#WAHHHH IM GONNA MISS THEM SO MUCH

[jeanslater]

[infizero]

im genuinely going to be INSUFFERABLE when chapters 3 and 4 come out like you have no idea.

[actualbird]

happy new year kabayan!! 1, 2, 5, 6, 9, 18, 25 for the ao3 wrapped meme!! also you're one of the reasons I got back into TOT and it's a joy seeing your posts and fics around <3💜

wahhhh, hi hi elias!! and happy new year's eve to you too!!! im so honored to be have pspspspspsps'd u back into tot hehehehe, and im so happy to hear you like my works hHUUUUHUUUUU ;^;

u picked a lot of asks, lemme go thru em one by one >:3

1. How many words have you written this year?

A WHOPPING 48K, ACCORDING TO MY AO3 STATS

thats wild, i totally do not feel like i wrote that much. did i black out and post fics while unconscious at some point??? kJBLSKDJF

2. How many works did you publish this year?

10 fics!!! (and one (1) podfic)!!

it's much less than my previous years, but i was SUPPPERRRRR busy with IRL stuff this year so im trying my best not to beat myself up over it ;w;

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

OHHHHH definitely my Main Story 12 missing scene fic with marius and luke, "fail-safe"

personally i didnt feel very satisfied with how i executed the fic, but like, i posted it anyway because i needed the fic Out Of My House. and i wa surprised by the comments i got!!! it made me really happy to see that people liked my take on the missing scene, especially this comment that called it the Best Main Story 12 missing scene fic they read

HUHUUU //SOUNDS OF CRYING

6. Favorite title you used

for the laughs, it's definitely "that time the dragon chose me to be his mate!?!??" for being hilariously cheesy webtoon isekai title vibes HAHAHAHA

9. Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

mariluke

[nobody is shocked]

JBLKSBDFSDFDSF THEY JUST MEAN SO MUCH TO MEEEEEEE. it's definitely an OTP of mine thats gonna go down in my personal history books like. their impact cannot be understated. the more i write them, the more i love them :3

18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

ohhhhhh i primarily wrote mariluke fics this year, so i basically just ping pong'd between writing marius or luke, but marius is definitely more challenging for me to write, between the two of them. especially in the fic i mentioned earlier, "fail-safe"

it was challenging for me to figure out what would be going on in marius' head, in that situation....

25. Did you receive any gifts this year?

not yet!! but because of the @marilukeweek secret santa 2024 event, im due to get a fic gift soon and im SOOOOOO EXCITED FOR ITTTTTTTTTT //HEART EYESSSSS

[mcytscienceside]

YESSS omg so many interesting dynamic

Ramon turning up on Blue with Fit brings us Dapper and Ramon being the frenemies ever (they lovehate each other)

And also Dapper would somehow get into all the higher ups meetings, and him and Tubbo would have the funniest beef ever /affectionate. It’s like every meeting Tubbo plays the game how to find Dapper’s new hidy hole before everything especially important and serious is revealed. He is a good sport about it though if Dapper finds an especially good way to sneak in and hide.

Em, Pepito and Sunny as the youngest are the most protected ones, and often they ended up spending nights together in a cuddle pile under so so many blankets. Tubbo often falls asleep next to them in an armchair which he is reprimanded about by Pac and Tina each time.

Tilin would be so on edge when they get there with Quackity, especially because Bobby, Jaiden and Roier all end up on Red. I think she might be the one to run away.

Pomme, Richas and Dapper would have secret meetings, whenever they can.

Tallulah can’t help but like Tubbo, but she despises Sunny when they first meet. Hard to say why. Meanwhile Chayanne not only adores Tubbo in his own way (despite being very loyal to pa Phil and the kingdom), but also actually finds Sunny cool and funny. He can’t show it outwardly though to not upset Tallulah. But he does sneak his cooking (mainly happiness cookies) to Sunny as gifts when he has a chance.

Bobby and Richas miss each other so much. Maybe Pomme actually takes Bobby as well to her meet ups with Dapper and Richas sometimes.

I don’t know how, but I think there should be something with Roier and Pepito. Maybe Bolas kidnapping Pepito for some reason? And Roier is forced to take care of the kid hostage (they don’t hurt Pepito or give Pepito basic necessities and care because a) Pepito is a child b) Pepito is an important hostage for political reasons).

Rivers would teach the kids sword fighting. Forever and Niki would teach them stuff like geography and literature and languages whenever they can (most of the people will more or less participate in their teaching, but those two the most because they are the best at it).

Bolas do not believe in academics. Forever was green kids’ teacher before as well, but he did have much less time for it because of the more workload.

Pierre works on building robots for all the kids. Just in case.

I think Sunny and Tilin would become unexpected friends while Tilin is still with Blue (in the storyline where he runs away. If Tilin stays, they are still friends).

Empanada and Chayanne have a recipe exchange. This is their only communication – sending each other recipes as letters.

Trump might run away to Blue. I don’t know why, but I think it might happen.

YOUR COOKING!!! YOUR COOKING!! HEHEHE OKAY WAIT GONNA PUT MORE THOUGHTS UNDER READ MORE!!

I will say that Bolas would have academics but it would be MUCH different then what the green kids are used to. What they learned of their solarpunk style tech and magic is instead replaced with lessons on rituals and how to run the bolas technology. They teach the kids how best to use a new magic, one that runs on fire and blood, and some take to it like water while others ademently refuse to learn this stuff.

and the kids sometimes becoming hostages would def be an issue, it's why Bad is so protective of dapper, what better way for them to get to him then through his kid?

So when Pepito is taken by Bolas? I think Bad would have to be held back from literally causing a disaster, he wouldn't focus, he'd be SO angry that it takes multiple people to snap him out of it without causing an earthquake or the volcano to erupt. Also the night crew all meeting up for meetings im soooo :(, they probably wouldn't tell anyone cause much like his dad Dapper is paranoid, he'd definitely not allow anyone like Cheyanne find out or even some of the younger kids who might tattle on them to Tubbo. And Dapper trying to listen in is sooooo wahhhh, Him and Ramon becoming x2 sneaky when they're together and it takes everyone searching the room to find them before any meetings. Tubbo thinks they're very smart but should not be listening in on the serious issues surrounding this intense war. Negotiations can get...heated...to say the least. GOD HEHHE OKAY SO MANY IDEAS TY SO MUCH MY GUY!! These are so so good HEHHE

[pastel-rights]

Rate your friends

oh this anon finally decided to come around [insert tracy happy here]

uhhh it'll be underneath the cut because it's gonna be. long as hell BWAHAHA apologizing ahead of time if I get sappy 😶‍🌫️

sap

sap

sapppp

Rina [ My first real internet friend 🫡]

RINAAA I see you. I see your art. I perceive you.

And, even if we don't talk as much as we used to in the past, you'll always be the first of many great people I've met. And, I really love and appreciate your presence in my life. Dare I say it was life-altering!!

Ocean, Shamia, Arella, and all your other ocs, I'm cradling them in the palms on my hands so so lovingly. I have so many things I need to tell you to be honest !! But goddamnit I have work every night so I'm always busy doing something wahhhh

Anyways.

New Shamia reference when? I need to draw her and her blonde bitchass dog [ jack ] again they're so funny and I miss them 😭

Blue [ My lifelong irl to internet friend ]

From an IRL friend to now an online friend, we just can't get rid of each other. You're so cool...

You don't use tumblr so, I won't talk much further... but I do appreciate you. And all your silly Itto shrine moments.

Tae [ My Beloved Wife 🫶🏼]

She's the Cro to my Lee.

The Shuichi to my Kaede.

The President Barbie to my Stereotypical Barbie.

The Kafka to my Bladie [ unfortunately /lh ]

Theeeee Raiden Ei to my Yae Mikooooo.

My wife is many things to me!! I really really love your art and your writing, and you're always so kind and funny and I just wanna grrrrr I just want to hold all your ocs and all your muses so close I love them all 😭😭😭

although

YOU.

YOU

FUCKING

ASSHOLE /lh

THAT ORPHY EDIT. THOSE KAFKA BLADIE EDITS. THAT PEACE AND FRIENDSHIP TRIO EDIT. TRYING TO GASLIGHT ME INTO THINKING EVERYONE ELSE ISNT REAL. THE MURDER. THE KIDNAPPING. THE DART. THE FUCKING DART. OUGHHHHHHHHH

I HOPE YOU FALL THROUGH THE SKY, JOHN. KER-FUCKING-SPLAT, BITCH. I think you've driven me insane. A little bit.

But.

We're so good we are so good. Don't even WORRY about it.

Sam [ My Infamous Brother-in-Tumblr Law ]

Sam you're so. /pos

I think the Immortalpheus AU has permanently altered my perception on life.

Your writing is. well. it's painful /pos

You're so cryptic and really funny yet you and your sister make me say some weird shit during work. Like the uno cards and the Dazai shenanigans and Immortalpheus moments and whenever you drop some life shattering fics and shit you drop on others.

Crazy.

You're a very nice and fun person, all jokes aside!! You're very cool and very amazing and a delight to game with and just fun to be around??? your AU lore and your bots and everything is just so.

mwah

good friend good friend!!

french /j

Piano Immortalpheus forever immortalized isn’t that funny

Navi [ My detective in arms ]

NAVI.

OUGH.

THOSE VERITY JOURNAL ENTIRIES.

IM SO.

OUGHHHHHHH

Your art and your way of expressing your characters and your son in your writing are just soooo good I rotate them in my head so often.

Whenever I see you posting about your crimes to Tumblr, I simply giggle. Get em, Navi!!

We don't talk very often but like. I'd love to talk more. plot. commit shenanigans. heart hands.

Fifi [ fucking fifi /lh ]

I want to clasp my hands around your neck and rattle you violently /lh /pos

How are we friends /lh

We've been friends so long, it's kind of insane??? I remember first talking to you during Amy's opening event and everything just sort of spiraled from there... and every day with you is. an experience!! /pos

Still waiting for the Tower Bifty interaction fr fr [ they try to murder each other within the first five replies /j ]

Carrie [ my favorite mike enjoyer ]

CARRRIEEEEE

Number One Mike enthusiast the real Mike enjoyer.

Im always so giddy whenever you occasionally message me, even if it's just to check on me or show me how you torment Sam /lh and your writing and way of interpreting differing IDV characters and skins is so good??? I love reading them they make me so giggly.

Overall 10/10 friend would ramble to given the chance

Pins [ my boss /ih ]

MAFIA FISHHHHHHHHHH

stunning

beautiful

talented

pink enthusiast

My actual best friend, dare i say the bestest friend in the world???? every moment I spend with you is a blissful and amazing moment, and you've been through so much with me and the fact you stayed throughout it all????

I'm just... really glad you chose to stick with me this long. I can be a very abrasive and impulsive person, and yet you care for me, even with all my flaws and I think that just... says a lot about you.

You're the Jade to my Chiaki.

The Rook to my Epel.

The Deuce to my Ace!

Also your art just solos everything I glow whenever I see it

Skye [ my twst buddy !! ]

Grabs you

Holds you

Rattles you

Is friend.

Is friend shaped.

Approved /lh

Four [ floyd kinnie moment ]

Stop tormenting me with the take a break floyds you SCARE me

Never will be over the fucking

Ghostbusters Floyd edit

I flex my Beans Floyd in memory of you

You’re not dead I think you’re just somewhere in the distance squeezing someone like your life depends on it

10/10 friend when we ignore the four imposed breaks /j

Beth [ my favorite aesop and naib enjoyer ]

You.

Holds you gently.

The Aesop player

The Panda Naib haver.

The beloved

The silly.

✨ Beth ✨

Your art? Immaculate. I such a adoration for your art, and whenever I’m able to catch your drawing streams??? I’m just in awe!! Your colors and outfit inspirations are just so cute so nice so well done???

You’re so. You’re so cool uwahhh

MarioGuy [ where do you keep coming from I know damn well it isn't the door /lh ]

I feel like you kind of just break into my house sometimes and make yourself known before randomly disappearing through a non existent back door /pos

You’re a delight to be around!! Every match with you is a bit. It’s uhm. Something!! /lh

Please stop breaking into my home

Rice [ i occasionally remember that Mi Bianca thing and cry a little ]

Every time I see you pop up in my notifications I just smile and giggle.

We don’t talk often but you’re just so cool and awesome and your muses are so funky fresh and your art is so good and ????

Yeah.

Klai [ you. ]

You.

Chaos gremlin.

You never learn.

But you’re funny so I guess it’s okay.

Your art is so. It’s like a shiny gem 💎 and I WANT it. Holding it hostage.

My precious friend’s doodles.

Never trusting you to prime a cipher though. No hard feelings /lh

10/10 friend!! 0/10 decoder though /j

Orange [ ORANGEEEE my favorite chaos gremlin ]

ORANGEEEEE 🍊

So funny

So talented

So cool

So so cool

Your art is so good, you’re so funny and talented and a wonder to talk to. Your ideas are so creative so unique and yet so unequivocally you and I just…

I love it!!

Orange stop being so cool /j

Clown [ the greatest step-parent on the scene!! ]

This is utter insanity Clown you can’t be EVERY MUSE’S step parents there has to be a LIMIT!!!

A LINE in the SAND!!!!

Clown PLEASEEE

But also your art.

I’ve talked so much about everyone’s art

Yours reminds me of the feeling of waking up on a snow day and realizing school is canceled.

It’s always such a delight to see!!

And while every time you open your mouth, I get a little more worried about you, you’re so so cool /lh

Lupi [ you. x2 ]

imagine arson? imagine it no more im approaching your house at rapidly increasing speeds with my hello kitty lighter /j

Sleepy [ 🫡 ]

Sleepy!! 🫂 so cool,,, you’re so cool,,, /pos

Emma [ Sorry. Only one monster lover can exist in this server peacefully. GET EM. - emma ]

The caption says it all.

Also Tatya stop accidentally seducing all the muses or nearly getting stabbed or exploded or hypnotized you are worrying the GIRLIES! /lh

Al [ you have the vibes of the drunk wine family member in a /pos way ]

I don’t talk to you often but whenever you come around, it makes me so giggly. You’re very funny and your art slaps!!

Joe [ joe the silliest ]

JOE

Joe

Joe!

Your art? Funky fresh.

The lore? So interesting I love the little snippets I see floating around.

You’re so creative

Your Embrace is so funny they scream sacrificial lamb uncle who’s kind of fun at parties /lh

They’ve also got a really nice and warm personality, chaotic yet chill and relatable.

Kind of reminds me of Sam but without the entities 🫶🏼

Nakki [ you. x3 ]

Grabs you like a squeaky toy

That’s it that’s everything tbh

Kory, Boris, Brian [ and the rest of the McMun's Hut /lh ]

And this goes out to all my friends and acquaintances in the McMun’s hut! What is wrong with all of you /pos/lh (except you Boris, you’re an Angel)

Everyone there is super chill and super nice, and they’re a lot of fun to be around. So many differing personalities yet it’s always a vibe somehow.

[darealsaltysam]

okay yknow what. ignoring what i may think of the show as a whole and my opinions on this season and some writing choices. that was a very good final episode and i did get a little emotional leave me ALONE

like. the way it all comes full circle and parallels things from the first season?? the way everyone got a happy ending???

the opening narration having everyone do it together (really reminded me of that "we are the ones who live" section of the walking dead finale i crode) and also mentioning everyone who died along the way OUGHHH

layton leading rebels from the tail to the engine

melanie finally staying when alex needed her and not leaving in favor of saving the train

ALEX BEING THE ONE TO SAVE THE DAY AS SHE SHOULD BE !!!!!!

the i guess. unintentional id say parallel but having bess and oz disguise themselves as guards and therefore stand against the rebels (and off topic but im so happy we got them as a duo again ive missed their dynamic) but ultimately bess is unmasked first........ like when she was a brakeman..... do u guys see what i see

ruth now standing with the rebels so a complete 180 from what we saw of her in the first episode

josie..... just everything with josie and finally processing her trauma through confronting headwood

melanie making another train announcement......... WITH THE OUTSIDE TEMPERATURE........ FUCKKKK

ALSO AUDREY/BESS HAPPY ENDING I WAS FEARING BURY YOUR GAYS BUT NOT THIS TIME

AND AUDREY SINGING AGAIN SHES GONNA BE FINE SHES GONNA BE FINE GUYS SHES GONNA BE FINE WAHHHH

layton and melanie standing side by side at the end really did me in

and yes the cgi was god awful and it was cheesy as hell but. but.... the shot of the flower growing somewhere on some random mountain far away. yeah baby. thats hope right there. i love hopeful endings

what im saying is. my standards are so low and this was pretty much everything i needed from a finale, thanks <3

[astraystayyh]

OH MY GOD MY FAVORITES??? HOW CAN I CHOOSE THERES SO MANY UR SO CRUEL TO ME </3 (jk)

Ok ok I’ll give u some of my favorites hehe cuz I can’t simply choose just one

Volcano. Automatically Volcano. Might even be my number one?? Literally any time I listen to Volcano now I think of this fic. Like it was just PERFECTION on top of PERFECTION almost made me cry I loved it so much. You packed so many details into it too and I really love coming back to it every once in a while to see what else I catch that I missed before. Also Hannie??? I love my Hannie ok. Volcano was just a masterpiece and I loved her sm truly deserves the best.

Invisible Thread up next! Part one is one of the first fics I read by you I think? Took me a while to come on anon ik ik 🫡 but both parts were just *chef’s kiss* and I loved how they intertwined with each other and complimented each other perfectly. They built off one another and you really saw the character development and growth reading from each part like 🥹 loved her sm. Part two was also a nice comfort for me cuz I wasn’t feeling well when it came out but reading it felt like a warm hug and I really appreciated that comfort at the time.

You’re in the Wind, I’m in the Water is gonna be my third choice hehe. I absolutely love how Hyunjin’s photos birthed this cuz it was so BEAUTIFUL??? And part two absolutely had me hooked. I really loved the sequences and I’m an absolute romance fiend so I was really loving the second part hehe.

Ok I’m not done cuz I can’t forget your drabbles too??? I love them equally hehe. First off the Seungmin drabble where you realize you don’t have to act a certain way around him. Mmm yup that one hit I loved it and wanna give it a lil smoochie. I feel like Seungmin was such a perfect choice for that.

Keeping the Seungmin train going, the other drabble you made where he comforted the reader who tends to bottle up their emotions. Again, hit very hard but was such a great comfort.

Okee last drabble would beeeeee the Chan one of him being proud of you at the end of a hard day. I love comfort fics and you really write them well hehe.

I’ll end this off by also saying I really love all your Hyunjin brain rots too. Like your essay I asked you to write about why you love him? Had me in tears. I just really loved reading it and I feel your understanding of the members REALLY blossoms all of your writings more. Cuz like, you understand them deeper than some may. That’s how I feel at least. I think that really helps to make the fics you write, even just the mini drabbles, feel so much more alive.

I love you, I love your brain, I love your writing, and I’m excited to see what you come up with next year <3

(Also sorry this was long lol)

-💫

YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST TO ME I WANNA REACH THROUGH MY PHONE AND SQUEEZE YOUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you for loving Volcano this much it truly blows my mind that u think of it whenever u listen to volcano because that song is so so so beautiful and for u to associate my work with it..... sobbing in the corner, seriously.

EEEE INVISIBLE THREAD!!! so omg u've been here for a while now THANK YOU FOR STAYING!!!! :'))) and thank you for appreciating the part two as well, it wasn't really action heavy just very healing and human so to know it brought you some comfort? wahhhh warms my heart :(((

HYUNE pool pics will forever go down history like he was insane for that absolutely crazy and i love him so much for it because i think it's my favorite fic too??? it was just from the heart:'))) AND ORANGE!!! hehehhehe im so happy u liked it u are validating the hopeless romantic in me too

THE DRABBLES U REM THEM TOO ☹️☹️☹️☹️ seung is such a comfort figure right writing hurt/comfort for him comes so easily i love him very dearly,, and the chan one ;;;;; his msg that day made me tear up OUR BOYS ARE THE SWEETEST.

thank you for loving my hyune brainrots ;;;;; i love your questions about him the most like you GET ME we get each other thank u for giving me space to talk about him and I LOVE YOU THE MOST, seriously, you always say such sweet and heartwarming things about my writing it makes me so so so so happy. you make this place so much brighter ur emoji fits u so well because u are like a twinkle and light in my life ;;; thank u for existing and for being so kind to me i truly appreciate you more than i could ever express <333

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

HI ARI IM SORR Y FOR SPAMLIKING U BUT HOWVE H BEEN ana do u have any yuki thoughts to share w the class i’m curious :33

NEVER APOLOGIZE RIKO u can spamlike as much as u want <3333 I’VE MISSED U how have u been?? what have u been up to?? :33 tell me tell me 🎤🎤

uni has been eating me alive a tiny bit so i haven’t had much time to catch up on my tbr which depresses me T_T OTHER THAN THAT I’M DOING GOOD THO and wahhhh…. yuki 🥺🥺🥺 my beloved. tysm for asking riko AND WHILE WE’RE ON THE TOPIC that One yuki fanart of yours…. i just about collapsed when i saw it riko u drew her sooo gorgeous …….. women w big beautiful warm brown eyes >>>>>>>>>> Anything Else BUT OK yuki thoughts!!! i don’t think abt her as often as i should but i do have a couple hehe >:33 i love her!!

(jjk manga spoilers under the cut!!)

ok so first of all; i know i’m entirely delusional but idc i STILL think she’s coming back. i believe. i’m akutami’s strongest soldier. i just think it’d be so perfect if she swept in with todo and larue <33 ready to kick some ass <333 i know i probably shouldn’t trust gege too much but i trust him to handle his women decently . like he isn’t nearly as awful as some other shounen authors and i’m tired of people acting like he is …….. the bar is in the lowest layer of hell to be clear but still!! i believe in her return <333

i just think her final line is so so so interesting, and it’s such a specific choice to let it go unfinished…. ”it all boils down to…..” idk i just feel like she’ll come back and say the full line >:33 and it’ll be the coolest line ever also sidenote but i love the panelling here SO much the way her own words are getting DRAGGED into the black hole….. this is my favorite jjk fight overall btw it’s my most beloved ever ever ever none of u will see me again when it gets animated

and!! this is also in connection to this fight but kenny/yuki is one of my absolute favorite dynamics in jjk <333 i think it’s soooo funny how the two characters kenny seems to like most are yuki (beautiful stunning intelligent ruthless special grade woman) and takaba (silly little guy :33) I LOVE THEM SM i need them to live together. i need them to be best friends 4 life. i need to see them all interact so bad it’s never gonna happen but i would literally do ANYTHING riko….,, i adore all three of them <33333 my angels on earth

but honestly i just think yuki and kenny are so interesting….. any time they talk i just feel like they’re two scientists discussing their shared area of interest like there’s so much animosity but also a mutual understanding, it makes me oddly happy for some reason??? and obviously there’s also the fact that yuki is the kind of human being that kenny loves the most; someone who never ever gives up. even as she’s literally been teared into halves, she uses her last strenght to create a fucking black hole despite the risk and i can’t even imagine how much respect kenny must feel for her after that??? yuki & yuji are both the same in that they’ll get up again and again, no matter what, and i think that’s why both of them have a special place in kenny’s heart. yuki/kenny is toxic yuri to me idc i adore them like nothing else. they’re so funny!!!

but kenny aside, i really do think yuki is such a wonderful character. she’s just Everything. she’s so intelligent, so powerful, so all-consuming. such a perfect example of what a special grade is like. i really love the fact that she isn’t necessarily always on the Good side, she has her own ideals and goals and sometimes they conflict with what the good guys want. but yuki still desires a world without curses, at her very core, and i think that tells us so much about what kind of person she is!!

AND AND AND AND ANDDDDD arguably my favorite thing about her is how beastcoded she is. LIKE. she is a Beast and she’s gritty and she’s ruthless and she bites and bites & this is exactly how i think powerful shounen women should be depicted. akutami underutilizes his women for SURE but he still treats them with respect in the sense that their strenght doesn’t have to be justified, their bouts of insanity and pure instinct don’t need to be justified, all sorcerers are a little sick in the head and that statement goes beyond gender. yuki is a tiny bit insane and we love her for it <33 JUST LOOK AT THESE PANELS WAHHH she’s the coolest ever

”heal yourself!” ”hell no!” is one of my fav pieces of dialogue in the whole manga <33 god i love yuki vs kenny vs choso SO much… three bad bitches duking it out <33333

[blackrupee]

Wow your life sounds complicated right now I'm sorry for that. So you aren't gonna have any managers what the fuck? And OH MY GOD I hate when people come in to eat so close to close!!!! ( I work @ zaxbys) if someone is acting passive aggressive I would act even more passive aggressive- make that bitch regret it- regarding the 2 guys: 2 guys is better than no guys:))) wish the first one didn't pressure you though. How did the 2nd one hurt you? - and I care so don't worry about boring me

hi hello would you like to read a novel on my life thanks i talk too much (tldrs at end)

nah like.. we had been managing with a general manager and 3 assistant managers even though we really need 4 so as not to overwork anyone. we recently hired a new one from a corporate arbys (we’re franchised) and two just quit. like i mentioned, theyre not coming back even though the original plan was that their new jobs would be only temporary (6 weeks). sooooo now we have a general manager who only works weekday day shifts, one assistant manager who is relatively new (she had been working at this place for a while but was promoted to manager 6ish months ago) and another who is brand new but still has some experience. they said theyre looking to promote from within initially, but they might have to hire outside people if no suitable potential manager is picked. id love to get manager pay and its not like managers do anything hard so id be WILLING to be a manager..like the whole reason why i got trained on backline was because we have such a big turnover rate with backline people since it fucking SUCKS and i was wanting to be helpful and flexible. so like. thats what i offerred. but one assistant manager was like “lmao all youd do is swear at the customers” and im like bitch when have i ever?? i talk shit about them all the time but ive only sworn IN FRONT OF a customer twice and neither time was it directed at them. but i mean im sitting on a small handful of customer complaints so its not like the gm would even consider me probably. idk dude. i can be nice if you pay me to be nice. but i get paid to do food and do it fast……….so

but yeah literallyyyyyyyyy i have no idea how people can be so??? inconsiderate???? and they dont??? care??? im learning that my contant frustration with people in my personal interactions is due to a disconnect between what i value in  expectations and what actually happens. like. when i go somewhere i already KNOW what i want, so i say it quickly and competently. i preface a lot of my interactions with people im requesting food or services from with “i’m sorry but…”. i phrase things as “could i get” as opposed to “get me” or “i want” which sound HELLA rude tbh. id always have my money ready at the window or the register, im always trying to pay attention and not miss anything or just….be rude in any way bc i know fast food fucking sucks. i know some of the people i interact with probably hate their job as much as i do and i want to be the smallest burden i can be. and it seems like nearly no one else has these same values???? and i dont understand how people can just??? be? so? inconsiderate?

also yes bitch im the queen of passive aggression. literally the night before i was working a short shift and my friend was closing frontline and this bitch was closing drivethrough. i just got the okay to clock out and i was like “bye! have a beautiful night! just know that i love you so much and ive everything ive ever said has always been fake until this point! never meant anything ive ever said until now especially if your name starts with k or ends with ristin (drivethrough girl/the one whos being so difficult is named kristin) but just know that i love you!” and basically being really dramatic and extra as satire.

i guess for context the whole reason she decided to be mad at me was the other night when she was drunk and was like “do you even likeeeeeee meeee i feel like you hateeeee meeee wahh wahh wahhhh” even though im like…..yes bitch i enjoy your company? i joke/use hyperbole/satire/irony/whatever a lot but like occasionally id be like “ey yo you know its all jokes right u know i love u right” just to ensure that she knows but she fucking. ignores it all. i feel like she so desperately WANTS me to hate her and tbh i got fucking sick and tired of hearing her complain all the time about this shit! i fucking hate repeating myself! so sure. if you want me to hate you so fucking much there. i hate you. i fucking hate you so fucking much. like is that what you want to hear? is that validating? are you fucking happy?

its so fucking frustrating

but i will not be held accountable for her decision to be upset. because thats what it is. she wants to be upset, and she wants me to be responsible for it when its literally not my responsibility. i am absolutely not going to stand for this shit like i kind of want to say its emotional abuse lmaooo but im just so fucking sick of it. 

everyone knows that i take chicken tenders and turnovers that would be thrown out at the end of the night and she was closing frontline yesterday and made a point to throw out the turnovers right next to me without asking if i wanted any/leaving any for me. i mean i completely expected her to be that petty of a bitch so it was kind of funny tbhonestly. also im p sure she unfollowed me here lmaoo

with regards to the guys and this paragraph could get a bit tmi/nsfw: yeah the first one kind of sucked but i feel like a little bit of the New Person Nerves have worn down so id do better if we were to hookup again. because like i totally would love to have fucked him but…..anxiety. he was hot tho. like 10/10 body and ass holy shit. plus he complimented me on my ass eating so (assuming that was genuine and not a vapid ego boost haha paranoia am i right) hopefully he comes back for seconds. 

second guy ive had a longish history with. started talking to him at the beginning of last fall semester and we hooked up kinda regularly for about a month. things fell apart, we both understood that we wouldn’t be good dating wise but still enjoyed meaningless cuddles. whatever. it got to a point where he would only hit me up like once every month and a half or so and towards like january-ish he hits me up again. so im like nice cool lets chill. im getting ready for this but my phone is in the other room. while im doing this he drove by my place to pick me up (since he was on his way back from nashville), didnt get a response to an “im here” text (bc i was busy and tbh not expecting him to do that), and left. he lives within like walking distance tho so im like “?? sorry i was busy are you still out or should i walk over?“ and he texts me like “sorry hold up a thing just happened” and im like…….okay. so im just.. waiting around for him. periodically texting like “hey are we good for tonight and whats going on?” because like there was some drama with his friend? hes like.. apologizing and shit but this goes on for an hour. BUT. the ENTIRE time he’s dealing with this friend problem or whatever he’s literally on grindr. and at the end of this hour im like in full blown paranoia panic mode and i literally text him something mentioning this and he BLOCKS ME ON GRINDR so im like ??????!!!!??? and i text him (all while saying “not to be crazy or paranoid bc im probably coming off that way but like could i get an answer or something??”) AND HE LITERALLY SAYS HE DELETED HIS GRINDR. but thats a LIE because i have a secondary account to see like……if guys are still on grindr/if a thing with a guy might turn into something more like if i see he’s not on grindr as much?? thats prob incredibly stalkerish and probably really creepy but hey. thats me. so i KNOW he lied to me but i cant really say “hey ur a liar” without disclosing this weird creepy stalker part of me (funnily enough this isnt the first time a guy has lied to me and i caught it with my secondary account! so it proves to have some function use in the end. not totally crazy). so. yeah. that was the incident. after this i dont trust him at all, and i still dont, but i had it in my mind to like somehow get him to fall in love with me just so i could break his heart for doing this? never really worked out. so now im at the point where im like….eh he’s a piece of shit and i hate him but ill cuddle with him bc it feels good

back to nsfw/tmi: the sex was okay. he’s weird about people being near his like….dick and stuff because he was raped and i totally get it bc i was too but he was comfortable enough for me to finger him and my finger still hurts from where he clenched when he came lmaoooooo. was totally hot tho. and i got to east his ass so im like eyyyyyyyy. its been so long since ive eaten ass so having it two consecutive nights in a row has been cathartic.

tldr; we have 2 assisant managers and a gm rn. looking for more

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; he’s a liar