#This post is about Scriabin

[sysig]

Starting with his hands because his face is pissing me off

[disposal-blueeee]

stuff i never finished and why

hello and good night . i'm just gonna ramble about stuff so yeah

swings

oh man i really loved this drawing . but it was a PAIN IN THE ASS .

i had a bunch of problems with this one . i spent an embarrassing amount of time doing the line . then after i started painting it on Ibis paint i realized that i should've done the line with a textured brush .

then the background . i really couldn't make it look nice even if i tried . i spent so long just trying stuff and searching for references but i just couldn't get it right . the colors and the lightning kept looking weird .

and just when it was looking decent , oh no the file is corrupted !!! and if i wanted it back i would have to go through a speedpaint of a drawing that took me 28 hours ( i actually tried it 😭😭 but it was taking so long and after some time the app crashed )

so , i decided to just give up . i was already fed up with it . maybe some day i'll try to redraw it or something

edit : oh wait a second . this drawing makes no sense without the background . edgar looks like that because there's supposed to be a puddle under scriabin's swing and he's trying to get edgar wet with it

otgw x chapter 20 / 21

i just said i loved the other one but THIS ONE . this one is SO PRETTY and i was so excited to try some new brushes and overall just finish this . excited enough to start painting edgar without even finishing scriabin's line .

i was using a small tablet my friend let me borrow . it was actually so helpful because i could draw on my phone with it !! i used to work on this when i was at school .

then i started having problems with the background . again

then my friend told me that his mom didn't agree with him giving me the tablet and that he should give it to his sister instead so i had to give it back . great . at that point i didn't feel like finishing it so

random reference i found in pinterest

this is like a month old maybe ???? i just thought " oh this would be such a fire pfp " and after finishing the sketch i was like " alright i'll finish this tomorrow " ( i never finished it )

mostly didn't finish it because i didn't have any idea to make it look lifeless and tragic . oh well . maybe i'll try it someday i still think it's cool

papa's cheeseria

this one isn't really unfinished . i just wanted to make a doodle sheet but never drew anything else so now he's just there . alone in a blank space . poor guy .

so yeah . everytime i play papa louie's games i always make the workers look like edgar and scriabin . i thought this default outfit looked pretty cool so so i had to draw it

[vargaslovinghours]

“Paging Dr. Vargas, you’re wanted for a disciplinary meeting on the ethics of patient/clinician relationships”

“Oh shut up”

[disposal-blueeee]

man that last shot took so long only for me to BLUR IT so hey here's the clean shot

( DON'T FIGHT IN FRONT OF THE KIDS !!!!

Todd, how are you doing? Are you happy living with Edgar and Scriabin?

[scherzokinn]

I need to talk about Julian Scriabin right now.

People know mainly of his father, Alexander Scriabin, composer of what could have been tte literally speaking world-shattering piece Mysterium, who is easily one of my favorite composers ever, understandably so as Julian mysteriously drowned in the Dniepr at only the tender age of 11.

Every once in a while I think of this little genius, and I am actually crying as I am writing this post. We were robbed from possibly some of the greatest art that could've been, and only we have left of him are four preludes. Preludes with likely the most sophisticated feelings ever expressed in music by a child.

Think of the darkest music you can, and know that the beginning of his first prelude, written when he was 10, undoubtedly and by far contemplates more despair. Despair followed by ferocity, hope, which were never to be.

Please appreciate the eeriness, the anxiety, the tenebrosity, the virtuosity of these juvenile yet venerably mature pieces of art.

He deserves to be known.

❤️‍🩹

[scyphosunny]

vargastober day 11 was posted a couple days ago ! this is a huge one , so let's talk about it .

i wanted to write an entry for this one yesterday , but i wasn't home ! i was still able to write something , but i spent most of the day getting some sleep . SUNNY , SLEEPING MORE THAN 3 HOURS A DAY ? NEVER HEARD OF IT !

first of all . . . what happened with day 10's piece ? if im being honest , i can't really remember anymore . but i'll try .

ah , yes ! it was a busy day , overall . ( it really wasn't .

i spent some time with else on vc , had a nice time ! talked about a bunch of stuff . then , i tried to get something before 7PM . . . and while i did get a small sketch i wasn't really pleased with it . which is weird ! because i drew something similar a while ago . . .

THE COMPARISON IS FUCKING KILLING ME , WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE HE SWALLOWED A FUCKING BRICK IN THE FIRST ONE . i had a lot of trouble with face shapes , as you can probably notice . . .

did my usual things , watched evo with sister and had something to eat . then , it was thursday ! and usually my friends and i do stuff on thursdays . that day we played stardew valley !

my sister ended up puking and i panicked because i have emetophobia so after crying for an hour i was exhausted

i was planning on going to sleep early today since i was so tired . i tried to push myself a bit to get that piece done but i knew for a fact that i wouldn't be able to stay awake or focus even if i wanted . i also knew that if i tried maybe i could get something i liked ? sometimes the sketches for these don't look great , it's mostly about the colors or the ambience i add afterwards . ough then my friend asked if i could wake her up at 3AM because they all know im usually awake at that hour , and my stupid ass said yes even if i was falling asleep on the couch . i took a nap and i was talking to cris to try and keep myself awake . then i just went to sleep . and yeah , i knew the piece for yarn would be huge so i didn't even try to continue with the past one . another one to my " failed " folder ! this is the second time i chose a reference from the same artist and this is the second time i fail . MAYBE THAT'S BEEN THE PROBLEM THIS WHOLE TIME

i was setting ideas for the prompts , and the idea i had for this one was actually very different ! i was thinking , maybe scriabin using edgar like a puppet with strings of yarn ! that was a cool concept . maybe too cool . so i was like . . . what if someone already has this idea ?? what if we end up doing the same things ? something i want to avoid . i feel like , that's an image that also appears in other people's heads . so i was thinking . . . what else could i do . . . . . . and don't even know how , but i got the idea of that one scene scri described on chapter 20 !

this one ! it had been a scene i wanted to draw for a long time . honestly , i want to draw all the memories they described ough I JUST LOVE DRAWING FOR THIS UNIVERSE SO MUCH . it feeds my age regression delusions .

as soon as i was up , i tried not to waste too much time so i could work with this one . i really wanted to get it done that day ! since i knew i'd be out on saturday .

let's see . . . when i told brusk about this one i talked about how i had NO IDEA how i was going to achieve this and she shared this cool website with a bunch of 3D models of pretty rooms ! so i searched for one that looked similar to what i had in mind for their room .

started thinking . . . what do i think their room looks like ? at first i was thinking of it a bit like bluey's room , maybe . . . or dipper and mabel's room too . just two beds in the corners of the room . a bunk bed would also work for them , but let's just leave it like that .

this is a bit of what i had in mind ! maybe edgar's bed being the one on the lefft and scri's the one on the right . i tried to make it look messier for that reason lolz . two windows , some toys on the floor , a nice carpet in between the beds . . . i can't really imagine them having posters around , to be honest . maybe just some pictures . . . even if i added two beds ( for obvious reasons ) i have the hc that scri would mostly sleep on edgar's bed . a bit like what he does on the chapters after he has a body ! scri just goes , sits on the corner of the bed and even if edgar told him not to sleep there he still does and edgar doesn't do anything about it lolz . i can imagine scri walking to edgar's bed in the middle of the night to cuddle with edgar and that's that . so , in theory , edgar's bed should be the messy one and scri's would be made most of the time since he doesn't really sleep there . " his bed would be made " , is that how you even call it ? i don't know . . . then , they'd have fights and would sleep separately . ough , my little kids . </3

so yeah , that was the layout i had planned originally . i searched on the website , and these caught my eye !

( links for them are here and here

i was going to use that ffirst one as the reference but then i was like . that's a bad place to put a bed . ( ??? ) so i kept looking , even if i wanted to give those vibes . then , found that second one and my brain immediately went PERFECT

BUT .

i have a little problem . and my perception of time is absolutely broken . I CAN'T VISUALIZE HOW THINGS WERE BEFORE 2000'S i SWEAR . 2000's for me are like . how everything is rn . maybe like those nostalgia pics ppl like to share on social media . but , for everything before the 2000's it's like

WHICH IS A FUCKING PROBLEM BECAUSE I CAN'T VISUALIZE ANYTHING FOR THEM THAT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE IT BELONGS TO YEAR 1800

i knew for a fact that the story was set in the 90's but i also wasn't sure ? because there's this entry on violation where scriabin writes a date .

I WAS PRETTY CONFUSED , i wanted to go with that but i also knew that we couldn't really trust scri when it comes to anything . i asked zar because i wanted to have everything in place and she did say that scri was lying lolz . I JUST THINK OF THAT A LOT everytime i want them to do something i'm constantly thinking " did this thing exist back then " " is this how this thing looked when this happened " IT'S ANNOYING

i had to do some calculations . . . let's see , if the story is set roughly on the 90's , and edgar's like , 30 years old let's say ( i hc him being +30 , but zar usually says that he's in his late twenties so i'd go with 27 or 28 ) , so he was a kid on . 1970 , let's say . i literally googled " rooms in the 70's " but i was still leaning into something that looked more old that that . THEY ALSO SEEM TO LIVE IN THE FOREST OR SOMETHING IDK their house looks old in my head

i did end up changing the bed's design , though . make it a little more square-ish . if that makes sense . oh , also ! i added some stairs for scri , since he's so small and the bed looks tall ( it was actually even taller in the 3D render ) . he maybe moved the stairs to edgar's bed so he could just hop in when he wanted . smol boy .

so well . . . i had no idea if i could trust the process , to be honest . i had to move some stuff around , pushed the bed to the corner of the room , added the window in between the beds and uh idk i think that's all i had to move

so , i went from this

to this

to , well . this !

before even starting i watched a tutorial . i know for a fact that i'm not good at backgrounds . and i really REALLY didn't want to fuck this one up because if i got it right it would be SO GREAT . this is the tutorial i watched , by the way . . . it was super useful !

i started working on it at 1pm maybe , and as you can see by the hour on the screenshots ( i just checked and i took the screenshots at night lolz ah well ) it took me the whole day . ougghh . once i got to take a break and eat something , it was time to color stuff . i had fun choosing colors and textures for everything . . . really like that one wallpaper i chose ! and green always looks pretty on everything . also , added that one texture i always use for the skin and i really like how it makes everything look . looks less flat .

i didn't know what i wanted to do with those pictures . i just added one of edgar and his grandma maybe and a random rose . i wanted to make it a butterfly and looking back at it i should've gone with the butterfly but i couldn't get it to look right , bleh .

also , those strings holding the frame weren't supposed to be red but i accidentally drew them in the same layer as the yarn , so when i colored everything the strings also got colored and was too lazy to get them back to normal lolz .

coloring little scri was really fun ! i was planning to draw edgar crawling on the floor originally , as scri described . but i couldn't find a reference i liked and also , it was about time to draw scri in one of these ! it's been a while since he showed up . i just keep drawing edgar but i do find funny that everytime i tried to draw scri on these recently i just fail . DID I GET USED TO DRAW EDGAR AND NOW I CAN'T DRAW SCRI ANYMORE ??????? IDK but that can't be good .

uh , what else . . . coloring everything was a long process but picking colors was still fun . scri's sweater was actually blue at first but i didn't like how it looked so i changed it . . .

getting the yarn in place was actually harder than i expected . I DIDN'T REALLY ADD A BUNCH OF STUFF TO LOOP IT WITH , i wanted to make their room look messier at first but i got lazy . maybe add some clothes on the floor or shoes , i don't knnnnow . . . I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO ADD MORE DETAILS I'M SICK OF THIS DRAWING

i tried to make it just a whole thread of yarn going everywhere but at the end i did add some random pieces because it looked empty , bleh . even know , i feel like the yarn is not noticeable enough and that bugs me off because YARN IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE MAIN THING ON THE PIECE and you can't even see it .

( quick break to say that i'm listening to dusty dirty curse by kikuo and i keep feeling sad because i didn't know the song before going to the concert a month ago , I REMEMBER ENJOYING IT AND STUFF BUT I LISTENED TO IT LIVE AND DIDN'T KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THAT WOULD BE FOR ME IN THE FUTURE . god i only knew its name because zarla told me but god GGGODDD PLEASE TAKE ME BACKKKK PLEASE I CAN ENJOY IT MORE THAN BEFORE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I WAS SO HAPPY BACK THEN

my art is already HARD TO SEE I'D SAY but bleh

i was almost done coloring stuff . . . and sometimes for some reason my csp lags a bit when i try to change to certain brushes . well , i tried to change brushes , my csp freezes , the screen gets black for a second and i'm thinking " please don't crash , please don't crash " then i got a blue screen

fun ! ( fun fact , blue screens used to scare me so much . everything related with technology errors still scares me but last pc i had would crash over and over and over again so i kinda just got used to it lolz . now this one doesn't crash as much . last time it did was because i tried to play minecraft with shaders and it really didn't like that . oh well , where was i . .

i couldn't remember last time i saved and honestly it SCARED ME because i couldn't afford to lose progress back then . it was probably past 11PM at this point . . . i did get why my pc crashed , though . . . i had it turned on since 1PM . i did take breaks and stuff but i didn't turn it off completely ? so it was probably tired . at that point my time with csp opened was more than 11 hours . well . . .

i turn it on again . . . i check the file . . . didn't lose a lot ! i just colored the lamp on the drawer and the calendar lolz . i checked my file though , and i realized that csp actually restored some of the progress for me ! i didn't know it could do that . . . when it comes to the app crashing , i knew i could always trust sai2 . everytime the app crashed , i would open it again and it immediately would be like " hey you didn't save do you want your file back ooorrr . . . . . . . " and i never got that on csp until that ! really appreciated .

didn't know what to do for that calendar , exactly . so i just added that day's date . october 11th !

what else . . . had fun with the lightning and the colors . it was mostly me experimenting . i didn't know that to make for edgar's blanket . . . and well i just love the combination between blue and yellow . so why not throw some stars .

also , that bit of green is supossed to be scri's bed . added some random drawings to the paper sheets on the floor . . .

i searched for a while to find a nice texture to add to the floor . . . most of the ones i found weren't free . and when i finally found one i liked it took foverer to download . i was like PLEASE I JUST NEED TO DO THIS ONE THING

and i think that was all ! i'm really proud of this piece . it's my best piece currently . took around 13 hours with breaks . . . started at 1PM and finished it at 3AM maybe ? took two breaks to eat and shower. i'm used to take this long on pieces but god . it also has like , 300 layers . maybe 200 , i don't know . . . and makes me so much happier knowing that it ( mostly ( came out of my brain and not from a random pinterest reference !

i wish i had a speedpaint and i've been wanting to record speedpaints for these but I ALWAYS FORGET TO PRESS RECORD UGH

with and without filter ! i really , REALLY love this filter . it kinda gives 2016 tumblr vibes . or one of those filters on instagram no one actually uses . Río de Janeiro

as you can see , there's some stuff i cropped out . mostly because it didn't look good . . . those books on the shelf look kinda odd and the window is also throwing me off .

quick comparison ! last time i made a background this complicated was back in 2021 . . . even if it's been a long time since i really tried with one of these it's still way better . i've grown so much as an artist X3

i don't know if i'll work on today's piece , if i'm being honest . . . i think i'll try but i was out all day today and woke up at six . tired . . . was falling asleep in the bus back home until bug by kairiki bear started playing . my eyes just snapped wide open lolz . i really don't want to skip another prompt , ugh . i do enjoy drawing edgar bleeding to death , so that might encourage me just enough lolz . i was also out on saturday , as i already mentioned . didn't do a whole lot . . . i did write a small jake / edgar drabble i know for a fact i WON'T POST because i'm not good with writing !

pics i took today ! aren't i pretty ? also , i told you my shoes were cool !!!!!!!!!!!!

i'll have something to eat for dinner . . . then i'll see what i can do X3

also lol i've been having trouble to TURN MY MONITOR ON and i'm afraid that one of these days i'll try to work on a piece and it won't turn on . ugghh

[elipheleh]

Music - Henry's Music Room, with special guest Bea

The only room that really feels like both Henry and Bea is a small parlor on the second floor converted into a music studio. The colors are richest here: hand-woven Turkish rugs in deep reds and violets, a tobacco-colored settee. Little poufs and tables of knickknacks spring up like mushrooms, and the walls are lined with Stratocasters and Flying Vs, violins, an assortment of harps, one stout cello propped up in the corner. -Chapter 8, Red White & Royal Blue

This post features youtube links, rather than the spotify links of the other posts, simply due to the nature of the music involved. As such, I've put the whole post under a read more to save space. I want to thank @zukoinmypocket for all her help and willingness to be a sounding board for a stranger!

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Link to the masterpost/contents page for the music posts

Link to the masterpost/contents for the whole series

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In the center of the room is the grand piano, and Henry sits down at it and plucks away idly, toying with the melody of something that sounds like an old song by The Killers.

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Henry's classical music influences appear to be all - aside from the Killers! - within the Romantic era of music. The Romantic period in Europe was at its peak from 1800-1850, but dates throughout the 1800s. The former era was known as the Classical period and is commonly associated with the composers Haydn, Mozart, Beethoven, and Schubert.

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So he just listens and nods and smiles a little while Henry explains that this is what Brahms sounds like,--

Husband and wife duo, Lang Lang and Gina Alice Redlinger, play Brahms' Hungarian Dance No. 5.

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--and this is Wagner, and how they were on the two opposing sides of the Romantic movement. “Do you hear the difference there?”

R Wagner-C. Marín: Concert Paraphrase of "The Ride of Valkyries". Carles Marín, piano.

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His hands are fast, almost effortless, even as he goes off into a tangent about the War of the Romantics--

The War of the Romantics is a term used to describe the schism that emerged in Germany between two groups of Romantic composers, in the latter 1800s. The split - 'war' - was between those who defended the classical tradition - the absolute group which included people like Brahms - and those who were progressive - the program music group with Liszt and Wagner, among others.

Program music was descriptive, inspired by things like literature, or other non-musical inspiration, whilst absolute music's meaning was solely the notes on the page - inspired by nothing outside the music itself.

Liszt's piece linked below is a good example of program music, being connected to the poem "O lieb, so lang du lieben kannst!", as is Scriabin's piece Henry references.

Both forms added to classical music, program music - like Wagner - created new genres within the form, and absolute music - like Brahms - made old styles of music align with contemporary styles.

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--and how Liszt’s daughter left her husband for Wagner, quel scandale.

Liszt's daughter - Cosmina - actually had three children with Wagner whilst still married to her first husband.

Liszt's Liebestraum No. 3 - this piece is based a lovely poem, "O lieb, so lang du lieben kannst!" ("Oh dear, as long as you can love!")

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He switches to an Alexander Scriabin sonata, winking over at Alex at the composer’s first name. The andante—the third movement—is his favorite, he explains, because he read once that it was written to evoke the image of a castle in ruins, which he found darkly funny at the time. He goes quiet, focused, lost in the piece for long minutes.

Alexander Scriabin's Sonata no. 3, Andante

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There's something very interesting - and very in keeping with Henry's characterisation - that he was written as being interested most by Romantic era music. Not only are many Romantic pieces tied to literature and art - and we see Henry's love for both displayed in the book - but the Romantic period involved the rebellion against traditionalist expectations, and emphasised passion over reason. We can see this tying into Henry's storyline - he is, by his reluctance to willingly closet himself for the 'image' of the monarchy, rebelling against the traditionalist norms and expectations that surround his life as a prince of England. It's his passion, his love for Alex which leads him to stand up to his grandmother - the Queen, analgous to the Classical era's traditionalism - and refuse to back down over his desire not to lie about the emails and photographs which outed him.

The Romantic era, in many ways, worked to break the rigid standards that previous composers had been aligned with in the Classical Era and before. This makes an interesting analogy with Henry's interest in Romantic music - especially with the reference to Scriabin's imagery of a castle in ruins. Throughout Red White & Royal Blue, Henry is looking for ways to subvert the rigid expectations that come with being a prince. Multiple times in the book, Henry chooses to do the opposite of what he 'should' do, often when he is frustrated with his family. For example, in Chapter 8, after Phillip has been questioning Henry about his actions & suggests Henry should try to align his friendships more with those 'fitting' for a member of the royal family, Henry says to Alex: "I want to do the absolute last thing I'm supposed to be doing right now."

Henry's characterisation fits in with his appreciation for Romantic era music, in ways that aren't apparent at first glance. Henry & Alex's (happy) ending - breaking the rigid standards the Queen attempts to enforce on Henry as well as challenging the traditionalist expectations - parallels both common themes in Romantic music and the evolution of how the composers rejected traditional styles and created their own.

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“You know, Bea has only ever wanted to play music,” he starts. “Mum and Dad played too much Joni Mitchell for her growing up, I think. -Chapter 7

Sources/Additional Reading: Wikipedia - War of the Romantics ClassicFM - The War of the Romantics BBC iWonder - Dr. Caroline Rae discusses the ‘War of the Romantics’ Art And Popular Culture - War of the Romantics ClassicFM - What was the War of the Romantics? Russell Ger Composer - War of the Romantics Wikipedia - Romanticism Encyclopedia.com - The Challenge of Romanticism: Literature and Music Willan Academy - A Quick Summary of Romantic Music OpenALG - Music & The Human Experience, Chapter 11 Connolly Music - The Romantic Period of Music

[autisticempathydaemon]

henlo omg i’m so excited i love matchups!! okay the song(s) i’m fixated on at the moment are scriabin’s poeme op 32 no 1 (you should give it a listen if you like piano music!! it’s so good!!) and ichiko aoba’s asleep among endives. my enneagram type is 5w4! im definitely an introvert… my mbti changes around sometimes but i think im infj? my favourite animal is a swan… my favourite things to do are listen to music and walk around outside, preferably at the same time!! im hoping to do a degree in piano performance! im autistic and piano is my special interest! i also really like singing in choirs! i had a marine biology phase when i was younger and it’s my dream to go sea swimming and find a whale or something. my favourite movie ever is whisper of the heart, and my favourite things to read are usually composer biographies or greek myths. i don’t play many video games, but i LOVE breath of the wild and skyrim. my favourite smells are white flowers and vanilla, and i love fluffy and silky and fudgey textures. sorry if this was too much or too vague! thank you so so much for doing this, i love your account and i’m so excited to see who you will pick!! have a nice day <3

Your whole vibe is very sweet and cute and calming, and Anton strikes me as the sort of guy could really benefit from and adore a partner like you.

Your favorite video games work really well, because Anton seems like he would play more technical, puzzle-solving games- Portal, Terraria, and the like. It’d be really cute for the two of you to play Stardew Valley, which is cute and atmospheric and has an open-world concept like you seem to like but also has a goal and method to it that he would excel at.

Barring playing together, I could imagine him coming home from a long day at work (before ETS snatched him up, the dickheads) and y’all parallel-playing your respective games on your switches. I also think he loves to listen to you play or practice or info-dump about piano; I think he would be really soothed and delighted by that.

Song:

I used to hear a simple song/ That was until you came along/ Now in it's place is something new/ I hear it when I look at you

It’s a sappy choice, but it’s just a great song. The album cover and your special interest being piano make it just work so well. It really brings to mind an adorable ficlet of Anton watching you play and reflecting on the way you and your love have enriched his life.

Runner-ups:

Type Five’s are characterized as curious, thoughtful, introverts- you have a serenity to you that Camelopardalis would love and literally thrive off of. Now, as for the third, hear me out… Kody, if he weren’t a total, absolute dickbag, would sing so wonderfully alongside your piano. We were robbed of a cute, kissable water elemental goshdammit.

Note: I can’t wait to listen to the piano song you’re hyperfixated on, thank you for the recommendation 🧡

Want a match-up of your own? Read this post, and tell me about yourself! 💌

[vexture]

For the fic writer ask game: 💘💥💎💌

💘Is there any posted fic you want to rework/re-edit/re-write

Outside of almost all of my JtHM works, there is the singular fic I made for the AHS fandom that I posted, that I know now (as a more seasoned writer) has a lot of issues, and even though I posted it when I was 14 or something, I still wince at my past self a little, I was in a really bad place. I still love AHS, I'm just not tuned in enough to the lore and shit to actually rewrite it without making a mess of myself. Eventually though!

💥Find your least kudos'd fic - say something wonderful about it

I have quite a few under 5 kudos that span some years, but the one with only a single kudos (no accompanying bookmarks or comments) is for the Azure series I dropped after I realized oc/canon content really isn't liked in the JtHM fandom (unless it's Scriabin) so it only got two works, and one person liked both (thank you vampriejunkie).

I really liked the concept that Edgar has a guardian angel, that follows him through each death he has. It was supposed to be this whole thing where the angel, Azure, partners with him and he gets a happy ending and actually lives past 21-25. There are so many ideas I still have for the both of them, and I drew vv rad art of Azure a few times. But I won't be doing anything for JtHM unless specifically requested anymore, so I don't think Azure will be picked up again.

💎Why is writing important to you?

It's gotten me through years of emotional neglect and abuse, and it shows (most of which was posted to Wattpad, yes, I'm serious.) If you take a look at how I used to do things in fic (if you can find it) you can see almost exactly what I read in fandom, what I took from it, and how long I had that mentality for. I used to think a whole host of things were okay as long as it was happening to me (which resulted in many friends distancing and leaving, in turn unintentionally worsening the behaviour) because I was groomed by family and family friends into believing it was okay (I used to be heavily into Supernatural, take a wild guess on what I thought was okay without any consideration that it was my situation at the time that influenced my response to people telling me no, it wasn't.) and that shaped how I wrote.

It was my only outlet because being on US disability benefits ™ in one of the lowest ranking states when it comes to mental health is the worst. After years of therapists and social workers that were only with me for a few months at a time kept leaving, I turned to writing. I'm finally in a spot (while still not ideal) where I can actually engage with art and writing in a more balanced way, because learning how to not digitally self harm was extremely difficult to do by myself, but I did it, even if there are slip ups sometimes (which is normal, just like any negative coping mechanism/addiction recovery) and I still write very angsty things, but at least I know what I'm doing with the themes I want to present now, and I'll learn with the ones I don't.

💌Share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

Friend Carmen has read over a current Monster fic involving Wolfgang, that I'm not done with, but I'm extremely excited to see where it goes! I also have one in the works with Steiner and Dieter, that I'm almost done with, and should be posted eventually. I miss writing for Monster, but the little meow meows of the Revachol Citizens Militia have me by the neck rn, so those will be a while yet. I have so many Monster wips actually, maybe I'll pick one up and dust it off in the meantime to throw seeds at my friends (affectionate).

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary425

11/22-23/24

friday-saturday

beep beep beep,

i forgot, last night, to write about the movies i watched, i was so tired.

the first was another carl theodor dreyer film, michael. i found it good, obviously not as special as what he would go on to do in passion of joan of arc, however you see flashes of that in his closeups of people though none of the montage work really appears, it's fine though, it's interesting to see dreyer progress in from michael to passion, and michael is also a rather special film in its own right (as is man of the house), it's a gentle sort of tragedy, it's not so painful as others, actually as i think of it now, the master painter carl zeit, who loves michael, creates a final masterpiece, an old man on some rocks, i believe it is another painting but i don't know which, and it's this image of total loss, feeling abandoned by the world, and still, expressing himself in such a way, he continuously gives and gives to his beloved, who is instead in love with this woman. michael at one point is asked by carl to paint her eyes as he can't do it right, he holds no love for her, what comes from his brush is a lifeless thing, and when michael does it, we actually do see a brief spot of montage, so forgive me i was mistaken, rapidly cut together shots of her face and eyes, brief but shocking and beautiful, it conveys that sense of affection as well as the transformation the beloved takes on as you gaze upon them, or as they move, the way they transform your insides, your responses to them. anyhow, he falls in love with her, she is a destitute russian countess, he wastes carl's funds, sells off a painting carl must buy back and give back to michael, a huge portrait of michael titled "the victor" where he stands nude and tall, a giant painting, all of this, carl does not curse michael for, he only gives, always giving to him, even as he travels towards death, lonely, his sketches of algiers absconded with by michael quietly, he claims, i forget...i gave them to him as a gift, yes, a gift. and michael is struck with grief but with his love at his side, they seem genuinely in love, in the film (i cannot say for the book this story is adapted from), she isn't really some sort of wicked woman getting this man to manipulate another, she is in need, michael desperately wants to help her, this is all he has. parallel to this, there is a man who keeps his wife miserable and with her secret lover, friend to her husband, upon the husband's finding out, he kills the secret lover/his friend in a duel, rather interesting to see their loveless relationship which only brings grief to that woman, and the unrequited love of carl for michael, where he lets carl go, a true love left to travel where it pleases. it's a beautiful thing, ultimately.

another strange thing about this, is i watched it on youtube, and they had chosen some chopin best of i think, to play, overlaid with a vinyl crackling that was really painful for me to listen to honestly, so i switched the sound off and at first played the film with some satie behind it, and the 3 gymnopedies worked great behind it, though i think those are such great pieces of music they will work with anything. eventually though, after i made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (i eat like a child sometimes...), i switched to recordings of scriabin by vladimir sofronitsky, and by the end of the film, this was playing:

which made it, maybe more than it earns with its images alone (truly i am unsure, this is not a condemnation of the images or to say they may not be worth what i felt, but with the music tethered, it is impossible to part them), really powerful. of course it would be, this is i think one of the greatest recordings of music i've heard, it's really incredible. it all felt perfect, it matched the images or i made the images match it perfectly.

after that, a rather strange thing happened, the film ended, i looked at discord, an acquaintance posted (i think) a compilation of roland kayn's work, and that was uploaded by the account of my dead friend dom, so with these odd and heavy feelings of watching this kind man give to others (or one others but the gesture took on this feeling of broadness, a general kindness behind an icy demeanor), i was reminded of the gentle kindness of my friend dom, and so overwhelmed i began crying, and listened to absent friend by bark psychosis, and then i started talking about him, which always feels odd, it's a cruelty people with dead people in their lives are afforded i suppose, to stick that cross in the ground wherever the hills rise and time conspires to make these gone people appear in our memories. i felt bad, to do it, shortly after doing it, but she was very nice, she seemed sorry or, not sorry, it's just what else do you say to people sad about things like that, she was very kind, or is.

here are a couple screenshots:

i rather like the one where we see them looking at the nude statue over their shoulders, he looks at her, she at him, the thing in the middle, it says so much, it's arranged in a really surreal way too i feel.

the next film was beloved enemy by alan clarke, which was great as always, dull though, a powerful dull, i guess more a throb than a dull thing, the film throbs along as slimy business men talk to soviet emissaries about selling tires and lasers, the fall of the soviet way of living, austerity, the collapse of socialist dreams, the kiln that reality was tempered in i suppose, on display. given that, it isn't so emotional, in fact, every character being a repugnant worm really, you're just left with the fact that the world really is moved by such calculated means. it's an ugly film, and it's maybe clarke's weakest i've seen, still great though.

after that was another film which i would describe as throbbing and procedural as well, and also full of repugnance, but the characters so silent, outside of delivering and receiving orders, lapses in the ability to remain at any kind of remove, and so on, it's not so ugly, in fact it's shot beautifully and strangely, this was alan clarke's contact. a really great film about british military men disturbing north ireland, getting shot at sometimes, killing poor people who are poorly equipped, aimlessly wandering in the dark and day, in lovely green hills, all led by an unnamed man played by sean chapman who is a really unsung talent in clarke's work and this film really shows how incredible an actor he is, that it's mostly in the body, in fact, the flatness of his voice when he speaks, the quietness of it until it can't be quiet any longer (when he must shout at the boys (yes, they all seem like boys, so young the other men in his... i dunno what they call it, is it a platoon? the little army cluster they operate in)), i say gentle quite a bit i guess, but his voice is gentle and scarcely emotes, it feels restrained, with so much intent, nothing leaks through, only in his eyes staring blankly, that he's so spaced out he sees through earth and into outerspace, empty of thought, only possessed by void, after one of his men dies to a landmine, and all he says of it is, get back to cover, what the fuck are you doing, when the others run and express fear and then talking to another captain or something, no morbid talk, keep them occupied, and back at their weird prison-base thing, he died, part of the job, what you sign up for, after this, it seems like he really would like to die. i keep thinking of the final little bit of the film, a long feeling sequence because of how tense it is (the film is so tense generally, it feels painful, really like too much always), where he seems to be praying he's come across a carbomb, he opens both doors, so slowly, painfully slow, and then turns the car on, nothing happens, he begins kicking the car, he emotes, it's only this pained howl, that's how it is in my head, i think he's saying fuck. then they move on, the platoon (i suppose), and then one of the other boys is blown up by a landmine.

it's not really interested in you caring deeply for these men, they're this strange and aimless limb of state violence, instead it's this strange thing, their bodies, they're so totally possessed, so totally used, there's some other portion of their life, all that this can be expressed in is silence, inaction, tiredness, and death, wanting to die, that's where their grasp of life has been pushed out to, this is the tragic feeling, not that they're really good people put in bad circumstance, just that by the functioning of the state and disciplinary apparatuses, they hardly are anymore, they are bodies of the state's will, their feeling of what the fuck are we doing here, why these people, it's only at the backs of their heads. the end of the film is the captain staring into space, his hands over his face, reduced to all he had any grasp on, a fearful animal.

it's hard to express how much it continues to make me feel, seeing him try to die like that, seeing anyone try to die via military procedure, it's so odd, it feels ahead of every other film like this, because it doesn't give you much character, it gives you these hints, nothing to love, just hints of these people craving violence because it means something other than more green, more walking, more sleeping in a ditch, and thus that cruelty is harnessed by the state to make them better at killing, better at capturing, less kind to whoever they come across, a machine which produces startling images to make people fall into line as much as a group of mercenaries sent to kill random people who went from being farmers to men who pick up guns to defend themselves.

anyhow, i must shower now. today, i woke up late-ish, 11:30, am very hungry, i have drawn a little, i wonder though if i've chosen bad colors for shadows maybe. maybe i should ask my girlfriend, she knows this kind of thing well, as she is an artist. she gave me the advice, somewhat recently, basic color theory tip is cold light, warm shadows, warm light, cold shadows. i think, right? anyhow, i am trying to keep to that, i just worry i leave things too translucent, too low of an opacity as i build things out and i get something that looks more like dirt than shadow.

well, i've been sort of up to that all day, i also cooked, did some cleaning up too, i like cleaned some disgusting black matter from the drain in the bathroom sink, i've now done my nightly work out (as opposed to the daily workout done briefly after waking up (ideally at least (sometimes, it takes some time to get there (i always do, however (not to brag))))), and i've also done some reading.

the reading today has been the first chapter of flannery o'connor's the violent bear it away.

here are some quotes i rather liked:

"(...) while he thrashed out his peace with the lord, and when he returned, bedraggled, and hungry, he would look the way the boy thought a prophet ought to look. he would look as if he had been wrestling a wildcat, as if his head were still full of the visions he had seen in his eyes, wheels of light and strange beasts with giant wings of fire and four heads turned to the four points of the universe. these were the times that tarwater knew that when he was called, he would say, "here i am lord, ready!" at other times when there was no fire in his uncle's eye and he spoke only of the sweat and stink of the cr"oss, of being born again to die, and of spending eternity eating the bread of life, the boy would let his mind wander off to other subjects."

"he was a bull-like old man with a short head set directly into his shoulders and silver protruding eyes that looked like two fish straining to get out of a net of red threads."

"don't wait," old tarwater had said. "listen. if it ain't feasible to use the box when the time comes, if you can't lift it or whatever, just get me in the hole but i want it deep. i want it ten foot, not just eight, ten. you can roll me to it if nothing else. i'll roll. get two boards and set them down the steps and start me rolling and dig where i stop and don't let me roll over into it until it's deep enough. prop me with some bricks so i won't roll into it and don't let the dogs nudge me over the edge before it's finished. you better pen up the dogs."

"the dead don't bother with particulars" the boy interrupted. the old man grabbed the front of his overalls and pulled him up against the side of the box and glared into his pale face. "the world was made for the dead. think of all the dead there are," he said, and then as if he had conceived the answer for all the insolence in the world, he said, "there's a million times more dead than living and the dead are dead a million times longer than the living are alive," and he released him with a laugh."

"a slow warm rising resentment that this freedom had to be connected with jesus and that jesus had to be the lord."

"in the darkest most private part of his soul, hanging upsidedown like a sleeping bat, was the certain, undeniable knowledge that he was not hungry for the bread of life. had the bush flamed for moses, the sun stood still for joshua, the lions turned aside before daniel only to prophesy the bread of life? he felt a terrible disappointment in that conclusion, a dread that it was true. the old man had said that as soon as he died, he would hasten to the banks of the lake of galilee to eat the loaves and fishes the lord had multiplied. "forever?" the horrified boy asked "forever," the old man said." "the boy sensed that this was the heart of his great uncle's madness, this hunger, and what he was secretly afraid of was that it might be passed down, might be hidden in the blood and might strike some day in him and then he would be torn by hunger like the old man, the bottom split out of his stomach so that nothing would heal or fill it but the bread of life. he tried when possible to pass over these thoughts, to keep his vision located on an even level, to see no more than what was in front of his face and to let his eyes stop at the surface of that. it was as if he were afraid that if he let his eye rest for an instant longer than was neeeded to place something -- a spade, a hoe, the mule's hind quarters before his plow, the red furrow under him -- that the thing would suddenly stand before hi, strange and terrifying, demanding that he name it and name it justly and be judged for the name he gave it. he did all he could to avoid this threatened intimacy of creation. when the lord's call came, he wished it to be a voice from out of a clear and empty sky, the trumpet of the lord god almighty, untouched by any fleshly hand or breath. he expected to see wheels of fire in the eyes of unearthly beasts. he had expected this to happen as soon as his great-uncle died. he turned his mind off this quickly and went to get a shovel."

"the boy's heart was beating so fast he was afraid it was going to gallop out of his chest and disappear forever."

"he'll never be baptized--just as a matter of principle, nothing else. as a gesture of human dignity, he will never be baptized."

"well now, the stranger said, don't you think any cross you set up in the year 1952 would be rotted out by the year the day of judgement comes in? rotted to as much dust as his ashes if you reduced him to ashes? and lemme ask you this: what's god going to do with sailors drowned at sea that the fish have et and the fish that et them et by other fish and they et by yet others? and what about people that get burned up naturally in house fires? burnt up one way or another or lost in machines until they're pulp? and all those sojers blasted to nothing? what about all those that there's nothing left of to burn or bury?"

"a burning arm slid down tarwater's throat as if the devil were already reaching inside him to finger his soul. he squinted at the angry sun creeping behind the topmost fringe of trees."

there's some more but maybe this is excessive, still a good exercise i think, writing the words out, feeling their mechanics and relation between each word as you type them back out. a good meditation.

i think in the quotes the pulse of the book becomes evident, this odd obsession with the second coming, the end times, the tension of the boy with not wanting eternity, but wanting the end. there is some other quote i am remembering now, the old man, he comes to learn not to hate the world which will be enwreathed in destruction but to hate the destruction which will come, that it must at all, i suppose. the boy it seems, has not learned this. the old man, his great uncle, stood in the city aiming to be a prophet, screaming about the end, he had a vision, or was touched, a finger of the sun burned him, i wonder if this is what is coming for the boy. i wonder what lopes towards the boy in fact. he is an odd character, the 'stranger' in one of the quotes, that is a voice in his head, leading him, in argument with... well not with faith, not supporting the devil, but this other vision of god perhaps, a more violent thing, less sentiment, less kindness, a world of cruel pains, the stranger in him reveals everything wrapped in rot to the boy, even the old man. it feels truthful to me, but that is how i am, and i wonder, are these poorly thought out ends, is this a freakish way of justifying oneself, the boy cannot bury the great uncle, he sets their two story shack ablaze after a man came to finish the job for him. of course, as flannery o'connor tends towards, the story contains some points about race as well, the boy seems racist, i imagine all the whites in the story will be, it's something she always aims to point at, to express as one of the miseries of the world, it's interesting how she handles it, that she couldn't not feel those ways herself while still trying to examine it and reckon with it as an abominable part of the world we are in.

the fear of eternity really fascinates me, he wants god to raze life almost, destroy everything so there is naught, the torture of his life, the boy only 14, feeling it so gravely. at times i still feel so tortured! we all do, there is a seduction in apocalypse, especially the christian apocalypse, the monsters, the four heads pointed at the corners of the universe, totality witnessed and wadded up and thrown out, it leaves me drooling, in some way, it's an erotic nightmare, to be congealed with everyone between two walls of blank night closing in, a meatgrinder returning us to ylem (those corpses who cannot be burned or buried).

reading her always brings me to highschool, exposed to her and cormac mccarthy, both were revelations of some kind. she is more of one than he i figure, a good man is hard to find shocked me in a really insane way. she is a special writer.

after this book i think i must return to genet. our lady of the flowers... finally...

i've cut my hair a little more, i think even if it's a little too high up now, the bangs are at least more even, this should make them sit more normally and make me not putz around with them so much. such an irritating thing.

reading o'connor, as well, i kept seeing in my head a vision of a church, the wood of the gothic flourishes a red, something vibrant almost, only revealed in the light, the laminate separating from the wood, and its grain felt even as you only stare, a wall rotting too, white walls, reeds all yellowed, a world turning in silence, the interior again, that closeup of something floral, the weight of prayer, all the knowing that goes into prayer, what is behind you haunts only, all accrued, forever, always, perhaps that is the boy's fear, sin behind you, nothing will raze it, you can only experience the terror of being forgiven and with no counter-gift you live a new life of freedom via debt.

here is something off a compilation i was listening to today, while playing a word game on nyt's game thingy + reading:

this feels fitting as well:

i think this is all today, i've continued the drawing, i redid some of the sleeve, i also had to redo the hand a bit and now it looks more... well the hand is now more detailed less sketchy so that gives me more solid ground to work with, i think. the new sleeve makes shading a little easier i think.

just did a little more to make it not look like her arm is broken. #swag.

i also plucked my eyebrows... hopefully that makes me look more feminine, or at least makes me feel not so disgusted by myself! i wonder if tomorrow i'll wake up and shower and totally hate how all this stuff frames my face or something. we will see. life is an experiment or maybe a rehearsal, like that country teasers song says.

one last song before sleep:

and,

so, or,

so,

and:

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[yellow-yarrow]

Plain text version of this post about Russian cosmism and Disco Elysium's lore part 2 :

Cosmist connections in Elysium’s lore Part 2 - Music and mathematics

From Sacred and Terrible Air:

He is an aristocrat, the comte de Pérouse and the comte de Mittrecie; but his hatred of the bourgeoisie, which have usurped the upper classes, makes him a proletarian and therefore a revolutionary. In the course of his life, Émile has also come to think of himself as a composer. He has a morbid thirst for fame, but he’s determined to win the hearts of the people with his dodecaphonic works. The comte’s sound is based on a strikingly modern geometric-symbolist system of harmonies that has nothing to do with the music of the rest of the civilised world. To the human ear, it sounds like unacceptable screeching. Émile considers the tonal, traditional sonority to be womb-shaped. A soul-soporific babble. The music of amoebas.

Millions and billions, hundreds of thousands of billions of young girls in love, they love me and my twelve-tone melody!

-

The twelve-tone technique, also known as the “twelve-tone technique organized in a series in which each note is related only to the next,” was Schoenberg’s revolutionary innovation that expanded the boundaries of musical composition. This method sought to create equal emphasis on all twelve pitches within an octave, eliminating any sense of hierarchy or tonal center. [1]

-

Nonetheless, much of his work was not well received. […]his work is usually defended rather than listened to, and that it is difficult to experience it apart from the ideology that surrounds it. [2]

-

Independently of his influential contemporary Arnold Schoenberg, Scriabin developed a much more dissonant musical language that had transcended usual tonality but was not atonal, which accorded with his personal brand of metaphysics. [3]

-

Alexander Scriabin, who was inspired by the Russian Cosmist ideas of his day, sought to unite humanity for a common task much like Fyodorov. He can be regarded as the most representative member of the artistic branch of Russian Cosmism. Scriabin's vision was to use artistic means to achieve Cosmist ends. His artistic vision, which was grounded in philosophy and spirituality, can be most clearly observed in his project Mysterium. [3]

-

'A seven-day tumult of light and sound, perfumes and pyrotechnics'

Scriabin’s work was Mysterium – a medieval miracle play raised to the point of cosmic transfiguration. A tumult of light and sound, perfumes and pyrotechnics, it would last seven whole days. And it would climax – its composer believed – with the end of the world as we know it and the birth of a new, ‘nobler’ human race. 

-

At the end of the Prefatory Action’s libretto, he wrote ‘We will all dissolve in the ethereal whirlwind We will be born in the whirlwind! And in the splendid luster Of the final flourish Appearing to each other In the exposed beauty Of sparkling souls We will disappear... Dissolve...’

-

“From the end, there, through the polar night, that music will resound. It will play on future phonographs. On magnets! Yet—it does not come from there. You’ll be famous, Monsieur Mittrecie, your music will reach us from the true end, even further beyond there, where all matter is but memory. So sounds the white light that shines into every darkroom, turning all revelations into nothingness.” He rises up on tiptoe, under the critic’s nose. “All revelations—I said—turn to naught!”

The little man finishes and bows to the comte. “Every single part was absolute, mathematical perfection.”

“Oh no, I’m not a critic,” the man replies, his eyes sparklin with admiration. “I’m a maths teacher.”

-

Joyce -"The further into pale you travel, the steeper the degree of suspension. Right down to the mathematical -- numbers stop working. No one has yet passed the number barrier. It may be impossible."

Abandoned Lorry - It looks like an article ripped out from a radio-enthusiast magazine. Complex mathematical equations explain the basics of something called 'the ULAN frequency system'.

"A pale latitude compressor is used to sort of… make the pale more manageable. With a lot of these, you can force a radio signal grid on the pale -- literally crunch the distance across it." (..) It's meant for forcing dimensions on something that doesn't have them. Needless to say, the frequencies used are… out of this world. "At the upper limit is the large prime number generator station. It's used specifically for pale latitude compression. That's why you may be hearing some numbers.

“It’s maths, right?” Jesper is sitting with his hands under his head. “Some mathematical rule explains this [the killer wave]?” (..) “but the same non-linear effect also explains the pale. They use it in entroponetics. This is how the pale behaves when it sweeps over the world.”

“That’s right, [Ulv] talks with the dead. They’ll come if he plays them some Van Eyck and old Rietveld.” (…) “He communicates with the pale.”

Soona, the Programmer - "It was mathematical information -- from the anomaly -- presented as a waveform. That's what it was technically -- theoretically…"

Endurance - The abstract shapes swelling in the foreground have done so in vain. This is a core matter. The answer, in the double-kick that moves the millilitres through your mind. The dark thud is the source of all rhythm, the inspiration behind mathematics… Endurance - The hard core.

-

“In any case, the secret of expanding our power over nature obviously lies in extending this method to the entire environment. The idea of a universal mathematics was prefigured in many ancient theories that shaped the science of numbers. Since the most ancient times, we find traces of this science among the Chaldeans and Babylonians, […] and, partly, the Gnostics, this research in numerical symbolism was transmitted to medieval philosophy, ”

-

“ In the nineteenth century, mathematics enjoyed an unprecedented heyday: in its countless applications, it became the basis of all modern technology and man’s real power over nature. Its meaning was the same as in the ancient teachings about numbers: the desire to express all things by means of numbers and the conviction that knowing the formula of a process or thing gave us the power to change and guide the process and thus create the thing. ”

-

the most perfect species of thought is thought encapsulated in numbers, the project and all its departments and units must consist of a system of formulas or numbers, each providing a key to a process performed by action. […] science in general must provide the formula of any and all possible actions in its theoretical and practical modes. […] However, numbers can be replaced with similarly effective signs or names, whose knowledge gives us dominion over nature. All these tasks clearly involve transforming nature, altering and improving what was heretofore produced by the spontaneous actions of its powers.

The quotes are from the following writings:

Unveiling the musical revolution: Schoenberg’s atonality and the innovation of twelve-tone system by giuseppe.bonaccorso

Arnold Schoenberg wikipedia page

Alexander Scriabin wikipedia page

Temples, incense, giant bells hanging from the clouds: the wild world of Scriabin's Mysterium BBC music magazine

A Universal Productive Mathematics by Valerian Muravyev from Russian Cosmism edited by Boris Groys

Disco Elysium, Sacred and Terrible Air by Robert Kurvitz

bonus: more about the Mysterium

[sysig]

I can't remember if you've done any drawings for this before, sorry, but I have a requestober prompt! Vargas ladyverse snake charmer au? Or ladyverse dryder au Scri, I feel like the potential for pretty spiderweb clothes is high there. I would request both, but I want to respect the rules ^^ Thank you!!

Day 27 - Skillfully spun sheer shawl

[disposal-blueeee]

another super self-indulgent chapter 20 / 21 drawing

edgar belongs to jhonen vasquez

scriabin belongs to @zarla-s

[kafka-ohdear]

hello 🥹🥹🥹! i'm sorry for seeing this reblog just now, but i'm really glad you listened and liked most of the songs i listed 😭😭 i'm so so happy that this post of mine helped you discover new songs and also that we have a really similar music taste.

i've only been knowing amelie for around three years, but the soundtracks and the film itself made a deep remark for me! comptine d'un autre ete is my favorite, still, i loved every single soundtrack in amelie though!

scriabin is my favorite composer for a reason XD! his music is literally magic,,, i think his synesthesia played a great role which has impacted his composition and style. the more i listened, the more i'm drawn into him. personally, i love his etudes, especially this version of horowitz (here!). his "the divine poem" is also beautiful.

by the way, if you are interested in rachmaninoff and scriabin's personal life, you'd know why i put them next to each other XD!

if you're also interested in folk music, i can probably give some recommendations too! i mostly listen to revolutionary songs and some folk songs as well, not too much but there are a few good ones i'd love to share.

i'm glad you liked timeless and big iron! i completely adored the lyrics and rhythm. sufjan stevens is one of my favorite artists, still, it's understandable that his music isn't your type.

aww, it's great to hear that you loved my native language as well 😭😭! it's a revolutionary song, so it's not that commonly loved (still one of my favorites hehe). i think you could try listen to other pieces of mendelssohn, i personally love his rondo capriccioso.

and also your music taste is awesome! chopin is also one (and the greatest) of the many composers that influenced scriabin, so i think perhaps that's why you liked scriabin quickly! i adored glinka music a lot (you can tell i have a huge bias for russian composers XD). ooh, and bastille too! i literally went through a phase of their music!

it feels so great to read your thoughts, i hope that we could talk more about classical music if you'd like to ! <333

tag game

rules: shuffle your on repeat playlist and list the first 10 songs that play, tag 10 people.

thank you for the tag, @liptonwashere <33

*

1. fantasy in b minor, op. 28 - alexander scriabin.

2. dark is the night.

3. rachmaninoff's piano concerto no.2 in c minor.

4. huế - sài gòn - hà nội - trịnh công sơn.

5. poems of ecstasy - alexander scriabin

6. string quartet no. 6 in f minor - felix mendelssohn.

7. comptine d'un autre été - yann tiersen.

8. big iron - marty robbins.

9. mystery of love - sufjan stevens.

10. timeless - taylor swift.

*

tagging: anyone who wants to participate since i think most people have already been tagged lmao.

[vargaslovinghours]

Neapolitan of boyfriends

Jake’s punchline is actually funnier IRL:

Absolutely blinding, that SparkleJake

[cherry-207]

Sleeping lads

This is my part of an artrade I made with @sysig :D plus a little bonus hehehe @zarla-s