#The only thing I do know is that I don't trust John The Cop

[bloodanna]

Finally caught up on The Cellar Letters again.

This show makes me feel insane.

What is a connection? What is a red herring?

Was that continuity error a mistake or on purpose?

There were seven steps to the basement and then twelve.

There have been 12 clock chimes multiple times and then one episode ended as they were sounding which cut them off at 7 chimes. Did you mean to do that?

ARE 12 AND 7 IMPORTANT?

I FEEL INSANE!

I just want answers!

Please!

[jevilowo]

Not sure if ive already done this. But.

Predictions for COMIC 7

CHARLES DARLING WILL BE THE FINAL ENEMY besides Helen. Trust me on this one I swear they wouldn't have brought him in if they didn't have plans. ALSO the mother of the Mann triplets (Bette Mann neé Darling) was RELATED TO HIM HE'S RELEVANT. I'm so convinced he's the one Helen made a deal with and he's going to make a grab for Mann Co.

We'll get to see Bilious Hale in a flashback and find out what happened to him. Bilious Hale, oh guy who punched coal out of mines and sat on John Wilkes Booth while other people shot at him, my beloved. I hope they don't reveal he was a bad father or anything.

A woman is nice to Ms Pauling for once and she gets a smooch. She deserves it. Hopefully it won't be a smooch from Helen (DAMN YOU 4CHAN LEAKS), the old lady's had her hired since Pauling was in her mid teens.

WE GET HORSEMANN LORE! this is just wishful thinking on my part the Horsemann makes me insane. Shout out to Silas Mann fr. If he doesn't show up, I hope they at least acknowledge or reference him. I swear they had plans for him back in 2010. Which they then immediately abandoned in favour of developing Mann vs Machine.

Spydad reveal. Pretty much a given. No need to elaborate. I hope Scout’s mother shows up I love her.

Demo gets something important to do! He's only been there for comedic bits so far really, so I think he deserves some Serious Plot Stuff.

Build up to and cop out on Pyro face reveal. The whole thing of Pyro's character is the mystery, so I think the funniest way to go about a face reveal would be for us to only see the team's reactions and have them all react very differently e.g. Scout vomits, Demo gives them the thumbs up, Spy starts taking horrified notes, Engie looks vaguely lovestruck, Saxton Hale expresses annoyance that they aren't actually *insert obsucure species of something here* like he thought.

CONAGHER LORE!! By which I mean Engie shows up and has a chat with Fred about Radigan and immortality and whatnot. Fred has to have been spared from the bloodshed for a reason, right?

Classic Medic shows up! Or they confirm he is dead. Or they confirm he is Pyro which is a funny theory I read once but sincerely doubt. Maybe they'll pull a Bea and have him have been a girl the whole time.

I have a crackpot theory that Helen/Elizabeth is actually Bette Mann (again, mother of the Mann triplets), and while it's unlikely to be true, it would genuinely be so funny if I'm right so WATCH THIS SPACE. My main reasoning is Helen started her Australium search the year the triplets were born, aka the year Bette DIED, and also Bette is a nickname for Elizabeth. Also also it adds to my theory that she will team up with Charles Darling, who is, as I've already said, related to Bette.

Olivia gets to do something important also. Saying this bc she's mostly been a prop so far. I'm manifesting a sideplot where she summons the Horsemann to beat up Charles Darling for her.

Merasmus returns! Last we saw he was arrested, but Jay Pinkerton really likes his Soldier/Merasmus interactions so chances of him coming back are high.

There will be a joke like "geez it feels like it's been seven years since we beat grey mann" and a panel where everyone just lets that process before going back to plot stuff

Chances are, a new comic after so many years means there will be new writers, and the fandom has changed quite a bit since the last one. There will be SUBLIMINAL SPEEDING BULLET SHIPPING. There will be MORE FOCUS THAN IS REALLY NECESSARY on Scout. SOMEONE WILL THEY/THEM PYRO which sounds great actually you know what I forgot where I was going with this godspeed.

ZHANNASOLDIER WEDDING FINALE!!!

[unlikelyjapan]

s2e8 rewatch notes

I've been living under a rock this week, but I did do a dive into Bolognese.

I've noticed there's only sunlight in the dining room when Syd and Carmy are together - otherwise it's always cast in a pale blue or artificial hue during the daytime. There's so much uncertainty in the opening scene, with Syd surveying the in-progress landscape by herself, like she knows it might be all for not.

Cut to Carmy stimmying alone in the kitchen. Claire's "you alright?" and Carmy's blank expression "Yeah, I'm alright" followed by Claire whispering "everything's fine" - others have touched eloquently on the infantalization, but so much of their relationship is dependent on her telling him how to feel. She asks him about the NICET level-2 exam, and he trails off mid-way because he really doesn't want to be discussing this with her - it punctures the love bubble.

Claire can feel the hesitation marks - re: with him sharing about his work, about his relationship/situationship with her, and that's what spawns the abrupt "never, ever apologize" - she's effectively telling him "you don't need to say anything" so she can continue being in control of their narrative. She's emotionally intuitive enough to see he's mentally in anguish,  and she's trying to protect the connection at all costs by denying him any opportunity to experience/feel that anguish.

I don't think her actions are nefarious, it's just that when someone really REALLY wants someone else, they're bound to manipulate their emotions. We see it in her helping flip the narratives about the cannoli too - it's very much a "change the angles/change the lighting" move on something that is actually big . fucking. deal - it's projected like she's simply invested in Carmy's improvement, but it's also incredibly self-serving.

UGH the whispering. On second viewing, I can view it more as intentional discomfort, but it's still like being spit-roasted in CW Network hell.

"Lay my Love" John Cale and Brian Eno playing - "I am the crow of desperation, I need no fact or validation" - the whole song is about the relentlessness (and shadiness) of getting someone to love you back. Carmy suppresses who he is (and what he's feeling) to be with Claire, Claire aids in suppressing Carmy's feelings and completely sublimates her own need for everything (other than Carmy) to get him to want to be with her.

Tina & Ebra - yay, I love witnessing platonic friendships/working partnerships! /s

Someone please cross-stitch me an "Old bitches like their bitch ways" pendant to hang in my kitchen. Beyond that, there's not much to analyze in this scene - Ebra seems to feel more shame than resentment in his need to stay fixed. This is such a great interlude for the episode - showing that failure is tolerated within the found family, there's a place for everyone etc.

The fire suppression test is the shoe that doesn't drop for Carmy (so it emboldens him - the world didn't end, he's safe, so he immediately jumps into a defined relationship 2 weeks from open at the end of the episode) while Syd understands that the test just means they have permission to begin the first leg of their journey.

Hence, her response to "Just thinking about the fire suppression test" is a broader "Controlling the zone, staying calm, creating space, trust" - "How do we do this?" Carmy defers to her for the emotional labor of running The Bear - again. He figures he's there to deliver her things that impress her and elevate her (his talented palate, the chaos menu, a chef's coat, her star via his cache) - so naturally he thinks it's mission accomplished as soon as they have clearance to open.

Talking about the potential of failing the suppression test, they say "We are fucked" - in unison. When Sydney echos Carmy, he cops another sneaky glance at her face (sorry, I'm graphically feeble so I didn't grab a shot) not unlike the scene where they're talking in the kitchen. Contrasting this with the mumbled anxiety conversation with Claire, this conversation gives him strength - when they have these synchronistic moments, Carmen feels incredibly seen and heard.

"The best offenses have the ability to reset and adapt on a dime."

"We can do that though."

"We have to."

Well, one of them achieved this. Sydney is the offense. Carmy is the defense. Sydney is adapting to all the travails set up in the process of opening the restaurant - including Carmy - attempting to score a win. Carmy is blocking her from that win, but he's a shitty defense because his whole schtick is impressing Syd ironically taking Coach K to heart in his personal life. I think back to the intro-interview I transcribed at the beginning of Forks (from Coach's interview):

The very first thing is that in order to get better you change limits. And when you change limits, you're going to look bad and you're going to fail. And at West Point I learned that failure was never a destination. In other words, when you are knocked back, you know, figure out why, then change.

Carmy changed the limits in so many things - in his boundaries in relationships (with both Syd and Claire), opening his own restaurant, and reaching for more of life in general. He's failing, as expected - but he's also failing to play defensively, to figure out the why- the wind is just sort of carrying him along.

They also reinforce in the same talk that "you're not going to get there alone" -  he's simultaneously trying to do this with Syd (as a "team" as it exists in his mind) and FOR Syd (laying what she's asked for at her feet like a sad cat seeking praise when she really just wanted him to listen).

"Carmy said he was going to handle it" - ahaha, I get it. The fridge handle comes off - Carmy constantly says "I'll handle it." Someone in the writer's room earned a cracker.

By this point, you can tell everyone on the team is exasperated by his absentee B.S, even if half of them are enablers.

"I was going to surprise you" - oooh Marcus.

"I see you with the olive oil" - Syd calling back to the apartment kitchen scene in s1e8.

The smile dissipates from Marcus' face instantly after Syd tries the dessert and Carmen interjects with the dextrose. These man hoes are so messy - I don't care what the Hollywood Reporter cranks out, I write it as I see it.

Marcus resets and the smile comes back when Carmen looks at his dessert and says "very yes", but not with the same intensity.

Also, so much for the Coach K "don't make excuses" - when Syd accosts Carmy about the fridge door, he immediately discusses his 'gnarly panic attack' - from one angle, he's learning to open up on his trauma via his relationship with Claire, but he's also using subtle manipulation to evade responsibility for things.

"She's a girl who's a FRIEND??" - Syd

"She's a girlfriend? You think?" - Carmy

"Oooh." - Syd

"Ooooh. Okay. Uh. Next" - Marcus

If you follow this up later with Marcus saying "That's healthy" re: the cannoli with solemn eyes, one begins to intuit that he doesn't think much of Carmy beyond boss-guy by this point (I mean, neither do others right now, but he's been in Europe).

He attributes Copenhagen to Syd (which, fair enough, it was her idea, but it was a window into Carmy's life orchestrated by Carmy) and you can tell the writers are playing with the tension by this point. Carmy as buffer/barrier. He only breaks the tension when Carmen says "for real" after trying the Copenhagen sundae - Carmy's expertise still means something to Marcus.

Richie's apology to Natalie - for Everything. "For a long time I didn't know where I fit, and I would shove myself into, like, places and things where I definitely did not fit. And I think that that probably....definitely....made things worse. And I'm sorry if I took anything out on you and if I treated you like shit."

In summary - sorry for injecting myself into your family for years and riling everyone up and manipulating the whole family dynamic. Sorry for aiding in Mikey's downfall. Sorry for aiding in Carmy's downfall.  Sorry for not protecting you amidst all that. Sorry for all my "Van Halen" shit at work trying to compensate for what I lost with your family, with my own family I tried to build.

"That's why you're wearing the suit?"

"Um....I'm wearing the suit because it makes me feel better about myself."

I like that Natalie appreciates the visual confirmation that Richie is trying to be better, to practice self-love - she knows that's the inverse of The Beef and the Berzattos. And hearing Richie say "I need this place to work" and Gary echoing "WE need this place to work" is Natalie's first confirmation she's probably heard that the team isn't just her and Syd. She becomes so much lighter after this scene.

Syd rolling her eyes after hearing Carmy say he "had to draw them because the heat was off" - she's a technical and practical person, and you can tell that it's mildly aggravating (in that lovingly jealous way) that creative pursuits come to Carmy so easily. She has to absorb inspiration and creativity through observation and study, whereas with him it's self-contained.

Carmy cuts the tape as he's getting fired up/enthusiastic with Syd - noticing the details again, getting into the zone, and smiling.

Originally, the golem in me was like "haha, he ignored the lame "level 2 baby!" text from Claire, but I now realize that he reads it and then immediately leaves that "zone" - he again pushes labor onto Sydney regarding his Iberico hook-up  "uh yeah - I'll give you his number, and uh, you can go ahead and you can call him." He was stoked seconds ago, he finally seemed absorbed in his space and his work - this man is so conflicted.

"This looks kinda like a chaos menu"

"Well no, it's like, it's a thoughtful chaos menu."

"Oh."

"Look, Claire and I, we were talking about it last night, and she-she made me realize that maybe I'm clinging onto some things that....I don't know, maybe, I just, I don't care that much about anymore"

I just noticed that he looks directly into Syd's eyes as he says the last sentence - dagger to the heart of their partnership from her POV.

"And this is good, right? Because this is what you wanted."

*this is a 'your cat dropping a dead bird on your carpet' moment*

"Yo why are you being like that?

I feel like Syd's perspective on the fight has been amply analyzed on here, I have no notes.

I found it more interesting that Carmy starts ranting more hurt and emotional than he's ever sounded talking to her before. "I'm sorry, I like, fucking hated Cannoli's my whole life and now..."

*Cue ASL* "STOP. Stop."

He was about to spill his guts for her here. He can't understand why she's upset (I did this for you), he doesn't understand why she's mad about Claire (she was my sounding board for your ideas, she's not my girlfriend!), and he wants to share with her how he got here (Syd's menu, built for Syd - his pain converted into something healing).

Ugh - Syd's "you need to decide if this person is a girlfriend or girl that's a friend" demand for an answer being interpreted as an instruction. Again, it's been discussed to death, but now there are so many dead birds on the carpet to clean up.

The Crane Wife by The Decemberists plays as Carmen enters the fridge and asks Fak if Claire is his girlfriend. I feel like "I hate Fak's meddling ass"  is going to be inscribed on my tombstone by loved ones at this point, but it doesn't need to be discussed - the whole thing is beautifully broken down with the meaning behind the song here. (Ugh, I've lost the link! Whoever has this post flagged come forward so I can link it/give credit? It was perfect.)

The interjection with Richie (doing Carmy's bidding) in having Sydney approve putting Mikey's dying note to Carmen on the line though? Jesus H. Christ - it's not even that they pan to a scene with Sydney after Carmen says "I love her a lot?" re: Claire, it's literally about Syd having the final say as to WHETHER HIS DEAD BROTHERS LOVE LETTER TO HIM IS OKAY TO BE ON THE LINE.

I feel like this scene was a win for the sydrichies too, and I earnestly I don't know what they were doing there - the compliments, the only-child dialogue. "It's nice that you have Syd and Nat" "Yeah, now you do too"

But she says "thanks for asking" to Richie - even though it was Carmy asking her if this massive thing was okay. There's a wall (the one just rebuilt) between Syd and Carmy after the kitchen conversation, things are moving through Richie as the conduit now. Richie is her partner while Carmy is MIA.

Cicero and Natalie in the car:

"Appraisal on the lot came back".....

"But here's where things, uh, get funky, right? .... skyrocketing interest rates"

Remember the Olivia Coleman scene where she was talking about the market crashing and her initial dream restaurant getting killed? More foreshadowing for S3 I guess.

"Hey, if you were to have kids all over again, what would you do?"

"Oh, honey, I wouldn't have them......"  "You know, Nat, I'd um...what would I do? I would want them to be....not so fucking afraid of things, you know? I'd protect them less. Yeah. I'd want em to have more fun, make more mistakes. Get into more fuckin' trouble, you know? I don't know how to do it...but that, that's what I'd do."

Although Cicero smells blood in the water, he's The Bears daddy (and probably the closest thing to a father that Richie, Carmy and Natalie have now) - I think he wants to push them, he'll let them make mistakes, but he won't let them become "a story of complete and utter failure" I believe. And so does Natalie.

As the sign changes to "10 days to open"

Carmy "What are you guys doing?"

Natalie "Just staring at some stuff" as her and Syd go over the calendar. They're alone together in work again.

The inner narratives of each character during the fire suppression countdown are so revealing:

Syd - Restaurant closure signs, old boxes of Sheridan Road paperwork, her father grasping her shoulders in comfort as she looks away from him, seemingly insecure/dejected. (Fear of failure dominates)

Natalie - Bills and IRS statements piling up, her mother torturing her 5 years earlier, cuddling with Pete on the couch and looking peaceful. (Fear of moving backwards dominates)

Ebra - Being praised with "He's learning!" and putting on his Original Beef shirt with a smile. (Nostalgia dominates- fear of change)

Marcus - Smiling at the beef, tasting his own dessert, taking care of his mother in the hospital. (Comfort dominates - fear of loss)

Tina - "I'm grateful for all y'all motherfuckers" hugging Richie, laughing at family meal. (Love dominates)

Richie - Tiff saying "You're going to be such a cute dad", family snaps with a picture of Claire holding and smiling at Eva front-and-center (!!!), laughing at family meal. (Loss dominates - also living vicariously through Carmy with Claire or!? What a weird fucking montage, someone please explain)

Fak - The balloon popping repeatedly (Fear of immediate failure...)

Carmy - The stove burners, the burning frozen food at his apartment, the portrait of the bear he drew, Mikey's face when he received it, the flames licking the wall at the beef, the clock at 11:51, his eyes vacantly reflecting the flames, pictures of Natalie/Donna/Cicero/himself as a kid, Mikey smiling deranged, Michelle telling him "keep going", the flash of the red kitchen clock as the examiner says "3" (wow....this gets its own post in a bit, it's late)

Then it's just interspersed shots of Carmy nodding and Sydney's nostrils flaring as they count down the remaining numbers.

The aftermath/the hugs have been well-dissected, I'll leave it to others.

Song lyrics during restaurant cooking montage

I will come to you in the daytime

I will raise you from your sleep

I will kiss you in four places

As I go runnin' down your street

I will squeeze the life right out of you

You will make me laugh and make me cry

And though we try to forget it

You will make me call your name

As I shout it into the blue summer sky

And we may never meet again

So shed your skin and lets get started

And you will throw your arms around me

Song lyrics from "I gotta go call my girlfriend"

I have dreamed of you in the daytime (Claire working the ER)

And I have watched you in your sleep (Carmy grocery shopping)

I met you in high places (Carmy cooking while wearing his The Beef shirt - regression much?)

Touched your head and touched your feet (Syd scrubbing the floor)

And though I disappear from out of you (Claire leaving the ER)

And though I disappear from out of you (Sydney on transit watching the game - announcer says "they need a miracle")

And though I try to forget it (Carmy cooking/shredding cheese)

You will make me call your name (Sydney getting home)

As I shout it into the blue summer sky (Sydney getting undressed, revealing the 3 of Swords tattoo - Claire walking in and kissing Carmy)

"We may never meet again" (goes to black)

Apologies if someone already broke all of this down, but what in the heavy-handed fuck is this?

[ksiondzkanexkiii]

MAYBE YOU'RE NOT A BAD PERSON | John Price

CHAPTER THREE

Next chapter (4)

The story is also on wattpad, Nebook, Tumblr Enjoy

How much do you have to stray to find yourself here, where Jinx is currently located? The answer is simple you had to be Jinx to figure it out and find yourself here, she had been seated on the couch since she and John entered the house. Her watchful eyes looked around every nook and cranny of the house even as her body sat on the white soft couch, quite soft it was, but too soft for Jinx. She was used to harder and not more comfortable things, when she recalled the uncomfortable chairs in the interrogation room in the reformatory she shuddered to the point of disgust

Maybe the couch wasn't so bad after all.

It also didn't escape the fact that her new guardian was limping on one leg, she didn't know why, but she could guess a lot of theories, but it could also be useful for running away faster he would get tired and she would escape

Because who would run if his leg hurts?

Certainly not her, she didn't know how John would, but it's unlikely he would either.

When the former captain returned from the kitchen he was holding two mugs from which a hot drink was steaming, he placed these mugs on the coffee table opposite Jinx and himself settled on the armchair that begged for the captain to walk from it, the teenager wondered how the armchair didn't break under the weight of the captain's live muscles.

- So," he began in a hoarse voice, god his throat cried out for water or it would have begged him to quit smoking, he smoked it could not be hidden the smell of nicotine chased him like a predator, it settled in every nook and cranny of the house as well as his clothes, he crossed his hands on his knees leaning forward

Beyond the bad cop

Not for her such numbers

- We'll start nice if we're nice to each other. You'll get out of here faster," he grunted, and his blue eyes did not break away from the smaller figure of the teenager. She tensed slightly - What do you mean? - she wondered aloud

- Follow the rules a - he began to explain - And you will not face punishment? Yes I know this formula - she sneered, the captain's lush eyebrow raised - I don't like to be interrupted - he muttered under his breath, and his voice was rough and his British accent added aggressiveness at this point

She might have felt like being trapped by a predator, she was the prey and John held the reins as to how he would torture her here and get pleasure out of it?  Apparently he had done for her... well that's what it was, she reached for the mug closest to her looking inside the hot steam was hitting her eyes causing a small tear, but the dark liquid in the mug puzzled her. Tea? Did he make her tea?

Nice

- Yes it's tea, I didn't sweeten it because I didn't know if you liked it - As if he sensed her thoughts he answered her unspoken questions - Back to the topic, you don't try to escape and change. I won't pester you very much both of us will win the case and split up - his finger pointed at me - Unless you don't want to change then I'll already call Kate to say you've changed your mind –

- No! - she quickly denied it, spit it out of her mouth as if it steamed her tongue - I will try to change. Give it a chance," she muttered after a moment of awkward silence. She lowered her gaze to the cup in her hand

Of course she didn't want to change. But this was her chance to escape. Not great, but what there was was enough for her to come up with a plan and she could escape. The apartment doesn't look like one that's hard to escape from only its owner might be hard to get past, but nothing is impossible, all she has to do is lie to him so that he trusts her, and when he closes his eyes he won't have the costliest things she'll sell when she escapes

Plan the perfect time to implement

- Well. Maybe... in a different way - Price looked around his apartment as he spoke, reading her file, but the questions were coming up. He wanted answers she could give, leaning back his back found the back of a chair that squeaked, seriously how does this chair hold him?

- Jinx is not your name right? - He asked chh he knew the answer to that question, who would give a child the name JInx? Pech. So sad it sounds like her parents regretted begetting her in giving her that name they wanted to make sure she would know it for the rest of her life - It sounds like a nickname, a pseudonym. What is your real name? - Jinx for not speaking the silence filled their already one-sided conversation

- Did the cat bite your tongue? - irritation rose in Price's veins - If I am to help you change then he wants to know what your name is - he interrupted - your real name -.

- Call me Jinx. Answers must be earned, trust is not such a simple thing and yet you ask for it not a friend. - She shrugged her shoulders, she did not want to give her real name. She didn't like it, her real name reminded her how much she had to suffer when she was young she hated it. She wanted to bury the past seven meters underground, but each time the past found a way to dig itself out of the ground like a walking corpse followed Jinx without giving her the opportunity to escape - You are smart - shrugged the former captain

- Good. - He smiled, Jinx only furrowed her eyebrows - This will mean that the challenge will be greater. And I like challenges - he explained seeing her confused face

- Is that what you were in the army for? - she asked curiously - You pay for answers kiddo - he has already given her a nickname? He is fast, kiddo. She snorted under her breath, I think she will start calling him an old man in that case.

That's how he looked, that gray hair said how much he had lived on this planet, he might as well be old and retired and not retire early just because he got injured - Let's play a game - Jinx started talking gaining Price's interest although the interest never waned he kept watching her with his eyes he could see the cogs going on in her brain - Answer for answer - She confessed - I ask a question you answer then you ask me questions and I answer - She explained the deeper rules of the game she invented

- Since when were you in the army? - she asked the first question, Price turned his head slightly - Since I turned eighteen - he answered directly

- Your turn to ask -

- I know, you won't tell me what your real name is right? -

- No. I said call me Jinx –

Price could have cursed in his mind, but it will get to the point one day when the teenager will answer the questions that bother him, he knew that now most of them will not be answered anyway - How old were you when you got the rank of captain? -

- When I was twenty-five I got the rank of captain, and when I was twenty I got the rank of lieutenant - he shrugged his shoulders as if it was nothing and yet in the eyes of the teenager he was like a walking star.

- A quick promotion," Jinx concluded, earning a shoulder shrug from Price. It may have been a quick promotion, but a well-deserved promotion in the eyes of the captain - You could say that," muttered the hoarse voice of the former captain

- How old are you kid? - Jinx sent him a murderous look - Don't talk to me kid - she hissed slightly - I'm sixteen - she replied after a moment of silence - You could have let go of that hissing and that tone of voice. I don't like that kind - The captain had a poker face as if her hissing didn't impress him

He has been cornered many times by. Well. Unruly recruits who thought they could scare Price a lot, for example, and yet they were wrong John had a lot of dealings with recruits and rudeness that nothing impressed him

It took effort to impress him. Jinx will get to that point someday to impress him, the good ones as well as the bad. That's how she made a mental note of the surprise of this man who looks like he has a hidden soft soul, she wasn't interested in this soft side she wanted to evoke the beast that was currently also hiding behind the poised mask of an injured captain

- Why did you leave the army? You don't look like you are old enough to retire from it," she asked extremely curious, "Premature retirement? -

- These were two questions. My injury prevents me from returning to the front for the time being," he confessed, as if it didn't bother him at all and yet deep down he longed for that adrenaline he felt during combat. But his health did not allow him at the moment, however much he disliked this decision he had to respect it if he did not want to end up in the grave too soon

Come to think of it, he already had one foot in the grave anyway. Any mission could have been his last mission such an occupational hazard even if he didn't like it standing close to the dark reaper just waiting for him to stumble, but this was the life he chose did he regret it? In part, but the greater part of his soul was proud that he could save the world, his country, his home, his family. He wouldn't change it for anything in the world this is what he wanted

From birth, he was written in as a future captain as if that was his calling. But he doubted if it was supposed to be his calling, guarding a teenager who had packed herself into a reformatory and now the government was desperately trying to change her. It's so easy to change a person he could stifle the urge in her soul to vandalize or steal, but he would never change her. That was the truth he could not change

The yawn that came out of the teenager's mouth effectively snapped the captain out of his reverie, he guessed that the day must have been tiring for the teenager. She had survived a long trip from Laswell that could have been completed in two hours and yet they had traveled two and a half hours, and now she was experiencing a change of climate, a change of place learning new rules.

Price could chastise himself for currently imposing too much on the teenager, he should slow down. Give her a warning to acclimate, but at the same time put up the rule boards. Boards like a decalogue come on he wasn't a believer she wasn't likely to be either if it was, both of them are just frying in hell like warm sardines.

- He will show you the room. The rest of the rules and other little things you'll learn tomorrow," he got up from his chair, showed his finger behind should follow him, Jinx put down the empty tea cup on the table noticed that Price completely did not drink his tea. He didn't even touch it

Wasted tea, it got cold. Rather not drink it cold

She followed the ex-captain down the long white hallway the dark floor contrasted with the white on the walls and the pictures on the wall depicted every element of the captain's life the matching dark oak picture frame matched the color of the room, he certainly had taste.

Jinx didn't have time to stop at each photo to look at them, with quick steps she chased the captain. His gait was slow, but he had big steps, the teenager had to trot to catch up with him - This is your room - he opened the door at the end of the corridor, Jinx went through it pushing past the man. The room wasn't big, but it wasn't small either she had a closet not big was in the corner a small desk bigger than she had in her cell. Well there will be more space and it will be easier to write and draw no elbow will bother her and lack of space. The bed was sufficient

What caught the teenager's attention the most was the bars in the window, she sent a glance to the former captain in the form of an unspoken question "Seriously? " he merely shrugged his shoulders at this

A question of security

She knew it, it gave her the impression that she had landed in a reformatory again only this was more... Friendly and exclusive. She threw her backpack under the foot of the bed looking around the room, everything was clean and white as if Price had washed and prepared everything before her arrival. She wasn't surprised he received her more like some kind of guest than a prisoner the government was trying to change

- Don't try to escape in the night, don't destroy anything - With these words the former captain said goodbye, the teenager's eyes rested on the figure who was already closing the door, she didn't hear him lock her room with a key, but he certainly locked the front door and every window taking the keys with him.

She still didn't have the strength to escape, the whole day had tired her out. It wasn't a day to escape she didn't know the area yet she didn't know where to hide in case of emergency and how to escape from him she had to find out first to plan her escape. And currently she will go to sleep, she threw herself on the mattress, which bent under her weight.

It was soft, too soft, but no spring poked into her ribs, so she couldn't complain. Fatigue weighed down her eyelids causing them to close so that her body relaxed her mind straightened to fall into dreamland.

[lydiaas]

You know what's something really subtle I really really REALLY hated Mike for? When he said "but then I learned about hard work" TO JJ!!!!

This kid is 16 and has been working for God knows how long ‘cause he doesn't have a single adult figure who provides for him, he worked with boats, he worked at the bar, he did small things for the Heywards 'cause yeah, Pope's dad is actually a decent man who recognizes JJ doesn't have much and offered him to help out with their family business from time to time for some extra money and the Carreras who also own an activity?What have they done to give this kid a chance?The guts Mike Carrera has to know damn well this 16 years old kid comes from an abusive household and had to provide from himself since forever and to say he doesn't know about hard work and what have you (an adult aware of the situation) done to help? He could have easily thought "ok my daughter's friend is in serious need of help and we could offer him a job" but he didn't. You have a job to offer, give it to him a sixteen years old homeless kid who also happens to be a really important person for your daughter.

I hate JJ's situation so much 'cause not only it's incredibly hard as it is but you also add the fact there isn't a single adult who cares enough to help him out of it, starting from the cops who should have reported him to social services like they did with John B but instead constantly mocked him, the school, the parents of his friends who could have easily stepped in but didn't (except for Heyward, the only adult with rights in this show)... and as if it isn't enough those same adults are also surprised and blame him for not trusting the system, adult figures and authorities, well how could he? Every single one of them let him down.

JJ DESERVES NOTHING BUT HAPPINESS AND I HOPE HE BUILT HIMSELF THE LIFE HE DESERVES IN THOSE 18 MONTHS!!

I'm gonna put you in jail for these takes in a second!

You're so right. I'm now thinking about the way that half of JJ's wardrobe are clearly things he got from places he's worked. He's been providing for himself for so long.

A lot of the way JJ is treated comes down to who his father is and it's sadly realistic. Luke is a piece of shit who has probably burned a lot of bridges and people can't look past that and recognise JJ is still just a kid who is doing whatever he can to survive.

Every negative thing JJ thinks about himself comes from other people or his father telling him so. He had no hope at being a well adjusted teen. It's really damning that Mike, someone who admits to recognising parts of himself in JJ, can't realise he could be the one to make a positive difference. This choice of characterisation for Mike is really interesting to me because it is in line with the way the writers explore flawed father figures (Heyward really stands alone).

At the anniversary party JJ says "When you see Mike, could you just let him know that I don't feel bad about the money clip? Okay? Just let him know I actually needed it". And yeah he's lobbing a grenade into his relationship with Kie because he's in self sabotage mode but there is also nothing but truth in that statement. You can feel the resentment in "Just let him know I actually needed it". Resentment that no one recognises how much he is struggling and resentment that every terrible thing he thinks about himself keeps being validated by the adults around him. JJ is drowning and Mike can't even throw him a lifeline.

[itspdameronthings]

Benny the Rookie Cop Pt2

Summary:I know this part is intense. First part is anyway. It deals with Santi going off the deep end. Sorry about that. Fear not! there is a sweet Benny and Grace moment at the end which im gonna write another fic . More like an extended scene.

Meanwhile a few blocks away sounds of restlessness fills Santi’s home. He is on the floor with a bottle of his favorite whiskey. Drinking the numbness he feels. Life hasn't been good for him. Latest relationship has ended. That really hurt him to no end. Thought she was the one. After two years together things were on the up and up till something happened. Coming home to see her stuff was missing. All that remained was a dear John letter. No explanation,but she can't deal with his manic episodes. Then… his baby sister getting married to his best friend. He should be happy for them. Welcome Benny into the family. Resentment fueled his mind. Goal is for others to be shitty. 

He hasn't been to work for days. Will was beyond worried. Calls and texts were unanswered. On this night he goes over to see if Santi was okay. Letting himself in with a spare key looking around how messy the place was. Dishes in the sink smells of booze fills the air. Clothes on the floor. Caused Will to go upstairs to see his friend on the floor only wearing a pair of ratted green sweats. No shirt. Unkempt hair ,and matted beard. Kneels down,” Care to explain why you haven't called me?! Was worried that something happened! Had to postpone our presentation to next month! Our ass is on the line?! Gonna lose our important client ?! Are you gonna say anything?!” Santi looks at him whipping his mouth,"Of course I care,but not right now. Leave me to wallow in my misery. Too sick to care about shit. Now leave me alone! Go back to your happy home!” Looks like Will isn't getting through him. Think he needs some help. Thought about calling Frankie,but he is on vacation with his daughter. Benny hates to call him knowing he just got off from work. Taking a breath got out his phone: 

Older brother: look bro, hate to do this,but I need your help. At Pope’s he is in a drunken mess. 

Sound of a phone going off caused Benny to slowly wake up from sleeping with his beautiful wife. Can't stop holding onto her. Rubbing his eyes. Looking at the message,” Shit! Not again!” Tried not to wake Gracie slowly got up to get dressed, sudden movement stopped him. Small hands on his shoulders stopped him . Soft voice fills the room,” What's wrong baby? Another bad dream? If it is? Let me help.” Taking a breath,” Your brother is drunk yet again. Gonna go to help Will. Wantcha to stay home okay? Can't have my rose hurt. Need ya to keep my side of the bed warm and toasty. “ Gracie not listening. Still wrapped in the bedsheet. Goes to get dressed,” Think I can help too. We are family, remember? “ Benny goes over to her now naked form. Hugs her from behind,” I know darlin. Just trust me okay? Let me and Will handle it. If we need help? I'll call. “ Gracie closed her eyes. Knowing he might be right. Sure both of them had training in dealing with this kind of behavior. This is her brother. Might not have seen Santi like that. Oh the boys have. Soon as her husband leaves. She goes to her nightstand to fetch her phone. Calls someone who delt with this before. Her mother. 

Benny arrives at Santi’s . Noise of shouting caught his attention. Sounds of things hitting a wall. Rushed upstairs to see both Santi and Will yelling. Sees a broken bottle on the floor. Goes over to break up the fight. Goes between them,” Enough! Stand fucking down!” Santi not hearing this. Goes to push Benny away from him,” oh look is here! Person who stole my sister away from me! Ordering me around my own place! Why don't you both go home !”Looking into his brother in law in the eye. Not moving,” Not a chance man. You're endangering yourself ya know that?! Need help! Not leaving so tell us what's wrong.” Santi grunts,” Nothing ,and I mean nothing is wrong! Can a person be alone for a while?! That's all I fucking want!! Want to wallow okay?!” Now the plot thickens. Wallow. It's Will who figured it out. Leans against the wall in his signature pose. Arms crossed,” I know why. Chelsea. Left you in this state of misery. Furthermore? Resenting the fact Benny stole Gracie from you! Preposterous! Can't face that she is an adult. She loves you man. Problem is that can't someone else take over. “ Those words cut through Santi’s soul like a knife. Yes he is going through a lot. Feeling like the others never endure that kind of pain. Until he remembers Will went through the same thing. Now he feels like shit. Brothers sat next to him while he cried. 

Rosa Garcia rushed inside her son's home. With Gracie in tow. Looking at the state the home is in. Brought back memories of her late husband. Brought tears to her eyes. Her son is going down the same path . She knew he was going through stuff,but never thought he would destroy himself in this kind of matter. Gracie stays downstairs to clean up. Rosa slowly approaches a bedroom to see her son,and her sons in law . Benny, first to see her, goes to hug her,” Mama, Glad you are here. Got him calm ,but.. with all of my trainin in this? Thought could get through him. “ Hugs him tightly,” It would be fine my baby boy. Go downstairs okay? Your rose is there cleaning up. Means you too William shoo!” Will kisses her forehead as he leaves. Santi whimpers,” I'm a bad son Mama! Don't know how I can overcome it…” Rubs her son’s back as he lays his head on her lap. Needs to feel safe right now. Rosie knows that as well. He needs help to cope. Whispers to her son,” I'm here baby boy. You know drinking your troubles away isn't gonna help. Either is being a complete boota to your sister,and husband. Can't you see it's hurting them? Getting dumped hurts I know. Been there honey. Tell you what. I'm gonna move in for a while.help you get through this. First thing first. Go downstairs to apologize to the young couple. Tomorrow? Taking you to counseling.” 

Mother and son come downstairs to see his family cleaning up the living room. Gracie is first to see her mom and brother. Not looking at him she walks away. Not before Santi blocks her,” Look here G. I'm sorry. Okay? Never thought my anger hurt you the way it did. Was in a bad place. I'm glad you have Benny. I mean it. I'm afraid that I'm..” Reaching out to hug her brother. So does Benny. Hug him close. Rosa whispers to the young couple,” Go home. We got this. Family dinner is gonna be pushed back for a few days. You two have fun on your days off. Mama’s orders.” Santi watches from afar as his sister and brother in law hold each other close. Try not to fall apart. Will comes up to him placed his hand on his shoulder,” you will find one special man. First thing is to get ya well again. “ Santi takes a deep breath,” Thanks for coming by man.” Will chuckles again,” That's what family does man . We help.”

Young couple arrived home. Exhausted mentally and physically. Benny reached out to hold Gracie who practically held on to him. Breathed in his special scent,” Had to call mama. Had too. Hope you aren't mad.” Kissing her forehead ever so gently, he whispers,” I'm not. Glad ya did. Wasn't getting much lead way until Will figured it out. Now.. how about we go to bed. Hmm? Can cuddle, or watch some trashy show ya like.” Tracing patterns along his neck as he picks her in a bridal position,” I much rather have my rookie make love to me. Followed by some cuddling. Then.. we can stay in bed tomorrow since it's gonna rain.” 

Once they get into bed. Benny holds her close to his warm body. Trace loving patterns along her arm. How he wanted to fully fill her first request. Sees her fast asleep in his arms. Making love is the first thing to do in the morning. Holds her close to him. Thinking about how he really needs to protect her even more. Yes, Santi has a long journey ahead. Feared he might have a relapse. Whispers into her ear,” Love you my Rose bud. With all of my heart. Make sure you are safe for what's to come. Pray for Pope’s recovery is a success.” 

[iamnot-theboynextdoor]

OFMD EP1 REACTION

i already know this is a dream sequence but opening on stede and izzy having a badass swordfight is dope

stede's fantasy is all about him looking and sounding super masc... babyboy that's not you...

HE FUCKING STABBED IZZY. HE KILLED HIM

and of course izzy's last words are "you absolute twaaaaaaaaaat" i'm fucking dying

AND THERE'S THE SLOMO BAYWATCH RUN GOD I LOVE IT

"knew you'd find me babe" and of course ed's got his beautiful beard back and he looks perfect and he loves stede's beard sfjgdskjgdshj stede

aaaaaaand f in the chat for stede's dream sequence, wee john is doing chemical warfare

"can't be worse than you moaning 'ed, oh, ed' all night long" f in the chat for black pete and the rest of the crew

AHAHAHA roach going "he's single" and shoving the swede at jackie. c'mon swede be a hobosexual for us we gotta sleep somewhere

"come closer. spanish jackie don't bite. i lied, i bite" and he giggles i am immediately on board congrats jackie on your 21st husband

love olu's fancy bartender waistcoat!

"i'll buy you a drink" this guy! the guy who's practically stede's twin! in the disco outfit that stede steals! is he the guy stede does a punch on? is he hitting on stede? oh my GOD where is this going

"richard banes. are you stede bonnet?" dear lord this guy could not have a posher accent. is he the guy who ends up with a fake nose. he's an undercover cop isn't he. how else does he know who stede is

awww fuck we're cutting to ed. shit's about to go down

(stede) "hope you're thinking of me as well" close-up on ed's TRUST NO-ONE tattoo. fuuuuuuuuck

and immediately the wedding ed's gonna crash is like some extremely classist/"we must breed more upper class, worthy humans" shit, so ed can do a little murder actually i immediately don't feel bad for them

"objection" ed can board a ship without anyone fucking noticing if it looks cool actually

THERE HE IS he's made everyone put on the emo paint. i keep pausing and rewatching this part. love izzy's sarcastic little smile

jim looks so fucking sexy

so does frenchie tbh

ed's just eating the cake. cake topper my beloved...

OH NO IVAN DIED. OFF-SCREEN. F IN THE CHAT. and frenchie only cares about the cake JUST KIDDING HE IS HARDCORE DISSOCIATING. poor fang tho...

stede taking down blackbeard's wanted poster... does he have a little shrine in the pig sty he's sleeping in. does he draw hearts on the posters

"he's just blowing off some steam" stede has decided the atrocities are cool and fun actually. atrocities are okay if the man doing them has big beautiful brown eyes too. what about it

"i also killed someone and stole their kiosk. sometimes action is better than vision" can we get sue on the crew? "that's what i've been telling him" "that's 'cause you're the smart one" sue confirms that olu is the only crewmember with a brain cell

'we can't turn up with any old ship, we need to look good" STEDE. FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKING GOD.

ed putting the little cake topper in his breast pocket next to his heart i'm going feral

"did everyone get cake?" "yeah they got cake"

ed is doing drugs and izzy has never looked more miserable and soggy. he looks like someone dunked him in an inkwell

OH HERE'S THE SCENE. THE SAD WET MEOW MEOW SCENE

shit's gotta be really bad if izzy needs to be rocked and cuddled while he cries... babyboy you should have just let ed hold the talent show...

i am not at all surprised that jackie's taking all of stede and co.'s savings. this is jackie's house. jackie does not have a tip jar. you're in the republic of pirates hide it better next time

BOO CAKES!

well you didn't even get jackie and the swede a wedding present. this is her wedding present. HIDE THE JAR BETTER-

"what if we took that back?" "i think my husbands would have a problem with that. have you met all twenty of 'em?" PAUSING TO LOOK AT THE HUSBANDS.

"that's a lot of husbands" black pete misses his husband, tails. he misses him a lot

love the one wearing no shirt and a tight waistcoat/corset thing with the axe. one's got cool glasses. two of them are either super twinky or lady-husbands, excellent either way (jackie and her lady-husbands, nandor and his guy-wives... beautiful...)

EDIT: THE TWO HUSBANDS ARE TRANS GUYS HELL YEAH HELL YEAH

"i know that guy we had breakfast together" "you will be having a lot of breakfasts-es together" "oh ok" sometimes a family is a pirate businesswoman and her 20 19 18 20 husbands and we stan

maybe the sexy axe husband cooked the breakfast. i am delighting in imagining them being all cute and domestic until jackie needs them to stand around and look intimidating and then they all scramble into position. their job is to cook breakfast and look sexy and scare the shit out of anyone jackie points them at

i like to imagine that as soon as one of jackie's husbands died she's like fuck i gotta get a new one to make up the numbers. my brand is 20 husbands i can't be seen with only 19. who's new in town that is remotely attractive. ooh, swedish blondie with a metal tooth, he'll look nice next to the one in glasses

anyway stede and co. are now homeless rip

why does roach have buttons on a rope leash sfhdskjghsgk is buttons so desperate to return to his true love (the sea) that they have to treat him like a toddler trying to run into traffic

"dear ed, i think i'm afraid to see you. i'm not afraid you're gonna kill me, i'm afraid your life is better without me!" I AM GOING TO LOSE IT. SOMEONE GET THIS POOR BOY SOME SELF-ESTEEM

i paused on the wanted poster and it said "wanted for theft brigandry larceny arson tax evasion" sgkjhsfgkjsfhgk the fucking IRS is going to find ed before stede does

"could be. could be, mate" stede your ed impression sucks shit

oh god richard's there. are you a cop or just a fan.

"the gentleman pirate saved my life! quite frankly, you're my hero!" with his fancy fucking coat oh god stede has a fan. stede has a copycat fan. AND STEDE'S NOW HAPPY OH MY GOD I AM HITTING HIM WITH A HAMMER (affectionate)

he fed stede a line about jackie's roman puzzle chest... i don't fucking trust this guy i'm convinced he's either a navy plant or a husband plant...

(if he is truly just a baby stede i'm putting him in a jar and shaking him (affectionate))

I FUCKING LOVE THE SWEDE

oh god back to ed's depression den

"not good enough. and that's another toe. take your boot off." okay ed, i know you're trying to get izzy or anybody to kill you in your sleep or something but i'm still. noooo don't commit atrocities you're soo sexy aha

"who am i to you" oh god. shit's gotta be really really fucking bad if izzy's doing emotional intimacy

"i have... love for you, edward" i'm going to explode

first of all izzy is delusional if he thinks he knows ed better than anyone else - we know and love this about him

second, con's fucking acting is going to kill me. he's looking at the floor, there are tears in his eyes, he's whispering and pauses as if saying the word love is going to kill him (and it's not just the emotional repression considering how volatile ed is)

and the way the line is written - it's not "i love you" or "i'm in love with you", it's not a thing izzy does or is, it's a thing he has. an object he's carrying around, separate to him, he's trying to distance himself from it.

and of course ed interrupts him with "oh come on" because he does not trust that anyone actually loves him and he doesn't want anyone to any more, he wants izzy to hate him and kill him!

"i'm worried about you, we all are. the atmosphere on this ship is completely poisoned. but if we could all just maybe... talk it through" SHIT'S GOT TO BE REALLY REALLY UNQUESTIONABLY HORRIFICALLY FUCKING BAD IF IZZY IS ADOPTING STEDE'S CATCHPHRASE

ed, ominously "as a crew" as blackbeard's leitmotif starts up... WORST CHOICE OF WORDS EVER IZZY I'M TERRIFIED

izzy: i fucked up i fucked up i fucked up i fucked up i fucked up

POOR FANG IS WHIMPERING ED DON'T SCARE HIM!!!!!

"i know who we should ask, ol' blackbeard!" (shoves gun under his own chin) jesus christ ed

"FUCKING END!" izzy has had ENOUGH

AND AS SOON AS HE SAYS STEDE'S NAME ED SHOOTS HIM

"frenchie, you are now first mate" STEPS OVER IZZY GROANING IN PAIN

i am very worried

HARD CUT TO THE SWEDE AND JACKIE LMAO

oh god stede's adopted ricky. this can only end terribly

aaaaaand f in the chat for ricky's nose

"i can't believe you guys robbed jackie! so bad!" swede.

jackie looks gorgeous though

SUE IS OF COURSE THE BADASS PIRATE QUEEN

and jackie loves her a sexy swedish double-crosser

thank you sue for adopting the gang of idiots

OH GOD JIM AND ARCHIE MOPPING UP IZZY'S BLOOD. THAT'S A LOT OF BLOOD

poor fang is still crying

awwww and jim's telling him pinocchio to calm him down! (but they suck at telling stories)

"do the voice"

and jim does the fucking voice

ed sounds like he's holding back tears as he describes sailing and robbing and never landing

"fuck you, stede bonnet" "good night, ed teach" HHHHHHH

stede come on man pick up a fucking oar you're not the captain any more

at least we got one romantic reunion! and it was buttons and the ocean <3

sdkfjhsdkjgsdk everyone being like "are we soup merchants now? sweet" and olu with his poor overworked brain cell like "hang on... there's no soup here"

ZHENG YI SAO FUCK YEAH BAY BEE

AFTER CREDITS SEQUENCE!!! storytime with jim extended edition!!!!!

[whatgaviiformes]

Thunderpride headcanons

I've been in and out of work and life things, so I've not been able to stay as tuned in to thunderpride as I would've liked. I am loving what you all have been creating and celebrating for what I've seen so far, though!

For myself, this may be a cop out answer, but I am not tied into any one headcanon for the bros, which means I tend to feel very open to different perspectives about their sexualities, partners, and identities. If it's a good story or exploration I am all in.

Virgil

Is the only one I've written with a queer headcanon, and it was unexpected and unplanned. He just started flirting with one of the staff in TSOF and I just listened to what he clearly wanted. In this moment, my headcanon is that he feels constantly surrounded by beauty of all forms, and so his attraction to people is based on their energy. He's pan in this AU and I do kind of love that for him. Just open with no reservations to gender. (Ev identifies as gay btw I case you are curious)

But I do also love the idea of a demi or grey Virgil, where it's not really in the cards for him until bonds of trust and love are formed and it's just ... oh! This is what I want.

For him and the rest of the boys, I really will read it all. Bi Gordon has resonated with me in my reading journey before, as has ace John and gay John.

I've had a few ideas as background in Thunderteers, but they've definitely not been fully designed yet - and again, romance is really not my wheelhouse so I don't know if it will come up.

But yeah. Not the most elaborate of pride posts at the moment, but I wanted to share and celebrate in the moments life let's me.

(And I wanna write.... WORK brain, come on)

[roadtogracelandx45]

Uncharted Waters| B. Sherman

Summary: Dewey is a well-known jerk within the Los Angeles police force and his family including his daughter Tess who has nothing to do with him until he gets shot and Chickie, his partner, calls her to let her know he has been hurt. A couple of weeks later, he is planning on retiring and Tess goes to the party and meets rookie cop Ben Sherman suddenly how Tess feels towards her father, Chickie and even John Cooper changes. 

Ben Sherman/ OFC 

Rated M for adult content

@marycorleone

Introduction 

Chickie sighed as she copied the number for Tessa Dudek, her partner's daughter from his phone to hers, she had been tasked with calling her and telling her father had been shot and was in surgery. And it was the last thing that she wanted to do. Dewey's relationship with not only Tessa but his wife had been strained, so much so that at 16, Tess cut him off only talking once or twice every few months, and even then it was strained and short. 

It had taken almost 4 years of Chickie and John Cooper working with him to find out that he had a daughter and that was only because he had to hunt her down. After all, she missed one of the twice-a-year meetings she had with both of her parents and his ex-wife and her mother freaked out so the three of them had to go hunt her down. 

They had found her of course, but the girl wasn't happy, she had slammed the door in Dewey's face after cussing him up one side and down the other. And personally, they found it funny that she did that. It was only fair that Dewey had someone who treated him how he treated others.

Taking another deep breath, she dialed the girl's phone number and was instantly met with a Hello. "Hey Tess, it's Chickie." "Oh hey Chickie, what's up?"  There was a lot of background noise and she wondered if Tessa was back to her old ways of working with adult entrainment and turning tricks, something that she and John swore they would never tell Dewey until they absolutely had to. 

"It's Dewey." 

"Oh?" 

The background noise faded slightly and the blonde officer was relieved, which meant she wouldn't have to shout to be heard, "he was shot, it doesn't look good." 

"And you are telling me this why? I don't have a relationship with him, you know that."

"I know kid, but he is your father, do you want him to die without trying to resolve what has happened in the past between  you two?"  

"I guess you are right, if anything it would be a good chance for me to tell him, I hate him."  Tess agreed, there were so many unresolved issues between them and so many things that she wanted to say to him but every time she saw him the anger took over and the curse words came out.

 "I will meet you there. Don't leave me alone with him Chickie, because I swear to god, he isn't dead, I will kill him myself."  "I will meet you downstairs," Chickie said before hanging up the phone, she was the only other officer who was there for Dewey and that was saying a lot.  People liked him when he was doing a drunken act but didn’t care enough to actually show up and hold virgle like she did. 

**

Ben Sherman glanced back at the doors that were swinging shut behind Chickie, there was a tall brunette who was going into the ICU waiting room. “Who is that?” He asked tearing his eyes away from the girl to Chickie who smirked, “Trust me it's not worth it.”  

Ben took one more glance over her head and then shook his head, if he wasn’t so exhausted he would go in there and talk to her.  “How is he?”

 “He will be okay.”  She gave a tired smile and went towards the exit ready to go home to her son. Deep down she had almost hoped Dewey would have died.

 This was a punishment of sorts. It had to be. 

 Ben glanced back at the girl before going into the waiting room.

***

"I must be dead." Dewey commented as he came back too, his daughter was sitting next to his bed, an open magazine on her lap and her lit-up cell phone in her hand, "I have to be because there is no way my daughter will be here under any other circumstances." 

"No, not dead but you should be." Tess returned as she snapped her phone shut and twisted to look at him, "Doc said they took 5 bullets out of you. Why weren't you wearing your vest?" 

Dewey groaned and reached to press the button for the nurse. He was going to be more medicated to listen to his daughter's bitching.

"Tess."

"Dewey."  

"Don't start."

She pulled a face and mimicked him, "What happened? All Chickie said was you responded to a disturbance that was it." 

"Why do you care?"  

Tessa flipped the magazine shut and reached for her bag that was on the window sill,  "See this is why I didn't want to come. Knew that our relationship was beyond repair. Told Chickie that. Told Charlene that. But they didn't want to listen. Told me it would be good to try. Said I should get to know my father. " 

The doctor came in with the nurse to check on him, "Glad you aren't dead. But kind of wish you were." She excused herself quickly from the room and went to exit to the waiting room. 

'Tess." Charlene started as she came back into the waiting room. 

"I got to go, Char, I was right he is never going to change." She returned. "Don't go back to work. Just go hang out in the waiting room."

 Charlene had been trying to talk Tess into quitting her nighttime jobs and going to school but the girl refused, repeating Dewey's statement about becoming a reporter. 

"Fine, I will hang out for a while longer."

**

Ben looked up when he heard the soft footsteps come into the waiting room, he had been expecting the mother of the girl that was asleep in the row of chairs near him but it was the girl he had seen in the hallway. 

"Hi.' He offered as she sat down a few seats away from him. "Hi.' She returned before glancing at the girl and then back at him, clearly curious about him.

 "Are you here for Dewey?" He asked. 'Yeah, you?" 

"Yeah, I was with him when he got shot."

"You are a cop?" 

He laughed almost bitterly, that was the third or fourth time he had heard that day and it wasn't getting any better. 

"I don't mean like that it's a bad thing. You are just too handsome to be a cop. Not like Dewey or Cooper."

"How do you know them?" He glanced at the sleeping girl one more time before turning fully to face the girl. 

She chewed on the inside of her cheek before answering, "Dewey is my father. I have known John since Dewey got settled into the same district." 

 "Dewey?" He repeated, "Dewey? Is your father?

" "In the loosest meaning of the term."  He laughed, he knew that feeling all too well, his own father was like that. Tessa felt a warm spread through her chest and she shook her head, she knew better than to get involved with anyone who wore uniforms, it usually ended up with her heartbroken and her going on a shopping spree. 

But like her father, Tess never ever learned. 

[sunnyie-eve]

14 | Trust

Series: Never Leave You | OBX

Paring: (JJ Maybank x OFC! Rafe Cameron x OFC!)

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: death, comforting, John B jealous, no secrets,

MASTERLIST

The next day Pope goes to visit his grandmother to ask about the key. Pope goes in to talk to her alone so the other five leave driving around close till they go back to pick him up. The girls go to get drinks while the boys wait in the van. Sarah and Kiara talk about their boy problems then say it's unfair Callie doesn't have any with JJ.

"The perfect couple." Kie smiles as they walk back to the boys.

"I don't have any problems with JJ... I do with your brother." Callie says so Sarah stops her.

"My brother? Rafe? You have problems with him?" She says super confused.

"Yeah, care to explain?" Kie eyes her.

"When you got back yesterday before I got stuff from home... I went to Rafe to give him a piece of my mind for trying to drown you. Also when I got flushed out of the sewer that was Rafe's doing. He thought you, JJ, and Pope were just down there. He felt bad when I told him it was just me down there."

"When did you guys have that conversation? When you went to go see him?" Kiara asks.

"No, it was later that night it happened. He snuck into my room because my window was unlocked..."

"How many times have you talked to Rafe alone after everything has happened?" Sarah asks Callie slightly annoyed.

Callie thinks back, "Five times." She says making the girls look at her, "The first time I went to go see my dad, Rafe was there and I slapped him. Later that same day he came by the house. Then the whole flushing me out thing. Umm, when I was running away I bumped into him and had a few words. Then when I went to go see him to give him a piece of my mind." She explains to them.

"I can't believe you talk to him." Kiara gets in the van.

"Talk to who?" JJ looks back at the three as they get in.

"Rafe." Kie eyes Callie.

"What?!" JJ raises his voice.

"It's nothing... Every time we talk I'm hitting him or shoving him away from me." Callie huffs.

"Has he tried kissing you again?" JJ asks her so they all look at her.

"Only two out of five times we've talked... the first two was in one day during the end of the summer when I went to go see my dad."

"You let Rafe kiss you?" Sarah laughs.

Callie stares at her, "No." She slightly lies laughing, "Why the hell would I let him kiss me? After everything? He's insane, Sarah."

After picking up Pope, he lets the group know everything being related to Denmark Tanny. As they all hang out they joke calling Pope royalty before Carla surprises them, and in exchange for the key, she hands over the recording to them. However, the key is fake and they rush to take the tape to Shoupe.

Once it was done for Ward, the boys, and Callie celebrated while Sarah and Kie watched. Sarah gets a call from Topper saying if she wants to talk to Ward, she better do it now since time is running out. As the group drives Sarah home, they see all the cop cars speeding there.

Ward was surrounded by the authorities and the group runs to watch. Ward yells Sarah shouldn't be there. Ward blows himself and his boat up. Sarah falls to pieces, and with John B and the others are stunned beyond belief. Topper goes to Sarah's side to comfort her while the others just watch still shocked.

Callie looks over at Sarah sobbing and felt bad for her because that was her father after all. For most of her life, he was a good father to her. JJ takes Callie's hand into his.

-

Callie walks up to the Cameron's place to go see Sarah knocking on the door and Rafe opens it, "Sarah left a few minutes ago. I know you aren't here for me." Rafe goes to shut the door so Callie stops it.

"As much as I hated your father and would've preferred to watch him rot in a cell next to you... I'm sorry for your loss. He was your father still. And I, at least hope when you were younger before you became a pain... you guys had a decent father and son relationship." She says making him look at her confused, "I'm not a monster, Rafe. I have empathy for people... even those who really don't deserve it." She gives him a sad smile.

"Rafe, who's at the..." Rose walks around the corner, "Callie." She looks at her.

"I came by to say sorry for your loss. The way that happened..." Callie starts to get glassy eyes picturing the scene again.

Seeing someone blow themselves up was something she would never get out of her head. But she couldn't decide if he deserved it or not because he murdered people and suicide was the easy way out for him to avoid the punishment for his actions.

"Thank you." Rose nods her head walking away knowing Callie actually meant her words.

"I should go back before the others wonder where I am." Callie turns to walk away.

When she walks out the gate Rafe rushes after her, "Callie, wait." He shouts making her turn around so he can hug her and she lets him.

"I have to go now, Rafe." She says after a few minutes of him just hugging her.

"Please don't leave me. Please don't leave like Sarah did. I don't have anyone but Wheezie now. I know I did a lot of bad shit. I've jumped your friends, I killed Peterkin, I almost killed you, and I almost killed my own sister...." He starts to tear up, "I know I can't change the past, but I'm gonna be different now. I'm sorry."

Callie just stares at him, "I believe you're sorry deep down but you being different is hard to believe, Rafe. It's not that easy, especially for you to do alone without getting help." She tells him truthfully.

"Then help me, please." He begs her grabbing her hands.

"Rafe... I don't know if I'm the right person for that. I still shouldn't even be here talking to you. I hate you but I don't hate you at the same time. Which makes me hate myself." Callie tears up.

"I just need a friend, Callie."

"I can't be that for to you for a while... I'm sorry, Rafe. I wish you luck." Callie leaves him standing alone wiping his tears away.

Callie swung by her place and it was just her aunt there, "Getting more clothes for John B's place?" Tess walks into the room.

"Yes."

"I know you're mad at me." Tess sighs.

"Of course, I am. Your sister moves back in and tries to be a parent to me again. Then you let Anna, the worst mother there is, try to talk you into sending me to boarding school with Kie. All we want to do is help our friends." Callie sighs as she puts clothes in her bag.

"I know. I'm just worried about your future, Callie. I want you to have a good one. Personally, I don't want you Kook but they could help you get there. But I know you won't because your heart belongs to a Pogue named JJ."

"You don't need to worry about me aunt Tess and yes, my heart belongs to JJ." Callie finishes up, "Now, I have to get going." Callie heads for the door.

"You're welcome back Callie. You don't have to run away."

"Actually, I do. I can't live with my mother." Callie leaves the house.

When she gets to John B's, he tells her that Sarah came by and broke up with him because of things and how he reacted to Ward dying.

"She'll come back around. She's one of us now." Callie says as it's just the both of them by the water.

"So you and JJ." John B looks at her.

"What about us?" She laughs at him with her feet in the water.

"You two are actually together now?" He eyes her.

"Yeah, we are." Callie smiles looking down at the water.

"I'm happy for you two. He deserves you." John B lets her know.

Callie watches him seeing him hiding something deep down, "You're keeping something to yourself. What is it?" She asks him.

"It's nothing important."

"Apparently it is if you're keeping it to yourself and not letting me know." She turns to face him.

"I really am happy for you two... it's just...younger me hurt deep down is hurt you kissed and are dating JJ over me." He sighs making Callie slightly laugh.

"But you aren't the younger you anymore, John B. I mean, I liked you when we were younger, I did but-,"

"But it's always been JJ who stole your heart?" He looks at her so she nods her head. "Don't think I'm not happy for you two or hate you guys together, I do love you both together."

"If I could heal younger you, I would kiss you back." She kisses his cheek but he grabs her face kissing her so she just gives him a kiss back quick so he will stop. It meant completely nothing to her since she didn't feel anything.

"Found them!" They hear Pope yell so Callie gets up leaving John B side going up towards JJ and Kie.

"Trying to cheer him up?" JJ wraps his arms around her.

"Yeah, he then asked about us. Said he's really happy for us."

"I think we're all happy you two are officially together. I better be the maid of honor for the wedding." Kiara heads inside to get some beer while JJ laughs.

"You okay?" JJ sees Callie's face.

"I don't want to keep secrets between us..." She looks up at him.

"I don't want to either. What is it?" He walks them over to sit in the hammock.

"Promise me, you won't get mad at me or anyone else." Callie puts her pinky finger out so he takes it. "Just now John B kissed me and to get it over with to heal young him I did like a kiss your grandma kiss." She spits out and JJ just nods his head.

"It meant nothing though right?"

"Of course not, I felt nothing with him compared to you."

"Anything else?" He asks.

"When you were ignoring me before school started and my dad just got back. The first day I went over to see him and Rafe was there... I accidentally spilled a huge secret to him and he when he was comforting me he kissed me. Except this time I kissed him back before I realized what I was so rushing home."

"You kissed Rafe back?" JJ stares at her. "What was your secret he comforted you about for you to kiss his ass back?" JJ gets slightly upset.

Callie starts to tear up not wanting to say it again and on purpose this time, "I slipped that Joey raped me."

The slight anger in JJ disappears from her kissing Rafe to what Joey did to her.

"Please don't hate me for this next part." She grabs his hand. "Later that same night I was home alone drinking and getting high because I wanted to relax. Will was back, you were ignoring me, I spilled my biggest secret, I kissed Rafe, and I was stressed with everything. Rafe ended up coming by wanting to talk about earlier but I didn't want to... so I told him to kiss me again. He didn't want to because of the state I was in. I told him to kiss me or get out of the house so he kissed me and things happened."

"So you hooked up with Rafe?" He asks but wasn't mad at her.

"I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. We weren't together and you were going through a lot of things. I'm not mad at you, Callie." He squeezes her hand.

"You should be. I hooked up with Rafe. Out of everyone on this island, I picked the worst person. After everything."

"Callie, I'm not mad and I'm not going to be. I can't be because you actually told me. You didn't keep it to yourself. I know I can trust you."

[gloriousprincesscreature]

This is how I spend a weekend

I watched Minority Report on Friday night although I had a strong hunch that I would Not Like it, because Tom Cruise is smoking hot in it. Turns out, I did not like it, but Tom Cruise was hot. Absolutely no regrets.

And then I spent the entire Saturday thinking about the blocking and set design in Minority Report, woke up at 3am and couldn't get back to sleep. So I went back and watched thirty more minutes of grey dreck just so that I could stare at Tom's beautiful face and on Sunday morning I am exhausted.

Now its 3pm on Sunday and ... I am rewatching the rest of Minority Report because TC is positively glowing in every shot he appears in.

I don't know what it is about this guy, there's just something magical that draws the eye to his face at the exclusion of everything else on the screen.

Observation 1: He can do the subtle eyes shimmering with tears really well. We don't even know what really happened with John's son the first two times this expression appears and I am already sad because I'm empathizing Hard, and hey, I am a deeply unemotional person due to being dead inside. OCD and a lousy job will do that to a person. But I'm also terribly, terribly aroused. The script is thin with regard to John's character but TC's vulnerability and the thin, almost bruised-looking skin under his eyes just Does Things to me.

Observation 2: He can't convey anger with depth. It's just shouting.

SPOILERS AHEAD. If you can even spoil a twenty year old movie. Maybe with expensive vacations and designer lingerie. I'm too poor to have ever tried.

Observation 3: The movie is better on a second watch. I can mentally filter out the silly comedic/action elements that should not have been there in the first place. Without them it's a straight up neo-noir in the vein of LA Confidential. Just as in LA Confidential, there's a Twink (Danny Witwer/Colin Farrell), an evil authority figure, and a beautiful, deeply tormented, emotionally repressed cop.

Observation 4: TC's eyebrows and hair have never looked better.

Observation 5: John Anderton is in love with Lamar Burgess. Of this much I am sure. He saves his only real smile for Lamar and ... hahahaha ... we all know what happens next.

I'm replaying bits of this compulsively. Something intensely fucked up and loving happened between these two men.

"Remember, the eyes ... the eyes of the nation are on us right now. And we both know, I'm not the generation anyone listens to, but people trust you, John. When you speak of your absolute belief in pre-crime, they know its a belief born of pain, not politics. I always understood that, and I may have even encouraged it, to help with the cause. [Deep sigh] But now, your pain is hurting both of us."

Lamar meets John eyes briefly before looking away. John has been looking at Lamar the whole time. John continues to gaze at Lamar with so. much. Love. Concern. And all these feelings just getting in the way of what is So Obvious to Us. Lamar is hiding something. John is honest.

"They're not gonna take it away from us. [long pause. Continues to stare into the face of his Beloved/Teacher/Saviour/Master. Makes a vow] I won't let them."

We stay with this moment for awhile before cutting away (BUT NOT LONG ENOUGH). Which is (still) lovely and a lot of modern films don't do this.

I think, I think this is the most intimate, personal interaction in this movie. Minority Report is poxy with zooming camera, overbearing soundtrack, office environments. But when Lamar and John speak, its quiet and the camera just stops fucking around and doesn't get in the way.

Max von Sydow is class. He's inherently slinky and he purrs.

These two minutes hold the seeds (or fragments? fragments) of a much better movie.

At this moment, I don't know if Tom Cruise can Act, but that face was carved by the Gods.

*deep sigh*

I can't finish the rewatch.

[sincerelyjxyy]

Gold Rush - Six

Invisible String - Gold Rush

Chapter Six - Before Giving Up My Aches

Song of The Chapter - You Belong With Me

✧ i don't want to beg. i know you can feel it, my longing, the aching, my need for love. i don't want to beg. but oh god-oh god, please. please. love me. love me. — a.m, desperation sits heavy on my tongue ✧

Summary: Josie's emotions are at an all time overflow as she tries to cope with watching her best friend stick a a weapon to someone's head and her consistent lying to her mother. But there's no time to stop, as she and the pogues revisit the wreckage to find out why everyone on the island is looking for it. Whatever it is, it seems to be worth someone trying to kill them.

Word Count: 13.9k

Gold Rush Masterlist

AFTER THE KEGGER, THE POGUES HEADED TO THEIR OWN HOMES TO GIVE THEMSELVES MUCH-NEEDED SPACE. When each of them woke the next morning, the weight of what had happened sat heavy on their shoulders. Just like always, word spread quickly, and it was only a matter of time before everyone knew about a pogue shooting a gun off at the beach.

Josie spent most of the morning in Kiara's bedroom, listening as her friend ranted about how stupid and ridiculous boys were. Especially the ones they chose to associate with.

The group gathered at the Chateau that afternoon, unsure of how to bring up what'd happened. Tensions were still simmering, though lighter, as they all tiptoed around the seriousness of the incident. But once John B informed them about the visit he'd received from Sheriff Peterkin, it was clear that they'd have to face reality head-on.

Apparently, Peterkin had a suspicion that they'd found the wreck, as well as knowing that it was JJ who'd fired the gun at the Boneyard. Red flashing lights blared in Josie's brain as she considered the implications of being involved, now that the sheriff knew.

John B could be in trouble. JJ could be in trouble. Her mother could find out.

Her heart rate hadn't completely settled as they congregated at the mini-shack. John B filling them in on his morning with the Sheriff only aided Josie's paranoia about getting caught.

JJ, who'd been acting weird the entire day, sat away on a stray table by himself as he threw rocks out into the grass. Josie watched Kie tap at some bongos while she tried to strum a ukulele, reading notes that Kie had jotted down for her. Pope tried to catch up on some summer reading, which Josie had all but forgotten about over the past few days.

"Look, I'm callin' it off. Alright?" John B called after a while, gathering their attention. "Peterkin said, if I stay out of the marsh, she'll help me with DCS."

Josie understood his caution; it was as much of a concern for all of them as it was for John B. They were a team—a family—and being sent away to foster care on the mainland was not an option. No one was going to separate them, especially not some mainlander.

"And you believed her?" JJ questioned, notoriously one to never trust a cop.

"Yes, I believe her, JJ," John B countered. His tone was indicative of the fact that he was unwilling to discuss any other alternatives. Rightfully so, since he was being threatened with forceful removal from his home.

And he had a point; she was the sheriff.

"An actual cop, John B. You believed a cop." JJ breathed out a cynical laugh. He angrily threw another rock out into the distance.

Josie couldn't entirely fault him either. One of the only things JJ had ever known was to always have his guard up. He was taught to never trust a word any authoritative figure said. The Maybanks didn't exactly have the best record with cops—that was no secret. She knew that Luke's constant back-and-forth from jail only aided in JJ's distrust of police.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he blamed them for being the jackasses that pulled apart parents and kids, no matter how illegal the shit his father did was.

Fucking Luke Maybank.

"All I gotta do is stay out of the marsh for a couple days, and she'll help me out," John B angrily stated. He threw the walking stick he'd been fidgeting with down on the ground, and Josie nudged it away from her foot. "It doesn't help that your ass was the one who was shooting the gun."

Even though she'd been trying to avoid the argument, Josie couldn't help but wince as John B blamed JJ. The last thing she wanted was to think back on arguably one of the scariest nights of her life. How were any of them supposed to easily claim there was no gun, when the person who held the weapon was one of their own?

"You know what I should've done, man? I should've just let Topper drown your ass." JJ critically shook his head, as if he couldn't believe John B wasn't grateful for what he'd done. Josie stared at her best friend as if he'd grown an extra head. How could he still not see why what he'd done was fucked up?

She knew how, of course. He was too stubborn and prideful. It was still stupid.

"Yeah, because Topper was gonna drown me?" John B was unconvinced that the kook was capable of doing such a thing, but Josie firmly disagreed. None of them really knew what his actions would've been had things gone differently.

"Sure looked like it," JJ rebutted as he stood from the table. Josie sighed, leaning down to place her head in her hands.

John B let out a sarcastic laugh. "That's really funny."

"Have you looked in the mirror lately?" JJ interrupted to counter him, motioning to his eye as he approached the group.

John B's left eye sported a gnarly-looking purple bruise around it, a clear indication of where Topper had gotten a few good hits in. Josie had watched as it formed that night, when she'd held an ice pack to it as they frantically drove back to the Chateau. But that was when it was fresh.

The bruise was vibrant and present in the light of the afternoon sun.

"John B..." Josie sighed as she looked up at him, and he stared down at her expectantly. She could tell he was annoyed that she'd decided to take JJ's side, though not uncommonly, and was seemingly going to defend his inexcusable actions.

"You didn't see the way Topper was holding you down. I know I joke about it, but you don't actually have nine lives. The way he held you under the water...it really looked like he was going to drown you."

John B rolled his eyes through a scoff, glancing around like Josie had said the most absurd thing ever.

"I'm not saying what JJ did wasn't stupid, because it definitely was." She turned to critically glare at the blond, only briefly. "I'm just saying that it really did look like something bad was going to happen."

She hoped that John B could see just how uneased she was by the situation. It was more complex than just: this is wrong, this is right.

"Jose, I know you hate the guy's guts, but so do I. You don't see me claiming he's capable of murder." John B sternly stared down at her, arms crossed over his chest.

She scoffed at the insinuation, looking down at her hands in embarrassment and leaning back in her chair. Did he really not see that it was so much more than a childhood rivalry? Why couldn't he just consider the real physical consequences that could've taken a turn for the worse?

"They always win, don't they, man?" JJ leaned his left arm up against the post behind Josie's chair, gaze skimming over the group. The question was rhetorical, of course. Just JJ pointing out what they already knew.

Kooks were always one step ahead, and they never had to face any of the consequences those from The Cut did.

"Kooks versus pogues. They always, always win." He hit one of the hanging decorations and turned to walk away in frustration. "Goddamn!"

"Look, it's okay!" Kie reasoned, turning to her redheaded friend for help.

Josie watched as JJ whipped around frustratedly. "No, it's not okay! It is not!" His emphasis held clear irritation. Josie looked up at him sympathetically as he marched back to the group.

She offered an understanding gaze and stuck out her right hand, which he took with zero hesitation. He animatedly moved the other hand as he spoke. "They don't want us to go down into the marsh. That means there's something valuable down there, and you know it, man." He pointed at John B, who rolled his eyes at his friend's spouting. "I know you do."

The blond scrutinized Pope. "And I understand why you don't wanna go. You're the golden boy. You got way too much to risk. And you two-" He motioned his and Josie's conjoined hands toward the girls. "I mean, you're both already rich as fuck anyway. Why would you bother?"

The girls shared an eye roll, and Josie bitterly removed her hand from his as she withdrew eye contact. She never enjoyed having that conversation with him, and it was no different around the rest of their friends. It was the only thing about JJ that Josie genuinely could never accept: his preconceived opinion that she might think herself better than him because of their financial statuses.

On many drunken nights, JJ had confessed that he believed Josie sometimes saw him as the gum on the bottom of her shoe—or at least should see him that way. But even when he was sober, Josie could catch fleeting resentment behind his eyes when he was reminded that they were, in fact, from different sides of the island. She'd cried many nights over such discussions, holding her pillows close as she prepared for the worst—when their friendship would finally collapse from the weight of their differences.

And yet, in spite of all of that, they were best friends. So yes, it stung when he condescendingly spoke to the girls as if they both wouldn't risk their lives for them.

JJ turned back to John B. "But you and me, man, we got nothin' to lose!"

John B once again rolled his eyes in exasperation, sighing out the blond's name, but no longer seemed entirely unwilling. JJ's dramatics were slowly getting to him. "We really don't, alright? And I know, it didn't used to be that way for you."

Josie's eyes shut, and she willed herself not to think too much about Big John's disappearance. How she and Kiara hadn't been there when John B had lost the most important person in his life.

Big John's disappearance had absolutely taken its toll on John B, despite his insistence that he was fine. Josie had seen it in the way he'd never open or even look at his father's office door. Or the way he sometimes looked at Papa Heyward as if he were seeing someone else. When he sometimes grew quiet on the boat as they navigated around the island, staring out into the ocean as if it would give him the answer he was searching for.

Her heart broke for him. She understood what it was like to search for answers—for someone—that wouldn't come.

The reminder struck something in John B as he shook his head. "I don't wanna talk about this. I don't wanna talk about it." He moved to withdraw from the group, but JJ stood solid.

"So that's it?"

"Dude, just get outta my way, bro." John B pushed JJ out of his path, ducking under the ornaments and walking away to get space. His tone was final as he tried to let the wind blow away his complex thoughts, but JJ was not backing down that easily.

The blond followed to where John B stood. "John B, listen to me. I have a plan."

His claim caused the other three pogues to share a skeptical look. It wasn't always a good outcome when it came to JJ's plans.

JJ wrapped his arm around John B's shoulder in determination. Insistent, he slightly leaned down to make direct eye contact with John B. "You got the key to Cameron's big boat, right? There's scuba gear inside, man. We just borrow that, and then we go down to the wreck this afternoon, and that is what's gonna save you, man."

Josie was appalled that his solution was to do more illegal shit, but she was not at all surprised.

She watched JJ pull out the familiar persuasion card as he spoke to his friend. "You don't see rich kids going into foster care, do you?"

Hook, line, and sinker.

John B looked over at JJ, mental debate flashing across his expression, before his shoulders sagged and he turned to the rest of them. "Guess I'm the one stealing the gear, then?"

Josie leaned back in her chair exasperated, rubbing her hand against her wrinkled forehead and catching the sympathetic look Kiara shot at her. The last thing the redhead needed was a problem with Ward Cameron, mainly because she knew the man quite well.

Her mother was quite literally his lawyer.

Even if it was just John B that Ward caught, word could easily spread to her mother. It would only give Petunia that much more ammunition in her attempts to keep Josie from the pogues. Not that it was the biggest concern there, but it still sat fresh in her mind.

She let out a bitter sigh and nodded, harshly setting the ukulele on a nearby surface as she stood. Her gaze wandered to JJ, who sported a fresh grin as he and John B walked back to join the group. She narrowly glared his way, clearly still not over his blatant disrespect toward her.

She could acknowledge that maybe she was being dramatic, but her head felt like it was going to explode. The boys had hurt her feelings, not to mention she was emotional because of the whole day she'd had before that one, and her lies felt like they were just piling up. She was sure she would combust from the emotions begging to be let out of her chest. So, she felt a little justified for some slight dramatics.

She needed to schedule an appointment with her therapist.

Josie shot Kiara a vexed look, not toward her but instead at the two recluses. Grabbing her backpack, she shrugged and glanced at the boys. "Just meet me at the docks...I need a sec." She turned to address Kie and Pope. "Love you."

She took off to march toward the Jeep, ignoring the sounds of confusion that audibly left her blond best friend. He looked around at the others helplessly, but Kie shrugged as she watched Josie go. She couldn't blame her for wanting to take a time-out, and she wasn't going to try and stop her friend from deciding to protect her mental wellbeing.

JJ vigorously disagreed with that perspective, scrambling to follow the girl stomping away from them.

Josie chose to ignore the hasty sounds of leaves crunching under the footsteps behind her. She'd made it about seventy-five percent of the way to her car before a hand took hold of her wrist. She ripped it away and turned to face the culprit.

Obviously, she knew it was JJ. He didn't need to say anything, and she didn't even have to see him to know. The pull they shared with one another was enough to tell.

It was like they had a tether that glowed brightly within their souls when they were with each other. And when they were apart, it was like a bright light that guided them back toward the safety of the other.

She just knew.

JJ wasn't fazed by her obvious annoyance at his touch. He instead reached out hold her shoulders, bending down to meet her eyesight. "C'mon, Jose, are you really gonna leave without tellin' me you love me? Plus, you gotta tell me why you're mad."

He smirked, his knowing eyes beaming. "I know you're dying to say something."

Josie peaked back at her friends behind him, watching as they gathered their own things and discussed the plan further. Her eyes hesitantly moved back to JJ, and she gently pushed his arms off her shoulders. While she may have been confused and contemplative of her own feelings, she didn't want to be an ass to her friends.

And she especially didn't want to act awful toward the most important person in her life, despite his mishap and her subsequent irritation.

She sighed and recollected her thoughts. "Honestly, Jay, I just need a few minutes to drive and be alone. Just tell John B to pick me up once he grabs y'all from here." She went to turn around, but he beat her to it, moving in front of her and blocking her path.

"Okay, then let me come with. We'll play some Taylor, and I'll be totally silent." He pretended to zip his lips shut and held two fingers toward her as if he were giving her the key. She pushed his hand away, shaking her head in finality.

"No, JJ, I mean it. I want to be alone."

She tried not to let the defeated look that crossed his golden features trouble her, touching his arm as she passed and continued on to the Jeep. She reminded herself not to turn back and look at him. If she saw the look on his face, she knew she'd give in and stay there with the rest of them.

As she approached the Jeep, she reached into her bag to pull out her keys. She went to open the door, but was slightly startled by a hand reaching out by her left side and pulling the door open. She glanced up to meet a pair of apologetic blue eyes staring back at her.

Josie offered a small, tight-lipped, grateful smile and climbed into the Jeep. He shut the door behind her and tapped the open window as he leaned into it. She placed her bag in the seat beside her, avoiding his eyes as she cranked the car. She sat both hands on the steering wheel to try and keep her fingers busy and her mind distracted.

"Jose."

It was rare that JJ used his soft and small voice, which easily convinced Josie to look over at him. Her green eyes searched his as he smiled at her. His blue gaze was gentle as he reached into the car and squeezed her arm.

"I know I'm a dick, alright? What I said back there, 'm sorry. 'Course I know you bother with us because you care." He reached out to impishly poke her cheek, causing her to turn to him, unimpressed.

Still, she sent him a gentle smile as she playfully grabbed his hand from her face. "You're right, you are a dick." She shrugged plainly, but her breath of laughter reassured him that her annoyance wasn't irreversible. "It's fine, really. I just need to figure out my own issues on top of all this." She released his hand to motion at their surroundings.

He huffed out a laugh, leaning an arm on the top of the door as he admired her soft smile. Josie had to beat down the part of her that closely monitored the movements of his muscled arms, while also trying not to focus too much on the gentle smile he sent back to her.

"You sure you don't want me to come? I can be a good listener."

Josie laughed sarcastically, poking fun at the claim that JJ could do anything other than talk someone's ear off. She nodded at him doubtfully and patted his hand resting on the window crack. "I'll see you in a bit, love you."

She gave him time to back away from the car, before she made her way out of John B's makeshift driveway and down the main road of The Cut. She maneuvered to dig her phone from her pocket, trying to multitask as she drove and connected the aux cord. After a few struggles, she was finally able to get it playing.

As Taylor sang about how content she was in her relationship, Josie couldn't help but admire the silence that otherwise filled the car. The past few days had been full of commotion, and so suddenly she was left with only the soothing melody of New Year's Day.

If she was at home, she was constantly bombarded by her family and only truly alone when she was asleep. If she was hanging out with the pogues, she was almost never alone. Josie would never complain about being with her friends. She'd never consider it a terrible thing to be surrounded by the ones she loved.

But even so, she hadn't had any time to herself.

Even when she was in the car, someone almost always accompanied her. She hadn't even thought to take the time while driving to digest all of her jumbled feelings—to comb through them to try and accept the weight of her situation. Her lies were piling up fast.

The fact of the matter was that she was digging herself a grave too deep to climb out of. It'd only grown worse when summer started and she no longer had the excuse of being at school to distract her mother. And that could only last for so long, given that the coming year would be the last before they graduated.

She was getting older, and the pogues were slowly experiencing the reality of maturity and growing up. With that came the expectation that she was, to some extent, supposed to adopt the responsibility of choosing to do the right thing.

Her mother had always imposed the belief that before her children turned eighteen, they were expected to do everything absolutely right. That way, they wouldn't have to experience the same life their father had growing up. They were to grow up pristine in the community's eyes, making their mother look like the fiercest and most successful parent. Because that was what mattered to Petunia Shoupe at the end of the day—success in the eyes of others.

And then, when they were eighteen, they were to graduate college and get into only the best of the best colleges. They'd do what their mother had decided to be the correct career path for them and finish it to become the best in whatever field she'd chosen. They'd eventually pop out a few legitimate grandchildren for her. It was the natural cycle of what was expected from Josie and her siblings.

And yet there she was, less than a year from turning eighteen, doing absolutely nothing but feeding her mother lie after lie.

It wasn't just about the pogues. She still hadn't told her mother about Chapel Hill or about her knowledge of her father's return to the island. How was Josie supposed to say something when she could barely get a word out without her mother's incessant need to control the outcome?

Josie's neurotic behavior had to have come from somewhere.

Still, Josie wasn't a liar; at least, she didn't like to think of herself that way. She felt everything fully and outwardly, completely aware that her emotions heavily controlled her life. And even though her mother was a shitty person, she was still her mother. Lying to Petunia felt like spitting in her face and telling her that she could jump off a cliff.

Then there was the flip side to that coin, because how else could she continue to be around her friends? The friends to whom she bared her soul; who knew her better than her own family. The same friends whom her mother despised with a burning passion.

Petunia Shoupe had made it very clear when Josie had started high school that any relationships with pogues were to be left behind in her adolescence. The real world would have no tolerance for those financially inferior to them.

Ultimately, it was her choice to continuously hide things from her mother. She could tell them all right now that she didn't want to participate in any illegal activities anymore and walk away. It would hurt more than anything to pull away from them, but she could do it if she really wanted to. But then where would that leave her? Applying to colleges she didn't want to go to and losing her support system?

It was the exact thing she'd been trying to avoid.

JJ's sudden intent on tenaciously trying to one-up the kooks was no help either. Shooting that gun just emphasized the fact that they would all soon have to deal with very real, very intense decisions and their consequences. He was also getting older, and with that came making his own choices on right and wrong. Josie couldn't hold his hand and guide him in her direction forever, especially not when she went off to college. He was a big boy who was going to have to guide himself.

She just wasn't sure she was ready or willing to face what that meant.

In hindsight, she didn't have many options to consider, causing Josie to hit her steering wheel in frustration. She had to simply accept the fact that, until she was eighteen, she had to continue lying to her mother and living the only life she was given. As frustrating and complicated as it was, she would do everything she could to keep her friendships.

On the way, she made a stop at Kat's Deli to pick up a food and make a bathroom stop, knowing they probably wouldn't have anything left on the boat. Driving across the island, she made sure to take extra caution as she ate her sub.

Pulling into Heyward's parking lot, she took her time to finish her food in her car. She knew Pope's dad wouldn't really mind her parking there, despite what he might say. She was his favorite of Pope's friends, and he'd affectionately taken the place of a paternal figure after hers disappeared.

Once she was finished, she unplugged her phone from the aux and grabbed her backpack from the passenger seat, pulling her earbuds from the pocket. She didn't want to give anyone a reason to speak to her, so she stuck them in as she jumped out.

As she walked down the docks, she could overhear fits of laughter from passersby. Usually, she would've completely ignored the obnoxious bursts from some random group of teens. But she recognized one of the laughs very clearly.

Her gaze drifted upward to observe the group of people making their way past her, green eyes immediately connecting with deep brown ones. They shined brightly accompanied by gleeful laughter, and Josie couldn't help but feel a bit jealous. Max hadn't looked that happy around her in weeks.

He stopped as soon as he caught sight of her, which caused the group around him to pause. They voiced their confused concern, following his gaze to the girl that stood in front of them. She tried to ignore their harsh glares, knowing that she'd forever made her bed the moment she chose which side of the island to make friends with.

"Why don't you guys go ahead? I'll catch up." He patted Topper's shoulder assuredly. The rest of the group silently made sure he was certain, which he confirmed with a wave of his hand.

Josie tried to subdue the sad bitterness that filled her chest.

From the corner of her eyes, she could see Topper glaring at her as they passed by. Without even glancing in his vicinity, she only offered him her middle finger.

After a few moments, she peeked behind her to make sure they were out of earshot. She took the silent air pods out of her ears and stuffed them back into her bag, gaze flickering from her bag and back to Max. Slowly, they approached one another with tense awkwardness, uncertain of what to say. Josie couldn't help but feel extremely guilty when she considered that she hadn't thought once to call him and work things out after their fight.

"So..." She threw her thumb over her shoulder, sending Max an aggrieved smile. "You guys going somewhere?"

He avoided her eyesight, nodding and clearing his throat as he looked down at their shoes. Apparently, they were much more interesting than her. "Yeah. Yeah, uh, we were just going by the Wreck to grab something." He motioned toward the building down the way behind her, before pointing toward the docks she'd been approaching. "You?"

"Uh, yeah. Just going out on the boat with Kie-"

"You mean Kie, Pope, John B, and JJ," he condescendingly interrupted. His brows rose accusingly as he finally made eye contact with her. He scoffed as he pinched the bride of his nose, and Josie had to refrain from audibly reacting to the voice in her brain that scolded him for it.

He was obviously annoyed, and the mood immediately shifted.

"I can't believe you—they literally held a gun to Topper's head last night, Josephine. Maybank was going to shoot him."

"Topper was drowning John B," Josie sharply countered.

Max laughed out in disbelief, shaking his head. He stepped back, bewildered, to scrutinize her. "I cannot believe you're actually defending him."

"I'm not defending anyone, Max. I'm simply saying that it's a bit hypocritical for you to hold a grudge against JJ when your friends are just as bad."

"Oh, so now this is about my friends?" Max pointed at himself, glaring down at her with narrowed eyes.

Josie shrugged, peevishly pursing her lips. "Isn't it always?"

"Okay, you want to talk about your friends? Fine. Let's talk about the fact that you've been going behind your mom's back to hang out with them. Does that not clue you in that maybe, just maybe, you should get better friends? Friends that don't walk around like they can do whatever they want, or aren't assholes who meddle in your relationship?" Max animatedly waved around as he spoke, pointing out the exact things Josie constantly worried about.

"My friends are assholes? Have you met Topper Thornton, or Rafe Cameron, or really any of the people you hang out with?" Josie motioned back toward the group that had passed from sight. Even though Rafe Cameron wasn't an current occupant of that group, she was still in her right mind to lump all of them together.

"No, see, the difference is that my friends don't give a damn that I'm dating you. Do they like you? Not particularly. But none of them have ever, not once, tried to convince me to break up with you, not even Topper. Because they have enough respect to stay out of our relationship."

Josie rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest, clearly frustrated. "How could they like me, Max? They're fucking kooks! My friends have every right to be apprehensive about you because of how shitty they're treated by them on a daily basis!"

"Well, newsflash, Josephine, but you're a kook too! Jesus Christ. I mean, maybe, if you actually took the effort to get to know my friends, you'd find that you might share something in common."

Not likely.

"But I don't know them, Max. Just like you don't really know the pogues. Because instead of properly spending time together and integrating our friends like a normal relationship, lately all we do is argue! And I get it. I know that sometimes my friends can be a lot, and I know that they aren't the easiest to deal with. But you haven't exactly been a ray of sunshine either!" She paused to try and keep her emotions together.

"I want to be able to talk to you and tell you the things I'm going through, but you never seem to want to listen! It's always you, you, you, but it should be about us. I want to try with each other's friends. I want to have celebrations in which our friends can at least be in the same vicinity without fights breaking out. I want a relationship where we can just enjoy each other's company. I'm just not sure that's what you want anymore!" Josie's voice broke in desperation, her emotions from the past few days spilling over her waterlines.

She reached up to quickly wipe them away and suppress her sensitive display, but Max had already seen it. He uncrossed his arms with a sigh, and for a moment, he glanced up at the sky, before he shook his head. He made his way toward her and wrapped her in an embrace, which she immediately accepted. She lifted her arms to wrap around his neck, and his curled around her torso.

Her desperation to be held always outweighed any negative feelings she had.

She hid her face in his neck as stray tears fell into the collar of his shirt. She pulled him further into her, desperate for the warmth and comfort that encompassed her. She lifted a hand to run over the hair on the back of his head, placing a gentle kiss on his neck.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be a baby."

He pulled her form tighter as he rested his cheek on her head. He placed a gentle kiss on her hair, and she closed her eyes to bask in the feeling. She listened to his gentle shushing as he rubbed a hand up and down the small of her back.

"I'm sorry, too. I've had a lot to do with the distance between us recently." He pulled back from her and lifted his tanned hands to cradle her jaw. His thumbs gently ran over the tear streaks that stained down her cheeks, wiping them away as he gazed down at her.

"I've been forcing you into something you're not ready for yet. I've been an absolute asshole. And y'know what?" Josie attentively raised her brow at him.

"You're completely right. We haven't been spending enough time together, and we haven't been talking out our problems. But I promise that is going to change. First thing tomorrow, I'm coming by your house, and we're going to spend the entire morning together. I'll take you out for breakfast, okay?" He tilted her head up to look at him.

He leaned down to press the sides of their noses together, smiling as Josie closed her eyes to stop more tears from escaping. "And we can talk about how we're gonna start making an effort, with all of our friends."

Josie nodded and opened her eyes to smile up at him. She just wanted them to try, just try, to make it work. She wanted to be able to go to him about her problems and feel safe knowing he'd support her. She wanted the partnership and companionship she craved from him. She cared about him so much; he was her first boyfriend. And she so desperately wanted to be able to see it through.

To prove that love doesn't have to be complicated.

She lifted herself off her toes to close their small distance and pushed their lips together, gripping at his wrists that still held her jaw. Their lips moved against one another in sync, not having to worry about things as trivial as secrecy.

Max moved his hands to cradle the back of her head, and the movement caused Josie to giggle into the kiss. He leaned into her form, tilting her back a bit as he towered over her. Teeth clashed through smiles and chuckles as she wrapped her arms around his torso, palms flat against his back.

She laughed out as he moved away to place short kisses all over her face. He kissed her temple, her cheeks, the corners of her mouth, her nose, her jaw, her eyebrows, and anywhere else he could reach. She squirmed, full of glee, as he made obnoxiously wet kiss noises while assaulting her face. She jokingly tried to push him off, to no avail.

She couldn't help but feel like this was what love was supposed to be. Freeing and forgiving.

Their playful session was interrupted by the sound of a nearby whistle, grabbing both teens' attention as they surveyed the dock for the culprit. It was only moments before Josie saw the boat that slowly neared them, four pogues intensely watching the couple. Three of the four sported rather scornful glares.

Josie sighed and gently shrugged her boyfriend away, grabbing both of his hands and lifting to her toes to quickly peck his lips. "See you tomorrow, then?"

He smiled and leaned down to return a kiss of his own, letting it last a little longer, and pulled only inches away from her face. "Tomorrow, breakfast. Eight sharp, no later."

Josie hummed and sent him a sweet, close-lipped smile before breaking away toward her friends.

"I'll call you tonight!"

She nodded back at him, sending a small wave and moving down the closest dock. She watched as he started back on his path toward the Wreck, smiling as she noticed the pep in his step.

She waited and smiled as her unusually quiet friends approached, until she noticed the boys squinting up at her in a bit of disdain. She tried her best not to physically squirm at the stares, and instead kept her focus trained on a welcoming Kiara.

Once they got to her, JJ apathetically reached out for her hand, helping her step off the dock and into the boat without issue. He quickly let go once she was steady, pursing his lips and nodding. "Alone, huh?"

Her eyebrows furrowed as he walked away from her. She shook her head, perplexed at the insinuation that she couldn't seek out company from someone who wasn't JJ, or the other pogues. Especially considering that someone was her boyfriend.

She rolled her eyes and moved to Kie, removing her bag to set it down by her friend's. She plopped herself on the seat next to her, and Kie gave her a sympathetic look in return. Josie questioningly glanced over at Pope, who sighed and shrugged as if to say he was only doing it because the other two were. John B and JJ shot her tight-lipped smiles but otherwise refused to look at her.

And without another word, they were off to the marsh.

The first few hours were spent basking in the time for themselves, fishing for drum, and chilling around on the boat. But it was easy to tell that they were all focused on something else entirely, and it wasn't long before the lines were pulled in and they began their real journey.

They navigated toward where they'd found the sunken boat the day before. The water had considerably risen since they'd been out there, fixing a small amount of what had been previously affected by Hurricane Agatha.

Once they found the correct spot, they investigated the scuba gear John B had taken from the Druthers.

"This is empty. You took empty tanks?" Kie criticized John B as she checked the meters. She passed the empty valve to Josie, who double-checked it and sighed in defeat. John B stuttered to find a reply, well aware of how dumb it'd been.

Kie checked the second one. "Okay, this one's a quarter full," she offered. "It's enough for one of us."

"Love it when a plan comes together," Pope sarcastically voiced, arms crossed on his thighs. He had a point; this was set up for ultimate failure. The risk factor was quite obvious, and sending one of them down in a quarter-full tank wasn't very reassuring.

"Does anybody know how to dive?" Kiara inquired, only to receive an awkward silence. Everyone glanced around to gauge if any of them had experience, pointing to one another. "Anybody?"

Josie had taken a class when she was in the sixth grade. But she'd been more focused on leaving the lesson to play pirates with her friends than retaining any information. She never attended any follow-up classes.

"It's kind of a kook sport," JJ responded. It was almost ironic, given the fact that all of them were water bugs and yet none of them knew how to properly dive.

"I...read about it," Pope offered. Josie chuckled and leaned up to pat his back, and he turned to smile at her in solidarity.

Kie huffed out sarcastically. "Great, Pope read about it, so someone's gonna die."

"Look, y-you put the thing in your mouth and breathe. How hard could it be?" JJ's gaze scanned all of them. Clearly, he was unaware of the ramifications of an inexperienced, unsafe dive.

"If you come up too fast, nitrogen gets into your blood, and you get the bends," Pope stated matter-of-factly. Josie scrunched her face and nodded in agreement. She'd read quite a bit about divers who'd died from the aftershocks of decompression sickness.

"Bends, like, bend over and..." JJ bent over in a clearly sexual position, and Josie had to hide a snort of laughter behind her hand. Only JJ.

To cover her laughter, she interrupted his display. "In 1840, British soldier Charles Pasley reported that all the men who'd made frequent dives to recover the sunken warship HMS Royal George had contracted the bends, aka decompression sickness. It killed all of them."

The blond's face sank in realization, and he stood back to his height with a nod. "Right."

Josie shook her head and glanced over at Kiara. "I'll do it. We all know I can hold my breath the longest anyway. If anything happens, I can take it off and come up slowly. Plus, I took a class when I was like eleven." She grimaced. "Should just come back to me like riding a bike, right?"

"Nope, 'm not good with that one." JJ shook his head and tapped the metal of the steering wheel's windshield. His gaze met her offended one for the first time since she'd boarded the boat, and he shrugged obstinately.

"No, I can-I can dive," John B offered assuredly toward the redhead across the boat. He seemed to be sure of himself, but Josie still shot him a skeptical look. There was no way.

"Yeah, you can dive. I'm cool with that."

Josie indignantly scoffed and raised her hands as she questioningly glared at the blond boy. Was he really so upset with her that he was going to stop her from helping? Why was he okay with John B going down there and not her? Did he not trust her?

She huffed through her nose in bewilderment, turning to see if Kiara had witnessed JJ's stubborn audacity. But she continued to stare, unconvinced, at John B. "Since when can you dive?"

"I'll do it; it's fine." John B's tone was final, but Josie scoffed in retaliation.

"I literally just said I could do it."

"I'm not okay with that either," Kiara sternly added. She shot the girl a glare as if to tell her not to push it.

Josie shook her head aggravatedly, unaware of what other option they had to explore the boat. She stared at her younger friend and silently tried to convince her to change her mind. Josie was more than capable, and now she had a point to make. She'd prove that she did not need, nor want, JJ to make decisions on what she could, or could not, handle.

Josie could see Kiara acknowledge the dilemma in her eyes, but she still shook her head in defiance.

"Let me do some calculations real quick," Pope suggested as he removed a random map from the cup holder. Josie got up to move onto the bow of the boat, arms crossed over her chest as she crouched down. To say her pride was wounded was fairly accurate.

"You serious?" Kiara asked John B, disappointed. She rolled her eyes and stood to consider their circumstances. She stared at Josie, who peered down at the sunken boat. They both intently listened to Pope's findings.

"Okay, so that boat's about thirty feet down, right? So, it'll take twenty-five minutes at most at that depth. Which means you need to make your safety stop at about...ten feet. Alright? For two minutes."

While Pope spoke, Kiara bent down to grab Josie's elbow and pull her from her crouched position. She motioned her head at what Pope was saying and tugged at the redhead's shirt. She then mimicked the motion of tying a knot and pointed down in the water.

Josie's expression softened as she sent Kiara a grateful smile. She'd obviously taken into consideration Josie's desire to prove herself useful and heal her wounded disposition.

The brunette moved back as Josie unbuttoned and shimmied out of her shorts down to her bathing suit, unaware of the show she gave everyone behind her. She lifted her shirt over her head and, with a low high-five to Kie, jumped off of the boat and down toward the anchor.

⋆

"What was that all about?" Pope looked at Kie, who just shrugged and smirked down into the water proudly.

"I don't know, but I liked it. A lot," JJ expressed, staring down at where his best friend had disappeared, clearly dazed at the sight he'd witnessed.

All of them awkwardly shuffled and cleared their throats as they tried not to think about the sensual sight the redhead had accidentally given them. They were well aware of how embarrassed Josie would be if she found out.

⋆

Under the water, Josie made her way down the anchor chain. She used her own feet to make an estimate of ten feet, swimming around and verifying that she was correct. Once she was confident, she tied her shirt to the chain like Kiara had instructed.

Once she was sure it was secure, she made her way up and out of the water.

When she broke the surface, she wiped the hair from her face and took a much-needed breath. She observed the pogues' discussion as she swam to the side of the boat. "Okay, B! I tied my shirt to the anchor chair about ten feet down. When you come up to it, go ahead and make your safety stop."

"Heard, thank you," he shot out to her. She rolled her eyes, but she still smiled and nodded as she hummed in response.

She bobbed around in the water while Pope debriefed John B on any safety information he needed to be aware of. Eventually, she noticed both a smiling Kiara and a dazed JJ staring out at her as she swam around. They both received a goofy grin in return.

Shortly after, she moved to the back of the boat and lifted herself up onto the ladder. She disregarded the arm JJ reached toward her, instead grasping Kie's as she helped pull her back in. Josie tried to ignore the obviously offended look he gave her, and she turned to Kiara. "Thank you very much."

"Breathe as little as possible," Pope advised as Josie walked behind John B. She patted his back condescendingly, still under the impression that she'd be the better fit. But it seemed she had no say in the matter.

"Zen. Think Zen, y'know?" JJ imitated breathing through a mask. Josie breathed out a laugh at the irony of his display, considering that John B was supposed to be breathing less.

"Yep. Got it."

"Hey, if we get caught out here in the marsh, we're basically screwed, so...better get a move on," Pope advised. Josie nodded in agreement as the brunette climbed to the front of the boat. She dreaded the thought of someone catching them out there.

"Copy that."

Much to Josie's profound surprise, Kiara stepped up to stand in front of John B on the bow. Without missing a beat, she leaned in and placed a kiss on John B's cheek.

Josie's eyes widened as her chest filled with all kinds of contrasting emotions. The main one being overwhelming incredulity.

They had a code—a strict code. And while Josie couldn't fully tell if this was crossing the line, it sure felt like it did. She thought she and Kiara had talked in detail about that rule enough that they were on the same page. The rule that Josie held with the utmost respect and severity. The rule that set the precedent for making sure that their friendships stayed unbreakable.

No Pogue-on-Pogue Mackin'.

As Kie pulled away, John B's shocked eyes flitted down to an equally nonplussed Josie. He quickly searched for some kind of humor to decrease the obviously growing tension.

"You want in, too?"

Maybe it was a slight aggravation that someone had crossed the line. Maybe it was the fact that she'd spent so long viewing that rule with such sacredness that she almost found it unfair of her friends to apathetically challenge it. Or maybe it was just Josie being petulant.

Whatever it was, it compelled Josie to take one step up the bow and plant one right on John B's cheek.

She immediately sensed how weird it was—like she was encroaching on territory morally forbidden. It wasn't like she'd even really kissed him, but she felt as if she'd committed a serious crime. Like kissing a brother or kissing a dog.

She completely missed the scoff and sour look JJ shot the group, particularly Josie, and he gauged their interaction. She instead rolled her eyes at the flabbergasted look on the brunette boy's face, stepping down from the bow.

"Diver down?" John B hesitantly directed toward Kiara.

"Diver down," Kie confirmed. She too stepped down as John B pulled the mask over his face. The girls avoided eye contact with each other as she did so, neither one completely certain of what had just happened.

Josie turned to make her way toward the back of the boat, passing a confused Pope and a huffing JJ.

John B jumped from the boat, fully decked out in scuba gear. Once he rose, he gave them a two-finger salute and then submerged himself. They all bid their goodbyes, and they watched his shadow blend into the murky water the further down he went.

Pope moved to sit beside Josie, and he raised his brows at her as he settled in on her right. Josie, who'd taken to picking at her cuticles, tried to look anywhere but at him.

Guilt gnawed at her, and she dreaded that her own internal debates could cause tension with the people most important to her. The annoyance at the obvious grudge JJ held against her, the frustration toward letting her insecurities cloud her judgment, and the vexation at how much Kiara and John B's interaction had bothered her. They all built up in her chest and brought out a string of choices she wasn't happy with.

She'd kissed all of the boys and Kiara on their cheeks multiple times before. Most of the time through obnoxious laughter and smiles, and other times when saying goodbye. So it shouldn't have been such a big deal.

But it was the way they'd looked at each other. The way Kiara had seemed so willing to throw away the very rule that held so much meaning. That had really stung. Because if one of them disregarded the rule, then what was even the point of it?

Josie had never truly considered what would happen if any of them did decide to be together, despite the boys' constant jokes about it. She'd always seen it as a passing thought, something so unreasonable that it was out of the question. But what if that wasn't the case?

Pope's hand nudged her shoulder, and she turned to meet the curiosity in his gaze. "You know, for being the biggest advocate I know for the sacrosanctity of the rule, you sure were fast on the swoop there."

Josie roughly shoved him with her shoulder, ignoring the looks JJ threw back at both of them. It was obvious he and Kie were both eavesdropping on the conversation.

She tried to play off how much it had affected her. "Please, I've kissed all of you on the cheek plenty of times. John B doesn't need to flatter himself."

Pope shrugged through his chuckle. "Well—and I'm telling you this because I love you—if you ever try to kiss me, I'm pushing you in the water. No hesitation."

She didn't know if he could tell she'd needed the laugh, but the jest caused Josie to throw her head back in a cackle. She held her hand to her chest and pretended to gasp offendedly, while also trying to catch her breath. Pope had also seemed to find his statement quite funny, which only aided in her amusement.

She smiled appreciatively at him, but he focused on something behind her. His eyes widened as he made out what was coming toward them, and he sat up straight. "Shit, JJ."

Josie turned in sync with the blond, just in time to hear the little bloops of a siren. Her eyes widened when she caught sight of the police boat headed straight for them.

"Guys, that's the police." JJ rounded the front of the wheel as Pope and Josie stood.

The redhead ducked as she shoved past them toward the other side of the boat. She looked down at the water, whipping her head back at her friends. "I'm going in."

"What? No! We have no clue how long you'll have to be down there for," Kie asserted, briskly walking to Josie and grabbing her elbow to stop her.

Josie looked at her with wide, panicked eyes and vigorously shook her head. "Kiara, I cannot be caught out here." She turned to JJ, the fear of being caught evident in her stare. "I'm serious, JayJ. He gave us a warning last time, but if he tells my mom, I'm screwed. I have to hide."

She pleaded with JJ, eyes silently begging him to back her up enough to give her to climb over the side. The setting sun guarded them enough that their faces were masked from a distance, but only for so long. As soon as the boat got too close, it'd be too late for her to make an escape.

The internal debate shone in his eyes: the overprotective part of him demanding that he not let her off that boat, versus the part of him that respected and trusted her enough to make her own decisions, no matter how stupid he thought they were. The same part of himself that he'd pushed aside when he'd refused to let her dive. The same part that Josie had so graciously extended toward his choices more than once.

She could tell when he'd made his decision, lips pressed into a thin line as he shuffled over and gently removed Kiara's hand from her elbow. He nodded at her. "Fine, but don't push it. We'll figure it out if you have to come back up, so don't go die down there."

Josie was already climbing over when she sent him a curt nod. The three bodies surrounding her blocked the advancing boat's view, so she figured it was her best option. She dropped off into the water, slinking up against the boat to wait for a signal to sink down.

The other three settled on the boat, Kiara's voice ringing out over the water. "Just act frickin' normal."

She listened as the siren sounded once again, much closer than what she'd perceived a few moments prior. The boat rocked against her back, a clear indication that the police vessel had stopped beside them.

"Evening, officers," Pope called out, barely masking the nervous quiver of his voice.

"Evening," her uncle's voice rang out. Josie squeezed her eyes shut, noiselessly pleading that he didn't see her or inquire too much about where she was.

Pope instructed JJ to tie the police boat's rope down, and Josie got ready to sink. She watched the shadow of her uncle spread out along the water and waited to see if he'd board the boat. As her gaze moved upward, she caught sight of JJ settling back on the edge of the boat right above her, obviously trying to cover any potential views of her.

"How you kids doing? Y'know the marsh is closed?"

The pogues denied any knowledge of the situation, surprised lilts in all of their tones: No, wow. I didn't know. "Why-why is it closed?"

"Well, we're conducting a search out here. Boat went down."

The boys once again let out surprised ohs and looked out at the water in faux confusion. Josie glanced up to make fleeting eye contact with JJ as he winked down at her.

"You seen anything?" Her uncle asked, and Josie silently huffed at his condescending tone. She never liked the way any of the police, or authority in general, used that tone specifically toward people from The Cut.

The boys voiced their denial once again. Josie could vaguely make out Kie glancing out worriedly at her. The redhead knew she risked being caught by wading in the water for so long, but she wanted to be careful. She would only go under when it became absolutely necessary.

The problem was that she'd have to make her way down pretty fast to get out of sight.

"Where's your friend you always hang with? He here? And Josephine," he pointed at Kiara. "Thought she told her mama she was with you today?"

"He's working," Kie answered as her shoulders shrugged. "And I dropped Jose off at the docks before we all met up. She's with Max."

Josie silently praised Kiara's sneaky genius, and she reminded herself to shower her in gratitude later. If there was one person she could count on to conjure up a cover story, it was the Carrera girl.

There was a beat of silence, and Josie stilled, wide-eyed, as she worried they'd been caught. She waited for her uncle to call out her name—to reveal that he'd seen her jump over and was taking her home to tell her mother everything.

She counted down the seconds until her doom, when the boat slightly tilted backward, signaling that her uncle had moved to climb aboard. Without listening to what he'd begun to say, Josie inaudibly took in a slow inhale and submerged.

Thump, thumpthump, thump, thump, thumpthump

She knew she had to make haste, but she still let herself lower slowly so that she didn't exert too much energy and need for air. She made her way under the boat for cover. She pressed as far up against the boat's underbelly as she could, straining to make out the muffled voices while still keeping her mind clear and her body calm. She tired to keep herself focused by listening to the heartbeat in her ears.

Thump, thumpthump, thump, thump, thumpthump

She opened her eyes to see John B at the anchor tie. He held onto it as he glanced between her and the boat. She slowly pointed upward, before pushing a finger to her lips. He nodded in understanding and watched the figures move above the surface.

Thump, thumpthump, thump, thump, thumpthump

She concentrated on counting the beats, closing her eyes again to find her most relaxed state of mind.

She wasn't underwater; she was at the Chateau. She was swinging in the hammock, watching the seagulls fly in and out of the water, and occasionally taking a photo. The distant smell of marijuana and salt water lightly blew through the air around her.

Her friends surrounded her, their laughter drifting through the air like musical melodies flowing from a guitar. Her side was flush against JJ's as they swayed in the hammock and passed a blunt. Pope laid at the other end, on her left side, and they discussed the relevance of FDR as president.

John B and Kiara sat in the chairs that surrounded the fire pit, also sharing a blunt and laughing at the animated argument their friends were having.

Josie would look over at JJ's piercing blue eyes every so often, and he would chime in with a passionate "yeah" or "you're full of shit" at her signal. Pope would scoff in annoyance; no one ever backed him up as much as those two teamed up with each other. Then their argument would start again. Rinse and repeat.

Everything was peaceful. Everything was serene.

Josie desperately tried not to think about the buildup of CO2 that she began to feel in her lungs. It traveled up her throat and toward her brain, and the effects of lightheadedness started to sting behind her eyes. The urge to cough and gasp for air was strong, but she held it in as best she could and continued to listen for the indistinct voices above her.

A noise of alarm caused Josie's eyes to shoot open. John B had begun to panic, frantically looking down at his meter and up at the surface. Josie noticed the bag in his hand, a sign that he'd definitely found something in the boat.

But Josie couldn't celebrate the find before it registered that her friend's life was in real danger.

She went to swim toward him, but he violently shook his head and pointed a finger up toward the surface. Fearful, Josie sank back to her previous position. The redirection of her focus allowed Josie's body to feel the effects of a full five minutes underwater.

His alarm beeped again, and she panicked. Screw it.

She swam toward him and grabbed the bag in his hand, staring at the beeping alarm in his other. She wordlessly asked if he was okay, mimicking pulling the mask off to inquire if that was the best solution. He shook his head reassuringly. She looked up and pointed to the surface worriedly, another question of whether or not they should rise.

Before he could answer her, the sound of a boat starting up caught their attention. The propellor at the bottom of the police vessel spun, rocking the Pogue as it peeled away. With the confirmation that they hadn't been found out, both teens quickly made their way upward toward their friends.

Josie let out a loud gasp as she broke the surface, coughing out the CO2 that had built up in her lungs. She whipped her head to the side to see her friend resurface at the same time, mask still covering his face. She felt him take the bag back from her as she gaped at him.

"You absolute dumbass! I can't believe you're not fucking dead! That's another life down the drain, not that you have many more!' She splashed some water at him and tried to calm her heavy breathes. Despite the joke, Josie was immensely relieved at her friend's ability to avoid imminent death.

Sighs of relief rang from everyone on the boat as the duo revealed that they were okay. They laughed in solace, glad that both teens hadn't drowned, before Pope spoke. "Don't scare us like that!"

"Jose, you good?" Kie called, worry for her friend apparent despite the smiling nature of the girl in the water.

Josie smiled, pushing her arms out to swim backward as she laughed out in amazement. "Never better, Kie."

"How'd it go down there?" JJ queried, and John B held up an okay sign with his hand. He and Josie both made their way toward the back ladder, and the blond followed them down the boat. "Did you find anything?"

"Did I find anything?" John B laughed and removed the scuba mask, throwing the bag in his grasp up toward JJ's extended hand.

The boy immediately cheered. "Yeah, there we go! That's my boy!"

JJ flung the bag on the chair beside him, radiating giddiness as he moved back to the duo. John B motioned for Josie to head up first, and as she climbed up the ladder, the blond grabbed her elbow to help her into the boat.

As soon as she was flat on her feet, Pope shoved JJ aside to pull Josie into an embrace. She gladly accepted, laughing as he frantically pulled away to gape at her. "How could someone so smart be so goddamn stupid?"

She could only shrug in response.

"You okay?" Kie called down to John B.

Josie turned to grin down at the boy as he spoke, squinting due to the water in his eyes. "Yeah, I ran outta air."

Josie chuckled and shook her head teasingly. "I was convinced Johnny-Nine-Lives over there was gonna pass out, and I was gonna have to carry him back up, which would've screwed us both."

"Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, RJ," John B joked as he climbed up that ladder. She reached out for his hand, grasping it and helping him up.

"It's the truth, Lord knows I can't swim and carry someone. Have you seen my noodle arms?" She waved her arms around for comedic effect.

She could feel the aftershocks of an adrenaline rush setting in, her heartbeat pumping as it tried to catch up with the steady airflow moving through her lungs. Her veins pumped with excitement as she reminisced on the rush the first gasp of air had given her—a stark contrast to actually being down there.

"You both scared the shit out of me," Kie complained as her relieved gaze moved between the both of them. Josie smiled sympathetically and pulled her friend into a side hug, which she reciprocated. Kie wrapped her arm around Josie's back, leaning the side of her head against Josie's for comfort.

"Yeah, the cops were up here, but, uh...took care of 'em," Pope relayed. Josie smirked at the small hint of adrenaline entwined in his voice. He may never admit it, but he too craved chaos every once in a while.

"My bad," John B apologized as he sat at the top of the ladder, grin wide across his face.

"You're all good."

"Yeah, you kind of missed the show, guys," JJ added.

Josie rolled her eyes and smiled back at the giddy boy as they watched John B remove his gear. It couldn't have been much of a show, and it was definitely one she didn't mind missing anyway.

Their smiles were broken the moment Kiara's voice sounded, full of warning. "Hey, guys? Guys, bogey, two o'clock."

"What?"

They all turned to watch as a very expensive-looking speed boat made its way toward them, albeit not directly at them. Josie swore she'd never seen the boat in her entire life, and because of the setting sun, it was difficult to distinguish who the drivers were. She squinted and placed a hand over her eyes to try and get a clearer view, but she still couldn't gather much.

"Do you recognize that boat?" Pope asked, voicing Josie's own thoughts at the sight of the unfamiliar boat.

"I've never seen it." Josie shrugged, speaking in turn for the Figure Eight side of the island. That boat hadn't been around their side; she was confident she'd remember something like that. She continued squinting to try and make out any familiarity in the figures.

When it came to living on Kildare, owning a boat was like owning a car. It got you from point A to point B, and sometimes travel was faster in the water. Everyone could be recognized by the sight of their boat, so an unfamiliar one was not something to take lightly.

"What are they doing back here? The marsh is closed," Kie accused, and Josie nodded, brows warily furrowed.

It was suspicious. The pogues were out there because they were doing sketchy, illegal shit. So, the probability was that that boat was also out there to do sketchy, illegal shit.

"I don't know, but let's not stick around and find out." Josie hummed in accordance with JJ's statement, glaring at the approaching boat. A thought quickly occurred to her, and she immediately went in search of her bag.

"JJ, get the bowline," John B instructed.

"Yeah," JJ confirmed. Slowly, he began to raise the line as they all used steady movements to move around the boat. The strangers were becoming fast in their approach.

Josie dug the camera out of her bag, pushing to stand right behind John B and peer at the boat over his shoulder. It wasn't like any of them had binoculars, and the camera was a sure-fire way to see if they could recognize the people driving the boat.

"Should we wait on 'em?" Pope directed toward John B, who quickly shut him down with a low, stern voice.

"No, we're not gonna wait on 'em." He patted Pope on the shoulder. "Go get the stern. Go!"

"Are you joking?" Kie directed the question at Pope's prior inquiry, worry clear in her tone as they all eyed the boat. She turned to the blond boy, who continued to raise the bowline. "JJ, hurry up."

They sat there for a moment, tensions high as they were unsure of what to do next. "Don't-guys don't wait for me. Don't wait for me. Go." JJ demanded as they watched him pull the line up. John B quickly started up the boat as Pope got the stern up.

"See anything, Jose?" John B turned toward her as she used the lens to zoom in on the boat ahead. She could make out the features of both men vaguely and made the hasty decision to snap a quick picture of the two of them.

She brought the camera down from her face and shook her head, sharing a concerned look with John B. "I've never seen those guys before. I don't think they're locals."

"I don't like the look of this. Are they coming for us?" John B disquietly asked, his eyes never leaving the other vessel.

Josie moved a bit further toward JJ as she continued to cautiously stare at the strangers. If something were to happen, she wanted immediate access to pull him down from the front of the boat.

The Pogue slowly moved forward as they all continued to watch.

"Maybe they're fishing for drum, too," Pope tried to reason. But Josie shook her head once she saw the clear path the boat had set on.

"Go, go, go, go, go, go!" JJ repeatedly rushed as Josie pulled him down into the cockpit, gripping his hand in her right one. He guided them both to stand on the left side of the wheel, entwining their fingers to gain a better grip on her.

They strained to keep their voices low as they urged John B to make haste, trying to prevent their words from traveling across the water. "Go into the marsh," Pope instructed, and John B swiftly made a right turn into the thick of the marshland. Patience wore thin as the pogues continued to rush him.

"Act, natural, act natural," Pope commanded. Josie would've laughed at his tone if it weren't for the scary men approaching them.

Josie pulled the camera back up to her face with her left hand to look at them again, but JJ quickly pushed her arm back down. "Don't let 'em see you." Instead, she stood on her tiptoes to look over JJ and watch the boat speed up, making the last-minute decision to follow them.

"Hey, guys. They're following us!" Kiara worriedly voiced the boat's change as she continuously eyed it over her shoulder.

"Oh, this can't be good," Pope let out against John B's shit.

Josie gripped JJ's hand tighter, and she tried to discern what the hell they would want with the teens. But then her gaze caught sight of the bag John B had brought up from the sunken boats. Conversations about smugglers and such flashed in her memory, and she couldn't help the thought that maybe they were in over their heads.

If the mysterious men were out there for the boat, and they figured that the pogues had also been out there for it...who knew what lengths they were willing to go to for whatever was in that bag.

"Dude, you gotta go faster! Gun it!" JJ urged.

"I'm going. I'm going!" The Pogue picked up speed, worry evident in the driver's voice as he navigated through the marsh with dread sinking into his bones. It was obvious when the boat matched the speed that it was chasing after them, and Josie's anxiety skyrocketed.

Was the bag really worth it?

John B made as many turns and swerves as possible, desperate to lose the boat that trailed them. They had a slight advantage, as John B knew the waters better than any visitors could care to guess. But it was clear that their advantage was equally challenged by the power of such an expensive boat.

Josie went to pick the camera up and get a good look at them again, when she heard a loud bang.

The rest of the pogues immediately ducked; JJ let out a startled "what the?" as he harshly tugged at Josie's hand to follow. Kie let out a cursed cry, and everyone turned to look back at the boat in horror.

In the startle of the gunshot, Josie dropped her camera. And in JJ's frazzled attempt to pull her down by their connected hands, her arm had flailed out to hover over the side of the boat.

Meaning that Josie's camera now belonged to the marsh.

"No!" Josie cried out in distress, releasing JJ's hand and leaning over the side of the boat to stare down at the passing water. She couldn't believe it; that was what her day had turned into. One of her most prized possessions, next to her signed 1989 CD, slowly sank toward the bottom of the marsh, and she could do nothing but watch.

Her life's art, once again victim to the water.

"John B, Jose, get down!" JJ exclaimed as he persistently tugged Josie's arm to get her to bend down. She stared down alongside the boat, before eventually complying with JJ's repeated actions and bending down in front of the steering station. As she did so, another shot rang out.

"Oh my god, we're gonna die," Pope cried out as he curled further into the floor to stay out of bullet range.

Josie surveyed the front of the boat, trying to organize her jumbled thoughts and figure out a way to slow the boat down long enough for John B to speed away. She shuffled along the front in a crawl, hands splayed out frantically as she tried to think and feel for anything.

"I swear, if you get shot, I'm gonna kill you," JJ hissed as he watched her scramble around. He reached for her ankle to try and pull her back to the side of the boat with him, but she kicked his wandering hand away.

Another shot rang out, and Pope began hyperventilating at the notion of death becoming imminent. Josie hissed out a curse, and she racked her brain for something fast. John B could only weave through the marsh for so long.

"Aha!" Her hand ran along a drag net, and she pulled it from its hiding spot under a tarp. She knew from experience that a fishing net could stop an in-motion jet ski, and she figured it didn't hurt to try it on a boat.

It was the same concept, right? The net gets sucked into the impeller, or the propeller, and stalls the engine. Simple enough.

"Kie! Do you remember eighth grade? Your dad's ski?" Josie shouted, holding the net as she turned to the girl. She raised the net toward her, and with just a look, Kiara understood exactly what Josie wanted.

Because she'd been the passenger on that jet ski.

The girls moved to meet in the middle, when another bang let out around them. They both gasped in terror but were grateful that the men seemed to be terrible shots.

"Get down, guys!" John B advised, but Josie ignored him as she lurched forward and shoved the net into Kiara's hands.

She hastily pushed at her shoulders, urging her to turn and head toward the back of the boat. "Go, go!" As Kie rushed to the back, she turned to John B. "Sharp turn B, asap."

He nodded and abruptly steered the Pogue to a harsh right. As he did so, Kie flung the net out behind them and directly into the path of the other boat. Another two shots rang out, and Josie crouched down while she strained to watch the boat continue forward. She crossed her fingers, praying that it would hit the propellers like planned.

The boat skidded as it moved over the net, bringing the men to a halt as they caught the trap. Everyone stared as the mystery boat completely stopped and the Pogue kept moving, speeding around a corner as another bullet whizzed for them.

But they were out of sight; meaning they'd made it. They were alive.

They took a beat to glance around at one another, moving to stand due to the lack of immediate threat. And all at once, chuckles of relief fell from their lips, and Kiara let out a cheerful "whew!"

"Oh my god! Whoo!" JJ cheered, looking back behind them astounded as he celebrated their state of living. Josie chuckled as she admired the light burning back into his eyes. "Booyeah! Pogue life, man! See you guys!" He waved behind them, even though the men obviously couldn't see them.

"That was insane! You're a fucking genius, Grey." Kie breathed out, marching to pull her best friend into the firmest embrace possible. Josie reciprocated, wrapping her arms under Kie's and squeezing her tightly.

"I can't believe we're alive. What would we do without the girls?" Pope questioned in shock as JJ continued to cheer, standing at the front of the Pogue and raising his fists.

"We're not all alive," Josie mumbled. She pulled away from Kie to mournfully glance at everyone. She looked out into the marsh to dramatically display her grief.

They were alive, but her dearest camera wasn't.

"Looks like we're planning another funeral." John B's voice was laced with fake-solemn as he reached to rub her shoulder.

Pope shook his head and groaned, and he sat down to calm his breathing. "No way. Last time I got roped into giving a speech."

"It was a very beautiful speech," Josie countered, and Kiara nodded. She thought back to the year prior, when they'd all gathered in John B's backyard for a funeral dedicated to Josie's previous device. She and Kiara had made everyone dress up in black-tie attire and everything.

"It was for a camera."

Josie stayed silent, contemplating what she was going to tell her mother since her three-thousand-dollar camera now sat at the bottom of the marsh. She shuddered at the mere image of her mother's furious face.

The sun had set well past the skyline by the time they made it back to the Chateau. Everyone agreed that they'd wait to open the bag when they got there, and it was obvious that the five of them were quite eager to see what they almost died for.

They excitedly clambered off the boat and onto the dock in record speed, with JJ haphazardly tying down the boat before following them to the covered pier. John B sat the bag down in the center, kneeling to open it as everyone gathered around him.

"What d'you guys think it is?" Kie asked, watching as they all giddily approached.

"Gotta be money or somethin', right?" John B asked, and Josie shrugged in concurrence.

"If it's worth getting almost killed for, it's gotta be, like, jewels or cash."

"That or a couple of keys with street value to the low-to mid-mils, man!" The excited tilt of JJ's voice had Josie practically melting, and her grin widened as the creases by his eyes became prominent.

"Can we please just open the bag?" Pope exclaimed, and everyone's bewildered gazes traveled toward him. Josie huffed out a laugh, impressed and confused by her friend's unnatural exuberance of passion.

"Wow, Pope. That's a rare outburst of emotion coming from you." They all let out sounds of respect and surprise, amiably teasing him.

"Okay. You guys are literally killing me with anticipation, so open the bag."

As they teased him, he bent down to look at John B, and Josie slung her arm around his shoulders. She leaned down with him, gently shaking him in their shared excitement as he spoke. "We almost died for this. Bartholomew did die for this."

Josie smiled at her best friend sadly—a silent thank you for considering her loss.

"I thought you named it Francis?" JJ butted in, brows furrowed in confusion.

"She did, but she changed it after she read The Devil's Captain," Pope explained. Josie glanced between the two of them, baffled that they'd remembered such things.

John B stood and pulled a cylindrical, aluminum canister from the bag. Josie chuckled as he struggled to get the top off, and she bit her lips to avoid making any quips about doing it for him. Once he twisted the top off, everyone leaned in to get a good look.

He turned it upside down and dumped whatever it was in his hand, and Josie stared, confounded.

It was a compass.

To be clear, Josie was a full-blown sucker for antiques. Every piece of furniture, almost every article of clothing, and every decoration in her room was second-hand or vintage of some kind. Whenever they went to the mainland, and even some of the businesses around town, Josie frequented antique sections and thrift stores like they were her third home. It was the history lover in her and her admiration for all things that survived time. The closest thing one could get to a clear image of the passage of time.

All that to be said, Josie was the first person to appreciate an old, timeless relic. But they'd quite literally almost died for it.

"Oh, wow. Yup. That's about right. Good job, everybody. We found a compass." Pope removed himself from Josie, turning in disbelief as his hands rose to his head. The other pogues stared down in confusion and dismay.

JJ removed his hat, a clear sign that he was really fucking disappointed. John B, however, stayed completely still, his stare unwavering from the object in his hand. JJ looked at him, confused. "Dude, what? It's not worth anything."

In a soft, tender voice, John B spoke through a tone of pure shock.

"This was my father's."

⋄ ⋟⋆ june 19, 2020

sometimes I think whatever overarching being that observes as I live and die looks at me with bearing teeth and a cruel heart. and other times, I remind myself that the pangs of hurt in my soul are fully of my own doing. no hands can scar your heart like your own. I often find myself sinking into my innermost turmoils, and letting them control how I behave. god rest the souls of my loved ones, who stand with open arms and open hearts as I bare my cruelness towards them. but I know it is how I was made. to take every single word sung in my direction and insert it into my veins like an addict yearning for another hit. I crave love, I crave acceptance, I crave companionship. there is a reason I bear resemblance to my mother. as I sat under her boot begging for her to accept me, she kicked me away only to pick me up and kiss me on the head. but for all the faults my mother gave me, I am also my fathers daughter. and I would swallow myself whole before giving up my aches and pains. I will carry them with me like the scars from childhood on my body. and they will consume me, as they always have.

- josephine grey   ⋄ ⋟⋆

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Has anyone ever suggested Hey Jealousy by the Gin Blossoms for the Johnlock playlist? It's a good one to imagine from John's perspective!

[Verse 1] Well, tell me, do you think it'd be all right If I could just crash here tonight? You can see I'm in no shape for driving And anyway, I've got no place to go And you know, it might not be that bad You were the best I'd ever had If I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago I may not be alone

[Chorus] Tomorrow we can drive around this town And let the cops chase us around The past is gone, but something might be found To take its place Hey jealousy Hey jealousy Hey jealousy Hey jealousy

[Verse 2] You can trust me not to think And not to sleep around And if you don't expect too much from me You might not be let down 'Cause all I really want is to be with you Feeling like I matter too If I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago I might be here with you

[Chorus] Tomorrow we can drive around this town And let the cops chase us around The past is gone, but something might be found To take its place Hey jealousy

[Instrumental Break]

[Chorus] Tomorrow we can drive around this town And let the cops chase us around The past is gone, but something might be found To take its place Hey jealousy Hey jealousy Hey jealousy Hey jealousy

[Verse 1] Well, tell me if you think it'd be all right If I could just crash here tonight You can see I'm in no shape for driving And anyway, I've got no place to go And you know it might not be that bad You were the best I'd ever had If I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago I might not be alone

[Chorus] Tomorrow we can drive around this town And let the cops chase us around The past is gone, but something might be found To take its place Hey jealousy

[Outro] Hey jealousy She took my heart Well, there's only one thing that I couldn't start

[Lyrics from Genius.com]

Hey Nonny!

OOOOOOOOO NICE CLASSIC ROCK, beautiful! The older tunes always hit different for me, especially the ones I listened to on the radio growing up, hahah <3 

That said, yeah, I totally see it!! Thank you so much for adding it to the playlist!! LOVE IT!

🎶 LISTEN TO THE JOHNLOCK PLAYLIST ON [SPOTIFY] & [YOUTUBE] 🎶

[wormsslime]

#i desperately need someone to write a sherlock holmes adaptation one day where he doesn't work with the cops #and in fact where he got kicked off his previous work with scotland yard because he wouldn't stop. you know. actually solving cases and not #shooting random people and stealing shit from clients #and like it was probably a big public scandal where they weaponized his drug use #but also he's not portrayed as an Evil Addict he's just an adhd guy who buys black market adderall because he's too smart to get diagnosed #and also does coke because why wouldn't he it's like adderall but it makes him enjoy socializing WHICH HE NEVER DOES OTHERWISE #anyway where was i #right in this secret good sherlock holmes adaptation in my head he became known after this #as the guy to go to Instead Of The Police #and in 99% of cases he'll resolve it without ever bringing the cops in #whether that means he just breaks into some shitty dude's house and retrieves your stolen items himself #or he calls up his buddies to come beat down a rich guy until he stops doing the illegal thing #(also in this au sherlock holmes absolutely is friends with sooo many union guys. of the ''car bomb my boss'' flavor.)

#anyway maybe he has to involve the police sometimes when he gets tied up in SCARY INTERNATIONAL POLITICAL DRAMA #but of course that is portrayed as them being as incompetent and annoying and With A Specific Grudge Against Sherlock as possible and like #they'd be minor antagonists in those cases #give me ten million dollars i am the only sherlock modern adaptation understander #have i mentioned yet that mycroft is his loser stoner brother who inherited his trust fund and immediately used it to just smoke weed #and play minecraft for the rest of his life. mycroft makes incredibly complex redstone farms and posts them anonymously on youtube #with explanation voiceover that pauses every five minutes to take another audible bong rip #every time sherlock goes to him for help it's like. oh yeah it's obvious who did it. no i don't feel like explaining. #sherlock my brother maybe if you just TRIED my new sativa hybrid i bred specifically to stimulate neural function and creativity-- #sherlock: watson. we're leaving. now. #john: how much for an eighth #sherlock: WATSON.

@nightmericana

your brain and meat are huge and i love this

if you ever get around to watching Leverage with me i think you will enjoy it. it doesnt have sherlock in it Unfortunately but like it does have a lot of the other good shit in here

i am a woman at war with herself, torn forever between my love of detective fiction and my hatred of cops and cop media

[violetsystems]

Bloodstained is pretty bad ass. Especially if you are a symphony of the night / aria of sorrow kind of person. That should be a personality test. Midnight Pulp has a poorly subtitled version of Sailor Suit and Machine Gun I started watching. As in the subtitles are only there for the first five minutes and make no sense. Similar in respect to Happiness of the Katakuris which I'm surprised hasn't been subbed by now. Delinquent school girl that is apparently a distance relative to a yakuza boss who dies gets wrapped in the underworld and dipped in concrete from a construction crane. MXC vibes on that scene. It's worth watching for the cinematography. It plays like Cops Versus Thugs meets the beginning of House. I like that era of Yakuza film because there was a lot of complex stuff going on politically. So without the subtitles the plot gets lost in really experimental shots mixed in with a really difficult lead character. It has a really amazing vibe to it if you are into Japan from that era. Especially the fashion. Ooh Kosh denim jumpsuits aside. But then again I liked Switchblade Sisters so don't trust my judgement on anything. Just hard to parse what exactly is going on and who is killing who. The one thing I've learned about the Japanese mafia back then is that it isn't much different from America. Lots of property and construction fraud. I grew up in a suburb and a subdivision like that. Mortgage and loan racketeering. The most modern Korean film I've seen that explores that is Nameless Gangster which is also on Midnight Pulp. You can thank the Samsung Channel for helping me discover that because it's right next to the anime channels in the lineup. Also saw the Roundup recently. Ma Dong Seok is in both of those playing very different characters. Probably one of my favorite comfort ensemble actors in Korean cinema. It is interesting taking gangster films from Asia and comparing them to the plots going on around me. Infernal Affairs worked well in that respect. Although I'm not the biggest fan of the Departed. I guess the point is that gangsters in both cultures believe they are doing well by breaking the law. Same with police. Cops Versus Thugs expresses this a lot in Japan at the time with how the police were working with the Yakuza to fight communism. But in the end, it's the people who die and suffer on and off screen. I don't know how Castelvania fits into all of this. Maybe there's an underwritten loan on Dracula's castle. A blood tax if you will. Don't get me started about goths and communism. Call that a “downward spiral.” Swedish House Mafia version of your seminal Japanese gangster film scored by Peter Bjorn and John. Call that the Lutheran brotherhood. Cue the drumroll. 🌀

[aalhmk-blog]

I had this Erika Ransom we've been together for 2 years I really love her more than she'll ever know or realize all she's done ever since we've been together is have nothing nice to say hurtful words all the time and if I would say something wrong she would hang up and play the ignore me game for however long till she's done decided I'm coming back around every 3 months for 2 years so she was asking me about the house she lives in can't let the house go don't know why taking your sweet time moving out so in the meantime just recently just before the deadline of the last week she has to be out she calls me in the middle of the night yelling screaming and crying tell me how sorry she is for hurting me the way she has 3 weeks later what did she do she does it again even worse and get this little stupid John Deere letter from her saying I'm leaving you cuz I'm going to live on the street so I can see what it's like being homeless maybe it'll help it grow temporarily on the streets that's what I get for being nice to someone she had everything that she ever could have had never happy with nothing nothing I am a good person you know she did was sit there on my couch looking at me judging finding everything she didn't like about me to use against me to do this won't speak to me want nothing she calls the cops all the time I trusted her I have a home I have a swimming pool have a nice backyard I know how to build things with my hands like sheds chicken pants I've done nothing to her for this I just don't understand why anybody want to break somebody's heart and hurt them so badly like this all the f****** time she does this she acts like she's the only one that's got feelings and it's all about her everything always all about her Mary f****** Christmas b**** never own up to her own s*** like she's better than everybody else I'm narcissist introvert is what she is what a joke what a f***** up f****** joke I am so sick of b******* Lying Game playing people that think they can come around and use me for their own convenience Diamondback is s*** down my neck well I'm from California I live in Northern California near Sacramento any single lesbians nearby want to go out on date now that I'm single her loss not mine I am a good person I'm trusting I'm loving up caring I'm giving I'm honest I love nature I'm somewhat outgoing hard to laugh and have fun I'm respectful I communicate an easygoing easy to get along with all I want is to love and be loved and be together with someone you can love me back who can respect me back you can communicate treat me right the way I should be treated for a lifetime it's not asking for much I don't think is it