#They would rule the world because they are the best
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So I'm writing a major sci-fi project that I'm expecting to take several years, if not upward of a decade, to complete. Part 1 takes place in a timeline where fascism has already set itself in place and is managing to dig in so deep that it'll take some very, very extreme measures to pull out the roots. In part 2 I visit a parallel timeline where fascism is getting its hooks into a galactic power and trying to go all "Earthgov in Babylon 5 season 2-4."
In both cases I'm having to dig into the cause of fascism and what causes entire groups of people to willfully step into situations where their own best interest is being actively worked against. What is it about fascism that makes it so appealing to large populations that they look at history and say, "...nah, it won't happen that way this time."
And I'm having to struggle against my own presupposition that humanity is fundamentally always looking out for the best way forward and actually learns from the mistakes that litter the past.
Fascism is so stupid! So much of the implementation of fascism in the early days relies on people being absolutely brick stupid. "I have precisely one way of effecting major change on the nation/world I live in...but I'm le-tired, so I'm not going to vote." "I haven't read a single book since I got out of high school," (said proudly, as though this is somehow an achievement). "History is just a bunch of boring dates about dead people, but by god World War 2 was the greatest moment in all the record of all the world! What do you mean, how did it start? Pearl Harbor, duh!" "What do you mean, we need to protect the rights of trannies and illegals?! They're criminals, they don't deserve rights! What'd'you mean I gotta prove it?! Just look at 'em, you can always tell!"
The worst part is there's no "Evil fascists playbook that we're going to pass down to our children's children," it's just the worst parts of base human nature that are repeated generation after generation. Over and over again throughout history good people have done their damnedest to codify the sorts of behaviors and cultural practices that would stop fascism, but so often the efforts are made with the idea in mind that there is some secret cabal of people that are orchestrating the complete, catastrophic downfall of mankind to prop up only one (1) central ruling body, and if we can just stop those people then that'll stop evil for sure this time!
There's a reason we look at movies like Idiocracy and have this bone-chilling reaction that this is what our future will look like. Even a cyberpunk dystopia would be better than the truth because at least we could commit crime to steal from the wealthy and powerful what should be ours by protected right, such as healthcare or even water. But the truth is so viscerally terrifying because there is no dictatorship that will result in the upward spiral of humanity advancing to the next stage of evolutionary existence. There's no technological leap that will push us to being better than we were that can be enforced by a single hegemony. Fascism and tyranny are fear responses to a world that's bigger than one person can control and understand. Whenever a fascist state rises, its fall begins the moment it stabilizes from the ruins of the nation it replaces. In every case, the fascist country was already in the process of collapsing by the time its neighbors began the process of fighting back and containing it. The Third Reich was going to collapse before a decade was out whether the Allies did anything to stop them or not because the foundation it was built on was white supremacist fairy floss and paranoid wishes. The Soviet Union shattered because an empire founded on misinformation and violent intimidation couldn't scale to the degrees they were attempting. Even the PRC is being eaten from the inside by movements that are inherently more humanitarian and forward thinking.
The drive to be better to your fellow people is simply going to cause any fascist state to topple because 'being a better person' is an internal drive to each individual and 'subsume yourself to the state' is inherently opposed to it. The fascist state cannot abide individual excellence, people are born with the desire to grow and excel beyond their circumstances all the time. Fascism is inherently temporary, inherently self-destructive, and inherently a dead end.
This isn't to say it shouldn't be fought. Fascism is CATASTROPHICALLY destructive! Even a proto-fascist state like present-day (at the time of this writing...please tell me this will be out of date in two year's time!) United States of America is capable of doing massive amounts of irreparable harm in it's infantile flailing as it struggles to get its feet under it. Fascists need to be stopped. They need to be put down so hard the only thing needed for a grave is to fill in the hole from dropping them so hard. They need to have the fear of every god and goddess ever revealed, conceived, or imagined put in them and done so with a massive neon sign that can be read for the rest of human history that will tell fascists loud and clear what WILL happen to them if they ever try that shit again.
But the thing is; the fascists only seem to be working from the same playbook! Pick any evil empire throughout history that matches the definition of a fascist state and you'll see the exact...same...pattern, every single time. And it's not like these people read! They don't sit down and pour through documents looking for all the best ways to oppress a population and destroy the Earth, they just do it because fascism is stupid! If they actually read books and studied history they'd see that what they're doing, how they're behaving, and the way they're thinking is a failing formula. They will NOT be regarded as heroes! They will NOT be the great founders of a continent/world/solar system/galaxy spanning nation! They will be hated and reviled and hunted while they're alive and their deaths will be celebrated in ways that make the people celebrating Scrooge's death in A Christmas Carol's dark future timeline look like the most sentimental of mourning wakes. They will have their names listed with Haman and Caesar and George and Hitler and Pol Pot and Stalin and Regan as "People to find a way to make a pact with the devil to resurrect just so you can kill them again EVEN HARDER!" Their families will be ashamed of them. Their freaking mustache style will become known as "History's Worst Fashion Not" for men. They will be the butt of jokes about how the world could only be better without them in it.
THEY WOULD KNOW THAT THEY ARE ON A DEAD END PATH IF THEY JUST LEARNED FROM HISTORY!
But they don't read. And they don't want you to read. Not because they have this clever plan or ploy to ensure you don't get any ideas, but because just the thought that you might be smarter than them hurts their pwecious widdle fee-fees.
And, honestly? That's just so galling!
Like, we want Hitler to have been some magically charismatic individual who managed to superhumanly hypnotize an entire generation of Germans into becoming mass murderers. We want a generational cabal of secret elders in obscenely wealthy families who rigorously trains their children in the art of oppressing the lower classes. We want Trump to be this unstoppable business mogul with the entire world's wealthiest oligarchs in his pocket, ready to wield unspeakable power to shatter hundreds of years of progress in pursuit of human betterment.
We want these people to be megalomaniacal masterminds because the thought that all this damage and destruction and fear and terror and murder happening because a bunch of paranoid, infantile morons who you suspect would wet their own pants if they thought it'd be the next popular trend and secure them more power is just an insult to you. It's an insult to the people of [insert your country here]. It's an insult to the entire human race. It's an insult to all our daughter species that (universe willing) we'll eventually create to succeed us. To think that a whiny, pathetic, wet rag of a human being should manage to capture enough people's attention that they'll just hand over their rights, liberties, and freedoms in exchange for transparent lies makes anyone with a brain and a conscience recoil in atavistic horror.

What’s really occurring is an attack on the American mind. Ignorance is the handmaiden of tyranny.
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So I saw another edit of Jondami and Would you Fall in Love with Me Again from EPIC the Musical and I have gone down the rabbit hole and may never resurface. (I am obsessed with musicals and world mythos, and this is hitting all of my special interests at once) I know other people have done their versions of this, so this is mine.
What if when Jon goes to space, there isn't a dimensional time difference? What if each second of those six years of absence is felt by those who love him?
They all search for Superboy, tirelessly, relentlessly, but they can't find him. The Justice League, the Green Lantern Corp, and every ally they have ever made across space and time look for a child lost in the stars. And they all fail.
Clark never stops searching even though they all beg him to.
Lois mourns but still prepares for her son's return.
Konner and Kara pick up what is left behind because the world didn't stop needing their help when Jonathan Kent dissappears, but they ache in their grief.
Damian just stops.
After six months go by with no news, he gets desperate, studies magic and science for a way to bring his best friend home. It never works, and every empty lead and false hope breaks him.
So Damian searches and waits.
He joins Clark on his search in any way he is able, defying his father. He stays with Lois when Superman travels too far for him to follow. He sits in Jons kitchen and eats at his table consumed with longing.
When Clark comes home empty-handed each time, Damian holds them both as they cry in his too small arms. Lois and Clark thank him every time. Look at Damian and see a boy who believes just as much as they do that Jon lives still, that he will be back, that misses him.
All three hope.
Jon didn't plan to be gone long, didn't leave purposefully, or give any of them momentos. Everything he ever owned looks as he left it, ready for when he returns. His books, his clothes, his unmade bed.
Damian doesn't try to return to normalcy without Jon at his side.
Even when his father threatens to take Robin from him if he does not return to Gotham, Damian just rips the symbol from his chest and leaves the cave. What is the point of being a hero without Jon beside him? They promised they would do that together, and Damian would not betray him.
The rest of the batfamily try to encourage him to take a new name, a new team, or make new friends, but Damian refuses every attempt. He will do those things with Jon when he returns, not a second sooner.
When Bruce tells him he is waiting on a ghost, Damian feels his heart break, and he leaves permanently. Jon wouldn't be welcome in Gotham, anyway. Not with the no meta rule.
Lois and Clark take him in. So Lois is never alone, and they can wait together.
Clark refuses to give Damian back to Bruce. Damian asked to stay, and Clark will be damned if ever lets a child leave again if they dont want to. Bruce loses his temper and accuses him of using Damian to replace his dead son. Batman and Superman don't speak to each other again for a long time.
Talia, surprisingly, gives them temporary custody. She understands Damians longing and will never forsake any part of him he inherited from her.
Nightwing and the others visit the Kent house weekly and accept that Damian will not leave. They learn to be a better sort of family, loving their brother and starting to hope again for his sake. All of the bats, besides Bruce, have dinner with Lois and Clark twice a month. The seat beside Damian is always left empty.
Damians pets join him at Kent Farm, and Damian can't help but greive because this is the future he and Jon used to joke about under their covers during sleepovers. They used to imagine living together with as many animals as they wanted and building somewhere safe to come home to.
At least Damian can have one of Jons dreams waiting for him.
He never mentions how Jon used to joke about marrying him one day, a childish proposal sealed in a pinky promise while Damian rolled his eyes. He remembers the way Jon pecked his lips afterwards. The memories burn now.
Damian realised long ago that he is in love with Jon. He will tell him one day.
After some time, Lois encourages him to go back to school. When she sees how bored he is, she gets him placement tests, and when he tests out, she sets him up at an online university. He accomplishes degree after degree and starts to help Lois with her research. They take down several corrupt labs and corporations together.
Damian goes to med school after seeing how many die without proper care while working with Lois. Damian hopes that Jon will be proud of him for still saving people, even if it's different without him.
They all still search. They all still cry when they find nothing. They all still wait.
Then one day, Jonathan Kent returns.
The Watchtower picks him up, and Dick calls them as soon as it happens. Lois and Damian are home at the time and rush to the Zeta tube with a desperate speed.
Clark is already waiting for them when they arrive.
They walk, the three of them, on shaky legs, holding their breath.
When Damian opens the door, he can't believe his eyes.
"Jon."
The man turns, and Damian freezes, beside him Lois sobs.
He is taller, Damian, despite his growth spurt still has to look up at him. His hair is longer, his black curls almost in his eyes. He has lost his baby fat and instead grown broader and more defined. There is a scar on his jaw and Damian dreads to think how he got it. His eyes, though, are the same bright blue, tired and heavy as they look.
Clark and Lois embrace their son falling to their knees, but Damian stays back until they are done.
Jon hugs his parents tightly, and when they come back to reality, Lois whispers in his ear too softly for Damian to hear, but Clark smiles at them and turns to look at Damian.
Then, Jon breaks the hug and walks towards him.
"Damian." He says as he reaches for him, voice so full of emotion that Damian wants to cry.
"Is it you? Is it really you, habibi?"
"I'm not the same as I was, I don't think I could ever be. With everything I've seen and everything I've done." Jon starts hesitantly.
"I killed, I hurt people, I tricked, I manipulated, I did everything I could to come back home, to come back to you." He admits. Jon looks away in shame, and Damian can't bear it. "I'm not what you were expecting."
He closes the distance and grabs Jons face.
"I don't care!"
"But-"
"No, you remember what you promised me?!" Damian demands.
"Of course! That we'd be heroes together."
"And?"
Jon blushes. "And that I'd build you a farm, give you a safe place to come home to." He swallows nervously, "That I would marry you one day."
Damian smiles so wide, uncaring of the tears running down his face. "I have waited for six years in your house, on our farm for my future husband."
Jon gasps, but Damian continues.
"I love you, Jonathan Kent, I don't care what you have done or will do. I don't care if you're different, grown, or anything else. You are mine."
Damian takes a breath and stares into his eyes. "In this life and the next, I will always wait for you. I dont care how long or what you had to do. You came back to me, and that is all that is important."
Jonathan closes the distance between them and kisses him, pouring passion, desperation, and astonishing love into it.
When he draws back, he whispers against his lips desperately, "Always, my love. I love you, I love you so much. I will do anything to bring me back to you, oh god. Damian."
Damian feels something unwind in his chest and pulls Jon closer still. They'd never let go of each other again. Here, in Jon's arms, Damian felt whole for the first time in years.
"I missed you every moment," Jon says finally.
"Me too."
#damian wayne#jondami#batfamily#batman#supersons#jon kent#batfam#lois lane#clark kent#damijon#bruce is not great here#he gets better#epic has had me in a chokehold for months
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Idk how much of these ur planning to explore outright in the fic since we haven’t really had dans pov at all so I’m gonna ask some questions I’ve been really wondering about and would love to hear ur thoughts on
1) is he the kind of alpha who wants pups pretty soon? Or is it like with lex, where it’s something he’d like but didn’t really consider it to be in the cards for him because of his past
2) does he have any particular insecurities that have been affecting the specific choices he’s been making when it comes to lex and this situation? I’d love to hear a bit more of the reasoning behind his personal goals here. I know he’s chill and and ready to handle anything he’s needed for by someone he cares about, but it’s so interesting that he became committed to caring about lex so quickly, and I think that says a lot about the kind of person he is in the idea of “needing to be needed” or needing to have some important task to focus on in order to be fulfilled.
3) is he a lifelong gothamite, or does he originate from metropolis or somewhere else?
4) did he have any expectations for who this mysterious pack he was helping lex to protect are? Was he thinking about a really young pup and that’s why he was so ready to help? Does he have any sort of internal “what the hell” when he realizes the “pup” is actually very clearly a grown adult, and of course he doesn’t really have the context or understanding yet of who Jason is or the ways he was “stunted” by his life.
5) does he like vigilantes and hero’s at all? Was his goon/Merc lifestyle simply because it was something he was good at, or did he have some other particular interest that got him into that field.
I don’t expect you to answer all of these I just had some questions I’d love to hear your thoughts on if you have time!
I think he wasn't against the idea but it didn't come up until now as a possibility. He's a bit of a wilder alpha so I think deep down in his instincts he really wanted an omega who could keep up with him to have pups with. Lex makes Dan keep up with him so that helps.
He's very deferential to the existing pack hierarchy and admires it. We see this several times with him - he respects Clark's boundaries as Pack Alpha, he doesn't go into territory he's not invited onto, etc. He respects that Lex belongs to the Pack before Dan has any claim on him. I think an insecurity for him will be accepting that he has a place in that hierarchy and didn't just barge his way in. He's a bit of a solo alpha but deep down I think he really likes the older fashioned Pack dynamics. He never imagined settling down with just a mate, a house, and 1-2 pups. He does best when he's helping, and in the context of multiple alphas even. He doesn't need to be the top alpha in any situation, and maybe even deep down being in a pack is a relief for him because he doesn't want to be the one in charge setting rules all the time. He's a bit more independent than that.
Lifetime Gothamite, but my personal hc after some asks on here is that he did a brief stint in the military or some service organization where he traveled for a bit
He really respects Alfred ("Mr. Pennyworth") and was always under the assumption that his client was wealthy and private and that that was none of his business. Lex told him eventually that the pup was an adult but Dan still got it, that's the pack pup, it's different. He might be presented but he's still the youngest and the most vulnerable, esp as an omega. I think by this point in TNW he's put together who his client is (Bruce Wayne's pack) and that Clark is Superman (kind of hard not to after that rescue) but not the Batman part (yet).
I think Dan did some questionable jobs but mostly stayed out of that world. I like the Merc/former henchman idea but not sure it fits the main TNW storyline. Heroes and villains aren't his business, but we do see his disgust for Joker and anyone who helps him hurt people. He's got a strong sense of justice when it comes to protecting the vulnerable, like omegas and pups.
#asks#anon#dan the alpha#lex luthor#the ninth wave#a room full of coral#a/b/o mention#a/b/o tw#mpreg mention#mpreg tw#myfic#theresurrectionist
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The Reaper and the Self-Righteous Monarch’s First Condemnation - Chapter 2
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3
This event contains major spoilers for Victor’s route.
It was now around a month after I had first met Victor. After receiving an invitation from him, I arrived at a castle that was built on the royal palace grounds.
Victor: Think of this as our hideout. A secret base from where we fight evil with evil.
The lights of the chandeliers reflected off the polished floors, making the entire castle shine beautifully.
(Ironic for a secret base for evil.)
After I took his hand in the audience chamber that day, Victor said that we would need somewhere to work out of. He had his eye on an unused castle that lay within the palace grounds, and had spent the past month repurposing it for our needs.
Victor: A room has been prepared for you. Feel free to do as you like with it.
William: Are you staying here too?
Victor: There’s no shortage of rooms.
(What a non-answer.)
We walked down the corridors as Victor explained the castle’s rooms to me. A few servants caught my eye.
Victor: All the servants working here are deaf, so if you need to communicate with them, use sign language or writing.
William: I see.
(By hiring only deaf servants, it safeguards our secrets while also providing employment opportunities to them.)
This gave me a good idea of what Victor was like, both as a ruler, and as a man with things he needed to keep hidden.
Victor: And over here is the common room.
He opened the door, revealing a lounge. At his direction, I sat down on a couch and was handed a stack of documents.
Victor: It’s perhaps rather early, but it is now time to pay evil unto evil.
The documents contained information about a particular nobleman.
William: Robert Sullivan… He’s the son of that viscount, isn’t he?
Victor: Due to some issues with some scandals, he was unable to inherit the family business. After his younger brother inherited instead, he was left with nothing.
William: But surely he still had some inheritance at least.
Victor nodded and continued.
Victor: Over the past half year, he had been using said inheritance as capital to import a large number of goods from overseas. The shipments are all the same items.
Charcoal, potassium nitrate, sulfur… Ingredients used to make gunpowder.
Victor: Though his character is unfortunate, he does have some talent as an engineer. And he put that to use…
William: Creating new recipes for explosives.
Victor: Precisely.
William: I would think the military would be beside themselves over the chance to recruit him, if he’s as talented as you imply.
Victor: Unfortunately, that isn’t likely to be possible. He has chosen to offer his talents to a group of republicans.
I looked up in surprise, and Victor met my eyes with a wry smile.
Victor: The concept of an inherited right to rule exists only because of this country. Perhaps it would be for the best if the throne were overthrown. Victor: If I did that, I would gain legitimacy in the eyes of the people. It could change the world.
William: …If one’s desire for recognition and legitimacy starts leading them down the wrong path, it could lead to the country’s doom.
Ever since Queen Victoria took the throne, republicanism had only grown more extreme in the country. The Privy Council were nominally loyal to Her Majesty, but the nobles knelt to the queen while simultaneously scheming to undermine her. It was clear to me that there were very few people who truly served Her Majesty.
Victor: So tonight, we’re going to infiltrate the republicans’ stronghold!
William: Hold on. You’re the one they’re targeting. William: Why do we have to go together? I can handle it alone.
Victor: No, I’ll come along. What else do I have this identity as Victor for, if not to go out into the field? Victor: …And what’s more, as ruler, I hope that lives need not be lost unnecessarily.
He stood and extended his hand to me.
Victor: If we can convince them to settle things peacefully, that would be ideal.
(No matter what I say, I don’t think he’ll listen to me.)
I sighed and took his hand, using it to pull myself up.
William: If Her Majesty were to be killed, her loyal subjects would be at a loss. Please don’t do anything reckless.
Looking extremely pleased, Victor smiled.
-----
Just as midnight arrived, we found our way to the base where the republicans were staying. Along the way, we made casual conversation to get to know each other better, asking about how we spent our days and what foods we liked. We also discussed what we should name this organization, what we would be doing in the future, and our ideals. The conversation was entertaining. I found that we got along so well it was like we were old friends.
William: Now that I think about it, sometimes you swap back and forth between different ways of speaking.
Victor: …Oh, well. I used to speak a bit more pompously. But it’s more convenient for my cover to change how I speak. I can’t go around talking like a royal all the time. Victor: But you know how habits are hard to change. It slips out sometimes if I’m not careful.
[TL note: William was noticing that Victor swapped between using 僕 ‘boku’ and 俺 ‘ore’ for his first person pronoun.]
But then Victor laid his hand on a door handle, bringing an end to our conversation. The entire atmosphere changed.
Victor: Let’s go.
When we entered, the republicans were holding a gathering. Robert Sullivan was standing on a stage, giving a speech to the gathered crowd.
Robert: This bomb has twice the power of a conventional one!
As he held the bomb out for the crowd to admire, cheers broke out in the audience. We hid ourselves in the back of the seats, listening to the speech.
Robert: When the new day dawns, our revolution will begin!
Victor’s brow furrowed.
Robert: Bombs will rain down on the palace from every direction, setting the world aflame! Robert: And meanwhile, our courageous brothers lying in wait in the palace will stop at nothing to take the queen’s head, giving their lives up for the battle. Robert: …It may also be difficult for the ones launching the bombs to return alive.
There was silence for a moment, before Robert once again held up the bomb.
Robert: But in order to bring peace to this country, we must defeat the queen!
Republicans: Wooo!!
Victor: …I see.
As the crowd raised their swords in excitement, Victor closed his eyes. After letting out a quiet breath, he opened them again. When I met his eyes again, I saw that they were filled with determination.
Victor: …And what’s more, as ruler, I hope that lives need not be lost unnecessarily. Victor: If we can convince them to settle things peacefully, that would be ideal.
(Ah. So that’s it.)
Realizing what was going to happen, I stood.
Robert: Who the hell are you!?
William: It must be terribly lonely, to be a ruler.
Victor: William…?
William: You wish for people’s freedom and happiness more than anything else. And yet your hopes and feelings can’t reach them, their paths stray from yours, and the number of lives you cannot save only continues to increase.
Step by step, I approached the crowd.
William: You plan to kill the queen by sacrificing your lives. Will the future you envision bring you freedom?
I stopped walking when I had every member of the crowd in my field of vision.
William: Your master loves you so, no matter how deep your betrayal runs. But now, she no longer extends her hand to you.
That sigh of only a few seconds ago was Victor finally giving up on them. Victor had decided that he could not save them, and so closed his eyes to gather the strength to move forward.
Robert: Someone get him!
William: “Everyone, stay where you are.”
In an instant, everyone except Victor and I froze in place. I could see the crowd’s confused gaze darting here and there. As their expressions slowly morphed into fear, I turned towards Victor.
William: They plan to commit slaughter under the guise of justice. In my eyes, they are evil. William: But what do you think, Victor?
His cold eyes said everything for him.
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Ten years ago, I found a lamp.
It was a simple thing. No etchings, no jewels, just a small little brass lamp sitting at the back of a dusty antiques shop. Some deep, wordless curiosity tickled my mind and kept me fixated on it for a solid three minutes before I finally decided to purchase it.
Imagine my surprise when, after giving the thing a proper cleaning with a rag, a genie appeared before me. In that moment I believed I understood where that curiosity came from. This being, wrapped in silks and smoke, must have called to me.
And what a being they were. A smooth voice paired well with a charming smile to fixate me in a heartbeat. Beautiful felt like an understatement—ethereal came to mind. That was as far as my thoughts went before this being began to theatrically explain the deal of the lamp:
"You get three wishes, but there are rules. Rule number one," they began, raising a finger, "you can't wish for immortality. At best I can promise is that you'll live as long as I do, and frankly, I don't know how long a genie lives. I could die immediately upon granting your wishes. Something something magical rebirth to reset the magic after three if someone new doesn't call upon me first. Never did get the chance to ask my creator for clarification on that before they were run through. Anyway..."
The rest of the rules were straightforward enough after that. Upon completion of the spiel, the genie settled back into their smoke and fixed me with an expectant look. As I stared back, be it because a brief slip of the mask or my own intuition, I saw a glimpse of the soul. This being was stuck in the perpetual darkness of this lamp waiting to hear the heart's desires of another for centuries. I saw in that moment a loneliness reflected back at me that I recognized within myself.
I knew what my first wish would be, I declared, and stepped forward. The genie leaned in casually, arms crossed and awaiting my command. I hesitated at the closer proximity for a moment, swallowed, and then spoke my first wish.
The genie's eyebrow raised, very, very slowly.
"You're sure?" they asked. I nodded, and my wish was granted.
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"You know," my companion said around a mouthful of pizza, "when you made that first wish all those years ago, I worried you had some nefarious things in mind."
I glanced over from across the couch and raised a brow. They shrugged.
"No one has asked for my company before, let alone for ten years. And in the guise of a mortal at that. Can't complain when I get to enjoy this though." They then sighed contently around another bite of pizza.
I stared. It had only been a month, but my new roommate had settled in like this place had been their home for years already. They spent a millennia in a brass lamp—the object in question was tucked safely out of sight now—but now with the world truly at their disposal they wasted no time taking in all its "wonders", as they called them. The aged architecture of the corner of our building. The weeds fighting their way up through the cracks in the sidewalk on the way to the store. The taste of a slice of a frozen pizza brand. All these mundane things were a joy to behold for them, and witnessing those moments of joy were a joy for me too.
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"Halfway there."
I looked up from the opened cardboard box in front of me. They set down another one on the table, a little battered from the move but sturdy. Their eyes remained fixed on the box as they cut the tape to retrieve its contents.
"Five years as of today," they said, now glancing over at me. "Five more to go. I think it's gone pretty well so far myself. What do you think?"
I let the question sit for a moment. The space around me was warm and brimming with possibility. The contents of the box before me held memories of our journey so far. Some were sad, and some were angry, but without them the happy moments wouldn't feel as sweet upon reflection. Each wove a beautiful thread into our shared story as colorful as the silks my partner wore when we first met.
I wouldn't change a thing. I said so, and they smiled.
"Neither would I."
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The lamp sat on the table before both of us. Today was the ten year anniversary of the beginning of our journey. It felt surreal.
"I don't regret it," my love said, taking my hand. "In all the years I've existed in this world, none of them have ever been as precious to me as the ten I've shared with you. If you asked for ten more I wouldn't hesitate to grant them."
I squeezed their hand and smiled sadly. We had already talked about this countless times. This wish's boon was a temporary one, and another like it would be the same. I couldn't stomach the thought of forcing them to live alongside me as I aged, knowing that in the end they would return to their life of magical solitude once their mortal time was done.
So, for now, we simply decided to let the wish run its course. Their hand slipped from mine back to smoke as they returned to the lamp. I breathed in deep, and then reached out to rub it.
My genie appeared before me as they had ten years ago, ethereal in silks and smoke, and smiled a bittersweet smile down at me.
"You have two wishes left, but there are rules." They continued on into the first of their rules, but part way through I froze. They stopped, noticing, and waited. Hearing that first rule about immortality again brought back what they had said the first time. It was an offhand comment, a joke, but now I realized that it could be our solution.
I knew what my next wish would be. I took in a breath, and then spoke it forth: I wished to live as long as they did, however long that might be.
My genie stared down at me. There was no raised eyebrow this time, just a look of genuine surprise. "You're sure?"
I nodded.
"But...what if you decide to use your third wish? Or what if you lose the lamp and someone else calls on me?"
The answer to the first question would have been to simply never use the wish, but the second question gave me pause. I would have to be vigilant. There could be no mistake, because even a small one could mean the end of us both at the hands of another. I couldn't assume that would never happen, and that scared me more than anything. It was a risk neither of us could control.
But the third wish...that was something we could.
----------
My genie and I decided to postpone the second wish so we could talk it and the final wish over. We took three days, an irony neither of us missed at the end, to research and discuss and iron things out, and there were plenty of twists and turns through logic and emotion both. In the end, it came down to the simple fact that neither of us wanted to be parted.
My second wish would remain the same.
My third wish, in theory, would work. In theory.
I looked at my genie. They looked at me.
My wishes were granted.
----------
"I think this is my favorite iteration so far. Can we keep it this way for a while?"
I glance up from my book to see my genie inspecting a frankly gaudy looking little lamp now sitting on our living room table. It's covered in etchings and jewels, a far cry from the simple lamp I bought from that dusty antique shop all those years ago.
I raise an eyebrow, very, very slowly.
My genie sighs. "Fine. Come up with three more wishes then so we can see what it turns into next."
I roll my eyes and smile as I place my book on the couch next to me.
Ten years ago, I found a lamp. Since then, it has been reborn a number of times, and I have to admit, it's been fun to see what new form it takes after that three wish reset.
The best part? My genie and I have as long as we want to keep playing with it.
"Rule number one," said the genie, "you can't wish for immortality. At best I can promise is that you'll live as long as I do, and frankly, I don't know how long a genie lives. I could die immediately upon granting your wishes."
#don't ask where this came from it just did#i do not control the write#writing#short stories#short story#genie
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So much of SW fandom is always like ‘Anidala is so toxic blah blah’ and I’m over here screaming into the void that the reason they are tragic isn’t because they are ‘toxic’, it’s because they were actually perfectly suited for each other, perfectly suited to help the galaxy as the best versions of themselves, and perfectly suited to be the best and most loving parents to Luke and Leia…. but the circumstances of the tragedy they are trapped in didn’t allow it. The plot, ya know… Palpatine’s machinations, the Jedi Order’s participation in the Clone Wars, the Order and Senate's blindness to Palpatine’s role in it until it’s too late, Anakin’s fall to the dark side … THAT plot ???
Viewing Anidala’s relationship as inherently negative (either for themselves or for the galaxy) is missing a huge point of the story. The tragedy isn’t the fact that Anakin and Padme loved each other and were in a relationship together — if anything, I would argue that they were meant to be. They met as children, significantly before Anakin had joined the Order AND before he’d met Palpatine! So their bond and connection existed prior to Anakin's alignment with either the Jedi *or* the Sith, and thus should be read as transcending both. The tragedy is rather that their joy and happiness and their potential for a future as a family together were snatched away. Their relationship was used against them by someone who hated them both as individuals and wanted to enact his revenge upon them and upon the whole galaxy.
Anidala’s love was never the problem; it was always Fear of Loss, and the fact that love and family were forbidden. These factors allowed Sidious to exploit the situation.
Anakin and Padme are not supposed to be just some ‘regular couple who have problems’. (Nor are they supposed to be a pair of toxic 'freaks' as fandom seems to like to call them, either.) Sure, on one level they are very human characters and we love that about them, but on another level they occupy highly symbolic roles in the story. They are supposed to represent two sides of galactic rule that are meant to be in harmony, but which get torn apart because the galaxy itself is being torn apart.
They are the galaxy in microcosm.
This is a story that only makes sense if you understand the PT x OT to be one single entity, a completed saga, the ending of which is an uplifting one that vindicates Anakin and Padme’s forbidden love. A story that must be understood as portraying Luke and Leia as unequivocally heroic. A story that depicts Luke's success in redeeming his father as the fulfillment of Padme’s faith in Anakin’s goodness.
It’s not a story that works if a) you accept the Disney Sequels and other Disney post-RotJ/anti-Skywalker nonsense as canon , and b) you try to 'read' Anakin and Padme's relationship as you would a relationship from our ‘real world.’
Which brings me to another issue. Nowadays, it is becoming more popular to view Star Wars through the lens of political allegory, and while Star Wars absolutely *IS* a political story that contains many overt political elements, it's not SOLELY meant to function as a 1:1 comparison to our real world. It's still ultimately a created-myth. A greek tragedy paired with a fairytale. It's a larger-than-life story set in an old-fashioned space-opera setting ('a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away') with larger-than-life archetypal characters, and I’ll be screaming into the void until, maybe, just for once, the SW fandom learns to suspend disbelief and engage with Lucas Star Wars on its own terms, and understand it within the context of its own genre.
#anidala#union of opposites#prequels appreciation#across the stars#love and family#forbidden love#pt x ot#the skywalker saga#the real skywalker saga#i'm here for the mythic and spiritual aspects of SW first and foremost#if people are here for other things ....fair enough#but it's not MY star wars and i don't particularly find these real-world views of the characters to be all that compelling or interesting#there's plenty of straight up dystopian sci-fi that one can choose from#my Star Wars is much more than that#/shrug#star wars without mythopoesis is simply not star wars at all
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A lot of post-Empire Inheritance fics have the new Riders be an even distribution between the four races as if the dragons have a diversity quota, but I sorta think they would tend to prefer elves first, then Urgals and humans, with dwarven riders being the most uncommon because their natural dispositions just. don't. match. The evolvement of their race is very territory-specific; namely to the mountains and stones and the world within them - what we get of dwarven culture shows them as a very clan-oriented, closed off group of people. And while that's changing a bit under Orik's rule, it doesn't change the fact that they naturally prefer stones and caves and a set settlement surrounded by clan and kin instead of flying on a dragon all over with multi-raced companions. Orik is as progressive and open-minded as you can get but even he hates flying! So I'd think that amongst dwarves it would take a really unique, adventurous individual to attract - and in turn be happy with - the companionship of a dragon and life as its rider. Such dwarves would be anomalies (in a good way, but still unusal), not the norm for their people.
There'd be more elves b/c canonically I think it's said somewhere that most Riders were elves. Granted the humans were only added in later but the elves' shared history with the dragons and the initial legacy that ties their races together runs too deep; their magic and culture - and even state of being - is wholly intertwined with each other (dragons gave elves immortality, elves gave dragons speech, they literally made each other into what they are) so I'd like to think there's always going to be this natural affinity between them, like a sense of innate kinship. Or a more symbiotic evolvement relationship like that of clownfish and sea anemones.
Urgals are the most similar to dragons in nature - they're straightforward, value strength and hunting prowess, in tune with the land and nature and celebrate all of nature's harsher laws in their constant desire to fight, hunt, and win, but upon achieving that they're content with their lot in life. No intricate politics or bottomless ambitions. All nice and simple and visceral. Aligns with the dragons perfectly. They can be the perfect hunting partners and no dragon bonded with an Urgal would ever need to deal with the vegetarian crisis.
Also the dragon's going to have the best playmate growing up, they can wrestle together and butt horns
Humans are the most unpredictable. And varied. Scanning human minds would prolly be a lot like browsing ao3 tags, whatever niche trait the dragon embryo's looking for in a partner, there's bound to be a human who has it lol.
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Minnie, I was right.
This is, by far, one of my absolute favourite Nanami fics ever written, so much so that it took me two whole days to actually finish it because I was taking breaks to digest how marvelous each section was.
Every part of this fic was a love letter to Nanami (and his forearms, but I digress) and I feel like you single-handedly made me fall in love with his character all over again.
Right here is the deeply sensitive and observant side of him, the vulnerability even with undeniable strength, the underlying mischievous and deeply passionate man who you always manage to capture the essence of.
But before I continue with my general impressions, a more detailed look is called for. If I'm going to quote every line that was breathtakingly written, I'm going to quote half the story, so I'm going to exercise some restraint here, lol.
The opening scene and the return to this point in time in the last section was such a symbolic moment. It felt like the ring on her finger, such a small item, so precious, doubly so because of WHO had given it. It's a commitment that Nanami made, seemingly without even having to think about it at the furniture store, but the decision carries so much more weight with him. This is the culmination of events in a relationship, while simultaneously being the birth of so many new avenues for him and reader.
Yes, this is THE ode to Nanami's forearms that I've always dreamed of reading, but it's so much more than that. Through the appreciation of this aspect of him, you've fixed a lens through which we get to see all the best parts of his character.
We get to see the rule-abiding, stoic side of him at work, the canon-familiar dynamic with Ino and Gojo, but also a slow unfurling of a man. He reveals himself, layer by layer, through the way he does paperwork, the way he takes note of the reader's habits and mannerisms, the way he acknowledges his own burgeoning feelings and takes responsibility for them (as he WOULD), that slow, powerful, sweet pour of his honeyed existence into the vessel of your world. It's poetry. Pure poetry.
There's something so delightfully and earthily erotic about reader's obsession with his arms (I have never identified more strongly with a reader character, btw) but its always artfully offset by the way the complexity of her emotions surrounding it are conveyed.
It's an elaborate dance, a push and pull, dare I say, a form of courtship on its most primal level. As a male bird of paradise displays his feathers to gain the attention of the female, here Nanami, a man not given to ostentatious display at all, finds his own manner of mating call, and explores both their sexualities in a way that only strengthens and cements the bond of love and trust between them. This is truly a masterpiece of writing, and it shows in nuances like this.
The way reader is also portrayed as such a complex and subtle character is also amazing to me. She inhabits a unique sphere in his world without infringing on, or changing it. She fits into his reality, as he does in hers. There's this seamless transition between canon and what occurs in their relationship that must have taken so much craft to convey, but you truly made it look effortless.
The many little chronological incidents that you write chain into each other so well with those brushstrokes of lighter curiosity, building attraction, natural companionship, cut through with the deeper shades of lust, desire, longing and love that binds like sinew to bones.
Also, can I slow clap for the way Nanami uses his knowledge of her specific kink to draw out such an elaborate plan of seduction?? This is so HIM??? It's 100% something he would do, at least, in my head. In an almost scientific manner, he observes, hypothesizes, sets out his aim and objectives, tests them in numerous scenarios, observes her responses, notes them meticulously, and then applies them with all the precision of a Swedish-manufactured timepiece.
FUCK.
Minnie. I am WEAK for this man.
Can I also say that your prose is just stunning (always, but particularly in this piece). There were such subtle masterstrokes of allegory, metaphor and imagery throughout that I completely lost track of which were my favorites, because there were JUST TOO MANY.
I apologise for how disjointed this review is, but ALSO, there is a certain intimacy you always bring with your depiction of Nanami. He feels so real, like I could reach out and touch him, feel the fabric of his trousers under my fingers, map out the veins on his arms, smell the underlying natural scent of him, feel the warmth of his scalp where his undercut runs thinnest. It's your words that bring this almost visceral, tactile version of Nanami to life through writing, and there is something so incredibly powerful about that.
Another reader called you the "Nanami Queen" and I have to throw in my vote, because I've honestly read very, very few fics that bring him to life the way you've managed to. Nanami breathes, fights, struggles, loves, lusts, and lives through your words. He carves a firm place in the mind that can't be unseated by any other version of him, and that's a mark of raw talent, skill and power when it comes to writing.
The sex scene was utterly magnetic and breathless, a warm fog of passion, misted breath and marks in flesh. Your descriptions are so drenched in sensuality without ever resorting to or needing overt phrasing.
Like, honestly, when Nanami spreads fingers covered in her slick, when he licks it off, including the part on his arm, that BLEW the breath out of my lungs. The way you showcase the primacy of their passion while never losing the tempo of unbridled sex, while maintaining Nanami's character with such accuracy, while providing such a detailed, explicit, nuanced view of how he gives her exactly what she needs, is so incredibly depicted. I'm lost for words.
My final take away from this is that yes, this is a story about Nanami's exquisite forearms, but also a story about the slow blossoming of love between two people who express themselves in subtle ways, the building of not just a relationship, but an unshakable foundation of trust, of being another person's safe harbour and home, of the myriad small ways that love infiltrates your life before it's delicate form roots itself and grows into something vast and all-encompassing.
Nanami is a subtle man, a man who asserts his presence quietly, but with a gravitas and sense of purpose that sets him apart. He is a man who chases an elusive happiness, one he has almost resigned himself to never finding. He is a man who could love with such tenderness, humour, passion and intimacy.
You've held up a mirror to that man, literally, in the most erotic manner possible, but in doing so revealed the many facets of his character that make him so utterly devastating.
Thank you, Minnie, for this absolute masterpiece of Nanami fiction, one that will remain with me for as long as I read fanfic. I don't think I have the words to properly convey what I felt when reading this, but your writing makes me feel such raw emotion, such heightened sensations, such immersion in the fictional world, that I once again can only defer to you as someone who has the key that unlocks a specific door in my mind.
This is a Nanami fic for the hall of fame, as I predicted, and it will remain there for as long as people choose to bring him to life through fiction as special as this.

CW: mature themes, smut, MDNI Pairing: Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader Summary: It was such a soft radiance that highlighted the contours of his forearm, well-defined and solid—like someone who didn’t need to prove anything. When he picked up his pen, twirling it once in his fingers before he began tackling the preliminary portion of his report, Nanami did it effortlessly, as if all of this was nothing. Not knowing that to you, it would become everything. OR Five times you manage to stave off the urge to act upon your fascination with Nanami Kento's most alluring physical feature, and the one time you don't. Also on AO3
It really didn’t have to come to this.
It’s the first coherent thought that crosses your mind as you draw your legs up from where they slung off the sides of the low couch. You push against your feet, the cool leather a welcome relief against your heated skin as you scoot further up the smooth surface. The distinctive flick of the light switch reverberates down the hallway, and a faint glow illuminates the ceiling above you, bringing the skip-trowel texture composing it into focus. Your eyes follow where the light catches the amalgamation of ridges and valleys, as your breath finally evens down from its rapid rhythm.
The unique sound of a kitchen cupboard closing shut pulls you from your daze. The slow thud of approaching footsteps on polished hardwood follows it, resonating in the dim, quiet space. You close your eyes, take a deep breath, and you fail to stifle the soft chuckle that bubbles up within you, a laugh at your own expense as the absurdity of the situation washes over you.
Because it does dawn upon you now, the silliness of it all. All of this time, all of the mental energy poured into holding onto a secret with a declining half-life, only to have your efforts inevitably undone.
Only now, in the clarity granted by hindsight, does your mind flit to a memory as clear as day, back to several months prior, when the catalyzing encounter of the saga that eventually led to this moment that brought you to uncover a new facet of Nanami’s desires and to confront the particularities of your own.
“I don’t know, Ino… Maybe you should hold off on the more demanding missions for a bit. Isn’t this your third injury in just as many weeks?” you asked as you offered the younger sorcerer the energy bar you’d just unwrapped for him.
“And risk missing out on some field practice? Hell no!” Ino replied indignantly. “I’m only Grade 2 on paper, you know this. This is a minor setback, no big deal!” He tapped his cast for emphasis and nearly dropped the bar he’d seemingly forgot he was holding in the process, just barely catching it with his mouth before it fell to his lap. You could only shake your head as you watched the goofy scene unfold.
The past few weeks had seen a relentless surge of curse-related activity as the Tokyo metropolitan area entered what was typically its most hectic time of year. This time around, the busy season had resulted in every active sorcerer effectively forced to work on-call as they were assigned to successive missions which, more often than not, stretched the boundaries of their capabilities. You’d witnessed it yourself, as a Grade 2 instructor assigned to quite a few field missions that increasingly erred on the higher side of your experience level.
You’d had your start as an instructor at Jujutsu Tech at the same time Ino joined, first meeting at orientation, and over time, you’d grown to know and appreciate him like a younger brother. While his tenacity was usually admirable, it also worried you at times, particularly recently. He’d been pushing himself, even going as far as volunteering for the type of missions that would result in his current predicament: sitting in one of Shoko’s examination rooms with a broken arm freshly wrapped in a cast, awaiting his next round of RCT treatment.
“Besides,” he continued, “I was assigned with Nanami-san, and when I tell you that you would’ve loved to see him in action today,” he said, his tone tinged with a not-so-subtle playful lilt that did not escape you. “He kicked some serious fucking ass out there and I bet you would’ve—”
A heavy, exasperated sigh emanated from the entrance behind you.
“Ino, your energy would be better spent focusing on recalling facts rather than on the retelling of hyperbolic stories.”
The interjection came as a distinctively calm voice, one carrying a uniquely measured cadence, and did not require you to turn around to identify who it belonged to.
You shot Ino a warning look as you both watched Nanami Kento cross the few strides that took him to the opposing side of the infirmary bed. He dropped a thin stack of papers onto the examination room counter before his eyes met yours, a smile and a wordless greeting passing between you as his head slightly dipped in a respectful bow. You responded with a nod of your own, as you tried to mentally downplay the soothing wave of warmth that washed over you.
You were still slowly being acquainted with Nanami, who had recently made his return to the school, mostly via common interactions with his protégé, much like the one you were having now. Theirs was a bond you’d watched form and grow in real-time, largely thanks to Ino’s incessant updates.
But you’d also made observations of your own, taking notice of some unique and understated traits that only further piqued your curiosity about the man dubbed the 7:3 sorcerer.
As a teacher yourself, you’d been particularly sensitive to his affinity for mentorship with students and established sorcerers alike. They were the kind of observations that made you wonder about the specifics of what had made him leave in the first place, and even more curiously, about what had compelled him to return.
There was also something just so singular about how Nanami conducted himself. His was an even-tempered presence, bearing a quiet confidence that made him such a steady and welcome counterbalance to the otherwise frenetic atmosphere at the school. It simply made him such a pleasant person to be around, and lately, it was more often than not that you’d catch yourself, as you did in this moment, stealing fleeting glances at him as he draped the tan-colored suit jacket he’d been carrying over the examination chair before taking a seat.
“Pfft. What hyperbolics?” Ino’s mouth stretched into a wide grin as he turned away from Nanami and back towards you. “You truly should have seen it! Five hefty curses cornered Nanami-san, and he had to find a way to…”
And that’s when it first happened.
You’d glanced over just in time to catch sight of Nanami using his left hand to skillfully undo the cuff of his right sleeve, folding it neatly over itself until it reached his elbow, gradually revealing the perfectly toned arm underneath. By the time he was repeating the process on his other arm, the quiet precision of his movements and the hypnotic rhythm of controlled and focused intent had you completely spellbound.
Though innocuous in its practical purpose, the act held such an airy allure, one you thought couldn’t possibly be solely attributed to the overhead halogen lighting. It was such a soft radiance that highlighted the contours of his forearm, well-defined and solid, like someone who didn’t need to prove anything. When he picked up his pen, twirling it once in his fingers before he began tackling the preliminary portion of his report, Nanami did it effortlessly, as if all of this was nothing.
Not knowing that to you, it would become everything.
It hadn’t even registered with you yet at the time; the extent to which one too many furtive glances had been enough for a seed to take root in your heart, its insidious vines coiling around your unsuspecting mind.
“Hey, are you even listening?” Ino’s sudden, rambunctious voice, along with the lamenting intonation it carried, pulled you back to reality.
Only now did you realize that you’d decidedly relegated Ino’s voice to the background, prompting you to return your attention to him, but not before catching the fleeting upward curve of Nanami’s eyebrow along with the hint of curiosity discernible even through his near opaque lenses as he raised his head, his eyes meeting yours for the briefest of moments.
Agitation coursed through you by the time you turned to Ino, as you quickly processed the embarrassing fact that his loud comment might have exposed your moment of indiscreet inattention.
“I am listening, Ino, if only because you are speaking entirely too loudly for me to do otherwise,” you said, your words strained by the anxious tightening of your jaw.
You thought you’d detected a light scoff emanating from Nanami, so subtle, so nearly imperceptible that you wondered if you’d imagined it. You didn’t dare look his way to confirm it.
“Fine!” huffed Ino. “Then you can read about it in my report, just like everyone else! Oh, speaking of which, Nanami-san graciously offered to fill it in for me, you know, since my good arm is out of commission! Isn’t he the best?”
Nanami cleared his throat before intervening. “Ino, I’m rather keen on leaving on time today, so please, let’s focus on this?”
You took this as your cue to exit what could only become an increasingly compromising situation for you, keen on avoiding any further embarrassing displays of distraction.
“I’ll leave you two to it. I have an assignment of my own for which I should be preparing… Ino, please do the reasonable thing for once in your life and try to get some real rest, will you?”
You trained your eyes on the exit door as you headed towards it, determined to resist the urge to get distracted again, a flimsy plan that failed as soon as you realized where you’d left your phone.
On the counter.
Next to Nanami.
You took a deep breath to steady your nerves before you made your way around the bed and quietly retrieved your device from the counter, hoping that Nanami’s focus would remain on the report he was so diligently filling—a prayer that was only half fulfilled.
“Kawasaki City?” he asked, his voice coming unexpectedly, gently, and you were grateful that his eyes did not immediately leave his report, because you simply could not prevent yours from surreptitiously glancing over to catch one final glimpse at the hand that gripped his pen, at the way the light caught the fine hairs on his forearm.
You didn’t realize how long a silent pause had elapsed until Nanami halted his scribbling and lifted his head, curious eyes peering at you over the rims of his signature goggles. You quickly made a mental migration back to his question, your distracted mind only now registering that he was inquiring about your assignment.
“Ah yes, that’s the one… The zone’s been mostly cleared now, but they’ve assigned a small squad of us to do one final sweep before sending in the cleanup crew.”
“I see,” he said, pausing briefly. “Good luck, and be careful out there.” Sparse words heavy with sincerity.
“Thank you, Nanami.” Your reply came out meeker than you’d liked, something you cringed at internally before you grabbed your phone and finally shuffled towards the exit and out of the room.
“Ino—” Nanami started, eyes still on the door, warning already well-laced within those two syllables.
“Nanami-san. All due respect,” Ino cut in, not even pretending to attempt to conceal his self-satisfied grin, “but you’ve got to let me cook. Can’t you see I’m trying to talk you up? At this point, you’re just getting the way!” His lament was carelessly loud enough to be audible from the corner you’d just turned into the hall.
But hear it you did not, as you were too preoccupied with a conundrum of your own, the one consisting both of taming the small flame that had ignited within you and of fighting off the vivid imagery along with its significantly less tame derivatives that lingered and threatened to slink into your mind. The ones that would mark the first instances of perceiving Grade 1 sorcerer Nanami Kento in a decidedly different light.
Weeks later, the shortage of level-matched sorcerers required to meet the moment of this prolonged crisis remained persistent, resulting in teams and assignments being in a perpetual state of flux. Amidst this chaotic reshuffling, you found yourself paired with Nanami on a mission for the very first time. Some part of you briefly wondered which stars must have aligned to favor these auspicious circumstances before you decided against putting a question mark where fate had placed a period.
Today’s mission found you both on this sunny early afternoon, tasked with ridding a shrine of several cursed spirits who were intent on disrupting the area during its peak season and on terrorizing its poor visitors.
It was an assignment that quickly revealed itself to be a test of endurance rather than strength; numerous hordes of low-level curses had congregated around each of the seven entrances, six of which you’d spent the better part of the morning purging of their unwelcome intruders. In a bid to optimize energy and recovery, you’d suggested that you alternate turns exorcising the swarms, a strategy that now found the two of you hiding behind each of the two opposing pillars of the gate that marked the final entrance left to clear.
It was your turn to take on this next wave of curses, and by now, the searing soreness of strained muscles you’d rarely ever asked so much of had become difficult to ignore. Using the tip of the spear that comprised your cursed tool, you steadied yourself on shaky legs that you could almost hear screaming in protest, as you remained determined to conceal any sign of struggle and to see this final stretch through.
“Are you alright?” You heard Nanami call out from the opposing pillar, his tone edged with genuine concern.
God, this is embarrassing, you thought to yourself and could only nod at him, refusing to speak just yet for fear of betraying the shakiness in your voice, avoiding eye contact lest any evidence of your growing weariness become apparent.
Target focus, target focus, you repeated to yourself, like a mantra, as you steadied your trembling hands, turning your attention towards the horde of curses approaching on the horizon. If you could just manage to reach that first target, land that first blow, and chain it to activate your technique, the rest of the combat sequence would fall into place.
“Stay put, I’ve got this,” Nanami said as he suddenly left his post, crossing the distance between himself and the oncoming swarm in a few long strides before you could process, let alone protest what was happening.
You leaned onto your spear, repositioning yourself to face the sorcerer, just in time to watch him tighten his wrapped tie around his right hand and to witness the surge of cursed energy as it lit up his fist before he landed a decisive blow onto the first curse, staggering it and knocking it into the line of curses who’d blindly followed close behind. You watched as Nanami landed rapid, precise 7:3 blows with swift, successive slashes of his blade, only now realizing that this was your first earnest look at him in the heat of the battle.
And what a sight it was.
One right hook.
Two left slashes.
Repeat.
He set out with a slow rhythm, a cadenced dance of contained destruction and speedy precision. There was a controlled fury in his movements, a certain juxtaposition of sheer strength and disciplined composure, ridges of forearm muscles moving rhythmically as he landed one incisive blow after the other. As the density of the oncoming horde increased, so did Nanami’s tempo, so much so that for a brief moment, your fatigued eyes struggled to track his rapid movements.
The 7:3 sorcerer had decidedly entered a state of flow, seemingly unfazed by the volume of curses that threw themselves at him in a last-ditch effort to hold down the last fort of their invasion, forming the linchpin separating them from their assured demise.
Finally, it came down to the final three curses, far more imposing in stature than the previous, their presence heavy with the weight of their power, the apparent leaders of this enterprise.
All this appeared to be inconsequential to the indefatigable Nanami Kento, who unleashed a single, forceful blow that tore through all three curses at once, chopping them down right at their weak spot, thus putting an end to their onslaught, once and for all.
A tingling warmth flowed through you, easing some of the tension in your aching muscles, and you thought that maybe it was something beyond mere tiredness that accounted for this particular tremor traveling down your legs.
You trudged over to where Nanami stood, finding him still visibly recovering as he brought the back of his hand up to wipe his forehead, displacing the loose strands of his neatly disheveled hair. The sleeves of his cerulean shirt were pulled back, revealing a toned arm dotted with small beads of sweat, and accented by his signature watch, which gleamed as it caught the midday sunlight.
It suddenly occurred to you that you must have been staring when you caught a glint from Nanami's glasses as he shifted, and you watched as he scrutinized you, appearing to conduct a subtle but thorough assessment of his own.
“How are you holding up?” he asked, a light strain accompanying his words, his chest slightly heaving from exertion as he still caught his breath.
I should be the one asking you that, is what you wanted to reply.
“I’m completely fine… What about you?” you asked instead, attempting to ground yourself by counting the patterned spots adorning his tie, now only loosely coiled around his hand.
“Good,” his reply came laced with relief, as though a weight was lifted off his shoulders, and you felt his eyes linger on you for a brief moment before he followed up, “I’m fine as well.”
You found yourself nervously shifting your weight from foot to foot, each fidgety movement pushing the sharpened point of your spear to dig deeper into the cool grass as you hesitated in your next words.
“Thank you for taking on that last wave,” you said, still taking a trivial mental tally of black spots on yellow fabric. “You sure made light work of clearing them.”
A quiet twinge of self-consciousness rippled through you as soon as you uttered the words, and you winced internally as you silently hoped that they didn’t fall as flat with him as they sounded to you. You lifted your gaze, catching his for the brief moment it took him to turn his back to you, and you told yourself that you were imagining the faint flush that appeared to creep up his neck, just above his collar. You convinced yourself that the way he’d pressed his lips into a thin line was not a smile, nor even a suppressed iteration of one.
“It’s not a problem,” Nanami said over his shoulder. You watched curiously as he walked back the few steps that separated him from the spot where the discombobulated remains of the final three curses still lay. He knelt down to pick up what appeared to be an object dropped by one of the large curses, before he began to make his way back to you, his gaze still not quite returning to you.
“The truth is,” he continued, “I wouldn’t have been able to conserve this much energy had you not handled the previous waves as effectively as you did.”
Surely, these were but the polite words of a Grade 1 sorcerer towards his Grade 2 colleague.
Surely, it was the nebulous product of a tired and overactive imagination, and not an undercurrent of timidity you were detecting in his voice.
And surely, you’d tell yourself later, as you’d replay this interaction in your mind, it was the adrenaline propelling you in the moment, driving your unusual urge to keep a conversation going.
“Still, Nanami…” you chirped, feigning a confidence you did not yet feel you had, “At the risk of employing Ino’s terms, you did sort of hard carry me at the end there…”
This earned you a small scoff from the stoic sorcerer, a tiny but remarkable crack in his otherwise guarded demeanor, a pleasant surprise.
“Absolutely not,” he said before finally meeting your gaze from beyond his tinted lenses. “It was a team effort, and we made a good team.”
“Eh, I don’t know…” you replied, averting your gaze with a non-committal hum.
“You don’t know if we make a good team?”
You threw a glance his way, and this time, the tiny amused lift of his lips was unmistakable.
“No, yeah, I think we do,” you replied as nonchalantly as you possibly could.
“Good. I think so too.”
Surely, there was no deeper significance to this.
Regardless, he’d completely disarmed you of the remnants of your unperturbed veneer, and you found yourself mirroring his smile, not that you could even help it if you’d wanted to, not after he punctuated his statement with such a natural utterance of your name.
As you fought the urge to break the connection of his gaze and to hide from the unexpected vulnerability it was drawing from you, you steadied yourself by bringing your second hand to the worn wood of your spear, its familiar texture a slight comfort against the nervous tremor in your grip, further digging and it into the soft dirt surface of the ground. It crossed your mind that at this rate, you just might find the planet’s core before this conversation ended.
Nanami held up the object he’d just picked up, revealing it to be a small wooden placard.
“We should return this where it belongs,” he said, thankfully moving on from the suspended moment. “I believe I recall which gate had its signage missing.”
As you descended the shrine’s sloping grounds, the crunch of the gravel path underfoot sounded a soothing rhythm to an easier, more natural conversation as you recapped the mission’s events thus far. Nanami’s memory proved to be correct, so you both stopped before a small gate by an off-beat path right by the third main entrance, one which notably had a bare signpost.
You watched intently, captured by the quiet precision of his movements as he meticulously reattached the placard to the side of the gate, and you couldn’t help but marvel at the duality demonstrated within the time span of a single mission; the handiwork of hands that were dispensing righteous destruction a few minutes ago, now engaged in an authentic act of restoration.
Nanami backed up after having completed this endeavor, and only then were you able to make out the aged inscription on the wooden placard:
Destiny’s Path
Much like at the moment you were assigned to this mission, with this partner, your mind flitted to the notion of fate’s inescapable decree.
Several months separated you from that first joint mission, and you and Nanami now found yourselves engaged in an exercise that was as experimental and intimate as your blooming relationship.
“Alright, so the cabbage into eight wedges first and then cut each of those in half, the sweet potato and carrots cut into one-inch chunks, and then for the okra, you can just sever the stems.” You instructed, as you carefully placed a kitchen knife into his hand, handle first.
“Yes, chef,” he replied solemnly, a mirthful smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
It was his spirited refrain, one he’d now delivered for the third time this evening, earning him yet another snicker from you. Though it was his kitchen you were occupying, he’d gladly adopted the role of sous-chef for the night.
A comfortable silence hung in the air for a moment, and the reality of the situation settled. A Friday evening in Nanami’s apartment, the rich aroma of onions and bell peppers melding with sautéed beef in a pan wafting through the kitchen along with a tomato and cayenne broth simmering in a stockpot. It comprised the beginning of a savory West African peanut stew recipe you’d committed to share with him some weeks ago, a promise Nanami was now holding you to via a rather impromptu dinner night. An array of emotions swirled and commingled within you; a blend of nervousness and elation, of novelty and familiarity.
There was no label, none that you knew of at least, for the melding of your identities through a cultural dish whose preparation you knew like the back of your hand, and yet felt like you were learning for the first time all over again. You’ve tried to articulate the simplicity with which Nanami welcomed you into his space, to put into words the inexplicable but deeply satisfying sense of belonging that he instilled within you through acts like this one.
Underlying all this was a certain permissiveness to allow yourselves to drop the formalities imposed by the limitations of the workplace, of getting a glimpse into the reserved sorcerer in a rare, relaxed form, into undiscovered shades in his voice, and into an utterly understated playfulness that you were quick find both endlessly surprising and positively delightful. It truly was a nameless sentiment, something of a catalytic blur, a steady whisper in the background of shared breaths and of casual touches.
It was almost dizzying.
But not as dizzying as watching Nanami pull back the sleeves of the black polo shirt he’d changed into in two swift movements, leaving you no time to prepare nor to brace yourself against being unexpectedly faced with his exposed forearms.
Your breath slightly hitched at the sight.
In theory, your simmering broth, along with the meticulous process of sautéing your beef chunks with the bell peppers and onions you’d just added to your pan, should have sufficed to keep your attention.
In practice, the steady and rhythmic sound of Nanami’s knife striking wood only underscored what you could only imagine being an unmatched display of dexterity and an effortless masterclass in precision as he worked right beside you, each audible cut drawing you, enticing you to take a peek.
Just checking on his progress was how you’d shamelessly rationalize it in your mind.
So here you were, inconspicuously shifting your gaze over to his cutting board and, just as expected, your eyes fell upon a riveting sight. You caught the edge of your lower lip, observing Nanami’s slender, nimble fingers as he guided the knife over the firm yet yielding raw sweet potato, which, in turn, offered a slight resistance at each slicing movement, causing the muscles in his forearm to flex and his veins to ripple beneath his skin like tiny, pulsing rivers.
Those glorious veins.
How much time had elapsed as you watched, mesmerized by the way they disappeared and reemerged under the surface of his skin? What stopped you, really, from grabbing his arm right then and there, from tracing the constellation of every single vein that ran down from his fingers to the taut skin above his wrist, right down to where the fabric of his rolled-up sleeve bunched up on his forearm? All you’d know for sure was that after a while, Nanami paused mid-slice and glanced at you.
“I’m not doing this wrong, am I?” he asked, in a tone carrying an undercurrent of genuine concern.
“What? Yes. Ah, no. I mean, you’re doing great, don’t stop.”
It was a stammered reply, delivered almost too quickly, definitely too loudly. You turned back to your task at hand, the stove’s once comforting warmth now only serving to intensify the heat crawling up your neck and rising towards your flustered face.
You felt Nanami’s gaze linger on you for a bit before he resumed, his movements now slightly slower and carrying a renewed diligence. For a moment, you felt small a pang of guilt at the thought of having potentially planted a seed of doubt in his mind as a result of your shameless ogling, a sentiment that quickly faded away after he cut the last of the sweet potato, slightly shifting his angle, granting you an even clearer, more direct view of his effort as he took on slicing the carrots. Those offered less resistance, so when he started once again, it was in a brisker rhythm, each motion, each accompanying sound a note in the sinewy symphony of movement before you, capturing your full attention. There was no denying it now.
This was decidedly a thing.
Nanami finally threw a sidelong glance in your direction, and this time, you were sure that he’d caught you red-handed; you couldn’t even pretend to be subtle anymore, and you fully expected him to finally call you out on your staring when your eyes met and he spoke again.
“So is it wood then?” he said, a statement more than a question, breaking neither his gaze nor his rhythm as he continued to chop the vegetables.
His seemingly random question juxtaposed with his casual demeanor had completely thrown you for a loop. For the few seconds you tried to decipher it, your mind was in a bit of a whirlwind, and you briefly thought that perhaps it had finally happened, that you’d finally lost your mind, that you were far enough gone that you were now hallucinating and hearing nonsense.
“I’m sorry… Wood?” you asked, completely puzzled.
“Your secret ingredient for this dish? I’m assuming that’s what that’s about,” he said as he gestured his head towards the stove, bringing your attention to the wooden spoon you’d distractedly long since let slip out of your fingers and fall into the stockpot, nearly fully submerged in the broth.
“Ha. Very funny,” you said, trying and failing to suppress a snicker at just how ridiculous this situation, and the circumstances that led to it, were. “You should be minding your carrots, sir.”
You reached for the tip of the spoon that was still accessible and carefully tried to pinch it at an angle that would spare your fingers from being burned on the edge of the red-hot pot.
“Yes, chef,” Nanami’s voice broke the tense silence just as you were about to retrieve the spoon, and something about the comedic delayed timing of his response sent you over the edge as you let the chortle you didn’t realize you’d been desperately holding escape your lips, along with a sudden movement that only served to push the distressed spoon to slide deeper into the pot.
“Damn it, look at what you’ve done!” you cried out, your giggles betraying your attempt to mask your amusement.
Nanami chuckled as he reached his arm over, muscles flexing with the extension, coming to the rescue just in time to grab the tip of the spoon’s handle by the last few millimetres that remained safe. Just as he expertly brought the spoon into the adjoining sink for rinsing, a sharp exhale escaped him, transfiguring into an earnest burst of laughter, rich and unrestrained.
“I’m glad my troubles, which you caused, by the way, amuse you so much.” You brought a hand to your face, partly to cover what was now decidedly a shared laughter between you two, partly to conceal the embarrassment you felt about what your indiscretion had brought you.
“Thanks,” you said sheepishly when he handed you the now clean spoon, before adding with caution, “I know you want to, don’t say it again.”
“You’re welcome,” he replied with a smirk and a rising intonation as he resumed cutting the vegetables, an anticipated implication that he would defy your request.
You told yourself that there would be ample time later, for entertaining the colorful thoughts that permeated as a low hum in the background of your mind for the remainder of that evening, as you stole more subtle glances at him throughout the rest of your dinner prep, as you later chatted away over a successfully prepared meal. That you’d admonish yourself later tonight, for engaging in the all too tempting mental exercise of imagining other uses for Nanami’s arms, and for relishing in the creative results this yielded.
Slipping.
The threadbare mask you’d painstakingly managed to keep up thus far was now slipping.
The closing weeks of the first term of the new school year found you firmly ensconced in what was now a deepening romantic relationship with Nanami. By now, you’d long since stowed it neatly at the back of your mind; the notion that each passing day only inched you closer to that future, inevitable moment when you would be pushed to confront whatever consequences would come out of the sweet release of disclosure.
An inflection point would precede all this, however — a pivotal moment you would only pinpoint in retrospect, arriving on a late July afternoon marked by a suffocating heatwave.
The beads of sweat were finally beginning to cool on your forehead as the minutes ticked by. The small fan Nanami had placed on the coffee table before you a few minutes prior served as a scant but much-appreciated last defence against the thick, humid air, which had long since frizzed the edges of your once-sleek, silk-pressed hair.
About half an hour had passed since you’d both languidly stumbled into this unused office, desperately seeking refuge within what was seemingly the sole room in this building benefitting from a window that did not directly face the scorching midday sun, an oasis in a school building whose air conditioning had fallen to the whims of Murphy’s Law and had ceased to function during the city’s warmest week on record.
Nanami sat at the desk toiling away at some mission report while you were slumped on the adjacent couch, tackling a lesson plan, each of you battling on different fronts of the same war against the heavy, humid air.
The usually lively post-lunchtime coworking session you’d both been looking forward to had thus taken a sluggish tenor as you tried to focus on each of your tasks while holding onto the last bit of sanity amidst these terrible conditions that were anything but workable.
You’d swapped the hot tea you’d normally share at this time with a much less optimal cold drink that wound up being more ice than coffee, and instead of the usual buzz of conversation often consisting of Nanami delivering his scathing commentary on the latest episode of the new baking reality show you’d both been watching in tandem, a quiet stillness descended on you, only intermittently interrupted either by a sigh, the clacking sound of his keyboard, or the scribbling sound of your pen gliding across your tablet.
Out the cracked window, the cheerful chatter of some students who had gathered outside around some cold refreshments could be heard, and you wished you could emulate a fraction of their eager energy.
Only once the pen you’d been holding flew out of your hand, bouncing past your feet and rolling down somewhere under the couch, did you realize that you’d been absentmindedly tapping it against your knee in your fidgety distraction, its unceremonious clattering sound pulling you out of your contemplation.
You bent down and lazily padded the area just underneath the couch, first with your foot, then with your fingers, but they came up empty, finding only the ridged hardwood floor.
“Ah, shit,” you muttered under your breath. Now was not the time for this.
A very irrational reevaluation of the merits of completing a lesson plan in time for said lesson began to creep into your thoughts, and just as you began to contemplate abandoning ship for the day, Nanami calmly rose from his seat and made his way towards you, having observed the entire debacle out of the corner of his eye.
“This damn pen…” you bemoaned as you padded the same area over and over again, as though it would magically materialize after the umpteenth pass.
“I’ll get it,” Nanami said coolly as he crouched by you, right in the cramped space separating the coffee table from the couch that seated you.
You lifted your head, and it was in this newfound proximity that you took in just how much his tone contrasted with his demeanor, and how affected he was by these sweltering conditions.
It was evidenced in the way his disheveled hair clung onto his sweaty forehead, his tie off and draped over his shoulders, in the way the first two buttons of his shirt were undone, exposing his gleaming collarbone and in the haphazard manner by which his sleeves were pushed back to his elbows, wrinkled and uneven. It had you wondering whether it was just you or if this heat wave somehow managed to melt away a certain poise Nanami usually carried, giving him a rugged, slightly more cavalier allure that even you found to be rather novel.
It crossed your mind that perhaps it was a different kind of heat, one that had little to do with the weather that held dominion over these wandering thoughts.
Nanami brought his knuckles to the floor, extending his legs behind him and holding his body straight and taut as he flexed his arms, lowering himself in a controlled movement before dipping his head to glance underneath the couch. He reached one hand just by your right foot, while expertly hovering his chest just a couple of inches above the floor. The subtle bulging of his muscles beneath his shirt as they tensed certainly did not escape you.
Your eyes flicked first to the pen Nanami was now handing you, then back to his face, where you found a nearly imperceptible air of contentment and the beginnings of an amused smile. A silent testament, you thought, to his successful little expedition.
“Lifesaver,” you said, returning his smile. “My students get to have a class tomorrow, thanks to you.” Your attempt at feigning a relaxed demeanor held, until, that is, your fingers brushed against his as you took the pen, and you tried to suppress the involuntary hitch in your breath at the contact.
Get it together, girl, you thought to yourself, as you watched Nanami bring his hand to the floor, still without a word, expecting him to return to his seat.
Instead, with a measured exhale, Nanami lowered himself back towards the ground.
“I can feel it, you know…” When he finally spoke, it was barely audible over the buzzing fan, addressing the floor more than you.
“Hmm?” you said as you cautiously glanced down towards him.
“The tension.” He concluded his sentence, his voice even, low in tone yet loud in the relative silence. He held the position, his body a straight line from shoulders to toes, arms at a near-perfect right angle. His eyes kept straight ahead, and you could’ve sworn that it was only once your eyes traced over his arms, sparse hairs smoothened by the glistening sweat, that he finally extended them, raising himself in a smooth movement with a light grunt as he exhaled.
You felt your chest tighten.
“What tension?” you asked, unsure why you were murmuring, fairly sure that you should be bracing to hear whatever he had to say next.
“One,” he let out, his voice a low rumble, tilting his head up and peering at you through the blonde strands of hair that now fell over his eyes, holding your gaze just long enough for it to be noticeable, before his arms bent again, exerting muscles that revealed a striking pattern stretched over clearly defined veins. He lowered himself once more and pushed back up, a swift movement this time.
“Two,” he spoke again as he lowered himself into what was now clearly yet another push-up.
Amid this unbearable heat and out of seemingly nowhere, Nanami Kento had broken into some damn push ups.
“The tension. In my neck, through my shoulders, down to my lower back. That chair is stiff, less than ergonomic. And sitting in it all day…” he trailed off, his eyes lingering on you before he counted again.
“Three.”
Despite the now unmistakable smirk stretching Nanami’s lips, his tone was deceptively even, holding a rough rasp devoid of any strain, and it went straight to your core, trickling as a tingle down between your legs as your throat suddenly went tight and dry.
“Sitting in it all day…” he started again, picking up where he left off. “Something about the stretch of this exercise brings me so much relief.”
Nanami returned his focus to the space on the floor, right between his palms, allowing you the opportunity to keenly observe him. By now, he’d slipped into a fluid rhythm, each push upwards, each descent executed with control. His breathing was audibly rhythmic, quick exhales as he pumped his arms taut, muscles shifting as they flexed. He made the whole thing look so effortless, so damn hot.
You mentally clung to the justification that you were truly defenceless with your eyes here, on Nanami, on his flexing arms but your mind decidedly elsewhere, faced with your traitorous mind and the trips your it took down memory lane, back to other occasions during which you’d witnessed Nanami engaged in a similar exercise in a much different context, echoes from moments of shared passion past. You tried to defend yourself; it wasn’t your fault if, suddenly, momentarily, it became the most rational idea in the world to join him on this office floor and to slide yourself just under him. That if you were quiet enough, perhaps you could avoid being heard over the whirring sound of this fan, fluting up in the air and traveling out the ajar door and window, and—
That train of thought sent a jolting awareness of your surroundings, of your location, surging you back to reason.
“Sixteen,” you heard Nanami’s voice reemerging to the forefront of your mind.
You straightened your spine, pushing the capped end of your pen into your thigh in a misplaced attempt to maintain what little grip you had remaining on yourself and to find your footing, refusing to concede defeat to this dangerous game he had instigated.
“Nanami-san,” you started, the formal addition of the honorific to his surname eliciting a light chuckle that settled into further reinvigoration as he rose again, his muscles scrumptiously straining with push-up number God-knows-what as he picked up the pace. “I don’t know if the heat finally got to your head, or if this is your very roundabout way of asking for a massage or what, but you are doing entirely too much and I should—”
“Did someone say massage?”
A familiar, boisterous voice rang in the tense silence, causing you to jump in your seat and prompting Nanami to snap his head up towards the door. “I heard—Woah, you two are living good in here! Why are you gatekeeping the cool room?”
“Gojo, have you ever heard of knocking?” Nanami said, his tone finding a level of acerbity that was even further pronounced than the one he typically addressed him with.
“So mean to your favorite senpai, Nanamin… Besides, door’s wide open, and you don't seem to be busy working, so it’s fair game, right?” He looked to you for a confirmation you were still far too shaken to give, even if you’d wanted to humor him.
Gojo appeared to be the least affected by the heat wave out of everyone. He’d maintained his usual energetic demeanor, which he displayed now by shamelessly waltzing into the office like he personally owned it. “Oh, hey… Where the hell did you find a fan?”
Nanami let out an audible sigh that sounded more like a groan, rising from what would be his final push-up for now into a kneeling position before getting back on his feet. For what felt like the first time in forever, you could finally feel yourself breathe again, Gojo’s interruption having managed to defuse the dangerously charged energy that almost had you willing to risk it all. Only when the heat made a resurgence to the forefront of your mind did you realize just how dangerously dulled your senses had been rendered.
“Nanamiiiin, I’m so good at massages. Relax and let me give you one…” Gojo said as he extended his arms forward and wiggled them towards a defenceless Nanami.
“Absolutely not,” Nanami said firmly, backing up towards where you were still seated on the couch, only cornering himself and you in the process.
You scooted aside on the two-seater, grabbing your tablet in one hand and gently pulling on Nanami’s arm with the other, enacting your spontaneous plan for a quick escape.
“Come on, Nanamin,” you crooned, using the sobriquet Gojo relentlessly employed. “You were just complaining about the tension, right? Gojo barely seems to feel the heat, and he’s far stronger than me. I’m sure he’ll do a better job than I could ever dream.”
A few swift movements and you’d maneuvered up from the sofa, and stood behind the desk, decidedly flipping the positions you and Nanami had taken for the afternoon.
“She is so right!” Gojo explained, only further reinvigorated by your endorsement. “Sit back, Nanami! It will be my honor to take care of my bestie!”
You kept your gaze on Nanami as he fixed you through narrowed eyes that telegraphed the quiet wrath he had for you for this transgression, for the ultimate act of betrayal it was to inflict Gojo Satoru upon him, a man for with virtually no concept of personal space, on an unbearably humid day like today, no less.
Under different circumstances, you would feel a tiny twinge of guilt for pulling a gambit like this; alas, Nanami had chosen his game, and you’d chosen yours in turn, one that just so happened to involve the exploitation of the godsend that was a classic and chaotic Gojo-induced distraction. So instead, you snickered in your corner as you watched the white-haired menace slide himself behind Nanami and unnecessarily wrap his arms around his chest, eliciting a visceral swat of a hand, along with a cautionary “Don’t” from his visibly irritated counterpart.
You caught Kento’s eye and met his challenging look with a smirk not unlike the one plastered on his face not two minutes ago, when he’d subtly yet relentlessly teased you.
Would there be hell to be paid later? Probably. But for now, you could at least slip away while the two former schoolmates bickered. Now you thought that perhaps joining the students in partaking in refreshments wouldn’t be such a bad idea. You could use a chance to cool off.
And to stop yourself from slipping any further.
If your so-called mask had been hanging on by a thread, it was not in a single moment, but gradually, over the months which followed, that it completely chipped away, much like driftwood being nudged away from the shore by the lapping of gentle waves.
As you and Kento spent more time together, you both grew more comfortable around one another, becoming more honest and comfortable, and gradually uncovering each other’s strengths and flaws, preferences and aversions, virtues and vices with an acceptance that felt natural and easy.
Your bond had strengthened by now, having long since crossed the line delineating work from life partners, and you were now bound by a promise to make the ultimate promise to one another.
In between these deeper, candid moments, smaller revelations emerged: the subtle ticks and habits, the unintentional mannerisms and underlying drives, the little unspoken details that were concomitant with a blossoming courtship. Suffice it to say that you’d inevitably shared your predilection for Kento’s arms in many ways, some less subtle than others.
On one such occasion, it had slipped out a confession concealed in a question, one day as you were having breakfast together. After some light prodding from your part, Nanami finally relented and gave you an answer other than “everything” when you’d playfully asked him what his favorite feature of yours was; “fingerprints of joy” was the exact term he’d used as a simple yet touching description of your dimples whenever you’d smile, an answer that made you seriously consider tempering your response once he’d inevitably flip the question back to you.
Tried as you might, you ended up being significantly less civil than he was, “my favorite necklace” being one of the bolder terms you’d not-so-facetiously employed, contrasting the softer, playful drag of your finger over his bicep.
The comfortable rapport that had settled between you was not one you took for granted; it was one of the few wherein you could simply be yourself and not have it be “too much”; it was the same intimacy that unveiled the tormenting tease beneath Kento’s surface. And there was an inimitable joy derived from appreciating the man that you loved, warm fuzzies associated with making him blush, or smile, or laugh, whenever you flipped the usual script and when it was you who placed him in the crosshairs of your playful provocation, for once.
By now, you were reasonably convinced that the storm had sufficiently passed, and you figured you could breathe easier, relieved that the passage of time, along with a normalized exposure to Nanami Kento, had successfully dulled the more ardent manifestations of your fixation with your favorite physical trait of his.
What you certainly did not expect was for what you would only later understand to be a dormant force to re-surge with a furious vengeance in the early hours of the morning during a quick weekend getaway.
It was a trip you’d secretly planned in a relatively short time, fueled largely by an experience you’d had one evening just a few days prior, when your fiancé had returned home exhausted after a tough mission closing out a gruelling multi-week assignment.
Though you weren’t unused to the physically and emotionally taxing nature of your duties, you’d hated what you’d seen that night, in the culmination of weeks of relentless work with no break. Reserved as he was, Nanami was not infallible. You’d grown to know him very well by now, more than anyone else; you’d immediately detected the telltale signs of exhaustion, made apparent in his tone, devoid of its usual edge, and in the weariness etched on his face, and perhaps more evidently, in the way that he’d completely crashed as soon as he’d dragged himself out of the quick shower he’d barely managed to stay awake to take. He was burning out, long overdue for a break.
That night, you stayed up in the early hours of the morning, concocting your plan.
You’d worked through most of the night to pull as many strings as a Grade 2 sorcerer ostensibly could, drafting messages aimed to cash in on the decent amount of goodwill you’d garnered amongst your colleagues over the past few years. Ultimately, however, what truly helped you bring this endeavor over the finish line was leveraging your connection to one of the owners of a top-of-the-line, nearly always sold-out kikufuku shop, in conjunction with what was now a burgeoning friendship with Gojo. Although, in retrospect, you suspected that the fellow teacher would have settled for having any involvement with a plan of keeping a secret from Nanami as being adequate compensation.
By the time you’d clocked out on the following day, you’d managed the impressive feat of securing some overlapping time off for Nanami and yourself, and of successfully planning a short couple’s getaway.
A few days later, the fruits of your labor surfaced in the form of a considerably more tranquil version of Nanami.
Today was already the final day of what now felt like too short of a trip, and having opted to sleep in on the two mornings prior, you’d both made it a point to wake up early in order to catch today’s sunrise over the beach. With the consequences of a very late night still weighing heavily on your eyelids, you’d both emerged from a gruelling battle against sleepiness, just barely victorious.
It was just before five in the morning when you were groggily strolling the sandy beach situated just behind the resort you were staying at.
An inconspicuous glance at Nanami disclosed his relaxed posture and his softened facial features, a stark departure from the overstressed man who’d slumped into your shared home a few days ago. Your heart warmed now, as you observed him in this relatively rare form, dressed in a relaxed t-shirt and khaki shorts, arms moving in a loose, subtle swing as he walked carrying his sandals in one hand and a beach blanket in the other, how his hair was ethereally tousled by the whispering late summer ocean breeze.
He was lost in thought, chest rising and falling in deep, intentional breaths, and you hoped that he too, was taking in the salty scent of the ocean, that he too, could anchor himself in the serenity of the moment as the sound of the waves set a gentle rhythm to your sleepy steps, that he could ground himself in the soft feeling of warm sand yielding under his bare feet. And if this moment could serve as a modicum of respite, as a sliver of an escapist refuge both now and in the inevitable future moments when they would be called for, then you would consider your mission as being accomplished.
You halted your march just as the sky began to blush with hues of golden orange, towards which you turned, and Nanami followed suit, setting down the blanket he’d brought for you to sit on. You hadn’t made it too far from the resort, just enough to escape the early morning crowd; only a few other fellow beachgoers were sparsely spread out on the semi-secluded section of the beach. You settled onto the left end of the blanket, expecting him to join beside you, only to feel the unanticipated pressure of his body behind you instead.
Nanami carefully repositioned himself, gently snaking one arm around your waist and the other around your shoulders, pulling you toward him and enclosing you in a tender hug from behind. You mentally traced his movements by the way his warm breath moved from fanning the top of your head, over the back of your neck, and onto the side of your cheek, as he punctuated his journey with a soft kiss just below your jawline before his head settled on the right side of yours.
You closed your eyes, a contented sigh escaping your lips, and you wished nothing more than to ingrain this little haven of tranquility into your mind, for it to become the unforgettable safe place to which you could always revert.
Just as you turned your gaze to witness the sun now making its definitive ascent over the ocean, you thought you felt Nanami’s grip tighten ever so slightly in a shift so nearly imperceptible that you questioned whether it had even happened. It was a concern that quickly became secondary to your sudden awareness of the flimsy nature of the fabrics comprising his cotton t-shirt and your mesh cover-up forming the trivial barrier between his warm, well-defined arms against your cool skin, to the compromising position you now were in.
A sudden tension traveled through your body, seeking a place to nest as you fidgeted with the hem of your top, trying to return your focus to the wonderful scene unfolding ahead.
“What a perfect sunrise,” you ventured, in your best attempt to sound casual.
Nanami only offered a low hum in agreement, resonating and vibrating through your ear. And then, you felt it again: a slight upward shift of his hold, a minute increase in pressure.
This time, it was unmistakable.
Every sensation intensified tenfold in that moment. His muscular chest pressing into your back, his breath tickling your neck, the crook of his arm resting gently just below your chin, close, so dangerously close that you could lick it.
Without much thought, you brought your hands up and closed them over his biceps, at least as much as they could possibly wrap around their circumference, and slid over them, getting a good feel for the flexed muscles underneath his skin, until you landed on his elbows.
And then you pressed inwards.
Your move met no resistance, resulting in his caged arms further tightening across your chest. A sharp exhale escaped your lips as the feeling reverberated through your body, sending a shiver down your spine and straight to your core. You instinctively brought your thighs together, their friction only exacerbating the very sensation you were looking to evade. Your breath hitched, and you felt your mouth go dry.
As you tilted your head, leaning further back into Nanami, something you didn’t think could be possible, you could now distinguish the accelerating thumping sound of your heartbeat against your chest just under where his arms held you. You couldn’t imagine that he wasn’t privy to the escalating effect this all had on you.
He sat up straighter, a shift in movement that pushed his elbow right below your neck. Again, you felt it, gradual pressure—measured, steady, much like its perpetrator.
Just within biting distance, came the intrusive thought, popping into your mind like a sudden gust of wind in still air. It would be the first of many over the next few minutes, and you didn’t exactly know how much time passed as you staved off the ones that erred on the more wanton side of things, the ones that had you making a mental, logistical calculus of how much you could reasonably get away with, on this waterfront sparsely dotted by a few fellow beachgoers.
Nanami’s steady voice suddenly rumbled behind you, almost rattling you. “Quite the breathtaking sight, well worth the early wake up.”
And before you knew it, it was over. The sun was now up in earnest.
Nanami slowly loosened his grip on you, and still, you almost toppled to the side as you returned to reality, to where you were, to your packed itinerary for this final day of this short getaway, the one you’d meticulously planned and shared with Nanami with an excitement he’d reciprocated, a plan you found yourself now willing to completely discard and replace with the other, much simpler one you now had in mind.
You slowly turned to face Kento, attempting to gauge his body language, and found his eyes still fixed on the soaring sun behind you, engaged in a slow cross-arm stretch, and you could almost see the tension release and exit through his gentle sigh. If he was perturbed at all, he showed no signs of it.
Then, with a sudden shift, he switched arms, locking eyes with you.
“Shall we get breakfast, then?” he asked, casual as ever. “That concierge did a solid job pitching that brioche French toast. I’m itching to try it now.”
And had you not known him better, you would’ve missed the near imperceptible lilt of the tone of his voice, the hints of mirth crinkling at the corner of his eyes, the echoes of a knowing smirk under his deceptively soft smile.
You would have missed these details, had you not known better, following this sunrise that would long stick with you, for all the improper reasons, and you wouldn’t have suspected that, far more likely than not, Nanami Kento knew exactly what the hell he was doing.
The evening on which your suspicions were confirmed came a few months later, on the tail end of a chaotically busy period.
The combined effects of missed dinners and hurried goodbyes, of long work shifts and scheduling conflicts, had compounded, barely affording Nanami so much as a stolen moment with you, much less the quality time he yearned for.
Arduous missions stretched late into nights, and he’d find you home long after you’d lost your battle against somnolence; on your end, you could almost hear the guilt of your failure to stay awake ring loudly in the silence of the early hours of the morning, when you’d find Nanami crashed next to you, with exhaustion spelled on his face.
Canceled lunch dates were communicated in brief text messages you’d punctuate with goofy animated GIFs, a consolation tactic Nanami would’ve otherwise found to be endearing had it not carried the very calculated mandate of allowing you to evade his enquiries about whether you’d found the time to eat your first meal of the day.
Pure intentions and poor luck, right places but wrong times, and the universe appeared to be conspiring against you.
All the while, sitting just beneath the surface, was the simmering unease, steady as a metronome whose pulses were the moments of lucidity that pulled Nanami out of the comfortable shroud of the feigned normalcy he’d allowed himself to slip into. It was the same sentiment that caused his throat to constrict after encountering those occasional close-call encounters that had him face a formidable cursed spirit, the same feeling that transfigured into a pit in his stomach whenever it was you who was out on the field, and he hadn’t heard from you in a while. The ever-present threat now carried the weight of something unprecedentedly precious, and every once in a while, he would be subjected to reminders that were as intangible as they were painful, reminders that this line of work remained incredibly dangerous, and that this could all come to a very sudden end.
The Jujutsu Tech car came to an abrupt halt, jolting Nanami out of his contemplation.
His fingers brushed the cool metal of the door handle just as he peered into the rearview mirror from the backseat, and when his eyes locked with those of the colleague he’d spent the bulk of the week with, he found a weary gaze, reflective of the relentless pace of their recent assignments.
“Thank you for waiting, Ijichi. I should only be a few minutes,” Nanami said, giving the assistant manager an appreciative nod before exiting the car and making his way towards the training field.
On the radial bridge between surrender and acceptance, Nanami often found gratitude to be his only path out of ruinous rumination.
So today, he chose to be grateful.
Grateful for having cleared his mission much earlier than expected, and for the time this afforded him to take a trip to the campus facilities, to shower and to get into a clean change of clothes, in the hopes of catching you just as your lesson ended.
Grateful for Ijichi chauffeuring him from the dorms back to the training field where he could wait for you to wrap up your lesson and for agreeing to drive you both back home, together, finally for the first time in weeks.
Grateful for the current moment that granted him this sight of you, mid-lesson as you supervised a hand-to-hand combat session for a group of students, a view he’d grown both so fond and so familiar with.
The aluminum bleachers squeaked under Nanami’s weight as he took a seat, his eyes never leaving you as you paced behind the three pairs of students engaged in their bouts, occasionally stopping either to correct a stance or to provide some feedback. The visual transported him to a similar moment that found him on this very row of seats a little over a year and a half ago, a memory as sharp and clear as if it had occurred just yesterday.
You were alone when he noticed you.
Only a few weeks removed from the day he’d traded his briefcase for his blunt sword, an inexplicable unease and sense of displacement still loomed over Nanami’s head even as he walked the once-familiar campus grounds. His quest to locate a quiet spot to enjoy a late lunch in peace and away from one particularly aggravating Gojo Satoru led him to these training field bleachers.
He’d resigned himself to a life of relative solitude from the moment he’d crossed the threshold out of his office building for the final time, intent on leaving any semblance of his paltry attempt at a civilian’s life behind. The Jujutsu world had always been less than ideal, and a return to this life had meant making certain self-evident vows to himself, one of which being that he wouldn’t drag anyone into his orbit while he was active.
Never had he imagined that he would be the one dragged into someone’s orbit. Into yours.
You’d emerged from the field house on that early fall day, just as he opened the bento box he’d packed with the previous night’s leftovers. Even from this distance, he recognized you as the Grade 2 instructor he’d been vaguely acquainted with via cursory greetings, the one he’d continuously heard Ino speak so highly of.
Nanami observed as you entered a sequence of practice drills with your cursed weapon, a long spear that you worked so fluidly, as though it were an extension of your body. Each of your moves was a masterclass in balance between power and restraint, each strike precisely measured, each swing calculated. He watched as you thrust your weapon into wide, controlled motions that sent the long drapes of your skirt twirling in the wind, dark curls whipping around your face with your movements, the autumnal afternoon sun warmed your brown skin with a soft honeyed glow. By the time his phone vibrated to signal the end of his break, Nanami glanced down, only to find his bento untouched.
Perhaps he was compelled to take a few more late lunches following that day.
When Ino indirectly called him out on this new habit of his, it was Nanami’s ingrained inability to stray too far from candor that rendered him unable to outright deny the younger sorcerer’s cheeky hypothesis, that the true reason he’d opted to spend so many recent lunch breaks eating at those benches rather than the significantly more comfortable break room was because “the view was better out there”. Nanami understood from the moment he’d uttered his vague non-answer that it would mark the first point of exposure.
This inevitability was confirmed, a few weeks later, the cat decidedly out of the bag when Yuuji made a grand display of throwing his two thumbs up through the window just as Nanami slid into the booth seat across yours at a nearby cafe one day as he’d invited you to have tea after clearing another mission together.
“You do so well with Yuuji,” you’d said, once the teen was out of sight, dragged away by the sleeve by the young Nobara. “That boy is very lucky to have you as his teacher.”
“Well, technically I’m not a teacher,” Nanami replied in a tone that failed to convince even himself.
“You teach him things, Nanami. That’s the textbook definition of a teacher.”
A silent pause settled between you. Nanami stirred his tea absentmindedly as he watched you cut the apple strudel you’d ordered into smaller pieces.
“I’ve been thinking about joining the faculty,” he said, the words barely formed before leaving his lips.
“Oh, that’s wonderful, Nanami! I would be so thrilled!” you exclaimed. Nanami watched you quickly straighten up in an obvious attempt to dial back your expressed excitement, but he’d already witnessed you perk up, your genuine reaction stirring something deep and pleasant within him.
“We all would,” you quickly added. “Especially Gojo. You know he would immediately take credit for it.”
Nanami brought his eyes shut and rubbed his temples at the thought, “Please, I’m not even there yet. I’ve not talked to Gojo about this…” He paused again, opening his eyes to lock onto yours. “Or anyone else, for that matter.”
“Oh… So I’m getting the exclusive?” You replied in playful conspiracy. ”I feel so privileged.”
Nanami nodded quietly with a light, nervous chuckle, picking at the biscuit on his plate but not finding the will to take a bite from it.
“But in all seriousness, you should go for it. You’re a great mentor and a skilled sorcerer. The school could badly use someone like you.”
To this, he said nothing, his eyes wandering out the window in contemplation.
“However,” you ventured after a brief moment. “If you have any reservations, and you ever want to talk about them…” You trailed off, leaving the invitation suspended in the air.
Nanami’s reservations were so many, most of which he couldn’t possibly attempt to articulate even as they jockeyed for position in his mind. When he glanced back at you, he could sense you hanging onto his silence.
“You’ve done this for a while. Tell me your best piece of advice about teaching.”
He watched you gather your thoughts, pressing your lips together and narrowing your eyes like he’d seen you do countless times when a student would ask you a question and you would carefully formulate an answer.
“If you ever forget what it’s like to be a kid, get out. There’s no point in doing any of this if you can’t place yourself in their shoes, or yours, ten, fifteen years ago. As long as you remember the powerlessness and the lack of agency that comes not only with being young but with being condemned to our way of life, to seeing curses…” Nanami watched you pause to take the first bite at a piece of strudel, and as you chewed, he could almost see the rest of your thought forming through your eyes. “It’s such a burden, one no one should bear alone, least of all a child. At least, that’s how I see it.”
Before this moment, Nanami had tried repeatedly so, to qualify this magnetic draw to you, to label it. Was it the juxtaposition of the soft-spoken instructor against the fierceness you appeared to carry? Was it your nuanced condemnation of a system, all the while dedicating yourself to its people?
Perhaps it was at this moment, Nanami would ponder later, that he’d decided that this way of life was one worth living rather than simply surviving.
“Hey, you. You look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?” the playful tone of your voice snapped Nanami, who had been too engrossed to notice your approach, back to the current moment.
Gratitude.
He rose from his seat, bringing his hands up to gently cup your face, and leaned in to brush his lips against yours in a tender kiss. You froze momentarily, caught a bit off guard; for as physically affectionate as you now were with one another, neither of you was usually the type to engage in public displays of this, particularly not on campus. Today, Nanami quietly broke this unspoken precedent.
Only the first of the several he would break later.
“We have a ride, if you’re ready to leave now,” he said after he slowly pulled away. The notes of your lip balm were of vanilla, but to him, they carried the familiar taste of a fragile slice of happiness.
“Yeah… I’m beyond ready,” you murmured, still reeling a bit at the surprise, at the intensity of the moment. “Let’s get the hell out of here before I get roped into some last-minute bullshit, like last week.”
If the lapse in Nanami’s usual propriety was displayed in that one kiss, yours would manifest in several ways before you made the short ride back to your shared apartment.
And much as he’d done on so many occasions from the training field bleachers, Nanami simply watched you.
He watched as you leaned into him in the backseat of the car, running your hand against his thigh, innocently at first, then moving dangerously close to his crotch with every caressing stroke. The self-satisfied grin that stretched your lips as you detected a hitch in his breath did not escape him.
He watched as you teased him on the elevator ride up to your apartment as you pressed your back against his front, giving him a subtle, deliberate press and grind and catching his eyes in the reflective panel, just in time to watch his gaze falter ever-so-slightly. This, too, he’d remember.
He watched you, knowing that you enjoyed all of it, that you thrilled at the mischievous pleasure it was to poke the agitated bear, and he let you have your fun, exercising a restraint he didn’t think himself capable to maintain after a long, stressful and restrictive week spent nearly entirely away from you.
But as soon as you crossed the threshold into your shared apartment, as soon as he shut the door behind him and turned around to find your hands gripping onto his tie, pulling, yanking, his face down towards yours, almost too zealously?
Nanami decided he’d watched long enough.
He pushed back into you, his hands working in concert as one brought your fists together and off their hold while the other slipped into your hair, kneading your scalp down to the base of your nape. Assertive yet tender, his touch was a study in contrasts, sending a single, tantalizing shiver down your spine, igniting into a fizzing warmth in your stomach.
Your tongues met right before his searing lips closed onto yours in a kiss that was so urgent, so fervent, dripping with an eagerness you hadn’t felt in a while. He swallowed your whimper as your back lightly hit the vestibule wall, a reaction that wrenched a low, self-satisfied growl from his chest. Nanami could feel it now, more than ever—several days’ worth of unmistakably pent-up energy coalescing into a single, white hot ache.
He was unwilling to relinquish any closeness, not even now, as you peeled off him momentarily with a small, breathless gasp, two of your quick, heaving breaths to each of his. He felt your drumming pulse on his lips as he settled into the side of your neck, his mouth just below your jawline.
His mind replayed the slightly disappointed expression he’d discerned on your face earlier this morning, which now felt like a lifetime ago, after a phone call he’d later admonish himself for taking summoned him, along with his fellow Grade 1 sorcerers, to the school for a meeting that definitely could have been an email, just as you’d brought him a cup of orange juice to pair with his toast. He heard himself groan out in frustration now, at the memory of the first breakfast you were having together in weeks being unceremoniously cut short, and he nipped at your throat, eliciting a moan from you that faded into the background of the hazy, regretful thoughts that were reinvigorating him to make up for lost time.
The late afternoon sun was mostly blocked out by the heavy living area window curtains, which had remained drawn, a testament to the hurried exits you both made earlier. Nanami’s eyes were slowly getting accustomed to the dark, just enough to catch your warm brown eyes searching his as you gently pressed your palm against his chest, blinking up slowly at him with an unreadable gaze. He sensed you shifting your left foot behind your right one and glanced down just in time to watch you slip out of your second shoe, but not before you slid your knee up the inside of his leg, pressing and rubbing against his crotch teasingly, evoking an uncontrolled hiss out of him at the unexpected contact.
“Missed me, Kento?” you crooned.
A light chuckle rumbled up through Nanami’s chest. “Maybe just a little,” he mumbled.
“Just a little? Just maybe? Come on now. We’re well into a few weeks married now. Surely you can be more honest with me,” you replied, in mock offence.
“Oh, you don’t find me honest?” he said with a scoff, something dark in his response.
Instead of pulling away from this newfound, compromising position, Nanami doubled down, firmly pressing his hips to yours, forcing your leg back down, and you found yourself now trapped between the wall and the visibly voracious man before you.
For the brief second he brought his head down to your shoulder, with his hot breath ghosting over your neck and his lips grazing your ear, you expected him to say something, to call you out, to chastise you, but instead, his response came as a slow, deliberate roll of his hips against yours, ensuring you felt every last inch of the increasingly stiffening problem you’d helped create against your core.
You arched into him with a throaty gasp as his lips found the base of your throat once more, lightly nibbling. His hand closed on your hip, firmly gripping it in place as he leaned against the wall to summarily kick off his shoes, not unlike you just did a mere few seconds ago.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” you ventured, in between the two languid grinds of his hips that pushed his thigh to settle between your legs. “Are you honest?”
The dark chuckle preceding Nanami’s reply should have served as your first warning.
“Are you?”
His fingers twisted around the hem of your shirt, and you could already tell, in the way he pulled it over your head in one swift movement, lobbing it over his shoulder with a dexterous flick of his wrist, that he would waste no time in dispensing with your clothing, that his desire to ignite this fuse burned just as brightly, perhaps even more fiercely, than your own.
You’d barely heard your top land unceremoniously on the linoleum floor before feeling his fingers reaching to do the same with your camisole, goosebumps erupting where he grazed your skin, spreading like wildfire. You pulled at his tie again, pulling him down and planting another kiss on his lips, something slower, more sensual than the first. Only when its straps slipped down your arms did you realize that he’d used the moment to unhook your bra, and you shook out of it, letting it clatter to the floor as well.
Your second attempt at undoing his tie was thwarted once more, something slightly rougher in the way he grabbed your hands and drove them back down to your sides.
“Turn around,” Nanami said, brusquely. The space was quite dark, but you didn’t need to discern the expression on his face to understand that the strained gentleness of his tone did not make this any less of a command, one you gladly obliged.
Your steadying hands met a texture, cooler and smoother than expected, meeting a bit of resistance as they glided over the surface. You felt a bit heady for the short moment it took you to reorient yourself, to realize your compromising position, to recognize the blurry outline of your own reflection in the flat, full-length mirror mounted against the vestibule wall.
You stilled and patiently waited, agitation melding with eager anticipation as your mind associated a vivid visual with the sound emanating behind you, one of the audible friction of sleeves sliding upward against bare skin, an enticing prelude of what you knew was to come.
Nanami trailed his hand along the waistband of your skirt, the one he loved so much; it looked so good on you, it was so easy to remove. He hooked his deft fingers and slowly slipped them downwards until he met the resistance of the thickest part of your thighs, pushing past before allowing gravity to complete the endeavor. Your senses heightened as he haltingly did the same with your underwear; the slickness of your arousal was untouched but felt, unseen but heard as he peeled off the final barrier covering you, the faint rustling of your underwear dropping onto the flooring marking the definitive end of his task.
Through the reflection, you’d observed Kento’s actions.
Through the reflection, he’d observed you.
Your stomach fluttered with an invigorating sensation, and you thought you could weep in restless anticipation.
“Truth framed in silver,” he said, his tone guileful, his voice growing huskier with each word as he hovered his lips just above your ear, “the mirror never lies.”
The shift in tenor of this encounter was suddenly palpable, and just as you were about to offer your best attempt at a matching response, his arm encircled you at the waist and he pulled you back towards him with a strong press of his fingertips into your hip, sending a jolt that went straight to your core. You caught it all in the reflection, a sight so deliciously distracting that you failed to notice his other hand surreptitiously sliding down between your legs.
Nanami hovered just over you, fingers lightly brushing against where you desired him the most, just long enough for you to suffer the ache of unspent need, just close enough for you to feel the pressure which had built within you and was now left hanging, and he found just enough dampness to gauge how utterly aroused you were. You bucked at the contact, barely stifling an impatient moan, eliciting another low scoff from Nanami, your second warning of the evening.
That Nanami now held the upper hand, and that you would suffer a bit for it.
For a moment, you thought about how quickly the tables had turned in this little back-and-forth. If you were going down, you thought, it wouldn’t be without a fight. Just as you had half a mind to formulate a witty, provocative comment to retain some semblance of a footing in this battle of wits, Nanami slid his middle finger into you, hooking it upward, finding, in record time, the spot he’d long since learned to reduce your body to pure need.
An unbridled, breathy moan cascaded out of your lips, ringing loudly in the charged silence, a sound almost as obscene as the lack of resistance met by his articulate finger, and as the slick sound it made. You didn’t have to look up to feel Nanami’s steady gaze on your face as he took in every last detail of your reaction.
His fingers moved with gentle insistence, picking up a controlled but unrelenting pace. His ring finger joined a short moment later, padded tips rubbing against the most sensitive parts of your walls, moving with intensity, with intent, as if it carried the express purpose of proving a salient point. The slow pleasure building at the base of your spine had you squirming, incrementally bending down, instinctively going as low as Nanami’s grasp would allow you, his arm otherwise holding you firmly in place.
“Kento…” you whimpered, squeezing your eyes shut as you fought to stay tethered to reality.
“Don’t look away.” It’s another command uttered into your ear, traveling straight between your legs, his tone carrying a slight harshness this time and you opened your eyes, meeting what you knew to be a deeply watchful gaze, even as you only barely began to make out his features through eyes that were still getting accustomed to dimly lit surroundings.
Your head dropped slightly, and your eyes returned to the reflection of his hand and of his fingers. He picked up the pace, his movements growing more dauntless, as if he was putting on a show with an air of nonchalant pride. Your eyes glued to the sight of his calloused fingers repeatedly rubbing against that one sensitive area, the one he’d learned to relentlessly exploit in moments like these, when he both wanted and needed to bring you to a quick undoing.
It was too much; the feeling of Kento’s long fingers working you, the sounds they made and how they mingled with your escalating whimpers; the occasional brush of his palm against you, the sensation of the wet line of kisses he traced from your bare shoulder to the side of your neck, his quickening breath on your exposed skin. You felt all of it, each element inching you closer towards the sweet solace of release after over a week of having to go without.
But what ultimately did it was the reflection in the mirror, the one that granted you an angle you were unused to, a visual whose details you were already committing to memory. There was just something about witnessing his fingers and the way they drove into you, twisting, seeking to unlock the deepest parts of you.
Your knack for ascribing meaning to the abstract concepts, a strength you often leaned on as a teacher, was now squarely working against you, etching indelible associations into your mind.
Like the manifestation of sheer strength earned through repetition and grit, the one Kento drew from to defeat those curses on a regular basis with dexterous swings of his arm, the same strength that now held you against him, the same strength powering his movements.
Or the precision he’d used that first time you’d watched him chop those vegetables in his kitchen, what now felt like eons ago, and how it was analogous to the way he was now driving into you with practiced precision.
Or even the rhythmic pull of the muscle against the edge of the fabric of his shirt sleeve and the way it sat snug on the curve of his forearm, adorned by the gleaming band of his watch, its cool metallic band occasionally brushing against you as he moved.
It was like that distant memory of the first time you’d been taken with the way he’d rolled up his sleeve in that infirmary, a quiet assertion of competence, of power, as he’d prepared to bring his task of filing his report to completion.
And how it was now you that Nanami Kento sought to bring to completion.
It was the last coherent thought you formed before the coil within you finally tightened beyond capacity. You were desperately chasing your imminent release, your hips rocking helplessly against his fingers, against his palm, greedily chasing that friction, and suddenly you were there, right over the edge. Words of warning sat on the tip of your tongue, not quite fully formed, but when your eyes focused on his, you saw the exact moment he read you.
“Tell me how you’ve missed this,” he said, and it was a gentler tone that carried words that appeared to be for him as much as they were for you. “Show me.”
“Fuck, I’m—,” you breathed, trying but failing to catch the thought before it escaped you.
The first part of his request would go unfulfilled; you wouldn’t get the words out, except for a light curse as you were hit with the thrilling force of your release. As for the latter part, he wouldn’t have to ask twice.
You clenched around his fingers, hard, quivering through the breathless cries that fluted up into the air as you tipped your head back into his chest, clutching the arm that was still holding on to you. Nanami gave one insistent final press into your upper wall before stilling and letting you ride out your climax, soft praises in his low voice spilling into your ear, words you could only discern once your moans subsided moments later, once you began to come back to yourself.
When you reopened your eyes, you caught, in the reflection, the intense gaze of the architect of your unraveling and found something familiarly ruthless brimming just beneath the surface.
Nanami was far from being done with you.
The realization sent another tingling between your legs, causing you to inadvertently clench around the fingers you only now registered had remained inside you. After a moment, he began to pull them out in a tantalizingly slow, drag, and you certainly didn’t miss the very deliberate brush of his hand back down against you, your slippery release aiding the downwards slide of his palm, past his wrist and just far enough to feel the ridges of his forearm which formed an unfamiliar but welcome sensation for your muscles to naturally clench around.
It crossed your mind that Kento was being premeditated in his movements, a hypothesis that was almost immediately supported once he rubbed his palm down once, twice, and a third time against your sensitive flesh before pulling away, meeting the slightest resistance as your body instinctively bucked up against his hand, and as it tried to keep a hold on it before he lifted his hand to your eye level. And when he extended the fingers of his hand, moving them slowly, presenting the sheen of your slick on them, showcasing with excruciating detail the mess you’d made on him, you understood that this man was dead set on being particularly relentless this evening.
Nanami leaned deeper over your shoulder, his ear pressed to your cheek, and brought his fingers to his mouth, licking them off, one by one, slowly, meticulously, his eyes fixed on yours through this once innocuous mirror, and all you could do was watch, exhale at the sight, and try not to lose the remainder of your mind at his low hums of satisfaction, at the sloppy sounds of his tongue laving over his fingers, and then down his arm over where he’d just dragged it against you.
A fucking menace.
Once he was through, Kento took half a step back, and you instinctively backed up into his steps, into him, knees feeling a bit shaky as your bare ass met his rigid hardness prominent even through the barriers provided by his pants.
The contact jolted some lucidity back into you, returning your capacity to discern further beyond the shapes reflected to you, to spot the nuances, to study the facial expressions you’d spent the last couple of years learning, a subject you could confidently teach an extensive course on from sheer memory. You could see them now, the small tells you’d picked up on throughout your relationship, evidenced in this particular furrowing of his brows, in the tightness of his jaw, in the way his shoulders were drawn taut in an attempt to contain an inordinate amount of tension. They were the ones confirming that Nanami Kento was also only hanging on by a thread, that maybe you still had a chance to recoup some of your lost ground, that perhaps you shouldn’t count yourself out just yet.
It was a notion that revitalized you.
So you bent over, leaning onto your hands on either side of the mirror’s edge, and pushed back against him, something of a long, most deliberate grind, your bare backside brushing against the fabric of his pants to which he let out an audibly sharp exhale and a small jump back from behind you.
“There you are,” you murmured playfully, releasing a self-contented giggle as you felt him twitch within the confines of his boxers.
You leaned further back, trying to reach him again, seeking to recreate that enticing friction, but Kento was more swift this time around. He caught you, pulling you up and firmly holding you flush against his chest.
“Tell me—” he started, his hot breath causing you to inadvertently buck into him, interrupting him. He steadied himself in recovery, snaking his arm around you and across your chest, returning his mouth to your ear and locking eyes with you once more before resuming. “Tell me, was it honesty from your part when you copped out, that one time I held you like this?”
“I don’t even know what you’re talking about,” you replied defiantly, feigning ignorance of the dire direction in which this conversation was headed.
Because you knew damn well what he was referring to. You’d known it, as soon as Nanami’s arms slid around you from this angle, squeezing the top of your chest in this particular way, the memory of that long weekend at the beach resort came rushing back to you, carrying along with it the feel of warm sand between your toes, the sound of crashing waves, the taste of salt on your lips, and the feeling of coming this close to tipping over even as you were held in place, of falling even as you sat firmly on sand, of vocalizing that one thing you’d wanted from Nanami for a while.
He nipped at your earlobe, bringing you back to attention, before continuing, “Was it honest of you to dangle that carrot, only to pull it all away?”
You scoffed at his playful audacity. “Alright, Kento. Let’s not be revisionist here, I’m not the one who pulled away.”
“Ah, so you do know what I’m talking about. Good. Because never did I think that I would be led on by my own wife,” he said in a tone tinged with mock offence.
“Led on b— Please. Don’t even start. You and I both know you weren’t going to do anything.”
He let out a short, amused chuckle at your indignation, followed by a low hum as his eyebrow shot up in a questioning arc. “Elaborate. What do you mean by “anything”?”
You felt his words pierce through your thin veneer of indifference and land deep inside you, where the truth lay.
“At the beach, Kento? In broad daylight in the early hours of the morning, in public? Yeah, that’s not you,” you retorted, feeling your air of defiance slip with every word. Uncharacteristically off your bantering game, you tried not to wince at your rather meager attempt at evading his question.
“What’s. Not. Me?” He said as he held your gaze, a brazen challenge in his tone as he shifted his arms higher, squeezing tighter with each emphasized word, visibly not falling for your prevarication.
You felt like a weary tightrope walker, precariously swaying above a silent, perceptive audience of one, faltering in this fool’s errand that was the maintenance of this delicate self-imposed balance, tired legs wobbling, begging you to put an end to this self-inflicted turmoil, to give in to gravity and to allow yourself to fall.
Through this damn mirror, you locked eyes with Nanami, finding them heavy with intent.
And suddenly, it wasn’t so dark anymore.
“You want something,” he said softly, not a question but a declaration.
Was it the spark you saw in Kento’s eyes in the moment as he’d cornered you towards the edge of the invisible cliff?
Was it that some of the pent-up tension you’d just released had taken some of your inhibitions along with it, replaced with a hazy, slightly more relaxed perception?
Or was it simply easier to peel away from the safety of timidity into the fire of candor when it was through the artificial buffer of a mirror?
Whatever it was, it had certainly emboldened you.
Here goes everything.
“Mirror never lies, right, Kento?” You’d had no intention of reprising his words when they tumbled out of your mouth in a soft whisper. “So why don’t you tell me what it was that stopped you from finishing what you started, back then at the beach?” you heard yourself say in a tone you barely recognized, tremulous with a blatant, reciprocal lust. “From finally putting me into a real headlock and—”
You cut yourself off just as you witnessed a darkening spark cross Nanami’s eyes, brief but perceptible enough to make your stomach flip. He closed on the remaining space that turned his hold into something closer to the one you’ve been seeking for so long, with the crook of his elbow nuzzling into the base of your throat, just off center, the sensation causing you to squeeze your thighs together, and your heart to pound through your chest.
“And… What else?” he whispered, matching your low volume, warm breath brushing your nape. “Complete that thought for me.”
You shook your head, a motion that was not so much to express your negation as it was to dispel the trance threatening to take over your mind. When you opened your mouth again, an uncontrolled, nervous scoff preceded your words.
“Just answer the question, Nanami.”
You reached your arms behind to hold him on either side of his legs, a blind attempt at maintaining some form of tactile control, realizing only now, how fully clothed he was, versus how you decidedly were not, as you ran your hands over the soft fabric of his trousers; it was a striking manifestation of your positions in this balance of power, in this repartee. You felt his next deep chuckle more than you heard it, but this time you could sense an undercurrent of agitation, of your man’s willpower slipping, palpable, like static before a storm.
And so, you added, “Or will you back out of this too?”
Nanami pushed slightly into you, and you brought your hands back on either side of the mirror, steadying yourself once more.
“I see,” he started. “So you don’t think I can wait you out?” he said, rocking into you in slow movements, the sensation of his rigid length all but contradicting his statement. “You know, I was just thinking about how lucky I got with today’s assignments. Two short missions, a couple of hours each, an in-and-out, really.” He paused to gently move a loose strand of hair that had fallen over your eyes aside. “My day was a cakewalk. But yours? Early morning class, back-to-back training sessions… I’d imagine you’re tired, that you just want to lie down, therefore I’ll just wait, until you inevitably—”
He cut himself off with a hiss that extended into the lowest of groans.
You felt it before you realized that you’d decidedly let the intrusive thought win; the sinking of your teeth, more nibble than bite, into that soft compressed roll of flesh, by the elbow’s bend, just on the inside of Nanami’s arm.
It was what set him into eager motion, and everything moved so quickly after that. You spotted the decisive moment in his eyes, carrying their first visible sign of reciprocal lust.
Nanami released his grip for the first time since you’d entered the apartment, a major concession to his overpowering stance, and you nearly fell forward at the sudden shift. You watched him disappear behind you, into the obscurity of the room, as he seemingly leaned down into something of a lunge. You heard the sound of a heavy drag against the floor, followed by that of objects softly tumbling onto the ground.
“What are you—” you started.
Before you knew it, Nanami caught you by the waist once more, and gently but firmly pulled you aside as he made way for what he was sliding towards the mirror, settling it between the wall and your feet. It took you a moment to discern the distinctive shape of the entryway bench that had long graced the entrance of your home, a small navy blue couch, upholstered in supple leather, stylish in appearance, dual in it’s practicality, of serving as a spot to sit while putting on the shoes that it now clearly no longer held.
You lifted your gaze towards the mirror, and found something eagerly desirous having replaced the playful front Nanami had managed to hold thus far; if you were silently telegraphing your keenness, he was responding in kind, his eyes not leaving yours as he gently nudged you forward, your feet lifting to hang over the edge of the small couch as you kneeled onto it.
He held your gaze still, and instead of perceiving his movements, you were left to rely on the sound of a sharp metallic clink resounding loudly in the silence, followed closely by the distinctive whispery rasp of his leather belt gliding against a thick fabric and punctuated with a brisk zipper sound. When he settled behind you, returning to the proximity you’d gotten accustomed to, Kento was armed with a familiar, damp hardness that you felt on the small of your back.
For as uncharted as the territory of this angle was, you both moved wordlessly, as if this was a well-practiced dance. You lowered yourself to bring your palms flat onto the bench, your hands sliding across the smooth leather. You aligned your back, lifting your hips up and spreading your knees apart, just enough to feel an aching breeze on your core.
Nanami climbed in earnest behind you, teasing his tip right against where his fingers had worked you a mere few minutes earlier, a slow, torturous, repeated motion he relished in for some long, excruciating seconds. You whimpered in lament, struggling to deploy the words of defense and mercy dancing on the edge of your tongue. Only when you began to squirm did he place his left palm on your back, holding you in place as he began to steadily press into you, inch by inch, until he filled you, deliciously so. Short, breathy moans escaped your lips with each press, and they were met with a low, restrained hum emanating from your lover, as you adjusted to the thick, welcomed intrusion, and he waited for you as you did.
After a moment, you were practically vibrating with an unabashed need for friction, something he caught on to. He pulled you at the hips, bringing your back flush onto his chest, keeping you both on your knees. You could now admit that you both loved and hated this mirror, for the newfound angle it gave you as you watched Kento’s right hand slide up from your hips, slowly, torturously caressing you along the way, kneading the fleshy skin that sat on the side of your breast, up until his arm found its gratifying destination.
This time around, there was no half-measure when Nanami hooked his arm just below your throat, constricting you with the right amount of pressure that allowed you to ample ability to breathe, but that would deny any movement beyond that, something you realized as your back arched instinctively both at the anticipation and at the actual hold. Despite having barely moved since he entered you, you could feel your pleasure mounting exponentially.
Your eyes met once more, and you realized that he’d been keenly observing you, studying your face as you went through all these motions. While his gaze was electrifying, you saw hints of the Kento you knew surfacing, burning with lust and love, always prioritizing your pleasure, your well-being. And there it was, conveyed through the simplicity of a glance, the truth that wasn’t a safer place on earth to be.
You watched the corners of his mouth twist up into a soft smile, a crinkle in his eyes which spoke equal parts of mischief and affection, forming quite the juxtaposition with the successive prompts he threw at your reflection.
“You enjoy this, don’t you. Whenever I wrap my arms around you? When I hold you like this, while I’m inside you?”
There was a newfound roughness in Nanami’s voice as he emphasized the last word with a tightening of his right arm around you, along with a deep press of his left hand fingers into your hips. You moaned and bucked your hips at the combined sensations, at the implication, the truth, the underlying desire of words said in such an even tone. You were intent on pushing him to give you what you needed, but he held firm, granting you only half of what you craved with this hold, completely denying you the motion portion of this equation you’d grown so desperate to solve.
“Tell me, honestly,” he emphasized employing the word that had become the refrain of the evening, “Let me hear you, my love.” It was quite discernible now, even in this compromising position that had you at his mercy; the thick lust in his voice, reminding you that the effect he was having on you was not so one-sided, and that he needed to hear you, just as much as he wanted to.
“Yes…Yes, I do,” you breathed, words slipping out as a ragged exhale, and you felt a sting of tears at the sudden intensity of a confession you’ve carried too long, one you somehow could only bring yourself to make in this current moment.
“Yes, you do,” Nanami repeated, his voice reduced to a low hum, but you could hear his approving smile even as he tried to conceal it, his eyes fixing you as though to speak to the deepest parts of your soul. “That’s my girl.”
You keened at his praise, your legs reflexively twitching with a forceful movement that sent the weight of your body shifting precariously off to the side. You let out a gasp, expecting to tip over before Nanami strengthened his hold and repositioned you back firmly onto him, pinning you down by keeping one arm around your chest, and the other encircling your waist. The new angle pushed him deeper still into you, eliciting a whimper from you and a whisper from him, words traveling directly into your ear.
“Let’s not fall now,” he said, in a tone that was already softer, palpably affectionate, “not yet.”
Always there to catch you.
It ruined you beautifully, in the moment, the fact that Nanami had not only mastered the art it was to rile you up, but he’d also long since known about this particular little inclination you’ve carried since forever, that he’d sat on this power, his teasing dispensed as an excruciatingly slow, intensifying burn over the last few months.
None of it mattered now, because he began to move and despite the unmistakable eagerness dripping from both of you, Nanami took his time in taking you from stillness to stride, setting off in a carefully slow but powerful pace as he drove himself into you.
And fuck, did it feel so good.
He rocked his hips into you as you rutted back against him, as much as your limited range of motion allowed you, at this foreign angle that did not take away from the familiarity of this dance.
You squirmed as he drove into you with incredible precision, gradually picking up the tempo with each stroke, his measured gaze never leaving you, and even in the throes of escalating rapture, you discerned a strain in his expression, carrying an undercurrent of something carnal. You were panting, trying to catch your breath as he moved you against his hips effortlessly, making you feel each thick inch as his arm applied a deliciously punctual pressure against your upper chest with every thrust.
It felt both rough and tender. The visual was doing so much for you, too much, but still you fought the urge to shut your eyes for the umpteenth time to ground yourself, and Nanami caught this, attentive as ever.
“Stay with me,” he said, as he squeezed you ever so slightly to get your attention, your muscles immediately clenched around him in response, and he groaned at your reflexive reaction, renewing his intention of keeping up the pressure and on keeping you contained until he’d achieved his singular objective.
Your eyes desperately searched for a focal point, landing on themselves in the mirror’s reflection. You barely recognized the woman it presented, hair wildly disheveled, makeup sensually smeared just like as you barely distinguished your voice, with the wanton moans and the vocalized feedback aimed at the man in the reflection, as you told him how good he was making you feel, as you asked him to go harder, and as you let him know that he’d found it right there, the perfect spot, just like he always did. You’d grown more vocal, loud enough to be heard over the increasingly rhythmic slapping sound of your skin against his, and to match the volume of the words Kento was in turn, directing at you, words that only belonged to you and that bound you to him in ways that transcended what your bodies could ever achieve.
You felt yourself unraveling, your pleasure mounting as you visually took in the intimate spectacle unfolding in front of your eyes. Nanami was attuned to you like a piano string was to its tuning fork. He’d learned to find the things that made you tick and where you needed him the most. He’d practiced how to calibrate himself to the right rhythm, to the perfect angles, using your expressive reactions as his North Star. And in the same way he’d learned all this, he could always tell when you were close to climax, just as you were now.
“Let go for me, my love,” he whispered to your reflection, his voice rough with need.
The thunderstorm of pleasure had long been on the horizon, but that first cold ripping sensation of lightning always caught you by surprise. Your body pulled taut with gratification, and you came, quicker and louder than the first time, convulsing at the rapturous intensity of your orgasm, your pleasure hitting you in waves, trapped, constricted, with nowhere to go but in on itself. You tried to cling to your vague awareness of Nanami’s gentle coaxing, to his encouraging words as he nibbled at the shell of your ear and saw you to completion, his thrusts slightly relenting in tempo but not in intensity.
When you came to, it was to witness your slumped body leaning against your husband, breath still evening, and you could not help the smile gracing your lips, and the joyous delirium it manifested. His grip had loosened by now, and he was stilled, but still inside you, his chin resting on your shoulder as he watched you.
Nanami’s wonderful arms lowered to hold you at the hips again, and you gripped them, leaning on them as you tilted your face backwards and to the side, and you caught his lips in a searing kiss, one that was slower, lazier but also so dizzying, the only reminder of your predicament was the instinctual roll of your hips and the clenching that came along with it as the kiss deepened.
After what felt like long, radiant minutes, he brought you both down onto the small couch and gently broke the kiss to turn you over at the hips, lowering you onto your back in a single, swift movement. You felt his weight carefully sit atop you as he straddled you at the waist.
You peered up at Kento, at your beautiful man, a thin sliver of light slipping through a narrow gap in the window curtain ethereally bisecting his face in a golden diagonal path that illuminated his left eye, over the bridge of his nose, and gliding down the hollow of his right cheek. He was still clothed, except for his unzipped pants; still relatively composed, barring his rumpled shirt, his tousled hair, and the lipstick marks smudged on and around his lips and down the side of his jaw.
You could detect it, as clear as day, that something had switched within him. Gone was the playful, mischievous man who wanted to prove a point, who sought to get the last word, who endeavored to wring an admission out of you in the name of the little teasing game you’d both slipped into. Replacing him was a more heartfelt iteration of himself, the one you knew to be less relentless but no less restrained in his passion, and who would aim to both come and watch you come, face to face, where he could read you, like his favorite book.
Nanami sat back on his knees, looping his finger into the knot of his tie, loosening it just enough, in the way he knew you loved to watch him do. He took your hands into his and brought them to the dangling silk fabric, finally letting you complete this task, finally indulging you in yet another small fixation.
Kento looked down at you, running a finger along your deep-toned cheek, and for the first time in this encounter, he grounded himself in the moment. There had been a time, in a not-so-distant past, when he would feel almost guilty on occasions like this, whenever he’d found himself yielding to the warm, effervescent energy that surged from his chest.
For so long, choosing happiness while being ensconced in this particular field of work felt nothing short of selfish, foolish, and delusional. But somewhere along the lines, Nanami had become an inadvertent student of yours, and what he’d learned was that there was a deeply repressed side of him, silently yearning for a sliver of the joy he’d worked so hard convincing himself he didn’t need.
Teacher to many, even to him in some ways; you’d been the one who’d forced him to confront the fact that the line delineating blind selflessness from being a coping mechanism was as thin as it was blurry. There was a certain pattern of behaviors, one that saw Nanami conceal survival in virtue, that you’d called him out on quite a few occasions.
A late-night phone call in your early days together that had you both up way past your usual bedtimes.
A lunch date while picking up the emotional pieces after a tough mission.
An argument the two of you had, after you’d called him out just as he was about to slip into what he could now retrospectively admit to be this self-preserving cocoon of self-sacrifice, call-outs he knew deep down to be true, to be well-intentioned in their objective of saving him from himself, and for which, after some self-reflection, he loved their messenger all the more.
But sometimes, Nanami’s appetite for what had long eluded him surfaced in a simpler form, like the one of a man and his lover, happy to be reunited after several days of work getting in the damn way.
And now, Nanami chose happiness.
Now, he’d allow himself to have this one thing.
“Hey, handsome…” you started, pulling him back to the present as you brought a finger up to his cheek and lightly poked at it, “You good?”
The corners of his lips twisted into a tired smile, and his response first came as a gentle, reverent kiss on your forehead. Then your temple. The outer corner of your eye. The top of your cheek. He spoke in between each of these, over a week’s worth of tension, of stress and frustration defused into sincere words.
“So many… fucking... assignments... I… I’m sorry,” he said solemnly, and the vulnerability in his tone was audibly palpable to you. His words suddenly reminded you of the way this had all started, about the yearning and eagerness you had for one another after a dreadful few days of going without.
“I know... Not your fault,” you said quietly.
“I’m here now… Not leaving…” he continued, as his lips moved down to your jaw, to the pulse on your neck.
“You’re here, Kento,” you whispered, words that you hoped could reassure him as much as they did you.
Nanami rose slightly onto his knees, positioning himself between your legs. You felt him pause briefly, right at the edge of entering you once more. With a shuddering sigh, he slipped back into you with silky swiftness. You moaned at this first thrust, as he pushed firmly into you, holding himself in the deepest part of your core for a moment before moving again. This time, Nanami was less verbal, more focused; you were less pent up, more present, more sensitive to the way he poured his feelings into you, pure passion conveyed through his movements.
You knew of this demeanor well, of this determination set in his eyes; the express intention of keeping himself just on the edge, of delaying, of denying himself the solace of release until he could wring one more orgasm out of you, and directly watch you fall apart for him.
Always so considerate. Always so stubborn. Could he not give in for just this once?
“So good, Kento,” you managed to get out, shifting the rest of your energy towards a mission of your own, of coaxing him to finally let go and to finally finish inside you. You writhed up to meet him halfway, desperate to have him bury into you, clamping down around him every time he pulled out of you, feeling your determination and pleasure mounting in tandem.
Your eyes met and Nanami must have detected your intentions because he shut him closed, eyebrows knitting in concentration as he sat back onto his knees and pulled you by the hips, maneuvering you closer to him with one hand and reaching to palm your breast with the other, doubling down on his own objective of bringing you to your release.
You waited until he moved to switch his attention to your other breast before you grabbed his hand, brushing it up against your throat, and you felt Kento’s fingers hover over its column just as your mind did over the idea of settling them there; an intrusive thought you would have allowed yourself to verbalize, had you not embarked on a different mission of your own. Instead, you enlaced your fingers with Kento’s and pulled his arm, brushing it against your lips, nibbling over his wrist, over his forearm, eyes still on him as you watched him barely withhold a hiss at the contact, visibly hanging on to his composure by a thread.
And for the second time that evening, you closed a soft bite over his arm.
Kento’s eyes snapped open and locked onto yours with a searing intensity that made your breath catch, and you found, etched into the depths of his gaze, a silent yet familiar narrative of unraveling, one you could cite chapter and verse.
You watched as his initial shock bled into amusement, a reaction attesting not to a fluke but to an affinity, a path newly discovered, a new door unlocked. You felt yourself teetering dangerously on the edge of your own release, thighs quivering as your mind registered Nanami’s peculiar reaction to his arm under your teeth.
“That’s not fair. You can’t do this,” he said with a breathy chuckle.
“Then stop me,” you whispered back, your tone laced with provocation as your lips nibbled over his arm, your teeth just barely grazing him.
Nanami was still watching you, still resolved to maintain his composure, but you could feel it in the way his pace picked up, his thrusts now slightly more erratic, slightly less precise. You knew he was close, as sure as you knew what it would take to tip him over.
You bit down again, a bit more forcefully this time, and he let out a guttural groan in response, as he watched you through half-lidded eyes, desperately using what remained of his will to keep his eyes on yours, as he always did.
“Please, please fill me, Kento,” you moaned, your play at speaking to his depths, your final attempt at coaxing him to come with you, wiggling your hips as they came up against his, throwing everything at the wall, anything to take him with you as you spasmed with the eagerness of your pleasure and barrelled towards your release.
“Fuck,” Nanami cursed with a hiss, as he yanked his arm away from you and pinned both your hands on either side of your head, his fingers interlacing yours as he leaned his head down to your level, shifting all of his weight to his hips, sinking deeper into you. The dam was finally breaking, his rhythm faltering recklessly, his hips a stuttering pace, finding a tempo that smoothed into the pure, mutual longing you’ve had to keep at bay for over a week. You felt the bench slide and shift under his forceful thrusts.
And when Nanami choked your name against your lips, it was with a reverence that eclipsed any other form of praise he could muster.
You vaguely heard yourself begging him greedily, praising him deliriously, thanking him sincerely until you cut yourself off with your own long, unabashed moan just as you tipped over the edge. You wrapped your legs around Kento’s waist, bringing the balls of your feet to the small of his back and arching deeply into him, clenching onto him as you quaked through another rippling climax.
And now, you felt it. Now, the paragon of self-control that Nanami Kento was would finally yield to the limits of his restraint.
Nanami held you down in place in a firm hold, and huffed out a short scoff followed by a low grunt. He gave a brisk, fluid double thrust before he spent himself into you, his release coming as hard and long as the groan that ripped through his lips as he pressed and held his hips to yours. A shiver of pleasure shook you, your hips bucking into his instinctively as you felt each pulsing tremor of his release sputtering deep inside you. You opened your eyes to catch a quick glimpse of his face inches from yours, his eyes glazed over, his smile soft, satisfied, spent. You felt a blooming sensation in your heart as you witnessed Kento arrive at the destination he so deserved. This right here, you thought, was your antidote to everything.
It always was a deliciously nebulous feeling, and this time was no exception; you’d tried it countless times before, to temporally orient yourself within the first minutes that followed Kento taking you to orbit and back like this, always finding yourself unable to know how long you’d stayed in place like you did now, with his full weight on your body, still deep inside you. How long did it take for your fingertips to make the full journey spanning the small of his back to the nape of his neck, stroking feather-light touches that glided slick with sweat, until they found his undercut, right where his hair clipped close and where his scalp was the warmest to touch? You both lay there for a moment, as your breaths slowed, basking in the aftermath of a most sincere act of love.
Lost in a hazy fog, you’d nearly forgotten where you were until the metallic clang of your ring hitting the bench leg as your hand hug off to the side jolted you back to reality. You absentmindedly ran your hands along the leathery texture, only for the time it would take for your thoughts to flit back to a blurry memory that clung to the edges of your mind.
Several months prior, one of your nightly strolls together finds you and Kento in a boutique furniture store. You’re seated on the plush leather entryway bench that caught your eye as soon as you entered the shop.
“Look. This thing is comfortable as they come, doubles as a shoe rack, good quality, and it’s on sale? I’d say it’s a solid buy,“ you say.
Nanami hums softly, in contemplation. “This isn’t just you wanting it for yourself, is it?”
“This is for your apartment, Nanami.”
“It is, but with the amount of time you’ve been spending there…”
“Oh, so I’m overstaying my welcome now? Is that what I’m hearing?”
“Don’t do this. You already know you’d be over more often if you’d let me have it my way.”
“Well, any more and I would be living there.”
“Perhaps you should be,” he says, his tone devoid of jest.
You pause at the implication of his words. “Is this your not-so-subtle way of soft launching cohabitation, Kento?”
“And if it is?”
You turn on your half of the small couch, rotating your body towards him, and you find him fixing you, serious as ever. You narrow your eyes at him. “Really? Despite what has to happen first?”
“Specifically because of what has to happen first.”
It’s a commitment he makes so easily, as if it is the most natural thing to say, in the middle of a random furniture shop after an impromptu leisurely weeknight walk and some froyo.
You brought your hand back up in the air, your contemplation bringing you to fix your wedding ring on your finger, as you lay your back on this small cushioned bench, which you now recognize to be quite the symbolizer of a new beginning, even tonight, in a twisted, unusual way.
“Are you alright, darling?” Nanami’s voice reached the foreground in your distant haziness.
Silly, idle thoughts converted into your response before you could stop them.
“We just made another use for it…”
“Hmm?” he mumbled against your ear, where his lips still rested. “Another use for what?”
“This little bench of ours. Doubles as a shoe rack, triples as…” You trailed off, letting the suggestive connotation hang in the air.
“A good investment,” he concluded after a short moment with a light, almost timid chuckle, as if he hadn’t yanked the piece of furniture himself, just minutes ago, as if he hadn’t just boldly taken you on it.
You mirrored his amusement as you reveled in your amazement at the diametrically opposed dualities of this man. Because now it was the more tempered version of your Kento resurfacing, the one who left a gentle trail of kisses that were as wet and hot as the fluid spilling off the sides of your thighs as he slowly slipped out of you, and shifted off of you. Nanami brought his lips to yours in a play to swallow the inevitable whimper he knew you’d emit, your usual protest at this kind of friction and its resulting loss of contact.
“Stay here…” he instructed softly, as he peeled himself off the bench.
And this is how you found yourself lying on your back, staring at the suddenly mesmerizing portion of the vestibule ceiling you’d never had the opportunity to pay particular attention to. Your eyes were here, tracing its unfamiliar pattern, but mentally you were tracing another line, the one which took you from that fateful first encounter at the infirmary, what feels like forever ago now, to the present moment that had you catching your breath and chuckling to yourself in both disbelief and contentment.
In retrospect, this fixation with his arms was so silly. In the grand scheme of things, it was so small. It always was the small things with Nanami. Like the way he tends to keep his footsteps light, like he was doing now, as he crossed the distance to the master bathroom, and flicked the lights on along the way. Or the gentleness of his movements as he reemerged in your field of view for the time it took to help you sit up and handed you a glass of water before disappearing as he crouched down beside you, bringing a warm damp cloth to clean you up, soothingly stroking his fingers along your shoulder as he did so.
You finally turned to meet his gaze, your mind still in a haze, and you watched as he moved swiftly, wordlessly sliding his two arms underneath you to lift you up, carrying you bridal style.
It’s the small things, but also everything else.
Because it wasn’t a small thing, that all of the dangers in the world lay outside this door, outside this room, the fact that right now, wrapped in these wonderful arms of his, is where you felt the safest.
It was no small thing that all of your worries, all of your troubles, all of your insecurities, could be cast aside in his presence, granting you a kind of freedom that was so difficult to hold on to while around others, the one to unapologetically be yourself.
It’s not a small thing, that even now, as you let your hand travel up the firm planes of Nanami’s pecs, up to his defined collarbone, over the beautiful curve of his shoulder and down his sculpted bicep, that not even this warmth and strength came close to accurately representing the full sense of safety you felt with him.
It was a safety that went far beyond the physical; for as cautious as you’d always been around shedding your inhibitions, for as nervous you were about opening yet another layer of yourself, to confidently accept yourself and to allow yourself to be accepted, there wasn’t a single person on this planet that you could trust more.
It made you wonder if you would ever be equipped to justly convey such a precious feeling.
You pressed your cheek against Kento’s chest, listening to his breathing and his heartbeat as he maneuvered across the apartment towards the master bathroom.
“You enjoyed that a little too much,” you said, finally breaking the comfortable silence that had settled between you.
“What part? You’ll have to be more specific,” he playfully replied as he glanced down at you.
“You love tormenting me.”
“Tormenting you? Need I remind you that it was, in fact, you who started this?”
“No, you started it, with that kiss at the school. Never had you do that before.”
“Oh, am I not allowed to miss my wife?”
“Ah, so you did miss me. Finally, he’s honest.”
Nanami gently eased you down on the bathroom floor, right next to the bathtub, which was still filling up, and just in front of the mirror, through which your eyes met.
“It’s not my fault we seem to need a mirror to be candid with one another,” he said with a smirk.
He wrapped his arms around you once more, hugging you from behind. They were relatively small, but in the bright overhead ceiling light, they were prominent; you brought your fingers up them, to the small bite marks on his forearm.
“Tread lightly, Kento,” you started in a reciprocal tone, “This is a two-player game now.”
Nanami knew this well, and for this, too, he would be grateful.
A/N: You made it! Thank you for reading! <3
#nanami kento#nanami x reader#jjk fluff#jjk smut#jjk#jjk nanami#nanami x you#nanani x black reader#nanami smut#jujutsu nanami#kento nanami x reader#kento nanami x you#nanami kento romance#nanami#rahu's recs
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Miraculously flirty | Minji Kim

summary: being ladybug is tiring, especially when there's a flirty cat-bear around every corner and all you want to do is focus on your crush, minji kim. based on the episode “truth” iykyk.
warnings: none
tags: chatnoir!minji, ladybug!y/n, both are hopeless, actually a crack fic
WC: 2.8k

who knew finding a random box of earrings on the sidewalk would change your life forever? definitely not you.
but now you were stuck fighting villains that some lame guy named hawkmoth kept sending your way just so he can steal your miraculousness! how fucking rude.
whatever none of that matters because at least you still get to go to school everyday to swoon over your long time crush minji kim.
ugh how you could talk about her for hours and hours that your best friend hanni would have to duct tape your mouth shut to get you to stop.
ever since you became the guardian of the miracle box, you haven't been the best of friends. you can't see your friends anymore, nor can you see your partner in crime chat noir. worst of all youve been skipping your dates with dani.
and it’s not like you hated dani. she was sweet, funny, talented, everything anyone could ever wish for. but your eyes always strayed back to minji. yes, the very minji who was actually chat noir. not that you knew that. after all, identity reveals were forbidden, for both of your safeties.
“HEY! THAT’S MY DIARY!” you screamed, lunging toward yeji, the fox kwami, who was flipping through it like it was the morning newspaper.
“hyein, please!” you whined, nearly knocking over your chair. “i thought kwamis couldn’t come out into the human world without a holder?”
“i guess now that you’re the guardian, the rules are a little more... unpredictable. just like you!” hyein, the kwami of creation, chirped while munching on a square of a peanut butter banana sandwich.
before you could scold her, your computer suddenly started ringing. your best friend hanni’s name flashed on the screen which was triggered by the kwamis jumping on your keyboard and phone like it was a trampoline.
you tried to compose yourself as the call connected.
“hey y/n… are you alright?”
you froze, realizing the kwamis couldn’t be seen through the screen. to her, it just looked like you were fumbling around like a lunatic, grabbing at thin air.
“haha yeah i’m fine! just, uh… really missed your face!” you said, trying to scoop a flying kwami back into the box.
hanni squinted. “hmm… awkward gestures, flustered rambling, pure clumsiness… oh my god. is minji in your room???”
right on cue, your phone started ringing again.
shit. it was dani.
“WHAT? NO?! OMG DANI!” you yelped as the kwamis launched your phone onto the keyboard, hanging up on hanni and accidentally accepting dani’s call.
“hiiii dani!” you tried to sound normal, not like someone who was being tormented by little flying animal things.
“hey y/n… thanks for the pictures of your room… filled with photos of minji?” she asked, her voice uncertain.
“HAHA YEAH UM… IT'S FULL OF PHOTOS OF MINJI BECAUSE uhh im using them for fashion pics on my blog and i know you have great taste and wanted to ask for your opinion minji!”
“…my name is dani.”
“right! dani! you, of course. obviously. totally slipped up because i’ve just been soooo busy.”
“it’s alright. so… are you ready?”
“…ready for what?”
“our date? i’m waiting downstairs.”
you froze.
your mom shouted from downstairs, “y/n? dani is waiting for you!”
you scrambled to shove all the kwamis back into the miracle box and shoved them in a drawer slamming it shut.
“hide hyein!” you whisper yelled. she rolled her eyes and zipped into your purse.
your mom opened the door just as you were fixing your hair. “didn’t you agree to go out with dani yesterday?”
“shoot! it was supposed to be yesterday?” you gasped dashing down the stairs.
“that’s why we agreed i’d come pick you up today silly,” dani said with a grin. “it’s the last showing. would’ve been a bummer to miss it.”
“right… the showing… of course.” you nodded. you still had no clue what she was talking about.
your parents, nosy as always, chimed in. “that movie was terrible when it came out.”
“maybe, but y/n and i love it. we promised we’d see it together.”
“OH MY GOD WE’RE WATCHING THE TITANIC,” you blurted.
dani raised a brow. “don’t tell me you forgot?”
“nope! not at all!” you lied through your teeth. dani deserved better than this.
as you two walked to the movie theatre, she chatted about new albums. you tried to focus, you really did.
“i heard everything’s gnarly,” she said.
“gnarly? what does that even mean?”
“like boba tea, fried chicken, tesla… you know?” she replied.
sitting down in your seats with your popcorn you took a small box out of your pocket that was a gift you bought for dani.
“here. this is for you :)”
she opened it and squealed. inside was a tiny plush bunny holding a carrot.
“eeee! it’s so cute!” she hugged it close.
you were about to lean in and kiss her when the whole building shook.
“what was that?” dani asked, startled.
“haha probably the subway! you know how it runs here! anyway i’m uh, super thirsty! gonna grab some water!” you jumped out of your seat.
in the washroom, hyein popped out of your bag with concern.
“you’re really gonna ditch her again?” she asked softly.
“what am i supposed to say? ‘sorry dani, i’m actually ladybug?’ yeah, no thanks.”
resigned, you nodded. “we’ll deal with dani later. hyein, spots on!”
✨insert your magical girl transformation here✨
you landed on the rooftop and called your partner.
“hey bugaboo, here’s your faithful companion at our rendezvous point just like always~ hope you haven’t forgotten about little old me~” minji’s voice rang out from a voicemail.
you were about to respond when-
“BOO!” she yelled behind you.
you screamed, grabbed her arm on instinct, and flung her off the rooftop.
“AHHHH I’M SCARED OF HEIGHTS!!!” she yelled as she flew off the side.
“EH?! CHAT NOIR??” you gasped, recognizing her voice. you lassoed her back up. well… kind of. she smacked into a window on the way up.
“i could’ve seriously hurt you!” you scolded.
“the only thing that hurts is when you make me patrol alone,” minji pouted. “mmm… i even missed your angry little pout :(”
“i’m sorry kitty cat. things have been… overwhelming.”
“guardian of the miraculous box now huh? big responsibility. but if you want, i can show you what else is big ;)” she winked.
you nearly let go of the rope.
“you’re so annoying. keep this up and i’ll actually make you patrol alone.”
“whatever you say, m’lady.”
meanwhile, back at the theatre, dani sat through the entire movie alone.
you didn’t make it back until the end credits rolled.
“haha sorry! the line was so long. and… i had to take a huge shit because i drank milk this morning and i’m lactose intolerant,” you blurted.
dani just sighed… but smiled anyway.
throughout the rest of the night, emergencies kept interrupting your date. lollipop monsters, flying balloon bombs. each one left dani waiting, alone.
when dani finally performed her song at the pier, you were late, again.
“um… i’d like to dedicate this song to y/n… a girl… who isn’t here. as usual,” she said into the mic, heart sinking.
you showed up halfway through, but even that wasn’t enough to lift her spirits.
after the performance, dani pulled you aside.
“y/n… where do you go when you disappear? just tell me something. anything. i’ll believe you. but… if it’s because you still love minji, i’ll understand.”
“that’s not it!” you insisted.
“then tell me the truth.”
“the truth… is the only thing i can’t tell you.”
and that’s when hawkmoth found his opening.
dani’s expression faded from hurt to anger in an instant. the words of hawkmoth getting to her.
“truth… i’m giving you the power to force people to tell you their secrets.” hawk moth whispered in dani’s head.
“no! the truth needs to be shared not taken by force hawkmoth!” dani shouted, gripping her head trying to fight it.
“what? hawkmoth! dani no!” you shouted, reaching your arm out but not actually doing anything because you need to have a conflict in this instead of i dunno shaking her or ripping the rabbit stuffed animal you clearly saw the moth go into but i guess you are blind today.
“RUN, Y/N!” she cried before she lost control completely.
you ran away as fast as you could because you realize you may have plot armour but not enough to survive the amount of embarrassment you’ll face if he gets you to say you suffer from ibs. i mean, when you’re forced to reveal you’re ladybug.
you ducked into an alleyway, yanking open your bag.
“we have to purify that akuma,” you said, breathless. “before dani makes me admit that i once cried because i fell down the stairs.”
“you did cry,” hyein nodded solemnly.
“no need to drag me, the stairs already did that.”
you held up your earrings. “spots on!”
✨another magical girl transformation, complete with dramatic wind, glowing sparkles, and a pose that makes your bones crack✨
you scaled a nearby building, keeping to the shadows. truth or should you say, truthified dani, was floating above the city, riding a giant plush bunny like it was a throne. beams of light shot from its eyes, forcing people to shout out their deepest secrets.
“i busted to a photo of drake!”
“i taught my child brain rot as their first words!”
“i peed my pants yesterday!”
“chat noir,” you whispered into your communicator. “we’ve got a bunny problem.”
“did you say bunny? what kind of bunny? fluffy bunny? murderous bunny?… or like, you bunny ;)?”
“CHAT NOIR PLEASE, FOCUS.”
a blur of black and neon green streaked across the sky and landed beside you with a dramatic flip. she flicked her bangs and smirked.
“you called, bugaboo?”
“yes. and if you make one more pun, i’m calling animal control.”
“kinky.”
you sighed. “okay, plan time. dani- i mean truth, gets more powerful the longer we hesitate. we have to find the akumatized object.”
“probably that bunny plushie,” minji said, tilting her head. “if i were akumatizing someone, i’d definitely pick something tragically adorable.”
you nodded. “i gave that to her… this is my fault.”
“hey. no it’s not,” minji said softly, dropping the flirty tone for once. “you’re doing your best. and your best is… well, incredibly hot.”
you were about to respond, but a blinding light shot toward you both.
“ANSWER ME!” dani’s voice echoed like thunder. “WHY DO YOU KEEP LYING TO ME?!”
you both dodged just in time, crashing into a rooftop billboard. you landed awkwardly on top of minji, your face inches from hers.
“hi,” you squeaked.
“so you do like being on top,” she smirked.
you rolled off her like she was on fire.
“we need to distract her. get her to drop the bunny. you take the left and i’ll handle the rooftop.”
“roger that, m’lady.”
as she zipped off, you tried not to think about how your heart was racing for two different reasons: one, the villain currently shooting lasers at your city, and two… chat noir.
god, why did she have to be so annoying? and charming?
as hanni was leaving the pier, a spotlight suddenly gets put on her making her freeze.
dani then zaps her, “tell me the truth! what is y/n’s secret?”
hanni quick to answer, “she’s in love with minji kim!”
“that’s not a secret!”dani says.
zapping another person and being met with the same response of, “y/n is in love with minji kim”, dani gets frustrated.
“no! she must have another secret!”
not being able to witness this anymore because my god is this embarrassing for you, you spring into action in a quite stupid way dare i say.
instead of trying to surprise dani, you instead leap from the roof and land with a big thump on your face. you were going to land on your feet but you tried being more of a parkour master with 0 training.
dani zaps you quite easily.
“now… i’ll finally know, who are you ladybug?”
hawkmoth about to bust from this information ong. he salivating at the thought of knowing your true identity.
“i… am…” and just before you could say anything, minji tackles you into the ocean.
“YOU'RE AN OLYMPIC SWIMMER!” minji shouts as she pushes you into the water.
hawkmoth grumbles from his little man cave. “dani! go after them!”
“no, i have to find something out first.” and uses the truth power on her own mother.
“mom… who’s my dad!”
“your dad is leonardo di caprio…”
“what? sorry hawkmoth but this cannot be put on pause” dani said as she leaped away.
meanwhile you and minji reconvened.
“what are we gonna do about your truth spell?” she pointed at your lips that now were painted with white lipstick.
you didn’t try speaking before pointing towards her belt and grabbing it.
“hey take me out to dinner first ;)” she said, as you tied the belt around your face to cover your mouth.
dani ran across town eventually coming across her supposed father. using her powers on him, she asked hesitantly, “im danielle marsh… are you my father?”
“danielle marsh… i am your father…” he replied.
“THEN WHY DID YOU ABANDON ME?” dani shouted, hurt.
“because i was partying, dating models, divorcing people for turning thirty. wasn’t ready for parenthood.” leonardo replied, clearly not sorry at all.
before dani could cause anymore harm to him, you and minji showed up. after pushing leonardo into a safe place, dani was able to get away with the goal of finding out y/n’s secret.
“SHIT THE BOX OF KWAMIS IS IN MY ROOM! SHE’S GONNA FIND THEM!” you shouted at minji.
“then we’ll just have to get there before she does,” minji smirks, unbothered.
at your house, dani storms in.
“what is y/n’s secret?” she demands, using her powers on your father and mother.
“she loves minji kim,” your dad says.
frustrated, dani turns to your mom. “does she have a diary?”
“yes, in her room.”
dani storms in, throwing stuff around. just as she finds the miracle box, you and minji burst through the window.
dani’s able to send her bunny rabbit after you, as it attempts to freeze you in your spot.
“m’lady im not one to bark orders but a lucky charm would be amazing right about now!” minji shouted as a chair was thrown at her, ducking just in time.
you couldn’t speak so you just pointed to the belt that was around your mouth.
“uhh take it off i have a great idea!” minji said with a suspicious look on her face.
dani punches her right after before asking you, “ladybug tell me-”
minji interrupts her and says, “what's your favourite quality of chat noir?” smirking as she continues to fight.
“well i love how your charming, brave, and your sense of humour”
“aww you really do like me!”
minji then gets hit with the truth spell.
“cat noir what-” before dani can finish her sentence you interrupt.
“what's your opinion on me being the new guardian?” you ask practically batting your eyelashes.
“well as long as it doesn't change anything between us then i'd say it's pretty cool” she replies.
eventually you and minji are able to subdue dani and return everything back to normal by throwing your piece of tinfoil into the air that you got as your lucky charm. it seems everything just always works out i wonder why that is. oh well let's not dwell on it, you have main character things to attend to.
sitting on the rooftop at night, you watched the sunset. you had just ended things with dani officially and wanted to make your feelings clear for yourself again. you were transformed into your ladybug form as a teenager on the edge of a building that was 20 stories tall would definitely get the cops called on you.
“i like minji kim, and there's nothing i can do about it… shes just so pretty and hot and oh my god the way she dresses, she could undress me anytime-” you were in the middle of your ramble before you heard coughing behind you.
minji stood there in her chat noir outfit with red cheeks.
“was i interrupting something bugaboo?” she asked a bit flustered.
you started to panic i mean how much of that did she hear?!?!
“listen its not what you think really i-”
before you can replay she presses her lips against yours.
“y/n… you don't need to pretend anymore.” minji says as she recalls her kwami haerin.
you follow in suit recalling hyein.
“how did you know?” you asked.
“well, it would be awfully strange why ladybug would keep the box full of miraculous’ in y/n’s room if the two weren't the same people huh?” minji teased.
“ugh you are so annoying!” you shoved her lightly.
minji only pulled you in closer before whispering in your ear, “i've waited a really long time for this”
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Hello Madam. Sorry Madam.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#madam jin#jin zixuan#jiang yanli#'Hey what is WWX trying to do here?' some kind of grab-and-twist maneuver that would be very upsetting to watch.#I know LWJ technically assists WWX in this scene in terms of blocking someone's blow on his behalf -#- but let's be honest. Real friends stop you from doing the truly stupid things.#Or maybe it was envy. Penis envy. The non-freudian kind.#Regardless...man this whole scene was just full of “and then someone else walks in”.#I swear to god every cultivator who is supposed to be hunting ends up wandering into this part of the woods.#a bonus for me because it gives me several good joke opportunities.#Madam Jin gets top prize for best entrance and exit. I wish her all the best. And a divorce…madam please leave him…#And can we please address the horses? I love horses. But why...why do they ride in on horses when they HAVE FLYING SWORDS?#I can only imagine it is for the dramatic flair? It just feels so jarring hearing someone clip clop in#and then another person swoop in on a sword.#The rules of mdzs's world can get fuzzy and I have to nod in an impressed manner at how much MXTX gets away not explaining.#Maybe the sword gets tired after a while and they need to give it a break? Maybe there is a sword union that dictates working hour limits?#…Would that make Chenqing a scab? Oh god it would… unions *hate* this flute!
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What do you mean they can see everything?
Tim: Jason. You have your tumblr profile set to public. People can see who you follow, and what you've liked.
Jason: No.
Tim: Yes.
Jason: So then everyone can see...?
Tim: Yes.
Jason: How many people know about my account.
Tim (smiling wickedly): Enough.
Jason: How to I make it private?
Tim: Why would I tell you that?
Jason glares at Tim with the hatred of a thousand suns.
Jason: Even if I deleted the account you'd recreate it by hand wouldn't you?
Tim: yep.
Jason, hands clasped together, leaning forward: I will pay you.
Tim: I could take over Wayne and Queen industries in a week if I wanted to, money doesn't matter to me.
Jason: Then what do you want?
Tim reaches behind the couch and picks up a black motorcycle helmet. He'd planned this interaction. Sonofa-
Jason: No.
Tim: no? Alright... Damien is going to love scrolling through so many-
Jason: FINE. Fine. Fine. You can use my bike.
Jason digs into one of his dozen breast pockets, pulls out his keys, and tosses it to Tim.
Tim: Cool. I'll give it back Friday night after I take Bernard out. You have until then to delete the account or set it to private.
Jason: Can't you just... hack the likes away?
Tim: That many? Not a chance. So either suck it up or delete it.
Tim walks away, satisfied and looking forward to driving the infamous Red Hoods bike into a brick wall.
Jason watches him go with pure hatred and respect. He opens his phone and checks. Sure enough he can see other peoples likes. He flicks back to his page and scrolls through his likes. 10,000 in just one month. How long had he stared at his phone on patrol?
He was never going to understand technology again was he...
Tim walks Bernard out of his apartment, promising him something really special. They finally get outside to the curb and Tim dramatically points to... nothing.
Bernard: Uh, cool. So are we walking to the surprise?
Tim: I left it right there what hap- I need to check Tumblr.
Bernard: Tumblr?
Tim: Yes.
Tim opens his phone and looks at Jason's page. He's posted a photo of himself driving in the middle of the street laughing like a maniac.
It is then followed by re-posts of several cutesy photos of animals hugging each other. Specifically of wolfs curled around their cubs, carrying them by their scruffs, and so on. Damian has already commented on seventeen, demanding why Todd would hide this from him.
Tim: That petty little...
Bernard: So what was the plan?
Tim: I blackmailed my brother into giving me his bike but he chose to expose the himself rather than let me use it.
Bernard: You mean that brother?
The six foot tall brick house that is Jason Todd appears behind Tim and slaps his brothers shoulder.
Jason: I said you could use my bike little bro. Not which one.
Jason sweeps his arm towards a vintage 1983 Honda Shadow he'd parked a few spots down.
Tim: Your kidding.
Jason: I'm not
Jason, leaning in closely to whisper: Because I know you wouldn't dare crash this one.
Jason, loudly chuckling: Have fun on your date. See you Bernard
Bernard: See you Jay.
Jason walks off cackling. He gets a ping on his phone. It's Grayson.
Grayson: Why didn't you tell me you liked wolves??? I could have been sending you wolf memes daily.
This is then followed by a tidal wave of adorable wolves.
Grayson: See? See i can give you memes. Jason let me make you happy!!!
Jason already regrets his decision.
#batman#batfamily#batfam#Jason todd#red hood#tim drake#damian wayne#dick grayson#yes i did make this because i realized my page was set to public#seriously though this man died in 1988#he would not understand the internet#why wolves you ask?#Because a pack communally raises the cubs and i find that a perfect parallel for the batfam all mutually supporting each other#also he turned into a wolf in beast world#so like#wolves are his cannon fursona#i don't make the rules#writing#fanfic#not the best I know but its funny okay
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Oh absolutely you do not even need to agree. I am only expressing my own personal opinion and why I have the stance I have but of course you can like it is up to you and of course you can be eager on it or see only the positive it brings. It definitely is your opinion. I respect it. 🙏 I only express why I do not like it
Yup exactly or that people think that in order to do something "trendy" instead on focusing on making it more accurate they do exactly what you say. Basically use the popularity of an old tale to do their random and original stuff they just use the names for popularity and then Basically not do anything of that tale they adapt said or stood for.
Yup you get it. Or worse that you do not matter. "It is popular so who cares?" "There are versions so this is equivalent to your ancient history" or "it is a fake story and fanfiction who cares?" And as you said use it only for anesthetics and fun instead of truly appreciating it. Do we feel happy that our stories continue to inspire? Sure. But why do we need to pay the price of being used like a happy meal advertisement all the time? (By the way I would love to hear more about your culture too)
Oh please not at all do not feel like that because as I said you did your research you actually got curious and showed interest. This definitely is how you are being respectful and you do use your inspiration and enthusiasm for actually delving into it and that is definitely the best way to do it. The fact that you liked the result doesn't make you morally inferior in any way absolutely not. You must never apologize for the things you like especially since you delve into the roots of this culture.
Please never apologize. You must never apologize to anyone since you know and you do separate some things. You enjoy music and you enjoy the feeling of coming together and you definitely bring a good point that indeed in a world where art is underrated (and I know because my brother is a professional musician and barely manages to work at celebrations) artists managed to elevate their careers and make a name for themselves and push forward and indeed that is great the same as it is great that people like you come out of it that actually delve deep and do not consider the retelling as 5he source
But yes speaking on sources should have been the rule not the exception and unfortunately it isn't happening. I definitely understand how such efforts are appreciated which is why I am disappointed because it would have been so awesome if he had used that talent to actually promote the Odyssey instead of something that just uses the Odyssey as a name.
Here's one example that I discussed with a friend; instead of the ridiculous culturally "600 strikes" that made Poseidon one of the most powerful gods look like a boasting idiot and his previous "get in the water" badass song appear like useless empty threats Here's an idea:
Why on earth didn't he put a duet battle between Poseidon and Leucothea?
Like Leucothea appearing giving him her belt. He could play again with the "get in the water" pattern but this time Leucothea encourages him. Then she fights with Poseidon to protect Odysseus..maybe fails miserably but keeps going on occasion singing "get in the water" Odysseus struggling in the water calling for help or chanting the names of people he lost as he struggles. He could make use of the suffering pattern here like Leucothea singing to Poseidon to take the suffering from him.
Even better use the same voice actress of Penelopw to play Leucothea and use the same pattern of Odysseus finding strength hence etc and that is only one example that one could use and make it loose but still be more respectful to the text but given the changes it wouldn't mean much at that point but GOSH would I appreciate it more than whatever the hell happened in that saga!
Thank you for understanding and please do not feel the need to change your taste or opinion on the musical swayed by this only. But I am happy that you understand where I come from and of course I will continue my work even if no one sees it because that is MY passionate project!
Most people on Tumblr: Yay! We can have a musical based on the Iliad! Me after seeing what happened with Odyssey plot especially the last saga and the fandom logic inserting the ancient sources (again):
youtube
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I can't stop thinking about the post from a few days ago about how Critical Role has been great at doing personal faith but didn't put the necessary work in to discuss the religious/god angle of c3 in-depth. Like the fact that Cardinal Respa was linked to both the Dawnfather and the Chained Oblivion is, on a personal level, very interesting (fallen/corrupted priest goes hard) but like does that mean that there's a Papacy somewhere in Exandria dedicated to the Dawnfather? If so, are there more cardinals who ordain the bishops of the Dawnfather? Are there Conclave-level intrigues going on in the Dawnfather's Sistine Chapel? Why is the Dawnfather so Christianity-coded in vibes alone if there's no actual outline of his religious organisations? With Downfall the Dawnchild/Dawnfather thing makes the allusions to Christ as Son of God co-existing with the Father textual - was there a Dawnfather Schism around whether the Dawnchild was a separate mortal? Was there a Reformation about how the Dawnfather's Pope kept selling indulgences? Is that why the priest of the Dawnfather Grog & Pike offer a drink to doesn't partake because of a cultural shift between Protestant-Temperance-League-coded and Catholic-coded Dawnfather congregations? Why do I have so many questions about the religious organisation of one of the most important Prime Deities in Exandria and to Critical Role's 3 campaigns? How on earth were the cast (and us as the viewers!) meant to care about the gods if all they had were "really tall kings" instead of interrogating how religious organisations provide both a place of healing and community to a wide range of people and also a place of horrific harm and abuse for a wide range of people?
#cr meta#cr discourse#critical role#it's just. maddening#i mean a college of cardinals who can all shoot god a quick dm and ask who's the best for pope is an absolutely hilarious image#makes for a great comedic setpiece tbh#but like seriously matt if your whole multi-campaign story needs people to have strong feelings about the gods beyond how they personally#affected them (keyleth vex and ashton come to mind as people who were negatively affected by certain gods due to personal reasons)#it might be a good idea to develop the religious organisations of these gods! let people see how these things work out instead of letting a#vibes-based approach to christianity rule the whole discussion! kord's whole deal about strong people is fascinating! are his priests all#body builders? do they have a central hierarchy based on strength? we don't know!#are the wildmother's clergy pro- or anti-alcohol? does she even have a clergy?#or are all the religious temples we have seen just set dressing because religious buildings in the real world just have cool designs?#is it because in fantasy the trope is that most protagonists don't care about religion and their temples are literally there for vibes?#i'm aware i'm getting way too close to stan-parasociality on that last point but if we have a cardinal “do we have a pope” is a logical#follow-up question. i'm aware there's not that much info in the campaign guides so that gms can do their own thing but in the#“the gods deserve to be eaten because they were mean to me” campaign surely a more interesting line would be “do the gods deserve us if#their organisations cause systemic harm as was done to bor'dor and........"#can you tell i don't want to do any actual work today. i sure can't#and yes i'm main-tagging this if people are hostile to me on the internet for this buddy there's a phenomenal button i'd like you to meet
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also more codelyokoposting but I really really dig XANA as a villain. It's not a person with a complex background that led them down the path of evil, it's not a morally grey character you sympathize with but condemn. It's a powerful AI capable of controlling almost anything in the real world. It doesn't have a face or a body, we only know it for its symbol and for the monsters it controls in the virtual world. It's willing not just to kill people through various methods (poisoning, drowning, car crash, fucking space lasers too?) but also Earth as a whole (it tried to blow up a NUCLEAR PLANT and crash two trains with toxic chemicals in them). And we don't even know why it does this, at least not for now. It may not even have a particular reason, just some sort of virus or malware in the form of an AI that seeks nothing but destruction without any goals in mind. This "pure evil" characteristic doesn't come off as childish, like in some children cartoons, it's just kind of scary to think that such an incomprehensible and destructive force exists, almost feels like a natural disaster
#m#code lyoko#that said i wish the rules of what xana can and cant do were a bit more established#like not to be a cinemasins but why doesn't it just hack the factory's elevator to stop the group from entering the room#what's stopping it from attacking the real world non stop#i think it would have been great to have an episode where they go like 'hey xana needs to rest after every attack and also we've put -#some measures to always have access to the computer room just in case it tries to block the entrance or the elevator'#idk something a la death note where you know what they can and cant do with the death note#and as always i wish the action was done better because sometimes it's like. girl you can do that very easily#specially in the virtual world. sometimes there'll be one enemy standing still and no one does nothing and then they get killed and like ?#i'd feel more threatened by xana if the monsters also seemed more threatening#and if its attacks were more grounded in reality? like that one episode where it controls yumi's samurai armor. literally what#the earthquake was also very 'oh it can do that i guess'#i like it when it's stuff like the trains almost crashing with each other#the technologic stuff i think works best. especially because it's something not everyone knows how to fight against
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Ulysses obsession with the Courier is a special type of sad to me cause the Courier’s part was so important but so unwitting. They had no idea what was in the package they delivered and neither did he. Neither had an idea of what it could’ve done and the Courier was only caring out their job (mind you the Courier could be killed via notes in the express contract if they don’t). To them it was just another regular delivery to the divide and one that they likely thought would help, just like all the ones before.
It’s so tragic for Ulysses to hold so much ire to the Courier when it really was the case of it could’ve been anyone. Anyone could have delivered that package but they did and so he focused the blame on them and it destroys what he is trying to instill in the courier on a fundamental level.
#like yeah the courier delivered the package but in the end that’s a job#any random courier could’ve delivered it especially since we know in the past the factions were farther apart and this travel was a smidge#safer but courier six got it and this Ulysses blamed them#like I don’t care much for Ulysses because I think lonesome road embodies don’t shoot the messenger at it core#and what people focus on doesn’t focus on the fact that in the bigger picture#everything went wrong because two factions were at war and at some point the codes would have been delivered#and the divide destroyed cause with how close it is to NCR territory it would of been found#like there is an inevitable and too many people treat Ulysses as if he knows more or is more aware of the idiosyncrasies of conflict#when he’s like fundamentally flawed just at the standard of being a legion apologist STILL and just how focused he is on one persons#involvement cause yeah choices matter even the small one but I think Veronica’s quest says it best with a line from the courier#you can’t control what they do#like the courier couldn’t and can’t control what they deliver and yet it’s got them in hot water multiple times#like do you think they enjoy being shot or knowing they are indirectly responsible for activating the annihilation of a community#to me it’s hypocrisy to be willing to end the world or one world to prove a point and whatever argument made that only military factions#suffer forget there are innocent civilians suffering that had no part and Ulysses is no better than the Courier#I don’t like devils advocate and a lot of the dlc just feels like that but idk I know people love it but the depth is just not there for mr#ulysses fnv#fallout#fallout new vegas#courier six#the courier#lonesome road#the courier has very little personality outside what we give them but some lines and delivery paint a picture#like uhhhh undertale deltarune rules ig
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Alice insisted that it wasn’t true. Jack was going to have to help her understand just how incredible she was. She seemed to renege every compliment that Jack sent her way — out of humility, he knew, but it just … was so obvious that she was the most talented person in the world. Certainly the most talented writer. Couldn’t she see that?
Alice said something that almost made Jack laugh out loud. It seemed crazy … coming from him? Didn’t most people fucking hate politicians? Especially ones like Jack — with multiple houses and cars and who seemed to shirk responsibility at every turn in life? No. Alice had it all wrong. Jack was nothing compared to Alice.
Alice who could create worlds and new emotions with just a few sentences.
She reached over, grasped at his t-shirt. Jack held his breath because he could’ve dipped forward and kissed her hand so easily. Those perfect, delicate fingers that aided Alice in crafting the most beautiful sentences he’d ever heard.
Jack was still reeling, but the more time that passed, the more he seemed to be overflowing with things that he wanted to say to Alice. And his words wouldn’t be nearly as perfect as Alice’s — he understood that — but they’d be sincere.
So fucking sincere that it scared Jack.
Alice only seemed to be concerned with hoping that she got Jack right. That she’d seen him the right way.
“You’re the only person who’s ever seen me,” he blurted out. Once he started, he couldn’t stop.
“God. I might actually be insane — saying that out loud. Admitting that to someone that I just met. A reporter.”
Jack paused, shaking his head preemptively.
“I don’t mean that in a bad way. But. A reporter. You’re here to … I don’t know, write some stuff about my career. Maybe make people feel a little sorry for me. Or make them really hate me. That’s why you’re here.”
Jack was ranting and raving about a whole lot of nothing, but if he wasn’t allowing himself to kiss Alice, he had to fucking find something to do with his mouth, right?
“When I agreed to do this interview, I already knew how it was going to go. Whoever showed up would start asking me about gun legislation and public healthcare and why the Equality Act has never seemed to make it out of committee. Or — I don’t know. They’d grill me about my divorce. They’d push wherever it hurt. How did my marriage only last one year? What’s my relationship like with my father, who is a well known and outspoken conservative? And even though my team laid out some ground rules, ones that ensured that the reporter couldn’t ask about my arrest last December, they would anyway. They’d ask if I had a drinking problem. Or a drug problem. And I’d probably blow up and ruin the whole fucking thing anyway.”
“And instead, I get you.”
Jack scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief. Because — how the fuck?
“Somehow, I get … you.”
Slowly, Jack pumped on the brakes. He slowed down a little. Caught his breath.
“I get you. And maybe you’ve written some stuff about my career, but you’ve also written … that.”
Jack scratched the back of his head, attempting to make sense of it all. No, this didn’t align somehow. If karma was a thing — no. Something was off. This couldn’t be real.
“And when you write something like that … it’s like you’re looking right into my skull somehow. Like you know everything I’ve ever thought or will think. And it’s fucking … terrifying.”
Jack exhaled. He hadn’t noticed that his hands were shaking, from how hard he’d clasped them together. He released before he couldn’t feel his fingers anymore. Hah. That’s what she did to him. Day three.
What would happen on day four?
“Not only are you the best writer in the world, but you might actually be the most powerful person in the world.”
Jack surged forward, a little terrified that his impulsivity had won over. No. He could stay in control here. This was too important. He pressed a hand to the side of Alice’s face. He stared. Scanned her features. The delicate arch of her eyebrows. The bluest, kindest eyes he’d ever seen. He didn’t dare look at her mouth.
“When you write like that,” Jack began, voice low and quiet, “it makes me feel … insane. It makes me feel so good. Powerful. Except — you could ask me to do anything right now, and I would.”
Resign from office? Done.
Buy her a new car? Okay, what else?
Walk into traffic? That’s it?
Jack’s hand remained firmly at the side of Alice’s face, thumb brushing over her cheekbone.
"I almost want you to. Tell me to throw my life away. I will."
He seemed to like that— the bit, about New Mexico. Jack was even shameless enough to fucking nod as Alice spoke.
God.
It took everything within her not to laugh. But that would have been rewarding him! It was best not to acknowledge the behavior; Alice digs deep into herself in order to keep a serious face.
When she reads, it becomes a bit easier, as she's now very occupied with trying to read Jack's expression at the same time.
What was he thinking?
It was very personal, being written about. You had to confront the way you were seen by others— what if Jack didn't like or agree with Alice's perception of him?
She hoped he found it flattering.
She hoped when she spoke of him as quicksilver, kinetic, energetic, that Jack understood it came from a place of excitement, endearment, longing— that Jack and all his energy hit hard, hit Alice in just the right way to make her come alive.
The roar of the waterfall, his hand folded over hers as they danced, the gentle lapping of the pool against her abdomen and the brilliantly endless summer sky. That was all him. The kind of person who had been through so much, was dealing with so fucking much, and yet in the midst of it had invited Alice into his home— had trusted her, opened up to her, and gave so much.
Her gave her energy, inspiration, comfort, and most of all, he gave Alice a craving for more of it. More of him.
He gave Alice hunger and fuel in equal amount, and that confusing contradiction left her with no choice but to write; into the late hours, leg tucked up into her chest, on her phone, or laptop, sometimes on a folded piece of paper.
Alice inhales, and hopes she got it right. If her writing can give him anything, she hopes it's the feeling that Alice sees him.
'I think you’re the best writer in the world.'
Well— what?
What?
That couldn't be right. Alice blinks, as if that would somehow reveal what Jack actually said, but now he's looking at her with something soft, a look that she feels the need to wrap around and protect and covet close to her heart.
He looks so earnest and vulnerable and there and it's making the couch tilt beneath her.
"That— well, that's not true."
Alice huffs. A stunned smile spreads across her face, bewildered and affectionate.
"That's like another thing I've never heard before, and I think it's even crazier coming from you, you really have no idea how that makes me feel—"
She reaches forward, and grasps his shirt at his collarbone for a second, squeezes, still smiling in disbelief, feeling the secondary warmth of his skin. Alice releases, and laughs, drags her palm back over her hair.
Fuck. She felt dizzy. Not just that Jack liked the writing, but he thought this of her. Because the feelings in Alice's chest that already existed kept swelling to the surface, and it was impossible to keep them down, or keep track of them all. It felt mystifying and perfect all at once. There's a specific word that keeps rushing to the surface, like bubbles, and Alice is starting to be able to make the shape of it.
"I do hope I saw you the right way."
"I hope I saw you in a way that you liked. In the real way. Because— when I was writing all that, it was late, and. I don't know. I usually am okay with my writing just existing on it's own, separate from how others see it, but... this one is important. That I got it right. You."
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