#They also need to fix a lot of stupid shit they need to improve curved walls so bad I can barely build yurts at all

[animalcuckllective]

There's something wrong with all of us still playing the sims 4 I think. This game is so fucking broken lol.

[toto-doodles]

First Date

This is for the @danganevents valentines fic exchange :) I was assigned @deadpunkin who wanted komahina fluff! This was my first time doing something like this and It was a cool experience- I hope you have fun reading it! ^^

Hajime Hinata was running late.

This wasn’t a common nor uncommon experience really. Hajime’s most remarkable quality (excluding his abnormally spikey hair) would have to be how average he is. And being late occasionally is just a part of life! That was something anyone could understand and be understanding of, surely..

This is what was repeating through Hajime’s head as he dashed to the bus stop down the street from his apartment complex. Just a little bit further-

“OOF!”

Upon rounding the street corner Hajime collides with an immense and immovable object. This ‘object’ was none other than Nekomaru Nidai.

“Woah, there- What’s the rush!” Nekomaru exclaimed, helping pick Hajime up from off the ground where he had fallen. The Ultimate Team Manager was built like a brick house and running headlong into him made that especially clear.

“I appreciate your enthusiasm, though your form is severely lacking!” He continued, helping brush Hajime off lightly and doing his best to smooth down the spiky mass of hair “Having heart is important but we’ll never reach play offs on that alone. If you really want to improve your run time I can help you devise a solid regiment suited to your build!” At this point Nidai had given up on fixing the mess known as Hajime’s hair and punched his fists together enthusiastically “Just give me the word an-“

“Nidai I am so sorry but also- I do Not have time for this today.” Hajime sputtered out darting around the managers’ form and making a run for it, “We can talk about this another day!” He half-heartedly promised over his shoulder, already trying to calculate how much this detour would affect his time. As he was not the SHSL Mathematician, however, Hajime soon abandoned this line of thought.

Nidai huffs to himself lightly, as the smaller student flees away in a full on sprint, “He must really have to take a shit..”

Across town a lone figure arrives at the door of Jabberwock Java, a local coffee chain renowned for its fun and exotic take on the classic café theme.

-

“Huh. I’m 15 minutes early! That’s just my luck..” He sighed before sitting at one of the outside tables to wait for 6 o’clock. Better than being late, really. Nagito had made sure to leave Hope’s Peak with plenty of time and to take the most secure path available according to Google maps. That way even if was waylaid by criminals or caught in a storm he would have plenty of time to deal with the issue.

Despite emotionally preparing for something unfortunate the entirety of the trip, it had been remarkably easy. Almost frighteningly so.

“A lot can happen in 15 minutes,” Nagito thinks to himself while thoughtfully gazing towards the horizon.

-

He made it! The bus was leaving right as he arrived but due to Hajime’s quick reflexes and the bus driver’s kindness (ie. Running alongside the bus as it started to pull off and knocking on door), he was now seated in the fourth closest seat to the door.

“Finally, something is going right,” Hajime sighs, taking a moment to try and catch his breath. The fellow bus occupants were likely judging him, but he had made it on and that’s what really counts. The person in the next seat over was openly staring daggers at him.

They would probably stop once they realized he wasn’t going to acknowledge them. Sweat dripped down the side of his neck and Hajime wished he had the foresight to bring water.

Or the foresight to just leave on time instead fussing over his stupid outfit for half an hour. Its not like he even wore anything that different from his usual clothes..

“Hajime?..”

Sure, it was a slightly nicer button down. Crisp collar, unlike his every day outfit. And the tie he chose was not the usual green- but a more grey-ish green shade than usual. Not that he bought it specifically for this or anything! He just… needed a new tie.

“Hajime!”

Oh fuck.

So much for ignoring them, “Oh! Hey there Ibuki,” he smiled in what was hopefully a nonchalant manner “What’s up?” He went to lean in to more of a relaxed slouch against the handrail but, upon realizing an outer seat didn’t actually have that, stopped before he could fall into the center aisle.

He could play it cool. Right.

“What’s up with Ibuki?! More like what’s up with Hajime!” She exclaimed loudly, almost certainly drawing unnecessary looks from everyone else on the bus, who hadn’t paid attention to his frantic pounding on the bus window a couple minutes back “Ibuki saw you run from alllllll the way by down the street.”

“Now what could Ibuki’s favorite drummer be doing running so desperately,” She crossed her arms in thought.

“Its- really its no big deal! I was just,” Think Hajime, think “Getting in my steps for the day.” Nailed it.

“Oh!! Ibuki sees,” Here she shot a wide grin, and nodded in a self satisfied manner “And after his steps Hajime always goes to treat himself with some tea! Of course!!”

“Uh.. sure.”

“And of course the best place to get tea is the Hanamura Family Diner!”

Hajime felt his heart drop.

“Which is why you are on a bus alllllll the way to Aoyama!” Ibuki continued, unaware of Hajime’s turmoil “Ibuki still needs to go there one day, but she can never seem to find it! Even when she goes to watch concerts in that area no one ever seems to have heard of it!”

“..This bus is headed where?”

-

Nagito checked his phone. It was only just after 6… Hajime probably just got lost on his way here. At this point it was almost rude to loiter outside without at least going to buy something.

Mind made up Nagito headed inside the café, deciding to order a small drink and stake out a nice spot for when Hajime arrives. He checks his phone again, as a force of habit.

No new messages.

-

After getting off at the next nearest stop and declining Ibuki’s invitation to play ‘Will I get there?’ Hajime has to be completely honest with himself.

This isn’t just a little late anymore. Assuming Nagito arrived on time (and not early as Hajime feared) he would have been waiting for at least 45 minutes now. While the luckster has come a long way from disdainful student he had been (And only seemed to be warming up to Hajime more and more every day), surely, he was pushing the others patience at this point.

Hajime was across town with no way to the café. He should just call and tell him what happened, reschedule for another day and cut his losses.

He reaches into his pocket to retrieve his phone.

Aaaaand finds nothing. Hajime blinks for a bit, before re-checking each and every pocket he has. The search comes up with his wallet, the apartment key, a pack of mint fresh gum, and absolutely nothing else.

“Ughhhhhhh..” He puts his head in hands for a moment and thinks. He had been avoiding checking the time since he first left so as not to psyche himself out too much. It must have been left at home. And if it was lost anywhere else, then… Well that would be a problem for future Hajime.

Current Hajime has very specific problems to deal with. Namely not disappointing the guy he was supposed to meet up with any more than he already has. With renewed energy Hajime stands up and looks over the map located at the stop.

The next bus he needed wasn’t coming for a good while. There must be another way to get there… Suddenly a car with deeply tinted windows pulls up next to Hajime on the curve. The window starts to roll down on the passenger side and Hajime tenses up ever so slightly. If he throws the gum then that should be enough of a distraction to make a run for it if need be.

“Hey Hajime! What are you doing all the way on this side of town?”

“….Fuyuhikyo?”

Behind the Kuzuryu heir Peko waves lightly from the driver seat.

-

Nagito is easygoing in a lot of ways. Life happens and things often out of your control can make keeping plans difficult at times. It was like his luck with its ups and downs and the unpredictable nature of things, honestly. But Nagito is also a realist.

He had his… reservations about this outing from the beginning, and it was becoming increasingly clear that so must have Hajime. It was 7:30 with no calls or messages, and no sign of the spiky haired teenager. Though the timing was unfortunate, he must have finally realized his time would be better spent with almost anyone else. It was an unavoidable outcome really. Nagito was almost surprised it took this long, even with the young man’s stubborn nature.

Either that or something could have happened to Hajime- which was unthinkable. A light shudder wracked his frame at the idea. Nagito would be fine with ignoring whatever this could have been if Hajime is okay. He would have to be okay.

For everything else the universe had taken away from him it should owe him this much at least.

With that Nagito strengthens his resolve to greet Hajime normally tomorrow, as he always does after class. He won’t mention being stood up or talk about waiting on him. He won’t push for more than he deserves.

Though only a reserve course student Hajime had so much hope in his heart. That was really the only way Nagito could put it. He had a way of making everyone around him feel acknowledged and cared for just by being there. It’s really no wonder that he had become such an essential part of the 77th class of Hope’s Peak Academy, despite being an unofficial member.

Though the two had taken a while to get used to each other and only recently started to understand one another, they worked well together. There was a base attraction that only flourished as they shared their stories, love of Hope’s Peak Academy and what it represents, even their deepest dreams with one another.

Or at least that’s what Nagito had thought.  

It had seemed reciprocated if the confession (Could it even be called that?) from Hajime was anything to go by. It had been pretty round about in the way he did it, but the intent seemed clear. His eyes had been bright and cheeks flushed as he mentioned with a forced off-handedness about this café he had been meaning to try, and ‘Gee, wouldn’t it be nice to go together, Nagito?’

Really, the nail in the coffin was Hajime insisting that they do this on a couple’s holiday. Nagito didn’t consider himself to be oblivious but the implications of that seemed... pretty straightforward.

Lost in thought and fidgeting with his long since empty cup he almost doesn’t notice the shadow that crosses his table.

“Hey.” The seat across from him pulls out as a somewhat ruffled looking Hajime takes a seat.

“Sorry to keep you waiting for so long- there was an issue with the bus and misplacing my phone. It was kind of crazy trying to get here honestly!”

Seeing how much of a mess the other boy’s hair was (Which is to say it was slightly worse than usual) and how his tie (..Was that new? It was a silky looking grey-green shade that was endearingly familiar) noticeably askew, that seemed believable. Not that Hajime was the type to lie to protect someone’s feelings, but it was comforting evidence, nonetheless.

“Oh! That sounds rather troublesome,” Nagito answered after a moment “I’m honored you invited me here in the first place, but you really shouldn’t go to such lengths just to meet with me!” He laughed a bit self-consciously.

“I wanted to.” Hajime reply’s immediately. Firmly.

A warm hand grasps Nagito’s own on top of the table. He can feel his heart skip a beat.

“Whether it’s talking about whatever comes to mind or even just saying nothing at all,” Hajime pauses as if searching for the right words “being with you is.. good, Nagito. You are really important to me.”

As Nagito begins to flush at the unexpected praise, at the counter across the room Fuyuhikyo and Peko order a couple of green tea’s and a bag of fried dough cookies to go.

“It’s about time,” Fuyuhikyo huffs lightly nodding at their friends joined hands. Peko hums in agreement, collecting the sweets bag and passing a cookie over.

“They’ve only been dancing around each other for the past three years. Sheesh, were we ever that insufferable?” Peko gives him a look that speaks volumes, and the two leave Jabberwock Java and the soon to be couple behind.

[studyinrevolution]

Things I learned at my first semester of university

1) keep your dorm clean 2) your body is sacred. Take care of it because your health isn't a given. Don't take risks with it. 3) your parents give you advice because they believe it is in your best interest. Reject the dogmatic aspects, but it's alright to overlap in your values. 4) If you have access to free birth control and it is safe for you to use, go on it even if you aren't sexually active. You may change your mind and you can't prevent sexual assault but that is something you do have control over. 5) it's alright to go a little crazy 6) there are very few mistakes in life that stick with you permanently 7) the end of the world is not the end of the world 8) always use a condom. So much regret on this one. 9) just because you don't use a condom one time doesn't mean "the damage is done" it might very well be but with things like STIs or pregnancy it might not be the first time that messes you up. 10) Get tested. Get tested. Get tested. Shit is scary but you have to do it. Even married couples should be getting tested every six months. People with multiple partners should be getting tested once a month or in between partners depending on what comes first. 11) losing your virginity to the wrong person isn't tragic 12) be selective about who you share your body with. Sleep with as many people as you like but if something feels off about someone don't let them touch you 13) sexual assault can take a lot of different forms and not all of them are traumatic or physically violent, but that doesn't make it not legitimate 14) always pee after sex. UTIs are the actual worst 15) straight up I'd rather have Chlymidea than an UTI (and I've had both) 16) beautiful, kind, wonderful people still get STIs. People who have slept with the entire world go their whole lives without contracting an STI while people who sleep with just one person can contract an STI. It's not fair, and one night can cause permanent damage. This isn't meant to be fear mongering it's meant to re-enforce #6 and remind you that people with STIs aren't necessarily dirty or loose people. 17) Some people lie about getting tested. You should ask for proof. Or at least be very sure you can trust the person you're sleeping with. If they get offended, then they don't respect your body enough to help you protect it. 18) boys are not more important than school 19) your boyfriend's problems are not your problems. You can support him but you don't need to take on his issues because you have enough on your own. 20) "what does this say about me?" Is a really important question to ask yourself sometimes 21) abusive people exist. 22) wonderful people do horrible things sometimes 23) crowdsourcing your problems to friends is really great. It helps having people who love you give sober second thought to what you're doing/thinking/feeling. Added bonus: when you need to vent you don't have to catch everyone up on the drama 24) if you're ashamed to tell your friends what you're doing, you shouldn't be doing it. 25) tinder is evil. Not that great people don't exist on there or anything. That is after all how I met my boyfriend, but there's also some really sketchy people on there too and honestly it's a miracle I haven't been murdered or abducted yet. 26) if you're not dead/pregnant/ diseased, you're really lucky and your problems are most likely temporary setbacks 27) if you are dead/pregnant/diseased there's treatment and resources that exist to help you cope (minus the dead thing but if you're dead you're not reading this) 30) most of the world has nothing against you 31) most of the world also doesn't have a reason to help you unless you give them one/ are caught by a fortunate stranger 32) don't change who you are fundamentally for anyone but yourself 33) have a life outside your relationships 34) if a breakup is the most problematic thing in your life then be so grateful that you are so blessed (but also your emotions are valid and it's alright to still feel sorrow) 35) It's not okay to quit 36) really shitty things happen and it's actually kinda hilarious. Laugh, cry, do what you need to do to process and then if you can, find an exit route. 37) List out your priorities and re-evaluate when necessary 38) loyalty in any form is so underrated both when given and received. Cherish it both from yourself and others. 39) you're never as alone as you think you are 40) if you don't like a part of your life, take action to fix it or find other things to improve upon if that is impossible. 41) breakups are rough but there's a difference between giving yourself time to heal and consigning yourself to an ivory tower in order to pine over a lost love until your knight in shining armour arrives. Recognize that and no one can tell you whether you need to wait two days or two years to get to a place where you can date again 42) people make stupid choices due to sexual frustration. Invest in a vibrator. 43) your love life doesn't have to resemble your friends. Just because they're having lots-no sex/dates/ relationships doesn't mean you have to 44) Losing your virginity is awkward. This is fine. 45) it's okay to laugh during sex but make sure you tell your partner why so they don't think it's about them. Even if it's about some random thought or nerves it's better to be honest then to let them think that they're making you laugh because of the sex or their body. 46) balance is so vital. You need to find time for responsibilities and play. You need to have healthy food and junk food. You need to have just enough chaos to entertain you without being reckless. Embrace freedom and place boundaries. Everyone's balance is different. Find yours and it's okay to lose your balance in order to understand what is missing 47) judge people too harshly, and you won't get to hear the whole story. 48) sex has a learning curve. Your partner can be terrible or you can be terrible in bed and then improve 49) silk scarves cover hickies and don't usually need to be taken off in public. 50) there are so many wonderful humans in this world- don't miss them but also recognize that you're a wonderful human too and make sure that the people you invest in appreciate that

[yochess]

2) The Power of Habit

My Introduction: The next book I’ve decided to read was The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. According to Duhigg, the reasons why I have bad habits such as 1) procrastinating, 2) being compulsive, 3) not brushing my teeth as often, 4) consuming weed daily, 5) munching on an unholy amount of chocolate (10+ servings somedays), 6) acting out and resenting my parents for my shortcomings, ... 1000) barely exercising is because I have been programmed by my environment to develop those habits. He is claiming these behaviors (bad habits) can be changed. On one hand, I think a lot of my bad habits are formed due to me potentially having ADD. I basically believe it is easier for me than others to develop bad habits. I think I am by nature an instant gratification monkey. I love to procrastinate and I am also very compulsive. Hell, I fucken turned a compulsive addiction that is all about instant gratification into a fucken career. OTOH Duhigg is claiming bad habits are within my control to change. He did not put genetics into the equation. If I can somehow strategize to minimize bad habits and replace bad habits with good habits, then I will not snowball myself into disaster. Even if I do have ADD, with the right knowledge and resources, I can compensate for what my genetics lack by just putting in the extra effort. I mean everything and everyone is just on a spectrum somewhere right? I just happen to be closer to the tail end (the bad side) when it comes to forming habits. For all I know I don’t even have ADD and I’m just looking for excuses on all my shortcomings. Whatever the case, I believe I have the knowledge and resources to improve this area of my life. I have to fucken work on this. Hell... EVERYONE has areas in their life where they are on the bad side of the curve. It would be insanely stupid on every level for me to say I don’t have to work hard on something just because I was born with some kind of deficit. That is self-entitlement. The world owes me shit. If I can fix it then I SHOULD fix it. It is STUPID and IRRATIONAL for me to lay around doing shit and go around blaming genetics. On November 22, I signed up for a 3-day trial at 24 Hour Fitness. On November 25, I applied for a membership. I’ve walked/ran 2-3+ miles at least 5 times already since the free trial. I haven’t done ANY weed in over 3 weeks after daily consumption since it became legalized in California. I barely ate junk food since. I have been brushing my teeth most mornings and nights. I have been making a conscious effort to connect towards my folks. I mean I’m not even sure what empathy is anymore and if it is just some fuzzy wuzzy buzz word. I’ll eventually read about it. There are still a bunch of unfinished tasks on my TODO list, but I have been making a conscious effort to complete them. Lately I feel hopeful. I am motivated. I am trying. I am no longer blaming my genetics. I am no longer blaming others. I am not going to lie to myself and believe I’m the victim. I am no longer making excuses. I’ll continue to look for ways to find solutions instead of blaming a condition. I’ll stop dwelling in the past. I can only be sorry for what has yet to happen yet. I am human. I know I am hard on myself, but I got to be. Otherwise I will not grow. I also need to forgive myself when I fail. Hehe! =) ——————–————— Summary - Part 1: The Habits of Individuals Chapter 1: The Habit Loop In 1993 Eugene Pauly suffered permanent brain damage. He had significantly impaired memory, but surprised scientists with his ability to learn and perform new behaviors. The scientists learned that his basal ganglia (located in the center of the brain) was left unimpaired. This led to experiments on rats, which confirmed that this part of the brain is responsible for storing habits. Duhigg explains that the formation of a habit, known as the Habit Loop consists of three parts: 1) the cue - anticipation (eg. ringing noise from slot machines, smell of cigarettes, sight and noise of people having fun at a party) 2) the routine - an automatic process that can be physical, mental, or emotional (eg. pulling the slot machine, smoking a cigarette, drinking alcohol) 3) the reward - craving (eg. winning some money, the high off nicotine, having fun at a party) Over time, this loop becomes more and more automatic. Duhigg goes on saying habits are very hard to break, because it is an automatic process. He also says this is why it is hard to create exercise habits or change what we eat, because once we develop a routine such as sitting on the couch (instead of running) or snacking whenever we pass a doughnut box, those patterns will always remain in our head. Below is a quote I find inspirational and full of hope: ”We’ve done experiments where we trained rats to run down a maze until it was a habit, and then we extinguished the habit by changing the placement of the reward. Then one day we’ll put the reward in the old place, and put in the rat, and, by golly, the old habit will reemerge right away. Habits never really disappear. They’re encoded into the structure of our brain, and that’s a huge advantage for us, because it would be awful if we had to relearn how to drive after every vacation. The problem is that your brain can’t tell the difference between bad and good habits, and if you have a bad one, it’s always lurking there, waiting for the right cues and rewards.” - Ann Graybiel, a scientist at MIT who’s done many basal ganglia experiments (pg. 20). Chapter 2: The Craving Brain The reward is the craving we seek before performing the routine. It is what initially drives us to perform the routine. Once this Habit Loop is done enough times, the habit is formed, and we will just perform it automatically from just seeing the cue. Scientists have studied this behavior by examining it on monkeys. They would give Julio the monkey blackberry juice (the reward) every time he touches the lever (the routine). This behavior eventually became habitual to the point where Julio’s brain would anticipate the reward by just seeing the monitor (the cue). Scientists then stopped rewarding Julio blackberry juice and not surprisingly, Julio would still touch the lever every time he sees the screen over and over again (pg. 44-49). Duhigg uses numerous examples on how numerous companies capitalized on this aspect of human behavior during the 20th century (eg. smoking, advertising). P&G marketed Fabreze by telling its audience the product adds a nice smell (the reward) after cleaning (the habit). Shockingly this method saved Fabreze, which can be read about here. Chapter 3: The Golden Rule of Habit Change The Golden Rule of habit change is to change the routine, while keeping the same cue and the same reward. This is obviously easier said than done. Perhaps smokers can replace the high from nicotine with coffee. Perhaps they can just exercise instead.  When alcoholics initially drank, the cue is probably seeing others socializing, and the reward is to socialize with them. The routine is of course to drink until blackout drink. Perhaps a better way to perform this habit is to go socialize somewhere that does not involve drinking. One example would be to to join a tennis club. The cue and reward is still the same. It will just take some time for the new and better routine to replace the old one. ——————–————— Summary - Part 2: The Habits of Successful Organizations Chapter 4: Keystone Habits The key takeaway is organizations get their members to have one key habit. This habit in turn spirals and snowballs into other good habits, which in turn increases productivity. He uses numerous examples such as Alcoa with safety. Once safety became a priority, productivity soared. Some keystone habits on an individual level would be exercising and writing. For me, reading makes me feel incredibly good about myself. I am not giving a fuck what others are saying. More examples of keystone habits can be found here and here. ”Once a small win has been accomplished, forces are set in motion that favor another small win. Small wins fuel transformative changes by leveraging tiny advantages into patterns that convince people that bigger achievements are within reach.” - Duhigg (pg. 112). Chapter 5: Starbucks and the Habit of Success Starbucks believes that willpower is a learnable skill. Employees are trained the LATTE system. Chapter 6: The Power of a Crisis There are tons of bad habits and rivalry going on within organizations, which results in less productivity. Numerous examples are given in which a crisis is a catalyst for drastic and positive changes. Chapter 7: How Target Knows What You Want Before You do In the past, big companies used small bag of tricks (tactics) to take advantage of its customers. The issue with these tactics is there was no one size fit all. Target used big data to predict who’s pregnant. Once they succeeded in this, they sent out coupons of baby items to the future mothers. This gives them a huge advantage within its competition, because they understand that once a big change happens in one’s life (such as becoming pregnant), then new habits (shopping at target) would emerge. More can be read about Target here. ——————–————— Summary - Part 3: The Habits of Societies Chapter 8: Saddleback Church and the Montgomery Bus Boycott I skimmed through this chapter, because I found it boring. The Montgomery Bus Boycott succeeded, because it tied people together. Even if one did not want to get involved, they would feel the pressure from their community due to mutual ties. More can be read about here.  Rick Warren who created the Saddleback Church believes it is important for its followers to have good habits in faith. More of this stuff can be read about here. Chapter 9: The Neurology of Free Will This chapter is more philosophical and focuses on the philosophy behind the autonomy of bad habits. One guy killed his wife due to night terror. He was unconscious when he performed this act. One woman lost millions and owed the casino money because she could not stop gambling. The guy who murdered his wife was not criminally charged, while the woman who owed the casino money was criminally charged. Both actions were pretty much autonomous. The difference is the guy had no idea what the outcome would be (murder), while the woman was clearly aware (owing money).  I think this basically implies society holds us responsible for our bad habits if we are aware of its negative outcome. On the final pages, the author gives a passage written by David Foster Wallace: “There are these two young fish swimming along and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says ‘Morning, boys. How’s the water?’ And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes ‘What the hell is water?’” Duhigg goes on saying that the water is habits, the unthinking choices and invisible decisions that surround us everyday. I think what this means is to be aware of our habits, the things we are automated to do. ——————–————— Final Thoughts Personally I don’t believe in free will and I think our actions are deterministic. So far I see nothing wrong with this statement. The thing is this thinking that I’m destined to a certain doom has led me to not even attempt to do things. I just say stupid shit like “What’s the point if the probability is low.” I make excuses like “I can’t help it, because that’s just the way I am.” “I’m depressed, I can’t help it.” “I have ADD, I can’t control my impulses.” “I am addicted to marijuana, I can’t help it.” “I love sugar too much, I can’t quit.” “I’m bad at this, I should not try it.” The thing is that does not give me a pass to not even fucken try. Trying to change my course of action does not equate to believing in free will. I should not let what I think is my doom control my life. I’ve learned something very valuable here. I have to believe in what I’m doing no matter what.

[rwbyremnants]

=Chapter 2

Watching random shows was a wonderful ice-breaker activity for the two of them. All four of them, really; Dad and Summer sat by each other on the couch, and Ruby and Yang cuddled together on the loveseat under a cozy blanket. It made the most sense, and the elder two kept glancing over and smiling at them. In their book, they were a parenting success.

Meanwhile, Yang was in hell.

"This is the good part," Ruby whispered as she snuggled in closer, causing Yang to fight down an obvious grimace. Not because she felt bad… but because she felt too, too good. Smelled good. Of course it was probably mostly because she had only ever been on a handful of dates, and ones that never went very well… for one reason or another. She knew that, and tried to tell herself that so she would stop thinking about how their legs shouldn't be tangled up together.

"Really good," Yang managed to whisper. She knew she sounded off, and that the comment wasn't really about the show, but she made herself clear her throat and rest her chin on Ruby's head. It earned her a giggle, so it wasn't too bad. "You guys watch this a lot?"

"Nah," their dad said in his carefree voice, sandwiching his wife's hand between his own. "We've only seen it once before. Just thought you might get a kick out of it."

"There's soooo much to watch these days," Ruby echoed, wriggling against Yang's front. It seemed that because she was taller and elder, she was elected to be the "big spoon". It made sense, even if it made things more difficult for her in the time being. "Who has time for it all?"

By the end of the episode, Yang was biting the inside of her cheek to suppress a reaction. The minute the credits rolled, she forced herself to be casual about tapping Ruby on the shoulder.

"Pee break."

"Oh! You got it!" Sitting up, she held onto the back of the loveseat to let Yang extract herself. Every movement was like a dance, and every brush of skin against skin a tease. She had to collect herself.

When she reached the bathroom, she finally let herself take a breather. That was all she needed. Just to get out of there. She let her brain flood her with thoughts of the enticing young woman, soft curves pressing down into her, smelling like roses and sunshine…

But before her body could do more than respond very slightly, craving more of Ruby, she took a deep breath and released it as she told herself a few things.

"Sister," she said under her breath as she finished peeing. "That's a sister-butt and sister-boobs. A sister-face you're thinking about being so pretty. We have different moms, but both of us came from Dad's balls." That mental image helped a lot, because flinching at it curdled her stomach. "Okay. Okay, good; let's… get back out there. Go, team!"

Feeling stupid for having to do all that, she turned and stomped back to the living room.

The rest of their evening entertainment was only barely more tolerable. Ruby was still all too inviting, but this time, she was a little more prepared for how it would feel so she could ignore that with more success than the last time. Then before she knew it, Summer was yawning, and Yang decided to feign one of her own.

"Looks like you girls should be in bed," Taiyang said as he patted his wife's side. Then he stood, yawning himself. "And so should I. Don't fight over the bathroom, okay?"

"We won't!" Ruby promised him as they shuffled off, and she and Yang sat up. Once they were a little ways away, she whispered, "You can use it first. I'm usually up a little late, messing around online."

"You sure? It's… no big deal, seriously."

"Go ahead. I'll find something else to watch."

Now she felt guilty for leaving Ruby behind. Still, she did want to call an end to the slow torture that was being crammed into the loveseat with her. "Alrighty. But… we'll do more stuff tomorrow, right?"

That seemed to help, because Ruby's smile widened, became more genuine. "Yep! And I'm sure we can think of so much stuff! Like, I can take you around town, to the comic book store, or we can do the beach — or just hang out here, I have a ton of YouTube videos in my favourites if you wanted to flip through those. Some of them are hilarious!"

Relaxing, she folded her arms across her chest and smiled down at her sister. "Adorable." Then, realising she had said it out loud, she covered, "You just get so excited about stuff, it's cute."

"I do?" Shit, why did she have to slip up and call her cute?! Instantly, Ruby was looking a little flustered - the same way she would be if Ruby said something like that. Smiling awkwardly, biting her lip as she looked down at where her feet were tenting the blanket. "Y-yeah, I've been told I'm kinda super-nerdy. But if you think it's in a cute way, I guess it could be worse, right?"

"Totally." Still kicking herself for the slip, she cleared her throat. "But uh, yeah, anyway, I probably won't have to bail on you so early tomorrow night. Just… flying and all that, right? I'm jetlagged, my body's telling me it's four hours later."

"Nah, I get it. I'll see you in the morning!"

All the time she was getting ready for bed, Yang was pushing thoughts out of her mind. This one and that one, and all of them worse than the one before. After a while, they began to ease up, but she still felt like she couldn't relax or she would fall victim to her own imagination.

She did feel a lot better in her soft cotton shorts and crawling into the bed. However, she had forgotten a little detail: the bed smelled like Ruby.

For a little while, she couldn't make anything happen in the way of sleep. All she could do was roll around, drinking in the enticing aroma. True, it wasn't deeply ingrained from the very short stint the girl had spent in her sheets… but it was enough to fill her head with too many thoughts. Ones that she had no distraction from.

Everything about Ruby was warm and beautiful. The image her mind conjured was Ruby laying there, playing with her phone while Yang could slide her arms around her flawless body, slender and toned but still soft…

Rolling over, she faced the wall and tried to stop thinking, but her mind wanted to think about full hips and slender calves, an ample chest. Sweet lips that were so prone to giant smiles when she got excited. Yang found herself also wanting to find out more about her life, what she did with herself when she wasn't cracking down on entrance exams and all that. That was her one saving grace; at least she didn't think of her as nothing but an object.

'But you shouldn't think of her as an object at all! Get it together, Yang! Quit being such a weirdo about your step-half-sister before it gets any worse!'

Around and around her mind went. No amount of self-shaming could get her to stop thinking about the strange turn her first day in Los Angeles had taken. But at least she had the next morning to look forward to. Maybe that would be an improvement.

Probably not, but maybe.

If anything, the next day was worse. Not in the same ways, but the first thing in the morning did nothing to help.

When she woke up, Yang instantly knew that it would keep getting worse because she had been dreaming about Ruby. Nothing new or super detailed, but she usually didn't dream about people she had just met unless she was attracted to them. Lo and behold, Ruby crept into her subconscious.

Even worse, she sat up and looked down at her pelvis. Feeling the heat rising from that area. This was going to be a problem. Should she take care of it now? That would be terrible! Especially with what she was thinking about! But she didn't know if she could risk trying to slip out the door and down the hallway for a shower…

She was still debating that, staring between it and the clothes laid out on her suitcase, when there was a brief knock. She had been about to ask who it was-

When it burst open, revealing Ruby's smiling face. "Morning! Figured you wouldn't wanna sleep… too…"

Of course, her eyes would go straight down. Straight to the very obvious bulge in the front of Yang's shorts. How could they not with Yang's hand wrapped around it, as if trying to hold it in place so it didn't fly away?

"R-Ruby!" she began, laughing nervously. "U-ummm…"

"My fault!" she squeaked instantly, slapping a hand over her eyes. "I barely knocked, I'm so sorry, it's- there's no lock on this door, I sh-should have- anyway! Breakfast is almost r-ready, whenever you… yeah!"

Then she was gone in a flurry of movement.

As Yang dressed hastily in last night's clothes, to get to Ruby as fast as possible, she felt her pulse pick up. This couldn't be happening. She would go fix this, right away!

When she opened the door to chase Ruby down, hopefully to catch her before she got all the way to the kitchen, she found she was still standing just outside the door and leaning against the hallway wall, a hand pushed into her blushing face as her wide eyes stared from her wall to the one on the other side. In fact, she almost tripped from trying to cut off her own momentum. The minute she saw Yang there, she turned to her and looked more shocked.

"P-please don't be mad," she whispered fearfully, backing toward the stairs. "I- I'm sorry, it'll never happen agai-"

"I'm not mad!" she interrupted her. "I… I didn't mean for you to see…"

At that, Ruby looked away again, still red as her forelock. "Y-yeah, you looked… like you were in the middle of something? That's my fault, I didn't mean to interrupt!"

Gritting her teeth, she forced herself to go on. "No, I swear, it wasn't what it looked like! It was just… I was trying to figure out what to do until it went away. M-maybe I should have got up right then and started getting my shit together for a shower, then you might not have seen… um, seen that."

"Oh, so it's just, like… because it's the morning?" she asked, swallowing and glancing at Yang again. When she nodded, the shorter girl closed her eyes. "Okay. Just saying, you looked ready to go…"

"Ready to 'go' is right." When Ruby let out a squeak, she elaborated, "PEE! I have to go pee, sorry! That's… that's part of it, somehow, I guess? I don't really understand anatomy…"

Lowering her voice even more, she asked, "So that's what it looks like when your dick is full of pee?"

"N-no," she hedged, feeling her own cheeks get a little hotter at Ruby calling it by a specific name. "It's more like… having a full bladder presses on another thing… oh, nevermind, I don't know what I'm talking about, but having to pee in the morning makes it harder to get rid of… of that."

"Okay. But how can you pee if it's sticking straight up? Do you have to, like… jerk off first so you don't pee in your own face?"

Eyes wide, she just stared at Ruby until Ruby looked even more embarrassed somehow, especially given how embarrassed she was before. How could they be having this conversation?!

"It's not like that, exactly… and I can still kinda move it around and point it at the toilet, even when I'm… h-hard."

She cleared her throat, trying not to think about still being hard while having the conversation. This was the most awkward she'd felt since having to shower with the whole women's basketball team. Luckily, her school was very open and understanding, and liberal, so they ended up settling everything and letting her behave as any other young woman. She made sure to never shower when there was only one other girl in there so she wouldn't get accused of trying anything; it was like that old saying, "an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure". But a couple of times, she couldn't completely suppress a physical reaction and she got a few squeals or giggles from her teammates.

"And it can pee while it's hard? Sorry, I, um… I think I learned some of this in health class, but-"

"No, no, it's okay," she half-laughed. It was better that they were talking about simple things like this than acknowledging how weird it was to have a raging boner in front of your half-sibling. "And… it's not easy, but I can totally do it, don't worry."

Nodding, Ruby looked down between their bodies at the little tent in her pants. It would be less noticeable through the multiple layers, but if someone knew to look for it, impossible to miss. Yang was also trying not to look at the way Ruby's cheeks were glowing, or the two little points standing out against her pink tank top. That was just a byproduct of this weird situation; not that Ruby was…

Nope. Not going down that road.

"You should go downstairs," Yang finally said.

"What about you? It… I mean, is it really going to go away when you pee?"

"Probably. If not, I guess I'll jerk off, like you said." When a little yelp sounded deep in Ruby's throat, she bowed her head and whispered, "S-sorry, that was kind of gross, wasn't it?"

"No, it's no big deal, I just… this isn't stuff I know anything about, it's all kinda new! I mean… this is the first time I've seen one. W-well… a real one, actually hard in front of me."

At that, Yang swallowed, trying to pull the hem of her shirt down over it. No such luck, it just bounced around a little and her shirt stayed where it was. Ruby was mesmerised, not quite knowing what she was watching.

"You're not seeing one now; it's just in my pants. One day, you'll see the real thing live and in person, I'm sure, and it'll be a lot more interesting than me pitching a tent."

"Uh-huh." They were both quiet for a few seconds. "I… I'm supposed to go downstairs, right?"

"Yeah."

"Good. So… why can't I go?"

Licking her lips, she glanced toward the staircase. Any second now, one of Ruby's parents would call for her to see what was taking so long. "I'll go to the bathroom, then you'll go. Um, try not to blush this much when you leave?"

"Blush? Oh god, am I blushing?" Feeling her cheeks, she looked up into Yang's eyes with wide ones. "S-sorry, it's just… I've never seen one, like I said, and I know it's just my sister and it's just in your pants, but this is really…"

"I know!" Yang hissed. "And the longer you stare at it the harder it gets, so can you go?"

"Me looking at it's making you-" But she cut herself off, swallowing and holding up a hand. "Never mind! I'm really sorry!"

And then Ruby was skipping downstairs. Yang watched her go, so she was able to see her stop and take a few breaths, trying to calm down. They exchanged a glance, and she smiled apologetically… so Yang flashed her own sheepish grin. She didn't want Ruby to think she was really mad at her; frustrated was not the same thing as mad.

Once in the bathroom, the blonde gripped the sink and took a few deep breaths. WHY did Ruby have to come in right then?! Why did she have to keep looking at it? Now she couldn't make it go away for anything in the world! But at the same time, she really didn't want to jerk off while thinking about her own sister, either!

After peeing and there still being no change, she gave up and went back to get her clothes to take a shower. Under the running water, she was able to finally let some of the heat go… barely. The time and space did it more than the water; she was able to do her best to forget Ruby being so close, her nipples trying to tear their way through her shirt as she kept asking more and more questions about her morning wood…

And then she was hard again, and trying not to break down in tears.

Finally, she was clean and in a less "overcome" mood, and she could head down to join the rest of the family. All in all, she felt a lot better. She had been thinking of herself as a monster who didn't have any self-control, but obviously she did. Otherwise, she would have said or done something bad to Ruby, right? The girl was too curious for her own good, and felt too safe with Yang. That alone made her absolutely determined not to let this… whatever it was make things weirder than they already were. Much less for anything to happen.

But the minute she saw Ruby sitting at the table, leg jittering up and down in a nervous tick as she sawed her way through pancakes, she knew her determination might not be enough.

"Good morning," Summer told her in a gentle voice as she set a plate down in the empty seat. Her own short hair still looked great, even that early in the day. Their haircuts being so similar only further strengthened the similarities; her mother simply looked a little older and a little less Asian. "We were wondering if you'd be up anytime soon."

"I'm up, I'm up," Yang said, stretching her arms. She had been going to wear something cute and fun like a skirt, but in light of recent events, she put on some sweats with the word "PINK" down the leg. They could conceal a little more if it became necessary.

"Sorry about walking in on you changing," Ruby said with a sheepish grin. She saw what she did there; gave an excuse for her looking all flustered. "Still, you know I didn't see anything, right?"

Rolling her eyes, Yang played along. "Yeah, and I told you it's no big deal. Just wait after you knock until I say 'come in' next time, okay?"

"My shy little girl," her dad chuckled with a wide smile. That was one thing that she could say on behalf of her dad; he might have trouble connecting with her now, but he had been a lot more supportive of her transition than a lot of dads would be. So was her mother. At first, she had accused her of doing it for attention, but she never said it was "a sin" or "disgusting" or anything like that. Once they had talked it out, cried it out, she was behind her "new" daughter a hundred percent. In that regard, Yang knew she was very lucky.

"Kind of a matching set," Summer said, coming over to sit in his lap and kiss him on the cheek. Ruby's gagging noise went unnoticed by both of them. "You should have seen Ruby when she got to the table; red as a strawberry. It was so cute!"

"Y-yeah, cute," Yang echoed with a weak laugh, while Ruby was groaning and dropping and her head onto her arms.

"So, what are you two peas in a pod up to today?" Dad asked. "I'm off to work and your mom has her Etsy stuff to work on, so that's gonna leave you footloose and fancy free."

As Ruby sat up and they shared a look, Yang tried to imagine what they could be doing. Then she instantly stopped imagining and blurted, "Whatever Ruby wants."

That got her smiling wider, and Yang felt her heart flutter again. Damn, why was it that easy?!

"Well… let's do the mall, and then the beach? Should fill up a day pretty well. Oh, and on the way home we could get shave ice from this great spot I know!"

"Um, okay." That set off a new concern, one which only partially related to their weird morning. Bathing suits. She did have one that was meant to "pad" things, but it wouldn't really work if she got turned on in public. It was a slight help, not magical. Of course, she was typically really good at making that kind of reaction go away… but apparently, her step-sis made that more difficult.

Misreading Yang's uncertainty, she asked, "Not a fan of shave ice?"

"N-no, I am! It's, uh, it's great!" Then she glanced at the parents, glad to see Summer had finally moved back to her own chair, before saying, "I'm just… nervous about a city I don't know, and that you'll get bored. I'm not as much fun as I look." To illustrate her point, she held up some of her hair. Blondes didn't always have more fun.

"Don't worry about that," Ruby scoffed with an easier smile. "I'll take care of you; I've lived here practically my whole life, and I learned to drive in this traffic. I got your back, sis!"

Bashful again, she nodded and laughed, "Well, who could argue with that? I'm in."

"Glad to hear it," Summer laughed as she dug into her fresh fruit. "That way I can get a little of my work done, and your father won't have to worry about you two tearing up the house."

"Moooom, we're not five," Ruby groaned.

That got Dad to point at her and say, "Definitely not. So watch what you do out there; you're adults and you have to be responsible. Take care of my other baby - and you take care of her, too, Yang."

"Oh, I will," she promised. That was the only priority on her list now; to take care of Ruby instead of doing anything they would regret.

"Soooooo…"

As they drove down the road away from the house, Ruby tried to kick off the conversation. Yang appreciated the effort; she was awful at this. She wanted to apologise, and to yell at Ruby for making the situation worse, and to ask what she thought about that morning. She wanted to do a lot of things all at once, but was afraid of the answers too much to go through with it.

"So."

"Um… do you like music?"

Blinking, she looked back over to see Ruby's sunglasses pointed at her. "What kind of a question is that? Doesn't everybody?"

"I don't know," Ruby croaked, sinking back down into her seat.

'Good job, Yang,' she reprimanded herself silently. 'You're attacking her because you feel guilty. Woman up.' Then she cleared her throat and tried again.

"Sorry. I'm just… still really… this morning has been weird."

"Yeah. I mean… I don't know, I think it was funny? But also exciting, but also… you know what? 'Weird' was a good word, let's stick with it."

"It's been awhile since I've had anyone just stare at me like that. I didn't know what to do; it wasn't like you were doing anything bad, just… making me kinda feel self-conscious, which made it impossible to get it to… to…"

"To go away?" Shrugging, Ruby pulled up to a stop sign. "Well, the good news is you took care of that in the bathroom, right? So… maybe it won't happen again tomorrow morning. Or, um… I don't know, but I've heard that it's not as bad for a while if you take care of it?"

Nodding, Yang made sure she was looking out the window instead of at Ruby. "Yeah, sometimes. Except… I didn't take care of it."

"Huh?" A pause. "You didn't? But I thought-"

"I couldn't, okay? It just… it would have been too weird." She wanted to mention that the weird part would be the subject of her thoughts while doing it, but decided to leave that out. "So I just kinda… waited for it to die down, then until it disappeared. That's all that took me so long."

"Oh. Well, I guess if it worked… but I mean, if you have to, you have to." After a second, she chanced a giggle. "It was funny when you tried to cover it with your shirt and your shirt wasn't long enough."

A groan escaped her as she sank down further. "I feel so dumb right now…"

"Don't," Ruby laughed as she reached over to put her hand on Yang's forearm. "You didn't look dumb. Not at any point, okay? Just… awkward a little, and cute, and upset sometimes."

"Cute?"

Drawing her hand away, but probably just to turn the wheel, she went on, "Y-yeah. I mean, that blush was really pretty in your cheeks, Yang. I'm just sorry it had to happen because you were embarrassed about your boner."

"Can we stop talking about this?" Yang sighed wearily.

"Okay, okay. Music?"

Ruby reached for the radio, and Yang only nodded, so she turned it on to something fun and upbeat. Nothing suited her better. Resisting glancing over at her to enjoy how sweet and beautiful she was with the sun kissing her skin, even when she looked a little put out from the way their conversation had gone, Yang just gazed out the window and hoped the day would improve.

[luvleekaotix-imagines]

Tradition (Reader x HanzoShimada)

A/N: ft. you poor friend who gets beaten up every year. Inspired by this post. He tries okay. HE TRIES. THAT’S VERY IMPORTANT. Anyway I dunno I just needed to write something since I haven’t in a few days. Whoooooops.

Hanzo was wondering if he would see you lurking again this year. He wondered when his annual tradition had become your annual tradition too.

“Takeshi, you got this—”

Ah, there was your voice.

“—I doubt it… I don’t know maybe I should quit. I’m the only one who even keeps trying.”

“It’s because you’re obviously the most diligent clan member!” You exclaimed. You absolutely would not let your friend’s confidence drop any more than it already had. “Come on, chin up, it’s about time.” You slapped your friend on the back with a wide grin and dashed to get to the high ground. “I’ll be watching from a safe space, cheering you on.”

“That doesn’t make me feel any better.” Takeshi grumbled and fixed his suit before turning around to resume his patrol.

Yes, today was the day. 

Hanzo was to make his yearly trip to Shimada castle and pay his respects. Honestly, there were only a handful of guards around, one of which was Takeshi and it was highly likely that he was the only person who was going to take the patrol seriously.

As in, he would likely be the only one who would try to stop Hanzo. Everyone else was going to walk away as soon as they spotted the archer. It wasn’t like Hanzo didn’t do this every damned year and all he did was pay his respects and then quietly leave. Shit, showing up for patrol was just a crappy formality at this point.

The previous year had been the one year you hadn’t shown up and it was for a stupid reason—you had been sick. Takeshi had gotten his butt kicked with everyone else and he ended up getting grumpy at you even though you had a legitimate reason not to be there. Okay, maybe you weren’t meant to be there anyway because technically you were a civilian, but come on. You weren’t going to leave your friend alone during his annual time of need of moral support.

The year you were missing had also been the year Hanzo had seen Genji again and since then, he had decided this would be his final year to pay respects; it was time he moved on and made his choice.

The archer stepped through the gate that had been left open. Wow, they really weren’t trying this year, huh?

“Yo Hanzo! Loving your new digs—hey, did you get some piercings?!” You leant out the open window and waved without much care. It was likely he knew you were there anyway. “Looking sliiiiiiick!” You continued to crow with a cackle.

“You’re supposed to be cheering for me.” Takeshi yelled up at you as he stepped forward with his shoulders slumped. His heart wasn’t in it this time, although who would really ever want a yearly ass kicking? “Master Shimada.” He droned by way of greeting.

Hanzo’s lips curved in a polite smile. “Takeshi. It is good to see you again.” He bowed his head to the guard before turning his gaze your way. He lifted a hand in a casual salute. “And you, my dear observer.” There was an odd friendship between the two of you. He understood that you were around to support your friend who tried very hard to do his duty and thusly he didn’t really consider you an enemy. You were a neutral party, only an observer to the situation and he was fine with that. “Thank you for your compliments.”

“Ohh you are welcome, Hanzo!” You did an ‘oh you’ gesture with a wide grin on your face. “Okay, ignore me because if you keep looking my way I’m going to get flustered and say things I shouldn’t. I’m really digging your new look.”

Takeshi was floored. “Why are you even here if you’re just going to flirt with the enemy?! You aren’t even really supporting me!”

“I am doing my best, okay, TK. Don’t make me go down there and beat you myself.” You waggled a finger and leant on the window sill. “Commence the yearly butt-kicking for goodness!”

Hanzo chuckled and calmly exhaled. Takeshi looked like he wanted to walk away, but he shook off his hesitation and raised his fist. Alright then. The archer did the same and gestured for the guard to attack whenever he was ready. The ‘fight’ the ensued was really only a simple sparring session. Hanzo did land some punches and kicks, but they weren’t really thrown to hurt. In your true supportive style, you cheered everytime Takeshi landed a hit. It wasn’t often, but it was clear he was doing a lot better than when he first started.

Eventually, Takeshi was thrown to the ground and he raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay, that’s enough—ow—I’m defeated.”

Hanzo backed off immediately and you quickly ran down the stairs to help Takeshi up. “Aww man, I should have recorded it—you’ve definitely improved, buddy!” You gave your friend the thumbs up with your other arm around his shoulder.

There was a purple bruise forming on Takeshi cheek and he winced as he tried to smile. “Really?” He looked between you and Hanzo for confirmation.

“It is true. You did very well. I actually had to defend myself this year.” Hanzo offered a polite smile. “You have much potential, Takeshi. You fellow clan members are foolish not to recognise your tenacity.” He looked around and frowned at the lack of anyone else in the courtyard. “...It seems that they have become complacent in protecting this place.”

“To be fair, its only during this one night security eases off. We know you’re coming and a majority of members don’t want to get their butts handed to them.” Takeshi eyed you and chuckled at your beaming smile. “I guess I’m the only glutton for punishment among us.”

“You should not see it that way, my friend.” Hanzo pet the guard on the shoulder and headed towards the dojo. “Would you both like to come along? This will be my last year upholding this tradition.” The invitation surprised both you and Takeshi, although there was a warmth and sincerity in Hanzo’s gaze that made it clear his offer was genuine. “I brought sake with me. Come have a drink. We should—celebrate, in a way.”

You hummed, taking in Hanzo’s new, more modern appearance and smiled. “You’ve changed, you know? Takeshi’s not the only one who’s improved, I think.” You clapped your hands excitedly. “I like it! I can feel that great things are going to come your way, Hanzo.”

“I appreciate it, dear one. Now come along, the both of you.”

You kept your arm around Takeshi as he hobbled along and the both of you trailed behind the Shimada.

“...Can we get some ramen after? I’m starving after getting kicked around.” Takeshi sounded exhausted.

You were always down for late night ramen! “Sure—Hanzo, wanna come along?”

“I suppose I have the time—if you would have me.”

“Ohh Hanzo, I would have you any way I could—”

Takeshi made a disgusted sound. “Stop flirting while I’m here, it’s gross!”

“I can’t help it~” You sang before laughing.

Hanzo smiled at the banter. If good things were headed his way, he felt like he could count you as one of them.

✤✤✤✤✤✤

♥   masterlist   ♥   If you like my work, please consider buying me a coffee :)

[racingtoaredlight]

What’s Been Lost

The guitar at the top is a 1968 Gibson Johnny Smith model.  The picture below is a collection of all the parts I assembled my Precision Bass from.  These are two of my all-time favorite models of any instrument, in any period of history, but they represent two sides of a progression that we can’t reverse.

When Leo Fender released the Fender Broadcaster in 1950, it changed the world of instrument manufacturing forever.  If you think that this doesn’t impact the actual music...you need to adjust that view immediately.  The Fender Precision Bass alone almost completely eradicated the upright bass’ presence in popular music.

The Johnny Smith model from 1968 is a stunning example of human craftsmanship on a variety of levels.  My P-Bass is designed after a 1957 Precision Bass...an instrument 11 years older than the Gibson.  However...to this day, after numerous corporate changings of hands...you can still see how Fender is looking forward while Gibson is looking to the past.

This is not an argument about what’s better or worse, rather a discussion about what was lost in this progress forward.

***

I talk about music history a lot because context is important.

Johnny Smith was an old-school jazz guy.  He grew up in the jazz age...an age that didn’t have sophisticated amplification and PA systems and solid-bodied guitars.  The acoustic properties of a guitar were as paramount as the amplified ones.

You teach acoustically.  You practice acoustically.  You play in big bands and trios acoustically.  And these old “archtops” were designed specifically for this purpose.  They were big bodied and thunderous sounding.  A Gibson L-5 or Super 400 was designed to be heard through a big band’s mix acoustically, because amplification wasn’t a given.  And Gibson had been making guitars like this since the late 1800′s.

In contrast, Leo Fender started his company solely with electric guitars in mind.  It’s important to understand this dynamic, because it had long-reaching effects that not only impacted Gibson, but the music world as a whole.  And while a lot of this was for the better, there were casualties along the way.

***

It’s hard to think of this as new school and old school, but it’s a HUGE change.

The top image is a modern version of the classic Johnny Smith floating pickup.  You can see that the pickup is reflecting off the top, and that it’s not attached to the guitar itself anywhere.  The pickup is mounted on the pickguard, and no screws were put into the guitar’s top itself, to preserve all the acoustic qualities.

Wes Montgomery was a new school guitarist when he hit the scene, as weird as it is to think of a 60′s jazz guitarist in those terms.  You can see that his guitar has a hole drilled into the top, with the pickup screwed into a mounting bracket.  This helped tremendously in keeping the big, hollow guitar from feeding back...and was much more suited for amplified playing.  Floating pickups from this era were essentially afterthoughts...”hey you need to plug into something, and this doesn’t fuck with the top.”

I’ve played both floating and fixed pickup archtops.  An archtop with a fixed pickup is not a great acoustic experience.  Sure, it amplifies an acoustic sound, but it’s neither loud nor particularly pleasing.  Plugged in is a different story, but there wasn’t much of a window this style of guitar proved to be practical in, even if it was an improvement over a floater.

But this was Gibson, the company, saying “we see the movement music is making, and we need to adjust.”

They might have been kings of the arcthop, jazz era...but Fender essentially said they’re not even going to challenge in this area, instead focus on the future.  To their credit, Gibson made moves in this regard with the solidbodied Les Paul...but there was still tremendous demand for the old school archtops, as the music industry still had a spot for guitarists like this.

***

Gibson themselves kind of killed their archtop legacy in 1958, when they released the iconic ES-335.  They had a number of other smaller, thinner bodied archtops, but the 335′s centerblock underneath changed the game.

You could still get an airy jazz sound out of it, but now you also had access to all the overdriven rock sounds that were blossoming during this time.  And the 335 still retained a lot of the hallmarks of Gibson’s craftsmanship you see in their archtops, but at a much more approachable price.

Same with the Les Paul.  If you didn’t want a “jazz guitar” then this is where you went.  And while there are degrees of craftsmanship involved in the 335 and Les Paul, it’s nothing anywhere near the level of expertise you see in Gibson’s archtops.

This is to say nothing of Fender-style guitars, which don’t require any craftsmanship at all.  It’s hard to compare hand-curved sides of beautifully aged flamed maple, ebony overlays, mother-of-pearl inlays, gilded hardware, pristince spruce tops...to instruments you can put together with a screwdriver.

Wood doesn’t matter with a Fender.  It’s almost a subtractive influence on the tone, rather than an essential ingredient.  It’s incredibly unfair to say this, also not true whatsoever...but there’s really nothing special about a Fender.  Even in the lauded pre-CBS era, it wasn’t made by a single person, it was made on a conveyer belt, and it’s just a machine or tool rather than an instrument.

Again, that’s not fair...but in comparison to a vintage Gibson?  It’s 100% accurate.

***

If you’ve never played guitar...any instrument really...and you’ve never experienced playing a Fender-style against an expertly crafted archtop, it’s hard to understand this dynamic.  Even talking primo vintage or boutique versions, the experience just isn’t the same.

To the audience, this might not matter, but to musicians it’s HUGE.  The personal experience of actually playing an instrument like these archtops is special.  Not “baby gloves” special, but special in the sense that this instrument is not something you can just go and play at Guitar Center.

Few weeks ago, I talked about vintage electric guitars...and while playing a 1959 Strat, both me and the guy who was selling it agreed we wouldn’t trade it for our modern-Strat variants.  But acoustic instruments are different beasts, and age differently.  A solid Fender or Les Paul isn’t going to change much as its wood ages...but an acoustic guitar absolutely does.

Spruce is a very resinous wood, and as the thin top ages, that resin starts to evaporate, radically changing the acoustic qualities of the guitar.  A certain “crispiness” and “airiness” comes out in a very pleasing way.

Electric guitars create a pleasing sound for a bigger audience.  But acoustic guitars are more personal.  More intimate.  They have a character all to themselves.  As music becomes more electric and less intimate, this is lost.  We could talk about electric acoustic guitars, but that’s a discussion for another day*.

*Spoiler Alert...I think acoustic guitars with pickups sound like utter shit, and it’s a stupid ass thing to do in the first place.  Play a fucking Strat or an old Gretsch or *GASP* an old Gibson archtop.

***

So, to answer the question, what have we lost?

We’ve lost craftsmanship.  That’s not to say the progress made hasn’t been worth it...if I haven’t made this clear yet lets get it settled, there is zero practical advantage in playing an old-school archtop today, and a whole lot of pains in the ass.

But there’s a distinct lack of charm in today’s instruments, even high-end custom shop models and from boutique makers.  Guitars supposedly one of a kind seem completely mass produced.  For example, I found over 400 used examples of Gibson Custom Shop’s flagship Les Paul that ranges from $6,500-$8,500.  Check out their “Murphy Lab” of supposed one-offs and try not to gasp at the prices.

But, to my point, how could you possibly feel there’s anything special or unqiue about any of this, buying one of them new?

All of these modern guitars are significantly easier to make than those old archtops, and there’s a substantial premium built into the price due to the artificial aging.  I’m sorry, but that’s not craftsmanship as I like to think about it.  Again, this has nothing to do with the practicality of the instruments, just emotive content.

Below, I’m going to highlight a bunch of features you find on these beautiful old archtops.  You don’t find this on guitars made by anyone anymore.  Gibson will do an L-5 or something as a special one off, but these guitars are artifacts of a time long gone.

***

Wood Quality - Here’s the sad truth...Fender, Gibson and Martin completely eviscerated the old-growth forests that had the highest quality woods in the ‘50′s and ‘60′s.  You just don’t get this type of incredible wood anymore, even when paying a premium.  The spruce top on the Super 400 above is violin quality.

***

Inlay - Look at that motherfucking inlay!!!!!!!!!!!!!  If you’re dropping $8k plus on a guitar, would you rather have workmanship like that?  Or like this?

***

Flamed Maple Necks w/ a “Stinger” - The stinger is an ebony overlay on the back of the headstock, something aesthetic only that’s like a treat for the person playing it.  You can see in the top two L-5 and Super 400 pictures that the stinger travels down the middle of the neck, while on the bottom Johnny Smith that has a 3-piece neck, it adorns the top and bottom.

The wood the neck is made of likely has little impact on the guitar’s overall sound, but it’s beautiful.

When I started to show promise on guitar, I started classical and jazz lessons with this hardcore motherfucker drill sergeant who had one of the most beautiful guitars I’ve ever seen (made by Brad Nickerson), the flamed maple neck especially.  Every time I was fortunate enough for him to let me play it, the sensation of wrapping my hand around that neck and seeing the beautiful flamed maple is something I’ve been chasing for decades, and still haven’t found.

The idea that it’s a “treat for the player” totally resonates with me.  The audience doesn’t care, nobody else is going to touch this guitar, it’s expensive as hell for no other reason than looks...but it’s a treat for the player that makes the instrument more special.  I do bond with my guitars, and while I love playing all different kinds, ownership is different.

I’ll have my flamed maple neck someday.

***

“The Scroll”/Point - This probably makes the most sense as to why Gibson stopped doing this, no matter how cool it looked.  As guitar became more amplified, and more virtuosos emerged utilizing the upper registers of the guitar, this ornate little detail took up precious real estate where you could add more frets.  For old-school jazz guys, only having 20-frets wasn’t a big deal at all.  Different story in the modern era.

***

Ornate Hardware - You can see a variety of different, unique tailpieces above.  The top two are L-5 tailpieces...which were pretty consistent throughout, occasionally putting an artist’s name on the middle section and subtly changing up the engraving.  The Super 400 was consistent all the way through, in terms of the design...but would feature unique engravings over the various eras.

Below is the tailpiece you get on a brand new $8,500 guitar today.  More practical?  Absolutely.  But it doesn’t have the same charm as the gilded stuff.

***

Cool Little Touches - Yea I know it seems weird complaining about a guitar company in the modern era not engaging in cost-prohibitive things like making guitars seem personalized and unique.  But back in the heyday of these guitars, they were personalized and unique.  Typically made by the same small handful of skilled craftsman...not in huge teams with CNC machines.

Those cool little features...the mother-of-pearl heart inlay on the Wes Montgomery L-5, and the hand engraved “Super 400�� on the butt of the guitar’s neck...it’s hard to say guitars made by people willing to obsess over details like that are replaceable or mass produced.  As much care and art went into making the instruments themselves, as it did from the musicians using it to create.

The 7-ply binding on the bodies and 5-ply binding on the neck and headstock looked absolutely gorgeous.  It serves zero purpose, but just looks really fuckin’ cool.

***

Listen, I get why we don’t see shit like this on guitars anymore...even guitars made by Gibson.  But still, these are artifacts of a niche of history that is already gone.  The progress of the future leaving you behind doesn’t mean that something necessarily bad or unwanted, it might just not fit.

But there’s something sad in things like this being lost to the march of time.  You see little details like these, and you know that an expert human being was responsible for creating this...not some machine or some underpaid laborer.  It takes years to develop the skills necessary to make things like you see in the images above.

And while that doesn’t diminish the quality of the craftsmanship and sound of modern guitars, there’s something missing that you get with guitars in this style.

Whether it’s the macro guitar world moving towards solid bodied guitars that require less craftsmanship...or the macro guitar world moving towards amplified styles of music and away from its acoustic roots...what’s been lost is an appreciation for a guitarist’s personal connection with their instrument.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

I'VE BEEN PONDERING DANGER

For example, I doubt it would be closer to the truth to treat stuff as worthless. To most hackers, getting investors seems like a lot because it's compressed into a short period. Most people in America do.1 They are a perennial topic of heated discussion on Slashdot. The founders all learned to do every job in the company. Could civil liberties really be a cause, rather than the other way around.2 One of the worst things that can happen to a startup—so important that morale alone is almost enough to determine success. Because they're at the bottom of the file; don't feel obliged to cover any of them; write for a reader who won't read the essay, but really the thesis is an optimistic one—that hackers can implement software, but not as measured in press releases, but not random: I found my doodles changed after I started studying painting.3 One of the founders might decide to split off and start another company, so I figured it had to be prepared to explain how to make them look impressive, and b avoid the danger of fooling yourself as well as writing software, I had to add a new application to my list of known time sinks: Firefox. But two guys who thought Multics excessively complex went off and wrote their own. That's nonsense. Nothing owns you like fragile stuff.

It seems to me the business guys who did the most for Google were the ones who were smart enough to find you by themselves.4 So far all the suggestions for fixing the problem seem to involve new protocols.5 Being friends with someone for even a couple days will tell you that they don't meet so many people who've done it.6 Wall Street didn't buy. Their stock price has been flat for years.7 Three days later, having spent twenty hours staring at it, you should think far more about who you can recruit as a cofounder than the state of the economy doesn't matter much either way.8 Mass-market digital cameras are doing it to the car makers that preceded him. What they all have in common is that a lot of them. I started to make the most money the soonest with the least impedance.

You don't simply get to do whatever you want; the board still has to act in the interest of the shareholders; but if you have kids.9 A few grammatical tweaks, and a good speaker.10 Wealth is what people want, read Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People.11 One reason it was hard to convince galleries even to do that.12 If you work your way down the Forbes 400 making an x next to the name of each person with an MBA, you'll learn something important about business school.13 I know delivering a prewritten talk makes it harder to engage with an audience. And the Japanese don't like immigration.14 You set up a still life to make a winning product. And once you apply that kind of work often develop a protective incompetence at it. Why should we care especially about civil liberties?15 Civil War were. But that is at least a couple days considering different ideas, instead of where it should be helpful to anyone who wants to distract voters from bad times at home, you can solve that problem by stopping entirely.

An emergency could push other thoughts out of your space, and perhaps even move to the sort of problems hackers are used to solving, giving customers what they want will also tend to be less insistent. They can take months to find a place where there are a few cases where this isn't true: the urls at the bottom of the hierarchy. Viaweb. If success probably means getting bought, why not think of that as your task? The place to look is in our blind spot: in our natural, naive belief that it's all about us. Something that used to be valuable, and now that we were savages and our world was stupid. When I look back at photos from the 1970s.16

Your old bad habits now help you to work. If you feel you're really helping people, you'll keep working even when it seems like your startup is cheap to run a startup are commonsense things people knew before there were business schools, or even universities. Conversely, if you try. Startup ideas are ideas for companies, and potential employees. There was another speaker who was much better than me. When I was in the middle of the twentieth century. They'll pay attention next time. We may be able to brag about the good terms they got. Like most startups, we changed our plan on the fly.17

That could be a problem in fussier countries. Its more general version is our answer to the Greeks: Don't see purpose where there isn't. Most hackers who start startups wish they could do searches online. Mihalko, made that year something his students still talk about, thirty years later. They seemed a little surprised at having total freedom. They would be in the best position to conquer the rest of your life.18 The trouble is, they're not drifting. But are these just outliers? Success for a startup. It's a lot more interested.19 Two or three course projects?20 If life seems awful to kids, it's neither because hormones are turning you all into monsters as your parents believe, nor because life actually is awful as you believe.

Notes

Rice and Beans for 2n olive oil or mining equipment, such a low valuation to see artifacts from it, whether you have to be a big company, but the meretriciousness of the world in which case immediate problem solved, or editions with the definition of property is driven by bookmarking, not eating virtuously.

Convertible debt can be compared, per capita income. One of the technically dynamic, massively capitalized and highly organized corporations on the ability to solve the problem is not a problem that they take away with dropping Java in the biggest winners, from hour to hour that the people working for large companies, executives at large companies will one day is the other students, he was made particularly clear in our case, companies' market caps will end up saying no to science as well as down. A has an operator for removing spaces from strings and language B doesn't, that it even seemed a bad idea.

This is what you do it now. A good programming language ought to be able to formalize a small business that isn't the last they ever need. The founders who go on to the modern idea were proposed by Timothy Hart in 1964, two years investigating it.

The threshold for participating goes down to you. Adults care just as you can help in that category. The solution is to try to go sell the bad groups and they have that glazed over look.

There is of course, that I didn't need to raise the next round is high, so I have a standard piece of casuistry for this situation: that startups usually lose money at first you make something popular but apparently unimportant, like speculators, that I hadn't had much success in doing something different if it was considered the most visible index of that generation had been raised religious and then using growth rate early on when you have two choices and one or two, I'd say the raison d'etre of prep schools improve kids' admissions prospects. Here's an example of applied empathy.

There will be, and that there's more of a startup you have to want to invest in a certain threshold.

I wonder if they'd been pretty clever by getting such a large pizza and found an open booth. Indiana University Publications.

Price Bubble? It's hard to predict at the last step in this article used the term whitelist instead of happy. Hint: the company by doing another round that values the company goes public.

It derives from efforts by businesses to use an OS that doesn't have dangerous local maxima, the fatigue hits you like shit. There is archaeological evidence for large companies will one day have an email address you can skip the first half of it in action, there is money.

Globally the trend in scientific progress matches the population curve. Correction: Earlier versions used a technicality to get good grades. The empirical evidence suggests that if there were, we found they used it to steal the company they're buying.

But his world record only lasted 46 days. I recommend you solve this problem, any claim to the biggest sources of pain for founders, if the students did well they do, just that it was. 4%? We didn't know ourselves which VC firms regularly cold email.

These anti-dilution provisions, even in their hearts that if you ban other ways to do is assemble components designed and manufactured by someone who doesn't understand what you're doing something that flows from some types of startup: Watch people who interrupt you. 25. As Clinton himself discovered to his surprise when, in Galbraith's words, it's easy to get users to succeed in a startup at a friend's house for the linguist and presumably teacher Daphnis, but you should seek outside advice, before realizing that that's what they give it additional funding at a regularly increasing rate to impress investors. I'd encourage anyone starting a startup in question usually is doing badly and is doomed anyway.

Peter, Why Are We Getting a Divorce? Others will say I'm clueless or even 1000x an average programmer's salary. But the usual suspects in about the nature of the Garter and given the Earldom of Rutland.

Most of the 1929 crash. I think is happening when you say something to bad groups is that the http requests are indistinguishable from those of popular Web browsers, including the order and referrer. Someone who's not a problem so far done a pretty comprehensive view of investor who for some reason, rather than making the broadest type of mail, I asked some founders who had recently arrived from Russia.

But the question of whether public company not to pay the most successful startups of all, economic inequality as a result, comparisons of programming languages either take the hit.

All you have no way to find may be the least VC-like.

Vision research may be enough, the top startup law firms are Wilson Sonsini, Orrick, Fenwick West, Gunderson Dettmer, and cook on lowish heat for at least 3 or 4 YC alumni who I believe, and degenerate from 129. I don't know how to deal with the best case. Indiana University Publications.

In some cases e.

For example, it's not as facile a trick as it needs to learn to acknowledge, but nothing else: no friends, TV, go running.

But when you ask parents why kids shouldn't swear, the way to fight back themselves. We didn't let him off, either, that it killed the best startups, who've already made it to the company's PR people worked hard to get frozen yogurt. But not all, economic inequality. This is actually from the compromise you'd have reached after lots of people.

[flauntpage]

Sifting Through Bad Takes to Explain Why U.S. Soccer Failed

There’s a lot to parse after Tuesday night’s embarrassment but I’ll start with this: That team was not prepared to play and looked like it didn’t even give a shit.

I’ve never seen a more appalling display of effort in 27 years of watching United States soccer, and that was a constant theme throughout this debacle of a qualifying cycle.

That’s on head coach Bruce Arena, who was equally casual in his post game press conference, claiming that no drastic changes needed to be made after a country of 300,000,000 people was just eliminated from the World Cup by an island nation of 1.3 million.

He should be canned for that offensive nonchalance alone.

The next thing to do is fire U.S. Soccer President Sunil Gulati and move on from the aging veterans who no longer have a future on the national team. It’s a sad way to see the likes of Clint Dempsey and Tim Howard to go out, but the silver lining is that this pathetic charade is over and we can now focus on fixing the problems.

Let’s do this:

I’m gonna cobble together all of the 24-hour hot takes that I read from soccer experts and national idiots alike, and we’ll just go down the list determining whether each one contains any sort of validity.

  1. MLS is to blame for the decline of the USMNT

Yes and no.

The first thing to understand is that MLS growth has improved our regional opponents.

Honduras, Panama, and Trinidad & Tobago all have a significant number of guys playing club soccer in the United States. Two goals in the Panama/Costa Rica game were scored by MLS players, and the third goal was scored by a former MLS player. Honduras got two goals from Houston Dynamo attackers and one of the guys who scored for fucking Mexico will play for an MLS expansion team next season.

On the flip side, six of the 11 U.S. starters are current MLS players. Three of those guys, Michael Bradley, Tim Howard and Paul Arriola, played in foreign leagues before returning to the United States. You can say that Bradley and Howard got worse when they came home, but they also got older. Tim Howard played more than 10 years in England, so don’t tell me he sucked last night because he now plays in MLS.

Eight of 11 U.S. starters last night had some sort of experience playing outside of America, so I don’t buy the “blame MLS” excuse.

If anything, we’re in a weird catch 22/transitional period.

If our best players go to Europe, MLS doesn’t improve

If our best players stay in MLS, they aren’t competing against the world’s best

Translation: What’s best for MLS isn’t necessarily best for U.S. Soccer, and vice versa.

We’re right in the middle of that right now, where we want MLS to take the next step but we also want our best young talent to thrive in the world’s best leagues (Christian Pulisic). It’s gonna be a bit rocky until we find a balance there.

  2. This failure will affect the popularity of soccer

No.

Last night’s travesty is an indictment on U.S. Soccer, not the popularity of the sport in this country.

See, most of the people who watch the World Cup every four years go back to watching football, basketball, baseball, and hockey after the tournament is over.

The main reason they watch is because:

there’s an element of nationalism involved (rah rah go USA!)

there’s nothing else to watch in July

Some casuals might become interested enough to consume more soccer after the WC, but the sport continues to grow in non-World Cup years because of the strength of now-available foreign broadcasts and the growth of MLS.

Atlanta United, an expansion team, set a single-game attendance record this year when they shoved 70,000 people into their stadium (they share it with the Falcons). Your hometown Philadelphia Union were really bad (again), but continued to draw 12,000 to 15,000 fans to CHESTER every weekend.

The popularity of the English Premier League and Champions League has skyrocketed on the strength of NBC and FOX broadcasts. You’ll find a lot of people who watch EPL with their kids on Saturday morning, then flip on college football or Phillies baseball later in the day.

If anything, U.S. soccer is on a trajectory that is incongruous with the overall growth of the sport here. We have millions of people in this country who love soccer, but couldn’t give a shit about the USMNT or MLS, which is an ongoing struggle.

Plus, the World Cup isn’t even the “Super Bowl” of soccer. The apex of competitive global soccer is the annual Champion’s League final.

  3. This generation of players just isn’t that good

Correct.

We failed to qualify for two Olympic games and a couple of other tournaments as well, which had a cascade effect on the performance in other competitions.

There are some success stories, I think. Jorge Villafana might be the left back of the future. DeAndre Yedlin is still young and getting Premier League playing time. I’d cut ties with most of the rest of the team and start handing out caps to guys like Josh Sargent (Werder Bremen), Weston McKennie (Schalke), and Tyler Adams (NY Red Bulls).

Next friendly. Just do it, man. Clear it out. Have fun. Be weird. http://pic.twitter.com/DaY63JxcK2

— Will Parchman (@WillParchman) October 11, 2017

Let’s get the kids out there and get ahead of the curve right now. I don’t need to see more of Chris Wondolowski, Darlington Nagbe, Michael Bradley, Matt Besler, Graham Zusi, and blah blah blah etc.

  4. Independent youth clubs are ruining our development

Correct.

We’re the only country in the world where soccer is a sport for suburban white kids with money.

You pay your club team, something with a stupid name like “Doylestown United Rage 1997,” a bunch of cash just so you can schlep your kids to Tuckahoe Turf Farm every other weekend for day-long tournaments in 95 degree heat.

Meantime, the urban minority soccer loving kids are just sort of falling through the cracks.

True story: the Philadelphia Union’s first academy success was an African immigrant who came to America at age 14. He joined a local club that scrimmaged a Union youth team, and that’s how he was identified and brought into the academy setup.

So it’s important to get into urban communities and identify where these kids are playing.

I used to referee at a place called “Sofive” in Elkins Park, where 95% of the players were “foreigners.” I reffed Brazilians, Mexicans, Uzbeks, Jamaicans, and Africans (not African-Americans, Africans who just got here). I guarantee that no one is scouting those kids or even paying attention. The next U.S. Soccer star is probably playing there, not at Boyertown Junior High School East.

Now, some clubs obviously want to hang on to their best players, and they aren’t crazy about becoming a “feeder” for the local MLS team, but that’s the model we’re heading towards. Individual MLS teams have their own academies. There used to be one national academy in Florida, and that’s where guys like Landon Donovan came from. In 2017, each MLS team is trying to produce its own regional domestic talent.

That relationship between longstanding clubs and these nascent MLS academies needs to be streamlined. A lot of youth soccer forces are working against each other, which is why we aren’t developing these kids from start to finish.

Here’s a valid take from an English guy who now covers MLS:

Thing about soccer in the US compared to other countries I've worked in is that game run almost like a private members club.

— Simon Evans (@sgevans) October 11, 2017

Ding ding ding! We have a winner!

But wait, here’s another take from a different ex-pat Englishman who now does play-by-play for the Colorado Rapids:

When youth soccer clubs offer 'financial aid' for parents to be able to pay for their kids to play, then that should be a concern.

— Richard Fleming (@FlemingSport) October 11, 2017

Holy shit these guys are on fire!

Maybe the Brits do know the sport better than we do…

Anyway, it also doesn’t help that some parents see sports as a gateway to a free college ride, but that’s an intrinsically American problem. Foreign kids are identified at ages five and six and stay in the same academy for their entire youth.

Here, we send kids to college from ages 18 to 22, then they don’t play pro ball until age 23 (Keegan Rosenberry). Imagine if Lionel Messi didn’t turn pro until age 23. We need our kids on MLS fields at ages 17, 18, and 19, and not wasting prime years playing meaningless ball in Chapel Hill or College Park.

And more money needs to be allocated to U.S. subsidized youth development, which needs to be restructured.

Of that $26M, $9M went to Development Academy. ~$11M went to youth team ops. $2.75M to technical advisers.

Just $2M to scouting. http://pic.twitter.com/zSz9B039WV

— Dan Dickinson (@GothamistDan) October 11, 2017

  5. “If our best athletes played soccer”

Of course it would be amazing if Odell Beckham, Jr. had stuck with soccer, and he was paired up top with Lebron James in a 4-4-2.

But we’re one of the biggest countries on the planet Earth. We have enough talent here to be the best at every sport. This line of thinking is valid, but it’s not the reason for our failures. Iceland just qualified for the World Cup and their entire country has fewer people than Bucks County.

  6. Our coaches aren’t good enough

This is true at every level. Same with refs.

I’ve been around some youth coaches who yell at 12-year-old children with non-instructions:

run harder!

get the ball!

kick it!

And the parents are just as bad, because they don’t understand the rules of the game and yell equally absurd things at their own children.

It happens at the top, too. The Union hired a very young Jim Curtin who has had to learn on the job during three full losing seasons. He was also given zero resources to work with, which is another story entirely.

We definitely need to emphasize coaching education and raise the standards here.

  7. A lack of promotion and relegation hurts domestic competition

No, it doesn’t.

The standard of MLS play continues to grow without pro/rel. There are problem owners, like our very own Jay Sugarman, who hurt individual clubs, but there are organic ways to remove those obstacles without installing a crippling pro/rel system.

We’re just not ready for it yet, nor do we need it to be successful. U.S. Soccer didn’t fail because fourth-division Stockade FC was disenfranchised.

  8. We deserve this because we voted for Donald Trump

Meh.

It’s true that some Mexican players said they were extra motivated to beat the United States because of comments our president made about their country.

But here’s the thing; if you need extra motivation to play against your arch rival in World Cup qualifying, then you’re not worthy of wearing an El Tri shirt in the first place.

    We didn’t qualify for the World Cup because we’re in a weird transitional phase affecting both U.S. Soccer and MLS. A generational gap is partly due to a broken development system that needs to be reworked. We have three-hundred million people in this country and should not be losing to tiny island nations like Trinidad and Tobago. But we also have to admit that our regional opponents are improving.

That’s about it. It’s not the end of the world. It’s actually a good wake up call, because sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before realizing how bad it is. We’ll figure it out.

If you didn’t read any of the article, but want a summary instead, click on this:

Here's the full Taylor Twellman rant: http://pic.twitter.com/3YOAQrTKmY

— Max Wildstein (@MaxWildstein) October 11, 2017

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