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g1rld1ary · 11 months ago

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5 people james didn't mean to kiss (and one he did) ; james potter x fem!reader

➻ first james fic!! i love reviving old fanfic trends <33

➻ word count: 4494

➻ synopsis: says it on the tin baby!

➻ warnings: swearing, allusions to sex/dirty jokes, era typical homophobia (basically nonexistent)

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James Potter was a very affectionate person, everyone knew that. His love language was absolutely physical touch — everyone knew that too. It was also assumed, therefore, that James Potter had an extensive list of kisses. That assumption wasn’t necessarily wrong, but a good chunk of them weren’t exactly what you imagined when thinking of the great James Potter kissing someone. They were often impulsive when he didn’t know how else to express his feelings. His very first kiss, for example, wasn’t exactly the cheesy, romantic soap opera that he often advertised providing for girls.

Sirius Black

The Marauders sat in their dorm room, early on in second year. While first year was packed with ridiculous adventures and the forming of their friendship group, second year brought a new awareness of girls, romance and especially kissing. That was the topic of discussion as the boys all packed into one bed, hypothesising about what it might be like. James and Sirius led the discussion with much bravado and false confidence whilst Peter looked decidedly scared. Remus, to his credit, just looked rather amused at it all.

“But where do you touch her?” James asked, eyes still wide and innocent and twelve years old, “I can’t just stand there with my hands at my sides like a twat!”

“Don’t be stupid, you hold her like this.” Sirius bent his arms in a direction that looked borderline painful. Remus huffed and climbed off the bed, pulling both the boys with him.

“If you’re gonna kiss a girl,” Remus instructed, “You have to hold her gently. Don’t push her around like she’s dead weight. James, put your arms around Sirius’ waist like that, now Sirius, you put your arms around his neck.”

“Pete’s gonna think we’re bent,” Sirius grumbled, a red hue on his cheeks.

“You are bent, you poof,” Peter quipped from his spot on the bed. He was right, of course, but that wouldn’t come to light until fourth year. James thought this was hilarious though, and began miming exaggerated — rather sloppy — kisses. And since James never failed to cure Sirius of his moods, he did the same. Remus rolled his eyes as the two boys acted out a passionate scene, loose tongues and all, until they were no longer acting.

All four boys in the dorm were frozen as James and Sirius’ mouths had accidentally connected in their stupidity, none of them sure what to do. Seconds passed as the two stood, lips locked against each other, no one daring to move. At least, until Remus let out a long, uncharacteristic wheeze, which dissolved into a fit of giggles that he would usually be mortified by, but there was no way he was outdoing the kiss anytime soon. Peter followed along momentarily, laughing so hard barely any sound actually came out, silent heaves punctuated by gasping breaths.

Released from their stupor both boys leapt apart, wiping their mouths with their forearms. Both had comical expressions of disgust, still slightly too stunned to verbalise any of it.

“We,” James heaved, “Can never speak of this again. Ever.” Sirius agreed in a heartbeat, still unable to completely wipe the blush from his pale complexion. He probably would have dwelled on those feelings if James wasn’t James, beginning to see the humour in it soon enough. By the end of the night it was an inside joke that would proceed to be referenced countless times within the walls of Hogwarts.

So although James would tell the story of his first kiss quite differently — he alleged it was with a Ravenclaw named Keeley a few weeks later, his proper first kiss will always have been with one Sirius Black in the Gryffindor dormitories on an otherwise unassuming Tuesday evening. And that secret was held onto dearly by all four marauders until, of course, Sirius’ best man speech at James’ wedding, where the anecdote received uproarious applause, loudest of all by James himself.

2. Remus Lupin

The Marauders had all known about Remus’ ‘furry little problem’ since their second year — first for the most perceptive of the bunch. Nevertheless, the group were insistent in helping Remus in any way they could, though it was a difficult task when his alter ego had no resistance to killing them. Until Sirius had come to them with the idea of becoming animagi. It was difficult no doubt, advanced magic far beyond the teaching at Hogwarts, but the four of them were exceptional wizards each in their own way, and the project seemed somewhat manageable with four brains chipping away at it over the course of two years.

When they finally did get it, hardly any of them could believe it, least of all Remus. He had never imagined that the human side of him was worthy of this much love and devotion, let alone the monster within him. However, despite how they tried to play it off, the achievement didn’t come easily to any of them. Sirius was the first to get it, big black dog accompanying the group around the castle and becoming an unexpected staple of the Gryffindor common room. You in particular liked to cuddle up with him on the couch and spoil him with head scratches when you were stressed from school — at least until the secret was revealed and you hit him upside his human head for deceiving you.

James was second to get it, though much less gracefully than Sirius. The whole group of Gryffindors had been hanging out together down by the Black Lake, enjoying the slowly warming weather after class one day. James had the misfortune of being sat between you and Lily, which made things very confusing for his hormonal body and brain. His eyes were trained on his hands, too afraid to actually talk to either of you and embarrass himself which was what usually happened. You and Lily, however, were hell bent on making that occur. While James had had a well known crush on Lily for the last few years, ever since you’d come back to school that year post-puberty you could both tell that James was both emotionally and physically confused. You both delighted in this and used it to your advantage, Lily finding him the most annoying man on earth and you delighting in his flustered expressions (secretly finding him actually pretty cute).

After thirty minutes of torture, James couldn’t take it. You’d made one too many dirty jokes directed at him and he was a blushing mess, fidgeting awkwardly between you and Lily laughing gleefully. He excused himself quickly and uncharacteristically quietly, hurrying off to be out of sight of his friends. You all laughed as you watched him go, and Remus reluctantly stood, muttering something about making sure James didn’t drive himself crazy.

Remus headed straight to the Forbidden Forest, knowing the privacy would be what James desired in the moment. Sure enough there he was, taking a moment to breathe against a tree.

“Easy there, Potter, don’t cum in your pants,” He joked, obviously amused by the whole ordeal. James turned quickly, devastated at Remus seeing him so sexually frustrated.

“Sod off, Lupin. It’s not my fault! They both just sit there looking so fucking good, talking about all these unholy things and you expect me to just be fine with it? It’s so—” Instead of the exasperated groan Remus expected, he was met with a stag standing tall in front of him. He couldn’t help his mouth dropping open, the animal far more magnificent than he could have expected out of the fourteen year old boy.

In a weird shift of figure the deer was back to boy, and James only had a moment of shocked stillness before he was whooping and yelling in the grass. Remus joined him, the two of them yelling and dancing around like idiots in their joy. James pulled him in for a hug, appropriately masculine until he pressed a kiss onto Remus’ lips, still grinning ecstatically as they pulled away. Remus scowled in a way he hoped was convincing.

“I hate it when you do that, Potter,” He grumbled as the two of them returned to their friends.

“Yeah, right,” James laughed, pushing his glasses up his nose. “It’s a blessing to be kissed by my sexy arse.”

3. Peter Pettigrew

While all four of the Marauders were undoubtedly exceptional wizards, that didn’t always translate into their grades. For example, being so ahead in the curriculum made James Potter get lazy, often submitting subpar essays simply because he figured it was already common knowledge and he was more interested in higher level magic. He always ended up with top grades from outstanding extra credit projects, but the point still stood.

Peter was similarly a great wizard. Perhaps not so much a prodigy like James or Sirius, and didn’t dominate the class ranks like Remus, but he did well for himself and was pretty exceptional in Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures. However, he was failing History of Magic. All four of them had chosen the subject for their OWLs, assuming it would be an easy O because of the ghost professor. They couldn’t be more wrong. Binns was a useless teacher and Peter especially found it difficult to teach himself the material just from the textbook, and was falling dreadfully behind, each essay earning a worse grade than the last.

James had offered to help tutor him before their exams, and the two buckled down in the library almost every day in the weeks leading up to exam season. Peter made pretty good progress, eager to catch up with his friends and prove he was on their level. Still, everyone was nervous for the test and its outcome.

When results were released, you and the Gryffindors were all together. Whilst you and the girls all got the reveal over and done with, the boys all waited with bated breaths. Most of the grades weren’t shocking — three of them knew they could easily get top grades from the little effort they put in, but they were all waiting on Peter’s History of Magic grade. The blond boy opened his paper with shaky hands, eyes scanning frantically over the information contained. Slowly he raised his head, nervous smile apparent.

“I got an A,” He said, and within an instant the boys were on top of him, congratulating him with strong hugs or by clapping him on the back. James grabbed both of his cheeks, pressing them together and pushing a kiss onto Peter’s lips.

“Prongs!” Peter moaned, pushing his face away half-heartedly.

“I’m just proud of you, Wormtail,” He cooed, appearing much like his mother whom you all adored.

“Oi, Potter,” You interrupted, waving your sheet of results around. “I got an O in Potions — where’s my kiss?” James immediately broke your eye contact, and you pretended you weren’t charmed by his embarrassed little smile. He mumbled a response that had his friends ripping him to shreds, egging him on whilst simultaneously teasing him and his alleged manhood. He pressed a gentle peck to your forehead and you raised an eyebrow.

“Not what I meant, but ok.”

4. Regulus Black

Regulus Black had a difficult relationship with the Marauders, to say the very least. By his fifth year — the rest of the boys’ sixth — Sirius had been at the Potter’s for months and Regulus was still reeling from the impact. He was noticeably quieter and more sombre than in years previous, and a dangerous resentment for his brother and his friends bubbled under his skin.

James Potter connected these dots quickly. However, he didn’t really know what to do about it. He wasn’t sorry that Sirius was living with him, but he didn’t like that Regulus was left all alone with their wicked parents, regardless of their personal differences. That brought James to you.

You sat together on the couch, his head resting next to your thighs, curls just brushing against your skin in a way that you couldn’t stop thinking about. He was lamenting about his mental struggles as you worked on your crochet, thinking quietly as he rambled on.

“Why don’t you just talk to him?” You asked suddenly, and James tilted his head to look up at you, holding back his laughter at your upside down appearance.

“What?” He asked, “I can’t talk to him, he hates me!”

“When has that ever stopped you before? Lily hates you and yet you bother her all the time,” You said, smile playing on your lips.

“That’s not true!” James protested, “I don’t bother her that much anymore!” You rolled your eyes playfully and turned back to your craft as James continued to ponder the situation.

As usual, he decided you were right. And so he sent a short letter to Regulus, asking for a meeting on the Astronomy tower at midnight. Surprisingly he’d agreed, and the two boys were standing awkwardly across each other on the tower. Regulus refused to start the conversation and so stood in silence, staring down James in an effort to scare him off. James wouldn’t be deterred.

“I just wanted to talk about what happened last year,” He said, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose nervously.

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“C’mon. I know we’re not friends, but I also figured none of your friends are the talking type either. So, I thought you could talk to me — full confidentiality. I don’t know, blame me, yell at me, I just don’t want you to do this all by yourself.”

“How sweet, Potter,” He sneered, “But I don’t need to talk about any of my feelings.”

James Potter was nothing if not persistent.

“Ok, well if you don’t want to talk, how about you listen?” To his surprise, Regulus stayed. One perfect eyebrow raised, he slowly sat next to James, legs dangling over the edge of the tower. After a gesture for him to go on, James started. He began to talk about the process of having Sirius live with him, the feelings they both had about it, and the guilt they both felt about leaving Regulus alone. At that Regulus looked up, eyes pooling with hope.

Then without any warning, Regulus was talking more than James had ever heard before, spilling what he supposed must have been the younger boy’s darkest secrets and vulnerabilities. James was unprepared, not actually expecting him to engage. At one point James had put a comforting arm around Regulus’ shoulder, words failing to express any of the feelings he had inside. Regulus didn’t pull away as James expected, instead only starting to cry. James just watched in disbelief as Regulus cried into his chest. Awkwardly, James arranged himself to press a gentle kiss to Regulus’ forehead right as Regulus moved to look up and speak, resulting in a ridiculous kiss between the two of them.

They jumped apart in less than a second, both with horrified looks on their faces.

“Oh my God—”

“That was an accident I swear—”

“I’m really sorry—”

“I was just trying to comfort you—”

Both boys stumbled over their words as they clambered up to their feet, putting a strictly heterosexual amount of space between them.

“Um, I’m just gonna go,” Regulus settled on, backing up towards the door.

“I’m seriously sorry, Black. It’s just something I do — doesn’t usually backfire like that.” Regulus just nodded, leaving quickly.

“Potter?” He stopped halfway through the door and James looked up. “Thanks.” James didn’t get any time to reply as Regulus was long gone, leaving him to cringe on his own. Neither of them would be telling anybody about the incident. Ever.

5. Lily Evans

You and James had been doing your will-they-won’t-they thing for a long time. Not quite since you met, but once you’d both started to notice the opposite sex you’d been participating in a battle of who could resist the longest. Teasing and cajoling were staples of your relationship. Whilst it had started as a way to pass the time; James had been in love with Lily since second year and you just liked to tease, at some point the feelings crossed over into a real and dangerous territory. However, neither of you wanted to do anything in case the feelings weren’t reciprocated, and truthfully hadn’t realised the true depth of them.

You and James were the only ones not to see the obvious: the feelings were absolutely reciprocated. It was tearing your friends apart, trying to get one of you to finally confess before you finished school forever. There were bets in place, pep talks and everything else the Gryffindors could think of to finally cause the event they’d been hoping for. Eventually, Lily had had enough.

One day you were all hanging out in your dormitory, most of you doing your homework and Marlene fiddling with a record player, trying to get it to come back to life.

“So, what would you guys think if I gave James a chance?” Lily asked, too coy to be genuine, but you were caught off-guard enough that you didn’t notice. “I mean, I know I’ve said some terrible things over the years, but now that he’s backed off he’s actually a really nice guy.”

“But… James?” You asked incredulously, essay immediately forgotten.

“Yeah, why not? He’s the hottest guy in our year, and if all goes to shit it’s only a few months until we graduate and I’ll never have to see him again.”

“But it’s James!” The rest of the girls had caught on to what Lily was scheming and delighted in joining in.

“Why shouldn’t she? It’s not like you like him, right?” Mary asked, studying your expressions. You hesitated for a moment, trying to find the right words. And just when they thought Lily had finally succeeded in getting the ball rolling you answered: “No, of course not. You go ahead, Lils.”

What started as a ploy to get you to admit your feelings only snowballed from there when Lily realised she couldn’t just back out now. And so she hatched a plan. Everything was going perfectly; Sirius and Remus had made sure the common room was devoid of younger students so no unhelpful rumours could be spread, and Marlene had been hanging out with you all evening to make sure you stuck to the schedule she’d devised.

With perfect precision, you and Marlene entered through the portrait just as Lily came down from the dorms.

“Hey, Potter,” She called, and James looked up curiously from his game of wizard’s chess. The redhead marched over to him, cupping both of his cheeks and kissing him strongly. Your jaw dropped open. You couldn’t believe Lily was just going for it like that, but even more you couldn’t believe the sick feeling creeping up from your stomach. You looked at Marlene, who only looked marginally less shocked. A glance around the room proved similar. Although they all knew Lily’s plan, it was two entirely different things to hear about her scheme to get the two of you together and seeing Lily Evans kissing James Potter.

“I’ve, uh, gotta go,” You mumbled, somehow finding your footing to run from the room, desperate to get anywhere where you didn’t have to see that, and the subsequent (or so you believed) union of a happy couple.

Lily pulled away from the kiss, eyes immediately trying to find you and she was puzzled when she couldn’t. A look at Marlene told her all she needed to know and her heart sank; she’d failed. James was looking a little more dazed than the head girl, and suddenly looked terribly awkward in his seat.

“Look, Lils. Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t feel that way about you anymore. There’s— there’s someone else, and I, I have to go.” With that James headed up to his dormitory, and the rest of your friends stood in a thick silence for several moments.

“I think I just made everything worse,” Lily said, and then the chaos started.

“What the fuck did you think was going to happen?” Sirius asked loudly, running a stressed hand through his hair.

“I don’t know! I just figured maybe they’d have an epiphany and both realise they’d rather be kissing each other!” Lily cried, throwing herself into an armchair.

You

Lily was right, she’d unintentionally made everything worse. You were upset at what you’d seen and the story you’d attributed to it, and even more so at your terribly timed realisation of your feelings. Because of this you’d started avoiding James in an effort to get over him, which only made you more miserable that you couldn’t talk to your favourite person. James, in turn, hadn’t seen you enter the common room on the night of the kiss and so believed —and dearly hoped — that you were blissfully ignorant, and so was equally perplexed and distraught at the space between you. He’d tried to approach you about it but you evaded him or turned him away every time.

“Hey, love, can we please—”

“It’s fine, James,” You interrupted him, “It was all just a bit of fun, right? All the flirting, the being touchy. But now you’re with Lily and I’ll back off, I get it, don’t worry. I wish you two every happiness.” You tried to sound as genuine as you could while sadness bit at your heart, and left James standing astounded in the corridor. Now he knew that you’d seen the kiss the issue was obvious, but the solution remained a mystery to him.

You’d taken to Marlene to get your feelings out, and she listened patiently as you rattled off a monologue about your childish jealousy and broken heart. Luckily, she’d discussed how to handle this with Lily — who knew you wouldn’t go to her because of her alleged involvement with James, and set off (hopefully) your friend’s last attempt to get you two together. She finally shook you out of it, frustrated with the lack of action.

“They’re not together,” She said, stopping you in your tracks.

“What?”

“They’re not together,” She repeated, making intense eye contact with you. “It was all this dumb plan Lily had to get the two of you together. She thought if you saw James getting with someone else you’d finally realise your feelings for him. And you did, but you were supposed to stick around to hear Potter reject her and say that he liked someone else, you.” You were shocked into silence, what could you say to that?

“So,” You started carefully, “What do I do now?”

James was in a similar situation with the boys.

“She saw Lily kiss me and now she thinks I like Lily when I like her! Plus, she won’t even be in my presence long enough for me to explain that it’s all just this huge misunderstanding and it’s her I want to be snogging!” James lay dramatically across his bed as the boys sighed.

“Prongs, isn’t it obvious?” Sirius asked and James cocked his head to the side, looking remarkably like a confused puppy. “Do something she can’t ignore. Make a grand gesture to prove your feelings for her.” James thought about it, it made sense. If you wouldn’t hear his explanation, he’d just have to make you.

“How?”

You and James went into the following Saturday with the same goal. It was Gryffindor’s quidditch semi-final, so there was a party being held whatever the outcome. It would be the first time you’d see each other since you’d realised your mistake since training was taking up all of James’ time.

Gryffindor had won, thankfully, which had both of you in higher spirits. The party was already in full swing by the time you got there, opting for a smoke first to calm your nerves. You’d spotted James almost as soon as you entered, always the heart and soul of a party. You marched towards him with a purpose, but as soon as he set eyes on you he jumped up to stand on a table. Someone had lowered the volume of the music — not silent, but low enough so you could hear him yelling over it. He said your full name, clearly and intentionally in a way that had surrounding people look at you curiously.

“I love you,” He said suddenly. “I am in love with you, not anyone else, and whatever made you think that’s not true was just a huge misunderstanding. Because I love you so much, and all I want to do is snog you until I’m the only name you remember, baby.” You let out a short laugh at his vulgarity and the cocky smirk that accompanied it, but a cheek-splitting smile won out when you thought about the preceding words and the sincerity he’d instilled in them. Before you even knew what you were doing you were racing towards him, gratefully taking Peter’s hand to join James on the table.

You honestly couldn’t tell who had initiated the kiss, but you were suddenly so intimately joined together it was like all the air had been sucked out of your lungs, compressing your body in an effort to fuse to his. His strong arms around you couldn’t shield you from the confetti being thrown around (for the match, of course, not just your kiss), nor the catcalls of your friends. You only pulled away when you felt James’ tongue start exploring a little too far, mindful that half the people you knew were watching. You wore matching grins as you parted, foreheads still pressed together and breathing heavy.

While it might have taken four years, innumerable (accidental) kisses and one failed set-up plan to get there, you were sure in your heart that James Potter was the only boy you ever wanted to kiss. And so you did, over and over for the years to come, and you cheered and applauded enthusiastically as the seemingly never ending list of friends and family told stories of receiving a coveted James Potter kiss throughout the years, knowing you were the only one who got to be his bride.

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mimimarvelingmarvel · 4 months ago

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time bound part eleven

pairing: worst wolverine!logan howlett x f!mutant!reader

Part Eleven - Masterlist

summary: Y/n’s life takes a dramatic turn when the Time Variance Authority intervenes, pulling her from a critical moment in her timeline. The TVA sends her to the void where she eventually meets with Deadpool and a very familiar face. With Deadpool's universe in the balance, alongside his reluctant would-be pal, Wolverine, and the enigmatic time-bending mutant known as the Veil, the trio must complete the mission and save Deadpool’s world from an existential threat.

overall warnings: 18+, Fem!Reader, AFAB Reader, Use of Y/N, Her X-Men name is Veil, She/her pronouns, Swearing, Angst, Heavy Violence, Character Death, Deadpool (he’s his own warning), Hurt, Fluff, Angst, Eventual Smut, Slow Burn, TVA

word count: 2.7k

a/n: longest and saddest chapter x

After we unceremoniously crash-land on a guy named Pete’s KIA he was attempting to sell, the impact crumpling the hood like a tin can, the sound of screeching metal echoes through the air, drowning out the distant city noise. Pete looks delighted to see Wade, something I never thought I would see. Wade gives him a quick recap before we are on the run, following him as he takes us towards the TVA.

As we walk down the bustling street, the chaotic sounds of the city engulf us—honking cars, distant chatter, and the occasional siren blaring in the distance. The air is thick with the smell of street food, a mixture of hot dogs, pretzels, and something sweet like roasted nuts. The vibrant life around me feels surreal, almost too good to be true after months trapped in that nightmarish place, where the only sounds were the howling winds and the distant echoes of something monstrous.

I notice a man in a dishevelled suit barreling toward us, his tie askew, and his face a mask of desperation and fear. Sweat beads on his forehead and his wild eyes lock onto us with an intensity that sends a shiver down my spine. His nose is broken and I hear Wade giggle beside me, no doubt his doing.

His voice cracks as he shouts, "No, stop, piss off, you’re too late." His voice is tinged with both panic and resignation as if he knows he’s already lost but can’t help fighting against the inevitable.

Logan’s muscles tense, and his voice drops to a growl, deep and menacing like a wolf ready to pounce. His hands curl into fists, the veins in his forearms bulging. "You’re fucking done," he snarls, each word laced with venom.

I glance at the stranger, confusion and wariness gnawing at me. "Who the fuck is this?" I demand, my voice harsher than I intended. The man’s presence feels wrong, like a puzzle piece that doesn’t quite fit.

His face pales further, his voice trembling with the weight of whatever horror he’s seen. “You brought another Veil to this world? She was supposed to stay in the Void.” His eyes dart around.

"Zip it. Why was Thor crying?" Wade cuts in, his tone is light, mocking, but there’s an edge to it.

Paradox’s fear transforms into righteous indignation, his voice rising in a feeble attempt to regain control. “How dare you? No one comes back from The Void.” His hands twitch at his sides, as if he’s debating whether to fight or flee.

Wolverine’s growl deepens, the sound rumbling in his chest like a storm about to break. His eyes narrow, the cold fury in them unmistakable. "Tell that to Cassandra Nolva."

A sudden whirl of light and energy erupts behind us, the air crackling with raw power. I whip around just in time to see Pyro step through a swirling portal, his expression grim, his eyes shadowed with the burden of bad news. “Paradox, we have a problem,” he says, his voice low and urgent, as if he’s trying to contain the disaster that’s about to unfold.

Before anyone can react, Paradox’s neck snaps violently to the side with a sickening crunch, the sound echoing in the still air like a death knell. His body drops like a marionette whose strings have been cut, crumpling to the ground in a lifeless heap, his eyes staring blankly at nothing as Cassandra steps out from the portal, a cold smirk on her lips. Her eyes gleam with a malevolent intelligence, as if she’s always two steps ahead of everyone else.

Cassandra’s voice drips with malice, each word carefully enunciated as if savoring the moment. "Paradox? You tried to kill me."

Paradox’s voice shakes, a pathetic whimper escaping his lips, his once confident demeanor shattered. “I literally have no idea…” His words trail off into a pitiful whisper, his fear tangible in the air. Her hand, pale and elegant, wraps around his brain beneath the skin. “You come for the king, you better kill the king,” she says, her voice a deadly whisper that sends chills down my spine.

Deadpool grins wickedly, his teeth flashing in the dim light. "Oh, welcome to the skull-fuck club, Paradox. You know she doesn’t wash that hand." His tone is mocking.

Cassandra tilts her head, examining the man with detached curiosity, as if he’s nothing more than a specimen under a microscope. "Oh, what’s this? A Time-Ripper, you naughty boy," she murmurs, her voice a mixture of amusement and disdain.

"Oh no, we’re on it. We’re gonna head down and dismantle that thing now. We got you, boo; you just keep playing those keys." Wade flashes a playful wink.

Cassandra’s eyes narrow, a dangerous gleam in them as she steps closer, her presence suffocating. "I don’t want to destroy it. I want to use it." Her voice is laced with greed, a hunger for power that sends a jolt of fear through me.

My heart clenches in my chest as Cassandra’s gaze locks onto me, her power reaching out, invisible but suffocating. I gasp as I’m yanked off my feet, the force of her magic slamming me back into Logan’s chest. The impact is brutal, knocking the air from my lungs and sending us both crashing through a bakery window. The glass shatters around us, sharp shards slicing through the air like deadly confetti. The scent of fresh bread and sugar mingles with the coppery tang of blood, creating a nauseating cocktail that makes my head spin.

The impact knocks the wind out of me, and I struggle to breathe, my lungs burning as I gasp for air. Dust and debris swirl around us, and I manage to whisper, "Fuck," as I roll off Logan, wincing at the pain radiating through my body. My skin stings where the glass has cut me, and I can feel warm blood trickling down my arms and face.

Wade shakes off the dust, standing up with a grimace, his usual cocky swagger subdued. "You okay, Pumpkin?" he asks, his tone surprisingly gentle, concern flickering in his eyes.

I grunt, forcing myself to stand on shaky legs, every muscle screaming in protest. "Never better." My voice is hoarse, and I can feel the weight of exhaustion pressing down on me, but I push it aside. My eyes scan the chaotic scene outside, where people are running in every direction, their screams of terror echoing off the buildings. "I’m going to go stop her."

Logan tries to grab me, his fingers grazing my arm, but Wade holds him back, a rare seriousness in his eyes. "We’ve got other problems to deal with, buddy. Pumpkin’s got this, our little time ripper." He glances at me, a knowing look crossing his face, his expression almost… proud? "Oops—spoilers." He says to some unknown thing in the distance.

I shrug him off, giving Logan one last look, a silent plea in my eyes, before jogging toward the subway entrance. The stairs are steep and narrow, the fluorescent lights flickering overhead, casting everything in a sickly yellow hue. The tunnel is dark, the air heavy with the scent of metal and something more sinister, something that makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. As I descend deeper, the sounds of the city fade away, replaced by the ominous hum of the machines below.

Paradox sits in a chair in the control room, his hands gripping the armrests so tightly his knuckles are white. His face is a mask of terror, his eyes wide and unblinking as he watches the screens in front of him.

"You dumb shit," I seethe, grabbing his shoulder and spinning him to face me. His eyes are wide, filled with the kind of fear that only comes when you realize you’ve truly fucked up. "What have you done?" My voice

I look up at the machines, their screens flashing erratically as Cassandra wreaks havoc on the timelines. Each beep and whirr of the machinery seems to punctuate the gravity of the situation, the digital displays a chaotic dance of numbers and warnings. “She’s going to destroy the whole existence of timelines until just the Void remains,” He says, his face pale and trembling.

“Fuck,” I mutter, my voice barely above a breath.

“You can stop her.” I look to him, hopeful. “That’s what’s so dangerous about you, but if you do that, you’ll die.” The weight of his words hits me like a physical blow. My heart pounds in my chest, and I stare into his eyes, searching for some hint of hope or another solution.

“You idiots didn’t make a failsafe?” My voice is sharp with frustration and fear.

Paradox nods, his eyes wide with terror. “But she’s the closest one to it. This is the only way.”

I shiver as the realization sinks in. The thought of my own death is a cold, hard reality that shakes me to my core. If I do this, I’m gone. But if I don’t, everyone else dies. My mind races with the enormity of the choice before me.

“Tell me what I have to do.”

Paradox, trembling, presses a small button on a console. A video screen flickers to life, displaying a grainy, distorted image of the control systems. “You have to bridge the gap between the two feeds of matter and anti-matter. It will implode the time ripper, killing Cassandra… and you.”

My breath catches in my throat, a shaky exhale escaping my lips. “If you see Logan, tell him I’m sorry.” I step away, my legs feeling heavy and leaden. “Where is it?”

He points shakily toward the lower levels. I nod, turning toward the stairs, each step feeling like a mile as I make my way to the feeder room. The weight of the impending sacrifice presses down on me, and I try to steady my shaking hands. My heart races as I think of the life I’m leaving behind, the people I’m leaving behind.

As I descend, the cool, musty air of the stairwell wraps around me, each step echoing in the silence. I can feel tears pricking at the corners of my eyes, memories flashing before me. The joyous moments, the regrets, and the lingering fear of leaving Logan behind. The thought of not having a legacy, of leaving without making a mark, terrifies me.

At the bottom of the stairs, a long hallway stretches out before me, lit by flickering lights that cast eerie shadows on the walls. I pause at the end, my gaze fixed on the door ahead. The lights behind the glass window flicker and pulse, mirroring the turmoil within me. I take a step forward, but my knee buckles, and I hit the ground, a vision of blinding white light assaulting my eyes. The intensity of it nearly overwhelms me, but it fades as quickly as it came.

I try to sit up, my body trembling with fear. I need to do this. I force myself to stand, my hand reaching for the door. Just as I’m about to push it open, a voice echoes down the hallway, stopping me in my tracks.

I hear my name cut through the tension like a blade. “Y/N!”

My heart leaps into my throat, a jolt of adrenaline making me spin around. Logan is rushing toward me, his face a storm of fear and determination. His eyes, usually so controlled, are wide with panic and desperation. Behind him, Wade follows, his usual irreverent demeanor replaced by a rare, somber resolve.

“What are you doing?” Logan's voice is a mix of terror and disbelief, his eyes locking onto mine with an intensity that makes my resolve waver.

“It has to be me.” I tell him, standing my ground.

Logan’s expression morphs into one of resolute defiance. “No, I won’t let you die. I’ll do it.”

Deadpool’s voice slices through the tension, his usual levity gone, replaced by an uncharacteristic seriousness. “No can do, Peanut. It’s gotta be me.”

Logan’s confusion is immediate, his brow furrowing deeply. “What?”

Deadpool’s gaze drops, his face revealing a rare moment of vulnerability. “You didn’t ask for any of this. You were right. I lied. I lied right to your face. Just to get you to help me. You did.”

Logan’s eyes dart between Deadpool and me, filled with frantic desperation. “You didn’t lie. You made an educated wish. You got a whole world to go back to.”

His gaze settles back on me, filled with a raw, unspoken plea. “I would never let you leave me in a world without you again. I got nothing without you, so give me this.”

I shake my head slowly, tears welling up in my eyes, threatening to spill over. Logan’s movement toward the door is resolute, but the sight of his anguished expression tears at my heart. I cry harder, my sobs echoing down the narrow hallway.

Deadpool steps closer, his face lined with a rare gravity. “I waited a long time for this team-up. And you know something? You’re the best Wolverine.”

The sincerity in his voice is a stark contrast to his usual banter, and it shatters my resolve. I look at Wade, my vision blurring with tears.

Logan freezes, his body paralyzed by my powers, a look of helpless frustration etched deeply into his features. Wade stands still beside me, his eyes filled with unspoken sorrow, a silent acknowledgment of the inevitability of my choice.

“Y/N? What are you doing?”

I force myself to push down my tears, my voice trembling as I answer. “I’m doing the right thing.”

I walk past them, the effort to stop me almost tangible, their emotions reaching out like a desperate plea. I reach the door, the cold metal handle biting into my hand as I pull it open, stepping inside. The door slams shut behind me with a finality that reverberates through the hallway, their desperate shouts muffled by the thick, reinforced walls.

Logan’s roar of frustration is visceral, the impact of his body slamming into the door sending a shudder through the corridor.

“Open the door!” He screams.

“I can’t, Logan. You know it has to be me. I couldn’t save them, but I can save you.” I hold a hand up to the glass.

Logan’s voice cracks, the raw emotion evident. “Why are you fucking doing this?”

“Because I love you.” I finally admit, my heart cracking at the weight of my confession.

Logan’s response is a choked, pained cry, tears streaking down his cheeks as he pounds on the door again. His anguish is palpable, each strike against the door a testament to his heartbreak.

“You fucking idiot.”

Deadpool’s voice is strained, filled with uncharacteristic desperation. “Pumpkin? Don’t do this.”

“I love you.” I tell him again.

Logan’s voice softens, a heartbreaking admission. “I love you too.”

A sad smile tugs at my lips as I hear his final words, knowing they’re the last I’ll hear from him. “That’s all I needed to hear to know I’m doing the right thing.”

I turn away from the door, my resolve solidifying as I move toward the center of the bridge. The matter and anti-matter streams twist and writhe with chaotic energy, their raw power casting erratic shadows across the room. Cassandra stands above, the time ripper in her control, her silhouette a dark, menacing figure against the flickering lights.

I reach out, gripping the matter stream first. The metal is cold and unyielding, but as my hands close around it, blue lightning crackles up my arms. The strain is immense, and I grit my teeth as I pull the stream toward the anti-matter, the effort causing my body to shake violently. The raw power surges through me like a tempest, each pulse of energy a painful reminder of the cost of my choice.

I barely graze the anti-matter before finally getting a firm grip on it. The contact sends a jolt of searing agony through my body, and I cry out, the pain almost unbearable. The lights above flicker wildly, their erratic dance mirroring the tumultuous energy converging within me. The pounding on the door fades into a distant echo, Logan and Wade’s voices reduced to frantic, muffled pleas.

As the matter and anti-matter streams converge within me, a blinding white light envelops me, consuming everything in its intensity. My vision fades to a blur of white, the world dissolving around me, until finally—black.

Next Part

A/N: angst.

taglist: @oscarissac2099 @somiaw @100percentlazybonez @obsessedwthdilfs @sun7lowxr @corvid007

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bl-bracket · 2 years ago

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Best Kiss in a BL Bracket

Round One

Pat and Pran First Kiss (Bad Buddy) vs Kochi and Mitsuru Bed Kiss (Eternal Yesterday)

Jaewon and Jihyun Ep 9 Kiss (The Eighth Sense) vs Gavreel and Cairo First Kiss (Gameboys)

Seojoon and Jiwoo Ep 4 Kiss (To My Star 2: Our Untold Stories) vs Gao Shi De and Zhou Shu Yi Drunk Kiss (We Best Love: Fighting For Mr. 2nd)

Tinn and Gun First Kiss (My School President) vs Hira and Kiyoi Hand Kiss (Utsukushii Kare)

Vegas and Pete Hospital Kiss (Kinnporsche: The Series) vs Wan and Kitae First Kiss (Our Dating Sim)

Kan and Thua "Asleep" Kiss (The Eclipse) vs Sean and White Final Kiss (Not Me: The Series)

Siwon and Duan First Kiss (Blueming) vs Phupha and Tian Forehead Kiss (A Tale of a Thousand Stars)

Akk and Ayan Underwater Kiss (The Eclipse) vs Tin and Tol Final Kiss (Triage)

Nozue and Togawa First Kiss (Old Fashion Cupcake) vs Ai and Nhai Cheek Kiss (Ai Long Nhai)

Palm and Nueng Ep 9 Kiss (Never Let Me Go) vs Korn and Intouch Stolen Kiss (Until We Meet Again)

Pat and Pran Ep 7 Kiss (Bad Buddy) vs Ram and King Tent Kiss (My Engineer)

Kinn and Porsche First Kiss (Kinnporsche: The Series) vs King and Uea Morning Kiss (Bed Friend)

Hira and Kiyoi Final Kiss (Utsukushii Kare 2) vs Puen and Talay Forehead Kiss (Vice Versa)

Teh and Oh Aew Underwater Kiss (I Told Sunset About You) vs Gu Hai and Bai Luo Yin Drunk Kiss (Addicted)

Sound and Win First Kiss (My School President) vs Dean and Pharm First Kiss (Until We Meet Again)

Sean and White First Kiss (Not Me: The Series) vs Ye Guang and Xu Qi Zhang First Kiss (About Youth)

Kinn and Porsche Goodbye Kiss (Kinnporsche: The Series) vs Tongfah and Paper Ep 3 Kiss (Second Chance: The Series)

Nuea and Toh Ep 7 Kiss (Secret Crush on You) vs Tin and Tol Bed Kiss (Triage)

Hojoon and Jaeyoon Final Kiss (Roommates of Poongduck 304) vs Zi Xuan and Yu Hao Net Kiss (HIStory 2: Crossing the Line)

Sky and Prapai Final Kiss (Love in the Air) vs Siwon and Daun Dream Kiss (Blueming)

Vegas and Pete First Kiss (Kinnporsche: The Series) vs Palm and Nueng Beach Kiss (Never Let Me Go)

Payu and Rain Victory Kiss (Love in the Air) vs Yi and Kon Diao Sofa Kiss (Cutie Pie: The Series)

Mark and Vee Ep 3 Kiss (Love Mechanics) vs Arthit and Kongpob Ep 14 Kiss (SOTUS: The Series)

Gao Shi De and Zhou Shu Yi Bridge Kiss (We Best Love: No. 1 For You) vs Gun and Cher Ep 10 Kiss (A Boss and a Babe)

Jaeyoung and Sangwoo Ep 7 Kiss (Semantic Error) vs Bai Lang and Jin Xuan First Kiss (My Tooth Your Love)

Seojoon and Jiwoo Final Kiss (To My Star 2: Our Untold Stories) vs Pluem and Kevin First Kiss (Ghost Host Ghost House)

Milk and Uncle Final Kiss (Choco Milk Shake) vs Payu and Rain Ep 5 Kiss (Love in the Air)

Tan and Bun Couch Kiss (Manner of Death) vs Mark and Vee Shower Kiss (Love Mechanics)

Neo, Shin, and Mew Beach Kiss (3 Will Be Free) vs Sound and Win Forehead Kiss (Our Skyy 2 x My School President)

Lian and Kuea Siam Paragon Kiss (Cutie Pie) vs Win and Team Be Brave Kiss (Between Us/Until We Meet Again)

Tinn and Gun Park Kiss (My School President) vs Khai and Third First Kiss (Theory of Love)

Akk and Ayan Dream Kiss (The Eclipse) vs Seriyo and Yuzuru Bedroom Kiss (Seven Days: Friday - Sunday)

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moonmoonthecrabking · 8 months ago

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Would you happen to have any good fic recs (can be wip or completed, or some of your own) :D

hi anon!! it really depends on what you're into, though i've been posting more about hatchetfield i'll give you recs for that!! i'm going to sort this by ships, because it works in my mind so!! hope this helps!! not all the fics i like, but here are really truly just some!! especially since i couldn't find some i really liked unfortunately but, such is life. i generally like monstery themes and supernatural elements, so that's going to be a common theme in these recs, but not all of them.

jagertitty (grace x max) shameless self promotion - siren/werewolf au, incomplete, longfic @owlhari - ghost!grace and max meeting for the first time, she saves him from dying in the waylon prank, oneshot prince_doomed - another version of grace's dream of ghost!max?? the description on ao3 does it better, but either way it's very beautifully written, oneshot

lautity (grace x steph) shameless self promotion - tgwdlm au, i had fun, and it was nice to make grace instantly okay with being queer for fucking once, oneshot @vesperione (sorry for the late tag, i came across this scrolling through queer hf and realised i never fixed the post!!) - the fic is called good luck babe, what it says on the tin, gracie is repressed, oneshot @theiloveyousong - first meeting when steph and grace were little kids and adorable and you should read it, oneshot

lautski (steph x pete) @the-spaced-out-ace - pete is a mermaid, and Fun (emotional torture) is to be had, in progress but seemingly coming to a conclusion :) @max-will-one-day-be-okay - vampire steph vampire steph VAMPIRE STEPH- (in progress)

lautskity (grace x steph x pete) @max-will-one-day-be-okay - grace has a sexual fantasy about steph and pete, oneshot, :) @jklovesfandoms - generally great works for this ship, i say start with comfort her (in progress) and go from there :)

paulkins (paul x emma) slytherlynn - this fic is abandoned in the middle of very plotty stuff (so be warned it is incomplete and i doubt it will ever be complete), but it has infected!paul and i remember reading it on the train into high school YEARS ago, and i really like all the character dynamics @hotchocolateboy - very alice woodward centric, slice of life sort of stuff (my girl is going THROUGH it) but i just!! really like it!! in progress @affo-gatto-gateau - mermaid!paul fic, in progress, it's fun i'm enjoying it!! there is lore being set up and i am HERE for it

the npmd jocks (kyle x max, as well as brenda x stacy) @nibblelinephym - stacy and brenda are oblivious lesbians who are in love with each other, oneshot @tnoy-keraxis - a night (so yeah oneshot) where many people are in love and we get a peek into their lives, framed by max and kyle being useless and oblivious and tragic (they aren't useless, it's internalised homophobia)

duke x ted @amethystunarmed - duke is helping ted get custody for pete. duke is going through it. oneshot (part of a series)

i can safely recommend all of these fics, and other fics by these authors (even if they aren't listed here). happy reading!!! and ofc feel free to add recs in the reblogs!!!

#i already took up too much space but know that i'm gushing over all of these fics internally #npmd #nerdy prudes must die #hatchetfield #fic rec #jagertitty #lautity #lautski #lautskity #paulkins #queerleaders #is this about what i sent to the confessions blog like a month ago??

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absolutebl · 2 years ago

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My top 10 INTENSE mutual eye contact in Thai BL:

This is from an ask from @dramawatching (which Tumblr promptly ate).

They said, “if I’m remembering correctly I think you wrote about Akk and Ayan looking like they were soul bonding when they locked eyes in The Eclipse”

Which is true. I did.

“could you share your fave 5 BL couples with intense eye contact/staring?”

I’d be delighted (In no particular order)

The Moot Eye Fuckatude!

1. Akk & Ayan - The Eclipse

2. X & Q - 21 Day Theory (we were robbed)

3. Sea & Tin - Friend Forever (we were robbed, again)

4. Pluem & Kewin - Ghost Host, Ghost House (all round amazing chemistry with these too, like top tear. I hope we get them again in a better BL)

5. Win & Tops - Ingredients, I’m gonna say it, if you know JeffGame’s ease and connection with each other from this show you can’t NOT see how hard Jeff was struggling with his partner in KP. And yes, I do think age was a factor, but also prior established friendship.

6. The & Oh-aew - ITSAY, these tow can break your heart with just one look

7. Ae & Pete - Love By Chance, I mean COME ON

8. Ram & King - My Engineer (PerthLay were on point in Y-Destiny too), Talay is good, he has great eye intimacy with Yoon too (YYY), and Yoon had terrible eye work in Unforgotten Night so I’m assuming that it’s mostly Lay.

9. Fighter & Tutor - Why R U? (Zee, in general, does a TON of emoting with his eyes, I thought Saint was better at reciprocating than NuNew, but I have my fingers crossed for ZeeNu forthcoming fantasy piece)

10. JimmySea (whatever their characters were variably called) - Vice Versa

I had to limit myself to Thai Bl or frankly Taiwan would sweep the category.

(source)

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liltypingtom · 6 months ago

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𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓

- NAMES

Axol - Tom - Pete

- INTERESTS

Falsettos

Hazbin / HelluvaBoss

Markiplier Cinematic Universe ( ISWM, AHWM, etc )

Murder Drones

Starkid

Sanders Sides

Something Rotten

SMG4

Peter and The Starcatcher

Tin Can Bros

- ANOTHER SOCIALS

tiktok - twodoorsnotone

instagram - twodoorsnotone

twitter / x - axolthesilly

- EXTRA

draw sometimes !!!

I use any pronouns !!

art tag is tom / axol’s art

yapping tag is tom / axol yapping

edit tag is tom / pete’s edits

#intro post #introduction #tom / axol yapping #tom / axol’s art #tom / pete’s edits

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foundtherightwords · 1 year ago

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All Our Yesterdays - Chapter 11

Pairing: Ralph (Timewasters) x OFC

Summary: Thu, a museum archivist, only wants to escape her dull life in 21st-century Hanoi. The last thing she expects is to end up in 1929 Indochina via a time-traveling elevator and cross paths with Ralph, an Englishman on the run from the French Foreign Legion. Romance blossoms between them, but in a colonized country, unrest is always looming on the horizon, and Thu must decide if she wants to stay with Ralph in the past or return to the safety of the future.

Warnings: outdated/period-typical attitudes about women, mentions of war, mentions of pregnancy and abortion (involving a supporting character), some angst, some smut (non-explicit)

Chapter warnings: unwanted pregnancy, abortion, mentions of blood

Chapter word count: 3.4k

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Things between them had changed again, but now, instead of adrenaline keeping her on the edge, Thu felt like she was getting a daily boost of serotonin. She moved into the studio with Ralph to save themselves from having to sneak behind her landlady's back, and now, the simplest things, like hanging her jacket up next to Ralph's on the coat rack when she got home from work, or jostling for a place at the bathroom sink while they brushed their teeth, or grabbing one of his shirts to put on when she got out of bed in the morning, or a little casual kiss or hug or touch, could make her grin like a dork or spread a fluttery feeling from her chest all through her body.

Sometimes, when she woke up in the middle of the night, Thu wondered whether her feelings for Ralph would've been as intense, or indeed, whether she would've fallen for him at all, if they had met in less extraordinary circumstances. How could she be sure that her feelings were genuine? What if they simply came about because she had been so lost and scared and he had been there at the right time? But as she felt his arm around her waist and his breath on her hair, she told herself, No, this is real. Just because their first meeting was slightly unusual didn't make it any less real. Yes, perhaps it was fate or some mysterious cosmic force or even Homeless Pete that had thrown them together, but nothing had forced them to stay together except for their own feelings and passion for each other.

She no longer made a detour to Robin Park to check if Homeless Pete was still there. She no longer planned to go back after the Lunar New Year. Instead, she started planning for the Lunar New Year itself, eager to show Ralph all the traditions and food. That year, the Lunar New Year came early, at the end of January, and already there was an air of bustling anticipation and excitement on the streets. The pavement were crowded with vendors selling everything from flowers and plants and paintings for decoration, to green leaves and bamboo strings to wrap the square chưng cakes, without which the Lunar New Year feast was never complete, to new brass and tin wares and anything else one might need to start the year afresh.

On the Day of the Kitchen Gods, a week before the New Year, Thu followed the tradition of buying a couple of golden carps and setting them free in Sword Lake, while Ralph helped with great interest.

"But how are the carps supposed to carry the Kitchen Gods to Heaven?" he asked. "Heaven is up there, while they're swimming down here—?"

Thu smiled at his confusion. She'd asked her mom the same thing when she was little. "The myth is that the carp will swim upstream and turn into a dragon, see? It's all symbolic."

"And the Kitchen Gods are going to report our affairs to—to whom?"

"The Jade Emperor."

"Won't they be confused to learn that you're here?"

Thu stood up from the lake shore, wiping her hands on the handkerchief—her own now. "Oh man, I didn't even think about that! Would they even understand time travel? I can't imagine what my parents' Kitchen Gods must be thinking..." The thought brought back too vividly the memories of the Lunar New Year of her childhood, and her conscience smarted. She had been so happy the last three weeks that her family had not entered her mind at all. If she had gone missing in her time, there would be no Lunar New Year for them. Perhaps she could pay Homeless Pete a visit and ask him how the time machine worked exactly, whether he could take her back for a visit... And then what? Just keep going back and forth in time, like some lame version of Doctor Who? What kind of life would that be? That was if Homeless Pete could even understand her.

Noticing her smile vanish, Ralph gave her hand a squeeze. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—"

What would he say if he knew she'd found Homeless Pete? Would he urge her to go home? She looked at him, his eyes so tender, his hand so strong, and resolutely stamped down her previous thought. She'd decided to stay here with him, so there was so point in second-guessing it. She squeezed his hand back. "It's OK," she said, giving him a reassuring smile.

***

"Does this look all right?" Ralph said, placing the branch of peach blossoms in a vase on the sideboard, next to a small potted kumquat plant.

"That's perfect," Thu said. Between the peach blossoms and the kumquat, she placed a couple of chưng cakes, a dish of five fruits, their colors carefully selected to correspond to the five basic elements of metal, wood, water, fire, and earth, and other traditional foods. Then, with a certain sense of defiant glee, she pulled out a roll of scarlet firecrackers, each cracker the size of her little finger, and hung it over the balcony. Firecrackers had been banned in Vietnam a couple of years before she was born, but when she visited her grandparents in Hue as a kid, she and her cousins had often snuck a few firecrackers here and there to set off on New Year with the other children in the village. She was determined to experience this tradition properly at least once.

She stepped back to look over the display with satisfaction. It might not be as elaborate as her mom's display, and the food was all store-bought instead of homemade, but for her first Lunar New Year in the past, it would do.

Ralph wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a hug from behind as he, too, looked at the display. "So at midnight, we'll set off the firecrackers?" he asked.

"Yup, to ward off the evil spirits of the old year and bring in good luck for the new year."

"Any other traditions? Like a New Year's kiss or something?" he asked, leaning down to nuzzle into her neck.

"Haven't you been kissed enough in the past four weeks?" She twisted her head and gave him a peck anyway.

"Never!"

"Well, people sometimes take hot baths with water infused with coriander seeds, to cleanse themselves."

"Hmm, a hot bath sounds nice."

She laughed, turned around to face him, and kissed him again, more fully. Just as he was pulling her closer and the kiss became hungrier—

A knock sounded on the door.

Both groaned as they disentangled themselves from each other. The knocking started up again, urgent, persistent. Thu glanced at the clock. It was almost ten. Who on Earth could it be, at this time of night, and on New Year's Eve too?

She opened the door. Standing there, clutching a bag to her chest, her usually rosy face ashen, her hair disheveled and frosted with rain, was Mai.

"Mai, what are you doing here?" Thu asked.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know where else to go."

"How did you even know I'm here?" Great, the office's gossip mill must be rolling if they knew she and Ralph were living together. Not that she cared, but in this time and place, it was positively scandalous.

"I don't, I just—guessed," Mai said, glancing uncomfortably at Ralph.

"What's happened?"

"Can I please come in?"

With a worried look back at Ralph, Thu stepped aside to let the girl in. Mai dropped down on the couch and buried her face in her hands.

"What's the matter?" Thu asked again, sitting down next to her.

"It's—it's Louis!" Mai sobbed. "He's gone! He was transferred back to France and he said he couldn't take me with him!"

"Oh, honey." Thu put an arm around Mai's quivering shoulders. "That's not the end of the world."

"It is, it is," Mai said, weeping. "I'm pregnant!"

Thu remembered Mai's paleness, her cramps, her fatigue in recent weeks. Dismayed, she looked at Ralph, who was watching them converse in Vietnamese with mounting confusion and alarm. But she had no time to translate for him, because Mai had looked up and said, in a broken voice, "At least, I was."

The way she said it turned Thu's blood cold. "What did you do?"

"I went to this herbalist," Mai said. "He gave me this tea... I'm sorry to interrupt your New Year's Eve like this, but I had to wait until Madame Phuong and her family went back to her husband's village for the New Year... I offered to stay to mind the house... I told my parents I'll be back on the third..."

But Thu wasn't listening to her rambling explanation. "Did you drink the tea?" she interrupted.

Mai gave her a frightened look. "I did."

A jumble of terrified thoughts and terrifying memories flitted through Thu's mind. In all the contemporary novels she'd read, girls who tried to take care of their "mistakes" often died from such things. She'd never imagined that she would find herself in one of those stories.

"I don't know how long it'll take, but I'm scared to be alone," Mai continued. "Can I stay with—with you two? Just in case something happens?"

"You need to go to a hospital," Thu said.

"No!" Mai gripped her hand. "I can't! I can't let anybody else know! I only came here because"—again her eyes flicked to Ralph—"because I thought you'd understand. Please—"

Suddenly she clutched at her stomach. A small whimper escaped her lips as she bent over, curling in on herself.

Thu staggered to her feet. Ralph reached out a hand to steady her. "What's going on?" he asked.

"She's pregnant," she said shortly. "And she just drank an abortive herbal tea."

Their horrified eyes met, and Thu realized that Ralph was panicking just as she was. Neither of them knew what to do. Mai's whimper was growing louder and louder, until it became a muffled scream. She stumbled from the couch onto the floor and lay there in the fetal position, writhing, her screams clawing at every single one of Thu's nerves until she felt like screaming herself. Fumbling, she knelt down to lift Mai up. To her horror, a bloom of red was spreading on the back of Mai's áo dài, staining the floor tiles underneath. Ralph saw too, and went white as a sheet. Both of them took a step back, looking as helplessly as the bleeding girl on the floor.

"We have to get her to a hospital," he said.

Mai was still conscious, and the word "hospital" must have gotten through to her, as it sounded similar enough to the French hôpital. She shook her head and panted, in Vietnamese, through pale lips, "No, no hospital, please—"

"We're not letting you die!" Thu shouted. She turned to Ralph. "But how can we get her there? It's New Year's Eve, there's no rickshaw. Can we call an ambulance? Are there ambulances?"

Ralph chewed on his lips. Then he said, "I'll carry her. The hospital is just down the street. It's quicker. Get her bag."

His decisive voice brought some life back to Thu's numb body. She picked up Mai's bag, threw on her own jacket, and tried to help Ralph into his coat, but he shook his head, indicating that she should drape it over Mai instead. The girl was by now too weak to protest, while red continued to spread on the back of her ivory silk áo dài and drip down her legs.

They ran down the empty street. Slants of cozy yellow light peeked out behind closed doors and windows, and a smell of incense drifted out over the street, along with the soft sound of talk and laughter as families got together for the New Year. The smell and sound twisted Thu's heart as the memories of family reunions surfaced in her mind and reminded her of how alone all three of them were—neither Ralph, Mai, nor herself had any family here. They had no one except for each other.

Ralph stopped in front of a building with Hôpital indigène du Protectorat on its front. Thu recognized it as Vietnam-Germany Hospital in modern day, though it was strictly a surgical center now. How lucky that it was already here at this time!

They rushed into the emergency room. Upon seeing them, the two nurses on duty, both men, sprang into action.

"What happened?" one of them asked Thu in Vietnamese. He had a face like a shovel and looked quite put out at having to work on New Year's Eve.

"She—I think she has a miscarriage," Thu replied, unwilling to tell the truth, not knowing how these men were going to judge Mai.

The nurse turned to Ralph. "Êtes-vous son mari?"

Ralph flushed and shook his head. "Non," he replied, glancing at Thu. "Um—"

Thu could guess the source of his discomfiture easily enough. "Please, he's my—husband," she said, putting a hand on his arm. "And she's my sister. Please help her."

The two nurses glanced at each other, then one of them grabbed a stretcher. "Put her on here," he said. Ralph complied, while Thu lifted up his coat. The nurses rolled the stretcher through the door and down the corridor. Thu was all set to follow them, but then she remembered, turned, and stopped Ralph.

"I can stay," she said. "You go."

"I'm not leaving you alone—"

"I can handle it." She pressed his coat into his arms. "You don't want them to ask questions about you. Go home, Ralph. I'll be fine."

Ralph hesitated at the door, before taking her hand and dropping a quick kiss on her temple. "Let me know if—if anything happens, OK?" he said.

"OK," she said, trying to smile.

***

Thu sat in the chilly corridor, watching the swaying lamp overhead casting its dizzying shadows over the floor, while around her, nurses ran back and forth with trays of cotton wool, bandages, and other scary-looking instruments. She buttoned her jacket up to her chin, wishing she hadn't sent Ralph home, missing the warmth of his coat, the reassurance of his presence.

She'd lost all sense of time, until a faint burst of firecrackers somewhere in the street signaled it was midnight. Out with the Year of the Snake, in with the Year of the Horse. She'd missed it. But her heart was in such turmoil over Mai that she hardly cared. Deep down, she knew none of this was her fault. Louis had probably gotten Mai pregnant before Thu even met him. But somehow, she couldn't stop blaming herself. She could've told Mai to use contraceptives. She could've guessed that Mai was pregnant and found a safer way to help the girl deal with it. Heck, she could even have asked Homeless Pete to bring Mai to the 21st century and taken her to a modern hospital. What good was her modern knowledge if she couldn't use it to help these people? She leaned her head back against the wall and closed her eyes.

A while later, could be a few minutes, could be over an hour, a French doctor stepped out of the surgery behind her, accompanied by the shovel-faced nurse. Thu sprang to her feet. The doctor said something, and she turned to the nurse with a questioning look.

"Your sister is out of danger," the nurse said in Vietnamese. "Just a bit more delay and it might have been too late to save her."

Thu sank back onto the bench, her knees weak with relief. "Thank you," she said. "Merci, docteur. May I see her?" she asked the nurse.

The nurse nodded. "I'll take you to her." As he led the way down the corridor, he muttered loudly, "This is what comes of that new-fangled feminism... All these girls, running around, no parents, no husband, thinking they can do whatever they want... And the French want to modernize them? Well, the French are welcome to them!" Clearly, he meant for her to hear it. An angry retort bubbled to her lips, but she bit it back.

It being New Year's Eve, the only patient in the room was Mai. She lay on a bed in the corner of the room, hooked to a steadily dripping IV line. Her face and hands, poking out of a thin blanket, looked almost as white as the sheets, but her eyes opened upon hearing Thu approach.

Thu sat down gently on a chair next to the bed and took Mai's limp, ice-cold hand. "I'm sorry for this," she said. "But we couldn't let you die."

"No, don't apologize," Mai said, her voice hoarse. "You've saved my life. You and—"

"Ralph," Thu said, without thinking.

Mai looked confused. "I thought his first name was A-something?"

Thu cursed inwardly and fumbled for an explanation. "Yes, Alphonse. But—uh, I call him Ralph. That's, uh—his middle name."

"You love him, don't you?" A faint smile crossed Mai's face as she watched Thu blush, but the corners of her mouth barely lifted before they drooped again. "And he loves you. So lucky..."

"Forget Louis, Mai," Thu said. "You're safe now, that's the important thing. Is there anything you need?"

Mai shook her head. "I'll be all right for now. Just—please, don't let people at the office know..."

"Don't worry, I'll tell them something. Get some rest. I'll be back later, OK?"

"Thank you."

Thu sat with Mai for a little longer, until she was sure the girl had fallen asleep. She then walked back to the studio, through the street that lay wrapped in sleep, with only a few stragglers here and there, coming home from New Year's Eve celebrations, most carrying some tree branches with new buds on them as a symbol of a fresh start. Her feet dragged over the asphalt road darkening under the drizzling rain. Her grandfather always said that it was good luck to have a bit of a drizzle on the Lunar New Year. She wondered what kind of luck this rain was bringing Mai. Red remnants of firecrackers covered the ground, scattering across the pavement and pooling into dips on the road like blood. Thu sidestepped them, shivering.

She found Ralph slumped on the couch. He had mopped up the blood on the floor, but there were still some brown stains on the sleeves of his shirt, transferred from Mai when he carried her. Their New Year feast remained on the sideboard, untouched. Hearing Thu enter, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. "How is she?" he asked.

"She'll be OK. We got her there just in time."

He let out a sigh of relief. "Thank God." He went over to her, took her jacket and bag, and brushed a few strands of hair away from her pale face. "You should get some sleep. You look exhausted."

"So do you."

"Let's get cleaned up and get to bed then."

As they were snuggled up together, Thu said, her head on Ralph's shoulder, "I'm sorry your first Lunar New Year is ruined."

"Don't be silly. There'll be others."

Will there? And will I still be here?

Misunderstanding her silence, Ralph said, "You know I will never abandon you like that, don't you? If you—if you do get pregnant—"

"I won't," she said. "That's the one point the rules are very clear about. Don't impregnate or get impregnated."

"Yes, but still. If that does happen, I'll take care of you. And the baby. You have my promise, Autumn."

That wasn't what she was worrying about, but Thu smiled at him anyway. "I know." She gave him a kiss. "Go to sleep, Ralph."

As she lay her head back down, however, her smile disappeared. Despite Ralph's arms around her, she felt restless, disturbed. It wasn't just the anxiety and the exhaustion of the night, but something else. Some fundamental change had occurred. She didn't quite know what it was, but it had cracked the perfect veneer of her last few weeks with Ralph, showing the darkness hidden underneath, just as a glance behind the jolly, brightly lit teahouses and dance halls of Kham Thien had revealed its seedy alleys. She cuddled closer to Ralph and tried to sleep, while on the streets, young masters and misses, dressed to the nines, set out for their New Year parties, oblivious to the relentless, cold, gray rain.

Chapter 12

#ralph penbury #ralph timewasters #ralph x ofc #ralph penbury fic #joseph quinn #joseph quinn fic

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