#Van eck can go die in a hole actually
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I will die on the hill that this deserves a place amongst rankings of the saddest quotes in Crooked Kingdom:
“You don’t understand. It was me, I caused this”
- Wylan, chapter 14, when Jesper says he wants to feed Van Eck to the vultures for what he did to Marya.
#I know I never shut up about it but the manipulation he put Wylan through is so horrifying#Wylan spent the vast majority of both books fully convinced that everything his father had done to him#had happened because he deserved it#the man tried to kill him twice before Crooked Kingdom even began#(once when he sent him away and once when he destroyed the ferolind)#and he was genuinely convinced it was his fault#“I treat you more harshly than the world will"#Van eck can go die in a hole actually#six of crows#crooked kingdom#grishaverse#leigh bardugo#wylan van eck#wylan hendriks#marya hendriks#marya van eck#jan van eck#soc meta#assorted analysis - grishaverse#six of crows fandom#grishaverse fandom
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128 THINGS I LOVED ABOUT CROOKED KINGDOM (WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!!!) Part 1
1. It has WYLAN’S POV
2. Jesper is one of his biggest reasons for committing to being a member of the Dregs and he knows it
3. Kaz breaks into the house of a wealthy and probably dangerous lawyer in the middle of the night but first things first, he’s gotta give the guard dogs belly rubs before robbing their owner.
4. Nina is still facing the consequences of ingesting parem and yet here she is undercover, charming this lawyer out of his whistle.
5. Wylan’s dark side just gets darker
6. Kaz having a rare soft moment and telling Wylan where his mother is buried cause he knows what it’s like to lose someone suddenly and not get to say goodbye
7. Matthias trying to understand Kaz’s sleight of hand and still failing to see how he does it
8. Matthias wishing Wylan or Kuwei would wear a hat so he could tell them apart
9. Wylan blushing at Jesper’s touch
10. Wylan Van Sunshine
11. Leave my grandmother out of this
12. Jesper’s dad is so innocent and precious and must be protected at all costs
13. Are you all students? Of a sort
14. Matthias has a little sister
15. Matthias comforting Alys cause she reminds him of his mother when she was pregnant
16. Nina whining over Matthias sacrificing her biscuits to keep Alys quiet
17. Matthias jealous of Jesper making Nina smile
18. Inej laughing in Van Eck’s face for thinking he outwitted Kaz
19. Nina expecting Matthias to rub her feet from now on whenever she wants him to
20. Matthias longing for a domestic life with Nina
21. Nina longing for the comfort of family relationships like the one Jesper has with his father
22. Jesper as a kid
23. Jesper’s mom was the sweetest most badass person ever and taught him everything he knows at such a young age
24. The WYLAN’S MOM CURVEBALL WHO THE HECK DOES THAT TO A PERSON MY POOR BABY HOW DARE JAN DO THAT TO HIM AND HER?!
25. Wylan’s motivation to get revenge
26. Kaz giving Wylan a pep talk about strength when facing a weakness
27. Matthias’s relationship with his wolf
28. Matthias pretending to be a happy go lucky Fjerdan
29. Nina having to explain every single dirty joke to him and convince him they’re not insults
30. Nina and Matthias’s first kiss being straight out of a Disney movie 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
31. Everyone points guns at each other in Ketterdam it’s basically a handshake
32. Matthias going into full military general mode and leads a two-man Grisha army in a victorious mini war against the Dime Lions
33. Kaz literally CRASHING Van Eck’s dinner party
34. Dunyasha: “I am Dunyasha, a white human blade, a ruthless assassin princess, and my sole purpose is destroying you. Prepare to feel my ninja stars.”
Inej: “New phone who dis?”
35. Colm Fahey adopting his teen gang member son’s five gang member friends
36. Nina finally getting her waffles
37. Only to realize Matthias Helvar is possible better than waffles (just barely, but still)
38. Matthias believing waffles is Nina’s one true love instead of him
39. What’s new? Nm, Nina can raise the dead to do her bidding, Inej plummeted 20 stories and nearly died at the ninja stars of some assassin chick with a huge ego, and there’s a huge gaping hole in Jan Van Eck’s dining room ceiling. Hbu? Who wants waffles?
40. They’re all crazy but Wylan realizes there’s nobody he’d rather have by his side cause the Dregs are HIS CREW
41. Kaz Ankle Breaker Brekker sliding past a pair of Van Eck’s guards and knocking them off their feet at once with his cane
42. The Crows trying to outdo each other with the highest rewards offered for their execution or capture.
43. Kaz winning that contest in a landslide
44. Nina flipping off their Wanted posters
45. Nina changing out of her Fjerdan costume with Matthias’s “help.”
46. Jesper and Kuwei’s haunting the Dime Lions
47. Little Inej stopping hearts and scaring her family to death on the high wire but wanting to keep going back on no matter what
48. Inej only falling when a net is underneath her
49. Wylan’s first impression of Jesper
50. Jesper’s flair for neon fashion
51. “Mother, father pay the rent! I can’t my dear the money’s spent!”
52. “On a dare I ate a literal trough full of waffles doused in apple syrup and almost went back for seconds.”
53. Kaz treating Jesper like a brother, even yelling at him and calling him Jordie because he’s so protective of Jesper and wants to keep him from making a mistake too big because of his gambling addiction. Seeing Jesper get carried away with his best worries him and he just wants him to be smart and not make the same costly mistakes Jordie did.
54. Kaz and Jesper arguing like brothers and then proceeding to fight like brothers while Inej, Nina, and Matthias sit around bored, waiting for them to snap out of it cause they’re definitely not going to kill each other with their bare hands, and there are bigger things to worry about.
55. Jesper’s dad breaking up the fight with a single threat
56. Jesper Llewelyn Fahey
57. I KISSED THE WRONG BOY
58. Inej and Jesper’s friendship
59. Matthias being very okay with PDA with Nina
60. Colm’s presence making the Dregs feel like kids worn out from a rowdy birthday party
61. Kuwei being a straight up savage and lying about his language barrier
62. KANEJ WOUND BANDAGING SCENE DESTROYED ME EVERYTHING ABOUT IT I HAVE NO COMPLAINTS NOR DID I EXPECT HIM TO EVEN GET HALF AS CLOSE TO HER AS HE DID
63. Kaz trying so so hard to push away all memories of his trauma to be in the moment and touch Inej and just show her how much she means to him
64. She followed him anyway
65. Kaz reclaiming his rightfully EARNED Dregs throne
66. Inej watching him kick out Haskell and kick traitor Dregs ass with pride
67. “I suggest a cane”
68. “What’s wrong with him?”
“Same thing that’s always wrong with him, he’s Kaz Brekker.”
66. Nina constantly trying to get Kaz to warm up a little, whether by joining a group hug or letting someone help bandage him up post-fight for his life
67. Colm willing to do anything to help the gang without question
68. Wylan’s cute anger at Jesper for mistaking Kuwei for him (let’s be real tho he was pretty mad at himself too for not being more upfront with his feelings since he had no Tailor to fix him)
69. Wylan getting mad at Nina for failing to mention she found a refugee Tailor that could change him back
70. Colm feeding into Nina’s waffle/food in general addiction
71. The politics in the story are so intricate and it just continues to be built upon in Crooked Kingdom. It’s detailed enough that honestly, Leigh could probably write a whole Grishaverse history textbook. It’s pretty interesting to read from everything we get from the Dregs discussing their home nations, their histories, traditions, and relations with other countries. Leigh put in so much effort to build not just an authentic country in Kerch, but an entire alternate world. Really fun to read about.
72. Wylan’s offense for Jesper not being able to tell him and Kuwei apart in that moment
73. Jesper stealing a portrait Wylan’s mother painted of him to help them reconnect once Wylan’s features are returned
74. “I told you, I like your stupid face.”
75. Jesper helping Genya tailor Wylan’s “stupid” face because he remembers it quite well
76. Jesper nearly losing it when he returns to find the boy he had fallen for at first sight has returned to his original appearance
77. JESPER KISSING THE RIGHT BOY
78. “I really hope we don’t die”
79. Colm giving an award worthy performance in front of Van Eck to rope him and the Council into falling for Kuwei’s fake indenture auction
80. Nina’s underlining threat to Van Eck for messing with Kaz, only a fool would try to scheme against Brekker
81. Colm telling Wylan that he’d be good for Jesper ☺️
82. Wylan taking an actual beating from other Dregs to make Jan Van Eck believe the Dime Lions were going to kill his son for him
83. Wylan’s on point acting making everybody in the chapel believe his father was a conniving scumbag all along
84. THE FACT THAT JESPER CAN ACTUALLY USE HIS POWERS TO AIM HIS BULLETS
85. Kaz lying like nobody’s business to the Merchant Council and everyone bidding on Kuwei to throw Van Eck under the bus
86. Kaz freaking BLOWING UP THE MENAGERIE IF THAT’S NOT A DECLARATION OF HIS LOVE TO INEJ IDK WHAT IS
87. Kaz and Inej hand holding
88. Nina pretending to be pregnant
89. Matthias believing Kaz could fake a birth
90. Genya teaming up with Kaz and Nina to fake Kuwei’s death
91. I haven’t even read the Shadow and Bone trilogy yet but I love King Nikolai and his alter ego and I can’t wait to read more of him in the series and in King of Scars!!!!!
#kaz brekker#six of crows#crooked kingdom#inej ghafa#kaz x inej#nina x inej#grishaverse#ketterdam#leigh bardugo#dregs#also matthias is still alive and no one can convince me otherwise#matthias helvar#nina zenik#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#jesper and wylan#wylan van sunshine#kuwei yul bo#kuwei
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your least favorite character for the thing
send me a character and i’ll answer the following!
JAN VAN ECK JANE VAN EVIL*** HERE WE GO
general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would banghogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuffbest quality: keeps creating elaborate plans that fail horribly and ultimately lead to his public humiliation and arrest in front of everyone he knows :)worst quality: emotional abuser, tried to kill his own son, had his wife committed, manipulated and tried to kill a bunch of teenagers, planned to use one of them for his own political and economic gain, kidnapped another and kept her old locked up and threatened to break her legs just to use her as leverage, had his son horribly beaten, made wylan feel like a failure for years because of one thing he couldn’t do, i fucking hate jan van eck,ship them with: a slow and painful deathbrotp them with: the worst cell in hellgateneeds to stay away from: WYLAN, INEJ, kaz, matthias, nina, jesper, kuwei, MARYA, alys, every decent person he’s ever come into contact with,misc. thoughts: i hate jan van eck SO MUCH there will never be a better scene than when he gets systematically exposed as the slimy lying manipulative cruel human turd that he is and i hope he rots in prison for the rest of his miserable pathetic life, he is the actual Worst person and every time i think about how wylan had to live with him for years and hear about how he was a failure, how he’d never be good enough, how he was stupid and should be sent away where everyone can forget van eck had a son in the first place i want to PUNCH SOMETHING he had such a gift of a son and put him through that for years, he had his wife COMMITTED just so he could divorce her and remarry, not only that but so he could remarry a girl not much older than his son who’s clearly never had to think for herself in her whole life and would go along with anything he wanted, he sent a bunch of TEENAGERS into the world’s deadliest prison to retrieve yul-bayur despite knowing they would most likely ALL DIE and when they came back and said “yeah we don’t have yul-bayur but here’s his 15 yr old son” van eck was just like “oh great another scared young person i can use for my own gain hand him over” AND THEN ALL THAT SHIT HE SAID ABOUT WYLAN AND AS IF THAT’S NOT ENOUGH HE THEN HAD INEJ KIDNAPPED AND KEPT HER HIDDEN AND THREATENED HER AND MADE HER THINK NOBODY WAS COMING AND SHE WAS COMPLETELY ALONE fucking hell do i hate jan van eck. so much. so goddamn much
#bless you for giving me this opportunity#lhrrywins#audreil#libby's letters#abuse //#emotional abuse //
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KUWEI YUL-BO
send me a character and i’ll answer the following!
general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff i don’t know??? i could make arguments for any and all of these tbh he’s fuckin hard to classifybest quality: listen talking about kuwei is Hard because he deliberately presents this version of himself that isn’t quite him but uh. anyone remember that time he said “give me to van eck” so the rest of them could go free even though he had no real reason to be loyal to any of them if they couldn’t protect him but he was willing to hand himself over anyway? that.worst quality: again, talking about actual qualities is hard, see above, but when he let jesper think he was wylan and kissed him? why the fuck would you do that. don’t do that. i mean i’ve said before he was almost definitely in a “i’m gonna die very soon what the hell” mindset and he’s 15 so like, it doesn’t define him as a Bad Person for the rest of his life but still.ship them with: HAPPINESS PEACE AND FREEDOM, wylan, gonna throw jesper/wylan/kuwei out here againbrotp them with: nina, but also wylan if not the aboveneeds to stay away from: the shu government, fjerda, actually every nation that wanted to use a 15 yr old boy for their own political gain, jan van eck, misc. thoughts: listen i love kuwei so much. he lived in shu han for years and says “we live a frightened life ... it was never home” which tells you all you need to know about that, he saw his father DIE, was imprisoned in the place where they literally torture and kill grisha while being forced to recreate parem while ALSO BEING AN INFERNI can you imagine how fucking terrified he must have been that whole time, like HE EXPECTED TO DIE ANY DAY HE WASN’T EVEN GONNA STOP NINA FROM DOING IT HE WOULD HAVE LET HER KILL HIM. even after ck he’s left trying to fix this problem he didn’t cause and didn’t ask for but probably still feels massively responsible for because his father created parem to help him and he’s the only living person with firsthand knowledge of parem and the freedom to use that to help make an antidote (presumably some lab assistant in shu han knows but can’t do anything about it) even though science isn’t even smth he’s good at (which kuwei acknowledges so i don’t think it was just wylan saying that), the parallels with wylan like god i’ve made a whole post about this and i still keep thinking of more and forgetting to add them, this is now a stream of consciousness but did he even get to mourn his father properly? did he have friends in shu han? i feel like the answer is definitely no tbh. is he safe? eating well? with people who care about him? this is so incoherent lmao but i would fight someone for kuwei, i love him, he deserved so much better than everything that happened to him and i hope he’s safe and happy in ravka
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