#There are three very different sets of dates on here but i am pretty sure its for october first?

[crushpunky]

drew and actress!reader read thirst tweets

masterlist | actress!reader masterlist

warning: a little bit thirsty, as expected <3

The cast settled into their seats as the crew finished setting up the cameras and lighting.

“Why am I more nervous for this than any of the other interviews?” Madelyn laughed, straightening up her dress. The cast had already done a handful of different interviews for the third season of Outer Banks, the famous (or infamous) “Thirst Tweets” the last on the docket.

“No I am too, babes.” Y/n said, shaking Madelyn’s leg playfully. The three girls, Madelyn, Madison, and y/n, sat in front chatting while the boys, JD and Drew, were getting their hair “refreshed” before they began shooting.

“Alright, so here are your tweets,” one of the crew members said, handing each of them a phone preloaded with tweets of varying degrees of horniness.

“Oh my—” JD started to shout, but was cut off when Madison elbowed him.

“Don’t start yet!” Madison giggled, resting her phone in her lap, a blush already rising in her cheeks.

“Ok, you guys good?” The cameraman asked, shooting the cast a thumbs up.

“Yes!” The five of them shouted in unison as the camera began to roll.

“Alrighty, take it away… Madelyn.” The secondary camera operator focused on Madelyn, who looked down at her phone.

“Ok, this one is pretty straightforward: ‘Madelyn Cline is a mother’.” Madelyn giggled.

“Not just ‘a mother’, ‘mother’.” Madison corrected, causing Madelyn to shake her head bashfully.

“Ok, ok, Mads you go.” Y/n said, elbowing Madison lightly.

“‘Madison Bailey please kiss me’...” Madison looked into the camera, a cheeky grin on her face. “Ha, ha… no.”

The cast laughed before returning to their phones, looking through their tweets.

“‘Jonathan Davis I am free tomorrow at 5 pm if you want to go on a date and hold hands! And… redacted, redacted, redacted’.” Jonathan read.

“Sounds… fun?” Y/n commented, glancing back at JD, an eyebrow raised.

“Oh, ‘it’s true. Drew Starkey makes me go feral’.” Drew read sheepishly, his cheeks flushing. JD started to make some sort of animal noise, Drew joining in, the two of them playfully going “feral” behind the girls.

“Y/n, does Drew Starkey make you go feral?” Madelyn asked teasingly.

“Not in whatever way they were doing.” Y/n stifled a laugh, turning back to Drew, who shook his head with a grin.

“Ok, sure. You go, baby.” Drew said, rolling his eyes playfully.

“Alright…” Y/n scrolled, looking for a good tweet before continuing, “‘y/n is so fine, like please ruin my life I beg of you’. Wow, thanks I guess? For letting me ruin your life?”

The cast laughed before continuing back to their tweets, each of them feeling flushed and flattered by the very kind tweets.

“‘Before I watched Outer Banks I always classified the rich as annoying and vowed I’d never simp over one…’” Drew read, “‘until I met Rafe Cameron and flew up his ass like a bat’?”

“‘Flew up his ass like a bat’?” Y/n asked incredulously, her mouth agape.

“If somebody walked up to you on the street and said that to you…?” Madelyn asked Drew.

“Marry me.” Drew said nonchalantly.

“Drew, I need to ask you a question—” Y/n began, but collapsed into a fit of laughter before she could get the words out.

“Can I ‘fly up your ass like a bat’?” JD finished, making eye contact with Drew before the two of them moved in for a dramatic kiss, falling away just before their lips would’ve met. The girls let out surprised screams, grabbing onto each other before laughing.

“‘I love my boyfriend with all my heart, I truly do, but Madelyn Cline can sit on my face she’s so beautiful’.” Madelyn read, a small smirk on her face.

“Wow, that’s a lot… real.” Y/n said. Drew’s head whipped up, a look of confusion on his face.

“Is there something you need to tell us?” JD quipped, causing y/n to realize exactly what she said.

“No, no, no,” Y/n chuckled. “Madelyn Cline is very beautiful, but I am still very much feral for Drew Starkey.”

“You’ve got a thing for Camerons?” Madison asked, Madelyn and Drew leaning in with mischievous smiles on their faces.

“Yep, yep, that’s it.” Y/n laughed, nodding into the camera.

“‘Y/n is so beautiful, Drew Starkey can you fight?’” Y/n read with a chuckle, turning to look at Drew.

“Yes, yes I can.” Drew said into the camera, his face completely serious.

“Drew wouldn’t hurt a fly.” Madelyn clarified.

“Oh no, no, I will. Trust.” Drew raised his eyebrows, wrapping an arm around y/n’s shoulders before pressing a kiss to the top of her head. The cast let out a collective “awww”, y/n giggling bashfully.

“‘Drew Starkey could rail me anyday. Respectfully’.” Drew chuckled nervously. Madelyn and Madison looked between each other, their jaws dropped.

“Once again, I’m flattered. But… that’s reserved for this one—” Drew grabbed y/n’s shoulder, shaking her playfully. Y/n immediately put her hands over her face, hoping to cover the flustered expression on her face.

“Oh my god.” Y/n mumbled into her hands, the other cast members bursting out into fits of laughter at Drew’s boldness.

“Alright, and cut!” The cameraman said, the cast letting out cheers as they got up from their seats. As they stood, y/n felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist before turning back to Drew.

“How you feeling, baby?” Drew hummed, grinning down at y/n cheekily.

“Flattered. Very.” Y/n giggled, pressing a kiss to Drew’s jaw.

“Well, a lot of those tweets certainly had some… good ideas.” Drew whispered.

“Starkey! You’re… too much.” Y/n felt her cheeks warm as Drew kissed her languidly.

“Am I wrong though, baby?” He teased.

“Let’s see when we get to the hotel.” Y/n said, stepping away from Drew and grabbing his hand as they made their way out of the studio… but she had a feeling they probably weren’t going to make it to the hotel.

[ktownshizzle]

Love & Lullabies | Part 4.5

✎ ˎˊ˗ Pairing: Min Yoongi x female Reader

✎ ˎˊ˗ Summary: What begins as a simple favor for your best friend Namjoon soon pulls you into the rhythms of Yoongi’s life—afternoons spent caring for his son, late nights filled with candid conversations, and a connection neither of you thought you needed. You’re just fresh out of a long-term relationship with an ex who didn’t want a family with you, so did you really just stumble into a life you’ve always dreamed of? (Thank god Namjoon isn’t the only one who’s clumsy.)

✎ ˎˊ˗ Alternatively: It’s 2025 and BTS is prepping for their comeback. All members seem to have gained muscle weight from their time at camp. But Min Yoongi has gained a different kind of weight—an 8-pound baby and a fuck-load of responsibility. (Thank god you’re there to help him.)

✎ ˎˊ˗ Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, idol!au, Acquaintances to Lovers, Reader is Namjoon’s bestie

✎ ˎˊ˗ Warnings: Yoongi is a DILF (!!!) That’s it.

✎ ˎˊ˗ Chapter warnings: porn with some plot kinda, this yoongi is very horny and is a very methodical masturbator (?) in the way he set the mood for himself (could be canon, amirite), let’s fix that boner you left him with, and let’s soothe your weary minds from that Dispatch article, POV switch after the article headline, idk if you know that one video of yoongi in d-day during the piano break in life goes on he does this thing with his tongue… it’s written in here somewhere

✎ ˎˊ˗ Word count: 1.5k

✎ ˎˊ˗ Posting date: December 15, 2024

✎ ˎˊ˗ A/N: Surprise! I kid you not, this was written within a span of like 8 hours? So if it sucks, that’s probably why, lol. Lucky for y’all I am too impatient to wait for notes milestones before I upload the next part, so here you go. 🎁 Also, @glossdebut, you know what you did. Enjoy, my lovelies~ 💕

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four |  Masterlist

“Fuck me…” Yoongi sighs, leaning further back into the computer chair. He runs both hands through his hair as the preliminary pinpricks of pleasure makes his cock spring to life under his sweatpants.

His phone is now propped on his half-empty coffee mug, of which the screen—maxed out in its brightness settings—is projecting the photo you sent through its 2x dynamic galaxy amoled display—of which his dick would personally like to thank his Samsung sponsors.

He is so horny he might just die if he doesn’t get off in the next five minutes. 

It’s your fault. Of course, it is.

God you’re so fucking sexy, do you even know that? Do you even realize what you do to him? He is literally about to masturbate in his multi-million won worth studio to the pitiful pixels you have afforded him with.

He stands up, curses you under his breath as he pulls his pants down to pool around his ankles. He drops to his chair, about to slip a clammy hand inside his boxers when he decides to adjust the view juuuust a little, zooming the photo closer…closer…  and that’s it.

Just the view he needs. (Sue him for having astigmatism.)

He grabs the aircon remote and adjusts the temp to a balmy 24 ‘cause it’d be hella annoying if he can’t get hard because his studio is an igloo.

Some velvety track with soft percussions filter out from his speakers.

A pump of lube from his hidden drawer, wet wipes at the ready for the inevitable clean up, and he’s off to the fuckin’ races. 

His fist wraps the base of his cock, coating his entire shaft with the gel. It's cold, but it immediately warms up to his body temperature as his palm slides up and down his semi. 

Greedy eyes rake your body on his phone screen. Your tits. They’re a vision. He can see just the ghost of your nipples, peaking in the slightest way against your silky top and suddenly his mouth is dry. What would they look like if they’re not hiding from him? For sure they’re puffy. Pretty jet-puffed marshmallows that he’s gonna be putting in his mouth and sucking until you’re falling apart and creaming with just that. He smirks. Yeah, he could do that.

He tugs at his cock faster, licking his bottom lip as he imagines the texture of your pebbled nipples against his tongue. He shivers, increasing the pace of his ministrations, cock now fully hard.

Back to the photo.

Huh. You knew what you were doing—squeezing your breast with your hand. The way the mound of flesh is about to spill over, and your areola is just kissing the edge of the fabric is actually killing him. It’s diabolical. Pure torture.

Had you been here, he’s scooping out that breast, the one you’re holding out to him, so it’s hanging generously from your top, wobbling as he bounces you on his fat dick. 

He feels his eyes crossing, caught in the spell of the hypnotic movements playing out in his mind. He moves his hand faster, cock throbbing and aching for release.

But he’s not there yet.

Closing his eyes, Yoongi lets himself sink back into the memory, rewinding the moments from just hours ago. The sensation of your weight against him is the first thing he recalls—the way your ass fits so perfectly in his lap, warm and soft, like you were made to be there. The way your body had melted into his touch, so pliant, so eager, grinding slightly like you were inviting him to ruin you, and he was more than willing to oblige.

Your lips—he can still taste them if he focuses hard enough—sweet, intoxicating, like the lingering memory of his favorite whisky. And your neck, the way it arched so perfectly for him, leaving him no choice but to press his mouth against it, the faint hint of your skin still ghosting on his lips even now.

If he concentrates, he can almost smell you again, that sweet, delicate perfume that drove him insane. It’s like you’ve imprinted yourself on him. Or maybe it’s the faint traces of your scent that linger on his hoodie, the one you pressed yourself into while straddling him and he could feel the perfect ass against his crotch. 

The thought is enough to send his pulse ticking faster, his head leaning back against the chair as a low, frustrated groan escapes him. He needs you. Fervently. Urgently. Needs you like he has never needed another person ever. 

Jaw slack, tongue dangling from the corner of his mouth, he imagines licking your nipples from side to side and his mouth stretches into a smile. He can almost hear you moan oh yoongi and wow what an ego boost to have you unraveling for him when in reality it’s he who is actually unraveling in his own damn hands. His cock is getting heavier, balls tighter at his impending demise. He tugs and tugs, collecting some of the lube that gathered on the base and pushing it back towards his angry tip, concentrating his movements there.

You’re not in the room but you might as well be with the way your name keeps tumbling from his lips. He is whining like a little bitch in heat, but he doesn’t give a shit. He hasn’t had a satisfying jerk-off like this in a while. He can’t even remember sex being this good. Nothing remotely like the way this fog of lust has him ascending to another plane of existence right now, because you’re so fucking sexy and so good to him and he likes you so damn much and suddenly he’s coming, warm spurts of cum oozes from his throbbing cock decorating his fingers like the rings he used to wear to the knuckle, and fuck he’s still going, there’s so much and god dammit his boxers are soaked but it feels phenomenal.

Chest heaving as if he ran a marathon, he stares at his ceiling, waiting for his heart rate to slow down.

Not long after, he laughs at his stupidity, pulling a wipe from the packet and proceeds to clean up. He sobers up from his horny thoughts, but not by a whole lot. Not when the photo that started it all is still bright and beautiful from his phone. Shit. He cannot wait to fuck you for real. 

Little did he know, something was gonna fuck him up come morning.

AllKpop Scoop:

Confirmed: SUGA of BTS Dating Actress Lee Sung Kyung

Eagle-eyed fans are convinced the duo has been hiding their relationship in plain sight, pointing to their undeniable chemistry during a past Suchwita episode, where sparks were reportedly flying between the two.

The story was everywhere. News sites, entertainment shows, gossip columns, social media—each one milking it for all it was worth. 

Darling of the press, K-drama royalty, multi-awarded thespian Lee Sung Kyung, had resurfaced from her mysterious hiatus, and of course, the headlines couldn’t resist pairing her name with “infamous idol Min Yoongi.” You roll your eyes so far back your head they almost didn’t come back.

The South Korean media was having an absolute field day.

And as much as it hurt to see it, your first instinct wasn’t to dwell on the sting of the rumors. It was to scan every word, every post, every thread, checking if Haneul had been dragged into the mess.

Thankfully, he hadn’t been. You’d be devastated if your little sarang had been implicated in any of these stories. You don’t know the first thing about how to protect the poor baby from these trolls, but you will be damned if you don’t try.

The photo that sparked the frenzy was everywhere—a shot of Sung Kyung leaving Yoongi’s Hannam apartment. That was it. No Yoongi, no Haneul, not even a hint of context. Never mind that the building housed countless tenants or that there was zero proof they were together. It was enough to send the internet spiraling into speculation.

You were scrolling through the comments under one of the reposts, your stomach churning at the sheer creativity of the assumptions being thrown around, when your screen suddenly switched to an incoming call.

Yoongi.

You didn’t hesitate, swiping to pick up almost immediately.

“Sarang,” he starts, his voice soft and familiar, like he already knows he needs to tread lightly. Bro’s really starting with the buttering up.

“Where’s Han?” Was your first question.

“My parents drove him up to Daegu this morning. It’s better if he’s there for now.”

You let out a heavy sigh, rubbing your temple as you sit back. “Just answer one question, Yoongi: is it true or not?”

“It’s a big fuckin’ lie,” he says without missing a beat, his voice steady and firm. “None of it is true.”

“So it’s all bullshit?”

“YES.” he replies emphatically.

The tension in your shoulders eases slightly, and you exhale, nodding to yourself. This is fine for now. “Okay.”

“Okay?” There’s a note of uncertainty in his voice, like he wasn’t expecting you to let it go so easily.

“Yes. Just get your ass here by 7 and not a minute later.” You say, firm.

A pause. Then, with the faintest hint of a chuckle, he replies, “Yes, ma’am.”

Part Five >

A/N: So???? I don't know what that first part was. It just took a life of its own. Anyway, as per ush, please let me know what you thought about the chapter. Feedback is always appreciated. Thank you so much for reading this, you lovely, beautiful human xo

See you in the next half! :)

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[twink-remus-lupin]

i am insanely lacking trans remus lupin ANYTHING . And you're one of the only people ive seen so far who does them/thinks about them similarly to me

so i was wondering if u had trans remus lupin hcs u havent shared before ? (with wolfstar/others or js about him)

THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK i have a lot to say.

headcanons! (teen pregnancy/trans pregnancy mentioned)

he comes out pretty young and has already socially transitioned when he starts at hogwarts. i think Pomfrey would set him up with magical puberty blockers and hormones when he is old enough

chose the name remus on purpose, the little shit.

somehow didn’t realize he could be gay til around 3rd year- thought since he was a guy he had to date women. he was not happy about that

he and lily went on one date to hogsmeade (james cried but gave his blessing) and he ended up coming out to both her and himself at the three broomsticks

they fake dated for a while until he eventually came out to the other marauders and for the most part james was just thrilled to find out lily was single

sirius didn’t react as well but only because he had a baby crush on remus that he didn’t understand yet and was pissed when remus started dating kingsley around 5th year

the other marauders know he’s trans starting 3rd year because of a mixup between them finding out he’s a werewolf and trans

“we know what you are” “okay yes i’m trans” “you’re a werewo- wait what”

alternatively he tells them he’s trans to cover up for his monthly clinic visits when they start catching on to his lycanthropy

5th year he starts hormones and sirius goes insane because his voice is getting deeper

remus dates a couple different guys to distract himself from his growing crush on sirius who is growing out this stupid beard that definitely doesn’t make him want to jump his bones

sirius finally comes out as bi and has a fling with a guy in their year that ends because he’s too in love with remus

they have a weird back and forth for a while until they kiss 6th year and finally start dating (peter called it, james is floored, lily is just glad remus will shut up about sirius’s hair finally. she is wrong.)

they are obsessed with each other, get promise rings 7th year.

Remus keeps having pregnancy scares and Pomfrey is so close to strangling him

“just because you’re on testosterone doesn’t mean you won’t get pregnant remus! here’s a condom.”

sirius and james pay for remus’s top surgery when they graduate- he feels terrible about taking the money but they insist.

they want to get married but decide to wait until after the war

remus isn’t sure he wants kids but as soon as harry is born he’s a complete mess

he immediately asks sirius if they can have one

sirius is thrilled and they start planning for a baby as soon as the war is over

that obviously doesn’t happen and remus is devastated, swearing off the idea of having kids entirely.

after sirius gets out of azkaban they discuss it again but decide that it’s once again not the right time and besides, they have harry now.

and then

oops! they got too carried away and it happened anyways

they have a daughter because wolfstar girldads are so important to me

harry is deeply confused when he’s first told because he had no idea remus was trans or that they were together

he comes around and is a very proud older brother to the little one, doting on her constantly

no one dies and they all live 60 more years as a happy family

okay that’s it i have a bunch more including AUs and whatnot but i’ll stop there for now. I love wolfstar accidental pregnancy trope because they would absolutely be complete idiots about using protection. plus harry being completely invested in his godsister because he’s never had a real family before. he literally would look at her like she hung the stars in the sky.

if you’re looking for a good wolfstar/trans!remus writer i absolutely adore @mrsfrecklesmarauders

she has an ongoing muggle au that always has me completely enraptured

i’ll probably rb this with more at some point ! thanks for the ask🤍

[highhhfiveee]

safety net

pairing: pornstar!mike schmidt x blackfem!reader summary: y/n has a bad date. mike just so happens to be there to catch her. wc: 2.3k tags: fluff? angst? just exposition really. no mentions of porn or sex here! just mike being a hero and reader appreciating him errors in here as usual!

part two: 💸

you didn't really do dating.

you'd tried so many times before to no avail. things would start nicely, people making your laugh float into the air and your heart flutter, but it never got past that. anytime you start to think about these things seriously, the other party pulls away. you're always left in the dust, responsible for picking up the pieces of your heart, gluing them back together, and trying again.

it's exhausting and after your last failure, you're not sure you want to try again.

one chance encounter on a dating app changes your mind. you think it's so foolish how easily you fall into it, giggling and kicking your feet at yet another potential partner, but when your first date is coordinated successfully and the second and the third, you begin to feel safe enough to indulge.

for your fourth date, you've arrived at this fancy restaurant in the middle of the city. you're super done up, wearing a dress that you love but have to return in the morning and your tallest pair of heels. your hair is swept up just the way simon, your date, likes it. you never liked it this way, but he calls you "so beautiful" when he sees you like this, and it makes your blood rush in your ears so you wear it up any time you're around him.

simon was nice, but you didn't have much in common; he was a straight-edge tech guy. he went to bed at 10 every night and woke up at 6 every morning, planning his days out in five-minute increments (he'd excitedly showed you his planner and you had to pretend that you were very very interested 💔).

you, on the other hand, woke up at noon on days you didn't have to work, going to bed at 4 am the night before. you never knew what to do and your apartment was covered in sticky notes donning different tasks: "read book". "wash dishes". "mail off package".

you two managed nice, small talk-ish conversation and he made you feel pretty. the only thing you two had in common was your love for coffee.

you're seated at your table and all goes well up until you receive the check, although you're a little bored. you're picking at your dessert and wondering if the art on the walls is real as simon opens the billbook and slides a card in there.

"i have to go to the bathroom. be right back," he stands, craning his head down to place a kiss on your cheek, and then you're alone, finally tuning into the din of the restaurant. it's busier than you realized.

your waitress takes your bill and leaves to tender you out. simon is still using the bathroom, and at first, it's not worrying. you wouldn't be surprised if he got lost on the way there, but after ten minutes, you start to worry.

the waitress returns to your table and you think you're fine to leave, but she sets the billbook on the table, stating, "did you have another form of payment? it said this card was expired."

you shake your head, anxiously blinking your eyes. "expired?" you open the book to see the $400 total at the bottom of your receipt and simon's card tucked behind the plastic pouch. you take it out and inspect the expiration date. three years gone.

"i--i, uh," you begin to panic. you had no idea what to do. you didn't have $400 in your bank account, $405.72 less than that actually. you didn't have anyone to call to spot you; what normal person had a casual $400 to throw at a friend for dinner? if you called your mom, she would laugh over the receiver the whole time, hanging up on you.

the waitress is staring at you, expectantly, but you can't even meet her gaze. in your alarm, you scanned your eyes around the restaurant and caught simon, in his very noticeable purple suit jacket, speed-walking towards the entrance of the restaurant.

you shoot to your feet, taking off your heels, wrangling up your other belongings and dashing after him.

you hear the waitress shout, "ma'am!" behind you but there's no stopping you. what are you gonna do, pay for the meal?

you're pushing yourself in between other patrons, forgetting your manners. you're hyperfocused on simon, keeping track of his head bobbing through the throng of people.

he's made it outside just a little before you, using a brisk pace to walk down the sidewalk.

"simon!" you yell, watching him speed up a bit until he's a phantom around the corner. "simon!!!"

there are some stragglers outside, just a few eyes on the frantic girl holding her heels and screaming. you're sure they think you're drunk, but you don't care.

you scream simon's name one more time. it's shrill and blood-curdling and something you'd never expect to come out of you. you didn't get upset like this, and you know you're truly upset when you feel a tear hit your arm.

you rarely cried, but here you were, breaking down on the sidewalk outside one of the most expensive restaurants in the state. you take a despondent seat on a bench, trying to catch your breath and stop crying. you take your hair down childishly, and the thought of simon liking it sends you back into tears.

you're a blubbering, snot-covered mess when mike sees you. he's exiting the restaurant, asking for his car from valet when he notices you on the bench, staring blankly into the air.

you're beautiful, and he's unsure as to why you're sitting here in tears. no one else decides to check on you. he takes the initiative.

his hand reaches out to your shoulder and it makes you jump, shouting at him to back away from you. he holds up his hands, muttering, "hey, hey. i'm sorry, i don't want to hurt you. i just wanted to ask if you were okay."

you don't expect the voice that comes out of him. its suburban, syrupy tone doesn't quite match his look; his hair is freshly cut and it feels like there's not a single wrinkle in any of his clothes. they look quality, and expensive. the rings adorning most of his fingers give off the same vibe.

great. one of these guys.

"i'm fine," you snap, wiping at your congested nose with the back of your hand. "i don't need saving, especially not from a nice guy like you."

mike laughs, and you're embarrassed to admit to yourself that you like how it sounds.

"who said i was a nice guy? i just asked if you were okay." you shrink away, avoiding his eyes.

"it's not my fault that you give that off. sounds like a you problem."

mike doesn't stop talking to you, which is surprising. even with all the disrespect, he sits beside you and rummages along the inside of his jacket for something to give you.

you don't admit it, but you're thankful for the small plastic package of tissues. "everyone has problems. there seems to be one plaguing you right now," he leans into your shoulder, eyeing you intently. "wanna tell me what it is?"

you're still cleaning yourself up, taking another tissue out to wipe at your ruined makeup when the waitress marches out of the restaurant with two burly security guards behind her. she points to you with zeal, announcing, "that's her."

the security guards make their way over to you, disregarding mike as he asks, "woah, woah, what's going on?"

"this young lady tried to skip out on her bill." you shake your head irritably, standing to your feet. you're not even half the height of these dudes.

"i didn't, my date did. he put an expired card down to pay and then used the bathroom excuse to get out of it." mike shakes his head. in what world would someone try to escape a date with you?

"makes sense, but you still have to pay for the meal."

"how the fuck am i supposed to do that?" you screech, crossing your arms over your chest. "i don't have any money. i have to return this stupid fucking dress in the morning just so i can pay my rent."

the dress is nice. it's a black satin maxi dress with thin straps and a slit up the side. it's fairly simple, but mike can't deny how well it fits you, and how good you look in it.

"i don't know what you're going to do, but you better do something or we're going to have to call the police."

"fucking call them! i don't care," you retort, and so begins your back and forth with the security personnel.

"you don't care?"

"no."

"are you an idiot? you just don't care?"

"okay, one, i'm not an idiot and two, i really don't. this whole situation is fucking stupid. i can't pay the bill, okay? i don't know what to tell you."

"my mom always said that as a female, you should never be broke. maybe it's time for you to stand on that corner right there in that pretty dress and sell your---" the man is cut off by a sharp "hey, watch yourself. i'll fucking kill you." from mike. he steps to the security guards, who retreat a little when they realize he's not joking.

you don't know this man, not even his name, but he asked you if you were okay then and now, he's standing up for you, even after you accused him of being a nice guy. you make a mental note to apologize to him after all of this.

"i'll pay the fucking bill. how much is it?"

"it's $400, mr. schmidt," the waitress says, her face awash with red. Last name basis? How often did he come to this expensive ass restaurant?

mike looks at you and then back to the waitress, saying, "charge it to my tab. tip the bill." The waitress nods excitedly, echoing, "thank you, thank you, thank you" as she scurries back inside with the security guards. They give mike dirty looks the entire way back, giving up just before disappearing into oblivion.

mike faces you. He's a little disheveled in the eyes, the irritation he holds inside written all over his face. somehow, even his scowl is attractive.

you rub your hands over your goosebumped arms, the chill in the air wildly apparent. mike is instantly shrugging his jacket off and draping it over your shoulders, giving you a friendly smile. it's warm inside, and smells like the expensive department store colognes you snuck samples of as a kid. for some reason, you feel at ease.

"i'm sorry about your date. he sounds like a dickhead."

"yeah," you agree, biting at your cracked bottom lip. "i guess it's my fault. i really shouldn't have trusted a guy who planned his day by fives."

"hours?"

"minutes."

mike sucks air between his teeth, cringing at your words. "he sounds like a psychopath."

"maybe he was," you hum, using the lapels of mike's coat to pull it tighter around you. "dodged bullet."

"dodged bullet," he repeats, smirking down at you. his hazel eyes sparkle. you don't know why you feel so... positively unnerved yet tranquil in his presence. who was this man?

"mr. schmidt?" a valet worker in all white exits an expensive-looking, deep gray sports car. the interior looks like a spaceship, and you can't help but crane your neck a little further to get a better look.

you're not paying attention as the worker drops the keys into mike's hand and mike hands him a hundred-dollar bill he fished from his pocket. you're just focused on the car, wondering a million things. how much was it? how was its gas mileage? did it take premium gas or something more?

"do you need a ride home?" mike holds the keys up, jangling them in front of your face. you connect the dots and let out a loud belly laugh, completely blindsided.

"this is your car?"

"i...think so?" he teases, watching the happiness fall from your face. a ride home. why would you want to go home to be alone, once again collecting the jagged pieces of your broken heart from the floor?

mike instantly stiffens. "that was a joke," he clarifies, but you dismiss it with a raise of your hand.

"no no, it was fine, funny even. i just...i don't want to go home right now."

"do you want to come back to mine?" mike doesn't know if it's too forward, but it doesn't hurt to try. you needed company, and nothing would ever compel him to leave you here after everything. he catches the way your face twitches and raises his hands in defense again. "no funny business, i promise. just so you're safe, and not alone tonight."

you don't think over it very long. you'd been to plenty of strangers' houses, and this was only one night. you were sure you could trust this man. after your date from hell and nearly going to jail, what was the harm?

"okay, i'll come. thank you," you muse as mike leads you to the passenger side of his car. he opens the door for you, and you crane your head to him before you sit down. you're so close you can see the flecks in his hazel eyes, the freckles dusting the bridge of his nose, every single individual hair that peppers his jaw and mouth. it makes you forget your name.

"i'm y/n, by the way." he nods and smiles at you, wide and bright. suddenly, your legs feel like noodles.

"nice to meet you, y/n. i'm mike."

"mike," you repeat as you lower yourself into his car. "mike."

who knew where this would lead you?

been up all night writing this ayyeeeee, i write SO MUCH! going to work on writing blurbs, i promiseeeeeee. also this is very cute. i'm excited to delve into their story because it will be mostly pwp (for ficlets and blurbs) but definitely more structured for longer fics. can't wait to see where it goes!

[once-upon-an-imagine]

You Keep Me Hangin' On - Steve Harrington

A/N: sooo, apparently it worked 😂😂😂 thank you to everyone who voted, I might keep this up since it helps me focus on a specific story😊 I mixed three different requests here so I really hope it makes sense, this one is mostly angsty but I am planning on a part two, so let me know what you think  

Requests - dawninparis​ asked: is this how you request something? i don’t know i’m a bit new to all this 😳 anyway i saw you were accepting st request so i was thinking maybe steve and reader are in an established relationship but with all the stuff happening in s4 and reader not being aware of all the supernatural stuff she gets jealous of all the time he spends with nancy and the fact he is hiding everything from you just to protect you and just basically a lot of angst (bc i like to suffer) and ending however u like even tho my heart is easily broken with sad endings 

- Anonymous asked: I would like to request a Steve story that takes place in season 4 where him and reader are dating already. Reader has noticed how awkward he has been around Nancy and vice versa. How they’ve been talking a lot more (good thing Eddie was there to keep them company😉). [full request here]  

- Anonymous asked: Hello babes, I'm not sure if you want to write this but may I request for a Steve Harrington angst to fluff fic? Haha! I just want to torture myself again with all these angsty stories. Somewhere around, reader is pining for steve and thought that she have a chance with steve but the latter thought that maybe he's still not over nancy. Reader felt hurt / embarassed by this and decided to date someone else, when she did steve realizes that she's the one that his heart has been longing for the whole time and not nancy. Thanks

Warnings: pretty angsty and Steve is kind of an asshole but also a jealous asshole xD and Jason (he deserves his own warning) let me know if I missed anything 

Disclaimer: I don’t own Stranger Things :) gif isn’t mine :D  

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

You Keep Me Hangin’ On

Set me free why don't you, babe Get out my life why don't you, babe 'Cause you don't really love me You just keep me hangin' on

You had known for a long time now. You had just, for some reason, held on to a stupid little hope that kept you hanging to this stupid little crush. Although it wasn't that little. And that voice in your head that kept you hanging sounded an awful lot like Robin insisting that Steve felt the same way you did.

You tried to believe her. You really did. Steve was very caring and affectionate towards you. You remembered the first time you drove him home, drunk, and he asked you to stay with him. And you did. And he said it felt nice to not wake up alone. And then, it became a natural thing between the two of you. He would call you whenever he needed you. And you would call him whenever you needed him. And he showed up. He always showed up. Which made you believe Robin when she said he felt the same way you did. But neither of you spoke about it. You hugged. You kissed. You did more than kiss. You couldn't imagine your life without him. But you weren't entirely sure if he could do the same. You feared that he could. He could live without you.

And right now, it was more evident than ever. You instantly dove into the water when he was pulled back into the lake. You pulled the bats off him and fought them with whatever you could find before Nancy, Robin, and Eddie also appeared to help. You were about to help him stop the bleeding right before Nancy ripped off the bottom of her blouse and started patching him up. And you saw it. You saw the way Steve looked at her.

"You're bleeding" you were snapped out of your thoughts when you heard Eddie by your side.

"Huh?" you asked, confused.

"Your arm" he pointed out. "It's bleeding" he repeated and you looked down to see that he was right. You hadn't even noticed. You were bleeding. Badly.

"Holy shit!" you panicked a little, not really knowing what to do.

"Here" he said, gently grabbing your hand and taking the black bandana out of his back pocket.

"Oh, I don't want to stain your bandana. I know that's your favorite one" you told him, not really noticing the smile that appeared on his face when you did.

"Don't be ridiculous, princess. It's just a piece of fabric" he insisted, grabbing your hand and cleaning your wound gently. You lifted your head from your arm to watch Eddie as he worked on tightening his bandana around you. You found yourself smiling a little at how careful he was being. He did not seem like the loud, careless guy you always saw in school. "How's that? Is it too tight?" he asked, worriedly.

"N-no. That's perfect" you smiled. "Thank you, Eddie" you told him.

"You know, it was pretty badass, w-what you did" he chuckled.

"It was?" you asked, feeling a little nervous for some reason. You never really thought of yourself as badass enough to get that credit from Eddie Munson, who you considered to be one of the most badass people you knew.

"Yeah, I mean, jumping in the lake and fighting those bats. That was metal, princess" he smirked.

"You also jumped in the lake and fought those bats, Eddie" you reminded him.

"Yeah, but after all of you ladies did" he insisted.

"Well, you still did" you told him. "And that says a lot" you smiled.

"So, uh" Eddie cleared his throat, pulling away from you a little. "This place is like Hawkins, but with monsters and nasty shit?"

"Yeah, pretty much" you nodded.

"Wait, watch out for the vines" Nancy said as Robin started walking around. "It's all a hive mind" she explained.

"It's all a what?" Robin asked.

"All the creepy crawlies around here" you told her. "They're, like, one or something" you told her. "Step on a vine, you're stepping on a bat" you instructed. "You're stepping on Vecna" you finished.

"Shit" Eddie said, next to you.

"But everything from our world is still here, right? Except people?" Robin asked.

"As far as I understand it, yeah" Steve said.

"So, theoretically, we could go to the police station and steal guns and grenades and whatever we need to blow up those bat things that are guarding the gate" Robin suggested.

"I highly doubt the Hawkins PD has grenades, Robin" you told her. "But guns, yeah, sure."

"Well, we don't have to go all the way downtown for guns" Nancy added and everyone looked at her. "I have guns in my bedroom" she shrugged.

"You, Nancy Wheeler" Eddie started. "...have guns, plural, in your bedroom?"

"Full of surprises, isn't she?" Robin asked, excitedly.

"A Russian Makarov and a revolver" Nancy explained.

"Yeah, you almost shot me with that one" Steve said.

"You almost deserved it" Nancy smirked back at him.

You tried to hide your upset expression but Eddie seemed to notice before he threw his jean vest at Steve and he glared back at him a little.

"For your modesty, dude" he said, making Steve roll his eyes before putting it on.

"Hey, are you okay?" Steve asked, walking closer to you.

"I'm fine" you said with a firm smile.

"Did you hurt yourself?" he questioned, looking at your arm.

"Yeah, but don't worry. Eddie fixed it" you told him.

"Oh" Steve said, not entirely loving that part. "O-okay" he sighed.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just a scratch" he said, trying to make you laugh.

You barely smiled before you followed Eddie and Robin who were climbing on trees and rocks, careful not to step on the vines. When Robin accidentally stepped on a vine, the five of you felt the Earth moving under you when an earthquake happened. Your instinct almost made you run to Steve, but you saw he quickly grabbed Nancy, who was closer to him, and he pulled her to his side. You couldn't even register the whole thing before you felt two arms grabbing you and making you fall to the ground with him as you felt Eddie's arms tighten around you.

"Holy shit!" you heard Robin, not so far from you.

"So guns seem like a pretty good idea to me" Eddie said.

"Yeah, me too" you said, feeling your cheeks burn a little at how close you were to the metalhead and not noticing a pair of eyes glaring your way. "Uh- um" you cleared your throat. "Thanks" you smiled shyly.

"Don't mention it, princess" he said, helping you up.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

As the five of you walked to the Wheeler's house, Steve could barely register what Nancy was telling him. His eyes were glued to Robin, you, and Eddie walking ahead of them. Specifically between you and Eddie Munson. He noticed he was trying to make you laugh because he could see the worried look on your face. And the worst part was that he was succeeding. He didn't like the feeling he got whenever you laughed at something Eddie Munson said. He didn't like that you had his bandana on your arm. He didn't like that he was walking a little too close to you and the worst part was when he saw his hand trying to reach for yours.

"Uh, yeah, Nance, hold on a second" he said, not even trying to understand what she was talking about as he ran over to the trio in front of him.

"Hey, Eddie" Steve said, catching up with you. "Uh, could I... talk to you?" he asked, making Eddie look at you a little confused. You simply shrugged and Robin pulled you away to go join Nancy instead, leaving the two boys behind.

"What's up, Harrington?"

"Hey, man. Uh... Listen, I just, uh... I just want to say thanks. For saving my ass back there" he smiled.

"Shit. You saved your own ass, man" Eddie told him. "I mean, that was a real Ozzy move you pulled back there!"

"Ozzy?"

"When you took a bite out of that bat. Ozzy Osbourne? Black Sabbath? He bit a bat's head off onstage" he explained as Steve looked at him confused.

"I don't-"

"You know? Doesn't matter" he shrugged. "It's very metal, what you did. That's all I'm saying" he told him.

"Thanks" Steve smiled.

"Henderson told me you were a badass. Insisted on the matter, in fact" he explained.

"Henderson said that?"

"Oh yeah" Eddie nodded.

"Shit!"

"Kid worships you, dude. Like, you have no idea. It's kinda annoying, to be honest" he mocked Steve. "I don't even know why I care what that little shrimp thinks, but, uh, guess I got a little jealous, Steve" he smirked. "I guess I couldn't accept the fact that Steve Harrington was actually a good dude. Rich parents, popular, chicks love him. Not a douche? No way, man. No way" he chuckled. "That, like, flies in the face of all the laws in the universe and my own personal Munson doctrine" he explained, making Steve laugh and roll his eyes a little. "Still super jealous as hell, by the way. Which is why I would never have jumped in that lake to save your ass. Not under any, uh... normal circumstances. Nope. Outside of D&D, I am no hero. I see danger and I just turn heel and run. Or at least that's what I've learned about myself this week" he muttered the last part.

"Give yourself a break, man" Steve insisted.

"See? The only reason I came in here was 'cause those ladies came in straight after you. Now, I was too ashamed to be the one who stayed behind" he explained. "But, your girl, right there" Eddie said, pointing at you, walking ahead of them. "She didn't waste a second. Not one second. She just dove right in" he told Steve as they stopped walking for a moment and Steve looked at you while you walked with Robin. "Now, I don't know what's going on or what happened between you two, but if I were you, I would not take her for granted, man. 'Cause that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen" he told her. "And if you let her go, someone else might not be so stupid" he informed him.

"Are you talking about... someone in specific?" Steve asked, glaring a little at him.

"Maybe" Eddie shrugged, patting his back. "I'm just saying, Harrington. Don't be the douche I always thought you were" he said before he walked away from Steve.

As soon as you all got to Nancy's place, she, Robin, and Eddie started making their way upstairs. You were about to follow them when Steve gently pulled you back.

"Hey" Steve said, smiling nervously at you, a few steps down. "Uh- I just... um, I wanted to ask if uh-" he said, running a hand through his hair as he always did when he was nervous. "If w-we're okay? I mean, are you- uh are you feeling okay?"

"Are you?" you asked, a little confused.

"No- yeah, uh I'm fine" he sighed. "I just wanted to check if you were also... fine?"

"I'm fine" you said with a firm smile before you turned around and you tried going upstairs but Steve stopped you again.

"It's just um... you got hurt" he said, stroking the back of your hand with his thumb as he looked at the bandana wrapped around your arm.

"So did you" you told him. "And I think yours is... much worse" you said, looking at Nancy's blouse wrapped around him.

"No, it's fine" he insisted.

"Great. So, you're fine. I'm fine. We're both..." you sighed. "Just fine" you said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, frowning.

"Uh- nothing" you quickly said. "We should... get up there-"

"No, what did you mean by that?"

"Steve, this isn't the time or the place-"

"But you're upset!"

"No, I'm not, I just told you, everything is fine!" you insisted.

"Really? So, if everything is fine, why are you spending so much time with Munson?" Steve asked, accusingly.

"Ohh, you noticed that? I figured you'd be too busy with Nancy to even pay attention to anyone else!" you replied.

"Wait, is that what this is about?"

"No! I didn't mean to ugh-! Just... forget about it, okay? We have bigger things to-"

"Shhh!" he shushed you, holding up his finger.

"Um, excuse me?"

"Did you hear that?" he asked, looking the other way and walking away from you.

"Hear what?"

"Henderson!" he said, walking around the empty room.

"Well, it finally happened. He snapped" you muttered under your breath.

"HENDERSON!"

"What's going on?" Nancy asked, walking over to you with Robin, and Eddie.

"I don't know. He thinks he can hear Dustin-"

"I don't think! I can hear him! HENDERSON!"

And then, you heard it.

"Oh, my God! DUSTIN!"

"There has to be a way for them to hear us!" Eddie insisted as the five of you tried to look around the room.

"Wasn't there a way that Will communicated with Joyce when he was here?" Steve asked you, pointing his flashlight at the light in the middle of the living room.

"THE LIGHTS!"

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"You sure you're okay?"

"Yes, Robin, for the fifteenth time, I'm okay" you replied as you two tried to grab anything you could use at the War Zone.

"It's just that you and Steve have barely spoken since-"

"Since he decided to stay back at the UpsideDown because Nancy was cursed by Vecna and he now refuses to leave her side?" you snapped a little. "Sorry" you sighed. "There's just... a lot going on right now" you told her.

"I know that, but... well, you and Eddie on the other hand-"

"What?" you asked, confused.

"Come on, you can't tell me that there's nothing there-" she chuckled.

"There's literally nothing there" you laughed. "I don't think Eddie likes me that way" you rolled your eyes.

"Do you like him that way?" she asked, curiously.

"N-no" you said, nervously. "I don't know. Like I said, there's too much going on right now. And Eddie has been nice to me. He's always nice to me and... I don't know this isn't the time to focus on stupid guys, okay?"

"Love, it's never the time to focus on stupid boys" she laughed, making you laugh a little too but she quickly stopped when she spotted Vickie on the other side of the War Zone with her boyfriend.

"Rob" you said, feeling sorry and placing your hand on her arm.

"Have you ever felt like someone just ripped out your heart?" she asked, looking back at you.

You smiled sadly at her and then looked past her. "Yeah, I... have an idea" you said silently and she followed your stare to see Steve laughing with Nancy at something she had said. "Aw, well that's fun for me" you smiled, sarcastically. "I'm gonna go over there, okay?" you quickly said, walking away from Robin as she rolled her eyes and walked over to Steve, punching his arm.

"Ouch! What the hell, Buckley?!"

"Well, I wouldn't expect to find you here" you turned around hearing that dreadful voice.

"J-Jason" you said, nervously. "Yeah, well, it's just... scary times" you smiled. "Uh- I'm... sorry about Chrissy" you told him.

"Want my advice?" he asked, getting closer to you. "Shotguns are not good for much of anything past killing small birds" he said. "I mean, they got power, sure, but not much range" he said, as you stepped backwards, creating space between the two of you but he got even closer. "And that's just gonna force you into close-range combat, then someone can just grab that barrel like this..." he said, grabbing the weapon from you. "...and redirect it" he said, smiling, making you feel uneasy. "Well, you look nervous" he chuckled.

"Uh -like I said" you tried to smile. "Scary times" you told him. "Could you let go, please?"

"Sorry?"

"She said 'let go'" you heard Steve behind you and you let out a sigh of relief.

"Harrington" he said, letting go of the gun. "Didn't see you there" he said, stepping away.

"Well, now you do so..." Steve said, nodding his head so he would take the hint.

"Lovely seeing you" Jason said, before turning to look back at you.

"Hey, you okay-?"

"We need to go, now" you said, grabbing his hand.

"But-"

"But nothing" you said, pulling him with you. "Eddie's outside" you whispered.

"Right" Steve muttered a bit upset. Munson.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"Hey" you were snapped out of your thoughts when Eddie sat down on the grass, next to you.

"Hi" you smiled.

"So... I guess this is a dumb question but... how are you feeling?"

"Funny, I was just going to ask you the same thing" you smiled.

"Me? I'm having the time of my life, princess. Are you kidding me? We're about to go to the UpsideDown and fight for our lives, really... it's where I pictured my life at this point, he chuckled, making you laugh a little.

"You know, you don't have to do this, Eddie" you insisted.

"Are you trying to rob me of my hero arc, princess?" he said, making you laugh, which you didn't know how was possible with how anxious you were feeling. "I was just going to tell you the same thing" he told you.

"It's just... you've been through a lot in like... what, 48 hours?"

"Yeah, it's been intense but... well, you being here kinda makes it better" he admitted.

"It does?" you asked, feeling your cheeks burn.

"Yeah" he insisted. "I mean, if... it were up to me, I wouldn't want the situation of us hanging out to be in a creepy world fighting this... monster but... I guess it's pretty badass" he chuckled.

"Well, if it involves you I would assume it would have to be badass" you smiled, making him blush a little. "So... if it were up to you... what would the situation be? U-us hanging out?"

"Well- uh-"

"Hey, Munson!" Steve said, suddenly appearing and interrupting the two of you. "Um... Henderson's asking for you" he said.

"Um- sure" Eddie said, looking back at you. "Sorry, princess. Raincheck?"

"Sure" you smiled as he got up and he helped you up too. "See you in a bit" you told him before Steve replaced his place.

"What was that?"

"What was what?" you asked, confused.

"You and Munson?"

"We were just talking" you shrugged.

"Is there something going on between the two of you?"

"What? What are you talking about, Steve?"

"I just find it interesting that every time I look at you he just happens to be there" he said, glaring at you a little.

"Well, maybe we were just talking about our part of the plan, since you made me stay back with him and Dustin!"

"I knew you were upset about that! Nancy and I just decided this was the best way to make the teams!"

"Oh, what a lovely coincidence that you get to go with Nancy!"

"And Robin!" he added. "Why does that make you so upset? Because you don't get to come and physically kill Vecna with us? I need you to stay back with Eddie and Dustin!"

"Why? Because you don't trust me as much as Nancy!? You don't-" you stopped yourself before you could say 'You don't love me as much as you love Nancy'.

"Nancy knows what she's doing!"

"Oh, and I don't? We were all down there, Steve! And in case you didn't notice, I was the first one to jump when you were dragged back into that lake! Not Nancy! I am just as capable as she is-!"

"I didn't say you weren't but I just..." he sighed, running a hand through his hair, frustrated. "I need you to stay back with Dustin and Eddie okay?"

"Fine!" you said, reluctantly. "I can't do this anymore Steve" you sighed.

"Sweetheart, I know it'll be hard, but we have this plan and-"

"No, not that! This!" you said pointing at him and yourself. "I am tired of just being your option when Nancy is not around!"

"That's not true and this isn't the time to-"

"Right... it's never the time" you sighed.

"Well, not when we're about to go face Vecna in the fucking UpsideDown!"

"You're going to face Vecna with Nancy and Robin! I'm staying back with Eddie and Dustin!"

"That's not how it is!"

"Yes, it is! That's the plan that you two came up with! Together!"

"Look, what do you want from me? It made more sense this way!"

"Just admit that you still have feelings for Nancy and be done with it so I can just... I don't know, move on!"

"M-move on? From us?"

"There is no us, Steve! Is there?"

"Why would you say that?"

"I don't know, Steve! I'm tired! I'm tired and I can't do this anymore! It's not fair!"

"Ugh! I'm not trying to make you feel like this on purpose! I don't have feelings for Nancy, okay? Why does everyone think that I still have feelings for Nancy?"

"Oh, really? Everyone thinks so? So, I'm not the only one then!" you said, feeling your heart starting to break.

"No! I didn't mean it like that! Nancy is my friend! Okay! That is it! I care about her and I don't want her to die!"

"Nobody wants her to die, Steve! But you keep following her around like a lost puppy-!"

"How would you even know since you decided to stay with Munson every chance you get?! I can't believe you're being this dramatic over Nancy. SHE'S MY FRIEND!" he snapped. "Look, I don't want to fight with you, we are all on edge, and... I just... I need to do this, and I need you to stay with Dustin and Munson!"

"I don't want to fight with you either, Steve, and I know this is probably the worst possible time, I just-"

"Hey, guys!" Dustin shouted, interrupting you. "Time to go!"

Steve sighed, tiredly and looked back at you, not really knowing what else to say, so you did.

"You know what? You're right, we have more important things to deal with right now" you smiled with tears in your eyes and you placed your hand on his arm. You were about to follow Dustin but Steve pulled you back, pulling your hand.

"Listen, I care about Nancy, yes. Of course, I do. But, I swear, she's just my friend" he told you. "And I care about you too. I do, a lot" he said, nervously. But something wasn't letting you believe him anymore.

"As a friend?" you asked, with your voice breaking a little.

"It's... complicated" he said, making your heart break into little pieces. "And I swear we'll talk about it, after this, I just-" he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

Something was telling you that he would never love you as he did Nancy. That little voice was becoming louder than Robin's telling you he loved you just as you loved him. And you felt your eyes watering. And you knew he could see it, but he didn't say anything. Because you knew time was running out and you had to follow Dustin. So you just smiled sadly at Steve and cupped his cheek with your hand.

"I love you, Steve" you whispered, having the strangest feeling in your heart that this may be the only chance you would get to tell him this, so you kissed his cheek. Like you always did and you gave him the saddest smile Steve had ever seen on someone. "And I really hope you get her back someday."

To Be Continued

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

[Part 2] 

A/N: sooo, I am definitely not evil enough to just leave it there :D this is definitely going to have a part two... so let me know what you think xD (and also, who you think she should stay with) 

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Eco Warrior Duchess Sussex merching winter gear like an idiot by u/Lensgoggler

Eco Warrior Duchess Sussex merching winter gear like an idiot So, I live in a country that gets cold. Very cold sometimes. Similar to Canada.And I own one puffy coat. ONE. I bought it 5 years ago. Most people here do not own many of similar function coats - and I assume it's true for Canada. Nobody owns 3 new identical coats simultaneously. Why? Because these are fucking expensive, and buying many is just plain stupid and pretentious. We also don't tend to own that many identical thickness new hats, gloves and boots. Same reason - expensive and pointless. When it comes to winter gear, everything has to have a function. Kids tend to have two or three sets of things because they tend to get wet and/or dirty, but not adults.​Blue, boots #2Beige, boots #1 with furBlack, boots #2But Duchess Meghan, the eco warrior, with a new website and last name, wears three different new puffy coats and two pairs of similar but different boots (the beige set had boots that have fur) in three days. She also wears the coats unlike people in actual cold places (we zip them up usually, or wear a thinner one). She wears a scarf like nobody who is actually cold does - but of course, if she wore it the way it'd actually be warm, you couldn't see it... And on two other occasions she has no scarf at all, so it's not scarf weather for her? She must have an immune system of steel. To Harold's credit, he seems not not give two hoots about what he wears. Has put on Invictus puffer after getting to the event, and has a nondescript layer underneath, and a very basic hat, if any. I wonder what goes on in MM's head... "This is my husband's work thing, I'll tag along and wear all kinds of different getups because this makes me appear successful and awesome because I have sooooo many clothes and accessories!! I am such an inspiration!" I didn't list the 'Valentine's Date pap shot' because it looks like she rewears the red monstrosity from the NY trip. I wonder what happens to the coats back in warm California. Will she return them? Donate them? Rewear them? I'm pretty sure WME has got nothing to do with MM anymore. Because this is a very bad look indeed, anyone with a brain would see that. A 42 yo woman obsessed with her clothes and faffing about at an event she has nothing to do with.​ post link: https://ift.tt/b4M9Swr author: Lensgoggler submitted: February 16, 2024 at 10:10AM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit

[tgmsunmontue]

I'd know you anywhere - 4/5

Set when Hangman first meets Rooster. Bradley and Bradford Bradshaw are twins. Most people know this. Some people need to be brought up to speed. Quickly.

Explicit out the gate. Also an everyone is alive AU because I need the softness when I’ve got two other fics on the go with DADT and canon deaths.

ONE TWO THREE

PART FOUR

                “A couple of things before I go and get him. First, he doesn’t usually sleep with guys he’s just met. Usually he dates them, so, you’re already unique…” Ford notes the almost immediate flush appear on the apples of Seresin’s cheeks and okay, this isn’t the arrogant and combative naval aviator he’s been working with the last few months but actually maybe a guy who is sweet on his brother. “However, you hurt him I’ll help him hide the body, our family will give us iron clad alibis and if they do find any DNA, well, it can’t be pinned on either of us because we’ve got identical DNA.”

                “You’ve put a scary amount of thought into that.”

                “Lots of procedurals growing up. No idea how accurate they are but wouldn’t matter to you, you’d be dead. Now. Next thing. You need to unblock his number because I am not going through this BS again. All you had to do was message him and ask why the fuck he blanked you. He would have realized immediately that you’d just met me and you both could have saved yourselves the agony of the last four months…”

                “Sorry that jumping to the assumption that he had an evil twin wasn’t the first thing I thought of,” Seresin mutters, rolling his eyes, but he relaxes, the door opening further and Ford grins, slaps him on the chest.

                “Yeah, you’re going to fit right in.”

                “Fit into what?” Jake asks, looking confused.

                “Can I come out yet?” Lee calls and Ford looks over his shoulder, can see Lee leaning out the window in the very dim light of the lamp in the car.

                “Yeah, get up here…” Ford calls out, and then he turns back to Jake. “Right. Lieutenant Seresin, I don’t believe we’ve been officially introduced. My name is Bradford Bradshaw, callsign Kanga, or Kangaroo, or Roo depending on who you ask. Sometimes I also go by Ford. I believe you know my little brother –”

                “I’m older!” Lee snaps automatically and Bradford gives Seresin a look, tries to convey that he hopes he knows what he’s getting himself into. He’s pretty sure Seresin doesn’t care at all.

                “By a whole fucking five minutes, and it was only because I fucking pushed you out myself, otherwise we’d still fucking be there,” Ford snaps out the familiar rejoinder, rolling his eyes. “Anyway, my older but shorter, and far less impressive brother. Bradley Bradshaw. Callsign Rooster, or Roo, again depending on who you ask… I believe you’ve already met?” Ford smirks.

                “God, can you stop being a dick now?”

                “No appreciation at all,” Ford says, stepping back to let Lee come and stand beside him.

                He tries to imagine what Seresin is seeing, because right now they’re not in uniform, and they have different styles. But to an untrained eye they do look very similar, but he’s sure that Lee will take him through the most obvious things to help him tell them apart.

                “Not only are you both B Bradshaw but you have callsigns that can get shortened to Roo? That can’t be…”

                “No. He’s Kanga and I’m Roo. Like in Winnie the Pooh?”

                “I have no fucking clue what you’re talking about.”

…            …            …

                “It doesn’t matter,” Bradley says, and Jake thinks that it might matter, maybe even a lot, but right now he’s taking in the height difference, the part in the hair, the small hopeful look on Bradley’s face and the smug smirk on Bradford’s.

                “Jake… Hi.”

                “Bradley… You want to come in?”

                He’s not propositioning him, but the fact that he’s here, that as soon as Bradford realized the missed communication he somehow found out where Jake was staying and brought Bradley here. That Bradley had been talking about Jake enough for Bradford to put all the pieces together. He hadn’t spent enough time with Bradley to really get his heart broken, but he had gotten his hopes up and now they are soaring with complete abandon, and he wants to talk to him, and kiss him and hold him in his arms… He wants the dates and the domesticity.

                “You go in, I’m just going to have a last word with Seresin…”

                “Don’t tell me what to do!”

                “Well stop just standing there like an idiot then!” Bradford says, then he’s shoving Bradley, who stumbles and hits the door and then Jake’s chest and he puts a hand out to steady him, even though it’s probably not needed. He’s got his hand on Bradley after months apart and he lets his fingers gather the fabric of his shirt and just hold on.

                “Hi…”

                “Hi. You don’t have to talk to him.”

                “It’s okay, he’s already given me the shovel talk. And pretty sure we’ve got him to thank, because he put all the pieces together.”

                “He does not need a bigger ego…” Bradley mutters, but his eyes are roaming over Jake’s face and Jake stops resisting the urge, leans in to give him a quick chaste kiss.

                “Go, make yourself at home. Well, as much as you can…” Jake says, because temporary lodgings do not generally make for a cozy environment but he doesn’t think either of them care about where they are right now. He watches him over his shoulder as he heads toward the kitchen and Jake turns back to Bradford.

                “Not going to invite me in too?”

                “Uh…”

                “God, the look on your face right then! Sorry, just… I hope you’ve got the same stubborn streak when it comes to relationships as you do to flying, because he’s going to speed run through dating you. Totally going to make up for the last four months.”

                “What?”

                “He’s going make up for lost time and just… let him. Okay? Just being there and letting him is going to make him happy. So you need to decide pretty quickly if you’re all in, or cut your losses and let him go. A heart broken Lee is my least favorite Lee.”

                “Lee?”

                “Bradley. I call him Lee. He calls me Ford.”

                “Right. I guess I can’t just keep calling you Bradshaw can I…”

                “Nope. There are three of us after all…”

                “Three?”

                “Our dad’s a naval aviator as well. I’ll let you go in and maybe have a conversation with my brother. And I look forward to getting to know you on better terms.”

                “Yeah. Sorry about that.”

                “It’s good man. I mean… you could have punched me and we still would have figured things out faster. But here we are.”

                “Thanks.”

                “Didn’t do it for you. But you’re welcome anyway.”

                He gets another friendly slap to his chest and then he’s giving a little two-finger salute, jumping down the steps and heading toward his car. Jake closes the door and turns around to find Bradley watching him.

[all-pacas]

house live-ish blogging: paternity (still only here for the Team, sorry old men):

this is i think the only episode chase does a crossword, and he's not even shown to be good at it, and yet. chase and his lil crossword books. you'll never take this headcanon from me. he goes through one 1001 puzzles to stump you! book a month 😌

also add it to the characterization pile, we now know three things about chase: strange accent, nepohire, bad at crossword puzzles

the letter cameron wrote "as" house:

[unreadable] to first say thank you for contacting my office in regards to my son, Daniel. I am sorry […] about your son's present condition. I have reviewed the date you forwarded to my office. There certainly are some interesting re[…] Daniel's testing thus far. I also have some concerns from the CT Scans I reviewed. Although I r[…] the work of the physicians you consulted previously, I do feel it is time that Daniel met […] specialist. I feel it is imperative for Daniel to seek advanced medical treatment immediately. Often […] neurological condition, time is the patient's greatest enemy. I am unable to make appointments in my office at Princeton-Plainsboro teaching hospital. I only consult […] on patients that are referred to my office from within the hospital. I do however see patients daily […] our walk-in clinic. This clinic is designed to treat patients who need to see a physician within Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. We are unable to schedule appointments within the walk-in clinic. I am scheduled to see patients daily Monday through Friday, between the hours of 3-6 PM. Thank you for contacting my office and I look forward to consulting you and your family. Sincerely, [signed] Greg House, M.D.

i love this because it is such a bad house impression. she isn't even trying. i also love the "listen. there is no way you will get an appointment. here is where i, gregory house, will be at the clinic. every day. just show up. no this isn't sketch, i, gregory house, definitely am writing this letter."

i will forgive cameron for literally anything but "the kid is having neuro symptoms, no i did not ask if he'd had head trauma recently" is an mess for sure. like i get it's set up for the episode to happen but. that's bad. love house telling cameron good work and then IMMEDIATELY rescinding it. "you're an only child aren't you?"

"you shoved it in my face just to humiliate me" — this is actually something cameron does a couple times in s1, she takes disagreement very personally; she assumes when house thinks she screwed up in heavy that he's doing it out of personal feelings and gets really upset about it too. she is thin skinned. she does not take criticism well, at all.

(cameron is a fundamentally self-centered person. this isn't a criticism. so is house. so is half the cast. but even her selflessness tends to be couched in external validation and praise: she does want to help people, but she also wants to be recognized for it: she flees situations difficult for her, she is not as selfless as she pretends/wants to be, she is thin-skinned and advocates for patients she sees herself in (or the people she cares about in) most of all. this is not unique to her but it is something i don't see talked about much -- except for by her legions of bashers who of course mean it completely different. she's not a selfish bitch, she's genuinely selfless and giving and kind. it's just her perspective is much more limited than i think even she is aware of. house dismissing this case is an intentional slight against her, not house being house.)

anyway there's a couple early episodes in s1 where cameron is the main whiteboard writer, which i think the show stopped when they realized it was actually kind of weird to make the One Girl office secretary lmao

chase early on wins points by suggesting the kid's parents are lying, and spends the rest of the episode chasing that high lmao. he keeps checking house for answers and guessing (pretty accurately) what house wants them to say and notice. he doesn't have a clue what is happening with the patient, but i love the mix of chase's asskissing/"political talents" and perceptiveness put towards the ridiculous purpose of "impressing the boss" instead of actually doing his job (also something about how chase is a people pleaser, or at least, tries his best to be liked and say and do what is expected of him in every situation)

once again foreman is coming up with most of the ideas and doing most of the work this episode lol, although the focus on him is less intense than in the pilot (chase, if anyone, is getting the most characterization this episode, although it's mostly he's kind of dumb and a suck up). but house actually defers the treatment to him almost entirely -- something house kind of did in the pilot as well.

chase and foreman positive interaction alert!!! joking about the dna test and chase suggesting they pretend the kid has huntington's. love to see it

the kids go to house because they don't agree on the patient having MS, the resulting argument reveals that it's foreman for and cameron and chase against. foreman is wrong, but gets his way with house. i feel like this is a pattern

"[the parents] aren't suing, but i think only because chase asked them" the asskissing powers emerge fully formed from the waves--

house asking foreman if he'd like some coffee and then pouring him some 😳

chase casually sexually harassing cameron by suggesting the patient stare at her breasts lmao. like i should find it annoying but a) cameron also seems to find it funny and b) they're such cute s1 friends okay

generally i love s1 and the episodes but i do feel like this one is kind of weak. i can't really say why, it just doesn't hit for me the way most of the first half of s1 does. i think the case just kind of feels weak; the show usually does a good job connecting the patient or case to at least one of the main characters, but there's really none of that here. nor do we really learn about the characters in any way, or have a dramatic case to make up for it. might be the weakest of the first half.

[consanguinitatum]

And Now For Something Completely Different: I look for an early 1993 Michael Sheen project!

As everyone who reads me regularly knows, I'm a David Tennant researcher/archivist (it's what I do!) and write A Tennantcy To Act, a Substack about his career. But last night at an ungodly hour, a question from a MS fan on Twitter got me amped to find a missing Michael Sheen project...so that's what I did. My body might be pissed I stayed up til 2 am (I'm an OLD!) but my soul and spirit are cleansed. I found it! So if you're a Sheen fan, buckle up. Let's take a ride on the Sheen side (and oh yeah, I just learned Michael's mum has retweeted all my research. So there's that!) The question was about a 1993 episode of a 1991-1996 ITV series, narrated by Edward Woodward, called In Suspicious Circumstances. Michael's Wiki had the series listed, but no further info on the title of the episode Michael appeared in, nor any date but 1993. Last night this fan asked Michael himself if he could remember the name of the episode (as apparently it's a bit of a mystery for his fans). Michael couldn't recall. So I went on the hunt. Luckily a tiny clip of the episode was featured on Twitter, so I could use it as a reference. And boy did it end up to be important!

The smart researcher analyzes what they've got. We see men in mustaches, bowl hats and sack coats using wagons instead of cars, so 1890s? Early 1900s? Michael plays "William Wright" and looks like he's fixing a wagon wheel. He reads his bible, and has an accent. Keep these details in mind. They'll be important. Okay - some background on the series: In Suspicious Circumstances was an anthology series which re-enacted historical crimes. Beginning on 16 March 1993, it broadcast three one-hour episodes, each of which contained two thirty-minute stories. Okay, so that means there are nine possible mini-episodes Michael could've been in. But which one? Let's narrow them down! The series' first episode aired 16 March 1993. It was called "Laugh Baby Laugh" and was about Elvira Barney, acquitted of murdering her lover in 1932. The second mini-episode was called "Shadows of Doubt" and was about Robert Hoolhouse, a laborer hanged for murdering a farmer's wife in 1938. Here are some newspaper articles about this broadcast:

I felt pretty comfortable ruling these two out immediately - mostly because both crimes were set in the 1930s, and our clip tells us Michael's episode was way before then. Moving on! Now let's talk about the third episode, which aired 30 March 1993. (I'm deliberately skipping over the second episode because I think that's the one Michael's in. Back to that in a second.) Anyway...the two mini-episodes from the third episode were called "Falling Starr" and "Good as Gold", and were about two very different women found dead on beaches...one in 1931, the other in 1900. Here are a few newspaper articles about these episodes:

The 1931 one we could rule out. But the 1900? Hmmm, it's a possibility, sure, though the clip we have sure doesn't look like it's anywhere near a beach town with sand dunes like Great Yarmouth, right? So that also seems improbable. Now let's examine that second episode, which was broadcast 23 March 1993. The first of the two mini- episodes was entitled "Dancing With Death" and was about the 1960s Glaswegian serial killer known only as Bible John.

Um, the 1960s certainly doesn't sound like it fits the clip Michael's in, right? So what's the second mini-episode, then?

Well, it's set in Suffolk in 1902 and is about a murder of a servant girl in "a scandalous affair in a Suffolk village which may have led to murder." Sounds promising! The time period certainly seems like it would fit. But what is it called? After all, no one was sure what the episode was entitled, because if they had, they would've known which episode Michael was in.

It's called "Candle In The Window!" So now we have to switch gears here to find the final proof. There are two possibilities, time period-wise, so we have to go to the source to find out if we can determine which one is the right episode. And by that, I mean newspapers of the period. After all, In Suspicious Circumstances was a historical series about real-life crimes. So I started with the Suffolk one, which I thought the most likely.

Remember we talked about Michael's character's name, and how he was working on a wagon wheel? Well, here are a few articles printed at the time about the scandal, the murder, and the resulting trial. From the Hull Morning Telegraph and the Nottingham Evening Post, both 6 November 1902:

This is a LOT of text - and newspapers at the time loved to print drama and florid language and up the scandal (they didn't have television to satisfy that urge, I guess?) But here are the relevant parts.

Notice the name of one of the witnesses: William George Wright. And gee.....he's a wheelwright! Ya know, a maker and repairer of wagon wheels!

Bingo! The circumstances of this case, Michael's character's name and occupation, and the descriptions in newspaper blurbs about the 23 March 1993 broadcast of In Suspicious Circumstances all line up.

"Candle In The Window" is the episode Michael was in. I published this earlier today on Twitter and within an hour, industrious Sheenies collated all my work (with my blessing and permission!) and updated Michael's Wikipedia entry to include this new information. I'm just out here doing what I do - for the fandoms. I wish David-bloody-Time-Lord Tennant was this easy to find *harumph*! Anywaaaaaay...... Peace out!

[my-catsface]

HEELLLLOO EVERYONE!! I am going to talk about THE MAGNUS PROTOCOL and a Theory (maybe theories?) I have so spoilers for the first two episodes of The Magnus Protocol and major spoilers for the ending of The Magnus Archives!!!

(Someone has very likely said this before so it might be repeat information)

Okay. okay. Okay. okay. You guys know… that one comment Alice made about the voices reading statements, right? How there are three voices you can hear when statements are read aloud? We’ve got Jon and Martin as Chester and Norris, but she also mentioned an Augustus there too. “Auhhh but who’s that?? There was nobody else in the Panopticon-“ WRONG!! It’s our babygirl Jonah Magnus.

First off, during the end of the Magnus Archives we get a little “after” dialogue from the girlies about what’s going on. They mention something happening to Simon and why it’s probably for the best that they didn’t find any bodies. But that’s the thing. They didn’t find ANY bodies. Not Jon or Martin sure, but Elias’s corpse should’ve just been hangin’ around in there. But this seems to indicate that it wasn’t. So where’d to go? Probably the exact same place that Jon and Martin went.

Okay okay SECONDLY!! This image (below)

Is taken from the trailer for the Magnus protocol, and I’m sure a lot of people are familiar with it already. The two things I want to draw attention to here are the J.01 and J.02 lines. J1 and M1 are… you know… Jon and Martin. But the J2 doesn’t really have an answer unless you think that it’s Jonah, whose body was never found when the Panopticon fell. Honestly I don’t know what’s up with the master and slave lines but I’m sure those (and the fact that they failed/are undefined) is important.

What I DO recognize however is the date that’s set for 2023 at the very bottom. Keeping in mind that Alice mentioned all this freaky stuff started happening a year ago, and the series takes place in 2024, this is likely the very event we’re seeing of the computers being all wonked out. Though the question I mostly have here is, did someone (or something) put those three in there intentionally, or did that just happen to be where they went after the end of TMA? Furthermore, why NOW? Why now years later (aside from real-life time happening (because I am 100% sure that Jonny has an answer for this and I want to know it)) in 2023? Is there something special about the specific date? What’s up with the EPA Polution Preventer (and why is it spelled wrong)? The memory test went okay, do the three remember themselves? Do they know where they are?

Okay. OKAY. I’ve rambled on for a while but don’t worry we’re close to the end of my scattered, disjointed thoughts. Because the one question I have now is “Who’s listening?” In TMA it was the Web, right? The web, with tape recorders drawn to the lighter (which I’m pretty sure is what was happening but I might be a lil forgetful). But there’s no lighter here? And we aren’t using tape recorders, we’re using… computers, maybe? A cellphone, possibly? The entities have been shown to not really play nice with technology… but there was ALSO the video of the dude who ate his own computer so I’m honestly not sure what to think. I don’t know if it’s the Web, still. Honestly I don’t even know of Smirke’s Fourteen can be APPLIED here. This might be one of those instances where TMA listeners have to forget some things to make sense of this different world. But if it IS applicable to an entity, the best guess I have would honestly be the Extinction. That might explain the EPA Polution Preventer (seems pretty extinctioncore), it might explain Jon Martin and (possibly!) Jonah here, having just come from an apocalypse/the end of the world/AN EXTINCTION EVENT, but aside from that? I honestly am not sure. Because we don’t know how many of the entities are actually intelligent. Sure they can like and dislike things but it’s kind of been very solidified in how much they aren’t very thinking, aside from the web.

So uh… what’s the deal? I have… no idea. I am frothing at the mouth in anticipation. I love this podcast. I love both of these podcasts… this is amazing… this is fantastic. I’m in love. Please anyone tell me if you have any ideas or counter evidence for any of this because I would LOVE to talk to you about all this!!

[askauradonprep]

Poly Pirate Crew Timeline

I should not have been allowed to do this rewatch. I am back on my poly pirate crew bullshit and I'm about to drag a bunch of new followers down with me if I have my way. :P

SO.

About three months before D2 (and 3 months after D1) the crew first forms. They're described as 'hardened mercenaries' 'cutthroats' and 'a bunch of scoundrels' but also as kids who were deemed not worth very much by the Isle. There are bumps and bruises in getting some of them into teamwork but overall, things go really well. Uma quickly inspires confidence by doing things like diving into the sea to rescue Gil or waiting at the mouth of a collapsing cave to make sure her entire crew gets out.

Over that three month interval, the crew not only makes major territory grabs (including Mal's former territory) and even begins to be taken seriously by some of the adults. They also start hanging out and spending most of their time together, so when it comes to doing things like making out as stress relief or going to places together, it's usually with each other. At some point it occurs that they're all pretty much dating each other but they have bigger things to worry about so it's not that big of a deal.

Descendants 2 goes down, Uma's missing for a whole year. Harry takes over and manages to hold down the fort but the crew is a mess without Uma and he knows it. Even people who don't hang around the crew like Ginny Gothel notice how close knit the crew is and can no longer imagine Harry without them. Harriet notes that getting Harry a VK Day application is pointless because he won't leave without his crew. They also note he's been miserable without Uma.

Descendants 3 goes down, Uma returns! The crew is elated but only for a moment. Uma has to tell them the gut punching news that the barrier is going to stay closed forever and they're all going to die on the Isle. Rather than dwell on that, she focuses them on preparing to protect the Isle as supplies dwindle and chaos breaks out. Obviously this crisis is averted by Mal letting down the barrier and setting them all free.

The crew is in Auradon now! They take about a semester to get caught up on educational requirement differences and their 'we're REASONABLY certain they won't destroy Auradon' stamp of remedial goodness. They make things official and enjoy both running wild and having actual DATING moments. During this time, they find an abandoned villa in Auradon that they claim as theirs (by hiding it from everyone else with magic). Then they're officially free to pursue their own interests and they all....split. Everyone is on their own for about a year. Uma's happy for them chasing their dreams but also devastated to lose them. Well, after that year, Drey calls a meeting in a warehouse to see everybody. Harry reveals he's spent that time fixing up the Lost Revenge to be seaworthy and now they can go wherever they want and do whatever they want. The crew gets back together and sets sail for about a year and a half (totally not doing revolutionary things to stop certain escaped villains from hurting kids or bringing down places like the Isle, nooooo).

Uma is invited to be in charge when Mal, Jay, Evie and Ben go off to do some alliance building. She accepts and her crew accompanies her back. Most of them settle the villa and get their 'living on land' ducks in a row, but about six get Uma's office ready and help her out (yes this is from the Merlin verse but IDC, I like it, so it happens here too. :P)

Once Mal and Ben return, Uma's crew goes back to the water. They return periodically but for the most part, they are now full time pirates. After a while they start considering themselves PRETTY MUCH married. During one of these visits back, Drey gets pregnant with the crew's first kid born during the relationship (Valor being born before hand) at about age 26. This kicks off the start of lots of kids. Does this stop them adventuring, treasure hunting or pirating? Absolutely not.

There's a lot of details to fill in in between these but this is the general gist of how I imagine that relationship going.

[troutfur]

Where am I from anyway?

Let's go! Response roundout! I got a couple people who got it correct but let's first review all the wrong answers.

@somebirdiedude

I wanna say Australia or Oceania as a whole? Just vibes + pseudo-memory of u saying that to base it off of tbh

I used to date an Australian genderfluid guy and we were very good friends for years. I don't know if any of my speech habits in English were derived from that but I don't think so? He didn't have a super pronounced aussie accent to my ear at least. Is it that perhaps? But anyway. No. Wrong hemisphere entirely, or hemispheres rather. Next!

@gophergal

Well, your first language is Spanish (iirc) and I'm pretty sure you aren't from North America or Europe, which doesn't narrow it down much. I'm just gonna guess El Salvador

My beloved mutual. With so little information you actually came so close, but you missed the mark. Props for guessing Central America though. We're so ignored in the world stage unless it's to complain about how many of us are desperate enough to try our luck being smuggled up north.

@jainkens

Brazil? The name makes me think it's from some Latin American country, I vaguely remember something about a parrot as a reference or something, and the color scheme of it is green which subconsciously made me think of Brazil. But broadly somewhere in Latin America (I am pretty sure that includes Brazil

I... I can't believe I'm only now noticing my Yellow-Naped Amazon Parrot fursona combined with my name being José makes it seem like I was deliberately referencing José Carioca from classic Disney propaganda pieces films Saludos Amigos and The Three Caballeros. Just look at them!

But anyway, no. I am from Latin America but not Brazil. Spanish speaking Latin America.

@jayinserenity

I can't remember for sure, but for some reason when we first started interacting I think I was convinced you were some brand of non-UK European. I could not begin to tell you Why that was what my brain insisted upon, but it was swiftly corrected lmao.

This reminds me of this one time I was playing DnD with an international online friend group. As we were coordinating our timezones, our DM, who was Scottish was reviewing all our locations. He listed me as part of the Europe timezone and when I said I wasn't European he was all like "Oh it doesn't matter that you weren't born here, you're still as much a European as the rest of us" and so on and so on. And I was so confused. Turns out one of my other friends in the group just straight up forgot I told them where I'm from and assumed Spain based on Spanish being my first language. So they told our DM and our DM in turn assumed me saying I'm not European meant I was an immigrant.

@heathfall

I know the answer so I'm going to give a blatant lie. Nevada, USA

SO GLAD THIS WAS THE ONE GUESS THAT HAD ME BE USAMERICAN. Legitimately, I really hope I don't come across as a gringo online. I was dreading this was gonna be a majority answer since it's just standard the internet is American. But I'm pleased how it seems the Latin American vibe shines through even with people who don't know the answer outright.

@tigerclawstar-shaped-cookie

peru i think. i cant. remember. something like that. evaporates

Too far south dude. But props for guessing Spanish-speaking Latin America.

And now for the correct answer!

@kingmystrie

i know you're in south america but idr if you're from argentina or guatemala it hink it was guatemala

@offkeyed-reason

idr if you mentioned it on the server but im pretty sure there was this name generator set that you asked for a specific region for/clarification bc Guatemala is different from other places. idr whose generators they are but yeah. Guatemala's my final answer

🎊🎊🎊

Yup! Guatemala, Central America. Although I like the note that you thought I could be from Argentina. It is indeed true I do reblog a surprising amount about Argentina. Blame it on their current president. Javier Milei is such a fascinating trainwreck of a man personally. It'd be funny if he wasn't running his country into the ground.

[sleepyanimal]

7 years?!

Wow! I can't believe it's been 7 years since I have posted on this account, or really used tumblr much at all! So much has changed in these last years, I am 7 years older believe it or not!!!!

First things first, I doubt anyone will see this as I am sure many of the folks I used to interact with have moved on from here, or changed accounts. If you remember me, or see this, I would love to say hi <3

After leaving tumblr, I was able to get a pretty large following on tiktok doing aquarium related content, as well as specimen preservation tutorials and process videos (I'm @fishydaddy if you're curious!). Sadly, as many of us are probably aware, tiktok will likely be unavailable in the US this upcoming year, and I felt like it was time to come back to tumblr as it was a huge part of my adolescence. I'm not sure how much this site has changed in the years since I have been gone, but it has been absolutely fantastic going through old archival content and getting all nostalgic and inspired :,)

Looking at this old blog and seeing the work I did as a teenager makes me feel all kinds of things, but it mainly has given me the spirit to get back into art and posting again. I would love to have my content available across many platforms and hopefully set up my own website soon. I will keep this blog for archival reasons, but will likely move all of my newer postings to a new blog. I have a super hard time choosing a name for a brand (???) or social media handle, and have changed it MULTIPLE times throughout the years, but would really like to stick with one from now on. Since I am known as fishydaddy now (a very silly joke name I used not thinking I would actually gain popularity and have a hard time changing it after lol) I will probably continue using that, or a similar name, as fishydaddy is taken on a lot of platforms. I will post an update on what my new username is and how to find me across social media if y'all are interested!

If you've made it this far and are invested, here are some life updates!

----------------------------------------------------

I was able to go to college and get a degree in aquarium science, one of my main passions is aquatic animal husbandry, so being able to get a degree in a niche topic was amazing!

After moving away from home after a gap year post high school, life got pretty hard (although it was always pretty hard, just in a different way). I feel like a lot of my inspiration and drive towards art faded as I didn't have the time or energy to refine skills and learn new things. There have been a few moments where I have gotten back into it, but it has been fleeting, as been good mental health.

When I was posting on this blog, I came out as non-binary (I think I was 16 or 17 at the time?), and being in this community was a huge reason that I was able to learn about gender identity, expression, and the existence of non-binary identities. It was hard at first with family acceptance and self acceptance, as well as strings of bad relationships with straight men who didn't see me as the person I am, but all these years later I am happy to say that the age old quote is true, it DOES get better :,)

I now have been on hrt for over 6 years, and become more comfortable with myself.

~~~~I am non-binary still, on the more masculine end of things but a feminine masculine person, and use they/he pronouns~~~

Transitioning obviously doesn't fix everything, and new struggles come along with transitioning, but I am so happy with the direction my life has gone. I met an amazing person about 4 years ago and we have been together ever since. He is the first cisgender man I have dated where I felt completely understood, accepted, and valued for being truly myself. It also helps that he isn't straight (If you're a young trans person and dating PLEASE do not date someone that says they're " (whatever sexuality) but will make an *exception* for you". I've done it three times and boy oh boy does it leave some lasting scars and blows to self confidence!

Aside from gender stuff, my mental health journey has been a rocky road, but I am nearing a point where I feel I am able to work towards a better life. From childhood, I have always had intense anxiety and obsessive thoughts, which increased drastically during adolescence and morphed into full blown chronic depression, social anxiety, and executive functioning issues that I was never able to fully improve on.

When I came out to my parents at the age of 18, instead of acceptance, I was taken to an autism specialist. I guess my parents thought the reason for being transgender was autism in my case. Well, turns out both can be true (sarcasm), and 8 years later, my parents are very accepting of both my gender and neurodivergence.

This past year, I was finally able to see a psychiatrist that was able to help. My first psychiatrist was from all the way back when I was 15 and I hadn't seen one since getting prescribed antidepressants. Well turns out there are nifty genetic tests that can screen for genetic differences that can cause sensitivities or resistances to certain medications, as well as indicate certain chemical deficiencies or mental health conditions. I was on the wrong medication and given a misdiagnosis for over a decade. I feel like I wasted so much time and suffered through those years. There were good times and beautiful memories to look back on, but I was really sick for years and wasn't taken seriously/unable to be helped based on my description of the problem. It wasn't until I had a horrible depressive burnout episode when I went back to college for a fisheries and wildlife degree that I knew I HAD to do something ASAP. I completely wasted time and money, only to ghost my school, teachers, and classes without being able to communicate how badly I was doing. I took a break from school, got a job in fish health research, and got burnt out AGAIN during one of the best jobs I have ever had in my life. I knew I had to do something, and I finally was diagnosed with ADHD through genetic testing and a new psychiatrist.

The best way that I can describe this feeling I've had since I was in 5th grade, is nausea, dread, terror, fatigue, and just an overall feeling that something is very, very wrong, all the time. It wasn't just anxiety, it was something deeply unsettling that I could never escape. Well, it turns out that I literally am lacking very important chemicals for human functioning due to rapid uptake and processing of those particular chemicals, such as dopamine and adrenaline. I finally feel like I am not broken, that all this work I have been trying to do through self-betterment and therapy that didn't work wasn't my failure or lack of will. It is literally that I blast through dopamine like nobody's business and then am left with nothing, leading to a horrible feeling all the time. Since being prescribed the proper medication, I finally feel like a normal, functioning human being. Some days are hard still, but that's true for everyone. It's like I can finally see through this invisible veil that has been in front of me for my whole life. I feel like I can talk to people like when I was a kid, be myself, work on unmasking, and truly enjoy life and have fun.

Now that I am doing better, I am so excited to start working on what I love again, which is art! My medium has changed many times throughout the years, from pen & ink, to plushies, and more recently into specimen preservation and sculpting, but I always love doing EVERYTHING (ha! who would've guessed I have adhd????). My plan for this upcoming year is to really focus on practicing art, as well as create more things to share with people, be it content, or sellable art. Recently, in the town I live in, an awesome vintage market has opened and has space for an oddity seller which is right up my alley. Fingers crossed that I can get a spot there!

I also want to work more on educational content surrounding aquatic life, from marine biology, to keeping aquariums and general fish health management. This is one of my biggest passions, and my special interest. I have learned so much working in the aquatics industry over the years and would love to share the important information that I have acquired from working in public aquariums, commercial aquatic facilities, and just being a hobbyist on the side.

If you got all the way down to the bottom of this post where I just totally word vomited my entire life story, first of all, who are you sweet angel baby? (not an mfm quote I promise), and also thank you for taking the time out of your day to read some stranger's post????

Oh! and please add me on neopets if you play!!! (babymoonbetta)

Here are some fun bonus photos of me and my partner <3

[symphorine]

time to return to the scene of the crime (ritual site) (solas did the crime)

ill skip over most of the quest bc it's just exploring the ruins and there's not much new. i did spy a halla statue, but nothing that really gives any insight as to what they're ruins of. we go through pretty extensive built and paved sections, so i'm wondering if we're in a part that used to be the city of arlathan proper, with plenty of different buildings, proper streets, etc.

did take a couple of screenshots of the view from the floating ruins, which gives an idea of what arlathan forest looks like.

i was a little confused about the mountains, but got this map from the fandom wiki:

we do see the white spire to the east, a mountain in antiva, and a mountain range on the west and southwest, which are the hundred pillars from tevinter. my guess is the ruins we're at are in the southwest side of arlathan forest, since we seem to be looking at a mountain range rather than a singular peak? arlathan forest is also right on the coast. iirc in the tevinter night "three trees to midnight" story, we follow characters captured by qunari and set to work between the edge of the forest and a beach. it's set a few years before DAVG, so whether qunari forces are still attempting to penetrate the forest or have been forced to give up because of veil jumpers' effort is up in the air. it's possible that when the antaam broke away from the rest of the qun, some of them were there.

there's also this map from tevinter nights, also found on the fandom wiki, which i find less readable but is a little different (more up to date with recent lore additions/changes):

the end of the quest at the ritual site sees us getting the dagger and harding awakening some magic powers when she touches the pure lyrium dagger, a first for dwarves, as far she (and anyone else) knows.

interesting thing: in the following screencap, taken at the beginning of the quest, we see where the dagger fell. the ground is cracked, and blue light comes from those cracks, indicating magic.

in the following two screencaps, taken at the end of the quest, where the dagger was planted into the ground briefly, there's actually what looks like lyrium veins growing:

it looks like it's not part of the rock either, but growing from nothing on top of it. i don't know what to make of it, just thought it was interesting. surely if lyrium was self replicating like this dwarves would have lyrium farms instead of mines, right? maybe it's just a small scale phenomenon?

other than that, the big thing is obviously harding talking with words and a voice that are obviously not her own. transcript of what she says while she's glowing blue from what's happening:

"This is the eternal hymn, the prayer, and the proclamation. Isatunoll. I am. We are. Free again. Whole again. Here again. Here... again..."

During this speech, she floats up in this rock, then bursts out of it. Again, it's got clear lyrium veins (god I just realized lyrium veins is so literal with lyrium being the blood of the titans. very cool).

And then she turns darkspawn into stone. This is stuff that is explored in her companion quests, so not much to say at this stage. Harding is very much a conduit for new lore in the game, in ways that did irk me a little, but i'll get to that when i progress to her quests. i do wish she had been more of her own character. it also makes it absolutely baffling to me that she can perma-die if you pick her as a second team leader in the ending, and frustrating, like she was really just a vehicle to deliver this knowledge to the player.

before we come back to the lighthouse, we get a little peek at our two elven gods

i looooove ghilannain's silhouette. i think elgarnan should have been more fucked up tbh. what we do learn here is that the darkspawn ghoul that we chased during the quest was controlled/influenced heavily by ghilannain to retrieve the dagger, and seeing as it failed, the gods now decide they need to make a new dagger - ghilannain specificies "made of red lyrium", for some reason. clearly regular lyrium wasn't a problem, since they wanted solas' dagger, but maybe it's a preference thing...? anyway. we now have. the entire motivation for the game i suppose. i guess it IS made obvious how pivotal the dagger is but... idk. it's not very impressive. in general i feel like they suffer from a crucial lack of development in the game. yes, of course as the main antagonists, we dont really spend a lot of time chatting to them, but i wish we'd gotten a bit more depths. especially since later we can hear snippets of conversation! also they have a scrying pool of sorts??? how does it work??? can they only see blighted creatures??? does it include wardens??? where the fuck are they in this screenshot??? it does look like elven architecture but i'd like to know where EXACTLY they are. somewhere in arlathan forest still? why would they not go themselves to pick up the dagger? is it too low-level work for them? are they too weak to risk it yet?

it does remind me tho of when they got freed and you saw solas turn towards them and look afraid. suddenly he didn't seem like the Dread Wolf, but like a very small and scared man. this is probably one of his greatest nightmares. good moment i liked it.

we go back to the lighthouse to have another huddle. harding says that she feels like something took her over and is worried it might be possession - neve reassures her, saying dwarves cannot be possessed because they aren't connected to the fade. i wonder if this is meant as like, a physical impossibility, or just that since dwarves dont dream or access the fade as easily, theyre just so much less likely to come into contact and make a deal with a demon?

a mage rook says it's not the magic they know, and then we have a beautiful bit of dialogue:

Rook: It's clearly Stone-focused. Which makes sense. Dwarves are Children of the Stone. Harding: Mages connect to the Fade. Dwarves reach out to the Stone? Maybe? Rook: Maybe. Harding: I guess we don't have any real answer.

i dont know guys i feel like you could have dug into this a little more T_T. especially frustrating playing a rook who is a scholar haha.

then you can tell harding how you view her new magic. not sure what it influences exactly apart from some dialogue later. i think maybe that's my gripe with a lot of those decisions being made a big deal out of (through the purple notifications): a lot of the time, it's just some dialogue you get or don't, not really something that has a real mechanical consequence (like actually influencing outcomes of situations). i might be wrong though.

lighthouse conversations after this: you can have a proper one with harding, where she expands a little more on isatunoll, and it being a proclamation of being , not "i", because that's a single being, and not "we", because that's multiple but separate. I think the closest analogy I'd give to what isatunoll seems to refer, which would have been the state of the dwarves before the titans were made tranquil, is a hive mind? maybe not quite that, but clearly dwarves were connected to each other through the titans, and to the titans, in very intrisic ways. harding also says she can't find any accurate mention of isatunoll in the books she's reading ("none of the histories are right."). as an aside, she never seemed particularly interested in dwarven history, or underground dwarves - it makes sense that she'd want to look into it now and suddenly feel closer to it, but where did she get those books on such short notice? did they just appear in the lighthouse?

speaking of the lighthouse! the library is now debris-free, and bellara's area, the workshop, is now open, though in the same state of neglect as the rest. we also of course now have the meditation room and get to arrange it. i was delighted to see a mourn watcher rook brings an urn with them... presumably it contains?? skeleton bits?? since nevarrans don't burn their deads??? anyway. imagine just lugging a whole urn around for months on end as you're travelling through thedas. tbf the mage thing, the magical project, also does not seem like something you'd bring with you for that. where were these objects before? who knows.

we unlock this codex entry in the meditation room:

On Life in the Lighthouse This ancient logbook is filled with meticulous veilfire runes. Though it is encoded, flicking through it offers vignettes of borrowed memory. Fearful refugees are ushered to the Lighthouse through eluvians, emerging from the infirmary and libraries as soldiers, spies, and scholars. Gardeners plant long-extinct herbs that grow, are harvested, and wither in the blink of an eye. The sharp smell of distilling medicine wafts from a window, and poison for the enemy drips into a vial. The arguments of a war council go on late into the night; fobidden songs are sung freely, with filthy lyrics substituted for the Evanuris' names. Finally, a heated conversation silhouetted against glass with quick shadows darting behind it. The argument ends with a wordless but unmistakable impression: "You summoned them: you feed them."

i love every scrap we get of what things were like for the ancient elves. it's nice to learn a bit more about the rebellion; it also seems like the lighthouse used to be a much larger place, if it housed all these people and rooms (libraries, plural, but also some kind of alchemy lab for poisons and medicines, at the very least, as well as gardens). and someone recorded this, wrote it in encoded runes - a member of the rebellion presumably? i was also wondering if it could be a spirit observing them, but solas makes it pretty clear later on that spirits were implicated in the conflict whether they wanted to or not, so i dont think there'd be any that just observes, especially in the heart of the rebellion.

solas sassed me so bad during this conversation with him i yelled at my screen. he asks if he overstated the danger, i picked the option to say he didn't, and he told me "How unfortunate for you." in the most mocking way. SOLAS. WHAT IS THIS. this man has no manners.

anyway, we learn that solas knows some of who we are and draws a parallel between him and us. I think that happens no matter what you choose - I'm gonna transcribe what happened with beryl, but I remember a similar dialogue with daea as well.

Rook: Then you know that powerful opposition doesn't frighten me. I find a way to get the job done, whatever it takes. Solas: I suppose I was not so different when I started. Rook: Started what? Solas: My rebellion against the Evanuris -- the "elven gods", as you call them.

side note: fun early apparition of "whatever it takes".

solas then tells us that the gods "wish to reclaim their dominion over the world." that's fine, i guess, but it rubs me the wrong way that we hear our main antagonists' goals through a third party who's assuming it's what they want. that could have been a fun twist! you can perfectly keep elgarnan and ghilannain as evil bad guys while saying they have more complex or specific aims than solas says or thinks; then that could contrast solas' conviction that he is always right, as well (until he realizes he was wrong and decides to destroy the world again about it, of course).

and then some fun stuff:

Solas: First, the blight. What exists in this world is a bare fragment of its power. The rest is imprisoned... until they release it. Rook: (Why blight the world?) I don't understand. Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain were elves like you, right? Why would they want to blight the world? Solas: It is my fault. As the Dread Wolf, I was a thorn in their side. Solas: When my efforts weakened their grasp on the elven people, they grew frustrated. Then desperate. Rook: And turned to the blight. Solas: Once the corruption took hold of them, they were blind to its horror. It was just another source of power for them. Solas: Now, they would blight the world without hesitation and call us backward and foolish for opposing them. Rook: (It's bigger than what we have?) The rest of the blight is imprisoned? There's more than what's in the world already? Solas: Yes. Centuries ago, the magisters of Tevinter opened my prison. A tiny fragment of the blight escaped. Solas: That fragment grew beneath the earth and led to the Blights that have swept across this world. Solas: However terrible the blight is now, it is a mere fraction of what we will see if its full power is unleashed. Rook: (It didn't escape?) The blight didn't escape with the gods? Solas: Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain escaped largely empty-handed, fortunately. Most of the blight is still trapped in the prison I created ages ago. Rook: So what we saw at the village, that's them not at full strength? Solas: Correct.

these are the questions you can ask solas about the blight before continuing the conversation. all interesting tidbits! the blight existed before they turned to it - we know it's the anger of the titans, a consequence of making them tranquil. it was considered bad, including by the evanuris: solas saying that once the corruption advanced enough, they were blind to its horrors implies that they used not to be. the blight we know and have known since origins is only a LITTLE of it, which is humbling. the titans were gods in their own right; that their fury is much bigger and worse than what we've seen also makes sense.

also, the magisters did unleash the blight, but it is not of the maker. someone call the chantry i need to destroy their entire ideology asap (if everyone else' beliefs are getting fucked, i don't see why the chantry should be different. but i will complain about this later for sure). this confirms that the golden/black city was arlathan. corypheus said in dai that he throne of the gods was empty, so either he saw the evanuris in their prison but did not recognize them as gods, or the magisters just didn't go very far into that prison (plausible! it was a ritual that demanded a lot of power and they resorted to a lot of blood magic just to enter the fade physically, let alone go further into it. I wonder if it would have demanded less power if they hadn't been trying to get into solas' prison? also, was it on accident or not?). it is intriguing that the blight escaped first with no god, and now the gods escaped with no blight. were they held in different sections of solas' prison? also, honestly, what the fuck was that prison like? thousands of years imprisoned with your fellow tyrants in the fade? AND additionally: the evanuris and the forgotten ones seem to have disappeared at the same time, but solas only ever talks about imprisoning the evanuris, despite legends saying he imprisoned both (in different prisons). and we see anaris later, coming from and being send back to the fade. what happened to the forgotten ones exactly? clearly they're not in with the evanuris.

anyway. then solas tells us to find the tyrants and bullies, the cruel and the corrupt, because that's where elgarnan and ghilannain will seek followers, as they "care little for the elves". I do agree they don't care for the well-being of the elves, for sure, but i was expecting a "you were ours and you shall be again" angle to be played much more strongly in the game. it soooort of happens, with the way elgarnan talks to and about the dalish, but not that much. but now we've establish that anyone who works with the gods is evil anyway.

it's frustrating because then it's just reinforced that the venatori and antaam are purely evil, with very few exceptions - or not even exceptions, just... contact with members that show another facet. I'm thinking of the crow and venatori lovers in treviso, and the brief dialogue with the butcher in treviso as well. the enemies being uniformly bad, something that is never questioned, is definitely a disappointing and frustrating aspect of the game, especially when racism is thrown in the mix with the antaam (the way theyre depicted is dehumanizing and sexualized and just. so bad. plenty of other posts have touched upon this but it bears repeating.)

finally, "And when you see Varric, please tell him that I... regret what happened." SOLAS WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU.

actually this does remind me of something i forgot to write about earlier, about the very beginning of the ritual site quest, when harding and neve have a bit of a fight. Harding at one point mentions Varric, and Neve says that he knew what he was in for, he knew what the risks were. so clearly varric is not a taboo subject in front of rook. HOW did rook not stumble into conversation that made them realize varric was dead and an illusion during the game? it must span at least MONTHS.

caught up with my screenshots folder, so ill play some more tomorrow probably! I think from next week, as I go back to work, I'll prob play during the weekend and write these posts during the week, but we'll see.

[avaritia-apotheosis]

Phantom Children: Redux | VIII. A Synonym of Madness

A DPxDC crossover // Read on [AO3} or [FFN.net]

← Previous Chapter // MASTERPOST // Next Chapter →

◆◆◆

Two Years Ago…

Endurance training lasted three months, and at the very end of it their twenty-person cohort was reduced to ten. Dusan said that he must have been going soft. 

If that was ‘soft’ then Danny shuddered to think what Dusan’s ruthlessness looked like. 

Phase Two of their training was…different. For one, instead of the familiar base of Infinity Island, now Danny’s cohort was transplanted to some desert. For another, the expectations and demands placed upon them fundamentally increased compared to the three months of endurance training they had. 

But all the same, the training was grueling, the sun was hot, and sand got absolutely everywhere. 

Oh. Can’t forget about the chores either.

Henri looked up from the whetstone, disbelief spreading across his face. “You were going to…quit?”

“Well, yeah?” Danny rubbed the back of his neck. “I mean— I’m not now . I’ve come too far to quit now, but back then? I was about ready to quit by week two .” He sighed, leaning his head back against the cool stone wall. “You had to admit that I wasn’t cut out for it back then. Hell, even now, I still don’t think I am.”

Henri shook his head, the dagger ringing in his hand as he glided it against the whetstone. “I envy you, Danny. You must’ve had a pretty good life before coming here.”

It’s because he came here that Danny had a life. But Henri wasn’t supposed to know about that. “What makes you say that?”

Henri scoffed. “Well—” He lifted his knife, meticulously inspecting the edge before flipping it around to start sharpening the other side. “Just look around you. The other novices? The people you’ve trained with? None of them are even going to think of dropping out just because the training’s tough as shit.”

“I’m not a math guy but statistically I’m pretty sure that’s impossible.”

“You’re not taking into account the human factor, that’s why. You know, the majority of the people who get picked up for this are orphans, or runaways, or people who just got dealt the—uh, how does the saying go again? Short end of the stick? Yeah, short end of the stick one too many times.”  

Henri paused. “You know Niki?”

Danny raised an eyebrow. “Who?”

“Week Five. Brown hair, short, has more faces than fingers, a really strong kick.”

It was the kick that unlocked the memory, strangely enough. After his first month of endurance training, Dusan came in with a woman—a recently graduated apprentice—and had her spar with the best person in their cohort: a guy named Amir. Danny didn’t know him very well—in fact he disliked the majority of the people in his cohort—but that didn’t stop him from audibly wincing when he witnessed Niki kick Amir’s back so hard she dislocated both of his shoulders. He was in the infirmary for weeks and got set back in months of training after, so Danny heard.

Seeing Danny’s expression, Henri laughed. “Yeah, that Niki. Before she came here, she used to be an addict. Got kicked onto the streets and spent a whole year doing whatever she could chasing her next high. Got into a fuck ton of trouble too. The League took her off the streets, cleaned her up, and gave her a new life. Last I heard, she’s posing as the date to some fancy Greek diplomat in Monaco.”

“How do you even know all this?”

“Maybe if you stopped being a kissass and actually made friends with the others, you’d know these things.”

Danny threw the rag he was using to wipe a knife at Henri’s head. “A kissass— well fuck you too.” Then, grumbling under his breath, “It’s not my fault that they don’t like me.”

“Yes, yes,” Henri placated, throwing the rag back. “Poor little Danyal, stuck being Mentor’s favorite.” He flicked his auburn hair. “Good thing I’m around to keep all the mean kids away.”

Danny rolled his eyes. “What ever would I do without you.”

“Starve, probably.” Henri cleaned off the knife. “But I digress. You see, out there—” he jerked his chin towards the open window, and beyond it the wide expanse of sand and shrubs and rock “ —we have nothing. A life in the slums, of being treated less than dirt. We are leeches. Vagrants. Eyesores. But here? Here, Ra’s al Ghul gives us food and clothes and a roof over our heads. Here he gives us purpose. A meaning to our lives.”

“Is that why you’re here?”

Henri’s smile was dark with contempt. “Paris may be the city of lights, but that only means it casts larger shadows.” 

The metal door that guarded the armory groaned open. A welcome interruption considering that Danny didn’t know how he was going to respond to Henri’s insight. 

Or…not.

“Oi!” Owens banged his fist twice on the side of the door before leaning up against it. His relaxed figure contrasted against the annoyance that scrunched his face. “Ugh, you guys aren’t even halfway done yet?”

Danny rolled his eyes. “We just started an hour ago.”

Owens—and no one really knew if that was his first name, last name, or even real name—was the youngest member of their cohort after Danny. He was a six-foot tall pillar of jackassery, and at sixteen, would probably grow even taller in time. His skin was tanned and covered with bursts of freckles over his face and arms from long, grueling hours in the sun. Owens always seemed to be sporting a scowl whenever Danny saw him. Or maybe Owens simply had that ‘recently sucked on a sour lemon face.’ Who could say?

He clicked his tongue, crossing the room to snatch the cloth Danny was using to wipe down the sword in his lap. “Shove off, loser.”

Danny held firm against Owens’ foot pushing him away. “Hey, what gives?”

“Mentor ordered for you to be ‘summoned to the east compound’ so I have to take over doing your shit,” he grumbled.

Henri narrowed his eyes, the knife in his hands taking on a dangerous glint. 

Owens just scoffed, raking a hand through his hair. “Don’t even try to start shit, Henri. Remember what happened to the last trainee that tried to murder someone without permission?”

Danny grimaced. The incident itself happened within a different cohort, but stories had a way of circulating. Rumor had it that one of the trainees tried to gain favor with their instructor by eliminating another member of their cohort. Drowned them on the beach and didn’t do a good enough job at hiding the body. The trainee was found out very quickly—there were eyes everywhere on the island after all—and summarily punished. Though exactly what the punishment was, no one except those in the cohort knew; the only thing known for certain was that no one would ever make the same mistake again.

Henri huffed, resuming his maintenance with a serene grace. “I have no idea what you’re implying.”

“As long as you keep to your side, I’ll keep mine.” Owens said. He shot Danny a glare. “What the hell are you still doing here?”

Danny stuck his tongue out at him. “Don’t have to be so rude about it, jeez.” He got up, said goodbye to Henri, and headed off to the east compound. 

The building was, thankfully, only a short walk from the armory. It was a giant, boxy building with dark-tinted windows, that sat near the edge of the jungle and bordered the sharp cliffs of the island. One of the Shadow-people—official members of the League—intercepted him at the door, leading him through a series of winding hallways until they arrived at a large room on the far-end of the building. 

The room wasn’t lavishly decorated by any means, but it lacked the foreboding utilitarianism of the rest of the island. Not homey or welcoming, but more…warm, somehow. Human. There were couches and chaise lounges, beautifully carved tables, bookshelves, potted plants, and dark green curtains. At the end of the room were glass doors that opened into a balcony that overlooked the sea.

And there, stood in the middle, with a smile that made his core hum, was her.

“Talia,” he breathed, as if the very name was sacred. His core fluttered, barely biting back the word it wished to call her. Too shy despite its eagerness. Mother , it whispered. Mother-mother-mother.

◆◆◆

The first time Talia parted with her son, mere moments after his birth,  it was more out of necessity than any true desire to do so. Her father needed the aid of the Batman against an old enemy. Her mother’s death needed to be avenged. Her beloved needed to be focused on the mission— not be burdened by the weakness of family.

The plan was easy enough to execute. The ambush at their desert HQ was the perfect setting to enact her great performance. Her beloved may be the world’s greatest detective, but Talia had been taught all the ways to craft a lie ever since she could learn to speak. A sudden fainting spell, a conspiratorial request to Dr. Weltman, and silent tears to soak her infirmary pillow were all she needed to fool him. 

Him and her father. 

(But the tears she shed that day were real— even if the reason for them was but a mirage.)

Talia hid her pregnancy for as long as she was able, and when she could no longer hide the swell of her stomach, she fled from the League’s grasp and burrowed herself a hole so deep that no one could possibly find her. She tracked down Dr. Weltman to help Talia give birth and swore her to secrecy. Saw only the downy tufts of dark hair on her infant son’s head, heard his shrieking cries, before bidding Dr. Weltman  to take her son and leave him some place where he could be safe.

Talia never inquired as to where Dr. Weltman took her son. The less she knew, the better for everyone once Talia eventually returned to the League; the prodigal daughter escorted back to be dealt her punishment. Ra’s al Ghul did not take lightly to betrayal, less so from his own kin.

When she conceived Damian, Ra’s made sure to keep a tighter surveillance on her movements.

“The League of Shadows require an heir,” he said, Lazarus green eyes cutting in their gaze. “You have already robbed us of one. This new child will remain here.”

It did not take long for her father to order that the little fetus inside her womb should instead be transferred to an artificial gestation tube. An unfaithful daughter such as her did not deserve to carry the precious heir to the League, after all.

Talia bore all this with grace and a fierce determination to regain her place in the League. All her efforts focused towards gaining the privilege to raise Damian herself.

Damian was such a cute child. A sweet and kind child who squealed in delight at the birds nesting at his window. Who was the balm to her soul. Whose first words were a gurgled mama. Whose aches and hurts she soothed with gentle touches and soft kisses to his black hair. Whose little hands she pressed a wooden training sword into as she taught him all the ways he could cut the life out of a foe.

Then one day Dusan came to the League with tales of a little boy with black hair and too-pale-blue eyes.

The ache in her heart returned with a vengeance.

Talia did not know why her father decided against recovering his lost grandson then and there. Perhaps he thought of Danyal as a lost cause— what potential he had chipped away by years of civilian life and mundane morality. Perhaps he had some grand and masterfully crafted plan for Danyal that required him to stay with the Fentons for as long as Ra’s deemed it fit. Perhaps Ra’s was simply curious. He was an old man, after all; old enough to have seen the patterns of history repeat themselves and know, almost instinctively, which people are destined to become instruments of Fate.

Talia never claimed to know the inner workings of her father’s mind.

When the time finally came that she could claim her eldest son as her own— could finally, finally hold him in her arms and say “yes you are my son” after years of trying to bury his existence in her heart—her elation was short-lived.

It would be Dusan who would train him. 

Dusan who would mold him.

Talia was ordered to sit on the sidelines and turn the other cheek.

And yet… Behold!

Here was her first born, in the flesh. Taller than she last saw him three months ago, and his hair cut shorter and away from his face. His arctic eyes brightened at the sight of her despite the shadows beneath. He stood straighter, broader; stance not necessarily confident but disciplined. He bore but a passing resemblance to that frail little boy in that room of ice.

He spoke. “Talia.” There was a slight quiver in his voice— a cross between elation and desperation—and all Talia could remember was the fasting cries of a baby she never let herself see.

“My son. My habibi.” She closed the distance between them, hands cupping his face. Her thumbs brushed against his cheekbones—could see the smatterings of freckles on his nose. There was a sharpness to his face now. A gauntness that was never there before. “How are you?”

Danyal’s eyes—his father's eyes—crinkled up in a smile. “I’m alright. More than that, now that I got to see you.” He blinked, head cocked to the side. “Why are you here?”

She smiled. “Officially, I am here to deliver you this.” Talia walked back to the table, taking out two opaque white pill bottles. She handed the one with a simple green label on the front to Danny. “After hearing of your condition, Ra’s al Ghul had his people work on a medicine that will, hopefully, supply your ghost half with its needs.”

Danyal twisted open the bottle and shook a few gel capsules onto his hand, the bright green a stark contrast against his skin. “It’s…from the Lazarus pit?”

Talia nodded. “Take these once a day. And these—” she hands him the other bottle with a red label “ —are to help control your cryokinesis whenever your mania has gone out of control. There will be some side effects with this one, so make sure you are somewhere safe if you ever need to use them.”

He clutches both bottles in his hands and lowers his head. “Thank you.”

“Anything for family.” Talia smiled. “Though I will say that while the medicine is the official reason I am here, unofficially I am here for something else.” She beckoned him to come closer. “Come, I want to introduce you to someone, though you must take care to be quiet.”

Talia took him by the hand and led Danyal into an adjoining room. “Do you remember when I told you that I had a son?” A soft four-poster bed sat in the middle, ladened with all manner of pillows, and nestled at its center was a small lump. 

“Come closer,” she whispered to him. Talia sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over the lump, brushing away soft strands of hair to reveal a soft, rounded face, eyes closed in sleep. “This, Danyal, is Damian. He is my youngest son.” 

She turned to look at him. Could see the realization blooming on his face, eyes wide at first in surprise, then understanding, then longing. His mouth was agape in a silent ‘oh.’ “He’s…”

“Yes, my son. This is your brother.”

◆◆◆

“My brother,” Danny whispered. 

Brother-brother-brother, his core echoed.

This small child cocooned in sleep was his little brother.

“I told him about you during our flight here and he was absolutely determined to greet you properly but…” Talia laughed softly, fingers brushing against Damian’s cheek. “However stubborn he may be, he is still seven and prone to exhaustion.”

Danny laughed, instantly enraptured. 

He looks like me, Danny thought. Though the skin was much darker—closer to Talia’s own—and the shape of the eyes a bit different, Damian almost looked like the childhood pictures his mom and dad would frame and decorate the house with. 

“What’s he like?”

“Proud,” Talia said. “He’s been raised as a prince, you see. Stubborn, of course, something he inherited from your father. Very intelligent and very determined and…kind. So very kind and gentle to animals.”

His chest fluttered with warmth. His core hummed. Brother-mine-mother-mine-family-here-us-together.

This-is-how-it-should-be.

Danny’s own eyes never left Damian’s face. “Can you tell me more about him?”

Talia smiled. And for the rest of the afternoon, her voice filled every corner of the chamber with warmth as she regaled Danny with anything and everything about the precious treasure that was Damian al Ghul. Danny listened with rapt attention, mind absorbing every little detail.

The voice in his head that sounded like Jazz spoke. Being a big brother is a lot of responsibility. Can you handle it?

Yes, his core sang. A conviction. A promise. A vow.

Brother-mine-mother-mine-family-mine.

Protect-protect-protect.

Here-us-belong.

◆◆◆

The physicality and discipline they gained during phase one of their training was refined in phase two. The martial skills they were taught were further expanded upon; an entire arsenal of techniques cultivated and developed into the most efficient way to take down any opponent was open to them. “The goal of a fight is to end it,” Dusan instructed. “To make sure your opponent cannot get up and strike you again.” 

Danny’s revitalized ghost half gave him advantage over the rest of his cohort, who were all older and bigger and stronger than he was. A bit of experimentation and he found that he could channel his ghostly energy into his human form to enhance his strikes, increase his speed, or boost his stamina. Though his early spars were mediocre at best, now he was a force to be reckoned with on the training mat.

Stealth was another subject. Dusan taught them the exact way to walk so as to minimize any footsteps. How to hide your tracks. The art of disguise. They were given obstacle courses and staged missions with the objective of getting in and out of a building without being seen or traced. Even without his invisibility or intangibility, Danny passed these tests with flying colors. 

They were taught weapons handling and herbology, first aid and navigation. Languages, too, were on their list. Mandarin and Spanish and Arabic and Hindi and Russian and more, their accents trained so that eventually they’ll be nigh indistinguishable from a native speaker’s. 

They were taught about the mission; the grand purpose of the League of Shadows. They were the great fangs that protected the head, the hands by which to do its bidding. The world was dying, said Ra’s al Ghul. The world had been rotting in a slow and agonizing death because people were too stubborn, too selfish to change their ways. And from the shadows, the League will preserve the world by cutting off the rot , like how a surgeon cuts out a tumor. 

“Rules and order alone will not right the world. Justice cannot be done without whilst staying clean,” Dusan lectured. “To survive in this world, to survive in the League of Shadows, you must have the conviction to dirty your own hands.”

Danny does not believe in the mission. Not wholeheartedly, anyway. What he does believe in is his grandfather’s generosity and his uncle’s solid stature, an ever present anchor against any storm. Believes in Damian’s bright curiosity and his compassion, in the bashful way he’d reach up to hold Danny’s hand in his. Believes in Talia’s healing touch and soft smiles, the warmth of her voice washing over him like a gentle tide. 

Danny believes in the vows written in the names he is called. Grandson. Nephew. Brother. Son. 

Family.

And for that, Danny was willing to do anything. Be anything.

  When Dusan gave him a poisoned cup, Danny drank without hesitation. 

Mithridatism: the practice of building immunity towards poisons made from large organic molecules through gradual administration of non-lethal amounts. In this area, Danny also had a greater advantage over his cohort. Further experimentation showed that his ghost-half naturally detoxifies Danny’s body of any inorganic poisons, metabolizing it into itself and using it as energy.

Ghosts feed off death much the same as how they feed off ectoplasm, though the former seemed to be a less effective energy source according to his parents’ research. Ra’s al Ghul—who personally came to observe how Danny’s two forms intermingled with one another—wanted to test if Danny could also feed off death. Long story short, the answer was Yes.

But only his own.

Not that Danny ever actually died while doing these experiments. Really the only thing that was needed of him is to imbibe enough poison to actually trigger the death aura manually and let Phantom do the work of healing him up. Phantom, you see, cannot let the human-Danny die because then there would be nothing to stabilize Phantom. Instead, Phantom converted whatever ectoplasmic or deathly energy he could get his hands on and pumped it through human-Danny’s system to speed up the recovery process. Danny’s wounds, in a way, were also the source of his extraordinary healing factor. 

Ra’s had theorized a method that would allow Phantom to keep the energy siphoned from the death aura as an extra source of power without harming human-Danny— but it was risky. Simple, but risky. A plan to be used only in the worst case scenario.

Blood Blossom training was the worst of the lot. Staying human was Danny’s only defense against that stupid flower, and even then just being close to the blossom’s sickly sweet scent made his stomach lurch in on itself and his head spin with nausea. But his family expected him to be able to bear it. To work through the repugnant feelings that made his skin prickle and his chest flare with pain and tolerate it. 

Mind over matter.

That’s all it was. 

Control the mind, control the body.

He would not be beaten by this. 

◆◆◆

“Is it just me, or has everyone been really out for me these days?” Danny wiped the sweat matting his forehead with a small towel. Settling the towel around his neck, he leaned his back against the cool concrete walls of the indoor sparring room.

He and Henri were taking a short break a ways away from the rest of the cohort. Some of the others were still sparring on the practice mats, repeating katas over and over to perfection. Dusan with a long wooden rod in hand circled the mat like a hawk, ready to strike at any sign of a mistake and correct with harsh precision. 

Henri poured a bit of his water bottle over his head, soaking his auburn hair. “You just noticed?”

“It’s not like I’ve been here long enough to.” His extra training covering the extent of his ghost powers usually meant that Danny was summoned to practice away from the rest of the cohort. On the bright side, he saw his family more often. Damian even came to a few of his training sessions to observe.

On the down side…well, as much as he didn’t like his cohort, it didn’t mean that he wanted to be an outcast. Mutual dislike was a given, this alienation on the other hand…

Focus. Their opinion of him didn’t matter in the long run. Besides, Danny was used to be an outcast. He never had many friends throughout his life except—

Except…

“Hey, hey!” Henri snapped his fingers in front of Danny’s face. “Earth to Danyal, are you reading me?”

Danny startled. Blinking the ghost of a memory away from his eyes, he smiled. “Copy that, Houston.” He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry ‘bout that.”

“No need to apologize to me, but you better hurry up.” Henri pointed to the imposing form of a League of Shadows member diligently standing at the entrance. They were masked, but Danny could tell from the angle of their head that the Shadow was looking expectantly at him. “It looks like I won’t be seeing you for a while.”

◆◆◆

Ra’s al Ghul carefully snapped the tome shut in his hand. “I have decided that it would be more beneficial for your education to remove you from your cohort.”

Danny’s mind stalled. “What?” 

Ra’s hummed. “You’ve improved in keeping your composure but you still leave yourself far too open. We must work on that.”

He’s frantic. Tongue tied and mouth dry as he tried to phrase the multitude of questions he had into the forced formal speech of the League. “I’m, uh— Sir, may I ask why I’m being removed?” Internally, Danny was flipping through all memories of his performance as a League apprentice. He didn’t see anything he could have done wrong; his marks were always high, Dusan had always praised his hard work, and Danny trained himself into the dirt from dusk till dawn. Why then? Why move him?

“Simple,” Ra’s said. “They are holding you back.”

Seeing the confusion plain on his face, Ra’s continued. “You are leagues ahead of your peers, Danyal. It would make no sense for you to have to stay at their level when you could instead reach farther. It’s also much more efficient, considering you have spent the majority of Phase Two of your training in private lessons.” He steepled his hands atop the heavy wooden desk. “Fear not, you are not completely removed from them. When the time comes, you will join them for the final test.”

The final test. The last hurdle before being welcomed as an official member of the League of Shadows. None of the recruits actually knew what the final test entailed; none of the inducted members would say anything about it, and the only sure piece of rumor they could get about the test from more advanced cohorts was that it had a very low pass rate. The League viewed its recruits as investments, and if they could not fulfill their potential, then they would be discarded.

Ra’s set his book aside and pulled out another one from a stack to his right. The book was small, only a bit bigger than Danny’s hand, with a faded purple cover bound shut by a long leather cord wrapped tightly around it. At Ra’s beckoning hand, Danny moved closer to the desk, hovering awkwardly over Ra’s.

“A recent acquisition,” Ra’s said, slowly unraveling the book with tender care. “It is difficult to find not only authentic, but reliable, books on the supernatural. To differentiate the experts from the charlatans. But these—” gingerly he flipped open the cover, carefully flattening the worn and yellowed pages “—were penned by a member of the foremost occult experts on ghosts. Their research into the infinite realms and its inhabitants have spanned centuries, and the exact depth of their knowledge is incalculable. They’re rather fond of their secrets.”

In thick, bold calligraphy—ink cracking at the edges—the title ‘ AN EXTENSIVE ACCOUNT ON THE NATURE OF GHOSTS AND THE MANIFESTATION OF THEIR PSYCHE’. Then, in neat curling script at the bottom was the signature of Elizabeth Showenhower.

Danny’s memory sparked at the name. “Showenhower?”

“You know of them?”

“I…had a run-in with a Showenhower—a criminal that liked to call himself Freakshow—when I was still in Amity. He ran a circus and had a staff that could mind control ghosts to perform acts and rob banks for him.”

“So they’re still around, then.” Ra’s flipped through the book, summarizing the rumored history of the Showenhower family to Danny. The family was a collector of cursed artifacts and scholars of the antiquated and esoteric, their interests laying solely in the territory of ghosts or ghost-adjacent things. Each member would collect and study and compile their knowledge into various caches of hidden libraries, passing the secrets they learned of the Infinite Realms onto the next generation of Shownehowers who would then repeat the cycle.

A Case Study on the Ghost of Miss Catherine and the Subject of Mania.

Danny wondered if his parents ever came across any books by the Showenhowers and consulted it. They would have poured over the text, reading it cover to cover and analyzing every scrap of information it had to offer. Did they even know about the Showenhowers? Wonder what they would think about all of the alchemy in their books. Some part of Danny believed that, as scientists, his parents would scoff at the idea of magic. But then again…his parents did build their entire career on proving the existence of and then studying a creature that many believed didn’t exist, so maybe they’d eat up the magic part, too.

“Ah, here we are.” Ra’s settled on a page and flipped the book over to Danny. “I feel that you will find this section quite interesting.”

Mania. The ice. The overwhelming cold. Perhaps this would finally give him the answers to Vlad’s cryptic words. God…that entire conversation—Vlad, Amity, ghosts— seemed like a lifetime ago.

It was great uncle Johnathan who first coined the term Mania to describe this phenomenon in ghosts. Mania, from the greek word μᾰνῐ́ᾱ , which is synonymous with the word ‘madness’ or an otherwise ‘mad desire.’ 

His eyes locked onto that word. Madness. Like…insanity?

The ghost of whom I had the pleasure of meeting goes by the name of Catherine. She is comparatively weak in power to the other ghosts recorded by the Showenhower family, a mere apparition with minor poltergeist tendencies that had, until recently, been haunting the young lady of an affluent family. They are not relatives, of that I have no doubt, but a thorough and in-depth research into the family in question’s history revealed that some years ago they had once employed the services of a young woman as a live-in nanny for their newly christened daughter. It was remarked that the two shared a very close relationship up until the nanny was unfortunately killed defending her charge in some sort of conflict.

The passage then went on to describe the afterlife of Catherine the ghost. A tragic tale of a woman who protected a girl she thought of as her own daughter and, even after death, continued to watch over her from afar until the girl’s untimely death via consumption. 

He traced the words with a building impatience,  slowly parsing the meaning of the passage. Some of the passage was written in a long, winded, and pedantic style. Reading it reminded Danny of that one assignment in 8th grade US History where they had to memorize and recite the Preamble of the Constitution. 

The case study of the ghost of Catherine Eckhart seemed to go on forever, but things did start to become interesting once Elizabeth Showenhower started to describe the effects young lady Helen’s death had on Catherine. She became inconsolable, yes, but at the same time frenzied. Her normally weak poltergeist abilities began to manifest stronger, somehow, more erratic as she began to attract objects toward herself. Curtains and bedsheets and wooden chairs and silverware would start to float and circle around her pale and lingering form, a swirling vortex of household objects that scared the occupants of the Edwards manor so much that they soon abandoned it. 

Ghosts, Elizabeth wrote in small curling script, are at the very heart of it a manifestation of a particular brand of psyche. They are the imprints of the dead that choose to linger beyond the veil. The central feature that formulates a ghost and anchors it onto the material plane is the primal human experience of want. Of desire. Think of it as a very singular sense of purpose. They have an uncontrollable need to pursue this desire—though whether if it is because of a belief that by fulfilling it their souls can finally seek peace, or if by continuously satiating that desire they are able to maintain their permanence in both the Infinite Realms and the material plane, we know not. It is the constant source of debate among the Showenhower family. I am of the belief that it is the latter.

Mania, then, as great uncle Joseph described it, was the consequences of failing to fulfill that desire. Or, perhaps in the case of Miss Catherine, it is the inability to fulfill that desire leading to the perceived failure of it. Her last act in life was one of sacrifice and an intense desire to protect the young lady Helen, and in death that feeling only persisted and manifested ten fold. What then was she to do now that her dearly beloved charge has passed? Had been taken away by a disease that neither doctor’s nor Catherine’s efforts could cure? 

Logically, one would realize the futility in blaming one’s self for such a death. It is not the fault of any party that lady Helen died so young. It is not the fault of any party except that of the diseased hands of Fate itself. But ghosts are not built on logic. They are pathos incarnate; they are the strongest emotions a person has in the moments before death takes hold that manifest itself into substance. 

Mania is, perhaps, the  most tragic form of self-preservation for ghosts. It works two fold: the first being either the amplification of the ghost’s current abilities (in the case of miss Catherine, the radius of her poltergeist abilities doubled and she was able to commandeer larger and heavier objects than before) or the manifestation of new abilities (great uncle Joseph wrote of a ghost that developed an ability to manipulate light to cast illusions) as a way of coping for the perceived failure. The second is the amplification of their own emotions to an almost mad and degenerative degree. 

To illustrate the second point— Before lady Helen’s death, Miss Catherine had been, foremost, a benign ghost. Her desire to protect Helen mostly appeared to be eliminating any slight inconveniences, such as helping Helen find lost objects, or warding off unwanted suitors. After Lady Helen’s death, Miss Catherine’s  benign nature changed to one of hostility. Her ghostly aura threatened to choke any of the servants that attempted to remove the late lady Helen’s belongings from her chambers. The incidents increased to the near impalement of one of the servants that I was forced to intercede and exercise Catherine from the chamber with blood blossoms. Catherine, then, took to zealously guarding Lady Helen’s grave.

I am reminded of the words of my namesake, my thrice great-grandmother Elizabeth Showenhower. “Ghosts have only a singular desire in their whole existence to which they must devote the altar of themselves to, but it is an unfortunate truth that they cannot choose as to what that desire may be.”

It was the desire to see lady Helen safe that tied Miss Catherine to this world, and now that the lady is gone, Miss Catherine’s soul seeks a new anchor.

There was more to Elizabeth’s writings, but Danny left it off there, confident that he got all the information he needed, but still in the process of deciphering what it meant. 

The idea of ghosts having a singular desire was not an entirely new concept to Danny. It was a theory his parents had discussed a few times over dinner, though the terminology they used was different. Obsessions, they called them. Danny didn’t really think much on it until he started fighting ghosts himself, and even then he didn’t really care much about the validity of the theory. Though considering how gimmicky the Amity Park ghosts sometimes got, maybe there was some truth to this whole ‘singular obsession’ thing.

If so, then what was his?

“Why did you show me this, sir?” 

Ra’s scrutinized him with that unreadable smile. “I thought you would appreciate learning more about the workings of your other half, even if it is through an occult lens.” He took the book and slid it towards himself, carefully shutting it. “When you first came to us, you said that you were afflicted with mania and yet could not tell us what that meant. Now, we know.”

That familiar and biting cold began to creep into Danny’s chest. “That I failed,” he said. A statement. An undeniable fact. 

“Yes.” The bluntness of Ra’s words hurt more than Danny would like to admit. “You did. Your cryokinesis developed in response to your mania, but instead of making you stronger, it only hampers you. I believe this is because you lack an anchor. If we can figure out your obsession, then we can quickly find the appropriate anchor and better help you get your powers under control. So the key question remains: what did you fail at? Tell me, Danyal, do you know the core of your own desire?”

No, said his mind.

(Yes, sang his core. Yes-yes-yes-we-know).

Did he?  

He clutched at the fabric of his shirt above his heart. His core thrummed just beneath the skin. “I think I do…but at the same time I don’t? It’s not— it’s difficult for me to put into words because at one moment it's one thing and the next it's another.”

Danny thinks about that nightmare from so long ago. Of Sam and a raft of burned and water-logged corpses asking why, why didn’t you save us? He thinks of Damian, both arrogant and so eager to please, his boundless curiosity, and quiet gentleness. He thinks of Talia’s fingers combing through his hair, of her warm embrace, of her enduring love. 

“I don’t know what exactly my obsession is. All I know is, at the very end of the day, what I want is to get stronger. Not for revenge, not as some kind of weird penance. I want to be stronger so that I can protect them—Mother, Damian, you and Dusan. I just want to keep my family safe, because you took me in when I had no one else to turn to.”

Ra’s stared at him with his all-knowing eyes, surprise alighting for a moment across his face before it settled into a smile. Something almost fond. “Well, I believe we found your anchor without even having to try.”

(Here, his core sang. Here-family-stay. Here-us-belong.) 

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

CAP CHAPTER 74 ROCKED

AND I WROTE THINGS HERE YA GO

SPOILERS BELOW!!!

Yknow i had to do it to em (play eye of the tiger based off of the chapter title, i think I’ll play gonna fly too, training montage music) 

EXCELLENT START. 

Love the dialogue already, Rena I love you dearly. 

I know you made the massive time skip because of your break from Panthera while writing, But i do actually quite like how it means they’ve been at this for almost a full year by now

Insane for this. “Yes and no, that was Ladybug’s training” 

The fuck will she do to them. I am so ready to find out

SHE’S SO INTENSE I LOVE HER LOVE THIS SIDE OF HER

I hope LB doesn’t interfere too much, I want to see how everyone deals with this side of Panthera

It’s hard to be fast at falling- hHA i am actually wheezing, i love this

Help this is awesome

I’m terrible at commenting on action, but this flows really smoothly and I’m loving how Panthera is explaining shit to them while they are flailing 

I feel like LB will be pulled in to make a point about team work

How is she wearing a hat with the cat ears

Awww Anarka tips cute

I love this

I enjoy Panthera beating hte three of their asses

I’m really waiting for the moment the tension between LB and Panthera explodes, because the push and pull between them can’t keep up like this! Especially because you have hinted at the Akuma becoming more dangerous 

Thats an argument / conversation I can’t wait to read.

Well i can wait, I would rather things are appropriately set up and you were happy with writing them Cap. does that make sense?

Help not Chloe hating Nadia, tbh she gives me bad vibes considering how ready she was to use children to boost her own show rating. 

Also, stealing a reporters microphone is such a funny idea.

JULEKA YOU THICK HEADED IDIOT NOTICE WHO RENA IS PELASE I BEG OF THEE

I still find it funny that Juleka is so bothered by not knowing who rena is. 

I love the alya appreciation, she’s a really really fun character especially in this, Chloe buying her an expensive camera is so funny though

Help- 

“They only ask me why I’m a boy on an all girl’s team and if I’m dating you guys.” Carapace huffed, tugging at his hood. “I’m also bi but I’m thinking of aiming for dating a dude next time I’m looking to date just so I can spite them.”

I’M OBSSESSED WITH NINO HERE HELP

Mainly because i was just thinking that “huh, i forgot that without Adrien as Cn team miraculous really seems like a girls thing

OOOO 

“They’re not my rules” 

Juleka saying this to them really forces them all to see that the partnership is unbalanced

This is like the different expectations of my divorced parents this sounds stressful to be in a team with 

Interesting to see Juleka’s rules though

I like this team conversation, I’m very curious about how much we’ll see with the five of them

The talk about dreams is fun, I am curious about what Chloe will end up wanating to do 

The whole “Oh was that an implication thing?” was cute

Juleka thinking the fact that we all end up dying is a reassuring thing is so funny help

leaving the three to a long moment without their two leaders. Or.. was it leader and her second in command.

THAT SHWTA I’M TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!! POWB YEAH UNBALANCED SYSTEM AND SHE NOTICED WOOO

It is very interesting that they never thought of it like that before though, I’m pretty sure the media had implied that Juleka was second in command, or that might have been Juleka bias working 

Cap you have no idea how insane i am for the inevitable LB and Panthera disagreement on how to run things, like I feel like there will have to be a big push because Juleka is unlikely to challenge it without them even though she feels really strongly for it

But Alya’s observation has just made me more interested

I do need it to be known that I’m not trying to vilify Marinette! I love her character in this! She’s so interesting with how she sees things and how dedicated she is, and she is a good hero!

I’m just.. Really interested to see what happens when Panthera and her are actively opposing each other

The fact that Panthera fights like she’s dancing has me feeling wild 

And actually helps me visualise how she fights a lot more, not that it was hard before but this makes a lot of details click

YAY THEY BEAT HER!!!

Ooo, Fu talk. And. wait. PROGRESS ON THE PERMANENT HEROS THING WOOHOO

We all know LB has just not asked Fu about it at all

I’ve never really stopped to wonder why

I think I assumed it was because she didn’t want to maybe go against Fu, but I don’t think that really fits…

Huh. 

More to think about, though I do apologise if you’ve made that particular motivation clear and I’ve accidentally blanked it!

Oh shit

Never mind

Were talking about the metalica moment that’s crazy insane

Never mind fade to black

God I am so curious about what she’ll be able to do with that when it is more controlled

Hang on wasn’t she not transformed? Oh no, nvm plagg can leave the ring now

the end was so cute- help not Chloe buying expensive shit for people, love that for her

I seem to have said less than usual! i'm a bit frantic rn, so sorry about that! I'm not sure how much either of my asks made sense, they really are just stream of conscious so I do apologise for anything that is confusing!

Im glad you liked the time skip- Ive heard some comments expressing their unhappiness or discomfort with it so,, yeah;;

I can't wait for panthera and ladybug's dynamic in season 3. if you guys love ladynoire toxic yuri oh boy season 3+4 will be the seasons for you guys <3