#The poor villagers just get used to both of their shit

[gaiussleechtank]

In some random modern Arthur returns au, Merlin would be living in this small little everyone knows everyone village. And magic or not sorta world, everyone knows that Merlin is much older than he looks, that's he's lived there for a very long time and just keeps to himself most of the time.

Then Arthur comes crawling out of the lake and joins Merlin in the village, living at his sweet wee cottage.

And the little everyone knows everyone community goes mental that this new and random guy just starts living with the town cryptid.

One day, both Merlin and Arthur are at the town's only cafe/restaurant/ literal hole in the wall, and someone finally works up the courage to ask how the two met.

Arthur, still getting used to the modern world and trying to be very polite to the villagers: we knew each other when we were younger

Merlin who no longer gives two shits: yeah, and then I found him at the lakeside bleeding out from a stab wound after he had escaped a crazy cult

The poor person who now regrets asking: oh... That's nice?

[satorusugurugurl]

If this request makes you uncomfortable or isn’t something you want to write, I apologize and please ignore my request!

Heyy! I was wondering if I could request a satoru x reader x Suguru smut? With like, some bdsm mixed in yk. Tying reader up, satoru is a tease, and likes to make her squirm and ask questions he know she can’t answer because Suguru is fucking her throat. But Suguru is mean. Mean and tougher than satoru. He tells satoru to stop being so gentle with you, that not only do you deserve rough treatment but you like it. And satoru listens to him, of course. I just want them to run through me like a train😞

Also same mean geto anon (again lol) I’m gonna just sign off w an emoji now :3 -🍭

Hi Anon!

This isn't my cup of tea, it's my FUCKING jam!!

Summary: Gojo and Geto had been on a two-week-long mission, which hadn't gone as smoothly as Suguru wanted. He was pent-up and frustrated. So, of course, Gojo called you to warn you it might not be a good idea to come over. You, of course, did not heed his warning. The second you get home, you realize that you were screwed.

Word Count: 3,706

Warnings: BDSM, rough sex, oral sex, so much sex, degradation, teasing, the smuttiest of smut

A/N: Good God, Satoru x Reader x Suguru is my weakness!! I put my whole heart into this. Geto Suguru, teacher AU, is my kryptonite!

Part Two

She Likes it Like That

“Y/N babe,” Gojo said in a hushed whisper, “you probably shouldn't come home tonight.”

You cocked an eyebrow, looking away from the first year's training. “I'm sorry, did you just tell me not to come home. . .to our apartment?” The world ‘our’ came out like acid.

Gojo sighed overdramatically. “Don't say it like that. I'm trying to save you! Suguru is in such a bad mood.” You listened to him walking around. “I sighed out loud when I noticed the last of my mochi was gone. Fuck you for that, by the way, and do you know what he said to me?” You pinched at the bridge of your nose, waiting for the rant to continue. “He told me to shut the fuck up! For sighing!”

“What did you do to piss him off? Oh, and just an FYI, I bought you more mochi, asshole.”

“Oh—” silence, “thank you-I’m sorry, please don't return it.”

“Satoru! Forget about the mochi. What happened to Sugu?”

The mission your partners were sent on did not go as planned. Their hotel had flooded; it was not like they had time to consider sleeping. The higher-ups sent them to an abandoned mountainside village full of cursed spirits. Poor Suguru had to swallow dozens for nearly two weeks. Gojo had enough; he couldn't stand the pained expression on his face as he gagged the last spirit down. So he decided to Hollow-Purpled the entire village.

The second they got back, the higher-ups scolded the hell out of them. Chastising them, complaining that they didn't do a good enough job. After all their hard work, the time they spent away from home, from you. Those bastards dared to complain about their hard work. It sent Suguru into a terrible mood, one that was bound to end with either a fight or someone getting fucked into the mattress.

One thing about Suguru was that when he was pissy, things felt out of his control. He needed to take control back. Which meant he wanted to have sex. He would be rough, really rough, tying either you or Satoru up, not letting you go until he had calmed down. Or if one of you was fucked too stupid to continue, his eyes focused on the other that wasn't tied up.

“So please, just stay with Ieiri tonight. I'm going to lock myself in my room. Last time he was this pissed off, the both of us were so sore we couldn't move.”

“Ugh, fuckin’ whatever.” This whole situation wasn't fair. You hated how your boyfriends were mistreated.

“Yeah, just stay the—oh, hi Suguru.” There was a shuffling in the background. “No, I wasn't talking shit.” Satoru nervously laughed. “Look, Sugu—no, put down the rope—”

“Toru?” Panic for your boyfriend sank into your stomach.

“Hey! Wait a second—Sugu—”

Before any other indication of what was happening came through the receiver, the other line cut off. So you quickly yelled to the students you had to leave and took off. By the time you made it, you were breathless from running and realized that in your panic, you left your keys at work.

You picked up the spare key hidden under the doormat. Just as you were about to unlock the door, it flew open. You slowly blinked, looking up at a very irritated Suguru. The man radiated gloom and tension. He was in his sweatpants, and his hair was tied in a messy bun, and, dear God, he looked pent up.

“Why the fuck are you using the spare key?”

“I-I uh—”

“Ooooh~ there she is~!” a hand gently rested against Suguru’s shoulder as Satoru peered down at you from behind your dark-haired boyfriend. “There's our girl!”

It only took a moment to see that Satoru mirrored Suguru’s frustration and anger. Oh fuck. The key fell from your hand as you took a step back. Suguru was demanding and rough when he was pent up. Satoru, on the other hand, was a tease. He liked pushing you, making you cry. Both of them being in a pissy mood simultaneously, this was a nightmare for you.

“Y-You, I thought you were in trouble!”

“Oh yeah, no.” Suguru’s soured face slowly twisted into a smirk as Satoru licked his lip. “But you~?” Suguru’s hand darted out, grabbing you by the front of your shirt, preventing you from moving further back. “You're royally fucked.” Before you even had a chance to respond, Suguru and Satoru grabbed you, yanking you inside.

“Awe~” Satoru hummed as he trailed his kiss up the bare thighs he lay between. “Look at you~ trying to clamp your thighs shut.” Gojo’s fingers were buried deep inside of you. Finger fucking you to the edge of yet another orgasm he would deny. “But you can't, can you~? Suguru’s got you all tied to the bed, spread out for us to use you.” A muffled moan escaped you. “Huh? What was that princess? You gotta use your big girl words.” Satoru tilted his head, cupping his free hand around the back of his ear. “Oooh! That's right, you can't talk when getting your throat fucked.”

You gagged as Suguru's cock hit the back of your throat. He was quiet, his eyes shut in concentration. He looked so fucking hot, so focused on the feeling of your mouth. Sweat was beading on his forehead as he pulled in and out of your mouth, grunting softly as you hollowed your cheeks. But the more Satoru spoke, the more Suguru knitted his eyebrows.

“I bet you want me to stuff your pussy, too, don't you~? You want to be spit-roasted between your two boyfriends?” Your pussy twitched at his words. “Oooh~!! Your cunt just twitched. Is that what our sweet girl wants—”

“Satoru,” Suguru snarled, “shut the fuck up.”

“Well, excuse the fuck out of me. Y/N likes it when I tease her.”

Suguru tsked, pulling his thick cock out of your mouth. You gasped and coughed, spit and precum coating your chin. Between your pants and the gasps for air, Suguru went to what you thought would be a head pat. Instead, his fingers tangled in your air with a hard yank, pulling you up to look down at Satoru. His face was flushed, cerulean eyes wide as he looked between his two partners.

“Look at the fucking slutty face she's making.” The grip on your hair tightened. “You think she looks like this because of your pitiful teasing?” A shaky moan escaped you as he tightened his grip harder. “No, she looks like this because this little slut likes it rough.”

Fuck, you wanted more, to run your hands over Suguru’s arms, to grip his cock, urging him to keep fucking your throat. You were desperate to trap Satoru's head firmly between your thighs, forcing him to kiss and lick your clit. Instead, you weakly tugged at the purple restraints tied to both your wrists and ankles. Suguru had set up the rigging underneath the mattress, making it impossible for you to move. Meaning if you wanted his cock back in your mouth or Satoru’s tongue inside of you, you had to wait for them.

What made it more frustrating was the fact that you were completely bare. Not allowing you to hide the way your body reacted to Suguru’s dirty words. He was telling the truth. And the truth was behind your body's reactions. Gojo could see it in the way your tight entrance clenched around his fingers. He could feel your pussy drip around him, your wetness running down his knuckles. Suguru was right; you did like it; no, like wasn't the right word.

You fucking loved it.

Suguru could see the wheels turning in Satoru’s head as his eyes glittered with lust and excitement. “Satoru~ do you finally see it?~” The way Suguru purred his name had Satoru’s cock throbbing. “You see why she came home, even though she knew she’d get fucked?”

“Yeah, yeah, she's a fucking slut.”

“Yeah, she is.” A sharp tug on your head made you yelp. Suguru grinned, cocking an eyebrow at you. “You want it rough? Want me to fuck your throat so hard you cry, pretty girl?”

“Y-Yes, please.”

Gripping his cock at the base, Suguru slapped his thick meat against your cheek. “That's a good girl. Now open up.” slowly, you opened your mouth to him. Watching your tongue slip out had his tip angry, throbbing red. “Now,” he smeared the beading precum over your bottom lip, “say ah~.”

“Ahh~” The second that sound left your pretty mouth Suguru shoved his cock in your mouth. Your eyes stung as tears filled your eyes.

Satoru’s fingers had stopped their slow movements inside of you. His mouth was dry as he gulped. Suguru had been rough before, but this was a whole new level. His thick fingers wrapped around your Y/H/C hair, holding your head in place. His hips pull back before slamming forward, his ass clenching with the force of each thrust. Blue eyes slowly trailed over to your face. Your eyes were red, big tears slowly down your cheeks, and your throat was fucked. Satoru swore he could see Suguru’s tip bulging in your slender neck.

This was fucking hot. Suguru’s bare back glittered in the low light of the bedroom, a sheen of sweat beaded over his toned muscles. It was like watching a god fuck a mortal Suguru radiated a dominating power as he watched their girlfriend choke and gag on his cock. Satoru’s cock was so hard it fucking hurt. Reaching down, he wrapped his hand around his throbbing shaft, jerking it slowly as he leaned down, kissing and nipping at your inner thighs.

The gentle kisses had you sighing contently around Suguru’s cock. Looking over his shoulder, Suguru sighed as he watched Satoru. His pink tongue was stuck out, gently teasing your damp folds. The sensation had you sighing around his dick, and that was not what he needed right this fucking second. Suguru wanted more; he needed it to relieve the tension in his shoulder. But that relief, the release he needed, wouldn’t happen, with Satoru teasing you like he loved to do.

“Satoru,” Suguru's voice was rough, “I just told you Y/N likes it rough.”

“Uh-huh~” Satoru’s voice was muffled as his face buried in your pussy, making you whine around the cock buried in your mouth.

“You’re not being rough enough.” Satoru pulled back, making you whine in protest. “Oh, I’m sorry. Do you want to come down here and eat Y/N’s pussy while I get my dick sucked?”

“No.” The cocky smile that was beginning to form on Satoru’s face was suddenly gone as Suguru reached his free hand down, wrapping his fingers in soft white hair. “I want you to fucking eat her cunt out like you fucking hate her.” Your eyes rolled back as Satoru was slammed back down into your pussy. The moan that left his mouth vibrated just right against our clit, making you cry out. “Ah~ fuck yes.” Your cries vibrated around Suguru’s cock, just the way he wanted. “That’s it, Satoru, keep it up.”

“Mmmmph.” Finally, having a picture of how Suguru wanted him to act, Satoru found himself motivated. Again, it might be because his boyfriend was tugging and pulling at his sensitive hairline. Yeah, that was motivating him. Fuck you like he hated you, he could do that. He was just as pent-up as Suguru was.

Fingers slammed inside your pussy, fucking in and out of your tight hole with a force and speed that had you crying out in pleasure. Your moans felt so fucking good, and the more you opened your mouth to cry, the deeper Suguru fucked your throat. He hit the back over and over again, his hand pressing firmly against Satoru’s head, pushing him harder against your clit. The two of you moaned while your mouths were being used; the sounds of whimpers, squelches, and gagging were like a symphony to Suguru’s ears.

Out of all the ways for him to relieve his stress, this was by far his favorite.

“Hah—fuck keep that up, Satoru, bring her right to the edge, then stop. I want her cumming with both of us inside of her. Fucking her so rough she has to call out of work tomorrow and Friday.” The thought of that had you pulling on your restraints. “Oooh oh, you like that? You like knowing the two of us will make sure you can’t walk or talk tomorrow?” Your muffled moans were quickly molded into gags as Suguru roughly fucked your face. “Yeah, you fucking do, you nasty little slut.”

Your mind was spinning as you felt yourself climbing closer and closer to your orgasm. The room was so hot and reeked of sex. It was all you could do not to allow yourself to cum right then and there. Satoru could feel it, the way your little swollen clit throbbed against his tongue, how your walls clamped down on his fingers. He wanted to send you over the edge. He was close to following you as he fucked his hips helplessly into the mattress, wishing it was your wet pussy instead.

One orgasm wouldn’t hurt, would it? You had been so good to them, allowing the duo to drag you into the house, strip you in the entryway, and tie you to the bed. Plus, on top of all that, they had left you alone for two weeks. You had to rely on that stupid vibrator Suguru insisted on allowing you to keep. That stupid toy was nothing compared to his tongue. Which was probably why he was bringing you to a mind-blowing orgasm in under three minutes.

Yeah, he was going to let you cum.

Curling his fingers up into your g-spot, Satoru fucked you as fast as his wrist would allow. Suguru instantly knew what was happening. From the way your eyes shut to how loud you were moaning around him, you were seconds away from cumming. If he was in a better mood, he might have allowed it to happen. Unfortunately, he wasn’t done with you yet.

“Stop.” Suguru scolded, pulling Satoru away from your dripping sex.

Both you and Satoru made disapproving groans as your orgasm slowly faded out of sight. “Doesn’t she deserve a treat? She’s been so good!” Satoru whined, licking your juices off his lips.

“I agree. Y/N does deserve a reward. But you need to give it to her in the roughest way that you can.” Suguru pulled his cock out of your mouth, allowing you to catch your breath. “Look at it this way. We get to blow off the steam while we make up for making her play with herself for two weeks.”

“Huh?” Those words struck a different chord in Satoru, and his cock twitched.

“Y/N, sweetheart, how often would you say you played with yourself when we were gone.”

You swallowed at the air greedily. “I don’t know, seven, maybe eight times.” Both your boyfriends shuddered, hearing the hoarseness of your voice.

“And out of all of those times, did you cum as hard as you do with us.”

“Not at all. They were all baby orgasms.”

Suguru shut his eyes, nodding his head. “See, Satoru, not only does our little slut like us rough and demanding, but we have to make up for those eight little orgasms.” When the dark-haired man looked back at Satoru, he saw a flash of white before your scream of shock and please bounced off the walls.

Suguru’s eyes were slightly wide as his brain tried to catch up with what his eyes had just witnessed. What he saw was Satoru balls deep inside of you. His thrusts were sloppy and needy, and fuck you looked as stunned as Suguru. One second you had been empty, pussy craving a cock deep inside of it from the denied orgasm. In the blink of an eye, Satoru was fucking into you more brutal than he’d ever fucked you before.

“I fucking told you, that toy was nothing compared to us.” Satoru snarled against the crook of your neck, digging his teeth into the sensitive skin. “Fucking stupid toy, not pleasing my girl.”

“Oh my—fuck, holy fuck!” You cried out, mouth wide open. Giving Suguru the perfect opportunity to get back to fucking your throat. The bittersweet taste of pre-cum had your mouth watering. He returned to the brutal pace he was in several minutes again.

“She needs that Satoru. What if we get sent on another long mission? She’s just supposed to suffer?” The thought of that had Suguru tilting his head, bangs falling in front of his eye. “You know what, I think you might be on to something. If we take her toy away, then we’d have to fuck her even harder the next time we get home.”

Satoru’s teeth sank harder into your neck as the tip of his cock slammed almost too hard into your cervix, making you scream around Suguru. “Exactly. Let me use reversal red on it, Y/N, please, baby.” You started to shake your head in a desperate plea to let you keep it. But Suguru’s cock in your throat made it impossible to do so. “What was that? Oh, right, you have your mouth full.” His lips moved against your pulse as his fingers dug into your hips. “Guess we’ll just have to say the way your clamping down on my cock is a yes in our book.” Your eyes darted up to Suguru, who had bought you the toy, for help.

“Mhmm fuck, yeah, I’m pretty sure she just hummed an ‘uh-huh’ around my cock.”

You wanted to argue, to fight against this rash decision, but you felt so good it was almost impossible to care. You were screaming around Suguru’s cock. Tears streaming down your face, leaving behind trails of mascara. They were both being so mean and rough. God, it was so fucking good. Who cared about a clit sucker when your throat and pussy were being fucked into next week.

“She’s close.” Satoru cried out, his balls slapping against your ass. “Oh fuck she’s hugging my cock so tight I’m going to explode Suguru.”

With blurry eyes, you glanced up at Suguru. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes shut tight. “I know, oh fuck I know, I’m so close, Satoru, don’t fuckin’ stop, make her cum, make her cum so hard.” Both his hands grabbed your face fucking your throat roughly as Satoru cried out, his hand pressing roughly on your clit, rubbing it in fast circles.

That was all that you needed. You cried out, squirting all over Satoru’s crotch, abdomen, and the mattress. Your orgasm set a domino effect between your boyfriends. Suguru followed behind you, his body hunched over you, his hands gently squeezing your head as he filled your mouth full of his thick cum. You weakly tried swallowing all of it, but that was somewhat difficult as Satoru extended your orgasm.

His thumb continues to rub your clit until his face scrunch up, mouth open in a feral growl. Satoru's orgasm hit him like a punch in the gut. He fucked all three of you harder, closer to oblivion. The headboard slamming against the wall as the restraint dug into your wrists was the only thing grounding you to remain on Earth. Satoru didn’t let up on the rough thrusts until he felt his cum dripping around his cock onto the bed.

The throbbing pain in the back of your throat, deep inside of your pussy was all the confirmation you needed that your boyfriends had fulfilled their promise. Never in your life had you been fucked so roughly. But it was a pain that you warmly welcomed.

After coming down, Suguru was the first to move gently. The rough hands that had been holding you in a vice gently held you as he pulled his softening cock out of your mouth. “Lay down.” His gruff, gentle voice whispered as he helped rest you against a pillow.

“Oh fuck—“ Satoru lifted his head off your shoulder, “I haven’t cum that hard in a while.” He was so slow, pulling out of you, grimacing as you cried out. “Sorry, fuck I’m sorry, baby.”

You shut your eyes, listening to Satoru getting out of bed. You could hear water running in the bathroom as gentle fingers began undoing your restraints. “You did such a good job, Y/N,” Suguru whispered. “Such a good girl for us.” His praise had you humming happily as he made quick work of the rest of the ropes.

“Suguru, let’s order in, yeah?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

The next half hour was a blur of warm happiness. Satoru helped wash your body in a bubble bath before Suguru joined you, kneeling next to the tub, lovingly stroking your face and hair. After you were cleaned up, your hair brushed, and pajamas on. You crawled into your bed with fresh sheets and relaxed. Satoru and Suguru fluffed your pillows and brought you a cup of tea for your raw throat. When your dinner arrived, the three of you sat in bed together to eat as a B-grade horror movie played on the television.

After eating, Satoru left to throw out the take-out containers. “Mmm, thank you for letting us do all that,” Suguru said as he crawled into bed after his shower. “That mission, it was rough.”

“I’m always happy to help.” Your voice cracked, making Suguru frown. “Stop frowning,” you flicked his forehead. “I like it rough.”

The bed dipped, and Satoru wrapped his arms around your waist. “Y/N can handle it. She is dating the two strongest, after all.” Both you and Suguru scoffed, relaxing in the growing silence. “Oh, by the way, Y/N.”

“Yeah?” You yawned, snuggling into Suguru’s chest as he turned the bedside lamp off.

“Did you bring home my mochi?”

In the dark of the room, you heard a thump and Satoru’s whine before Suguru pulled the three of you closer to him. “Satoru shut the fuck up about the mochi.”

[crispy-armpit]

✧ 𝖒𝖞 𝖕𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖑 ✧

ʏᴀɴᴅᴇʀᴇ ꜱᴇᴀ ɢᴏᴅ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

𓇼˚₊‧꒰ა 🫧 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚𓇼

⭒ 𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺: 10 dollars on a dare leads you to break one superstition that changes your life forever. you begin to learn secrets tied to your family and upbringing, at the cost of your freedom. who is this mysterious Anshumat, and why does he want you?

⭒ 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵: 𝘨𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘪𝘯𝘫𝘶𝘳𝘺, violence, implied stalking, kidnapping, choking, reader gets called a bride once

⭒ 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 1,418

⭒ a/n: yan sea god was inspired by an Indonesian myth called Nyi Roro Kidul! it's a really interesting legend if you want to learn more abt it ^^ also.... man tits...... meow..

will you venture down this path?

growing up, you would stay over at your grandmother's house every summer. her beautiful seaside cottage made the perfect accommodation for a family getaway. throughout your childhood, the superstitious old woman restricted you from doing specific things. rules like never whistling at night, don't open an umbrella indoors, etc.

you'd eventually found out that these were just scare tactics for children to make them listen. but there was one rule that your grandmother seemed to fear the most, a rule that never made sense... never wear white to the local beach. and when questioning her about the rule, she'd tell you the same story every time.

"long ago...

a cruel serpent god who once ruled these waters would rise from the ocean and into the islands, devouring innocent villagers and destroying temples along its path.

the gods and humans were furious at its actions. fed up with the destruction and death, they prepared a plan to thwart the serpent; a binding curse.

the serpent was cursed to spend its days rotting in a hidden island, where it was accompanied by its servants. it was also tasked with granting blessings to sailors passing through the rocky tides, where it weighed the sins of each individual to seal their fates.

but over the decades... the serpent grew bored and lonely. through a loophole, the serpent found a way to abduct humans. you see.. the serpent loves the colour white and pearls. so much so, it would use its voice, so alluring, to lure the poor victims who happened to wear such things. and once in the water, the serpent would drag the human to its temple where they would become its slave.. or worse...

its spouse."

here you are today, telling the same tale in front of your young niece and nephew. "well, that's one way to get bitches." your nephew, Keona laughs. a scoffing Kehlani adds on, "nah, who would want to marry an overgrown slimy snake?"

"hey now, take that shit to grandma. she just assigned me to be your storyteller," you shrugged. "and this story has a real reasoning behind it, ok?"

"what? sexy sea snake destroying villages?"

"no, it's so that little rascals like you..." you drill both your index fingers onto their foreheads, "are easier to find if you ever get lost at sea."

how did i end up here...

facepalming yourself, you sigh. you were disappointed in yourself. how'd you let those little punks reel you in a dare? where was the self-respect? the dignity? seriously, breaking your grandmother's number 1 rule for what? 10 dollars?

you walk along the shore while wearing a flowy white shirt and neck encased in one of your mother's pearl necklaces. the dare was simple: successfully walk down the shoreline without chickening out and boom— an extra 10 dollars into your wallet.

you'd prove to the twins that you weren't scared of a little bedtime story. buuut just in case you did happen to go missing (for reasons that are totally not hungry sea serpent related), you brought essentials in a bag, left a letter for your family, and are currently being watched by the twins.

laughing at yourself for the paranoia, you nearly reach the edge of the walk until you hear a feminine wail from between the hidden rocks. is someone hurt? the sound was coming from beyond your finishing point so it wouldn't hurt to check, right?

signalling the twins to come over, you bend down to their heights, "listen, it sounds like someone's in trouble past those rocks. so I want you both to go grab the first aid kit and call Officer Holden over, 'kay?" they nod and scamper off into town.

approaching the rocks, you peek in to find a naked... mermaid?! observing her, you notice the torn skin on her iridescent tail and warily walk over to her. "uh... hey? hola? salve? hallo? i'm ah— good human! no... nooooo bad.."

you notice the air seems to smell... sweeter?

the woman looks up at you from the sand with pleading eyes, "please— please help me! my name is Coralie, my master, he—"

"woah, it's ok! you're safe, help is coming. uh, your master? did he do this to you? are you an underwater criminal?!"

a distant melodious voice interrupts you. Coralie's previously pained face now warps into a sinister grin as her wound disappears. she crawls towards you as your vision fogs up and your knees buckle to the soft sand. the song lulls you into a deep sleep, your body now being pulled into the shallow waters.

you awake to the bright rays of sunshine and lungs filling in with fresh air. but the next in your line of sight knocked all the air out of your body again.

the luminous, barely-clothed body of an unknown man sat above you. his 9'7 self relaxed on the marble throne, with 2 pairs of eyes fixated on you. what the fuck is that?

you gawk at him, "holy mother of god..."

i'm not dreaming, am i?

his gaze shifts into amusement, "wrong. we gods do not have mothers. we were created."

"you're a... a god?"

"is it not obvious enough from my appearance? would you like to see another version of me?" the towering deity begins to warp into a feminine body as if it was melting and moulding itself. "is this preferable?" her new voice is flirtatious, genuinely curious.

then, she tries to warp into a third body. the transformation looks more painful than the one prior, it barely shifts halfway into a gruesome beast before returning back to its first body. he huffs while grasping his golden collar, "this... is not my original form. I have been cursed, long ago, to never set foot on human lands. this island is both my kingdom and prison."

you shakily stand up the marble floor, now noticing Coralie standing beside the throne with a pair of legs. slowly processing his words, you piece together the clues from his story and your memories of the abduction. this couldn't be...

"you are.. you're the sea serpent god! I can't believe grandma was right— shit, shit shit—"

he smirks at your panic, "correct. I am Anshumat; shapeshifter deity of the raging tides, granter of safe travels—"

"murderer and enslaver." you complete.

Anshumat roars, "correct again! you're on a strike, dear y/n. though trust me, my servants are treated well."

"..how do you know my name?"

"oh you poor thing, granny never told you? I know everything about you— a name is barely anything."

"told me what?"

"she used to be my cupbearer. until she escaped with that bastard traitor. isn't that right, Coralie?"

she nods, "yes, master."

"please sir, let me leave. my family— they'll search for me! I have a cat at home! I haven't even finished my favourite show.. so please..." you try to list more life goals.

he chuckled, "oh you are so amusing. and why would I do that? we've barely just been engaged, dear."

"what do you mean engaged?"

"I've been watching you since you took your first breath on earth, y/n. so imagine my surprise— to see you wrapped up in my favourite colour, like a pretty bride. you're my sacrifice."

fear tingles your spine, "wait, that was just a dare! i didn't really mean it!"

"doesn't matter. you will be my pearl."

"no! I have a family, a partner—"

"i said... it doesn't fucking matter." he slams his fist against the throne arm, "and you'll be seeing the head of that twat soon enough."

you don't give him a glance before you're turning your back and run down the staircase of the grand temple. careful not to trip, you focus on the flight of stairs, painfully aware of the loud footsteps approaching behind you. it doesn't take a second for Anshumat to pull on the collar of your shirt and slam you onto the staircase.

he sits atop you, lower region heavily grinding against your stomach. "get off me! don't you have hundreds of other options?! why me?!" you scream.

his bedazzled skin blocks your view of the sun, furious eyes glowing under his shadow, and sharp teeth bared into a snarl. "you do not get to leave me again. you will stay, and worship me. this island will be our eternal paradise."

large hands pressing against your throat, you struggle before darkness begins to cloud your vision.

"this time, you will live."

[lucrezianoin]

Here is how to get astarion approval so high he will proposition you before the tieflings party. No evil choices, just some chaos. The score you want is 40.

Not all of these are necessary btw, if you di all of this you'll get over 40. Avoid what sounds too evil and check that you're getting up to 40. Also remember that for the party romance you actually only need 20.

- When Lae'zel is in the cage, talk to her before releasing her and ask her to say "please"

- Attacking the thieves at the ruined temple

- When Shadowheart mention needing a cure (at camp) make sure to choose the option about being cautious

- When you meet with Zevlor, refuse to help saying you have your own problems. (you can help anyway, don't worry)

- When Lae'zel meets the tiefling and ask him to bow, go along with her at least once, then you can stop her and apologise to the poor man

- When you meet Wyll, you can talk with the guy training the children. Tell the children that they will all die

- After saving Arabella, tell the druid woman that you just wanted to see what would happen

- When you meet Auntie Ethel at the refugees' camp, let her fuss over you and then tell her about the tadpoles

- You know the kid with the magic ring trick? Pocket that ring

- When you meet the two siblings mourning their dying brother, Astarion will approve of you send them to face the owlbear (but I never choose this, because it makes me sad). But I think the big approval comes in the dialogue just next, where you can say that using the tadpole seems like a great idea

- At the blighted village, when the goblin spots you, you will get approval if you attack them back

- Say boooo to Volo

- Open the door where the sexy moans are happening

- At the entrance of the goblin camp, if you can, thow shit at the guard

- There's a goblin that will ask you to kneel and kiss his foot. Uno reverse it, and intimidate him

- Let the cleric at the goblin whip you

- After you free the owlbear, pet them at camp

- Get the necromancy of thay, and the amethyst that fits in it and give it to Astarion

- Recruit Karlach with him in the party

- Killing the monster Hunter will also shoot up your approval of TEN POINTS. I usually never kill him, but if you're close to the party and you really want to get to 40, this is also an option

- When you meet Raphael, agree with Astarion that you should not trust him

- If you decide to do auntie ethel too, make sure to convince her to free Maryna and get the deal at the same time

Now, I think the majority of approval will come with how you talk with him at camp.

- Go along with his dialogue about killing you if there's any tentacle showing. Just play along, don't shut him down

- Go along with the "whose blood would you drink" dialogue. Your answer doesn't really matter as long as you don't shut him down

- When he bites you, of course, offer to give him your blood

- During the mirror dialogue (sometimes it happens pre-sleeping together) you can insult him a bit (you're not aging gracefully), but at the second reply reassure him. The last reply is fine for all the lines and they seem to all get approval, as long as you don't just leave.

In general this is usually all I need to get to 40, which is pretty high. In my last playthrough I managed to also get to 40 without doing many of these.

But as I said, you only need 20. Just remember that he likes being petty and asserting dominance over others, he loves the tadpole, he is cautious, he's a little silly and chaotic, he's selfish, he likes joking and talking so don't shut him down.

Just remember that he's much more explicit about sex being an exchange if you get the proposition before the party, and you end up missing the scene of the party. Up to you! If you see that he's at 40 he will proposition the moment you talk to him, so if you accidentally got his approval too high and want to see both scenes you can technically kill the goblin leaders and free halsin, talk to him, then when you sleep you get directly to the party where you will have the party scene too.

[selfloverrrrrr]

Bloody Bond

Warnings : smut , heavy smut, unprotected sex, Noncon, Kidnapping, physically and emotional abuse, biting, size difference, Yandere Gojo, vampire Gojo, prince Gojo, stalking, protective, jealous, obsessive, manipulative....

( All characters are aged up/18+)

Minors Do Not Interact

Read the warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report

Halloween Masterlist

Y/n's POV

I was a girl from a farmer's family. I was their only girl. I had many friends in the village. I love to read books. Our family was poor. My father was working so hard for money. We needed it after all. One thing I always hated about my family.

And The thing I never liked about my family is they always try to convince me to marry. But I don't want to! I'm just 20 years old. I don't need to marry someone right now! I ignored them whenever they tried to talk about convincing me for marriage.

Me and my friends were in a field. Talking with each other. Suddenly Shoko my friend pulled the rubber band from my hair and untied my hair then started running. "Hey Shoko... stop!!" I screamed with a laugh. "Catch me!" She said. We both started running.

Shoko didn't notice that Mei Mei was in front of her. "Nevermind I got her" Mei Mei said grabbing the rubber band from Shoko's hand. "You always help her" Shoko sighed. We both laughed. I was tying my hair back when we heard a loud noise from beside us.

We looked in the direction. There was a bush. "What was that sound?" Mei Mei asked. "I don't know either" Shoko replied. "Let's see what it was" I said. We all went towards there. Then we slowly went behind the bush. Nothing was there.

"what was it?" I said. "We're thinking the same thing!" Shoko said. "Wait...is that blood?" I asked. I saw red liquid on the ground. "Shit...it is blood!" Mei Mei said. Suddenly we felt as if something ran at an inhuman speed behind us.

We all gasped and turned around. Nothing was there. It was almost 5pm. "What is this happening?" Shoko said. "I don't know either" I replied. "Y/n?... where's your rubber band?" Mei Mei asked. I realised my hair wasn't tied. "Shoko did you do that?" I asked.

"no... I promise...I didn't do that" Shoko replied. "Hey ... let's go home before it gets dark.... something creepy is happening" I said. "Yes I know... it's getting dark too!"Shoko replied. We all were scared. So we all went to our home.

We all went back to our home. At night me and my mother were having dinner. My father came in and said that a farmer of our village is dead. "What! How?" I asked. "Nobody knows...we just know that he was murdered" my father replied. "Oh and he's body was found behind some bushes of the field" he said.

My eyes widened. Didn't we see blood there today. I got scared. What was it? I didn't tell them anything... but I knew whatever it was...that ain't any human. But what is it? The question kept in my mind.

After the dinner I went to my room and locked the door. I was still thinking about those things. What the hell was that? People were saying that the farmer is killed by a monster. Was it really a monster? Cause I also felt something there. I sighed. 'let's forget about it for now and read the book I was reading ' I thought.

I went to my desk and sat there on the chair. There was a window in front of the desk. So the window was right in front of me. I kept it open for some wind. I opened the book and started reading from where I stopped last night. Time passed... I was still reading the book.

"y/n..." I heard as if someone whispered my name from in front of me. I immediately looked up. No one was there. But I heard that clearly! I started looking outside from the window. "I want you... don't say no" I heard a whisper in my ear. As if someone was standing just behind me and whispered in my ear.

I immediately looked back. No one was there. My heart beat started running fast. Now I am scared...who was it? I clearly heard someone's voice. I was almost crying. I quickly closed the window and went to bed. 'god please save me please!' I said.... then I fell asleep.

Next morning... everything was going normal... But we friends didn't go to the field today... cause who will go after hearing those things yesterday... Every day we friends went somewhere and talk with each other. We were at Shoko's house and when it was almost everything we came back to our home.

After reaching home I saw my parents talking. "Hey... I'm back" I said. "Come here I have a great news!" My mother said. "What I asked sitting next to her. "You know... someone send us a marriage proposal for you... and do you know who is it??? It's our king Gojo Satoru!" She said with a smile.

"what?" I asked with shock. "Yes it's true....he came here today...but you weren't at home" she replied. Our king Gojo Satoru Gave marriage proposal to me?! Why would he want to marry a normal girl especially he doesn't even know me... strange! But I brush off that thought.

"I don't care if it's the king or someone else... you know I don't wanna get married right now" I told them. They gave me a glare. "Look y/n... don't be like a fool...he said he'll help us with money and you'll leave a luxury life too...he said he wants the marriage next week... and you'll marry him, that's it!" She said.

"what do you mean next week?! I don't even know him!" I protested. "Y/n... I said you WILL marry him or else it's gonna be so bad!" She said and both my parents left the room. Why is this happening with me? Why don't they listen to me?! I know they're not gonna listen to me now....so,In one week I'm gonna be married with a complete stranger?!

A week later

The day came. I haven't talked with anyone for days because of the marriage. And the day finally came. I still wasn't happy about the marriage. The marriage was at night time they said it's some kind of rule of the royal family.

They sent me the wedding dress. I just unwrapped it. And oh my God! That dress is something else! I can feel it's so expensive just by seeing it... I wore it. My mother helped me to wear it. "You look pretty... you'll be so happy" she said after she decorated me for the wedding.

It was time for the marriage. They opened the door to the marriage hall. People were clapped. My father took my hand and we started walking towards the priest. I looked up then I saw the prince. Gojo Satoru. This is the first time I saw him.

He looks so handsome as if God himself made him. He looks as if he's the god himself. He was staring at me. I looked away and walked. Then I stand in front of him. He took my hand. He was still staring at me and I was staring at the ground. Because I still wasn't in the support of the marriage.

The priest started doing his job. A few minutes passed away. "Y/n, say you accept him as your husband" the priest said. I looked at the priest then at Gojo.

"Me y/n l/n accept prince Gojo as my husband" I said looking at my hand. "Now prince you should say your line" the priest said. "Me, Prince Gojo Satoru, accept y/n as my wife" Gojo said. "Now you two may kiss" the priest said.

Gojo leaned over me and pressed his lips on mine and kissed me. I didn't kiss him back. He realised I didn't kiss him back when he pulled away he smirked at me. I looked away. All people started clapping and giving us congratulations.

The day passed. The next morning came. I woke up from my sleep. Last night Gojo said he won't be at home because he has some royal work to do. That's why he wasn't there. The castle was so gorgeous... I got fresh and took a bath. Then did my breakfast the maids gave.

I was walking in the hallway. A maid was walking with me. "Woww! Is that the castle's garden?" I asked pointing to the garden through the window. "Yes,my lady" she replied. "I loved it... I love roses" I said.

"you like roses?" A voice asked behind us. We turned around and saw it was Gojo. He walked towards me and took my hand to kiss the back of my hand. He was about to kiss when I snatched away my hand. "Uh... yeah... I loved the garden" I replied looking at the garden.

Gojo didn't say anything and smirked. "Why don't you go visit it... Yuta? Go show her the garden" Gojo said to his assistant Yuta. "Yes,my lord.... come with me, my lady " Yuta said. Then I went to the garden. Gojo watched me with a smirk on his face.

Two or three days passed. But at night Gojo didn't come for some important work. But every morning there would be a huge Rose bouquet. Of course, he knew I love roses. Those made me happy. But after one day in the morning, I woke up.

My eyes opened slowly. I looked at the window the sunlight was coming from. But when I turned around I screamed seeing someone sleep beside me. Then I realised it was Gojo. He woke up from my scream.

"what happened?!" He asked. "N-No nothing.... I'm sorry... I didn't realise it's you... You don't come at night, so..." I explained. "Oh... yes, I didn't have much work to do yesterday... that's why I came... but you were sleeping, so I didn't wake you up" Gojo replied.

"it's okay... I'm sorry I disturbed your sleep" I said. "No... it's okay" he replied. I went up from the bed. "My best friend Geto is coming today to visit us" He said. "Ok" I replied and went to take a bath.

Time passed. "Y/n... come here" Gojo called me. I went there. "Meet him... he's my best friend Geto Suguru" Gojo said. I looked at the guy in front of me. Long black hair, sharp eyes, he's such a handsome guy. "Nice to meet you Geto-saan" I greeted him. He took my hand and kissed the back of my hand. "Nice to meet you too, y/n" he said. I blushed at his kiss. That wasn't unnoticed by Gojo whose smile dropped immediately.

Gojo's POV

After greeting me and Suguru went to a private room to talk. "Satoru, you haven't feed on her yet?" Geto asked. "No I haven't" I replied. "But why... she's pure... I can smell it" Geto said. I chuckled. "Yeah I know... don't worry gonna have it soon" I replied. "I have to say... You have control of yourself.... I could never...my fangs were almost coming out!" Geto said. We both laughed.

Y/n's POV

Two days passed. Some days ago The maid told me Gojo said to show me the library because I like books. There were too many books. I went there whenever I felt bored. Today I was in the library. Searching for a new book to read.

There was a side of the library. The maids always told me not to go that side. They said nobody is allowed to go to that side of the library. Today I was alone in the library. Not a single maid was with me. I thought why not go and see what is on that side.

I locked the door of the library and went to that side. I couldn't understand why nobody is allowed there. There's nothing suspicious or anything. It's the same as the rest of the library. But the books on this side were old. I was reading the titles of those books.

Then I found a book named "The History Of The Gojo Clan". Interesting... that surely is an interesting book. I was also interested to know their history. I picked that book and opened it. It was a fancy book.

I turned the page. On the first page the big heading says 'MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURES '. Well that's an interesting topic but why is it written in the book of the Gojo clan's history? I started reading the book. The book says...

You have probably heard about the vampires... What if I say they are real... Not only vampires, many more mythological creatures. The Gojo Clan. They are one of the vampire families. But something about the Gojo clan's vampires is special. They can read minds. As you know vampires are immortal. A few years ago a New vampire was born in the Gojo Clan. His name is Gojo Satoru. And he was born as the strongest vampire ever....

I didn't dare to read more. My hands are getting cold, my eyes wide open, heart skipped some beats, blood is getting chill. What in the fucking hell did I just read?! No no no.... fuck! Now I can process everything from that day. That farmer's death, a voice in my room that night... everything makes sense now! I can't let Gojo know that I know it... I've to act normal.

Time passed

Everything goes well. I acted normal. Nothing bad happened. After dinner I went to the bedroom. Now the things I read today were coming to my mind again. I changed myself from the royal gown to in a night dress. It was storming outside tonight. Suddenly I heard a knock on the door.

I gasped hearing the knocking sound. But nobody comes in this hour. Maybe any maid came to tell me something. I thought. I went to the door and opened it. My eyes slightly widened but then made them normal as I saw who it was. It was Gojo.

"you look shocked seeing me in my own bedroom" he said in a sarcastic tone and went in. "No... it's just...you don't come at night" I said and closed the door. I was scared of him but can't let him know. He was taking off his coat. "Yes... I don't have any work to do... it's not like I don't come to sleep...I just didn't come those nights because I had some royal work... it's done now I'll be free at night" he said with a smile.

I smiled back. My hand was slightly shaking. Don't think about it, don't think about it, don't think about it! Or else he'll know. I keep telling myself. He looked at me and slightly tilted his head. "Don't think about what?" He asked. My eyes widened. "W-what?" I said. "Don't think about what?" He asked seriously.

Fuck I forgot that he can read my mind that I'm telling myself not to think. He started walking towards me. I walked backwards. My back touched the table. He was standing in front of me. He tilted my chin up to look at him. "Don't think about what, y/n?" He repeated. I just stared at him. Then he smirked. Chill run through my spine.

"so you know, huh?" He asked with a smirk. My breath almost stopped. Fuck! It wasn't supposed to be like this! I thought. "Yeah...but it is like this" he whispered. Tears forming in my eyes. "P-Please.... please" the only thing that came out of my mouth.

He wrapped his hand around my waist and picked me up with one hand. Then took me towards the bed. "Please what, darling?" He asked. He laid me on my back and now he was on top of me. "I don't wanna.... I don't wanna die... please" I replied. Now the tears started falling from my eyes.

His face was too close to mine. He took my hand. Kissed the palm of my hand. Then licked the pulse. "Didn't you snatch away your hand from me when I was about to kiss your hand.... But give your hand to Suguru...let him kiss your hand?" He said with a smirk.

"I didn't on purpose... P-Please" I sobbed. "You know I can read mind right?... What were you thinking? He's handsome? You loved his eyes?" He asked. I couldn't reply I just sobbed. "But I read your mind on our wedding night too... when you first saw me" he said with a smirk.

"but that doesn't change the fact that you acted like a brat with me but gave attention to my best friend" he said. He brought his face to my neck and inhaled. "Now tell me what I should do?" He said. I couldn't reply. He laughed and looked at me.

His fangs slowly came out. Fear grabbed me. I started crying again. "Please.. P-Please please" I sobbingly begged. He licked my neck and his fangs rubbed against my skin. That gave me chills. "Where's your bratty attitude now, huh?" He asked.

"please... I won't do it again please... I'm sorry" I said. "So you're saying you'll behave?... let's see " he said. Then he grabbed the top of my night dress and tore it in one snatch. I screamed and tried to cover myself under him. "Now you just said you will behave!" He said and pinned me to the bed.

He pressed his lips on mine. Forcing his tongue inside my mouth. Kissing me roughly. I pushed his chest with full of my force. But he didn't even move an inch. Of course vampires are strong. And I read in that journal that he's the strongest vampire. He pulled away. I was taking a deep breath.

He kissed on my chest. "You're so gorgeous" he said and took a nipple in his mouth. Sucking on it harshly. I moaned loudly. He pressed his body down to mine. His dick was pressed against my thigh. I could feel it was fucking hard.

He pulled away from my breast. "Mmhh... you're driving me crazy" he said rubbing his crotch on my thigh. "Ughh...god I can't.... I can't anymore!" He said then stopped rubbing his crotch. He sat up and took off his clothes.

He positioned himself. "P-Please don't" I said. He rubbed the tip on my clit. "Shhhh" He said with a smirk and slammed his length inside me. I screamed. He let out a groan. "F-fuck... you feel like heaven!" He moaned.

He started thursting in and out roughly. I was throughig my legs with pain and begging him to stop. "You don't know...you don't know how much I wanted this....fuckkkk....it feels so good" he moaned loudly. His thrust became harder and harder. "That day .... you were with your friends....in the field.... I was...fuckkk.... I was there feeding on someone and I saw you.... You're the first girl I have ever seen this gorgeous..... I promised myself to marry you.....and yes... I was the one who came to your house that night when you were reading some books" he said between moans.

"can Suguru make you feel like this?... Can he?... You were being a bad wife that day, y/n" he said. He kissed my neck. "Do you know how hard it is for a vampire not to feed on a virgin" he said between breaths. He thrust more roughly. "It's hurting.... I-It's hurting too much " I sobbed.

The thing I thought came out true. I clenched around him tightly and he moaned loudly " ughhhhhh....ahhh s-so...ahhhh....so f-fucking tight " he started rubbing my clit with his thumb and I bite his shoulder scratched his back to control myself. With a few more thurst I came. He was still thursting roughly. "I want blood....let me feed on you" he said.... before I could respond he pulled out his frangs and dug them on my neck. I screamed in the pain. But he was being gentle while feeding on me. I felt his cock pulsing inside me. Within a minute he came inside me I could feel his seed inside me. He pulled out. My vision blurred out.

"your blood tastes so good...oh, fainted already?" He said with a chuckle. "Darling, don't be afraid... I won't hurt you... I love you... why would I give you a marriage proposal, If I had to kill you" he whispered and kissed the forehead of my unconscious body.

Give me your requests guys...

I love when you give me your requests 💕

[theblueflower05]

you said extra nasty ? i want Neteyam to choke me then slap me (not that hard tho) and spit in my mouth simultaneously 🤤

Ughhhhh. Getting sweet boy Neteyam worked up enough to be brutal with you is hard- but once he’s there? BABY. He’s there.

Lotsa Smut below the cut

Like. It would take days of teasing to make him snap.

Listen we all know I’m a soft submissive Neteyam lover, but I think when he’s dominant it’s in a very body worship kind of way. Like he’s making you come over and over and ravaging your body until you can’t breathe.

So getting him to just jack-hammer you and like take out all of his aggression on you? It’s a delicate formula and it doesn’t happen often.

It’s a multitude of things. It’s the tiny tweng you don for the day, and the way it sits on your swaying hips. It’s you kissing him long and hard as he leaves with the war party- and finally. It’s a hard tug on his tail while he’s chatting with his father and the other Omiticayan generals.

It has him seeing red.

You’re being such a fucking BRAT. Acting out horribly for attention.

And so he gives you all of his attention. Just not in the way you’d expect-

He’s mean. Vicious instead of praising. He fucks you you’re a crying blubbering mess. Drenched in come and sweat and tears.

“Oh yawne” Neteyam croons meanly. He has you pinned to the ground, your thighs spread painfully wide as his hips snap into you. He’s fucking you without remorse- it’s maddening “you need to shut up. You’re being too loud”

How can you be quiet when he’s pounding you like this?

Every breath comes out in a wheezing gasp- knocked out of your chest by the force of his thrusts. Your poor pussy is swollen and over used- so hyper sensitive from the orgasms that he’s wrong out of you that it feels like you’re on fire in your core.

You can’t stop crying. Can’t stop pushing him away. Can’t stop pulling him in for more.

You try to tell him- but all that comes out is a blubbery mess, your voice high and snotty “Can-can’t. Can’t. Can’t”

The huff he lets out is annoyed, he’s so beyond over your shit.

First you want to make him lose it?

Now you can’t even have enough decorum to be quiet- don’t you know the entirety of high camp can mostly likely hear you?

They can hear your pathetic wailing. Your moans. Your slutty cries. You’ll be dubbed the village whore if you don’t shut up.

So he makes you.

Neteyam’s hands have always been gorgeous to you. They’re so strong, all lean and sinew. Capable of murder- but also of incomprehensible tenderness. He’s used them to slit the throats of Sky People, but also to gently braid Tuk’s hair.

They are no less stunning as he reaches up to wrap them around your throat. First one, and then both. Your thin delicate neck completely encased by his big hands as he continues to fuck you.

He chokes the sounds down before they can come.

Your mouth is open- in a silent scream as your golden eyes fearfully search his. He’s never done this to you. It thrills you as much as it scares you.

Neteyam just gives you a reassuring look, before he firmly squeezes at your pulse point.

Your pussy flutters and creams around him and you go limp. The pleasure other worldly. You belong to him, in that moment, and for the rest of time.

“You’re something else” Neteyam laughs at you. Watching your glazed over expression as he chokes you.

You’re too blissed out to speak. Not that you could anyway, with his strong hands around your throat.

You mouth one word.

Yours.

You’re so filthy. You bring out the fucking worst in him and he doesn’t understand why he likes it so much.

When your mouth opens and your pretty pink tongue sticks out- pleadingly- he knows what you want.

Neteyam spits without aim. The globs of his saliva don’t land right in your waiting, open mouth, but all over your face. Mixing with your own tears and slobber.

You’re a complete mess…well. Not completely. Not as much as you can be-

When he lets go of your throat and pulls out of your bartered cunt you breathe a sigh of relief. It’s over, time to cuddle. You need the after care desperately-

Instead Neteyam walks on his knees until he’s crouching by your head. He’s working his hard cock furiously in his fist and there’s a look of determination in his eyes.

You’re as pretty as a picture. Your hair everywhere, long limbs akimbo. Your chest is heaving and you’re still fucking crying. Maybe next time you won’t push him to his limit.

When your face scrunches, brows bones raising cutely and nose all bunched up, he can feel his balls going taught- and then that little tongue peeks out again. Pleading for his release.

He paints your face white white his sticky viscus cum, and watches you shiver at being soiled. You’re limp on the floor of your shared tent- used and shaking.

You asked for this. He has to remind himself. You needed this.

He’s coming down from his high and starting to feel really fucking guilty at the state he’s left you in when he notices your thin tail wagging behind you.

You peer up at him, face covered him his cum and eyes exhausted and glassy…you manage to give him a devious smile.

Eywa, you’re such a brat.

Aaaaaand I’m out. Dom Neteyam isn’t really my cup of tea but I hope I did him justice lol

[bokutosbiceps]

‘tis the season | kengan ashura

gaolang wongsawat/kanoh agito/kure raian/tokita ohma x gn!reader | fluff | ~1k words

warnings: some suggestive/18+ themes but nothing explicit + obviously cursing bc rai is involved my piece of shit man

a/n: welcome to my xmas special for the kengan boys !! as usual, i chose to write for my fav men. it was sooo hard to decide wtf raian would do because he would refuse to do any of these activities but i think what i chose fits him p well LOL.also I’M SORRY OHMA’S IS SO SHORT BUT I THINK IT’S CUTE, m’kay, so pls enjoy 🎄

18+ MDNI | under the cut for length

gaolang wongsawat finds going to the christmas market with you to be the perfect way to spend his evening. the first stop that you two will make, which is a must, is the coffee stall. he’ll pay for both of your coffees and tip the stall attendant just a little bit extra since he’s feeling the holiday spirit. then he’ll tuck his hands into his pockets and you’ll thread your arm through his and thus begins your journey through the stalls.

gaolang holds you close as you trudge through the market, appreciating all of the pretty stalls decorated with lights and tinsel. you two will stop at every single food stall, and gaolang insists on sharing all of his food with you. he thinks it’s cute the way that your smile reaches your eyes and scrunches your nose when you bite into something that’s hot and tasty.

otherwise, it’s mostly silent, save for the quiet murmur of the crowd around you and your excited comments at anything cute your eyes may land on. gaolang is silently taking note of these things, because he will be coming back to the market without you to buy you each and every one of whatever you showed any interest in. 

kanoh agito is a man of many, many talents, including chopping down the christmas tree for your shared abode. you and kanoh make the long drive up to the mountains to pick out your tree, and you stand back and let your eyes rake over you man while he swings his axe against the poor tree of your choosing.

he sheds his coat and his long sleeve, leaving him only in a tank top to allow for full range of motion, spits into his hands, and grabs the axe like his life depends on it. agito, all rippling muscles, swings the blade of the axe against the tree like a pro, using his hips to add extra power into his swing until the tree is hanging on by a mere, woody thread.

“were you a lumberjack in a past life, babe?” you joke as you watch him tie the tree down to the hood of your car with twine.

“lumber…jack?” agito doesn’t stop what he’s doing but he throws a questioning glance over his shoulder at you. you giggle, remembering that this towering hunk of man still has much to learn about the world around him. you walk up to his side and give the twine a good tug to ensure that it’s secure before turning around and leaning your back against your car.

“don’t worry about it. you were just chopping down this tree like such an expert, i thought maybe you’d done this in a past life.” you watch as agito shrugs his layers of clothing back on and comes back over to you, leaning on the car next to you.

“i’m surprised you noticed my axe technique since you were too busy ogling me.” agito smirks at you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pressing you into his side. you gasp in fake embarrassment.

“i don’t know how i’m supposed to resist! you took off your coat on purpose!” you tease.

agito just chuckles and leans down to place a kiss to the top of your head, whatever you say, doll.  

kure raian’s least favorite thing about moving back into kure village is the fact that he is required to decorate the house with christmas lights. erioh gets on his ass, starting in september, to remind him that he must decorate his villa to keep the village looking nice and uniform for the holidays.

“the fuck do i care about uniformity and niceties? we’re fucking assassins, not little ass elves.” raian grumbles as he untangles the string of lights. he continues to mutter and and whine while he fights with the cord and you’re watching in pure delight as you lay out the corny, tacky decorations you bought for the front yard.

raian brings the ladder down from the garage wall with one arm, his muscle flexing and relaxing as he brings it to the spot under the peak of the roof. 

“get over here and hold the ladder for me.”

“can i get a please?” you raise your eyebrows at him, knowing full well you’re in dangerous territory as it is.

“i ask my bitch to do something for me and i get lip?” raian huffs a laugh, throwing his head back in an exaggerated manner. “just get over here before i lose my shit.” 

you laugh and obey your husband, dutifully holding the ladder steady while he quickly and cleanly hangs the lights on the edge of the roof. you’re surprised at how efficiently raian works, and how it actually doesn’t look like shit when he’s finished.

“i’m proud of you, rai.” you smile at him and press a quick kiss to his lips when he comes down from the ladder. despite the annoyed frown on his lips, he’s quick to snake his arms around the small of your back as he looks up at the roof, seemingly proud of his work. he nods in satisfaction before turning back to you.

“now, why don’t we go back inside and you can show me just how proud you are, hm?” raian’s hand drifts down the small of your back till it reaches the top of your butt. you just shake your head and smack his hand away. 

“we’ve still got the yard to decorate, stud.”

tokita ohma is okay with the holidays, because the holidays mean it’s gonna get cold, and the cold means you’re gonna turn on the fireplace, and turning on the fireplace means he will be napping by the fireplace. ohma really only finds it comfortable enough when you’re with him, though, so he’ll wait for whenever you’re not busy to pull you onto the carpet in front of the fireplace.

he wraps his body around you, tucking your head underneath his chin and bringing his knees up behind yours to effectively keep you trapped. lastly, he wraps his arms tightly around your waist and pulls you backwards until you’re flush against his firm chest.  he lets out a deep and content sigh, and you can imagine that his lips are curled upward into a soft smile as he closes his eyes.

“don’t leave, ‘kay?” he mutters before letting out another sigh. you chuckle softly at his request, wondering how on earth you’d ever even be able to escape the strong embrace of your lover. but it’s not like you’d want to anyways.

taglist: @ohmaswife | @kamesama | @thebigevilsamp | @itbitesback | @aloelotustea | @hoe4rairai | @himbo-in-limbo

[obitos-whore]

First date headcanons/imagine for Obito

Tw: None. Just fluff and chaos/crack, cuz I feel like bullying good ol' Bito today and needed something to cheer myself up

Plans everything down to the tiniest detail. From the time and location to the stuff you will be doing. Obito is a perfectionist and aims to impress his darling.

He gets incredibly irritated when someone points out that he's going overboard and "doing too much" for his first date

When it finally comes to taking his darling out, the first thing he'll do is give them a large bouquet of their favourite flowers. He may or may not have bought up the entire stock of them too

He'll take you to the Hokage monument, where he has planned a nice picnic, followed by watching the sunset and some romantic stargazing afterwards for the two of you

What makes it extra special is the fact that he had prepared the food all by himself. Which is a huge deal, considering Obito is not the greatest when it comes to cooking. He does manage to heat up water in a kettle for his instant ramen without burning it, but the rest of his kitchen is basically just decoration

That's why he took cooking lessons from the grannies and gentlemanly advices from the grandpas of Konoha, to sharpen up his cooking skills and perfect his mannerism

When you two arrive at the top of the Hokage mountain, the first disaster occurs right away; a wild animal has ravaged the site and eaten all the foods he had prepared, including your favourite dessert

This leaves Obito in shambles and looking like a soaked puppy that has been kicked multiple times. He just wanted to impress you and now he stands there with absolutely nothing but the remains of what was supposed to be the perfect day

He tries to do some damage control and quickly comes up with a back-up plan to save not only whatever dignity he got left, but also to make the day still somehow enjoyable despite this bitter setback

That's when the second disaster comes buzzing right towards you. Literally

At first, it's only a few bees showing interest in your flowers. No worries, right? But it gradually gets more until Obito swats one particularly pesky bee away from your face

Aggravated by that action, the bees suddenly got a new target: You

Realising his mistake, Obito grabs you by the wrist and drags you with him all the way down the flight of stairs and back into the village

During your escape, you try to keep the pursuing bees at bay, using your bouquet as a makeshift swatter, which doesn't prove to be effective and only angers the little insects more. Resulting in the both of you getting stung

Not wanting you to get hurt further, Obito scooped you up and acted as a shield to protect you from those nasty stingers and therefore took the most of it

In a last, desperate attempt to distract and hopefully get rid of your pursuers, you drop the bouquet, which once again proves ineffective

It wasn't until Obito had reached the entrance to the Uchiha District that the aggressive pursuit suddenly came to a stop, thanks to the Aburame clan, who had been informed about a rampaging bee swarm

Hungry, sweaty, exhausted and with a shit ton of burning bee stings everywhere, Obito sets you back down

You can tell that he's completely devastated and humiliated by today's events

"I am so sorry, Y/n... I swear! I had everything planned out. The picnic, the sunset, the stargazing... And for what?"

Unable to bear the sight of Obito being so disheartened over what happened, you suggest to take care of his stings for him and get takeout and just have a stay at home date

Obito, genuinely surprised that you didn't ditch him after that fiasco, happily agrees to your suggestion

While taking care of the poor guy, he does his best not to complain about the pain caused by the stings, even though sitting down not only hurts like ass, but, in fact, also hurts his ass

Once you're done tending to the pincushion Uchiha, he sets up a nice little candlelight dinner, with some old candles he had found in one of the kitchen drawers

It's certainly not the most romantic first date, but it's not a complete flop either

[twstfanblog]

Monster AU Lore Facts 2

Riddle is a doctor who works through science, the town still mainly goes to his mother for leechings and replacing their blood with milk so he's kinda struggling to make ends meet.

Floyd shows up to his clinic with a small child who looks nothing like him claiming his 'son' was sick (OC Larimar)

Riddle 100% thinks this unknown man with raggedy clothes just kidnapped this child and tries to get the boy to admit that he doesn't know Floyd so he can call the police in the area.

BUT, Larimar is Floyd's kid so he keeps quiet during the examination. Riddle does diagnose Larimar with the flu but instead of giving the bottle of medicine to Floyd claims that they need to come back every day to get a dose.

Riddle is fully convinced Larimar is just a kidnapped child until he finds out they're both monsters.

Leona was injured escaping his territory and hid in a cave to lick his wounds. Ruggie found him and was threatened to get him food.

Ruggie's village is poor as shit so he can only bring small scraps of meat and fruit for this monster to eat. Leona, seeing this, starts paying Ruggie at the start of each winter with one of the many golden beads he has around his neck.

Ruggie uses the money he gets from the bead to help his village, slowly improving their living condition each year. Ruggie and Leona start to have their unspoken romance once Leona is fully healed and tells Ruggie he won't be there next winter.

Rook and Vil have been having a back-and-forth, prey and predator dynamic for actual years. Vil is deeply flattered that Rook thinks his 'true face' is beautiful.

Vil is pregnant and he fully blames Rook like he's not also completely involved in how it fucking happened. Rook was of course overjoyed and quickly convinced Vil to move in with him for safety reasons.

Rook is now falsely convicting nobles of witchcraft so that Vil will have easy access to noblemen. (Aw, he's hunting for him)

Epel was placed in Rook's home after he was taken from his stepfather's home. Epel found Rook's maid nice enough but also he was deeply terrified because she would stare at him for long periods of time before acting as though nothing was wrong.

Vil was pissed finding out Epel wasn't of noble blood because he was PERFECT.

[soleminisanction]

Issue 6 of "The Saga of the Super Sons" answers an important question: where the fuck has Dick been in this scenario?

Answer, apparently: At college.

Which is... where Bruce Junior is supposed to be. Bruce Junior, whose mother Bruce almost certainly met years after he took Dick in as a ward. Bruce Junior, who appears to be younger than Dick, but not by that much.

If you came at a Silver or Bronze Age writer with today's modern "but why is this character still 17" bullshit, I think they'd laugh directly in your face.

By the by, Dick is here because Bruce has been murdered.

I guess some things never change.

This does present an amusing comparison with the more modern takes on the subject like Prodigal/Knightfall, Gotham Knights (the game) and Battle for the Cowl, because here the boys treat Batman like something they expect to be left to one of them in Bruce's legal, actual will, like the one read out loud by his lawyer, implying the lawyer would be in on the whole secret identity thing.

When that obviously doesn't happen they come to an agreement to both... team up? But also compete? To find out who murdered Bruce, and whoever does the actual uncovering wins the cowl. This, for... reasons involves seal hunting in the Arctic and, ah... northern Native people. Which means a lot of use of a certain slur that all Natives in that biome used to (and still do) get lumped under, which I shall endeavor to write around but just know, there's a lot of it. Like, a lot. A loooooot.

Less awkwardly, check out what Dick Dillin apparently thought a killer whale looked like:

Hell, look at those mildly demonic black seals. I know this was pre-Internet dude but you could've gone to your local library. Or picked up a Seaworld ad.

Another thing that apparently never changes: Super-Sons comics insisting that only blood relatives count as "real" children.

To be fair, I wasn't actually expecting to see Dick referred to as Bruce's son at all in this. And Bruce Jr. is the only one who says this, and he's pretty consistently portrayed as the more immature and bratty one in this equation, so it doesn't really feel like the story is "agreeing" with him, it's just an interesting parallel.

Of course, because this is the 70s, they don't have any consideration for things like tactical costume changes or the realities of being mostly normal guys in the Arctic. So, though the boys arrive wearing sensible parkas, once they change into their superhero costumes Dick is just, snow shoeing through the tundra and water skiing behind a seal in his short sleeves and bare legs.

You'll probably be grateful to hear that the white industrial seal hunter is in fact the bad guy of this story -- this is actually one of the more cohesive stories in the saga so far in that regard. Simon Link was exploiting the land by killing too many seals, and then massacred part of the native village when they fought back trying to stop him, so this man Malook wanted to kill him. But, unable to find him and unable to get the white authorities to listen to him, he instead traveled to America to target his business partner, Bruce Wayne.

Bruce Junior is appalled by the accusations but, interestingly, Dick is willing to hear the guy out. When Link's crime is exposed (with the help of the Supers Senior and Junior, natch), he tries to escape across the ice.... disguised as a seal... aaaaand...

Huh. Okay then. Justice is served, I guess.

Oh also Bruce Senior's still alive.

I mean... good on you for realizing the need to make amends for funding exploitative colonialism, Brucie-boy, but did you have to do it in a way that put your son through the exact same trauma you went through? Complete with the murder mystery dinner theater death scene?

Not to mention your poor wife, do you know how much shit you two have put her through in the last however long it's been?? Junior faked his death complete with a full funeral in the first issue of the saga and now you're doing the same thing! If you actually did marry Talia she'll gut you both the next time she sees you and probably Dick too just because she's never liked him.

Anyway, for a parting shot, check out the image they used to advertise this story on the cover, it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Beware the Ominous Pixie Boot!

[dylan-o-yumm]

Little Moments - Leon S. Kennedy/reader

It has been a hot minute... I’m sorry I’m not making an amazing come back with DMC or Nero content, but hey at least it's still Capcom? Anyway, Leon is babygirl 

Also read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46338547

Words: 6.6k Summary: Leon rescued both you and Ashley from the events of RE4, now the thereof you are "relaxing" in a hotel, unwinding before Leon has to take you both home in the morning.

Part 1, Part 2

“I could sleep for a year.”

“Just a year? Rookie numbers.”

“Are you guys kidding me? I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep a wink after everything I’ve seen over the last few days.” Ashley wrapped her arms around herself and looked wearily around the cozy hotel room, as if a crazy, plaga-infected Spanish person was going to jump out from the shadows. You couldn’t blame her for being so on edge, you’d be the same if Leon wasn’t there with you.

Ashley was the president's daughter and you were… just someone who was in that damn village at the wrong damn time. Leon was a special agent of some sort, somebody the president sent to find his daughter— but Leon just so happened to find you first. He saved you. And then he saved you again. And again, and again. No matter what happened, you knew Leon would be there like a knight in shining armor.

He made you feel safe but, the poor guy looked like shit and needed to finally rest. He had done so much work, busted his ass for— fuck, was it really only a day? Two days? You can’t remember how long you were there, let alone how long Leon was there looking for Ashley — and by proxy, you as well.

“Ash, it’s fine. We’re out of the village now. And even if some of the Iluminados freaks managed to escape, well… you saw how they were after their lord and savior kicked the bucket.” You turned to face Leon, gesturing for a little reassurance to come from him. Hopefully hearing it come from Leon would calm Ashley’s nerves somewhat.

Leon blinked and his lips parted as if he hadn’t been listening to a single word that had been said since he commented on how you wanted to sleep for a year. However he snapped back to hero mode rather quickly, looking around the room while he stretched his back muscles.

“I’ll stay up and make sure you’re safe. My job isn’t done yet.”

You and Ashley both shared a look.

“I think out of all of us, you need sleep the most, Leon.” Ashley told him with a concerned look on her face and you nodded in agreement. You opened your mouth to add your insight but Leon raised his hand to stop you, already knowing that you were going to demand that he sleep before you knock him out with a frying pan.

“I dozed off a few times at the village, I’ll be fine.” He shrugged as if it really didn’t bother him but you could see the exhaustion all over his face and in his shoulders, his muscles. Hell he had an aura around him that beamed like a bright neon sign that made you tired just by looking at him.

“It’s just one night. I’ll take you both home tomorrow and then I can go home and sleep for as long as I want, how’s that sound?”

“Leon…” Ashley sighed but you beat her to the punch.

“I’m too tired to argue. Just, at least sit down or something. I’ll make you some coffee,” you sighed and rubbed your forehead where a sharp headache started to irritate you. You dealt with too many loud noises; explosions, gunshots, too many bright lights from flash grenades and fires from molotovs, and the screaming and yelling of the Illuminados or Ashley or yourself. Everything from that damn village and the island, up until the point of getting out of the ocean after a long, loud and bumpy ride on a jet ski, was all building up into one big headache.

Leon didn’t have anything else to say after that, opting to do as you said and taking a seat on the couch by the window. You moved to the small kitchen and started boiling water while Ashley said she was going to go have a shower.

The three of you were still pretty filthy. The ocean water washed some of the grime off, but the stench still lingered and you all had scrapes, cuts and bruises. Your body ached from all the running around and getting thrown about and whacked and hit and kicked by the crazy villagers. Leon took the brunt of it all though, which is why you were worried about him the most. He really needed to rest. For a week. Or in your words; a year.

You all did.

Once the coffee was made, you brought a mug out for Leon, pausing for a moment to watch as he yawned so intensely his eyes started watering. Though, when he noticed you looking at him, he quickly shut his mouth and rubbed his eyes, pretending he hadn’t just been fighting off the urge to sleep. He gave you a little half smile and went back to unwrapping the bandage from his arm to check one of his many wounds.

You could have teased him for yawning, you could have angrily told him to get some sleep. But you didn’t.

“Need any stitching up?” You asked as you placed his mug on the coffee table in front of him, holding a second mug in your hand and moving it to your lap as you sat down on the couch beside him. The heat from the mug warmed your hands and made you feel more at ease.

”No. I could do with a good massage though,” he replied with a small grunt, rolling his shoulder out and you got a good look at his bicep. There was a scratch from an ax being thrown at him that, thankfully, only just nicked him. A long, but thankfully, not deep gash from his battle against Saddler. And finally a large bruise that spanned from his shoulder down to his elbow in an odd splotchy pattern. You weren’t sure what that one was from but you could take at least a dozen guesses.

You weren’t sure if he was asking you to give him a massage or not— he sure did like his cheesy one-liners and little quips, maybe this was one of them?

“Get in line, buddy. I don’t think I’ll physically be able to get out of bed in the morning,” yeah, that was a good common ground to avoid any confusion and possible embarrassment.

“It will be tough, yeah…” you could tell he was speaking from experience. How many crazy missions like this had this poor man been through? “You handled yourself well out there. I want you to know that.”

He turned his gaze to your direction but he didn’t quite meet your eye. He sounded genuine though and it made your heart skip a beat.

“You mean by… running, hiding, screaming. Oh yeah I handled myself very well,” you chuckled sarcastically and brought your cup of coffee to your lips, taking a sip.

“Hey, just because you didn’t kill anything, doesn’t mean you weren’t tough or brave,” now he finally met your eye. His own eyes, so incredibly blue that it was hard to remember them glossing over and turning a dull red from the plagas only a few hours ago.

Was that a few hours ago? It felt like it had been days since that happened.

You didn’t know how to respond, and thankfully Leon spoke up again before you could.

“Are you drinking coffee?”

“Maybe.”

“You’re not trying to stay awake, are you?”

“I don’t think even coffee could help me stay awake at this point.” Was it a lie? No. Was it a small truth that you admitted so that you didn’t have to reveal the big truth? Possibly. You were definitely too tired for coffee to keep you awake, but you were also trying to stay awake, at least a little longer, so that Leon wouldn’t have to suffer through the night alone. You couldn’t imagine what kind of thoughts he must have when it got quiet, when he wasn’t busying himself by running around castles or villages, or killing monsters.

You were tired. But so was Leon and this was the least you could do for him… You just couldn’t tell him that’s what you were doing, or he would probably knock your ass out.

You’re not a fighter. You’re not a cool secret agent with gadgets, nor were you a military trained soldier who could turn anything into a weapon. You couldn’t do the things Leon could do, you couldn’t protect him, you couldn’t save him from monsters…

Staying awake for a night just to keep him company so that he didn’t have to suffer alone? It wasn’t grand, it was nothing like the magnitude of favors and rescues he had done for you over the last however many days. But it was something. You couldn’t really do much else.

Maybe you should give him that damn massage.

“So why are you doing all of this, Leon?” You asked, wanting to change the subject so he wouldn’t figure out your little plan. He raised an eyebrow at you over his cup of coffee and you elaborated. “You came to the village because of the president's orders, right? To save Ashley… So what made you want to work for the president of all people? Or is that classified information?” You teased, knowing damn well it could definitely be very classified.

Leon chuckled.

“It’s a little classified, yeah. But I will tell you that… I met a girl a few years ago. And I want to make sure she’s safe,” he nodded softly to himself, as if reminding himself why he just went through all the horrors of the village. His already soft features softened even more as he thought about this girl.

“Is she your girlfriend?”

“I think that’s illegal considering she’s a child,” he smirked slightly, as you looked down at your lap in embarrassment. “She escaped Raccoon City with me and another woman named Claire.”

“Is she your girlfriend?” You asked again, emphasis on the ‘she’ and a little teasing smile on your lips.

“Suddenly interested in my love life, huh?”

“Maybe I’m just trying to be a good wingman for Ashley. You know she’s crushing hard for you.”

“Oh this is for Ashley, huh?” His lips curl in amusement and you shrug, playing innocent. You both smile at one another as the world seems to stop spinning for a moment. Everything was quieter, the sound of rushing water from Ashley’s shower had even been drowned out, and now it was just you and Leon. You could breathe, you could take your time and just look at him, taking in the fine details of his face; the color of his irises, the sharpness of his jaw, the dip of his cupid's bow, the pinkness of his lips and the strongness of his chin.

Beautiful.

Inside and out, this man was… beautiful.

He was looking at you too, but it was different. His eyes dimmed, no longer shining along with his smile… it was like a part of him had left and gone somewhere else, no longer sitting right beside you. He looked through you, barely seeing you at all as he reminded himself of his job and why he was here. His smile faded and his eyes dropped, refusing to meet your gaze anymore.

You were admiring everything about him, and he was slowly drifting away from you. Like two ships passing in the night.

“Look… I can’t— I can’t have someone—“ he sighed and scooted closer to you on the couch, resting his gloved hand over the top of yours that was still holding your coffee mug. He was warm, even the leather of his glove was warm and it grounded you– it was a little prickly from where it had torn and frayed a little, from welding guns and knives all day long. His hand squeezed yours once, his pinky resting against the pulse point on your wrist. “I just can’t. Sorry...”

He was definitely not talking about Ashley anymore. You were only teasing and joking around about his relationship status, and you knew that he was far too good for you. Thanks to your low self esteem, and your confidence in Leon never being capable of looking at you the way you looked at him… that ship sailed hours and hours ago, practically when you very first laid eyes on him… But his words still felt like a knife to your heart for some reason.

You blinked once, shaking yourself out of the trance you had put yourself in, and your lips parted. You weren’t sure if you wanted to say something, or if you were going to say something, or if you should have said anything at all. But thankfully—

“Leon! Your turn! You stink. Who knew saving some damsels in distress was such tough work, huh?” Ashley teased as she burst out of the bathroom looking completely refreshed and clean. Her hair was twisted up into her towel while she wore the same clothes she wore in the village. Maybe you could go in search for some robes the three of you could wear or something— at least just for the night. You could go buy some clothes in the morning before the three of you headed back to your respective homes.

You and Leon jumped apart and refused to look at one another, as if you had been caught doing something naughty by your parents. If a hand on yours was considered naughty then you never wanted to be pure. Leon took a final sip of his coffee before placing the mug back down on the coffee table, and when he stood, he looked at Ashley, vaguely gesturing towards her. “Will you two be okay while I’m gone? I’ll only be a few minutes.”

“Leon please. The only thing we’re in danger from right now is your body odor,” she teased even more, skipping over to grab Leon’s arm and ushering him towards the bathroom. “Im stronger than I look, don’t make me wrestle you into the shower, Leon.”

You blushed at the thought of Ashley and Leon anywhere near a shower together.

“Alright,” he chuckled but paused in the doorway of the bathroom, finally looking towards you again, but you were silent and didn’t quite know how to feel or react. “Yell if you need me, okay?” It was directed towards the both of you but his eyes were burning a hole into your face.

You simply nodded. And Leon disappeared behind the bathroom door.

———————————————————

“Need me to tuck you in or something?” Leon asked teasingly as he walked over to you. Ashley was fast asleep in one of the single beds, having passed out when you went for your shower after Leon. The three of you were clean, dressed in robes (well Leon wasn't), all comfy— but very tired. No amount of coffee could help.

You were sitting on the armchair by the second single bed, (there were only two but Leon said he was fine sleeping on the couch— this was obviously before he stupidly agreed to just not sleep at all for the night) a book in your lap, one that the hotel just had laying in the small bookshelf. It was terrible and not your idea of a good time at all, but there wasn’t much else to do. You could watch tv but you didn’t want the noise to keep Ashley up.

“Tell you a bedtime story?” He offered once you didn’t say anything to his first teasing question. “I don’t know how good of a story teller I am…”

“I'm fine, Leon. Thanks though,” you smiled up at him. You weren’t mad and you weren’t holding a grudge, you were just confused and felt a little awkward from your previous conversation with him. And with you acting awkward it only made things even more awkward— it… had been a rough few days.

“Okay…” he watched you skeptically for a moment. “Are you worried about falling asleep? I had the same problem after Raccoon City.”

“No-“

“Because I don’t mind staying up, and I can sit closer to your bed if it makes you feel any better?”

“Leon-“

“Ashley’s already knocked out so she won’t mind if I’m keeping an extra close eye on you until you fall asleep.”

“I'm fine. I swear. I just don’t feel like sleeping right now is all…” You looked up at him and smiled, closing your book to lightly wack his stomach with it. He took a step back and placed his hand over the spot you just walked, looking down with a faint smile.

“Right…” he nodded, sighing as he fell back onto your bed, spreading his legs like all men do, and resting his elbows on his knees. His upper body was leaning towards you where you sat on the armchair in between the window and the bed and, feeling a heat make its way onto your cheeks, you quickly went back to reading your book.

“What are you reading?” His voice was lower and softer than it was just a second ago, it sent shivers down your spine.

“I couldn’t tell you. I haven’t taken in a single word since I picked it up,” you looked back over at him and smiled with a small shrug as if to say ‘what can you do?’

“Riveting stuff. I guess it’s better than fighting monsters though.”

“I wouldn’t know, you fought all the monsters for me,” you sassed, as if you were disappointed that you didn’t get to fight anything, when in reality, you know you would have died if you had to go up against one of those crazy villagers. And Leon was taking on half of Spain it felt like, plus those that grew into large monsters with tentacles and big yellow eyes and slime and spikes and goop.

“Well hey, you threw a flash grenade at that Mendez guy for me.”

“I forgot to pull the pin…”

“Yeah, but he looked pretty pissed off when it hit his shin. It was a good throw,”

“I was aiming for his head…” You bit your lip.

Leon sighed and looked down, not knowing how to find the bright side of that little tidbit. A beat passed before you started to chuckle, and so did he. “I know one thing you did that saved my ass.”

“What’s that?” Your tone was humorous, thinking he was going to tease you again. It wasn’t like you did much, especially compared to Leon. Just the fact that he said ‘I know ONE thing you did that saved my ass’ is proof that you obviously didn’t do enough. However, maybe that’s for the best as you definitely would have gotten into even more trouble if you started being reckless.

“Luis’ lab…” he looked down at his hands as he spoke.”I was losing it, I could hardly see, I couldn’t move my body properly. I think I even started hallucinating.” His eyebrows jumped a little as he recalled those moments in his head. It wasn’t very pleasant for you either, but Leon had a lot more of those moments than you did. “I don’t think Ashley and I would have made it if you weren’t there,”

“I think I was just yelling at you the whole time. I was scared.” It was true. You were scared of losing both him and Ashley, and having to find a way off the island on your own. You recalled yelling at Leon while he stumbled through the hallways with an unconscious Ashley in his arms. ‘Hurry the fuck up, Leon!’ and ‘don’t fall down! Get back up! Now!’

“Your yelling got me to keep moving, gave me something to focus on.”

“Well... You’re welcome,” you whispered, looking down at your lap bashfully. Your teeth worried your bottom lip, making it feel a bit tingly and numb. Once you gained the courage to look back up and meet Leon’s gaze — his eyes already on you, watching you intently — you exhaled slowly through your nose and faintly shook your head.

“You’re so annoying,” you whispered.

“Yeah,” he whispered back.

He didn’t look amused, more like... he was agreeing with your statement. He didn’t even look like a kicked puppy, he had just accepted that it was his time to be knocked back down a couple pegs.

His eyes focused on yours while yours focused on his lips. God he was so annoying. And it was even more annoying knowing that he wasn’t doing any of this on purpose. He was just... like that. It was impossible not to like him, not to dream up some fantasy of you and him being closer, more intimate. Impossible not to imagine how soft his lips might be and how his hair might feel between your fingers, and how his rough hands might caress you so gently.

A heart breaker. That’s what he was.

Even Ashley was in the same trap as you — could you even call it a trap when Leon wasn’t aware he had set it, and you and Ashley had both practically willingly jumped into it? You heard her little hints, her little compliments. Calling him dashing and trying to get him to work with her once his mission was over. And you couldn't even blame her! You wanted more time with him as well.

“I wish I never met you,” you whispered, more softly than you had previously been speaking.

“Where would you be without me?” He whispered back just as gently.

His pearly whites faintly peaked out from behind his lips, barely visible but just enough to know that he was fighting off a smile. The corners of your lips twitched upward slightly as you fought off your own smile.

You leaned in.

He didn’t move away.

You leaned in more.

The hint of a smile had left his face and his eyes dropped down to your lips. His own lips parted and his brows twitching- itching to pull together, as he fought with himself. You could see it all — how he wanted to run, how he wanted to pull away, how he was worried and maybe even a little scared. But that wasn’t all, you could also see how he wanted to lean in and give you exactly what you wanted, because he wanted it too.

Conflicting.

You moved in gently and cautiously, your eyelids slowly closing. You weren’t sure if he moved in towards you, or if you managed to get closer to him in your eagerness, but you could feel his breath against your skin a second after your eyes closed. Your noses were the first to touch.

You breathed in, and Leon let out a shaky breath that you couldn’t only feel, but hear as well since you were so close to him. You angled your head to the side slightly, feeling your way out with the tip of your nose as it slowly and gently slid down the side of his nose bridge and poked the inner corner of his cheek.

Your lips ghosted his, feeling him ever so slightly. The softness, the warmth. You shuddered.

Your lips parted, so did his. Your lips pressed softly against his top lip while his pressed against your bottom lip, delighting yourself in how soft his lips were and how inviting they felt. You could only hope you had the same effect on him. He wasn’t pulling away, he leaned in closer, much to your surprise and his hand slowly reached out to lay flat against your knee.

You applied just the tiniest amount of pressure with your lips before pulling back, needing air. Your cheeks were warm, your eyes glossy, and your lips just a little wet from where Leon’s lips had pressed.

You licked your lips, wanting to taste more of him. He did the same. The both of you staring into each other's souls, eyes flickering to each other's lips, then eyes, then back to lips. Not a word was uttered between you two before he leaned forward this time and pressed his lips against yours.

Your heart skipped a beat.

His kiss was just as, if not more, gentle than yours, thinking he would be a little rough or just— anything but so gentle. As if you were more fragile than glass, more fragile than the finest porcelain. Like you were thin paper sat out in the rain, and one little breeze would tear you to pieces.

He kissed you. He wanted this. What was he talking about earlier with his ‘I can’t’? He was doing it right now and you never ever wanted him to stop.

Keeping your lips connected to his, you slowly rose from your seat, hands coming to slide over Leon’s shoulders. He leaned backwards — only his lower body, while his lips refused to leave yours, as he gave you space to sit down with him on the bed. His large, warm hands slid around your waist, pulling you closer and keeping you close.

Your lips parted for a short breath only to close around his bottom lip a second after. But when his lips parted, he didn’t bother gaining more air, he simply worked your mouth open and found your tongue with his own. The sound of wet lip smacking soon filled the room, along with faint panting and pauses for quick breaths — gulping down air when you had the chance.

His hands squeezed your hips and yours fisted the collar of his tight shirt, pulling and not letting him go. A way to ground yourself. Just an hour ago you were so content with the idea of him being too good for you. Knowing that he would never see you the way you saw him. But now here he was, kissing your lips so softly but so desperately.

Your heart was beating so fast inside your chest, trying to explode out of you.

“Leon...” you panted breathily against his mouth, having nothing else to say besides his name. A name you never thought you’d have the opportunity to whimper out like that. You whimpered it once before when you rolled your ankle after running away from a crazy wolf-dog thing, and needed to use Leon as a crutch for a moment, but this was different.

You weren’t sure if you leaned forward or if Leon pulled you closer but he slowly fell back down on the bed, and you followed pursuit. The pillow sunk beneath his head and his hands slid from your hips to your lower back, sending goosebumps all over your skin. You’ll never understand how someone can kick open doors and barrels and people’s heads, and also be so tender and gentle behind closed doors.

He was firm, sturdy as you laid on top of him. You could feel his heart beating against your chest and he could probably feel yours as well. His heart was beating fast, but strong and mighty, and even when he was distracted like this — not alert and ready to defend, you still felt so incredibly safe.

Your tongue pushed its way into his mouth, exploring and massaging where you could. You were thankful that you brushed your teeth when you had a shower earlier, and considering the fact that Leon tasted minty and refreshing, you could only assume he did as well.

His tongue slid against yours, flicking against the roof of your mouth before he pulled back to refill his lungs. You didn’t even have time to share a look before he was back to kissing you.

One hand slid into his sandy blond hair, pulling a sweet and quiet moan from deep within his chest. Your fingers slid against his scalp and teased the roots of his hair, while your other hand laid flat over his pectoral, feeling his muscle and firmness and his strength.

Your movements were slow and steady, like liquid pouring over his skin, there was no rush, there was no danger. It was just you and Leon, sharing kisses and slowly morphing into one being. If love wasn’t this then you didn’t want it.

“Leon... hmmf,” saying his name for no apparent reason other than to just say it. Your robe slipped as you raised your leg and bent your knee, hugging him with your thighs. Leon’s gloved hand slid down to feel the soft, exposed skin of your thigh and you gasped into his mouth. The feeling of his soft fingertips with the scratchy leather sent a heat all throughout your body.

He, of course, didn’t take a robe from you earlier, opting to stay in his filthy clothes since they were more practical for if he needed to defend you and Ashley again. You didn’t think he would have to defend the two of you at all, now that you were off the island and away from the village… but neither you nor Ashley were back home just yet, so he couldn’t afford to take any risks. He was sure determined and that alone made your insides all warm and fuzzy.

His hand gripped your thigh, but his lips stopped moving. You took the opportunity to worship him; to press kisses to the corner of his lips, then two on his cheek — one right beside his ear and the other closer to his jaw as you moved down to his neck.

His skin was so soft, save for the few cuts and scrapes. He lifted his head, giving you more room and you eagerly obliged, leaving soft pecks and wet, open mouthed kisses, little licks and faint nibbles. He hummed in pleasure and it made your whole chest flood with pride.

Pressing a kiss against his adam's apple, you went to move to the other side of his neck, wanting to give his right side equal treatment, but he turned his head. You weren’t sure if he was trying to stop you or not, so you pulled back just to make sure he was okay.

He looked perfectly fine. His cheeks were a soft shade of red that you would now commit to memory for the rest of your life– probably your new favorite color.. His eyes were half lidded and a little glossy, making the different shades of blue in his irises shine brightly even in the darkly lit room. It was impossible to have a fear of drowning when you looked into them.

Though he wasn’t looking at you.

His head was turned to the side, looking over at Ashley who was still sleeping like a rock. Her lips were parted and she breathed heavily, close to snoring but not quite.

It was only when you shifted your body a little, wanting to back off a bit in case he was uncomfortable, that you felt your effect on him. Your thigh felt his excitement, he pursed his lips together and closed his eyes for a moment to focus on his breathing.

Was this really happening?

“She won’t wake up,” you whispered to him and his eyes opened, looking cautiously into your eyes, then back to Ashley, then back to you one final time. You wanted him, and he wanted you, and you had both survived the horrors you encountered over the last few days. You both deserved a break. You both deserved this.

His brow furrowed knitting together tightly. Though the slight upward angle in his brows made him look like a wounded puppy.

“My job isn’t done yet,” he swallowed, his adam’s apple bobbing. “I need to stay focused.”

You deflated.

“Right.” You nodded once and crawled off of him. Maybe it was for the best, you didn’t want to go too far with him after knowing him for only 48 hours. Though going through copious amounts of trauma together did make for a great bonding experience and therefore it felt like you had known him for months.

You sat on your ankles, hands on your knees. Your robe was open just enough to show your legs but the rest of you was covered. One hand left your knee to wipe your swollen and wet lips, basically wiping away Leon’s kiss, before you tucked your hair behind your ear.

You couldn’t tear your eyes away from your lap, feeling embarrassed and maybe even a little ashamed. Were you wrong to think Leon was into it? Into you? It definitely felt like he was, but maybe he snapped out of it once he realized you weren’t that lady in the red dress and the high heels.

As if he could sense your downward spiral, Leon’s hand found yours, the one still resting on your knee, and squeezed it reassuringly. “But I can… stay here?”

You finally looked up and met his ocean blue eyes. He had sat up somewhat, his back resting against the headboard of the bed. He looked just as unsure and nervous as you did. He obviously didn’t have much experience with this sort of stuff, which only made him even more endearing. The poor guy just fought monsters for a living and never had time to slow down and relax.

“While you fall asleep,” he added gently. He wanted to stay with you? In bed? Did that mean he wasn’t just using work as an excuse to not go further with you? He really did just want to stay alert and not have any distractions while the president's daughter was in his care.

“If you want?” He pressed one more time. He was giving you big, puppy dog eyes— knowing him, it was unintentional too. Even if you didn’t want him to stay with you, there was no way you could refuse him when he gave you that face. But you did want him to stay of course.

You didn’t need to say so.

You curled up beside him, sliding your body under the covers. Leon didn’t smell great, but he was at least clean enough— his clothes weren’t covered in blood and dirt but the smell lingered a bit. You weren’t sure if his sweat or the seawater from the jetski ride over was what rid his tight shirt of all the muck. Or maybe he washed them in the shower and dried them quickly afterwards. That would be nice.

Your hand splayed over his chest, feeling his heartbeat. Your nose pressed against his ribs, finding an odd sense of comfort in the smell that lingered. It was Leon after all, it was proof he was there with you, reminding you you were safe even when you had your eyes closed.

His arm was around your neck, letting you use his bicep as a pillow. His heart was beating rather fast as you snuggled into his side but after a few minutes it slowed back down and fell in tune with the steady rise and fall of his chest. Leon turned his head and pressed his lips against your forehead, letting them linger for a moment. And his arm, the one you weren’t laying on, moved over towards you, his hand stroking through your hair.

Cocooned in Mr. Leon S. Kennedy’s arms.

“Get some sleep. I’ll look after you.”

And there go your plans to stay awake with him.

—————————————————————

After waking up in Leon’s arms, you got up and did your morning ritual with Ashley. Breakfast, brushing your teeth, brushing your hair, getting dressed, etc. Leon stood by the door rushing you both as it got close to 9am. A tired but teasing “come on, ladies” came from him as he ushered you both out the door.

Ashley was the first to go home. Being the president's daughter and all. You said your goodbyes to her in the car, opting to not go into the big building with all the security guards. Leon escorted her back to her father — after you and Ashley exchanged emails of course, and by the time she had been delivered home safely, it was already dinner time. The flight from Spain to America chewed up a few hours.

You and Leon didn’t really have a chance to talk when Ashley was around. Though you thought that once it was just the two of you, he might mention something from last night or maybe even be a little more touchy feely. A hand on your thigh while he drove or maybe he would reach for your hand. Maybe press a kiss to the back of your palm once in a while or lean over to kiss your cheek at every stop sign and red light.

He didn’t do any of that.

He barely spoke. You barely spoke. Maybe it was because these were your final moments with him, that you didn’t know what to say or how to act or what to do. How do you say goodbye to someone who saved your life time and time again? How do you just watch him leave without somehow repaying him? Why did he have to leave at all? Why did you have to go back home?

You just did. He just did. It just had to be like this.

Finally once you arrived at your home, Leon got out of the car first, coming around to let you out of the passenger side like a gentleman. You smiled and stepped out, awkwardly hugging yourself as you walked with him to the front door.

This was it wasn’t it? The final goodbye.

You bent down to flip over the corner of the welcome mat, picking up your spare house key and unlocking the door. You hadn’t been home in weeks. Everything was dark and dusty and that homey scent had faded away until you barely recognised where you were.

The door was open but you were yet to step inside. You turned to face Leon first, your hand gripping the door handle tightly until your knuckles turned white.

“…Do you... wanna come in?” You asked hopefully, just wanting to spend more time with him, wanting to feel safe for just a few minutes longer. You wouldn’t be able to feel safe once he walked away. And that foolish little part inside you hoped you could pick up where you left off last night.

But Leon pulled a face. Not out of disgust or hatred or anything bad, he was just… his face was saying ‘no.’ The awkward smile that wasn’t really a smile, more like a ‘man, I’m about to hurt your feelings even though I don’t want to,’ smile.

“I guess not, huh?” You looked down and nodded distantly, realising that this really was goodbye then. Part of you wanted to be angry, for everything that had happened last night, for the feelings you had developed. However, Leon’s ocean blue eyes and his silly floppy hair with those pink, kissable lips... how could you be mad at that?

“It’s been a long couple of days. I should get home.”

“No, yeah. Of course,” you awkwardly shuffled on your feet, avoiding eye contact.

“I’ll probably have another mission lined up for me when I get back to work.” Leon’s voice was quiet and his shoulders were tense. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking or feeling but he definitely didn’t look comfortable.

“Yeah.” You nodded slowly, keeping your gaze on your shoes that inched closer towards the inside of your home, wanting to run away and hide.

One beat passed. A sigh left both of you at the same time.

“I’ll see you ‘round, (Y/N)...” you blinked. He was leaving already? Just like that? You finally looked up to meet his eyes, wanting a look at those pools of blue one more time... but he had already turned around and started walking away. He was clearly eager to get away from you, eager to get home and back into his work.

You wouldn't cry over someone you couldn't have...

“Goodbye, Leon.”

You stepped inside your home and closed the door behind yourself.

[insertsparkleshere]

Five vs One

Summary: Five times you and Rosa kissed for show, and one time it was for real.

Word Count: 2,586

Pronouns: Implied she/her/hers

Published: 12/28/2022

Author's Note: My obsession with Rosa Diaz continues

Trigger Warnings: Some swearing, mentions of drugs, general police shit

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Stakeout

You've been friends with Rosa for years. Ever since you transferred to the 99, she's been your partner. You work most of your cases together, you're the only member of the 99 that's actually been to her apartment, and you would say that you know her pretty well.

The silence is comfortable as you sit in the car. The two of you are on stakeout, trying to catch some poor drug dealer.

You yawn.

"You good?"

"Tired. I can't believe we have another hour of this shit."

"You want me to grab you a coffee? I'll buy."

"I won't say no to that."

Rosa comes back ten minutes later with your usual order, handing it to you as she slides into the driver's seat. "Anything new? Or is he still waiting for the buyer?"

"Still waiting, but I think he's getting suspicious. He saw me in the car, but I pulled out my phone and pretended I was calling someone, so I don't think he made me."

"Good."

You take a sip of your drink, once again lapsing into comfortable silence. The drug dealer (you can't remember his name) looks over at you again. He starts walking over to the car.

"Shit." You look at Rosa. "He made us."

"No, he didn't."

"What-?"

You haven't even finished getting the word out when Rosa pulls you forward into a kiss.

"Go with it," She says against you, but you decided to do that the moment it happened.

"Yep, doing that." You break away from her, face flushed, and look over at the dealer. "He went back."

"Good."

You both sit back into your respective seats. You're freaking out, but you're trying not to show it.

"Sorry. It was the only thing I could think of."

"It's fine."

2. Operation: Broken Feather

"Commence Operation: Broken Feather."

And with those words, everyone's off to their varying positions. And yet, nothing works. Charles spills his coffee, but the Vulture just wipes it off. Rosa flirts with him (you see red), but he moves on. For once, he's not interested.

"I can't believe I'm gonna do this." You march over to Rosa, determined and praying that Jake can get the confession soon. "No time to explain, come on."

You take Rosa through a back way. You stop where you know the Vulture will come out of the stairwell he took to get from the bathroom to the squad's floor. "Trust me?"

"Yeah."

You grab Rosa, pulling her into a kiss just as the Vulture comes out of the door.

"Woah!"

He stops for a few moments, staring, then you hear his footsteps recede.

"Damnit!" You say, pulling away once you're sure he's gone. "I really thought that was going to work."

"Uh...Yeah."

"Sorry. Only thing I could think of to stop him."

"It's fine."

3. Tactical Village

"How come you're so mad at Boyle?" You ask, creeping down the hallway. Charles is a few feet ahead of you, but you're careful. Quiet.

"He didn't invite me to his wedding."

"You can be my plus one."

"If he didn't invite me, that means he doesn't want me there."

"I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for all of this. Just talk to him."

Rosa wrinkles her nose.

"Yeah, I know, feelings are for losers. But give it a try, okay?"

"Fine."

You hear something up ahead. Charles ducks through a side door, but there's nowhere for you and Rosa to hide.

"I have no clue if this is going to work," Rosa says, "but I need you to trust me."

"You know I do."

"I'm going to kiss you. When the perps come through, shoot them."

"Got it. You know we're being watched, right?"

"Yeah."

She presses her lips against yours, and you melt into the kiss like you always do.

Part of you wishes that you could do this more often, but you know that's not possible.

You hear footsteps, drawing closer.

"Woah. Uh, sorry."

You pull away, gun already in hand. You shoot one guy, and Rosa shoots the other. Green paint splatters across their chests.

"Don't be." You say. "It was just a distraction."

4. The Wedding

"We have a problem," Amy says.

"What's wrong?" You ask, pausing in your frosting of Rosa's wedding cake.

"Rosa's drunk."

"How?"

"Bellinis."

"I got it." You set your frosting bag down, wipe your hands on your apron, and set off for the small room Rosa's hunkered in.

"(Y/N)!" She slurs. "I'm getting married."

"Yes, you are. Which you need to be sober for. Come on, let's get you some water."

"No." She drags out the word, but you stand your ground.

"Rosa, you need to be sober to get married."

"Do I?"

"Yes." You sit down across from her at the table.

"You should have a drink."

"Absolutely not."

"You're so wound up! Why are you so stressed?"

"Because your wedding is today, Rosa, and you're currently drunk off of champagne, of all things. I mean, really, it's half bubbles."

"Yeah, but you shouldn't be stressed. This isn't your wedding."

"No, it's not. Which is why I'm going to drink my way through the ceremony and reception, but not while I am trying to make you a wedding cake."

"Huh?"

"I'm trying to make your wedding cake, Rosa."

"No, the other part."

"Ah, right. I am going to drink my way through the ceremony and reception."

"Why?"

"Because that's what you do at a wedding."

"No." Rosa gasps dramatically. "Is it because we've kissed?"

"What? No!"

"It is." Her eyes go wide. "Do you like me?"

"No, Rosa, I don't."

You hate lying to her.

She surges forward, kissing you hard.

"What about now?" She asks when she pulls back.

"Now...I need a bellini."

5. Nutriboom

"Why does this always happen?" You duck behind a door, praying the person goes away. "Seriously, every time!"

"It's comical." Rosa agrees, but she kisses you anyway.

+1. Show Me Going

“(Y/L/N), can I speak with you in my office?”

You jump. “Sorry. Startled me. Yeah, sure.” You stand and follow Holt into his office. “What’s up?”

“I wanted to ask how you’re doing. I know that you and Rosa are close, so you’re more likely to be particularly affected, what with her current involvement in the Brooklyn Heights shooting."

“Captain, I’ve been in love with Rosa Diaz for the last four years.” Your voice shakes a little, but you smile. “If I couldn’t take a little danger, I’d have broken a long time ago.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. I’m okay. Honestly, I’m more worried about the rest of the squad.” You look back and see Charles and Jake talking, while Terry gets his blood pressure checked. “Seriously, Boyle’s got that vein popping out in his forehead. You know the one, when he gets stressed?” Holt’s phone rings. “I’ll let you get that.”

You leave just in time to see Charles stand. “Shots fired. Shots fired!”

“What?” Jake exclaims.

“Is anybody hurt?” Terry asks.

“I don’t know.”

“Oh, man.”

“And, you’re BP’s at 290. Oh, 350. You broke the machine.” The guy next to Terry's desk says.

“Alright, screw this.” Jake stands and storms into Holt’s office. “There were shots fired.”

“I just got off the phone. There are two officers down.”

You run to the nearest trashcan, convinced you’re going to puke, but then you hear, “Neither one of them is Diaz,” and suddenly, you’re fine.

Holt shuts his door. You don't hear the rest of his conversation, instead sitting down at your desk. It's right across from Rosa's, a fact that you desperately try to ignore. You're trembling, but otherwise normal, so you take a breath and try to focus on paperwork. You put your headphones on, despite the ban against them, and blare your music as loud as you can in an attempt to drown out your thoughts.

A few songs later, someone taps you on the shoulder. You practically jump out of your skin, but when you turn around, you see Jake. “God, dude, don’t sneak up on me like that!”

“I got pizza. Come grab a slice.”

You shake your head. “Not really hungry.”

“Come on, eat. You haven’t had anything all day.”

“Fine.”

You stand up and grab a slice.

“Peralta, why are you back so soon?” Holt asks.

“Because I wanted to do something.” Jake turns back. “Hey, guys. How’re you holding up?"

“I mean, not great, but I know you really don’t want to talk about it,” Charles says.

“No. We should talk about it. I’m really scared for Rosa.”

“Yeah.” You say quietly. “I’m terrified that she’s gonna die and I’ll never actually have told her the truth.”

“Me, too.” Terry says. “I mean, the her dying part. It keeps making me think about my kids. How do I deal with the fact that every day I leave for work, I might not come home?”

“Man, I don’t even know, Terry. I don’t have kids yet, but I know you love them. And I feel like that’s all you can really do, right? I mean, now that I'm getting married, I keep thinking if something happens to me, it'll actually affect someone else.”

“I'd get over it eventually, after a lot of therapy.”

“I was more talking about Amy, but yes, you too, Charles.”

You all sigh.

“Hey, look at that. 130 over 80.” The guy next to Terry says. “Back to normal. I can get out of your hair now.”

“Nice. Told you, Andrew. Terry’s in tiptop. Thanks, Jake.”

“Yeah.” You say, nodding.

Jake turns to talk to Holt, and Charles’s phone goes off. “Guys!” He says. “Guys, guys, guys. They just took both shooters into custody. Officers got injured in the action. They don’t say how many.”

“Call Diaz. Get her cell.” Terry says.

Jake grabs his phone. “Damn it. It’s still just going to voicemail.”

“Let me try.”

Straight to voicemail.

“Her phone’s gotta be off, but I’ll try again.” You say. “She’s always picked up when I’ve called.”

“Adorable.” You glare at Jake. “Right, not the time. Just…glad that whole thing’s over.”

“For now.” You mutter.

Fifty minutes (or a lifetime, you aren't completely sure) later, Holt comes out of his office. He’d spent ages on the phone, trying to get in contact with someone who could give him the names of the injured officers.

“Okay.” He says. “I don’t have the names of the injured officers,” You swear internally, “but if Diaz is unharmed, she should be contacting us shortly. Or, if her phone is dead, perhaps she’ll be walking out of the elevator at any moment.”

Just then, the elevator dings. Your head snaps towards the doors.

They open…revealing Scully.

“Come on, Scully!”

“You can’t be doing stuff like that, man!”

“Fuck you!”

“I was just making a copy downstairs.”

“Yeah, well, next time, think.” Jake says.

“About what?”

“I don’t know!”

“Okay, Jake. Come on, man. Go easy on him.”

“Diaz!” Holt says, surprised.

“Rosa!” You and Jake say at the same time.

“You’re okay! Where’d you come from?” Jake asks.

“Felt like walking, so I took the stairs. Also, I thought it’d be funny to mess with you guys.”

“Rosa, you know I hate pranks.”

“You love pranks.”

“I do. I really do.” Jake hugs her tightly. “You did it so good.

“Were you guys worried about me or something?”

“No.” He says.

“I plead the fifth.” You put in, holding yourself back from running to her.

“So, what happened? Did they shoot at you?” Terry says. “Were you in the thick of it?”

“It’s been a really tough day. I just want to go get a beer. I don’t feel like getting into it.”

“Are you sure? Because the journey I went on today taught me that sometimes it’s best to talk about things-”

“Jake.”

“Right. It was a stupid idea. And Holt told me to do it, so. Let’s just go get a drink and sit in total silence.”

“Perfect. First, I gotta go to the can.”

“Actually, you might want to go check out the ladies’ room up here.” You turn at the sound of Gina’s voice. “Hey, Rosa, it’s me, Gina Linetti. Welcome back. Me and Amy made a little surprise for you, and I think you’re gonna like it very, very much. Come on, girl.”

You follow Gina and Rosa into the bathroom. You feel like if you don’t have your eyes on Rosa, she’ll disappear.

Also, you want to see how the bathroom turned out.

“Ta-da!” Gina says.

“You made it sound like you fixed the toilet.” Rosa says dryly.

“Yeah, I thought maybe Amy would’ve pulled something together in the two minutes I stepped outside.”

“Hey, Gina! Look what I stole from the Barnes and…Oh, my God, Rosa! I’m so happy to see you!” Amy runs forward, dropping the toilet seat she’s holding to hug Rosa.

“Wait, are you covered in toilet water?”

“Yes, big-time. But this is happening.”

“Ugh. Fine.”

“Kinda feel like I’m lurking.”

“Gina, get in here.”

“Yay!”

You hesitate.

“(Y/N), you too.”

You grin, rushing forward to hug the three of them.

“Do you mind if I come to Shaw’s?” You ask, once you're out of the bathroom and Amy and Gina are gone.

“Whole squad’s going. Let me go to bathroom, and I’ll drive you.” Rosa offers.

“You don’t have to-”

“You walk to work.”

“Fine.” You smile slightly, and go upstairs to grab your stuff from your desk. You meet her in front of the bathrooms, and follow her out to the parking structure. When you’re sure that you’re alone, you look at the ground. “You know, if you’d died, I’d have been so pissed.”

“Really?”

“I would’ve brought you back so I could kill you again.”

“Didn’t think you cared that much.”

“Of course, I care that much. You’re my partner. Half my cases, I work with you. Can’t have you dying on me, can I?”

Rosa doesn’t say anything.

“Seriously, though, you scared the shit out of me. Didn’t want to say anything in the precinct, I know you don’t like the mushy stuff.”

“Thanks.”

You stop in front of her bike.

“Do you really care that much?” She asks, giving you pause.

“What do you mean? Of course, I care. I don’t know if anyone told you, but I was close to a nervous collapse today.”

“Why?”

You stare at her, bewildered. “Why do you think?”

“We’re friends, but-”

“Rosa, I’ve…” You close your eyes. “Never mind. Let’s just go to Shaw’s, okay?”

“No. What were you going to say?”

“It’s nothing.”

Her voice drops. “It’s not nothing.”

“Rosa, trust me, it doesn’t matter.”

“No, it does matter. If you have something to say-”

“I told you it’s nothing!”

There’s a brief pause. You could cut the tension with whatever knife Rosa probably has in her pocket.

And then she lurches forward, and you don’t have time to say anything before she kisses you, hard.

You freeze, for a split second, and it’s enough that Rosa pulls back. You don’t let her go far, though, dragging her back to you. Butterflies erupt in your stomach.

She bites your lower lip, and you gasp.

“You know,” you say, between kisses, “I’ve been waiting four years for this. I mean...Except for all the fake ones.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Just…didn’t think it would happen."

“I’m glad I made the first move then.”

“Me, too."

You never do make it to Shaw’s.

[shortpplfedup]

Only Friends Character Rankings Pre-Air

Jojo, Ninew, Ninepinta and Vivienne have now presented their stable of hoes to us, y'all have chosen your fighters, and I am gnawing on concrete in anticipation of August 12. Since I'm gonna be doing weekly character rankings, I wanted to set up a pre-air Clown Checkpoint so I can look back later and see how wrong I was. Until that YouTube premiere countdown hits zero, we know exactly nothing, but I'm ready to predict whose gay wrongs I will most support! Here we go!

1. Nick

I just want you to love only me!

Audience ranking: 6

Ever since Mark Pakin showed up in that pilot trailer scheming and sex-taping, Nick has been MY DUDE. I want him to be the most manclown character of all time. I want him to be DESPERATE AND PATHETIC for Boston's dick. ANSWER EVERY BOOTY CALL NICK, I BELIEVE IN YOU. HE WANTS YOU TO DO A THREESOME? NO PROBLEM, WHATEVER YOU WANT BABE. I want Nick to call his bestie (Sand?) crying because Boston came over at 3:02 a.m. and left at 4:37 a.m. and 15 minutes of that was him taking a post-coital shower. I want crying and begging and clinging and devious acts. Khun Pakin has the chops to make my dreams come alive, make it happen boo!

2. Mew

My type is pretty simple. I'm not a picky kind of guy.

Audience ranking: 4

Right up until time of posting I thought my #2 seed would be Boston, but something is telling me that when it comes to manipulation and making grown men cry, Mew will emerge the champion. Something in this butter-wouldn't-melt expression is telling me this man is the true demon from hell whereas Boston is merely a top-tier-yet-still-garden-variety slut. Him shit-kicking Boston into the pool and then jumping in himself to finish the job is the kinda deranged shit I respect immensely. Kill them all Mew. You deserve.

3. Boston

You should be glad to be my favourite.

Audience ranking: 5

I may have called this man a garden variety slut, but I love a good slut though! Especially one who will lend his toys to help out a friend. And then almost instantly regret it. And then cause chaos and problems for himself as a result. And then make it everybody else's chaos and problems. Basically, I expect Boston's job to be throwing hole around Bangkok and ruining lives, and I expect him to do it WELL, and I expect him to do it in the sluttiest rent boy outfits I've ever seen.

4. Ray

You think my life will be better with you? It's only fucking going down to hell.

Audience ranking: 3

Speaking of chaos and problems, OUR BI DISASTER IS HERE GUYS! Bisexual? Bipolar? Why not both? The trailer is letting us know from jump that Ray is A Mess With Money and happy to use that money to buy himself some company, but also not able to keep those lines from getting blurred. I’m expecting this character to make me fall in love with him but also want to strangle him, Teh Krittikorn Saetun-style, so expect this ranking to go up until he is somehow my fave.

5. Sand

Friends don't charge friends. Besides, you should save your money for a shrink.

Audience ranking: 2

First Kanaphan’s job at GMMTV is to rip our hearts out roughly twice a year, and he’s right on schedule. It seems like Sand never learned not to fall for poor little rich boys, so we will all have to suffer with him. Honestly his ranking is this low right now because I see these guitars and microphones and I want no part of them. There is a short list of GMMTV boys allowed to sing at me and as much as I love First he is not on it. Ditch the microphone and bring back the baseball bat bb, I’m ready to see you bust some heads, kneecaps, car windows, whatever in pursuit of your love.

6. Top

When I take aim, I never miss.

Audience ranking: 7

Ah yes, the hoe-turned-seeming-housewife who’s actually still hoeing. The village bike. The community top. Boston basically turns him out and he’s not only fine with it, he falls for the john. Delicious. I desire his ruin like I’ve desired nothing before in media.

7. Everybody we don’t know nothing about yet (Yo, Nam/Syrup, Nes, Lesbian!Nonnie, A Wild Papang, various and assorted surprise guests I’m pretty sure we’re getting)

Friends don't do this to each other.

Audience ranking: 1 (combined score)

We await the tea on all the side characters, but the casting is superb, and I’m ready to see how high in the rankings they can climb.

LET THE MESS COMMENCE!

[katyspersonal]

If you were curious, this song basically sums up everything of why I find Radagon sympathetic (timeline being sometime after the Twins were born)

(Attaching Youtube one with the lyrics just in case)

This is a beautiful song! And no, I agree with your vision that Radagon was not unfeeling nor "divorce selfie" meme when he left Rennala and his children! It is really funny to do all the divorce jokes and exaggerate how much of a bitch he can be for the comedic effect, I love this kind of cruel humour! xD

But in the end, Rennala did charm him enough to opt out for marriage and erasing his war crimes in Liurnia from the collective memory, instead of conquering the continent and erasing Carians instead, right? 🤔 He most likely can and did love her and his children, but he is bound with the problems of divinity as much as Marika if not more, right? Marika is just the latest carrier of Elden Ring, so, Greater Will's vision and Golden Order is just her iteration of it, when previously it were Ancient Dragons!

^^^ @izunias-meme-hole I am bringing your ask to answer here too because I went on this topic's territory here! :p

But Radagon didn't make the Golden Order "manifest" like this, he is Golden Order! His Japanese title is literally 黄金律, ラダゴン ((the) Golden Order, Radagon). His existence is a combination of the divinity and power Marika was given, where Two Fingers were guiding her and her own biases, principles and other things that give Golden Order its "current imperfection"! Let alone the fact that Marika is the dominant alter!

They were both dealing with "caged divinity"! But whereas Marika had the courage to kill herself (or get as close to it as possible, leaving it to Hewg and whoever he helps to maybe find the way to finish this), Radagon clearly liked living more :p And it is hard to blame him because whereas long long time ago Marika was just a traumatised Shaman woman that wished to make a better world where what happened to her village could not happen again, Radagon never existed as such! The divinity and this "better world" is all there was to him!

^^^ All three Mending Runes we get change the Golden Order, and it is no wonder that he is fighting us! At the first glance you'd think it makes no sense; why, if we just want to fix it? Something he himself wanted to do?

But like.. this is the point. :p He is like this because Golden Order is like this. It is not that he is protecting his power and the right to keep oppressing this or that kind of folks like any real world corrupt authority would! He goes beyond, a blend of a 'person' and of a 'concept', and is protecting his existence! Of course he doesn't want to be mended by someone except himself, because then it won't be HIM anymore! It is not that Those Who Live in Death should be condemned or anything- he probably doesn't even have an idea they exist since they appeared after Shattering! It is that Golden Order exists because Death was sealed, and he would get theseus-ship'd if that (or anything else) was changed! As if a law of nature was given the sentence and self-comprehension! I mean it: you won't wish on your worst enemy to be in Marika's OR in his situation!

Greater Will would be content with any Order, it simply created life but wants it to have a coherent form as opposed to primordial chaos!

And it seems like it abandoned everyone over Elden Ring being shattered! I pictured it as Marika shattering the "phone" between the world and itself, but it could've also been a gradual process! Like it seeing that no matter what the new Order doesn't rise from the ruins, nor the former one gets fixed. Maybe it just said "well THIS attempt at creating life with actual rules was a failure, I'll go try again, bye you weeaboo shits" fsdhfdsh The theory about us being an experiment, and a failed one at that that was abandoned by god/gods/aliens/whatever lingers somewhere amongst humanity, and here you can see it manifest.

Nonetheless 1) you'd expect the Two Fingers, its grandchild, to still remember its wishes and wish the same thing and 2) Greater Will possibly was still there long before the Shattering to do this:

I fucking love the "Sorry Rennala, I found someone better than you: myself" jokes and use them at any given chance fhhds But I am just saying, on the serious note, I do not actually think this IS what happened :p. If anything, Marika would be the one to want to hold the Golden Order as close to herself as possible, so it would be kept pure and in contact with the Greater Will like herself! I am considering the idea that she saw something similar to Goldmask's insight, except instead of drastically removing the 'person' from equation (at the time!) she wanted it to be "closer to the stars" for the lack of better term! Back then, maybe it looked like that way, it would never go corrupt, never fail her. After all, regrets and decision to destroy it only came after Godwyn was killed!

And in both cases, it was someone else who wanted Radagon to leave, and nothing really suggests that he was happy or indifferent doing so! He remade the sword Rennala gifted to him to symbolise the change, but nothing says which emotions were behind that process! It could've been any of them, and all interpretations are fair! He had duty to manifest the way things worked even more so than Marika, who at least GOT to live a normal human life long ago, but it doesn't mean he didn't care about how much pain he caused to Rennala in following that duty! On the other hand, bitter irony is that Radagon actually got to live a normal life - with Rennala and the kids! And just like Marika, he experienced leaving it behind to do "bigger" things. It is sad that the cruelty of caged divinity repeated even in her other self! 🤔

____________________

I've side-tracked in validating a more sympathetic reading of him (I just have a dark, immature humour that sometimes poisons my perception of the character on the first glance XD)! There is sadness about him. His one REAL sin is lacking the same courage Marika had, to die so the new, better era begins, but even then this "choice" is made for him when Elden Beast takes his motionless body as its weapon! The territorial aggressions, as well as principles of the Golden Order, are "fault" of Marika's personality as a 'god no better than humans' (which is FAIR), Two Fingers that gave her ideas via broken telephone, and maybe Greater Will in some capacity! "The roots were rotten", so Radagon could also only be rotten!

+ I also think that Radagon came into existence because Marika got cursed during the War with the Giants ( x )! Think of one breaking in two as "defence mechanism", because losing the God itself could not be afforded, however cursing the Order of this God was "fair game"! Marika is a tool of Greater Will to make the order, any order, so the tool could not be ruined yet the tool's creation (the Order) could! So, what if now it is only 90% perfect? Remnants of it are Ulcerated Tree Spirits breathing fire, despite being just malformed Minor Erdtrees! I have a theory that the same happened with Trina, as Miquella came into contact with Frenzied Flame but losing an Empyrean could not be afforded! That comes from the fact this sleep power is conceptual opposite of FF, as well as Torrent having burnt marks, his summon ring already having its part 'drained', him fearing the Abyssal Woods and Miquella being shown to ride in him the Shadow Realm before! It is a long one but you can see where I am going with this!

[jolieblack]

Jolie’s thoughts on

Shoscombe Old Place (Sherlock & Co. podcast)

Good call shifting the environment away from the way too similar horse racing scenario of Silver Blaze.

Thank you also, Joel, for letting our boys go on a holiday. It’s not what I imagined when I said I wanted Consequences after Dancing Men, but it works! And I find it telling that Sherlock especially seems to have offered no resistance to the plan. Seriously, S & J camping by the river (and Sherlock going fishing, because of course he would!) for real and not just as a blind (like in ACD’s story) filled me with happiness and serenity.

I was not prepared at all to learn so much about John's childhood and family circumstances. "Made and then broken in the Army and subsequently fixed at 221B Baker Street", yes, that is the John Watson that we know and love in any universe. 😭

I'm so glad he still has a refuge in his old town now, and I love that Sherlock gets invited totally as a matter of course. I so heard him on the "weird feeling when a place you used to call home doesn’t feel like home anymore", too.

I'm also left wondering a LOT whether John’s canonical unhappy alcoholic brother (also Henry/Harry, like the father?) from Sign of Four exists in this universe. If yes, there should be traces of him in the old family home for Sherlock to deduce… Unless of course he’s a half brother or something who never lived there (from John's dad's earlier marriage or relationship, possibly?). Or maybe the traces are there and Sherlock just never said a thing, and only will later…

I also wasn't expecting John to run into his famous so-far-nameless ex! I found myself hoping that they wouldn’t go down the tropey route of the Crazy Evil Ex. When John called Carrie "evil" when they were trapped in the crypt, that really didn’t seem accurate. But John was being so realistically cranky about everything to do with Carrie, I really felt for him.

Sherlock was being such a sweetie throughout, especially at the start. Doing small talk with the neighbour, NOT pointing out that John rambles exactly as bad as his mum sometimes, not wanting him to have to call his ex in person, repeating over and over that they’re in a beautiful place with good beer and he’s really enjoying himself… Calling John invaluable… Feeling a little bad about recklessly leading them both into danger in Dancing Men, perhaps (not that John didn’t follow willingly and without question)? Or just being happy that he and John are still alive and still around and evidently didn’t fall out over the Dancing Men business, either?

"I'm a big boy. I can do it." - "Would you like me to call her?" - "Yes, please." - "What’s wrong?" - "Poor signal in this village." - "I’m blocked, aren’t I." My heart 🥹 How I love a protective Sherlock.

And our boys getting philosophical in ancient sacred buildings at night is almost a tradition by now. I love it when they do that. The River Thames analogy was so intriguing, too. Who would have thought that Sherlock could be such a poet?

"A sea? A lake? A waterfall?" [10 seconds later] "Shoutout to Professor James Moriarty, who is listening intently to every word." AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!! 😱😱😱 That was the creepiest moment ever and John was so right to lose his shit.

How close are we to Reichenbach? We might be there by August. Or Joel might be pulling all our legs.

Whatever it may be, don’t deny yourself the pleasure of looking at this absolutely beautiful art by @paperleef !

Oh and then of course there was a case as well, but it hardly seemed to matter for most of the story. No surprises there for the connoisseurs of ACD’s original stories, either.

I’m glad that they did not go down the Crazy Evil Ex route with Carrie after all. I was a little narratively underwhelmed by how John’s dynamic with Carrie and its potential for conflict just fizzled out. But thumbs up for realism there. They’ve both moved on and that’s it. Like so often in RL. And didn’t we all love the fact that John now considers Baker Street his home, Sherlock & Mariana his family and the Sh & Co project his future.

I also didn’t expect Part 3 to turn into an anti-classism manifesto, but it does make sense, especially seeing how the matter bugs John all the time, too. Check out this great meta by @comicgeekery on the matter!

I would also like to contest Mr Emory’s ideas about the founding date of the Adidas shoe brand, but that’s just a tiny detail.

Sherlock: "John Hamish Watson!" - John: "Don’t Hamish me!" 😂 - Wasn’t aware that’s a verb, but apparently it is!

The car chase scene/river rescue scene was so good I literally forgot this was just audio. Also, Sherlock and John diving in a lake together to get Robert out was just… so touching. And so cool. (I think I’m mostly in love with how Sherlock switched immediately from "Watson, get out of there" to "OK, I’m going right in there with you".) And did you all notice we got another "John"? It’s still being saved for special moments. 🥰

Dear Joe, nobody who dies on duty on a peacekeeping mission gets a cheap place in heaven in my opinion. But then, if Harry Watson was anywhere as modest and laid-back as his son is, and something tells me that he must have been, he probably took a cheap place on purpose, not to be a pain, and when an angel came up and wanted to guide him closer to the hero places, he was just, "nah, mate, I'm good here".

Also, Sherlock packing their things before the case was even wrapped up, to make sure John would find it easier to go back home to London, rather than lingering and questioning his life choices, was so sweet again.

"You’re stressed, any you’re lashing out at those you love (!). You’re losing your mind. You spoke to a river!" - "And you put a dog in a bag!" - Possibly one of my favourite ever closing scenes of this show. (Treat yourselves to this lovely observation by @itsnobodysproblem , please!)

[unclejellyfish]

I've been thinking about the Flight Anthology graphic novels and one particular story has lived in my head rent free for years. It was written and drawn by Amy Kim Kibuishi in Flight Volume 4, in 2007.

On a distant island lives a young fisherwoman named Sandy Balgan, who just wants to share the glory of fish produce with people who rely on the local Clam merchant Gladys Perna.

Sandy's luck takes a turn when she encounters a giant fish. After a fierce fight, the girl harpoons the sea beast and realizes she can be somebody now.

News of the fiery young lady's catch spreads, and the people of the island are eager to try something new after a generation of Perna's clams.

Of course, old Gladys isn't gonna be upstaged by the new generation, so she ups her game, and the competition gets ugly.

And ugly in more ways than one, as the two women become so obsessed with outdoing each other they gradually change, transformed by their own obsession.

Sandy and Gladys become monstrous giant versions of the sea life they used for their livelihood. The village becomes divided into factions of who prefers what to eat. It turns violent quickly.

But shit really goes down when Sandy hits one of Perna's customers, prompting the two mer-monsters into a bloody brawl that takes them into the coastline itself.

Just when it seems Sandy has murdered her rival, Gladys rips back up and the two she beasts bloodily brawl in a fight that seemingly ends in their deaths. They sink to the depths of the sea they relied on all their lives.

And yet this isn't the end. At least not for the island. Just as the islanders despair over both their food supplies gone, one little girl discovers a new form of produce: Sugar cane.

And so the villagers move on, no longer torn between two merchants turned monsters, and sweets and baked goods become their biggest export.

It's kind of odd how dissonant this ending feels. On one hand the villagers have a prosperous and happier future. On the other two woman have been destroyed in a horrifying fashion. Poor Sandy Balgan literally transformed into a monster out of desperation and envy, while Gladys Perna became embroiled in a petty competition with the younger generation and ultimately both of them died pointlessly, their dreams amounting to nothing. It might be an allegory of how capitalism destroys one's mind and body in the pursuit of false dreams, yet it isn't treated as a tragedy.

Either way, it's a creatively morbid fable. Bonus fact, the artist, Amy Kim Kibuishi, actually adapted the Goosebumps book, Deep Trouble into a graphic novel. It's pretty wild how the "horror" series tale is leagues more lighthearted than this one-shot tale. I mean which would you guess is the Goosebumps story: the one where a kind boy befriends a Mermaid and fights to save her from capture, or the one where two fisherwoman go insane from their heated competition, mutate into sea monsters, and kill each other?

Either way, Miss Kibuishi is the perfect artist to represent the whimsy, terror, and wonder of sea adventure stories.