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kass-storycorner · 3 years

Note

Hello!! i stumbled across your works and i absolutely fell inlove with your writing (especially the angsty ones)

Can i jump on the angst train and request a fic with a line that goes "I'm here, you dont have to wait anymore," with childe? Like maybe the reader told childe that theyll wait for him no matter how long it takes (and maybe a sprinkle of argument) but something happened that made the reader be on the brink of death. With or without comfort/happy ending is up to u!!

first of all thank you so much for the request! and it really makes me so happy to hear that you like my writing, especially my angst haha secondly I am so sorry that this took so long, since I saw this ask in my inbox I couldn't stop thinking about it and finished the first part of this pretty quickly - only to be stuck at how to end it (and actually fulfill the request haha). right now i am not really happy with the ending, though I feel like this is the best I can currently do! I really hope you enjoy, please let me know if it was alright haha (also I fear that I didn't really...wrote Childe in-character, I don't know)

Waiting for you

Genre: Angst, Hurt, comfort at the end

Characters: Childe x gn!reader (Childe is referred by is actual name by the reader, but outside of dialog he's called Childe)

Format: bullet points (backstory) + Text (actual fic, answer to the prompt)

Word count: 4324

Content warning: veeeery slight spoiler warning for the Liyue quests, its literally just one sentence and I tried to keep it as ambigious as possible, slight cursing (using the word bitch too, though thats the only instance of using gendered-vocab for the reader, i still wrote them gn!), mention of blood, mild violence, not proof-read ahah when will i ever do that

you can find the fic under the cut, have fun reading!

You and Childe knew each other since you were just little kids – him and his family being neighbours had meant you always ended up playing with him and his siblings, though you both got along the best.

On more than one occasion you both just ran off to somewhere no one could disturb you, your secret hideout, trading stories of great warriors from outside of Snezhnaya you heard the fishermen at the docks talk about.

Most people and children were wary of Childe, he was always the one who wanted to ‘play-fight’, which ended most of the time with the other kid running home, crying. However, you were the exception, always able to beat him or at least have a tie. Your parents, especially your father, hated it when you came back home with bruises on your arm, a bright smile and telling how you beat Childe up that day. He never felt like Childe was someone you should surround yourself with, but he kept quite for your younger years, also thanks to your mother who wasn’t fond of the fighting either but saw how much time with Childe meant to you.

Things however changed after Childe fell into the Abyss.

It was apparent how violent he got after it, even his own family was completely helpless when it came to him. So his father send him off to join the Fatui, which was a very controversial decision in the small town you both called home – most were happy to not have Childe be around anymore, for he picked up more and more fights and became more violent, but even within Snezhnaya the Fatui have a bad reputation, so most people were convinced that he would only become even worse.

Your father was one of those who was happy, but also concerned. Your mother died shortly after Childe fell into the Abyss, so your father forbade you any contact with Childe.

This, however, did not work. After Childe had to leave Morespesok you kept in touch through letters and whenever he was in town you always met up in secret.

The letters you send each other turned sweeter the older you got, changing the feelings for friendship you both felt for each other slowly into a romantic love. Childe always ended his letter with saying that he would return soon and you always with “I’ll be waiting for you Ajax”.

You always looked forward to his letters and so did he for yours. When he came back to Morespesok after every mission he had to do for the Fatui you both would meet up in your secret hideout. This place became your save haven. Conversations, hugs, kisses and even more – everything that wasn’t written in a letter between you two happened there.

Childe was fine with this and so were you. He didn’t want people to know there was someone he loved as much as he loved you, as one of the Harbringers of the Fatui it could endanger you. You on the other hand were fine with it because, even though you had no understanding for why your father forbad you the relationship with Childe, you couldn’t stomach to disappoint him. After all he was your father and you loved him dearly, no matter how much you both might disagree on things.

Still, you longed for something more – with Childe and for your own life. You wanted to travel too; you haven’t had the chance to leave Morespesok past the few neighbouring villages. So, when Childe wrote to you that after his next visit, which would only be a few days long, he was going to Liyue and didn’t knew for how long he had to stay there – you asked him in your reply if you could join him. Him writing that it wasn’t possible and better for you to stay in Morespesok and just wait for him hurt, but you understood. You are fine with waiting for him, you always were.

You were expecting a sad but loving last night with Childe before he had to leave, ending with a bittersweet goodbye. You weren’t expecting what happened instead.

Childe was angry, it was clear to see. The moment he stepped into your secret hideout you knew something was off – how he averted your eyes, how he didn’t return your kiss with a passionate one, like usual. “Ajax”, you purred in a sweet voice, “what’s wrong?”. You tried to take his hand, but he only pulled it away. Ah, that was unusual. He never refused your touch, no matter how angry he was before. “There is nothing wrong, I just was curious if there is something you want to tell me?”, he replied in a bitter tone, not even looking at you. It took you completely off guard; you saw him be angry or sulky before, you two had your fair share of arguments in the past, but somehow this was different. “No, there is nothing except for the fact that I missed you very much,” you told him, but you could feel how you started to become irritated. When you saw him two days ago visiting your family’s shop with Teucer he gave you a warm and loving smile, winking at you when he handed you that piece of paper asking to meet up tonight. What had happened in between that made him act like this? “Tsk, fine,” and with that he was on his way out. You moved quickly in front of him, blocking the way out. “Now wait a moment, would you kindly tell me what is going on here?”. He just quietly looked at you for a few seconds before he shoved you aside. “AJAX!”, you couldn’t hide your irritation and growing anger anymore, burying your fingers in his arm in order to stop him from leaving. “What did I do to make you be angry at me?”. “It doesn’t matter”, Childe replied coldly, while trying to get you to loosen your grip on his arm. “Now let me go and run home to your father and your fiancé, I bet they are already asking where you are right now.” “My what?” you replied with bewilderment. “Childe, is that why you are angry with me? Because you think I am engaged to someone else?”. Honestly, you would find this situation hilarious if it weren’t for the fact that Childe still looked at you with a sour face. “Well, I don’t think you are engaged to someone else; I know you are. Your father was really excited about the whole thing when he told me, he even invited me to your wedding, granted if I could find the time.” As he said this, he noticed how your face was a combination of confusion and anger. And oh yes, were you angry. Angry at your father for telling such blatant lies and at Childe for believing them, confused as to why he would even believe your father in the first place. “Ajax, I-“you let go of his arm, pinching the bridge of your nose and letting out a deep sigh. “I am engaged to no one, never was. I didn’t tell you this, because I didn’t want to upset you or worry you needlessly, but maybe I should’ve done it. My father continuously tries to marry me off whenever he finds anyone, he deems a worthy suitor. I guess he might have found one of your letters, though he never said anything about it, but I can’t explain why he suddenly started to become so interested in my marital status. Every few weeks he brings another person home, tells me I should marry them, for me to turn those poor fools down and tell my father he should stop. Most accept it that I have no interest in them, some stick around for a few weeks until the realise that nothing will come of it, but yeah. Ask anyone, Archons ask your family, it’s already a running joke here.” You expected the atmosphere to become less tense after you explained the whole situation to him, for him to even turn it into a joke and to apologise for his behaviour. Instead, it just grew more tense. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”, his voice still being cold, underneath it you could hear how angry he still was. “Because it wasn’t important, at least not to me. Honestly Ajax, I don’t see what the issue is here. I am not engaged and I do not plan to agree to one unless-“, you stopped yourself right there. ‘Unless it’s you who’s asking’, is what you wanted to say. You could feel how your heart fluttered even just at the thought. Childe, however, did not notice where you were going with your last sentence, too

occupied with his own anger. “Unless what?”. “It doesn’t matter, can’t we just drop the topic and enjoy our first and last night in months with each other without fighting?”, this was your last offer of peace, hoping he would finally calm down. But you knew deep down – Childe never was one to back out of a fight. “No no no, continue, tell me what you wanted to say!”, his voice growing louder and louder with every word. “Ajax, let it be,” you really weren’t in the mood for anything tonight anymore and the least you wanted to do was discuss your wish of a future with him. “No, I won’t. Tell me, because I would love to know. Or don’t, you can also just go and choose one of the various suitors your father picked out for you to fuck, I bet you really enjoy it how they are all standing in line for you,” he spit his words out, full of anger and disgust. This was the final straw for you, it was apparent that Childe choose words that he knew would hurt you with intent and it made you explode. “You know what? I’ve had enough!”, you screamed at him, feeling how tears were pooling in the corner of your eyes. Not out of sadness or because his words hurt, those were tears of pure rage. “You come in here, after I haven’t seen you in weeks, before you leave for an unspecified amount of time and all you have to do is pick a fight? Fine, here have a fight! You are unhappy that I didn’t tell you how my father wants to force me in a marriage I don’t want to be in? Boho, I am so so sorry for you Ajax. Really, I can’t fathom to imagine how much you must struggle with this, but oh well, life must be so hard when you keep travelling around Teyvat. Because I really can’t imagine how life would be outside this place, what it’s like to have anything to do. Have you ever noticed, ever realised how much I hate it? Hate the wating? Because that’s all I do! I wait for your letters, and I wait for you to return. All I ever do I wait, wait, wait. Wait for you to come home yes and wait for you to finally be ready for something, anything more!”, the tears were now streaming down your hot, angry face. Childe just looked at you, waiting for you to end what you had to say. “I am tired of waiting! I am tired of keeping us hidden, yes, I agreed to it too in the beginning, but now? Dammit, Ajax. I don’t want to be left alone here when you go to Liyue, I don’t want to wait if I don’t know for how long I should wait. I just- “it became harder for you to speak, sobs interrupting you every few seconds. “I wish you would let me join you.” Except for your sobs, which you tried to supress, silence fell over the two of you. Childe just stood there in front of you, watching how you tried to stop the tears. “You know I can’t take you with me. It’s… it’s not safe,” he said after a while. You didn’t expect for him to change his mind, however his words didn’t make you feel any better… on the contrary they made you feel even feel worse. “Leave me alone,” was all you could tell him in that moment. You didn’t want to have him near you, you didn’t want to see his stupid face or look at his sad, blue eyes. Right now, you only wanted to be alone. “(Y/N)”, Childe began softly, wanting to take you in his arms but the look you gave him made him stop dead in his tracks. “Please, I need to be alone now”. The atmosphere was heavy, both of you didn’t want to part on bad terms but – right now wasn’t the right moment to make up. “I will leave you alone, but (Y/N)”, he said, looking at you with regret about how he acted just earlier, “please wait for me.” You scoffed at his words. Wait for him, again. “(Y/N)”, you turned away, so you didn’t have to see his face when he spoke your name again. “(Y/N), please. Please promise me that you will wait for me, I’ll come back, I promise you and I will make up for this… and for making you always wait for me. I promise. You make a pinkie promise, you keep it all your life. You break a pinkie promise, I throw you on the ice.” At the mention of the nursery rhyme you had to chuckle a bit. “The cold will kill the pinkie that once betrayed your friend,

the frost will freeze your tongue off, so you never lie again,” you finished it, looking back at him. “Fine, I’ll wait. But leave now.” And with that Childe left you alone, leaving Morespesok for Liyue the next day.

It has been a few months now since Childe came to Liyue and while his endeavours here were more or less successful, what was on his mind most of the days was you and how you both parted. He wanted to kick himself in the arse for how he acted that day, for making you so angry and for making you cry. The worst however is how you haven’t written him a single letter yet and Childe, though he would never admit it because of his pride, was too scared to send you one first. That he should be the first one to send you a letter was something he was aware of but still – he couldn’t find the right words. What should he write? Every time he sat down at his desk, looking at the piece of paper in front of him… he was never able to make it past “Dear (Y/N)”, and even with this he wasn’t sure, maybe “Beloved” would sound better? Childe would’ve even considered asking Zhongli for advice, however after finding out that Childe was just a pawn in his plans – he still considers Zhongli a friend, but before he could ask for advice the feeling of betrayal needs to fade out. And now he got the order to return to Snezhnaya by the end of the next month… he felt so anxious at the thought of seeing you again, not even knowing what happened with you the past months. So in the letter to his family in which he announced is return, Childe asked them, after months of not hearing anything from or about you, how you were. When he held the letter of his family in his hands, he started to feel nervous, it included the answer of your wellbeing. He knew you would keep your promise, but still. What if when not? Reading the contents of the letter, however, made him wish that he had asked sooner. Childe couldn’t stop reading the few lines his family wrote about you over and over again.

You asked about (Y/N) wellbeing in your last letter. Ajax, we wish we could tell you some more pleasant news than this, but we haven't seen or heard anything of (Y/N) for a week now. No one really knows where they might be, the last we know is that they left their home after a fight with their father, but there is nothing more we can tell you.

After reading those few lines, the letter already crumply at the edges from the way he held onto it, Childe decided to immediately make his way back home. In his opinion it didn't matter if he returned sooner than ordered and that was a problem he will face later. For now, he wanted to know what had happened to you, because he couldn't, didn’t want to, believe that you left Morepesok... you promised that you would wait for him. But doubt crept into his heart and his mind - you were so frustrated with waiting, he noticed it before you even said anything that night. However, he kept ignoring it. It wasn't like that Childe didn't also wish for more, to build a home with you, to spend more time with you. The feeling of not being good enough for you, something your father and others in Morepesok made clear to him since your childhood together, and the fear of putting a visible target on your back by being by your side... all of it held him back.

The way back home only took him a few days and when he came close to his village, seeing the once so well-known roofs and chimney of the houses, he took a junction into the woods, making his way to the secret hideout of you two. When he arrived, he noticed how it looked lived in, at first a relive for Childe, until he saw the traces of a fight - and blood on the floor. He was quick to follow the trail of blood, the father he went away from the hideout the more blood was on the ground. Suddenly he could hear a strangers voice in the distance.

"Answer me you stupid bitch!", you felt a hand pulling you up by your hair, but you were already too tired, too beaten up and injured to even respond to that violent pull. All you tried to do was to keep your hands on your stomach, trying to stop the blood from gushing out. You could barely remember what had happened, how you got there. It all started over a week ago, when you father came with another suitor wanting to marry you. Like always you turned him down, saying you had no interest in marriage, this time however he wasn't as understand as the others were. The whole thing ended in you having a huge fight with your father about it, he tried to pressure you even more than usual to take that fella as your husband. It made you sick, you just couldn't stomach being around him anymore. You always wanted to make him happy, always feared of disappointing him. But this? Him asking you to marry a random person? It was something you just couldn't do. So you went away, ran out to the little hideout planning to stay there until Childe came back. You wanted to wait for him - you even got over your stupid pride and sent away a letter for him earlier this morning... and maybe this was your mistake. Carefully you tried not to be noticed by the people in your village, you didn’t want anyone to worry about you, however you also didn’t want to explain your disappearance for the last few days. The man who your father tried you to accept as a fiancé however seemed to have spotted you when you left the post-office. It was already too late when you realised that you were followed - the man made his way into the place that was only meant for you and Childe. After that your memory started to get blurry, how was that even possible it just had happened. He attacked you, you fought back, though the man was just stronger... you ran away, feeling the blood already coming from your stomach. Your body started to become weaker, your legs grew heavier and slower until you fell. Now he was above you, grabbing your hair and screaming. It was hard to even focus on what that man said to you, too tired grew your body and mind. 'I have to stay awake', you thought. It was clear that if you lost consciousness now... well, who knows what would happen then, you only knew it wouldn't be good. You had to wait for Childe, you had to be there when he got home.

There were more than a few things in Childes live he wished he never had to see. Seeing your limp body, blood streaming out of your stomach which you could barley cover with your hand, your hair in the hands of some stranger and your eyes struggling to stay open – yes, Childe wished this was something reserved for his nightmares, not for the reality he had to face now. It didn’t even take second for him to react at that sight, swiftly being next to that man and cutting his hand off with one of his blades, kicking the rest of him away. Childe would have loved to take his time with that man, torture him, make him regret that he was born, but what was more important was to stop your bleeding. Quickly Childe sat down next to you on the ground, using his scarf to stop the bleeding. “Ajax,” he could hear you whisper quietly. “Hey, I’m here, everything is fine, everything is going to be okay.” You desperately tried to keep your eyes open, to look at him. He was a mess, his eyes filled with fear and panic spread across his face. Never had you seen him with such an expression. For only what felt a few seconds you closed your eyes and then – “Hey, (Y/N) hey, open your eyes, talk to me”, you opened them and realised that you were in Childes arms now, his eyes switching from you to what was apparently the way to Morepesok. “Ajax…”, it was so cold. When did it became so cold again? “I waited for you and now you’re here… I waited. Kept my promise.” The last few words came out slurred. “Yes, I'm here, you don’t have to wait anymore. I promise you don’t have to wait for me ever again, just please-“ his breathing was heavy, he ran as fast as he could to the village in the hopes that the healers there could help you, that there was anyone who was able to help you now. “Please, don’t close your eyes, okay?” Before you could even answer him that you will try to keep them open you could already feel yourself slip out of conscious again. All you could say before everything went dark was his name again. “Ajax…”

The first thing you noticed was a warm hand on yours. Even before you opened your eyes you knew which hand it was. “Ajax,” you were a bit shocked at the sound of your own voice. It sounded so weak. You opened your eyes, seeing into those deep blue eyes looking at you. “(Y/N)”, he didn’t sound any better. Only now you started to notice the dark circles under his eyes and how his hair looked even messier than usual. Was he by your side the whole time? “How are you feeling?”. “Better than you apparently”, you joked, weakly grinning at him. He smiled back, rubbing the backside of your hand with his thumb. “I’m glad you’re better,” he replied quietly, looking down at the hand he was holding. “I’m glad you’re here.” At that his smile faded, turning into a sad expression and you already knew what this meant. “Don’t tell me…” “I’m sorry, I wasn’t even supposed to be here just yet and my early departure from Liyue apparently has caused some issues and… well, I was able to stay here until you woke up. The deal was when you wake up or-, well that doesn’t matter now. The deal was that I had to go back and fix the damage I caused once you wake up, which is honestly way more generous than I had anticipated.” You didn’t really understand what he was exactly talking about, you were still tired, but all you knew was that he had to go again. There wasn’t any energy left in your body to hold back the tears that were now falling down your face. Childe cupped your face in his hands, wiping away your tears with his thumb. “Hey, listen,” he said softly. “I promise you won’t have to wait for too long, when you recovered, I will send for you.” At this your ears peaked, looking at Childe with hopeful eyes. “Send for me, you mean-?”. “Yes, this time around I’ll be the one waiting for you to arrive in Liyue and not you’re waiting for me to come home.” At that you threw your arms around his neck wanting to hug him, causing you to hiss in pain. You forgot that you still had a stomach wound. “Careful now”, he laughed a bit at how enthusiastic you were about the news that you forgot your injury. “You promise that I will really join you in Liyue?”, you still couldn’t fully believe that he really was fine with it. “You make a pinkie promise, you keep it all your life. You break a pinkie promise, I throw you on the ice,” you leaned back and held your pinkie up in the air. Childe smiled at you softly, interlocking his pinkie with yours. “The cold will kill the pinkie that once betrayed your friend, the frost will freeze your tongue off, so you never lie again.”

#genshin x reader #tartaglia x reader #childe x reader #ajax x reader #gn!reader #reader fic #genshin impact #genshin fic #fan fiction #angst #angst prompt #bit of comfort #hurt #hurt prompt #writing

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iwishtobeastorm · 3 years

Note

Congrats on 200!!! Can I p’ease have “on my lap. Now.” with Din 💕

A/N: Thank you so so so much for requesting, Padi! It means so much to me. I hope this won't disappoint!

Feathers - Din Djarin/Reader

Warnings: mentions of death, meantions of someone trying to hurt reader, fluff, innocent reader

Words count: 1500+

Celebration | Masterlist

Din didn't want it to go like that. It was supposed to be an easy job. The bounty was some wealthy kid, running away from his parents, who wanted him back and hired Din. He didn't want to take you with him, but you begged for it so sweetly he eventually subdued and that was a mistake. He should've known you'll be a distraction, he should've known his feeling for you will get in a way. You two waited for him to appear at one of those shady bars, which made Din uncomfortable since the first moment you two stepped in. All the people were gazing at you as if you were a peace of meat. He wanted to turn around and lead you back to the ship, but you gave him one of your little smiles, assuring him everything is okay, and it gave him comfort, at least for a while. Until he went after the kid into the back of the bar, leaving you on your own. He almost had the boy, when the scream echoed through the whole building, and Din knew it was you. He let the kid run away, storming back into the bar, his heart thrumming wildly in his chest. What he was met with when he entered, made him see red. This huge man was dragging you out of the bar, kicking and steaming, the Baby crying in your arms from distress. Din moved before he knew it.

"Let her go," he uttered through clenched teeth, pointing one of his blasters to the temple of the man's giant head. "Or what, tinman? I can take you down anytime," he chuckled, yanking you closer to him, making you fight against his hold again, but it was hard when you had to hold the Child too. "I said, let her go. This is your only warning," Din felt his blood boiling at the sight of your teary eyes, opened wildly in fear, while the baby clutched to you, hiding from the man, who dared to put his dirty hand on his clan. That's not something he could get away with alive. And he didn't. Din gave you a nod, which you understood, pressing the baby closer and closing your eyes. What happened next played through your head for hours. The sound of blaster shooting, a choked grunt and heavy thud, as the man collapsed to the ground, his big hand finally releasing you. You opened your eyes again, just to find Din, rushing into his arms, hiding your face underneath his chin. He pulled you close tightly, stroking your back, while whispering softly to you to comfort you, his eyes scanning the room, sending a clear message to anyone who was inside, staring at the three of you with unhidden surprise. Do not mess with Mando's clan. You've been unusually quiet on your way back to Razor Crest, darting behind him with the baby, who was already back to his coos and babbling, waving his arms and tugging on your hair. Din wanted to do something to make you feel better, but he was always so lost when it came to offering you comfort or any sign of affection in general. You were the one good in that. You always knew what to say and what to do. Not him. So he stayed quiet and when the hatch closed behind you, he hid in the cockpit like a coward. He was desperate. He wanted to do something, pull your close and assure you that he'll never let anything like that happen to you again, that he'll always protect you, but he knows he won't be able to get the words past his throat. Every time he's in your presence, he somehow loses his ability to speak. You enchanted him ever since he first met you, hiring you as the baby's caretaker. You are everything he isn't. Sweet, gentle, bright and innocent. You bring so much light into his life by just simply existing by his side. Your laughter warms his heart every time he hears it, the songs you hum get stuck in his head until he's humming them under his breath too, your touches burning at his skin for hours, driving him crazy. But you're not his. He would love it, Gods know he would. Just the thought of it makes him delirious. But there's no way a girl like you could ever want him. Or at least he persuaded himself that's true a long time ago. Maybe that's why he ignored all those glances you give him, all those wannabe brief touches, all your need to be close to him and please him. You don't have

enough courage to confess your feelings for him and definitely not when you think you know he doesn't feel the same. You would lose everything if you did, you're sure about that. Din and the baby are the best things that ever happened to you, there's no way you'll let yourself ruin it.

You two avoid each other for a few hours, until you calm yourself down enough to face him again, climbing up the ladder to the cockpit, your nervousness and anxiety growing, making your chest feel too tight, while your heartbeat thunders in your ears. You slowly step closer, until you stop a few feet away from his seat. He's casually sitting there, facing the white tunnel of hyperspace, pushing some buttons on the control panel. You bite on your lower lip, clasping your hands in front of you and squeezing tightly to control your nerves. "Uhm- Din?" You murmur, trying to get his attention, which works immediately as he turns in his seat towards you, his dark visor meeting your gaze. "What is it, mesh'la?" He can't help but worry. Your expression is full of anguish and turmoil, which squeezes on his heart with need to comfort you. "I- I came to apologize. I should never go on the hunt with you, I'm sorry the bounty escaped because of me. And- I- I apologize for all the troubles I bring your way. I-I-," you take in a shaky breath, trying to hold back your tears, head tilting down to hide your flushed cheek, embarrassment coursing through you. "It was stupid to think I could ever handle it. I just- I wanted to be by your side. I- I get lonely here on the ship with the baby while you're away, you know? And I thought that- you said it'll be an easy bounty so I thought I could just be there with you and watch but I- I ruined it all for you. I'm so sorry," you whisper, hot streams rolling down you pretty cheeks and Din could scream. This is not what he wanted. He didn't mean to make you feel bad about his own mistake. You were attacked by some di'kut and now you're apologizing for things that are not your fault at all. How could he ever let it get this far? "On my lap. Now," he mutters and you tense, not sure if you've heard it right. "What?" You murmur, wiping away your tears. "Come here, cyar'ika," Din says, patting his knee. Your nervousness could match his anytime as you approach him. You look up at him for confirmation, when you stand right in front of him and once he gives you a gentle nod, you straddle his lap, resting your hands on his shoulders. You gaze at him through the visor of his helmet, your eyes meeting his as always. He puts his hands on your waist, pulling you closer, the blush on your cheeks mirroring the one Din hides underneath the helmet. "You did nothing wrong, ad'ika. I'm sorry I left you there alone, I should've known it was a dangerous place for you. But please, don't blame yourself," he states, cupping your cheek, making you lean into his touch as you close your eyes. "So you're not mad at me?" You assure, voice little, making Din's hand squeeze tighter on your waist. "I could never be mad at you, mesh'la," he states, making you smile, as you wrap your hand around his wrist, planting a kiss to his gloved palm. It makes Din's heart do a little jump, the print of your lips setting his body on fire. You open your pretty eyes, looking at him, before you let go of his wrist and your hands find his shoulders again, pulling yourself flush to him, your forehead meeting his helmet, making Din hold back a gasp. "Thank you for saving me today. I don't know what I would do without you," you whisper, closing your eyes and biting on your lower lip, your heart racing in your chest. "I will never let anyone hurt you again, cyar'ika, I promise," he says, his baritone rumbling through your body, making your insides tingle. "Okay," you murmur with a smile, making Din smile softly too. You both yearned to be like this for months, dancing around each other like two feathers in the air, until you finally collided, ending up in the safety of each other's arms. Neither you or Din could be happier, because even though you both want so much more, you know this is just a beginning of something amazing, something greater. So even though Din didn't want it to go like that, he won't complain about it now.

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tarotchariotpickyourcard · 3 years

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Pick a card reading: What you should like more about yourself!

This one is for the ones on that self love journey, the ones that need a pick me up or have a hard time with self confidence/esteem especially.

So I'm sure it's quite clear. The cards that you pick will reflect why you deserve to be more loving to yourself, what wonderful qualities you have, and maybe help convince you to lessen your negative inner language.

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Please pick one of the groups ( 1, 2, 3 or 4.)

You might be drawn to an item, the card itself, or a number. Please calm your mind and meditate for a minute.

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Side note: If you have a hard time choosing, or nothing seems strong to you, perhaps you could come back later on and try. Do not pressure yourself, darling.

Number one is the badge saying "yup"

Number 2 is the wing

Number 3 is the little bird

Number 4 is the chain saying "BE MINE"

GROUP 1 : (Yup badge)

Morning affirmations, Joy, Strength

6 of wands, 4 of pentacles, Mother of swords

What an interesting blend of character you are!

With the owl, this is a strong suggestion that you are able to see through deep into situations and understand "in between the lines". A great communicator, the queen of swords can be straight to the point, brilliant and not to be messed with. Your ability to say it like it is might be perceived as a little harsh to very sensitive or younger people, however it is a strong and much needed trait in the world. We need people with the organisational skills and know how of the mother of swords! The queen always reminds me of someone who is a good teacher, and a fair person.

With the 6 of wands and the 4 of pentacles, the combination hits in a way of potentially dulling that light. The traits I list may be some that you are aware of in a way, but perhaps have a lesser opinion of. The interesting mix of you is in the way of you being so strong, able to endure and be positive, yet a wonderful balance of being able to have boundaries. Again, I'm seeing the strong ability to recognise when someone is being a "rat" as the animal is right next to the owl. I can't help but get the idea that it is direct experience. I would be surprised if you haven't recently come to a revelation about a person in your social circle, or cut someone out/created more boundaries.

Strength mentions having resilience, coming through things more compassionate, stronger and brighter. Brighter being strong in focus to me, as it is next to joy. Your ability to have fun *despite* issues or obstacles is an enviable trait! I really feel that while you might have your difficulties, you never let them suck you in for too long mentally. You seem to try and stay positive through things, and not everyone can do that. You are also much more smart/knowledgeable than you give yourself credit for. Don't let anyone put you down, because you're being shown that if you go for what you've been studying/working at, with strong persistence you can succeed. I feel like the branches signify people who have acted as obstacles, or your troubles in life. This is confirmation you can rise above them, and if you're stuck right now, please accept my confirmation that things can and will change. Life can't help but flow, no matter how people may try and resist. So if anyone is putting you down, or getting in your way - know that their resistance to your future and well being is futile.

You keep having those boundaries. Keep on keeping on. You're sharp, you're witty, and of all things you have kept your kind heart. One day the joy you try to find in the little things will come to you effortlessly and in x100.

I got the need to call you cherub. Chin up, Cherub.

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GROUP 2 (the wing)

Wait, generosity, magic, peacefulness

The hermit, Ace of swords, Son of swords.

eYou're an extremely thoughtful person, aren't you? I get social activist vibes, the kind of person who thinks about bigger issues than just in their personal world, and could debate very well. The ability to get to the kernel of truth within an argument or bigger pattern in the world seems equal to none. If you have a hard time accepting that your opinions mean something, or you would be able to be persuasive, this is confirmation for you that actually - yes - you do have something meaningful to share with others.

In this pile I'm seeing a more peaceful, patient character. Someone who simply tries to be good, and do good for others. You create magic for other people. My heart swells at this, as I'm seeing reciprocity of kindnesses between you and others over time.

While The son of swords on it's own could potentially be quick to intervene or make a judgement, with the hermit and wait, I'm feeling more that you take the time to think things over. For example, if asked to make a decision, you would want to take your time and really think. If you were asked what your thoughts were on a political stand point, you would think in depth and make no judgements from the surface. This is so helpful, as there's less chance of misunderstanding/unkindness as well as the ability to make better long term decisions for yourself.

Very introspective, and the ace of swords suggests you have great clarity of mind. I can imagine you would be a wonderful person for explaining complicated matters to a wide group of people.

Generosity is what it says on the tin: You are a generous human. That is so, so important. There are many people out there who might feel like no one thinks about them or cares, and you come in and surprise them with something, or offer them help without them asking. It makes people feel valued, and like they are important or have a place in someone's life.

Peacefulness suggests not inviting drama, and I get 2 things. You might be described as grounded, or "chill". As well as this likely suggests your lack of interest in being within a dramatic situation. You are likely very good at looking at others drama, and seeing where it truly stems from, as well as having a good idea of advice for them. If you have friends right now, it's likely they feel peaceful being around you and that they can truly calm down or get your advice on their *own* drama.

You are so important to the people around you, and if there are people that can't appreciate you, I promise you they have *no* idea how lucky they are. You offer so much as a friend, confidant, and as a person who cares for the worlds well being. I appreciate you.

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GROUP 3: ( Little bird

Blessed change, gratitude, engagement, follow your heart, father of pentacles, the empress, the star

You're cool.

Right off the bat, I see your ability to see the silver lining, to take changes as they come (and I don't mean you happily drudge through hard changes, I mean more like you accept them more easily than others). Do you know, it really helps a persons resilience in life if they can have gratitude for things in general, as well as seeing the positive affects of life changes. You have an ability to notice the opportunities in said silver lining. An example I've read in the past involved a man who lost his job, but an opportunity came up for something he was passionate regarding his hobby. He would not have been free to do it unless he was let go of.

You're my free flowing group. Very adaptable. You're able to take time out to really think about what you truly desire in life. When themes like this come up, I really get the idea of authenticity. To put a focus on following your heart, being grateful for what you've taken part in and even quirky circumstances is a massive strength. Do you have any idea how scary that is to people? To wake up and think "My heart wants this, I'm going to actually aim for it because I need to be myself." That's terrifying to many!

Note: If you are finding it hard to be upfront or true to yourself due to fear, this is confirmation that you will be able to in the future. Take your time, as this will come naturally to you.

I know you might be shrugging thinking, but sometimes I get really negative or scared too. I won't say that's not a thing humans experience. What I am saying however, is that you have that strength of character to say actually, nothing would be worse than to answer to my fear. Fear of self expression, fear of being judged. Fear of not having your project liked. These kinds of things.

I feel like you're a fun person who is very interesting to people/has had at least one very interesting or unusual experience. I want you to know the cards are showing that people really enjoy speaking with you, and hearing your stories. So no negative self talk of being boring, or disliked.

Your flexibility, and your ability to be sociable, yet able to pull back appropriately is wonderful. The world needs those who can be more easy going as this can help people de-stress and stop thinking about their worries.

I'm seeing wonderful creativity, and again, being able to be social and talk to many people very well. You're a shining star, and you're supposed to be!

I wonder if sometimes you feel like you need to be "more" productive, but let me tell you... Networking with people is half the job.

I'm also wondering (as a rainbow stands out) if some here are part of the LGBTQIA+ community. It would make sense with the authenticity. If you have a social media presence, or a creative project you want to get out, or expressing your personal experiences to the world - this is confirmation to keep standing tall, stand proud because yes, you do have a lot to offer! King of pentacles next to the empress also suggests you might be on to something that can bring in some income for you. Again, even sharing your experiences is very valued and may well be it. The world itself wants to see you, or whatever you desire to create.

If you have a hard time focusing or being practical, darling, you get along well with others for a reason. Ask for help, whether it's family, friends online, a teacher, anyone. There's help to steer you further in the right direction. You're a beautiful person and you matter to people. You are loved, so please love yourself.

There's something here that seems upset, and I just have the biggest urge to hug you! So if you will, accept my many energetic and virtual hugs!

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GROUP 4: "Be mine"

Worthiness, Ups and downs, courage

Ace of pentacles, Ace of wands, daughter of wands (reversed)

Daughter of wands reversed suggests to me, that you have the traits such as this, but perhaps not the confidence in yourself right now about those things. The book describes her as passionate, visionary, cares more for career and starts a family later; stubborn, strong (i take this as physically actually) and may be going through a spiritual breakthrough or a big change. With this I get the thought that you probably don't recognise just *how* passionate you truly are. You might be finding it hard to go a certain way in your career and studies. There might even be some worries that you might not stick at it. But what you are not realising is your actions have magic in them.

If you are interested in LOA: Your actions manifest not only in a practical sense, but *that's* what truly gets the energy moving. You need physical expression of some kind.

I'm getting such practical, but passionate energy. The ace of wands with courage? That's amazing. Fire sign or not, you have classic fire energy. Even when you lack confidence, you have a strange inner ability to be brave even at your worst times.

Oh, if only you had the confidence to aim!

Your energy and action are seriously magnificent. You have a *lot* of inner energy, spiritual energy, physical vitality. If you have health issues this might sound strange to you - but I get the idea your body was built with a lot of vitality available. You might have really struggled in life with ups and downs here, but I'm seeing you crash right through all the barriers and try to do life the best way you know how. No matter your struggles, you are a warrior here.

The 2 aces here (that is so interesting to have seen) show that you are probably quite good at beginning new things, and when you're motivated, you're MOTIVATED. I'm getting the idea that when you *do* take action on a goal, you go at it with everything and it can surprise people.

I'm seeing creative ability. It's an ability that I have seen myself. An example would be.... A mistake is made in a piece of art. It didn't go the way you wanted originally. But, wait a minute... that's starting to look like something, so I'm going to change it all up and create something completely different than intended.

It's seeing potential in a small detail. I'm seeing original thinking.

I just see a bulls eye, and such great energy and ability, but the lack of confidence. And so, I feel like you're at a time where you're stopping yourself, or won't aim for something out of fear of failing. I also got the sentence biting your tongue. I'm sorry if you're in a situation where you can't speak up for yourself, as this is not aligned with your character.

Overall I believe your a creative but practical person, and have the ability to really pull through and create wonderful things. You can be *very* brave as well as motivated and so I feel you inspire others, as well as surprise them.

I really do feel that with worthiness, it is hinting to confidence/self esteem issues as it says "know that you deserve to receive good in all ways".

You deserve to be successful. You deserve to take the career path that you have been thinking about. You deserve people to treat you well. You deserve to have that hobby, whether you're "good" or not.

Deep down somewhere you know you are bigger than this. I am wishing for a healthy full confidence boost for you and some new energy to help push you.

Please have the courage to aim, as bob ross says:

"we don't make mistakes, we make happy little accidents"

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And that's the last of them! I hope you enjoyed, and I hoped this help you feel a little better about yourself. We need to cheer ourselves up sometimes and let ourselves think good things. We attract more honey with sugar after all!

Until the next pick a card!

Thank you!

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londonhalcyon · 3 years

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@a-more-delicious-happiness: Or maybe a potions class in the next year after Fear Itself...I wonder if Merula would feel herself wanting Lily's attention and but hating it at the same time...catching herself when her snark borders on flirty (not that she'd ever admit it...yet)

Here’s a more light-hearted one this time! (Or as light-hearted as Year Four Merula can be.) It’s not exactly flirty, but it’s still fun.

* * * *

Corrective Lenses (Merula)

Flores and Khanna were talking in Potions again. True, they were always talking in Potions, but after a full summer of peace and quiet, Merula had forgotten how annoying they were.

“Should we set out cushions?” Khanna was saying as she took her usual seat to the right of Flores. “If I start sleepwalking in the middle of the night, I’m going to fall all the way to the bottom of the tower. I know it.”

“We could try using a spell or something to lock the door,” Flores suggested, sitting down to the right of Merula. “But then Skye and I would have to unlock it early when we get up for Quidditch practice, so that might not work.”

“What about an alarm instead? If someone starts to leave, it will wake up the rest of us to catch them.”

“That might backfire…in more ways than one.”

“What do you mean? Oh. Oh, you’re right. So, back to the cushions…?”

Merula cleared her throat. It was the second day of the term, and they were already playing Curse-Breaker. Even she wasn’t ready to start thinking about curses yet, although that was a touch unusual for her, she would admit. All she knew was that she didn’t want them to be having this conversation while she was sitting right there, when they were fully aware that they had thoroughly humiliated her last year in the race for the second Vault.

The birdbrains broke off their conversation to turn their attention to Merula. It was perhaps fortunate that Snape interrupted whatever irritating thing Flores had been about to say in response. “The Calming Draught,” the Potions Master drawled. “If you cannot guess from such a simple name, this draught calms the drinker following a shock or emotional outburst. Turn to page 219 in your textbooks. You’ll find all the instructions there. Begin.”

There was the usual shuffle of activity as everyone carved out their workspaces for the next hour. Pages fluttered, glass clinked, and flames flickered to life—all the sounds of a potion about to be brewed. Five minutes later, as if on cue, the quiet chatter resumed around the room. It would have been too much for Merula to hope her table would be any different.

“Merula. Good to see you,” Flores said. She didn’t look up from her textbook as she said it.

You know damn well that’s a lie, Merula thought.

She hadn’t seen Flores since the end of last term, and by “see,” she meant they had exchanged glares across the Great Hall. Their last actual encounter had involved Flores hiding behind Barnaby, who she had stolen from Merula. With complete disregard for any previous loyalty, the dumb brute had proceeded to give both Merula and Ismelda a number of bruises, effectively ruining a year’s worth of planning and effort by handing the victory to Flores. Based on the death stare Ismelda was keeping trained on their table from across the room, she wasn’t over it either.

Merula had calmed down some over the summer, but it still stung. If she was being honest, though, she was starting to feel tired. Of what, she wasn’t completely sure. She was just tired.

It was perhaps because of this exhaustion that Merula said, “Flores. Still wearing glasses, I see.” Which wasn’t the wittiest remark she had ever made.

Khanna, who was also wearing glasses, looked up from her cauldron with an expression of befuddlement. Flores raised her head so that Merula could see her eyes roll. “‘Good to see you too, Lily. How was your summer?’” Flores said sardonically. When Merula didn’t engage, she added, “Of course I’m still wearing them. I would prefer to see beyond my nose, thank you very much.”

“When possible,” Khanna said. She was now leaning far away from her steaming cauldron, waiting for the fog to clear away from her lenses.

Flores smiled sympathetically. “Mum is finally going to schedule that appointment for me with the Muggle doctor. For contacts. Are you sure you don’t want to come?”

“I told you, I’m not touching my eyes.” Khanna gave a shudder. “Ugh, I don’t even want to think about it.”

“You’re witches,” Merula said. “Fix your sight with a spell or something. I changed my eye color when I was ten.”

“It’s more complicated than that,” Flores said. “Mum said altering the lens of the eye itself is complicated and risky magic. You need a professional to perform the spell, and professionals cost a lot of Galleons. Until someone invents an easier spell, I’m sticking with the Muggle solution.”

“Whatever. I could probably still do it,” Merula said.

“I’m not gonna let you permanently ruin my eyesight.”

“But you’ll let a Muggle put something in your eyes?”

“No, I’ll be the one to put them in.”

“That’s…worse.”

Khanna threw her hands in the air. “Thank you! Someone said it!”

“If you’re talking, I expect your potions to be simmering by now,” Snape’s voice growled behind them. They ducked their heads so low that their noses almost touched their textbooks. Merula scowled at the measurements on the page. She hadn’t wanted to be a part of this ridiculous conversation anyway. How had she let them draw her in?

They refocused on their potions, and after a few minutes of the methodical work, Merula’s irritation faded. There was always something so relaxing about potion making—present in the way she measured out the exact amount of peppermint oil she needed or in the way she stirred the deep blue liquid with precision. The smell of lavender filled the room, not unlike the flowers that grew in the garden back home.

Merula’s potion was simmering well before Flores’s and Khanna’s, much to her satisfaction. Khanna was still struggling to cut up her crocodile heart, her face tilted away from the chemical-soaked organ as if she expected it to explode. Flores was in the process of stirring in the last of her ingredients. The intensity with which she stared into her cauldron was laughable. Her glasses had slipped down to the tip of her nose to rest in front of her flushed cheeks, and the steam was beginning to curl her hair into loose ringlets.

Does my happiness really depend on this girl?

The question had popped into Merula’s mind out of nowhere, but she was surprised to find she wasn’t startled by the idea. More…curious.

She thought of the songbook sitting back in her dorm, tucked safely in her trunk. She hadn’t asked for that songbook, yet she had grown attached to it nevertheless. After weeks of trying (and failing) over and over and over again to prove that she was strong enough, that she was capable on her own, that she was greater than the very incarnation of fear, it had been that songbook and the snow and a memory of a smile that had given her the ability to cast the brightest, warmest light she had ever seen. And now she was trying to figure out what that meant.

Flores tilted her head back in an awkward attempt to keep her glasses from falling into her cauldron. Merula pretended to reread the instructions in her textbook while she fought to suppress her laughter. No, her happiness most definitely did not depend on Lilianna Flores. Still…

I hate you.

Merula watched Flores out of the corner of her eye, testing out the thought. It would have been true three years ago. It might have been true a year ago. But, now, the silent statement invoked no emotional reaction. The words were empty, meaningless.

Which was ridiculous because Flores was annoying and a know-it-all and not even all that pretty. Why wouldn’t Merula hate someone that was about to ruin her own potion with all the sweat running down her face?

With a quiet huff, Merula focused on adding the finishing touches to her draught. Like she had thought: ridiculous.

“Everything okay there, Rowan?” Flores asked in amusement.

“Yeah.” A pause. “Unrelated, but I’m considering becoming a vegetarian.”

Flores chuckled. “You don’t have the lavender over there, do you?”

Without looking away from her cauldron (she needed to complete the exact number of clockwise and anticlockwise stirs), Merula used her free hand to slide the jar of lavender across the table. No one took it from her. The glass remained pressed against the tips of her fingers by the time she finished her last stir.

Potion done, Merula looked up. “What?”

Flores had fixed her glasses. Finally. But she was smiling at Merula for some reason, which was somehow worse. “Nothing,” she said, and accepted the jar. “Thanks.”

Khanna looked between them, her befuddled expression having returned. This time, Merula shared her sentiment.

“Yeah, whatever,” Merula mumbled, her wit sharp as ever. She kept her gaze firmly on her own workspace for the rest of class. She didn’t look to her right once. Not as she bottled her potion. Not as she cleaned her side of the table. Not even as she felt the eyes fixed upon her. Blue eyes, half-hidden behind foggy lenses.

Merlin, this was going to be a weird year, wasn’t it?

Then again, Merula would be disappointed if it wasn’t.

#the mad witch #hphm #hogwarts mystery #merula snyde #lilianna flores #rowan khanna #merula x mc #those years in between

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hookingminor · 4 years

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the way that you love me - anthony beauvillier

a/n: inspired by pov by ariana, a lot of it is from tito’s perspective. lightly edited. all fluff. thank you @thirteenisles for telling me to write for tito

word count: 2.5k

summary: anthony’s been in love with you for a long time

Anthony was in love with you.

He knew it from the moment he met you that he was done for. There really wasn’t anything inherently special about you, which probably wasn’t the nicest thing to say, but it was true. But when you smiled at him for the first time and extended your hand in introduction, something inside of him shifted.

It was subtle, almost imperceptible, and he didn’t even register it at first, but then he shook your hand and a calm settled over him. Anthony didn’t understand what it meant then, but he understood it now.

It was the same feeling he felt right now as he watched you sleep next to him your hair strewn across the pillow and mouth slightly agape. Soft snores escaped your lips, though you always denied it when he told you. It bothered him a bit at the beginning, the snores used to keep him awake during late nights when he had early morning practice. Now he couldn’t sleep without you, snoring and all.

You looked so peaceful lying beside him. With one hand lightly holding onto his bicep, his heart fluttered. It was something you always did when you were asleep: reach out until you grabbed some body part.

When he came home late at night from road trips across the country and settled into bed, you never failed to do the same thing. You were a notoriously heavy sleeper, but whenever Anthony slid under the sheets, you swatted in his direction until you came into contact with him. Whatever you hit, you grabbed onto before rolling over and crawling as close to him as possible.

The first time it happened, all Anthony could do was laugh. He thought you might’ve been awake and that his return woke you, but when he didn’t see your breathing change or eyes flicker open, his chest had gotten so tight he was afraid it would burst.

An overwhelming softness consumed him at that, and it hit him with full force every time it happened. It was the little things. You never realized you did it, nor did he ever tell you.

“Stop staring, weirdo,” you peeked one eye open and caught Anthony looking at you.

Anthony coughed out the stiffness in his throat before replying.

“I can’t help it,” he chuckled, hoping you couldn’t see through him and how vulnerable he was feeling right now, “You’re so beautiful in the morning.”

Whatever Anthony was afraid of you seeing, you didn’t because you rolled your eyes.

“Can you make me some tea, please?” You called out to your boyfriend who was rummaging through the kitchen.

“Yeah, give me a minute,” he hollered back, and you heard the coffee machine running to dispense hot water.

Anthony reached over your shoulder from behind to place the mug on the table next to your textbooks. He paused halfway through his retreat to rest his hand on your shoulder and gave you a soft kiss on top of your head.

“Baby, you have three other mugs in front of you,” Anthony said, noticing the half-filled mugs in front of you.

You shrugged, “It tastes better when you make it.”

Anthony left you to continue your studies, but your statement replayed in his mind as he went into the living room and turned on whatever game was playing at the moment. You’d said it without hesitation, and Anthony doubted you even processed what you said.

It was all he could think about.

Later that night when he went to clear the table after you’d disappeared to take a shower, he saw that the only mug that was empty was the one he’d made for you earlier.

He noticed everything after that. Every morning before you left, there was always a mug semi-filled with coffee or tea resting on the counter that you’d made before going to class. Every evening when he made you a cup of tea before bed, you drank every drop.

Intrinsically, Anthony knew he didn’t make tea any better than the next person, but it never failed to brighten his mood every time he woke up and saw the empty tea mug from the night before sitting on the nightstand.

Anthony knew you had your doubts sometimes. Not about him. Never about him.

But he knew you had insecurities. About your relationship, about yourself and the need you had to compare yourself to other girls, about why Anthony was even with you to begin with.

None that you ever voiced them with him, but he could tell when you began to pull away and close yourself off from him. He never understood why or what caused it, but he could always read the signs leading up to it.

Anthony also knew how to snap you out of it. The first time it happened, he feared you were going to break up with him, but now he was practically a professional.

“What are your plans for the night? Are you still going out with the guys?”

You had been unusually quiet during dinner, and now you were hand washing the dishes instead of just putting them in the dishwasher; a telltale sign you were thinking too much and needed a mundane task to clear your head.

Approaching you from behind, Anthony wrapped his arms around your abdomen and nuzzled his face into your neck.

“Actually, I was thinking we should stay in for the night,” the words sounded muffled against your skin, and the vibrations tickled, which only caused Anthony to squeeze you tighter.

“Oh?” You questioned, unable to stop the smile tugging at your lips.

“Mhmm,” he hummed as he reached forward to turn off the sink, “I can’t neglect my girl right before leaving for a road trip.”

“You’re not leaving for another two days.”

“Then we’ve got less time than I thought,” Anthony said with fake realization, “Better get started now.”

You squealed in surprise as Anthony spun you around and hiked you up by your thighs. He had no care for the wet hands clutching onto his shoulders as you steadied yourself. Leaving the dirty dishes to be dealt with later, he carried you from the kitchen and into the bedroom where he spent all night showing you just how much he loved you.

“How’s Y/N doing?” Mat asked Anthony when they boarded the plane, “Tell her I say hi.” He’d plopped down next to Anthony who was sending you one final text before take off, and Mat knew that love struck face anywhere. It was a face he only reserved for you, and Mat didn’t have to look at his phone to know Anthony was texting you.

“She’s doing well,” Anthony answered, firing off an ‘I love you’ before locking his phone.

“Yeah? You guys are still coming to the wedding next month, right?” Mat asked. One of their teammates was finally tying the knot, and Anthony knew Mat was only asking so he didn’t have to be the only single one there. He would still be the only single one, but Mat always inserted himself into yours and Anthony’s relationship whenever he had to third wheel.

“Yeah, we’ll be there,” Anthony replied with an eye roll as he checked his phone one last time to see you’d replied with an ‘I love you too’ before switching it to airplane mode.

“God, it’s just a matter of time before you two are getting hitched and I’m left all alone,” Mat sighed before pulling an eye mask over his head and putting in his headphones.

Mat made the comment in passing; he didn’t understand the weight of what he’d just said, and he was already brushing it off and leaving Anthony to sit and think about it.

Maybe Anthony should’ve felt panicked after the realization hit, but all he felt was that same sense of calm wash over him. He’d never given much thought to his future. He definitely didn’t plan on ending things with you and when he pictured himself in five years, you were always there beside him but he’d never made definitive plans.

Mat began dozing off as the plane took flight, but Anthony was wide awake. He knew he wanted to marry you, he was sure about that. There was no doubt in his mind that you were the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, but the feeling was all-consuming.

He was happy, yes. Calm in a way he’d never felt before but also nervous. It wasn’t something you two had ever talked about, and for the first time, Anthony was insecure. He imagined it’s what you felt like when you started pushing away, and he finally understood.

Would you even want to get married? Did you want a life with him? Kids? A picket fence? The whole nine-yards?

Anthony knew he would give you anything you wanted, but the question was: Did you want him to?

As you flitted around the party, Anthony watched you with intent eyes. The girls had stolen you away earlier in the evening demanding pictures and that you mingle with them instead of hanging onto Anthony the entire night, not that Anthony minded that. He very much preferred when you were near him, if only to stop the chirps he was receiving.

“God, you’re such a lost puppy without her,” Jordan commented, snapping Anthony from his stupor as his gaze flickered back to his friends. Anthony blushed, knowing the comment was directed at him, but he had no comeback.

“Ease off, he’s just imagining his own wedding now,” Matt teased with a knowing look. Nearly all the guys had been there before, and Anthony knew they meant it in good fun.

“Popping the question any time soon, Beau?” Scott asked as he took a swig of his beer. Being the most recent one to get married, he understood the feeling probably better than the other married guys.

“Not soon but thinking about it,” Anthony admitted sheepishly. He wasn’t one to talk about his feelings with the guys. Sure, he went to one of the older ones if he ever needed advice, but those times were few and far between. By the raised brows of everyone near him, he could tell they were shocked with his admission. Happy, nonetheless, but still surprised.

Anthony had started thinking about it during the road trip when Mat had unknowingly dropped that bomb on him. He thought about it constantly, but he still hadn’t brought it up to you yet.

“Really? Good for you, dude,” Jordan said, and suddenly Anthony felt shy.

He couldn’t help it, his eyes shifted back to find you in the middle of conversation with Sydney as you snapped some pictures for other girls. You were glowing. You always glowed to Anthony, and maybe it was the wedding atmosphere, but right now, it was like you had a halo surrounding you.

Your face lit up at something someone said, and even though you were across the room, he could hear your laughter in his head.

The other guys exchanged a few glances between themselves as Anthony’s attention was stolen again by you. They couldn’t really blame him, they’d all been in his shoes at some point.

As the night dragged on and the drinks flowed freely, Anthony absorbed all of it: the soft voice you used when talking to the young kids who begged you to play with them, the way you clutched onto his arm when you made your rounds and mingled with other guests, the atrocious line dancing you did with Mat since Anthony refused to cotton-eye joe.

“Come on,” you said out of breath as you extended your hand to Anthony. You were tired from the long dance and a slower one had come on right after, “Just one dance.”

With a heavy sigh, Anthony took your hand as you led him to the dance floor for a slow dance. Your face was warm for the exertion and alcohol, and even a little sweaty and smudged, Anthony thought you were gorgeous.

His hands fell to your waist as yours wrapped around his neck, and he pulled your body flushed with his. You swayed to the music and rested your head on his chest.

“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you,” Anthony mumbled against your hair. Although unprompted, it wasn’t unwelcome.

“Oh yeah? Why is that?” You asked, pulling back to look at your boyfriend. It wasn’t normally like Anthony to be this soft, especially in public, but the wedding had only enhanced his good mood.

“Because I can’t even begin to describe how beautiful you are and how much I’m in love with you.”

He said it so simply and casually, as if he were recounting his favorite part of dinner instead of baring his heart for you to see. Your teasing smile softened into one of appreciation.

“Who knew weddings could turn you into such a sap, Beauvis?” you joked lightly, though you pulled yourself closer to him. It was that same stupid nickname Mat had called him one time, and you frequently used it much to Anthony’s dismay.

He tightened his grip on you as he returned your warm smile, and he could see it all right then: his entire life laid out ahead of him with you in the center of it all. Truth be told, Anthony was a sap for you, had been for a long time and you knew it.

“I want a winter wedding, too,” you commented easily after a moment, and Anthony felt his heart rate speed up.

“And if I want a summer wedding?” He threw back, though the smile on his face indicated he was only teasing.

“Hmm…” you paused to ponder the thought, “I think we might have to compromise on a fall wedding then. Summer is too hot for me.”

“Fall sounds nice,” Anthony mused, “A little difficult with the season, but we can make it work if you want.”

“As long as you’re there, I don’t really care when it is,” you replied, and Anthony found himself thinking the same thing.

He didn’t respond after that, deciding to let the music engulf the two of you as you continued to sway. Another slow song followed right after, but Anthony made no motion to leave. He would’ve stayed there all night if you wanted if it weren’t for Mat disrupting your dance and asking to cut in.

Anthony let him take over without hesitation as he didn’t really care much for dancing anyway, but he walked back to your table feeling lighter than he had ever felt in his life.

Unable to stop himself, he pulled out his phone as he watched you and Mat laugh on the dance floor, the song changing to a more upbeat one. Mat spun you away in a dramatic twirl that almost sent you stumbling had it not been for Mat’s hold on your hand.

Anthony smiled to himself as he opened Google to search for engagement rings.

#anthony beauvillier #anthony beauvillier imagine #nhl imagine #hockey imagines #nhl fic #my writing #isles18

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witchesofferngrove · 3 years

Note

“ you had a dream about me? ” with W?

Okay so I went all out for this one and made an aesthetic board for this scenario because... reasons. I just get carried away oops anyway enjoy! (It's very long and honestly? I'm really proud of it)

There is something peaceful about today. W isn’t entirely sure what it is. It could be the setting sun sparkling on the calm waters in front of them, the waves lapping rhythmically against the shore. It could be the quiet of the lakeshore, no other soul around to disturb the little sanctuary they have found themselves in, with only the birdsong to fill the silence. Or it could be the fact that you’re sitting beside them, your legs out-stretched long before you, fingers softly splayed on the blue checkered blanket that you brought for you both to sit on.

For the first time in what feels like weeks, but is more likely to be years, there’s a moment to catch their breath, to allow their eyes to close without fear, to allow themselves to relax. And it wouldn’t have been possible without you.

If they had to guess why there is something so peaceful about today, it would definitely be the latter.

Still, they’re not entirely comfortable. No, they can’t be. W chews the inside of their cheek absently, watching you out of the corner of their eye, but you’re not staring back at them. Instead, you sit with your eyes closed toward the horizon, allowing the sun to play gently on the features of your face.

W can’t help but to admire each and every line, the angles of your cheeks, the contours of your eyes, the way your hair shines in the light. They’ve never been more certain that you are a witch more than today—because there is something magical in the beauty you possess.

But mostly, they can’t stop thinking about last night.

W turns their eyes back to the horizon, resisting the urge to reach their fingers towards yours.

The two of you had been sleeping in the same cabin that you sit outside today. It’s not unusual for the both of you to share a room to sleep, especially with how much you’ve had to travel in the last year. But you’ve always made it perfectly clear that it’s for safety. And Whas respected that, they have. They don’t want to ruin what the two of you have.

And yet… It’s difficult to ignore the gnawing feeling in their stomach when their honey brown eyes graze over your form. Because you were talking in your sleep last night, and though they’re used to the sounds of your nightmares and you waking up in the midst of night screaming, they’re not used to what happened last night.

Because you were moaning.

Moaning their name.

It woke W from their slumber, being a light sleeper as they are, but they found they could not sleep again afterwards. They kept replaying the way their name fell from your lips, half prayer half demand. Over and over.

The memory of it still brings heat and colour to their cheeks.

W looks over at you again.

“You had a dream about me?” they say, though it falls from their lips in a hurried question. Heat explodes in their stomach as their own awkward words replay in their head, and they clear their throat. “Last night, I mean. I think you had a dream about me. You were talking in your sleep again.”

W’s eyes never leave yours, searching desperately for something in your expression—anything to affirm what they have been feeling for the past months is returned. Anything at all. They’re pleased when they find a beet-red blush crawling up your neck as you avert your eyes to the ground.

“I—” You cut yourself off, struggling for words. Normally, in such a situation W would save you from having to explain yourself, never wanting to make you uneasy. But they’re desperate for answers. They just keep hearing their name in your voice. “Sorry,” you say finally, scratching the back of your neck sheepishly. “I didn’t think you would—that I would—Well, I don’t know what you heard but—”

“My name,” W responds immediately, cutting into your sentence, though their words are no more than a whisper. They turn to face you fully now, expression earnest and open and daring. “Just my name. Over and over.”

Your face is wide in shock and embarrassed—your precious, beautiful features open, highlighted by the falling sun. To W, you have never looked more wonderful than you do now. They want to reach out to you. They want to hold you. They want to kiss you. They want to hear you say their name again.

“Oh, Wyatt/Willow,” you breathe, their name falling from your lips against your better judgement.

W’s lips quirk up into a smile, their heart lodged in their throat. “Yes, just like that.”

They gently lift their hand to your face, fingers softly skimming delicate skin on your neck, leaving goosebumps in their wake. You briefly flutter your eyes closed as W’s hand roams up from your neck to trail your jawline before finally settling to cup your cheek. When you open your eyes to look at them, they can feel your heartbeat beneath their touch.

“Tell me to stop,” they murmur, their lips only inches from yours now. “Tell me to go.”

They wait there, hovering in the space between yes and no. Stay or go. They wait for you to push them away, to laugh in their face, to crush every dream they had of you since the moment they met you.

But you don’t do any of that. Instead, your hands move to theirs, encircling their wrists with your fingers, tugging them closer. “Never leave,” you utter, half prayer, half demand.

And then you kiss them.

And everything within them sighs with relief.

- Tori

#so ummmmm i went off with this one #w king #mc #prompts #lis #li reacts #scenario

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arvandus · 3 years

Note

Heyo, could I request #25, Shigaraki and fluff? Congrats on 500!!!!!!

This is my first time writing for Shigaraki, and I must say I totally enjoyed it once I got the rhythm/mood for the scene. I hope you like it! (I also hope you’re still around to see this, since this request was done via anon back in March)

Pairing: Shigaraki x GN!Reader

Word Count: 1707

Warnings: None; just fluffy, soft shiggy

25. “Stay.”

The night sky is heavy with clouds, their thick underbellies colored a sickly greyish brown from the pollution of city lights. You can smell the moisture in the air as you and Shigaraki walk down the now empty streets. Most of the city is asleep now, with only the occasional nocturn passing by – nightshift workers, bar hoppers, seedy dealers. But no matter who passes by, they always steer clear of the two of you. Shigaraki has that effect on people, his presence triggering people’s basic survival instincts that are buried deep in their subconscious.

He doesn’t have that effect on you, though, at least not anymore. It isn’t to say that you don’t recognize his power or his brutality, but you know that you would never be a target of it. With Shigaraki, you are safe. There’s an unspoken alliance between you, built over shared experiences and mutual respect. And it is through this unusual comradery that you’ve grown to understand Shigaraki and, in secret, grown to like him.

He doesn’t know about that last part, though. And you certainly aren’t going to tell him any time soon.

The clouds above deliver on their promise with a sudden crack of thunder that takes you by surprise, followed by an immediate downpour of heavy, thick droplets that immediately soak into your clothes, matting them to your skin. It roars around you, gusts of wind whipping up walls of rain that yank your drenched clothes around your body.

“Shit.” Shigaraki growls. He doesn’t even bother to try to cover himself from the storm, instead letting nature beat itself against him fruitlessly as he stands still as a stone.

Your eyes quickly search for a safe space. You spot a closed store front with an awning over the entrance, a red neon “CLOSED” sign beckoning you to safety with each flicker.

“This way.” You shout over the rain. You hook your arm with his and lead him to the covered space with a run. He doesn’t fight you as your feet splash through the wet puddles already forming on the broken sidewalk, and you pray you don’t slip on the slick concrete, bringing Shigaraki down with you.

Once you’re safe under the awning, you look at Shigaraki and burst into laughter. He is drenched from head to toe, his messy locks lying flat and heavy with water as small rivulets run down his cheeks and his nose. His mouth is pulled into a frown as he looks down at you with annoyance.

“Why are you laughing?” he grumbles. His voice is nearly lost to the drumming of the rain on the metal above you, but you see the words on his chapped lips.

“I mean, look at us...” you giggle. “It’s pretty funny. We’re completely soaked, like two drenched, angry cats.”

“I’d hardly consider that funny.” He replies. The sourness of his tone only makes you giggle harder as you struggle to compose yourself.

“Sometimes, Shig, you just have to savor the moment for what it is.” You explain as you watch the rain fall. “We can’t change it, so we might as well find the humor in it.”

You look back at him, expecting to your eyes to lock with his, only to find find him staring down at your hand – the hand that is still curled around his arm, your fingers nestled into the crook of his elbow.

“Oh,” you exclaim as you relinquish your grip. “Um, sorry.”

He looks up at you finally and you freeze, expecting to see anger in his ruby depths at your audacity. Instead, you find only confusion – raw and strangely innocent in its genuineness. That almost scares you more than his anger because you can’t explain it, you can’t understand its source or what it means. All you do know is that you feel like his eyes are somehow unlocking your own defenses, his blood-red gaze sinking deeper and deeper into you until you have to avert your eyes before he discovers what lies beneath.

Shigaraki doesn’t give so much as a noncommittal grunt to your rushed apology as you look away. Silence falls like a blanket, suffocating and warm, and your heart flutters like a moth as you bask in Shigaraki’s presence. You watch the sheets of rain come down, glittering drops dancing in the pull and ebb of the wind that beats against your pant legs. As you watch quietly, your fingers curl together as the memory of the feel of Shigaraki’s arm lingers on your fingertips.

You don’t know if he’s watching the rain the same as you, or if his eyes are elsewhere – tracing the curves of your profile or watching your clenched hands that were clinging to him so comfortably just moments before. You resist the urge to look at him again out of fear of getting caught, even though you swear you can still feel his eyes on you. But eventually the two of you fall into a shared calmness – a small, peaceful haven in a wild, violent world. The storm fades to a gentler rain after a couple of minutes pass, and it’s in that moment that time seems to slow down. It’s like standing inside a watercolor painting, the bright colors of the neon signs and streetlights reflecting off the rivers of water racing across the pavement. They mix and blend into a sea of colors as the raindrops sparkle in the lamplight like diamonds. Let your vision blur just enough, and it’s as if you’re in the center of the universe, floating amongst the stars and nebulas, and you and Shigaraki are two celestial bodies locked in orbit around each other, pulled together yet still achingly separate in a perfect balance of gravity.

The rain stops as suddenly as it came, bringing with it a numb silence before the tinkling sound of water returns to your years. It sounds like bells. There are the small bells that ring like windchimes as water drips through the trees, bouncing from leaf to leaf to finally land on the tops of cars and trash can lids. There are the heavy bells that sound a gong, big fat drops that fall from the rooftop architecture to resound on the awning above your heads. And there’s all the other sounds in between – the passing hum of the occasional car, their tires kicking up oil-slicked spray from the black streets; the rivers flooding down into the rain gutters that sit like wide, open mouths drinking thirstily; the soft gust of wind that makes the signs swing on creaky hinges. It’s beauty in every sense of the word, every detail perfect in its own way.

You want to stay here, to linger with Shigaraki and savor the quiet beauty that’s spread out before you. But the chill is soaking into your bones now, your fingertips icy numb. You inhale a deep breath of cold, wet air and let out a sigh as your breath fogs the space in front of you. “Looks like it’s over, for now...” you say. “We should get going.”

You take a step forward. But before you can duck out from beneath the now-dripping sun shade, a finger hooks with yours, halting your escape.

“Stay.” The word falls softly from his lips, barely audible.

You turn to look at him, your eyes wide, mouth parted. A rogue droplet of rainwater rolls down your cheek before catching in the corner of your mouth. You lick at it, taking it in on your tongue and Shigaraki is watching, his ruby eyes nearly black in the night.

He gives a gentle tug with his pinky and you follow his lead, closing the gap between you as you rejoin him. The corners of his mouth no longer pull into a frown or even a grin – instead they hold the slightest hint of a curve, barely noticeable unless you’re standing as close to him as you are. It adds a softness to his features that you’d never seen before. And his eyes... they’ve gone from hard-cut gems to liquid pools, his brow free of the usual stress lines and his lids relaxed as he looks down at you. The thumb of his free hand comes up to brush against your lower lip and you inhale at the feel of his calloused touch – a touch so destructive and yet, in this moment, so tender.

“Wh...what are you doing?” you whisper.

“Savoring the moment.” He replies.

You swallow the lump in your throat – surely it must be your heart, trying to escape with its newfound wings – and close your eyes, falling deeper into the sensation of his touch on your sensitive skin. Time freezes and you’re stuck in this moment hanging in blissful limbo. Surely, you’d wanted. You’d wanted, but never actually thought, never hoped, not even for the slightest moment...

You hear the rustle of his jacket and time springs forward again, bringing with it the softest brush of his lips against yours. They’re chapped and scarred, a rough, imperfect offering of himself. His lips move with inexperience dressed in uncertainty, but you accept it gratefully, your body leaning into the kiss, your lips sharing in the slow dance with his own.

Just as your free hand finds itself on the line of his jaw, the wet strands of his hair tickling the back of your palm, he pulls away slightly, breaking the kiss. He stares at you with a tender gaze and for the first time you feel a peacefulness emanating from him that wasn’t there before. It mirrors the quiet evening surrounding you, a calm that can only be felt when its existence is put in contrast to the storm the came before it.

You smile at him softly as you move your position to stand next to him. With your pinkies still linked, you rest your head on his shoulder and watch as the rain begins to fall again. Shigaraki is like the storm - a hurricane of rage and pain that takes no prisoners, yet beautiful in his destructive force. But for now.... for now, you’re both sitting in his center, in the eye where the air is still and the skies are clear, and you see a different kind of beauty, a beauty that you weren't sure existed in him. And you know that as long as you stay by his side, you’re safe.

#Arv's 500 Followers Event #Shigaraki x Reader #tomura x y/n #shigaraki x you #soft shigaraki #shigaraki tomura #Shigaraki

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entishramblings · 4 years

Text

What Haunts Your Heart [Legolas X Reader]

A.N: helllllo! So first off, WOW thank you for 900 followers!! I can’t believe it enough of you think I’m this interesting to follow hehe. AnYwAyS....here is yet another Legolas one-shot because, as we all know, I’m obsessed with him

Request: @guardianofrivendell - Hi! Can I ask for a Legolas oneshot? I really love your writing and I want to see how you would write this. So you're having nightmares, and Legolas notices. One night he has enough and tries to cuddle you and surprisingly it works. So from then on he does this every night without you knowing he does it. Then one night you wake up before him and tadaaaa... Chaos. Can be romantic (please?) with a bit of angst?

Pairing: Legolas X Reader

Summary: (Y/N) is a member of the fellowship and begins to have nightmares. Legolas notices and is very worried.

Word Count: 2,839

Warnings: fluff, lil bit of angst

(gif not mine)

MASTERLIST

A gentle chilling breeze blew upon the sleeping fellowship, dancing among their unconscious forms. It was quiet and calm—for the most part that is. Legolas was the only one not in a deep slumber. He laid on his back next to (Y/N) for the third night in a row, deep in his thoughts.

Concern began to pool in his mind as the sound of tiny whimpers met his elvish ears, not noticeable to any other. That was the only downside to heightened hearing he supposed—being able to capture the small whispers and cries of those suffering when no one else could. It was saddening; more so, almost always he could not do anything to help....especially now. Though, tonight the sound did not come from a distance village or a nearing war, it came from the woman beside him.

(Y/N) was a strong minded and smart individual; she brought much to the fellowship—skills of healing, fighting, planning. She was strategic and her expertise was valued greatly, despite her intimidating nature. All of these characteristics seemed to make her appear so tough and unconquerable; anything thrown at her she would throw right back. (Y/N) was a woman of war; she could hold her own, that was for sure. So, seeing her haunted in her sleep was....strange for the elf. Legolas knew she had seen many horrors, as he had, but what was so gruesome and troubling that it crept its way into her darkest dreams?

Another small whimper escaped (Y/N)’s throat.

She was on her side facing Legolas, which gave him a clear view. He watched as her expression distorted into one of pain and worry. Her eyebrows furrowed and her lips pulled tight. She began to squirm in her sleep, rotating so her back was towards the elf. Yet he still saw the woman’s small fist clench the fabric of the blanket draped around her.

A third cry flushed from her mouth.

Legolas couldn’t take it anymore. The sounds were so heartbreaking. They pulled harsh aches of agony from his chest, tormenting him with sadness. He couldn’t bear to see her like this any longer. Three nights he had witnessed this, and three night he had done nothing.

The blonde elf scooted closer to her until his chest was pressed against her back. He used his arm to prop himself up in order to see her face. Ever so gently, he brushed away the hairs that had come loose from her braid, revealing her tear stained cheeks.

“Oh, (Y/N).” He whispered sadly.

Legolas wiped the moisture away softly and spoke once more, “I wish I could take away what haunts your heart.”

He begun to smooth her hair and caress her cheek. The tender sensation seemed to calm her unconscious form for the tears stopped falling and her lips ceased quivering.

The elf could not help but stare fondly as he continued the light action. He began to trace the shadows that were created upon her skin. The moonlight accentuated them clearly, showing the sharp curve of her jaw and gentle bends of her features. When (Y/N) wasn’t dreaming of horrors, scowling at maps, or beheading orcs, her expression was calm and tranquil. She was quite beautiful, indeed.

Legolas forced his eyes to pull away and he quietly laid down, curling his body around her. As his warmth radiated into her being she begun to relax against him. A quiet sigh escaped her mouth and she stopped the shaking that previous racked her body; instead, she seemed to push into him further. Legolas smiled at her unconscious action. It was sweet and adorable, really. He draped one of his muscular arms over her waist and pulled her closer—if that was even possible. He buried his head into the softness of her hair and inhaled the lavender and forestry scent that lingered among it. He allowed the sound of her heartbeat and gentle breaths to take the place of the anxieties lingering in his thoughts. Being so close to (Y/N) not only calmed her, but it initiated a peace within Legolas as well. He desperately tried to hide it, but he had craved this closeness with her; he had craved this comfort. Legolas had never met a women so unusual—in a good way that is. (Y/N) cared not for dresses and trinkets. She preferred the outdoors to the safeness of stone walls. She was interested in skills beyond those of a stereotypical maiden. And Legolas adored this.

Slowly, his mind drifted to sleep as he blocked the nightmares from her mind, like a shield would to arrows.

......

Legolas woke the next morning to the light smell of charcoal and burning wood. It was comforting for it reminded him of the warm fires the elves would have in Mirkwood—especially during the winter season. But that comfort instantly turned into panic. His blue orbs flung open and his heart raced.

Oh how he hoped no one had seen the....compromising....position him and (Y/N) were in.

Of course, cuddling wasn’t considered compromising in the most basic definition, but it was reserved to those who were courting or wed—and Legolas and (Y/N) were neither of those. Yet, their bodies were molded together and their position held still all night.

The blonde elf sat up quickly to meet the grey eyes of the Ranger.

Aragorn looked at him with raised eyebrows, “Are you alright, Mellon Nin (my friend)?”

Legolas’s brows furrowed and he tilted his head slightly before releasing a deep exhale. Maybe the Ranger would not comment on the previous closeness of the two? He focused back on his friend but the look on Aragorn’s face did not falter.

The Elven Prince cleared his throat, “Yes, yes I am alright. I was just—just—“

Aragorn interrupted him, “Cuddling with (Y/N)?”

“Yes—I mean no.....I mean......Aragorn.....” he trailed off.

A smile ghosted across the Ranger’s face as he turned back to tending to the small flames.

Legolas sighed and stood up. He trudged towards his friend and plopped down on a dark textured log next to him.

“She has been having nightmares,” Legolas stated simply.

Aragorn glanced at the elf out of the coroner of his eye. “(Y/N)?” He questioned in surprise.

Legolas nodded, “She never wakes but she suffers greatly. I can see it.”

The Ranger stared into the coals that he was poking. This new information worried him for he had known (Y/N) for a long time—even trained her—and this was something new and out of character. “Do you know of what she dreams?”

Legolas shook his head and glanced down at his hands, “I always thought her so strong. I know not what haunts her.”

A long stretch of silence passed between them before the Ranger spoke once more, a teasing tone upon his voice, “So naturally, you had to cuddle her.”

Legolas sent him a glare, “Well no—I just—I—it...it was the only way to stop her cries.”

Aragorn sighed, the smirk that had previously plastered across his face faded into a serious expression. He dropped the stick and turned his full attention towards Legolas. “Don’t think that it has escaped me, Mellon Nin (my friend).”

The elf frowned, “What do you mean?”

The dark haired man shrugged, “The way you look at her.”

Legolas was clearly takin aback by this comment for he stiffened and drew his eyes away.

A light chuckle left the Ranger’s lips. “You forget I was raised by your kin. I recognize those elvish looks of longing.”

Legolas felt a deep blush creep up his neck and into the tips of his pointed ear. He didn’t know what to say—what could he even try to say? Aragorn had figured him out. But luck seemed to be on his side for the waking groans of Gimli halted their conversation.

.......

The past week had been difficult. The fellowship had trudged through rugged terrain and rough rocky tundra. It was taxing on them all, even the elf. In order for his companions to get the rest they needed, Legolas had offered to take nights watch more often when they were exposed with no cover. He still kept a careful eye on (Y/N) though. When he was not cuddling her he could see the dark dreams take hold. Her brows would scrunch together and the soft cries would return. Therefore, as soon as his watch was over he would wake the next and then nestle his body against the young woman’s. And soon enough, the soft whimpers and heartbreaking cries would end and the shaking and rustling would cease. No longer were her dreams filled with agony and fear.

For some reason, the thought of (Y/N) discovering Legolas’s nightly cuddles never crossed his mind.....not until it actually happened, that is.

It was sometime past midnight when (Y/N) unexpectedly woke up. The reason—she knew not. But she was surprised to feel so.....so warm. The nights had been getting colder as they moved north and the chill did not escape her every morning. So, the puzzlement of the additional heat flooded her foggy thoughts. (Y/N)’s tired brain began to process her surroundings further. She became aware of the extra weight wrapped around her waist—then the smell of pine and honey, then the gentle breaths near her neck. However, it wasn’t until the sound of a content sigh and the motion of being pulled closer into a firm mass, that she realized she was indeed curled against someone.

Alarm instantly fueled her body. (Y/N) immediately launched herself into a sitting position and turned to see just who had been cuddling her. Her wild eyes were met with the sight of a groggy elf who was entirely confused by the sudden movement. (Y/N) watched as Legolas propped himself up on his elbow and peeled his lids open. He slowly looked at the empty spot next to him, then feeling a gaze on his form, turned to look at (Y/N).

“(Y/N)?” He questioned in a disoriented daze, his voice deep and slightly raspy.

She didn’t answer she just stared at him, breathing heavily from the adrenaline.

Legolas casually rubbed his eyes with one hand before speaking again in a heavy whisper, “What is it?”

“Legolas?!” She hissed. Her voice was full of exasperated shock, annoyance, and anger. “What the fuck are you doing?!”

His brows pulled together as he looked at her in surprise, the curse in her sentence heightening his attention slightly.

(Y/N) clarified the question in irritation when he did not respond, “Why were you spooning me?!”

“I...was just...I mean I....”

The young women rolled her eyes before reaching outwards. A loud smack echoed amongst the emptiness of the night—drawing the attention of the uncrowned king on watch.

“LEGOLAS!” She whisper-yelled, “Wake up!”

The elf was cupping his cheek and his expression was filled with bewilderment—lips parted, eyes wide.

Cruel? Maybe, but it worked.

“Why were you cuddling me?” She repeated once more.

“You...you have been having nightmares. Crying in your sleep. This has been the only way to—“

She jabbed a finger at him, “Stop. Just stop.” She glared at him, “I have not been having nightmares.”

Legolas frowned, “Yes, you have.”

(Y/N) narrowed her eyes and stood up, “I don’t know what you are talking about.” She crossed her arms. “I. Don’t. Get. Nightmares.”

The elf sighed, “(Y/N)...”

But she turned on her heal and stomped off.

Legolas let out yet another exasperated sigh. Did she think that he thought less of her for her nightmares? Why is she refusing to admit to them?

“Go after her,” the voice of Aragorn stated plainly.

Legolas snapped his head upwards to look at his friend. He was unaware that Aragorn had been watching and now embarrassment filled his soul. Had Aragorn really witnessed all of that? Even the slap?

The elf pushed those thoughts from his mind for he had more important this to worry about —(Y/N). He grabbed his two long-knives and went after the young woman.

......

Legolas made his way through the large rocks and jagged territory until he found her perched on a particularly large bolder, overlooking the land. He sat down next to her and held out one of the silver weapons.

“It is unwise to go off in your own unarmed.”

(Y/N) pulled her knees to her chest, ignoring him.

The Elven Prince sighed. He gently placed the one knife next to her and let his hands play with the second one. His gaze wandered across the horizon as the two sat in frustrated silence. The sun was just beginning to rise, the assortment of brilliant colors not yet bleeding among the stars. If it wasn’t for the tension between them, the elf would have felt at peace—which was rare during these dark times.

It was a while before anyone spoke.

“(Y/N), please do not lie to me,” Legolas stated gently. “I know dreams have been tormenting you and I do not think any less of you because of it. Tell me what bothers you so.”

A long pause stretched between them before (Y/N) released a shaky breath. Her eyes did not move from the landscape before them. “I have seen life leave so many—brutal, bloody deaths. Strider and I have travelled far across Arda, yet it is all the same—death. And now? Now that the ring has been found, is there to be any hope? I cannot watch another I care for die. Not again.”

Legolas glanced down at the knife in his hand, “At night they come to you, don’t they? You see their faces? That is what haunts your heart?”

(Y/N) slowly drew her gaze towards the elf. “They come for you too?” She whispered quietly.

Legolas looked at her softly, “They used to, many ages ago.”

Trying not to show her desperation she spoke again, “How did you make it stop?”

Legolas cleared his throat and took a moment to collect his thoughts. “I focused on what I could—the happiness in the present. Anchor your heart on what is in front of you—your friends. Aragorn, Gandalf, Boromir, Gimli, the hobbits....me. We are all bonded by this fellowship. Take comfort in it.”

The elf scooted closer to her and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her her ear. His touch lingered on her cheek and jaw. “Do not push your friends from you.”

(Y/N) lowered her gaze as a light blush crept up to her cheeks at the elf’s gentle trace.

“(Y/N),” he whispered. Yet she would not meet his eye. Legolas cautious tucked two fingers under her chin and forced her to look at him. “It hurts my heart to see you in such pain. Why did you not come to me about this?”

She hesitated, “I did not want any of you see me as weak—especially as the only woman here.”

Legolas shook his head, “I do not. You are a warrior and this is something all warriors have to bare.”

(Y/N) nodded slightly and turned her head towards the sunrise. The two watched in silence as orange and pinks stretched across the sky, waking up the earth. It was a beautiful sight really. The soft noises of nature reached their ears, and as (Y/N) listened to the songs of the birds she allowed her mind to drift into thought. The elf’s words did indeed bring her some comfort and, quite frankly, she felt stupid for thinking the others would not understand. They were all warriors, were they not? Except the hobbits that is. They have seen the horrors of war and surely they would be reminded of it daily for it was not something one could easily forget. Though one question, slight unrelated, lingered in her mind.

She glanced at the elf beside her, “Legolas? What did you mean when you said it hurts your heart to see my pain?”

He glanced at his feet which were dangling over the edge of the rock before answering, “Do you not know?”

Her brows pulled together in confusion, clearly not understanding.

Legolas hesitantly leaned in. When (Y/N) did not back away, he gently pressed his lips against hers. Slowly, she responded, moving her mouth with his. The Elven Prince’s hand weaved its way into her locks of hair, feeling the silky strands as if they were ripples in a running river. (Y/N) then cupped his cheek with one hand, and used the other to trail up his muscular chest. The two pulled closer, desperate for the comforting touch of the other. The kiss was tender, soft, and wet. It was something they held onto tightly. It was the consolation from the horrors of the world, and they had found that safety in each other. Eventually, they pulled away, but reluctant to lose the other’s warmth they resting their foreheads together. The blonde elf softly caressed her cheek while they absorbed the comfort of the moment.

“Legolas?” (Y/N) whispered.

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry for slapping you.”

A light chuckle bellowed from the elf’s chest and his lips curved into a smile. “To be fair, I somewhat deserved it.”

603 notes · View notes

7wanderingpaws · 4 years

Text

Mess We Made - second (m)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: arranged marriage au (not bbh), doctor AU, university AU (this chapter only), fluff, ANGST

Words: 12K

WARNINGS: language, unprotected sex, terrible family relations, stalking

Quick A/N: Goodness. This is long. I need to sleep! ENJOY! And thank you for patiently waiting ❤

tags: @byunfirstlady @blackon @puppyeoliepop @in3vitably3v3 @mangobaek @bobohumyonlyboo @wooya1224 @exortedgoods @gureuma ( if you want to be tagged/untagged please reply to this post)

>> A very special shoutout to @byunfirstlady because she rocks and deserves all the best! ><

parts: first -- second -- third -- fourth (last)

Mess We Made, part 2

Gentle puffs of hot air were hitting the shell of your ear as he was whispering something to you. The tip of his nose was poking you in the side of your cheek and you giggled, squirming away from him but his hand under your shirt and on your hip were preventing you from doing so.

“Where are you off to,” he whispered teasingly again, smiling widely as he bit your earlobe gently while his arm tightened around you. He wasn’t letting you squirm away that easily. “It’s too early.”

“You literally didn’t let us sleep the whole night,” you whispered back, still shimmying under his wandering hand. “It’s basically time to get up and my eyes are stinging from having no rest,” you pouted, blinking them a few times to prove a point. You were lying on your back while Baekhyun was propped on one elbow, hovering over you. Baekhyun’s shirt was the only piece of clothing on you. While he was completely naked, it seemed to be his second nature by now. After so much time together, his personality and preferences were more than familiar to you.

“Because I want to enjoy you as much as I can. And because I don’t want you to go,” he whined quietly and you giggled again, turning on your side to face him, hiding in his chest. “I really don’t want you to go, love. What do I do?”

You kissed his chest and looked up at him with a small smile. “I won’t go then.”

Baekhyun returned the smile but there was something in his eyes- that something giving you slight uneasiness. He was hesitating. Usually, he would immediately agree and it wasn’t like he had to beg you to stay; if anything, you had to beg him to kick you out because there was no way you would willingly leave his place and his warmth by your own choice.

“But I will have to go,” you added, verbalizing the sentence he secretly wished to hear but wouldn’t voice it. “Since my parents are waiting for me.” You didn’t give two damns about your parents. You really, really didn’t. But Baekhyun did. So you should, too.

Baekhyun caressed your hip bone, his hand sliding over your tummy where he tickled you, causing you to squirm once again under his touch. “I will meet you later, if you want,” he said, smiling when he saw your lips widely stretched in a silent laugh. “We can go to the coffee shop and be a little productive.”

You groaned, hiding your face in his chest again. Baekhyun let his hand slide over your back, enjoying the warmth your skin was emitting. “I don’t want to study. I want to cuddle you and kiss you and just feel you.”

Baekhyun’s chuckle was quiet but so handsome. He kissed your neck lovingly, puckering his lips three, four times. His lips were so smooth and soft; you wished you could stop the time now and live in the moment forever. “You felt me the whole night, didn’t you?” he rasped.

“Besides,” you added and leaned back a bit to look at his affectionate gaze. “We have some free time now before university starts.” His messy hair was falling over his eyes and you hummed, sliding your fingers through the strands, brushing them back and revealing his forehead. “Let’s make the most out of that. Just you and me.”

The air in the room felt warm. Whether it was from the activities you did the whole night or because you simply couldn’t not blush under his hooded eyes, you wouldn’t know. But when he leaned in to kiss you, unable to hold back any longer, you knew it was simply Baekhyun’s presence that was keeping you hot inside. With his hand on your naked skin, with his tongue teasing your lips or just a simple smile was what kept you burning hot, passion swallowing you and blinding you at the same time. If you were to keep walking, it was because of him. Thanks to him.

There were no cars parked in front of your house as you typed in the code for the tall wooden gate. Usually, there was some guest present but it was unusually peaceful. It almost made you excited because you naively believed your parents wouldn’t be home. Them not being home equaled time to yourself and more time to think through how you would approach the upcoming (dreader) discussion.

Stupid marriage, you thought unhappily as you entered the house. Making a beeline towards the kitchen, you were surprised yet again to find it empty. Wasn't it almost lunch time? Where were the maids? And the cooks?

It was all too strange which made you walk around, what was an obviously empty, house in order to find someone. Sure, your house was huge, and getting easily lost in it was a common issue for guests who were not hosted well, but this was beyond everything you expected.

Making the final decision to check your father’s office, you stopped in front of the sturdy wooden door. No sounds were coming from there, but the wood was too thick anyways. Clearing your throat gently, you opened the door and walked in the spacious room. It was also vacant, his chair turned to the side as if someone stood up from it in a hasty manner. Some documents were scattered around his otherwise well-organized table, so there wasn't anything out of ordinary until you felt a presence behind you, and you turned. You let out a shocked gasp when you saw your mother’s strict, emotionless face while standing straight with her arms crossed on her chest. She was, as per usual, well-dressed, her make-up one shade too light for her darker skin making her seem almost lifeless. You shuddered, but before you could react, she snapped.

“Do you like what you see? Empty house, no maids to run around you nor your family to welcome you?”

This time, you were really startled by her words. “What?”

“This is what will happen if you continue disobeying us, dear daughter. There won't be anyone to tend to your needs, no one to cook for you, to clean for you, not even me and your father will be there if you continue meeting that boy.”

You snorted, disbelief written all of your face as you sent daggers with your eyes. She dared to attack and mention Baekhyun again? “What is wrong with you-”

“Where were you last night until now?”

Scrambling to compose your still shocked state, you muttered: “You know where I was.”

She let out a humorless laugh and you noticed her jaw clenching. “What do you think you are doing? What were you even doing?” She reached out to the collar of your dress and yanked it sideways, revealing your collarbones along with your shoulder. Even though you didn't see exactly what she was looking at, you knew very well what she found there. You felt your heart jump in fear.

“Fooling around with him in bed?” she grumbled and snapped her cold eyes at you. “Letting him mark you? You little bitch.” The back of her hand landed with your cheek, the sting bringing tears to your eyes as your head snapped to the side, your hair covering half of your face from the strong blow. “How stupid must you be to be this irresponsible?!”

You held the abused cheek, biting your lip hard to prevent you from letting out a sob. You turned at her. “How dare you! I told you I will not comply and let that other man touch me-”

Her hand landed again on your cheek; the other one. “Wrong answer.”

You stepped away from her before she could hit you again, now letting the tears fall from your eyes. “You're crazy, mother,” you whispered, “you and father are both crazy.”

“That other man is your future husband,” she seethed, making a menacing step closer to you which prompted you to step back. “And he won't accept you cheating behind his back with some kid-”

“Stop talking about him like he is a no one!” you screeched loudly, losing your calm, surprising your mother and yourself in the process. Seeing your mother was finally silenced, you added: “He is the one I love, mum! I already said I will marry the guy, but you cannot take Baekhyun away from me! He is the only good thing I have in my life,” you cried. Your tears were scorching hot on your already reddened cheeks, just like Baekhyun's warmth that you were supposed to leave behind.

“The only good thing?” she repeated, disgusted. “After everything we have provided for you - you always had food and luxury! The least you can do to repay us is to do as we say!” she shouted, swishing her hands in the air. “I didn't even tell you off when you kept bringing bad grades home. I didn't bother. After all, you went to a useless, regular high school with no reputation. But right now, when I am telling you to do as I say, you decide to go against me?! I won't tolerate it! You will break up with him, and you will marry Mr Kwon. I made arrangements already, and he won’t impregnate you until you are done with university.”

Your gasp was loud, overwhelming the both of you, but your mother was faster to brush it off and continue with her nonsense. Her words were like a cut of a dagger; precise, because she knew your weak points, and very painful, because her goal was to wound you and eventually destroy you, leaving you in pain that would make you surrender to her orders.

“Impregnate?” you finally let out, voice trembling. “What the actual hell! I TOLD YOU. I am not letting him touch me.”

“Well,” she pressed an ugly, wrinkly smile, “you will have to. We need an heir. A boy.”

Sick. You were sick to your stomach at the idea of Mr Kwon smiling at you, let alone touch you at your most private parts and let him take you. The idea was maddening, and you desperately wanted to pull at your hair, hoping it would be a good enough sign for your mother to understand you didn't want to be part of an arranged marriage.

“Mum,” you whimpered finally, letting more tears fall as you connected your hands in front of your chest, pleading. “Mum, please. Don't do this. I will… I will do anything else you want me to, but please… You can't simply let him sleep with me.”

She scoffed, rolling her eyes. “You're acting as if you haven't been bedded already,” she said through gritted teeth. She was so disgusted by you, you couldn't help but take the hurt. Family was supposed to support you, be warm and kind and helpful, but her and your father were anything but. However, it never ceased to hurt you; the way she looked impersonal towards you, and right now, disgusted. As if you were some trash; someone unworthy of love and understanding.

“Please,” you whispered, closing your eyes for a moment.

“Wash up,” she grumbled resolutely before her eyes fell on the still exposed shoulder, “and hide that stupid mark with some make-up. Mr Kwon will be over for dinner-”

“NO!” you screeched, stomping your foot. “I WILL NOT MEET HIM!”

“Unless you want me to beat you up until your pretty-for-nothing face is marked just like he marked your neck, then I advise you to go. Wash. Up.” She turned around and walked away with resolute steps.

There was a crack within you; it literally felt like a knife slashing through your weak organ that was your heart.

“You’re cruel, mother!” you shouted after her, despite her not paying you any more attention, and you ran out of the office and up the wide staircase that would lead you to the only place you could hide in. Your room.

Shaky hands grabbed at the hair tie, yanking it out of your hair and throwing it across the spacious room. It was followed by your dress, also thrown to the other side while you stomped to the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind you. Its surface was cold on the skin of your naked back as you slid down, sobbing.

How many times have you been in this position already? How many times have you cried like this, despair pooling in the pit of your stomach, hoping, praying that things would somehow magically turn over and you’d feel some sort of relief? That relief never came and your misery would only worsen. Maybe it was exactly because of your high hopes, you thought as your sobbing slowly ceased, leaving you with only quiet whimpers and a throbbing headache. Maybe it was because, at the end of the day, you’d have Baekhyun who would bring out all the best and kindest and the most positive parts out of your suffering soul.

The thought of him made you only weep again, but you became determined as well. For him, you’d do anything. Anything.

He said to obey.

And you would.

Just before the main guest would arrive, your mother pushed a familiar pink gift bag into your hand. “You didn’t even open this ever since you decided to grace us with your presence,” she pressed through her gritted teeth, holding back from raising her voice. As much as she wished to smack you, she also didn’t want to cause a ruckus just before Mr Kwon would arrive. She needed you to look your best, which you did. “Open it and make sure to mention the gift,” she ordered and took a sharp look-over at your dressed up figure.

As promised, you hid all the hickeys Baekhyun left on you blinded by his passion and desire last night. The polite black dress was hugging your curves just in the gentlest ways, not too much but still leaving a good image of what you were hiding underneath. The colour of your stockings was of your skin, but with a glistening touch, making your legs look more desirable. Hair politely combed, wavy at the ends and tucked behind your ears. Perfect.

“Finally you know how to dress up properly to your age,” mumbled your mother. When you didn’t respond and averted your gaze to the ground, she hesitated before heaving out a sigh. “He’ll be here soon,” she turned around to leave your room. “Prepare.”

You were surprised when your mother shut the door quietly behind herself, giving you the necessary time to actually get ready and collect your thoughts.

The bag, just as yesterday, felt heavy in your fingers and you decided to finally take out the small, cream-coloured box, most probably promising a pricey gift. Sitting down at the edge of your bed, you quickly opened it to find a pretty set of earrings and a necklace. Earrings consisted of two pearls while the necklace was a simple silver necklace with a single pearl in the middle.

Noticing their unusual shape, you could tell right away that they were real pearls. Each piece of irregular shape made the actual stone throw all kinds of colors of the rainbow. It was beautiful, it really was, but not something you’d expect from someone you had never met. It strengthened the idea that what was about to go down in the future was, in fact, real. He was pursuing you.

Sighing tiredly, you felt your eyes burning up once again but was abruptly stopped when your phone vibrated on the vanity where you left it. Quickly moving to take it, you instantly smiled when you saw Baekhyun’s picture and his caller ID on display.

“Baby,” you sighed breathily, eager to hear his voice.

First you heard his handsome chuckle before he spoke: “My princess. Just wanted to check on you. I told you to text me once you’re home,” he scolded gently.

You bit your lip before quickly releasing it, remembering you had lipstick on. “Sorry I got… busy,” you murmured eventually. Not sure whether to tell him about the dinner, you decided to keep quiet. If he heard your uncertainty, he’d know something was up right away.

He hummed. “There was no trouble, right?” His voice was careful, hesitant. He always trusted you but he also knew you would lie if he asked.

You lied anyway. “Of course. You know I’m not that easily breakable, right? There is no need to worry, Baekhyun.”

He sighed. “I always worry about you.” And about your family hurting you. He kept that to himself though. “But as long as I hear your voice and know your fine, it’s more than enough.”

You closed your eyes, desperately wishing you could be with him, in his bed, while he studied and you’d observe him. Anything would be better than the situation you were in now. “I miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” he was fast to reply. “Always. I missed you even before you left this morning.”

You giggled, covering your mouth even though no one saw you. “I’ll gladly sneak out tonight.”

“No. Stay home. Don’t want you getting into trouble-“

“You know I’d do it even with you disapproving.”

“Oh, I know you would, sweetheart. I know.”

“I’d do anything for you, Baekhyun,” you whispered, “in a heartbeat.”

He was silent for a moment. You weren’t sure why he wasn’t replying, but then again, your words bore quite a powerful meaning. “And I’d do anything to protect you and keep you happy.”

Burning tears came to life when you heard his low voice, sending shocks down your body. “Then never leave me.”

Silence again.

“Baekhyun,” you muttered, “promise me you won’t leave me.”

Why wasn’t he replying as fast as he did just a few moments ago? Were you asking for too much? Were you crossing boundaries? That made you scoff. You and him had such a strong and intimate relationship, there was no space for any boundaries. Your relationship seemed to be limitless.

“I won’t leave you, love,” was his answer finally. “I love you too fucking much for me to leave you.”

“Then that’s enough,” you sighed shakily, knowing it was time for you to hang up and face the dreaded. “As long as I know you love me and won’t leave me, all will be well.”

The silence in the dining room was one of the worst things your life had put you through. The chewing sounds, clinking of the cutlery along with slurping were the only noises that you heard physically, while your mind was about to explode with your thoughts.

Mr Kwon was sitting directly opposite you, to your misfortune, while your parents were seated in their usual spots, your father being at the head of the table. It was almost the absolute end of you when the servers put octopuses on the table as the main dish. Shooting them a horrified glare, they could only widen their eyes at you, silently asking for your forgiveness when they knew octopuses made you puke your guts out. Just the sight triggered your gag reflex and you ended up swallowing the rice through the wrong pipe, causing you to start a spree of aggressive coughing. Definitely not lady-like.

“Oh my, look at you,” chided your mother who was next to you, tapping your back with good enough power. “You eat too fast, darling,” she said knowingly and when you turned to glare at her, she only chuckled, taking in your red face.

“Maybe have octopuses,” suggested Mr Kwon with a chuckle as he reached for one right away. “They certainly won't make you suffocate.”

Your presence alone is suffocating enough, you thought bitterly but made sure to break a smile to show respect even though it was killing you. Quickly reaching for a jar with water, you wanted to pour yourself some very much needed liquid when you saw the man's hand in your line of vision, and he poured you water.

“Eat carefully, miss,” he murmured, giving you the slightest of honest smiles.

You bowed your head in gratitude before gulping down. It gave you the relief you desperately seeked, but the sight of the octopuses was creating an uncomfortable bulge in your stomach.

“So, now that we enjoyed the main dishes, we shall talk about some business, what do you say, Mr Kwon?” suggested your father in a friendly manner, connecting his fingers as he rested his elbows on the table.

Mr Kwon nodded. “Oh, yes, we shall do that. The meal was terrific, by the way.”

“Thank you, I will make sure to tell the kitchen staff,” smiled brightly your mother, hiding her grin behind her hand. You tried not to shudder at the tense, over-polite atmosphere, but on the other hand you were dying to find out more about your fate. With Baekhyun on your mind, you braced yourself, ready to fight for whatever was to come.

Your father gave you a brief glance before facing the expectant Mr Kwon. “Well, I suppose we should set a wedding date. Given we discussed most of the business part, we should now focus on you and our daughter.”

“Yes, yes. I would like to suggest marriage once she enters university,” proposed Mr Kwon importantly and you felt blood leaving your face immediately. “As you know, I would also like to get to know her better and I believe that if we will start our marriage early on, we both can earn ourselves some valuable time before starting a family. I also do not want her to steer away from me too much.”

No. No, no, no. “Actually, may I say-”

“No, you may not,” muttered your mother, squeezing your thigh under the table. She quickly looked at Mr Kwon who had a questioning look. “Would you like the ceremony when her first semester starts? You see, she is a good student, so I'd like her not to steer away from her studies too much.”

Surprised, you stole a glance at your mother, but she was facing your future husband. Your heartbeat was frantic in your chest and you swore you would pass out at the idea of your mother trying to protect you in some twisted manner, despite her fighting you like a wild bull.

“What do you suggest, then?” asked Mr Kwon, his attention fully on your mother.

She took a deep breath and her hand left your thigh, leaving behind a warm, but uncomfortable feeling on your skin. “Marriage after graduation.”

The man in question raised his eyebrows slowly, thinking over the suggested idea. Meticulously, he scrutinized your mother before his eyes fell on your wavering gaze. It was almost scorching, and you couldn't help but look down at your lap where your hands were politely connected. Noticing the sickeningly white skin of your knuckles, you didn't realize you were squeezing them together in order to fight the nerves.

“Alright,” he rasped eventually, causing you to raise your head in hope. “Under some conditions, though.”

Your heart died a little bit at that, but it didn't matter. You had four years ahead. Four years of freedom. With Baekhyun. “I am to do what my initial plan was,” he started, “and that is to get to know my future wife well. I do respect her needs, however I would like to visit her on various occasions and take her out, too. She shouldn't be a newbie to the house where I live in, so I demand to have at least one night with her-”

“Oh, Mr Kwon,” chimed in your mother nonchalantly, while your father shot her a warning look, “let me remind you that we would like our daughter to finish her bachelor degree on time. Which means we wouldn't want unwelcome pregnancies or such.”

Your throat went dry and you almost whimpered at the horrific idea.

“Are you suggesting no physical contact until after marriage?”

“Excuse me,” you said in a tiny tone, withering under the adults' strict gazes, “but this is my life and my body we talk about here.” You bravely looked at Mr Kwon's face. “As much as I understand and respect your request, I do not wish to do anything more until we know each other well enough,” you hesitated, before adding, “until I feel ready. You know yourself that I am still young and have a desire to live a little bit before I will settle down with you.”

“By living a little bit I hope you do not mean finding other boyfriends,” he cut in, the slightest of scoffs tinting his voice. “From this moment on, you are to tend to me only.”

“Actually-”

“Actually,” this time your mother cut in, her hand back on your thigh, wordlessly silencing you, “we understand your request.” She paused and you held your breath. “We agree, of course. She shouldn't be seeing anyone else besides you.”

“And has she been seeing anyone else before?” quipped Mr Kwon, leaning back in his chair, his stance somehow lazy. “Does she have experience? Has she been bedded before?”

You winced and your head snapped to your father, your eyes pleading with him to do something.

“I'd rather not…” your father trailed off, obvious discomfort on his face, “talk about this. We promised you our daughter and we are willing to make the wedding ceremony once she graduates in four years. Until then, you are to pursue her,” he decided, authority now dripping from his voice. “Feel free to contact her, but our conditions are as I stated just now. Marriage after graduation. Otherwise, we comply with your requests to be with her. She won't be seeing anyone else. Do not worry, Mr Kwon.”

Mr Kwon was watching you and that scared you. Was the fact that you were in a relationship written all over your face? You hoped not, even though you desperately wanted to tell him that yes, indeed, you had a boyfriend. You already had someone who occupied every possible space in your heart and in your mind.

“Alright,” said the guest, “may I suggest a little talk face to face here with our young miss?”

“But of course!” agreed your mother without hesitation and in no time, her and your father were gone, both of them shooting you warning glares. If only they could support you for once. Was that too much to ask for? Though you had to be honest. You were satisfied that you still had something you could hold for yourself.

“Miss,” Mr Kwon snapped you out of your thoughts. He stood up and walked over to you, motioning for you to stand up as well. You hastily did, quickly adjusting your skirt, which didn't go unnoticed by his sharp eyes. Feeling your cheeks reddening, you didn't look up.

He was quiet for a little while longer before softly muttering: “My gift looks very pretty on you. I have to say, I feel baffled that you decided to wear the pearls for me.”

Your breath hitched in your throat, but you still refused to look up at him. It was anything but for him.

“I assume you must be startled by the events, but I assure you I won't harm you. In the adult world, it is only normal to follow natural instincts though,” he murmured again as he made a step closer. “And you are definitely a breath-takingly beautiful young woman.” Suppressing the shivers, you nodded to show you were listening. He chuckled lowly. “No need to be shy around me. I prefer my women brave and confident. Like they know what they want.”

You raised your head now, reciprocating the eye contact. “In that case - I am still eighteen, Mr Kwon. I would appreciate it if you respect that.”

“I didn't even do anything,” he laughed again, shaking his head, taking your words as a joke. “But I like it. Okay. You got me. I will ask your parents for your telephone number and from now on,” he paused and leaned in a little closer, his strong cologne hitting your nose, “we shall deal with everything privately. Just the two of us.” He leaned back, checking your face for some reaction. You were shaken. “Alright?”

You nodded, wanting it to be quickly over. “Alright.”

“I'll make sure no one else will roam around you, miss. From today on, you are mine.”

It was yet another of the many times that you cried in your bed. Guilty feelings eating you away, the creeping sense of disgust at everything that you had to listen to and become part of sooner than later.

You were trying to think your situation over - how you could trick Mr Kwon to make him believe you weren't seeing anyone. In a way, you were thankful your mother and father never mentioned you already having a boyfriend as much as you wanted to shout it to the whole world. It was better to keep Baekhyun a secret which was basically one step to being in a relationship you didn't want to be. Baekhyun already became a forbidden fruit and you wondered what would happen if Mr Kwon found out.

You never told Baekhyun what was the deal between your parents and Mr Kwon. As much as he knew you were secretive and he tried to be the same Baekhyun as before, you couldn’t help the lurking feeling of your relationship's dynamics suddenly changing.

It shifted.

Unfortunately, in the wrong direction.

It’s been almost four years now that you’ve been attending university, meaning the sacred time to part was coming up, and you saw your boyfriend less and less. Even if the weather was nice and all you’ve asked was five minutes of his precious time, Baekhyun slowly but surely refused to give it to you. He would make sure to make it up later but the slightest hint of distance was palpable in his eyes and his touches.

In the beginning, you still enjoyed each other as much as you used to. He would bring you along to parties and show everyone you were together. You would bring him along to your get-togethers and make sure all the ladies knew he was yours. You slept at his place whenever you could and you were still just as crazy about each other as you used to be.

It was only once Mr Kwon started to take you out, asking for dinner dates and sometimes even making unannounced visits, was when your relationship started to break. You hated that word dearly; to break. You hated to use that word in the same sentence with Baekhyun's name. But you got the hunch that Baekhyun was suspicious. He knew something was up, he was not dumb. Suddenly, it was you rejecting his advances, it was you busy and with little time to spare. So you made sure he wouldn't get the hint and masked everything. Mr Kwon was not allowed to give you unannounced visits and you had to meet him somewhere far away from campus (it was convenient since he always treated you to expensive, tasteless food in Gangnam).

Over those few years, you and Baekhyun developed a routine; at the beginning of each semester, both of you exchanged your timetables. But in your final year, despite you knowing about Baekhyun's whereabouts, he would either stay later in school or hang out with his classmates. Thankfully, he took you many times with him - to lunches and dinners and get-togethers. Many of his friends there had girlfriends and you were never surprised that Baekhyun managed to win over almost everyone in his year. Because even if you were there as his girlfriend, his hand on your thigh to prove it, there were still so many girls, younger and older, swallowing him up with dark, hungry eyes.

Just where did the good old days go? In the good old days, you would be inseparable. There was no one who could stay between you two, even if it was your evil parents. He would kiss you, you would hug him, he would caress you and you would lay your head on his shoulder. You’d sneak out to see him, and he would create a new, safe home for you even if it meant just for a night. You risked so much to be with him; even now when you were under a scrutinizing watch of Mr Kwon, you’d always go and try to see Baekhyun.

So why was Baekhyun acting like this? With every passing day, he would drift away from you and you felt like you were trying to grasp onto him desperately, preventing him from leaving your side. Baekhyun was always by your side. He belonged there.

You were in your final year now, the beginning of a brand new, and last, semester when you decided to sign up for a fashion design class. You weren’t sure why you did it; the constant doodling as a way to get rid of your negative emotions, you grew to love grabbing a pencil and just let the sharp tip of it slide on the crisp surface of the paper. Fashion was something you always had to excel at given your reputation so when you found yourself sketching some pretty lingerie, you decided it wouldn’t be a bad move to attend a class that you actually liked, unlike the rest.

“But why does it have to be in the evening?” whined Baekhyun who was walking you to the seminar room. His hair was messy and it wasn’t because of your fingers. Apparently he had been in the library since 6am.

You sighed, and hugged your books closer to your chest, the chilly autumn evening catching you unprepared. You loved the deep red dress you wore today, but not only you were cold, but the heels were killing your feet too. “You’re always busy, Baekhyun. Why is it suddenly so difficult for you to accept that I will be busy one evening out of seven?”

He went silent and you knew you hit a sensitive spot. “You’re right.”

That made you feel… disappointed. He wouldn’t even try to fight anymore.

“Let’s talk after your class,” he suggested when you stopped in front of the classroom. There was some movement inside, most probably the professor preparing the materials for the seminar.

Baekhyun’s words left you feeling uneasy. “About what?”

He looked at you but his gaze was unreadable. He didn’t smile but didn’t frown either, until you saw the slightest clench of his jaw before he relaxed it. “About us.”

You instantly had tears in your eyes but you pressed your lips together, praying you wouldn’t start wailing now. Despite that, you shivered. “Maybe another time,” you tried.

“Sweetheart,” he sighed, running his hand through his hair. “I really need to talk to you.”

“So when you want to talk to me I need to have time but when I was chasing you the past years, you couldn’t even give me five goddamn minutes of your precious time!”

He was taken aback at the raise of your voice but didn’t comment on it, nor did he act upon it. “I think you know that we have too many unresolved issues.”

“I don’t want to solve them,” you replied stubbornly.

He frowned. “What? What’s the matter with you?” he asked, exasperated. “You’ve been acting so strange,” he added, saying your name with so much seriousness it made you shiver again. “All I want is to talk.”

“But you will break up with me,” you said, voice low now and your chin trembling. “I know it. And I don’t want to.”

“No,” he was fast to whisper, shaking his head as he stepped closer to you, “I don’t want to break up with you, angel,” he whispered into your ear now, his hands gently cradling your head as he hugged you to him.

You whimpered, dropping your books so you could squeeze his slim waist and hide your face in his chest. His sweater had a pleasant scent of his detergent and it made you feel instantly at home. “Then what is it,” you gritted your teeth to prevent yourself from sobbing.

He sighed, knowing how he must have shattered you over the time. He grew distant, he was aware of that. But Baekhyun was also a perfectionist. He had to excel in classes, he had to make sure he knew what he was doing in order to become a qualified doctor as he always dreamed about. However, him being meticulous with his studies made him lose someone who was very special to him - you. “I miss you,” he whispered. “I just want to make sure we are in the clear. I want to spend more time with you. But I want to talk.”

“I’ve been missing you for so long,” you mumbled, ignoring the few students who were passing by and entering your classroom. He had a sad look on his face and you weren’t sure you wanted to know why. “I’ll come to your place. Will the other guys be out?”

He grasped your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. “I don’t know. I don’t care. Just head straight to my place, alright?” he said, attempting to smile.

Baekhyun was sharing an apartment with his friends just across the campus so it was convenient for him and for you. Even though they could be annoying sometimes, they knew not to play around you too much, given how ignorant you were towards anyone that wasn’t a Byun Baekhyun.

You nodded and Baekhyun hummed in acknowledgment, leaning in to kiss your forehead. You sighed, satisfied.

“Enjoy your class,” he murmured, his lips still brushing your skin. “I'll be waiting for you.”

Before he could let go of your hand and walk away, you pulled him towards you, ignoring his questioning gaze and stood on your tiptoes, pressing your lips together. You felt him heave out a soft breath before he cradled your face and angled you up to have better access as he teased you with his tongue.

Someone cleared their throat out of nowhere and you gasped, disattaching from Baekhyun's lips a smooch that made you blush. He let go of you when he zoomed in on someone and you turned to find a young professor standing in the doorway to the seminar room. “Are you joining my class?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

Quickly bowing to him, you nodded, apologizing as you made your way to the classroom. Before the doors could completely close, you looked at Baekhyun who gave you a supportive smile.

You could smell cigarettes in the corridor as you stood in front of Baekhyun's apartment door. It wasn't the nicest building; some weird people lurking here and there, but you knew he worked hard to earn the place so you never told him how you actually felt about the place.

You typed in the code, letting yourself enter and quickly took off your heels, chasing the very much needed relief in your aching feet.

“You came.” Baekhyun appeared from his room, a big grey hoodie and black pants looking extra comfortable and cuddly on him.

He walked over to you and this time he initiated the small kiss. “How was class?” he asked, taking your bag from your hand as he moved to the kitchen. He was about to lift it up when your sketchbook fell out, the pages messily opening and splattering on the floor.

“It went very well,” you answered, watching him slowly pick up the sketch book, his eyes drinking in what he was seemingly missing out on the past year. Your sketches.

“Did you…” he trailed off, swallowing before looking up at you, “did you draw this? Did you come up with this?”

“Well, I had to present something to the teacher so that I wouldn't look too lost in his fashion class,” you smiled cheekily, sensing the unease Baekhyun was suddenly full of. He let his eyes follow you as you stepped towards him, taking the sketchbook from his frozen hand. “This is my personal favourite,” you said in a low voice, turning the pages until there were no more left. The last page was the only sketch you didn't show to your professor. Baekhyun was silent, but his eyes were sharp. They flickered from your face to the lingerie sketches that you were showing him.

Slowly, he took a deep breath, eyes scanning the figure that was resembling yours unlike the regular ones that you sketched before, for anyone's eyes. This one was meant for Baekhyun's eyes only and he was assured of it when he saw the small “unlock, bbh” under the sketch.

You knew Baekhyun loved wearing black colours despite his favourite one being red. So you decided to combine the dark with a deep, sultry red that oozed sexiness and confidence. Lace was so thinly sketched, it almost seemed like your skin was tattered with it. You never liked wearing thongs, so you made sure the underwear would be comfortable for you, instead filling the space with lace and silk.

It was a luxurious piece that you were confident you could actually wear one day if you would be determined enough to bring it to life.

“You see,” you started when silence was too much to bear, the growing tension made you feel all sorts of strong emotions, “I made it like a game for you, Baekhyun.” You took his index finger and pointed it at the paper where your left shoulder bra strap was drawn. “You won't unlock me until you find out one crucial point of this set. If you do, you'll unlock the entire outfit,” you told him, your voice low. “And what do I mean by unlock?” you asked, letting go of his finger and he looked at you from his side. “You'll get to see me in my whole glory. Just a simple click can give you access to everything that I am.”

Baekhyun was thinking about your words even though it had been a while since he spoke. Eventually, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to control something you weren't aware of. “Is this what you did in your class?”

You snorted a laugh. “No, Baekhyun. This is just for you. My present to you,” you smiled at the idea. “One day.”

“How can you be so fucking sexy inside and out?” he grumbled and with one arm swiftly brought you to his chest, his hand tightly gripping your waist. His eyes flickered all over your features, taking in the make-up and the red lipstick that you knew he adored so much. How could he let himself ignore you when you were a full meal, a huge prey for any man with bad and good intentions? How could he not appreciate you every single day and tell you that he loved you and wanted to make love to you every single time he saw you?

You smiled up at him and he lost it. Despite the trouble and negative tension he created, you still dared to smile at him?

He claimed your lips, catching you by surprise but you moaned instantly when you felt his hands drag downwards over your hips and bum until reaching the backside of your thighs. Both of you were so familiar with each other's actions, that Baekhyun didn't have to tell you to jump anymore. You did so without his order and when he had you in his arms, you felt him right at your center instantly. You gasped, reacting to his body as you tried to shimmy your middle over him and he grunted into the kiss.

“Jesus, what are you doing to me, woman,” he breathed, his lips glistening with your mixed saliva before cradling your cheek with one hand, bringing you in for another dirty kiss.

You whined, growing wet right away. Squeezing his waist with your legs, he clumsily put you on the counter, accidentally knocking over some cups, but neither of you cared. Baekhyun was kissing your jaw, slowly making his way to your ear into which he whispered: “I need to fuck you right now.” He bit your earlobe and you moaned, wanting to close your legs but his hands were already pushing them apart. Your dress hiked up to your hips, revealing your underwear and you fumbled with his pants, your hands already inside to bring him out. Upon touching him, you gasped, looking at your boyfriend. He was hard.

“It's what you do to me all the damn time,” he whispered, panting when he felt your light touch. “I told you years ago, didn't I?” he smirked and pushed your hand away, instead his hands grabbing you under your knees and yanking you to the edge so he could have better access. You whimpered, clenching around nothing when he pushed the crotch of your panties aside and felt his middle finger teasing you by letting it dip but not quite enter. “So wet,” he breathed, looking at your blushed face. “Let’s dive, shall we?” he murmured, grabbing himself. You circled your arms around his neck, face buried in his neck as you felt him poke you. Lubricating himself he made sure to spread your arousal all over your womanhood. You whimpered and he finally pushed in. Both of you moaned in unison, the stretch so pleasurable it made you almost see stars.

“Mmhhmm, you feel so good,” you moaned, closing your eyes and biting his earlobe. He was quick to reply when he set up a fast pace, chasing his release.

Both of you were panting, neither of you speaking as you were indulged in each other. Feeling the sweat prickling around your hairline, you kissed Baekhyun, who grunted, pushing extra deep and hitting your g-spot. You let go of the kiss with a smooch, moaning loudly into his mouth which he swallowed, his forehead pressed to yours. “Is it good? Am I making you feel good?” he breathed, puffs of air hitting your lips.

“Yes, yes, you do,” you exhaled harshly as he slowed down, circling his hips to make sure he was touching every corner of you. You arched your back, your head hitting the cupboards you forgot were behind you. Just like that, both of you were laughing like crazy, Baekhyun smiling widely as he kissed your exposed neck while still deep inside you.

You cursed, still giggling. Bringing your face back, you took his face into your hands and kissed him as he took himself out of you completely and then slammed back in right away.

“I’m so fucking close,” he whispered between messy kisses. “I swear I'm gonna cum right now, princess.”

You wanted to tell him to wait for you, but instead you lead him on. “Then cum.”

“Should I pull out?” The urgency of his voice as he kept thrusting into you made you momentarily dizzy. He felt so good. “No, don’t pull out,” you breathed and he groaned loudly, hiding his face in your chest as was his habit when he was releasing. Exactly then, you felt hot spurts pumping into you. You felt so full but the satisfaction was anywhere near. You chose not to act up on your frustration, instead deciding to enjoy seeing Baekhyun in a bliss.

“I don't remember when was the last time I came this hard,” he told you, stilling completely, his breath fanning your lips as he was slowly coming down from his high. After a few moments, he kissed you sweetly. “Sorry, baby. Let me-”

“No, don’t,” you said, the wetness leaking out of you and on the counter. His hand hovered above your bundle of nerves just above where he disappeared inside you. “It's fine.”

“But you didn’t cum,” he muttered, embarrassed. “Sorry… this is so ridiculous.”

“Don't be silly,” you said with a gentle tone and brushed his hair out of his sweaty forehead and leaned in to kiss it. “You're so gorgeous, Baekyhun,” you told him when he finally focused his shy gaze on you. In response, he squeezed your thighs he was holding onto the whole time. The iron grip eased up into a gentle hold. You were sure you would bruise but damn, you didn't care.

He smiled and that was your biggest present. His smile that was meant for you. “The one who is gorgeous is you. You made me cum so fast with just the idea of you wearing that lingerie… I'll make it up to you, I promise,” he whispered, kissing you again as he pulled out of you, once again causing you to moan at the friction.

Baekhyun cleaned up the mess quickly and sent you to wash up but before you could saunter off, he held your hand. “Stay over tonight,” he requested softly.

Feeling yourself smile even wider, you gratefully accepted.

After eating dinner, it was already too late, so both of you moved to Baekhyun's room, deciding to talk like you wanted to.

He lent you his clothes and you relished in the feeling of getting lost in his hoodie. When he lied down, he opened his arms for you to find comfort in and you were fast to jump at him, causing him to grunt at the impact which made you giggle.

“Are you trying to say I’m heavy!” you shrieked in mock anger, hitting his chest gently, and Baekhyun laughed.

“No, never,” he hummed when you settled in, resting your head on his chest. His heartbeat sounded a little irregular.

Your mood instantly deflated. “So,” you started, drawing circles on his pectoral with your finger. “What was it you wanted to talk about?”

He sighed gently and you felt his breath on your forehead. “I don’t know how to begin.”

“From the start.”

Baekhyun clicked his tongue at your reply and you smiled though it didn’t quite reach your eyes. “You’re a teasing little thing, aren’t you, my love.”

My love.

If he called you his love it meant he wouldn’t break up with you, right?

“I just feel like …” he trailed off, taking a moment to collect his thoughts. “You’re in your final year.”

That sentence spoke volumes to you. The meaning behind it meant only one thing and it was that only thing you’d been trying to fight against and refuse to accept. Your time with Baekhyun was almost up.

“Won’t you say something?” he asked softly when there was no answer from you.

This time you were the one who sighed and gently pushed yourself out of his grasp, to sit up facing him.

He mirrored you and sat opposite you. “Baby, what is going to happen?”

“I don’t know,” you murmured, lowering your head. “I mean-“ you looked up. “I won’t leave you, that’s all I know for sure.”

Baekhyun wasn’t satisfied with your answer. After all, you had the same answer years ago. He called your name. “We cannot do this forever, you know? Both of us deserve to know where we stand. It’s weird that you’ve been promised to that man but there is no news about when you are supposed to get married?” he rumbled though his voice wasn’t accusative.

Biting your lip, you avoided his eyes again by looking down.

“You know stuff, don’t you.”

You grit your teeth.

“What aren’t you telling me, hm?” He waited for a moment and when you still refused to talk, he took a deep breath. “I can’t believe you’ve known stuff and not tell me!”

This time, he sounded angry. “No, Baek, it’s not like that! I- yes, I’m supposed to be marrying him after I graduate but-“

“There is no but. There is only a period. You are marrying him after you graduate. Period.”

Your heart broke into two. Baekhyun was frowning, hurt flashing in his eyes as his jaw pulsed with how hard he was clenching it. His lips, those lips, were set into a hard line and there was no way to make him look happy like he once used to when he was with you.

“Baekhyun,” you tried, voice thin, “I already told you I’m not letting you go.”

“You seriously think about yourself only, don’t you,” he responded coldly, disbelief painting his voice. “You really don’t care what it means for me to sneak behind some rich dude who can give you anything you point at! I have my own pride. I can’t bear to share you with someone-“

“Baekhyun, I won’t let him touch me! I won’t let him do anything! You won’t be sharing me with anyone! My heart belongs to you and you know it,” you said, tears burning up in your eyes. “I love you so much,” you whispered before your voice could break.

Baekhyun was holding back, you could tell. His lips quivered but he didn’t make any effort to reach out for you. His eyes glistened. “Don’t marry him.”

You groaned inwardly. “You know I can’t do that.”

“So you’ve been going behind your parents the entire time, seeing me despite their protests and when I ask you not to marry him, you suddenly want to comply?”

“It’s for business,” you reminded him, “I didn’t choose this myself if that’s what you’ve been thinking.”

“I don’t care! I’ll give you everything. I’ll give you more than he can ever give you,” he said hurriedly and you let out a small gasp because Baekhyun was usually anything but desperate. He was the collected one, but now he was anything but.

“I’ll never leave you,” you promised shuffling to him, taking his face in your cold hands. “Please know that, Baekhyun. I won’t let him do anything. It’s just a status. That's all.”

His eyes were frantically flickering between yours, as if searching for something more than there was. “How can you just marry him when you barely ever saw him?”

And now was the time where you could start feeling guilty. It was on you. This was your fault and given how well Baekhyun knew you, he would read right into it. It got confirmed when he pulled away from you, your hands dropping.

“What else aren't you telling me?” he said in a low voice now completely withdrawing away from you and pushing himself up against the headboard.

“Baekhyun-”

“Just tell me already!”

You winced, quickly shutting your mouth. “We sometimes meet because he… eh, he just wants to get to know me better. That's it, he just asks me questions an-and I answer,” you replied shakily, brushing your hair behind your ear. “There is nothing, I swear. I deserve to know what kind of man I am marrying, too,” you added, looking up at your boyfriend whose gaze was set somewhere behind you.

“Has this been happening the entire time?” he asked quietly.

“Since the start of the uni.”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Fucking awesome. Congratulations.”

“Baekhyun,” you said, this time strictly. “What the hell is wrong with you? I've been begging to meet you the whole past year and you always found some bullshit excuse for studying and actually you know what? Who knows what you'd been doing during those times!” you exclaimed, the idea of him being with someone else sending you into a rage.

“The fuck? As if I would cheat on you!” he shouted back, sending daggers your way. “I've been in a relationship with someone who was never supposed to be mine! Tell me, sweetcheeks, how does that sound to you? I'm saving myself for you while I know the entire time that I'll be on the loose end. I'm the pathetic one. I am the one who will lose. Not you,” he said in a menacing tone. “So before you start to throw shit at me, I would look in the mirror if I were you.”

“Byun Baekhyun!” you shouted.

He raised an eyebrow. “What. You don't like to hear the truth? Well, this is it. And I have lost my mind, finally. I've been too goddamn blinded by your hope when I knew the whole time it would be fruitless. I cannot do this anymore!”

By then you were sobbing. The last sentence sent you into fits of cries that you couldn't suppress no matter how hard you tried, and it hurt. Byun Baekhyun's words hurt like hell. Hiding your face in your hands, you felt the wetness of your tears pooling in your palms, hoping he would stop being angry with you and just take you in his arms and take his words back.

It didn't happen.

Slowly, you moved your hands away to see him stare at you, hard gaze, lips sealed tightly. “Baby,” you tried, reaching for him. More tears fell from your eyes but you didn't care anymore. He had seen you cry so many times and he was always there to comfort you. This time you were crying because of him and he wouldn't even move a finger for you. “Baby, please.”

“You said you deserve to know him better, too,” he said. “So it is that important to you - that you need to know him.”

“Of course,” you replied with a nasal voice, “what if he is a psychopath.”

He laughed bitterly. “Right. What if he is. How the fuck would you know - you are marrying him anyway! So why is it so important to you to let him get to know you? And you him?”

“It's just the way the deal went, okay?”

“No, it's not okay,” he spat. “You're going against your own word. “You told me there would be nothing happening until you graduate and you were with him behind my back.”

It was your turn to scoff now, though your face was splotchy. “Because you were waiting for me so much!”

“Don't you dare turn this against me,” he muttered in a low tone which left you shocked. This was the first time Baekhyun used that kind of tone with you. In fact, this was your first time fighting this ugly. “This is about you. About your fucking family. About them wanting to destroy us!”

“And it's obviously working!” You threw your hands up. “Just look at you now! You're doing exactly what they want you to be doing! They so desperately wish for you to hurt me so I could dump you,” you shouted, more tears rolling down your hot cheeks. “I guess they were right after all.”

“Right in what,” he snapped again, glaring at you.

You stood up, unable to keep fighting with him. He watched you wordlessly as you picked up your bag where you had your school books. “You're just using me. I guess I was just money to you as well!” You were seething as you yanked his door open and rushed straight for the door.

Sensing someone in the kitchen, you stopped abruptly for a moment, seeing Park Chanyeol staring at you in shock while he took in your state.

You shook your head, not bothering to say hi to him as you went to grab your shoes just to realize you came in heels. “Fuck,” you muttered. Well, Baekhyun's vans would have to do. Grabbing them, you tied both shoes tightly so you wouldn't fall as you rushed to grab the door when you felt a hand grab your wrist instead.

You looked back, making out Baekhyun's features through tears. “Let go,” you snapped, trying to shake him off.

“Where are you going this late?!”

“Anywhere is better than here with you! I cannot stay with you, Baekhyun!” you shouted, finally yanking him off harshly enough so his hand slipped.

You slammed the door shut and Baekyhun was met with silence. Throwing a single, helpless gaze at his friend was enough for Chanyeol to nod and move. “I'll go after her,” he reassured Baekhyun who seemed to be on the verge of mental breakdown.

Baekhyun just nodded, watching Chanyeol leave and hoping you wouldn't actually break up with him.

You were marching down the dark street, ignoring the anxiety creeping in from the silent, empty streets. They were eerie and scary and you hated walking down them at such a late hour but there was no way you could stay at Baekhyun's.

Fast steps brought you back to the present and your heart almost jumped out of your rib cage when you felt someone taking your wrist again. Hope spiked up, expecting to see Baekhyun but it was Park Chanyeol.

He turned you to him gently, little out of breath from trying to catch up with you. “You sure walk fast,” he commented.

He let go of your wrist and you sighed, looking at him with expectation. “What do you want, Park?”

“I just wanted to make sure you're fine,” he said rather shyly.

“I'm just fine,” you insisted, “I will go home now. Go back, it's late.”

“I'll take you home,” he said and to prove a point he clinked with his car keys. “Though it's not the best car out there, it will do the job.”

You rolled your eyes. “I always knew all of you were judging me for my status. And don't bother. I know you're only doing this because of Baekhyun. Well, you don't need to do this.”

“He would skin me alive,” he whispered, horrified. “And he is now too good with the scalpel. I wouldn’t dare.”

“I don't want your help unless it's something you actually want to do, Park Chanyeol,” you muttered through gritted teeth, feeling another wave of tears threatening to spill. “You just made it worse. Leave.”

“It’s late.”

“I don't care. I need to be alone right now.”

“For your information, we all know how much he cherishes you,” he started. “Whenever he would reject you, he would study but not really focus. He keeps talking only about you. We don’t judge you for money but for how much you occupy our space even if you aren't there. That dude is just bewitched by you and I don't know how you managed to do it, to be honest. He is the coldest guy to any other opposite sex beside you.”

“What are you trying to say, Park Chanyeol?”

He sighed and gave you a pointed look. “Baekhyun sacrificed a lot for you. He is so loyal to you despite all the matters you guys have. He never told us but we have a hunch. Just… don’t go breaking his heart.”

“I am not breaking his heart!” you said loudly, tears rolling down your cheeks. “He doubts my feelings.”

“He doesn't. He is insecure.”

“How can he be insecure? All I ever wanted was to be with him.”

Chanyeol stepped closer to you, causing you to tilt your head back further. “Then go back and amend the mess you made.”

“It's not just my mess. It's ours. We made it. He should know what he told me was wrong.”

“All he ever did was listen to you! What makes you think that guy has unlimited patience? He doesn't! So go back, and make it right again!”

You let out a loud groan, turning away from him. You tapped your foot on the concrete, thinking hard though you were close to exasperation. Turning back to Baekhyun's friend, you muttered: “Since you brought those keys, take me on a drive. I’ll sponsor the gas.”

It was already late when you returned back but at least you managed to clear up your mind. Quietly slipping back inside his dark room, you saw him lying in bed, his back turned to you. Putting your bag quietly down on the floor, you slipped under the comforter, your arms and legs hugging him like a koala bear.

You thought he was asleep or worse, that he’d ignore you, but he moved almost as soon as you hugged him, turning in your embrace, pushing his leg between yours and his hand circling your waist, his hand on the skin of your lower back. It was pitch black in the room, but once you felt his hot breath on your mouth and then the moisture of his lips on yours, you didn't need to see. You just felt. He kissed you and poured all of his apologies, regrets and forgiveness in the kiss. You returned the kiss just as fervently, feeling his warm hand on your cheek, his fingers in your hair while his thumb smoothed the skin under your eye. He shuffled himself closer and hummed when you darted out your tongue. He sucked on your lip a little longer before opening his mouth to let you in, and you took your time in exploring him, twirling and sucking on his tongue while you felt his arm tightening around you, his hand under your hoodie as he caressed you under your breast. In the quietness of his room there were just the slick sounds of your making out.

When you couldn't keep going anymore, you separated, your mouth fully wet from your mixed saliva as you panted loudly. You felt him pressing his forehead to yours and you sighed in relief.

“I'm so sorry, princess,” he whispered, nuzzling your nose gently, dragging his leg up so he could rest it on your thigh. “I was a fool.”

“No,” you whispered back, wishing you could see him better. “You merely stated the facts. It's all on me.”

“We both screwed up,” he added, “but fuck.” He gave your cheek a small, open-mouthed kiss, sending shivers down your spine, “I can't imagine you leaving me and being with him. I can't.”

You wanted to reply to him and to ease his mind that you wouldn't, but you would lie. The more you would keep to yourself, the more you would end up hurting the most precious person in your life.

“I'm so sorry. None of what I said is true,” you managed to blurt, unable to come up with anything more. “I keep breaking you. I'm so sorry.”

“Shh, baby,” he whispered urgently, his hand that was resting on your cheek slipping to the back of your head to bring you closer. You hid your face in his chest while he hid his in your neck. “You're not breaking me. You're breaking me if I'm not with you.”

You snuggled closer to him and he sighed, hugging you tighter. “My precious gem, I love you,” he whispered into your ear. To make your body contact more intimate, you also hid your hands under his hoodie, feeling his muscles contracting at your delicate touch. “You're mine.”

Few days later you received a message. It was from Mr Kwon and you groaned, stopping on your way to another class.

I request a lunch with you today

My driver will pick you up at 12

I know you're not supposed to be having classes

You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you pushed your phone back into your bag and headed inside the classroom. Even if you would reject him, he wouldn't accept it, so you might as well not bother with replying.

However, you were shocked when the driver came all the way to your classroom as all the students were pouring out and heading for lunch. You knew Mr Kwon's driver and even though he was polite, you didn't like the looks he was giving you whenever he saw you wearing skirts, like for instance, now.

He escorted you to the expensive restaurant where they were already waiting for you. Upon spotting you, the staff rushed towards you and led you to Mr Kwon who was already seated, his hands clasped together as his elbows rested on the table. He stood up, giving you a polite bow as he helped you sit down.

When he was opposite you, he said: “Pleasure to see you. How have you been the past few days we didn't see each other?”

You suppress a tired sigh. “I've been fine, thank you.”

“Oh, have you, now?” he questioned, his eyebrow lifting. His eyes were telling you something he wasn't verbalizing and it put you into unease right away.

Smiling, you muttered: “Yes, but thank you for your concern.”

“No issues with your friends?”

His stupid inquisition was starting to annoy you. “Excuse me? Could you please speak more explicitly?”

“I thought you'd never ask,” he smirked and took out an envelope from the inside of his cardigan and handed it to you over the table.

With uncertainty, you accepted it and opened it, not wasting time in trying to understand his mysterious words. There were photos. Frowning, you inspected them better and you were shocked when you saw it was you with a tall male. Park Chanyeol. It must have been that night when you fought with Baekhyun. Your breath hitched in your throat when you realized this man had you followed by someone.

You opened your mouth to talk but he cut through like a knife. “I was wondering where did you receive such a - how shall I put it - passionate bruise on your neck the last time I saw you. Turns out you're sleeping around with someone.”

It felt like he just threw a bucket of icy cold water on you. The idea of him having you followed, of him not trusting you and rudely breaking into your privacy as if you were some object he could manipulate and decide whom to meet and whom to not meet was driving you up the wall.

“You don't have anything to defend yourself?” he asked sharply. “How long have you been seeing that man?”

You swallowed on a dry throat. Mr Kwon thought your boyfriend was Park Chanyeol? That was good. As long as he had no knowledge about Baekhyun, you didn't care. “I… it's been…”

“Jesus Christ, I really didn't think you would be a whore,” he snickered, eyeing you up and his eyes eventually resting on your cleavage. “You were acting all innocent and brave just a few years ago and attending university changed you so much. I wanted to be the only one who would bed you,” he sneered and you felt a bile rising in your stomach.

“What- Excuse me?! Who do you think you are?!” you exclaimed, horrified. “Don't you dare think of me that way.” You stood up and wanted to scream when you saw his eyes drinking up your thighs that got revealed as your skirt hiked up. “A deal is a deal. You don't have any rights to treat me like this. And you can bet you aren't going to boss me around once we are married. I'll easily reject the marriage, too.”

Mr Kwon was fast up on his feet to walk over to you. “Well, if you do, your parents are as good as dead. Their business is in shackles, young lady. So unless you want them to be able to afford some food and have a roof over their heads, I advise you to respect me,” he was talking so fast you could barely register his touch on your hip and on your backside. Gasping, you slapped his hand away and dared to push him from you. He snickered.

“Watch your hands, Mr Kwon,” you spat. “This is a private property.”

He laughed and leaned in. “Oh, are you like this with him too? Then I can't wait to have the full rights. The only one with rights. Soon, little tiger.” You moved to push him away when he added: “You better end this little thingy you have with the boy. Because if I find out who he is, I will destroy him and any perspectives he could have for the future.”

Even though he didn't know about Byun Baekhyun, you could not risk it.

You had to break up with him.

// // // // //

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hannie-dul-set · 4 years

Text

virtue of humility [choi seungcheol]

“humility /(h)yo͞oˈmilədē/ — a modest or low view of one's own importance; humbleness.”

LUCKY 7′S MASTERLIST

PAIRING | prince! choi seungcheol x musician! reader (f) GENRE | royal! au, romance, fluff WARNINGS | none <3 WORD COUNT | 4.8k

a/n: hello!! :> my pieces for the collab are a little different from lila and gina’s because i went for a more thematic approach. nevertheless, i hope you’ll still enjoy <33 also the language is a lil oldsey-timesey HJSHF just a heads up HAHA

Prince Seungcheol had never thought of the glimmer of the crown perched on his head as something more significant than an accessory. Though bearing an extra weight with the dazzles of its heavy ruby and sapphire embellishments, it felt as if it wasn’t even there. But for most of his waking hours, the prince would resign from wearing it— head barren from the symbol of his nobility.

“But you’re the prince,” his Royal Advisor, Jeonghan, had once said. “What service will your people owe to you when they know not who to serve?”

“Is it not the prince's duty to serve? To meet the needs of his people?” a smile plastered on his lips, Seungcheol answered, pushing the golden wreath back into his advisors hands. “I am a servant just as I am a prince. There is no need for grandeurs such as these.”

Jeonghan had never roused the same question again.

The same could be said today; strolling over the family of large rocks beside the crystal stream, Seungcheol gleamed as the wind brushed like whispered breaths through his hair, uncovered by the weight of his crown. He eyed a school of silver fishes swimming against the light current of water, crouching down on the rough stone to look at them closely. A content sigh breezed past his lips, and he dipped two fingers on the water’s clean surface, the sudden cold kissing his fingertips sending a slight shiver down his spine. There was no one else around the stream— Seungcheol would know since he spends almost every other day in solitude here.

He liked being in the palace. He liked being around the people he loved, and those who loved him just as much. But Seungcheol also liked being alone from time to time.

Although it seemed that he wasn’t alone. The faint, but definite sound of singing was telling him so.

It was far. But despite the distance, Seungcheol noticed someone— the silhouette of what appeared to be a lady sitting atop the identical looking clump of rocks in front of the same stream he was in front of, only opposite from where Seungcheol was. It was either his curiosity or the sweetness of the voice’s notes beckoning him to move closer, but when he was halfway there, he concluded that it was a mixture of both.

Seungcheol found it unusual for anyone other than himself to be here. It was unspoken, but all the residents of the Northern Empire’s village knew that the prince frequented this spot, and therefore they all stayed away out of respect for his peace. It was a shame, really. Prince Seungcheol would have welcomed any other presence outside of his into his supposed private hideout. Therefore the appearance of the mysterious girl was a sort of shooting star for him— a brief flash of bubbling hope that you’d have to quickly grasp before it disappears once more.

And so he moved at a quicker pace to catch you.

You, on the other hand, were sitting peacefully on top of the hard, grey, rock, the hem of your skirt barely fluttering over the stream’s mouth as your legs were stretched over the tough surface. The echoes of your singing were fairly silent— though apparently that wasn’t the case seeing that you were loud enough for someone to approach you, and you immediately closed your mouth shut.

“Why did you stop? Are you not comfortable with eyes watching you as you sing?”

“I am not comfortable with a stranger’s eyes watching me. It does not matter whether I sing or not,” the man smiled at you— an apologetic smile, and he respected your wishes as he did not dare to close the distance of the stream that separated you both.

“I apologize for making you uncomfortable,” he said, propping himself down on the rocky surface. “But it is rare to have someone other than myself to be here. I would like to make your acquaintance, if you may.”

You eyed him suspiciously, and you could tell that he noticed your distrust because he shot you the most charming display of a smile that anyone has ever sent you. “Do you own this area? I’m not trespassing, am I?” you pressed, and it took him a few moments of silence before he responded.

“Well yes, I suppose,” he answered, and there was a flash of panic running through you upon realizing that you had just wandered into this man’s property without his prior knowledge. You were lucky that he seemed to be forgiving. “Though, I’m always willing to share. That is if you share something of yours, as well.”

To share? You had nothing to share even if you wanted to.

“What could I possibly share with you?” your brows furrowed. “You noticed me from as far as dozens of spaces away, yet upclose you cannot seem to see that I am empty handed.”

If he wanted you to leave, he could have just said so. But he also said that he wanted to make your acquaintance, so what were you to take out of it? He wanted you to stay but for you to stay you had to give. But he knew and could see that you had nothing to give, so what could he want?

“Your name.”

He said. The stray kisses of the sun's rays served as a transparent crown of gold above his head as he uttered his sentiments with a blinding smile. “You can share with me your name.”

That was none of what I expected, you thought, pressing your lips together in a tight line to mask even a sliver of your amusement, but it would only take one quick glance for anyone to notice the smile trying to fight its way into your face. To be frank, you weren't aware of what you were expecting— but you had assumed that you would be staying here for much longer. It appeared that it wasn't the case anymore. He knew how to impress you, but you had cards of your own. “But that would mean that you’d have to share your name, too. And I’d have nothing else to give after that.”

There was silence that occupied, but with the unrelenting nature of his smile, you could only assume that he was unbothered by your challenge. You continued to look at him from across the stream, the rippling of its waters flooding into your ears before he finally decided to speak,

“I will be giving you my name for free,” his tone mimicked that of the running water— calm, gentle. Without a trace of impurity in its crystal clear vulnerability. “So there is no need for you to remain at an unease.”

The nameless man stood from the slippery edge, blocking the sun away and it looked as if he, himself, was the blazing sun. The dimples on his cheeks— details that you have overlooked before and had only been captured by your eyes now— made a shy appearance in accordance with the upturn of his mouth’s corners.

“Seungcheol.”

“Y/N.”

He took this as an invitation to finally be allowed to cross the stream, and so he did, the water sloshing around his ankles as he pushed forward. It wasn’t too deep, thankfully, and only the bottom part of his dark trousers were drenched. Seungcheol positioned himself beside you, far enough not to invade your comfort, but close enough for you to feel his serene presence. “Is it alright for me to ask a question?” You nodded, urging him. “Are you from the Southern Empire, perhaps?”

Your brows raised. Huh, he was quick to notice that you were a foreigner. There were no physical distinctions that differentiated those from the Northern Empire, where you were right now, and the Southern Empire, where you actually lived. Maybe Seungcheol was familiar with those living around, and he thought that you looked unfamiliar. “Yes. How did you know?”

“You don’t seem like you’re from here.”

To Seungcheol, there were a few telltales indicating that you lived from the opposite land. One, you didn’t know that people tend to steer away from this place. And two— it didn’t look like you were aware that he was the prince. (This was why he hesitated in answering your question earlier. Technically, this was public property, but technically it was his, as well).

There wasn’t a need for him to tell you now, though. It wasn’t of importance, anyway.

“What brings you here, Y/N? Are you on a visit?”

“Half visit, I suppose,” you answered, and Seungcheol quirks a brow at this. “Half for an event.”

“An event? Is it the ball to be held at the palace this weekend?”

“Yes, that exactly,” you adjusted your sitting position, folding your legs as you looked at nowhere in particular in the midst of your thought. “I was lucky enough to be one few chosen by the music academy I’m in to play with the Northern ensemble. But of course I wouldn’t want to miss the chance to take a peek of the foreign empires sceneries.”

A grin was plastered on your face when you turned to look at the boy beside you, and it appeared that he was mirroring your expression. “I’ll be there, as well. Would that mean I’d be graced by the chance to hear you sing again?”

You lapsed, visibly flushed at his inquiry and you sat yourself straight as you were suddenly flooded by the realization that the reason he had found you was because of your singing.

“A-absolutely not," you stammered. "I play the violin.”

“Ah, I see,” he didn’t put an effort to mask his disappointment, and it wasn’t of any help to your already racing heart. You weren’t one to let just anyone to hear you sing— it was embarrassing. Yet this boy who you had just met today had already driven himself past your sphere of comfort, but you still found yourself just brushing it away, locking it away to someplace you’ll never find, just so the shame won’t be able to meet the light of day once again.

Seungcheol took note of your silence and he felt as if he were the cause of it. Fearing that he might end up chasing away a possible friend, he resorted to making conversation on a different topic, instead. “I heard that there were an abundance of herbs and spices in the North.”

You lightened up at this, relieved that he took a different route, and Seungcheol felt mirth tugging at his cheeks at your reaction. “Mhm. Is it not the case here?”

He shook his head. “Mining is the biggest industry here. We acquire all our herbs from yours.”

The sun was slowly rising higher into the sky, in sync with the prickling temperature. Though beside the stream, the breeze was crisp, cool kisses against your skin as you and Seungcheol talked the day away until it was already around lunch time and the morning's heat had finally made aware of its presence. And it also made you aware of the schedule you had for the remaining afternoon.

“Oh! How stupid of me to forget— ah!” in your rush to stand, you clumsily lost your footing on the slippery rock, the body of water inviting your immediate fall. But it never came, as Seungcheol was quick enough to catch you by the waist, pulling you into him in one swift motion.

It was the second time that you had buried your shame.

“Careful now,” he retracted his hold from you when you had finally caught your balance, the ghost of his touch sizzling amidst the sun’s heat. You stared at him, flustered, and he gave you a kind stretch of his lips. “You may be in a hurry, but it would be fruitless if you only end up soaking wet.”

“At least I’d be cool underneath this angry sun,” you reasoned, though still a bit dazed from the earlier rush. “Thank you.”

Seungcheol nodded a smile at you, steadily guiding your posture as you carefully puddled into the brook, feeling the cold water on your ankles when you did. He did not remove his gentle touch on your shoulders, nor did he keep his eyes off you even when you have finally crossed the waters, and you found yourself stirring— tides crashing harder than that of the stream. He only let go when the presence of the rocks were nowhere to be found anymore.

“May I ask what brings you in such a rush?”

The village was now in your short view, though you were still shielded by the barrier of birch trees lining the outside of the rural area. You were supposed to be at your temporary housing at around thirty.

“Practice,” you answered. "The ball is a mere seven days away.”

Seungcheol nodded at your sparing response. “I’ll be seeing you by then. Or perhaps tomorrow? That is If willing to keep me company again. It does get rather lonely with nothing but the fishes accompanying me. They aren't chatty fellows.”

The soft sound of your laughter was all he heard. You smiled at him, a smile that weighed heavier than his crown and he found his chest squeezing at the pressure.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Seungcheol.”

A week melted into days and days melted into minutes into seconds until you found yourself within the vicinity of your fellow musicians inside the blue haze of the Diamond Palace’s ballroom. The large hall mimicked that of a watery stream with the crystal linings of its walls, and the flooding bodies of the numerous visitors beamed like swimming sea creatures. You had not yet seen Seungcheol as of late, even though he promised that you’d meet once more today, for tomorrow was your day of departure.

Racing eyes accompanied by your racing heart moved in beats of impatience as you scanned the façade of water, only to leave you unsatisfied from the lack of his presence. You’ve only spent days with him— yet those days were enough to concur a sweetened taste of mutual longing.

On your second day, Seungcheol showed you a field of flowers a few strolls past the familiar stream. The third day ended with a rapid flurry of conversations about everything and nothing at the same time, and it resulted with you running late for your practice. It was all worth it, though, because it was also on that day that you had found out that Seungcheol hosted the most modest of souls out of all the empires. You accompanied him at the marketplace after you spent hours by the stream, and you witnessed him silently helping the vendors in small, simple ways without even whispering a word. On day four you’d gotten even closer. A stranger no longer was he. And on day five you felt the first of many butterflies swarming inside your stomach, and since then you had lost it.

You shared your first kiss on the sixth day, and the seventh ended with another.

It was quick, you had to admit. And it will end too quickly for your liking. Perhaps that was why the days felt like pages flipping through the thinnest book on the shelf, or a winter solstice in the middle of summer that has prolonged its visit for six days more. Though, you were determined to see him once again this evening, even if it took until the last warning of the ballroom’s final lit torch.

“Y/N, is your mind elsewhere? The ball is starting and we are to get in position at once. Hurry up,” the ushering voice of your companion, Jihye, was like the chirping of an annoying swallow that you wished to die down. Indeed, this opportunity to play for the Royal Family was an honor. But as you moved along with your travels across the empires, so had your priorities as they have shifted from the south to the north.

However, you didn’t want to cause any trouble— especially if it was only because of the selfishness of your desires. So with a disheartened sigh, you picked up your stringed instrument and melted into the orchestra as you waited for the Noble’s entrance.

It was difficult to fiddle with the violin when your heart was elsewhere, but you had to will yourself to focus so as to not bring shame to your academy’s name. You straightened your posture and positioned the instrument, and you maneuvered the bow in the same manner as you had tirelessly practiced for weeks. For a while, you had managed to rid yourself from the ghosting thoughts of Seungcheol.

That is until the Emperor, Empress, and Prince finally descended down the grand staircase, and the familiar swarm of butterflies fizzled into your chest— untamed and unforgiving as they drowned what semblance of peace you had managed to belatedly hold on to.

You had been aching to see Seungcheol’s face tonight, but this was none of what you had expected.

“Gracing before us, the heart of the Northern Empire— the Imperial Family!”

It was as if you were stricken by Cupid’s merciless arrows ten times over because only one was clearly not enough. Everyone around you had fallen their heads in a respectful bow, yet you still stood staring at the Prince in such a spell-bound daze until Jihye pulled you down with her like a ragdoll.

You couldn’t believe it.

Seungcheol and the Prince of the North were one and the same.

Were you mistaken? Did he not care for you enough to tell you that he was the actual heir to the Empire's throne? You raised your head upon sensing the movements of the people around you, but you were a beat behind since you still hadn’t recovered from the befuddlement inflicted on your senses. You were lucky enough to only be playing along one piece for tonight’s ball, else your performance would have been a disaster. Having managed to finish the piece with minor mistakes was a miracle in itself, but that’s where your miracles would end.

Because the moment the last note came to an end, the moment you were about to step down from the elevated stage along with your companions, you had noticed Seungcheol staring right at you.

He was smiling.

And the butterflies were almost impossible to contain.

You felt someone tugging at your arm, insisting you to leave, and so you reluctantly did— but not without sparing one last glance at Seungcheol, sitting high and mighty on his golden throne. He looked different, completely different from the boy the stream who you fleetingly fell for. But it was him all the same. His gorgeous smile telling you. You hoped that it wasn’t your mind playing tricks on you when you noticed his smile melting into a sad puddle of a frown when you finally left.

“Is that the prince circling amongst the crowd?”.

“What?”

Jihye whispered from beside you as you rushed to the buffet, and you quickly snapped your head back to confirm, and your eyes were met with the familiar gaze of the ones you’d get lost into for hours on end. He shot you a grin upon eye contact, and you felt yourself starting to get dizzy.

It was him. Despite the barrage of bodies between you, you could immediately tell which pretty eyes were his.

Did he forget that he was the prince?! You saw him trying to chase after you, but you firmly shook your head as Jihye dragged you away, the distance between you stretching farther and farther. He looked confused, baffled in a frozen stance when you motioned to push him away. But he was the prince. No matter how you felt, no matter how desperately you wanted to be held in his arms and be swept by his lips on yours, he can’t be seen with you. You were beneath him, after all.

“Y/N, would you please hurry? Heavens, girl, what has gotten into you tonight?”

You couldn’t be seen with him.

“My apologies, Jihye, but I haven’t been feeling well since earlier,” you said. “I’ll resign to bed early tonight.”

Not with the lingering eyes of everyone in the ballroom.

“Oh dear, you better get some rest, Y/N. I’ll tell everyone else that you left early.”

You could only hope that Seungcheol understood the same.

The stream sparkled under the moonlight, as if the waters were littered with iridescent beads of glitter, swimming alongside the silver fishes that inhabited it. You carefully maneuvered over the rocky ground, hands gripping the fabric of your dress skirts upwards so you won’t trip over them and fall into the cold water. Seungcheol wasn’t here to catch you like last time.

You were still lost because of the information that you had belatedly found out, and you weren’t even given the chance to let it all simmer. Seungcheol was the prince of the Northern Empire¾ that you knew. Why he didn’t even give you the slightest hint about the significance of his identity that you didn’t know. And you were determined to find out before you took you leave tomorrow.

That is if he showed up tonight.

Words weren’t exchanged between the both of you, but maybe he understood the message that you tried to relay just by the look of your eyes The ball wasn’t to end until an hour or two, so you had a long time to lie in wait, sitting atop the clump of stones as you gazed down at your reflection on the water, the moon peeking behind your presence.

Though, you underestimated the prince. Because it hadn’t even been ten when he showed himself before you across the stream.

“Why did you depart so early without even allowing me to spend a second near your presence?” his voice held the sound of hurt, and it made you feel guilty almost. Seungcheol hurriedly dip his ankles into the stream, racing across it to get to you as if you would slip away if he were a second too late. You helped him up the harsh surface, and the first thing he did was caress your cold cheek with the warmth of his hand, fingers blazing like the sun’s rays as you felt them brushing against your skin. There was a pout on his lips when he spoke. “Had I done something wrong?”

You held his wrist with your hands, bringing them down but you didn’t let go of him, and then with a soft voice, you asked. “Why didn’t you tell me you were the prince?”

“I—” he was taken aback at your question, brows raised in surprise with the subtle pursing of his lips ever so evident. “I didn't think it was necessary.”

“You didn’t think it was necessary? Seung— Your Highness, that's the same as keeping your entire self from me,” you tried to let go of his hand, but he immediately snatched them back, intertwining your fingers into his once more without ever the intention of letting you go. Seungcheol was upset. He was upset because you didn’t call him by his given name. He was upset that you’re trying to make things change.

He was upset because he didn’t understand why the idea of him being the prince seemed so important to you.

“But I never kept myself from you, Y/N,” he reasoned, brows furrowed in frustration. “I may be the prince but that is only a title. More than anything else, I am Seungcheol.”

You stared at him, his eyes containing all the stars in the night sky, pleading for the night to stay longer as tomorrow meant seeing you no longer. His lips, so pretty and red against his glowing skin, tugged down in a tight frown that you oh so desperately wanted to kiss away.

“It pained me when you pushed me away earlier,” he muttered, a release of melancholic laughter stringing behind it. “Did you have a change of heart after a single instance?”

You narrowed your eyes at him, offended by his ridiculous assumption. “Do you know how people would react if they see the prince with a mere musician? I pushed you away because it was the right thing to do. Not because I wanted to.”

“Is it right to be dishonest?”

“That is not the point!” you weren’t able to cease the unprecedented elevation of your voice, but then you quickly slammed your fingers over your lips. Seungcheol noticed your gestures, only furrowing the heaviness he was feeling even further. “Please do not humble yourself for me, Your Highness. Do you not hold any importance to your title at all?”

“No.”

It was an immediate response. A response that carried neither regret nor hesitation— only sheer and sincere honesty. Though you stood before him, he looked at you as if you were so far away, yearning for you. “Prince or not, my heart remains the same. I still would have kissed you on the sixth.”

You weren’t prepared for his bold confession. Not at all because you found yourself slipping away from your presence of mind, an influx of emotions clogging your throat as you refused to meet his eye. Seungcheol lightly chuckled at your abashment, him ghosting his fingers underneath your chin so you would look at him. “Is there something wrong?” despite the worried tone of his question, a belated smile stretched on his face. He was mildly delighted seeing your flustered stance.

“You are the prince, Your Highness. Yet you treat me as though I were a goddess,” your eyes were wilting, apologetic under his presence. You brushed away his gentle hold, the warmth of his grazing touch disappearing as you did. “I don’t believe I deserve this, Your Highness. I don't deserve to be in your presence— much less to share a kiss with you.”

“Nonsense. You are deserving for the fact that it is what you and I both want. Why? Do you not want to kiss me?”

“You are impossible,” you breathed out amidst the brandishing of your nerves. “What would your parents say about this?”

“Nothing,” he simply stated. “They might have dictated my future, but they do not dictate how my heart feels.”

It felt as if the two of you were pushing and pulling back and forth for hours. It was mostly due to your own stubbornness, honestly. It wasn’t as if you didn’t want him. It wasn’t easy to mask something as wild and torrid as a stormy typhoon. You were trying your best because it was what you were supposed to do, but deep down you knew that one word from him would be enough to have you releasing your desperately, weakly, suppressed emotions.

“And my heart feels for you, Y/N.”

This wasn’t fair. He wasn’t fair. What chance did you have when it was he who was rendering you defenseless? You stared at Seungcheol, incredulous and so, so lost for him all the same. He was expectant of your response— you could tell from the way he looked at you with hopeful eyes which made you willing to forget that he was the prince because he was right. It didn’t matter. Not at all.

You sighed, rolling your eyes, and you took a single step closer towards him over the rough surface of the rocks.

“Does your offer for a kiss still stand?” you mused. “Or am I a second too late?”

Seungcheol’s eyes fluttered, both from surprise and from the fleeting feeling of delight. “You’re never too late,: he smiled at you, gaze pooling the drops of the moon’s light— endless, as if you could get lost in them. You leaned in. feeling the warmth of his breath tickling the skin on your face like invisible, teasing kisses. There was a lapse of hesitation running through you because was it alright for you to just have him right here and now? He didn’t seem to be protesting.

You were only seconds away from finally getting a taste of him, but he suddenly backed away at the last moment.

“But then you did waste a fair amount of time,” he wore a pondering pout on his lips, and stared at him wide eyed. But then he met your eyes with his dimpled grin blooming on his features. “Maybe you should make up for it by singing to me one last time before your departure.”

You rolled your eyes at him, dismissing the prince’s proposal. Instead you quickly grabbed the expensive fabric of his collar, pulling him towards you in a sudden motion, and snatched a swift kiss from his unguarded lips.

“The night is long, my prince,” you hummed. You weren’t sure why you were hesitant to be truthful to yourself earlier— it wasn't like anything had changed after all. The smile on Seungcheol’s face was still the same as the one you saw that morning. “Blackbirds won’t be singing until a few hours.”

“But you will sing for me now, won’t you?” he asked, a hopeful glimmer in his eyes.

You couldn’t help your lips from stretching into a wide grin. “It is only fair for me to do so.”

#lucky 7's #caratwritersclub #choi seungcheol #choi seungcheol x reader #seungcheol x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen #svt #svt x reader #seungcheol #choi seungcheol scenarios #seungcheol scenarios #seventeen scenarios #seungcheol fluff #svt fanfic #svt fluff #prince seungcheol #prince seungcheol x reader

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shutupaboutandraste · 3 years

Note

“I think you’re going to ruin me. Am I right?” for adoribull? happy friday ^^

Happy Friday and thank you for the prompt! I'm very excited so I hope you enjoy it. Word Count: 1070 For @dadrunkwriting Corypheus is dead.

After great highs come mighty lows. The Inquisitor is much too busy answering questions and being the big damn hero that she is. Blackwall had been following her like the world’s largest guard dog-- as if she needed one. Cadash doesn’t, but Blackwall worships the ground she walks on while she goes about adoring him. What they had was beautiful. Dorian could only wish to be so lucky.

Corypheus is dead and the Inquisition is going back to normal.

Cullen is on the grounds with the soldiers, training as if they still had a war to fight. Josephine had been seen with paperwork on some noble, extra duties laid upon her as every noble wanted a glimpse at the Carta dwarf who had saved the world. Leliana is somewhere. Dorian is never entirely sure exactly where. Everyone else flits about getting done their duties. When Dorian looks over the edge, though, he no longer sees Solas. He can no longer throw down books or notes to someone who would read them.

An intense bout of melancholy settles over Dorian. Perhaps that’s why he has a glass of wine easily an hour before noon. Bitter taste floods over his tongue as he swallows down tears. He told the Inquisitor he would stay. He has no intent upon leaving the Inquisition. Still, it feels as though the world has been upended in the wake of the greatest victory the could have had. His fingers creaked around the glass, trying to place the source of this melancholic wave upon himself.

“Hey, Kadan.”

And then there was that. Still as silent as a chantry mouse despite his large size, The Iron Bull has snuck up on him. His voice doesn’t scare Dorian. No, if anything a wave of calm washes over him. That was what Bull’s voice did to him now-- brought him peace or made his knees weak. Damn him. Damn this wonderful, perfect beast of a man.

Except that he wasn’t a beast. Perhaps a beast in bed, a beast on the battlefield, perhaps had a beastly, hungry smile. No, all of those things were perfect and beautiful and Bull. Dorian loves him. It wasn’t some flight of fancy. How he wished it was only months ago. Now, his body aches for Bull, feeling the love deep within his bones. His heart squeezes when Bull smiles, his body goes weak at his words, his dreams are filled with the two of them together.

Bull leans down and presses a kiss to the top of Dorian’s head before leaning back to rub at his shoulders. Muscles relaxed beneath the firm, caring touch. A lump forms in his throat, tightening within him until he feels like he can’t breathe. His breath shakes as he tries to gasp for air. His head moves slightly back and forth, thoughts spinning like wildfire in a lush forest.

“I think you’re going to ruin me. Am I right?” he chokes out, softly, voiced straining.

“What?” Bull rumbles, still pressing careful fingers between Dorian’s shoulder blades.

Dorian shakes his head again, “You know what I said. Don’t play coy.”

Bull presses a kiss to the back of Dorian’s neck, peppering them slowly down to the top of his shoulders. Suddenly, Dorain feels himself scooped up into massive, warm arms. A scoff escapes him, his hand reaching up to shove at Bull’s cheek. His arms are weak against his lover, Bull quickly burying himself into the side of Dorian’s neck, suckling the skin and grazing it with his teeth.

“Is that so bad?” he asks, “I like ruining you.”

“You,” Dorian tries to regain his head, though it's hard with Bull working the magic he could do with his mouth, “Are everything I should hate. My father and I--”

“Is that it?” asks Bull pulling up, “Because you’ve been able to talk to him again.”

Dorian rubs his face with his hands, “Everything… Why are we still here? Without Corypheus? What if I’ve grown so attached to you that I can’t bear it if we were to break apart without what brought us together.”

Bull laughs. Indignation rises up in Dorian’s chest. A huff escapes him, bitter as the wine he is-- as the wine that is now spilled on the floor of the library with the glass shattered at Bull’s feet. Someone was going to have to clean that up. Would it be either of them? Not Dorian if he could help it.

“Never,” he sighs, “Just put me down.”

“I’m sorry,” Bull says, nipping at Dorian’s ear, “You just… think too much.”

“Oh, I think too much?” he asks, sarcastically, “What was your name once? Ash-kah-ree?”

“Your pronunciation is still bad,” Bull snickers, “...Nothing's gonna stop me from loving you, kadan. Not even those thoughts. Besides, I already told you, I like ruining you.”

Emotion presses into the spaces of Dorian’s heart that weren’t already filled with Bull. Living in the aftermath of Corypheus was like coming down from a high. The party was the zenith, drinking and celebration. It was only natural that the crash would be astronomical. That it would put the fear of the Maker into Dorian’s heart about all he had come to love about the South-- about all he had come to love about the man in whose arms he was resting.

His arms snake around Bull until he can latch his fingers together. Once the circle around Bull is complete, Dorian tugs himself up to kiss him. It’s unusually chaste for the two of them and Dorian is surprised that Bull lets it be. The kiss is all lips, tender flesh careful to mold against each other. If a single salty tear or maybe two pass through his eyes over their lips, Bull doesn’t seem to mind.

The parting is slow, long and ends with Dorian leaning his forehead against Bull’s own. A gentle heartbeat thrummed between them. Highs were wonderful things, they could bring bliss and excitement. Coming down could always be catastrophic or just a blip on the radar of life. Yet, being with Bull felt somewhere in between.

Being with Bull felt content. Maybe he was ruined from having love for anyone else. But would that be so bad? Even now it was clear that Bull was just as content as he was. Dorian could live with that. He could live with that for a lifetime.

#da drunk writing circle #dadwc #prompt #da #dai #dorian pavus #the iron bull #adoribull

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imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl · 4 years

Text

Stay With Me (Pt. 05 of 09)

Pairing: Daryl Dixon X Reader

Word count: 3 K

Summary: Daryl found you surrounded by the dead, stuck in the backseat of a car. You were wishing for death to take you away for quite a while now, but, as you slid back and forth into consciousness, there was only one thing keeping you alive. Him, the man with blue, worried eyes and kind voice. Your beaten up body was ready to give up, too wounded and broken to keep going. But this man, who went out of his way to save your life is the only thing in the world holding you up. And, because of him, you feel something you haven't felt in a very long time: hope. Wherever he's taking you, you want to get there, and not only to be buried. For what it feels like the very first time, you want to live. He takes you back to Alexandria, but even there, the nightmares and the terror from all the torture and pain you've been through keeps creeping closer, and Daryl, your hero, is the only one who can keep that all away.

Warnings: Mentions and description (not graphic) of past abuse; post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD); some violence at the end of the story (a little bit graphic, but not so much); blood.

<- Previous part (04)

Next part (06) ->

{The Walking Dead Masterlist}

I want to thank my awesome friend @jodiereedus22 , who helped me (and still does) a lot to get this story done. She's also a writer and she's amazing so please go check her work!!

Touch

You're right back into the dark spot you were. If it wasn't for Carol, you'd be in bed all day, completely lost. She keeps you moving. She helps you shower, chattering even though you don't answer. She helps you get downstairs, allowing you to do something for lunch or dinner. Carol's patience is unbelievable. You wonder when she'll get tired of you too. When she'll leave, with rude words and no further explanation.

Being here without Daryl is weird. Unusual. You didn't know the exact place he occupied in your heart, but now it's pretty clear. But you don't know how it happened. You thought this constant necessity of being with him came from the situation. From the safety he provided. When he's next to you in bed, your head on his chest, you know he won't let anything hurt you. Not even the nightmares had that power anymore, the bad memories are just that. Memories. But now... Daryl is more than a hero to you. He's something else entirely. He's the only one you'll ever want to have this close. The only man you'll ever want to hug, to lean on, to hold next to you during the night.

But what's the use of such acknowledgment now? Daryl left. He literally ran from your touch, from you. And of course he did. You came into his life, a broken, vulnerable thing, needing him so desperately. Of course he'd only endure you for a while. Now, he's done with that and whatever you feel doesn't matter. It's over.

“(Y/N), honey?” Carol calls, coming to sit beside you on the couch. Judith left half an hour ago, but still, you didn't move. You just stood there, drowning in the new, stupid feelings you just found out. “Don't cry, sweetie.”

“It's been six days.” You whisper, a hand on your heart. “He left because of me. I-I pushed him into going who knows where.”

“Daryl didn't go because of you. He went because of himself.” Carol takes a deep breath, talking low. She's always scared you'll slide back into the walls you built around you, so she's always careful. “He's complicated. He's been raised to believe nobody wants or cares for him, or...” When her voice fades, you look up, meeting her eyes. “Or love him.”

This makes you giggle, humorlessly. “What? He's... He's amazing. He's kind and smart, and strong, and handsome, Daryl is... Daryl is honest. And noble. How can he think people won't care for him?” The words flow out, too fast, because it's absurd to hear Carol saying that. It sounds like a joke. “You can't expect me to believe Daryl doesn't see all that.”

Carol's lips break into a smile, you don't get why. “He doesn't.”

“Then I'll make him see.” The same moment the words come out, you remember that he left. That he rejected you. “Well, I...”

“You have feelings for him, don't you? This isn't just about him saving you. There's something else.”

Fixing the blanket around your shoulders, you don't even try to dry off the tears. There will be others to take their place. “It doesn't matter, he...” You've been rejected before. You've had a crush on guys who didn't like you back. But this... This actually hurts. Hurts more than the wounds that still mark your body. “Y-you didn't see it. It's like... He doesn't even want to touch me and when he comes back I'll make sure he won't have to keep helping me.” You're sobbing by the end of the sentence, your body shaking as you cry.

You know you'll be lost without him, never able to feel like that again. The sensation he brought you is unexplainable. Irreplaceable. No man will ever make you feel that way, but that's not his fault. Maybe it's yours. Maybe it's nobody's fault. Everything you know is that you won't let anyone get this close ever again.

“Alright, honey. It's alright.” Carol hugs you, holding you tight as you cry on her shoulder. “Trust me when I say Daryl has very strong feelings for you too. He's just not very good at showing it.”

“Don't.” You mutter. “You can't say these things just to make me feel better, I know he doesn't.”

“Listen, honey. Listen.” She pulls away, drying off some of your tears with her thumbs. “Daryl is scared of how he feels towards you. Believe me, I know him.” Refusing to believe her, to have any kind of hope, you shake your head no. “The reason why he's running from it is that he thinks you can do better. You're young, beautiful, and sweet. He doesn't think he deserves you.”

“Why would he think that? Is he stupid or something?” You manage to say in between sobs, hugging Carol again.

“He can be stupid sometimes, yes.” She rubbs your back. “He will be back and I'm sure you'll get this right. Both of you.”

You don't answer, you just stay there, crying.

More days go by, and you only know he's alright because Rick has a radio, and he talks to Michonne daily, so everyone knows they're both alright.

The only thing that keeps you moving is little Judith. You also got to meet some of the other kids, since Carol decided to bring them here to play with Judith. You love having them around, it makes you forget about things for a while. Carol even introduced you to Melanie, a pregnant woman, and she also starts hanging out at your house, making you her official babysitter. She got here a few months ago, already pregnant. She used to go scavenging before, and that's what she wants to do for this community when her child is born, and she trusts you to be with them while she's away. Knowing you might have something useful to do makes you feel better. Makes you feel like you have something to offer and being with the kids is amazing.

But, eventually, everything comes crashing down, mostly at night, when you lie down all alone, surrounded by darkness. You often dream of Daryl. He's back, with you, not pushing you away. But when the morning comes, his usual place in the bed is still empty.

As the sun sets, you have Judith on your lap, her head on your chest. She's calming down after crying for her father. It took a long time to make her settle down, and now you're trying to make her sleep a little. Rubbing her back, you keep singing the only lullaby you can come up with. “Lavender's green, dilly, dilly, lavender's blue. If you love me, dilly, dilly, I will love you. I love to dance, dilly, dilly, I love to–” You're cut short by the door being open. Terror creeps over as you look up, and the fear is replaced by a mix of so many feelings you can't even name.

Daryl stands there, his eyes locked on yours and despite the distance, you can see the amazing, breathtaking shade of blue that makes your heart beat faster. You hold onto Judith when she moves a little, but she soon settles down again. But your eyes are focused on Daryl, and as much as you want to look away, you can't. It's stronger than you.

“Y-you're alive.” You stutter, holding back the tears. It's been two weeks. Too long, it felt like endless months. “Are you hurt?”

“No.” He simply says. “I'll... Shower. ‘M covered with walker's blood.”

“Ok.” He finally moves, going upstairs and you can finally breathe.

Daryl is back. He's right here and everything you want is to jump in his arms. But you can't. He doesn't want to have anything to do with you. He's done with taking care of you. You have to keep a distance.

You're trying to calm down, focusing on humming the lullaby to keep Judith in her peaceful sleep, trying not to think about Daryl, up there, under the same roof. You try not to think about his arms, always so warm and gentle around you.

“(Y/N).” Carol gets your attention, and you see her coming downstairs, being followed by Daryl. “Let me take Judith to see her dad.”

“Sure.” You burst out, watching as she picks Judith up, careful not to wake her up. “And you two need to talk so I'll stay at Rick's for a while.” She says in a low voice, giving Daryl a look.

You're frozen as she moves to the door, not wanting to risk look at Daryl and burst into tears.

You wanted him back, of course you did, but now, you don't know what to do. You're too scared of your feelings, of what you might do.

“I-I'll head upstairs.” Grabbing the clutch Denise got you, you stumble to your feet.

“We need ta’ talk,” Daryl says, but you ignore him, struggling with the clutch in a way you never did before.

“No, we're-we're fine. I'm fine.” You succeed to climb the first step, but on the second one, you move the wounded leg before you move the clutch, and this added to the whole situation makes you lose your balance and crash down. Luckily, your weight falls on the good leg, but that doesn't mean your body won't complain. A groan leaves your lips, and you feel Daryl's arms pulling you.

“(Y/N), be–”

“Don't touch me!” It's useless now. You're crying, your heart is broken and you can't take it. You can't control it. “Y-you don't like it when I touch you so don't touch me!”

“What the hell makes ya think I don't like when ya touch me?!” Daryl suddenly yells, his voice matching yours. He seems to regret it though, his eyes softening. “What... Who told ya that?”

“I don't need anyone to tell me anything. I'm not stupid.” It comes out in between the sobs as you sit down on the steps, throwing the clutch away. “You don't need to take care of me anymore! I... I'll get better and you won't have to think about me anymore. I can deal with the pain, the fear the nightmares! I can! If you don't want me anymore it's fine!” You yell at the top of your lungs, not proud of the way you're breaking down. But what can you do? Your heart is broken.

“I ain't–”

“You don't have to go in a hell of a long run to be away from me! I can just find another house to live in and get the hell out of your way if that's what you want and I'm so damn sorry I need you so much, Daryl. I'm so damn sorry I like you, or-or–” You lose your train of thought, sobbing uncontrollably, looking at the floor because you can't bring yourself to face Daryl now.

“Ya got it all wrong.” He mutters, coming to sit on the stairs, but you move back, pushing yourself against the wall. If you get any closer to him, you'll fail. You'll hug and hold and kiss him.

“Stop it, Daryl! I know you're tired of me so j-just stay away if that's what you want.” The tears soak your face, and you have your eyes closed as if it could hide you from him.

“Ya got it all wrong. Ya shouldn't want ta’ touch me or be around me. Yer so... pretty n’ young n’ good, ya shouldn't want ta’ touch me or be around me. I don't deserve to be with someone like ya n’ yer stupid ta’ want to be around me.” He yells back, raising his voice above yours, but despite the hint of anger, you don't feel scared. But you do need time to take in what he's saying. What he means. “Yer too young. M’ jus’ an old, dirty redneck and I don't... I went out so ya could have some time ta’ get over this. Ta’ not want me close anymore.”

“What are you saying, you idiot.” You stutter, playing back everything he said. “You can't decide what I should or shouldn't want! You have to decide what you want and I'll decide what I want and if these two things come together, then we work from there.” You move a little, the sting on your leg making you uncomfortable. Taking a deep breath, you finally regain some control of yourself, but the tears just keep coming. “I just need to know i-if you don't want... If you don't want me. Me touching you, or hugging you because if that's what you want, it's ok, I'll... I'll stay away.” It hurts to tell him this, and you're terrified of what he'll say next. If that's what he wants... What are you going to do?

“I shouldn't–”

“This is not about what you should, it's about what you want!” You burst out, tired of the argument. You just need to know what is and what isn't, so you can decide what to do next. “You were gone for two goddamn weeks, killing walkers and being in constant danger so just tell me what you want.”

“I want ya.” It comes out like a grunt, too fast and low, and it makes you wonder if you got it right. Daryl looks down, his shaggy hair hiding his eyes. You don't understand why he's so... Scared. Why he thinks so low of himself when you can only see the good, the great man he is. The very best.

“T-then don't push me away. Just... Just stay.” Lowering you're voice until it's barely a whisper, you dry some tears away. “I-I mean, I know that going out there it's your thing, I didn't mean it as you gotta stay here, I just mean it like... With me, you know? Go on runs, but stay with me. D-don't leave me. Well, do leave if that's what you want but not because you think I shouldn't be around you.” It sounds confusing, and you hope he gets it because you don't think you can explain it better.

“M’ sorry.” He mumbles, and this time, when he sits beside you on the step, you allow yourself to hug him, too desperately, feeling more tears coming. “ ‘S alright, babygirl. M’ sorry.”

Without saying anything, you surrender into his embrace, thankful for having him back after so long. Not even the noise coming from the front door makes you pull away.

“I see you two got along,” Carol says, sounding relieved. “You should just be straight forward with each other. It'll save both of you a lot of trouble.” When you hear her coming closer, you raise your head just a little bit to look at her. “(Y/N), why don't you let me help you with showering. There's still sand on your hair. Then you and Daryl can lie down to rest.”

You don't want to let go of him yet, but Carol is right. “Sand?”

“I was with the kids on that playground and little Mike threw a handful of sand at Judith but he hit me instead.” You explain it, using the wall to help you up. But Daryl is quick to assist you.

“So yer takin’ care of the kids? And outside?”

“Well, Carol was with me the whole time and it was only half an hour or so.” You let him carry you upstairs, not saying anything about it. Walking is a lot easier now, but you appreciate the gesture. “But I'm like the babysitter now. I really like it.”

“Bet ya do. I heard ya singing for Lil’ Ass Kicker.”

Your cheeks start burning. You had no idea he was listening. “Yeah...” Daryl leaves you in the bathroom and Carol comes soon after.

Showering is less painful now since you can manage to stand up long enough to clean yourself. But washing your hair is still a challenge, and that's why Carol is here. As she washes the sand away, she tells you of her daughter Sofia. About how she got lost and how Daryl restlessly searched for her. And the sad ending of that story. Everyone at the end of the world has a sad story to tell.

Once you're free of the sand and dry, you put your clothes on. You can't find any of your lycra shorts, so you stick with the tank top and panties before going to bed. It's very cold tonight, so you grab another blanket before lying down. You're just about to wonder if Daryl will come when he opens the door, and a smile immediately spreads through your lips.

“Hi.” Trying not to sound too excited, you mutter. It's hard to keep your eyes open, sleep threatening to overcome you.

Daryl grunts something you don't understand, taking off his jacket and leaving it on the dresser. You already moved to the side, giving him space. He pulls the blankets away before lying down, and you giggle to see how he tries not to move the mattress too much. Once he's settled down, you turn on your side, facing away from him, getting comfortable. You wait for him to do the same, but he doesn't move. By the time you had him sleeping here, you know he sleeps on his side. Not like this, staring at the ceiling.

“Are you comfortable?” You ask, eyes already closed.

“Yeah.”

“Uhm...” Turning around just a little bit, you grab Daryl's arm, pulling it until he's on his side, letting his hand fall on your waist.

“The hell ya doin’?” He mutters.

“Just letting you I want you to hug me. So if you want it too... You can.”

Daryl stays motionless for a while until you feel as he fixes his position. You're glad he won't see your smile, the happiness spreading through your face. Getting the hint, you carefully push yourself back a little, closer to him. His hand brushes on your thigh, and he abruptly moves it away, startling you. Your heart sinks a little, wondering if he'll fall back into whatever he was before.

“What?” Your voice is weak, making it clear you're scared.

“What are ya wearing?”

Oh. You didn't think it would be an issue. “Underwear.” You whisper, shrugging your shoulders. “All my shorts are dirty so I didn't have anything else.”

“Ya shouldn't be dressed like that when ya have a man on yer bed.” The words come out too fast and a little confusing.

“Daryl, I feel completely fine being here with you. Even though I'm in panties.” Being honest, you decide to let your heart out. This will be easier if you just say things straight forward, as Carol said you should. “And...” Searching for his hand under the blankets, you slowly bring it to the top of your thigh. The sensation of his fingers on your skin is warm, despite his fingertips still being cold. “I want you to know that you can touch me. I don't mind.” You whisper, eyes closing to take in the feeling of his touch a little better. “Actually, you're... You're the only man I'll ever want to touch me.” Maybe it's the sleep, pushing these words out. Maybe it's the long time you had Daryl away, thinking he was done with you. You don't know. The words came out and there's no way to take them back. And you don't want to. It's the truth.

He doesn't say anything, he doesn't move. Not for a while. You're about to ask him to say something, anything, when you feel his hand moving. Slowly, very slowly, his thumb starts caressing your skin. It burns in a good way. His hand then slides down, gently, from the top of your thigh to your knee. You feel like he's testing it, not sure why. Maybe he thinks you'll just give up the idea, be suddenly disgusted by his touch. But that's so far from the truth.

“That's nice.” You decide to say, giving voice to what you're feeling, so he'll know.

“Huh.” He sounds like he doesn't believe you.

“It is.” To reassure him, you move even closer, until your back is pressed against his chest. “Believe me.”

“Alright then.” He removes his hand, but it comes to embrace your waist, his grip firm around you, holding you close to his body. “Go to sleep now, babygirl.”

“Good night, D.”

@funeral-7 @heyyy-hey-babyyy @twdeadfanfic @soraitmnt @winchester-angel @bvbwestfall @shawtygonemad @cameronsails @pulplorrd @browneyes528

#daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon imagine #imagine daryl dixon #daryl dixon #imagine the walking dead #the walking dead imagine #the walking dead fanfiction

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dawninlatin · 3 years

Text

Queen of Peace, chapter 13

A manorian high school AU

Words: 2563

AO3 Link

Masterlist

Summary: Manon Blackbeak is flawless, untouchable. From the outside at least. Her grandmother pushes her to achieve greatness, and she doesn’t let anyone get too close in fear of being hurt. How can anyone love her when not even her parents could?

Dorian Havilliard has always felt safe and confident around his friends. He might not have the greatest of families, but with Aelin and Chaol by his side, nothing can go wrong. That is until he tries keeping his greatest secret from them.

What will happen when Dorian and Manon gets to know one another? Can two lost souls find their way back together?

Oh, the queen of peace

Always does her best to please

But is it any use?

Somebody’s gotta lose

-Florence + The Machine, Queen of Peace

The music roared out of the speakers, and Manon moved her body to the rhythm, letting herself get lost in the upbeat tones. She had done this a dozen times by now, memorized this choreography weeks ago.

But then she turned to the right, and it wasn’t Asterin dancing beside her - as it had always been - it was Sorrel.

It startled her enough that she halted and messed up a few steps. Manon caught up with the others, but she was unable to pour her heart into it like she usually did. Her mind was too busy thinking about Asterin, worrying whether she was okay or not after their grandmother had kicked her out.

Manon had seen her at school a few times in the following weeks, but they hadn’t talked, and she doubted they would. Asterin probably hated her now, after all the horrible things Manon had said to her.

Getting kicked out is the least you deserve after getting yourself knocked up by a boy who will leave at the first sign of some real responsibility. Don’t come crawling to me when you find yourself homeless and heartbroken. You’re off the dance team, by the way.

Manon hadn’t meant what she said, not really, but maybe this was for the better…

Her grandmother had made it very clear that she was not to talk with Asterin anymore, and Asterin avoiding her, hating her, made everything much easier.

Yet, if it made things easier, why did it also make her so sad? The house had been awfully quiet these weeks, so quiet it was near-stifling. Manon hadn’t realized how different, how empty, home would be without Asterin there.

Stop moping around you sad, pathetic fool!

Manon mentally scolded herself, forcing her attention back to the dancing. She couldn’t keep letting this distract her. Asterin was simply an obstacle who no longer stood in the way of her future.

Finishing the rest of the choreography, she ignored the desperate, disappointed voice inside her head that whispered; you’re beginning to sound like her.

When the music faded into nothing and her body stopped moving, Manon put on her usual mask of cold, calculating boredom and turned towards her team. She immediately knew something was up, as they were all looking at her as if they had something to say, but didn’t dare say it.

«What,» Manon said, more an order than a question. If they had all decided to gang up against her, she only wanted to get it over with.

The girls exchanged wary glances, before Sorrel took a step forward and said, «We need Asterin on this choreo.» Manon was surprised when Vesta, who leaned against the wall with her arms crossed, stayed silent for once.

With a sigh, Manon answered Sorrel, «And why the hell do we need Asterin?»

Yet again did they all look at each other, as if this was something they’d discussed behind her back. The icy feeling of betrayal snaked its way up Manon’s spine.

«Because it’s always been the thirteen of us. We’re off-balance without Asterin.» It was Ghislaine who spoke this time.

«You’ve said it yourself,» Briar shot in from the back of the room. «If just one of us is missing, the entire team falls apart!»

It was when Vesta finally opened her mouth that she snapped. «And you slipped up today, Manon. Several times!»

«I have no idea what you’re talking about,» Manon hissed, clenching her fists so hard it hurt. «You have been distracted today, hell, you’ve been distracted, lazy and off-beat all week!»

«Because Asterin-» Vesta begun, but Manon didn’t let her finish.

«I don’t wanna hear another word about Asterin! It was her own stupidity that got her kicked off the team, and if you, all of you, don’t start working a bit harder, I won’t hesitate to replace you with someone else!»

The room was unbearably quiet when she was done talking, and Manon could hear her own heart thundering inside her chest. She had to stay calm, couldn’t let them see her fall apart, even if that was what she felt like doing right now. She was losing control, she was-

«I can talk to Asterin today if-»

«GET OUT!»

Manon’s blood was boiling at the audacity of Vesta. Why couldn’t they understand that Asterin, with her carelessness, was jeopardizing everything they had worked towards?

Her grandmother had been clear in her orders: everything had to be perfect, so they had to win nationals, which they couldn’t do when one of the teammates first of all didn’t bother showing up to half of the rehearsals, and second of all, would be heavily pregnant come spring.

When everyone had left, and Manon was alone once more, she didn’t let herself brood over the fight they’d just had, didn’t let herself recognize how awful this made her feel. She simply turned the music back on, and forgot.

She forgot everything she’d promised her grandmother, forgot the math test she’d butchered earlier today, forgot the fact that her whole dance team had probably just quit, forgot that she had no control over anything in her life anymore.

Yet as she kept moving her exhausted body, one thought remained. One of piercing blue eyes and soft lips.

And when she remembered that she had an actual date with him the next day, Manon smiled, despite everything.

«Why are you looking at me like that?»

How am I supposed to not look at you? Dorian wondered. Manon was radiant where she sat with her body leaned back, eyes closed, face tipped towards the sky. She was smiling softly, the autumn sun making her white-blonde hair glow.

Instead of telling her that, Dorian went with: «I’m just wondering what you’re thinking. You went quiet all of a sudden.»

She had. They’d been sitting here for hours now, under the huge oak tree in the park, eating and laughing and talking, but now she was silent, a calm, contemplating aura around her.

Manon hummed in answer, before opening her eyes and twisting towards him. «I’m just…savoring the moment, I guess.» Her mouth quirked to the side, the movement making her nose scrunch, and Dorian had to let out a chuckle.

«Now who’s the cliché?»

She’d been playfully mocking him for his picnic this whole time, even asking him if he was aware that they weren’t in every high school movie ever made. Dorian had begged to differ, telling her that the only reason it was a cliché, was because it worked.

And it did. After a while, Manon had reluctantly agreed that yes, maybe it was a little romantic. The admission had been accompanied by an eye-roll, of course, but what else could you expect?

«What time is it?» Manon asked after a moment.

Dorian scrambled for his phone, finding it half-lodged under the picnic basket. «It’s almost 3pm,» he said, marveling over how much time had passed. He could spend all day like this, just talking about all and nothing with Manon. No matter what they discussed, she surprised him with her answers, whether it be a funny joke or an unusually deep thought, offering a new perspective on things.

«I should head home soon,» she sighed, but Manon made no sign of getting up. Instead she laid down, Dorian joining her. «My grandmother will start to ask questions if I’m late.»

From what he’d gathered, Manon’s grandmother was very strict, especially when it came to boys, and Manon had told her she was studying at the library today. She rarely talked about her family, and whenever they touched on the subject, she quickly started talking about something else. Dorian knew not to ask questions, though. She would open up when and if she was ready, and those moments often came at the most unexpected times.

«I had a lot of fun today, you know. Even if I still think you just googled date ideas and went with the first hit.» Dorian laughed at that, his stomach filling with what could only be described as butterflies.

«Does that mean you would want to do it again?» They were lying on their backs, face to face, and all Dorian could think about was how badly he wanted to kiss her.

It had been weeks since their kiss in the library, but they hadn’t been able to do it again. All they’d gotten was stolen moments in between classes and late-night texts, their busy schedules making sure of that. Until now, that was.

«I would love to,» Manon offered, answering his question. «But next time I decide what we’re doing.»

«Deal,» Dorian grinned, his eyes staying fixed on her lips as she spoke.

Moments passed, the tension between them tangible, and then Manon whispered, «Is it weird that I really wanna kiss you right now?»

That was all it took for Dorian to crash his lips into hers.

The kiss was exploring at first, her lips so soft and so perfect. He’d thought about their moment in the library constantly in the past weeks, but his memory could never do it justice, he knew now. This was the real thing, the real Manon, and she was bewitching. No other word could describe the experience that was kissing her.

Dorian pulled her closer, and Manon placed her hands in his hair. He had to continuously remind himself that they were outside, in the middle of a park, and anyone could walk by at any moment.

Yet he couldn’t stop either. Their mouths had gone from searching to ravenous, both of them trying to get closer to the other. Manon nudged him with her tongue, and he opened up for her, the taste of her exquisite.

His blood heated, skin becoming incredibly tight all of a sudden. He could keep doing this forever.

But they had to pull apart at some point to simply just breathe. And they did.

Manon let her forehead rest against his as they both panted slightly, Dorian reaching up to brush a strand of hair out of her face. «I really should go now,» she murmured against his lips, leaning in to kiss him once more.

It was Dorian who pulled away this time, stroking her cheek. «I’ll see you later then.»

«Yeah,» she sighed, standing up in one smooth movement. The air around Dorian suddenly became unbearably cold.

After Manon had picked up her jacket, ready to leave, she halted for a moment, and said, «I meant it when I said today was fun.»

Then she leaned down to place a swift kiss on his cheek, stood back up and walked away, leaving him alone, all flustered.

Dorian had to wait a moment before he could get up himself, because his pants had just become very tight. His face was burning at the fact, but he forced himself to think of dead puppies and his parents fighting and his gym teacher in those tiny shorts he insisted on wearing.

That last image was particularly horrifying, but it seemed to do the trick. Then, Dorian picked up his phone, only to find fifty new messages from Aelin in their group chat.

Sighing, he began to skim through the thread.

Aelin: Do you guys have plans for today?

Aelin: Rowan is busy

Aelin: And I’m bored

Aelin: Hellooooo

Chaol: I’m guessing I have plans now…

Aelin: I can actually hear how hard you’re sighing right now Chaol

Aelin: We’re seeing a movie today

Chaol: When?

Then there was a lot of planning back and forth, and both Chaol and Aelin trying to reach Dorian. The last message he got was a selfie of his best friends glaring at him, the text reading: Come hang out with us loser.

So Dorian stood, feeling lighter than ever, and began calling Aelin to hear where they were.

Stepping into the narrow hallway of her home, Manon carefully closed the door behind her, trying to stay as quiet as possible in case her grandmother was working.

She hung her coat on the rack and turned her phone on silent. She rarely got any notifications, but that was before Dorian. Now they sent messages back and forth at all hours, most of it silly nonsense.

«Manon, is that you?» her grandmother called from the kitchen. Letting out a shaky breath, Manon made her facial expression that of someone who had studied in a library for hours and definitely hadn’t just made out with a hot boy.

Listen to yourself, you sound like some lovesick girl from those movies you hate so much, Manon mentally yelled, rolling her eyes at how annoying her internal monologue was becoming.

«Yeah, I’m back.» She stopped by the doorway to the kitchen on the way to her room, where her grandmother was sitting by the table, laptop open in front of her.

The woman glanced up at the clock on the wall, before looking back at Manon, her eyes searching. «You stayed at the library for a long time.»

Manon had to fight to stay fully still, to not flinch at her grandmothers words. She couldn’t know, could she? Putting on a fake smile, Manon said, «I just got into a really good workflow, didn’t wanna quit.»

Her breaths were getting faster, and she could feel the panic sneaking up on her.

Just keep it together until you’re alone! She always asks questions like these.

«I’m almost done with the history assignment,» she added to make sure her grandmother bought it. Even if it was all a lie. She hadn’t even started on the history paper.

«Good. I already made dinner, but there are some leftovers in the fridge if you’re hungry.» Her grandmother’s tone was pleasant, almost happy. She had to be in a good mood today, then. The whole thing felt deeply unsettling.

At least she was safe, for now.

«Thanks, but I’m not hungry. I’ll be in my room,» Manon said before turning and hurrying down the hall. Once she’d closed the door, she finally let out the breath of relief she’d benne holding, throwing away all pretense.

She couldn’t keep lying to her grandmother like this…

Not only did it make her feel awful, but the consequences would also be too great. She was putting her whole future at risk when she was acting like this, sneaking around and prioritizing boys over her schoolwork.

Frustrated, she threw herself down on her bed, startling Abraxos who was sleeping on her pillow. Dorian made everything so much more complicated. Agreeing to go out with him had been a mistake. A huge, huge mistake.

Yet she’d felt better today, happier, than she’d had in a long time. She’d even managed to forget the catastrophe that was her dance team, if only for a few hours. And with this light, fluttery feeling, everything seemed more manageable.

For now, she could do this, wanted to do this. The thought of not being with Dorian anymore… It didn’t feel right, and she was actually looking forward to Monday, when she would see him again.

She knew this, they, would have to end one way or another, but she couldn’t let go just yet.

A/N: That break really got longer than I anticipated...

It's been nearly a year now, since I first got the idea for this fic and started writing it, and here I was, believing I could be done with it by summer 2020. In all honesty, it feels like I posted chapter 12, blinked, and then 4 months had passed. But here it is, at least:) We have reached the halfway point, and a little progress is better than none. I'm still not making any promises regarding this fic, other than I will finish it, someday, whether that be in 2 months or 2 years. And to all of you who still read, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU SO MUCH<3<3 I could not have done it without you!

All the love, Aurora<3

Taglist: @fireheartdreamerstarborn @bookishwitchling @hellasblessed @kit-12 @onfma @ireallyshouldsleeprn @sayosdreams @rowaelinismyotp

I keep a separate taglist for each ship, so let me know if you want to be on any of them!

#dawninlatin QoP #manorian #manorian fic #manorian fanfiction #manorian au #manon x dorian #dorian x manon #manon blackbeak #dorian havilliard #sjm #sarah j maas #throne of glass #tog #throne of glass au

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