#WAY OFF THE RAILS LMAO

[ihavesomejays]

text transcription:

Many springs ago, I perceived a sea of flowers upon a lake. I thought to myself that those fleeting colors held indescribable beauty.

The next time I perceived those colors was many years later, when the medic’s tent had blinded me to all but red. The radiance of that shining star was lost on my eyes.

Now, my eyes no longer perceive the subtleties in the colors around me.

But I am content.

For I can now see the most brilliant colors in my universe.

anyways yeah why did they fucking do that to jiaoqiu bro

the planning for this experimentalish comic is under keep reading

[avnasace]

its very irritating interesting to see a lot of people hating aventurine, like yes hes sly and seems like this rich guy who cares about nothing else but money, but ironically he hasnt really lied to us so far, or screwed us over, in comparison to some other characters hes actually been honest and helpful and at least we know his motives.

also theres the whole 'he was a slave who didnt get an education and his family probably died horrible deaths' thing, and after all that he managed to crawl his way to the top of the ipc ladder by himself, aka the people who (presumably) enslaved him.

like??? of course hes not going to be a warm person helping you out of the kindness of his heart, he (presumably) got enslaved and most people who meet him are racist as fuck like???? what do people expect

also ironic the amount of people wanting darker/morally grey characters and moaning theyre not all Good or simping over TB 24/7

like just say you cant handle complex characters and go.

[magentagalaxies]

Kids in the Archive: Episode 10

welcome back to kids in the archive! to celebrate my college graduation + KITA's 10th installment + finally honor the request i received from @oliviaskithworld multiple months ago (thank you for your patience!) today i'm going to be showcasing the classic s1e3 sketch "Citizen Kane"

even if there are other sketches that i would choose as my personal favorite, i respect "citizen kane" so much as a feat of comedic timing. the premise and dialogue are funny enough, but what puts them over the top is the perfect rhythm kevin and dave establish - fast-paced dialogue that's occasionally repetitive in its text but each repetition leads to escalation in the performance.

Citizen Kane: June 3rd 1989

I actually have two copies of the script for Citizen Kane: both dated 06/03/89, and nearly identical, to each other and to the version of the sketch that aired. There really aren't many differences to point out: some sentences are shorter or longer for the purpose of timing, and there is one specific line missing from the "white" pages that's present in the "pink" pages

i assume the version i have may not be a first draft - this was likely a scene performed at the rivoli for years before making it to the screen. or perhaps this scene was mostly created via improv, so the first time on paper was less an act of creation and more documenting what already existed. the only "big" changes are removing a section of brief physical comedy before picking up the newspaper (which was not being held by another customer).

honestly, as much as i wish i could've honored this request in a timely manner, the wait has allowed this episode to be so much better. this could have been it. i would have had to stretch these tiny differences into 3 bullet points because i just couldn't show you how the sketch evolved. except, as i write this on december 21st 2024, now i can. but we have to push a bit further...

Citizen Kane: ~2002

the kids in the hall tour-film "tour of duty" was unavailable to stream for most of this year before finally being reuploaded by a fan in november. i've previously put out a full essay with general thoughts on tour of duty, but let's examine the show's version of citizen kane.

tour of duty's "citizen kane" barely changes, especially compared to some of the other sketches in this show. sure, the words don't always line up exactly and the rhythm is a bit slower (a product of enunciating for a large theater vs recording a sketch for television), but most changes are physical. in the original sketch, a fake-arm was made for dave foley for the purposes of stabbing his hand. in this one, a prop-knife was used for the effect, freeing up both hands for motioning. most notably, this version ends with dave falling out of his chair and flipping 360 degrees before landing on the floor.

immediately following the sketch is a transitional scene with bruce and mark, where they essentially replicate the "citizen kane" bit of forgetting a name and refusing to admit you're wrong, only this time they're trying to remember the name of the sketch they just watched. it's cute.

Citizen Kane: November 25th 2024

so that's all well and good, but still not a lot of differences to parse through. what would it take for them to take citizen kane in a completely different direction?

well, what if 22 years later the kids in the hall reunited to put on a show in support of paul bellini's medical expenses, but dave foley wasn't able to attend due to pneumonia and the other kids barely had time to rehearse?

a high-quality version of the full show will be available in the new year, but recently i found a fan's uploads of a few iconic sketches from the november 2024 show, including the perfect finale to my citizen kane post, because oh boy did they go off-script. for starters, the original "citizen kane" as uploaded onto youtube is 4 minutes and 16 seconds. the "tour of duty" version (not counting bruce and mark's tag) is just under 6 minutes long. the november 2024 version is NEARLY TEN MINUTES LONG

and uniquely i am actually in a position to explain how these changes happened: scott was chosen to take over dave's part in the sketch the day of the show. they added mark walking on as "constable bobby" as a way to acknowledge dave's absence (and i was actually riffing with mark, kevin, and scott when they decided the character's name. in rehearsal, mark improvised a bit about his character going undercover as a teenager). but scott responding to kevin's "was it citizen kane?" with "yes"? bruce walking on as another officer? kevin kissing scott's forehead when scott apologized for forgetting his line? that was all truly improvised, and i was standing backstage watching it happen.

prior to the show, citizen kane was one of the sketches scott was the most nervous about since it's actually quite difficult to memorize: so much of the comedy relies on repetition and timing. i've probably watched the sketch more times in the past year than he has and even i wouldn't get it word-for-word. but once you're out there onstage, you can't beat yourself up over forgetting a line. you make that part of the gag, and suddenly the sketch becomes citizen kane on top of citizen kane: a sketch about someone forgetting something and ignoring their friend's corrections becomes about scott forgetting his lines and ignoring kevin's corrections.

there's no way the kids in the hall could've replicated everything about citizen kane on the evening of november 25th 2024: the sketch was at least 35 years old, it was being performed with minimal sets and costumes in a 1500-seat theater, and the person whose comedic voice it most represented wasn't around. but in my opinion, citizen kane 2.0 reflects exactly what a live version of a pre-existing kids in the hall sketch should be: using the well-known framework as a basis for improv while still being grounded to the important beats. this attitude carried over into the night's other sketches, even ones which didn't feature dave at all like "salty ham." it gives fans new and old something new to appreciate, and allows the KITH to focus on making each other laugh. after scott got off the stage, he wasn't upset for flubbing citizen kane. he was smiling ear-to-ear, whispering to me "i forgot how fun this was". i would take this over "tour of duty" any day

or maybe i'm just saying that because i now own 2024 citizen kane's prop-knife

oh, and don't think i've forgotten the one line that changed between my two scripts, both dated 06/03/89.

"that's a hayley mills vehicle, that's not even close"

and because of scott's role in the 2024 show, i now know that's the one line HE contributed, leading me to believe the "white" pages were just kevin and dave's writing, and the "pink" pages were after the input of the other KITH on the same day.

god, i love how things become full-circle.

...

PREVIOUS KIDS IN THE ARCHIVE EPISODES:

Episode 1 - armada finale ("do we make it?") Episode 2 - fran & gordon: the vacation Episode 3 - comfortable Episode 4 - cathy & kathi: is he? Episode 5 - danny husk: kidnapped! Episode 6 - trappers Episode 7 - sizzlers & the bank Episode 8 - darcy & francesca Episode 9 - show within a show

thanks for reading!

[altschmerzes]

omgggg shipping is not arophobic in the LEAST but keep making us look like whiners with no real problems by continuing to complain about it I guess

yeah that's definitely what i said in any post ever man great job

average person who has made shipping their entire identity will see a post where someone says 'hey please don't say these specific types of things that are degrading and cruel about nonromantic relationships while enjoying your ships and maybe examine the thought processes and beliefs and prejudices that led to saying them' and be like 'oh so you're a whiner with no real problems who thinks shipping is arophobic?'

telling on yourself there bud

[darehearts]

me staring at today's date like  :  already  ?!  TOMORROW IS JIM'S BIRTHDAY  ?!  my man is turning 33  ?!  🥹💛

[determunition]

hey man!! I love your OLD_FOLKS_HOME fic (and your retyrement AU in general). I was wondering if you could give us literally like, any other facts about the retyrement mycologists? I’m very much obsessed with their designs/the small bits of character we’ve gotten so far. hope you have a good day!!

hi there! thanks so much :D really appreciate all your interest!!

your retyrement mycologist fact of the day is... the taller myco doesn't have a driver's license, the smaller one drives them everywhere in his mushroom-themed vehicle that he also does rideshare service with on the side lmao

[hemlockalope]

I'm having fun on HSR chat maker (Lost post below!!) Website I used: https://hsrchat.pages.dev/

and by having fun i mean making jiaoqiu angst

Text format: Jiaoqiu: Sushang, guess who's on the Luofu~ Sushang: Uncle Jiaoqiu!! Really?! We should meet up soon then! Sushang: I miss your cooking! (Sushang send an emote of herself throwing a chicken) Sushang: Though not the spicy ones, haha... Jiaoqiu: Of course, haha Jiaoqiu: I'm going to be busy with the General the next few days on official business Jiaoqiu: But I should be free before we go back to the Yaoqing! Sushang: Great!! Sushang: Oh, will it be okay if I bring a friend? Jiaoqiu: Of course! Invite whoever you want Jiaoqiu: Just let me know how much I should cook Sushang: Okay thank you! Sushang: She'll want to try your spiciest hotpot, I don't know if she'll be able to finish it though Jiaoqiu: That'll be great! I always make the spiciest for myself, there'll just be more for me haha Sushang: I seriously don't understand your spice levels... (Sushang sends an emote of Pom Pom scared) (Jiaoqiu send an emote of Pom Pom dancing) (A few days later) Sushang: Hey!! How has your time on the Luofu been? Sushang: and when would be the best time to meet up!! (Sushang send an emote of Pom Pom excitedly waving) (A few hours later...) Sushang: Uncle J? Sushang: You're probably busy with the General Sushang: Sorry for bothinger you!! (A day later...) Sushang:... Sushang: The cloud knights announced that a messenger from the Yaoqing has been taken hostage. Sushang: Please don't be you Sushang: please text me if your okay (A day later...) Sushang: Uncle J, the Cloud Knights said you're still missing. Taken by the borisin Sushang: Please be safe Sushang: I called my mom too. We're both worried, please text me if you can

[chryblossomjjk]

it sucks how everything has been tainted by patriarchy and as women we cannot do literally anything without it being linked back to patriarchy. like wearing makeup or pink or whatever has been determined feminine by the patriarchal definition feminity, so doing those things means you’re playing into the patriarchy. not doing those things means you’re also playing into patriarchy because it’s a rejection of the idea of femininity, and thus, reaffirms that identifying with feminity in any way is inherently inferior. likeeeee we really cannot win lol… i think a big part of reclamation includes allowing space for people who identify as women to find out what that means to them.

[vermeilin]

as i promised, he's here 😌

[velmashaircut]

Does anyone know why Argenti has a new VA 🤔 ?

[rin-hanarin]

Welp, I guess it's time for me to filter out the Veilguard spoilers. I was chill with them for a while, but I'm catching some wild ones I'd rather learn from the game, there's gonna be nothing left by the time the game actually comes out. If only people weren't tagging literally everything including minor bullshit as spoilers.

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

Do you have any Zhongli/Zhongchi fic recs? I haven’t found any that are nearly as good as yours 😔😔

funnily enough someone already asked this, but it was quite a while ago and tumblr is a mess to search old shit thru so here, this is the post this was asked during the ao3 crisis of- .......last year? i can't remember. either way, the post starts w me saying i don't have all the names and links but dw, after ao3 came back up i edited the post so you should see all authors and links in the recs.

i have to admit that for reasons unrelated to the fandom i haven't been reading many zhongchi fics as of late? so like- bear in mind i don't have an updated mental picture of any of the recs after the post was made. so if one went off the rails or if one of the WIPs finished, i'm not aware;; i also mention in the post that i'd add more recs if i had access to ao3 (which i didn't at the time bc it was down), and while that is true, it's been so long since i read any of them that i wouldn't be able to confidently reccomend them outside of 'i somewhat remember the plot and i remember liking it'. also i don't remember half of their names. so uh- yeah that's the list i think

[motherhenna]

wanted to share an almost full-body pic for the first time in probably almost a decade because for once I'm actually proud of how I'm progressing and think that the changes I'm making will end up being permanent bc I'm genuinely enjoying them. Plus, the few selfies I have shared over the last five years have been very photoshopped and at flattering angles, so I feel like most of y'all don't know what I actually look like. So this is me in my children's theater teacher fit last monday!

I'm 17 lbs down from my highest ever weight, but my trainer thinks I'm probably up at least ten to fifteen lbs in muscle. I'm cooking my own food, eating more reasonable portions, and going to the gym at least five times a week because I want to, not because I feel shame or guilt. And now that I'm working as hard as I am, I'm a lot less triggered by looking at new pictures of myself because I know I'm doing my best. I'm still obese, and probably will be for awhile more, but I'm starting to appreciate what I look like and feel like. And hopefully it'll just get better from here!

[uwooyoungs]

//

[vox-off]

conjuration plus alteration is The caster combo in skyrim, i'm sorry, i don't make the rules. dragonhide + daedra lord + summoned bow, your fave (destruction) could never

[analyzingadventure]

so that picture of gatomons egg falling gave me two thoughts. first: wow her shell is sturdy

and second: what would happen if a digiegg was cracked or smashed. i know some were broken in the corrupted village of beginnings but would they be re-reborn? do you think the eggs could heal from a crack or if it would just not matter

I mean for all we know, the DigiEggs could be literally indestructable (until they hatch), the shell is meant to protect the data of the forming Digimon until it is ready to be born after all, so maybe it could be Sturdy As Hell. The destroyed eggs in the Village could've been just a side-effect of the Village's destruction. Like the rebirth mechanic isn't tied as much to the eggs as it is to the Village itself, it is where Digimon data goes to be reborn. So if you destroy the Village and its ability to spawn DigiEggs, that alone could result in not just the end of egg spawning, but also a spontaneous destruction of the remaining eggs. Or maybe Piemon went stomping on the remaining eggs for funsies, who knows

OR maybe the eggs aren't indestructable, and Tailmon's egg just conveniently landed on something soft that broke the fall, or maybe she was a viable baby and just hatched on impact. I don't think she would've survived otherwise, it would make sense if DigiEggs kinda worked like normal eggs; the baby takes it time until it's ready to be born, if it's completely broken before the baby is viable (/the data is ready to form as a Digimon), the baby dies

That said, the data would probably just restart forming in another egg. Or maybe the egg would just start healing, why bother with making a whole new egg shell when you could just reform the pieces of the egg that still remain (if there are any)