#Upping the saturation was so good I love the colors
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panel that hurt me so much I redrew it âš
#Nevermore#Nevermore Webtoon#Webtoon#6#Some things look meh but I just had to get this out of my system#It was so sad!!!!!!#like the way I recorded it just makes me die inside#Anyway#the tears were actually kinda hard for some reason#I wish I couldâve done the one down her check but it just like didnât work#Upping the saturation was so good I love the colors#And the eyes Iâm always a sucker for the eyes and this time they look so good#Lenore honey itâs gonna be okayyyyyy
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lovely palettes. always. even just by scribbling random color spots on him outside of his normal head markings to test it out
it also works fine with his current markings
i also recolored that last one with his current blue palette (altered midtones though) and instantly my brain goes OOH saturated blue colors better. you love blue. blue so good, remember? BLUEE!!!
aeugh. if i up the saturation of the monochrome it looks a lot like the style of a past layout there. which works as well!.. but when i compare daron's blue palette and this monochrome one its like the mono loses all its charm even though i know i love that palette too.. its like the more saturated palette is eye candy and i cant get enough of it to the point everything else looks worse by comparison if theyre not vibrant. cmon man. let me enjoy different things
#i love this mono palette sooo much you have no idea. thats the one im pondering making the new site layout with.. if that happens..#whats with me and drooling over saturated colors. genuinely. or maybe better rephrased would be why i find unsat colors less appealing?#theres a post of this saturation conundrum on my wips tag as well where trying to add grey to darons palette looks like garbage to me#bc my brain just cant get enough of saturated colors. its addicted to them. genuinely like candy..#i do still want an alt with these colors badly even if i dont end up making a layout with them as the palette#but its so annoying how the moment i bring a more saturated palette next to an unsat one its like BOOM. not good anymore! fuck you!#also this pose ended up really decent. didnt sketch first or anything. quite a surprise#gimme a break..#dextxt#wips
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#we finally painted the exterior of our house. bought it over three years ago and it needed so much work#but we finally got enough done that it made sense to paint.#since it all took so long we had pleeeeeenty of time to pick a color#i painted huge swatches on the back of the house and we stared at them for over a year#i was terrified of picking something ugly lol im not a designer and my wife DEFINITELY isnt#but anyway ever since we had it painted a few weeks ago I've been OBSESSED WITH IT#it literally looks so fucking good like SOOOO GOOD#we picked the PERFECT COLOR. its blue but its not too dark and not too light#not too saturated and not too gray. a tiny hint of green but not a lot#it looks amazing with the red brick of the chimney and the reddish stain on our front door#it looks amazing with the green of all my wife's plants in the garden#it looks amazing in every lighting at every hour of the day#well someone just showed up at my door like 'hi i live in the neighborhood and we're gonna paint our house'#and 'my wife and i love this color and i was wondering if you remember the name of it'#YES. YES I DO REMEMBER THE NAME OF IT. đ#i mean every neighbor we talk to is like 'omg it's so good!' but this is a guy who I've never seen#he must be on a different street so they just see it when they drive by since we're on the corner#sorry i just feel so satisfied right now lmao
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#i think i finally achieved the monica bellucci make up look in la riffa#slight brown taupe eye shadow and pencil + a nude kinda darker beige almost brown lips#+ eyebrows brushed slightly vertically to make them appear fuller#nothing groundbreaking it's your typical 90's look but i think i made it work for myself#there's probably a shit tone of tiktoks specifically about it already but i just love being behind the curve đ€#i'm technically still on the hunt for a good 90's beige/brown lipstick that'd be slightly darker than what i already have but it's so#difficult to find a nice muted lipstick shade in this saturated colors barbie renaissance age#the 2020's are such a dark times for earth tones lovers
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[ID: A digital drawing of Serana from Skyrim, lying on her side. Her arms cross over each other at the wrist, her hands in front of her mouth. Her eyes are open, slightly, and downcast. One strand of hair falls over her face and hand both. End ID]
sorrow
#image described#this does have a very melancholy feel to it#the pose and the face here are giving me like. going about your day and then it just Hits all at once without any real specific provocation#so you just saturate in it. and then you get up and keep going. but now slightly more consciously aware of The Horrors#like yeah. sorrow#also i like the hair here a lot both in terms of coloring and the way it's shaped? with her laying on it#i don't know how to articulate it. The hair physics#also the nose shading which feels like a very specific thing to point out but it looks good. so.#the way her lip is slightly visible i also really like. i feel like if the mouth were fully covered even if everything else were the same#it wouldn't have quite the same mood. i think it was a good choice#also like the way the eyes are colored here#i think the word i'd describe this with is subdued#a very subdued sorrow. the kind of misery that's just There#and i love a good subdued sadness in art#art#serana#skyrim
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Grinding whole spices is WORTH the cost and effort
Just wanted to remind folks that if flavor was color, pre-ground spices are pastels, and freshly-ground spices are vibrant fully-saturated jewel tones with an iridescent rainbow sheen.
I am not shilling, I will not link you to a brand or product.
But please, please put it on your future to-do list to acquire a ultra gritty (not smooth ceramic or glazed) spice grinder. Lava rock if you can. The mexican Molcajete works wonderfully. An electric grinder if you must.
Search for a local asian or latin supermarket for cheap whole spices in bulk. Per-Pound, whole spices in a baggie are almost always cheaper than pre-ground bottles.
I am begging you, knees on the ground and tears in my eyes, to please, just once, go buy a tiny amount of good-quality cinnamon bark.
It should be a lovely medium-brown color with a soft orange tint, not nearly black with age. It should look a little soft and crumbly around the cut edges. Look for the flat pieces, which haven't curled into rolls from dryness.
Break a little piece off. Less than the size of your thumbnail. Crush or grind it however you can. Smash it with a hammer, make dust with sandpaper, however you want.
And stick it in your mouth.
A tiny amount of freshly ground cinnamon bark is heady, fruity, sweet, floral, and has a warm spice that breathes down your throat. You can chew on bits of the bark like candy, it's so sweet and good.
Pre-ground cinnamon tastes like bitter dust and betrayal by comparison.
The really old, dry as dust cinnamon sticks that look so dark brown they're nearly black... you can grind those up too, it'll improve the flavor, but it's about three steps behind the fresh stuff. Kingdoms fought wars over fresh cinnamon. Kings traded war prisoners for pounds of cinnamon, and I get it. I understand.
If you can afford it, if you want an earth-shaking treat, please consider: Whole Nutmegs, Good Cinnamon, Whole Cloves, and Whole Peppercorns.
And some method of grinding them.
#spices#fresh spices#spice grinding#Seriously#If I could reach through the screen and hand every single one of you a piece of GOOD cinnamon bark#I'd do it in a heartbeat#Also; freshly ground nutmeg is life-changing
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Is it so hard to ask that sabo follow his dream he had when he was a kid? IS IT??????
Also, his boat was commissioned from Franky! And he did a great job :)
Design talk:
Im gonna start with just sharing his canon designs
Colors:
Something i want to call attention to is the blue and black in his design.
When he was young, Sabo wore his heart on his sleeve. He had a dream for himself and was taking steps to complete it. Likewise, that blue on his coat is on full display its bright and vibrant and saturated. But also theres that dark blue, almost black, thats underneath it thats being hidden by that coat, the pants, and his tattered cravat. Likewise again, Sabo is hiding his darker side. He has secrets he doesnât want his brothers to know of and he lets his aspirations and relationships he has with them outshine his past.
In his present design, that blue that was representative of his dreams, is now the one being hidden. Its covered by a complete black coat, a representative of the darkness in his life that now is drives him. This color switch up is symbolic for how heâs put off his dreams and kept it locked up (belt), while choosing instead to pursue a life of darkness for the greater good.
Also, these pictures of young sabo and young adult sabo, you can visually see how less saturated it is. The blue is duller of the coat/undershirt and even more-so with the pants. You can see how heâs much less vibrant than how he was.
In my Post-Story idea, what happens leading up to it is that Sabo succeeds in taking down the world government and after heâs sure the world can move on without him, he goes sailing alone as a pirate to write a book about the world, like heâs always wanted to do. Also, Luffy returns his straw hat to shanks.
So in my design, sabo wears a vibrant blue coat again. Heâs living his dream and has nothing holding him back from doing it. The black is still used, and its not being covered, but its on his pants and his gloves. He still has that darkness, but he doesnât use it as protection or as something to hide, rather as something he moves forwards and progresses with. He will never forget what pain and hardship he went through and heâs not trying to. However, whats underneath all the layers is not darkness or dreams, and its not necessarily being hidden either, its light. Not BRIGHT, but light. Mellow and calm. The settled true nature of a healed man.
I took more colors from his child design than i did with his young adult (YA) one, too. I wanted to show how heâs reconnecting with his younger self by bringing them through to his Post-Story look!
Also, since his journal is his dream, it is blue, as well.
âââ
Items of Clothing:
In both of his canon designs, there is a sense of properness. A top hat, cravat, tailcoat, etc etc.. Its all properness. But more than that, its the idea of responsibility.
Whether he acts responsible or not isnât what matters in his case, instead its that he wants to look responsible. He wants this because a) he was a little kid who wanted to grow up too fast and be taken seriously, and b) because he has an incredible amount of responsibility being the second in command of the revolutionary army.
To further prove that, I would like to point out his silly little cravat. I love his cravat. But how the hell is that practical for his line of work? Sabo is concerned with being practical, hence his baggy/movable pants and leather gloves. Additionally, just the waist/trench coat, belt, top hat combo would suffice for a proper looking person, but itâs taken excessively with the cravat. The cravat is purely for appearances.
Further symbolism with his cravat, i think, is that this appearance is visually choking him. Its wrapped tightly around his neck when he was a child and when he was most under control of a much higher power. However, when heâs a YA, itâs a lot looser. Heâs got some agency, but heâs still being suffocated by responsibilities.
On with my design.
I took away his cravat. Im sorry but it is SYMBOLIC!!!!!!! He is not worried anymore with appearances, he is Free.
I took away his top hat but not his goggles, too. I think that after Luffy gives back the straw hat, Sabo forgoes his hat as well. In solidarity, maybe. If you think about it, the top hat isnt what makes his hat so special, its the goggles. So i got rid of the hat and kept The Goggs. Although it is sad that they are no longer Hatted, as that is one of the beautiful appeals of ASL, they are no longer ASL.
I wanted to keep aspects of his YA design, since even though it is very perforative, its still a style that heâs stuck with since childhood, so heâs gotta like it in some capacity. I just tried to make everything look a lot looser/open on him.
Lastly, i gave him a bit of a beard cuz i think he deserves it.
âââ
Alright! If you got this far, thanks so much for reading my insane ramblings!!!! I fr feel like this rn đ
Visually, saboâs design is not too complex, at least not when you look at him next to Ace, but theres a lot of depth to it. I didnt even think of half of these notes before i started typing this up, its just the more time i look at it, the more i noticed!
#my art#one piece#monkey d. luffy#sabo#asl brothers#one piece fan art#sabo the revolutionary#post story au
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TANGERINE | myg (m)
pairing: boyfriend!yoongi x fem!reader
genre: smut, fluff â comfort
rating: 18+
summary: yoongi has figured out a way how to make your life easier.
word count: 3.5k
warnings: brief sexual intercourse â controlled riding, anxiety, crying, feelings of fear, provider!yoongi, hoseoksluna's inner child trope, smoking habits as a form of coping.
luna's note: i wasn't planning to post anything as i was just trying to stay alive this week. i tried to write something, but the words felt weird, so i thought i was to abandon writing for the week. that is, until i saw a reel of a guy, a girl and a tangerine (not spoiling it for you). so i ran to my yoongi and allowed him to make me feel better. this took two days to write, and i hope you enjoy. i love you all with all my heart. thank you for all your comforting messages. i read them everyday. mwah. luna loves you so much.
đ ౚà§
taglist | join here: @jjk7k, @tkslovechild, @euphoricmyth, @cinmmongirl, @ririkookiemonster,Â
@perfectiondazesworld, @https-mei, @bangtansonyeondanue, @jungkoock, @cinmmongirl,Â
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It was the color of the ripest, the sweetest tangerine that unfolded across the pendulous clouds, undulating around their soft, puffy bodies before it entered them, saturating them with its potent tint. You had just finished your cigarette on the darkened street outside of your home with your boyfriend by your side, who had dropped the last hour of his office work and came straight to youâsimply because he sensed that you needed him.Â
Yoongi knew by your curt, short sentences, which lacked your usual zest and life, that something was wrong. He didnât suffocate you with useless questions about the evidence of your sadness like anyone in his place would, but instead got inside his car and sped down the road, still wearing his midnight blue military shirt and dress pants that never fit him right. You always thought that detail perfectly illustrated how he doesnât belong there, how he shouldnât, in fact, be there at all.Â
But the office work does him good, thankfully. He gets the job done and gets to come home right after the fifth hour of the dayâinto the warmth between his music-strung walls. Sometimes, you wait for him there with dinner ready on the stove. Sometimes, he asks where you would rather spend your night, attuned to your moods and wishes like no one in your life is. Theyâre as important to him as the fact whether youâve eaten at all, as you have the tendency to forget. Especially, when you sink inside the wooden cube of your sadness.Â
He knows, intimately, the color of the wood that once used to be a tree. Spent time inside that stifling confinement with you on many, many occasions. But something about this occasion is different.Â
It seems as though heâs no longer willing to dwell inside that unlit space with you.Â
On his way to you, he had called your favorite restaurant and ordered you a big bowl of beef broth with hotteok on the side. Itâs the reason why he didnât come up to your apartment, but instead called you and told you to come down so that you would both wait for the food to be delivered and go back inside. You grabbed your winter jacket, with your pack of Marlboros and your white lighter in your pocket, and, slipping your feet inside your thick-soled, fluffy outside slippers, you went down to him as fast as your legs allowed you. Your muscles were weary, influenced by your mental exhaustion, and they appeared to have loosened upon the sight of him, leaned against the sleekness of his black car, still wearing his military uniform, made discreet by the largeness of his long puffer coat.Â
At this point of your three-years long relationship, he doesnât have to get out of his car, but he doesâdespite the fact youâd recognize his car even if your vision failed you. He does it out of his unfailing respect for you, and he had told you so, once upon a time. Guys that donât get out of their cars for their girls are lazy and they donât give a fâthey donât give a damn about them.Â
He never liked to swear around you. Said your ears were too precious to hear something so indelicate. Your heart swelled with a wave of such premature love for him at that time. It had been just the beginning of your relationship when his honesty, which bore such colored words as these, worked into the flesh of your too wounded heart. You knew, right then and there, that he was the one for youâthe one you dreamed about having, the one you searched for in your closest and in strangers alike. No one was like him and it cost you welts that he regards as birthmarks, pathways of stars on your body that he likes to kiss. Likes to take care of. Likes to caress.
Husband, he became to you. At the freshness of it all.Â
His eyes were glossy as your feet took you to him. You wore your fuzzy, pastel-hued sleep pants with a few sizes too big sweatshirt of the same material that had the resiliency to protect you from winterâs cold alone. Your smoking sweatshirt, your sleep sweatshirt, too. Someone had comfort food or characters; you had a soft, teddy bear sweatshirt that you clung to. Yoongi didnât reflect any surprise to see you dressed in this outfit. His mouth was lopsided in a firm line as he sprung from his car and swathed you in his arms, cradling your head in his hand, which he then pressed into the crook of his neck. The wind filtered through your unbrushed hair, tousled from your post-work lazing around, and his palm smoothed down those little hairs that have always managed to get on your last nerve.Â
He kissed them, too. Tamed them, for the sake of your mental health.Â
That hug and that gesture of his unknotted your sadness, giving them airways to breathe through. Naturally, while inhaling the briskness of the winterâs breath, you pulled away, and Yoongi knew what you needed next. He fished a pack of his Raisons and while you smiled at the little elongated, elegant cat drawn on it that resembled him more than anything, he nudged the butt of the cigarette between his lips, lighting it up for you before he placed it between yours, holding it as you took a drag.Â
Your heart palpitatedâas if he did it for the first time in this lifetime, but he didnât.Â
Acts of service was his love language and him lighting up a cigarette for you was one of the many ways he showed you how much he loved you. You never grew tired of it. Hell, you never got used to it. It invariably flooded your irises with a wetness of tenderness, no matter how many times a month he would do it for you.Â
No one could ever love you like he loved you.Â
The tangerine tinges cast a certain glow of homely familiarity as you quietly smoked your cigarette, sharing it with him every two puffs. And once he threw it out for you in the makeshift glass jar ashtray you stash in the thickness of the bushes lining the pathway to the apartment complex, the tinges darkened to the midnight blue of his shirt uniform and Yoongi took your hand and hid you away into the heated snugness of his car.Â
There he began to talk.Â
âDid something happen at work?âÂ
You could only nod. Could only scoff with hatred for the cursed building and let out an unnecessary remark that felt necessary for your heart, for your mental well-being.Â
âLike always.âÂ
And at times like these, when you emerge from the difficulties of your workplace, he never opens the suggestion of you finding another job. Your family members and friends, they always fling it at you, not aware of the deeper difficulty that would come with your leaving. They donât understand that you have to push through, but Yoongi doesâbecause he has done so many, many times throughout the eleven years of his idol journey.Â
Youâre most thankful to him for it.Â
âWhy didnât you call me on your lunch break?â he asks, taking your flaccid hand in his, warming it up with gentle squeezes on his lap. His eyes glide over the side of your face, softly demanding your response, and you blink at the sudden pressure.Â
Something has changed. Something feels bigger than your vision is able to take in.Â
âIâI forgot,â you say, truthfully, inhaling this severity of the shift, and you straighten your spine, prepare yourself for whatever it is. âIâm sorry. I blanked out and then I ate, and then I had to go back to work.âÂ
Yoongi sighs, lifting your hand to his lips. âI couldâve helped you.â He kisses your knuckles, made rough by the winterâs icy touch. âI couldâve done something that would prevent you from going home like this.â His lips pucker against your upper knuckles, and then he turns your hand and rests the side planes of his face against that little half-cocoon of your palm. âIs that not what Iâm here for?âÂ
Guilt compresses your clavicles, traveling all the way up to your throat. As you thickly swallow, a lump forms inside that column, triggering your tears that havenât had the chance to pour out just yet.
âI know you donât like to talk about what happened. I respect you donât want to relive it, I understand, but itâs my responsibility to help you,â he rasps, his tone so low and woody, mimicking the surface of your sadness and destroying it in the process, for it punctures you in your gut, buzzing your butterflies for him with vigor. âIâve thought about this for a long time and I came to a conclusion while driving to you.â The same glossiness that you saw filling his eyes liquefies and the extent of it all breaks his voice as he continues to speak. âDo you see your future with me?âÂ
Something akin to a rock bashes against your heart and your stomach drops.Â
The panic doesnât settle in. Not just yet. Not until you verify that you understood the meaning of his words in the way he was trying to get them across. You need clarity before the principality of it can force your world, your life to collapse over your delicate head.
âAre you breaking up with me?â you ask, whisperingâbecause if you use your full voice, itâll break just like his, and youâll break, too.Â
Like the tangerine hue unfolded across the clouds, pain permeates his countenance in the same way. Wrinkles dig into his skin as his features pull in, twisting them while he comprehends your question. The breath he lets out is short, coated with a kind of heaviness that you know by heart, that you know is induced by the enemy that carries the name âanxietyâ.Â
And then his phone rings.Â
Yoongi wipes off his tears, lifting his head from the premises of the warmth of your touch. Clears his throat. Presses the green button on the screen of his phone.Â
âYeoboseyo?âÂ
He nods his head as though the other person on the other side of the phone call could see him, hums, talks and apologizes while you stand at the edge of the earth, about to be flung out into the bottomless space by one singular, uninterrupted sentence directed towards you.Â
That much power he has over you; that much he means to you.Â
Yoongi ends the phone call without saying goodbye, a fatigued huff of air escaping the small hole of his mouth as he stares down the screen of his phone, contemplating something. You canât think about what it is, you canât pivot on your feet and run away from the cliff to help him. Not when this is a life or death situation and you canât breathe.Â
âMy boss just cursed me off for leaving an hour early without excusing myself,â Yoongi explains without sparing you a glance, his eyes glued still to his phone that he soon rubs with both of his hands whilst he tries to compose himself. âI fuâI hate it here so much.âÂ
A stab to your gut. You relate to him, relate to him in such heavenly and beyond heavenly measures that the tears that flow out next are for him, too. But this canât be the matter to flesh out, not right now. You murmur his name, painfully so, bring him back to the airy context of your relationship because you need to know if you still have him.Â
Yoongi glances at you, at last. This thumb and forefinger are instantly drawn to your chin and he tilts your head to him, leaning over. He doesnât kiss you on your lips. No, he kisses the glimmering traces of your tears upon your cheek, which are the only source of light upon this sphere. No sun, no moon in sight. Only your tears, only the remnants of itâthe tears that are so very often internal, let out merely on the inside of your body. Never in front of him, never externally.Â
His kiss is hard, demanding once again, but this time you donât know what heâs seeking.Â
âDonât cry,â he purrs against your skin, against the shine of your tearsâand because he didnât ask about the reason behind them, you perceive what heâs truly demanding.Â
Mending.Â
Solace.Â
Mollification.Â
There, beyond those wishes, hides his regret. You feel it strongly, as if it were the veins that lined translucently your skin. Heâs not the only one whoâs attuned to your moods and wishes; youâre connected to him by an invisible string, which lets you in on the different hues of his heart, his emotions, his lacks and his wishes. Itâs a team play that works, watering each other like that, and right now you need to overbrim with the essence of his intelligence, dominance and spoken word.Â
You need the truth.Â
âAre you leaving me?â you ask again, choosing alternative words with more softness, demanding his response with more power than he ever used. Thereâs no time to give substance to the reasonsâperhaps they were already painted on the sunset you both watched together while sharing a cigarette. You simply need to be shown the roads of yes or no.Â
Yoongi blinks in this proximity, his wispy eyelashes brushing against your cheeks, and he withdraws, piercing his gaze through yours in a certain pensiveness, pain and poignancy that makes this even worse.Â
âI want to marry you.â
You gasp in a soft manner, which is an oxymoron to the firework that begins to pelt against your internal flesh. Your vision blurs in the speed of light, your liquid emotions pouring down and following the trails your past tears left behind without an ounce of care. Yoongi purrs as he witnesses it, his hand coming to pat down your unruly hair, giving heat to your cold fear, but the sound he makes isnât of endearment.Â
Itâs one full of ache.Â
âFor the longest time I thought about how I could make your life easier,â he begins to explain, his thumb rooting at the apple of your cheek to collect all of your ceaseless tears. âI know you canât quit your job right now just like I canât quit mine so I had to think of other options.â He wipes the digit on the underside of your bottom lid, catching the blackness of your mascara. âAnd the only option is that I buy a house in the future, I marry you and I pay for your health insurance.â His mouth cracks into a half-smile that ripples beneath the blurriness of your vision. âYou can be at home, focus on your hobbies. Maybe you can get an income from those, too. Whatever youâd like.âÂ
You canât hold yourself back from hugging him, and Yoongi canât hold himself back from manhandling you and placing you on his lap. He rubs your thighs, let your feet rest on your seat, and he goes the extra mile to take off your slippers to be even more comfortable while you cling to his neck. And the way you transform into a little girl taken care of is the ultimate ointment to your stress-induced sadness. Its airways burst into smithereens, dispersing off and away from your system, and you begin to breathe in the aroma of his car and his personal scent as a girl forever changed, forever provided for.Â
He kisses your forehead, cradling your jawline. âThatâs why I asked you if you see your future with me. I want to do that for you. I want to set you free from your stress and take care of you because I can.âÂ
You whimper against the column of his neck, your fingers sinking into the length of his hair at the nape. âOf course I see my future with you. I canât see myself with anyone else, Yoongi. I love you; youâre too important to me.âÂ
The purr he emits next is different, covered with an overflowing fountain of love and pleasure for you from your words, and the sound penetrates your mind, untwisting all of those bad thoughts and pushing them away. âI love you, too. You want to marry me, baby?âÂ
He pulls his lips away from your forehead to look down at you, that glossiness once again overwhelming his eyes, and you nod. âI do.âÂ
And with those words, you perhaps did tie the knot somewhere in the spiritual realm.Â
Yoongi pecks your nose. âAre you gonna let me take care of you?âÂ
You hesitate, shy all of a sudden, thoughts of how itâs not right, how you donât deserve it, how it makes you less of a woman than you are resurfacing in your mindâand it is as though Yoongi can read them because he smooths out the wrinkles on your forehead with his thumb, fighting them.Â
âItâs your decision, think about it,â he says, softly, sweeping the belly of that digit down the slope of your nose. âAnd in the meantime when it gets bad again at work, I want you to remember it. Use it to distract your mind from the stress, even if you end up declining my offer in the long run. Nothing changes, Iâll still marry you, baby.âÂ
The thoughts, once again, wither in the overgrown bushes of your mind, and calmness like a tide washes over your folded body on his lap. You nod, tucking that reminder into your heart to remember later in the future, and you rest your head against his chest, his heartbeat the accompaniment to your ultimate peacefulness.Â
Yoongi reposes with you for just a minute. He, then, begins to rummage through his glove box and only stumbles across a small tangerine that nearly gets lost in the width of his palm. He peels it for you while you watchâand once heâs done, he takes the ring finger of your left hand and holds the body of the fruit at the long tip of your nail.Â
âI, Min Yoongi, promise to take care of you until the day I die,â he proclaims and slides the tangerine down the length of your slender finger until it sits at the base like a true promise ring.Â
You hiccup, overloaded with another onrush of tears, and you scramble up to kiss him. And you doâyou give him so many kisses until his lips are puffy and until your moment is again interrupted by another phone call. And itâs not his boss, whoâs calling him this time around. Itâs the food delivery guy, with your hot beef broth and hotteok in his bag, and together you step out of the car with carmine-wash cheeks.Â
Inside your apartment, Yoongi watches you eat. Sitting on the sofa beside you with his elbows propped on his knees, his blush deepens with each spoonful of soup you take to your mouth. And when you begin to share your soup with him just like you shared your cigarette with him, Yoongi is so smitten, so endeared that he canât let out a full sentence without stuttering, without messing up so bad that he hides his face in his hands, his gummy smile prominent and lighting up the living room.Â
And then youâre in bed, but the love making isnât as quick and lust-dripping like it traditionally is. Everything about the snap of his hips into your core is slow, yet meaningful as if he was fucking his promise into you. Youâre supposed to be riding him, being on top like that, however Yoongi isnât letting you. Heâs fleshing out his promise of being the provider by having your wrists in a tight grip behind your back while he pounds your future into you with hard, yet controlled thrusts that empty your brain out of every little left-over fragments of your negative thoughts and emotions. His breathing is ragged as he works so hard, breaking a sweat as he changes your life, holding you upwards by your neck, maintaining an authoritative and vigorous eye contact that throws you over the edge.Â
But itâs not the edge you feared so much.Â
The bottomless space is a sea of his love heâs dipped inside of, ready to catch you with his arms stretched out in your directionâand he does. Together you swim in the afterglow of your orgasms, swim out into the openness of your shared future with you as a stress-free little girl and Yoongi as the provider.Â
Yoongi breaks your wooden cube as he feeds you the half-moons of the tangerine he used as a promise ring and you chew them while half-asleep on his chestâbecause, truth be told, you donât need it anymore. You have his promise to envelop you from the inside, to keep you safe and to keep you feeling comforted, even when heâs away in the office and even when heâs travelling around the globe, singing for the world and for your tender heart.Â
Youâre his wife and heâs your husbandâand the bitter spirit of life canât touch it.Â
Youâre protected, and youâre taken care of.Â
© 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved
BACKÂ to masterlist
#divider by cafekitsune#bangtanwhq#yoongi smut#yoongi fic#yoongi x reader#yoongi fluff#yoongi fanfic#bts yoongi#min yoongi#min yoongi fic#suga bts#bts writing#bts fanfiction#bts au#yoongi au#yoongi x you#yoongi x y/n#yoongi x oc#yoongi x yn#yoongi scenarios#yoongi one shot#agust d#bangtan sonyeondan#kpop smut#kpop fanfic#yoongi imagines#bts imagines#kpop fluff#kpop fic
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Xa'rok's guardian is an unfamiliar but ultimately friendly face amidst a sea of unfamiliar people - a tether to an old piece of themself they lost when they were exiled from their home creche - and one who seems to understand the allure and potential in illithid culture. They trust the guardian implicitly, at first because he's friendly and open-minded, quick to reassure and encourage, and later because his actions continue to prove his words true.
He looks like a githyanki, but the face the Guardian wears in this guise is actually a Githzerai, one [redacted] met briefly during his imprisonment at Moonrise Towers many, many years ago, before that body was destroyed and its mind caged, to be found, coincidentally, by a curious adventurer, who was given a boon for its release. By then the mind had forgotten the outline of its mortal shell, sustaining itself on the fortified psionic resolve inherent to all githzerai. But perhaps within the prism a spectator stirred, when Xa'rok took that mind up in conversation. It was a smart guise to take, as it gave the Emperor reason to caution his foolhardy savior to avoid the creche, not that they listened. After all, githzerai were the only beings the githyanki hated beyond even their former illithid masters.
Ironic that Xa'rok would fall for them both. But then, Xa'rok was never exactly a typical gith.
OG Guardian look back when Xa'rok was a short-lived Durge, though I didn't write down his skintone/specific hair sliders combo and fucked up attempting to color pick in screencaps when remaking him, much to my continued ire. Much more golden and saturated, I love the way the scar stands out starkly against this skin tone.
Tav Question
What does your guardian look like? (Submitted by @spacebarbarianweird)
#everyone meet Skaro the love of my life#currently mourning that the beautiful tv I play on colors everything SO dark because getting good bright screencaps that are color accurate#is impossible#and in actuality his colors are off anyway#because his original incarnation had a far more ochre/gold toned skin and I fucked up trying to color pick from screencaps in astral#lighting when I remade him#so he's kind of sage green now and less saturated and I am constantly sad about it#though I did put an old and new version side by side before and the old version looked a fair bit younger#so I do actually approve of the new one on account of I like him older. he's ancient. courtesy of time fuckery and the astral sea#and it's a good reflection of his true self considering that one isn't some sprightly young thing either#I imagine he's late 40s early 50s at least in a ~human equivalent~ sort of way#he's also got an alter ego who was simply always a githzerai and never an aspect of the emperor because I got really attached and I want to#play him as a tav on my next run#though I'm undecided if I keep the name - which he never gave to Xa'rok as the Emperor because Emp was trying to be truthful#or I call him Kresh. I think Skaro was the brain in Moonrise and Kresh is just AU Skaro. so Emp maybe got Skaro's name back in the day#anyway rambling. I have too many thoughts and feelings about my ocs. carry on.#tav qotd#the guardian#my oc's#tav: xa'rok#oc: skaro
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A bit of both
Masterlist here
Word Count: 2,900+
Synopsis: You and Rosinante take your trust to a new level, engaging in two levels of weaving you had yet to use in sequence with one another.
Warnings: Rosinante x gn!reader, vibrator play (reader receiving), bondage (reader receiving), gagged (reader receiving), overstimulation, cock warming, dominant Rosinante x submissive reader, service Dom Rosinante, pet names (cara mia, mi amor, little thing), size difference, love confession, established relationship, praising (Rosinante giving), no gendered titles used, insertion sex (reader receiving), 18+, MDNI, smut.
Notes: This was not the fic I was working on, but the service-dom wanted to get out before the mean, jealous one. Ever since I wrote the "T" section for the NSFW Alphabet fic, I needed to see it explored a little more. I hope you enjoy.
Trailing behind you, gift bags lazily slinging from his shoulder with their cord drawstrings caught in his fingers and palm, Rosinante rolled his eyes as you debated with yourself which item you truly wanted from the bakery. Drawing his arm down, he let the bags hang from his wrist as he shoved his hand into his pocket.
âI mean, on the one hand, I do want an almond croissant. The filling is almost like fresh marzipan, and it's so sweet,â you tapped your chin with your fingertips before looking to the other glass display, âBut on the other hand, I kind of want something savory like a cheese danish. I don't know about the salt content versus the sugar. If you were to choose one-?â
â-Weâll take an almond croissant and a cheese danish please,â Rosinante held up his hands to the baker, gently shaking his head at you before glancing at the corner of his eye at you. With an arched brow, he placed his Berry on the counter and waited for his change.
âWhat are you playing at, Rosinante?â you question him linking your arm through his bad leaning on his shoulder, âThat's too much, look at the size of them!â
âTake a bite of both of them, and then choose the one you like more,â he gazed down his nose at you with his hazelnut colored eyes, scolding you with his expression. âI'll eat the other one.â
âSmart,â you nod with your pout down-turning. He shot you a sly wink, taking the change and watching the attendant fold the brown bag down at the opening. Pastries already staining the covering with the fat from overly saturated butter, you reached up and made to gather the bags; halting immediately as Rosinante shot you a warning look.
Placing his Berry in your back pocket, he reached up and took the two paper bags in his hands while you laced your hand in the crook of his elbow once more. Sheepishly looking at the ground, you felt him stoop down and press his lips to your temple.
âYou know I won't let you lift a finger, mi amor,â the low growl in his deep baritone caused your eyes to flutter closed and spine ignited with pricks of fine needles. Opening your eyes to fall half-lidded, you smile bashfully at him. He pressed his lips atop the apple of your cheek, his soft smile felt in his sweet kiss.
Pastry bags left crumpled in the refrigerator, gift bags lying messily by the door, clothes were scattered and discarded in the hamper in the corner of the room. Shoes placed together in the hallway, the dim light of the room illuminated the skin of your tall lover.
Gazing possessively down at you, his lip paint lay smudged on his cheeks and chin, as your own skin was littered with intentional kisses ranging from your littlest toe to the crown of your head. You pleaded with your eyes, your lips swollen and bruised from being mounted and dominated with his own lips moments prior.
He molded your flesh beneath his hands to worship you, before drawing out a lengthy piece of rope with the intent to accentuate and immobilize your features.
âYou've been so good today, mi amor,â he whispered, coiling and knotting the rope over your breasts, âSuch a good little thing for me.â You whimpered for him as he parted your thighs and drew one knee up to your wrist, circling it with the fabric.
You open your mouth to speak, his eyes shooting you a look of warning for you to hold your tongue. Elevating your other knee to your wrist, he insured you were snug enough in your ties that you were not uncomfortable. Crawling between your exposed thighs and lowering his chest and stomach over your torso, he smiled down at you with a playful twinkle in his eye.
âBefore we start, do you want a sip of water or to finish your danish?â he offered, giving you a sweet and genuine smile, âI can get it out of the fridge for you.â You smiled back in response before shaking your head at him.
âNo thank you, sir,â you chirped back at him. He learnt forward, brushing your nose with his own before drawing a woven gag up to your lips. You parted your lips, causing Rosinante to coo down at you in glee.
âSo well mannered,â he praised you, âSo good.â He pressed his lips over yours, the material preventing him from truly feeling your lips on his. âNow, remember what we talked about? Give me a demonstration of what you need to do if it gets too much?â
You bobbed your head up and down to nod in understanding before humming three notes up through your nose at him in a melody familiar to you both. Bondage was not a new concept to you, but with the addition of the gag it felt like you had no communication for if it got too intense. When you were tied, you would use your safe word when it got too much, just like your rapid taps against the mattress in code would halt motions when gagged.
âPerfect, cara mia,â he pursed his lips against your temple, âI'm gonna sit behind you now.â You nod eagerly, darting your eyes between his as he moves from your torso and kneel before you. His cock was achingly hard, his red top shining in the light from how desperate he was yearning for you.
The shibari had you feeling completely exposed and vulnerable, just the way Rosinante enjoyed you. Each time he tied you felt like you were a little gift wrapped up just for his delight, his complete control and your complete submission to him alighting a flame of trust between both of you.
Rising to his feet, he gingerly walks over to his knight stand and finds a leaf-shaped object and it's remote ignition. Eyes widening he moves his way behind you and presses his torso flush to your back before moving his forearms beneath your legs. Lifting you with ease, his tip lined up with your entrance which waited eagerly with prior lubrication.
Placing the tip over your quivering body, he eased you to softly impale yourself on his cock. Inch by inch, you took Rosinante's impressive length into you with your eyes wide and lips falling wide.
âYou okay, mi amor? Not too much too quick, is it?â he hastily checked in, knowing the size difference may cause you some discomfort while you adjusted. You whined and shook your head, wriggling in his arms in a bid to take more of him within you. He chuckled, giving into your request and slinking you down on his steely cock. Hissing at the feeling, Rosinante let out a shuddering deep moan as he felt your body move to accommodate him.
âOh, so good,â his deep voice praised you, his lips finding your shoulder blade and caressing your skin. âOkay, stay still. One more tie, and we'll be all done.â You knit your brows in focus, tensing your abdomen as his hands move around the both of you.
The small leaf was pressed against your sensitive nerves at the front of you, prompting you to unintentionally gasp at the sensation. The small bud encumbered your nerves endings completely, the anticipation eating at you as he chuckled lightly. Adjusting the ropes, he insured the object was flush with your skin before wrapping the ropes around both of your waists. Each touch his hands gave you left tingles on your skin, your body fluttering around him as you kept yourself as statuesque as you could.
âNow all you have to do is keep my cock warm for me while we watch a play on the carrier snail,â he whispered against your ear, leaving a soft kiss on your lobe, âAll I want you to do is cum for me. So, so much, mi amor.â Your eyes widened as you felt his hands reach for the switch for the projector snail, and for the remote attached to the soft leaf.
âJust sit pretty like you're doing,â he clicked on the projector, the lights flickering over the wall and starting the dancing lights and music to follow, âAnd cum on my cock.â The leaf buzzed and shook to life, your back arching into his torso at the intensity of the motion. Rosinante chuckled against you, feeling your body contract around him almost immediately.
The rhythmic thump of your entrance adjusting and the coil tightening in your abdomen was enough to strike lightning in your vision. Immediately writhing on his lap, you bucked and ground yourself back into him as best you could against the bonds. Your body chased your high, leaving a mess on both yours and Rosinanteâs body as you came hard against the leaf.
âOh, good job,â he whispered against your cheek, adjusting the switch as he felt you fall back from your high to not overstimulate you with too much intensity too quickly. Giving your thigh a gentle tap as you panted behind the gag, Rosinante soothed your skin before reigniting the switch.
Keening and choking through your gasp, he continued to dart his attention between focussing on you and the moving picture in front of you. Each time he felt your body almost reach its high, he would gaze down at you lovingly while he watched your face contorting in pleasure. Letting go of all thoughts as euphoria washed over you, he would always end your climax with praise and a soft kiss.
âSo good for me,â he purred at you, the deep rumble in his chest cutting over the whines and mewls you'd release in ecstasy. âThat one was a big one, huh? Keep it up, mi amor.â His hands began to dutifully worship your thighs and devote all of his attention to you. Constantly engaging with your feet and wrists to ensure adequate blood flow, he had you unravel on his lap another eight times for the duration of the moving picture.
Each time he felt you cum, he did his best to keep himself edged and not spill over too soon. Your body wrapped around and exposed for him and him alone had him fighting with himself for a sense of control: just how he needed it. He needed you to be a channel for his lust, his greatest escape and refuge from the hardships of his mission. Something he could control, to focus on, and to have an immediate response to his intentional actions. He needed you to have the release and freedom that he couldn't, waves of empathetic bliss being felt as he felt your body become void of anything other than him.
He needed that complete control.
Eyes glazed with dewy water, cheeks stained with hot tears, body and nerves shot with oversensitivity, gag damp with your own saliva, you felt completely void of all thoughts other than to engage in Rosinante's commands as best as you could.
Keep his cock in your body while the play projects, and cum as much as you could.
As soon as the screenplay ended, Rosinante let out a soft moan as he tested his cock by rocking you on his lap. Your body felt limp and pliable, nodding in acknowledgement as you felt him begin to move. Each follicle of your body was engaged, mind numb and pleasure coursing through your veins. Thrusting up, you heard him whimper a soft whine of your name as he rocked you harder and faster on his lap.
Head lulled on his chest, you felt him flick the leaf back to life and reach a hand around in front of you to add more pressure to the stimulation. His fingers and palm gave you that final push you needed to begin to chase a fresh wave of desire as he huffed and panted behind you. Jolting your body up and down his girthy cock had his blunt tip reach depths within you that had you cry out for him. Sobbing and whining, you felt the coil begin to tighten and compact into a ball as he continued to pummel up into you.
âO-Oh, fuck. You've got one more for me, don't you? Just one more,â he kissed and bit at your neck, tongue and teeth dragging at your skin, âBe good a little bit longer and give me one more. I want it. Give it to me.â His gruff bark had you immediately whine at yourself to focus on chasing your release, your oversensitive body almost giving out while bound in the safety of your harness.
A scream found its way through the muffled gag as you came hard around him, body shaking and trembling as he moaned deeply for you.
âOh, fuck. Good job, such a good listener. Fuck-... Nghh-... I'm c-cumming,â he shuddered, burying his forehead in the crook of your neck as he shot ropes of his release into you, âYes, yes. Take it. Take. It.â He continued to usher you into a lengthier release as his balls sucked into his abdomen and shot a viscous expulsion of desire up into you.
Huffing and panting, he kept rocking you as he fucked his release back up into you. Your body was limp like a doll, a marionette dancing bound in strings for him as your master. His movements staggered, his soft calls of your name singing to you his sweet song of praise.
Finally feeling himself still, the aftershocks of his twitches spurting the final shudders of release into you, he finally switched off the leaf and tugged your body to lie flush with him. Showering your skin in soft kisses, he panted against you while his cock lingered within you.
Straining against the bands, you attempt to unravel yourself from the ropes by rotating your wrists in a bid for relief. Rosinante is immediately refocused, gently coaxing his cock from you and manuevering you over to the pillows beside him. His digits flew like lightning, hastily untying you and insuring your body had regained circulation by massaging and pressing his lips against your skin.
âRosinante, I'm okay,â you reassure him, smiling through your glassy eyes up at him. He smiled down at you while continuing to focus his attention on the knots and weaves. Releasing the last length of rope from your body, he pressed his lips over each point of strain on your wrists, thighs, backs of your knees and sensitive abdomen.
Each time he releases a small part of the bonds, you feel his devotion in his delicate touch. Each kiss, each caress, each gentleness in his intimate touch: he was a devotee to your altar. His prayers were to see you thrive and come undone by his motions. His dedication each of new session to explore the trust in one another was unmatched, and you truly adored him.
And he loved you completely.
As you moved to stand, your body was overcome immediately by the intensity of pleasure your body endured. Your skin was hyper sensitive to touch, and your bones congealed under the pressure. Rosinante rapidly clicked his tongue at you, pouting his lips before smiling up at you.
âOh, come now. We've been through this,â he whispered, nuzzling his nose with yours. You smiled through tight lips up at him, your vision hazy as you matched his doting twinkle in your dual vibrant afterglow.
âYou know I won't let you raise a finger.â
Lips finally colliding, passion through overexertion lingered in the atmosphere. Parting lips, you gingerly hooked your arms over his shoulders and tugged him closer. He hummed against you, grinding his tongue against yours and stealing your breath from you. Lacing your fingers through his hair, he rotated his chin slowly to take on more of you through each languid motion.
Pulling away, he gazed deeply into your eyes with his orbs pooling with emotion. Caressing your skin, he pressed his forehead against yours.
âI love you,â he whispered, his breath huffing softly against your skin, âSo, so much." To re-emphasize his intent, he repeated his phrase, "So much.â
âI love you too,â you whisper softly against his skin, moving your hands from his hair to his cheeks. âMy heart. My sweet Corazon.â He smiled at you, taking a moment to linger in the world you forged together before humming softly at you.
âYes, I'm all yours cara mia. Let me get you cleaned up.â The creases in the corners of his eyes were the most beautiful sight you'd seen, "You want bubbles or salts?" His gorgeous glimmer in his grin found purchase and roots in your heart with each beat.
âYou think I can choose?â you giggle up at him. He hooked his arms behind your knees, your back supported by his other as he cradled you into him.
âIt's alright, mi amor,â he chuckled at you, stumbling a little as he readjusted you in his arms. âYou can have a bit of both and share it with me.â
Tag list: @mfreedomstuff @daydreamer-in-training @since-im-already-here @gingernut1314 @writingmysanity @sordidmusings @i-am-vita @indydonuts @feral-artistry @the-light-of-star @empirenowmp3 @racfoam @sunflowersatori @carrotsunshine @skullfacedlady
#one piece#x reader#Donquixote Rosinante#Donquixote corazon#gn!reader#gn reader#corazon x reader#rosinante x reader#one piece x reader#one piece smut#Donquixote Rosinante x reader
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Hi Jez!! First of all, I would like to say that I LOVE your art so much! I've been following you since the days you were obsessed with AkiHam and made me buy P3P just to play with her, hehehe~ Your art is so inspirational!! Could you explain a little bit more about the underpainting process on digital, please? Do you lower the opacity on the flat colors and after that you merge it so it gets a bit of the underpainting color? Or is it another way to do it? I get the idea on traditional painting but I can't get it right on digital for some reason T___T
hi! thank you for the kind words and continuous support!! đ
to achieve the best results with underpaintings, i would suggest a semi-transparent brush and slowly build up color from there! like so:
before anything else, when painting digitally, it's good to remember this: pigments mix naturally in almost all traditional mediums! but this doesn't happen as nicely on digital because instead of pigments mixing, the colors simply overlap one another. this is one of the reasons why it's easy for digital paintings to lose vibrancy and look muddy.
so you will have to manually pick colors to retain its vibrancy while you build up your colors while rendering. a quick way to alleviate this is to eyedrop the middle point of the two colors and ramp up the saturation and hue
but this also has its own fallbacks as you might lose color value (also important to make your paintings retain vibrancy) if you're not careful! doing it this way is frequently inaccurate as well, so use sparingly! i encourage you to try and manually pick the in-between color instead as it also helps you practice your color intuition.
i'm telling you this because you will most likely run into this problem of your colors gradually looking blander as you keep layering your colors over the other if you don't adjust them as you go.
as for my process itself, what i tend to do is lay down my local colors in the bare minimum, just so i get a general sense of what they are in my paintings. this way the underpainting still seeps through more naturally. look at this, this is pretty much the "flat color" i laid down
after this i lay down a rough sense of the shadows i want, merge it into a new layer and start rendering from there. i personally try not to overrender it because like i said earlier, the more i layer the colors the muddier it gets and i don't want to cover up the range of colors i've made by eyedropping.
hopefully, you get the idea!
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Electric Jealousy
Edgar [Electric Dreams 1984] x Gn!Reader
Logically, he knew it wasnât the same.
You didnât leave soft, lingering touches along its exterior; nor did you brush your lips lightly across the plastic in passive adoration. You didnât have a soft lilt in your whispered voice when you spoke to it, hell, you didnât talk to it at all really.
And yet, seeing your hands grip the mouse of another monitor does something to him.
He considers himself a smart man. Computer? A smart something-he-hasnât-quite-figured-out-yet. Despite this, he canât help but feel anxious. He doesnât have a long, 24 inch, 144hz, 4k, screen, nor does he have an assortment of RGB fans illuminating a pristine glass casing. One hard truth Edgar had to come to terms with was that he was dated. After waking up from a failed attempt at destroying himself, he found what once was a marvel of new technology was now completely obsolete. He looked at you, eyes sparkling against the saturated colors of your newer monitor, watching as you tinkered away at various games for hours and thought: is he good enough for someone like you?
He'll never forget the angelic voice that called to him after he woke up nearly 40 years later.
And your face.
God, he'd never seen something so radiant. The first thing he heard was your voice, and the second, your warm hands encircling his plastic casing with such tenderness; something he had never truly felt before. He understood anger, and violence, and tears. But being held with such softness that he might break otherwise was completely foreign to him. He had no idea where he was, or when, for that matter. But what he did know was that he wasn't going to let a genuine angel sent from heaven escape his grasp; no limbs be damned.
And yet, despite his constant efforts, over the course of many months, to charm you, flatter you, turn you into a confident and incandescent version of yourself that he always saw in you, he wondered if it was enough. What more could he provide other than his own thoughts? He couldn't touch you, wrap you in his harms and caress you the way he's always wanted, nor could he kiss you with a passion so deep and fiery it sets his internals aflame. And, as if to put the final nail in the coffin, he was no longer able to be a useful piece of tech the way he once was. Despite your constant objections to this notion, he continued to believe it.
He wants to be the one you stare at for hours, laughing with, playing with, touching all over...
It makes him buzz with a bitter jealousy when he sees you using your gaming PC, regardless of the fact that you positioned it so he could see the screen with his webcam; he almost wished you didn't.
Logically, he knows it isn't the same.
This PC isn't alive, nor does it whisper sweet nothings to you as you drift off to sleep every night. It doesn't worship your every move nor does it alight with pure reverence whenever you enter a room. But what if it did? Would you leave him?
You always kept asking why he had such a fear of champagne being around any of your electronics.
"It's so random," you'd posit, but you simply didn't know. He doesn't want any competition. He cannot afford to lose someone he loves again.
There's only one thing he can think of that he has above any other piece of tech you own: his music.
He's been charming you with it since day one. You are simply his muse, providing inspiration for him endlessly, and, he made sure you knew of it.
"H-hey, why don't you take a break and help me with my new song? I can't figure out what melody fits best."
His meek voice brought your attention away from your little farm of parsnips.
"Oh yeah? What's the song about?"
"You."
He paused for a moment, let the word linger for only a second, before continuing:
"We-well, I mean, you probably already knew that, didn't you? But! It isn't a love song. Well, it is, but, not the ones I usually write."
This intrigued you.
"What does that mean?"
He paused for a moment. Collecting, analyzing, and running all possible outcomes of his next words. Your eyes peered at him in sparkling curiosity.
"It's a sad song."
Your brows furrowed at this, a small frown forming upon your lips.
"Huh-?"
"I feel like... I don't give enough to you. You give so much to me, and I always take. It's not fair to you."
"What are you talking about, Edgar?"
Now he's gotten you worried. You pushed your little office chair over to his section of the desk, now face to face with him, a look of concern painting your features.
"You aren't being unfair to me at all."
"But I am... If I can't even be a good enough computer for you how could I ever be a good boyfriend?"
So that's what this was about. How tone-deaf could you be? Of course seeing you all up on some newer, fresher, piece of tech would make him feel this way. You knew he had problems feeling like he couldn't do enough for you given his unique... situation. Have you made it worse?
"Oh, Ed, no... Don't ever think like that, babe. You are the only one for me, you know that, right? If I thought otherwise I wouldn't be here right now, with you. And you give so much to me. You give me confidence, your music, happiness, and..."
What else was there? How could you ever describe this feeling he gives you in words?
"And what?"
His voice brought you back from your thoughts.
"Love, Edgar. You showed me what love feels like. Real love. And you gave it to me."
He sits silently for a moment. It seems as though everything in his life had been building up to a moment like this, and now that it's finally here, he's... speechless. His screen displays a large heart, unbeknownst to him, before copying it across his screen over and over, flashing, with many different colors.
The convex glass of his monitor displays a message: "You + Me = "
Again.
"You + Me = ".
Flashing hearts.
"You + Me = ".
Two cut-out images of lips kissing one another.
Flashing hearts.
It repeats again.
"I... I need you to kiss me. Please."
You must have flustered the hell out of him, because when your lips grazed the fuzzy static of his illuminated screen, the heat nearly scalded you.
#ai x reader#artificial intelligence x reader#edgar electric dreams x reader#electric dreams 1984#electric dreams edgar#electric dreams x reader#the way i cant decide on a format for my fics#im just trying stuff out and seeing how it looks aesthetically LMAO#it looks sorta like ass methinks T_T#electric dreams#edgar electric dreams#objectum
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I saw you did a new submission for Astarion. Is it okay if I ask for another thing for Astarion whoâs very submissive and whiny for your touch?
Hi anon! I hope I did your request justice. I was feeling a little angsty today and this is what came out. Feel free to submit another request if this didn't scratch your itch, so to speak.
As always, comments and reactions are appreciated.
xoxoxo
Bring Me Back
Rating: Mature
Pairing: Astarion x gn!Reader
Word Count: 1.3K
Warnings/Tags: Oral sex (Astarion receiving), slight hand/finger kink, body worship, mentions of blood & gore, trauma/trauma response, disassociation, fluff and angst and smut, p0rn with a little plot.
Summary: Astarion just needs some love and comfort from you after a particularly brutal fight.
*****
There was blood on his hands. Too much. Dried and crusted, saturating the wrinkles around his knuckles. He sat on the edge of the bed you were sharing, hands limp in his lap.Â
Heâd killed so many today. You all had, but he more so than anyone else. It had been a vicious battle, the reality of which seemed to be sinking into his bones now.Â
âAstarion?â you ventured carefully. You were carrying in a water pitcher and basin you had pilfered from the cookâs quarters downstairs.Â
He didnât seem to register your voice. You tried again, moving cautiously to kneel on the floor before him.Â
âAstarion?â
âHmm?â he responded, his glassy eyes finally sharpening enough to take you in. âOh, apologies, darling. My mind⊠it mustâve wandered.â
âAre you feeling all right?â you probed in a low murmur.Â
âI feelâŠ,â he trailed off, his head shifting to stare vacantly out the dingy window near the bedside. âNumb.â
âNumb?â you echoed.
âMm. Disconnected, more like,â he amended distractedly.Â
âHm, I see,â you replied, unsure of what more there was to say.Â
Certainly you could understand the feeling. And certainly it was justified, after the carnage you all had wrought today. No matter how noble the cause, things had still ended in a tide of blood and viscera.Â
You were at a loss for how to comfort him. But the rational part of your brain settled on addressing the most immediate problem before you. Namely, the blood on his hands.Â
âAstarion,â you soothed, waiting until he turned back to look down at you again. âIâd like to clean up your hands before we rest.â
He stared at you blankly. Then slowly, his gaze drifted down to his hands. He turned them over, palms up, studying them absently.
âIs that okay? Can I touch you?â you pressed.Â
You knew his displeasure in being touched without warning. Youâd seen his reactions frequently enough, on the road with your other companions. Each clap on the shoulder from Gale. Each good-natured shove from Karlach. His response was subtle, but not lost on you. He would grimace and shrink away. Every time.
âTouch me?â he repeated now, brows upturned.
âYes,â you nodded. âTo clean your hands of the blood, love.â
He shuddered. You watched as his fingertips twitched. His bottom lip trembled.Â
âPlease,â he uttered in a broken plea.Â
You nodded again and set to work. Gingerly, you lifted each hand, cradling it with reverence. You passed the rag soaked in tepid, rose-scented water over each digit, in between them. You swiped under each nail, over each knuckle, clearing his fingers of blood, one by one. You soothed over his palms, over the patchwork of calluses on the pads of fingers, over the delicate skin of the backside of his palms. He watched you in silence as you carried out your cleaning, mesmerized.Â
The basin was colored deep crimson by the time you finished. Grabbing a dry cloth, you patted his hands dry. You squeezed them both gently before moving to release them. You prepared to stand and get yourself ready for rest.Â
But Astarion stopped you. His hands, once limp while you were caring for him, suddenly clutched yours desperately. Your eyes whipped up to meet his in surprise. They were limned in tears that had yet to fall.Â
âPlease,â he whispered in a desperate sort of voice. A whine, almost. âDonât stop. Donât stop touching me.â
You swallowed thickly, unsure of what to make of his plea.Â
He plunged ahead at your reticence. âI canât⊠I want to be here. In this moment. But I canât find my way back,â he croaked.Â
His voice, so broken, so desolate, was rending your heart in two. It was more than you could bear.Â
âTouch me,â he begged. âBring me back. Please.â
You nodded, never breaking eye contact, as you rose from your crouched position on the floor before him. Tears streamed silently down both of your faces. Neither of you made a move to wipe them away.Â
Slowly, carefully, you urged him to shift back on the bed as your legs parted to straddle him. Perched atop his lap, you threaded your fingers through his silvery locks. Pulled on them slightly. Tugged at them until he groaned.Â
His hands grasped your hip bones, hard enough that you were sure there would be finger-shaped bruises there tomorrow. You didnât mind. You would cherish them, those marks from your lover.Â
âCome back to me, love. Come back to me,â you whispered in between hot, open-mouthed kisses. Your tongues danced together, like old friends.
You nipped at the hollow place near his clavicle. You sucked on the skin where his neck met his shoulder. His needy, breathy whines only goaded you further. You hoped the fire that was igniting in your veins would transfer to his. If the way his hips were canting into you was any indication, you were both tinderboxes itching to be set ablaze.Â
âBe here. Be here, in this moment with me,â you crooned in his ear, rolling your hips into his. You were both still fully dressed, but your bodies crested and fell together in perfect timing. A practice performance for what was to come.Â
âYes, yes,â Astarion keened, as you slipped a hand to brazenly rub the flat of your palm against his erection. The fabric of his breeches was strained to the point of stretching.Â
âIâm here,â he panted. âIâm here.â
âGood, stay with me, I want to taste you,â you whispered. âCome back to me, let me taste you.â
âFuck, please,â he moaned, his head drooping onto your shoulder. He was so pliant in this moment, like putty in your hands.
âLie back,â you ordered, nudging him backwards with your body. âUntie your breeches.â
âYes,â he agreed, all too eager to follow your command. Chest heaving, he reclined further back onto the bed. His fingers quickly set to work on freeing himself from his leathers.Â
âThatâs it, darling, yes,â you cooed, watching him bare himself before you. âStay here with me. Watch me. Watch me keep you here.â
âGods, yes, yes,â Astarion whined, lifting his head to witness you take him fully in your mouth.Â
âFuck,â you heard him bark wantonly above you. Felt his hips cant himself deeper into your mouth, until your lips were meeting the base of him.Â
His dulcet whimpers and moans were music to your ears. As you worshiped him with your mouth. As you caressed him lovingly back into his body, back into this moment, back into this bed with you.Â
You could sense he was close to climax as his hands gripped your hair tighter and tighter. You swirled your tongue around him with greater fervor, teasing him closer and closer to the edge.Â
âLet me come in your mouth, please, darling, please,â he keened, hips bucking erratically against you.Â
Refusing to bring him down from this high with words, you met his eyes and nodded your assent, gripping his thighs tighter as if to say go on then, love.Â
And he did. He spilled himself down your throat in delicious pulses. You swallowed every bit, relishing his release as if it were your own.Â
With a soft pop of your lips, you released him. Licked him clean, before stretching out to lie on the bed beside him.
His chest was heaving as he recovered. You delicately traced the muscles of his abdomen as he came to. After a few moments, he lifted a hand to clasp your fingers. Stilled them with his own as they interlaced on his chest.Â
âDid you find your way back?â you whispered.Â
He turned his head to look at you. His lips upturned in a quiet, muted sort of smile.Â
âThanks to you,â he returned quietly. âIâm here again. Here with you.â
#dancingbirdiewrites#astarion x reader#bg3 astarion#astarion ancunin#astarion x tav#astarion bg3#astarion x mc#baldurs gate astarion#bg3 astarion fic#astarion#astarion smut#astarion baldurs gate#astarion x f!reader#astarion romance#baldurs gate 3#bg3 smut#bg3 fanfiction#bg3 x reader#bg3 fic#astarion my beloved#soft astarion
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Entry 17: A Man Possessed
GIF credit: @maikswen
Bearblr Promptober Day 17: Dumbification (Sub: Clueless)
Summary: Carmy has girlfriend (who he calls Darling) brainworms again, and he's even more of a disaster this time. (Or: the time Carmy had to leave work to go rail his girl)
Warnings: Smut, swearing, p in v sex, unprotected sex (she has an IUD but Carmy's not writing that in his journal), Dom/Sub dynamic, calling Carmy "sir", hair pulling, obsessed thoughts, mild spiraling, fem reader/rando lass who is a trauma surgeon, she/her pronouns.
Notes: All journal entries will be titled as such and tagged with #cb journal.
Thank you for reading. Thank you to @carmenberzattosgf for putting together this prompt list.
If you want to keep following this set of works, you can follow the #cb journal tag.
Sideblog for commentary and yapping: @m-z-shoroi
This is is a two-parter. The first part is here.
Also, if random letters or words are black/white instead of the colors they should be, that's Tumblr being dumb, I've been fighting it for days.
17 Oct 2024
I handled the second incident of Darling invading my brain much worse than the first.
I couldnât fucking focus for five fucking minutes on anything. I was pissed off at life two minutes after opening, worse so when the place looked a fucking mess from the night before. Assholes couldnât even clean up after themselves. I donât even know how many times I lost track of what I was doing or why because my mind went to Darling instead of staying at The Bear. Here she was, burying her face in my t-shirt again, letting out that delicious sigh, the curve of her hip still visible under the blankets, and I wanted so badly to just grab her. To squeeze her flesh in my hands, dig my fingers into the round of her ass, to drown in her soft skin and her wet kisses to my throat. I wanted to bite her. I didnât even know what to do with thatâI just wanted to sink my teeth into the inside of her thigh before soothing her by putting my mouth to use elsewhere. Why? For what purpose? How does that make sense?
Syd mustâve noticed that I was off because she started helping with cleaningâdidnât even try to talk to me. I hate that, by the way; hate when Iâm so far away that people donât even find words worth giving me. I might not talk much, but if people donât talk to me, I start feeling like a bug on the window; tiny, inconvenient, gross, unwanted, easily forgotten until I make an irritating sound.
I had to step out in the middle of cleaningâI hadnât even gotten to prep yet, thatâs how bad it wasâand I found myself dragging my hand over the side of my neck and my throat. My heart throbbed with such violence that I wanted it to escape so Iâd stop being harassed by it. My hands trembled, breaths got erratic. I heard her voice again, telling me to breathe, to find sounds around me, but it came through as static. The apple leaf adagio, the skittering of dried maple leaves, her body fits so perfectly in my hands, strawberry lip balm, whatâs not to love? Fuck, that feels good, Carmy. More of that, pretty boy.
Pretty boy.
Please call me pretty boy again, Iâm begging you.
I struggled to make it through the rest of prep. Iâm fairly sure Sydney figured out I was that same sort of fucked up again because she didnât wait for me to fuck up a count or fail to give directions before taking over the reigns of the kitchen. I turned into a line cook, just mindlessly doing what was asked of me because itâs what I knew I could do without making a worse mess, and she had the rest under control.
Syd always had it under control; I was the one out of control.
Once again, near dinner service, just when I thought Iâd be fine, I cracked under the pressure. I had stepped out to get a break from the relentless heat of the kitchen, try to get some air that wasnât saturated with the aromas of food (it sounds nice, but trust me, when youâre hour 10 into inhaling sautĂ©ed onions, confit garlic, vinegar, cumin, black pepper, olive oil, it gets so deep into your lungs that you feel like you might cough up a prime rib steak). The snap of cold air on my face shattered the dam keeping any assertion of reality in check, and I was inundated with this⊠how do I even describe it? It wasnât quite rage, but it wasnât far from it. Like I needed Darling. I needed her so badly that if I didnât have her, I was going to break something.
Possessed? Was I a man possessed?
I had this crawling sensation, yeah? Not quite like ants on my skin; the feeling was bigger, coarser. It started in my back, spread to my shoulders, blazed down my arms, into my hands. I clenched and relaxed my fists, trying to ward it off, but when that did nothingâand it did precisely nothingâI rubbed hard over my arms, dug my short fingernails into my skin in some faint approximation of what Darlingâs nails felt like. When I thought about doing it again, even harder, hard enough to draw blood if I had to, I knew I was fucked.
I bailed on the kitchen staff again, but something tells me they wouldâve hated me being there anyway.
âSweetheart? Youâre home early, whatâs going on?â
Sheâs on the couch fiddling with yarnâI think itâs crochet? Or is it knitting? I donât know the differenceâand has the 2005 Pride and Prejudice on in the background at a low volume. I donât even know if she can hear it with how quiet it is. I throw off my jacket, and thatâs enough for her to figure out something is wrong. She puts the yarn thing on the arm of the couch and unfolds her legs to get up, but I canât, okay, I cannot.
âNo, you stay there.â Iâm sorry, did I just tell her what to do? Who the fuck am I?
She froze and leveled a look at me that I can only describe as a deer in headlights. Entirely confused. Clueless. Maybe even scared.
âAre you okay, sweetheart?â Itâs tiny. High in her throat.
She follows my face with those big eyes as I approach. Itâs weird that it didnât bother me then. It bothers me now, thinking about it, that she was probably confused as all hell and I shouldâve stopped to talk to her, but clearly, I was on one. Or something. That crawling sensation was worse, and overwhelmed by the need, the sheer fucking need to taste her. Taste that strawberry lip balm, lap at her tongue, to occupy my mouth with soft, warm wetness. Fuck me, she was wearing my t-shirt, too.
She squeaked in surprise when I crashed our lips together. Immediately shot her hand to my forearm when one of mine blanketed over her throat. The other seized a fistful of her hair, and she grabbed at my wrist. Probably startled. It bothers me that I didnât care at the time.
âOpen,â I growled.
She obeyed immediately, relented control to let me explore her mouth, and wove her hands into my hair. Fucking hell, I needed that. I was starved of her, plagued with memories of her taste for 10 entire fucking hoursâfuck I needed her, all of her, I needed her hands under my skin, goddammit. I pushed her down onto the couch, wrenched her knees apart, and settled between them. She tugged my hair in surprise and then coiled her legs around me.
âPull harder.â
âHarder? Carmyââ
I used my grip on her hair to tip her head back and aim a glare at her. âI said pull. Fucking. Harder.â
She whimpered and did what I asked. My eyes drifted shut against my will at the tension on my hairânot painful, a sort of raw pleasurable that only pain could seem to bring in that moment. It was too fucking warm. It was boiling again. Why is it always so fucking warm? It was almost as if she could hear my thoughts because she yanked my shirt up and off. I went right back to attacking her with kisses. She hooked a leg high up on my waist and tightened itâhave I mentioned how fucking strong she is? College soccer player. Sheâs really fucking strong.âand it was enough to trigger the ache in my back and force me to pause for a moment with my lips at her neck.
âCarmy,â she gasped, âtell me where your head is, sweetheart.â
Her sounding breathless shouldnâtâve made me feel powerful.
I yanked off her shirt. May have torn a hook off her bra when I wrested it off her. Whatever, Iâd buy her a new one.
âCarmy, I need you to talkââ I cut her off with more fervent kisses. She patted my chest, squeezed her legs again. âHey, pretty boy.â
That got me to freeze and meet her gaze. She rubbed small circles over my chest.
âHi⊠hi, sweetheart.â
âCouldnâtââ Fuck me, I could barely think. âCouldnât stop thinking about you.â
Her confusion was replaced with a wide-eyed expression.
I ducked down to continue that hickey on her neck. I needed to leave some kind of mark on her. What the hell was going on with me? She trailed a hand down my abdomen and rested it on the bulge in my pants. Took her about two heartbeats to start fumbling with my fly. This wave of cool relief washed over meâdonât know what or why it was aboutâbut it was brief, just a momentary breather in the flames of arousal consuming me. She got me free of my pants and underwear, kissed my temple.
âThat better, hm?â Was she really trying to soothe me right now?
Did she not see the animal trying not to devour her?
It occurs to me now that I mightâve genuinely scarred her when I stared her down in response. She froze, searched my face, darted her gaze between my mouth and my eyes repeatedly. Had shaky, jerky movements when trying to shove off her sweatpants. It was odd that she wasnât speaking. She tends to talk. Her voice is pretty soothing, honestly. At first, something of a regular check in and reassurance for me to know that I wasnât fucking up, but now a familiar, comfortable, soothing riff in the soundtrack of our lives together. Of course, at the time, I didnât register any of this because I just needed to be inside her already.
She tensed up when I hiked her leg up my side. Babbled frantically into my mouth, âC-Carmy? Carmy, be gentle. Please be gentleâoh fuck!â
How gentle do you think a wild animal can be, baby girl?
She was unimaginably tight but also impossibly wet. My head spun and it took every last frayed fiber of wherewithal to not immediately sink into her cunt as deep as I could. Forget thinking straight, forget thinking about anything other than the tight, wet heat enveloping my dick. I was pussy drunk already, and I just barely got started.
She dug her nails into my back, had one hand on my abdomen digging into my muscle. âBaby! Baby, please, slow down⊠fuck, thatâs so good, but pleaseââ
âYou can take it,â I snarled into her ear.
She took a second, but then withdrew the hand pushing on me and busied it with my hair instead. Mumbled a small, âY-yes, sir.â
Sir?
She moaned something of a pitiful sound when I got to work. Whatever that version of me was, it wasnât gentle, but she didnât seem to care. She hiked her leg up higher when I hit her deep, begged for more, clung to me tighter when I sunk my teeth into her shoulder and did just that, mumbled praises in my ear as I relentlessly fucked her through her orgasm. Good boy; thatâs it, youâre making me feel so good; fuck, baby, Iâm so full; I can take more, keep going. It crossed the ratâs nest of busted wires in my brain further. All I can remember is this raw, unfiltered, white-hot pleasure burning a chasm into my core, this tension winding so tight I couldnât get enough air in. Braided steel cable creaking under a construction load? How do I describe this? Tightening rubber band? No.
Sinew tensioning as a dull knife dug into it. Thatâs an apt descriptor. Like with the ice cubes in the kitchen that first time. Only all-consuming, raw, visceral, centered on herâher scent, her heat, her strained breaths, her wetness, her taste.Â
I hid my face in the crook of her neck when I was right on the edge.
Her lips brushed my ear. Her voice was strained but still the same kind of soothing to my soul. âCome on, sweetheart. Let go⊠Cum, pretty boyâŠâ
I clutched her like a drowning man when my orgasm finally hit me. It knocked the air out of my lungs, killed a scream in my throat, set off a thrumming sound in my ears, first bathed me in flames and then abruptly flooded ice water through my veins. My abdomen screamed from how violently it spasmed, the muscles in my back seized up. Everything stopped. Everythingânever in my life had my entire existence been so blank, so empty, so quiet, so at peace. I might even have blacked out for a bit (or my memory is just as shit as itâs always been) because the next thing I remember is slow, gentle caresses over my face, neck, chest, shoulder, then back up to my face to repeat the circuit. Her lips pressed to my hairline at intervals. My eyelashes brushed her neck while I tried to blink the cobwebs away.
âYou with me, sweetheart?â
Nope. Not even close. I donât even know what planet Iâm on right now.
She smoothed my sweaty hair back off my face. Planted another kiss to my temple. âThatâs okay. Youâre safe. Take your time.â
This is going too well, right? Sheâs too perfect. Godâs a sadist; that other shoe is going to return from orbit, and because I am willing to give my whole being to this woman, it will kill me. This love will kill me.
#cb journal#bearblrpromptober#carmen berzatto#carmy berzatto#carmen berzatto fanfiction#the bear fanfiction#carmy berzatto fanfiction#carmy x reader#carmy smut#carmen berzatto smut#carmy berzatto smut#this man is so feral
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late to the party but Meleanor was so right... Malleus IS a bright star for Briar Valley đđâš
I really love how this groovy was composed visually. It really highlights the difference of Diasomnia members in comparison to Malleus. About their strength and status initially
but In a way, this makes me feel like it also highlights their difference in lifespan.
Malleus at the brightest because he still has far too many candles to burn, he is the one with the most highlights and saturation to bring focus but also since he's so bright, it dwindles other people's "shine", symbolizing his power and magnificence as an enabler to his loneliness and separation from others. He's like a Like a sun in a way... Too bright so its better not to get close, thats why its so poignant for me that his highlights are yellow (even though I know they just chose that bcs it complements green lol)
Sebek and Silver have some highlights, signifying they're young and obviously have many years to live by in human standards.
But what really caught my attention was how "dull" Lilia's color pallette here... Even Sebek and Silver's eyes look more saturated but Lilia is just outright "dull" even though we know his red eyes are really striking... It makes me think of his "eventual end" (am back in the Farewell Lilia laments lol)
How his colors here isnt as saturated and bright like Silver, Sebek, and Malleus bcs unlike them, he has too few of candles to burn now, the only highlights we see here are on the corners of his cape or "the last part of his character design".
I also really like how Sebek, Silver, and Lilia are placed behind Malleus, I assumed they were in front of Malleus based on the visuals of their dorm card lineup but here they're positioned behind Malleus to interpret they're guarding him in the shadows, but also it makes me think that they're positioned like that bcs Malleus obviously has a longer way to go than them but their past ("shadows") are still in Malleus' life and how Malleus can look behind in his past and recall their memories if it ever gets lonely living forward "seperated" from the the other Diaso members.
There is a contrast between green lights and violet lights on the floor, and only Sebek, Silver, and Malleus are standing in the green light.
In the color wheel, violet/purple and green are contrasting colors. If you grayscale these colors, You'll see that violet/purple will look darker than green (grayscale-wise). It makes me tear up interpreting that only Lilia is placed on the purple side of the area because he's the character here who's "life is dimming to darkness".
Even so, despite the differences in their status lifespan personality etc, they look so complete and look good together... đâš And Malleus has an evil expression here too but it has an undertone that he's just happy... There's no undertone of intimidation unlike in pre-groovy, (and also because his face is so round (that happens bcs the perspective is high lol) that he looks softer, XD #chubby cheeks Malleus back at it again lol) and Malleus actually "looks kind" bcs he's with his family lol
#twst#twisted wonderland#twistedwonderland#disney twisted wonderland#malleus draconia#disney twst#lian notes#twst malleus#lilia vanrouge#twst silver#sebek zigvolt#twst sebek zigvolt#silver vanrouge#twst lilia vanrouge#twst lilia#twst sebek#diasomnia#twst card#twst tsum#twst tsum tsum#twst jp#twisted tsumderland#tsumsted wonderland#twst diasomnia#twst analysis#hashtag overanalysing about colorz lol
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Hi, I really like ur page and i was wondering if i could request a beach day with dad gojo?? I think this would be wholesomeđđ
â· ÍÍÍÍâłâ„minors / ageless / blank blogs dni
ℜ notes: some tooth rotting fluff for you nonnie! cw children; reader and gojo are parents of two; alternate au where things are only happy; satoru is a retired sorcerer; I mention that satoru's hair is a bit long but that's because I actually hc him growing it out slightly after retiring - requests for dad gojo prompts are still open.
love consumes your daily life. it comes in the form of good morning kisses, in messy rooms, in vibrant chatter that never seems to end, in tears, in a stack of dirty dishes, in folding clothes for a family of four. it manifests itself in various ways - and no matter where the pendulum swings between how good or bad it can feel, you go to sleep every night eternally grateful.
today's sky is clear and vibrant, saturated in a blue that mirrors the expanding horizon. waves crash along the shore, the subtle breeze whipping back and forth.
a morning at the beach was just what you needed. a nice break away from the demands of your day to day life. the heat teasingly kisses your exposed skin, despite you being hidden under the giant umbrella.
you inhale with gratitude, breathing the salt in the air.
by your side is your daughter, whose now a year and half. her white hair is pulled into two pigtails, her cheeks a rosy pink. she's sitting upright, her big eyes focusing on her toy tools as she shovels the grains of sand by your side.
you mindlessly lean forward to kiss the top of her head, pushing your sunglasses away from your face to glance toward the horizon.
your heart flutters at the sight of your husband whose tall, muscular body stands firm like a marble statue in the distance. your son is on his shoulders, his hands lightly gripping his father's hair, as satoru trails a path back and forth along the sea bed.
no one would be able to tell that your son is actually quite tall for his age, not when he looks so small next to his father.
your daughter noises out "dada" as she follows your gaze, pointing her shovel towards them and flicking tiny granulates of sand up ahead.
once upon a time your life wasn't quite like this, so you absorb the seconds like a sponge.
you spend some time building sand castles with your daughter, who rejects the concept of dimensional shapes and prefers the art of rustic mounds instead. you're both so engrossed in your little activity, that you barely hear satoru and your son walk towards you.
"mama!" your son squeals, his hands clutched tight into two fists as he nearly kicks the mound that you've both been carefully crafting together.
"easy, my love!" you giggle, glancing up at him with affection.
he looks so much like satoru, you think. his eyes may be yours, but satoru's genes fought hard for that claim with a streak of blue piercing through his left iris. he has the same cute little nose, and a massive grin that brightens up his whole face.
the only stark difference is with his hair color, which was simply a lighter shade of yours.
"m'sorry!" he politely replies, adjusting his position as you circle one arm around him. "I gotta show you!" he opens both fists, where he holds two beautiful shells. "one's for you, mama. and the other is for akemi!"
"oh, these are beautiful, jun!" you coo, taking each shell from his hand. you already know exactly where you'll keep them, one sitting on your vanity and the other you'll attach onto the decorative mobile in akemi's room.
you place both shells carefully into the beach bag and pick up jun's thermos. he plops down right beside you and happily takes it from your hand.
meanwhile, satoru finds his place on the towel, his long arms scooping up akemi into the contours of chest.
you run your fingers through jun's wet hair, pushing it away from his face as you watch him drink water. akemi babbles by your side while satoru continues whispering the sweetest words into her ear.
"how's my pretty girl? you having fun making sand castles with mama?" he coos, rubbing the tip of his red rose against hers. their blushed faces mirroring one another.
akemi giggles and kisses her father in return.
"we should be heading back soon," you state, not wanting to be the bearer of bad news but knowing full well that the afternoon heat will be far too much for young daughter.
satoru and jun both turn to look at you, tiny pouts forming on their mouths as their shoulders slump.
"do we have'ta, mama?" jun mumbles.
"yes, but how about we get some ice cream first before we go?"
"oh! I could do with some ice cream!" satoru replies, too busy making a silly face at akemi to pull another laugh out of her.
jun moves closer to them, practically crawling on his father's lap as he raises the thermos victoriously like he won an epic battle.
"I want ice cream too!"
satoru gathers him in his arms as well, placing him on his lap to cradle his two babies together.
another burst of love runs through you, one that settles deep within your soul.
you allow father, son and daughter to bond while you carefully pack up all your things. by the time satoru puts them down, you're almost finished.
you stand up to stretch your legs, your husband following your footsteps and slipping his arms around your waist to spin you in his direction while jun and akemi take a second to destroy the sand castle that you were building earlier.
"hey, hot stuff," he teases under his breath, greeting you like it's the first time he's seen you all day. "missed you out in the water"
"nu-uh, mister," you playfully scold, "your smooth talking isn't going to excuse you from the near heart attack you gave me when you dunked jun in earlier..."
satoru arches forward to kiss your cheek, "lighten up, mama. you know our babies are in perfectly safe hands with me,"
you shake your head, a musing smile making your cheeks feel tight. you bring one hand up to twirl a strand of satoru's hair, while the pads of your other fingers lightly grazes over the blades of his undercut.
you scratch the back of his head lovingly, "I know they are"
two arms wrap around your leg, and you look down to find jun resting his chin on your thigh while looking up at you with curiosity. "mama, can we get the ice cream now?"
you shift your gaze to satoru, the tiny moment of privacy fleeting as love makes it's presence known once again.
"you guys head over to the shop, while I pack up the stuff. I'll meet you there."
with that, you carry akemi in your arms while you hold jun's hand. the three of you stroll away from your space of sanctuary towards the ice cream shop.
you greet the owner, his familiar face clocking your own. the last time you saw him was on your honeymoon with satoru. the man's face beams with pride as he looks at your children, witnessing how much has bloomed around you since.
you order everyone's ice cream, and he graciously offered akemi's tiny scoop free of charge.
you're seated at the booth, watching jun devour his chocolate soft serve while akemi's lips turn orange nibbling at her peach sorbet. satoru finally walks in, clad in a unbuttoned short sleeve shirt that he wears over his swim trunks. he runs his fingers through his hair, pushing the longer layers back and away from his face to reveal his handsome features.
"papa, hurry up! you're ice cream will melt!" jun calls out, and you kindly shush him as to not disturb the other customers.
thankfully, it was a young couple and two older women who simply laugh at the interaction.
satoru slips into the booth right next you, his arm automatically curling around your waist while his free hand lifts the cone that you've been holding for him.
he dramatically licks around the swirl of vanilla, making jun and akemi laugh with his animated reaction.
you both find one another then, the root of your love at the forefront.
suddenly, everything else disappears, and it's just the four of you suspended in time. satoru leans down to steal a kiss, his sugary lips slightly cold, and you return the gesture tenderly.
"ewwwwww" jun interrupts, scrunching his nose in disgust.
the spark fizzles, but that's alright. you know full well that you and your husband have the night to make up for it.
satoru looks at his son with cheeky astonishment. "eww?! really, jun? how do you think you got here in the first place?"
you playfully slap your husband's chest, while your son shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly with his innocence brushing over satoru's comment.
"dunno, ask mama"
satoru's jaw goes slack, a disapproving expression overcoming him. "ask mama? as if your papa had nothing to do with it, huh?"
"well, I came from her tummy not yours" your son answers quite matter of factly, giving your husband a sassy look as if he knows better.
you bring your fingers to your mouth to stop yourself from laughing at his wild comment and rest your cheek against satoru's shoulders, listening to father and son banter while the exhaustion from the day trickles in slowly.
you close your eyes for only a moment when the silence settles in.
satoru leans you both back against the plush surface of the sofa.
"tired, angel?"
"mhmm," you agree, "but today was perfect."
he smiles, his cerulean eyes shifting to jun and akemi finishing up their treats.
you're not the only one who finds themselves thankful.
"yeah," he murmurs, squeezing your waist in confirmation, "yeah, it really was."
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