#This is honestly part of the reason I'm so confused when people just write off wolves in Kotoko's story as her justice | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

patrophthia · 2 years ago

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red ears, and redder strings | theodore n.

pairing: theodore nott x hufflepuff!reader

genre: red string soulmate!au, fluff, slight humor, slight very slight angst, confused feelings, unrequited love but also not really?, not beta read

wc: 7.2k

this is a request ! thank you anon!! it’s so cute i loved writing this :>

there’s two OC, one of them is named mark, hufflepuff (based off of nct mark, i love that lil canadian guy) and elio. i also wrote theodore based off of nct’s jaehyun and sungchan hehe.

taglist: @mersmoon @pleasingregulus @l--absinthe

"I'm going to need a favour from you," I say first, his eye brows rising slightly at my words. "I need you to keep us being soulmates a secret."

"It's not you, I promise," I added quickly. "I'm sure you're a great guy, you're very handsome too but I'm just— I can't just let faith decide on who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. It's like I don't have a choice with what goes on in my life; and I can't ... have that."

"So I'm begging you, please," I plead. "Please, don't tell anyone about what we are."

"I can pay you." I offered. And If Nott wasn't so caught off guards by how I was able to say the exact things he had planned to say 30 minutes before, he would've laugh at the prospect of being paid when he already had a fortune in his hands. "I don't have much but I could also do your work for the year, just don't," I pause, "tell anyone until I'm ready, please."

Theodore won't admit it but he feels impress. Because deep down, the Slytherin in him would've never been able to beg for something the way I'd just beg of him. And if he wasn't so taken aback by how I basically read his mind, he would've said something more coherent than: "Okay."

"Okay." I repeated his words, nodding. And even though he didn't audibly give me a reason to trust him on it, I knew that he meant it.

A part of me thinks that that must've been why we were soulmates because why else would I so blindly trust him on this secret of ours.

Tug. Tug. Tug. Blaise has been tugging at Theodore's pinky for the last five minutes now. Doing it over and over just to get a rise out of the brunet. But Theodore, quite honestly, couldn't care less as he watched the string tied around his pinky finger bounce with each pull of Zabini's hand.

Blaise, like the menace he is, enjoys bothering his best friend by pulling at the red string of his, but seeing as he couldn't actually see the string, the Slytherin has settled with just laying on Theodore's bed and repeatedly pulling at his pinky which sported the string instead.

"Honestly Nott, why are you so against finding your soulmate? We both know they're in this school so why won't you just make the effort to find them?" Blaise asks, pulling at his pale pinky once more. "Here I am, balls deep into finding mine and I find out that they're all the way in Durmstrang. Do you realise just how lucky you are?"

"Zabini stop," their other dorm mate, Elio, tsked. "Maybe he's just not ready to find them yet."

Blaise turns from his position on Theodore's bed to look at Elio. Retorting, "or maybe he just doesn't want to find them?"

"And that's okay," Elio replied with a roll of his eyes. "I'm sure he has a reason."

Blaise's attention shifts back to Theodore. "And that is?"

Theodore clears his throat, "I just don't want one."

Blaise squints his eyes, "uh huh," he lets out in disbelief. "Somehow I don't believe that."

"Okay," he murmurs, "I just don't like the concept of soulmates."

"And that's all to it?" Elio asks, fixing his tie as he listens into Theodore and Blaise's conversation.

"Yes." And when neither Blaise nor Elio seemed to believe him, he added. "And I'm tired of people pretending to be my soulmate despite the fact that I could clearly see they aren't."

"People have done that?" Elio asked, perplexed at the complex.

"For the right price people would do anything." Theodore mumbled, and when he noticed that Elio was heading out the door, he asked. "Where are you going?"

"I'm meeting Mark at the library," Elio says with a blissful smile. "I'll see you at dinner."

When Elio finally leaves, Blaise turns to Theodore with a dumbfounded look. "Mark?"

Theodore feels his pinky being pulled once more. "His soulmate."

On the other side of the castle, Mark watches as I throw my head on the table —albeit, dramatically, a groan slipping from my lips. Mark giggles, his nose scrunching along with it as he asks me what was wrong.

I lift my left hand up and into his line of sight, his giggles turning into a full blown laugh as my pinky pulls itself over and over in the same direction. "They're doing it again?"

"They're doing it again," I mumbled, lifting my head back up to look at my finger. "It's so annoying. I'm going to punch their face in the second I see them."

"That's a bit extreme," Mark says lightly. "Just tell them to stop doing it or something."

"Why do that when I can result to violence." I replied, tugging at the string as a sign for them to stop. "They do it all the time, it's so irritating."

"Well at least you know they're close by," Mark states, going back to his book. "Or else you wouldn't be able to even feel their pulls."

"Yeah." I nodded. "I guess that's something."

"What?" Mark asks, sensing a slight shift in the atmosphere. "Do you not want to find them?"

I shrug, "not really."

"Why not?" Mark follows up, abandoning his work completely.

"I just think that I shouldn't let the universe decide on who I spend the rest of my life with, is all," I say. "I want to make that decision myself."

Mark nods, humming, "I see where you're coming from." Understanding as ever. "But I also think it's nice that there's someone out there who will always be by your side no matter what, whether it be platonic or romantic, you know?"

"But that's not guaranteed, is it?" I counter. "I've heard stories where people found their soulmates but they didn't care for one another at all. I mean, at the end of the day, soulmates can't actually be soulmates if one doesn't reciprocate the other's feelings. So why try finding them at all if you're going to find out that they want nothing to do with you?"

"But what if they do," Mark argued.

"But what if they don't."

Mark sighs, "and if they do?"

"And if they don't—"

"Hi." I was cut off. "Shit! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you," says Elio, eyes wide and apologetic. "What were you guys talking about?"

"Soulmates actually," Mark says with a smile, his pupils dilating at the sight of Elio. "Why are you here?"

Mark and Elio found out that they were each other's soulmate on the train ride over. Elio couldn't find his friend's carriage on the Hogswart Express and we were lucky enough to have empty space for the Slytherin.

"I wanted to see if you wanted to have dinner with me," Elio says. "And I also wanted you to meet my friends."

Who were, if I remembered correctly, Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, and Theodore Nott.

"Oh," Mark glances at me, then back at Elio. "This afternoon?"

"Yeah," Elio nodded. And I sense that he wanted to add 'when else' but held back against it. "At the Slytherin table, Is that okay?"

"Sure," Mark says, nodding quickly. "I'll see you."

Elio breaks into a smile, bidding a goodbye as he turns on his heels. "You're coming with me," Mark says the second Elio was far enough to not overhear us. "No arguments."

Two Hufflepuffs sitting idly chatting with four well known Slytherins must've been a weird sight for anyone that passes by. But Mark was having a fun time and that's all that matters.

Or to me at least. Mark sat to my left, with Elio sitting opposite him. Zabini was on my right, with Malfoy in front of him; leaving Nott right in front of me.

"Are you taking potions?" Zabini asks, trying to make conversation, seeing as Mark and Elio were the only people in this table who actually knew one another.

"Yep," I replied, placing my utensils down. "Are you?"

"The four of us are," Malfoy snickered. "At least there's two more tolerable people in that class with us."

Glad to know Malfoy found Mark and I tolerable. "So . . ." I drew out, thinking of anything we could chat about. "What did you guys do this summer?"

"Blaise dragged us to Europe to find his soulmate," Malfoy answered bitterly.

"Oh." The better part of me was intrigued, wanting to know if he did find them. I turned to Zabini beside me. "Did you find them?"

"No," he says, a slightly disappointed look on his face. "Too many students at Durmstrang and too little time."

"Well there's always next year," I say, trying to encourage him.

Zabini hums in agreement. "What about you? Have you found yours yet?"

Elio called out my name before I could answer his friend, and when I turned to him, he held out a goblet filled with pumpkin juice for me to take. Reaching for the glass, I felt a tug at my pinkie but paid no heed to it as I took the goblet from Elio's hand. Resting it on the table, my eyes caught onto a twinkle of red glowing right in front of me.

With furrowed brows, my line of sight found its way to the seat opposing mine, and along with it, the person who took the spot. Red string wrapped around his left pinkie, just like mine. Glowing slightly under the candle light.

Realisation settles in as I slowly look up at Nott, taking in his blank wide eyed expression that seemed to be processing the same information as I was.

Just to be sure, my hand reaches upwards to rub at my eyes before my vision falls back once more to my left pinkie, then the red string that connects me to the boy right in front of me.

Theodore Nott was my soulmate.

"Can you pass me the salt?" Malfoy asks Nott from his side, causing the brunet to break out of his trance.

Our eyes met for the briefest second, unspoken understanding warming up within me. And when Nott shifts his attention to where the salt currently resides, the tip of his ears shined as red as the string tethering us to one another.

The Marauders map is a great stalker tool to have. I didn't have it per se, but I knew people who did and they were kind enough to lend it to me when I needed it. I owe Harry a favour for this.

My eyes glance between the footsteps on the map tagged: Theodore Nott, and the corridor in front of me. Trying to be as quiet as I could with each corner I turn, if I were to get caught chasing some guy who seemed to be coming my direction at eleven P.M at night then who knows the kind of punishment I would get.

Theodore was walking with purpose when I found him. He walked with enough purpose for me to need to jog after him just to catch up. A hand latches onto his wrist, pulling him into one of the many secret corridors Hogswart held.

"Hi," I said breathlessly, panting as I watched him decide between fighting or flighting. He seemed to have found me harmless, settling on just gazing down at me instead. "Just give me a second to catch my breath."

There were many things he didn't say, just observing as I tried to calm myself down. I noticed a few things then about him, he was tall, lanky even, his doe eyes and hair the direct contrast of his pale skin, and his jawline was sharp enough to cut through wood.

"Uhm—" I stood up to my full height and found that I had to peer up at him. Freakishly tall motherfucker. "—I'm not going to waste your time by beating around the bush, so I'm just going to spill it."

"Actually I needed to have a word with you," he murmurs. And I have to reel myself over because that must've been the first time I heard him speak.

"Well, I found you first so I speak first," I tell him with a tight lip smile. "You can speak after okay? Okay."

His eyes squinted and I could tell that he was frustrated with not being able to get his words in.

"I'm going to need a favour from you," I say first, his eye brows rising slightly at my words. "I need you to keep us being soulmates a secret."

"It's not you, I promise," I added quickly. "I'm sure you're a great guy, you're very handsome too but I'm just— I can't just let fate decide on who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. It's like I don't have a choice with what goes on in my life; and I can't ... have that."

"So I'm begging you, please," I plead. "Please, don't tell anyone about what we are."

"I can pay you." I offered. And If Nott wasn't so caught off guard by how I was able to say the exact things he had planned to say 30 minutes before, he would've laughed at the prospect of being paid when he already had a fortune in his hands. "I don't have much but I could also do your work for the year, just don't," I pause, "tell anyone until I'm ready, please."

Theodore won't admit it but he feels impressed. Because deep down, the Slytherin in him would've never been able to beg for something the way I'd just beg of him. And if he wasn't so taken aback by how I basically read his mind, he would've said something more coherent than: "Okay."

"Okay." I repeated his words, nodding. And even though he didn't audibly give me a reason to trust him on it, I knew that he meant it.

A part of me thinks that that must've been why we were soulmates because why else would I so blindly trust him on this secret of ours.

Platonic soulmates. That's what Theodore and I decided on. Well not really, Theodore had brought up the idea of cutting our soulmate ties completely with a spell he'd found but the Hufflepuff in me couldn't actually go through with the idea so we decided on platonic soulmates. Or just classmates who are hiding a secret that would blow up in their faces if anyone found out.

Hogsmeade weekend came faster this year; Mark and I (along with four other Slytherins who'd found their way into our friend group) were lucky enough to make the trip.

It hasn't begun snowing yet, although the weather sure felt like it. The temperature was warmer this morning, which was why I found it unnecessary to bring my jacket, and now, in hindsight, I see that that was a terrible idea.

It was getting late, and the weather was not getting warmer at all. "Dude, are you okay?" Mark asks. Dude must sound weird to the other four pure bloods. But dude, to me, was Mark showing that he cared for me. "You've been shivering for the past five minutes."

"I'm fine," I say, a clear lie and we all know it. "I'll just cast a warming spell, don't worry."

Mark's brow furrowed, "are you sure? Here—" he shrugs off his coat, "—just wear mine."

I didn't have to look around to know that the four Slytherin were watching us. And under any other circumstances I would gladly take Mark's jacket, but that was a somewhat intimate thing to do. Especially in front of his soulmate, so, like the civilised person I am, I shook my head and cast a warming spell on myself.

"Dude stop being stubborn, you're literally freezing."

"And I look good doing it so just take your coat, Mark." I argued.

"Okay then." He sighs. "If that's what you want."It's not. Mark pulls his coat back on as he continues walking down the Hogsmeade streets with the rest of us behind him and Elio. "So where should we go next?"

A grasp on my elbow, takes my attention away from Malfoy's answer to Mark's question. I look down, finding slim hands holding onto me. My gaze trails upward to find Theodore who had halted both our steps as he shrugs off his coat.

The brunet nudges it forward, wordlessly offering it for me to take. And when I shook my head, feeling uneasy at the prospect of making him suffer the harsh weather if I did take his jacket. He insists: "It's fine," he says, nudging it forward once more, the red string on his pinkie clear as ever. "I run hot."

"And is cold blooded," Zabini snickered to receive a glare from Nott. I stifled a giggle, finally feeling at ease with the two of them. Zabini's demeanour seems to soften at my half assed attempt to hide a laugh, and tells me to: "Just take it."

Okay. Fine. I will take it. The cold was biting my ass anyways. I reached out for the jacket but was pleasantly surprised when Nott helped me into it instead. "Thank you," I murmured.

Theodore, or at least his coat, smells like a combination of things that I could only assume he likes; things like: the sea, books whether it be old or new, earl grey tea, bearded irises, and vanilla.

Nott only hums at my gratitude, listening back into Mark's conversation with Malfoy.

"You never did tell me whether you found your soulmate yet," Zabini says suddenly. "Have you?"

"No," I answered, and unlike earlier, he actually believes in this lie of mine. "And I'm not really looking for one either."

"Funny," Blaise says with a mischievous smile. "That's what Nott also said." Not exactly, but it was something along that line. "Are you sure you're not each other's soulmate?"

From the corner of my eyes, I spy the tip of Theodore's ears flushing. The pink contrasting his dark features adorably. His face showed no emotion, his brown doe eyes rolling with feign annoyance. "I'm pretty sure I'd know my soulmate if I saw them as often as I see her, Zabini."

"Wish it were that easy," I mumbled, adding onto the illusion of us not being tied to each other. "I'll let you know when I find out who they are though."

"Really?" He says testingly.

"If you're so invested in it then yes."

He smirks, "let's hope you keep your promise then, princess."

Little did Zabini know, his promise had already been broken.

Faith must've been playing some kind of sick joke. I knew that I'd be taking potions with the four Slytherin, but for me to be studying a love potion on the first day I had class with my 'soulmate' was just plain evil.

And I think, something along the lines of Professor Slughorn making Nott and I be the first to take a gander at the potion, to smell it and to describe what it smelled like to us, was even more cruel.

A glance at Nott, and another at the brewing pot in front of us, had me taking in a deep breath as I prepared myself for what's to come. I took a step forward, Nott to my side, and leaned forward to take a sniff at the potion.

The first round of scents were pleasant, home cooked meals, the smell of my clean room after a tiring day, my favourite snack and the likes of it. Then the second waft of the potion hits and I wondered whether it was what I was actually attracted to or what I was supposed to be attracted to since all I could smell was nothing but Nott.

Or at least the scent of his coat; sea salt, books, vanilla and a hint of his (what I think is) argan oil shampoo, which I assumed I could only smell because he was so close by.

"So?" Professor Slughorn egged us on with a smile. "Tell us what you smell."

Nott and I shared a look and I knew then that we could only smell one another. "The sea," I took the initiative to speak first. "Vanilla."

"Is that all?" Asks the Professor. "Is there a special someone you smell?"

Yes. Is what I didn't say, only shaking my head as I nudged at Nott's side for him to speak next.

"I'm sorry Professor but I couldn't really smell anything." Nott says barely above a whisper.

Professor Slughorn's furrowed his brows in concern. Did Nott not have something he loved? "Nothing at all?"

"Not really," the Slytherin murmurs. "I could only smell her."

Her?

Oh.

Me. I'm her.

Okay.

"Really?" Slughorn murmurs, clearly fascinated. "Well isn't that interesting?"

Nott only hums, moving away from the pot and as I turned with him, my eyes caught onto the pink tinged on his ears. Cute.

I couldn't even take a step towards my desk when Zabini swept me away, Malfoy by his side. Zabini smiles widely at my curious expression, and I wonder for a second if Nott has broken his promise and told them about our secret. Cautiously, I asked him. "What?"

"We need a favour."

"No." Was my first and final answer. Zabini only frowns, not the slightest bit faltering his quest. "I need you to steal Theodore away for a day." He says, instead. I shook my head, repeating myself, "No."

"Oh come on," Blaise pouts, "his birthday's this Sunday and we want to throw him a small surprise party."

"Which won't be a surprise if he was there," Malfoy adds unnecessarily.

"Why can't you be the one to distract him or whatever you're planning on making me do?"

"Because he'll suspect it," Malfoy answers with a roll of his eyes. "Nott's smart, he'll get suspicious of us."

"And he won't get suspicious of me?" I retorted.

"I haven't thought that through actually," Blaise murmurs. "But! We need all hands on deck to plan the party and fill it up with things he likes."

"And I can't help with that?" I ask.

Malfoy rolls his eyes. "What do you know about Nott?"

That he is my soulmate. But besides that, quite literally nothing. Okay. One point to Malfoy and Zabini, I guess. I sigh, slowly accepting my defeat. "What about Mark?"

"Mark's going to help us set up with Elio."

"Why can't you ask for the house elves to set it up for you?"

"Why can't you stop asking us questions?" Malfoy snaps.

I turn to the blond, my expression sour. "Hey you're the one asking me for a favour here, I don't think you can afford to be a bitch to me right now."

Malfoy rolls his eyes again, more attitude than ever. "So you're going to do it?"

"I never said—"

"Great!" Blaise cuts me off. "Have Theo out by ten A.M and have him back by six P.M, okay?" He says excited, and yet not loud enough for Nott, who had been sitting three desks away from our conversation to hear. "Okay! And if you guys do anything, please use protection we're way to young to have kids—"

"Oh fuck off." With a chuckle, Zabini finally leaves me alone, dragging Malfoy with him. With the two Slytherins no longer in sight, my eyes drift towards the only empty desk left and make my way towards it.

One, two, table passes, until I finally reach an empty seat and I find myself meeting eyes with Theodore. His face remains stone cold as ever, only looking at me blankly. He didn't have to say it for me to know that was curious about what his friends had said to me.

Setting my stuff down, I sat beside him and I found myself mustering up the courage to go through with Zabini and Malfoy's favour. "Hey," I start, Nott now giving me his undivided attention. "Do you want to go out this weekend?"

His expression changes for the slightest second that if I hadn't been watching him, I'd have missed it. "I thought we agreed on keeping it platonic."

"Yeah," I agreed quickly. "And that's not going to change anytime soon. Think of this as us bonding as platonic soulmates."

He guessed he owed me that, which was why he stood outside of the Hufflepuff's Common Room idly, waiting for me to come out and get on with our soulmates bonding day.

A smile came across my lips when I spotted him, looking as out of place as possible. "Hi," I said, going up to him. Theodore didn't bother replying, only standing tall as he waited for me to lead the way.

The ride to Hogsmeade was awkward —as to be expected from two people who knew little to nothing about one another. Theodore climbed out of the carriage first, offering a hand to help me off of the ride.

Before we began our journey, Theodore caught onto my wrist with his right hand, his left reaching for his wand and wordlessly, he casted a warming up spell on me.

"Thank you." I'd be lying if I said that it didn't have an effect on me. "So where should we go?"

His lips pursed, thinking. "You didn't plan anything?"

"Not really." This favour was a last minute thing, I didn't have time to actually plan things out. "I thought we could just walk around and look at things."

Theodore wasn't the easiest to read, but I knew from the shift in his features that he was judging me. He then nudges his head to the side. "Let's get you something to eat."

Theodore took me to a bakery by the end of Hogsmeade, the shop was heavily vanilla scented, people coming in and out every second. Nott ordered a vanilla danish, then another when he looked at my face.

I ordered my pastries, and reached into my bag for the sickles I needed. Before I could actually get it out though, Theodore was already pulling me to the side, mumbling a "don't bother" as the next customer made their order.

I frown, handing out the few sickles I owed towards him, he took a glance at my hand, then back to my face. "What did I just say?"

"I can't just let you pay for me."

He didn't say anything, but his expression alone suggests that he won't be taking my money anytime soon.

"Seriously, dude, I can't just let you pay for me."

"Let's go," Theodore deflects, taking a parcel filled with our purchases when the shop's clerk handed it out to us.

I followed after him, not before attempting to shove my money into his pockets and failing to do so when he shifted away from me. "You're being rude."

"Oh I'm being rude?" Theodore scoffs, and I think that that must've been the first time I hear real emotions in his voice. "For paying for you?"

"Yeah," I replied. "Paying for someone is only nice when they want you to pay for them."

"Well," he murmurs. "What's so wrong with me paying for you when you want me to pay for you."

"Don't gaslight me!"

Theodore smiles at my word, a small laugh bubbling out of him. "I'm doing no such things." And then, he adds in a mocking manner, "dude."

What an ass.

I led Theodore towards The Three Broomsticks, if he wasn't going to take my money then I'll just have to get him something in return. I ordered two butterbeers as he began unwrapping our pastries.

He handed mine to me and dug into his vanilla danish. A minute passes, the two of us eating in silence and I wondered if I should've just taken him to a movie instead, maybe then it'd be less awkward.

The butter beer arrives and I took a sip, wiping my lips with the back of my hand right after. "You have a little something—" my finger points towards my upper lips "—there."

He made quick work in wiping it off, eyes casting down as he turned his head to pick up a tissue paper. His red ears made a reappearance then, embarrassed as ever.

After we finished our meals, Theodore excuses himself as he heads towards the bathroom. I think then that this was the perfect opportunity; I called out to one of the shop's clerks and when they approached, I asked for the check.

The shop clerk, an elderly lady, frowns, "what are you talking about, love? Your boyfriend already covered it."

What? "I'm sorry, you must've gotten me mixed up with another table, I haven't paid yet."

"No?" She frowns. "The brunet, pale, about ye height—" the woman gestures over her head "—isn't with you?"

With me, yes. Boyfriend, no. "Did he pay?"

"Yes," she smiles, "just a second ago really."

If I could scream out of frustration I would. I glared at Theodore when he returned, he seemed to know what had happened as he walked with pride.

"You're not as smart as you think you are," he says, grabbing his things. "I knew what you were thinking."

"Well." I stood up, gathering my things as well. "What am I thinking right now?"

"What an ass I am." Smart ass.

"Lucky guest." I murmur.

"Is it now?" He replied testingly, taking my things from my hands.

I squint my eyes, looking at him threateningly. "I will destroy you, Theodore Nott."

"I'd like to see you try." The amount of stuff in his hands made him look ridiculous, walking out of the inn with little to no expression at all when he adds: "soulmate."

I returned Theodore to his friends by six, having snuck into the ladies room to send a patronus to Mark before doing so. Not a minute goes by when his patronus returns, a cheetah opening up its mouth to cheerfully say: "Okay dude, We're ready for you!"

I did what was asked of me and brought him to the room of requirements, Theodore trailed after me, clearly confused but never uttering a word about it.

Once we arrived in front of the door, I turn to meet his eyes. "Why didn't you tell me today was your birthday?"

He blinks. "It wasn't important."

"Your birthday isn't important to you?"

"No." He murmurs. "Why are we here?"

I push the door open, and it takes him a few seconds to realise what had happened. Elio jumps out, Mark by his side screaming as loudly as they could "happy birthday!"

Theodore stares at them for a bit before turning to me, "is that why you spent the day with me?" He asks first. "They put you up to this?"

If I heard disappointment in his tone, I didn't let it get to me. Mustering up a small smile, I push him towards his friends. "Enjoy your party, Theo."

Elio and Blaise swept him away, pulling him towards one of the corners where the snacks were placed. My expression must've been telling, of what exactly, I didn't know. But Mark seems to notice it, asking me in a quiet hush. "Are you okay?"

I nod distractedly. "Yup, why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know," Mark frowns, "you look a little off."

I smile at him. Mark knows me better than I knew myself. "I'm fine," I reassured him, "just a little tired."

"Okay," Mark says, leaving it at that with a sceptical look. "Let's get you something to drink."

"Was today just a ruse to get me away from the castle?"

Theodore had found me an hour after we arrived, looking distracted as ever when he handed over a slice of cake he'd saved for me.

"What?"

"You didn't actually want to bond with me, did you?"

I thought over my options, should I lie to him or just let him know the truth. Deciding on the latter, I tell him: "yeah, Zabini and Malfoy asked me to—" the clench in his jaw caught my attention "—wait, are you upset?"

Truthfully, Theodore says, "yes."

To say I was baffled was an understatement. "Why? What's wrong? Do you not like the party?"

"No," he counters. "It's not the party, the party's fine."

A beat passes by, Theodore hesitating. And then, finally, he says. "It's you."

"Me?" Have I done something to upset him? "Did I say something—"

"I thought you wanted to spend the day with me."

"I'm sorry." I'm not sure why exactly I was apologising but it felt like the right thing to do. "But to be fair, you didn't actually want to spend the day with me, did you?"

He avoids my eyes and I knew then that things can no longer be platonic. "I think you should leave before I do something idiotic."

"Like?"

"Kiss you."

How does one respond to that? His ears aren't red this time round. The look on his face is torn between hesitancy and distress. And I was stupid enough to reach up to him, a palm cradling his face, meeting his dark eyes.

A second passes and when he doesn't make to move away, I stand up to the tip of my toes and press my lips onto his. Theodore leans down, easing the strain of my neck as he kisses back without missing a beat.

A bump of the nose causes us to pull back, looking at one another with wide blown eyes before a subtle glow catches our attention. Tied to our pinkies, the string glows red, a shot of spark passing from his end towards mine only for it to lose its light when none comes from my side to ignite it.

What the spark means exactly, I didn't know. But I will not spend another second waiting around to see what it might meant. "That was a mistake," I say quickly, gathering my things. "Goodnight, Theodore."

I didn't know why I didn't notice it at first, but as I walked away, slice of cake in hand; the feel of plastic beneath the cake caught me off guard. I bring it into my eyesight, a vanilla danish neatly wrapped with a note attached to its side.

It seems like you've got me wrapped around your finger. Do me a favour and don't let it linger.

Blaise had a theory. And that theory consists of his two friends who had yet to find their soulmates. Or so they say.

Gathered around the room of requirement were the same people who attended Theodore's birthday party, give or take five people less.

Blaise stands in the middle of the room, the rest of us lounging on the sofa as we watch him speak. "Come here you," he points at Theodore, then he turns to me, "you as well."

My nerves gets the better part of me, causing me to glance at Theodore for help despite knowing that we were both drowning in the same boat. Did Blaise know about us being soulmates? Did Theodore tell him about it? Maybe I shouldn't have trusted him so blindly.

"You two," he says loudly. "Have been lying to us!" And then, a few notches down, he adds, "I think."

My brows furrowed, feigning innocence. "How so?"

Like a magician, he lifts up his hand dramatically, then grabs Theodore's pale hand in it. And in my eyes, the string was as visible as ever. I think I know where he was going with this and there's nothing to prepare me for what's to come next.

"Pay attention to her fingers okay?" Blaise instructs. I feel faint, dizzy, all the adjectives for nauseousness as each second passes by. "Her soulmate pinkie to be exact."

This is it. This is when they find out and Mark hates me for the rest of his life because I didn't tell him I'd found my soulmate.

Mark frowns, his bottom lips caught in his teeth as he watches on sceptically.

Blaise pulls at Theodore's pinkie, the same exact motion he'd done on end for the last couple of months. And, just like it had before, my finger pulls to Theodore's direction. Blaise pulls at it again and the same set of motions repeats itself.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Elio spoke first.

"Well," I began, everyone's attention turning to me. "Because, it's not your fucking business." Mark stifles a laugh at my words. "Theodore and I chose to keep it a secret for a reason."

"And that reason is?" Malfoy chimes in.

I didn't have to say anything for Theodore to know what I wanted them to know. "We didn't want soulmates."

"And now?" Blaise follows up. "Do you still not want soulmates?"

"Honestly?" I say. "I don't know."

It takes Theodore five seconds to note Mark's arrival at the Slytherin table. And it takes him another three seconds to notice that I wasn't there with them.

Mark chats animatedly with Elio, not once pausing to explain my lack of appearance at tonight's dinner.

Maybe they've grown too fond of me, or maybe Blaise likes me more than Theo thought he did, because he was quick to ask Mark where I was. "Doll's, not having dinner with us tonight?"

"No." Mark didn't even bat an eyelash at the pet name Blaise used. "She caught a cold and asked me to bring her something when I get back."

Theodore eyebrow's knit together curiously. "She's not in the infirmary?"

If the people at the table noticed the hint of concern in his voice, they didn't show it. Well —everyone except Mark that is. A gasp falls from his lips, staring at Theodore with wide eyes. Did he fancy his best friend?

Mark catches himself, shaking his head as he explained. "She said that it was just a common cold and that it'll go away soon. She didn't want to waste Madam Pomfrey's time when she could be focusing on something more pressing."

And when Theodore's eyes narrows. Mark feels the need to clarify himself. "Her words, not mine."

Theodore stands up then, excusing himself as he tells Mark not to worry about me and that he'll get something for me to eat. Mark didn't even get a chance to remind him about my meds before he slipped away and into the kitchens.

Mark didn't stress over it though, something in him knew that Theodore would not forget my medications.

A set of knocks lands on my door, approximately fifteen minutes later. And with a groggy "come in" from my bed; the door clicks open, Theodore standing behind it with a tray of food floating behind him.

"Theo?" I rub my eyes, unsure of what I was seeing. "What are you doing here?"

"Mark tells me you're sick." Did he? "So I brought you dinner." That's ... nice of him to do.

Theodore stands awkwardly by the door, not stepping an inch into a room. A part of me wonders if he was a vampire, waiting to be formally invited in before he could actually do anything. "You can come in."

The tray of food floats over first, resting just on top of my bedside table. Theodore follows in after it, staying a few feet away from my bed. "Wait, who let you in? Through the barrels and stuff?"

"No one in particular." He says. "They left the entrance open."

That was the hufflepuff way of doing things.

"Well thank you." My palm lays flat on my bed, pushing all of my body weight to a seating position. "For this. I know you'd rather spend the night doing something more fun than doing Mark a favour."

Theodore frowns, coming over to my side. "Mark didn't ask me to do this," he tells me; his hand carefully reaching for my arm, the other pressing against the small of my back to help me sit up properly. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

My attempt to resist teasing him was futile, even sick and on the verge of dying, I still think that Theodore's reaction to things —if there was one that is— was adorable. "Awh, did you miss me?"

Theodore didn't bother to say no. He didn't have to, it was clear by the hesitant look on his face that he did miss me. Even if I'd only just seen him yesterday.

"You should eat," he says instead, the glimpse of his tinging red ears not missed by me when he handed me a glass of water. "Drink this, eat, then take your medications."

A roll of my eyes paired with an 'I know' has him standing straight. And somehow, I get the feeling that he thinks he might've overstepped my boundaries. Not knowing what to say —or do for that matter, I settled on telling him: "thank you, again. I really appreciate it, Theo."

Theodore hums and we could both sense that our conversation was ending, but, strangely enough, despite never knowing what to say in front of him, I can't seem to just let him slip away tonight.

A glance at the tray Theo brought, then another back at him, had me asking a question I might be regretting minutes later. "Have you eaten, Theo?"

His eyes fell down onto my hand, the floor, anything but my face. The corner of his lips twists, a small dent in his cheek barely hiding his attempt to bite back a smile. He knew where I was going with this. "No."

A shift to the side, a pat on the empty seat besides me. "Good." I say first. "We can share."

The string tied to our pinkie glows, and this time, unlike the first, the sparks meets in the middle, igniting brighter than it has ever done before.

Being sick gave me a lot of time to reflect. And even more time for me to realise that me saying 'I don't know' complicates things. Everyone seems to be walking around eggshells when the topic of Theodore and I came up and quite frankly I'm fucking tired of it.

Theodore likes me. We're soulmates. This should be easy. I know how I feel, I can make things work.

Like feels childish. Love feels too strong. Infatuated is what I'm not when it comes to Theodore. I care for him the same way he cares for me. That should say something shouldn't it?

What I recently learned about Theodore is that he takes up an entire table at the library. Just him alone, and the whole table that would usually host four students all because he works in a mess.

"Uhm—" he looks up at me. "—can I sit here?"

He nods and turns back to his book. Not moving a single thing to the side. I sigh, organising his mess to one side and making a mental note to tell him off about it later. But for now, I ought to get my feelings sorted out.

"I wanted to talk to you," I say first. Theo hums, signalling that he was listening to me. "Can you look at me, please?"

He looks up from his page and shoved his book to the side, giving me his full undivided attention.

"I thought about it and I don't want to be platonic soulmates anymore," I tell him.

He looks in thought. "So you came here to say that you want to sever the soulmates connection?"

"No!" I say quickly, eyes wide. "No, not that. At all."

He seems to know what was going to come next, the corner of his lips turning upwards but he stops himself, not wanting to get too excited. "What is it then?"

"I care for you," I tell him. "And if you still care for me, I want to give this soulmate thing a shot."

His eyes soften. "Of course, I still care for you." He replies. "And I'm assuming by care you mean love?"

I pursed my lips, going over what I wanted to say and being careful with how I choose to phrase it. Finally, I decided on: "Not love per se," I say first. "Just us taking a step towards it."

" 'course not," he replies. "Baby steps, right?"

"Right," I say, feeling awkward under his gaze. "Baby steps." And then, I added. "Now if we're going to make this soulmate thing work out we need to actually go out."

He nods. "I'll take you to dinner on Friday then."

"Sure." A smile creeps onto my face. "It's a date." The tip of his ears reddens at my words, cute as ever. "I can't wait to see your cute little butt then."

Theodore fixes me a look between amused and judging, he breaks after a bit, shaking his head with a small chuckle. Incredulously he says, "I can't believe I'm in love with you."

"Woah there dude, you're moving a little fast," I said with a small smile. "Slow it down a bit, will you?"

"Too late, my love." And if I had a small liking towards the guy, my feelings were definitely amplified by his stupidly dumb sense of humour. "I've already gotten your name tattooed on my buttocks."

— from bee: i havent wrote in so long, this was so fun!! i always love writing theo so this was just a blast hehe

notes/reblog/feedbacks are greatly appreciated!!

#theodore nott humor #theodore nott x you #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott x y/n #theodore nott x hufflepuff!reader #theodore nott fanfiction #theodore nott fanfic #theodore nott #theodore nott imagines #theodore nott fluff #theodore nott scenarios #Spotify #theo nott x reader #theo nott x you #🧳: my writing

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cafecourage · 10 months ago

Note

Little Red Riding Hood where Reader is Little Red but also a werewolf

Love Interest and rest of chain can be assigned however

(Cause I'm always down for a fairytale au)

I did a little twist on this. Idk if this was what you wanted. I had to ask doggo experts for how doggos act around each other. I am leaving this off on a small cliff hanger because I do want to write more of this.

Twilight didn’t trust the new person in the group. Well. It’s more like he didn’t know what to think of her. She came in like a hurricane running after the Shadow like it was her prey. Then when the dust settled and she calmed down the group quickly learned of why. The short of it being that for some reason the Shadow attacked her brother and she took chase. Which then led to her to finally agree to join the chain. Much to the Ranchers chagrin. However, he knows better than to start an unnecessary fight. Twilight could be civil.

Civility could only go so far.

Little Red, as Warrior’s likes to call her, noticed Twilight’s presence and slight unease of her and ran with it. Twilight couldn’t understand just why she was always running circles around him talking about this and that. It confused him to no end when she instantly would stick to him even when he was wolfie. He had to on more then one occasion threaten to bite Little Red’s hands. She never cared or backed away from Wolfie when he showed a bit of aggression. “He is going to bite you.” Wild warned her as he watched Little Red try to play with Wolfie.

She looked up at Wild while holding Wolfie’s face, “what? No the baby is just playing.” That comment only made Twilight growl more.

“Baby? Wolfie isn’t a baby.” Wild was torn between being completely amuse and helping Twilight out as he did know about his slight distrust of Little Red.

“No no no, Champion. This is a wolf pup. He has to be like…” Her attention draws to the wolf as she observes the good boy. “Man… I have to say maybe 10? He is very small even for that age. Wolfie is like an adult dog size but he is definitely a wolf.” She boops the snoot and quickly pulled back as Twilight tries to bite her hand again. This only makes her giggle more.

“I think your wolves might be just bigger than my Hyrules.” Honestly to Wild, Wolfie was the same size as most wolves, but he just shrugs and not questions that further. Twilight couldn’t understand why you were like this, he wonders if it was just an eccentric thing. He has met a lot of weird people in his life and Little Red might be one of them. After being free from your grasp he takes it upon himself to run away for now. Only because you don’t tend to grab his face while being Twilight and thats the most annoying part of being wolfie around you.

It wasn’t until they finally came to her era that he finally understood.

The village Little Red lived in was small, but cozy. It reminded Twilight of his own home. People tended to light up when seeing Little Red. But given the size of the group following them most villagers tended to just say hi and remarks that they needed to talk to her later. “My house is a bit further.” Little red said pointing to a path that ran into the woods. “It’s just me, my brother and Grandma oh and our cat. I’ll make sure to keep her out of your stuff. But we should have room to fit everyone.” She explains as the path slowly clears up to a cottage in the wood with a small garden. There was a small pup running around in the yard playing with said cat. Who was purely annoyed at ready to pap the puppy in the head.

Little Red’s eyes brightened “Link!” She calls out gaining the Pups reaction.

She dashes towards the house as the puppy starts running towards her. They meet halfway and the puppy shifts into a young boy. “You’re back! You’re back!” This Link giggles as he gets lifted in the air by his sister and spun around.

“I am! For now.” Little red nuzzles her brother’s face as she shifts her grips on her brother to put his weight on her hip. “Boy’s this is my brother. Link these are the adventurers I’ve been traveling with.”

She turns to the group with a smile. The chain was utterly confused and silent before Wind speaks up “Did he transform into a wolf?”

#twilight (not lu) speaks #linked universe x reader #luxreader #linkeduniverse x reader #monkey bread #I had to make this Twilight centric

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mandiemegatron · 2 months ago

Note

Why kill off the reader in the second part of losing the war? I was expecting Kidd or Killer to get hurt or something but killing the reader? Tell us you don't care about your readers without telling us you don't care about your readers. Who the fuck kills off the READER? Take the L and maybe stop acting like your writing is better than it actually is.

*deep breath*

Okay.

I've received a handful of anons similar to this one and I didn't think I'd have to come on here to break down my ideas and give reasons as to why I wrote something the way I did, but clearly some people are pretty pressed over my choices for Just Come Home. Everything under the readmore so I don't clog up people's dash.

Let's break this down one point at a time. So firstly, my choice to kill off the Reader was actually a last-minute decision while finishing it off. My original idea was reader never forgives Kid and decides to fight Kid and Killer instead, losing and being left for dead (for Law to find), but decided, why not even more hurt? More pain and more anguish, as I was asked to put Kid through via some askers/anons. I found the best way to do that, was to kill off the reader. Have them make amends only to have that ripped from Kids hands and destroyed with a simple flick of the wrist, and honestly, the fact that I had myself in tears while writing it gave me the motivation to continue with that idea.

I also wanted to delve into trying my hand at Law who felt backed into a wall and decided to spill blood, all for the sake of having an upper hand, and if that meant he had to off the reader to keep that upper hand, then so be it. I wanted to write something different from my usual angst, something a little more devastating and I feel like I hit that mark pretty damn close. Truly, I'm sorry you feel differently about it.

Secondly, don't you EVER come into my inbox and point fingers, saying I don't care about my readers. Buddy, I probably care TOO MUCH about my readers, about what they think and about how they feel when reading my writing. This is incredibly hurtful for you to come up here and essentially scream in my face that this isn't good enough. I need you to understand that if you dont enjoy something, that means it wasn't written for YOU. Not everything you come across is going to be to your taste and it's insanely self-centered and entitled of you to come in here and tell me I don't give a fuck about my readers because YOU thought it was stupid. It feels like you're taking this a little personally and I don't understand why.

Lastly, i don't sit here and brag about my writing. In fact, I feel like I stay pretty quiet other than some self reblogs of things I've written when I'm feeling that certain blorbo. It's confusing and again, hurtful, for you to come in here and essentially tell me to shut the fuck up... on my own blog. That's some strange activities there, buddy. I think you maybe need to log off for a bit, go sit in nature and do some deep breathing because this is crossing the line over to chronically online. Please go outside for a bit. Please revise your manners and remember the golden rule. You don't have to be religious for you to understand "treat others the way you want to be treated".

Do better.

#answered ask #anonymous #anon asks will be turned off after this posts.#writers should not have to defend their writing or their ideas - even if you think it was a stupid idea.#some people lost their manners during covid and nows the time to re-find them.

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misc-obeyme · 1 year ago

Note

I love your fat Mc headcannons so much!!! As a chubby person with low self esteem they are honestly really comforting, If you feel like if I’d love to see you write for the datables too.

Okay, considering I got two requests for this, here it is, part three with the dateables!

(And while I did not include Luke of course, I do think he would be confused about a fat MC having low self esteem. He doesn't get it, but he gets it bothers you and I think he'd just go out of his way to hug you because you're so squishy.)

I would also like to say that I'm really happy that these headcanons have been comforting. I've come a long way in my own self esteem and body image journey and I think that's the only reason I was able to write these at all. It's one thing to say these fictional characters will love and accept you the way that you are, but it's been my experience that real life people will, too. At least, the ones that matter do. The rest can fuck off lol.

Anyway, thank you for the request, lovely anons. I hope you like them!

dateables x fat GN!MC - NSFW MDNI

Warnings: discussion of weight and body image, suggestive content

Diavolo

He knows there's something causing you to have some low self esteem, but he isn't sure what it is at first. He observes that you just have this sort of discomfort sometimes. Eventually he just asks Lucifer because he can't figure it out on his own. Mostly because your body size seems completely irrelevant to him and he doesn't know enough about how such things are viewed in human society to understand why you might feel that way. Once he knows the truth, though, he has conflicting feelings. He wants nothing more than to reassure you that it isn't something you even need to worry about, but he's also outraged on your behalf. He's normally very fascinated by human world culture, but this makes him angry.

Diavolo will chat with all the brothers about this aspect of you. He wants to make sure that he isn't contributing to your insecurities at all. He makes sure your RAD uniform fits well and is designed so you're comfortable with how revealing or not revealing it is. He makes sure all the desk chairs at RAD can accommodate you. And he will act swiftly and decisively if he hears anything about rumors or students making fun of you.

If you're in a relationship with him, he will go out of his way to reassure you about your body. He wants you to know that he loves it, just as he loves everything else about you. There is nothing wrong with it at all, MC. He seems to understand that you need to hear him say it. That you need to hear him tell you that when he looks at you, all he sees is perfection. Considering how tall he is, you might actually be able to wear his clothes, too. But if it turns out they fit you just right or are really long but tight around the middle, he's going to think it's the cutest thing ever. He might deliberately buy clothes that are too big for him and then have you wear them so you'll feel like you're drowning in fabric.

But there is no doubt that he prefers when you aren't wearing any clothes at all. He won't let you keep the lights off during sex, he wants to see every part of you. Covers you completely in kisses, lingering over things he's heard you complain about. His favorite thing is to put your legs on his shoulders - he loves to see your whole body shaking beneath him, the way your legs clench against him. He's going to make sure you aren't capable of thinking at all, let alone thinking poorly about yourself.

Barbatos

He knows, of course. He knows exactly what you're dealing with. He can tell if you won't eat too many of his pastries. He'll make your favorites in an attempt to get you to at least take some home with you. He notices the way you move, how you avoid certain types of chairs, the usually over sized clothes that cover every inch, the way you avoid reflective surfaces. He notices all of it. He sees everything. He does his best to redirect you when he thinks you're struggling with something related to this, but he won't say anything to you directly. He's also really good at derailing other people who may say something they think is harmless, but isn't. Just easily changes the topic.

Barbatos takes it upon himself to make you stunning outfits for nearly every event. Any time you need some kind of fancy outfit, he is ready to make you something perfect. It fits you exactly right every time. Somehow, when you look in the mirror, you actually think you look good when you wear what he's made. How did he even manage to do that? He's pleased with himself for making you something so nice, but the way it makes you cry upsets him. He knows you don't often feel this way when you look at yourself. He knows that you cry because it's so rare for you to love the way you look. But it still fills him with a simmering rage that he somehow hides behind his usual smile.

In a relationship, he's going to touch you subtly all the time. Puts his hand on your back, circles his arm around your hip, any opportunity to touch you, he takes it. It's so gentle and nobody else notices, but you are hyper aware of the way his fingertips are always ghosting across you. When you're alone, he'll say everything you need to hear. He will tell you that he loves you for who you are in your entirety - your heart, your mind, your body, all of it. Because each of these things make you who you are and he loves you. Your body is perfect because it belongs to you, MC.

His favorite thing to do is wrap his tail around one of your thighs. Pushes one or both of the tips between them, sneaking it in where you might think it couldn't possibly fit. Considering how he can hide the entire tip of it between your thick legs when you're sitting with them together, he'll do it in public on purpose to rile you up. Then when he gets you alone, he apologizes so sweetly while he undresses you. Takes his time with you, kissing and touching, slowly burying himself in your heat until by the time he really gets going, you're both desperate and moaning.

Simeon

He doesn't notice unless you spend a decent amount of time with him and then he realizes that you're insecure about your body size. He doesn't know why and he doesn't feel like he can ask you directly, but he can definitely tell. So he takes it upon himself to shield you from anything that he thinks will make it worse. Deliberately tells you how good you look almost every day. You probably catch on because that's a little overkill, but it's sweet so you don't complain about it. Unless it comes up in conversation, he will not ask you about it. You can tell him yourself when you're ready.

As soon as Simeon understands exactly how you feel, you notice a subtle shift in the way he acts about it. There's a sort of underlying anger to the way he will defend you now, the way he will attempt to protect you from things he thinks are causing you to feel bad about yourself. He's angry about it, but he keeps it under wraps, hiding it behind his smile and serene personality. If you're prone to joking about your size as a defense mechanism, he will not like that at all. He frowns and tells you not to talk about yourself like that, even jokingly.

Being in a relationship with him is all of the above, but more intense. You find that he will actually scold you about being down on yourself, though he always follows it up with kisses. He's far more intense and unforgiving of anyone or anything else that causes you discomfort. You'll find he also just takes over feeding you. He's constantly bringing you meals and snacks that he's made. He's worried you won't eat properly. If you want him to, he will sit and eat with you if that's something that helps you feel better. All you have to do is ask him and he'll do whatever he can to make you more comfortable. Just leave it to him, MC.

He always seems perfectly calm and restrained until he gets you alone in his bed. He likes to dress you in lingerie - don't worry if you think it won't fit. He gets it custom made, but you'll never find out exactly where he goes for that. You highly suspect certain clothing-making demons may be involved, but you're far too embarrassed to ask. He just loves to see you only partially covered so he can run his fingertips along the edges of the cloth, teasing you for way too long before finally giving in and ravaging you. He can't stop telling you how perfect your body is when he's inside you.

Solomon

As a fellow human, he understands immediately why you might be self conscious about your larger body. Solomon has been through most of human history - he's seen all the trends. He knows how bad this particular one happens to be and how long it has persisted among humans. He watches you to see if you decided to try anything drastic - like using a spell or a potion to make yourself thin. He's ready to jump in and stop you if you so much as look it up. He doesn't want you to hurt yourself, but he also wants you to realize that you don't need to change.

Take the opportunity to tell him how you feel. Tell him about why it's so tempting to use magic to change yourself. How different your life could be if you did. He will listen, but he'll also talk you out of it. In the end, it's his expression that changes your mind. He makes some good points, of course, but the way he just looks so upset at the idea really makes you think you probably shouldn't do it.

Don't tell him that you're insecure in a relationship with him because you are asking for trouble. He'll know already of course, but if you say it, it's all over. He's going to say stuff all the time about your size and how perfect it is. He's going to constantly touch you and tease you and get you to do things you would normally never do. If you react dramatically to anything like that, he'll only laugh and do it even more. He likes to show you off, too. Takes you out places especially if he thinks the demon brothers will be there. Keeps an arm around your hips the entire time.

Similarly, if you say you're too fat to do something sexual with him, he's going to do it anyway. You might even say that you're too fat in general and then all bets are off. Saying anything like that to him is going to make him crazy, so you can be sure you will not be sleeping at all that night. Very deliberately chooses positions that you seem uncertain about due to your size. Spends a night just kissing and touching every single spot on your body. Reassures you constantly because even though he just wants to make you feel good, he knows how important it is for you to hear him say it, too. You're stunning, MC. Don't you know how much he loves you?

part one with the older brothers | part two with the younger brothers

masterlist | Thank you for reading!

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hvnnibvni · 6 days ago

Text

Together again II pt 3

Pairings: Jungkook/Reader

Genre: Mature themes. Romance. Angst. Arranged marriage AU. Childhood best friends to lovers AU.

Warnings: cheating, reader is a rope bunny (ALLEGEDLY), hard!dom JK, switch!reader, reader likes to be slutted out, drunken sex, unplanned pregnancy(this is in the end dw😅), cunnilingus, oral (both receiving), fighting (talk shit get hit) daddy!kink, praise!kink, dirty talk, spanking, hair pulling. Just all around nasty y’all.

Authors note: Hey! I’m sorry I’ve been gone for so long. Life hit me like a damn bullet trait and I fell into a spiral. I’m okay now and ready to get back into writing. I actually have another project I was working on before I fell off, so I’m looking forward to finishing that because it’s been a long time since it’s been requested. I HAVEN’T FORGOT ABOUT YOU GIRL!! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!! ILL MAKE IT A SERIES IF YOU WANT!! IM SO SORRY!! Okay but that’s all enjoy!

——————————————————————

“Hey what are you still doin up here? the guests are arriving.” You look back to see Jungkook and your brother Teahyung standing in the doorway to you bedroom.

“Oh hey, I'm considering auctioning off my old house in a couple of days.” Your brother looks at you confused. He doesn’t know the full story of why you left your previous relationship, but he gets the gist of it. No good friend, low down dirty ex-boyfriend. He gets it.

“Why? I mean, it's your house, right?” Your brother asks still lost. ‘Oh my sweet semi-slow big brother’ you thought as you looked back down at your computer. “Yes, but I don’t wanna go back to that house where they’ve probably fucked on all surfaces.” Your face scrunched in disgust.

“Ah I see, Kook what do you think?” He asks looking at his friend.

“I think you should send it now and auction it off tomorrow under your family name. Who wouldn’t want a house that used to belong to designer royalty?” He explains, nonchalantly. “ you sure there’s no other reason?” Tae pushs teasingly.

“Once we’re married my wife shouldn’t have anything in the world to worry about.. and on top of that I want all of her undivided attention.” He explains to his friend while making eye contact with you.

You were unsure whether to blush or cringe at his corny explanation, so you laughed it off. “Okay, I sent it out. If they’re not out by tomorrow they will be trespassing, and the police can deal with them,” you say with a wicked smile.

“wow, I never knew you could be so petty y/n,” your brother says jokingly.

“Aha petty my ass,” you say back rolling your eyes and smiling. “Anyway let’s go before mom sends Mrs. Sanchez up to get us,” you say leading them out of your room.

“Oh yeah if she has to come get us we won’t hear the end of it. I don’t like when she yells at us in Spanish I can’t understand her when she speaks so fast.” Taehyung responds pouting.

“Well I do and I’m not trying to hear it,” you say laughing.

Mrs. Sanchez is a friend of your late grandmother, she’d always watch you and Tae when your parents were away on business. They thought it’d be better to be kept by family rather than a nanny. She taught you both Spanish when you were little. She says it because she doesn’t like nosy people listening to her conversations.

You sigh. “Alright let’s go before we really do get in trouble,” you say as you shut your bedroom door.

————————————————————

“Ah! Y/n, your mother said you were back. How was the common world?” a distant cousin asks.

‘ whats her name again? Renee?’ Although it seemed like a dig, you paid it no mind.

“It was enjoyable to run my own business, acquire property, and build personal assets,” you reply honestly. ‘This girl is from the collateral family line. She doesn't know what it takes to be a part of the direct line. Let's not waste our time,’

Honestly, for a nepo baby, it'd be easy for you to acquire all of this through your family. Everyone was aware of it, so when you decided to leave, it shocked the entire extended family.

“ I mean, all of those things will be shared with your fiance when you guys get married no? So what was the point of “going out to get your own” when you really didn't need to? Haha just admit you were outside playing house and got way too over your head,” she laughs.

You laugh at her audacity “I'll admit that you admitted to sleeping with your psychology professor, Mr. Crenshaw was it? I'm sure your parents would love to know you got your degree by bouncing on a man twice your dads age, and I'm positive his wife would want to know how he spent his weekend evenings as well. Hm?” you bite back, with the sweetest smile.

“ Miss Y/N, your mother requires your presence.”

“It seems something more important has come up. Oh! I saw you over at the hors d'oeuvres table earlier making sweet love to the sweetish meatballs, maybe try the canapés next?” Before she could further embarrass herself, you excuse yourself from the uninteresting conversation.

As you make your way to your mom, you run into Jungkook who seems to also have been summoned by your mother. “Hello Y/N, you look even more beautiful than when I saw you just a few moments ago.”

“ please stop with the formalities, people will think we aren’t close,” you respond slightly cringing.

“I cannot,”

“And… why is that?” you ask confused

“We are yet to be married, therefore I shall speak formally to show my respect to my fiance.” Jungkook answers courteously.

“ Tight ass..” you mumble under your breath

As you said that Jungkook leans closer to you, so that only you could hear. “Don’t forget, this time next week you’ll be my wife. And there’ll be no need for formality, verbal or,” he pulls you closer, sliding his hand down your back.“physical,” he smirks and continues his way to your mother.

‘Oh sweet Jesus,’ you stand there momentarily before you also continue on your way.

“Y/N! My darling, You look wonderful!” Your mother is the most excited to see you.. as always. “Yeah- where's dad?” you as looking around.

“He took Jungkook to talk business, you know your father,” she says rolling her eyes.

“Anyway we need to discuss your wedding,” … ‘mm- Mother really never misses a beat does she’ you look over at your brother, who conveniently turns away sipping his drink.

“Mommy.. Can't that wait until everyone leaves?” you plead. “No, we have to get this done quickly. We need to work it into everyone's schedule. But you know, if you never would have left, we would've had more time. It's going to be a little uncomfortable for the next week, so just go with the flow. Okay, darling?” she's still holding a grudge for you leaving. Though you have to admit it's nice to be around family again.

“Anyway, I need you early tomorrow morning. I've composed a list of priorities that you and Jungkook need to go through. The date is already set, so you don't need to worry about that. I need you and Jungkook to meet your father and me in the courtyard no later than 5 am.” you look at her with wide eyes. “Mom, it's already 10:00 pm and I've been driving all day, and the party's still going. Can't we push it back to 8 am? That's not too bad, right?”

“Nope. Were on a tight schedule,”

“But-”

“No. Tu obéis s’il te plaît.”

“Dont scold me like a child,” you mumble under your breath.

“Quoi?”

“Nothing…. Okay but can I at least leave to go to be now then?” You ask. Honestly, you didn't even want to come out. You knew it would be just a bunch of wealthy, posh friends of your parents and extended family. They all got on your nerves, so why should you even entertain them? Well... you did want their engagement gifts, so it's a win-win. That and your mother and Mrs. Sanchez would tear into you after.

“I suppose,” your mother sighs. “But you have to say goodnight to you grandfather before you leave,” you sigh thinking she would've made some outlandish request. “And escort Jungkook to his quarters.” there it is… you spoke too soon.

You sigh and nod, giving her a kiss on the cheek before excusing yourself from your family. You make your way over to where your grandfather, father, and Jungkook are having a conversation. Jungkook looks bored but has a fake smile plastered on his face. You know that look all too well. You saw it all the time growing up. He always did it when he was getting lectured, which you overhear your father giving him a talk on what married life will be like.

“Dad you're scaring him, you want me to be left alone at the altar that bad?” your father chuckles

“I'm just letting him know what Auclair women are like-” “And what are we like” your mother pops up out of nowhere, scaring the fuck out of you and your father.

“Very kind, very mindful, very demure-” “That's what I thought,” your mother nods holding your father's arm. “Well, goodnight Grandpa, goodnight Mom and Dad. Jungkook and I are going to excuse ourselves for the evening.”

“goodnight darling, don't forget to show jungkook to his quarters.“ You nod grabbing jungkooks arm who looks more than happy to finally leave this event.

“I thought we'd never get to leave,” you sigh, plopping down on the couch in jungkooks room. “Tell me about it I had to listen to Aunt Magnolia talk about how if I don't marry soon I'll become ‘fruitless’….” Tae comes in after you and Jungkook “Please- what she should be talking about is her son's infidelity and how ‘fruitful” he is… with five other women who aren't his wife,” you all laugh. You missed talking shit about your family with your brother.

“Just tell her you're gay and she'll shut up,” Jungkook laughs “oooh yeah, then she'll splash holy water on me every time she sees me,” everyone nods in agreement, aunt magnolia so conservative Christian that she makes David Green seem liberal. “Anyway I'm gonna head to be. ‘Got a packed day tomorrow morning,” “we have to meet Mom and Dad in the courtyard at 5 am sharp,” you say turning to Junkook “Don't be late or it's our asses,” as you turn to leave Jungkook grabs you by the hand and kissed the back. “Goodnight beautiful.” “Y-yeah… dito. I mean- yeah. Goodnight ...”

Jungkook sighs not letting go of you hand. “What is it?” he doesn't say anything and just pulls you closer, slipping his free hand around your waist. “I thought I could hold back at least a week,” the way he's looking at you makes you feel like you're going to suffocate. Your stomach fills with butterflies as he pulls you closer “But the formalities you said-” “Fuck formalities,” he says smashing his lips into yours.

#bts ff #bts jk #btsedit #jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #kim taehyung #kim namjoon #bts fanfic #bts fluff

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nqueso-emergency · 2 months ago

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Alright Queso I’m dropping my own theory here. Feel free to delete it, I just need this all out before I self implode due to frustration.

I’m honestly so confused by the people being like “lol this is the last season!” due to pacing and Tim’s writing.

#1 ABC wouldn’t have spent the millions they did on the show for just one season. Peter and Angela were each getting over a million annually and the others were finally at the 100k per episode by contract negations during season 6. Even IF the Mouse House suddenly lost all of their brain cells and were like “yeah let’s pour an easy 20 mil [idk what the budget actually is but I’m assuming the salary alone is in the 10s of millions] into this production and just have it for one year”…. Why? Literally what good would that do for Disney/ABC? Like yeah, Disney doesn’t need to recoup losses, but still they want at least something close to being out of the red (unless 9-1-1 is sucking that much money out but I also don’t think they wouldn’t have taken it on if they were afraid of that). Also I highly doubt the actors and crew would have signed onto a year contract (circle back to previous point of “Disney wouldn’t have taken on a money sucking production”).

#2 as it’s been established, Tim writes by the seat of his pants. I think last season they had a rough game plan, then the strikes happened and it was too late to turn back when it came to drafts. By the time it came to filming, they couldn’t open, lead up to, and close the stories they wanted to tell in the 10 episodes. They didn’t know they would only have 10 episodes. They were writing what they wanted, then dealing with the timeline later. Fast forward a year and a half later, we’re left with them scrambling and everyone is now dealing with the effects of “okay here’s a resolution just trust us” (Ortiz v the Wilsons) as well as incredibly condensed stories (Gerard) so they can get to the stories they wanted to tell this season (Hot Shots, Eddie and Chris, Maddie and Chimney having another kid). Realistically, we’re NOW getting to the stories that should have been episodes 4 and 5. So yeah it’s rushed and probably will be for the better part of this season.

Regardless, my personal theory is, the writing is on the wall for Grey’s. The general public has been laughing about how Grey’s has jumped the shark 4 times over by now and everyone is kinda over it (both the show and Shonda). ABC knows this, but most importantly Disney knows this. But they can’t get rid of Grey’s until they have a show to take over for Grey’s. I think ABC got 9-1-1 to potentially take that power hour over. With how well Dr. Odyssey is doing and a potential spin off, in my very convoluted opinion, they’re looking at a way of building a new Shonda but instead it’s Ryan Murphy (even if he isn’t involved in the 9-1-1 sphere anymore the general public still knows the name Ryan Murphy).

I also am starting to question if Peter and Angela will leave (or have smaller roles) in the coming season. Between Bobby still dealing with Hot Shots, Athena hinting at retirement, and their house being built? I’m curious if they’ll pull a moment where the house is under construction, but it’s ~wherever Michael and David live~ so they get the happily ever after retirement and they’re setting up a season 9 where it’s “oh wow what will happen next!?”. Procedurals need a revolving cast and Peter and Angela have both mentioned moving on eventually. Why not now? Let them get the Disney money then leave (with guest appearances at reasonable times) opening a WHOLE LOT of potential things to t op about the 118.

Sorry for the novel. I’ve been thinking and have no one who will listen to my theories ❤️

Posting. But I'm not getting into this conversation 😅

#nquesu wanna block #911 abc #anonymous #911 show

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quitealotofsodapop · 7 months ago

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it has been awhile, but I've finally gotten around to doing another one of these! hope it will help with my writing funk.

[and is super guilty for not having told him back then. At the same time, Wukong is confused why Max seems so... ok with it suddenly???] + [He ultimately doesnt want to open up any old wounds Wukong has from the incident since he's been living with the outcome of that fight far longer than Mac has.] + [Why was Wukong protecting the monk that hurt him? Why was Wukong going on this Journey and not returning to his throne? Why did he hide the Stone Egg from the world?]

honestly? Wukong is probably more concerned by how okay with having been killed Mac is than he would be if he was still upset and causing problems because of it. I feel like Wukong would actually be very ok with talking/answering any questions about what happened, it'd be a hard conversation for sure, but he's grown to have enough emotional maturity to know it's a necessary one. the only reason he let Mac get away with pushing it off for so long to the point of it blowing up in there faces a little was because he was trying to let the other have time to process and work out how he felt before trying to hash things out together.

but perhaps, Wukong is also deflecting a little, worried that trying to talk about it would spur into an argument. neither of them are very good at listening to each other when they get riled up, and after how their fight went... he knows he did his best trying to talk Macaque down, but he always kinda feels like he should've tried harder. he just doesn't want things to get out of control again.

[Ao Lie and Wukong are quickly panicking over each other while their other bros are forcing them to rest after the Samadhi Fire Ritual.]

the Tripataka forces them both onto bedrest, but it's a combined effort of the uninjured pilgrims to keep them there considering how restless Wukong can be. between Wukong and Ao Lie? it's an endless cycle of "no, I'll get up and ask for water, you stay in bed" and "no, I'll grab the extra blankets, you need to rest".

[Wukong was in so much pain that he was convinced that he was going into labor, or that he even lost Yuebei as a result of joining in the Ritual.]

now I'm just picturing the others waking up to Wukong (who normally has a very high pain tolerance) loudly sobbing from how much it hurts and inconsolable because once the thought of having lost the egg even crossed his mind he became convinced that's what happened. he must have cried so hard, they'd have to call Guanyin to do a check-up while he's still sobbing to show him the egg is fine for him to even begin to calm down.

[Nezha makes note of hiding anything flammable whenever he visits the monkeys.]

it does seem Yuebei has a taste for the spicy-er things, huh. wonder if she'd like any of Redson's cooking?

[Pigsy: "Sure thing. Guess little monkeys aren't much different from little MKs." *gives Yuebei her nose back*]

heh- funny thing about that pigsy-

[Memory!Ao Lie, frowning: "Why are you so stubborn to admit that it wasn't your fault? I really truly never blamed you, or her." Wukong, crying: "Why were you so ok with it? Because of me, the Samadhi Fire it... hurt you."]

Wukong has had a real rough go with people ditching him after one mistake, real or even just perceived mistakes alike, and messing up the ritual and letting the fire hurt Ao Lie? a monumental fuck-up to almost anyone you ask. Wukong, rather unfortunately, has very good reason for believing Ao Lie would hate or resent him for it, anyone else would. he's grown used to it, apathetic, maybe even has grown to expect it.

as it is, this means Wukong has a very hard time understanding/grasping it when someone doesn't hate him over things like this.

[Ofc Nezha feels like garbage for treating Wukong's actions during the Ritual as a failing.]

worst part is, Wukong doesn't treat him like he was wrong. when it gets brought up he talks about matter-of-factly, nonchantly, like it was no big deal that he was in pain, at risk of sacrificing his unborn egg and basically everyone aside from the pilgrims was treating him like he was the ultimate disappointment.

this is in part due to Wukong's own guilt over the ritual, insecurities about being enough/strong enough, and because he, again, doesn't blame Ne Zha because he didn't know about the egg because Wukong never told him and therefore, it's actually on his shoulders .

(Wukong needs a therapist)

[The Spider Gang has nightmares of Guanyin coming to beat the rest of them up like she's a Jojo stand.]

they're so terrified that they basically start praying to Guanyin- more so begging to be left alone, but still.

[To hear that Wukong has named her his little "Moon Comet Star" just makes him cry harder, especially with how casually Wukong names her.] + [But I bet Wukong is just so happy that he tells everyone Yuebei's name long before that time.]

I think Wukong probably had a lot of trouble coming up with names before Yuebei was born, nothing just ever seemed right! he honestly tried not to think about why the only ones that ever seemed to be good candidates were space/moon related names. but then Macaque came back. he stopped denying it at that point, and just went all for it. no matter how things with Mac end up going, Wukong probably already had the name chosen by the time he came back from looking for the map. And yeah, Macaque loves the idea that this was always Wukong's plan, and Wukong being just as happy about the name is also just so cute to him!

[It's PIF anf DBK's fave baby photo of Yuebei - besides the one where she tried eating Red Son's hair.]

oooooo what do you think would be everyone else's fav baby photos of Yuebei?

[and when he gets to Camel Ridge, he pauses before looking towards Wukong for confirmation. At Wukong's excited nod, Macaque grins evily.] + [Macaque also deliberately exaggerates the voices of their allies like PIF and DBK so Yuebei doesn't accidentally associate their voices with the muddy past shown in the book.]

let's be real, Peng's voice is the most bastardized.

love the fact that Macaque doesn't even really have to ask, Wukong already knows what he's planning and is living for it. Wukong enjoys the retelling almost as much as Yuebei does, if only for Macaque's dramatics. and doing his best to change her perception of their current allies? a very appreciated effort.

[Azure is clueless and isn't sure if monkey cubs work like lion cubs or not. Yellow Tusk has the sense to ask the remaining servants for help with tending to the infant - a group of seven brave orchard maidens stepped forward to run the baby a bath and prepare her a meal. Yellow Tusk is sure that he recognises them.]

so long pining for a monkey and he has no clue how they work or how to care for one. at least Yellowtusk is at least a little bit sensible. and ah! the peach orchard maidens Wukong was friends with! imagine if this was their first proper intro to Yuebei. they've never met but they know this is their old friends child so the seven will do anything for her, take on as many responsibilities as it takes to keep Yuebei out of Azure's claws as long as they can.

they don't like any of the brotherhood, but tusk at least seems remorseful enough to consider him safe enough to help bathe the little infant- with supervision of course. Yuebei latching to his trunk was probably as funny to them (at Yellow tusk's expense) as it was heartbreaking because they could probably recognize the behavior for what it was due to their time spent with the Monkey King.

at least Yuebei's comes out of it thinking/feeling very positively about peach maidens.

[So when the elephant gently put Yuebei in the warm bathwater and offered her mashed fruit, she instinctively clasped around his trunk like it was the arm of her parents, making sad hooing sounds as she sucked on her fingers. Yellow Tusk felt his heart break at the sight. He simply cannot fathom harming her in any sense of the word.]

oh no, Yuebei's sucking her finger, means she's missing her mama. imagine if after her rescue Wukong/macaque notice she's developed a small oral fixation from the trauma of her kidnapping.

I wonder if Yellow Tusk ever looks down at this tiny monkey and has an epiphany about how he treated Monkey King and Macaque, or the treatment of them he was at least complacent in. those two were never truly infants sure, but they were young minds, perhaps the thought had never crossed his mind because they're looks were deceiving when it came to age. how young had they truly been? what age were the children the brotherhood sent to war and martyred?

perhaps it doesn't matter anymore, the chance at redemption long forgotten, but at least he knows i his heart of hearts he will not make the mistake again. even if it means betraying those he's held dear for so long...

[Mac would make a show of picking up his baby girl and kissing her all over while commenting in baby-talk; "Did you have fun with the birdy and kitty, moonlight? Yeah? Do you want Bama to take something to remember your little play date?"]

the fact that Macaque baby-talks to the obvious victor only makes Peng's humiliation worse. Imagine getting turned into ground beef by an infant and her dad comes in and makes it all the more real that you were beaten by a less-than-a-year-old baby by outright baby talking her in front of you. like you always were and always would be nothing but literal child's play to deal with that you weren't even deserving of having your defeat be treated seriously, no. your opponent gets baby talk congratulations.

Macaque will forever tell the story of Peng's defeat when having proud dad bragging moments.

[Macaque has one of the feathers preserved as a bookmark. It brings him great joy.]

he takes a couple feathers for himself, makes a few different things out of them, like a quill. but he also made one or two for other people like Wukong and of course Yuebei's toy. they all bring him (and the receivers of the gifts) great joy.

prev.

yesyesyes some SlowBoiled thoughts! Also btw I've shortened what parts I'm replying to for brevity.

[honestly? Wukong is probably more concerned by how okay with having been killed Mac is than he would be if he was still upset and causing problems because of it...] + [but perhaps, Wukong is also deflecting a little, worried that trying to talk about it would spur into an argument... ...he just doesn't want things to get out of control again.]

YES

A big reason for their fight just as S4 starts is the fact they're avoiding some pretty big glaring questions/concerns to "avoid conflict", only to hurt themselves and each other more by deflecting. Sometime avoiding confrontation is more harmful than tackling your demons head-on and de-escalating any anger that it brings up as it comes. Wukong would be ok answering any questions Mac needed to be answered, but the real hard part is getting both monkeys in a space where they can vent it out a bit without one or both trying to portal away from an escalating conversation.

A good marriage counsellor needs to take on Wukong and Macaque's case and let the monkeys honestly Talk for a while without interruption.

Yue Lao, god of marriage & true love: "Diiiid someone call for marriage help?" :3

[the Tripataka forces them both onto bedrest, but it's a combined effort of the uninjured pilgrims to keep them there considering how restless Wukong can be. between Wukong and Ao Lie? it's an endless cycle of "no, I'll get up and ask for water, you stay in bed" and "no, I'll grab the extra blankets, you need to rest".] +[now I'm just picturing the others waking up to Wukong (who normally has a very high pain tolerance) loudly sobbing... ...he must have cried so hard, they'd have to call Guanyin to do a check-up while he's still sobbing to show him the egg is fine for him to even begin to calm down.]

Aww. It's very sweet but also kinda sad to think about. Eventually Ao Lie and Wukong are both too exhausted from their escape attempts, so the rest of the Pilgrims tap in to tend to them.

And the miscarriage scare!! PIF had opened up to Wukong in the last few weeks about how she and Bull had suffered tragic losses before Red came into the world - and when Wukong feels that terrible pain in his body, he immediately breaks down at the thought of suffering the same loss. Guanyin has to check in since Wukong won't stop hyperventilating and crying at the idea that he lost Yuebei. The goddess thankfully is able to confirm that the soul within the egg was alive and well, just very startled by the surge of power. Wukong still cries, now from relief.

Sadly, if the Samadhi ritual occurred after Macaque's death, Wukong likely saw the Egg as the final reminder of his former-mate. Yuebei is his little moonlight, even if her creation was not ideal.

[it does seem Yuebei has a taste for the spicy-er things, huh. wonder if she'd like any of Redson's cooking?]

Now I'm thinking of a scene where post-S3/4, Red Son is messing around in the kitchen with MK and Mei while they're babysitting Yuebei. Cue the baby grabbing a handful of spicy bbq sauce Red Son has been preparing and shove it in her mouth like it's nothing. All three are speechless with terror as Yuebei doesn't appear to be bothered in the slightest. Then she tries going for more!

Red Son quickly moves his sauce pot away and wonders aloud if he's skipped an ingredient. MK takes a spoonful, and with his face sweating profusely wheezes "Nope. That's Australian-level."

Yuebei whines for some more, and all three now understand why she keeps trying to eat firey things. DBK laughes proudly when he's told about it later on - nothing less from his dear godcalf!

[heh- funny thing about that pigsy-]

Lets just say a lot about MK's upbringing makes more sense after Pigsy realises that his son is a monkey demon XD

[Wukong has had a real rough go with people ditching him after one mistake, real or even just perceived mistakes alike... ...this means Wukong has a very hard time understanding/grasping it when someone doesn't hate him over things like this.]

THIS is why Ao Lie and the Samadhi Fire arc are so important to Wukong's character. He has such trouble understanding that sometimes people who care won't hold your mistakes real or perceived against you. Ao Lie likely told Wukong to his face multiple times that he didn't care that Wukong "screwed up", he was just glad that Wukong, the Egg, and Tripitaka were alive and well after all things considered.

[worst part is, Wukong doesn't treat him like he was wrong... ....(Wukong needs a therapist)]

The fact that Wukong doesn't mind that Nezha treated his failure that way all those years ago, makes Nezha even more concerned in the modern day!

yes yes he does.

[they're so terrified that they basically start praying to Guanyin- more so begging to be left alone, but still.]

Guanyin can only grant the Spider Gang a swift end and perhaps a revival after S3. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[I think Wukong probably had a lot of trouble coming up with names before Yuebei was born,...]

Wukong is bad at naming things I feel. He did call himself "Grimpil Sun" when he pretended to be a different monkey in the Gold-Silver Twins chapter. Even after over a thousand years of prep, he's still undecided what he'd should call his Egg once they arrive.

He's called Yuebei his "little moonlight", his "star", and his "comet" since long before he finally decided on her name. And when Macaque came back into his life and confirmed that he wanted both of them to be safe? His little "Moon Comet Star" just made sense - she indirectly brought his Moonlight back to him.

[oooooo what do you think would be everyone else's fav baby photos of Yuebei?]

hehehe!

For Wukong it's any photo of Yuebei. Look at his daughter! She's here! She's so perfect! Has one of those giant wallets full of photos of her.

Macaque's favorite is one Mei snapped of Yuebei just after the baby had destroyed Peng and Azure - the cub's eyes gleaming with delight at seeing her Bama again, her mouth full of golden feathers. He also treasures a photo he took of Wukong just after Yuebei's egg was born - his Peaches smiling contentedly as he curls around the egg.

MK's is when Yuebei saw him put away the Staff, and she tried looking inside his ear for it.

Mei is taking so many photos all the time, so it's hard for her to have faves. One of her faves though is a pair of photos where Yuebei is completely calm and about to fall asleep, and then her eyes are glowing with eye-lasers cus a bang in the kitchen scared her. Mei uses it as a reaction meme.

For Pigsy its a photo of Yuebei attempting to eat her first mooncake - the pastry was bigger than her whole head. Chang'e took the photo and just knew Pigsy would love it.

Tang's is the one of MK holding Yuebei for the first time, tears and snot running down the older monkey-boy's face while Yuebei looks up at him curiously. Tang thinks it's hilarious.

Sandy's fave is Yuebei taking a curious sip of tea from her mama's cup, and frowning hard when she realised it wasn't as nice as milk. Also one where Yuebei and Mo got distracted by the same cat toy - seems that the baby girl likes attacking things with feathers.

PIF and DBK's faves are well known ofc. Red Son would claim that he doesn't have any, but secretly its one where the baby monkey is playing peekaboo with DBK. It just really heart-warming to see his father interact with Yuebei after missing out on a lot of Red's childhood. Red looks at the photo and wonders if his father ever tried such games on him. (He did. Baby Red Son exploded)

Jiuweihuli and the twins love any photo Wukong shares with them. The old Vixen's favourite is where Macaque managed to get Yuebei into an elaborate baby costume (lots of bribery with mashed peaches was involved) and the baby is just happily sticking her tongue out at the camera.

It takes Bai He a while to warm up to Yuebei all the way, but she likes the photo of Yuebei when she first met Mo. The cat was very cautious and the baby monkey was just fascinated.

The gods themselves get rare glimpses of Sun Wukong's baby. Nezha's fave is a short video of Yuebei's first ever swimming lesson - decked out in all the little floaties as she doggie-paddled in the kiddie pool, Wukong smiling and holding his arms out for her while Macaque filmed. Nezha loves it not only for it's content, but for how happy Wukong finally is after so long. He blesses Yuebei many times over for good fortune and safety.

[let's be real, Peng's voice is the most bastardized. love the fact that Macaque doesn't even really have to ask, Wukong already knows what he's planning and is living for it. Wukong enjoys the retelling almost as much as Yuebei does, if only for Macaque's dramatics. and doing his best to change her perception of their current allies? a very appreciated effort.]

Macaque turns Peng's voice into a harsh nasally sound with random squawks thrown in like a cartoon parrot.

Wukong and Macaque have a near psychic connection as a couple once they start cohabitating again (and deal with emotional stuff). Wukong cannot deny his Plums the chance to make fun of their former brothers. Wukong even gets in on it, mimicking his own younger self and a some of the Pilgrims in a silly voice. Yuebei loves story time.

[so long pining for a monkey and he has no clue how they work or how to care for one. at least Yellowtusk is at least a little bit sensible... ...at least Yuebei's comes out of it thinking/feeling very positively about peach maidens.]

Azure is an orange male cat at his core - he's standing there, holding Yuebei by her diaper and wondering "What now?" while Peng covers their beak. Yellowtusk atleast has the wisdom to ask around the palace for help when Yuebei starts getting fussy. And since Peng confirms that the Memory Scroll "took the cupbearers as well" in the special, the Orchard Maidens are running themselves ragged to ensure that the invaders are content, and by proxy Yuebei safe. Not many are aware of their familial connection to the Emperor on first glance, so they quickly disguise themselves as "just" servants that escaped the Scroll.

So when Yellowtusk approaches almost shyly for help to feed and clean the baby hostage, the girls knew they made the right choice to stay. The seven maidens had taken one look at the baby monkey, saw the power she wielded, and just knew she was their dear didi's baby. '

The Maidens provide a character statement for Yellowtusk once everything is said and done. Afterall, the elephant allowed his trunk to be nearly crushed if it meant the baby girl had comfort.

Oh oh! Imagine in the aftermath of S4, Wukong manages to ask Yellowtusk who cared for Yuebei while she was hostage?

Yellowtusk, in cuffs about to be taken away: "I tried my best, but without the aid of the seven Orchard Maidens I likely wouldn't have fared much better than my brothers." Wukong: "Orchard Maidens?" Seven distinct voices: "Didi!" Wukong turns to see the seven snake-cat-like celestials running towards him, their appearances unkempt from worry. They carefully check him and Yuebei over. Orchard Maidens: "Oh thank buddha you're ok!" "We were so worried!" "After what happened to baba we..." "We couldn't bare to leave her alone with them!" Wukong, touched: "You all stayed behind, knowing that you shared the halls with the lion that took your father away, just to make sure my baby was ok?" Orchard Maidens: "Of course!" "You're a fellow attendant!" "Aiyi would have broken her vow of pacifism if either of you were truly hurt!" "We knew she was yours just from the way she... shot lasers out her eyes." Wukong, tearing up: "Oh girls..." Wukong & the Maidens: (*all group hug, careful to give Yuebei some space*)

Yuebei considers the Maidens akin to aunties since they care for her so well and clearly have a good relationship with her mama. This indirectly leads to the mourning Xiwangmu to see the baby girl as a surrogate granddaughter once they are properlly introduced. Yuebei recognises something in the Queen Mother's heart is hurt and wants to hug and kiss it better. Xiwangmu in turn can only reminice on the times she and her dear Jade held their own cubs in their arms, the dawn of their empire.

[oh no, Yuebei's sucking her finger, means she's missing her mama... ... he knows i his heart of hearts he will not make the mistake again. even if it means betraying those he's held dear for so long...]

Yesss. Baby monkey who are separate from their mothers develop oral fixations/self-soothing behaviors, which is still seen if they successfully gain a foster mom/is returned. It's a learned habit. Now I'm imagining Yuebei becoming super attached to her pacifer long after she's weaned, just because its such a source of comfort for her. Wukong and Macaque had to ask around a bit to try and figure out how to wean Yuebei off the pacifer once her milk teeth started growing in.

Yellowtusk's redemption is very internal, but it reflects heavily in his actions. After the days of caring for Yuebei, and coming to realise how they as a Brotherhood treated their monkey brethern, Yellowtusk starts on the path of reversing the damage caused by the coup. Even if the Heavens never forgive him, he is ultimately glad that his brothers and their families are safe - a far greater reward than what Azure's plans brought him.

Note; in situations where the Brotherhood survive/are captured after S4 - I feel like the Buddha pulls a Jttw on them and suddenly theres three circlets on their heads for the next few millennium. >:)

[the fact that Macaque baby-talks to the obvious victor only makes Peng's humiliation worse... Macaque will forever tell the story of Peng's defeat when having proud dad bragging moments.] +[he takes a couple feathers for himself, makes a few different things out of them, like a quill. but he also made one or two for other people like Wukong and of course Yuebei's toy. they all bring him (and the receivers of the gifts) great joy.]

HAHA! XD

Peng ain't ever going to live down being turned into chicken paste by a baby monkey. A bunch of celestial soldiers and servants saw how the Six Eared Macaque waltzed in, picked up the baby monkey, and cooed at her while Peng lay broken upon the floor. Yuebei isn't some disguised immortal or god, she's a baby. One that quickly falls asleep in her parents arms once they're all reunited.

Macaque is so keeping a few of Peng's feathers as trophies. The quill idea is amazing - he'd sign everything with it. Wukong gets a cute broach made with one of the golden feathers intertwined, and thinks its beautiful (if a little arrogant but hey he loves trophies). Yuebei has a toy thats 80% feathers she's ripped from Peng, and 20% string and cloth that looks like a kitten toy - it's her fave thing besides her plush skeleton toy. Macaque sends Xiwangmu a few feather quills along with a letter of condolence - it brings her some comfort (as does the lion hide she drapes on her shoulder).

tysm for asking in! Its ok to take breaks from writing if we need it. I'm just glad that we can shoot ideas back and forth.

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missezramay · 2 years ago

Text

ted lasso, post-finale thoughts.

I went into the finale thinking yeah, if the writing serves, I can accept any outcome even if it's not exactly what I want. Instead, I was hit with a plethora of mixed emotions I didn't expect to have. Confusion, anger, hurt, annoyance, small bursts of joy in between, and just deep sadness. Almost 20 hours later and I'm still incredibly dissatisfied and processing. For the most part, finales should provide a feeling of celebration and relief. I... don't feel any of that.

I'm just really trying to pinpoint why I'm so sad.

Of course everything inevitably has to come to an end. Of course Ted was always going to reunite with his kid. Of course it's not about winning or losing. Of course Tedbecca can remain platonic if that was always the plan. Of course that's the way life goes, but...

For a show (and this season particularly) that constantly encouraged us to 'believe' and 'hope' in the idea that 'everything will work out', all those 75 minutes did was take me on an unsettling, emotional journey for no concrete reason other than to mess with the audience (the opening scene was just adding salt in the Tedbecca wound I've had since S2). Because everything in a macro sense, "worked out". But the WAY it "worked out" does not sit well with me?? And it's supposed to? For a lot of people (on Reddit/Facebook, lol), it was enough?? Richmond not technically winning and Ted leaving like that without so much as a tear? What am I missing??

When I tell you I'm trying to embrace the good parts, I'm really trying. Yes to KBPR & the women's team, Yes to Colin kissing his fella, Yes to Rebecca & Mae & the guys owning the club, Yes to Roy becoming Manager.

So... why am I still so upset? Hmm, let's see.

The boys' musical number? The cutest. Ted didn't think so.

Nate's apology? Heartbreaking. Ted didn't bat an eyelash.

Rebecca begging twice for Ted to stay? Ted, absolute silence.

Beard staying/getting married in London to his toxic gf? Comic relief, haha, fine. Except Ted wasn't there as Best Man.

Don't even get me started on the huge disservice to the Roy/Keeley/Jamie triangle.

Now listen, I get that he misses Henry & Henry misses his dad. I'm not that cold. A father/son's love is important. It was always the catalyst for this show; for him to work on himself so he can be a better father unlike the one he grew up with. That's fine.

But on this particular week. His last week with his Richmond family. There was NO sense of him being sad to leave them. He can be sad about missing Henry but he can ALSO be sad about leaving. No, he just completely checked out. He let everyone pour out their hearts (Hannah's getting her third Emmy, mark my words) to him, and he just stone-faced the entire time.

THIS DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE TO ME.

The argument is that he was internally processing, he was overwhelmed, he was trying to distance himself so it would hurt less. Fair points, okay. But this is a television show, moreover, A FINALE. TV characters, while relatable, are heightened versions of ourselves, there so we can better process our emotions and learn to handle things better in our real lives. Ted deserved MORE dialogue and displaying MORE emotion than whatever this was.

We're never going to see him again. We're over here crying along with Rebecca, Nate & Beard, but he didn't sob once. Even though he spent three years building a family with them. I even thought, hey at least he left his legacy with Trent's book but newsflash, he wanted his name taken off that too! Complete erasure.

I just feel so robbed of better moments. Like there were nice moments here and there. But they could've been BETTER. Honestly, Nate & Rebecca's breakdowns were close to perfection, so much love there. But the lack of dialogue and Ted not reciprocating? Broke ME.

I just cannot. understand. this. choice.

Massive sigh. I'm just truly baffled by the way everything wrapped up and not getting the satisfied feeling that one half of the viewership got. Maybe I'm in the minority, but that means something. It carries weight. Also, for a "three-season arc" that was planned well in advance, why all the rewrites and parallels and fakeouts... it's just cruel. But as the theme says (and maybe this was a warning all along), yeah, I guess this might well be it.

This show has given us so much and the last season flailed for the most part. I don't want to disrespect the show by being negative and cynical (looks like I failed!!) or cast blame on anyone in particular. The cast/crew are amazing people and I'll be grateful for being a part of the journey but I'm just so sad and this feeling sucks and I will never get over it.

Going to miss them. x

#ted lasso #spoilers #thoughts #finale #text post #tedbecca #roykeeley #jason sudeikis #hannah waddingham

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fantasy-anatomy-analyst · 5 months ago

Note

Hello! I wanted to start off by saying thank you for your digitigrade humanoid references, they've been super helpful for drawing my sheep-satyr oc!

I was wondering though, do you have any resources for writing nonhuman creatures? Specifically when referencing the nonhuman aspects of them. For example I have this sentence that goes:

"I jumped to my hooves."

I don't have any frame of reference for this :/ so when I'm writing my oc talking about what she does with the sheep half of her body it sounds kind of off.

I looked on Youtube and online and just saw "Do some world building and give your nonhuman characters human traits," which isn't what I'm looking for.

Kindest Regards-

oh I am doing so much of this in my own writing. I think the trickiest part for me is that I'm trying to also add in the detail that most of the people species don't smile the way humans do, with exposed teeth and a wide mouth being more of a fear/threat response rather than a happy expression. so I keep having to force myself to describe happy expressions in different ways! this is quite challenging, for obvious reasons lol.

but beyond that, honestly I like to just focus on using their non-human body parts to help enhance their body language. my porcine orcs and gnomes wiggle their snouts. anyone with large ears can move them as an expressive body part. tails do all sorts of things!

I think using the phrase "I jumped to my hooves" works just fine! it shows the reader that your character has hooves. The hardest part of course is figuring out how to introduce the character's appearance as early as possible to avoid too much confusion. Looking at my own writing, opening on a scene of a gnomish character, I didn't mention her ears until a few paragraphs in, and her hooves didn't get mentioned until several paragraphs after that. I'm still trying to scan through and find where I introduce her snout lol. it's really hard! and sometimes just using illustrations is unfortunately not possible.

But I think as long as you remember to mention different body parts when they're relevant and using them in the general body language, you'll be just fine. A few things I've been doing with this gnomish character include:

mentioning that she catches a pebble between her cloven toes

using her snout as an expressive body part

writing scenes where she needs to have her hooves trimmed because they grow perpetually

writing scenes where she files down her tusks, because she's also a quarter orc and has some recessive genes that cause tusk growth in amab gnomes, so filing her tusks is one part of how I explore her relationship with her body and gender as a trans woman

I also have elves with long monkey-like tails, though I give them tail expression more similar to cats. Teeth can also be an important expressive body part, when applicable! baring sharp canines or moving one's head and mouth in a way that puts a large pair of tusks on full display is a great way to show things like fear, intimidation, or anger.

you can also study the body language of whatever animal you're using for reference, like sheep, and apply those details to the way you describe your character!

here is an article about sheep behaviors for reference!

and a few quotes with non-human body language from my own rough draft:

“K’arik is the one I’m worried for, not myself,” Morianon murmured, flicking his wings nervously. Evarin nodded, wrapping her arm around her husband’s waist. “I’m worried for him too.” They walked in silence, gravel and bark chips crunching under their feet as they made their way up the road. Evarin spread her hoofed toes with every step, willing a stone to catch between them. A cold pebble lodged itself in the crease between her toes just as they turned up the path to her parents’ door.

The stranger bent low, pushing their enormous three-toed feet over the threshold, ducking their head and reaching forward to pull themself inside. “What’s going on?” He-esh squinted and frowned. “Elkha, tell me what’s going on.” He tapped Th’elir’s arm, but she too had been caught by surprise and only mumbled as she tried to explain. Evarin stepped back towards K’arik, eyes wide. She glanced at her mother and saw her own shocked expression mirrored right back. As the stranger grunted and half-crawled through the low door, she saw her father escape the crowd and hurry to join her. “Can you believe—“ he whispered, but Tawei shushed him. The stranger’s body blocked the whole door as they finally fit themself through it and stood up. Even inside, they had to bend their neck to avoid the rafters, towering over the tallest orcs in the room. Four hooved feet, holding a body so heavy they sunk into the packed dirt floor. Legs as tall as a gnome. They wore layers of woven cloth, all green and brown and cedar red in beautiful leafy patterns, draped over their uncanny body that seemed to have two sets of ribs. Their arms were just skinnier versions of their forelegs, Evarin noticed. She could barely see their face in the shadows by the rafters. Morianon could see them better, perched above everyone else. His feathers shivered as the stranger noticed him, catching and holding his gaze. Their mouth was tense, their long ears laid flat against their head. Morianon glanced away and found Evarin’s eyes, shaking his head in disbelief. “Forgive me,” the stranger said, bringing the murmur of the crowd to a dead hush, “for not announcing my arrival ahead of time.” They walked carefully forward, every step remarkably delicate for someone so massive. “I came to deliver my herd’s respects to you, He-esh.” “Oh? Ah, no, I do know you,” He-esh sat up with Th’elir’s help, clearing his throat. “Or perhaps this is an old man’s dying dream. Are you a spirit?” he laughed, “I never thought I’d live to see a centaur enter my village. I suppose it would have to happen on the last day of my life, wouldn’t it?” He smiled up at the centaur and welcomed them forward with an open hand.

Despite the difficulty, Kouto looked oddly chipper for an early morning and sat down in a hurry, tail curling playfully.

“I remember when he was a kid,” Nanji said, shaking his head, “he had a lot of potential. Shame to see him grow up into such a stubborn and angry fellow.” He passed the tray to Jen who set it on the central table. “I hate to blame anyone but him for his change of heart, but we all know it happened after he got married and moved to that other clan up north.” “He was very annoyed that He-esh wanted to die by song instead of the usual orcish tradition,” Mori said, “Kept giving Evarin nasty looks.” He ruffled his feathers and sat a little closer to his wife. “I was too nervous to pay him any mind,” Evarin assured him. Ikar’s irritated gaze had added to the nervousness, she admitted to herself, but it had been among the least of her worries.

Leaving the bedroom, Evarin was momentarily startled by the looming figure of Ikar at the hearth. She had been in such a hurry, she hadn’t noticed him on her way in. He gave her a sideways glance, lightly swirling the cup in his hand. “At’ali’s granddaughter, aren’t you?” he muttered. “That’s right.” Evarin tensed up defensively. Ikar humphed. “You look nothing like as’el. Must take after your father’s side more.” He sipped his drink and went quiet, turning away from her. Evarin’s snout wrinkled and grew hot, but she left the house without another word, shaking off his comment and breathing deep in the fresh air.

#worldbuilding #writing advice #non human body language

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thesharktanksdriver · 1 year ago

Text

The wanderers tale of Chang’e and Houyi (romantic)

This isn’t canon to these part 1 and part 2

This is a what if scenario, and I might write some more for different characters. None for the Greek pantheon tho for obvious reasons

This was a lot of fun to write, sorry if Qin is out of character but he is fucking whipped in love. Man is literally on his knees

tried adding some historical stuff in this but i'm not the most knowledgable on Chinese history or myth so please take it with grain of salt

For much of his life the concept of love is foreign to Qin let alone that of the romantic kind

Sure, he saw displays of it in small ways on the streets

A couple linking hands or exchanging kisses behind the cover of fans in the midnight hour

But he never thought he’d experience it

For he was hated by everyone including himself for the sins of of his family

For the deaths they caused that now transferred to him by the blood in his veins

It is cruel but for the longest time he accepted he’d never be given love of any kind until Chun Yan showed him he was worthy of it

It is through her he learns familial love

Not romantic love of any sorts but a type of love that leads him to discover and be curious of the other forms of love later on in his life

When he becomes empowered he explores this concept as times goes on

Lust and desire

But never actual connection

Not the love he’d hear in tales or see between young lovers

No, He’d yet to still experience that actual form of romantic connection formed through genuine intimacy

But for awhile he was fine with that

Perhaps even grateful he had not been subjected to such an intense feeling

Something that could bring down entire empires and could shatter men’s spirits like sticks to a boot

And for a long time it remains that way

Until the 3rd year of your friendship with him as his personal historian

It’s hardly something he notices at first

Just the small feeling of wanting to be near you more often than he already was

It was strange but be brushed it off for a long while

Perhaps it was him just missing your presence due to the two faced courtesans he had to deal with on a daily basis

No one was quite as truthful or real as you were

You never had stray intentions with him

Just treating him as a real person

Still respectful but not overly so

It’s a slow process for him

One built on denial and confusion as he tries in his mind to write off his behaviour

He’d never felt this type of love before

It’s foreign and slightly scary to him for several reasons

One of which is cause he’s afraid of loss

The death of Chun Yun had…hurt him a lot

Left himself a shattered visage to be rebuilt into a strong facade

For not only himself but also his people

It is something done due to his duty

A responsibility placed on his shoulders

He takes being a king seriously but in the process he loses a bit of himself

With you though he makes the choice to spend time with you

Listen

Indulge

Talk

When he’s with you warmth blossoms in his chest like a flower in full bloom

Petals opening to reveal something beautiful yet tender

It feels…nice

He feels for once vulnerable

And it’s nice yet scary

But with time he eases into it

Gently placing his heart in your hands

It beats like a drum in your presence much to his pride

But at the same time. He enjoys the sensation

The fact that you make him feel so flustered

It’s honestly amazing that such small acts such as your smile can make the emperor feel light on his feet

He once laughed at the tall tales of men foolishly in love

Now he is that fool

The ones who’d offer the moon and hang the stars in their beloveds name

Chun Yun once talked of love once, hoping he’d one day experience that beautiful emotion

He now understood as to why she spoke so highly of it

But as he finally admits to himself that he’s fallen deeply head first into this endless void

You reveal you must leave soon

Unknown to you his heart cracks

In the months ticking down to your departure he spends as much time with you as he can

He feels now that he’d taken your presence for granted

A luxury that he assumed would stay despite knowing you were a free bird

One who would not stay east forever and eventually travel somewhere else

He feels desperate though

Grasping at strings to reach out and convince you to stay

Pleading with every interaction for you stay

To please stay

in time he realizes it’s a fruitless endeavour

Yet he tries anyways

Because that’s the only thing he can do

Yet he can’t admit his feelings

Especially now that your leaving

Maybe confessing would get you to stay but it feels cruel, a way to guilt you into become a caged bird

Love should not be bound in shackles or a gilded cage

It is free

And he would never take that away from you

So he tries to convince you with deals

With time dwindling down he tries to inch closer

A hand almost touching your own

Eyes staring with lidded looks beneath their gaze

It’s not direct, perhaps the only time the emperor isn’t

He feels himself clam up at the last minute

It’s unbefitting of him but it’s Ying Zheng peaking through the cracks and taking the reigns of his heart

The young boy from the streets who only wanted love

Who’s scared of ruining what’s more than enough for that fragile heart

It’s pathetic that he’s battling with himself over this

A back and forth between two voices in his mind of his head and heart

Yet it endures as the days whittle down

During this time he becomes interested in tales of love

Specifically that of Houyi and Chang’e

A love bound for tragedy

A simple mortal man in love with someone divine

Requited yet torn apart

Yet despite it all he still loves her and still still mourns and waits

In some sense he hopes for something like this

But for now he resonates with the story

So much so he decided to incorporate the story into a parting gift for you

A bracket

One that is beautifully crafted with his finest stones

Intricately crafted to last

One that is made to pair with his own

It’s a sign that you will forever be the emperors closest friend

But also with the double meaning of a reference to Chang’e

To him you are his Chang’e, his love who shall never age and has to leave despite how much he pleads

And he is Houyi, who can only watch and do nothing but shed tears as you go

As you leave on your stead and ponders if this was the worst pain imaginable

Having you gone is a change of pace that leaves him uneven

There are no more talks of travel

Of warrior’s and battles from far off lands

A new courtesan takes your place but it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth

He wonders if your alright

If your ok

You once talked of a loneliness of being immortal

Seeing those you loved dear die from the passage of time

It’s natural yet it hurts

The loss of Chun Yun was one of the worst pains in his life, but knowing you’d always outlive those you’d grown close to must be hell

He doesn’t want to put you though than once more if he can do something to stop it

He anything but a simple man

And he begins trying to at least look for a solution

It is a neigh impossible task but he tries

And tries

And years tick onwards

When he lays awaken in silk sheets alone at night he stares at the moon

Taking another mercury pill as he stares at the silvers rays of light

A part of him knows that the pills aren’t his ticket to immortality

But he pushes himself to try anyways

Cause he is so desperate to become immortal for you

So he can be by your side without fear of hurting you in the end by dying

If it came down to it he’d leave everything he’s built till now for it

His empire could be transferred to someone else and he’d be completely fine with it

He’d be fine going back to a simple life

Perhaps he’d even prefer it over all the frugality of court life

And it would all be because of you

Beautiful and kind you who had shown him true love

Not fake nor manufactured to manipulate him to certain ideals or sides

Just true and pure love that formed through meaningful conversations and a beautiful friendship

So he swallows down the silver liquid

Ignoring the taste and how he feels his sanity slipping each time he take yet another

Though he bares heirs in the form of sons he never takes an empress or official partner

For in his heart that place is forever filled by you

And as he lays dying as he tours his beautiful land

The land in which you traversed and loved oh so dearly

He can’t help but smile as his tells his guards to let you in

They cast you glances of curiosity that he straightens out with his glare

He asks for privacy and they comply

Leaving you and him alone yet again like those nights long past where you and him would talk

He raises a hand to caress your face

“I think this is my end, I feel myself slipping every moment”

There is no sadness in his voice, just a chuckle as he gazed up at your beautiful face highlighted by glistening tears

They remind him of diamonds or the morning-dew

“I’m sorry I couldn’t visit sooner-“

“Shhh, it’s alright. What matters is now”

At that you have a small smile that makes his heart beat faster than it had in months

For a long while now he knew he was on the brink of death but still pretended (even to himself) that he’d be fine

He was emperor

The king of kings

But now as he lay in his death bed, Alone with the one person who seen him as he is

He was no longer king, he was Ying Zheng

Someone who was utterly human

A man in pursuit of that horridly consuming emotion of love

Requited or not he didn’t care

All that did matter was that he try, try to make you happy

To ease your emotions of utterly loneliness at loosing almost everyone you come to care for

You don’t curse death but he does in your place

How can he not when he shall never see your face again in the afterlife

You may have accepted death as a natural part of life

That it’s alright you will never see your friends again

But he thinks it’s cruel

A awful fate for someone as radiant as yourself

You seem to see his thoughts and silences them with a smile as a gentle hand cradles his face

All this thoughts of cursing death pause

And he focuses on you

The gentle curve of your face that was shaped with skilled hands

Those tear lined eyes that outshine any jewel in his treasury

A smile that outshined the very sun in the sky

Skin softer than the best silk robes he wears as he awaits death

The harsh cold ranking his body fades away and all he feels is warmth

A warm numbness taking over

You say something but he can’t hear it

He says so in a soft voice that comes out as a whisper

You nod

He’s fading by the moment

A part of him has accepted this fate but the other still fights

Still wishes and begs to just push further

Immortality could still be possible

But as you lean closer that voice quieted down

Both did

All he focused on was you giving him something he had wanted for years

Lips connect and he feels a jolt of many emotions

Joy

Sadness

Relief

And Peace

He swears he sees purple sparks flutter around you like petals of soft flowers

This was your goodbye to him

A kiss of goodbye

A kiss of reciprocated feelings between one another

A kiss of star crossed lovers bound to a fate of their love never working

And a kiss of death

“I hope I have a next life where we may meet again so you don’t have to be alone once more”

After so long of the afterlife and it’s pleasant buzz of apathy he’s suddenly confused when he wakes up

Well more like being woken up by yelling and the sound of breaking things as other men around him look just as disoriented and confused as he was

But then a woman appears, one dressed in white with a otherworldly aura

The look in her eyes is determined and simultaneously baring the weight of the world in them

He gets up from laying down in his casket, silken robes swaying as his feet touch the marble ground

He’s alive once more and somehow younger

In his prime again

In that moment he’s tempted to just leave the room and head out to find you once more but waits

He suspects The ethereal woman standing unafraid in front of him and the various other men who seemed to be warriors is the reason behind this

And has a reason as to why she chose very specific people to seemingly bring back from the dead

And not long after he learns that reason

“The gods want to wipe out humanity. I chose you all to participate in Ragnarok, a battle of 13 chosen contestants against the gods to the death. the determiner of humanity’s fate”

Ah, now that makes sense

But then why did she say 13?

There are 12 fighters here and she doesn’t seem as if she’ll be participating

She seems to most likely be the player in this game

Their her pieces to lead into battle so-

Suddenly his eyes dart to the doors across the room

They open and he watches as a familiar person enters

One who’s face was forever ingrained in his mind from restless nights left awake

Someone with the same smile as the day he first had a real conversation with them

It’s you

Before anyone could react he’s already across the room

Silk robes fluttering in the air as he darts past other warriors of different times eras

You have the same beautiful smile on your face

Arms already open wide as the first emperor crashes into your form

Arms wrapped tightly around you as if you’d disappear if he let go

Words in his mother tongue that was now a dead language fall from his mouth

Hushed rambles unbefitting of a king yet he doesn’t give a fuck

Why should he when your here

He was no king in your presence

For he was just a man with his heart on a platter, handing it to your gentle but weathered hands

It would not matter if you crushed it or treasured it

Only that you accept it

The room is completely quiet as you respond back in the same tongue

Almost as if you’d spoken it everyday and not in literal centuries

he holds back tears that will be saved for later when he had an actual private moment with you

With some hesitation he pulls back

Still feeling as if you’d disappear like sand between his fingers if he let go

But when he does he’s simply met once more with your smiling face

It shines radiantly like the sun, moon and stars

You were his sun, moon and stars

“We have a lot to catch up on Qin”

“Yes we do beloved”

“Beloved? Heh, I wish you had called me that much sooner than years after your death”

“I have some time to make up for that don’t I?”

“Not much…but it should be enough for me. I’ve missed you”

“As did I”

Safe to say after a bit of an explanation from the Valkyrie who introduced herself as Brunhilde the other warriors as hounding him for answers

Particularly cause many of them were apparently some past friends of yours

Some before and after his death

It’s interesting meeting the many he heard about in person

But what’s more is the ones that came after him

The fact that you’d apparently mention him

Or someone close to his description who was very dear to you

It’s odd hearing about his legacy but from your words

They spoke of his character and didn’t focus on the achievements

Highlighted the fact he was a human

A man just like any other who had risen from poverty to power

His misdeeds but also a reason as to why such decisions were made

A balanced perspective

Not like he’d except anything else from you

A true historian through and through

Much had changed throughout the years

The world was completely different from his time, as was his empire

It’s to be expected though and he enjoys learning all that had changed

In the quiet moments you talk he finds himself content

Sure, he’s supposed to be facing a god soon who has a good chance of killing him

But at the moment it doesn’t matter

There’s still time before the matches begin

Still town to train with not only his fellow contestants but also you

Something he particularly was excited about since he’d never seen you seriously fight

Well until now

Your true immortality come full purpose

Wound after wound being instantly healed with a few sparks of purple lightning fizzing around your form

Loud strikes echoing in the training grounds as he watches from afar

Gods he feels weak at the sight of your battle determined face

Violet lightning making your form look even more powerful

A few warriors like Lü Bu and Raiden tease him for being whipped for you

But the others seem to enjoy how this prideful king does a 180 the moment your around

It’s fun and nice

Though they had not known him for long they get the sense he’s a guarded man

Someone who had been hurt and vowed to not show that vulnerability once more

But it seems you had changed that

Breaking through that wall around his heart to let his true self deep through the cracks

While alone with you it’s a calm but joyful experience

You lay in his lap, head readying against his thighs covered in soft silky material

You say he doesn’t have to do so, but he insists

Despite loving in indulging in luxuries it seemingly switched when you were around

Him wanting to instead indulge you in the greatest he could offer

You don’t need it but its nice being cared for

Gently held by warm hands that help the tenseness in your shoulders or plays with your hair

once in his presence you allow yourself to enjoy in this indulgence

Small protests going away as soon as you laid down on hundreds of cushions as he worked his metaphorical magic

Conversations here go beyond what had just changed

Often reminiscing of old court life and what you had done or seen over the years

The people you’d met

The places you’d wished you could have taken him to

Outside of his room is an arena where the weight of the world weighs on both your shoulders

But in here it’s just you both catching up on lost time

Affectionately in each others embrace

Old and new nicknames falling from each others lips

Flowery language long abandoned by the world in a dead language brought back

A love not meant to be now brought back from the ashes like a Phoenix

Sometimes he thinks this is a dream he’ll wake up from

Being cruelly ripped from your loving arms and back into that of deaths cold embrace

But as you kiss comforts into his ears the thought melts away

He was in heaven

This was something he’d fight for

A mere mortal like him in the arms of something Divine

Something that would be frowned upon yet neither of you cared

Not when you’d both awaited to reunite despite fate saying naught

“You make me feel alive…human even”

“Who’s to say you aren’t human in the first place?”

“I’m a soulless being, one made of artificial flesh and lightning coursing through my veins. I’d say I’m hardly human”

“Your the most beautiful thing ever created ”

Your father contrary to Qin’s initial beliefs is practically radiating joy when he meets the former king

Hephaestus is jolly, giving a firm handshake despite being a god

It’s a bit jarring at first

But in a good way

It’s no wonder you become the person you are today, especially with such a gruff yet gentle man that had made you with his bare hands

Smouldering smoke wafts up from the man’s singed beard

Embers glowing softly when you embrace him with the same kindness he exudes

He smells of the forge, metal, sweat, ash and fire

It’s a deep contrast to your more earthy toned one

Something that spoke of adventure and travel

Yet despite the glaring differences your both much alike

A father and his child

Different yet more alike than what meets the eyes

Talk with Hephaestus is easy

Eager to hear of how you both met or ramble about his inventions

The way he seems so genuinely engaged with any type of small conversation makes Qin think of himself as a kid

Someone who everyone looked down upon and never gave the light of day

A begging soul pleading for someone to listen

He feels an knot of rage and pain wind up in his soul

This god was caring, more caring than many of the people he encountered in his life

A man who loved his work

His home

His craft

Yet no one listened

No one cared

No one accept his child and now the human contestants of this arena

The two form a deep friendship

Something formed through similar hardships

A kinship made through the unspoken words of “I get it” and “your not alone”

It makes you happy your father found a friend in the one you hold dearest to your heart

As does Qin who becomes more sympathetic as to why Hephaestus was so happy for you finding love in the first place

A marriage that was unhappy from the start

Trying to make the best of it anyways

Continued sorrow

Heartbreak

Betrayal from a brother

Wanting some type of love from anyone

Qin swears to himself if he’d ever encounter those who had made this man’s life hell he’d put them through the same

No one gets away with hurting someone important to the Emperor

Especially not family

“Treat them right and don’t break their heart boy. That’s all I ask of you.”

“You don’t need to say it twice. You have my word as Emperor”

“Heh, I like you. How about we talk business later, I’d hate to see you break that second requirement due to this whole fiasco”

The 7th round steadily approaches much to your anxiety

It’s noticeable to him how scared you are for him

The other can’t tell but he’s been around you enough to know your quirks

The slight tapping of your finger

Small bursts of violet sparks

The way your eyes seem more cloudy

He does his best to show you not to worry

That he’s strong enough to up against whoever is pitted against him

He spars with Kojiro and even is able to get Buddha to give some extra pointers to ease your mind

It doesn’t do much though

He can’t exactly blame you, once before you saw him die peacefully

But now there’s a chance you’ll see it again in a violent manner

He could already imagine how hard that first death was for you

The second would be devastating

Seeing those tear stained eyes was enough for him to promise himself he’d win no matter the Cost

He’d discard an arm or leg if he had to

But he had to win for you

For humanity that you love with a whole heart

This world was worth protecting

With a sigh he reclines back in the red cushioned throne

Soon he’d be out in that arena

Life or death

This VIP section was nice except for the nosey people already there

Though he wondered where you were, you said you’d meet him here?

Maybe you got lost..,he remembers the time you ended up in a different castle by accident

The memory makes him smile

Even as he’s flipping the man who grabbed him into the ground like he’s nothing

These guys need to humble themselves

Their in the presence of an emperor

The king of kings

Despite saying this aloud the big guy doesn’t get the picture

He blabbers on about being a god before Qin once again flips the man onto the stone ground

The other man though seems amused and offers a drink

One that he kindly accepts as he is about to question if the messenger of the gods can find you-

Turns out this “wasn’t” his room

Something of which you gently tell him with a laugh

Brunhilde looked less amused as you did

As did Ares

But Hermes found it seemingly hilarious

Especially since everyone else in the room can’t help but deadpan as he pulls you into the seat with him

Holding you close as you sigh with a small grin and accept his affection

It is a small moment of comfort

One that both of you know wont last forever

Or wont be guaranteed in the future

Despite that he is confident as ever

Something that makes you want to simultaneously bash your head into a wall about and smile at his unwavering spirit

The emperor’s after him roll out a carpet for him to walk down

But before that he pulls you aside

“Don’t die on me again….” The words are choked up in your throat but your able to get them out after a moment “please Qin, I love you too much to loose you again”

“Have some faith in me. I’m an emperor, king of kings, and you’re my divine being. You have me your blessing of love, that enough will get me through this” the tone in which he says this is both confident and gentle. He kneels down, pressing his lip’s against your knuckles. It leaves the onlooking pair of gods and Valkyrie’s agape.

He gets up, standing on the balcony to jump down towards his carpeted walkway. But just before he can you pull him down and press a passionate kiss against his lips. The crowd goes wild in both confusion and shock. “Call this an extra blessing” at that comment he smiles.

You turn to leave the god area with the two Valkyrie sisters, but not before turning to the two gods. “Sorry for the trouble. I can definitely say though that I won’t be pulling something like that for my round” as you say this you look over your shoulder, surveying their reactions. Ares is shock, Hermes like before is amusement and curiosity. You were a contestant, how interesting.

The fight is long and arduous

Armour enchanted and enchanted by both Hephaestus and his Völunder

Hephaestus couldn’t do too much in case of suspicion but he did make it a bit more durable and light

He’s bloodied and bruised

An arm was lost

But despite it all he won

He won for humanity

Won for you

And somehow in the process won the respect of the god he was faced against

Hades, king of the underworld

The only other man he’d call a king, for he in this fight had truly showed he earned that title

Both went into this battle for someone

But he prevailed in the end cause you were still there to fight for

This wasn’t a fight for revenge like Hades gad set out to do

His fight was to sustain you and the rest of the world

To keep you safe and happy

Preserve the world you loved despite its flaws

Qin Shi Haung for a portion of his life had nothing

But now that he had the love of someone he would do his best to keep it intact

To forever keep a smile on your face to keep his sun in the sky

Despite how much he’s in pain from both his injuries and his Mirror Touch Synesthesia he gives his respect to Hades

His foe

His equal as a king

His friend

Alvitr is screaming in his mind to get to the medbay already but he waits a moment as the dust settles

Both sides after cheering from humans and shock from gods quiets down

Alvitr appears at his side just as injured as he is

She almost tumbles to the ground

Before he can catch her someone jumps out from the stands beside Chun Yan and her son

A kasa hat with a veil trailing behind it fluttering in the wind as the warrior wearing it rushes towards the two

It happens within a split second but your at their sides

Grabbing the two inured winners

“Careful, you won and can’t just go dying on me after all that”

He chuckles at that, leaning into your touch as Alvitr gives a small tired thanks

You smile, your own thank you falling from your lips for protecting him

For making sure he got out of this alive

“Don’t attribute that to me. The entire time this prideful king had someone on his mind” she says this in a cheeky tone as you carry them both back to the medbay

A certain pep in your step

The crowd of both sides watches on with curiosity

In the medbay as they both are put into pods you await by their sides

Watching patiently

A hand against the glass encasing him

Your dad was already at work on a prosthetic for both of them

Something you were grateful for

You think back to the fight

It leaves…and unknown taste in your mouth that’s bitter and sweet

Qin had won

But in the process Hades was dead

You didn’t know your “family” well except for the snippets your father told you

Almost all were bad

All used him for their own goals or belittled him for his appearance

But from what you removed Hades was one who was seemingly neutral

Perhaps even somewhat kind to your father

Thanking him for his work done

Glaring at opposers who insulted him

In that sense he earned your respect

But with the battle you saw more if his character

Poseidon you couldn’t care less about but with Hades you felt more conflicted

Sighing you lean back resting yourself against the pod

There’s silence and then you hear something

Looking down you see his eyes cracked slightly open

His now only remaining hand pressing against the glass just like your own

His eyes close once more and you keep your hand atop his own

A pane of glass separating the two of you

Despite not needing sleep you close your eyes

Resting against the glass

Eventually you feel something draped over your shoulders

Turning your head you see Chun Yun and her son

Both with worried expressions but also happiness

His hand pressed against the glass trying to reach to yours is prof enough he’s still fighting

Fighting for you

And your waiting here for him

The woman who became his mother figure and her son pull up seats near your own

You feel a smile cross your face

“I’d wait till the end of time for you to wake up. Take as long as you need, I’ll be there when you wake”

#romantic #ror qin shi huang x reader #qin shi huang x reader #record of ragnarok #record of ragnarok x reader #ror x reader

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overthinkthis · 1 year ago

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transmasc feelings about The Sign ep. 6

I might be a little late with this but I finally realised that while most fandom discourse isn't really my thing, what I do love is reading why shows or certain characters or even a single scene make people feel a lot of things (especially when I personally don't relate to it that much). And The Sign has me sooo deep in my trans feelings, I need to share some of that.

Other people have already pointed out how Tharn can be read as a trans man, having been a princess in another life. And he's short (compared to the others). I know, not all trans men are short, but I am, so it's a trait that always helps me identify with a character.

The main thing though and the reason I'm writing this is his struggle for agency. Because in my experience, the first point of attack on trans men is exactly our agency. We're told we're just naive, confused (autistic) little girls, seduced by the patriachy to reject our own femininity. Victims of our own internalised misogony. That we can't be trusted to make our own decisions, that we need to be 'protected' by being denied our bodily autonomy.

And the way people treat Tharn feels so similar to this. Everyone is pushing him, everyone acts like they know better whether he should date Phaya and even when it comes from a good place (like with Yai) or can be seen as harmless banter, it's still a lot. And then we get the scene where Phaya punches Chalothorn and Tharn punches Phaya and I know this scene is controversial, but I love it! I don't want to comment on how well this worked in the context of the show but as an isolated scene I find it deeply cathartic to watch.

Chalothorn says he will do everything to keep Tharn from Phaya. Even if Tharn has to die.

I know it's because I'm biased but this oozes "I'd rather have a dead child/partner than a trans child/partner"-energy to me. And he gets punched for saying that! Obvs don't punch people irl if you can avoid it but seeing Phaya shut him down like that immediately was so satisfying to watch. Seeing the rage on Phaya's face alone, the same rage I feel for everyone trying to push people back into the suicidality of the closet for their own comfort, is just cathartic.

But then! Tharn punches Phaya and that is... bad, isn't it? Honestly, not to me. Phaya isn't just being a little bit pushy here, it is not the same situation as in ep 3 where Phaya also pushes boundaries but we see Tharn happily agree to the sparring match.

No, in this situation Tharn clearly states what he wants and Phaya ignores that and tries to forcefully drag Tharn away. We know that Phaya has his reasons. As an audience we know that trusting Chalothorn is the wrong choice but it is still Tharn's decision to make!

He punches Phaya and in that moment he takes back his agency, he asserts his boundaries and he isn't being punished for that. Phaya doesn't try to guilt-trip him later, he accepts that he was wrong in trying to force Tharn to come with him. This is also the reason why I don't mind Phaya persuing Tharn with such vigor, because this scene shows us that he will back off if Tharn really needs him to, and that he won't hold a grudge for being rejected. (yeah, again, don't punch people irl, but this is a tv series, it should speak to the parts of our brain that respond better to powerful images than logical reasoning)

And another nice thing this episode gives us is the scene with Yai afterwards. He still get in Tharn's business but instead of just acting like he knows what Tharn needs, he asks questions and then offers his own perspective and his support.

Because this is how you help someone in this kind of situation. Not by trying to tell them what to do (come out, stay in the closet, transition, not transition... if we stay with my trans analogy), but by telling them you will be there when things get rough. And that the thing you really want for them is to be happy.

#the sign the series #phayatharn #transmasc feelings #cw suicide mention #trans #the sign bl #the sign meta #is this even meta or just personal

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nono-bunny · 9 months ago

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The musical motifs, or lack thereof, of Kataang

@sokkastyles answered an ask about an anti-Zutara claiming that the Omashu story is about Kataang, which like, obviously anyone in the Zutara circles would realize is ridiculous, and they do a great job at articulating why, so go check that out! But the thing about the original claim that got me, though, was the mention of the Kataang theme. They mention having to look it up and finding it unremarkable, and this is where our experiences differ, I suppose- because for... whatever reason, I know EXACTLY what song that is, and as a song on its own? I like it a lot! It's very memorable for me, and I think it might be the only song on the OST I actually know the name of off the top of my head- The Avatar's Love. That said, it is... A complete failure at being a Kataang song- it's an Aang one.

It's important to note that I don't have an understanding/interest in music in the same way I do with writing, so I fully might be talking out of my ass or missing something, but... If I as a layperson can notice that something's off here, that still seems like something, and honestly I'd really love it for people who know more about music theory and whatnot to chime in here and give their takes on it!

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So. The Avatar's Love. Pretty straightforward name! Aspects of it are present throughout the show in different variations, and I believe this version, which is the one usually referred to, was taken from the end of the final episode. Aang is the Avatar, and he loves Katara, therefore one would think the song would be about Katara, or the two of them, right? Especially since it's playing when they get together! Well, actually, it's... Not. The song itself is beautiful, it's tender and gentle and has a sense of something growing throughout, and it's very believable as a song for Aang's growing feelings... For the first half of it. Honestly, because there's no official recording of this song yet, I'm not sure the second half of it is even the same song, but I've seen it included and excluded equally so for now I'll just treat it as if it is... Because weirdly enough, the first half, the one that most feels like its about romance and growing feelings- that plays over the expanded gaang's hijinks, and the second half is the part that actually plays when Aang and Katara get together.

Why is the second half a weird thing to play during the scene of Kataang getting together, then? Well, the second half kind of swerves and changes course a couple of times, introducing something different each time: once at 0:58, into something that istg was often used to close out an episode with the gaang flying away on Appa- arguably has to do with Katara because she's a part of the gaang, but it's definitely not about her specficially. Another is at 1:26, which briefly gives off an Iroh feel for whatever reason (as evidenced by all the comments about him in what is meant to be the Kataang song- this is a version that doesn't even have the tsungi horn which he plays over the song in the final episode!) before quickly ramping up to a very hopeful, almost ethereal sound that becomes what I think is a variation of the main theme... Because this is literally the thing that's closing out the show, and they had to get that in there ig.

So... Yeah, there's very little that evokes Katara in there, actually, if there's anything at all. There are two very distinct parts to it, neither of which is about Katara- one of them at least absolutely feels like it could be about Aang's feelings, though! But the other is a mix of several different other high impact songs, and is very obviously only there to close out the show and evoke positive emotions to supplement these two getting together completely out of nowhere- like, to the point where if you're just listening to it, it feels completely disconnected from the other half and leaves you confused at the change, because it needed to correspond with what's happening on screen when it's playing because there's no dialogue there, but you're not getting that context so thematically it's just kind of a confusing transitional mess, even if it sounds really good. I like the first half a lot, and even if it's only about Aang's feelings it at least feels relevant, but the second half is... Not great at being a theme for these two. This is a song about Aang's feelings for Katara, about winning and getting the girl, and there are virtually no traces of her presence here.

What does a song about Katara sound like, then? Well, I'm super glad you asked!

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Literally nothing like the song that's meant to be a representation of her and Aang's relationship! Until 1:24 where the iconic Avatar theme briefly comes into play, that's... Something? After all it also appears in The Avatar's Love! But it's not in there because of her, it's in both because it's just... One of the sounds that feature frequently in the soundtrack, because it's the main fucking theme of the show.

What about Aang? What does his song sound like? Is his sound actually more present in The Avatar's Love?

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Of course it is, because you see, Aang's theme fully IS just the main theme. He is well and fully represented in The Avatar's Love, while no trace of Katara's theme makes an appearance there, aside from the main theme, which is actually just Aang's theme.

Btw, remember those ethereal sounds that I mentioned appear towards the end of The Avatar's Love? You know where else they appear?

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That's right. The main title theme. To be fair, it IS narrated by Katara, which is... Something, I guess? Except... You listen to this song and hear Katara, but the words are all about Aang- Aang's gonna save the world, everybody, he's the Avatar! And... Katara is here to tell his story, I guess? This is the theme that closes out their "love story"- a story which is wholly centered around Aang.

So. Yeah. I think I've made it pretty clear by this point why I think The Avatar's Love does a bad job as the Kataang theme. I've never been and never will be a Kataang fan, but to bring it back to the post that inspired this one for a sec, for me what made the difference between not being a fan/preferring something else and actively disliking the ship is the lack of reciprocity that at its core stems from Bryke being idiots who wanted to have a will they/won't they without knowing how to make the eventual "they will" make sense.

This whole thing is absolutely not a slight against Jeremy Zuckerman, who I think did a fantastic job with scoring ATLA- the Kataang theme turning out like it did isn't his fault. Case in point, the Aang part of it is fantastic! But when the show had to bend over backwards to make Kataang happen very suddenly at the last second, in the closing shot of the show, my guess is that he had a choice to make- is this going to be a song about Aang and Katara coming together, or about ending the story with Aang fulfilling his destiny and getting his happy ending? And of course he chose the latter! Because the way Bryke wrote the story, there was no room for the former, there was no room for considering Katara outside of her attachment to Aang. That was never what Kataang was about, that's why she's barely a factor in their song- for Kataang to happen, Katara has to be taken out of the equation.

The Avatar's Love is not about the person the Avatar loves or even the love they share with each other, it's only about Aang and his feelings for Katara. It's not about a mutual relationship or even mutual feelings, it's about yearning and achieving your destiny... And then, and only then, getting The Girl.

#avatar the last airbender #atla #anti kataang #anti bryke #atla critical #Youtube

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kaija-rayne-author · 7 months ago

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Reaction to Dragon Age Veilguard Gameplay Preview. Editorial Critique.

Heads up... this isn't the most positive of reviews. And I'm a die hard (bleeding into the dirt) solavellan so if that's not your cup of tea you can stop reading here. Images and videos are all copyright of Bioware/EA. (Updated after the Q&A on June 14th)

Spoilers for all previous games, books, comics etc.

Content warnings for extremely colourful language.

I've worked really high powered corporate jobs, so I can play the part of cool, calm, perfect professional. But this is my gaming blog. I don't censor myself here. I grew up around truckers and it shows 😂.

I'm also neurodivergent so please know my emotions about this are confusion, sadness, a bit of horror, and depression. I've been told the way I use words can be read as confrontational. It's unintentional. (And again, it's my blog, I don't particularly feel it's right or necessary that I mask my AuDHD traits here, too.) I'm honestly not angry, or pissed off, or anything like that. Shrugs. I'm just sad. I don't bother to critique things I don't love. (Unless I'm being paid for it.) Much less to this extent. How much I've written here is in direct relation to how much I love Dragon Age.

Well.

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I've watched it. Twice. Once on slow mode so I could get a better glimpse at the details.

I re-watched the trailer that I hated twice more. Again once on slowmo.

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What. The. Actual. Fuck. Is. That?

It sure isn't Dragon Age. If it didn't have Bioware copyrighted material, I really wouldn't have been able to tell that it was supposed to be Dragon Age. If Rook had whipped out a light-sabre, it wouldn't have seemed out of setting. I want to play Dragon Age, not some weird Star Wars knock-off.

And yes, I know most of the fandom is going gaga at this point, but I don't understand why people can't see the issues amidst the excitement. Being the odd enby out in this situation is depressing as hell. I want to love it as much as everyone else seems to. But my editor brain won't shut up.

I'm used to having unpopular opinions. Just don't bloody crucify me for these. Editing media is my actual job. It's what I do. It's a highly developed, niche skill set I've been practising for over a decade.

Some people are extremely good with cars, I'm extremely good with editing. I only started doing it professionally because my writing critique partners told me my suggestions and the things I noticed were worth their weight in gold.

TBH, it wouldn't surprise me if I have some savantism when it comes to editing and writing. When I look at a piece of fiction in an editorial perspective, it's a lot like looking at a 4d puzzle for me. I can instinctively see what works, what doesn't, and how things that don't work can be tweaked so they do. I don't meet many others in my profession who do that.

And I have multiple NYT bestselling clients. I'm truly not talking out of my ass here. I'm not perfect, no human being is, but like many middle aged AuDHD/neurodivergent people, I know where my strengths and weaknesses lie. It comes off as arrogance for some reason to many people.

So, back to the preview.

It's got the right voice actors. It's got the copyrighted characters. It's got an absolutely terrible art style that is far too reminiscent of the comics for my taste. Because those comics were a travesty of both writing and art style.

And again, why the fuck does Varric have black hair? He's a strawberry blond! He looks like Varric and Blackwall DAI had a kid together. Or like they shrunk Blackwall DAI down. I don't want Varric to look like Blackwall. I didn't like him that much.

What? Did Varric have some sort of end of life crisis and dye his head, beard, and even his chest hair black? (Much reduced chest hair, fuck Bioware, why did you reduce his chest hair!) Did it all caterpillar its way up to his face? There were story significant reasons Varric was a dwarf without a beard. Did you forget that?

(Update from live stream Q&A. One of the devs said it's because Varric has been adventuring for a time and is mostly grey. That he's shown in dark light so it looks black.) Uhuh.

Reality bites sometimes, cause my dad is a strawberry blond gone grey and he never looks like he has black hair. Not even in the dark. But whatever. They've got an excuse for it. I don't buy it because it doesn't track with y'know, how hair usually works.

I could maybe get used to the steampunk vibe? Big maybe. That's still within the realm of Dark Fantasy.

Also... I've seen some reaction videos and y'all... Dark Fantasy is a genre. It has absolutely nothing to do with the colour palette! It means it's fantasy with dark/horror elements FFS!

I swear the reading comprehension of people has suffered since I was a kid.

But, but, but... if you've been reading me for a while you had to know that was coming.

What. The. Fuck. Is. This?

Walmart Sans? Bad Halloween decor they couldn't sell until it was 99% off at a home goods store?

Is that... is that supposed to be a Darkspawn? SERIOUSLY!?! Given a Warden was fighting it, I have to assume someone at Bioware has ergot poisoning.

It looks like a modern cartoon version of Skeletor. Which is definitely insulting to Skeletor. This dude looks like he's got on his tights, speedo, boots, a bitchin' mohawk, and orange lights on his garb for the Halloween party at the club. He might win best costume, but he fails at being a Darkspawn.

They didn't just swing and miss with going to the club dude, they couldn't even find the bat and glove.

And yes, I've heard the 'lore' excuse that it's the red lyrium warping them that way. I could buy that if they were A) red lights, not orange. B) Kinda spiky, crystal-like in structure. Y'know, like the red lyrium infected creatures in DAI? (That's called continuity.)

The lines are too smooth, bone doesn't warp like that, and he (the ogre version too) seriously just look like really bad Halloween decorations.

Also, whoever drew that needs to study human anatomy a bit more. That skull shape is so wrong. In so many ways. Former forensic anthropologist and artist. I've held more human skulls than people can probably guess. I've literally pieced them back together. I'm not awful at drawing either. That image is just bad.

I'm not a player who lusts to have DAO back as the only kind of Dragon Age. I've loved them all for different reasons. Games change over the years as new ideas, new creators, and new technology comes out. That's honestly a good thing. Innovation is awesome. Most of the time.

Sometimes it's a complete miss. Like with going to the club dude up there. I love a lot about the art in these games. It's a large part of why I play them. And that thing up there? That's not a Darkspawn.

THIS is a Darkspawn.

This is a Darkspawn.

This is a Darkspawn

They're supposed to be kinda gut wrenchingly horrific. The graphics are older yeah, but maybe you get my point? If you know the Lore of Dragon Age... I've marinated myself in it... the Darkspawn are blight corrupted humans, dwarves, qunari, and elves.

It's supposed to be the whole concept of 'what used to be, but no longer is' that's often used in horror. You know... the thing that looks like it was at one time a deer but is walking on its hind legs with a broken neck and glowy eyes that sends atavistic shivers down your spine?

They aren't... modern cartoon Skeletors or the Halloween deco you hide in the back of the garage 'cause you're embarrassed you ever bought it.

WTAF were they thinking? I honestly can't get past my utterly confused shock on this whole thing.

I've been saying for quite a while now that Bioware needs better developmental and diversity editors. (Or maybe even any? Do they have any? 'Cause that preview really makes me doubt it.) And uh... well. Yeah. That. (I'm an editor, yes. I do both kinds, yes. I'm very good at it, yes. No, this is not me hoping for a job at Bioware/EA.)

I suppose me writing all this down is mostly just to get it out of my head. And to maybe let other disappointed Dragon Age fans know they aren't alone. Given some of the things I've seen on the 'net. I'm far and away from being alone in these opinions. You're not wrong. They've absolutely changed it so much it doesn't even remotely feel like Dragon Age.

And no, before you take that and run with it in an anti-diversity direction, I utterly love that they depicted Rook as Black. I love that Davrin is a Black elf. I love that Neve has a prosthetic leg. It's not the diversity changes I have an issue with. I adore those.

Snorts. Would I accept a job if a Bioware fairy dropped into my life and offered me a good living to look critically at that game for problems that could maybe be fixed?

Probably. They'd likely pay better than my current job. And I really do love Dragon Age so much that if I could contribute to it in a way that made us middle-aged gamers happy too? It would be pleasing.

The likelyhood of that is probably akin to winning the lotto though, so no, it's not the point of my post.

But I'm going to slide this monstrosity of a post toward the devs. Maybe they'll listen to the free editorial critique and make this game make a wee bit more sense? Or at least feel like Dragon Age, sheesh.

Because who the actual fuck wrote most of that dialogue?

I want to point my finger at the ground and scold them like a puppy who peed on the carpet.

Then give them a really basic 101 lesson on dialogue.

It was either boring for the player characters (I absolutely assume it will get better there, it was just the beginning of the game, to be fair). And I definitely trust Patrick Weekes to have done an amazing job as lead writer for most things.

But I really would've figured that Bioware would know by now that fans want to know what the character is going to say exactly before picking an option. Not just a yes, no, mediocre choice. Players have been pretty loud about that. BG3 gave us (mostly) what we wanted and it swept GOTY.

The rest of the dialogue was such freaking factory canned bullshit that I almost rolled my eyes out of my head. Which would've been awkward. Fishing them out from under the dresser and all.

A Venatori shouting 'avenge our fallen brethren' (or whatever, I'm not watching it again to get the exact dialogue) has so much stanky cheese on it I can't even. People don't talk like that. Apparently, a few Bioware writers could stand to take a few writing classes. That's basic.

Patrick Weekes is an amazingly skilled writer. But obviously, not all Bioware writers are. (Snorts, which I know very well and it's why I'm so disappointed they chose Lucanis.)

Although, since Mary Kirby did the writing for him for the game (glares at Bioware) there may be hope for him.

Music? There was music? Hans Zimmer was a bloody mistake. Everything he's made in the past decade has sounded the same. Such a shame, because the soundtrack of DAI was epic.

The demons are fine-ish? I guess? If you utterly ignore how similar they look to Fortnite demons. They look a bit weird, but demons are just emotional emanations from the fade so could conceivably look like anything they wanted. (Lolz, the rather skilled artists I know are kinda pissed off at the lack of artistic skill used for their development. Even the under 30 years old ones. Especially them.)

But also... they had really cool demons already designed from DAI (from what I understand they used the same engine, Frostbite). Why didn't they just give them a glow up and use them?

This dude would've been way better for the pride demon. Plus, there would've been some continuity between DA:I and DA:V. In series work, some continuity is important. Or the thing doesn't feel like the thing. Just like based on those previews this doesn't feel even remotely like Dragon Age.

While I don't have epilepsy, I can guarantee those demons as pictured/audio in the preview are going to give me and probably many other gamers massive headaches. Gods know what they'll do to people who actually do have epilepsy. I mean... there are epileptic gamers. Gaming is supposed to be inclusive.

And I don't really want to fight Fortnite demons. I want to fight Dragon Age demons. I don't like Fortnite. (Or, y'know, I'd spend my money and time playing Fortnite?)

Why are there so many freaking Venatori? I mean... I'm flattered to have been right when I called it that we'd be fighting them again. But in Tevinter Nights they're depicted as being on their last legs as an organization.

They're freaking everywhere in the gameplay preview? You fight so many of them! They're like toadstools after a rainstorm. Popping up like daisies! Whatever. Guess the major amount of bad guys in the Tevinter cities is likely to be Venatori. Which is just weird considering their god, Coryphyfish, is dead.

And dear gods he had better stay dead. He was such a lackluster villain in DAI to start with. And bringing back a previous defeated-supposed-to-be-dead villain is an overused fantasy trope that needs to die the miserable death it deserves already.

Again with the Venatori. A little uninspired to be completely frank.

I bet they have huge spiders in this game somewhere, too. Sigh. Why is it always spiders? Or wolves? Or big cats? It's fantasy! Where is the creativity? (Also, you know that's kinda ableist against people with arachnaphobia, right? Which is a lot of people.)

But I've gone on at length before about Bioware and their ableism issues. (Which is why they need diversity editors.) I personally like spiders, but they could at least stop having them everywhere. Or give arachnophobic gamers the option to turn them off or replace them with a different image.

Moving on from their complete loss of the horror element with the Darkspawn; I wouldn't be scared of that thing even if it surprised me in the dark. I'd laugh at it. (And I'm a jumpy person. A lot of things can scare me if they come at me in the dark.)

And I'll ignore the absolutely uninspired bad guys in Minrathous, and the Fortnite clone demons.

What is that thing Bellara is holding?

It sure as fuck isn't a bow. Someone has been playing Final Fantasy a little too much. Don't get me wrong, I've got a lot of hours in FF. I like it a lot. But one of my major complaints about it? Is the completely, utterly, ridiculous weapons. Someone is compensating. Not sure what exactly they're compensating for but it's for something. Sheesh.

I've always loved the somewhat realistic-ish weapons in the Dragon Age universe. I mean, yeah. Still heavy on fantasy... but they at least looked like they'd work. I loved Neve's reduced staff, that was awesome! Whatever Bellara is holding does not look like it would work.

I remember grinding for days in FF to get a special bow. Bows are my thing in a lot of games. When I got it made, it looked like someone had glued two surfboards together and tried to call it a bow. Bows have to be, y'know, functional? All weapons do? That's rather the point?

So... I'm not an archer and if you are, do feel free to weigh in, but would that thing even work?

A bow is a precision instrument. Our species has had bows for a long damned time and their form hasn't really changed all that much. Because they, y'know, work the way they are, and don't if you change them too much?

You've got the curved wood/horn/other material with a string kind (I'm being deliberately simple in terminology, I do actually know what a bunch of bow types are called) and you have the cross bow type.

What we do not have is front heavy monstrosities like that thing. Okay, okay, she's a veil jumper. Maybe she got it from some ancient Arlathan temple or something. But the ancient Elvhenan were supposed to be technologically advanced. Not Final Fantasy obsessed gamers.

Oh, but what about Bianca, gods rest her beautifully crafted soul. They excused that as a one of a kind thing never to be replicated. It's handwavium, but fine, rule of cool works for her. It doesn't work for whatever Bellara is holding unless they come up with a damned good story reason for it. (And it had better be damned good 'cause that thing might be pretty, but it's just severely uneducated about weaponry, at best.)

Also, why couldn't it have been the less useful Bianca Solas blew to bits? (Can't stand the dwarf version in the slightest.)

Moving on.

The settings look interesting. The teams doing the backgrounds and settings have always blown it out of the park, so I imagine they'll be suitably gorgeous when we actually do see the game.

Though I had sorta expected Arlathan to look a little more... jungley forest like, rather than paved shopping mall. But whatever, I'm hopeful there'll be better parts of it later in the game.

Rook looks like they'll be fun to play. And I really hope we're not class locked as a rogue. Rogues are my usual choice but I'd still like to have the choice. (Edit. Reports say we have complete flexibility in our character creation. I just want to know if I can make a fat adventurer.)

The steampunky science-fantasy vibe. Enh. It's not my favourite. I feel it was a mistake to try to horseshoe the depicted kinds of science into the fantasy of Dragon Age that way. Because it really feels shoved in whether it fit or not.

And I write science-fantasy, so it's not like I don't love it. I adore it. It's just something that sort of has to be designed that way from the start. Which Dragon Age most certainly was not. Don't they ever get sick of retconning stuff? I sure get sick of seeing the retconned stuff.

I could see how Minrathous might use magic in a way that we use neon lighting. Or for any number of cool fantasy type magical uses. I just don't get why it had to look like a Star-Wars knock off. If I wanted to play Star Wars, I'd, y'know, play Star Wars?

I think they did capture the grunge and dirtiness and personality of an ancient city pretty well. Like it almost has a consciousness of its own. But as I've said many places, the settings artists are freaking amazing at what they do.

Although, if they have floaty spaceship like things why exactly are the Qunari even a worry? I don't have strong feelings one way or the other on the Qunari, but I know a lot of gamers were hoping to see a Tevinter/Qunari war. If Tevinter has space shippy things, what threat could the Qunari possibly be? Or even the teased Minrathous monsters?

Last I checked (which was a couple of days ago, re-reading those awful comics) the Qunari were still using bows, swords, spears, and knife type war implements. Some bombs, too, because gatlock. And enslaved, lyrium addicted mages.

Big floaty space-shippy thing means small floaty space-shippy things because that's how invention works. Where are the small ones? That thing is just a plot hole the size of Canada. (And a skilled developmental editor could've told them that before they put it in the sky. Sheesh.)

The fighting and conversation options look very similar to DA2. I liked the fighting in DA2 so after the usual adjustment to a new game it would probably be fine. Not sure how I feel about only having the ability to have two companions.

That art style though? I just cannot imagine having romantic scenes with characters done in that art style. And the Romances in Dragon Age are a large part of why I play them. Cartoon sexy times aren't my thing.

You do you, I'm not judging. But for me cartoony sexy times are just weird. Not sexy.

And no matter what they said after that disastrous character reveal the other day, the gameplay reveal doesn't look different enough for me to not call it cartoony. Especially for those Halloween decorations.

Now, I need to get to the end where we see some weird looking mage who I think is supposed to be Solas.

Really? That's supposed to be Solas?

This is the Solas my solavellan heart fell for so hard I've been simping over him for the entire time since I started playing these games.

Regardless. THIS is Solas.

Beautiful, nerdy, a little stylized, but with an art style that really worked for me (and probably most other solavellans given how much we love him).

So who in the living fuck is this?

I guess he's Solas shaped. But he doesn't make my heart squeeze in that OMG he's finally back!! way. He doesn't do anything for me. All I feel is numbness for that version of Solas. Which is disappointing as hell.

I didn't really have high hopes for him given his early looks for this game, but dang. Just dang. He's like a plastic ken doll. Very much like a too shiny plastic ken doll. And while I know Gareth David-Lloyd did the voice acting for him, he somehow doesn't even sound like Solas?

I've also been sadly informed by someone who would know that that is the absolute best they could do with him. We're not getting him fixed no matter how much we scream. He doesn't even have freckles! (And your eyes are fooling you if you think you're seeing them. Our brains often do that. Fill in things that should be there when they really aren't. There was some sort of design issue snafu which is why he doesn't have and cannot have freckles. This is confirmed insider information.) Freaking Lace Harding is peppered with them. Why can't my Solas have freckles?

Edit from Q&A (I think? It's second hand). Someone said they wanted to make everything look more 'painterly'.

Listen. I paint. Digitally and traditionally. You really have to work at it to get something that texture free. That's not 'painterly' its like... glossy modern playing cards. I hate it. Especially given the kind of fresco style paintings that Solas did in DAI. There is ALL sorts of texture with those.

Sigh. Maybe he'll grow on me. Like virulent mould. (Edit. He honestly hasn't. Every picture I see of him kills Dragon Age a little more for me. Which is bloody heartbreaking.)

IDEK man. I keep asking myself what Bioware was thinking. This game feels like it was made for a much different type of gamer than those of us who have loved the previous games for so very long.

It feels like they were trying to draw in a younger crowd while almost keeping the appeal that held us older gamers. That 'almost' is important there. (Edit. Confirmed by John Epler during live Q&A. This is exactly what they did. I feel incredibly betrayed.)

We older gamers are the ones who've kept hope for this game alive. Who have kept Dragon Age alive. The company made it, but without us hoping for it, talking about it, making mods for it, repeatedly replaying it? Would it ever have gotten there?

And we get Fortnite demons, Ken doll Solas, Halloween decoration 'darkspawn', and space shippy nonsense that kills about 50% of their foreshadowing.

I know I'm not the only older Dragon Age player feeling a little (lot) betrayed right now.

Based on these two trailers (and I'm absolutely praying I'm wrong) I think they failed project Dragon Age. Miserably.

I am pleased to learn that there are confirmed non-binary options for character creation and decent hair. So that's a plus. (Looks at the drops in the bottom of the almost empty bucket and sighs.)

I'd still like to play the game. I'd honestly LOVE to be wrong in my opinions on this. I'd really, really love to be wrong as much as I love Dragon Age.

I will happily sit down to a meal of crow if I'm wrong. I want to be wrong, because I love Dragon Age.

Though, I'm pretty good at prediction. I have stereotypical autistic pattern matching, which is a lot of what prediction is.

But I'm sadly coming to an end of what I'll be able to write about Dragon Age, no matter how much I love it.

My computer, which is literally duct taped together, isn't going to be able to handle DA4. It can barely run BG3 without overheating. As much as I love my computer, (and I really do, I get attached like a lot of AuDHD people do) it has broken or missing keys, and several of the more important keys just don't work. The screen is also starting to go.

I have lived and breathed the art and lore on these games since I started playing them. They're one of my most prominent AuDHD special interests. It's killing part of my soul to know I won't get to play it.

I'm a disabled, neurodivergent editor/author with a family to support. There's absolutely no extra for me to save up for a new rig. I'm ineligible for disability aid because I'm an immigrant. (Not that you can actually survive on disability here, anyway.) And I live in Canada, which is having a rather obscene cost of living crisis right now.

Even with my issues with the... er... everything, I still want to know what happens. I want to see it for myself.

Being an editor makes reading/tv fraught for me. If a piece of media makes me feel like I'm at work I can't really enjoy it. And 99% of books/shows do. (Don't become an editor if you love to read.)

Games tend to have fewer things to trip up my editorial brain. (Not this particular game, obviously 😂.)

That's all to say that gaming is basically my only form of accessible entertainment. I do it a lot in whatever spare time I have.

Even with my misgivings on the previews. I really would like to both play it and be utterly, completely wrong about it. I'd love to be able to keep writing about Dragon Age. But without being able to play the next one, all I can really do is rehash old stuff.

My work of words is my only income. And most writers really don't make all that much. Editors can, but I'm currently working a job that pays less than minimum wage doing editing. I'm under NDA, so I can't even tell people which huge corporation a lot of people use every day pays their editors so poorly.

Doing freelance work, I make between $50 and $70 an hour. Because editing is skilled, niche work. Experienced editing even more so.

That's why someone can be an amazing writer and a shit editor. You really do have to dedicate yourself if you're going to be good at editing anything. Most people don't put in the time or effort. I'm a better editor than I am a writer. (I'm not an awful writer, I just know where my strengths lie 😂.)

But there isn't a whole lot of freelance work available since COVID.

My partner has a broken back from his last job so can't work (and they denied his disability because that makes complete sense) so we barely scrape together enough to pay the bills each month (and lately have been failing even on that).

I think Rook and company fucked up badly by interrupting Solas' ritual. Lolz, I rather hope Solas 'greatly disapproves' in Rook's head or something. That would be bleeding hilarious.

I suppose if Solas had... I dunno... talked to people and told them why he felt he needed to take down the veil it would've helped. But his arrogance always does get in the way. In the writing trade that's termed his fatal flaw.

I think what Rook did at the end there is probably going to get Varric and a whole lot of other people killed.

Solas killing Bianca was awful, yes (and the merciful option, btw, Bianca can be fixed, Varric can't). But I think it's just the prequel. I don't think our beloved Varric is gonna be around long enough to miss her.

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