#The focus I've managed to have lately has been mostly used for thinking about that hehe..

[basiliomagnus]

This quote made me think, how do you think tastes and styles of cooking differ between the tribes? Each party member has their own style of food, but Eupha and maybe Heismay are the main ones who we could extrapolate things about their culture from.

I think that paripus food definitely uses the most spices. Rhoag food uses the least

oh im so glad at least one person asks me this i've been thinking like. too much about tribe culinary profiles lately

so to start a while ago i tried to group all the principalities into their climates and ecosystems right. aside from the fact roussainte are fuckin everywhere from what we know:

oceana has a healthy fishing business and is mostly woodland, through they have a small stretch of arid land from central euchronia

central euchronia is high in desert and (presumably) arid soils, though for the purpose of sustaining grand trad let's say that south euchronia contains fertile wetland

montario is extremely mountainous and cold BUT it also has that patch of thick forest though a lot of the fauna there are like. venomous and spit fire

virga island

so when i think about the food part of their cultures i tried to keep in mind where a majority of the tribes seem to be located and how that would have impacted their culinary development, assuming that the population has been relatively consistent since the annex war. there's also their individual values to consider (VERY LONG UNDER CUT)

clemar are like, white brits, so i think assuming they have similar food to irl england is a good starting place. thanks to central euchronia having the desert climate it does however i think mostly in oceana do they have fish as part of their meals and in grand trad its mostly a delicacy. a lot of local dishes that are made up of what can be found lying around, nothing too complex, but due to the nature of where grand trad Is i think they lack a lot of real "desserts" that aren't considered a luxury (sugar is expensive)

roussaintes NEED high protein meals to sustain the amount of physical work they do, so i think meat and leafy green vegetables are a staple in most dishes. lentils, tofu (soybeans are actually really protein dense), nuts, the like. roussainte in montario probably have a lot of spice in their meals for cold weather but to also manage their appetite during military work.

rhoag are a tricky case but hear me out: i feel like a lot of their food takes after other tribes due to how long they live. it's probably customary for a rhoag to wander around a lot in all the time they have to live, so a lot of what they cook ends up influenced by all the other tribes in different ways. as for methods i imagine that they focus on recipes that don't require much physical labor (spending most of your long life in your geriatric stage probably isn't great), so a lot of soups, pan fried stuff, grilling, etc. is probably shared around.

ishkia are almost 100% spice fiends, if you're like me and assume they have bird-like traits in a lot of places they probably have much higher spice tolerance than most other tribes, in addition to their climate requiring warmer meals. a lot of farmwork is probably done down in the lush forest area because mountain farming is historically a bitch and a lot of Brain Food can't be grown in the cold. heavy "brain food" presence in casual meals (fatty fish, coffee, collard greens). a lot of roots, mushrooms, and foragables that grow in cold climates (snowpeas, watercress, acorn, etc) at high altitudes are common, though this sounds horrible bc you cant really Get them anywhere else in euchronia.

nidia because of the Everything read to me as having a high dependence on magla-rich food and stuff that grows low to the ground. a lot of root vegetables (carrots, potatoes, turnips) and berries (straw, blue, the likes) that can be infused during the growing process. lot of emphasis on eye health on that note (leafy greens, citrus, probably raise a lot of chickens for eggs in their villages). theyre very fae folk inspired to me so i imagine a lot of their delicacies are an important part of their culture (muffins, candied flowers, tarts, yknow)

paripus probably take a lot after recession foods given their status and wide-spreadedness, a lot of cheap options like rice, beans, grains, fruits and meat dried. however i also see them as having a large amount of "leftovers" or "community" foods yknow? stuff like hunters stew or bread pudding or salads, generally stuff you can make with what's left over after a big meal and you can share with other people. i think they probably have a lot of "loose" recipes with easy replacements or things you can swap out if you don't have them.

eugief society is analogous to japanese culture if you look at the architectural styles of heismay's village and his clothing so they probably have a lot that's taken from there haha. fish, savory foods, big on spices and they probably invented some form of oil frying. i imagine that the area between oceana and euchronia is heavy in rice production due to the hot and humid climate, on that note

mustari are very analogous to southeast asian/pacific islander culture! lot of rice, game, seafood, emphasis on pairing sweet with salty or savory. i imagine a lot of steamed or roasted foods. mustari that came to the capital or montario probably ended up having to mix traditional styles with the ones present there, esp due to the lack of ingredients that were only capable of being found on the archipelago (side note: here's a nice article about this stuff that i found interesting)

as for elda theyre like. they remember shit from the old world. i know this probably just means they understand how to cook meat the best and get how to properly process certain foods with what cooking material but what if will came out and showed people how to make french fries. imagine

[celorangeine]

hiai guys...🤗 this is the only thing I've only been able to think about lately. bear with me ☹️ i've also merged the characters and guns together so I can ramble more 😎

My Headcanons On What Handguns Bully Characters Would Have Pt. 2

part 1

6. Ted

I think Ted is the type to focus more on speed and durability, and the Beretta 92 is crazy good. It's a pretty big gun but it's solid in the hands, it's probably not going to slip at all. I think Ted would like Beretta guns in general. I also think that he'd be the type to stick to one gun and Beretta 92 is GOOD 👍👍👍 for that

7. Edgar

I think he'd be the type to use any gun tbh, just as long as it's good and has a nice grip, he's cool. I don't think he'd use revolvers that much (😢) so I'm thinking CZ 75. Slightly heavy, but I think Edgar's good with it. The accuracy is SOO good and it survives for so long, and that's just what Edgar needs...😎 Edgar's a CZ kind of guy I just know it

8. Zoe

Zoe would be a big fan of Taurus automatic pistols, more specifically the Taurus G2. It's pretty smooth; the magazine quickly drops once the release button is clicked, gripping on it is easy, and the recoil is rarely aggressive. I feel like Zoe would mostly focus on the comfortability of a handgun and this one is sou good. It's pretty cheap too, it's SO good for its price. There's also the Taurus G3 which is a fair improvement than the G2, but I feel like Zoe is not gonna stop continuously using the G2 until it breaks LUL

9. Otto

I think Otto would mainly use Walther guns, specifically the Walther PK380. It's cheap (& he probably manages to get it for even less) and he loves anything that can be good for concealed carry. I think he'd have a dream gun though: the Nighthawk .357 Magnum. That gun is by far the angriest gun I have ever seen. I think Otto would LOVE Korth guns and wished he had more revolvers... but that gun is $6K 😢

10. Algie

OK I laughed like crazy while thinking about this but. I think in an act of self defense he'd goes to some guys to buy a gun. But the guys scammed him and made him pay more for a Hi Point C9. He thought everyone would be afraid of him now, but then the gun nerds start making fun of him for having a Hi Point. For context Hi Point guns are HEAVILY ridiculed by the gun people because of how shitty they are; they're cheap, but incredibly heavy and are difficult to use

11. Earnest

HONESTLY I think he'd really like Manurhin revolvers... it's so classy and I feel like that's what he's trying to make himself look like. They're CRAZY expensive though (some leading up to $10K) so he'd for the cheapest one; Manurhin MR37. It is a really, really good gun though, one of the best revolvers out there (besides S&W's...) and he's gonna show it off.... I know it. or maybe he's just gonna make his own gun idk man

12. Russell

Russell is a big guy and he would love anything that's heavy and flashy. so I think he'd like the .500 s&w revolver. It is insanely powerful and probably has a really big recoil. I haven't read much about this gun and I'm sure it's pretty expensive ($1K+) but Russell can just steal it you guys. It was made 4 him. Russell also probably struggles with most guns because his hands are big and it's gotta physically hurt to use them. I think he'd go for the big/heavy ones

13. Johnny

I think Johnny would be a huge fan of any old guns from the 1900s, and therefore I think he'd like Lugers a LOT. Their guns are expensive as hell but I like to think he'd buy them from auctions. I doubt he'd actually use any of the old ones cause they're severely outdated (but still good TBH) and he'd probably get made fun of if he actually does use them, but he still buys them for his collection. For a gun that he actually uses though, I think he'd like the Smith & Wesson Bodyguard .380 (the gun in the picture). I think Johnny would go for guns that have good triggers and this is one of them. Also there's a laser inside of it it's crazy

14. Peanut

Peanut I think would love the Ruger Hunter Mark IV. Honestly I think the greasers would all really love rugers. This one specifically looks so good and I thought they'd cost like at least $2K, but when I searched it up they only cost $600-800. Peanut would love that fact. I can imagine Peanut being a gun nerd tbh... so a gun like this that needs a lot of focus is no problem for him. He'd kiss this gun goodnight

15. Lola

ANOTHER Ruger gun and I think Lola would love the Ruger Single Six. In terms of weight it's really balanced, it's INSANELY durable, and the loading & unloading is so smooth. I think it's also mostly made of steel and it fits Lola man. It's a good gun for hunting too and therefore the accuracy is really good, and I think Lola would like guns that have good accuracy. This gun is hung on the wall in her house trust me

[chains-of-destiny]

Monthly Progress Update #1

Hey everyone!

I thought I'd make a monthly update on the project to keep you informed about my progress and any important news or goals for the coming month. I plan to post updates like these at the end of each month.

May was an especially busy month with school, work, and the project. However, I've successfully completed another semester, and with work expected to be quieter in June (hopefully), I'll have more time to focus on writing.

This month, I've managed to add 30k words to the new update - the main paths are mostly drafted, I just need to finish some side paths and a few smaller scenes before polishing and rewriting it. I don't like to set exact release dates (as I often struggle to meet them 😅), but I aim to post the update in June.

About the future

As mentioned before, I'll rewrite parts of Chapters 1 and 2 after finishing the next update. This rewrite will primarily affect the prologue and the first part of Chapter 1, but there will also be some adjustments in Part 2 and Chapter 2. I'll be expanding on things I wanted to include and finishing the questions for Barnabas in Chapter 2. I also plan to incorporate the many suggestions and ideas posted on the Choice of Games forum and Tumblr by you guys. If you have any more ideas or suggestions that you think would be a great addition to the game, or if you encounter a part where none of the options feel right for your character, please feel free to make an ask about it, post it on the forum (here), or just send me a private message if you feel more comfortable with that.

I aim to complete the rewrite by the end of the summer, allowing me to continue with Chapter 3 (which will be an exciting one) in late August.

Lastly, as many of you have noticed, all the portraits in the game are currently generated by AI. However, I plan on replacing them with character art made by real people. I've been in contact with an artist who has been very professional and has agreed to create some character art for the project, which I can use in the demo and the final game. The first commission is for Juna, and I have an ongoing commission for Nemio. After that, I'll hold a poll where you can choose which character you'd like to be the next one.

Art made by: Sunnie

That's all for now. Thank you for your continued support, and I hope you all have a great weekend and a productive June!

[but-first--tea]

B A S I C S

Name: Ferthur Venator

Nicknames: none, unless aliases count. If they do, a lot of them. Notably, her most commonly used aliases for the past couple years have been Omori Kaya and Kasasagi.

Age: adult (I don't like to define characters by specific ages, especially with how wonky the passage of time in RP can be. But logically she's probably in her late twenties or early thirties by now. I created this character 4 years ago.)

Nameday: in game it's the 2nd sun of the 5th umbral moon. I've never RPed it.

Race: well she looks like a xaela

Gender: Female (cis)

Orientation: hetero/demisexual (eternal bonded to Eligos Venator, monogamous)

Profession: "I do what I want" (and try not to get caught). She owns an auction house now, though. That probably counts as an official job! Except it was more like the world's most over-the-top impulse buy while trying to shop for Starlight presents. She's suffering from a case of "asset rich, cash poor" at the moment as a result. That's probably going to suck when she has to pay taxes on the Omori Estate. Oops. Next BBEG: property taxes.

P H Y S I C A L     A S P E C  T S

Hair: White, and rather long. She doesn't wear it in a consistent way, and is instead adept at styling it many different ways to suit the outfit or occasion.

Eyes: Slitted gold

Skin: very fair, which can be a point of frustration for a lizert who would very much like to bask in the sun

Tattoos/scars: For most of her life, the very idea of any sort of permanent identifying feature was anathema to her, a potential threat to her anonymity and survival. However Eligos has slowly begun to erode these fears, and even managed to talk her into getting tattooed. A mixture of dragon scales, geometric patterns, and stylized florals now grace her right shoulder and arm, and curve along part of her hip and leg. So far she's managed to avoid any permanent scars, mostly by pulling a vanishing act when things get out of hand.

F A M I L Y

Parents: She was raised by a Doman shinobi named Harue, who told her that her father was a samurai who had perished fighting a voidsent. Unbeknownst to Ferthur, neither of these people are her birth parents. Harue is now recently deceased, and thus unable to tell her the truth of her origin.

Siblings: None that she knows of.

Grandparents: Harue's mother taught Ferthur her foundation in the arcane arts when the girl began to show an aptitude for them that Harue herself never had. Her grandmother passed away when Ferthur was a teen, leaving her to continue her arcane studies on her own. The lack of guidance went about as well as one might expect.

In-laws and Other: Eligos's parents are still alive, but they do not know Eligos is still alive, and so Ferthur has never met them.

Pets: None

S K I L L S

Abilities: Ferthur was raised by her shinobi mother, and thus was instructed in the shinobi arts from early childhood on. As she grew older, her affinity for the arcane began to show, and her focus quickly shifted to the arcane arts. Her obsession with magic brought her to some very dark places, however, and lately she has fallen back to her roots, relying mostly on the teachings of her mother to survive.

Hobbies: Dance, collecting clothing, theft and general mischief.

T R A I T S

Most Positive Trait: Highly adaptable and quick thinking on her feet, very protective of the self agency of others

Most Negative Trait: Obsessive and prone to spite beyond reason when something upsets her

L I K E S

Colors: Yes. Though to wear she prefers black and white, sometimes blue. (Why yes I did give her a magpie color scheme.) Even though she's not typically superstitious, she'll often wear red 'for luck' when she's about to do something particularly dangerous.

Smells: Jasmine, osmanthus, plum blossoms. Waterfalls and the sea. The spices and scents of the kitchen while Eligos is cooking. Sun-warmed skin and coconut.

Textures: Being buried in fuzzy blankets. Submerged in water. The touch of skin. Tracing anything with patterns or edges. The smooth softness of petals and leaves.

Drinks: Spiced tea, which she grew very fond of during her time in Ul'dah

O T H E R    D E T A I L S

Smokes: Nope.

Drinks: Tea, water. Wine occasionally with dinner. The most ridiculous-sounding drink on the menu if on vacation or traveling.

Drugs: On purpose? Not usually. She's too paranoid and always needs to feel in control. Eligos has talked her into experimenting with alchemy on a couple rare occasions in a very controlled environment.

Mount Issuance: Unless a very tall viera picking her up and carrying her around because she's smol counts, not really. She doesn't own a chocobo or horse, though she does know how to ride.

Been Arrested: She came close once, but she chose murder over capture. Things got rather dicey after that for a while.

Tagged by: @wpip-raham and @starforger Thank you! Sorry it took me forever!

Tagging: anyone who wants to do the thing! This was going around maybe a month ago but I wasn't feeling well

[stry-someone-to-remember-you]

Update... September was a Weird month for Me

2 Updates bellow come directly from my Art Twitter Account:

#STRY #webcomic I haven't posted art lately, as promised. Life kinda got me. Had a few weird days last month of random depression (I mean I know definitely why it happened has to do with something from last September... but I won't get into it)...Then other times this fixation with the novel or jobsearch. Trying to get back in routine of exercising and art. I hope next few weeks to post more. #STRY #SomeoneToRememberYou The #novel is coming together. It still will be several months and still getting everything in life, and the web comic together. But I'm honestly excited! I think I have the final Novel Summary down, -some cuts. Let me know if you want to see it.

~~~~ Sssooooo.... Lets Expand on what I mention above...

WHAT I'VE BEEN UP TO:

I felt more pressure as I also realized Indeed after I worked my ass off fixing my resume and my cover letter, had gone and saved the rough draft version so for the last several months I was using the poorly fixed version of both and had to fix everything again... I really don't like the side but it's one of the best for job searching. I admit my hours for art started becoming a game of job searching, going through the stressful process. I call it a game cause it was almost like an addiction. Especially after realizing I was using this whole time the wrong form of my resume and cover letter. You don't know how embarrassed that was, especially since I'm applying mostly for secretary positions. Talk about FACEPALM... I've told myself my old rule not to look at Job Apps at night, leave them be so I can focus on art... (I also watched a few new to me shows, I've been meaning to watch... got addicted lost time watching them, then came to find out they have a horrible ending *cough* Devil is a Part Timer *cough* yeah took a day to realize that has creeper predator ending) I really fell off my exercise routine which I tell myself I have to do (about for an hour) before I do art, mostly to stay healthy so I can keep doing what I love. I hope to just post some stuff and finally involve myself in the month challenge. Even if late. Stay tuned if I manage that... On my other profiles, job searching since fixing that "accident" up I have had several interviews scheduled since. Tomorrow I have a few scheduled and am so ready. Although, I admit I'm hoping for once with benefits, my last job promised it but never gave any. So I really hope to find one with such. And that will eventually help me in my potential career. If things keep not working, due to having a few friends on the force I've honestly considered going into the academy if things keep not panning out job wise. But they seem to be looking up. And I have looked into doing book reading jobs as well. So I have several avenues I'm looking at just in case. #WISHMELUCk Hopefully, you hear more from me art wise.

I want to thank the many people who've subscribed since my last few posts. Also so sorry for any art friends that think I may have dropped off all of a sudden. I'm still here. Just knd went through some odd motions..

~~~~ Update on Last Post (about the date): Lastly, to my update on going on a date. Yeah it was fine, conversations were odd afterwords and I can't say I felt much after the fact so I don't think that's going anywhere. Took a few weeks away from social dating apps/sites as I can get addicted to focusing on them. I'm trying to control the sudden addictive phases of solely focusing on this or that. I know it's cause I've been more nervous lately not getting previously during the summer more then a few job interviews and wondering what was wrong. Now that I've solved that issue and have several lined up, I'm finally kinda taking the reigns again and switching my focus art I was working on and art for the story.

~~~~~~~~~~

STORY UPDATES:

As for S.T.R.Y... Someone TO Remember You.... I hope to work on the Initial (last valentines day) Hint Post of the main characters which has been sitting in half unfished limbo for months now. And work quickly on the Sneak peak of the characters and full Face Reveal before or Around Halloween, cause I recently was introduced to a fandoms that I really want to use for a character halloween pic. It may be posted after Halloween. But I have an idea of what I'm wanting to do. I can't promise all my plans will work My Dad's birthday is this month, and though he's busy I know we are thinking of celebrating it a month later. So some of my focus will be put to that while the long time he's off working assisting my disabled mother with her many cleaning projects. I promised to help her around the front yard, especially with Halloween coming up for the trick-or-treaters. (Since my mom has mobility issues I'm often the one in charge of answering the door or such. So course I go all out dressing up. And I know it's important to all of use that the house looks good in the areas that can be seen. I wasn't able to do much last year since I was suffering Anxiety. I want to make up for things I haven't done. So I know the many art projects I want to do this month may not occur. But I wanted you to know what plans I'm hoping to do. I know I often pile on a lot, so I'm just saying what I hope accomplish but may not be able to fully do. That's my update so far... Stay tuned. Stay Sweet. PS. Ironic but I finally am just going to work on my UPDATE Comic that Legit I put on hold Two Years almost to this day to Job Search back near the end of the pandemic and now I'm picking it up again. WHy? THe Update is just me using my Authors character, by promoting the story and saying a little about myself. It was my way of practicing making a comic while making art. But, I told myself I wouldn't use the author character to make updates till I posted the comic. I've had so many times the last four months I wanted to make updates. Had a good plan but knew it would be redundant later posting the Update Comic I still plan on. I'm finally at a point where I want to work back on in (with the extended pages to add Recent updates rather then 2 years ago updates)... Then from then on, I hope to have shorter updates where I just use my Author Character to give updates without these long paragraphs and just short tidbits.... I've mentioned it before. But finally want to announce I'm working on finishing that... I still have a art project I'm making as a present, which is Half Way to completion. I added way more elements to it then I planneda nd just had numerous computer issues or life issues that got in the way of that getting completed. I also have a few fan Henry Stickmin art pieces I ALMOST forgot about from April and May I want to get back to soon.... So to say I have alot of art on the way Is not Putting it lightly. I have alot Of future Art coming up.

[pb-dot]

Film Friday: The Matrix

There really wasn't any doubt in my mind over what movie I was going to cover next in my Film Friday series. I did briefly consider a number of movies, but there was really only one I could go for if I was honest with myself. When asked the dreaded question of what my favorite movie is, I often ask, as a clarifying question if they mean favorite as in the one I enjoy the most, the one I think is the most skillfully made, or the most important to me as a person. If the answer is the latter, I invariably say it is today's movie: The Matrix.

So, what is it that makes this movie so important to me? Part of it is no doubt that it came out when I was young, and fate saw to it that I managed to see this R-rated piece of heady hyperviolence a few years before I was perhaps supposed to. It was given an age rating of 15 in my country, and I first saw it as a pre-teen.

The movie blew my mind back then, there's no two ways about it. The late 90's punky rave/cyber aesthetics and the soft-focus worn-out humanity of the postapocalyptic real world, the absolutely mind-bending action scenes of hand-to-hand and gunplay combat, and special effects that defined the entire following generation of action movies. The Matrix had it all, and it was also one of the first movies I had seen that made me think.

I've always been a ruminator, prone to pondering and thoughts that may charitably be described as philosophical, and The Matrix gave me a reference point and language to talk about it to my peers. Yeah, sure, most of my classmates didn't give a single hoot about the difference between what is perceived as real and what is real, but through the tale of Thomas Anderson awakening to the falseness of his reality as his hacker alias Neo, I had an in to talk about some of that stuff. The Matrix wasn't quite the phenomenon in my neck of the woods as I'm told it was elsewhere, so my inability to care about team sports was still a major albatross around my neck of course.

Now, if The Matrix was merely important to me as a child, that would fail to account for the sheer importance this movie has to me, even to this day. A further slice of the pie can be accounted for if I were to take my nascent crushes on Keanu Reeves, it would take more than a decade to realize the nature of this, and Carrie-Anne Moss, the nature of which became apparent to me considerably earlier. There is, however, more.

The part of me that's more of a nerd about technical filmmaking stuff than emotional impact when it comes to movies wants to take this moment to talk about the pacing and structure of The Matrix. Put plainly, this is just about the perfect Hero's Journey flick. People come back to Star Wars Episode IV, but for my money it doesn't have beans on The Matrix. Neo's journey maps just about perfectly onto the threshold-crossing, helpers and mentors, challenges and temptations, death and rebirth, transformation and attonement, the entire package. While following essentially Hollywood's favorite story recipe perfectly might not seem like a great achievement, The Matrix is really the strongest argument for using the formula to lend the story profoundly mythological feel.

It is no accident, I suspect, that reading into the christian symbolism of The Matrix became such a popular topic in the aughts that it, at least according to several anecdotes, was banned in many film litteracy classes mostly because the teachers and professors were sick of reading about it. I will, however, say that the most salient reading to me is the queer one.

In short, the readings of the film has tipped somewhat from the "Kung Fu Jesus"-read that was popular in the 00's to being viewed more as a trans allegory, in part thanks to both of it's directors coming out as openly trans since its release. There certainly is much to recommend this reading, the focus on found family and self-chosen names, the antagonist's purposeful use of Neo's given name, what we would today be calling deadnaming, and so on. The ambigiously gendered character Switch was reportedly also intended to have a different gender in the matrix and out of it, as their "Residual Self Image" did not match their physical body, sadly this turned out to be too spicy for late 90's Warner Broothers and so that idea was cut.

I do agree that a lot of the parts that make The Matrix stand out in my mind can be read as inspired by the lived experiences of its writer/directors The Wachowskis. I would, however, argue that a slightly wider reading as a story of queer awakening might describe the movie more accurately than a strictly trans story, but do keep in mind I say that as a cis bi guy, so it only stands to reason that the themes of queerness would resonate more with me.

With that awareness of my own biases achknowledged though, there is something deeply queer about Neo's awakening into the real world. As Thomas Anderson, he is driven to self-destructive acts by a resounding feeling of wrongness with the world he knows. Thomas is searching, both in the fringes of what he percieves of the physical world, and the open frontier of the internet, for answers that can soothe his worries.

What answer eventually finds him changes his entire reality. As Neo, he lives a life that is more dangerous and more separated from what he used to call the real world than ever before, but it is, in a fundamental sense, real. Meaningful relationship can happen there. There's room for tenderness, for jokes, for genuine cameraderie with others who are in his situation or something very close to it. This all reminds me an awful lot of the 1990 Clive Barker film Nightbreed in this regard. Neo doesn't take to it right away, his social senses, like his eyes and muscles, are weak because he has never actually used them before, but everyone who's there with him has been through it and thus understands. Well, everyone except one asshole, but stories do need antagonists after all.

I feel like I've given this movie only the most cursory of discussions since I haven't even gotten around to discussing the movie's wuxia-inspired fight scenes, its take on fate and properchy, or the complicated legacy of a movie about outcasts fighting the system by employing truly staggering levels of violence on other people who aren't real people on the level of our heroes and as such are acceptable targets. Especially the last point feels like it needs some elaboration in an age that has made "our opponents aren't as human as we are" a popular dogwhistle when calling for violence as a political tool. Maybe I'll get to writing some on that one of these days, but for now I gotta stop putting every thought I've had about The Matrix in the last 15+ years into this post or I'll never get to the end of it.

So, with that in mind, if you haven't seen The Matrix yet, or haven't seen it in a while, give it a go. It's good, and probably gayer than you expect and/or remember.

[chevvy-yates]

Alright, I thought about it last night a bit.

I may just stop forcing myself to do the usual 'male v monday' 'shippy saturday' 'thirsty thursday' 'wip wednesday' stuff (I mean I can't even manage to keep up with that either) and instead post whenever I want, like I do on Friday already when everyone is posting their gorgeous females but I (if I post) do post my boys since I do not have any female oc.

I don't know if I'll completely abandon the tags for it or not. it's gonna be more: if I manage to post on that day, I'll add it, if not, I'll reblog and then tag it with the tag or sth like that.

I will still try and take my at least 30min of time a day (mostly after work around 6pm German time) to browse tblr. Queue often makes noe sense to me, sometimes I use ib when I feel I've reblogged to much in a row already but I do not tage anything that will come from my queue so you won#t even notice that it was queued.

I've also set a few blogs on receive notifications so I do not miss any new posts. I love that feature! But sometimes I have to stop using it if a blog keeps posting like every 1h through the day which will give me 24 notes a day on my phone - forcing me to look and I can't do that. I need to find some balance somehow. Still a thing to figure out to have it healthy.

I do not want to abandon looking at content because you all create so many cool things, but in this fandom, as I already said it so many times: it is just so hard to keep up with it. So please do not be mad about me or think I do not like your stuff (anymore) because I've not liked/reblogged a thing lately of your content. I often feel very 'unmenschlich' (inhuman?) when I can't find time to give some love to others work bc I receive so much from all of you, therefore I want to give it back as well.

Idk how you manage having 4+ ocs btw. I with my 4 boys feel like I abandon at least one for too long (rn it is Vijay - and it makes me so incredibly sad, no one will probably understand). But I have to keep telling myself, he will receive a whole lot of attention and love again. However, this month is for Thyjs, because he's having his birthday soon (13th) and so I will focus on him in the first place.

I decided to slide in Jaysen for something else yesterday (because spontaneous things still happen) and I'll hopp in to take a bunch of pic of him as well once my writing here is done, bc he's modeling for some new real cool pants. And then I go back to my soldier boy doing the same (if I can manage bc taking pic … takes time xD).

What elese?

I'll just need to find a balance when I do at least answer roleplay or do story writing because this also I feel very bad about It gets neglected the most, mainly because I've never been a writer. But I find such joy in it and I feel like a bad person that my rp partner always has to wait such long time until I answer. Some days I'd just love to thorw literally everything aside and just do rp 24h nonstop (we all know this doesn't work) because I love love love this story that developed in the past year and when I think about it I'm just so hyped to share it one day but it's a lot of work to do. It's gotten something like a lifetime project by now?

And I need to stop hording my drafts. Its getting ridiculous …

[skyward-floored]

Hello Peggy!

Congrats, you've been visited by your LU Self Care Anon!

I hope you had a great day, and if not, don't worry, you did your best, and tomorrow's full of new possibilities!

Have you drank enough water? It can really help, abd since I've bought this really neat canteen with included straw I've been drinking a lot more (I think for me it acts as a stim too) Also, remember to get enough sleep, I might be an hypocrite now that i haven't slept at all this night, but it's only one night and I knew it would come, I'll sleep a lot the next. Did you know sleeping on your side may reduce snore or sleep apnea?

What have you been working on lately? Would you like to show me a wip, or describe it? I'm sure it'll turn out amazing, even if you now think it's nowhere near good!

You can do this! Believe in yourself, you're awesome!

Thank you! My day yesterday when you sent this was fine, and today’s been pretty good! Babysitting my nephew ‘cause my sisters getting her wisdom teeth out.

I have a canteen like that! I don’t use it much unless I’m going out of the house somewhere, but it’s pretty nice :) I’ve been trying to drink more water lately, I think I’ve been succeeding! Sleep on the other hand... well. 😅

I usually tend to sleep on my side actually! I didn’t know that though, that’s interesting.

I’ve been working on all sorts of stuff lately! I’m finally out of the crummy mental state I’ve been in since like, May, (mostly anyways, it’s way better than it’s been) and I’ve been bouncing around and working on a lot of different things. Trying especially to focus on stuff I haven’t updated in a while though, which right now mostly means brethren in a cradle.

Here’s a bit of what I managed to write, since you said you’d like to see a wip :)

Warriors and Wolfie came running back through the bushes, blood staining the fur by Wolfie’s mouth.

“More bokoblins,” Warriors said quickly, wiping some blood from his sword. “Only three, but I’d bet anything there are more around. We need to go.”

“But you said we weren’t moving,” Wild replied a little cheekily, and Warriors gave him a flat look.

“That was before I knew there were monsters about. We need a more defensible area— with you and the rancher injured, along with keeping Ember safe, I don’t like our odds in this spot.”

Warriors looked around, frowning in the direction where Twilight has gone.

“Why isn’t he back yet?” he asked worriedly, and Wild and Four looked at each other, then down at Wolfie.

Wolfie twitched an ear.

[scoops404]

this is late! but i'm always curious with rpf writers: how do you consider the 'characters' you write about against the real person? as in, how do you personally manage the separation between the two? especially in regards to shipping as the fandom as a whole seems to veer more towards truthing and an assumption that we, as fans, are able to truly perceive these people.

i see you're very respectful of the creators boundaries in regards to personal information that hasn't been freely given. has this ever been a struggle for you? it's almost impossible not to learn things about creators that has been obtained by shady means as there's an obviously toxic community dedicated to stalking and doxing creators and then using that information to harass fans by shoving it in their face. hopefully this hasn't happened to you but if it has and you've been unwillingly shown personal information about the people you're writing about, how do you personally deal with that while writing to ensure you're respectful of their right to privacy?

sorry if this is a bit more esoteric than you were asking for! i won't be offended if you choose not to answer :) love your writing! you're definitely one of my go-to authors if people ask for recs!

It took me a while longer to get to this ask because I wanted to think on it, hope you don't mind :)

Also, this got super long so it's below the cut

I never for one second have thought I actually know the ccs, in any of the rpf fandoms I've been in. I was trying to think of how I've always felt that distinction, and honestly, I think it's because I've read so many AUs that it's easier to separate fic!cc from irl!cc - dunno if that helps, but for me it's like the written versions in stories are so different because they always have the tone of the author in the style of the piece, the "characters" are filtered through their eyes, no matter how grounded in their quirks and vernacular the author is, they can't 100% take themselves out of it. That's how I always see the distinction, i guess. No idea if this is making sense to anyone else.

Moreover, I've also always believed the ccs deserve their privacy, so for someone to write a story about them and think they haven't missed any nuances of who these people are as people, is like so dumb? We can't 100% know them, and we SHOULDN'T 100% know them. There should be a wall dividing us from them.

As far as writing them--some stories they are completely different but you have to reach at something true about them and expand on it. I'm talking mostly about AUs like thief and cop AU or king and knight AU because those obviously have dynamics that aren't inherent in our Dream and George. For the style of fic I like to write, which is mostly IRL or "reality" based with a twist, you can only guess at what you think is real and true to each one of them and focus on drawing that part of them out, in regards to whatever the plot needs. With "Fallen," George's mom's divorce is the catalyst that draws them together, so we needed the angst of George seeing that relationship fall apart and wondering if his relationship with Dream will inevitably go the same way. In "Deep in the Dream of Game" their lives are at stake and so the protective side of each of them comes out and the strategist side of Dream that works to get them home and keep everybody together and alive. I hope that makes sense. In "Shine Here to Us" George's jealousy of Dream having a child with someone else prompts him to rearrange his life (again) in order to be the closest person to Dream, to do it with him.

We've seen snippets of private George, of how he keeps information close to his chest, how he doesn't talk about past relationships, etc and I channeled that into Fallen. We've seen Dream be protective over George -- the cooking stream and telling him not to put his hand in hot oil, "Tiktok fix your shit", etc and I channeled that into Deep in Dream. Anytime Dream expresses interest in someone else, George gets jealous (I feel like this happened with Foolish) -- and thus a nugget for Shine here to us.

I do try to be respectful of their boundaries. Before George's last name was in his meet-up vlog, I'd seen it in lots of stories and that never sat right with me. Not in a way where I'm passing judgment on those writers, I wouldn't, it's just a line I myself wouldn't cross. I've made guesses at things based on stories they've freely told us, but I've been lucky enough to avoid doxxed info. I came into fandom twitter space (where most of it seemed to leak) after that seemed to die down--or I was lucky enough to avoid it, I dunno. My friends said there were times doxxed info would be in replies to cc'd tweets and I never saw that, which I'm grateful for. I've been on tumblr a LONG time, but on this account, I've never gotten critblur asks like most of the big blogs did (So I've been told after the fact, and also THIS IS NOT AN INVITATION TO SEND THEM TO ME, DO NOT). So, I don't go looking, and I don't incorporate private information into my stories.

I think if I had been shown private info, I'm pretty good at forgetting things. I have to double check stories with my friends and betas all the time, so I think I'd be okay at not using that info.

It's interesting to me to see the line of fandom moving as I've aged in fandom. A lot of people in this community are young (which is great!) but the "rules" of this fandom are a lot different from other fandoms. Though, I do think it's really cool to have the main three--dream team--cool with being shipped and written about. I think Dream made a really smart choice when he was blowing up. (not to say I think he played into queerbaiting--he's a person not a corporation and can't queerbait. I'm pretty sure he and George are just like that.)

I firmly believe he did a lot of research on cultivating a fandom when he started popping off and when he realized his audience was primarily LGBT and leaning female, he embraced it and encouraged them in things that female leaning people tend to do in fandom, which is, mostly transformative works. There's an interesting article that i can't find that talks about the traditional "roles" of men vs women in fandom spaces and men do more archiving and collecting ((think racecars, pokemon cards, mcc reddit spreadsheets, etc)) which is not to say women can't do that, but apparently women lean more towards writing fan fiction and drawing fan art. I think that article didn't talk about trans or nonbinary people but I see a LOT of them in this space, which is, again, amazing.

Anyway, Dream's growth in large part is tied to not only his creative videos and terrific editing skills, but the cultivation of a fandom that he allows full creative freedom--edits, tiktoks, analysis videos, fanfic, and fan art!! I don't know any other cc who encourages artists as much as Dream and I think that's really helped him.

But I do think that sometimes people confuse him being open with his fans to being open in the sense that they are owned information about him. They aren't. They never will be. He tells us way more than we deserve to know and way more than other ccs tell their fans. I block those people and keep it moving.

Sorry that this got way off track, lmao. Clearly I just needed to ramble about fandom stuff for a while. Sorry.

Thank you for reccing my fics, that's lovely to hear! I really love writing for this community :D

[steampunkenglish]

Finding Time, Making Time: Writing in Spite of Time Constraint

I've Got a Lot on My Plate

Those of you who know me, know that I stay pretty busy. I have a full-time job, am involved with lots of projects, and have lots of side projects. I'm learning (late in life) that this is part of my own neurodivergency (I'm not going to even try to self-diagnose here, but I have some deep suspicions about my personal wiring and why I do what I do). Sometimes, I'm a writing machine. Other times, I'm overwhelmed and just want go hide under my blanket with my Ninja-cat and crochet.

Despite this, I've managed to write a novel and a ton of short stories that are pretty darn good and have gotten some attention. This work has started a small, but growing second career as a professional writer. My childhood dream is coming true! Huzzah!

And it's terrifying because there's a part of my brain (remember that neurodivergent part?) that's panicking because it's not sure I can keep up with all that now.

Structure and Why I Try to Ask It of Myself

When I started writing in earnest, I learned that I write best early in the morning (yes, I'm one of those people). I love the quiet before anyone else is awake. If you look outside, the sky is a perfect shade of azure at about 4:30 or 5, and the shift from that to pink and purple and gold is one of the most sublime things in the world. Mostly, I just love having the space and time that's just mine (and the cats'). This has been somewhat diminished by the fact that I now live in a house where someone else also is up at the same time as I get up (my mom), but I am managing to carve out that same solitude the best I can.

I work hard to use the early morning to sit with the writing as much as I can. I write a scene. I work with characters. Sometimes I struggle or time gets away from me, especially on days I have to drive to teach face-to-face classes. On those days, sometimes, I don't get words in.

Currently, I'm using structured sprints with a group of trusted friends to help me get words on the days when I can sit and focus. That helps. It's not the most ideal, but on those mornings when I'm not sure, it's good to have that extra structure. Each day is a new possibility. Asking for help and using help is okay. I had to learn that.

I'm one of those folks where structure is important. If left without structure, I'm going to go wander off and eat ice cream and wear the same clothes for days. I know this, so I create structures for myself.

I write in the mornings for 30 minutes to an hour if at all possible. If I'm not writing, I'm usually reading. I dress like I'm ready for the day even if I'm not going anywhere. That keeps me from loafing. I keep myself accountable in some way. I post about my writing on social media. I talk to my writer friends. I write even if I'm at a convention to stay on track.

Part of this is just my way of taking care of myself, but part of this is also because of the inner terror that if I don't, I'll lose my momentum and never get another chance at this thing I've started again. I'm deeply motivated by my inner terror.

What Works for Me Might Not Work for You

Another thing that scares me is when people say, "Maybe I should start doing what you're doing." Doing what I do does not mean you are going to end up with the same results I've had. What if you get up early every morning, post your numbers on social media every morning, and knock yourself out doing what I do, and then you end up not writing the same or not getting published or not getting the things you want? Did I sell you the wrong thing? I don't want anyone to think that "This is the way."

This is my way.

This is A way.

Every writer is on their own journey. Every artist is on their own journey. I have to remind myself of this when I get a twinge of wanting something another artist has or the wish that I was farther along in my journey. This is my journey. This is YOUR journey. Each one is different.

We can learn from each other, but there are no guarantees. Getting up early isn't the key. Getting in the chair and putting words on the page is. I have friends who write only on weekends. I have a friend who wrote a novel at the Dunkin' Donuts late at night while I was sleeping, and emailed me chapters that I read over breakfast.

Find your structure. Use that structure. Write.

What Am I Currently Doing?

I started my second Kate and Shadow novel in earnest about a month and a half ago. This one is not coming as fast as the first, primarily because I had two halves of a story before I even started that first novel. This is completely different, so I'm approaching it differently. My writing structure is different too.

This time, I'm juggling a different schedule where I have to be more mentally present at work. I'm also in a different environment at home. I'm writing with a lot more interruptions because I live with two people who have no idea about writing boundaries. I've also continued to fight migraines, which have gotten better in some ways, and worse in others (thank goodness for better meds) In spite of this, I was able to write more short stories over the last two and a half years than probably ever before. This means that a lot of these problems are me problems that I can overcome.

I'm continuing to create structures and work as much as I can. The system helps me fight the bits of executive dysfunction that I have (once again, this is something that is not officially diagnosed, but I know what I know about myself). They don't always help me win, but I do get stories out and writing on the page, and that is a good thing for me and for my readers.

My goals for this year are to complete the Kate and Shadow novel and to write a few shorts on the side (because whether I want to admit it or not, I LOVE writing short fiction). I'm also excited because I have a few stories coming out in anthologies soon, so more fun is ahead. Getting stories out there means more people get to experience my weird little worlds and weird characters.

Y'all have a great week!

#writing #structure #writingtime #writersjourney #shortfiction

[rey-townsend]

"I am good at my job, but I've an entire town of folks to watch over.. you may just slip through the cracks by accident," with each word, her fingers lightly tugged at a frayed piece of the couch's pillow. Mostly because she sometimes had difficulty lying to a person's face. It was her father's fault-- the man had instilled a certain kind of fear in her, if she dared utter any false word, to the point where she could burst into tears for even trying to mislead him. Her father hadn't been an abusive man, of course. He just commanded that respect. One look of disappointment could destroy her.

"You could, but you didn't, and haven't, so I don't think you're going to because it's not a bad idea." Finally, she did look at him, so he could see how well she wore that pleased expression. "Besides. what else is there to do? If you don't go, you'll just be stuck back at home as any other day, doing the same old boring stuff you always do. Don't you get tired of that?" Probably not. His past relationship must have done a number to him, because he wasn't even in his forties and yet, one could live by that mundane, set routine. She'd wager money he went to bed at a specific time, too. Ney did as well, but!-- the difference was, it was often past midnight, before one, and on the heels of incredibly long, exhausting days that were not always the same. "Literally, the absolute worst thing that could happen is you get there, feel awkward turtle, decide to nevermind, and nope out of there before anyone has a chance to notice you." Really, far as she could see, there wasn't any downside to the ordeal.

Ney's stare dropped away, to anything else in the room to focus on as a noncommittal 'hm' sort of sound came in response to his seemingly innocent comment. Nathan hadn't meant anything by it, and yet the words still managed to wound somewhere. Because naturally, it forced the woman to have to look at herself and ask the age-old question of what was wrong with her then? People all around her, Nathan included, apparently found their people without any bumps or forks in the road-- everything was easy, simple, and perfect. It all fit right, even if it sometimes fell apart somewhere along the line. Ney had yet to get to those first baby steps with anyone. It was like pulling teeth, some of the most awkward and awful situations that never bore any fruit, not for lack of her trying. Oh, she had tried. She had lost count on how many times by now, too. Lately, she didn't see the point in trying anymore.

For herself, that is. For Nathan? Absolutely, he should try. His luck in that department held a much better success rate, even if the last one had failed so spectacularly. In her opinion, that only said his next was bound to be exactly what was meant for him. Like Goldilocks. Or... did he need to go through three for that? Maybe he already had? Actually, just nix Goldilocks altogether, she was a picky bitch anyway.

"I don't know, I thought dancing sounded fun," she shrugged, though wasn't too surprised to find out of his aversion to it. Most men usually were. Her lips pulled into a smile at the mention of Mikael, one of her best friends. She got to be more open with that twin, actually-- more... womanly, as weird as that sounded. She could giggle and be silly and play with the makeup and wear pretty things to be admired in, and Mikael played along right with her. "You could always ask him for tips?" she suggested, because sadly Neylani had no real experience with dancing either. As pathetic as it was, she'd gone to prom on her own and spent the time chit-chatting with one of her favorite teachers about what her after-school plans were from here. And the other one, in seventh grade? She was helping to document everyone else's good time with crappy, overexposed pictures. "But it's not like you have to dance, either," Ney went on with a light eyeroll, "use your imagination. Someone asks you to dance, divert the conversation to something else so that way, you continue their interaction yet avoid the dreaded dancing. Be like-- WOW, that color on you is amazing, or try the classic 'I was actually just going for a cup of lemonade first, would you like to join me?'" She gave him an expectant look. "Be spontaneous, think on your toes!"

Nathan chuckled lightly, setting down his coffee cup on the kitchen counter before he'd moved to sit near her. "You're too good at your job to do that to me and we both know it." He'd lived on Greywood long enough to know a thing or two about the safety of the town, himself. Don't go wandering off alone on nights where the moon was full. Be cautious around newly turned wolves and vampires. It was all pretty basic knowledge at this point. But still, there was plenty that still went wrong in this town, try as they all might to keep it safe and secure.

"I could just say 'great idea Ney, but no thanks,'" Nate sighed, shoulders lifting with a bit of a shrug. It actually wasn't a bad idea, though. He hadn't really been looking for someone as of late; He'd been focused on other parts of his life, his career, his family. But maybe putting himself out there, even if it was just to meet people and make friendships - it couldn't hurt. Well, maybe it could, in an emotionally awkward sort of way, but what else was new?

"It was easy, once," Nate huffed, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck before looking back at her again. He wasn't the type to really date around, he hadn't had a ton of relationships in his past - but the one...it had been simple. It had been easy. It had simply made sense. They were going to make a family together.

And then she'd disappeared.

Maybe, for a while, he'd held onto hope that she'd come back with an explanation. But that hope had died years ago.

His brow furrows a bit at her suggestion that he might even get a dance. "Do you think that is supposed to be a selling point or are you intending to make it sound more awkward?" He cleared his throat, giving the slightest hint of a self deprecating smile. "I can't dance for shit. Mik got all the good flirting genes, I think."

[cellsshapedlikestars]

It's been a while since I sent you a prompt so here you go (but also no pressure!!!): YouTubers Sansa and Jon meet when Robb does a big event thing (he is also an YouTuber) and they have such a great chemistry that their fans keep asking for a collab and those two can't deal because they liked each other but they also had messy public breakups and they are shy of trying again with another public figure (is that too specific? The gist of things is youtubers!au I'll love whatever you come up with ❤️)

Ummmmm hello.

I'd like to preface this by saying... I don't know, I've been in sort of a slump lately and realized everything I've been writing has been pretty depressing and bleak (and by that I mean stuff I've been writing but not posting). In general, I've been feeling very blah and so I decided to try and force myself to write something light and remembered this prompt existed!

I preface this because I'm not sure I'm super happy with the final product, but I've also been staring at it for a while and I'm just going to post it. So sorry if this isn't what you were looking for!

Also, I think this is the last prompt in my inbox (except for that one from an anon that I got back in December 2020 that's become a sort of security blanket for me and I don't think I'll ever do because I'll miss seeing it in my inbox).

.

.

“Is that the cooking guy Bran's obsessed with?”

Arya's words take a few moments to make their way into Sansa's brain. Between the noise and the lights and the mass of people around her, it's all she can do not to have a full panic attack.

Sansa loves people, she does, but there's a reason her job is mostly sitting alone in her living room talking to a camera. She's social to a point, and she'd left that point far behind about two hours into VidCon. It doesn't help that Harry is here, with his merry band of asshole vloggers. It took her much too long to realize how toxic that whole group was and she's forever grateful she never really participated in their videos. But between Harry being, you know, around, and the pressure of meeting fans and constantly being on, she's losing a bit of her sanity.

Luckily, she's got Arya and Jeyne with her – Jeyne as her manager and Arya as... well, Arya's just always been good at getting her out of her own head and bringing her back down to earth. Which is what she suspects her sister is doing now.

“Snow's Kitchen?” Jeyne joins in, and Sansa's grateful for something to focus on as they weave their way through the crowd.

She looks up to where Arya's pointing and... “that's Jon Snow?”

“Sure is,” Jeyne says, a sudden, gleeful smile on her face.

“How do you know? He never shows his face.” Sansa has seen Bran watch his videos and she's never seen Jon Snow's face before. She would've remembered. All she remembers from those videos is the camera pointed at a kitchen counter, and all she remembers of Jon Snow himself was a torso, hands, and a disembodied voice.

“Oh, he does sometimes,” Jeyne waves away as she and Arya seem to come to a silent decision and change course to the booth where Jon Snow is.

“Come on, Bran will kill us if we come back without an autograph,” Arya pulls on her arm. Sansa wants to be reluctant, but she ends up following the others without any real protest.

“Hi!” Jeyne enthuses when they make their way up to the booth. It takes a while – his isn't the most crowded, but his fans are clearly devoted. And, she notes, respectful. A sharp contrast to the fans that used to mob Harry, she can see the difference in an instant. Some of his fans seem to recognize her and move out of the way so she can get up to the front quicker, which makes her feel a bit guilty for cutting the line.

Jon Snow looks first at Jeyne, who'd spoken, but then his eyes move to Sansa and she feels... ok, she is not going to acknowledge the way her tummy flips. No way. She tries to focus on what Jeyne's saying.

“I watch all your kid's cooking videos,” Jeyne's saying, and that really brings Sansa back to reality. Jon Snow has a kid? He's probably married. Her stuttering heart and traitorous stomach can shut up.

“How old's yours?” a man asks, the one standing behind Jon that she assumes is his manager. He looks kind and gives Jeyne the sweetest smile.

“Oh, it's for my boyfriend, actually,” Jeyne explains. “Theon's the pickiest eater. I've found toddler food is the easiest way to make him eat vegetables.”

“Theon Greyjoy?” the man asks.

“Unfortunately,” Jeyne sighs. The man's eyes move to Sansa and widen a bit and she almost sighs internally. He obviously recognizes her. If he didn't know who she was already, Theon (and by default, Robb) probably clued him in. She's been in enough of their videos.

“I'm Sam, I'm Jon's manager,” the man introduces with a smile.

There's a lot of introductions and awkward shuffling as Sam brings them back behind the booth and Sansa tries very hard not to show how flustered she is when Jon shakes her hand. There's more talking (mostly Jeyne and Arya and Sam) and Sansa learns three things pretty quickly: Jon started a series on kid food because Sam's son is also a picky eater, Jon doesn't have kids himself, and there's no ring on his finger.

“Get a photo for Bran,” Arya says at one point, pushing Sansa in Jon's direction. “Our brother loves your videos.”

Jon doesn't seem to know what to do with the compliment and it's in that moment that Sansa realizes he's worse with real people than she is. Sansa can be social (she used to be more social, before Harry), but she gets the sense that Jon is a true introvert. It gives her a strange boost of confidence.

“Do you mind?” she asks, standing next to him and pulling out her phone.

“Course not,” he says and moves so he's in frame. She takes the photo and immediately sends it to Bran.

“We should head out,” Jeyne sighs. “You've got fans waiting and Sansa needs to be at her panel in fifteen.”

Some awkward goodbyes (or maybe that's just her projecting), and she tries not to think too hard about how nice Jon's smile is. She tries to shake him out of her head and focus, instead, on her talking points for the Women in Social Media panel she'd been invited to.

And she definitely ignores when Jeyne leans over and whispers, “he's much cuter in person, right?”

…

Sansa is unreasonably thankful to be home.

She loves her fans, she really does, but VidCon is always overwhelming. Now her life can get back to normal.

The first morning after she gets back, she rolls over in bed and checks her phone. At first, nothing seems off - the normal mentions and DMs and emails. It takes about five or so minutes to realize a lot of people are quote tweeting her and she clicks on the notifications to see... there, on her Twitter, is a short, looped video of her and Jon Snow. He's smiling at her and she's laughing at something he said and Sansa watches in horror as her video self reaches out and places a hand on his arm.

She quickly switches over to her messages and sends one to Jeyne.

What the hell?????

It was a cute moment! is Jeyne's near-immediate response, as if she was waiting for Sansa to text her.

Sansa groans and opens Twitter and clicks on Jon's name (that Jeyne had, conveniently, tagged in the post) and she sees that his most recent post is the selfie she took of them, with some caption about how great it was to meet her.

She calls Jeyne.

“Do you know what you've done,” she groans, flopping onto her back and staring up at the ceiling.

“I posted a cute video of you,” Jeyne says innocently.

“Have you seen the comments?”

“Oh, you know how the internet is,” Jeyne dismisses, and for a moment anger flares in Sansa's chest.

Jeyne isn't the one the internet is now shipping with Jon Snow, if the top comments she saw are any indication. Jeyne isn't the one who's very public relationship imploded in a very public way not six months ago. Jeyne might be dating a Youtuber, but she isn't a public figure herself and while Sansa knows she means well, she doesn't... she doesn't really know what it's like.

And this was a good move, Sansa knows, from a PR standpoint. That's Jeyne's job after all – she's her manager, she's there to help build Sansa's brand. Jon has nearly eight million subscribers, which isn't too far behind Sansa's ten-point-three.

“Jeyne,” she whines, closing her eyes tight against the suddenly too bright morning sun. “You know I'm not... associating with other creators right now.”

There's a moment where she hears Jeyne take a deep breath. “Not everyone is Harry,” Jeyne says, her voice losing the teasing quality it had started with.

The memories are suddenly there, hovering in the corners of her mind – that one girl releasing Harry's DMs to her. The floodgate opening, girl after girl coming forward with receipts. Proof that Harry had been cheating on her since the beginning. And she means girls, not women.They'd all been so young, it makes her sick. It's not like she's ancient at twenty three, but finding out her twenty seven year old boyfriend was DMing shirtless selfies to sixteen year olds made it even worse.

“I've never heard a single bad thing about Jon Snow,” Jeyne continues. “He's never been involved with any drama, no one has anything bad to say about him. He doesn't really do collabs with any other creators except maybe some chefs, so it doesn't seem like he's a clout chaser. Honestly, he's a PR dream. And if you were going to get back into collabs...”

“Jeyne...”

“Come on! Just because he's a Youtuber and hot as fuck doesn't mean he's a bad person. Just look at you! Don't judge a...” Jeyne seems to hesitate, search for words, “a... chef by his apron? Wait, no, don't judge a cookbook by it's cover, how did I miss that?”

“Oh my god,” Sansa groans. “If I agree to a collab, will you stop trying to come up with cooking idioms?”

“Yes,” Jeyne agrees, clearly pleased with herself.

Once she's hung up, she opens Twitter again and sees that she has a DM from Jon Snow himself.

Hey, I just found out Sam posted that photo without your knowledge. Apparently he and your manager decided all of this, but they should have asked you first. I can take it down if you want.

She stares at the message for too long before responding.

It's a good photo, it'd be a shame to delete it.

…

“The video title will be something like – Cooking Sansa Stark's Favorite Meal,” Sam tells them as he fiddles with the camera settings.

Sansa feels anxious, though she's been doing this for nearly four years now. She's perfectly fine in front of her own camera.

It's that Jon's audience is so different from hers, that's what's making her nervous. It definitely isn't Jon himself. She definitely doesn't notice how nice his arms are in his tight tee or how perfect his ass is in those jeans or even that stupid man bun that she should hate but absolutely doesn't.

“Here,” Jon hands her an apron and she busies herself tying it on and not watching Jon's hands as he ties his own. She absolutely doesn't wonder what his hands would feel like on her.

She is not getting involved with another creator ever again.

She made that promise to herself after Harry and she repeats it, over and over, in her head. It doesn't matter how attractive she finds Jon, it doesn't matter how nice he is.

“I still maintain it should be Cooking a Romantic Meal for Two,” Jeyne chimes in and Sansa feels her face heat and she can't bring herself to look at Jon.

It's not like they haven't acknowledged it – the way the internet has starting gossiping about them. And Jeyne and Sam have been very active in hinting about this collab and that's done nothing but fan the flames. Jon had pulled her aside when they got here to make sure she was ok with it all, which was... nice of him. She wishes he weren't nice, it would make her stupid crush on him easier to ignore.

“That's a little too pandering, even for you,” Sansa finally manages to say, which makes everyone laugh.

“So,” Jon says after they've done the video intro and he's explained to the audience what they're doing, “sushi is your favorite meal?”

“Well, I think my actual favorite meal is my mom's pot roast, but sushi is always my go-to when we're figuring out where to eat. And it's definitely not something I'd try making at home.”

The video goes well, she thinks. Jon gives her instructions and she follows them as best she can and she learns all sorts of things about him. He's from Winterfell, just like her, and he started this channel while he was in culinary school because all his friends kept asking him to cook for them, and he started making instructional videos out of spite. He has a dog (which he promises to let her meet once they're done the video, because Ghost isn't allowed in the area where they film, for food safety reasons). She also learns that he often donates his extra food to a local halfway home. Sam's the one to tell her this, and she watches the tips of Jon's ears turn red as he shrugs it off.

By the end of filming, she realizes that her small crush on Jon Snow has definitely evolved into full blown. And then, when she finally tries the finished product, she almost moans around the chopsticks and tells him that she loves him.

Luckily, she does neither of those things and saves herself the embarrassment.

…

This wasn't her plan, honestly.

She runs a fashion and lifestyle channel, it only makes sense that in her channel's collab video, they'd do something related. And Jon Snow is known for only ever wearing the same thing in his videos – black tee, jeans. That's it. Even in his public appearances and the few photos he's posted of himself on social media, its the same.

“Sometimes he puts on a flannel when it's cold,” Sam had amended with a laugh when Jon had grumbled about this observation, when it was decided that Sansa would buy him outfits in various styles and make him try them on for her video.

She swears she had started out with the most innocent of intentions.

She never intended to end up on top of Jon Snow in her bed while he's half dressed in khakis, the pink golf shirt he'd been wearing thrown somewhere on the floor behind her.

But, well, here she is.

“Sam and Jeyne are waiting,” Jon says, breathless and panting when they pull away for air.

“It's not my fault you look hot in soccer dad chic,” she grins, trailing her hand down his stomach to the waistband of the khakis. He laughs, head falling back against her mattress.

It's also not his fault that when she'd knocked on her bedroom door, where he was changing, and asked if everything was alright, she'd mistaken his response as a request for help and opened the door to find him shirtless.

(It might be her fault, though. She swears he asked her to come in, but now that she's taken a moment, that might have just been wishful thinking on her part. She's just glad he doesn't seem to mind that she'd barged in on him changing. Or that she practically threw herself at him.)

“I can't believe you actually got me to wear this,” he mutters.

“Just wait for beach vacation chic,” she teases. “Board shorts and a fun floral shirt...”

He groans, but there's still a smile on his face and she thinks he doesn't mind much at all. She's just about to lean down to kiss him again when Jeyne calls from the living room, “everything ok in there?”

“Guess that means we should get back to it,” Jon sighs, though his hands stay at her hips and he doesn't look like he really wants to get up. It's up to her to finally crawl off the bed and she pulls at his arm to make him sit up.

“Your next outfit's there,” she points at a stack of clothes. She's just about to leave when she turns and says, “maybe we shouldn't tell Jeyne or Sam about this? Until we figure out what...” She trails off, feeling suddenly shy, even though this is her apartment and they're in her bedroom and Jon had definitely seemed into that kiss. But Harry is still there, in the back of her mind.

“I'd like to take you out,” Jon keeps his voice low so no one but her can hear. “If that's alright?”

“Yeah,” she whispers, trying to tamp down the fluttering of her heart. “I'd like that.”

She leaves and closes the door behind her and takes a moment to lean against the wall of her hallway to try and process everything.

Getting involved with another creator is not something she ever intended, and maybe this will all be a huge disaster like Harry was but... but there's a part of her that thinks it won't be. There's a part of her that knows, somehow, that Jon is different.

She tries as hard as she can to wipe the stupid, besotted smile off her face before she walks back out to the living room, where Sam and Jeyne are waiting.

“Everything good?” Sam asks, eyebrow raised.

“Oh yeah, bit of a mix-up with the outfits, it's all sorted,” she says as breezily as she can.

“Good,” Jeyne nods. “Now, before we start filming again, why don't you fix your hair so the audience doesn't figure out you two mauled each other between takes?”

[kim-jonghyeon]

Kim Jonghyeon Interview [1st Look, November 2022]

[source - thank you discopixi!]

We've seen "Acrostic Poem Master" Kim Jonghyeon in action. (laughs) How many have you done at this point?

I'm not sure. I did so many when we shot the 1st Look digital video today. Making acrostic poems is like solving problems. More than being good at it, I feel like I get lucky every now and then so I get a pass.

It's like your talent. Once you've done it one time, it's a special skill that you often get asked to do elsewhere. That's how deep of an impression it left. Is your album coming out in November in its final stage?

We've been working on it for about three months. Finally, we've finished recording, but there's still a lot to do. The album's name is MERIDIEM. It's Latin for "noon", when the sun is at its strongest.

It's quite meaningful for a start. What were your expectations or mindset for your first solo album?

It is. Since it's the first album that has my name on it, that's filled with only my voice, I was actually more scared than excited. While I was working on it, I kept thinking about how the fans would listen to it or receive it. That was how I managed to control my fears.

Though you wanted to know about others' reactions, you must have had a lot of time to focus on yourself while preparing for the album on your own.

Since I focused entirely on myself, I felt a lot of things in that time. I would sometimes think, "I can do this kind of voice" or "I can express this much." Though on the other hand, it was through those thoughts that I became deeply aware of my shortcomings.

What were those shortcomings?

When I was promoting in a team, I was mostly doing rap, so I didn't have a lot of time to practice singing. While I was preparing for my solo album, I had to fill up an entire song on my own so I practiced a lot, thinking about what I lacked.

Since it's a solo album, the album name must have just been the start of a lot of decisions you had to make. Did your decisions have more weight this time? We heard that you were the type to think alone about a decision for a long time before making it.

I thought so much about what kind of music I wanted and how to express it. So it was hard just to do it based on my own opinions. I talked a lot with my company's CEO, and he said that it would be good if we could fully express what the person called "Kim Jonghyeon" is thinking right now. Those words alone really got to me. Maybe that can be read when people listen to the album.

You've been credited as the writer of several songs while Nu'est was promoting. Will we be able to hear some of your lyrics this time as well?

Songs I've written are in this album. We're done working on it, but I got quite interested in it so I intend to keep writing more lyrics.

What aspect of it are you interested in?

Firstly, I thought that I'd like to tell my story. Each person has certain stories only they can tell and lyrics are the same. I want to record all my thoughts and feelings. That process was really interesting.

Ordinary things that leave an impression can one day be written as lyrics.

That's right. I have times when I think, "Oh, this is a nice word? This topic is good, too" just passing by somewhere. Then I usually write it in the notes app in my phone so I can use it for later. Lately I've been listening to emotional hiphop music. When I look at the lyrics, I feel like I naturally learn things. "This is how someone might think. This is how someone might express themselves."

Another special thing about this album is that it's been 10 years since your debut. There must not have been a lot of time to cut yourself some slack while you were going through it. Since it's all passed, what are some things that have crossed your mind since then?

I think I've learned how to be a bit more relaxed. When you look for the answers calmly, instead of hastily, you're able to get a better answer.

Have you also gone through a slump before you were able to reach that calmness?

Of course, in that length of time, it's impossible not to have gone through a slump. I wasn't able to get over it masterfully every time, but I just didn't want to get too consumed by that feeling. When I get faced with difficulties, I'm the type to go, "Let's do the things I can do first." It's hard not to think that a difficult time won't turn into a slump that lasts forever, but that's just how I choose to spend that time.

You seem to have learned how to think realistically having been through a lot over a long time. You don't have any anxieties over this new album?

Since I have to show my whole self, "Kim Jonghyeon" the artist, I've prepared more thoroughly. I've done my best, thinking, "Let's keep going until [the album] comes out," and as time passes, I keep thinking I have to do even better. Though of course, this isn't to think hastily or impatiently.

You showed your whole self in today's shoot, too. Though you've had solo shoots during your group activities, is your mental attitude a bit different now?

It felt like it was a new start. Talking about my album in this interview and hearing questions about myself makes me feel like the time for me to show everything I've prepared has truly come. I even tried poses that I probably wouldn't have done on any other shoot.

Now that we've finished the shoot and we're doing the interview, the time on the clock says that it's 2:30 in the afternoon. Since your album's concept is MERIDIEM or noon, when is your favorite time of day?

My favorite is the cool night time, from about 9pm to 12mn?

You posted a picture of the Han River a few days ago, and it was right around that time.

Yes, I was driving with my sister and we stopped for a bit and took that photo.

Are you close with your sister? That's a little different from when people usually talk about their siblings.

My sister was the first person who listened to the track in this album after I recorded it. She didn't beat around the bush and say "Good job," but instead was really honest and said, "This is what I felt, what if you try this?" Talking with my sister made me think, "This is probably what the public will feel when they listen to this song."

Family can always give it to you straight.

Yes. There were a lot of times when I purposefully said, "You have to tell me this objectively." I have a lot of affection for my own songs, so there's obviously a lot of things I won't be able to see for myself.

For a while, it was brunch or painting pictures, but is your new hobby going on a drive?

I've been so caught up in working on the album lately that I don't really have time for hobbies. Once album promotions finish and things calm down, I might paint again. These days, I feel satisfied with small healing points of my day rather than doing hobbies. Depending on my mood on a certain day, I feel a lot better if I just eat something delicious. I try not to think of anything too heavy or serious in that moment and I feel happier.

There are only two months left in the year. What did this year mean to you?

This year has a lot of different meanings for me. It was the year my group activities ended, and the year I had a new start as a solo artist. I've received a lot of love and support from so many people, so without hoping for much more, it was a year when I can think, "I wish I could be with these people, just like now."

You've previously beautifully said that this album was "a flower that bloomed on the road Nu'est walked." When the promotions for this album end, what meaning do you hope it will have for you?

Hmm, the start of my journey. This is my new start, right? I can't know what will happen in the future, but happy memories might arise and more precious people might appear. There's obviously no way to have only good things happen. But even if had things happen, I think there will always be something to learn within that. So I wish this album could be the start of my journey and I want to feel a lot with this start.

[this is a fan translation by a non-native korean speaker and may contain inaccuracies. it has not yet been proofread or edited.]

[wanderlustphatty]

Boxers:: FWxFem!Reader

Summary: Fred and Lee opt for a night in with the reader, and choose some interesting attire.

Warnings: Implied steaminess, kisses. Mostly humorous.

Word count: 1584

Notes: I have no clue why I even did this. It started as a joke, but I could actually see this happening with Fred and Lee lol. I hope you all like it! Hopefully it gives you some serotonin.

Masterlist

"Fred, put your pants on!"

"No."

"Pants time!"

"No."

"Pants party!"

"NoOo."

A sigh escapes her lips as she stares at her husband gaming in his boxers and a t-shirt on the couch. Normally she wouldn't be this adamant, but Lee would be by soon and the three of them were supposed to go out to eat. After all, this whole plan was concocted by them and not her. So why not get dressed? It was normal for the stubborn twin to be fashionably late, but that never stopped her from trying to get him more organized. 

"Lee will be here shortly, love. You need pants," she tried to reason with him. Instead she's met with a smirk and a quick glance. "He's seen me naked before you. Boxers won't bother him." To this she rolls her eyes and turns to walk back into the kitchen. Again, defeat. What would make him budge?

Before she can finish her thought, there's a knock at the door and her husband chimes in telling whoever was outside to come in. Luckily it was Lee and not some stranger. Mentally she makes a note to keep the door locked just in case.

He pauses at the door for a moment, acknowledging that his friend still wasn't fully clothed, and then casually asks "So uh, we still going out tonight, or staying in?" His eyes dart to her and back to the lanky ginger. Yet again Fred answers, this time with his nose curled up slightly. "I was hoping the missus would let us have a relaxing night at home." 

She looks over at him, her gaze searing for a moment before being talked down to an exasperated agreement. "Fine," she says with the slight shake of her head and a small smile tugging at the edge of her lips. It wasn't like it was a date or anything, because he would never pass that up. "I'll order pizza, unless you two want something else." The both of them answer in near unison saying that's fine, and she turns to grab her phone. 

By the time she turns back around, she catches Lee discarding his pants at the door, just like he did his shoes, and heading on into the living room. He and Fred both are laughing as he picks up the second controller and makes himself at home. Neither of the two paused to think that hanging out in their underwear might seem a bit odd. Is this what they did in Gryffindor tower?

Apparently her stares and the lack of talking on the phone made her husband look up. "Everything ok, babe?" Lee turns around to look at you as well, but they both seem fairly oblivious to the awkwardness of the scene. Finally she manages to ask "You two comfortable?" Confusion knits across their brows before it finally dawns on them and they both burst into laughter again. "You got a few husbands when you married me, love. Lee's one of them. If you hurry up and order the pizza, you can run upstairs and put some boxers on too. It'll be a boxers party then." He winks and crimson dusts her cheeks. Again, both guys laugh.

Instead of replying, she simply turns to walk back in the kitchen. She grew up with all the boys, so it wasn't uncommon to see a shirtless George, have Lee stay a few days, and watch Ron wear the same shirt for two days. For some reason though, this was the first time any of his friends had shucked down to their boxers in her presence. In a way she felt honored because of how comfortable Lee felt, but at the same time, underwear is pretty intimate. 

With a sigh she shoves the awkwardness out of her mind and dials the number. Moments later she hangs up the phone, dinner on its way, and reluctantly walks up the steps to her shared bedroom. Fred's eyes watched her as she ascended to the next floor, a mischievous smile playing across his lips. Deep down he knew he could get her to do anything he wanted, including participating in a "boxers party", as he put it. Just as he watched her, she watched him as if to convey he owed her in some way for pushing her boundaries with his friends. As his smile spread and realization started to register within his brain, the controller in his hands vibrated, signaling a defeat of sorts. He quickly turns to Lee and both of them let out amused and defeated groans, but agreed to continue the game.

In her room she found a pair of boxers she had normally reserved for pajamas and slipped them on over her panties. She wasn't brave enough to wear them like the boys did, so the thin layer of fabric beneath them gave her a sense of protection and security. Her third husband by marriage had no business seeing any of her unmentionables if the underwear was less than conservative. As she gives herself another look in the mirror to make sure she looks good, she hears Lee cheer and Fred let out a loud, yet amused "NO", meaning Lee had won that round. 

Deciding not to drag her feet anymore, she heads back down the steps, catching her husband's eye as she rounded the bottom step to go into the living room. Brown eyes analyzed her figure from toe to head and his eyebrows peaked. His lower lip pulls between his teeth, making her blush slightly. Even when she's wearing pajamas, he was able to make her feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. Quickly she motions to the TV screen to remind him to focus, and just in time too - it was time for his character to jump. After successfully clearing that obstacle, he winks at her and nudges his head at the place next to him on the couch. Before she can make it there, though, the food arrives and she retrieves that before coming to take her place.

Both guys pause their game to eat and chitchat. Conversation was always easy with Lee, and there was never a dull moment when he was around either of the twins. No matter the situation, he was always happy to be there with his friends. Stuffy restaurants would never be either of their scenes, and she admits that part of her expected one of the guys to flake on going out. Truth be told, she was happy to be in comfortable clothes as well. 

As she half listens to the conversation about the Chudley Cannons, her thoughts and her bite of pizza are interrupted by a long finger trailing up the side of her thigh. Her eyes dart up to Fred and she's greeted with a mischievous smile. The finger trails back down and she feels the breath hitch in her chest. He absolutely had plans to make up for staying in. Quickly she looks at the other couch to see Lee more focused on where he's going to bite next on his slice of pizza, thankfully. She turns back to Fred and smiles before mouthing "behave". A pout forms on his lips and his brows knit in fake sadness before he mouths back "where's the fun in that?" This man.

"Do you think Egypt'll actually make it to the Quidditch World Cup this year?" Lee's question interrupts their moment, but the clever ginger doesn't miss a beat. "Y'kidding me? It's going to come down to Romania and Argentina. Egypt has played alright so far, but they nearly lost it to Chad, of all teams." Immediately the two are engrossed in a discussion about various teams, but the long finger that traced her thigh was replaced by a hand that pulled one of her legs up to his lap. His hands gently work at the muscles in her calf and gradually start to make their way farther toward her center. 

"What do you think, babe?" Her attention snaps up, meets her husband's, and she tries to speak, but her voice comes out hoarse and she has to clear it. His eyes seem to twinkle, knowing even that small gesture was enough to occupy her thoughts. "Excuse me. Sorry about that. I, uh, personally I'm thinking we'll see Transylvania and Scotland." Their gazes hold for a moment while Lee begins to explain why Scotland or Transylvania would be a better choice than Argentina. So it's not too obvious, though, the twin looks back at his friend and nods in agreement. 

Their night consisted of video games, quidditch talk, and a brief moment of dating advice for their friend. As always, their hang out session was fun, and Fred politely tried to get his friend to stay the night because they had lost track of time and it was after midnight before he started preparing for his departure. He declined as he hopped to pull on his pants, giving the excuse of having to work in the morning, and left when he got his shoes on. No sooner than the redhead latched the door, though, she knew it was on.

Quickly he turns and gives her a delicious grin before picking her up. Instinctually she wraps her legs around his waist and giggles. Hungry lips trail kisses from her jaw down and he nearly growls in her ear. "I've been waiting to do this all night." Chills scatter her skin and he carries her upstairs.

Masterlist

[tj-crochets]

I ask this genuinely: how do you manage to create so much? I really admire how much you make things, and enjoy your hobbies so much. I'm trying to figure out how to feel motivated to do projects again

This got extremely ramble-y, so it's below a read more

A lot of it is honestly luck? I have a stay-at-home job that has a fair amount of down time* where I have to be sitting at my computer in case someone emails me/messages me/calls me but can make things while waiting for emails, and it pays enough I can afford to live and buy craft supplies. I've also had a bunch of people, including relatives, neighbors, friends' relatives, and strangers destash and give me a lot of craft supplies for free. Part of it is that I get...idk how to word it. Antsy and listless when I haven't made things in a while? Making things is enrichment for me, and I know that, so I make a point to not go more than a few days without making something. Sometimes I don't want to make things, but I know I'll feel better if I finish a project**, so I'll crochet a little monster or make a tiny witch hat or something, and usually once I start making something I feel better and want to keep making things. Part of it is that I let myself make things on a whim. I've accumulated enough colors of minky, yarn, and embroidery floss*** that I can pretty much make any small thing I think of immediately after I think of it. This isn't universally applicable advice; I have the storage space to (mostly) store it neatly, and I know myself well enough to know I will absolutely lose enthusiasm for a project if I have to wait too long to start it. If I'm making a quilt but have a strong urge to make a tiny monster, I will take a break from the quilt to make a monster (I sometimes struggle with finishing big projects because of this, but it's a work in progress, and I always finish the project eventually). I also love craft supplies as decor. I let myself switch between hobbies as I have the urge to, and trust that I will eventually go back to previous hobbies. I used to guilt myself about changing hobbies, but now I embrace it. Learning new things is good for me! I just spent like three months quilting, like two weeks making doll clothes and a doll to fit them, and now two and a half days embroidering. I'm thinking about making a teddy bear sized tricorn hat. A few weeks ago I made a chain mail/scale mail bracelet, and before then I think it had been like five years since I made anything with chain mail. Sometimes I do get caught up in guilt about crafts. Like, guilt that I promised to make someone something and haven't yet, or that I spent money on supplies but haven't used them, or that someone bought me supplies and I haven't used them. It can absolutely drain all my crafting motivation. When that happens, I try to take a step back, and find what is stopping me/causing me guilt. Is a gift late? That's okay, my friends and family understand crafting takes time and won't be upset. Did I spend money on supplies and not use them yet? That's okay, picking them out brought me joy and inspiration and I will use them in the future. Someone bought me supplies and I haven't used them? How awesome that they thought of me! Someday I'll make something cool with that stuff, and it's great to have another metaphorical crayon in my crayon box to open up more possibilities of things to make. Sometimes I also get hung up on patterns, where part of it is just utterly unenjoyable to me and I can't bring myself to start making the thing. When that happens, I try to figure out what bugs me about it. Is it too complex a pattern? Okay, I'll pick a simpler one. Do I hate hand sewing applique? Okay, I'll look up machine applique, or use a different fabric that doesn't need applique, or pick a different pattern. I think I might've gotten a little off topic? Part of it is also that I struggle to focus on watching shows or even sometimes reading if I am not also making something.

*I mean, it varies day to day, but a lot more downtime than my first job

**there's some neurochemical thing about finishing a project, especially when the finished project creates a tangible object? ***I used to make friendship bracelets