#WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN CIS IS A SLUR?

[cowboy-like-moony]

transphobes are so stupid they make me want to violently bang my head into a wall

[februarys-wednesday]

tiktok i’m taking slur discourse away from you until you can remember what the difference between pronouns and gender expression vs gender identity is

[teleomancer]

.

[snekdood]

oh you want to force the label "butch" on to me? well looks like its time to go back to strictly fucking cis men

[jojotichakorn]

listen, as much as i would love to be bubbly and friendly to everyone, i'm sometimes kind of glad a lot of people perceive me as intimidating because i have such an easy time shutting down bullshit simply because they are genuinely scared of what i might say

[gods-no-longer-tread-here]

oh another little detail about Nimona that fucked me up:

I thought Bal refusing to call Nimona a monster, instead saying “You know what you are”, was him struggling with caring about her but also fearing her. After further thought, no.

It’s respectability politics.

He’s a cis, presumably gay man, who lived his whole life in the same confines as Ambrosius. The same rules, the same “don’t be Weird, don’t be Defiant, Kill Monsters On Sight”. Just because he was expelled for being accused of being the wrong kind of gay murder doesn’t mean he isn’t still chockful of “I need to be accepted by the people in power.”

Which always, always results in trying to be more straight than straight people, more cis than the cis. It’s part of why the ‘queer is a slur’ bullshit spread so far. “Monster” replaces “queer” in that scene. Bal can’t bring himself to call his friend a word that he has since learned is painful and was used to hurt her, but he still means it. He won’t let it out of his mouth, but he still means it, with the same spitting hate as everyone else.

Monster. Queer. Faggot. Dyke. Tranny.

Bal still hated That One Part Of Her. He loved Nimona, his friend and ally, but she was Monster, and just like all the “LGB without the T” fuckheads, he was scared Nimona’s transness would drag him down even further. He still wanted to assimilate, be accepted.

It’s impossible to do that. We are not different. Cis people are not “more acceptable” than trans. Gays and lesbians are not “more acceptable” than bi, pan, and ace people. We’re all monsters to the people who hate us. Stop polishing their boots with your tongue and fight.

[ceilidhtransing]

I feel like so much shitty discourse could be avoided if people more consciously bore in mind the fact that Mainstream Society and The Queer Community are, you know, meaningfully different spaces that often have different social phenomena and different issues.

Random example, there'll be a discussion about femininity often being prized over masculinity, especially transmasculinity, in some queer spaces. And there'll be a bunch of transmasculine people talking about being made to feel unwelcome once they came out, feeling pressured to identify as nonbinary rather than as a binary man as that receive less hostility, being increasingly isolated and othered once they started T, feeling pressured to act more feminine and GNC, being told that their presence as a man makes others in the space uncomfortable, etc.

And then inevitably someone will respond with something like “OP what fucking planet are you on. You're fucking insane if you think femininity is prized over masculinity in society. And the idea that nonbinary people have privilege over binary trans people - what is this fucking enbyphobic bullshit? God, some people are so stuck in an echo chamber of terminally online tumblr queers with their invented problems that they've forgotten what it's like in the real world.”

But was the discussion about wider mainstream society? Or was it very particularly about the queer community and issues that these people have faced specifically within that community?

The queer community is a subculture (arguably many subcultures but let's try to keep it simple), and it's totally, utterly standard for subcultures to - even deliberately, as an act of pushback - value different things from the mainstream culture. Aesthetics thought of as “weird” or “[insert slur here]” by the mainstream can be highly prized in the queer community. Identities that are all thought of as equally “fucked-up” and “cringe” by the mainstream can find themselves organised into some weird hierarchy of validity and oppressed-ness within the community. Politics which are considered extremely fringe and radical by the mainstream can be considered the default norm, even a necessity, in the queer community. Gender expressions that are seen as the most basic “normal” thing ever in the mainstream can be devalued by the queer community for “not looking queer enough” or “being straight-passing”. And none of this is a contradiction because this is pretty much how subcultures operate! They assert different values and cultural norms from the culture they exist within and that's partly what makes them subcultures.

So if someone's pointing out “I face this issue specifically when I'm interacting with queer spaces”, it doesn't do the conversation any good to assume that they're talking about mainstream society and attack them for “being deluded about how the real world works” or “inventing fake problems to sound more oppressed” or something. (And the inverse - someone pointing out “I face this issue when I'm interacting with the mainstream” and someone else responding with “I don't know what you're talking about; I never face that issue at all [in my exclusively queer friend group and support network]” - is far rarer, but it does still happen, and it's just as unhealthy for the discussion. Probably the most common example of this I can think of is when cis gay and lesbian people discuss homophobia they've faced, for instance to do with their gender expression, and someone goes “but that doesn't happen, because actually cis gays are a privileged group and I've never seen anyone attack their presentations” - yes, because the frame of reference you're using is the queer community, where being gay is pretty much the expected default, and you're forgetting that in mainstream society, even cisgender gays and lesbians are by no means “a privileged group” that experiences no oppression ever.)

People need to be able to discuss issues in the specific social contexts they're talking about without it being basically guaranteed that someone will misinterpret them and start jumping down their throat in anger at something that wasn't even said or implied. It is so bad for the community when people seemingly can't fathom that the dynamics at play might be different within queer spaces versus out in mainstream society and it leads to so much pointless toxicity and aggressive misunderstanding.

[velvetvexations]

genuinely feel like i'm going insane like. i remember when "theyfab" was coined. it was some 4chan shit! it absolutely was not a "punching up at transmisogynists" thing because it was coined by cis transphobes! i remember seeing posts using "theyfab/theymab" and "shemale" in the same breath! not that many years ago!! why are we (general) pretending it has this valorous history of protecting trans women!!!!!!

You know what's really ironic? Transradfems also tried doing this with "femboy", right down to it having been a term originating on 4chan, except to claim that it's a slur that was only ever meant to refer to them and no one else can use it in it's actual meaning for themselves.

They can't go five fucking minutes without stealing the language of other queer people. They tell people to read theory because their entire framework is a mausoleum built from the bones of people they've ran over with their yawning abyss of unoriginality.

[dropoutfailure]

ok, enough wholesome dadson. time to sexualize terrible fathers. (cw for: dadson incest + FtM son POV + transphobia / misgendering / fetishizing / forcemasc)

transphobic dad: doesn't approve of you transitioning or taking T, but isn't stopping you and doesn't seem turned off by the changes, even after you pass consistently as a man. doesn't know how T even works, always lowkey curious about the changes. he does like that you're so much hornier on T and don't even have periods anymore. tugs at your facial hair (ow? wtf :/) and goes "huh? it's real? I thought you drew it on every morning!" with a hearty laugh. dad joke? he might have actually thought so. backhanded praise, mean jokes at your expense, and moments where he genders you correctly, by accident.

thought you would eventually change your mind and give up transitioning "when you realise that being a man is hard," as if he's not the one making it hard. he might actually think of you as a son at some point, but he was never taught to apologize, he's "always right," he's stubborn, so he will keep calling you a daughter because a father can't show weakness. wants to call you homophobic slurs sooo bad, but that would be admitting defeat.

gets angry when you bring up surgery bc he likes to squeeze your tits and fuck your pussy. won't do any anal because it's gay. and clearly, he's isn't, he says. definitely closeted.

trans boy chaser dad: for better or for worse, only took an interest in your life when he found out you're a trans guy, fixed his relationship with you by treating you more like a date than as his son.

excited, touchy-feely, even creepy. eager to please. just pathetically horny for the way your body's changing from T - he won't misgender you. you get aggressively reaffirmed to the point of it getting annoyingly patronizing actually. regardless, he fucks you hard, encouraging you to moan with your cracking voice, and is too horny to feel bad about the incest. it's a welcome change from the previous emotional distance, but you feel used, like he's taking advantage of your newly high libido.

fixated on your body and everything "clockable," would rather you didn't get any surgery... says you're already perfect as is, from just testosterone... it does feel nice that he takes some sort of pride in having a son now, fully embracing you, the way he finds even all the awkward changes (sparse facial hair, voice cracks etc) not just endearing, not just attractive, but really fucking hot. and it's a relief for your body which craves that release. but. dad might just completely lose interest a few years into T, if you pass consistently.

bisexual, he says. but of course not into cis men.

transmed dad: thinks he knows what's best for your body, forcemascs you in his own ideals, pushing you to work hard to speed up your transition, to become a "real" man. you were so happy that dad accepted you being a trans guy so wholeheartedly and proudly, but the acceptance seems to have turned into overbearing surveillance...

dad insists on doing your T injections himself, because he doesn't trust that you'll actually do them. "no son of mine will be a fucking embarrassing softboy pansy who never transitions for real, have some dignity, god damn it! either you transition fully or you don't transition at all!" ...he pushes you to consider top and bottom surgery asap, to become a "real man," regardless of what you might want. he very excitedly looks forward to the day you can top him with your real cock, like a son should. :)

he makes you like anal because that's how real men do it. you're absolutely not allowed to derive any pleasure from anywhere but your ass and T-dick, and the phantom sensation of a strapon. he's good at working your T-dick though, it's all almost worth it just for that...

love, validation, and praise only when you've "earned it." if you fail to live up to his strict expectations, the things he says fucking hurt. misgenders you as punishment and threatens to withhold your testosterone "since you want to stay a girl so bad."

......

so, all of these options leave you feeling unsatisfied and degraded in one way or another!! yippee! no, there's no option for a Normal About Trans Men And Masculinity Dad, this is the Terrible Fathers dadson poll. you must choose.

[that-one-kiddo-in-the-back]

Slurred speech... Queer bad.

I've been wanting to talk about this for a pretty long time

Props to her for putting content warnings. This is her. "I hate the word queer so everyone else should" video. For the purpose of this post, I'll be saying Queer since no one else has a problem with it besides me. I'll go into saying I don't like the word Queer because my conservative boomer parents use it as a slur, and I've only ever known the word to be used as a negative. So I'm not too keen on being called Queer. However, that doesn't mean I'll yell "ThAt'S a SlUr." When someone else in the LGBTQ+ uses it. Free speech and all that.

We start the video with an SU mention and how people weren't too keen on her calling the word Queer a "slur" when it's been reclaimed for quite a while now.

Anyway, she brings up how there are two arguments towards using Queer A) who want to use it as a self identifier for their own reasons and B) who want to use it as an umbrella for the community as a whole because the community is to specific and it needs to be all-encompassing and guess what side she hates the most. if you guess B, then you'd be right. Here's the thing I think that the LGBTQ has way too many letters, and some people don't fully know who they are, only that they aren't straight or cis, so to use Queer as an umbrella to get the point across that the person isn't cis or straight isn't that bad of a thing but this video isn't about telling cis straight people they can't use Queer this is telling people in the community they can't say Queer.

Something bonkers about this video is that she compared the use of the word Queer to the nazi word degenerate, saying they are one in the same. Which lily not all things relate to the Nazis.

Rocky horror is the Bain of Lily’s existence. She brings in her straw man (Billy), who asks the important question of "isn't it's history as an LGBTQ term important to consider?" To which Lily sets that wicker man on fire by bringing up Rocky horror. I'll confess that I have never seen Rocky horror, and at this point, I refuse to watch it simply because Tim Curry (It's because I don't like gross horror that involves SA), but regardless. Since I haven't watched Rocky horror, I'll be skipping over it. Other people would have better takes on it anyway. I will say that she thinks that SU, glee, and RuPaul's drag race are just as gross as Rocky horror... which how? I don't know shit about Glee, but how is drag racing gross?

Billy brings up how Queer was reclaimed, just like how black people reclaimed the N-slur, which Lily says isn't the same thing. Now I can blend in with snow, and I'm not gonna tell black people what they can or can't say, but Lily is "native," so it's fair for her

So sorry, black people, the pertendian has spoken you can't use the N-slur. 🤷

She says how no black person uses the N-slur to another person... which, like from experience of being outside and around others, I can personally tell you that black people are definitely calling other black people the N-slur. I used to live in California, and the N-slur was the most common thing you will hear when you're in the lunch line. Lily, you can tell people in your own community what they can or can't say but for the love of Freya stay in your fucking lane and don't tell other cultures what they can or can't say because that makes you just as bad as the people who try to silence them.

Back to the main video. Lily goes on a rant about "how dare the younger gays say Queer when people in the 60s were beaten to death while Queer was being yelled at them or the people who were called Queer as a slur and is disgusted that some idiot kids would have the nerve to say that everything is okay now" which people aren't doing no one is telling a person who has been called Queer to shut up and deal with it because it's reclaimed. I feel like Lily has confused the word Queer to the F-slur, which is far more dangerous than Queer.

The whole video is just Lily whining about Queer bad questioning good throughout the whole video it made it seem like people reclaiming Queer are gonna move onto the F-slur and force LGBTQ people to use that which isn't what's happening no one is being forced to use Queer as an identification of being in the LGBTQ. She brings up Queer studys as something that a gross person would study completely, ignoring the study itself.

Whether you like it or not Queer has been reclaimed, and you can either swim with it or drown.

[beautifulblooms]

can i please have a ghost x male reader fic based on bad habit by steve lacy. yeah. yueah. go on. fuck youj. fuck you you son of a fucking bitch,,. PENDEJO. ПИДОР СДОХНИ МАТЬ ТВОЮ ЕБАЛ ДЕДУШКУ НА ХУЮ ВЕРТЕЛ БАБУШКУ В ЖОПУ ЕБАЛ ВСЮ СЕМЬЮ В СТРАТОСФЕРУ ЗАПУСТИЛ СИЛОЙ СВОЕГО ХУЯ УЕБАН ТЫ БЕЗМОЗГЛЫЙ В ДЕТСТВЕ ГВОЗДИ ЗАБИВАЛИ БАШКОЙ ТВОЕЙ ЕБАНОЙ ЧТОБ ТЫ УМЕР

Never Gave Me Time of Day, My Dear - Simon "Ghost" Riley x John "Soap" Mactavish (implied) + Male! Sergeant! Reader

Very important side note about the request itself, everything said was a joke and wasn't genuinely meant as an insult to me. If anyone thinks it's okay to send me threats, insults, or slurs in my inbox that isn't my friend and expresses it as a joke will be blocked immediately

ehehe, I had too much fun with this, it's not super sad but it's just kind of...ouchie, anyways, enjoy more Bad Habit fics, I love making people cry <3

CIS Women and Female Aligned people, please DNI, this story and all of my others are for non-binary, masculine aligned and male readers!

Leaving his room in the barracks, (y/n) wasn’t paying attention to the world around him, too emotionally distraught. Of course, it was stupid of him to fall for his lieutenant, but he couldn’t help it, he was stern on and off the field, but was kind with (y/n), patient, and helpful with him too. Heading straight for one of the training rooms he put in his earbuds and played a random playlist, Bad Habit by Steve Lacy starting to play as he pulled the dummy out of the corner. Getting into a fighting stance (y/n) started to throw hits at the training dummy, the lyrics blasting in his ears as images of Ghost and Soap being cuddled up in the common room flooded his mind. “I wish I knew you wanted me. I wish I knew. I wish I knew you wanted me. I wish I knew. I wish I knew you wanted me. What you, ooh, uh, what you do? Made a move, could've made a move. If I knew I'd be with you, is it too late to pursue?” As the song continued to play, (y/n) could feel tears fill his eyes while things started to piece together in his head. All the times that Ghost would show up late to training and seem more flustered and sloppy during sparring…him leaving the common room the moment Soap would show up and barely even wave at him. 

“I bite my tongue, it's a bad habit. Kinda mad that I didn't take a stab at it, thought you were too good for me, my dear. Never gave me time of day, my dear. It's okay, things happen for reasons that I think are sure, yeah.” The tears gathering in his eyes started to spill as he kept punching and kicking at the dummy, his movements sloppy and fueled by anger and sadness. Was Ghost leading him on, on purpose? Was it a mistake or did the lieutenant mean to play with (y/n)’s heart like that? 

“I wish I knew, I wish I knew you wanted me, I wish I knew, I wish I knew oh, I wish I knew you wanted me. I wish I knew, Yeah, I wish I knew you wanted me, oh. I wish I knew, I wish I knew you wanted me. Please say to me, please, just say to me. If you still want it I wish you wouldn't play with me, I wanna know, I wanna know.” His knuckles were surely bruised and splitting at this point but he couldn’t care less, only needing to get his anger out one way or another…(y/n) didn’t even know if it was anger at himself or anger at Ghost for leading him on.

“Can I bite your tongue like my bad habit? Would you mind if I tried to make a pass at it? No, you're not too good for me, my dear, funny you come back to me, my dear. It's okay, things happen for reasons that I can't ignore, yeah. I wish I knew, I wish I knew you wanted me. I wish I knew, wish I knew, I wish I knew you wanted me, oh.” Ghost stood in the doorway of the training room, hoping to come see (y/n) and train with him, but seeing the sergeant in such a distraught Ghost frowned behind his balaclava and left. He’d never seen (y/n) so…upset, so emotionally driven to go as far as hurting himself to relieve the anger. 

“You can't surprise a Gemini, I wish I knew. I'm everywhere, I'm cross-eyed, and, I wish I knew you wanted me. Now that you're back, I can't decide, I wish I knew. If I decide if you're invited, I wish I knew you wanted me. You always knew the way to wow me. Fuck around, get tongue-tied, and I turn it on, I make it rowdy. Then carry on, but I'm not hidin', You grabbin' me hard 'cause you know what you found. It's biscuits, it's gravy, babe.” (y/n) hadn't even known that Ghost had been in the training room, too focused on getting rid of the sinking feeling of his heart breaking…he really was a fool, a fool for falling in love with someone who was taken…someone he could never have.

[scrambledd3ggss]

guys I’m really scared

not so much for my rights- I mean yes I am a woman, but I’m a white woman who isn’t attracted to anyone of any gender and therefore doesn’t need to worry about marriage. Whose also cis- but I’m really fucking worried about my friends

Will my best friend not be able to eventually marry her girlfriend? Will my other friend not get to transition? Will one of my friends be getting slurs shout at her for being a woman of color? im scared for you guys too. My Mutuals on the internet, strangers on the internet.

i mean sure I live in a blue state, but Christ my town is HORRIBLE. I cant ride the bus without seeing a Trump sign on every fucking doorstep.

and the people at school are going to be horrible. Im scared of what they’ll do to other queer students or people of color at my school.

[ultimateloserboy]

since its pride month im providing my hot take (thats actually a joke but still) i absolutely HATE IT when people are like “haha duck would be homophobic”. not because i dont agree with queer people making those jokes, but because it doesnt give him enough credit when it comes to his assholery. making fun of someone for being gay is so lame and overdone. this man is the type to forgive you for being gay but NOT your haircut!!!! he wont aim for the stupid shit like blue hair and pronouns, oh no, he’ll aim lower. he’ll aim so low he’ll be sifting through your family photos to see which family member d/ed to make fun of you for it. he’ll be the type to say “he should be hit by a bus” and when corrected he’ll go “oh. my apologies. she should be hit by a bus” with no emphasis on the “she” either cuz thats not the part he was trying to get across. he wont be condescending about that kind of stuff, he’ll be condescending about the uglyass boots youre wearing today. or the way your eyelashes are fucked up. he cant judge you for who you are or what you like, hes a drag queen that kisses household appliances, but he absolutely can judge you for that one pimple you tried to hide that you’re incredibly insecure about that you popped and now its scarring and he’s laughing and pointing at you and all that kinda stuff. also the guy hes into is a naked man with nothing up or down (if you know what i mean) so the idea of him being transphobic is laughable. especially paired with the fact that THERE IS ALMOST LITERALLY NOBODY CANONICALLY WITH BIO SEXES!! LIKE WHY WOULD HE BAT AN EYE AT A GUY WITH BOOBS WHEN HES SURROUNDED BY STRANGER, LESS HUMAN MEN!? i could go on all day about how gender as a concept in dhmis is nowhere near the cis ideology but the main point im making is that when the computer tells duck “hey imma boy” hes like “shit me too brother, but i dont have those bigass teeth tho LMAOOOOO!!!”

also extra point hed be the type of guy to get arrested for something serious and be like “god forbid A GAY MAN do ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!” and def reclaims gay slurs like. he is the type to wear the “THATS MR F//GOT TO YOU!!” shirt and red guy has to tell him not to (although i highly doubt they have slurs in their world cuz theyve suffered enough)

[catoperated]

Saw a post where someone described something as lame, a bunch of people in the comments said it was a slur, and a bunch more replied “how can that possibly be a slur.”

I’ll tell you… under the cut.

So let’s talk about ableist slurs.

There are a lot. Some terms relate to specific conditions. When you do a google search for “pinhead” the top results are all about Hellraiser. People who use it to describe someone as being stupid probably have no idea of its actual origin.

As a slur, it refers to people with microcephaly. People with small and/oddly shaped heads were a big draw at freak shows of the past. Oh yeah, “freak” is ableist, too. People fight back hard against that one. Y’know because they’re better than those freaks who like the wrong cartoon or whatever (sarcasm).

Lame refers to being unable to walk properly for whatever reason. You might’ve heard of lame horses, but even wiktionary outright calls using it to describe disabled people as dated and offensive.

Dumb was synonymous with mute in the past, which usually meant non-verbal autistics. “Blind, deaf, and dumb” was once a medical term referring to people who could neither see, hear, nor talk. Helen Keller was described as that, and before anyone gets into TikTok conspiracies, I’ve got a video for you. Was Hellen Keller a fraud?

No, but abled people on TikTok just can’t seem to wrap their heads around the concept of formerly non-communicative person, given the proper tools, being so eloquent. Hell, I can barely touch type on a standard keyboard, so I rely a lot on my phone’s assistive tools to do most of the work for me. Leads to very weird typos sometimes.

And yes, while I’m on the subject, I’m sick and tired of people using predictive text as an excuse to justify generative AI models built off stolen data and art. When people say “fuck AI” they mean that kind of AI, and to act otherwise is to be deliberately obtuse.

I debated if “obtuse” was a little to close to “stupid,” which I try to avoid. I personally wouldn’t go so far as to forbid people from using more general terms like that, or phrases like “are you blind”—I’m too tired to be combative about it when I’m constantly having to prove I’m disabled (they act like I’ll wake up one day miraculously cured from cerebral palsy) to keep my benefits, but alternatives like ridiculous are right fucking there. Expand your damn vocabulary. Please.

I feel like I need a break before the next part, so here’s one of my cats. His name is Riley.

(ID in Alt text, unless tumblr ate it again)

Maybe you think this post is ridiculous. I don’t care. I grew up being called a spaz and having people tap their hands to their chest to mock me—I’m not even quadriplegic, I’m diplegic, but I guess that’s just the universal sign for the r-slur.

Wild that we finally reached the point that “retarded” is widely accepted as not cool to say, but commenters on YouTubr using “regarded” as a stand-in for it is just… I don’t know, lazy?

All this is just me trying to distract myself from the fact I’m in the path of the hurricane and the lights are already flickering. The basement is most definitely going to flood even if it only wings us, and I do not look forward to dealing with that.

I have no bread, milk, or eggs because of the grand southern tradition of making a run on grocery stores when bad weather looms. I always wondered what people did when they ended up with an excess after it passed—make a shitload of French toast? idk I’m stress-digressing here.

Oh, and because we have to keep saying it, cripples can reclaim any and all of these words, but ableds cannot. I’ve seen people argue that abled, like cis, sounds like a slur, when it’s literally what cis able people are—able-bodied, cisgender, the “standard.”

And we all know how people can get when faced anyone who goes against that white, able, neurotypical, cisgender, straight “standard.”

Imagine me making air quotes with that, cause people treating those traits as being “normal” are so… droll. (sarcasm again)

[trans-bastard-dude]

oh great i saw something that made me mad, buckle up it’s rant time.

Transmedicalism is dumb. the idea that we have to tie shit to medical bs is dumb. you don’t need gender dysphoria to be trans, that’s fucking stupid

“but you’re making trans people look bad” we already look bad. being trans is a form of being queer. lgbt were called queer as a slur at the start, queer fucking means WEIRD. we are, in the society as it stands, fucking weirdos. own it. be the weird bastard you were born to be

“but being trans has lead to me suffering so much it must be a medical thing!” nah. you suffer because your situation is utter ass. i do not need to fit into your silly ass box to be trans, i’m me and me trans. you’re dysphoria and situation being terrible doesn’t mean everyone else’s should be.

the idea that dysphoria is needed to be trans is also dumb because like… cis people get it to. let’s say for example that a woman gets a double mastectomy due to cancer, she might feel like shit after and feel better after getting breast implants, that’s a form of gender dysphoria, but she ain’t trans is she?

and it only takes certain types of dysphoria and euphoria into account, like what about the tran gals who feel the most like women when they’re being tomboys? it’s all just so… STUPID

like come ON, why do i need to suffer to be? i suffer enough, let me be me. if you class your existence by your suffering, you will die a broken person. i do not need to suffer to be a man.

if you follow my page and are a trans med, truscum, whatever the fuck you call yourselves, leave and don’t let the door hit you on your way out.

may this post become a blocklist for all those who are sane as i am.

[aromantic-diaries]

a ton of aromantic heterosexual cis men, at least in uni, are awful. two of them were my friends. i trusted them, we bonded over them saying they were both straight aroallos and I was a bisexual oriented aroace and we got along so well. then one of them added me on accident (or maybe "on accident") to a group chat where they were like a group of like the european equivalent of frat guys and they were making fun of my identity and talking about my 'tight pussy' (cause I'm a virgin, I guess). i scrolled up and one of them was on grinder hooking up with pre-transition trans men because they're "easy" and apparently can be easily convinced to not use a condom. he didn't see any of them as men, just as tomboy-ish looking girls. he was also sending screenshots of some of the cis or cis-passing guys and calling them slurs.

I don't want these people in the queer community, i got them to join our gsa and they were talking shit about that too. i dont know what their goal with me was, clearly they were just mocking me and the queer community. maybe eventually they wanted to try to have sex with me or something, idk. but after that experience i genuinely do not trust cishet aroallo men.... its like saying that polish people should be allowed into spaces for "ethnic minorities" as theyre called here. like they might be a little oppressed. but also theyre all so racist and theyd make the space much worse for the more oppressed people who are strongly affected (like african immigrants) and can't just change their surnames to escape xenophobia.

Alright, before I even say anything I need to specify that I am not trying to invalidate your experience or go "not all men" on you, and I'm not defending these men.

What I do need to say is that any category of people will have shitty people without exception. These guys you talked about are shitty people without a doubt. But using polish people being racist as an example kind of falls flat because while that is true a lot of the time, it doesn't mean that their problems don't deserve to be fixed just cause a lot of these individuals are bad. I don't know the people you've talked about so I can't jump to any conclusions about them but listen. They weren't like that because they were cishet men who were aromantic, they were like that because they were shitty people, labels aside. And I'm sorry but queerness, or any minority status is not an indicator of morality. A lot of queer people fucking suck. A lot of them are terrible people. Someone can be a minority and still have their own -isms and -phobias against other minorities and that does not fucking mean they no longer deserve to live in a more progressive world or have any type of sympathy for their struggles. And yeah the polish people thing is uh... Yikes, I would have kept that to myself if I were you