the couch. he can't help but smirk when he hears the patter of gojo's footsteps following him.

"what's her name, suguru?"

"doesn't matter. you don't know her."

truth is, obviously geto doesn't have a date. but around 11:30am he walks into gojo's room with his hair pulled up into a neat bun (gojo's favorite hairstyle of his), tight dress pants, and no shirt. because it's wrinkled and he needs the iron from satoru's room, obviously. gojo's face is priceless, aquamarine eyes widening in shock before scoffing and calling geto a slut.

"since when has the iron ever been in my room. go check the linen closet." thank god suguru listens and leaves his room because wtf is that growing in his pants. (this is what i mean, sooo unserious im sorry).

geto now has to find some way to pass the couple of hours he allegedly has a date. so he goes to shoko's who demolishes him for what he's wearing. he talks to her about the hickies he saw on gojo's neck and asks if he's mentioned anything about seeing someone.

gojo promptly gets a text that reads "send me $500 right now if you don't want me to tell suguru about who you gave you those hickies."

the money is sent before gojo realizes that, wait? suguru is with shoko?

"where are you guys right now?"

"my house. you're not invited. don't show up."

now that would be too good. but gojo isn't going to let geto know that he know he's lying.

instead, when geto gets back, gojo is all over suguru asking how it went, what is she like, show me a picture, why won't you suguru, were you lying about the whole thing? the most geto says is that it went well and he has plans with her next weekend.

"what if we have a double date instead? I can meet this mystery woman, and you can meet mine," gojo says, pointing at the fading hickies on his neck. cringe.

suguru agrees, he's not sure why, but now they're both fucked. what they don't know is that both of them resort to the same solution - finding a girl on the streets that's attractive enough and explaining that they need help making someone jealous and 'i know this is so awkward but please.' gojo's girl agrees after being offered an obscene amount of money, of course, and geto's girl agrees just because he's pretty.

the week passes and the girls come over to their place for dinner. everyone is in a little bit of shock when geto's girl is pale, blonde and blue-eyed, and gojo's obviously a long-haired brunette with brown eyes.

(the girls excuse themselves to the bathroom to have a giggle fest, and oh my god they're so into each other so let's devise a plan to make this happen. they're fujoshis what can i say)

the girls take the lead, each being so touchy with their respective 'dates' and laughing at their unfunny jokes. the dinner goes fine save for the awkward stares that gojo and geto give to the girls sitting across from them. the girls pryyy, with "hey, it's almost like your each others type!" and all they get are awkward chuckles because wtf. whatever whatever.

after dinner, the 'couples' retreat to their rooms. the conversations each 'couple' has go about the same. "oh my god, you're in love with him aren't you. you know what would really make him jealous? if we pretend to have sex." (totally definitely not planned by the girls earlier.)

cue obnoxious moaning noises from each room, and the sounds of beds creaking (its them at the foot of the bed trying to hide their giggles as they jerk the bed back and forth). the plan is failing, because the respective girls admit to gojo and geto what they spoke to each other about earlier and now everyone in that house knows that the noises coming from the other room are fake.

a while later, satoru and suguru walk the girls out at the same time (plot device). gojo and geto receive friendly glares, the girls' eyebrows comically raised and eyes going back and forth between the two as if saying bffr and get on with it. when the door clicks shut, gojo and geto turn to one another, mouths slightly open and each one trying to figure out what to say. geto speaks first.

"really, gojo?"

"don't 'gojo' me. really what, suguru?"

"do you think i'm stupid?"

"yeah, i do. stop being elusive, what are you talking about, suguru."

"the hickies, the girl you've been seeing who didn't know what digimon was (this somehow came up at the dinner idk), your whole charade?"

"i know you were at shoko's during your alleged coffee date. idiot," gojo blurts.

"yeah well shoko told me who gave you those hickies."

"what! i paid her $500 not to tell you."

"and i'm $250 richer, satoru."

gojo scowls because this whole thing is so stupid and they're both so dumb. he doesn't really know what to say to that. but fuck shoko, he thinks.

"are you done, satoru?" suguru says as he takes a step closer to gojo.

"done with what?" gojo says, eyes drifting and voice softer than normal because suguru suddenly seems so so close, and he smells so good, and he looks so pretty.

geto takes two fingers and places them under gojo's chin, tilting his face up and leaving him with no option but to make eye contact.

"satoru, come on. stop pretending."

"stop pretending what?" god he is so annoying.

"that you don't want this" gojo winces because god geto is so sexy and so onto him and there's no avoiding this.

"want what?"

ok, geto has had enough of satoru answering him with questions and you know what, they both want this, so fucking fine he'll make the first move.

"i hate you," geto says, leaning in so the tips of their noses are barely touching, his breath ghosting gojo's face, his lips, as he speaks.

"clearly," gojo whispers with shakey breath as his eyes drift down towards geto's lips.

geto can't help but roll his eyes because of course gojo would still be an annoying brat while this is happening.

they're unsure of who leans in first, but it doesn't even matter because suddenly they're kissing and it's just so sweet. their hands frantically roam each other's bodies and soft groans escape their mouth as their kiss deepens and suddenly gojo is pressed against the door, suguru's hands gripping his waist and his thumbs digging into his hip bones.

geto pulls away briefly just to tease gojo with a "is this what you wanted, satoru?"

gojo shakes his head.

"no? so you want me to stop?"

gojo whines and it's the sexiest thing geto has ever heard.

"tell me what you want 'toru."

and all he says (whines) is "more."

geto lets out a mocking 'tch' before sliding his hands up the sides of gojo's body, fingers suddenly perched and tugging at his silky undercut. gojo is so pliant, immediately tilting his head to give geto access to his neck.

"ah, so you want this," geto says while dragging his tongue up satoru's pretty, pale neck. gojo moans like a bitch which only encourages geto to sink his teeth into his skin and start sucking.

"want me to give you hickies?" and geto's question is stupid because of course he already knows satoru's answer.

anyways, they are both so turned on and things escalate when geto instinctually ruts his hips forward into gojo's. and omg they can feel each other's boners and holy shit both of them are huge.

"more, more, more" gojo repeats like a sacred mantra as geto peppers kisses along his jaw line.

geto gets the point. and his lips are back on gojo's and his hands are wrapping around to squeeze gojo's ass before wrapping them around the back of his thighs - a silent demand to jump. gojo does, obviously, but his legs don't wrap fully around geto's waist. geto hooks his hands under gojo's knees, forcing his legs to stay open and giving geto just the perfect access to thrust his hips fowards and upwards creating the most perfect friction as their cocks grind against one another.

"want me to take you to the bedroom, and have real sex?"

"not funny, you were faking it too, suguru."

suguru chuckles and carries him to his bedroom, and anyways they have sex and it's the best thing either of them have ever experienced. and gojo being gojo says "i hope you know we're dating now" as the two cuddle and catch their breaths afterwards.

"i know, satoru."

and the two talk and giggle about how disgusting it was that shoko gave gojo hickies, and how long they've both wanted that and "suguru, can i try being on top next time?" "no." "ok." and once they've rested they go again and again all night.

the two become good close friends with those girls, who are obviously sat front and center at their wedding.

[luvhughes43]

instagram official | blake hughes au

blake hughes masterlist

blake.hughes

liked by nicohischier, jackhughes, trevorzegras, and others

blake.hughes life lately :)

view all comments

jackhughes suit jacket looks a lil familiar...🧐

blake.hughes oh really?😁

nicohischier whoevers jacket it is has really nice taste! liked by blake.hughes

trevorzegras 🤭🤭

user00 wtf are u giggling about?

blake.hughes wait trev do u know?

trevorzegras yea jack called a mandatory ft a few days ago

blake.hughes omfg??

trevorzegras im happy for u goldie!

user01 BLAKE WATCH OUT!!! THERES A MAN BESIDE U!!

user02 blakes got a bf? omg im so happy for her

user03 monroes the cutest cat omfg

user04 wait can we acknowledge trevor calling blake goldie? what is that

user05 its been a thing for awhile now! he started calling her goldie after she won olympic gold! he mentioned it in an interview or something i think

user04 NICO NICO NICO

nicohischier

liked by blake.hughes, john.marino97, trevorzegras, and others

nicohischier Happy Holidays!😈❤️

view all comments

jackhughes 🔥🔥

blake.hughes 😈

user09 using the "😈" when soft launching ur teammates sister is crazy

user10 waittt who's he dating?

user09 streets are saying hes dating blake hughes! she recently posted a soft launch AND she was caught liking thirst edits of him😭

user10 oh theyre so unserious😭😭

comments on this post is limited

blake.hughes added to their story !

nicohischier posted one minute ago!

liked by jackhughes, blake.hughes, lhughes_06, and others

nicohischier the best december :)

tagged: blake.hughes

view all comments

blake.hughes :)

blake.hughes you make me beyond happy

nicohischier Du bringst mich zum Lächeln❤️

jackhughes nice but was the last pic really necessary?

nicohischer my bad

lhughes_06 does this mean I get to call you dad now?

jackhughes no

_quinnhughes no

user17 BLAKE???????

user18 OMFG ITS CONFIRMED THEY BOTH POSTED

user18 at the same time too like thats soulmatism😭🙏

user19 nicos reply in german... im gonna kms theyre so cute wtf😭

blake.hughes posted 1 minute ago!

liked by nicohischier, _quinnhughes, trevorzegras and others

blake.hughes my nico<3

tagged: nicohischier

view all comments

jackhughes … yours🤨

jackhughes pretty sure he was mine first bud

blake.hughes right but out of the two of us, who does he spend his nights with?

jackhughes WOAH?????

trevorzegras i think he’s ALL of ours

jackhughes no

blake.hughes no

nicohischier my girl❤️

trevorzegras 👽🍿

blake.hughes ok

_quinnhughes FINALLY🙏

jackhughes ?

_quinnhughes i’ve been waited for MONTHS for them to go ig official you don’t understand

jackhughes how tf did you find out so soon? Dawson literally told me like 2 weeks ago

_quinnhughes I know everything.

jackhughes alright mr. “i don’t really consider myself someone who knows what’s going on”

_quinnhughes they probably could’ve made out in front of you and you still wouldn’t have realized… mr. “I didn’t know there was a city in New Jersey”

trevorzegras Trevor ZEGRAS🧡

user20 in every pic of blake and nico hes always touching her in some way... like he loves her so bad they are my parents

user21 THE WAY BLAKE LOOKS AT NICO IM GOING TO JUMP OFF A BRIDGE THEY LOOK SO IN LOVE

user22 oh to be a fly on the wall when jack found out about the news...

user23 bro was definitely pouting he has such intense middle child syndrome

user24 MY NICO... MY GIRL??? ?OHHH ITS SO OVER THEY'RE SO DAMN CUTE

user25 i'm so glad that blake is happy after everything that happened... she deserves it the most<33

user26 NICO AND BLAKE ARE FR DATING??? WHY WHY WHY WHY

user27 ? get serious

[the-menace-in-pink]

The real story behind Shizuku joining the Phantom Troupe

I feel like Shizuku’s recruitment in the Troupe happened completely by accident. Like, she stopped by their hideout to deliver pizzas or something. Then, Pakunoda or a sleepy Phinks let her inside and told her to wait while they go fetch some cash after realizing the Troupe’s communal jar was empty—thanks to Franklin and Machi’s secret late night food orders.

And like, immediately after Phinks walked away, she started wandering around the hideout and somehow ended up in Chrollo’s study. He didn’t notice her at first since he was busy dissecting and poking around at the prisoner Feitan had just accidentally killed (oopsies). Then she prob spotted some fresh blood on a nearby bookshelf and without thinking twice activated Blinky and vacuumed up the shit out of the entire shelf before anyone could stop her.

And like before Chrollo got to fully process the loss of a beloved fraction of his carefully curated collection, she started vacuuming away the 2-3 corpses laying around that they had been arguing over who had to clean up. She didn’t seem the least bothered by it so they were all like wait—WHERE DID THAT GO?

Feitan’s just like??? WHERE THE FUCK’S MY PRISONER??? BRING THEM BACK.

While Chrollo’s standing there staring at her like she’s the manifestation of all his pet-peeves and grudges packaged in one boba-eyed, vacuum-yielding peasant.

And she looks equally confused like wtf do you mean what did I do… I cleaned? Made yall a favor?? Idk?? 👁️ 👄 👁️

Phinks’ fully sober, fists tightening like WHO LET HER IN?????

While Pakunoda’s blanching at Chrollo’s traumatized face then yelling back at Phinks like YOU DID. WHAT DID WE SAY ABOUT LEAVING RANDOM PEOPLE UNSUPERVISED IN OUR PROPERTY???

(Also the corpses were most likely unlucky people Phinks left unsupervised as he went to fetch for money too. The way this is sounding like a crack retelling of Blue Beard—)

- Cue chaotic interrogations (during which she reveals she has no fucking idea where the vacuumed objects go, and that she don’t really gaf, tho she can bring back corpse #3 since it’s the last thing Blinky ate up…. Chrollo has to hold back tears, while Machi’s making sure the threads she’s discreetly tied around him are holding up),

- Some stray stabbings (thanks, Feitan)

- Pakunoda’s memory probing (she finds out Shizuku’s a black belt)

- Back-and-forth exchanges as they try to piece together wtf went down. At some point someone’s just like… Let’s recruit her, she’s kinda insane and so detached… gonna be useful.

Chrollo was 100% okay with recruiting her ass, bc yes, what she did is unforgivable, but he’s a tactician first and foremost. But he was veeeeery lukewarm (at best) towards her for like weeks. Like she just vacuumed to another dimension one of his favorite book series lmao. He’s taking her existence very personally.

For like the first couple of weeks he’d just darkly glare at her whenever she entered a room, and be so petty with the missions assigning. He’d send her on the most tedious ones (oftent to acquire and retrieve rare books and scrolls to build back his lost shelf…) and would use disturbing threats and rules regarding her nen ability use as some kind of psychological torture.

‘If you so much as look at the cover for more than 1 second, Feitan will handle you.’

‘Eyes down when you enter a library. Have some shame.’

‘You’re not allowed to fight with Bingo. If you die, that’s a skill issue.’

Shizuku: it’s Blinky.

(At this point Pakunoda’s walking around with handcuffs just in case — for Shizuku, Chrollo and Feitan)

Eventually they all soften and warm up to her, even Chrollo though his grudge over his lost books never disappears lol. He starts to find her endearing like a little sister… and honestly, what’s the difference between her little mishaps and his pet cat? Exactly.

Also the house has new rules after she joins:

- Shizuku shall NEVER be assigned to cleaning duties. Never. Even if it’s a regular vacuum.

- Shizuku can’t conjure Blinky near anything valuable or edible. They can’t have her starve them to death.

- Never leave her unsupervised if there’s a 1% chance she might stare for too long at a fellow member’s stuff.

(Also on like day 5 of her trial period as a spider, they find out she randomly disposed of the OG delivery guy. Turns out she knocked him dead and stole his scooter on an impulse, and made her way to the hideout purely out of curiosity.)

[midnight1nk]

So, this week's episode...

[Spoilers below cut]

save me SMG4 episode save me

(the following is my live reaction:)

moo-stache moo-stache moo-stache

why do I feel like Pedro's going to be here?

"bruh Pedro was just a one-time thing." they literally killed off Mickey, ANYTHING can happen

KAIZO YOU'RE BACK HI

OMG please tell me someone from the Team saw this fan animation and put it in the episode as a nod to the animator, that would be awesome!!!

btw great fan animation, go check it out if you haven't [link]

YAYYYY, c'mon Mario you gotta spend time with your brother :)

also I need to find a playthrough of this game while I work

whoops my hand slipped [*makes 4 say "I should've chosen the USB over you, 3"*] :)

Hey Shroomy :D ....oh *western spaghetti flashbacks*

like seriously, I can't hear that audio the same way again

helicopter helicopter (copter)

oh hey swag *he fades away* NOOOOOO

well, digging did (mostly, sorta) help the last episode

OMG HI HI HI MY SILLIES

Three, why are you here if you think it's stupid? unless... 🫵 🏳️‍🌈⁉️

it's giving "I'm only here to support my boyfriend's interests", like I'm starting to believe that they truly are dating behind the scenes

they're on a date, your honor 💙💜

and there they go bickering again smh /affectionate

I'd like to think that ever since Four drives a forklift, that's just his method of transportation. screw the car, we're taking this baby out for a spin :)

Mario, you need to be ✨forklift certified✨

sorry, just Three's gayass poses give me life

actually yeah why is the line not moving?

the boys :)

also that walk animation tho

HOW LONG IS THIS LINE?!

also c'mon Three, show us your dance moves :D

oooooh that editing i love that

THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING

now that they've mentioned it, why are there so many conventions happening at the same time? hmmmmm *game theory theme starts playing*

SMG3: "Maybe they're lining up to go to your mom's house. That line's usually pretty long." DAYUM THREE

"the line doesn't end" ayo wtf????

shroomy, you've eaten mushrooms before and you had no problem with that

....it really is the end of the world huh

ONE WEEK LATER?!?!?!?

"there is no end" "the end will come" me, sitting in the corner: hmmmmmmmmm

whelp, it's confirmed, I kin Four now

Three's not going coo co crazy, he's just vibin' :)

THIS IS WARRRRRR

this whole fighting scene omg it's SO good!

....WOTFI? ok no :P

AWWW THAT WAS ACTUALLY SWEET DUDE

CAN WE PLEASE GET A HUG? FOR ME SPECIFICALLY?

.... yeah uh Boopkins, you're going to have to explain what the hell you mean by that

not that it's surprising, we've been through a lot. just another Tuesday (or Saturday in this case)

MY HEART CAN'T TAKE ALL THIS FLUFF

HUG HUG HUG

THAT'S MY BOYS

RAVE PARTY [*dances*]

....sonic, is that you? sorry, my mind is still in the sonadow generations phase so I can't unsee them

:O wait, Boopkins, what did you mean by that?

MARTY?!?!? WTF

SMG4: "Don't worry, Mario. There's one way we can fix this." Beat the shit out of him...? YEAH I KNEW IT HAHA

*explodes*

and congrats to samgagmincho for your art featured at the end credits 🎉

.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.

This was a fun episode, I loved it!! Seeing my boys is always a plus and I appreciate the return of some side characters. With how the world is right now, I really needed this episode. So, thanks Team, for keeping my spirits up.

I just enjoyed watching my silly little guys doing silly little adventures. Traffic is a nightmare so I don't blame Mario in the slightest. Anyway, 3 and 4, how was your date? /silly

Can we just talk about the animation? It was so good!!! You really see the quality they put in, especially in that fighting scene. I didn't expect MARTY of all people to be the cause of all this. I honestly thought it was going to be a gag of something harmless just being in the middle of the road for no reason (like a turtle or smth) and the Crew being like "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!" but NOPE, Marty was here and apparently A SORCERER?! I really shouldn't be surprised, what am I talking about here. And ofc the OG duo immediately beating the shit out of him is so fucking funny to me. He didn't die (I know that), but he's definitely going to be more relevant in the future.

...puzzlevision 2? ok I'm sorry

SMG4 show and jokes aside, I hope you all are ok. No matter what happens, we'll stick together. Don't give them the satisfaction that they want. You aren't alone, and we'll keep on fighting.

Going to be a Sonic fan here, Sonic 06 is famously known to be... augh. But there is a good moment with Shadow that I think is relevant now:

Mephiles (the villain of the game): "It's futile. The world will betray you. Why fight at all? Why risk your life for those who will persecute you later?" Shadow: "If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight like I always have."

Take care, my dear fellows, and I'll see you all in my next post!! Hmmm, there is "no end" [*game theory intro plays*]

[letmebeyourcrrsh]

So you LIKE like me?

jeongin x fem!reader

warnings: should be non

genre: school crush

summary: you are the best friend of han jisung. you had switched to his school, where you met all of his friends, and instantly fell in love with I.N

it was your first day in this new school. a whole new chapter of your life! you had problems with your old class, so you finally decided to switch into your bestfriends school! han jisung was literally shining when he saw you stepping into his classroom.. he was so happy to finally have his bestfriend here! ofcourse he didnt even let you find a seat.. he quickly dragged you to where his 7 other friends were, so he could introduce you.. the boys were all so nice. so sweet that you instantly started liking them. but there was this one boy…

his name is yang jeongin.. and the moment he smiled at you so charming.. you knew you were cooked.

after class jisung texted you..

Jisung: UGH i still cant get over the fact you are here with me now!! You: IKR!! I shouldve switched earlier! Jisung: school will be so fun from now on! You: Well I am sure it wasnt boring before.. BUT YES!!! Jisung: anyways! Soooo.. what do you think about my friends? They are cool right? They were also really excited to finally meet you! You: oh is that so? thats good to hear! Your friends are awsome! I wasnt even worried to meet them, for how nice they were to me Jisung: felix almost bought you flowers.. as a welcome gift.. You: oh.. hes so sweet hm? Jisung: cute sunshine :3 OH AND HEY!!! This is an important question!!!! By any chance… did you fall for Innie… 🗿? You: WHATTTT!? Jisung: No seriously.. girl it is only your first day.. You: jisung wtf what are you talking about!? Jisung: I AM YOUR BESTFRIEND!!! I saw how you were looking at him.. I havent seen this face on you for the first time.. so i know damn well what that means You: NOO!!! IT DOESNT MEAN THAT!! I swear I am all good!! I was just looking.. Jisung: „ just looking “ Jisung: You looked like you were imagining wedding.. You: NO I WASNT? Jisung: dont worry girl i got you!

and that is how jisung added you to the groupchat...

Minho: ew who did you add. Jisung: Shut up thats literally my baby Minho: ew wtf? Minho: wait oh.. Felix: HIII!!!! You: hello! I.N: Heyy Hyunjin: OH IT IS THE NEW GIRLY!! HEYYY Seungmin: wow she already made it into this chat? Jisung: She is my best friend duh ofcourse she did Changbin: I AM SORRY?! I had to dance infront of the whole class mid presentation.. JUST SO YOU WOULD ADD ME?! Seungmin: sucks to be you. That was definitely NOT worth it Felix: heyyy... but if not this chat.. who would i spam tiktoks to? Seungmin: thats the problem Felix. Nobody watches them. Chan: i do.. Felix: Thank you Chan…. Felix: Anyways we are happy to have you here Y/N! Very happy to have you in our friendgroup! You: Thank you Felix! That means a lot :> Hyunjin: Are you single? You: ..yes I am.. Hyunjin: I am single too yk.. Jisung: Hyunjin no.. Hyunjin: But-..? I.N: no hyunjin… Hyunjin: But she is handsome.. Chan: Hyunjin stop..

you laughed a little at hyunjin.. also smiled a lot at the compliment. what a funny guy! but still you kinda wished that it would be jeongin instead… saying this..

a few weeks passed.. and a lot happened in these weeks! first of all.. jisung just would NOT stop teasing you and jeongin. it always embarrassed you so much.. but luckily jeongin always took it as a joke..

also you and the boys hanged out like A LOT!!

you had sweet study sessions with channie.. he would always help you with your homework, or to get ready for the next test!

minho and you went to a cat cafe a few times.. he even promised to show you his own cats! but it never came to that-

you also joined changbin in the gym a few times! it was so fun!!

hyunjin never stopped flirting with you.. but it all is jokingly! you sometimes even flirt back, which makes you both actually be really close friends!

the most of your freetime you spend with hannie tho. obviously.. he is your best friend after all. half of your hangouts were mostly about trying to get you closer to innie…

together with felix, you had baked brownies! a loooot of times.. you just LOVE them and gladly join to help him!

seungmin and you often work on pranks… you and him just love to team up to prank the other guys.. and it is always so fun!

while you and jeongin… well.. lets say you actually arent that close. honestly.. not close AT ALL.. as much as you try.. you just cant be close to him! the crush was getting worse and worse every single day.. and each and everytime you see innie… you just forget how to talk! you start getting so so nervous.. and so he wont find out, you decided it would be better to avoid him..  avoid him so badly that he himself started to feel bad..

I.N: Jisung Jisung: BABYBREAD!!! What you want? I.N: dont call me that. I.N: but ye so.. i wanted to ask you- does Y/N have some problem with me? Jisung: huh? What do you mean I.N: i mean she clearly does not like me or something.. does she find me weird? Or did i maybe do something- Jisung: wait why would you think that- I.N: Its obvious hyung. She likes EVERYONE but not me. She hangs out with EVERYONE, but i am being avoided. Like what did i do wrong? Maybe id also want to hangout and like game with her or something. But i just feel like… 9th wheel of a bus with 8 wheels— Jisung: oh innieeee dont worrryyy! She does not find you weird. She really does like you too I.N: then why is she acting like a stranger towards me? Han. You really should talk to her. And then tell me what her problem with me is. I really need to know. Jisung: honestly jeongin… why dont you do that yourself? I.N: no why would I? she avoids me so why would i talk to her Jisung: Just do it innie. Itll make way more sense then if i would.

you almost fell of your chair when you saw a message from jeongin pop up on your screen. omg omg why would he text you?! did you do something wrong? omg does he want to hangout? wait or.. wait no really.. what does he want from you-?

Jeongin: hey You: oh! hi innie! Jeongin: ye so i wanted to ask you something You: oh.. what is it? Jeongin: so like- please dont get me wrong.. i am just really curious- are you avoiding me? You: huh Jeongin: it just feels like you are- because.. you talk very well with everyone. But with me you are just.. idk- we barely talk- i mean it must sound weird of me to ask that.. but i just really want to know. Because you are such a sweet girl! And id love to talk to you more.. but even if I try, you dont let me. You: oh.. hey i am sorry- i didnt mean to make you feel like that- Jeongin: its alright i guess.. i just wanted to know- why you are doing that. Is it maybe because you and hyunjin are secretly dating? You: WHAT?! No wtf Jeongin: who knows.. you both are so flirty that maybe yall are dating- and hyunjin hates the fact u talk to others- You: ye nah- thats funny. But thats not true. He aint my type at all Jeongin: then are you avoiding me because you are annoyed at the fact that jisung teases you and me all the time? You: Jeongin no- its nothing from what you are saying and are about to say- Jeongin: what is it then? You: Jeongin.. just dont think of nothing bad okey? I dont have nothing against you- but still i will not tell you- i am sorry.. Jeongin: whatever then..

another week had passed.. and you started to regret everything.. why didnt you just tell him? maybe hed accept it- maybe he wouldnt judge the fact that he is your crush.. because the fact that you didnt tell him.. it ruined everything. now jeongin himself avoids you.. did you hurt him? or is he just doing what you „ want “ him to do…

you felt so bad that after class you once again texted han jisung..

You: Jisung i messed up.. Jisung: I assume its about jeongin? You: yes it is… Jisung: alright..? You: i must have hurt him! Jisung: You are overreacting- You: no i am not!! Now HE avoids me!! And i did NOT want that to happen!! Jisung: Y/N just talk to him… and tell him everything- before you make it worse. You: HAN!! How do you imagine that?! If id randomly tell him its all because i have feelings for him!! I dont even want to know how he would react!!! Jeongin: YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON ME?!

this was the end… what happened?! where did he come from..? you took a look at the chat.. and realised, it was the groupchat all along. and the boys had been reading without saying anything.. ugh!! that is when you started to panic very badly.. you felt so bad all of a sudden.. what do you say now? what will jeongin say now? should you just leave the chat and block everyone? oh and change school!!

Seungmin: damn she died. Minho: ikr.. its been 10 minutes already- Chan: just leave her alone.. i guess she is still shocked- Hyunjin: she choose me over innie.. WHATEVER i love my maknae too! My two babys together would be double baby attack! Jeongin: hyung.. Felix: no but you shouldve told her its the wrong chat- Jisung: she shouldve been careful… and also- if i would this would still keep going. Felix: ye but its kinda rude.. Changbin: Poor her!! Chan: Guys lets just not talk in here for a bit- be respectful Seungmin: acting like she actually died now.. You: guys i wanna apologize.. this is really embarrassing right now- and jeongin- i am also sorry.. for acting like a little child Jeongin: No Y/N- its alright.. Hyunjin: no one ever had a crush on jeongin so hes probably happy right now….. Jeongin: hyunjiiin!! Jeongin: no but to make sure- so you ACTUALLY have a crush on me? And THAT is why you were avoiding me? You: Ye- Jeongin: thats kinda stupid.. usually people do everything to be closer to their crushes- and you were doing everything just to not see me. You: funny right- Jeongin: so you like LIKE like me fr? Minho: bro YES You: ye what minho said- Jeongin: someone can actually LIKE like me-? You: yes jeongin- Hyunjin: jeongin i see you typing.. stop typing.. stop asking these useless questions.. Jeongin: man.. what do i say then Jisung: INVITE HER ON A DATE!!! You: JISUNG?! Felix: why not.. that would be cute :3 ! Jeongin: Ye? Seungmin: ye. Jeongin: okey then Y/N- we should actually go on a date.. For you to make up for all the time you were avoiding me!! You: wait like an actual date date..? Minho: YES!! Gosh why are you both so stupid.. JISUNG: SAY YES SAY YES!!! You: wtf ofcourse id say yes!!?? Jeongin: really? Minho: JEONGIN YES!!! No i am seriously leaving.. Jeongin: omg thats insane- You: ikr.. Jisung: now kiss You and Jeongin: JISUNG!!

this is the end-! or atleast of this part- but i cant promise to do another part! only if people would actually want it. and also i want to say sorry for it being written so funny.. its my first ever small story! so please dont judge :>

if you actually like it ! then id be really happy! and i hope i will be able to improve and become better!!

thanks for reading till the end!

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Want a fic thats post-Winner Island where the Hearts manage to get away or its set after Law and Bepo retrieve their crew but either way the haki negating the devil fruit was temporary and the Hearts are still women

The fic would include the typical "wtf is my body" and preparing to go after Blackbeard for revenge/the cure

Here are some great moments to include:

Ikkaku is DELIGHTED in the beginning but by day four she's irritated by all the questions and basically holds a sex ed presentation to explain FAQs

Everyone raiding Ikkaku's closet. Theres TWENTY heart members all her clothes are GONE

Law remembers Penguin & Sachi's joy at the prospect of teasing Law way back in the beginning and he will NOT let it go (Sachi: *is pissed* Law, smirking evil-y: you're cute when you're angry Sachi, experiencing karma: cAPTAIN)

At one point they rob a clothing store. They're joking around with lingerie and super frilly dresses. They rob a bra store the next night sulkily as they all wait their turn for Ikkaku to size them bc last night they didnt try on anything before they stole it and wouldnt stop complaining about how uncomfortable they were all day

Ikkaku walks into the bunk room to see half the crew topless and comparing who has the biggest boobs

The first person to get their period is faced with teasing. Two days later most of the crew is on their period. Law as a doctor INSISTS that synced periods are a myth. No one believes him anymore. Ikkaku holds a second sex ed meeting because no one listened to her presentations on pads and tampons the first time. Anyways that week IS UTTER HELL. Ikkaku keeps throwing painkillers at complainers

The crew ABSOLUTELY 100% thinks just bc they have boobs means they can get free drinks at bars. It quickly becomes a competition. It quickly becomes a problem

Luffy: if you're a woman now do you still have a dick? Law: no Luffy: BLACKBEARD STOLE YOUR DICK

The crew experiencing those moments from puberty when you first notice 1) you cant cross your arms the same way as before 2) you keep knocking your hips into things and bruising them 3) it didnt matter how lose this shirt/pants was before now im wider in certain places and its stretching out

Sanji: OHHH LAW-CHANNNNN Law: for the last time im STILL A MAN i just happen to have tits now

Theyd absolutely get stuck in bras bc they dont know how to use them. They werent using them at first but like its OP they all have huge boobs and can only go so long without support

Law having to retrain himself because his balance and strength have been re-proportioned (Law: im a woman now, im weaker. I'll never be as strong as a man! Zoro: not this bullshit again)

Penguin: if this doesnt work do you think Captain can give us bottom surgery? Law, in his room, struggling to get out of a bra: *contemplating preforming top surgery with his sword right tf now*

The updated bounty posters

[totallynotpochacco]

ask, and ye shall receive 🙇🙇🙇

if u take multiple characters, may i request naib, ithaqua, and alva with an s/o whos a kleptomaniac? if u dont do multiple chars, maybe just alva if thats ok!

much loves 💞💞💞

please read🔻

This.. has been rotting in my inbox since the start and I am so sorry. Usually I’m trying to find motivation for all of these writings but things came up yesterday and I just needed to write something to make me feel better. So this was more self indulgent. I would love to write for Alva but I fear I don’t have a good concept of him yet. Also Kinktober stuff will be posted in the near future. There will be a part two of this with Ithaqua, I think? not proofread and not great-

Naib with a kleptomaniac s/o! —————————————————————-

He’s got a massive safe, with all of his stuff in it and you don’t have the code.

No I’m kidding,

Well, sorta.

He keeps his room clean anyways so there’s nothing to really take other than a few pencils, coins, or wrappers of leftover food.

He does keep a hidden snack drawer that’s filled to the brim with all kinds of stuff and he can tell if you’ve been in there. Even if one thing is gone.

Naib had taken you to his room a few hours ago, just so he could be near you. No need for talking when your presence is enough. Which brings us to now, where you were chilling on his beanbag chair with a book that you stole from Joseph’s office. Naib had quietly grunted to signal to you, then gestured to the door that he’ll be back. You nodded and went to go read as he shut the door.

Perfect.

Now was your time to strike. The feeling had been itching away at you ever since you got there. You just had too. It’s not like you could control it anyways. So you crept over to his snack drawer in the bottom of his desk. And picked out a.. large almond joy? (I’m so sorry I’ve been craving fucking almond joys for like weeks so.. you get almond joys.)

Oh well, they were good anyways. Especially frozen, to get that crunch! You place the sugary treat into a pocket that’s least likely to smush it or melt it. Closing the drawer you slip back into your spot, pick up your book, and continue like nothing happened. And that’s when the door opened again, Naib coming back with.. more food? A family sized bag of potato chips to be exact. You roll your eyes and let out a small huff to conceal your want to laugh. He was a strong guy, always working out, burning calories, so eating like this was reasonable, you thought. When he walks over to his snack drawer pulling out a Twix to eat with his chips, he nods to you, politely gesturing again if you wanted some. Which was another way to tell you he loves you, because there was no way he was sharing with anyone else.

You decline, because chips? No, the almond joy. Which means you had to escape, and quick before he finds out.

You stand up, stretching like you’ve been sitting for too long, and grab your jacket off the back of his chair. Turning to him, to say, “Nah, no thanks. I think I’ll wait till dinner to eat. But I’m gonna head out now, see if Victor has any mail for me.”

Naib nods, and stands by the door watching you start to leave. When he suddenly asks, “Did you go in my snack drawer?”

You pause and turn to him, internally “wtf?”-ing. With a shake of your head you lie. “No? Why?”

Naib fixes his hood, looking you up and down for anything out of place. “Dunno, just seemed like there was less than before.”

You glance at the drawer and shrug, trying to play it cool. You really had to go. “I don’t know what to tell you, I really didn’t take anything.”

Naib nods and lets you go for now. Choosing to believe you. Which was great for you, slipping out of his room and shutting the door quietly. Quickly walking away.

You were halfway down the hallway when you heard a door slam open and naib yell,

“MY ALMOND JOY-”

Fuck. ———————————————————————-

I kinda rushed this, it’s not great. Haven’t been feeling well lately, but when am I ever. I’ll try to do better next time, I promise.