#WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

[rotisseries]

skyward sword was such a crazy insane game to make like ok what if there was a story about a great evil and a goddess. and that goddess locked away that great evil, but she knew it would come back, and it would need to be defeated again. and what if that goddess knew that for this impossible task, she would need a loyal soldier. so she reincarnates. she reincarnates into a human girl, because the best way, the most reliable way, to get a loyal soldier, is love. and a goddess is respected, and idolized, and revered, but a goddess isn't loved. not like a human girl is. so she reincarnates. and she is loved genuinely and wholeheartedly, by her family, by her peers, and most importantly, by her best friend.

and what if there was a story about a boy and a girl. this one boy loves her so much, that when she falls from the sky, crashing to the earth, and into her immortal destiny, he follows her. and she runs, because she has a destiny, because she's finding out she is part of a divine plot, she and the boy are pawns in a goddess' war plans. did she ever love him did he ever love her or were they just being manipulated by the goddess. SHE'S the goddess. was SHE just manipulating him this whole time? "I'm still your zelda" but is she really? does she know it for sure? she doubts it and doubts it and runs and runs and he keeps chasing her. and she locks herself in time to defeat this great evil and he watches her do it. and he fights because he loves her and he defeats the evil and he gets her back and they're happy.

but what if there was a story about a goddess and a great evil. the evil cursed them for the rest of time. their descendants will never be safe there will always be evil to fight and she'll always be running and sacrificing and he'll always be chasing and fighting.

what if there was a story about a goddess and a great evil. what if there was a story about a girl and a boy. what if it was about the innate mortality and humanity of love and the act of loving. ok. at the walls of nintendo hq

[decladams]

watched severance s2 finale so probably i will just go throw up and die idk man

[pillowenvelopchair]

WHAT THE FUCK THE SOTE TRAILER DROPPED!??;??;:)₱;);@@(“””

[wonderxshows]

that was. an ending that happened For Sure

[possession1981-moving]

It's Megan Monday! 💖

[spiribia]

in this universe werewolves are a union between a demon and a human host. with more powerful demons the host is often parasitized to the point of being just an empty human husk containing a demon, but some lesser or benevolent demons have more amicable arrangements, and some by-technicality-werewolves even have demons that only tag along and see the world through your eyes (these cases are considered werewolf 'immune'. when a werewolf bites you and transmits its venom into your bloodstream, the venom acts a beacon for demons to locate your body. they won't take over a human host that's already occupied by another demon, though, so in many cases having a lesser demon prevents any more aggressive demons from trying anything). anyway youre a werewolf hunter chasing down signs of a mark at some club and your assigned werewolf hunter partner whos clearly "not" a "werewolf" is really dragging her feet for this one and you notice some dude thats clearly charming people and devouring them in the back alley and your partners like Dont go back there. lets just forget about this one and youre like What but this is the mark isnt it. the whole point of us being here is to stop it. & then it turns out its some actual demon lord.

[faerl]

Wait virgomoon deactivated :((

[quichetein]

hey quick question. is this...

is this normal? is everyone else experiencing this?

[berrypass-de-murdler]

3 - 1 Resorting to Murder

HOW THE HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL AM I ON THE THIRD BOOK

My WORD that artwork looks big fsr but FLETCH FINALLY LET ME FINISH UP RAD CRIMSON!! She doesn't look too scary here, but she is kind of a piece of shit in general

DON'T READ THE EPISODES WITHOUT READING THE BOOKS!!

Some static, like a tape was put into a VHS. The grainy picture starts reeling, curly letters appearing on old paper.

“WELCOME, AUDIENCE, TO THE ADVENTURE OF A LIFETIME!”

Rubber-hose versions of Logico and Irratino appear.

“THE UNSTOPPABLE DEDUCTIVE LOGICO AND THE ESOTERIC INSPECTOR IRRATINO WILL ACCOMPANY YOU ON THE JOURNEY THROUGH THE THIRD SERIES AND NINTH SEASON OF THE MURDLE CARTOON, FILLED WITH ADVENTURE, EXCITEMENT, AAAAAAND MURDER!”

More graphics appear.

“WILL DEDUCTIVE LOGICO SOLVE THE ICE-COLD MURDERS OF THE SKI RESORT? OR WILL HE DIE TRYING??”

“THE DEDUCTIVE’S GREAT GREAT GRANDFATHER WAS AN OLD WEST RANGER, WHO WILL EXPLORE AN ABANDONED MINE IN THIS EXCITING EXPANSION OF THE FRANCHISE!!”

“THE DRAMATIC RETURN TO NEW AEGIS WILL PROVE THIS MEGA-MURDLE™️A SUREFIRE EMMY AWARDS CONTENDER!”

“AND JUST WHEN YOU THINK IT CAN’T GET BIGGER, LOGICO HEADS TO THE FINAL FRONTIER, TO SAVE THE MURDER KINGDOM FROM AN ALIEN INVASION!!!!!”

“BUCKLE UP, IT’S ABOUT TO BEGIN! IN 5… 4… 3… 2…”

Deductive Logico fades out of his stupid dream. He accidentally fell asleep again. He throws himself awake and continues jotting down notes on the latest mysterious letter, the only clue left behind from the sudden closing of the Investigation Institute. 

The next morning, when Inspector Irratino wakes, he’s still at it.

IRRATINO: Logico? LOGICO: What. IRRATINO: Have you slept? LOGICO: No.

The goat slowly gets out of bed and wanders over to the desk. Countless sheets of paper are scattered everywhere, covered in furious scribbles.

LOGICO: I’m not going… to stop working… until I find what this means.

He continues to weakly write incoherent letters on the pages while Irratino gets dressed. He is barely awake, and about to collapse again. He turns around, and Irratino is suddenly in the most hideous clashing outfit he’s ever seen.

LOGICO: EW!! WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?? IRRATINO: I’m taking you on vacation. LOGICO: No you’re not! What kind of vacation would warrant THAT outfit??

Irratino is wearing a bright green button-up shirt, a long black skirt, and sheepskin boots, and his hair is up in a ponytail.

IRRATINO: It’s good to be prepared for all climates. But I saw a great ad for the ski resort, and it just made me want to go back there.  LOGICO: Go ahead… enjoy the hypothermia… IRRATINO: No you don’t, Logico. You’re coming with me. I’m not letting you waste another second on that letter until you’ve relaxed. LOGICO: You’re not the boss of me… IRRATINO: Who does all your money come from? LOGICO: …

So he doesn’t have a choice. Irratino takes him to the ski resort. They immediately run into two humans - one is dead, and the other is Uncle Midnight.

U. MIDNIGHT: LOGIC, my man! I haven’t seen you in forever, the fuck you been doin’? 

He picks him up and gives him a strangling hug.

LOGICO: Wow. I am enjoying myself so much.  IRRATINO: Oh.

Two seconds into their supposed vacation, the boys have to solve a murder. Archaeologist Ecru is there, for some reason.

ECRU: Hey mate. I’m looking for rocks. They say there’s real gold around here, but I don’t believe ‘em. LOGICO: Then why are you looking? ECRU: …To prove ‘em wrong. LOGICO: Okay… and since when do you ski? U. MIDNIGHT: I don’t. Huhuhuh. Too much work. I just lounge in the freezing cold like a boss. Oh yeah but there is this new person I NEVER seen before, so you might wanna keep an eye on 'em. LOGICO: Who, Ecru? U. MIDNIGHT: Nuh, that one.

A flurry of snow sprays everyone in the face as a silhouette comes racing in - is someone skiing UPhill? And they takes off their helmet and flip their hair.

SUNFLOWER: Heyy~ ECRU: What, you think you’re hot or somethin’? SUNFLOWER: Ooh, who’s this girl~ Sounds like somebody’s JEALOUS~ U. MIDNIGHT: Fight! Fight! Fight! ECRU: Shut up, boy. SUNFLOWER: Oh no! The little girl is afraid~

Ecru sees the stupid squiggles they use instead of periods and has had enough. She shoves them over.

U. MIDNIGHT: Yessss

Logico tries to look for clues, but it’s hard with the snake and whatever Sunflower is swinging fists at each other nonstop. Ecru grabs Sun’s face and throws them into the restaurant.

U. MIDNIGHT: YEEEAAHHHHHH ECRU: Have a sip of this.

She tosses some hot chocolate at the supposed ski deity.

SUNFLOWER: Oh fuck that~

They dump an entire bowl of soup on Ecru’s head.

ECRU: AAAAAAUGH! YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!

Sunflower prances away with a giant grin on their face. 

U. MIDNIGHT: COME ON MANNN SUNFLOWER: What’s the matter? I know it’s hard to be alone~

They wraps their scarf around him.

SUNFLOWER: But maybe THIS, will help you feel better~

Benjamin ignores them and goes to see Ecru instead.

U. MIDNIGHT: You coulda beat the stupid person! ECRU: Ughh, I KNOW ALREADY!  LOGICO: I don’t care who ‘won’. I care about who did the fucking murder!! U. MIDNIGHT: Oh. That was me. LOGICO: Seriously?? U. MIDNIGHT: We had a dispute about resort fees! LOGICO: What dispute?? U. MIDNIGHT: He wanted me to pay ‘em, and I didn’t!

He sticks his tongue out and runs away like the mature adult he is, and Logico glares at Irratino.

LOGICO: I don’t… want… a vacation. IRRATINO: Chin up, Logico. I promise we're gonna be alright.

The end! 

if anyone has any design ideas for Sunflower lmk, I'm really stuck for some reason 😭 I only know what their hair and feet look like

The power of Goat Lord compels you!

See you next time murdlers!

[izloveshorses]

what the HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL what the hell what the hell what the hell whatthehellwhaththehellwhatthehell

[crescenthistory]

Haunt me then… MAGNIFICENT OH MY LORDDDD😭

REGULUS??? DONT GO LOOKING???? WHAT DO MEAN REGULUS ARCTURUS BLACK WHAT DO YOU MEAN DONT GO LOOKING. PETE MY SWEET BOY REAPED??? BARTY AND BELLATRIX ARE TOO WITTY. AND LAST BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST.

SIRIUS?? THE ANGST. THIS WAS SO LOVELY AND PAINFUL.

AAAAAHHHHH THANK YOUUUUUUUU !!!!

regulus. very suspicious. very mystical. the author has zero comments. barty and bella are about to be my fav duo 🫶 making sirius’ life helllllllllllllll

lovely and painful is exactly what i’m going for, thank you for reading and loving it my darling 🫂🤍

[andagon]

Good morning Helllllllllllllll!

This song goes to @the-metatron who is in labour …

The high scores emphasise … well, you can feel for yourself what they emphasise, just like the wild guitar solo.

Stay strong, @angelo-rib-shack @kleenexwoman hot water! @amagnificentobsession

[ballwizard]

What the f uck is that

WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

[kiiraes]

what the helllllllllllllll THIS WHOLE TIME IT WAS FLIPPED AND I DIDNT EVEN NOTICE IM GONNA KILL MYSELF

[oralsadism]

WHAT THE HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

CHAPPELL ROAN arriving at the VMAs — September 11, 2024

[personaei]

ooc. okay real talk rn why the absolute living fuck is finding a psd coloring for kairi so much harder than finding a psd coloring for goofy when they are objectively in the exact same media and sometimes in the same goddamned shot i am trying to turn into a graphic what the helllllllllllllll okay sorry i'm calm i'm calm i'm handling four hours of meetings today normally.