#The bats & everyone else that knows Damian: 🤨

[brucewaynehater101]

Turns out Janet was actually a swan maiden, Jack stole her cloak of feathers. Instead of being an obedient, biddable wife, as he expected, Janet channeled the swan. She was unruly, aggressive, and utterly two faced since to everyone else she looked like the epitome of grace and serenity.

She was also very monogamous and even more angry at being caught by Jack because she was already pregnant when he took her feathers! Tim's bio parent was some random wizard who turned out not to be worth Janet's loyalty, especially since the idiot assumed that Tim was Jack's child despite the timelines not actually working. Jack was also stupid enough to assume Tim is his son.

Tim finds his mother's cloak after he gets back from the Brucequest. It doesn't have the same power to bind him the way it bound his mother, but they were her feathers, she is his son, her blood, and he can wear them.

Tim mostly takes to napping in the pool at the manor or some other body of water there since none of the Bats, or Damian's pets, will bother him while he's a swan making it a safe place to sleep. He does not tell the Bats that he's the swan. YJ knows and they put a pond into their base where Tim can hang out.

Yo? Is this based off of that one myth/legend/story where magician turned swans into women to try to marry them? I don't remember much about that story, but hella sus for the magicians. They can't manage to find someone they are compatible that they try to turn animals into humans hoping the animal will be so grateful they fall in love with the magician 🤨

I don't know about y'all, but if someone, without my consent, transformed me into another being hoping I'd marry them, I would commit a murder. This is all I've known. I don't want to be anything else.

Anyways, I'm not too sure about the cloak of feathers part. Is that similar to the selkie? Selkie have a "coat" that allow them to turn into their seal counterparts. In the legends, humans who obtain the coat thus trap selkie on land and can force the selkie to do what they want (like pieces of shit). This usually leads to nonconsensual marriage. I'm not an expert, so feel free to look more into this myth. I like AUs that chat about it.

Anyways, good on Janet. I hope she made Jack's life hell for that stunt. What a piece of shit. Also, since the magician doesn't have her feathers, I hope Janet killed him. May the gods never rest his soul.

I'm curious if Tim, since he's the son of the magician, has any magic powers.

How much did he know about his mom and her situation before her death?

Has Tim ever turned into a swan before finding the feathers, or did he just suddenly become a swan and have to deal with it? How much part swan is he? Does he have any physical traits when he's human? Behavioral tendencies? Can he eat bread?

This is a cool AU I'd love to explore more of ^^

[hijinxinprogress]

Civilian Gothamites realizing they can get vengeance through Sword!Robin

Gothamites figuring out if they happen to mention a rogue treating animals poorly within hearing range of sword!Robin that rogue will be in custody with at least four fractures and a concussion and Damian being completely aware that like 63% of these people are lying but it’s the only way he can get experience with the nonlethal takedowns he’s experimenting with bc everyone keeps complaining about how he treats his opponents and allies 

Like he’s guiding a civilian to safety and they mention that “this would be the worst thing to happen to me today if riddler didn’t stab my fucking cat” and this civilian does not own a cat but they did own a car that was just paid off but riddler fucking crushed it with a stupid ass hot air balloon that’s shaped like a fucking question mark and Damian is aware of this bc he was the one that verified the insurance claim (but he’s been looking for a reason to punch Nygma in the throat since his last Arkham escape when he called Damian a moron)

And he also knows that if he plays along with it and says ‘as if I’d let that gaudy and tactless imbecile get away with committing such atrocities’ when prompted that he’ll get away with barely a slap on the wrist like he gets three half hearted but long lectures he’s not going to listen to and an online sensitivity training seminar he goads Tim into completing (Damian and Tim 100% try to trick each other into doing work they don’t want to do and full heartedly believe the other has no idea what they’re doing)

Bruce’s tendency for finding small crashouts at risk of becoming future rogues in Gotham and deciding they need love & supervision but what actually happens bc he’s so fucking awkward is they get almost the same amount of supervision just with like an hour of intense helicopter parenting a week but honestly besides that they just have more money and resources to do fuck shit

Tim 🤝🏾 Damian: using the manipulation tactics they learned from their mothers then later improved on with help from an assassin cult and bat/cape interrogation questioning techniques on the homies

[hijinxinprogress]

Everyone in YJ is multilingual (mostly bc they’re nosy)

Everyone on YJ speaks at least 14 languages which is a skill they all use to fuck with the jl and their villains like oh??? We’re having secret conversations??? I would like to be included and everyone’s like wtf why do you speak this fucking random dialect of Russian?? This is Arizona??

They all speak binary for some fucking reason (they’re nerds) Also Kon tells people binary is Tim’s native language which starts a debate on whether it counts as Kons native language)

Diana is swearing in ancient greek under her breathe and Anita laughs before responding in ancient greek so Diana’s time monitoring yj is spent trying to make sure the public knows she did not teach those little miscreants to swear in her native language however she did teach them some technically lethal combat moves which is not better but she thinks it is

Anytime aliens come to metropolis or anywhere else on earth, occasionally Kon shows up and starts speaking to them in their native language so Clark’s like 🤨 …did Cadmus teach you that?? I don’t even know that language and kons so offended bc no?? Bart crashed our fucking spaceship and we were stranded in space for like 8 months…you didn’t notice??? I know their language bc we fucking hitchhiked back to earth (yj also pissed off multiple entire planets of people but 🤷🏾‍♀️) and Batman’s so pissed when Clark complains to him about this bc Tim told him they were doing undercover recon in Eritrea

the jl is trying to translate a threat from the league of assassins while batman is off planet but cissie showed up bc damian was insulting the jl in the leagues dialect and being purposefully unhelpful (he sabotaged the leagues plan like three hours ago and he enjoys making adults feel stupid esp if they’ve tried to baby him) so everyone else is confused when cissie laughs at damians remarks and casually corrects green arrows translation (she also invites damian to blow stuff up with yj which is immediately rejected but he changes his mind when olivers lets them know he can hear them and tries to lecture them)

clark is talking to Diana in kryptonian and he hears a collective gasp of offense from yj and he’s like ?? (Tim followed all the supers around for like a month to teach himself kryptonian and then taught Kon and the rest of yj)

J’onn walked in on Greta and Cassie discussing how to ditch their green lantern in the watchtower break room and snitched immediately bc they finished his secret stash of cookies but he also has inside jokes in martian with them (despite this yj does not listen to him in any capacity)

They all know Interlac (Bart kept cussing in interlac and decided it would be great if yj also did this) but really the rest of the jl is under the impression it’s some fucking code yj made except the speedsters are like Bart ☹️ no spoilers you promised!! and he’s like it’s not even a real language 🤨 didn’t you hear?? Rob made this fucked up cipher and I hate it 😞 it took me like six minutes to learn (they have to let it go when Bart goes oh so you don’t think tims smart enough to create a language on his own?? within earshot of the bats)

Or Anita starts muttering in patois while they’re being lectured by the jl and bart laughs and she’s like 🤨 someone cooked here and I don’t know if I like that