#WHEN I SAY SHOTGUN YOU SAY WEDDING

[swallowyourgods]

give me envy give me malice give! me! your! attention!

[0nly-fear]

Names

Every little girl dreams of getting married. Of her one day in the sun where she is the most important girl in the world. When she finally is viewed as sucsessful by her friends and family and takes his name.

But names matter, don't they darling?

I will not give mine away to just any random whore so easily. And as you are now isn't good enough. Prove to me you are worth it. Let me corrupt you into being my own personal cocksleeve; that's all a woman is after all. Let me mold you into the object that I deem worthy of my desire. Us? We? Ours? No.... I. Me. Mine. Tears of joy at the alter? Wong again, darling. You are signing your life, everything you are, over to me completely. I will have cries of terror. You will sob and wretch as you accept the role you were forced into. That I forced upon you. Your tears will ruin the hours of meticulous work to make you perfect in front of everyone you've ever even barely respected.

And you will be all the more brilliantly beautiful for it.

Only then will I finally grant you your oldest and deepest desires. I will wipe away the last vestiges of the old "you" that person, that thing that no longer exists. I will prove to the world you chose to submit to me, you chose to abandon any pride you had for your family name just for the opportunity to finally have mine.

Yet, that isnt quite right, is it dear?

That name you currently use isn't worthy of mine. It is used; broken and worthless. A memory of the failure you were before me. Don't worry, I will decide upon new one for you. You don't mind, do you Ami? Who's going to complain, your mother? You decided to let me replace her family name with mine the first time you spread your legs for me like the good little whore you are. Why then, would she care about your first name?

Oh, you don't like that name? Hahahaha. I don't care.

Whatever name I give you will be better than the one you used to have. I like it, its cute and silly and diminutive. It fits you.

Oh? Your witness will stop it?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

You're so completely adorable when you're desperate.

The maid of honnor -your best friend- sold you for a two dollar raise. She already signed the license with your new name, Ami. I warned you all your friends were cunts. But of course, the failure that you were, you didnt belive me. Now you will finally realize I am the only one able to see your value.

Shhhh Ami, dont cry. You will forget your old name along with all the trauma, all the disappointment and failure behind it. Save those tears for tomorrow.

You'll need them.

[archersgoon]

i know i'm making shit up wholecloth here but the august-abian-perri dynamic is soso real to me like they had that shit going for months & then a&a got married and they all stopped doing the toxic besties thing for 20 years. but you still see the echoes

[vivwritesfics]

Family

Her family doesn't like Tyler and, as a result, haven't been in her life for quite some time. But with a baby on the way, she gives them one last chance.

Warnings: angst and toxic parents

Even after all these years, Tyler Owens still loved watching the weather. He stood on the porch as he watched dark clouds move in. Just some rain, not enough for a storm.

"Ty," came his wife's voice. Hand on her swollen stomach, she locked the front door and walked towards him, slipping the house keys into his pocket.

Immediately, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tight against him. His lips met the top of her head. "Ready to go?" He asked, his raspy voice a reminder of just how early in the morning it is.

She nodded as she wrapped her arms around his neck, leaning against him. It was one of their pre-chasing rituals. Both of them would have given anything to be chasing right now.

Taking her hand, Tyler led her own to the truck. He'd spent the last six months looking for a more practical car, but he wasn't giving up his truck for the world.

He helped her into the passenger seat. Any day now, she was going to pop, he thought as he looked at her stomach. And then he'd have that precious baby boy, the thing that tied him to her forever, in his arms.

Chase Owens. The name was easy to pick once they found out they were having a boy. Kate laughed, but Boone was one hundred percent on board.

Tyler pulled out of the driveway. "How're we feeling, mama?" He asked as his hand settled in her thigh.

She squeezed her legs around him, holding him there. "Terrified," she and and swallowed thickly.

It was a terrifying situation. Her parents had put up with her relationship with the young, hotshot bull rider until he disappeared, ran off to college. They thought that would be the end of it.

But six years had passed. Six years since Tyler came back from college, six years since they started chasing together, six years since she last spoke to her parents.

And here she was, driving to make amends before the baby was born, to give her little boy a shot at knowing his grandparents.

Tyler freed his hand from the death like grip her thighs had on him. He took one of her hands off of her stomach and brought it up to his lips, kissing the back of it. "Everything's gonna be fine," he tried to reassure her, but it was doing very little to actually reassure her.

She knew what he was trying to say. That she had him and Chase. And, if her parents didn't want to know, then it was their loss. They would be the ones not meeting their grandson, they would be the ones not having a relationship with him.

With her head against the headrest, she turned to look at get husband. "I love you," she whispered.

That was the other thing: Her parents didn't know they were married. There wasn't much family at their wedding, Tyler's parents and his sister, an aunt and a grandparent. Nobody from her side, nobody even knew she was getting married.

For today, the rings were hidden on chains beneath their clothing. On, but not visible. Her parents wouldn't have been able to handle two bombshells in one day.

It wasn't a long drive, but that just made the feeling worse. They weren't very far, but they hadn't seen each other in four years. There was always a chance they moved and never told her.

Seeing her fathers car still in the driveway, she furiously wiped at her eyes. If she was going to do this, she was going to be strong about it.

Tyler killed the engine and looked at the house. It was just the same as the last time he was there. After college, in his old truck. When he picked her up and they never looked back.

He let out a low whistle. "I wonder if your dad is gonna pull the shotgun on me," he said, adding a quiet 'again' as an after thought.

"I'm not gonna let him," she replied. Sucking in a deep breath, she pushed open the door and stepped out. No waiting for her husband, like she usually did not that she was eight months along.

Tyler was quick to follow. He took her hand, fingers brushing her stomach. Baby Chase gave an almighty kick, almost like he knew it was his father out there.

"We don't have to do this if you don't want to," he whispered, his forehead touching hers.

She looked towards the house. Slight movement in the window indicated that it might have been too late to turn back. "We've got this," she said and kissed him quickly.

Tyler kept his arm around her as she walked up the drive. It was a protective thing, something he did more and more since the positive tests six months ago.

She was the one that knocked.

There was a moment, someone waiting by the front door until a minute had passed, desperate not to seem to eager. But they'd forgotten that she could see through the stained glass panels on the front door just as good as they could.

Her mother pulled open the door. "Darling!" She cried and opened her arms. "Oh, I've missed you!"

She didn't acknowledge the bump as she looked past her daughter, looked at Tyler. Her facial expression grew tight, as it always used to when he was the topic of conversation. "Tyler," she said stiffly.

"Hello, ma'am," Tyler said, smile polite as he pulled his hat from his head.

The tension was already in the air, but there seemed to be little hope for recovery.

Her mother turned back to her, expression once again cheery. "Come in, darling," she said and took her hand, pulling her into the house. Ignoring Tyler completely.

If she could have been unwilling to go into the house, she would have. Tyler followed her in, closing the door behind him. Funny, he didn't think he'd ever entered the house through the front door before. The upstairs window, though, he was very well acquainted with.

Things were tense in the kitchen. Her father had greeted her by the time Tyler walked in, his glare fixed on him.

"Mom, dad," she began and sucked in a breath. "We came here today because we've got some pretty big news." They already knew. They had to, how could they miss her bump?

"I'm sorry, darling," her mother began, feigning sympathy. "But it might be too late to get it fixed. You're gonna have to live with the choices you've made."

What in the actual fuck? She stumbled back as if she had been slapped, Tyler easily steadying her. "That's not why we're here," he said, hand settling on her bump.

"Well, you're not seeing any money from us!" Her father barked. "Not a cent! Not for you or that bastard child you knocked my poor daughter up with!"

They should have expected this, shouldn't they? This level of hostility from her parents. It still hurt, but it stung less than it would have six years ago.

She took in a steadying breath. "Actually, we came here because we wanted you to be in out baby's life, but you can forget it," she said and turned on her heel.

Tyler followed her out of the house. Her parents didn't try to follow. That bridge had been destroyed and there was no chance of rebuilding.

She didn't cry on the drive back to the home they shared. No, she was just angry. Angry at her parents, angry at the universe for making things this way.

Tyler pulled into a gas station. Food and gas, that was what they needed. But, before he climbed out of the truck, he paused. "You know, at our wedding Chad and Jake offered to take on the role of grandparents if it was ever needed," he said trying to lighten the mood.

A small smile graced her features. "Chad and Jake? Your thirty year old cousins want to be Chase's grandparents?" She asked through a laugh.

There she was, his girl. Tyler dropped a kiss to her lips. "I'll be right back," he said and set about getting the gas and snacks.

Everything would be okay. Even if her parents had made it pretty clear that they didn't want her. She had Tyler, and soon she'd have baby Chase, too. That was all the family she needed (grandma Chad abd grandma Jake were just a bonus).

[adrienneleclerc]

Hello, darling! 🫶🏻 You could write more about Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader x Alexandra Saint Mleux I don't know maybe you see a second part of "The Happy Throuple"

Hello, querida! So there is already a second part of “The Happy Throuple” and its called "Nobody Everybody Knows", its on my masterlist right next to "The Happy Throuple" so you could go ahead an read that. But here is the third installment of your favorite Throuple

Family Meeting

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader x Alexandra Saint Mleux

Summary: the first time all three sets of parents meet each other.

Warning: spelling and grammatical errors

A/N: I hope everyone is enjoying the happy throuple story, there are many more installments such as a gender reveal party, shopping for the baby, decorating the baby’s room and figuring out a name, having Pascale and Alexandra’s mom host a baby shower, Charles proposing, giving birth to the baby, the classic struggles of being first time parents, the wedding, the baby’s first birthday, the baby’s first trip around the paddock, Leo and the baby being besties, the baby being a toddler, BIG PLANS but I expect everyone to be patient because planning it out does take time. Anything about Alexandra I pure made it up and I am SO UPSET because I had to rewrite the majority of the fanfic because it didn’t fucking save!!

(You know what’s FASCINATING? Becky G, Charles, and Alexandra were probably at the SAME LAKERS GAME!!!!!! My mind is BLOWN)

Y/N has met Alexandra’s parents when her and Alexandra first became roommates. Charles and Alexandra met each other’s parents when they first started dating. However, neither met Y/N’s parents and Y/N hasn’t met Charles’s mom, but she has met his brothers.

So Charles came up with a brilliant plan to fly Y/N’s parents out to Monaco so everyone can meet. Her parents said yes immediately. Charles was already nervous about picking up Y/N’s parents from the Nice Airport, Y/N riding shotgun obviously, she’s 7 weeks pregnant.

“Muñeco, this was your idea, relax.” Y/N said.

“How can I relax? The first time I’m meeting your parents is because I got you pregnant! Screw making good first impression, all your dad is going to see is the man that knocked up his 22 year old daughter.” Charles said, parking the car in the airport parking lot.

“Alexandra is preparing the apartment for our parents, she took Leo out for a walk and gave him a bath, he should be clean and wearing a cute little bow tie.” Y/N said. Both of them got out of the car, Y/N kisses him. “Everything will be fine.” They got out of the car and entered the terminal her parents say they were going to arrive in. “I’m gonna get some Dunkin’ for my mom, you okay to wait here?”

“Yeah of course, mon ange, here’s my card.” Charles said, giving Y/N his credit card. Y/N kissed his cheek before going to Dunkin’ and Charles waited for Y/N's parents to arrive. When Y/N was in line at Dunkin', some people asked for photos with her, same with Charles. Y/N was walking back with an iced coffee in hand and some donuts when her parents arrive with suitcases.

"Ay mija por favor, estás embarazada, no puedes tomar café, ya sabes eso." Her mom scolded her. Please, you’re pregnant, you can’t drink coffee, you know that

"Mami, lo compre para ti." Y/N said. I bought this for you

"Ay gracias, princesa, te quiero mucho." Her mom said, hugging and kissing Y/N on the cheek before taking the coffee. "Presentanos Y/N, no seas maleduducada." Thank you princess, I love you so much. Introduce us, Y/N, don’t be rude

"Mami, Papi, this is Charles Leclerc, my boyfriend." Y/N said.

"Pleasure to meet you." Charles said, leaning in for a hug with Y/N's mom and shaking Y/N's dad's hand.

"Nice to meet you too Charles, I'm Macarena, this is Jorge." Macarena said.

"Y donde esta la flacucha esa?" Jorge asked. Where is she

"Papi! Ella esta en el apartamento, ya vamonos." Y/N scolded her father. Charles helped with the luggage and they got into the biggest car he owned. She’s in the apartment, let’s go

“So how long have you been dating Y/N?” Jorge asked

“About a year.” Charles replied.

“Y la flacucha esa?” Jorge asked again.

“Papi!” Y/N scolded her father.

“Ay perdón! How long have you been dating Alexandra?” Jorge asked.

“A little over a year.” Charles replied.

“And what made you think you yourself ‘you know what, I would like two girlfriends, that’d be great’, hm?” Jorge asked and Macarena hit his shoulder.

“Actually Alexandra was the one that liked Y/N first. Alex would invite Y/N on our shopping trips and when she would leave me alone with Y/N, we would talk and I fell in love. We both fell in love with her.” Charles said, putting his hand on Y/N’s thigh.

“Ah, that’s nice.” Macarena commented. Charles turned on the audio of his car stereo and it was playing on of Y/N’s songs.

“That’s no way you actually have this song on your playlist, muñeco.” Y/N commented in disbelief.

“Of course I do! I have to support my girlfriend, after all.” Charles said and turned up the volume. He drove into this building’s parking garage and parked the car in his spot. Him, Y/N, and her parents got out of the car. “I put you guys in a hotel and I will drop you guys off later tonight, I’m just waiting for a few people..” Charles said and that’s when Charles’s mom and Alexandra’s parents, Mariana and Adrien, pull up in their cars. Pascale got out of her car.

“Charles, whats going on here?” Pascale asked.

“Maman! This is Y/N, my girlfriend, and her parents, Macarena and Jorge.” Charles introduced them. Pascale stepped closer to Y/N.

“It’s lovely to meet you.” Pascale hugged Y/N and Y/N hugged her back.

“It’s lovely to meet you too, Charles adores you.” Y/N commented.

“Ah, entonces es niño de mami.” Jorge commented to his wife and Macarena hit his shoulder again. Oh so he’s a mama’s boy

“No seas malo, Jorge, por Dios,” Macarena said before saying hello to Pascale. Don’t be mean, Jorge, god

“Oh Mariana, Adrien, these are my parents.” Y/N said as soon as Mariana and Adrien got out of their car.

“Hi, nice to meet you.” Adrien said to Jorge.

“You too. How do you feel about your daughter dating Charles?” Jorge asked Adrien.

“He’s a fine young man, perfectly harmless.” Adrien said.

“He got my daughter pregnant so he’s not that harmless.” Jorge commented.

“But they’re in love. My daughter loves your daughter very much, I can guarantee that.” Adrien said.

“That makes me feel better, thank you, man.” Jorge patted Adrien’s back.

“I can’t believe you came from New York, how was the flight?” Mariana asked Macarena.

“It was fine, her son got us first class tickets.” Macarena commented.

“That’s good, it’s a long flight. Charles, Can we go up? I’m getting cold.” Pascale told her son.

“Oh right, of course, let’s go.” Charles said before pressing the elevator button. When the elevator door opened, he held out his arm so everyone can get it before he did and once he was in, he pressed the button for his floor. Once the elevator opened on his floor, Y/N opened the penthouse door.

“Reina, we’re here, I brought Dunkin’.” Y/N said, putting her bag on the couch, and that’s when she heard the tippy tappies of Leo. “Leo! Ay, que cosita tan linda, me extrañaste bebé?” Y/N asked rhetorically as she squatted down to pet the dog before leo runs to Charles. The parents were observing the penthouse and Alexandra came in, greeting Pascale and her parents with a kiss in the cheek before she went over to Y/N parents. What a cute little thing you are, did you miss me, baby

“Hola, soy Alexandra, un placer conocerlos.” Alexandra said, hugging Macarena and Jorge, Hi, I’m alexandra, it’s a pleasure to meet youn

“Un placer conocerte también, flacucha.” Jorge said. Pleasure to meet you too

“Papi!” Y/N yelled.

“No se preocupe, me puedes decir flaca si quieres, no me molesta.” Alexandra said. Don’t worry, you can call me that if you want, I don’t mind

“Está bien flaca. Y cuéntanos, cómo conociste a nuestra hija?” Jorge asked. Tell us, how did you meet our daughter?

“Ah, la conocí en una fiesta. Un chico me estaba pidiendo el número, le dije que no pero me seguía molestando y Y/N vino al rescate.” Alexandra said. I met her at a party. Some guy was asking form,y number, I said no but he kept bothering me and Y/N rescued me

“Si, así es Y/N, siempre defendiendo a la gente. Se hicieron amigas por cuanto?” Macarena asked. Yeah, that’s how Y/N is, always defending people. How long were you two fiends?

“Creo que fuimos amigas por 2 años antes que me empezara a gustar.” Alexandra answered. I think we were friends for 2 years before I started liking her

“Y por qué te empezó a gustar? Como que cambió?” Jorge asked. And when did you start liking her? What changed?

“Ah pues creo que fue cuando empecé a recibir hate por salir con Charles, llamándome una interesada y otras cosas feas. Estaba llorando y ella me estaba consolando, diciendo que nada lo que ellos dicen es cierto, y la empecé de ver de otra manera. Desde ese entonces, todo lo que ella hacía me empezó a gustar. Me gusta como se arregla el cabello, como canta cuando cocina, cositas así. Es guapa, claro, pero es humilde, dulce, inteligente, talentosa, y la admiro mucho.” Alexandra confessed. Oh well I think it happened when I started to receive hate for dating charles, people were calling me a gold digger and other awful,things. I was crying and she comforted me, said that what they’re saying is not true, and I saw her differently. Since that day, I started liking everything she did. I like how she does her hair, how he sings when she’s cooking, stuff like that. She’s hot, of course, but she’s humble, sweet, smart, talented, and I admire her a lot

“Y de Charles?” Macarena asked.

“Yo creo que es mejor que él te lo explique. Mon beau, Macarena and Jorge want to talk to you.” Alexandra said. Charles excused himself from Mariana and Adrien and went to Macarena and Jorge. I think it’s better if he explains it

“Hello, what did you want to talk about?” Charles asked.

“Same thing we asked Alexandra, how did you meet Y/N and when did you start liking her?” Jorge asked,

“Well she was invited to the Miami Grand Prix in 2023 so that’s when I met her, she came to the Ferrari garage and when she spotted Alexandra, they started talking. That’s when they told me they were friends. It wasn’t until we went to this Peruvian restaurant that I started to like her. She was talking about how she went to Peru for this music festival and how her fans were waiting outside the hotel to take photos with her. Then I started sharing my experience with ‘crazed fans’ and it felt good to talk to someone about it. We both suffer from anxiety so she’s been helping me with mine, Alex can’t relate to what I go through but Y/N can,” Charles said.

“She does seem happier on our phone calls.” Macarena said,

“You’re a good guy, charles.” Jorge said. Y/N was with Pascale.

“So Y/N, charles mentioned he met you at a Grand Prix?” Pascale asked.

“Yes, I was invited by one of Ferrari’s sponsors and I got to meet him in the Ferrari garage. It was actually kinda cool, my uncle is a formula 1 fan so when I would go over to his house when I was younger, I would watch the races.” Y/N said.

“That’s nice, dear. What made you like him?” Pascale asked.

“I had this dog charity event, I’m a big animal lover, and he heard me on my phone arguing with the person who was supposed to host with me, saying he wasn’t able to do it anymore and Charles said he would host with me. I asked him why and he said because he wanted to help me and him being there would bring in more people. He wasn’t wrong, a lot of dogs got adopted that day. He’s selfless, humble, so kind, that made me fall in love.” Y/N confessed.

“He’s very in love with you too, he can’t wait to be a father.” Pascale said.

“Yeah, he’s very excited.” Y/N said.

“You seem like a good fit for him Y/N, I hope one day you could come over to our house.” Pascale said.

“I would like that very much.” Y/N said,

The rest of the day, the parents were sitting in the dining room, drinking wine, and sharing embarrassing childhood stories for their children.

“Alexandra flushed her sister’s goldfish down the toilet because she thought it led to the ocean,” Mariana said and everyone was laughing.

“Yeah, that’s enough wine for you.” Alexandra took the wine bottle that was in the center of the table and brought it to the kitchen counter where Y/N and Charles were eating potato chips. “Looks like our parents are getting along.”

“What embarrassing story did you hear this time?” Y/N asked.

“One of mine, actually. It’s crazy how they’re talking like old friends.” Alexandra said.

“It’s even crazier that they’re all cool with us being a throuple, I thought I was going to die.” Charles said

“Well I’m glad you didn’t, muñeco.” Y/N kissed him.

“Think we could stay the night?” Alexandra asked.

“Of course you’re staying the night. I wouldn’t expect anything less.” Charles said. The three observed their parents talking, looks like the family meeting was a success.

The End

Hope y’all liked it! It took me forever to write

[nosesitter]

Wedding Dress.

| father in law! Joel miller

1.8k words

a/n: Not going to lie this seemed longer as I was writing it then the word count hit me in the head like a brick. I’ve missed FIL Joel this isn’t me rushing honestly, this is just what happens when you have good pussy and good personality. The inevitable happens, it’s life.

⚠️: infidelity, recorded sex, mention of onlyfans, one mention of ankle kissing(don’t worry no feet stuff),pussy drunk Joel milller 🫶🏻, fingering, pet names(darling, baby, beautiful bride), squirting (it’s a common theme), unprotected p in v, and one unreciprocated I love you.

“Could I fuck you in your wedding dress?”

It sits in a box in the back of your closet. A white box wrapped in a white bow that’s barely gathered any dust. Your wedding dress. It’s only been a couple years but it should still fit. Walker is out for the weekend, work conference. He’s been working so hard to make sure you maintain your housewife status and you’re grateful for that.

Joel had texted you a couple days ago asking for a peculiar request. Could he fuck you in your wedding dress. At first you were hesitant. Your dress was special to you — it obviously held sentimental value but how can you say no? So here you are searching for the white lingerie you wore on your wedding night to wear underneath your wedding dress.

You can’t help but remember what it was like seeing Joel on your wedding day. A scruffy, everyday man who barely wore a smile on his face but now there he was standing outside the church —in a crisp white shirt, fitting black slacks that hugged his ass and prominent bulge, trying to navigate the people inside.

Even with the limo windows tinted he could see you behind the glass. Hair pulled up, the few pieces falling out the bun accenting your face, glossed lips pressed together. As beautiful as you looked that day all he could think about was the honeymoon you’d have. Getting railed for a week straight in a beautiful cabana, overlooking the beach.

He can’t deny he was a tad jealous. Having a shotgun wedding with Walkers mother, because she became pregnant pretty quick into their relationship and this was back in the day when you needed to be wed first to have a child. So you couldn’t blame Joel for his perverse decision of wanting to bang his beautiful bride.

—

You had about thirty minutes before Joel came home, his home. The place you were staying at for the weekend. In his guest room you had set up everything you needed. Your dress laid out on the navy bedspread, your makeup and hair done just like it was two years ago. And in the next room, Joel’s room, the camera. Ready and set up to capture the entirety of the sick perverted act the two of you were ready to commit.

As you finished zipping up the dress you could hear his truck pull up. Nervousness setting it just like you were outside of the church again, ready to face the man you’d see everyday for the rest of your life. Just outside his own front door, sun kissed skin from working hard outside, the smell of his musk and faded cologne you saw him put on this morning before he left and his hands, dirty with the day he had, ready to grab and stain the porcelain white lace you were wearing.

Your right hand reached to your left to twist off the wedding ring and set it on the kitchen counter. You were ready for Joel and he was ready for you.

Front door opening up this was it, no going back now. Crossing the threshold his eyes couldn’t break away from the most beautiful bride he’s ever had the pleasure of seeing twice now.

“I must’ve died and gone to heaven, darlin’, dropping whatever he had in his hands on the coffee table, Joel beelines over to you. His hands shaky with nerves. His kiss is powerful against you, glossy lips sticking to his, he can’t help but pull away and savor the vanilla flavor now stained on him.

“I can’t deny the request of such a hard working, handsome man. So after some thought I decided yes, you can fuck me in my dress.” His rough hands grab both sides of your face pulling you back close to him to seal the deal. Your hands grabbing each button trying to pry his shirt off him. Hands touching his hot skin. Once his shirt was off he wanted to move this to the bedroom.

“Not to be corny but,” he kneels down and put one of his strong arms behind your knees sweeping you up and into his arms. Your hands come to his neck as you hold on, giggling like crazy as he walks the two of you to the bedroom.

He sets you down on the edge of his bed, his head turns to notice the camera. He walks over and switches it on, the little red light coming alive to record the act. Joel comes back to you, kneeling down grabbing your foot to slowly remove the white heels you’re wearing.

“You look like a princess. So gorgeous.” Your face is hot and there’s no doubt a blush on your cheeks. Pulling your ankle close to your face he gives it light kisses, slowly working his way up under your dress. His thick fingers grab at the white garter pulling it forward and snapping it back against your skin. His beard scratches at your leg as he bites onto the lace and pulls it down your leg and out from under the dress.

The garter rests between his teeth as he grabs your hands pulling you back up to stand infront of him. He turns you around and starts to unzip the dress. Pushing the dress shoulders slowly off, his nose trailing down your neck, inhaling your scent. Things feel different this time. He wasn’t ravaging you the way he had been for a month now. He was taking his time, taking you in. Enjoying himself and you.

“Joel please,” you felt breathless, his fingers scratching at the nape of your neck grabbing the bun you had your hair in. Teeth sinking into your shoulder as your dress puddles onto the floor. A bundle of white lace sitting atop his dirty work boots.

“When you left for your honeymoon all I could think about was you getting fucked day in and day out on a beach.” His hand coming around your front to feel the tightened corset, pretty white panties with a pretty bow right above your pussy.

He’s not completely wrong. Walker bent you over anything that was bolted into the ground. It’s when you started your onlyfans. Recording a video of you giving him head then riding him on a private beach. Walker loved it, loved the wild woman you are. Walker loved you.

You turn quick to face Joel. Finally worried that this is going to far but he’s quick to push you back on the bed crawling up between your legs. He looks like a cartoon wolf, tongue falling out, eyes with hearts in them as he was practically drooling over your clothed cunt.

He wants to rip the lace and dive his tongue right in but he refrains from that and just begins to suck the wetness from the cloth. His tongue pushing through the barrier right against you. He was going to savor this. He wanted to remember this. As sick as this sounds he wants to imagine him fucking you on your honeymoon.

Your hands grab at the salt and pepper curls as you slowly try to grind up into his face. Clit rubbing against his prominent nose it sends goosebumps all over your body.

“Please baby, don’t tease.” As you try to wiggle out of your panties, hips grinding against the bed as they begin to slip down. Joel’s quick to slap your thigh with his large palm.

“Stop that squirmin’! Lemme enjoy this darlin’.” Pussy drunk Joel had his accent coming out more than usual. But he obliges you and slips the panties off. Pushing you further up the bed he lays on his stomach to enjoy himself more. Cock bulging through the zipper he grinds it into the mattress. As much as he wants to just fuck you and bust in you he just pushes two fingers into you. His saliva, your wetness create a squelch that makes Joel smile big between your thighs as his tongue kitten licks your clit.

“You made me an amazing lunch baby. Thank you, but all I could think about was the dessert, this dessert. Sweet-sweet cunt served so beautifully.” Sucking at the bud his fingers push inside of you faster. Moans getting louder you can’t help but chant his name as your stomach tightens. You can feel your orgasm coming, and it’s coming quick.

Adding another finger in Joel seems determined to make you squirt. Hands release from his hair worried that you’ll pull it out and just yank at the comforter underneath you.

“Baby look at me.” Deep brown eyes, practically black are all you see. His bottom lip is between his teeth. He wants to watch your face as you fall apart under him. His hips grinding against the mattress. He’s a mess of a man. You might be about to cum but so is he just from watching you. The coil inside you snaps, the sound of liquid splashing against his hand has you throwing your head back into the bed as he keeps pumping his fingers inside you having you spray everywhere. Quickly he removes his fingers not giving you a moments rest as he shuffles onto his knees and grabs at his own belt.

Grabbing your thighs he pulls you closer to him and pushes himself inside of you. Fucking you missionary has to be the most intimate position so far for the two of you. Joel leans down arms resting by your head as he pushes the hairs sticking to your face back.

“My beautiful bride, the most wonderful woman.” As good as this feels Joel’s losing himself in you and you know it. Worried for anything else he might say you pull him deep into a kiss, tasting yourself and vanilla lipgloss all across his lips.

Headboard smacking repeatedly against the wall, Joel’s creating a rhythm between your hips with each snap of his. Your legs wrap around his waist pulling him in deeper. Joel breaks away from the kiss and moans. He straight up moans, and it’s loud. No shame in the pleasure your tight fluttering hole is giving him.

“Ah, I’m going to cum!” His eyes shut, his mouth falls open and he’s in pure ecstasy as he shoots ropes of his seed into you. Your arms wrap around his neck, a layer of sweat all over his body as he twitch’s above you, slowing down his thrusts. His arms falling from their position to full engulf you with his body.

Not wanting to crush you he wraps his arms around you and rolls over pulling you with him. Now that you’re on top Joel’s completely relaxed. He’s in nirvana as you just lay together in a comfortable silence. Your head resting against his chest listening to his rapid heartbeat slowly regulate. His hand strokes your hair that’s fallen out of its neat bun. His breaths get deeper as he drifts asleep right under you.

“Love you darlin’. “ and there it is. That’s what you were worried about. Sex is no longer the fun thing the two of you were just doing. Joel’s in love. He’s in love with his daughter in law.

[tarjapearce]

I need to know how ranchero Miguel convinced the parents to let him marry their daughter. Was it a shotgun wedding? 👀

Indeed 👀. Bit of Drama and slight angst under the cut.

-------

You had woken up nauseous and dizzy, for the third time in a row. Your mother was concerned. Had something made you sick? She was stricter with the kitchen staff to be more careful. But upon the wafting smell of your usual morning soup, an egg drop soup, entered your room, you retched on the bathroom, again.

You paled.

When was the last time your period came? It was hard to keep tabs when you were trying to attend other business and try to not die in the process. Two months and counting. You barely had the chance of seeing Miguel as well, since he had his own good share of work in the barn.

And he was the last and only man you have been with. Your hands went around your tummy and tears were in the verge of spilling. You were pregnant.

God, you were so scared. You knew how your parents thought of him, and for all you knew, they still thought you were pure.

But as things were going sooner or later They'd find out, probably kick him out and you'd be forced to marry a guy that looked like him to make pass the child as his. The thought scared you shitless, so you washed your mouth, bathed, got dressed and went to him.

He was talking with the foreman of another estate, but excused himself upon seeing you.

His smile faltered when you approached, solemn look, and red nose by the constant sniffling.

"Hey, hey. Come here. ¿Qué le pasa a mi chula?" (What's wrong with you, gorgeous?)

You whimpered and buried your face in his chest. He held you tightly.

"You mom got you on another date?" He rolled his eyes and you shook your head.

"Your dad tried to sell Luis again?" Another shake of your head.

"Then what is it? You gotta tell me,princesa."

"I..." You hiccuped, "I think I'm pregnant."

You could feel him tense and he made you look at him. You thought he'd be angry but the shine in his eyes proved you otherwise.

"¿Voy a ser papá?" He questioned with a excited yet strained voice. You just stared at him and he kissed you, deeply (Am I gonna be a dad?)

"¡Me vas a hacer papá!" (You're making me a dad!)

He was happy and you broke down.

"Why are you crying? Aren't you excited?"

"I am but... Dad will kick you out and... and.. -" You hiccuped and he just held you with a smile.

" Ps, que me eche. I've got my own home anyways. And if... things get bad, you'll come with me. Okay?" He squeezed you tightly and grunted happily, "Dios te vas a ver preciosa con esa panza toda grandota y redonda. Te voy a cuidar, vas a ser mi reina. Ya vas a ver."

(He can do that.) (God, you'll look gorgeous with that big and round belly. Imma take care of you, you'll be my queen. You'll see.)

He just kept rambling things you couldn't understand, but seeing him giddy made your aching heart to relax.

"I'll talk to him. I... Le voy a pedir tu mano." (Imma ask him your hand in marriage)

"W-What? are you sure of it? I mean, I don't want you getting hurt. He might look like an old man but... he knows his tricks.

"Your mother is the one that I'm concerned about."

And he was right.

"ABSOLUTELY NO." She had protested, the staff had been hiding behind the doors, listening to the scene unfold.

"How dare you asking for such thing!"

"Mom-"

"No. Who do you think you are?! Of course you won't marry her! She's set for better things!"

Miguel's eyes narrowed and your heart stopped with sudden rage.

"I want him!" You stood up, stomping your hands on the table.

"I'm old enough to decide on my own, Mom. I... I love Miguel." With every word that spilled from your mouth, she held her heart as your dad just pinched his nose bridge. He had been silent the whole talk, just glaring holes at Miguel.

"Good lord... Just... Imagine the scandal, the people... What would they say about you?! About us?!"

"They already talk shit under our nose, mom. Their opinion is irrelevant. None really approaches us if it's not for a favor."

"You... you brat!"

"I'm pregnant."

Miguel stood to calm you down as the fight kept rising. Your dad immediately straightened up and looked at Miguel.

"You." His voice venomous, but calm, "And you." He pointed at you.

"Tomorrow at church. 8 am."

"You can't be serious! You'll wed them?!

"Your yelling won't make her less pregnant. And I rather have them wedded than having an off marriage child. A sin." Your dad mumbled and looked at you, your rage seemed to be consuming you by how they spoke of your future child. Miguel's expression hardened, a low growl emanating from him.

"Once you're married, I want you both out of my property, got it?"

"Fine! I didn't want to spent my life being a fucking trophy wife for some rich man I barely know."

You were wedded, and despite your dad underlying sadness, and he wanting to swallow his words back, pride didn't allow him to speak and ask you to stay. Your mother didn't even look at your way.

Miguel had packed your things and put them on his truck. You left to a new life with him and your future family.

[reiderwriter]

The Thought of You Leaves Me Weak 🎰

Chapter 2 of That's What You Get

Prev Chapter || Next Chapter

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female Reader

Genre: Fluff, suggestive.

Word count: 4.8k

Summary: Pushing through your hangovers, you and Spencer retrace your steps from the night before to see if your shotgun Vegas marriage is legal - and find out some extra personal things along the way.

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, mentions of sex, author has a pronounced disinterest in the reality of getting an annulment for a Vegas wedding.

A/N: We're here! Part two! We're still stuck in Vegas for now, but they'll be back to their new normal soon, and now they have a time limit~ Thanks to everyone who liked, reblogged, commented on and signed up for the series taglist from my first post, I hope you all enjoy part two just as much!! Let me know what you think in the comments or over an ask, I'll be replying all weekend :) Here's the taglist link for anyone else who wants to sign up!

Requests are open as well, and you can find some more of my work in my masterlist.

After the initial shock wore off, and the hangover was left to permeate a bit, you and Spencer remembered you were actually FBI agents and had the ability to do something about your predicament.

“I should probably head off to my own room now,” you said pulling yourself out of Spencer’s arms. “Freshen up a bit before we head out to see what’s going on.”

“Oh, yeah, sure.” He nodded, then continued. “You know our first stop should probably be the Marriage License Bureau of Las Vegas. If we are legally married, we’d have had to have obtained a marriage licence between 8am and 12am yesterday, they don’t open later than that.”

“Sounds like a plan.” You nodded to him, “Would they even have served us the marriage licence if we were as intoxicated as I think we were?”

“This is Vegas, Y/N. All we’d need is a valid form of ID and to be willing, and we’d have to have been carrying the ID to get into the bars.” You raked a hand through your hair. Of course you had to get married in a shotgun ceremony in the only state where it probably didn’t matter what your alcohol intake had been.

“Well, we were obviously both willing.” You say, gesturing to the bed, and then curse yourself inwardly as you see the downturned look on Reid’s face. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

“No, it’s okay. You’re right, I wouldn’t have handcuffed you without at least verbal consent.” He replied, pulling a shirt on finally.

“Right,” you let that revelation sit between the two of you, as he turns his back, continuing to get himself ready for the rest of the day. If you were honest with yourself, you’d have admitted to always having an attraction to your coworker, but nothing you’d solidly act on. Yeah, he was beautiful, and you’d enjoyed joining in the teasing everytime Morgan had called him a pretty boy, because he was. But you’d never let your thoughts drift to what he might be like in bed, and now you were regretting that because you had nothing to base your theories of the last night on except that you’d woken up in handcuffs.

Really, if someone had asked you the question about what you could possibly expect from Spencer Reid in the bedroom, the furthest you’d be able to imagine was some incredibly professional, missionary sex. If you thought a little harder, you’d remember that the man had once highlighted his distinct lack of “alpha-male” qualities on a case once, so, really, if anyone was going to be locked up in handcuffs, surely it would’ve been him.

You try to shake that mental picture from your head, but doing so just aggravates your headache, so you have to sit with the image of Spencer Reid tying you up and making you beg.

“You okay, Y/N? You look a bit pale,” he looks a little bit concerned for you when he finally turns back, and you can only imagine the look on your face if you’re eliciting that much concern.

“Yeah, yeah, totally fine, nothing’s wrong. Why are you asking?” you stutter out.

“Because you said you were going to shower five minutes ago, and you haven’t really moved all that much in that time.” You curse yourself again, and you force yourself out of your head.

“Oh! Yeah!” you move off towards the door, grabbing everything you’ve left in a trail to the door, retracing your steps from the night before. “I’ll meet you in the lobby in like twenty minutes?” You didn’t even wait for his reply before pushing the door open and sprinting to your room, not even caring that you hadn’t put your shoes on.

–X–

If you couldn’t be trusted to make simple choices when drunk, such as the choice to not be married to your coworker, you probably also couldn’t be trusted to make simple choices when hungover, such as a place to meet your now husband where the rest of your friends wouldn’t see you in your post-sex haze from the night before.

Which is how you found yourself cowering behind a plant in the lobby desperate to avoid being spotted by Agents Rossi and Hotchner who apparently were up and in suits for some godforsaken reason. You tried to get Reid on the phone, but he wasn’t picking up, and you had a flash of him asking you how to put his phone on silent mode from the night before hit you like a tonne of bricks.

“Shit, shit.” Nothing else useful came out of you though, so behind the plant you were waiting for them to approach the elevators so you could continue as planned. While you were in the bathroom, you’d finally noticed the blooming bruises running up the length of your neck, and you found yourself slightly impressed by Reid once again.

He’d managed to tie you up but still pay that much attention to you, and you were equal parts cursing him and desperately hoping the memories would come back to see just what other secrets he was hiding behind that unassuming frame. With the lack of contraception, you really couldn’t be sure that the two of you had had sex in the traditional sense, but you certainly seemed to have had some fun last night, and not being able to remember drove you insane.

Thankfully, the two agents made their way to the elevator without noticing you, and you let out a breath of relief as soon as the elevator dinged, ready to take them as far away from you as you needed. Unfortunately, once again, anytime fate dealt you one good hand, it followed it up with the worst ever, and as the elevator doors opened, there was Reid. You made a mental note to check your bank balance after this, sure that if you had ended up gambling with Reid, you’d most likely bankrupted yourself with this luck.

“Reid, good morning,” Hotch greeted him, and even from your unconventional perch, you could hear the panic in the younger man's voice as he began struggling for excuses to answer questions that hadn’t even been asked yet.

“Hotchner, Rossi, what are you doing here? Well I know what you’re doing here, you’re waiting for an elevator, and I know what you’re doing in the hotel because we’re all here in the hotel, but I mean what are you doing? In general?” It was almost as if he were asking himself that question at the end, trying to work out why the words were even leaving his mouth.

You couldn’t swoop in and save him without the others seeing your new necklace of hickeys and handprints, so you just had to watch him combust adorably in front of the two seasoned FBI Agents.

“Calm down, kid, don’t pull a muscle in that brain of yours, it’s a highly valuable FBI asset.” Rossi joked with him as they switched places, Rossi and Hotch going into the elevator and Reid slinking out.

“Dave and I just finished breakfast. I’m afraid you may have just missed it, Spencer, but there’s a buffet on the third floor that’s supposedly open all day.” Hotch said.

“Actually, I think food isn’t a great idea for me right now.”

“Oh, wild night, kid? No, wait, let me guess, you tracked down a Star Wars convention?”

“I’m more of a fan of Star Trek myself, you know the technology they appeared to have on screen in the show is really fascinating in that it’s-”

“Oh, how unfortunate, door’s closing. See you later, kid.” You breathed a sigh of relief as you watched the elevator climb up to the higher floors of the accommodation and left your perching spot.

“Spencer, over here.” You waved to him a little, and he turned to the sound of your voice, visually relaxing the moment he set his eyes on you.

“You don’t think they noticed I’m acting weird, right?”

“Reid, everytime you mention anything remotely pop-culture-y to Rossi he does his best to erase the conversation from his brain, okay? And Hotch looks like he hasn't slept in a decade. I’m sure they didn’t notice anything.”

“What? I thought Rossi loved our talks, he always says that I’m a riveting conversationalist.”

You just nodded along with him and patted his arm pitifully, leading him out of the lobby and into the waiting streets of Las Vegas, Nevada.

–X–

Twenty minutes later, you were sitting outside of the Marriage License Bureau, waiting to see if your fate was sealed.

“Okay, so what’s our strategy?” you asked, removing your seatbelt and moved to open your door, jumping out of the SUV you’d commandeered from the parking garage.

“Strategy? Why do we need a strategy?” Reid joined you quickly, exiting from the passenger side, satchel in hand.

“Well, I mean, what are we going to ask them, what are we going to do when we’ve found out if this is real or a hoax or not.”

“Y/N, I think you’re overthinking this. This is Nevada, I’m sure they’re used to any questions we might have.” You took a deep breath looking at the doors of the building and tried to rationalise your thoughts. You were going to be fine, it’s just a marriage, nothing too big.

Pushing the doors open, you were floored by the sheer amount of couples on the premises.

“Shit.” You’d cursed more in the last four hours than you had in the last year, almost beginning to worry that it was becoming a habit.

“Please take a number and wait for your turn to be called, our current waiting time is three and a half hours. If you leave the premises at any point, your place will be forfeited,” a bored looking worker with a small microphone called over the crowd as you entered.

“Hi, sorry, is there a help desk of some kind?” you approached and asked her, a sinking feeling growing in your gut. “We just need to see if our wedding licence is valid.”

“Then please take a ticket, and we’ll see you soon.” The other woman replied, frustratingly monotone.

“No, you don’t understand, we’re leaving the state in three hours, we can’t just sit around, we need answers now, legal advice, something.”

“I’m sorry ma’am, but if you continue to speak to our staff members in that aggressive way, I’m going to have to ask you to leave the premises,” another member of staff now joined the first.

“Aggressive? I am not aggressive,” you said but you could hear the agitation in your own voice, and the tightness in your shoulders.

“What she means to say,” said Reid from behind you, dropping a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Is that we are FBI agents, leaving town on another case soon, and we would really appreciate your cooperation? I have our marriage licence here. If you could just look over it, it’d only take a few seconds of your time.” The tension rolled off of you in waves, and you melted into his touch as he gladly stepped up to continue your communication.

“Okay, yeah, that definitely seems like a legit licence. You FBI agents, you say?” the first woman questions you, and not trusting yourself not to reply passive aggressively and ruin her cooperative mood, you bite your tongue and just nod.

“My coworker who worked the graveyard shift yesterday mentioned we had a few of you come through. Congratulations on your marriage.” She handed the licence back to you and the pit in the bottom of your stomach grew.

“Is your colleague still here? We just had a few questions about some logistics. We’re out of state, you know?” Reid smiled and you were so thankful for him, for the comforting hand he’d trailed down your shoulder and rested at the small of your back as you stood fidgeting next to him. It took you a minute to realise you were playing with your new wedding ring, already so used to it being there on your finger that you hardly noticed its presence.

“Her next shift starts at 12, but if you’re as desperate for information as I think you are, I’ll have her come see you when she comes in. She’s usually five minutes early anyways.” Reid thanked the woman, and fifteen minutes later, a younger woman with a bright smile was greeting you in the lobby and leading you to a private room in the back.

“Doctor and Mrs. Reid, welcome back! Sandy said you had some follow up questions after yesterday?” she greeted you, and your head started pounding again.

“You remember us?” Reid asked, the confusion knitting his brow as he walked ahead of you.

“I don’t tend to forget husbands as handsome and romantic as you, Doctor.” Something flared in your gut then, anger or protectiveness, but it felt green and red, and you pulled Reid’s hand into your own as she guided you to sit at the table at the far side of the room.

“We’re looking to fill in some gaps in our memory from last night,” you spoke, now not caring to hold back any annoyance in your voice. This woman had written out your marriage licence and yet here she was flirting with your husband. With your Reid. With Reid. Again, the curses jumped to your tongue.

“Ah, I see. One of those.” She shot a smile at Reid, and you shot a look at him as well, but he looked oblivious at her interest and you caught yourself letting out a sigh of relief before turning back to the woman.

“You didn’t realise we were drunk?” you asked her.

“Oh no, we realised. We just assumed you were finally taking the plunge after everything you said. And everything you did, too.”

“Everything we did?” you pushed out, your voice ten times higher than usual. You coughed to make it seem like your throat was just dry, not also housing your entire heart.

“You don’t remember? You two looked so in love. You were all over each other, kissing, touching, whispering and giggling. Honestly, it was just nice to have a couple in love here at 11pm that weren’t trying to have sex in the waiting area.” The blush crept up your neck, and you tried your best to force it back down. Obviously, it didn’t work.

You were about to ask another question, probably about how you would go about getting an annulment, when she finally continued.

“And then when you got the licence you were so happy and you called your friends to come and celebrate with you. You asked for the nearest chapel and we have all that information out in the hall and you said your friends were going to come meet you, so you took off.” She shrugged a little, taking a swig from her coffee. You couldn’t help but feel that even after all of that, she was still eyeing up Spencer, so you squeezed his hand a little bit harder at that, your other hand gravitating to his bicep too, your entire body leaning into his.

“Friends?” Spencer was the first one to wake up to that statement, and your agitation reached its peak.

“Yeah, the two teammates you mentioned. You told everyone they were meeting you at the chapel, that you’d all been here working a case and they were the two that responded to your calls that night.”

“Did we mention any names?” you asked.

“No, just that they were FBI Agents. Is there something wrong?”

–X–

You threw the doors of the building open as you gasped for air, the panic fully setting in now.

“Y/N, wait,” Spencer yelled after you, following you onto the pavement. You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes as you tugged on your hair, mindlessly fretting with it, unconscious to the pain. He finally reached you and pulled your hands into his, forcing you to look up into his eyes.

“Y/N, it’s fine. We’re going to be fine.” He soothed you quickly, and you hiccuped through the small sobs you were now letting out.

“Spencer, two of our friends know that we got married last night, and we don’t know who or how much they know, and now we know that our marriage is legal and you’re stuck with me and I got us into all this mess because I’m an adult who doesn’t want to tell her mom to back off.” By the end of your speech he was cradling your head in his hands, as your tears flowed down your face in messy trails.

“Hey, look at me. You told me this morning that this was not my fault, and I’m telling you now that that doesn't mean it's yours. We’re in this together, okay?” he waited for you to nod before continuing. “Besides, no matter who it was, our team mates love us. They’ll understand.”

“What if we get reassigned? This is a conflict of interests, right, me and you working together like this?” You’d worked so hard to be accepted into the BAU, you didn’t want to let this be your exit, and you sure as hell weren’t letting them fire Spencer for it.

“We’ll talk to Hotch and Rossi, they don't want to lose either of us, and if we get this dealt with quick enough, maybe we won't even have to report it. We could keep it quiet for a while, right?” You knew all of his words made sense, they were the best course of action for the two of you. He’d probably run all of the scenarios through his head while you showered this morning, which is why he was so level-headed. But there was a discomfort that you just couldn’t shake.

“You mean we could get this…annulled?” you asked cautiously, looking into his eyes to gauge his reaction.

“If you want, we can walk right back in there and have it done soon, I’m sure that employee would help us, she seemed friendly-”

“No.” You practically shouted, not wanting to come face to face with that woman again, and watch her flirt with Reid as he signed the annulment paperwork. “I mean, there’s no time, right? We should probably head to the chapel to figure out who our witnesses are and then we’re heading back to Quantico.” You did to rationalise your decision, praying that the jealousy (jealousy?) that you felt didn’t show in your voice or face.

“Yeah. Yeah, okay. Well, we have 21 days from now to file, before the annulment period passes and we’re looking at divorce, which is not favourable for either of us, but we can file from out of state.” You nodded along with his words, glad for the lack of questioning, and that he didn’t clock the hopeful glint to your eye.

“Okay, great. Yeah.” You had calmed down enough now for your proximity to become awkward, and Reid noticed as soon as you did, pulling his hands away from you and taking a step back. Maybe it was the hangover, or just the overwhelming series of emotions you’d been through successively, but it felt wrong suddenly having him so far from you. Shaking it off, you grabbed your keys out of your pocket.

“She said we picked up the information about the chapel from the lobby, right? Can we narrow down which one it is with the photo?” You suggested, suddenly not able to meet his eyes.

“Oh, right, yeah. We’d have had to have been able to get there on foot, too. I’ll go and ask them if they recognise which one it is,” he made to move back in, but you shouted a resounding ‘no’ before he could take another step.

“I’ll do it! I should probably apologise for earlier anyway, right?” you chuckled awkwardly, pushing the doors open and leaving him behind with that confused look set against his skin once again.

–X–

“I’m telling you, we delete the footage from the previous day at noon, I can’t help you.” You’d tracked down the chapel pretty quickly despite all of your options, and now found yourself arguing with a pretty lackluster Elvis impersonator, desperate to figure out any more details about the night before.

“What about staff members that could verify? We just need a vague description.”

“Everyone’s a part-timer here, lady. The people on shift today won't be back for another two days or so. Come back then, okay?” He showed you to the door then, and if you hadn’t gotten drunk and married in Vegas the night before, this would certainly have been your lowest moment.

“Nothing?” Reid asked from his perch on the car.

“They delete the security footage.” You signed in frustration, and he showed a sympathetic smile on his face.

“How do you want to play it, then?” he asked. “Two of them are already going to know, should we just come clean to the entire team, see if they could help?”

“No, god no. As much as it’s my current reality, I don’t really want to have to respond to Mrs. Reid until Morgan gets new material, and no one’s going to be this easy of a target any time soon.”

“Technically speaking, you’d have to apply for a legal name change to become Mrs. Reid, usually couples do it a few days either side of the wedding and start the process of updating all their legal IDs so they can travel internationally for honeymoons without anyone asking questions.”

“Not the point, Reid.”

“And I knew that. Sorry.” It was hard to stay annoyed at him with that small smile stretched across his lips, and you suddenly found yourself wondering just exactly how he'd felt against you.

You’d kissed at the chapel, at the wedding licence office, in his hotel room, and you couldn’t for the life of you remember if you’d been the one to lean in first, or if it’d been him, or if it’d been both of you and what that meant. Did he like you, did you subconsciously want him in this way? Did this even mean anything? And what had those handcuffs been about?

He couldn’t answer most of those questions, and honestly, you weren’t sure you wanted the answers, but it’d been a day of awkward conversations, so you thought you might as well let your curiosity rule you for a few more minutes.

“Spencer, would you mind me asking a personal question?”

“Sure, we are married now. Don’t they say that the number one thing to remember in marriage is communication?” He tried to joke, but you couldn’t laugh as you got ready to spit some of the most horrific words you’d ever strung together out.

“Spencer, do you…do you often use handcuffs? In bed, I mean?” you were bright red, stood outside a 24 hour wedding chapel in the heart of Vegas and you couldn’t believe this was your life.

“Oh.” He was the same shade of red as you, and he stuttered through his next few incoherent words before you found his reply.

“I’ve not done it with the handcuffs before, but I guess I’ve…thought about it? It’s definitely in line with my… Do we have to do this here?”

“Would you rather talk about this on the jet?”

“Do we have to do this at all?” He groaned, shutting his eyes and you could feel the horror at his own actions spreading through his body.

“We are married now. Communication is key, remember?” He sighed and acquiesced, running a hand through his hair before turning back to you and forcing the words out.

“I know you probably didn’t think this about me before, but I am pretty controlling in bed. I don’t like feeling… hopeless, and it just manifests as dominance, okay? It’s been a while since I had a partner though, so the handcuffs were new to me, but I’ve tied girls up before. Now can we stop this conversation here before someone on this very public street hears us?”

“Okay, yeah sure. That actually makes a lot of sense really.” You said, nodding and moving to get into the car. You tried to keep your thoughts to yourself, knowing that the knowledge of his preferences was going to plague your dreams for the next few nights.

“You don’t have to lie, Y/N, I know I don’t seem like the type.” He got into the passenger side next to you, and you ignored looking at him in the mirrors desperately as you started the engine and made your way back to the hotel.

“No, I mean it makes sense that it happened to us. I don’t think we would’ve ended up in bed together if we weren’t so… compatible.” You let the silence sit between you as you let him take in your words, driving to the orchestra of midday strip traffic.

“Oh.” He said. “Oooh.” He finally caught on, and you felt your head turning in his direction, but you forced it back towards the road, convincing yourself that you really didn’t need to see his reaction, to study his expressions.

“Well, at least we know that we both enjoyed it then.” You weren’t sure if he was just oblivious, or trying to get a reaction from you, but nonetheless, your heart clenched at that, excitement rising in your stomach.

You convinced yourself that it was probably just the alcohol, and drove in silence back to the hotel, ready for your departure.

--X--

🏷️ @w-windyy @multifandom-on-the-side @reidandhotchsgirl @babybluecakes @bluecandycake @hugyourlungs @prentissesredtanktop @reidscaffeine @bethanyhaas01 @average-sunflower @academiareid @sailortongue @lover-of-books-and-tea @star0055 @daddy-dotcom @zaapsite @high-functioning-cosplayer @anniewhalelover @abbyshmaby @isabel-ffl-xoxo @sujan39 @frxcless @bluestuesday @busy-buzzing @breadbrobin @maxinehufflepuffprincess @l0v3cam @booksandwonderlands @myescapefromthislife @kat453 @ferrjulie @kapeyama @scoobydoopoo @aelinismyqueen @littlesingingbean @jamiemuscatosslut @sharkcat1928 @xohoneybun @anchovy89freya @dysphoricsanity @alyssaxstan @ghostheartbeat @zada-quinn @beguiling3lavender @Casss2111 @zatannas-wand @rebloggiest-reblogger @wishyoudaskme @imawhoreforu @kspencer34 @academiacoffeelover @softservepunk

[queuestarter]

lapse

(finnick odair x reader)

cw: none

link to the request → finnick and reader get pregnant and have a shotgun wedding

open to finnick requests !!

“Wake up.”

You straddle Finnick’s hips as he sleeps, slapping at his chest to get him to wake up even sooner. He scrunches his nose at the gentle slaps, so you resort to the next best thing.

“Finnick,” you drawl, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him firmly. “Wake the hell up.”

His eyes slowly open, a smile growing on his face when he sees you on top of him. “Well, hello. Good morning to me.”

You roll your eyes but you can’t find it in yourself to get annoyed with him. “I have good news. Do you want to keep being annoying or do you want to hear it?”

Finnick flips you both over so that now he’s laying on top of you. He wraps his arms around your shoulders and nuzzles his face into your neck. “I’m up for some good news.”

“Sure seems like it.”

“I am!” He insists. 

“I guess I’ll just say it then. We’re having a baby. I’m pregnant.” A smile immediately breaks out across your face. You haven’t said the words out loud yet, so just acknowledging it is making you ecstatic.

Finnick pulls away from where he was kissing your skin quickly. “What? Are you serious?” His eyes frantically search yours. When you nod, he sits up fully and starts punching the air.

“What are you doing,” you giggle, hand covering your mouth. “What kind of reaction is that?”

“Yes! Yes, yes, yes!” He continues to punch the air before launching himself at you. “I did that. That’s my baby in there.” He kisses your lips twice before moving down to your stomach, which is currently covered by one of his shirts. He lifts up the fabric before speaking to your belly. “Hello, baby. It’s me, your daddy. You don’t know it yet, but this is the best moment of my life.”

You bury your face in your hands. “You’re so embarrassing.”

“Let’s get married,” Finnick says suddenly, pulling away from your skin. “Right now.”

You pull your hands away from your eyes and look at your boyfriend. His smile is so bright and his entire being is just radiating warmth. Without much thought, you nod enthusiastically. “Yeah. Yes, let’s do it.”

Finnick’s smile only grows wider, which you didn’t think was possible. “Right now?” 

“Yes!” You insist, getting up off the bed. “Go get dressed.”

You pick out a little white sundress that’s been sitting in the back of your closet for years. You grab some sandals and pull your hair back into a low bun. Finnick chooses a flowy white top and a nice pair of pants.

You two leave your house hand in hand and make your way to the beach. Finnick carries a woven net and you carry a small bowl that will be filled with sea water.

The two of you stand on the shoreline, quietly whispering the words of your district’s wedding song to one another, each verse broken up by small giggles and wandering hands. Finnick drapes the net over your heads and you brush each of your lips with the ocean water.

When the two of you kiss, it’s salty and short, but you decide that it’s the best kiss of your life. There’s no one there to witness you and Finnick’s matrimony, but neither of you care.

“This is everything I’ve ever wanted,” Finnick says, still under the protection of the net. “You’re everything.”

Your eyes well up. “I love you, Finn. You and this baby and this life we’ve built together.”

You two kiss once more before walking home.

-

[maaikeatthefullmoon]

Once upon a time, there was a Good Omens fanfiction reader, who swore they didn't like AUs.

They read all the discussions about the 'classics', the 'must reads' and shrugged.

"But it's not canon", they muttered to themself. "They're not human. How on Earth can anyone write these stories about them when they're not actually bloody human? It’s not right."

And then, dear reader, they were persuaded to read just one AU. They were still an angel and a demon, just in a slightly different universe. And then...then they tried a human AU. And then...then they were hooked. Obsessed, one might say.

That reader, dear reader, was me. Of course. Obviously. Well, duh. And I would like to share the obsession in the form of some recommendations.

I have the wonderful @shadesofecclescakes to thank for MANY of these absolute beauties, she is absolutely the QUEEN of recommendations (and medicinal gifs).

So, now, in no particular order, some Highly Recommended AUs:

Or Be Nice by charlottemadison Rated E - A is a bookseller, C is a drummer, they are BOTH petty bitches. They're newly neighbours. C has a CAT and I'm there for it, he also has migraines and I hard relate. It's bitchy and the pranks were DIVINE. It was also deliciously spicy. The loveliness is that the author really captured the flawed nature of humans but also how it can be overcome. Same author as What We Make of It (what was Shotgun Wedding - an absolute GO AU CLASSIC and one of the best things I've ever read)

Not a Mounted Dildo but a Fuck Machine by NaroMoreau & summerofspock Rated E - So very, very E. This one was just filthy. So wonderfully filthy. The authors would like to tell you there was no plot to their porn, but there really was. A meets a girl online, because A is straight. He really is. Honest. But then, oops, lockdown happens. But, it's a good thing, really. For his best homeboy C is there, to help this poor virgin 'learn the ropes' for when lockdown is over and he goes on his first date...with the girl he's so very much into...coz, no homo, yo...;)

The Whole Damned World Seemed Upside Down by WyvernQuill Rated M - An AU in the way that it's still angel/demon but after Crowley makes a wish for things to be 'different', the universe obliges...and he's dumped into a reality which is very, very different to what he knew. He learns some truths and there's a whole lot of drama. Beautifully written with a wonderful plot and great drama. Excellently described and would make for great TV. (Oh, and Death in the new reality is really squeamish - it's brilliant.)

Telling Tall Tales by Siobhans_World Rated E - A sweet pretend relationship fic, where A pretends to be Maggie's boyfriend to help her pass as straight for her family. But he then meets her cousin, C, who he then inevitably (ineffably?) falls for. Miscommunication, angst, fluff, gay panic, it's got everything.

Flawless by @mrghostrat & @chernozemm Rated E - I've decided only to include one fic by each author and boyyy was it hard for ghostrat! But Flawless was, well, flawless. For such a relatively short story, it kept us guessing until the end. The characters were all beautifully written - the flaws (ha.) were DEEP and CRACKED but so fucking perfectly sculpted and presented. It was incredibly real and believable. Extremely maturely written and satisfying. AND THE ART!!!

How To Pull An Angel: A Bunnings DIY Guide by NascentSurrender Rated M - When I first saw the title, I thought it was going to be a silly, irreverent, comedy romp. But it was actually a funny, well written story that will stick in my mind always. Firstly, C watches Bluey - which is now CANON for me. Secondly, having lived in Aus as a child, I've got a soft spot for the country anyway, and I've barely ever seen it come up, so this was lovely. There were some wonderfully humorous bits, but also tender and beautiful moments that I adored.

Montreal Confidential by Maggie_Honeybite Rated E - I learned about Montreal (and Canada & their baked goods), classical music and mafia stuff in this fic. A is a widower. C plays the cello. His cello's name is Bentley. This is one of the only age-gap, mild D/s fics I've actually gotten into. There's fluff AND drama. CW for non-con (not A/C)

Under the Summer Stars by @pannotbread Rated E - an amazing astrophysics/astroecology/astrobiology fic that has pining, slow burn and Only One Telescope (yes, really, and it's everything you'd imagine). It's got beautifully written (erotic) imagery and So Much Science that's been written accessibly but still with amazing detail. It's poetry. It's hot. It's gorgeous. CW for internalised homophobia and self hatred. *Not completed yet*

Oddity by @tsyvia48 Rated E - A museum fic! About David Bowie! A is in charge of collections, C is an actor hired by (highly incompetent) Gabriel to guest curate a new Bowie exhibit. Miscommunication ensues for delicious tension. There's bitchiness, there's a bit of light angst, there's a lotta love. *Not Completed Yet* Poetry Carved In Flesh by @fellandcrow Rated E - I'm obsessed by tattoos. Hence, I am obsessed by this story. I'm planning a(n enormous) GO tattoo once GO3 is out, and this fic has actually helped me with my ideas. London-based A stalks lovingly follows Edinburgh-based tattoo artist C online. They build up a rapport. Well, C likes A. A is SMITTEN with C. C encourages A to get tattoos. Which he does. C designs a tattoo especially for A, the fic has currently left off at the point where C is in London and going to tattoo A. *Not Completed Yet*

There Is A Light & It Never Goes Out by @phoen1xr0se Rated M - A escapes from a disappointing, chaotic life to a remote island for five months to do research on puffins. There he meets lighthouse keeper C. Who also ran away, 20 odd years ago. There is a chaotic, found family on the island, but it is small, and it is lovely. This fic is written with love and passion and the imagery is so beautiful. The author has actually gone to do Actual. Physical. Research. on puffins. So how is THAT for dedication? Cannot wait until it resumes. *Not Completed Yet*

Ok, because I am Bad At Tumblr, I've not tagged the majority of authors, if you are on here - please let me know if you're here and I'll edit!

I should probably add in the following, I suppose. I'm writing an AU.

Free by, well, me. Imposterssyndrome (yes I know it's Imposter Syndrome, but that one already existed) Rated E - A runs a bookshop, C has an unfortunate past as a runaway ex-addict. They meet in an acute mental health ward after both having had a mental health crisis. Eventually A invites C to move in, and they navigate sharing a space, and their lives together. The story starts heavy, and is an emotional roller coaster, but there are moments of fluff and smut mixed in. There is a happy ending, I promise. It's a passion project, heavily researched and has a LOT of lived experience in it. I've gotten to know some amazing people through it who have messaged me and shared their experiences and I'm so glad I wrote it. *Not Completed Yet*

Last thing to say - once I finish Free, I will be teaming up with @shadesofecclescakes to write another human AU which is VERY much in her wheelhouse and I CANNOT FUCKING WAIT. I just know you're all going to LOVE it. The only thing that will make it even better is ART, so we're still on the hunt for someone.

**Last-last thing to say. I’ve missed off a few Biggies. There are some super popular AUs, mostly written around 2019. Most people will have read them. I’ve tried to focus on the perhaps lesser-known & WIP ones. Although I know many people don’t read WIPs, hopefully you’ll (book)mark them for future!**

[monkey-network]

Good Stuff: Bluey's The Sign

Bluey is still great and I don't need to go into why again. What's most important is that even in such short time of knowing this cartoon, you can see the growth of it all. Joe and the crew share how the world of the Heeler family gets to learn, adapt, and grow without rapidly warping the status quo. You go through and see how everyone is able to work through rough and weird times with sincere maturity. Season 3's Finale is where this all comes to a head and it's as beautiful as I expected, MORESO.

Brandi got to be happy would've been enough for me

The Sign deals with the idea of hard ideas. Those hard ideas that aren't inherently about change, but issues that when faced with initially, it feels like a bad ending. A bad ending which can't be easily fixed and you don't know where to go from there, and it hurts. It hurts when hard ideas swoop in, ruins your mood, festers your mind, and leaves you aimless. Bluey shows that it happens, this is the rare time where a ton of crap hits the fan in one day and it's not something Chili or Bandit or any adult can fix right away. I've never experienced this, but I felt the pain Bluey, Bingo, Frisky, and Chili went through where they're bargaining, burying, and avoiding confronting a potential reality they didn't want. This is where the real hero of the special comes in...

Haven't said before, but Calypso is a masterful teacher

The parable of the farmer works as an incredible seedling thought for Bluey when she reveals her moving. It's not a story I ever heard, but known the message all too well. The message of not just accepting bad things that happen to you, but know that it'll never be the end of the world because of them. Don't think of it as deep, but a natural motif to grow with. This is where a debacle regarding the episode churns with me. It can seem like a cop-out that every character gets what they wanted by the end, as I said before the cartoon can be more idealistic than what our real life allows. Then again, the true beauty of Bluey I believe has always been if it's possible, the family will find a way and do it responsibly.

If happiness can be achieved, they'll know how to get it

Beyond all this, the special is great. They waste no minute here in art and storytelling, and as said before, it's like Smash Bros Ultimate where everything is here. There are great callbacks to episodes you probably wouldn't have thought about, on top of getting to see the whole Heeler family on Chili and Bandit's sides like that blew my mind. Plus I love seeing weddings, dude, like I wish I was there with them. The feels are tsunami-ous like it's unfair to say this is the all-time best episode of the show, but darn if it wouldn't be earned.

When else will I see the epicness of riding shotgun?

But to conclude, it's been said that after this the Ludo crew will take a indefinite hiatus from Bluey the series, especially when they have a new project underway. And honestly? I'm more than satisfied. The show could've ended here and I would've been somewhat at peace with them giving us this beautiful episode. I of course didn't get into this series since its beginning, but I came around the right time to enjoy it myself, to see others recognize its greatness, and to finally make it here. It's great to know this was only another chapter in the book, and I'll see to be around when it gets to come back. As for The Sign? What else is there to say?

It was Beautiful. Cheers to the crew for everything.

[alex-dot-com]

My personal SDV Shane HCs

Sebastian reminds Shane so much of his younger self it makes his heart ache. Seb, Abi and Sam remind him of himself and Jas’s parents when they were younger, before the accident.

His ears are covered in healed piercings, his lip and eyebrow also.

When he either marries the farmer or when the Joja Mart closes he starts working on the farm, and gets big. Like I picture year five Shane fuckin swole. Hay bale lifting and heavy machinery pushing all goes to his shoulders

Im not saying washboard abs, the kinda strength you see in proper weight lifters, all muscle and roundness thats rough around the edges.

I like to think there are old home videos of Shane and Jas’s parents that she plays sometimes, when the saloon gets a TV she brings them in to watch on the proper TV rather than the poor excuse that Marnie has, Shane cries like a baby seeing is old friends on a decent screen, in high quality.

and Seb, Abi and Sam watch jaws drop as alternate timeline versions of them appear on the screen

Shane can fuckin sing, while hes working that man has the OG emo anthems either blasting or singing them himself.

He does the cough at the beginning of ‘dear maria count me in’ and it makes him laugh everytime before he sings with the most angelic ex-emo voice the world has ever heard.

Shane and Jas’ parents definitely had a band of their own, Shane gives me Bass or Keyboard vibes along with primarily back up vocals but once he has a drink in him he could lead vocal for hours.

He seems like the kinda guy that once upon a time was probably the most stressed waiter known to man, nineteen years old Shane having decided to not go to college his roomates/bestfriends are pregnant and are planning a shotgun wedding, stressed outta his mind, industrial piercing rejecting and infected, eye twitching while a customer asks for their fries to be replaced with prawns and refusing to pay any extra costs for that

He gives screaming match in the kitchen with the chef and then going out back to smoke weed with him vibes.

[rue-dixon]

Bro-in-law Dandan propaganda

Dandan playing both sides for his sister and Chilchuck.

Chilwife venting about Chilchuck to her brother. "He just never listens! He's so stubborn I'm tired of him!" while Dandan's just nodding and agreeing like "mhm yeah he just doesn't understand what you're doing through when he's gone at all."

Turn around now to Chilchuck, venting to his brother in law aka his closest childhood friend about the same argument. "She just doesn't even try understand how hard it is for me too." And Dandan is once again nodding his head agreeing, "of course not, she doesn't understand just how hard those jobs actually are."

Uncle Dandan, but the girls call him Uncle Dan/Danny. Who's also closest with Puckpatti. Meijack's a daddy's girl, Flertom a mamas girls, and Puckpatti's an uncles girl.

Chilwife bugging Dandan about not being married yet. And tires to get Chilchuck to agree with her and talk to him about it too. But Chilchuck is just like "let the kid do what he wants, he'll find someone eventually."

When he first saw his sister and Meijack after she just gave birth (him being a child) he said Meijack looked like a "wrinkly potato".

Dandan became a dungeon adventurer because of Chilchuck, who tired really really hard to talk him out of it. But Dandan said he didn't plan on going very deep and wanted to stick with treasure hunters instead of hardcore explorers so Chilchuck laid off finally.

"Chilchuck's like the older brother I never had!"

"I'd say Dandan is the little brother I never had, but I have two of them and they're both little shits just like him."

Dandan would always ask how his sisters and nieces were doing when him and Chilchuck would be working at the guild together. But always obviously had more interest in Puckpatti.

"How's my sister?

"She's fine"

"... and Puck?"

"She's fine too, as well as my OTHER girls."

"Right right.. I was just gonna ask about them next!"

Chilchuck and Dandan worked together to form the guild. Dandan taking care of things when Chilchuck was away or on very long jobs.

Chilchuck and Dandan poked at each other a lot as children. But became good friends as adults. Especially when Dandan was old enough to start drinking, Chilchuck was happy to have a new dedicated drinking buddy. They even stayed close after his wife left him, "she left me, not him." Little does Chilchuck know, she actually told her brother she was leaving and why she left. But he never told Chilchuck because she asked him not to.

Dandan making fun of his sister's situation, especially when he was younger. Even if he actually didn't care about them having shotgun wedding, he just thought it was funny.

"This wouldn't have happened if you just kept your legs closed."

"Only I get to call my sister a whore because it's funny. Anyone else who tries dies."

Uncle Dandan telling the girls crazy stories about their parents when they were younger. Stories that the two of them never wanted their kids to know.

Dandan: what's that?

Chilchuck: huh? Oh those are the brothels for adventurers.

Dandan: oh... you never used it did you?

Chilchuck: what? No! Why would you think I'd cheat on my wife?!

Dandan: just making sure...

Since Chilchuck wants to hide his family from work. He has to tell Dandan not to tell anyone that they're in laws. That they're just friends and that's it. And he'd prefer if he didn't bring up his sister or nieces in conversations. Dandan thought he was weird and got a little suspicious. But Chilchuck explained his reasoning and Dandan agreed, it didn't affect him much anyways.

Dandan: so, what are you and my sister fighting about now?

Chilchuck: what? Where did you get that idea from??

Dandan: you've been sleeping in the union quarters for three days straight. So what's she mad at you for this time?

Chilchuck: ...

He's a built in babysitter even if he kinda hates it. But he loves his nieces so it's ok.

When they were estranged he fully believed they'd get back together and wasn't worried about them getting an official divorce at all. And just waved it off every time he was asked about it.

"You kidding? They couldn't keep their hands off each other when we were kids. Practically inseparable. I'm sure they'll talk, realize how much they miss each other, have makeup sex and then go on like none of this ever happened."

Anyways why'd they make him so cute in the anime tf

[roosterbruiser]

hi! could i request something where jake secretly has an older daughter that he had with his high school sweetheart during their senior year and the squad finds out? i just love the idea of jake and his high school girlfriend being married and just as in love now as they were back then

𝐂𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐌𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲

𝐚 𝐉𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞

Things hadn't always been easy with Jake--God, no.

Well, really, things had been downright blissful in the beginning. What were teenagers going to fight about anyway? You two just clicked--you knew you were right for each other.

Then you got pregnant. And for a while, actually, things had been really hard.

Between the fateful night of your graduation when your pregnancy test came back positive and the next eight months of your pregnancy, the two of you fought more than you ever had before. It wasn't just because he was trying to do the responsible thing by asking you to marry him--which, let's be honest; he had planned on doing that long before the positive pregnancy test--and the stress of planning the shotgun wedding you were trying really hard not to call a shotgun wedding. It was the hormones and the academy and the moving cross-country in the middle of a difficult pregnancy and all the growing up the two of you had to do so hastily.

The two of you had bickered here and there--which was bound to happen when you are devoted to someone from the seventh grade forward--but had never fought as passionately as you were while you were pregnant. It was senseless arguments, ones sprinkled in between trainings and morning sickness and job searches and taping boxes.

It wasn't even that the two of you didn't love each other. That's what the most frustrating part of it all was, really; the two of you were stupidly in love. Like the kind of love people really only see on screens, which you would never say out loud (even though you know it's true), and wish for but usually never get.

Everything changed the day Charlotte was born. You went into labor in the middle of an impassioned argument--one that was going precisely nowhere, not that either of you would admit it--and made it to the hospital to settle in comfortably for a very uncomfortable seventeen hours of labor.

Young as you both were, scared (terrified, really) as you both were, exhausted as you both were--everything else in the world melted away when you held that little pink, squirming baby against your chest.

Jake had been a wreck, suddenly realizing how absolutely out of his element he was as a measly 19-year-old with a wife and baby on the way, but had not left your side for even a moment. And when Charlotte, that sweet and loud little thing, finally settled with her chubby cheek against the red skin of your chest--something changed in his body. Already he knew that he loved you--God, he loved you so much. But seeing you there on the hospital bed with your hair plastered to your sweaty head and your cheeks flushed and your eyes swollen from crying, that love suddenly expanded and overwhelmed him. He felt like he was going to positively drown in all that love.

As if you sensed it, you looked up at him with an exhausted sort of awe-struck look. Your eyebrows were raised, your dry lips parted, your cheeks flushed, your eyelashes clumped with tears.

"She's got your big mouth," you had said to him, laughing breathily, cradling her against you.

You were shaking--not just from the sheer effort of pushing that baby into this world, but from the overwhelming amount of love coursing through your veins for that little stranger in your arms.

It had made all the nurses and doctors laugh as they still hustled and bustled around your open legs, but neither you or Jake even noticed them. You were looking up at your husband--who was suddenly not that flirty boy with the sweeping blonde hair that let you put your books in his locker, but a man with tears of pride streaming down his face as he looked down at his newly-expanded family for the first time.

He thought he was going to explode--but instead he just sobbed out a laugh. Then he leaned forward and pressed your damp hair out of your face, bringing his salty lips down on your forehead again and again. His quivering hand pressed against Charlotte's back and God, he loved her so much already. He hadn't even really seen her face for the first time, but he knew she was fucking perfect. He could feel it just under the pads of his fingers, could feel your laughter and your tears beneath his trembling lips.

"No more fightin', angel. I promise. I'm sorry," he whispered against your skin, resting his nose against your temple, sniffing hard. "Don't ever wanna fight with you ever again, okay? Love you too damn much to be arguin' all the time."

"I love you so much," you whispered to him, lips trembling as they pressed against his wet ones, bones aching with tired. "I don't ever wanna fight with you again."

But as he cupped your cheek and nuzzled his nose against yours, peppering kisses all along your tears and flushed skin, you knew that he meant it. No more arguing. You knew something was bound to change, knew it would probably change once Charlotte was born, but you hadn't expected it to be so immediate. But you were radiating love now--so happy you felt like your heart was gonna fall out of your chest.

And the two of you, as devoted to each other and your daughter as you are, kept the promise with a fierceness. No more fighting--you meant it and so did he.

Now that you're used to deployments and special detachments and moving and all the rare beauty that is attached to life as a Naval aviator's wife, everything runs smoothly.

He loves that you still send him a picture of Charlotte every single day while he's not home--something you'd done since his very first deployment when she was a few months old. You never missed a day--like ever, which he still didn't understand the logistics of--and always wrote a paragraph about yours and Charlotte's day.

When she was little, it had been something like:

Today Charlotte and I went to the park. It was that cute little one by our house, the one with all the dogs and food trucks. She's getting really good at holding her head up on her own! And she's not so fussy anymore about tummy time, which is a relief. I got to read a little bit of my book while she napped on the picnic blanket. She wore that sunhat your mama got her (as seen in the attached photo) and laughed at a dog that came to investigate her. She's a big fan of animals--might be something to consider, huh? Right now, she is talking my ear off about you, telling me all about those bedtime stories you read and how your voices are so much better than mine. I get it--I'm obsessed with you, too. We miss you. Gonna go pray at the shrine we made for you, I guess. Get home safe, okay? We love you.

But right now, as Jake sits in The Hard Deck only a few days after the successful Uranium Mission, he's smiling as he scrolls through the emails you'd sent him that he's only just now able to read.

He's nursing a beer, shoulders slumped and lips pulled faintly upwards as he basks in the warm evening sun filtering in through the window. It's noisy as ever all around him--Rooster pounding away on the piano with Maverick right there next to him, Coyote and Fanboy shooting the shit as they play a truly pathetic game of pool, someone being thrown overboard--but everything's white noise when he reads your emails.

Your emails are a little bit different now--especially now that Charlotte is twelve. She's less apt to let you take pictures of her now, going through the make-a-face-at-the-camera phase or just running away at the first sign of your lens facing her. You managed to snap a good one the other day, one where her green eyes are glimmering in the sun as she sips on a lemonade. Jake looks closely at the picture and decides that the two of you are at that little bistro by your house that you like to walk to.

Your daughter's glossy hair is longer than it was when he left and God, if she isn't growing more and more beautiful everyday. She looks just like you. She's got your exuberance and even though he would never say it to you or Charlotte, she's even got the little crinkle between her brows that seems to just pulse when she's frustrated.

He rereads your paragraph again.

Well, good morning to you, Lieutenant Husband. I woke up this morning to your daughter's dog peeing on the rug outside the bathroom. And your daughter thought that was the funniest thing in the world until I made her clean it up! I'm a mean mom, I guess. But I made up for it because we walked down to Frankie's and I let her get the bottomless lemonade. Currently writing this during her fourth bathroom trip. Think we're gonna catch a movie in a little bit and then maybe get some ice cream after. We miss you, baby. Can't wait to hear your voice again. And even though she won't say it, I know Charlotte can't wait to take you up on that beach day you promised her. Be good, stay safe, stay alive, okay? We love you more than anything in the world and you're definitely gonna have to re-potty train Sandy when you come home!

He missed you two more than anything in the world. But what he missed the most was just the domesticity the two of you had blissfully settled into. What he wouldn't give to wake up to Sandy peeing on the rug outside the bathroom, to back you up when Charlotte groaned about having to clean it up, to walk down to Frankie's with the two of you and tease Charlotte for using the bathroom so many times, to go see whatever stupid Kristen Stewart movie is playing, to eat a cone of mint chip ice cream and take the long way home. He ached for it, really--even if he knew there was only a few more days until he'd be back in it.

He could hardly wait.

"Who's the teeny-bopper?"

Jake nearly jumps out of his skin, jerking back against the wooden booth and snapping up to look up at the squadron that has suddenly gathered all around him. It's Payback that's asked, his eyebrow perched as he leans in to get a closer look at Charlotte.

"God, she looks just like you," Phoenix adds, narrowing her eyes on what is essentially Hangman's mouth and nose on a much smaller face. "Younger sister?"

Everyone's staring at Jake now.

It isn't even that he's been hiding the two of you--he loves showing you off. But it's just that it hasn't come up and quite frankly, they've been a little busy the past few weeks.

Bob's always been good at reading people--so when he studies the photograph and then studies the redness in Hangman's cheeks and the way he wets his tongue nervously, Bob knows. Bob knows before anyone else--besides Maverick and Coyote, that is.

"How's my niece?" Coyote asks, clapping Jake on the shoulder with a sly grin.

Jake sighs, shaking his head softly at Javy before submitting to it all--thrusting his phone forward to let the squadron read your email and look at the picture of Charlotte.

"Niece? No way," Fanboy exclaims, brows furrowed. "No way."

But now Rooster is holding the phone, his mouth agape, zooming in on Charlotte's face and it is suddenly undeniable to everyone there--that is absolutely the spawn of Jake Seresin. Right down to the dimples and the green eyes, that is his daughter.

"Charlotte," Jake says softly, trying to choke down all that pride that is inching its way up his throat. "She's twelve. And she's the best person that's ever lived, obviously."

Phoenix would've snorted if she hadn't been so totally awe-struck.

"You taking all the credit for that?" Rooster quips, shooting a playful smirk Jake's way.

But Jake just holds his hands up in surrender, sighing as he shakes his head.

"I'll give that to the wife," he says fondly. "She's also the best person that's ever lived. Better than all of you combined."

Coyote takes a sip of his own beer before nodding.

"Oh, absolutely," he agrees at once. "That woman's a saint for putting up with you and raising that Hellion."

Javy's joking of course--he'd actually never seen a more communicative, loving relationship than yours and Jake's. And he'd never met such a well-rounded girl as Charlotte. She had a good head on her shoulders, put there by her parents. Javy was even sure that Charlotte knew more than he did already and she hadn't even finished middle school.

"A wife, too?" Bob asks softly, smiling as he reads your email.

"And a dog," Fanboy adds softly, scanning over your paragraph.

Jake hums, nodding, trying not to look too pathetically in love with you. Even though he is, in fact, pathetically in love with you.

"Going on thirteen years," Jake says. "Thirteen happy years."

And everyone knows that he means it, especially when he just glances back at his phone in Rooster's hands and smiles softly to himself. He is thoroughly in love with you and with your daughter--Hell, he just loves your shared life. He's itching to go home, even if a poorly house-trained dog is waiting for him.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Phoenix says, bumping him with her eyebrows furrowed.

"And when can we meet them?" Payback adds.

Jake is grinning now--just the prospect of his Navy family meeting his real family makes affection swarm his heart. He shrugs.

"Maybe we could figure something out before everyone has to go. I'm sure we can get Charlotte out of school for a couple of days. Family's a good enough reason for me--bet it will be for the wife, too."

He's gushing with pride--he's not even trying to, but he really is. Coyote is used to the way Jake practically glows when he talks about you and Charlotte. Hell, he even gets it. You're beautiful and funny and kind and whip-smart. You hold it down and make it look easy. And Charlotte is a perfect balance of the two of you, striking every single genetic sweet-spot.

"I'm shocked," Rooster says. "You're so...gooey right now."

"Yeah, Bagman," Phoenix says with a smile. "Going all soft on us."

Hangman wants to roll his eyes again. Really, he does. But he just can't. So he takes another sip of his beer, thinks about the way you would be cuddled into him right now and quipping back at Rooster as the two of you watch Charlotte sweetly order her third lemonade from Penny, and shrugs with a grin tugging on his lips.

"I guess I am," he smiles.

here is my tag list!!

if you liked this, consider checking out my Jake x You story!

[crueisummer]

𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 | 𝓒𝓛16

pairing: charles leclerc x reader

summary: Kika and Pierre invite you to their engagement party where you meet her and Pierre’s friends from F1, specifically, a certain handsome Monegasque driver.

playlist: ♫ gorgeous ♪ delicate ♬ i think he knows ♡ you are in love

author's note: Hello everyone! Please be patient as this will be my first fanfic/au. Anyway, this would be part of a series, and each song from the playlist above would be the title of a chapter. I still don't know what to call the series, so if you have any suggestions, please send them my way. Anyway, thanks for reading, and enjoy the story! ✧･ﾟ:૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა✧･ﾟ:

chapter warnings: a lot of swearing.

word count: 1.7k

disclaimer: All characters and events in this story, even those based on real people, are entirely fictional.

                𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬

01:58 ━━━━●───── 03:29 ⇆ㅤ ㅤ ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻ ılıılıılıılıılıılı ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮

Your car pulled up in front of the restaurant’s door. Your security guard got out of the shotgun seat and opened your car door. Everyone started to go crazy when they saw you. The lights of the paparazzi’s camera flicking every millisecond, trying to get a photo of every move you make. There’s security on your left and right, protecting you.

The door to the restaurant opened and there was a receptionist holding a clipboard.

"Y/F/N Y/L/N." You smile as you look at her. Their eyes widen and mouth gaped before gesturing for you to go follow the usher. You took an elevator and got off on the rooftop. You walked in and looked around, amazed at the beauty of the place. There were a lot of tables and booths, some afloat on water. There's a lot of people and caterers walking around with food and drinks.

Everyone is dressed in semi-formal attire which made you sigh in relief for your outfit. You are wearing a sparkly sleeveless jumpsuit that showed off your curves and just a bit of your skin.

As you made your way into the party, there were a lot of familiar faces. Celebrities, actors, athletes. You saw Kika and Pierre in a booth in the middle.

"Show me the ring!" You scream as soon as you see your best friend. She turns around and laughs at you.

"Well, hello to you too!" She giggles as the two of you hug. You pull away quickly to see her left hand. A big diamond rock sitting on her ring finger.

"Wow. You sure have taste, Gasly, I'll give you that." You smirked at Pierre and hugged him too.

"Congratulations, you guys! So, am I a bridesmaid?" You joke at Kika, fluttering your eyelashes. You have been best friends for 3 years now, having met at a Louis Vuitton fashion show during Paris Fashion Week. Since then, you and Kika were inseparable. You both understood and supported each other.

"Cut the crap. You know you're maid of honor." She says smirking.

"Oh my god! I love you so much!" You scream and wrap your arms around her. You’ve never been a maid of honor and somewhere in the back of your mind, a memory clicked. You remembered that you and Kika promised to be each other’s maid of honor.

The couple laughs at your reaction and Kika tells you she’ll set up a meeting soon about the wedding, she’s going to be needing help. You nod right away. The grooms are always no help when planning a wedding. Just then, a guy comes up from behind you and greets them.

"Speaking of, here's the best man!" Pierre walks closer to him and does that guy hug thing. The mysterious man was slightly taller than Pierre and was wearing a white unbuttoned shirt and some khaki shorts. He looked good.

"Charles!” Kika greeted. Charl? Is he French? It's the French that don't pronounce the "s" at the end of their names, right?

He kisses Kika's cheeks while he and Pierre talk a bit in French and laugh. You didn't realize you were staring until Kika introduced you to him.

"Y/N, this is Charles, he'll be Pierre's best man." Kika says and you turn to face him. He kind of has a boyish face but his piercing green eyes and stubble that ran from chin to jaw makes him look mature. He looked gorgeous.

"Hi, I’m Charles." He says while extending his hand. He looks into your eyes while talking to you and you almost melted. You shyly look at your hands and look back again at his eyes, to see that he didn’t remove his gaze. Those eyes. How wonderful it would be to get lost in them.

"I’m Y/N." You smile shyly. You were getting shy. You never get shy. You always had the upper hand and was very confident in yourself when meeting new people. But somehow, someway, you can’t say anything.

You take his hand and shake it. You felt like you were drugged when your hands met. It put you on a high, one you want to be in for the rest of your life.

“So happy to finally meet you. You know, they always talk about you and sing your songs, especially Pierre.” Charles says, to make small talk and show that he is friendly and approachable.

“Oh, does he know? He always says my songs are cheesy.” You say while smirking at Pierre, Kika laughing her ass off. “Although I do have a video of him dancing to You Belong With Me.”

Kika’s eyes widen immediately, and the couple looks at each other. Pierre’s face is red from embarrassment. He exclaims, “You told me you didn’t send her the video!”

While the two bickered, you didn’t notice Charles was now standing closer to you. “You know, I would love to have a copy of that video,” He whispers. He was so close that you could smell his perfume.

Before you could reply, Kika is shoo-ing the guys. “Anyway, me and Y/N are gonna do some girl talk now.”

“Look for me later if you want the video.” You whisper to Charles, and he smirks before leaving with Pierre. Charles turns around and winks at you. It caught you off guard, but you smiled. When he looks away and turns back around, you look at Kika and see she was on her phone. Oh my god. The greatest thing that has ever happened to you and your best friend was on her fucking phone.

Kika looks up on her phone and was about to talk to you when she gets dragged into another booth. She looks at you and mouths, “Later.” But you wave her off, you know you can’t hog the host of the party.

You roamed around the party talking to everyone but Charles. You caught up with Kika’s friends; some you met before, some you haven’t. You got along with the other bridesmaids which erased the worry from the back of your mind that you might not get along.

One group of girls were calling themselves “WAGS” and laughing. It seemed like an inside joke, so you whispered to Kika, “What the fuck is a WAG?” and she laughs.

“Wives and girlfriends of professional athletes.” Your face scrunched up in disgust and she nodded her head. “I know, right?”

Good thing Kika was there to tell you that the girls who were calling themselves WAGS are in a relationship with F1 drivers. Kelly and Max, Carmen and George, Heidi and Daniel, Sara and Lance, Lily and Alex, Louise and Kevin, and Egle and Nico.

Some of Pierre’s single friends did try to hit on you, though. But you brushed them off and established being friends with them when they tried to ask you out.

While talking to everyone, you forgot to count how many shots and drinks you’ve been taking. You realized that you were drunk when as you were going to the bathroom, you didn’t take time to adjust to the dimmed lighting and you missed a step and almost fell. Thankfully, a pair of arms came out of nowhere and caught you.

“Est-ce que ça va, mon amour?" Are you okay, love? Charles. You talked to everyone in this party, and this voice you only heard for five minutes but instantly recognize it. He picks you up and you both try to steady yourself.

“Oui, merci.” Yes, thank you. Based on the context of you falling, you assumed that he asked if you were alright. You giggled as you tried your hardest to copy his accent, even though you were flat out drunk.

You lost your balance again and Charles gently set you down to sit on one of the steps. One of his hands going to the small of your back, careful not to hit your back.

Once you were settled, he squats in front of you, a shocked look on his face. He asks, “Tu parles français?" You speak French?

With the dimmed lighting and how close your faces are, you can see just how perfect his face is. He looks like a god.

“What?” You gave up. Your knowledge of the French language only limited to “yes”, “thank you” and “I love you.”

“You understand?” His Monegasque French accent lingering when he talks in English. His grammar is fucking adorable.

“No, I just know a few phrases from travelling to France.” You smile sheepishly. Leaning your head on the wall, “Is it good, though?”

“Yes, yes. Your accent almost fooled me.” He smiles at you. Your stomach is feeling crazy. Is this what it feels like when they say they “have butterflies in their stomach?” Because this feels like a fucking zoo.

“So, I haven’t seen you all night. Have you been ignoring me?” He asks you. You can’t tell if he’s flirting or if it’s a genuine question.

“Hmmm, maybe?” You took a chance and flirted with him. Pretending like you were ignoring his eyes and then looking at him and laughing.

“Why? What did I do?” He pouts. I think he knows that he’s beautiful. Otherwise, he would not have any confidence in pouting in front of a girl, right?

“Hmm, didn’t I tell you to look for me? And not the other way around?” You reminded him.

“Ahh, yes. My apologies, cheri.” He apologizes. His metallic rings startling your warm skin as he takes your right hand and kisses it. You were shocked, eyes wide.

“Can you forgive me, mon amour?” He takes your left hand and kisses it too. With his puppy eyes, he leans closer, still holding both of your hands near his lips.

“I- I-” He looked so gorgeous; you couldn’t say anything. He caught you off guard and your tongue couldn’t form any word. Your brain having a hard time comprehending what was happening.

You nodded your head and he smiled at you. You knew that he was thinking that he had the upper hand, but right now, while he is holding your hands and his face so close to yours, you didn’t mind.

"Apology accepted, mon amour." You try to copy him. His eyes shine when he hears you talk in his mother tongue.

"I have to ask, do you really want Pierre's video, or do you just want my number?" You smirk at him. You try to catch him off guard but he chuckles and smirks back at you.

"Can't a man have both?"

...

↠ ⁿᵉˣᵗ ˢᵒⁿᵍ 𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞

[gaymurdersalad]

[ HOWDY Y’ALL! WE INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM FOR A FUN BROADCAST!

If you haven’t noticed, it’s pride month! That means we’re legally allowed to be gay for an entire month before we have to disappear into our burrows once more! To celebrate the occasion, I decided to do a fun little pride post! ]

[ I’ve gathered all the little fuckers in The Void to poke and prod at them like zoo animals. In other words, I figure they all have some neat identities and wouldn’t mind being interrogated in honor of pride month. I’ll go ahead and turn it over to them, but I’ll say now, no matter how much they kick and scream, I am definitely NOT holding them at gunpoint! This workspace is… definitely OSHA approved. Don’t let them tell you otherwise. Have attem! ]

> This is fucking stupid. Stop waving that gun at me. I’m talking.

> My identity isn’t anything special. I’m just some guy who decided he was a guy way later than everyone else did. I don’t really give a damn what pronouns people use on me because usually they just end up avoiding me at all costs or scampering away like frightened animals.

> I’m bisexual, is that anything? But, like, only bisexual in a sexual way. I could not fucking fathom living a long prosperous life with anyone. How the hell are you supposed to enjoy someone for that long? Getting married seems like a scam. I bet it is. I bet it’s like the invention of Valentine’s Day for greeting card companies. You’re not actually supposed to be in love with someone for that long, it just doesn’t seem possible.

> … My marriage with Dave does not count, that wasn’t an officiated wedding. I’m fairly certain he fished those rings out of a water fountain and pawned his dress off a hooker. I do vividly recall dumpster diving for my tuxedo.

> Uhhhhhh wuh? Hmmmm, I’onno what the hell I am, Old Sport! Fuck!

> Shit, I guess I like everyone. A hole’s a hole. Why the fuck would I discriminate? I think I got a preference for men though! They’re so fuckin’ easy to romance! Unless they’re the likes of Sportsy, then it’s the hardest goddamn thing you’ll ever seduce. He gets real gay when he’s on acid, but then again, I get real gay on cocaine. Man, our wedding was immaculate. Imma tell our kids about it one day!

> Likewise, I’ll be any gender you fuckin’ want me to be. I got like, pocket gender, I can just whip it out on request. Want me to be a dude? Fuck yeah, alright. Want me to be a pretty lady? No goddamn problem at all! I can be both at the same time or one more than the other— who gives a shit? I’m just havin’ fun.

> Good fucking lord, really? That shotgun does not scare me, you orange fool—

> … I have a complicated identity. As any other living organism does.

> I have found that over the years I do not experience sexual attraction and that I experience little to no romantic attraction. I only recall feeling romantically attracted to one person in my entire life. I doubt it will happen again. > And it may seem, uhm... Embarrassing, but I do deviate from your traditional "man's man". In laymen's terms, I do not feel particularly drawn to being male. I am very certain I was born with the intention of being a man, but my mind has refused to accept it. I am not sure why. Instead of feeling like a proper bloke, I feel rather empty. If I could have it my way, I would be some... human silhouette rather than a full fledged man. I do not know. This is idiotic. > I cringe every time someone addresses me in a masculine way. I wish I could simply have no pronouns. I can deal with them because I am indeed a grown ass... person, but I just wish it were not so. Whatever. I am done complaining.

> Oh! That’s very simple, this is really easy.

> I literally don’t have anything going for me at all.

> What with the entire fabric of time being on my shoulders and all, I don’t even think about gender or romance much. I do love being a girl! It’s one of the things I miss most about being alive, actually. Pretty dresses, playing with makeup in the bathroom, trying to curl my hair without burning my scalp— I mean, it sounds horrendous sometimes, but you can’t beat it. Feeling alive and content in your own skin. Just one of those precious things that spawned from the chance of life.

> … Uhm, Uhhh… Men.

> Yeah. I Like Them. I Think… Yes, I Could Probably Date A Man Or Two. I Don’t Know, Employee, Why Did You Pull Me Out Here? You Know I Have Copious Paperwork To Do! Some @$!# $#*@ Kid Just Fell Into The Ball Pit And Got Mauled Jaws-Style And His Parents Are Really Grilling Us For It. Dumb&@#*s, It’s Not My Fault Their Kid Heeded The Call Of The Sirens. I Swear, This Job Is Going To Kill Me Or Force My Hand Into Becoming The Next Purple Guy—

> extremely in love with my wife and my gender!

> it was actually very cute how we met, employee. have i ever told you? heh heh, we met in highschool. she was on the football team and i was a cheerleader, can you believe that? oh, i was head over heels for her instantly. she was strong, she was quick thinking, she was so hecking beautiful, employee… i never got to tell her how i felt while we were in highschool, but we were good friends. very good friends. come a few years later, some old buddies of ours want to have a get together and dish it out like old times… go vandalize and drive off into the sunset in the back of a pickup truck sipping on horrendously cheap beer and laughing off our university work or our jobs. when i get to our spot, though, i see her. i’d recently wised up to my gender, y’know, had my hair cut and fresh scars on my chest, so suffice to say i looked nothing like i did when i cheered for her during football season. she’d done the same, employee— she grew out her hair to the middle of her back in such beautiful dark curls, her bangs tied back so every inch of her perfect face could glimmer underneath the neon lights of the derelict bowling alley we’d found ourselves in. she looked at me, and i sensed instant recognition. she smiled through her bright red lipgloss and rushed up to me, wrapping me up in a hug, and i swear, she hadn’t lost any of those muscles— almost broke my ribs!

> the rest of the night, we were so… comfortable together. sure, during highschool we were close, but without saying a single word about what happened to us between then and now, we understood, and employee— i think it brought us closer. it was around three in the morning while we sat around a bonfire with the rest of our buddies when she layed her head on my shoulder and i felt an unfathomable warmth. i knew i wanted her for the rest of my life.

> … i just love her so much, employee.

> oh ok

> its rlly whatever. any pronouns any gender anybody who wants me. who cares

> oh i do have a preference for girls. theyre pretty. if you disagree u are not blessed enough to be loved by gods best creation and ur pissed about it. i can tell

> what if i was actually catholic would that be fucked up or what

> …

> … I cannot… physically stress how abhorrent sexuality is to me. What… What an utterly damning notion. Someone’s greedy hands cursing you and plaguing your with their own dirty human desires. How disrespectful. How… invasive. Why on Earth would it be my responsibility to supply someone with something to love? Am I really subject to whatever the hell people think of me? Whether they “love” me or perceive me as some… some man, some object of attraction? Disgusting.

> If I could shed every trace of a sex or gender from my loathed corpse, I would. Often times I lay awake at night and consider skinning myself for the hell of it. I’ve related this to David and he said I sounded “fuckin’ insane”. Stupid bastard. I want to be a skeleton. I wanna be a fucking skeleton! Pretty and thin and not alive whatsoever! God damn this accursed body and its… rancid flesh and unidentifiable mystery goop. Ugh. Ugh!!!! God, the biggest blight on my “life” was being cursed with gender!

> I was born as a female which was just laughably wrong, then I recall amending that and trying to become a man, but none of it worked. All of it sucked. All of it was wretched. The ideal form is a ghost or ghoul or skeletal figure. You can’t romance a ghost or ghoul or skeletal figure. Can’t have sex with that. Unless you’re really, really determined. I don’t think even David could be that serious about his sexuality.

> … I… Hope. Oh dear. Oh god, I really am unsafe from the horrors of this world. God, I wish that bear had taken me out before I showed him to his grave.