#The Smiths in general is so Severus core

[nekokvmaa]

I Know It's Over by The Smiths is so Severus core

No I will not elaborate

[saintsenara]

You are both hilarious and insightful, so…I’ve created a second edition of my ship ask:

Classic: Neville/Luna

Niche: Snape/Narcissa

Tastefully deranged: Voldemort/one of his horcruxes

Deranged: Umbridge/Filch

Crack: Fudge/Margret Thatcher, who canonically tried to throw him from a window (quite an enemies to lovers opener…)

thank you for the ask anon! these are amazingly deranged...

neville longbottom/luna lovegood

i have the toxic trait of really disliking fanon!luna. my girl is not a dreamily misunderstood clairvoyant, dispensing pearls of folksy wisdom. she's a conspiracy theorist.

which is to say, show me a neville/luna where they're both being sweet and taking edibles and talking about, idk, how plants are our friends, and it's a no.

show me neville returning to his pre-war awkward passivity and therefore unsure about what to do in the face of luna coming home with "evidence" that seed oils destroy the magical core and the battle of hogwarts was a hoax, and i'll tune in.

narcissa malfoy/severus snape

i sincerely think this is implied by canon - how do you know where he lives, eh, narcissa? - and that it's probably one of the better relationships either of them ever have. after all, they are aligned on how children should be raised [not as death eaters], what relationship to have with your in-laws [bella and wormtail, you are not wanted here], and what to do with a toxic boss [lie to his face]. all things that matter.

and let's be honest, lucius malfoy has selfish-in-bed vibes, but severus "i will sacrifice everything for even a crumb of your regard" snape? oh, he fucks.

lord voldemort/his horcruxes

this one obviously has several potential manifestations...

voldemort/the non-living objects the horcruxes are made from:

if you can find a way to fuck a tiara, full respect to you.

voldemort/nagini:

nagini's a lesbian, so she ignores all advances and flirts with the malfoys' peahens instead. importantly, she has only ever been a snake and the fantastic beasts films don't exist.

voldemort/harry:

canon.

voldemort/the victims

i have a soft spot for the potential of tom riddle/myrtle warren, because i was also an annoying and dramatic teenage girl, and sometimes those girls should be allowed a little crush on the hottest boy in school at a treat.

tom riddle/tom riddle sr.? well, voldemort does have unbelievable daddy issues...

voldemort/hepzibah smith? only if he got a payrise for doing it.

voldemort/unknown locket and diadem murders? why not.

voldemort/lily potter? hot, but he was too busy simping for james [no he did not face you "like a man, straight backed and proud", he ran into the hall without a wand, flailed, and then died] to notice the potential.

voldemort/frank bryce? i'm not entirely sure that soul baby had the ability to fuck, but if there's anyone who knows enough magic to try...

tomcest:

tomcest should appeal to me - and frequently does - because if there's anyone who would consider the only suitable partner for himself to be - well - himself, it's lord voldemort.

but.

i am someone who is quite critical of the default sexual dynamics in a lot of voldemort-centric slash [especially tomarrymort], which i often find to replicate a lot of heteronormative ideas about queer sex. voldemort is generally written as exclusively topping, largely - it seems - because many authors and readers equate taking that position with being in control of/more powerful than the bottom.

i prefer a dark lord who'll try anything, because enjoying getting railed doesn't make you any less capable of being a terrorist. and, luckily, there are lots of fics which feel the same way, and i've had lots of great conversations with other voldemort enjoyers about it.

but, one thing i think is worth being aware of is that a significant percentage of bottom!voldemort fics are tomcest, which - in my opinion - kind of defeats the point of saying that bottoming doesn't automatically require a relinquishing of power or a choice of passivity - obviously voldemort would be prepared to be passive with himself.

what i'd like to see more of is a voldemort who doesn't think the way he likes to get fucked reveals passivity at all, whether he's with himself or not, but atm i'm finding tomcest isn't entirely bringing it to me.

argus filch/dolores umbridge

i reckon this would be quite mutually fulfilling, actually. they do caretaker/headmistress role-play. i.e. their jobs.

cornelius fudge/margaret thatcher

fudge is elected in 1990, which means he gets to meet thatcher while she's on her way out, seeing betrayal around every corner. hurt/comfort for dayysssss.

[nevillel]

⧼ chella man, trans man, he/him / ask by the smiths + the scent of sun-hot grass under your trainers as you tromp off for an afternoon of exploration, the darkness of the night before only in the back of your mind, not following you into the light; the cable-knit sweater flecked with old housepaint and frayed at the wrists that substitutes for the embrace for which you can’t voice your need; collapsing to your knees on the blood-stained cobblestones because it’s over, it’s over, but then why does it still follow you?⧽ ━━ hey, isn’t that NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM? i read a daily prophet article on them, once ; the TWENTY-FOUR year old pureblood WIZARD is a GRYFFINDOR alumnus who has gone on to be a HERBOLOGIST WITH A SMALL SHOP IN DIAGON ALLEY. i’ve heard they can be quite COURAGEOUS & COMPASSIONATE, but i don’t know… they came off very BASHFUL & RETICENT in that interview. it really is hard to know what to believe these days though, isn’t it? 

pinterest || playlist 

quick stats

name: neville longbottom age: 24 gender: male. he is not married to any particular concept of masculinity, but he only uses he/him pronouns and the terms wizard, son, boyfriend, etc. sexuality: he doesn’t use a label for his sexuality, but he often prefers emotional connections first. he could fall for people of any gender.  blood status: pureblood and most assuredly a blood traitor. despite this, however, he lives in a very wix-y way without a mobile phone or a television. he’s not opposed to technology, just not very good with it. hogwarts house: gryffindor. he thought he was sorted wrong for a while, but he was always proud of his house. and then he pulled out the sword of godric gryffindor and killed a snake, so that’s that. patronus: incorporeal, though it can still be powerful and effective when he casts it with enough determination. wand: purchased before ollivander’s disappearance. 13 inches, solid yet a bit yielding. cherry wood with a unicorn hair core profession: herbologist. has learned hands-on, not professionally certified. small business owner. researcher residence: a small studio flat above his shop pets: none. hasn’t gotten another toad since trevor ran away from him at the lake. tends to feed the stray cats of diagon, kind of wants a dog likes: tea, hugs, springtime, the outdoors, sturdy boots and flannel, writing and receiving letters, soup and sandwich deals, spending quiet time with friends, emotional openness, cooperation and solidarity, hand-made gifts dislikes: fancy clothes, dishonesty, cruelty, superiority, severus snape and bellatrix lestrange, getting too drunk or using drugs, quidditch statistics talk, flying on brooms, having to transfigure anything, being the center of attention for too long, uneven spots on the cobblestone

biography 

[Triggering subjects in backstory include dysphoria, trauma, bullying, body image issues, child abuse, drowning, torture mentions, mental health.]

The Longbottom family is an ancient one with origins in China, their surname once Liang. However, a branch has been established in England for centuries, and they are a member of the Sacred Twenty-Eight with a complicated sense of pride about it.  Their historical alignment has not been as consistent as some families; they didn’t always Sort to one House, they married into families on both sides of many divides, they were both agricultural and urban in turns. 

One consistency was that for several consecutive generations, Longbottoms married other purebloods of East Asian descent. Alice, whose family is Jewish, was an obvious deviation from the pattern, but Frank had fallen for her so emphatically and they were such an ideal match that no one really stood in their way. And they were so happy together, for the time they had together as two independent people taking on the world as a pair. 

A baby was born to Frank and Alice Longbottom on July 30, 1996, as the seventh month died. Brave Aurors who were focused on the war, Frank and Alice were nevertheless doting and attentive parents. They had always been prepared for the possibility of war leaving their child behind, and their wills named the fearsome Augusta Longbottom, matriarch of the ancient Sacred Twenty-Eight family, as alternate guardian. When tragedy struck, Augusta took her grandchild to the Longbottom lands in Lancashire.

Growing up, the Longbottoms’ living heir very quickly realized that he was a boy. While a traditional pureblood in many ways, Augusta was also fiercely progressive, and she aimed to smooth his journey as much as possible. Great care was taken to scrub mentions of his assignation at birth and his deadname from all records, and a Hogwarts letter came for Neville, which would have been his parents’ first choice of name for the boy they didn’t know they would have. 

While the family was supportive of Neville’s trans identity, they were less understanding about his struggles with magic. For a long time, it was thought that Neville was a Squib. His uncle Algernon “Algie” Longbottom threw him off of a pier in Blackpool in an effort to get him to manifest his magic. The impact ruptured his eardrums, and while there was an easy magical fix to the injury, Neville was too scared to tell anyone for a long time, and he experienced partial hearing loss. While Healed, Neville still likes to use signs and body language to communicate sometimes. He’s curious about the use of signing for spell-casting without vocalization or wands and has wondered before whether that would help him with some magic with which he still has difficulty.

During his time at Hogwarts, Neville’s physical transition followed a schedule similar to puberty with Poppy Pomfrey helping administer the Attisgali Corrective Draught in the appropriate doses. There were stretches during his seventh year when the supply chain for Potions ingredients was disrupted. Because of this, on top of everything else, that year was when he felt the worst dysphoria he has experienced before or since. 

Because of the nature of his transition, it is not necessarily public knowledge that Neville is trans. It can be assumed that family members, close friends, and romantic connections are aware. Additionally, people who are old enough to remember him being born may be aware. As a result, while Neville was bullied throughout his school career for his awkwardness and ineptness, he did not face specifically transphobic harassment. The fear was always in the back of his mind, however, forming a complex interaction with his insecurities and trauma. He’s always been sure that he was male. He was just never sure whether he was man enough.

He helped defeat Voldemort by slicing the head off of Nagini and then killing him at last along with his friends and comrades of Dumbledore’s Army. Theirs was a bittersweet triumph, but at last, Neville knew in his heart that he was a man that would have made his parents proud. Nevertheless, he still struggles with self-worth, including body image issues on occasion. He’s trying to do the positive self-talk in the mirror thing, but sometimes he’d rather just exist.

The hope of green growing things means everything to Neville. Pomona Sprout was a mentor for him at Hogwarts, and he still conducts research with her. However, he has chosen to be based out of London instead. He opened his shop in Diagon Alley shortly after graduating from Hogwarts, and despite Augusta Longbottom’s disapproval of his relatively soft career compared to his parents’, he decided that he wanted to honor them by naming his shop Frank & Alice’s Fine Flora. 

His shop is a small establishment with a magically Extended greenhouse-like backroom for growing both commercial plants and plants of other use, such as Dittany. At the front of the shop, he sells both domestic and exotic plants, magical and ordinary, including flowers,  herbs, and vegetables, both magical and non-magical in nature. He also lives in a flat above his shop. On the side, he provides consultancy and input on everything from illegal seed possession on the Ministry’s behalf to ailing trees on the trees’ behalf. He sometimes journeys around London and the United Kingdom for field research on native plants and to collect seeds. He is also interested in venturing further afield, but recent events have made him stick more closely to London.

His parents also tie him down to London. He goes to St. Mungo’s and spends time with them as often as he can bear. They do know him and they do love him. He’s convinced of that. But he hasn’t given up hope, not entirely, that they might be healed one day, and he might know them as they were before their torture by Bellatrix Lestrange.

He is one-third leader of Dumbledore’s Army in its third reincarnation, and he takes his duties extremely seriously.  Neville has more confidence in himself now, and he certainly believes in the power of their collective action against the forces of darkness rising again in their world. He does not, however, put a lot of faith in institutions, including but not limited to the Ministry of Magic and the Daily Prophet. This mistrust does also sometimes extend to people older or in greater positions of authority than himself. 

In his mind, he and his peers have been let down and failed one too many times by them. Neville would rather they take matters into their own hands as they did before.

Neville remains in contact with many friends from Hogwarts and has made many new ones. He’s still a bit awkward and frequently forgetful, terminally clumsy, and not the world���s most skilled wizard apart from his reflexes when dueling and his exceptional aptitude for Herbology. While he hasn’t been able to bring himself to attend support group meetings, he’s always slowly processing and healing from everything that has happened and continues to happen. He’s more forgiving of past transgressions than others, and he feels that he can occasionally reach out across the aisle. He has no tolerance for bullies, however, and although he is gentle-natured, that is a vehement position for him. Largely a pacifist, he’s also not afraid to fight for what is right, yet again.

plotted/played connections 

(alphabetical by first name)

alicia spinnet - close friend. appreciates her warmth and looks up to her. is letting her teach him to fly draco malfoy - diagon alley neighbor, since they work in the apothecary. considers a colleague, still a bit uncertain about where they stand, but they’ve had some oddly illuminating conversations dudley dursley - slightly suspicious around him but trying to be open-minded ginny weasley -  his best friend. has a matching cactus tattoo with her that they can use to communicate emotion.  merry lestrange - doesn’t know it, but she’s his cousin. unexpectedly saved his life. very curious to know who she is oliver wood - they were never quite in the same circles in school, but they have mutual respect for each other. susan bones - likes her personally, wary because of her senior position in the ministry for someone their age. they fought over her not rejoining the da. sybill trelawney - former professor. thinks she’s a bit strange, respects that. does not know that she made a prophecy that once potentially pointed to him--unbeknownst to everyone, it turned out that neville was also a boy born in july with the power to defeat the dark lord.  viktor krum - secret pen pals. the two most awkward men on the planet. 

wanted connections 

augusta longbottom! if you bring her, i’ll love you forever, and we can renegotiate anything above. family - longbottom cousin! should be at least part-chinese. see wcs! professional connections - herbologists, people who work with magical creatures, other diagon alley shopkeepers, potential collaborators friends - i love a good friendship thread! feel free to assume friendship but i’ll also happily plot. enemies?? -  death eaters and their allies. people who used to bully him and haven’t turned that around. also, people on the ‘same side’ as neville but who believe in different methods and approaches to the point where they butt heads. past partner -  neville chooses not to label his sexuality, but this could be someone of any gender. if not someone who was a friend, it was likely something with an emotional level to it, possibly long-term, as neville isn’t really one for casual. if a friend, it could have been one awkward kiss or date.

any - i’m always open to other ideas!

(header img credit @ ofmccnlight)

[amorremanet]

I got tagged by @a-mi-zivi

Rules: 1. Tell us your Top 10 characters from different fandoms. (…I limited myself to five, each. Except HP, because it was too hard. Dude, that was hard enough. All arranged alphabetically, not in order of preference or anything.)

2. Tag 10 people.

tagging: @bizeke @donttouchandrewminyard @derekslaura @gentlepromises @girlronanlynch @pansexualpoedamneron @gaylukeskywalkers @scarlettwitchery @saralanceing @bpdrussell & literally anyone else who wants to do it can just do it and blame me (and contrariwise, if I tagged you and you don’t want to do it, no pressure <3)

Community: Abed Nadir, Dean Pelton, Jeff Winger, Shirley Bennett, (my number five changes on a daily basis, usually between Troy, Annie, and Britta, but I can’t pick right now, so fuck it, I pick Annie Kim and Quendra with a QU)

DC: Cassandra Cain/Black Bat, Harley Quinn, Jason Todd/Red Hood, Jonathan Crane/Scarecrow, Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy

But honorable mention nods go to Dick Grayson/Nightwing, Koriand’r/Starfire, Raven/Rachel Roth, Renee Montoya/Question, Roy Harper/Speedy/Red Arrow, Stephanie Brown/Spoiler, Tim Drake/Red Robin, and Wonder Woman, and this list was hard for, “there are SO MANY CHARACTERS, THE FUCK” reasons.

And Sandman technically is a DC title, but whatever: Death, Delirium/Delight, Desire, Despair, and Dream/Morpheus of the Endless, tyvm

Good Omens: Adam “the Antichrist” Young, Anathema Device, Aziraphale, Crowley, Pepper (Pippin Galadriel Moonchild)

Harry Potter: Andromeda Black Tonks, Barty Crouch Jr., Cedric Diggory, Cho Chang, Hermione Granger, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Lavender Brown, Luna Lovegood, Pansy Parkinson, Percy Weasley, Remus Lupin, Zacharias Smith

Sirius Black and Severus Snape get to share honorable mention status because, even though they are actually in my top ten, I know that being on the same point would annoy the ever-living shit out of both of them. Which amuses me because I am easily entertained.

AlSev Potter and Scorpius Malfoy get to share a point because the ones I love are essentially headcanon, since my take on Cursed Child is, “*nods* Uh huh… that’s nice… I’m going to ignore like 99% of it, but okay, it’s nice”

Legit Honorable Mentions:

[this is where i’d list the Dumbledore family and Gellert but it’s Complicated and i can’t legit list them without needing to Discuss it, so let’s just not even bother today]

Bill Weasley

Charlie Weasley

Dean Thomas

Dolores Umbridge

(in a way where I absolutely despise her as a person, but I appreciate her presence in the story because she is, along with Barty Jr., the only fucking COMPETENT villain in the books.

Also, she’s the actual, “repulsive to the core but makes no excuses for it just like white male villains, does her own thing and fuck anyone who tries to stop her, self-determined and she has decided to be awful, feminist on a meta level where she’s terrible just to be terrible without any excuses being made for it” villain that so many people have tried to make out of Bellatrix, when…… lol no, Bellatrix is a total fucking joke, sorry ‘bout it.

Like, man, Umbridge sucks, but she enriches the story and presents an actual, credible threat that has any kind of internal consistency and isn’t just, “I read an entry on fascism in a children’s encyclopedia and made it an OTT cartoon caricature of itself and added some cult leader BS because of reasons or w/e, and named it Voldemort, lol” — I appreciate that, as a reader, even if JKR did it more by accident than anything)

Fleur Delacour

Gilderoy Lockhart

(I blame myself entirely for making up Kingsley/Lockhart headcanons and getting Defensive of him in the face of JKR’s ableism; I should’ve known better, because shit like literally always happens to me, but I did it anyway because I never fucking learn)

Harry Potter

Justin Finch-Fletchley

(……I have post-war headcanons. A lot of them. You probably don’t want to know them, though, bc they’re depressing as fuck)

Nymphadora Tonks

Parvati Patil

Regulus Black

Ron Weasley

Ted Tonks

Viktor Krum

and a whole bunch of characters who are basically headcanon because they are literally just names who do like one or two things and that's it

Hunger Games: Annie Cresta, Finnick Odair, Johanna Mason, Katniss Everdeen, Madge Undersee

Marvel: shit, I did this one last and I have to go to therapy, so this is basically, “the order in which they came to mind and I stopped at eight bc holy fucking SHIT, there are a lot of characters”  — Erik/Magneto, Kurt “Nightcrawler” Wagner (my small blue Catholic mutant son <3), Sam, Steve, Bucky, Natasha, Ororo, and I feel like I should list someone else, but anyone who knows my usual type knows that Loki is exactly my type and I was all but doomed to be Loki trash. Which I am. Whoops. Sorry for my choices.

Sailor Moon: Fiore (……from the “Promise of the Rose” movie. ……I love my gay glam rock alien son), Tenoh Haruka/Sailor Uranus, Tomoe Hotaru/Sailor Saturn/Mistress Nine, Tsukino “Chibi” Usagi/Sailor Chibi Moon/Wicked Lady/Princess Usagi Small Lady Serenity/etc., Tsukino Usagi/Sailor Moon/Princess + Neo Queen Serenity/etc.

Star Trek (DS9): Captain Benjamin Lafayette “the rest of Starfleet are a bunch of slackers, has YOUR captain become space Jesus and saved the entire Alpha Quadrant lately” Sisko, Elim Garak, Julian Bashir, Kira Nerys, Tora Ziyal

Kasidy, Worf, Jadzia, General Martok, and Ezri get honorable mentions because this list was really hard to even whittle down to FIVE, but.

Star Wars and, “Star Trek (Everything But DS9)” were vetoed as categories because picking was hard and I didn’t feel like it.

Steven Universe: Amethyst, Connie Maheswaran, Garnet, Lapis Lazuli, Peridot

Yuri On Ice: Christophe Giacometti, Katsuki Yuuri, Lee Seung-Gil, Phichit Chulanont, Victor Nikiforov

Bonus — My Own Novel(s) bc Reasons: (also done before running to therapy) Sebastian, Pete, Josie, Margot, Lucy.