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xtruss · 1 year

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Researchers Reconstruct Lifestyle and Face of 7th-Century Anglo-Saxon Teen

— By University of Cambridge | June 19, 2023 | Phys.Org

The face of a 16-year-old woman buried near Cambridge (UK) in the 7th century with an incredibly rare gold and garnet cross (the "Trumpington Cross") has been reconstructed following analysis of her skull. The striking image is going on public display for the first time on 21 June, with new scientific evidence showing that she moved to England from Central Europe as a young girl, leading to an intriguing change in her diet.

The image and artifacts from the mysterious woman's burial—discovered in 2012 by the Cambridge Archaeological Unit at Trumpington Meadows on Cambridge's southern limits—including her famous cross will be unveiled in a major new exhibition at Cambridge's Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology (MAA). "Beneath Our Feet: Archaeology of the Cambridge Region" will run from 21 June to 14 April 2024.

Forensic artist Hew Morrison created the likeness using measurements of the woman's skull and tissue depth data for Caucasian females. Without DNA analysis, Morrison could not be sure of her precise eye and hair color, but the image offers a strong indication of her appearance shortly before she died.

Front view of the yet-to-be excavated skull with the cross. The Trumpington burial site made the headlines in 2012, following a series of excavations by Cambridge's Archaeological Unit in Trumpington Meadows

Hew Morrison said, "It was interesting to see her face developing. Her left eye was slightly lower, about half a centimeter, than her right eye. This would have been quite noticeable in life."

New "you are what you eat" isotopic analysis of the young woman's bones and teeth conducted by bioarchaeologists Dr. Sam Leggett and Dr. Alice Rose, and archaeologist Dr. Emma Brownlee, during Ph.D. research at the University of Cambridge also reveals that she moved to England from somewhere near the Alps, perhaps southern Germany, sometime after she turned seven years old.

Leggett and Rose also found that once the girl had arrived in England, the proportion of protein in her diet decreased by a small but significant amount. This change occurred close to the end of her young life, showing that the period between her migration and burial near Cambridge was tragically short.

Dr. Leggett, now at the University of Edinburgh, said, "She was quite a young girl when she moved, likely from part of southern Germany, close to the Alps, to a very flat part of England. She was probably quite unwell and she traveled a long way to somewhere completely unfamiliar—even the food was different. It must have been scary."

The Trumpington Cross is found during the excavation of the burial in 2012. Credit: University of Cambridge Archaeological Unit

Previous analysis indicated that the young woman had suffered from illness but her cause of death remains unknown. She was buried in a remarkable way—lying on a carved wooden bed wearing the cross, gold pins (also on display) and fine clothing.

Hers is one of only 18 bed burials ever uncovered in the U.K. Her ornate cross, combining gold and garnets (third quarter of the 7th century), is one of only five of its kind ever found in Britain and identifies her as one of England's earliest converts to Christianity and as a member of the aristocracy if not royalty. The best known example of such a cross was found in the coffin of St Cuthbert.

In 597 AD, the pope dispatched St Augustine to England on a mission to convert the pagan Anglo-Saxon kings, a process which continued for many decades.

Dr. Leggett said, "She must have known that she was important and she had to carry that on her shoulders. Her isotopic results match those of two other women who were similarly buried on beds in this period in Cambridgeshire."

The rare 'bed burial' was excavated over a decade ago in the village of Trumpington, Cambridgeshire

"So it seems that she was part of an elite group of women who probably traveled from mainland Europe, most likely Germany, in the 7th century, but they remain a bit of a mystery. Were they political brides or perhaps brides of Christ? The fact that her diet changed once she arrived in England suggests that her lifestyle may have changed quite significantly."

Dr. Sam Lucy, a specialist in Anglo-Saxon burial from Newnham College, Cambridge, who published the Anglo-Saxon excavations at Trumpington, said, "These are intriguing findings, and it is wonderful to see this collaborative research adding to our knowledge of this period. Combining the new isotopic results with Emma Brownlee's research into European bed burials really does seem to suggest the movement of a small group of young elite women from a mountainous area in continental Europe to the Cambridge region in the third quarter of the seventh century."

"Southern Germany is a distinct possibility owing to the bed burial tradition known there. Given the increasingly certain association between bed burial, such cross-shaped jewelry, and early Anglo-Saxon Christianity, it is possible that their movement related to pan-European networks of elite women who were heavily involved in the early Church."

Dr. Jody Joy, the exhibition's co-curator, said, "The story of this young woman goes to the very heart of what our exhibition is all about—new research making visible the lives of people at pivotal moments of Cambridgeshire's history. MAA holds one of Britain's most important collections of Early Medieval archaeology and the Trumpington bed burial is so important. It looks like it still has much more to teach us."

In the exhibition, the Trumpington Cross will be displayed together with the delicate gold and garnet pins connected by a gold chain, which were found near the teenager's neck. These pins probably secured a long veil to an outer garment of fine linen. The pins would have caught the light as she moved. The burial bed's decorative headboard will also be exhibited.

The Trumpington Cross. Credit: University of Cambridge Archaeological Unit

'Beneath Our Feet' exhibition: Other highlights

MAA's exhibition explores the traces of where people have lived, worked and died for thousands of years in Cambridgeshire. It unveils a wide range of treasures never and rarely seen by the public including:

Pottery and textile finds from Must Farm "Britain's Pompeii";

An ornate armlet and pottery belonging to a feast-loving chieftain who died shortly before the Roman invasion;

A carving of an Iron Age man with a distinctive hairstyle and mustache, made soon after the invasion;

Finds from a cemetery at Girton College now known, thanks to the work of Dr. Emma Brownlee, to have been in continuous use from Roman to Early Medieval times;

A young friar's elephant ivory belt buckle recently found in the cemetery of Cambridge's Augustinian Friary.

— "Beneath Our Feet" is a free exhibition at the University of Cambridge's Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology (21st June 2023—14th April 2024).

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carolinemillerbooks · 1 year

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New Post has been published on Books by Caroline Miller

New Post has been published on https://www.booksbycarolinemiller.com/musings/fate-lies-not-in-our-stars/

Fate Lies Not In Our Stars

“I’m back to magical thinking,” the woman emailed. She was expecting a devastating medical report after a series of tests. The reply I sent back came after a moment of pondering. “I’m imagining the doctors have misread the original data. It happened to me.” To give false hope is wicked, but medical mistakes do happen and are more plausible than magical thinking. As Alexander Pope wrote, “To err is human.” The aphorism, too mundane to serve as poetry, is a truism. Experts can’t think of everything. The toddler who penetrated the impenetrable fence around the White House is proof. Error is why we age. The process is a distillation of repeated biological mistakes. Meant to keep us in good repair, our RNA sometimes blunders when it mends our DNA. One or two mistakes are tolerable, but when they accumulate, our bones become fragile and our eyesight fades. Diet and exercise may slow the decay, but death is inevitable. Dissolution may be part of Nature’s evolutionary plan yet I marvel that blunder is at the heart of it. Because we are fallible creatures, we create fallible societies. The mightiest empires crumble. Sometimes, the fault lies in our stars. Prolonged droughts or floods trigger mass migrations. But war, political corruption, and the destruction of the environment are human accomplishments. China and Russia have stubbed their toes on their way to empire because ill-considered decisions have left their countries with younger generations too small to support older ones. China’s One Child Policy, though no longer enforced, will see its population halved by the end of the century. Vladamir Putin’s Ukraine war hastens a decline that was already in place. After years of dictatorships, its demoralized men don’t live long enough to become fathers. They die early from alcoholism and despair. Elsewhere, populations are also in decline. Contrary to the belief that humans will one day overrun the planet, our growth will peak at 8.5 billion in 2040. After that, an implosion will follow, posing a danger similar to the one China and Russia face. Americans opposed to immigration take note. Our population is also on a downward trajectory. Anti-abortion laws that force women to give birth won’t help. Nor will denying affordable childcare to working mothers to keep them at home. They work because they must. Harsh policies place an undue burden on them and increase the risk of developmental and health problems in their children. Equally regressive are proposals to end no-fault divorce, forcing women to remain in unhappy marriages. Men would be equally affected, but historically, women suffer more. After no-fault divorce became law, women endured lower incidents of domestic violence, spousal homicide, and female suicide. Efforts to control a woman’s womb overlook the obvious. These efforts do not affect climate change, a pending disaster that threatens the species. Technology may save us, but being a human invention, it has its flaws. Many fear Artificial Intelligence will one day make avatars our masters. Even so, an error has its virtue. We learn from it. Knowing we are flawed should make us humble. Knowing we are flawed should make us forgiving. When we forgive, we exercise compassion. Everyone knows what compassion is–the recognition that we belong to one another. ___________________________ 3rd book cover teaser before the June reveal

#aging is error #Alexander Pope #artificial intelligence #dangers of Artificial Intelligence #DNA #flaws in anti-abportion stance #future popu;lation decllines #humans are flaed species #no-fault divorce #population decline in Russia and Chnina #RNA #virtue of error

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drmanoharlalsharma · 2 years

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Symptoms, Causes and Treatment of Gastritis and Gastric Ulcer

Gastritis is a functional abnormality of the stomach characterized by various symptoms, with pain, or heartburn, indigestion and heartburn, the most common. Gastritis may be acute or chronic.

In the first case they are older and manifest themselves through phases in which the symptoms are more pronounced and, in acute, occur due to causes more recent, as a share of drugs in the gastric mucosa, poisoning, poor nutrition and others. Best Gastroenterologist In Jaipur

Gastritis is inflammation and irritation of the membranes of the stomach. The gastric ulcer is wound a wound-in-lining of the stomach, duodenum or small intestine.

Symptoms

Dyspepsia, poor digestion, vomiting, headache, acidity, burning and discomfort. In the case of ulcer, feels pain in her stomach.

Causes

The main causes are alcohol, coffee, fried foods and spices in general. Stress, nervousness and anxiety also give cause for gastritis. Gastritis is often associated with nervous factors, psychosomatic, eating habits or as a result of stressful lifestyles and unbalanced. There is also a relevant factor that heredity is where people are more susceptible to this disease. Recently, theories have emerged pointing to the possibility of the bacterium Helicobacter pilorii developing gastritis and ulcers. The evolution of gastritis can cause stomach ulcers.

Treatment

Must be eliminated using some seasonings, spices, pepper, alcohol, coffee, carbonated beverages, some painkillers and tablets for frying. It is recommended that the intake of foods such as cheese, flour, cereals, baked potato, soup noodles and chicken, boiled egg...

It is also advisable to make several light meals instead of 2 or 3 abundant. The ingestion of Aloe Vera juice is also very beneficial - starting with a small amount - 25 ml, diluted with water to increase the amount after one week of initial use.

The use of tea as Espinheira Santa has proven analgesic effect in addition to its healing action. Warning: If you see signs of blood in the stool, see a doctor quickly. Gastroenterologist In Jaipur

Natural therapy against gastritis

Bee Propolis

Aloe Vera (Aloe) Juice - Take a dose of 30ml (3 tbsp) 30 minutes before meals

Espinheira Santa

Wheat Germ

Balm (a handful of leaves in a 250 ml beaker of water in a blender and hits, it takes two times a day once in the fasting state and one afternoon - half cup at a time).

Ipe Roxo

Zedoaria

Resin Jatoba

Burdock

Artemisia

Tea against gastritis and ulcers

- Take a sheet of spinach, boiling and taken 3-4 times a day.

- Diet without Pope rice flavor which must be used for some time.

- Cabbage Juice fasting all day in the morning...

- For gastritis, ulcers and inflammation in general, place 20 grams of the herb called sucuuba (Hymath Scuubas) in one liter of boiling water. Let cool and drink 3-4 cups per day.

- Liquefy 1 large potato (or 2 medium) and take a small glass of "milk" 30 minutes before breakfast and 30 minutes before dinner;

GASTRITIS: Treat for 2 weeks;

ULCER: treat for 1 month.

Indicated plants

Ambrette, Amelo, Artemisia, Burdock, Calamus aromatic, Camédrio, Centaurea Major, Ceveda (Seed), Flax (seed), white horehound (leaves), Miglio (seed), Parietaria, Salgueirinha.

#Best Gastroenterologist In Jaipur

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deratoinnovative · 2 years

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Davinci figleaf

DOWNLOAD NOW Davinci figleaf

For another variation, I am going to try this dressing brushed onto sliced zucchini or eggplant prior to grilling. Fennel, widely used during Leonardo's lifetime, would also be a great addition to the salad. Leonardo oversaw catering at extravagant royal feasts and planned the remodeling of Ludovico Sforza's cheese. He also believed that certain foods would affect your emotional temperament. But did you know he was also a foodie? He believed in maintaining a sensible and balanced diet. Most people associate Leonardo Da Vinci with his talents as an engineer, artist, and scientist. Unfortunately, when I was reading this book it was during the chaos of my kitchen construction, so I misplaced most of my notes. A must read if you enjoy food and history. The fig leaf was hung on by hooks any time a Royal was present.Back in February, I read the book " Da Vinci's Kitchen: A secret history of Italian Cuisine" by Dave Dewitt. When the prudish monarch laid eyes on David’s dangly bits she was appalled and immediately ordered a fig leaf to cover it up. In 1857 a cast of Michelangelo’s David was sent to Queen Victoria as a gift from Grand Duke of Tuscany. Queen Victoria continued the fig leaf tradition. He feared that the sight of naked statues might arouse passion and lust. He continued the tradition of removing genitalia from statues. Over the missing appendages were placed mass produced metal fig leaves.įast forward another 200 years to Pope Pius IX (1846-1878). In the 1640s he ordered the chiselling off of all exposed phallus-es on the Roman statues in the Vatican collection. In 1564 after numerous hissy fits by the Council of Trent, painter Daniele da Volterra was asked to paint over all the genitalia.Įnter Pope Innocent X (1644-1655) and the beginning of the Fig Leaf Campaign. He was later criticised for protecting it. The Pope was mildly amused when Cesena came squealing to him to complain. Oh and added a pair of donkey’s ears and an ill-placed snake for good measure. In response, Michelangelo whipped out his paintbrush and added Cesena’s face to one of the naked figures in The Last Judgement. Pope Paul III’s Master of Ceremonies, Biagio da Cesena, who on viewing the work reportedly proclaimed “it was mostly disgraceful that in so sacred a place there should have been depicted all those nude figures, exposing themselves so shamefully, and that it was no work for a papal chapel but rather for the public baths and taverns”. How could such a fresco, with over 300 naked men and angels grace the altar wall of the Sistine Chapel? Critics in the Catholic church were none too pleased about The Last Judgement and accused Michelangelo of being insensitive to proper decorum. Basically, they condemned all nudity in art.ĭuring this time numerous artworks including statues were altered to cover up the nudity. He was the first pope of the Counter-Reformation and responsible for the forming of the Council of Trent. The Council of Trent (1545-1563) was set up by the Roman Catholic Church to issue condemnations of what it defined to be heresies. Enter the Catholic Revival and Pope Paul II (1534-49). It too was given a nicely sized fig leaf for a little time.Īs like all good things the pendulum began swinging the other way. Evidently, when David was unveiled the Florentines were so shocked at his nakedness they pelted the marble man with rocks. Leonardo da Vinci led the way with his Vitruvian Man and Michelangelo with David. Then came the Renaissance and it was back to loving nature, the human body and all things Greek. Only the damned or unfortunate who were depicted naked, everyone else including religious figures like Adam and Eve adorned the leaf. It was really when Christianity came to the Roman Empire did this show of nudity became frowned upon.ĭuring the Middle Ages came the rise of the “fig leaf”. Women, on the other hand, had their private area covered up in public display. You would be forgiven to think that they all walked around naked (OK, well they did at the Olympics). In Ancient Greek art, it wouldn’t be cool not to flash the male genitalia around. Ever wonder why some statues depicting naked men or women have fig leaves strategically placed over their private parts? Nakedness in art has always been a troublesome subject.

DOWNLOAD NOW Davinci figleaf

#Davinci figleaf

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chartertrust · 2 years

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Eyespy frazer parker

"We’re overdosing on cholesterol-lowering statins, and the consequence could be a sharp increase in the incidence of type-2 diabetes. It's interesting that one prominent cardiologist recently said it was a lot cheaper to prescribe low-cost statins than it was to coach patients in diet & exercise! He's right.Įxcerpt from Topol's, "Diabetes Dilemma for Statin Users" If a radical shift in one's diet can lower cholesterol, blood pressure, reduce the risk of heart disease & diabetes, and decrease inflammation-maybe it's time more people knew about it-and received the right education, coaching, & support to do something about it. It's time to recognize that muscle aches, weaknesses, & even some cognitive dysfunction can't always be blamed on a patient's age. However, their side effects appear to increase, as the dosage increases, and as patients get older. There is no doubt that they are a life-saving drug for many-particularly for anyone who has already suffered a heart attack. Statins are the most-prescribed drug on the market, with almost 21 million prescriptions written for them last year. Beatrice Golomb of the University of California at San Diego, has been running one of the largest observational studies on adverse effects of statins for years-providing a database for people all over the world to self-report any side effect to statins that they have experienced. Read their latest post on the recent warnings here.ĭr. Joe & Terry Graedon of The People's Pharmacy, have been hearing about the side effects of statins from their listeners & readers for years-and passing these anecdotal reports on to the FDA. Topol's Op/Ed was followed yesterday by NYT's health columnist, Tara Parker Pope's " A Heart Helper May Come at a Cost for the Brain"-highlighting the cognitive side effects of statins. Eric Topol, one of the country's top cardiologist, and the former chairman of cardiology at the Cleveland Clinic (now at the Scripps Research Instiute) wrote a "must read" Op/Ed piece in the New York Times on March 4, 2012, The Diabetes Dilemma for Statin Users, with a decidedly different view of diabetes risk associated with statins. ( WSJ 2/29/12) Read the WSJ article here.ĭr. I know I can lower the risk of death, stroke and heart attack by about 30%" in patients at high risk of such cardiovascular events. Nissen, chairman of cardiovascular medicine at the Cleveland Clinic, said, "There is no question that statins slightly increase the risk of a diabetes diagnosis and of slightly higher blood sugar, but I think this has no impact on the risk-benefit assessment. All statins will now have label warnings to the effect that high-dose statins significantly increase the risk of diabetes, and statins can have cognitive side effects, albeit reversible. Steven Nissen & Marc Gillinov new book, " Heart 411: the ONLY Guide to Heart Health You'll Ever Need", minimizes the adverse effects of statins, the FDA has finally decided to publicly alert us to two of statin's more alarming side effects. Last Week's Breaking News: FDA adds warnings to statin labels Note: This is a very long post that includes the latest FDA statin warnings, as well as posts I have previously written that explain in more detail the side effects of statins-what they are, why they occur, and what increases your chances of experiencing them. Caldwell Esselstyn's Heart Disease Prevention & Reversal Diet (59) Bill Clinton's Heart Disease Reversal Diet (12).

#Eyespy frazer parker

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thesoftdumbass · 3 years

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somethin' to think about

Frankie Morales x reader (feminine pronouns)

word count: 3,800

warnings: caffeine dependency, cheesy movies, the beginning of one curse word but no more. platonic Santiago x reader and Benny x reader. very fluffy and kind of silly but that's how I like it.

summary: Frankie and his daughter have found a home in Stars Hollow, and the single father/diner owner has to admit that he's found a soft spot in his heart his favorite customer.

> my masterlist

Francisco Morales, a newly single father, wanted to settle down and start a new life for himself and his daughter. After stumbling onto Stars Hollow, a quaint and quiet, friendly little town just a little ways away from his hometown, he decided that it would be the perfect place to begin again. The old hardware store that closed down years earlier was priced well and had an apartment above the shop, so with some hard work, Frankie turned it into a diner to sell the food he grew up learning to make from his mother, as well as the stereotypical diner food that he and his brothers in arms missed while they were serving overseas. Life was good in Stars Hollow, Frankie and his daughter being accepted by the welcoming if not nosy townspeople, and now he and the diner had become a staple in the quiet hamlet.

The bell above the door chimes with the entry of another customer and Frankie looks up from writing in his order book to see you heading his way, already grabbing an overly large mug that he keeps on hand just for you.

“Coffee coffee coffee,” you demand lightly and Frankie huffs.

“You sound like you’ve had plenty today already,” he says, filling the mug anyways and sitting it in front of you at your usual seat along the counter.

“Oh nonsense, there’s no such thing,” your tone and face both hold a smile and Frankie can’t help the way his heartbeat jumps in his chest at this.

“One of these days I’m going to start slipping you decaf.”

A gasp leaves you, faux offended at the threat. “You wouldn’t dare!” Frankie’s affirming hum distracts you for just a moment before you start mixing your coffee just the way you like it. “You would lose a very loyal customer, Morales. I’d have to start getting my coffee at Weston’s.”

Frankie’s scoff brings the smile back to your face, as it’s obvious that neither of you will live up to your threats. “Besides, you know I can’t survive a day without the elixir of life, and yours is the best in town.”

“Of course it’s the best, I’m just saying that your heart may soon explode from caffeine intake.”

“And what a sweet, sweet death that will be, my friend. Keep’em coming.”

Frankie has to bite his lip to hide a smile, distracting himself by adjusting the cap on his head so it sits backward. The former pilot may maintain a grumpy exterior at times, but you’ve become a bright spot in his day and your bickering never holds any heat. Another customer needs a refill so he leaves you to your ‘elixir of life’ and heads over, making rounds about the diner to make sure everybody’s happy. When he comes back to the front of the counter, there’s a mop of curly brown hair sticking up behind the thing, a rustling noise being heard from beneath.

“Evie?” At her father’s questioning tone, there’s a bump against the underside of the counter, a muffled “ouch” making its way to his ears. A sigh leaves his lips as his daughter stands from her crouched position, brown eyes locking with his. “You alright, mija?” A quiet “yes” is his answer, so he has to ask the question on his mind. “And why were you crawling around on the floor of the diner?”

A quiet chuckle leaves your lips as the young girl looks shyly at her father, then at you, before answering. “I was looking for my book. I can’t find it, and I thought I might’ve left it back here.”

Evie has so many books that Frankie can’t keep up sometimes, but before he can ask which one she’s looking for in particular, you pipe up beside him. “I think I saw The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy in the library at the inn. Is that the one you’re looking for?”

“Yes!” She brightens, eyes wide. “I must have left it when I was doing homework there the other day.”

“If you want you can come to the inn and grab your book after school, and I can make some homemade hot chocolate just for you. If your dad is okay with it, of course.”

Two sets of eyes turn to Frankie questioningly, and he couldn’t say no even if he wanted to. “Of course you can go, sweetheart.”

“Thank you, daddy!” She leans across the counter and kisses him on the cheek. “Thank you Y/N.”

“Anytime, sweetie,” you giggle, her cheery attitude infectious.

Frankie looks at the clock on the wall above the counter before addressing his daughter. “Why don’t you go grab your backpack and I’ll walk you to school?”

Evie hums in affirmation and makes her way into the apartment that she and Frankie live in above the diner to continue getting ready for the day. Frankie watches her go before turning to you, only to notice you down the rest of your coffee.

“Do you want one to go?”

“Do you even have to ask?” Your teasing smirk turns into a grateful smile as Frankie steps back behind the counter and pulls out a styrofoam cup with a lid, filling it with the caffeine that you crave. “You’re too kind to me, Francisco.”

“It’s not on the house if that’s what you’re gunning for,” he teases and you fake a pout.

“It never hurts to try, does it?” You stand from your stool, pulling your coat tight around you and reaching for the full cup in front of you. “I’ll settle my tab later. Do you want me to walk Evie back here, or do you wanna pick her up tonight?”

“You’re gonna be here for dinner anyways, I know you’re too tired to cook for yourself after the Friday brunch special. You can just bring her with you if it’s not too much trouble.”

"Your daughter? Trouble? Please,” you laugh it off. Evie was really a perfect child, you and her have gotten along famously since the beginning. Frankie chuckles, nodding along because of course you’re right. “I’ve gotta head to work. I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah, have a good day,” he waves you away with a small smile, picking up a cloth to wipe down the counter as he waits for Evie to return downstairs.

A long sigh escapes you as you sink into your seat in the diner, your back relieved to sit after running around the kitchen most of the day. Evie settles into the chair across from yours, copying your sigh and both of you make eye contact before bursting into giggles, smiles on both of your faces. Frankie finds you like that, and he can’t help the way his lips twitch up at the sight.

He makes a show of pulling out his order pad and pencil, rolling up his sleeves in the process. “Ah, my two best customers. What can I get for you?”

You hum thoughtfully, opening the menu and observing it as if you haven’t eaten here multiple times a week for years now. “I’m not sure, what would the chef recommend?”

“Well, the daily special is-”

Frankie is cut off as you snap the menu shut, placing it on the table before folding your hands overtop of it decisively. “On second thought, I’ll have the lobster. What say you, madam?” You look toward Evie still across from you, an eyebrow raised and she plays along.

“I believe that the filet mignon and foie gras will do for tonight. And we shan’t forget a chocolate souffle for the table.” The eleven-year-old provides an astounding performance, a posh accent accompanying her words.

The two of you make eye contact for a split second, and your pretenses drop as you once again dissolve into laughter. Frankie only rolls his eyes, accustomed to your antics, though he doesn’t bother to hide the chuckles you elicit. “You two are ridiculous. Burgers and fries it is, then?”

“Why of course, my good sir. And a diet coke for me, please.” He nods and walks away, putting your order in the window and checking on his other guests.

When he comes back to the dining room after speaking with the line cook about another order, there’s someone occupying one of the seats at your table. Your laugh rings out through the diner as Benny, one of Frankie’s old friends, occupies your attention, and Frankie overhears the story being told as he approaches.

“-and suddenly we have to book it out of the river and leave our clothes on the bank. We end up stranded in the jungle, every one of us buck a-”

“Not in front of the kid, Miller,” Frankie chastises as he claps a hand on his friend’s shoulder in greeting.

Benny just laughs as you lean in and murmur conspiratorially, “but you’ll fill me in on the rest later, right?”

“You know it,” and he sends a wink your way as you lean back in your seat, a satisfied smile on your face.

Frankie hears a call go out from the kitchen window that order’s up, and after returning to your table with two plates of food, he takes the last empty chair. You and Evie dig into your food as he talks with his old friend for a few minutes. “When is Will coming in?”

“Tomorrow afternoon. I tried to get him to drive in with me tonight but he decided not to leave his new fiancee until he has to,” Benny rolls his eyes at his brother’s sappy attitude but you and Frankie can tell that he’s happy for him.

The pilot nods, “Pope texted me a little while ago, he’s on his way now.” With a thought coming to him, Frankie grabs your attention with an utterance of your name. “Are you still good with girl’s night?”

With an eager nod, you take a sip of your drink before answering. “Absolutely. I’m already set up for snacks and drinks, and I’ll be scouring my movie collection tonight to find something for us to watch.”

The boys hum in acknowledgment but Evie just laughs softly. “You know we’ll just watch the same thing as always.”

It’s sort of a tradition. Frankie’s best friends from the service don’t live that far away from each other, so every few months they meet up in one of their towns. While they catch a fight or simply hang out and get drinks, you offer to watch Evie, and your weekends together have evolved into binge-a-thons of junk food snacks and cheesy old horror movies.

“And what about it? You know we both have a soft spot for the classics.”

You finish your dinner, fully entertained by the lively conversation, which is only heightened when Santiago arrives at the diner. He and Benny end up eating as well and keeping Frankie on his toes between tables with stories. You might have heard them a half-dozen times before over the years, but you still enjoy the hell out of them, the reminiscences getting even spicier after Evie goes to bed for the night.

Your long workday gets to you eventually and by the time you’re stifling your fourth yawn in five minutes, your company starts to notice.

“You look like you’re ready for bed,” Frankie points out softly.

You hum in acknowledgment, shrugging your shoulders. “I could just drink a cup of-”

“You are not getting any more coffee today, and that’s final.”

“Fine, fine,” you assent to his good-natured firmness.

“C’mon hermosa, I’ll drive you home on my way to the inn. You reserved a room for me, right?” At Pope’s question, you nod.

“‘Course I did, Santi. Can’t have you sleeping on the streets, now can I?”

Santi snorts and stands from his chair, grabbing his jacket off the back of it and tugging it on. “I think if it came down to it, I’d rather bunk with you for the night.” His comment is paired with a cheeky wink and you roll your eyes with a laugh.

“As if you would be invited to bunk with me, sweetheart.”

Santi clutches his chest with mock hurt. “You wound me!”

You smile before bringing a hand up to hide another yawn, and Santiago nods his head to the door. “Alright drama queen, let’s go before I fall asleep on my feet.” You turn to address the rest of your small group, “I’ll see you guys tomorrow! Benny, you didn’t forget your room key again did you?”

A momentary look of panic crosses the man’s face as he pats his pockets before finding the object. “Ah! Got it,” he says proudly, showing it to you.

You shake your head with a laugh at Benny and his forgetfulness. “Alright, goodnight everybody.”

Frankie makes sure the kitchen is clean and everything put away before sending the staff home for the night, the last remaining customer his sometimes-pain-in-the-ass friend. He’s just finished wiping down the other tables and grabbed the salt and pepper shakers to refill, taking a seat across from Benny when the other man looks up from his phone.

“So when are you finally gonna boss up and ask Y/N on a date?”

Frankie’s head bobs like a toy as he looks up at the unexpected words, his brow furrowing a second later. “Pardon?”

Benny stretches his legs out, leaning back in his chair in a relaxing stance. “You heard me. You two would be perfect together, and it’s not hard to see that you’ve got it bad for her.”

Frankie just stares at Benny, unamused eyes fixed on his face for a moment before he sighs, taking the cap off his head and rubbing a hand down his forehead tiredly. “I don’t have time to kill you right now Benny, come back later.”

“She’s got it bad for you, too.” Frankie’s head whips up at this, a hopeful gleam in his eyes, and Benny continues talking. “Look, you both have feelings for each other, you see each other every day, and her and your kid get along famously. And everybody knows you’re going to end up together. Last time I was here I even heard her neighbor and that Kirk guy making a bet on which one of you would make the first move.”

Frankie mutters something about “town gossips” under his breath.

“I want you to be happy, man,” Benny says genuinely, the mood shifting.

“I am happy,” Frankie defends gently.

“But not as happy as you could be. I just think you should go for it, tell Y/N how you feel.” Benny stands from the table, clapping Frankie on the back and pulling his friend into a hug when he does the same. “Somethin’ to think about. I’ll see you tomorrow, man.”

Frankie locks the door to the diner behind Benny as he leaves, flipping the old-fashion open sign to closed. Turning around to lean his back against the door, he closes his eyes, considering the possible outcomes for doing exactly what his friend said. It could end awkwardly with neither of you knowing how to act around each other and you avoiding his diner like the plague. Or, the more attractive prospect, it could lead to something he had only imagined, a life with you by his side.

“Somethin’ to think about,” he repeats to himself, making his way to the apartment upstairs to get ready for bed.

“Everett Amaya Morales, I cannot believe you just said that!” When she only shrugs at you, a brow raised with as much sass as an eleven-year-old can muster, you scoff and cross your arms over your chest in slight indignation. “So you would rather wax Bigfoot’s legs than give Frankenstein’s Monster a makeover?”

She looks at you as if it’s an obvious answer, but to you, it’s anything but. “Yeah! Aren’t you curious how much there is?”

“Oh, there’s twelve pounds of leg hair at least, but I would be afraid for my own safety! One bad rip and Squatch could rip my arm off. Frankenstein’s Monster, on the other hand, has daddy issues and no friends, and I for one think that doing his makeup would be a very good bonding experience. Besides, how do you know that Bigfoot wants their legs waxed?”

“How do you know they don’t,” is her rebuttal.

You sigh theatrically, shoulders deflating in defeat. “Ah, yes, the Sasquatch don’t live by societal gender roles.”

When Evie simply laughs at your reply, you stick your tongue out at her and she returns the gesture before collapsing back against the arm of the couch.

“How could I eat so much takeout and still want ice cream?”

“Well you’re in luck, my friend. I went by the ice cream section when I was at the market earlier, and since I know it’s your favorite, I happened to grab a tub of cookies and cream.”

She looks up at the mention of her favorite flavor. “Extra chunky oreo?”

“Only the best for you, dear,” you respond and laugh as she only throws her arms over her face dramatically.

“But I’m still so full!”

“Eh, the ice cream melts in your stomach and fills in the cracks between all the other food. You’ll be fine.”

Poking her head up from the couch, she looks at you disbelievingly. Or like you’re crazy. Or both. “Yeah...I don’t think the digestive system works like that.”

“Oh it definitely doesn’t, that’s just something my great uncle used to say so we wouldn’t judge him for eating ice cream after a big dinner. That side of the family is obsessed with frozen treats. I, unfortunately, inherited that gene.”

“So…..ice cream?”

“Ice cream,” you concur, getting up to grab some bowls of the sweet stuff for the two of you to eat on the couch as you resume the movie that was interrupted by your earlier disagreement.

You must nod off because you wake to your phone alerting you to a new text. It’s Frankie, telling you that he’s on his way to your place to pick Evie up. Door’s unlocked, you reply as an invitation to come inside when he gets here.

You’re only half paying attention to the television when Frankie lets himself in, shutting the door quietly behind himself so as to not disturb movie night. You meet his eyes and nod your head toward Evie, who fell asleep in a pile of blankets on the floor a little while ago, and in the dim light from the tv, you see his eyes soften with a smile.

“She’s out cold,” you murmur when he gets closer to you. You pat the couch next to you, noticing the way he seems a little tired after his night out. “Boys night end early?”

Frankie looks at his watch, squinting to read the time in the low light. “It’s two am.”

“Ah,” you yawn. “That must be why I’m so sleepy.”

Frankie chuckles quietly, accepting the silent invitation to sit down with you. When you scoot closer to him on the couch bringing your fuzzy blanket with you, he can’t help but breathe you in, enjoying this moment, Frankie reaches for your hand that’s now wrapped comfortably around his arm, rubbing circles across the back of it with his thumb.

You watch the movie in comfortable silence for a little while, only half paying attention, before you break it. “D’you have fun tonight?”

Frankie hums an affirmative, leaning his head over on yours against his shoulder as he does so. “Did my two favorite girls have a good time watching terrible movies?” Your comment about bad movies being the backbone for modern cinema dies in your throat when Frankie’s words sink in. His two favorite girls? Plural?

You look up at him, eyes soft, and you know that if he looked down at you right now he would be able to see the adoration on your face, so you press your head further into his shoulder. “The two of us always have a good time.”

Unbeknownst to you, Frankie is watching you with the same adoration on his face, as he can’t help but thank whatever higher powers that he and Evie found you in this little town. As he feels his chest swell with warm feelings, he thinks once again of what Benny said. If Frankie confesses his feelings for you and you don’t reciprocate, things may get awkward, but if you feel the same and he never finds out, he could hardly live with it. Besides, as he spends time with you, Frankie has a suspicion that your feelings may be on the same plane as his.

Frankie’s hand that’s been moving circles across yours stops, and instead, he grips your hand in his, surrounding it with warmth. You turn your face back to Frankie’s and meet his eyes, and the breath hitches in your chest at how close the two of you are. “I think you and I would have a good time too.”

His deep voice in your ear sends a shiver down your spine and your lips turn upward in a gentle smile. “Yeah?” Your voice sounds breathy to you, but you can’t find it in you to care when he’s looking at you like that.

“Yeah,” when Frankie’s nose brushes against yours, you can’t hold in the sigh that leaves your lips, your eyes closing in contentment. When he speaks again, Frankie’s breath ghosts over your lips, and warmth fills you.

“The guys were asking about spending the day with Evie tomorrow, they wanna have some time with their niece before they leave.” You hum softly, prompting him to keep talking. “I was thinking that while they do...it would be nice for the two of us to do something together.”

“Like a date,” you ask, your eyes opening once again. You’d hate to bring that up and be wrong, but your need for confirmation outweighs the risk of possible embarrassment.

When he nods, your fears dissipate and a smile lights up his face in the dark. “Definitely like a date.”

You bite your lip, looking down as your face warms, but Frankie reaches a hand to cup your chin, a silent encouragement to meet his eyes. The heat you find in them permeates you, and you find yourself nodding shallowly. “I’d love to go on a date with you, Francisco.”

“Yeah?” Frankie finds himself asking this time, his heart picking up speed at your affirmative repetition.

With a kiss placed oh so delicately to your forehead as if he’s reassuring himself that you feel the same way, Frankie turns back to the awful movie currently flashing across the tv screen. You follow suit, content to discuss the details of your date with Frankie later, a smile spreading across your cheeks even as you try to suppress it. With Frankie’s hand now back to holding yours and your head on his shoulder, you doze off, the presence of your two favorite people a comfort. And even in your dreams, you can’t wait to go on a date with your grumpy diner owner.

Me, writing another single father AU with one of my favorite characters even though I don't want kids? It's more likely than you think! This idea has been bouncing around in my head for a while (a la Luke and Lorelai except a little different) and I'm glad I finally let it out for y'all. If you enjoyed it, please let me know! And I'd love your recommendations for which Pedro or Oscar character I should write for next. Thank you lovelies for reading!

If you’d like to be notified when I post something new, message me or send an ask and I’ll add you to any one of my tag lists 💜 (I'll be reforming my tag list, so I'm not tagging anybody this time!)

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ilovefandoms102 · 4 years

Text

Enough is Enough

Pairing: JJ x Plus Size Reader

Summary: You and JJ are starting to constantly be harassed by the Kooks about your relationship. What happens when it becomes too much for you to handle?

Taglist:

@drewswannabegirl @velyssaraptor @kaitieskidmore1 @jiaraendgame @teamnick @jeyramarie @they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon @baby-pogue @ma10427 @judayyyw @must-be-a-weasley-92 @iamaunicorn4704 @agirlwholovescoffee @justcallmesams @lasnaro @lonely-kermit @jellyfishbeansontoast @ifilwtmfc @gviosca @fernweh-fangirl @runway-to-my-aid @eb15 @tangledinsparkles @hurricane-abigail @outerbongs @jaxandcomet

Note: This is for the anon that requested this summary, I tried to combine the ending so I hope that’s ok! I hope I made you proud! And as always I hope you guys enjoy and let me know what you think!

=======================

JJ and I have been best friends since we were in diapers. Our parents big on the drug market in The Cut. We had similar home lives in that as well, except my parents just mentally abuse me. I had always been ‘bigger’ than everyone else we grew up with. JJ and the others accepting and never having a problem with my size, but my parents were never ending on how I needed to change. There was nothing more than I hated then having to go home....

The endless comments about how I’m ‘too fat’, ‘need to go on a diet’, ‘have you tried exercising’, ‘how do you have friends’, ‘you will never be loved because you are fat.......It wasn’t just them I got these kind of comments from however, the Kooks were also ruthless when it came to body shaming....

========================================

I had started developing feelings for JJ about a year ago, he had started sending me mixed signals that just confused me to no end. For example, he would only want to sit beside me anytime we went anywhere, sometimes he would hold my hand, and he had become a lot more touchy. Which I didn’t mind at first, I thought nothing of it. It wasn’t until at a kegger when JJ got piss drunk and I had to take him back to the chateau since I was the only one capable of driving that things had changed between us....

“You know, you’re really pretty.” JJ slurred, his hat tipped way down over his eyes.

“Who, your hat because I’m sure that’s all you can see right now J.” I laughed, tipping it back up for him.

“No silly, I’m talking about you! I think, I think I might be falling in love with you.” he hiccuped.

“What the fuck JJ?!” I yelled, looking at my very intoxicated friend.

“Well...I am. Fuck, you’re so beautiful, my favorite part of the day is seeing you. Do-do you think you’re falling in love with me too y/n?” he asked, trying to sit up in the car seat.

“I don’t even know how to respond to that JJ.” I groaned, pulling into the chateau.

“Just say yes or no what do you mean?” he slurred, giving me a ‘duh’ look.

I helped him out, he was a lot heavier than he looked. I kind of threw him on the couch because it was enough getting him up the stairs of the porch. He whined when his face hit the cushions, rolling over to face me. He grinned widely, sitting up not so sturdily.

“Are you going to answer me baby?” he asked, playing with a strand of my hair.

“You’re hammered J, you won’t remember any of this in the morning. Go to sleep.” I mumbled, getting up to take his bed for the night.

“Nooo, come back I need to know! Babyyyyyy.” he whined, seconds later he was snoring.

===================================

I woke up encased in warmth, I threw my hand out to take the blankets off when I came in to contact with something hard. I turned to see JJ beside me, his strong arms caging me against him. I didn’t even know he had came in here last night....Does he even remember doing it?

“Ow,” JJ groaned.

“JJ, what are you doing in here?” I asked, turning in his hold.

“Sleeping,” he grumbled, nuzzling his head further into me.

“I’m positive I left you on the couch last night.” I said, brushing some hair out of his eyes.

“I wanted a cuddle buddy,” he pouted, his eyes still closed.

“Do you remember last night?” I asked hesitantly.

“Bits and pieces, but I do know what I said to you.” he said, cracking his eyes open. My breath hitched in my throat, preparing myself for the worst.

“It’s ok J, we all say things we don’t mean when we’re drunk.” I chuckled, trying to play it off.

“Well I meant what I said, and I know you feel the same way.” he said, blue eyes staring deep into mine.

“Full of yourself much Maybank?” I scoffed, pushing him playfully.

“I know you like the back of my hand sweetheart, which I was surprised you never said anything. I think I’ve made it pretty clear that I’m into you.” he said, his eyes searching mine for any tell of what I might be thinking.

“JJ, look at me....do you know what people would say? I can’t let you go through that.” I whispered, hiding my face in his chest.

“There’s nothing wrong with you. I don’t give a flying fuck what people have to say about us. I-I love you, and I will do whatever I have to. I want to be with you.” he said, pulling my head back to look in my eyes.

“I love you J,” I whispered, tears gathering in my eyes.

He kissed me hard, our teeth clashing together at the force. All of our pent up emotions and feelings for each other poured out into the kiss. Teeth and tongues moving sloppily, but it was beautiful. Never in a million years did I think JJ would ever feel the way I felt. I never thought any guy would give me the time of day, but all this time.....it was JJ.

====================================

It’s been about 6 months since JJ and I became official....

I was over the moon with him, never have I felt happier then when I was with him.

That was until the Kooks found out..more specifically, Rafe and his posse. It was hard enough with them harassing us because we are Pogues, but now they go out of their way to get at JJ and I. JJ of course flew off the handle anytime they mentioned my name, and I was tired of having to clean him up. I didn’t like seeing the marks on his face...I had seen enough of them come from his dad. I couldn’t help but feel like it was all my fault....

What drew the line for me was a day Pope, JJ, and I were making some deliveries to Figure Eight. Of course we were minding our own business when Rafe, Kelce, and Topper spotted us walking by the golf course.

“Well, well look who we have here Top!” Rafe yelled, all of us freezing in our spot. I did not want to do this today.

“Guys come on, let’s just do these deliveries and go home.” I sighed, trying to pull on JJ’s bicep.

“You might run out of business if you keep having fatty here make runs with you Pope, she probably eats everything before it gets to the door.” Rafe smirked, eyeing JJ.

“You watch your fucking mouth Rafe,” JJ growled.

“JJ please, they aren’t worth it.” I whispered, tugging on him again.

“Hush piggy.” Topper said, shoving you to the side.

No clue where it came from, but I had enough with them bullying us. I swerved my fist back and punched Topper straight in the nose, a sickening crunch sound followed by a shout came from Topper. Everything happened so fast after that... Topper grabbed me, pulling me off to the side. JJ and Pope were busy fighting off Rafe and Kelce.

“You will NEVER be good enough for him to love you y/n. You know that right?” Topper taunted, holding his bloody nose.

“He does love me Topper!” I shouted, frustrated tears rolling down my face.

“Who could ever love someone like you? Look at you! You’re disgusting, ugly, and fat” he laughed.

“Shut the fuck up Topper!” I screamed.

I heard a scream, my eyes tearing from Topper to see Rafe beating JJ with his golf club. I cried out in horror, going to JJ’s aid. I was held back by Topper, his sinister chuckle sending chills through me. JJ tried to fight back, reaching for the golf club to stop its attack. Blood covered his beautiful face, splattering Rafe’s shirt. Sobs wracked my body, it became harder to breathe every moment I had to endure.

“JJ!” I yelled, tearing myself from Topper’s hold. I ran at Rafe, my only thoughts were keeping JJ and Pope safe.

“No!” Pope yelled as I ran towards Rafe.

I jumped on Rafe’s back, wrapping my legs around him so I could grab the golf club. It provided enough distraction for JJ to jump up, grabbing the golf club from Rafe and tossing it. Topper threw me off of Rafe, my face hitting the gravel below. The Kooks had enough since they ran off from us, leaving all of us beaten and bloody. I looked at JJ who was starting to sway, I got to him just in time before he hit the gound.

“JJ!” I yelled, and he was unresponsive....

==================================

I sat in the ER room with JJ, machines and tubes running every which way. Silent tears still rolled down my face, the reality of everything overwhelming my brain....I couldn’t let JJ keep getting hurt for me. He has enough to deal with at home, I can’t bare bringing him anymore hurt. It was too much, my heart shattered to pieces. I knew I had to end things before they got worse, no one else was getting hurt for me...

==================================

I was huddled up in my room a few days later, not having spoken to JJ, or any of the Pogues. I had hundreds of missed calls, texts, and FaceTime’s. This way, no one could get hurt. This way would be better for them.

That’s what I kept telling myself at least....

There was a loud banging on my front door, I looked out the window and saw JJ. I froze, his solemn blue eyes made my heart clench. I opened the door slowly, met with my teary eyed boyfriend. His eyes were so red, it looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. His slight stubble adding to his tired appearance.

“Why the fuck haven’t you been answering your damn phone!” he bellowed, veins popping out of his neck.

“I want to break up.” I blurted. His face dropped, fresh tears coming to his eyes.

“What?” he asked, his voice croaking.

“I-I don’t want to do this anymore JJ.” I said, trying to sound convincing.

“What has happened in the past three days that you decided you don’t want to be with me anymore? Do...Do you not love me anymore?” he whispered, the sheer pain in his voice made me want to forget my plan.

“No,” I croaked, trying to keep my tears at bay. I breathed in, clutching tight on the door.

“You’re lying.” he growled, seeing right through me.

“Dammit JJ! I can’t do this! I can’t watch you and the others get hurt for me anymore! Rafe almost fucking killed you because I’m fat!” I screamed.

“Don’t you fucking say that again! You are not fat! You are beautiful just the way you are, who the fuck cares about the Kooks? They harass us anyways, it wouldn’t matter!” he yelled back, tears rolling down both our faces at this point.

“Either way, this is done JJ. Goodbye.” I said, slamming the door in his face.

“Baby please! Open the door! I love you, please don’t leave me! Y/N!” he cried, fists pounding on the door.

I could hear his sobs through the wood, my heart breaking as I cried with him...

=======================================

Almost a week had gone by...

I haven’t ate, slept, just stared at my wall and let the tears roll. I felt like shit....literal shit. I hated myself for looking the way I did...not only did it cost my happiness with JJ, but it put the Pogues in danger. I wished more than anything that I could look like Kie, or Sarah. A skinny, beautiful girl. Someone people are excited to see, someone who can wear no makeup and look flawless, someone who didn’t have to try....

“Kie is here piggy,” my mother slurred, stumbling back to the living room.

“Hey” she whispered, taking in my tear soaked features.

“Hi Kie,” I croaked, my bottom lip trembling.

She came to me, sitting beside me as she wrapped her arms around me. I cried in her arms, what I’m sure JJ had done as well.

“I’ve missed you,” she said, brushing my tears away.

“You don’t have to say that because you feel sorry for me Kie.” I chuckled.

“When are you going to understand that we love YOU. You are the glue of our group, you light up everyone’s day. You’re kind, funny, beautiful, and just an all around amazing friend.” she said, holding my hands tightly.

“Kie...I’m-” I started.

“You are not fat, I don’t want to hear that word out of your mouth. JJ has been a mess this whole week, what is going on?” she asked, so I explained everything to her.

“I can’t let him get hurt for me when he has enough of hurt from his dad Kiara.” I muttered, looking into her brown orbs.

“You all need each other y/n. You’re each other’s soulmates, I truly believe that. JJ can take care of himself just like the rest of us can. We would do anything for you, you’re our family.” she said, pulling me into a hug.

“I love you all so much Kie, I can’t let them keep hurting you all.” I sobbed.

“You let us deal with that, now, I think you should talk to JJ.” Kie sighed.

“I-...I can’t Kie. There’s no way he’d take me back. He-he doesn’t understand...” I mumbled, picking at my fingers.

“Alright, I’ll talk to him. Then we can go from there yeah?” she asked, raising her brow. I nodded, hugging her again before she took off.

=====================================

It wasn’t even an hour later before knocking at my door was heard again. I looked to see my mom passed out on the couch, a bottle of liquor in her hand. I ran to the door, peaking out to see JJ. He looked just as bad if not worse than me.

“Hi,” he whispered, looking me up and down.

“JJ,” I croaked.

We both collapsed into each other, crying into the other’s shoulder. I clutched onto JJ tight, afraid that if I let go I’d lose him again. We both mumbled apologies to each other. His huge, ringed hand encased my head to his chest, his lips kissing wherever they could reach on my face.

“I’m so sorry I hurt you JJ, I-I just didn’t want you or anyone else to get hurt because of me.” I sobbed, pulling back to look at his handsome face.

“I’m sorry to baby, for not understanding your reasons and just blowing up like that.” he sniffed, his hands gripping my face to kiss my cheeks before placing a tender kiss on my lips.

“I don’t want you to get hurt like that again J,” I whispered, holding his wrists.

“I don’t want to hear you talk bad about yourself anymore. I love you just the way you are...You’re perfect to me. Deal?” he smiled, kissing my nose. I giggled, throwing myself forward to kiss his lips again.

“Deal, I love you JJ Maybank.” I said, my voice cracking.

“I love you more,” he said softly, leaning his forehead on mine.

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josephloegering · 3 years

Text

The tumbling Pagan Rootless Christmass Trees

The Antisemitic Democratic Maccabees Catholic Dr Anthony Fauci and the Pagan Communist Medias, forcing upon us their Antisemitic Democratic Maccabees Catholic State's fake Jew and fake Christian Pagan Holidays, polluting the Earth and the Waters, and our Foods and Drinks, causing Global Climate Change, with their Toxic Poison Crude Oil byproducts, their so High Priced Plastic and Synthetic Toys for under the Pagan Popes rootless Christmass Trees, that unlike the mass numbers of suicides because of the previous Pagan Holidays, the mass numbers of suicides are so normal to them, they say get Vaccinated to have normal Holiday Season, begging People to donate Kidneys for their failing Kidneys, and demanding other to die to donate them Hearts and Livers, because their Toxic Poison Flu and COVID Vaccines destroyed theirs.

I am the Mighty El Yah, that they call Elijah, I am Yah Joseph Yahweh's Messiah, the root from Jesse, the Lion the Tribe's Judah's, the root unto the Trees Yahweh's, the Prophet alike unto Moses, all that stumbled upon me, tumble unto their graves

Yahweh's tumbled his from the Rabbi's contesting his upon him, thundered Yahweh, judged the end mine, the Earth's, and granted the goat unto the King's his, and exalted the horn, the Messiah his

יהוה יחתו מריבו עלו בשמים ירעם יהוה ידין אפסי ארץ ויתן עז למלכו וירם קרן משיחו

1 Samuel 2:10

The Plastics and Synthetics in their FDA approved Toxic Poison Vaccines and Toxic Poison Drugs and in the FDA approved Toxic Poison Foods and Drinks, are destroying their memories and their Kidneys so fast, most don't live long enough to suffer and die among the skyrocketing Hundreds of thousands, on their Dialysis Machines, because of the Toxic FDA's Toxic Vaccine and Toxic Drug and ad Toxic Food and Toxic Drink Additives, that they refused to stop forcing upon their own Peoples, poisoning their Immune Systems, which no matter how many unnatural Antibodies that Vaccines make them produce, their FDA poisoned Immune Systems, eventually fail, and causes the extremely Contagious Vaccine Breakthrough Delta COVID-19 Infections, and causes them to get infected with diverse extremely deadly Contagious Pathogen Infections.

שנה וחצי אחרי שתרם כליה - השר חילי ליווה את אחיו שתרם גם הוא

A year and a half after donating a kidney - Minister Hili accompanied his brother who also donated

https://tinyurl.com/95nuwhyw

The robust Antibodies caused by the fraud Flu and COVID Vaccines that block no Virus from Infecting the People, like real vaccines do, the robust Antibody activity is not targeting any Virus, they are targeting Body Cells, causing the escalating numbers Autoimmune System disorders to rise as fast as they vaccinate People, these Numbers of the Leading Causes of Death besides the runaway COVID-19 pandemic, and the runaway Influenzae pandemic, are skyrocketing because the fraud Vaccines are blocking no Virus from infecting the Body, as the Antibodies that fraud Vaccines produced are destroying Body Organs

Heart disease: 659, 041.

Cancer: 599, 601.

Accidents (unintentional injuries): 173, 040.

Chronic lower respiratory diseases: 156, 979.

Stroke (cerebrovascular diseases): 150, 005.

Alzheimer's disease: 121, 499.

Diabetes: 87, 647.

Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome, and nephrosis: 51, 565.

The Anti American Antisemitic Democratic Communist fake Jews and fake Christians and fake Muslims are running the Medias and US Government. On all the Tests that the Minneapolis VA Allergist ran, when he looked at my Medical Records, he said, "I seen this before, I give it a 49% chance that it is an allergy, and 51% chance the it is a Metabolic Disorder, I will not know which, until run the Allergy Tests" and when he ran all the Food Tests, but there were no Tests for any of the Crude Oil Product Additives in all the Medications and Vaccines and Foods and Drinks that out me in the ERs repeatedly, and the Minneapolis VA Allergist said it was not an Allergy, because I produced no IgE antibodies, and the Orthopedics Doctors said it was not Lupus, because I produce no lupus erythematosus (SLE) Anti- Smith Antibodies, and they said it was an Overactive Immune System, and when on my Hebrew Torah's Daniel's Diets that has no Egg Phosphates or D-Fructose Compounds or Sugar Alcohols or Beta-Glucans or Maize Cornstarch or Yeast or Yeast Extracts, all my blood and urine levels are normal, and because all my blood and urine levels are normal when on my Kosher Diet, CNN's TV Brainwashed Doctors and Metabolic Doctor lie with their flawed and false Sciences, saying it is not a Metabolic Disorder, because all my blood and urine levels are normal when on my Kosher Diet, and the they say that benefits of force drugging me to assimilate me into the Modern Democratic Society outweigh the risks of permanently disabling or killing me with the adverse reactions, and repeatedly put me in the ERs throwing all blood and urine levels like an Allergy so that VA Allergist said that I need sue them for repeatedly throwing all my blood and urine levels off like allergy

Repeatedly the News Media CNN and Politicians, had Judges and Doctors disable me, and many others, and murdered many of us, refusing both our Medical Rights and our Religious Rights, to refuse their Drugs, Vaccines, and Foods, and Drinks, that they kept forcing upon us, to force upon us their Antisemitic Democratic Politics, using Violence of guns, and shackles, and mace, and cuffs, and forced drugs and straight jackets, to repeatedly locking us up, for force drugging with everything on the allergy lists, repeatedly disabling or murdering us, saying that we cannot have a Public Trial, because we committed no Crime, like their Criminals, and must be repeatedly locked up, saying that we cannot live by Moldy Old Scriptures, and must be repeatedly force drugged, to assimilate us into their Modern Society, that repeatedly saying, that the benefits of forcing upon us the Drugs on the allergy List in our Medical Records, outweigh the Risks of disabling and or killing us, by the adverse reactions, and the US Government and Medias, blocking our Just Issues from their Medias, repeatedly refused to hear and Redress our Just Grieves, and armed and are still arming against us unarmed Hebrew Torah abiding Jews and Samaritans, our Antisemitic Democratic Soviet Communist Maccabees Zionist fake Jew enemies, refusing both my Medical Rights and my Religious Rights, to refuse their Drugs, Vaccines, and Foods, and Drinks, that repeatedly threw all my so the Minneapolis VA Allergist said that I need to sue them, for throwing all my blood and urine levels off like an allergy, and 50 Laws refused to sue them because they said it would Cost too much, the five Presidents and five Vice Presidents failed to Redress our Just Grievances to include the current Antisemitic Hate Crime Criminal Vaccinator President Joe Biden, that at as Vice President wrote me about the Matter, and Redressed noting, but made the Medical Communities attack me more and more violently, Daniel objected to the King's Provisions on both Medical and Religious grounds, and we demand the same Creator Granted Rights, among these unalienable Rights, being destructive of these Rights, the Rights to Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness, as the Whole Earth knows, and sees, that suchlike People denying us the Medical Rights and the Religious Rights, to refuse their Drugs, Vaccines, and Foods, and Drinks, the whole Candid Earth sees that they have lost all credibility, and are not worthy to rule among Mankind

The Antisemitic Democratic Fascist Right Wing are not the Government, like Antisemitic Industrialists from Nazi Germany, against the Antisemitic Democratic Left Wing Soviet Communist Big Government, and the US the Antisemitic Fascist Right Wing, calls themselves the US Cooperate Medias like CNN, and MSNBC, and CBS, and Facebook and Twitter, and the Cooperate Sports Leagues, and the Airlines, and the Cooperate Manufacturers, and the Cooperate Restaurants, saying that they are not the Government, and say that they have to Right like Industrialists of Nazi Germany, saying that they have the Right to censor us Jews and Samaritans, while jeopardizing the Public's Welfare for their own Political and Economic Gains, promoting their Toxic Poison Fraud Vaccines, and promoting their Antisemitic Democratic Evolutionist Schools and Colleges, that as US Government they censored out our Hebrew and Chaldee Scriptures saying that must have separation of Church and State, and they keep promoting their Antisemitic Democratic Doctrines, and to get us attacked and murdered like Nazi Germany, as the Cooperate Medias saying that we have no Medical or Religious Rights to refuse their Toxic Poison Fraud Flu and COVID Vaccines, that take block none from getting infected with any Virus like the real Vaccines for Mumps and Measles and Polio and Smallpox, and they lie claiming that their Toxic Poison Fraud Flu and COVID Vaccines are real Vaccines, saying that they have the Right to mandate upon us their Toxic Poison that unlike Moses and Daniel's diet, throw our blood and urine levels off repeatedly, disabling and or murdering us like Nazi Germans, because they say that we have no Medical or Religious Rights to refuse their Toxic Poison Vaccines and Drugs and Foods and Drinks

Them Deadly dangerous Psychotic Vaccinator Snake Oil salesmen Politicians from the house the thief's, and their paid Satan's Deadly dangerous Psychotic synagogue washed up Medias, and their Deadly dangerous Psychotic washed up Doctors and Dieticians, and their Deadly dangerous Psychotic washed up opposing Right and Left Wing Political Activists, are still making the violent overwhelming unstoppable Global Climate Changes worse and worse, by still using the British's, Margaret Thatcher's, Al Gore's, their allied BP's, British Petroleum's, flawed and false Greenhouse Gas caused Global Climate Change Sciences, to sell the Snake Oils, and to sell Crude Oil to make Plastics and Synthetics for their Toxic Poison burning, and blown down, and failing Windmill Generators and for their Toxic Poison burning, and blown down, and failing Solar Panel Farms, and for their Toxic Poison burning, and blown down, and failing Power and Water Grids, as that Toxic Space War age pollution is making the violent overwhelming unstoppable Global Climate Changes, bringing Dam Breaks and Flash Floods, and burning, and blown down, and failing Power and Water Grids, from Coast to Coast

All the Deadly dangerous Psychotic Joe Biden's and the Medias, multi Trillion Dollar Climate Control Infrastructure Rebuild, requires more mass amounts of Crude Oil Byproducts called Plastics and Synthetics, more than what caused the drastic unstoppable Climate Changes in the first place, because they are sided with Soviet Communists, destroying America and the fake Jew Zionist State, deliberately lying to the Public, just to stuff their own Pockets at the Public's expense

If you and or a Family Member to Aspirin or Tylenol or Ibuprofen, or Antibiotics, or Pain Killers, or any other Mediation and or any Vaccine, and or Food and or Drink, made from, and or containing Additives, made from Crude Oil, and you got anyone of the Medical Disorders that cause the leading causes of Death, sue the Oil Companies and Drug Manufactures and CDC and FDA, for the harm and death that caused by their Toxic Poison Drugs and Vaccines, and Toxic Poison Foods and Drinks, that Nature never intended for you to eat, or to have injected into you

As they spill more and more Crude Oil, destroying the Earth, to make all the Electric Cars and Golf Carts and Windmills and Solar Panels, come from Plastics, the Byproducts of refining Crude Oil, so that Joe Biden, and the Politicians, and the Medias, and the Climate Control Activists, are deliberately lying to the Public, and deliberately causing Global Climate Change, refining Crude Oil to make Toxic Synthetics and Plastics and Toxic Metal Alloys, as our Hebrew and Chaldee Scriptures did not use Crude Oil or Plastics or the Alloys, and they are causing the drastic unstoppable Global Climate Change with Crude Oil and its Products, as they Pollute the Earth, and the Waters, and the Oceans, changing the Oceans pH and Temperature with unnatural Chemical Reactions, so we demand that their Toxic Space War age Plastic Synthetic and Aluminum Food and Drink Containers, never be recycled for Food and Drink Containers, for our Hebrew and Chaldee Scriptures never use their Toxic Space War age Plastic Synthetics or their Toxic Aluminum for Foods and Drinks, and our Materials never caused Global Climate Change, and they have no recycle Containers for our non Toxic Metals, and Glass, and Pyrex Glass, and White Porcelain, and Pottery, and Leather, that our Hebrew and Chaldee Scriptures uses for Food and Drink Containers.

Modern Marvels: How We Use Oil Everyday (S15, E25) | Full Episode | History

https://youtu.be/oQnw2opVWVk

Here in North Dakota, with only 31 Unvaccinated Hospitalized out of 971 Unvaccinated Infected, and 130 Vaccinated with one shot Hospitalized, out of 3, 297 Vaccinated with one Shot, that Poisoned and Disabled them, and got them Infected, besides the ones the Fraud COVID Vaccine Shots Killed, the US Government and CDC and FDA, and Medias are deliberately lying to the Public, to mass murder their Religious and Political Rivals, to force upon us the Antisemitic Democratic Dictatorship, like Nazi Germans and the Soviet Communists did

4,268 New Infections, 3,279 Vaccinated New Infection, only 971 Unvaccinated with a New Infection, making it so that if you take the Shot, you are more likely to get infected, because the Toxic Poison Fraud COVID Vaccines poisoned your Immune System, as out of 4,268 New Cases, the Hospitalized is 161, minus the 130 Vaccinated Hospitalized, equals 31 Unvaccinated Hospitalized, and out of the 4,268 New Cases, 3,279 are the Poisoned Vaccinated, that were Infected, because they were Poisoned by the Deadly dangerous Psychotic Vaccinators, trying to open their Societies for their own Political Economic Gains at our expense, as the Deadly dangerous Psychotic Vaccinator Politicians, and Journalists, and Doctors, and Sports Athletes, and Hollywood and Bollywood fallen Stars, block from the Unvaccinated what we need to keep from being Infected by their deliberately Poisoned and Infected Vaccinated

My Brother had serious Adverse Reactions to the J&J/Janssen Vaccine, and my Mother had serious Adverse Reactions to Pfizer Vaccine, because the Antisemitic Hate Crime Criminals say that we have no Medical or Religious Rights to refuse their Mandated Vaccines

Along with many they call Jews, many of the Antisemitic Antichrist Democratic Right and Left Wing Soviet Communist Russians and Antisemitic Antichrist Democratic Right and Left Wing Soviet Communist fake Jew Zionist, were poisoned by the Toxic US FDA approved Toxic Additives in the Russian Sputnik V vaccine, and in the Pfizer Fraud COVID Vaccine and un the Moderna Fraud COVID Vaccine

The Soviet Communist lying claiming to be Jews are blocking forensic autopsies on the mass numbers of dead that they call Jews, dying from the Toxic Poison Fraud Vaccines, as the Antisemitic Democratic US and Zionist Medias, use their fraud Doctors, like Dr Jorge Rodriquez that needs to be jailed and tried for his and Medias Antisemitic Hate Crimes and Medical Malpractice, denying us Jews and Samaritan Medical and Religious Rights to refuse to take their Mandated Toxic Poison Fraud Vaccines, that block none from getting Viral Infections, and poisons them, and gets them infected, like their Toxic Poison Fraud Vaccines are doing here in North Dakota

Because of their deep and deepening War Debts, and Stolen Tax Slave monies, like in the US, like in Florida, the Zionist State Buildings are nearing Collapse on People that they call Jews, because the Antisemitic Hate Crime Criminals as mass murderers, they lie claiming to be Jews and Christians as Deadly dangerous Psychotic Vaccinator Snake Oil salesmen Politicians from the house the thief's, and their paid Satan's Deadly dangerous Psychotic synagogue washed up Medias, and their Deadly dangerous Psychotic washed up Doctors and Dieticians, and their Deadly dangerous Psychotic washed up opposing Right and Left Wing Political Activists

בית שמש: תקרה קרסה בבניין בעיר - דייריו פונו מהאזור

מפקד משמרת בכאות והצלה הורה על פינויו המיידי של הבניין בן ה-3 קומות, כאשר בהמשך מהנדס מהטעם העירייה שהוזעק לזירה אישר את ההחלטה. תושבים באזור הורחקו על ידי המשטרה - אין מפגעים

Beit Shemesh: A ceiling collapsed in a building in the city - its occupants were evacuated from the area

A fire and rescue watch commander ordered the immediate evacuation of the three-story building, with a city engineer who was called to the scene later approving the decision. Residents in the area were removed by the police - no hazards

https://tinyurl.com/h3rt22uz

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thistreasurehunter · 4 years

Text

Push and Slide

Summary: JJ helps Pope get that sweet, sweet relief.

Genre: Smut.

**FURTHER DETAILS AND WARNINGS UNDER THE CUT**

WARNING: Adult content (18+ only please). JJ gives Pope a blumpkin. So... kinky smut. Although - because it’s still me - I have written this in the most romantic/tasteful way possible. But if this doesn’t sound like your thing, please don’t read on.

A/N: All characters are aged 18+.

Word length: 1.5k

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the Outer Banks characters or settings.

*****************************************************

This, Pope though gloomily, was just downright uncomfortable. He shifted his feet on the tiles, raising up onto the balls of his feet to lift his knees, trying to find a better position. He took a deep breath and then strained again. Nothing.

He let his bare feet slap back down onto the bathroom floor, exhaling with a grimace. This was the third day in a row, Pope thought miserably. Three days of feeling heavy, bloated and frustrated. His sphincter clenched involuntarily and he could feel the stubborn, solid mass just inside the entrance to his rectum.

That’s it, he sighed wearily, next time we go grocery shopping I’m buying some bran flakes or something. I don’t care if JJ laughs at me and makes old man jokes, I clearly need more fibre in my diet. Besides, this situation is hardly ideal for either of us.

Last night, while the two of them had been fooling around in bed, JJ had licked the shell of his ear, slid his hand down between Pope’s legs and then asked quietly, in a low voice heavy with lust, “Pope, can I be on top tonight?”

Pope’s face had twisted in discomfort. He was painfully aware of his boated abdomen and his uncomfortable fullness.

“Umm,” he’d said awkwardly “can we do something else instead?” And, of course, JJ had just agreed straight away, without trying to change Pope’s mind. Like always. Because he was respectful of Pope, in a way that Pope hadn’t thought was possible before he met JJ. Until then, Pope hadn’t thought he was worthy of such respect.

But JJ so very rarely asked to top. Not with words, not like that. So, he must have really been in the mood, Pope thought. And Pope had turned him down. Because of this.

Pope screwed up his eyes at the memory. “Dammit,” he grunted in frustration, “come on!” He clenched his face and tried pushing and straining again.

And it was right at that moment that JJ walked in.

“JJ!” Pope yelped, his face turning bright red. “JJ, I’m… I’m just…” he spluttered self-consciously. “The bathroom’s… occupied,” he finished lamely.

JJ rolled his eyes and then smiled down at Pope, who was valiantly trying to look as composed as possible, while sitting on the toilet with his trousers around his ankles. “I can see that, Pope” he said lightly, “but I want to give you a blowjob.”

Pope spluttered again.

“Umm… okay,” he said after a moment. “Well, that sounds lovely. But can you give me a couple of minutes to… errr…” he gestured his current position “…finish up here first, please?”

“No need,” JJ said briskly.

He dropped to his knees in front of Pope, gave his firm thigh a reassuring pat, then took hold of Pope’s flaccid penis and started rubbing.

“JJ…” Pope said uneasily.

“Just relax,” JJ replied, gently pushing Pope to lean back again the raised lid. Then he nudged Pope’s legs further apart and leaned down and took Pope into his mouth.

Pope blinked, looking down at JJ incredulously.

“You really are something else, you know that?” He said fondly, running his fingers through JJ’s wild, silky hair. JJ just hummed in reply.

Pope leaned back and took a deep breath. JJ’s mouth felt amazing, as always. But this time, it also felt kind of weird. He was very aware of where they were, the porcelain bowl he was sitting over and what he’d been trying to do only a moment ago.

JJ worked Pope’s length with a skill borne of much practice, setting a decidedly slow and sweetly gratifying rhythm. Pope sighed again and then slowly started rocking his hips in gentle participation.

Suddenly, JJ’s head came up and he detached from Pope’s cock with a wet pop.

“No,” he said simply. The tiny frown lines that appeared between his eyebrows made him look almost comically disgruntled. “I told you to relax, Pope. Just sit back and take it.”

“Ummm… okay,” Pope said again, more than a little perplexed.

“Just completely relax,” JJ said earnestly. And with that, he lent forwards and took Pope back into his mouth.

Pope sighed and cleared his mind, letting the sensations overtake him. Okay, he though, I’m not entirely sure where this is all coming from, but he is right, this does feel nice.

Pope sat back and let JJ pleasure him with his mouth, consciously unclenching all the tightness he held in his muscles – his shoulders, his jaw, his thighs, his stomach. He felt loose… free… weightless.

Suddenly, Pope felt his sphincter relax and the swooping twist in his stomach that always preceded a bowel movement.

“Stop! Stop!” Pope cried urgently.

JJ popped his head up again.

“What?” JJ said, his chin shinning with saliva, looking up at Pope with his large, blue eyes.

Pope swallowed uncomfortably, his cheeks heating up. “I…” he started awkwardly. “I felt like… like I was going to… you know… go” he finished, mortified.

JJ rolled his eyes fondly. “Well, yeah, Pope,” he smiled from between Pope’s spread thighs, “that’s kind of the point.”

“What?” Pope said. Rather eloquently – he thought – considering the situation.

JJ shrugged and looked up at him affectionately.

“You’ve been pretty constipated recently, haven’t you?” he said.

“Umm, yeah, I guess” Pope reluctantly agreed.

“You definitely have,” JJ confirmed.

“How can you be so sure?” Pope asked, furrowing his brows slightly.

“Oh, please, Pope” JJ huffed. “We’ve been together so long, by this point I probably know your body better than I know my own.”

“Fair enough” Pope conceded.

“And,” JJ carried on, “it’s been making you feel crap.” Pope could only nod weakly. “Well,” JJ said with a smile, “I’m in the business of making Pope feel good and also making sure Pope doesn’t feel crap. So…” he gestured their current position.

“Really?” Pope asked, looking down at him with raised eyebrows. “Isn’t it just a bit… I dunno… icky?”

JJ actually laughed out loud at that. “After all the stuff we’ve done together, Pope?”

Pope sighed and closed his eyes in defeat.

“Okay,” he said slowly, looking back down at JJ. “But afterwards, if this ends up being gross, just remember you asked for it.”

“Don’t worry, Pope,” JJ grinned, giving Pope’s leg another reassuring squeeze. “I promise, from the look on my face afterwards, anyone would swear your shit smelled like roses.” Then he winked and took Pope back into his mouth.

Pope huffed a laugh and let JJ push him back into a reclined position. He breathed deeply and allowed himself to relax again. JJ brought his hand up and lightly rested in on Pope’s lower abdomen, gently rubbing in soothing circles. Pope couldn’t help but smile.

He closed his eyes and concentrated on the feeling of JJ’s mouth; on the pleasure radiating from the hot, wet slide of his lips. One area at a time, he consciously released the tension he held in his muscles: his face, his jaw, his shoulders, his stomach, his thighs. He breathed deeply. He felt weightless and floaty and calm and aroused and open and relaxed. And finally, there it was. He felt that familiar swooping sensation in his bowels, a build of pressure and then the delicious slide, as the solid mass slowly began moving down his passage and sliding out of his body.

Pope let out a long, loud moan of relief. It felt so good, he wasn’t even ashamed of the embarrassingly loud splash that followed a moment later.

Pope felt JJ stretch a smile around his cock before picking up the pace and bobbing his head faster. Still riding the high, and feeling gloriously light and empty, Pope absentmindedly threaded his fingers back into JJ’s hair and played with the silky strands until, finally, JJ tipped him over the edge and he came hard, pulsing thickly and releasing down JJ’s throat.

After a final, affectionate lick, JJ raised his head and wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. He was grinning from ear to ear, a smug expression plastered on his face.

Pope rolled his eyes as he looked down at him, but he also couldn’t help the flutter he felt in his heart at the sight of the incredible, wonderful, unbelievable man he was lucky enough to be sharing his life with.

“Okay, fine” Pope sighed in a mock begrudging tone. “You were right, that felt amazing.” Then he added sincerely, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” JJ grinned. “So,” he added after a beat, raising an eyebrow, a twinkle in his eyes. “How do you feel about returning the favor?”

#jjpope #mayward #jj maybank #pope heyward #fic

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hieromonkcharbel · 3 years

Text

Life of St. Philip Neri by Fr. Bacci

OF THE MIRACULOUS PALPITATION OF HIS HEART.

This mode of life Philip adhered to for a long time; and when he was twenty-nine years old God gave him, among other graces, a miraculous palpitation of the heart, and a no less wonderful fracture of his ribs, which happened as follows: One day a little before the feast of Whitsuntide, he was making his accustomed prayer to the holy Ghost, for whom he had such a devotion, that he daily poured out before him most fervent prayers, imploring His gifts and graces. When he was made priest, he always said at mass, unless the rubric forbid it, the prayer Deus cui omne cor patet. Now, while he was importunately demanding of the Holy Ghost His gifts, there appeared to the saint a ball of fire, which entered into his mouth and lodged in his breast; and therewith he was, all suddenly, surprised by such a flame of love, that he was unable to bear it, and threw himself on the ground, and, like one trying to cool himself, he bared his breast, to abate in some measure the flame which he felt. When he had remained so for some time, and was a little recovered, he rose up full of an unwonted joy, and immediately all his body began to shake with a vehement tremour; and putting his hand to his bosom, he felt by the side of his heart a tumour about as big as a man’s fist, but neither then nor over afterwards was it attended with the slightest pain.

Whence this swelling proceeded, and what it was, was manifested after his death; for when his body was opened, the two upper ribs were found broken, and thrust outward, and the two sides standing wide apart, never having reunited in all the fifty years which Philip lived after this miraculous event. It was at the same moment that the palpitation of his heart commenced, which lasted all his life, though he was of a good constitution, a very lively temperament, and without the least tendency to melancholy. This palpitation only came on when he was performing some spiritual action, such as praying, saying mass, communicating, giving absolution, talking on heavenly things, and the like. The trembling which it caused was so vehement, that it seemed as if his heart would break out from his breast, and his chair, his bed, and sometimes the whole room, were shaken. On one occasion in particular he was in St. Peter’s, kneeling on a large table, and he caused it to shake as if it had been of no weight at all; and sometimes when he was lying upon the bed with his clothes on, his body was lifted up into the air, through the vehemence of the palpitation. Whenever he pressed any of his spiritual children to his breast, they found the motion of his heart so great, that their heads bounded off from him, as if they had received a smart shock from something, while at other times the motion seemed like that of a hammer. Yet notwithstanding the shock, they always found, in being pressed to him, a wonderful consolation and spiritual contentment, and many found themselves in the very act delivered from temptations.

But while upon this matter, I must not omit to relate what is affirmed by Tiberio Ricciardelli, canon of St. Peter’s, who served the Saint out of devotion for four successive years. “While I was serving the father,” he says, “there came upon me a temptation to impurity, and after I had conversed with him on the subject, he said to me, ‘Tiberio, come here, close to my breast;’ and taking hold of me, he pressed me to his bosom, and I was not only freed at once from the present temptation, but it never returned afterwards; and besides this I felt such an increase of spiritual strength, that it seemed as if I could do nothing but pray.” Marcello Vitelleschi, canon of S. Mary Major, and also one of Philip’s

spiritual children, declared that he had repeatedly been freed from temptations, especially of the flesh, by the Saint’s pressing him to his bosom and very often, when Philip knew that he was suffering from such temptations, he used to take hold of his head and press it to him, without uttering a word and in no case was this done without immediate release from the temptation.

In his side Philip felt so great a heat, that it sometimes extended over his whole body, and for all his age, thinness, and spare diet, in the coldest nights of winter it was necessary to open the windows, to cool the bed, to fan him while in bed, and in various ways to moderate the great heat. He felt it so much in his throat, that in all his medicines something cooling was mixed to relieve him. Cardinal Crescenzio, one of his spiritual children, said that sometimes when he touched his hand, it burned as if the Saint was suffering from a raging fever; the same was also perceived by abbot Giacomo, the Cardinal’s brother, himself tenderly beloved by Philip. In winter he almost always had his clothes on and his girdle loose, and sometimes when they told hum to fasten it lest he should do himself some injury, he used to say he really could not because of the excessive heat which he felt. One day at Rome, when a great quantity of snow had fallen, he was walking in the streets with his cassock unbuttoned and when some of his penitents who were with him were hardly able to endure the cold, he said laughingly that it was a shame for young men to feel cold when old men did not. This heat, however, the Saint felt more particularly during prayer or other spiritual exercises, and application to divine things. In the time of Gregory XIII. when the order was given that all confessors should wear surplices in the confessional, the Saint went one day to the Pope with his waistcoat and cassock unbuttoned: his holiness marvelling very much, asked him the reason of it: “Why,” said Philip, “I really cannot bear to keep my waistcoat buttoned, and yet your holiness will have it that I shall wear a surplice besides.” “No, no,” replied the pope, ‘‘the order was not made for you; do as you please.”

This palpitation of the heart often affected his body in very different ways, and his various physicians used to administer remedies which he knew would not be of the slightest service. But he used to make game of them very playfully, and say, “I pray God that these men may be able to understand my infirmity,” not choosing openly to discover that his infirmity was not natural, but caused by the love of God. Hence it was that in the fervours of the palpitation he was wont to say, “I am wounded with love;” at other times, considering himself as it were imprisoned in this love, he broke out into those verses:

Vorrei saper da voi com’ ella è fatta

Questa rete d’ amor, che tanti ha preso.

“I would know from you how that net of love is made which has taken so many.” At other times when he could not stand upon his feet, he was obliged to throw himself upon his bed, and languish there, so that his own people were accustomed to say, that those words of the Spouse were verified in him: Fulcite me floribus, stipate me malis, quia amore langueo. When he was surprised by these affections, he used to quote the case of a Franciscan of Ara Celi, named Brother Antony, a man of most holy life, who though he did not macerate his body by any great austerities, was always crying out, Amore laugueo, amore langueo; and languishing in this way, through love of God, he wasted slowly away till he died. But on the other hand the Saint, to hide the real cause, pretended that all this was bodily infirmity, or a custom which he had had from his youth. He almost always kept his handkerchief in his breast on the side of his heart, in order that no one might perceive the tumour. He did not, however, deny, when speaking once to Francesco Zazzera, that for the most part his infirmities proceeded from this palpitation of his heart.

The whole appears still more wonderful from the fact, that the motion of the palpitation was in his case perfectly voluntary. He mentioned this to Cardinal Frederick Borromeo, his most intimate and devoted friend, telling him that it was in his power to stop the motion by a simple act of the will. But in prayer he did not apply himself to do this, because of the distraction; and that the palpitation was so far from being painful, that it created a feeling of lightness and joyousness. This, however, did not always happen, nor did it exactly observe any general rules. Many physicians, who attended him in his illnesses, considered this palpitation as miraculous and supernatural. This was the opinion of Alfonso Capanio, Domenico Saraceni, and others. Neither was this opinion without reason; for, first of all, the Saint had no sensation of pain with the palpitation, but rather the contrary; and besides that, he only experienced it when he raised his mind to God, for it was greatest when he was in contemplation, and grew less in proportion as he drew his thoughts from prayer. In proof of this Andrea Cesalpino, Antonio Porto, Ridolfo Silvestri, Bernardino Castellani, and Angelo da Bagnarea, have written particular treatises upon it; and all agree that God had wrought in him that fracture of the ribs, so that the heart might not be injured in these violent beatings, and the neighbouring parts be the more easily dilated, and the heart kept sufficiently cool.

When Philip had received this great and remarkable gift from God, he frequented the Seven Churches with still more ardour. There he was often, surprised in his devotion with such affections, that he was unable to support himself. One day in particular, when he could not stand on his feet, he threw himself on the ground, and feeling himself actually dying through the liveliness and impetuosity of spirit, he cried out vehemently, “I cannot bear so much, my God, I cannot bear so much, Lord! for see, I am dying of it.” From that hour God gradually mitigated that intense sensible devotion, in order that his body might not become too much weakened by it. It was on this account, that in his latter years he used to say, “I was more spiritual when I was young, than I am now.” But although Philip received from the Lord such an affluence of heavenly sweetnesses, he nevertheless always admonished spiritual persons, that they should be as ready to suffer dryness in devotion as long as God pleased to leave them in it, and without complaint, as they were disposed to enjoy the relish of divine things.

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dindjarindiaries · 4 years

Text

Thunder - Chapter 2: Cold Front

gif via @hvitserkk

summary: Santiago sits down with Frankie and Luciana to set some boundaries—ones they can’t promise they’ll stick to.

warnings: minor angst, reflections on trauma

rating: R

word count: 4.85k

masterlist

chapter 2: cold front

Frankie doesn’t get to be alone with Santiago often. So, when his closest friend asks him to lunch at their favorite dive just down the road, he doesn’t hesitate to get his shit together and hop into Santiago’s forest green Jeep. Frankie doesn’t ask why—he never will. He treasures these moments he gets to have with the guy who feels like his twin brother. He doesn’t need to question the motive.

Santiago shivers as the air whips into the Jeep through the crack in Frankie’s window. “Jesus, why is it so cold today?” he mutters, lifting the button to seal the window shut.

“It’s from the storm,” Frankie explains.

“The storm? There was a storm?” Santiago gives Frankie a confused look, and when Frankie nods, he sighs heavily and runs a free hand over the side of his head. “Damn, I really did fuck myself up last night.”

Frankie laughs. “What else is new?”

“Hey,” Santiago starts to defend himself, laughing a bit as he pulls into the parking lot that’s in desperate need of paving. “At least I’m not as bad as Benny.”

“You’re getting close,” Frankie teases, flashing him an amused smile before he hops out of the Jeep. Santiago punches his shoulder when they start walking inside the dive, heading over to the booth by the window where they always go. Typically, they’re with the group, so the booth feels bigger than usual as they take their seats. They don’t have to look through the menu before the waitress arrives, and Marlena knows exactly what they’re getting. She’s only surprised when Santiago requests a water instead of his usual diet coke.

“Rough night?” Marlena guesses, tucking her pen back behind her ear as she raises an eyebrow at Santiago.

“Yeah, you could say that,” Santiago chuckles.

Frankie laughs to himself, looking back to Santiago once Marlena puts their orders in. “Damn, Pope, even Marlena noticed.”

“Fuck off, Fish,” Santiago retorts, running his hands over his face before folding them on top of the table. “I didn’t think I looked that bad.”

“You don’t look bad, Pope. You’re handsome as hell.” Santiago laughs at that. “But you also do a shitty job at hiding your hangovers. Hell, I’m impressed you’re even able to handle being here right now.”

“It’s not as bad as usual. I’m actually pretty hungry right now.”

Frankie lifts an impressed brow. “Good for you. You’re getting better at actually being an adult.”

Santiago shakes his head and scoffs. “You’d know, wouldn’t you? You’re always out of the party early—and sober.”

Frankie shrugs, thanking Marlena as she drops off their drinks before disappearing back inside the kitchen. He pushes aside the straw and sips from his plastic Coca Cola cup of water. “I’ve never been one for parties, Pope. You know that.”

“Oh, trust me, I know.” Santiago snickers as he also sips delicately from the water, his nose wrinkling as he tastes it. “Damn, I forgot how flavorless water is.”

“It’s water, you dipshit. It’s not supposed to have flavor.”

“That’s why I drink diet coke.”

Frankie laughs, tilting his hat on his head as he shakes his head at his friend. “This is your step into adulthood, brother. You’re growing up in front my very eyes.”

“Franksters, don’t get cheesy on me right now.” Santiago reaches across the table to lightly punch Frankie’s shoulder again.

Frankie tenses at the nickname. “Oh God, please never call me that again.”

“Should I tell Benny to stop, then?”

“He won’t, no matter how many times you ask him.”

Santiago laughs. “You’re right, Fish.” He pauses, his gaze focusing up to the ceiling as he focuses on his words. “Franksters, Popey, Luci-Goosey… damn, the guy’s clever.”

“Don’t forget Kill Will and Tom-Tom.”

Santiago looks back at Frankie and tilts his head curiously. “Does he actually ever use those names, still?”

“Usually when he’s drunk.” Frankie lets out a curt chuckle and takes another sip of his water. “Like last night, he called Luci and I by our nicknames.”

“Oh, I see. So, it’s usually when I’m shitfaced, too.”

“For sure.” Frankie smiles in amusement. “When are you not shitfaced around Benny?”

“Fish, don’t fuckin’ play with me like we don’t live in the same household.” Santiago and Frankie both laugh as he says the words. “I’m serious, you fucker.”

“Language, Santiago!” Marlena chastises him as she walks by, hitting the side of Santiago’s head with a straw. He laughs harder, shaking his head as he looks back to Frankie.

When Santiago lets out a deep breath, Frankie sees his expression change—and it causes a pit to start forming in his stomach. He’s had a few serious conversations with Santiago before, mostly talking about the struggles of his past, and he can sense that another one’s about to come on. Frankie’s not sure why—which makes it even more nerve-wracking. “Listen, Frankie.” Santiago sighs the words, and Frankie furrows his brow at the use of his actual name. Santiago takes a sip of his water and fixates his gaze fully on his brother. “I, uh… I just wanted to bring something up with you.”

Frankie nods. “Anything, brother.”

One of the corners of Santiago’s mouth lifts upon hearing the endearment, but he continues as serious as before. “I know that you and my sister are close—basically just as close as we are.” Frankie offers another nod to confirm his words. “And I also know that you’ve been getting… well, closer. Which isn’t a problem, don’t get me wrong. But I feel like I should put some boundaries—.”

“Santiago, Luci and I are not like that,” Frankie cuts off his friend with a nervous chuckle. He even lifts his hands in surrender to further assure him. “We’re—it’s just friendship.”

“I know, I know.” Santiago gestures for Frankie to drop his hands. “I just—,” Santiago pauses as Marlena brings their plates, and the two brothers thank her before he goes on, “—I need to make sure I’m clear on this.”

“Of course. Say what you need to.” Frankie tries not to let his voice waver when he speaks, instead taking a bite of his burger to avoid talking more. He won’t let his thoughts betray him.

“Frankie, you know how close Luci and I are,” Santiago begins, unable to touch his food as he speaks. Instead, his hands remain folded on the tabletop. Frankie continues to eat to get rid of his sudden anxiety. “She’s my little sister—only by a few minutes, but still. And you also know how close you and I are. You’re the brother I never had. I mean, the other guys are my brothers too, but—you know.”

“I know,” Frankie assures him through a mouthful of fries.

“And having you both so close to me means that, obviously, my life wouldn’t be the same without you. If you ever were to, y’know, be together or something… that could drive a wedge between us.” Santiago pauses to collect his thoughts more, and Frankie tries to force his food down his throat despite the sudden hole that’s made itself known in his stomach. “Because relationships are fuckin’ hard. Things happen. It’s not easy. And if anything bad were to happen, and I lost one of you—or both of you—I don’t know what the fuck I’d do, Frankie.”

“I understand.” Frankie takes another bite of his burger—almost unable to swallow it around the lump in his throat.

“I just can’t have that, brother. I mean, I know you said you’re not like that, but please remember that if anything changes.”

Frankie fully studies the panic in Santiago’s eyes at the idea of losing his closest friend or his twin sister, and he feels a small pain in his chest as he nods at him. “You have my word, Santiago.” He reaches his hand across the table for a handshake, and Santiago returns it with a growing smile.

“I knew I could count on you, Franksters.” The darkness flees from Santiago’s gaze as it instead fills with amusement.

Frankie frowns and squeezes Santiago’s fingers in a deadly grip. “Don’t think that just because we’re being soft right now, I won’t fuckin’ kill you, Pope.”

As Santiago exclaims an ow!, Marlena walks by, slapping Frankie on the head with a straw as she says, “Language!” The brothers laugh, and Frankie releases Santiago’s hand to let them both keep eating. The conversation easily picks up on a lighter topic from there, and Frankie’s thoughts don’t even go back to their darker places until they get back to the house. Frankie decides to take a walk to clear his mind, and he sets off while Santiago heads inside the house.

Luciana’s watching a re-run of Magnum P.I. when Santiago comes in, and she turns to face him with a smile. It was a show they’d grown up watching together with their parents, and she knows her brother will be thrilled to that it’s on now. Before she can point it out to him, she watches as he raises his brow at her.

“Are the boys here?” Santiago asks, stopping at his place behind the kitchen island as he rests both hands on the hard surface.

Luciana shakes her head. “I think they said they were going out to lunch,” she explains. “Since, y’know, you and Frankie went alone.” She then furrows her brow, tilting her head at her brother. “Speaking of which, where is Frankie?”

“He’s out walking,” Santiago answers. Luciana’s immediately filled with concern, knowing that Frankie must not be in a good place mentally if he’s walking alone. It’s one of the many things she’s picked up about him—and now she feels motivated to go join him and get him to talk about whatever’s going on. She even starts to stand up from the couch, but when Santiago comes over with two cans of diet coke—one for each of them—she makes herself sit back down. “Is it alright if I talk to you real quick?”

“Of course, Santi,” Luciana remarks, trying to ignore the concern she feels for Frankie as she instead focuses on the growing darkness in her brother’s eyes. She takes the can he’s offering to her, popping it open and taking a sip as she waits for him to speak.

“Luci, you know I want to support you in everything you do,” Santiago begins, his thumb playing with the tab of the can as his gaze remains fixated on it. “You also know that I want what’s best for you—right?”

“Yeah, Santi, I know,” Luciana confirms. She feels a weight on her chest from her growing worry. She has no idea where this conversation could go.

“Well… I’ve just been noticing, y’know, how close you and Frankie have become.” Santiago pauses to pop his can open, drawing a long sip before finally looking his sister in the eye. “I think that’s great—because he’s like my brother. But I need to make sure that’s how it stays for you.”

Luciana furrows her brow, tapping her index finger against the can. “What do you mean?”

“I mean…” Santiago sighs, his gaze drifting to the ceiling and then looking back at Luciana, “… I can’t see you two being together.”

Luciana’s brow shoots up. “Santi, it’s not like—.”

“I know,” Santiago assures her, holding his hand out to emphasize his point. “I just have to make sure you know that I don’t think it would be the best idea for that to ever happen. Because the three of us, we’re all so close, and if something should happen between you—and it drives us apart—it’d break not only me, but all of us.” Santiago shakes his head at the thought of it. “I can’t bear seeing that happen.”

“I won’t let anything drive us apart, brother.” Luciana reaches one hand out to take her brother’s, giving it a squeeze as she smiles at him. “Promise.”

Santiago returns her smile, but it quickly fades as he goes on. “I want to see you happy, little sis, don’t get me wrong. And I don’t think you’d both even get to that point past friendship. But love is risky, and I can’t risk losing the two most important people in my life.”

Luciana nods, reaching forward to give her brother an affectionate embrace. “I understand, Santi.” When she pulls away, she gives his cheek a quick kiss, satisfied to see the darkness leaving his eyes as his lips curl back up into a smile. “I won’t let anything drive us apart. Alright?”

“Thank you, little sis.” Santiago takes a swig of his diet coke, finally turning to the TV and noticing Magnum P.I. playing. His eyes widen as he looks at Luciana excitedly. “It’s Magnum!”

“Of course it is!” Luciana exclaims with a laugh, resting her head on her brother’s shoulder as they continue to watch together. She tucks away her secret thoughts on Santiago’s words for the moment, simply choosing to spend some quality time with him before she lets herself resent his speech. For a moment, she pretends that they’re kids again, and she doesn’t have to think about more complex things as she puts herself into the world of Magnum P.I. with her brother.

When the current episode finishes, Santiago heaves a sigh, rising from the couch and heading back over to the counter. He reaches for his keys. “I hate to run out again, but I’ve got a meeting for some group project.” He raises his brow at her. “Will you be okay on your own again?”

“Please, Santi, I’m used to it,” Luciana scoffs, waving him off. “You five are always leaving me for something.”

Santiago laughs, walking back over to give his sister a kiss on her head. “Thanks for hearing me out, little sis.”

Luciana doesn’t respond, instead pasting on a smile as he heads towards the door. As soon as he’s outside, Luciana rolls her eyes, setting her diet coke onto the coffee table as she crosses her arms. “Wants what’s best for me,” she mutters. “It’ll drive us apart… bullshit. Bullshit.”

Luciana loves her brother more than anything—but she’s also not one to be told what to do with her life. She has intense self-awareness, and if she feels that something’s good for her, she’ll take it. She doesn’t need the advice of other people who think they know her so well. She’s a woman who’s used to living in a man’s world, and that’s something she knows her brother can’t understand. If Luciana should want to pursue something with Frankie, she will.

If.

Luciana picks her diet coke back up and takes a swig of it. There’s no guarantees. No promises. If she stretches the truth a bit, Luciana could even say that she hasn’t thought of a future with Frankie beyond friendship. She’s just trying to go through the flow of life, letting it take her wherever she belongs. It’s much easier than scrutinizing every detail.

Something she knows both Frankie and Santiago do—a lot.

Thinking about Frankie draws her thoughts back to him, and almost immediately after, she sees him walking through the door. She smiles when he comes into sight, his usual hat hiding most of his curls as a few peek out from under it. His dark eyes wrinkle up a bit as he returns her smile. Luciana loves it when his eyes do that. It means he’s truly happy. And when they light up with such a gentle sparkle, that glimmer of light with its contagious happiness, they look so reminiscent of a summer night’s sky. It’s almost as if he has the entire galaxy in—.

“Hey, Luce,” Frankie’s voice cuts off her thoughts, bringing Luciana back to the present. “What’ve you been up to?”

Luciana gestures to the TV with her diet coke can. “Magnum.” Frankie chuckles. “And you?”

Frankie shrugs. “Walkin’.”

Luciana frowns. “You okay?”

Frankie nods, leaning his back against the counter as he continues to look her way. “Yeah, I’m alright. Just had to clear my mind.”

“Is there any way I can help with that?”

“No, no, don’t worry about it.” Frankie shakes his head as he speaks, as if to reassure her.

“Let me guess… it had something to do with my brother.” Frankie’s eyes widen at that, and suddenly Luciana understands exactly what’s happening. “He talked with you about it too, didn’t he?”

“About…?” Frankie trails off, waiting for Luciana to fill in the blank.

“Us.” Luciana raises her brow, and Frankie hesitates before offering a nod. She laughs, shaking her head. “Of course he did. He’s crazy, Frankie.” Luciana raises an eyebrow at him. “Was it as awkward for you guys as it was for us?”

“It wasn’t awkward,” Frankie insists, his gaze unable to meet Luciana’s as he looks around the room. “It was more, like…”

“… unnecessary?” Luciana finishes once again, and Frankie gives her another nod. “Yeah, that’s what I thought, too.”

Frankie is suddenly wondering what other thoughts Luciana’s sharing with him. Was she also seized by panic throughout the talk? Did she fear that she’d have to put a stop to the feelings she has no control over? The ones that have been growing for some time, but haven’t come into fruition yet? Or is she satisfied by the whole thing, and in agreeance with her brother on the matter? This is why Frankie doesn’t get his hopes up. He’ll keep reminding himself of that.

“You know what I could really use after that bullshit?” Luciana pulls Frankie out of his thoughts, and his wandering gaze finally falls back on her. He watches as she stands up from the couch and turns off the TV, heading over to the kitchen and emptying the rest of her diet coke down her throat. Frankie narrows his eyes as he studies her—as if he doesn’t already know exactly what she’s thinking.

“A milkshake,” Frankie finally answers, seeing Luciana’s eyes widen as she places her can in their designated place for recyclables.

“Fuck yes, Frankie!” Luciana exclaims. “I knew I could count on you!”

Frankie feels his chest warm up, especially as Luciana’s dark eyes begin to sparkle at him. Don’t get your hopes up. “Always, Luci. Remember who you’re talkin’ to.” Frankie sends Luciana an obnoxious wink, and she rolls her eyes before reaching for her wallet. Frankie stops her, sliding the wallet farther away on the countertop so that it’s out of her reach. Luciana lifts an eyebrow at him. “Don’t be ridiculous, Luce. It’s my treat.”

“Frankie, don’t do this to me,” Luciana sighs, shaking her head as she lunges for it again. Frankie slides it further away. “You asshole! You always pay for everything. And I’m not making you pay for something that was my idea.”

“Technically, it was my idea.” Frankie smirks as Luciana huffs in defeat, finally standing up straight again and joining him at his side. “Thank you for cooperating.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Luciana grumbles, trying to hide her smile as they walk out of the door. She turns around to lock the door with her keys. “But I’m buying our next pizza.”

“That’s what you say now,” Frankie insists. “But you just wait.”

“Frankie, I swear to fuckin’ Christ, if you buy another goddamn pizza for the both of us…” Luciana trails off, laughing as they start to head down the sidewalk. Their destination is the dive Frankie was just at—but of course he doesn’t mind going back with Luciana. She loves their milkshakes, and so does he. She’ll order the strawberry flavor with graham cracker pieces crumbled inside of it, and he’ll get plain chocolate. That’s how it always is. And Frankie wouldn’t have it any other way.

“So, did Santiago really make it an awkward talk for you?” Frankie doesn’t look over at Luciana as he asks the question.

“Eh, no, it wasn’t too bad.” Luciana sighs, crossing her arms and dropping her gaze to her moving feet. She has to walk almost double-time to keep up with Frankie’s longer legs. “It was just… frustrating. For me, at least. Because he’ll say I’m his ‘little sis’ and tell me he wants me to be happy and all of that sappy shit, but then he’ll try to control and dictate my life.” Luciana finally looks over at Frankie, and with every glance he steals, he can see her dark eyes full of determination—a desire to break free of whatever restraint’s being put on her. “I know he means well, but when you boil it down, he’s saying it because he’s selfish and he’s jealous. He doesn’t want us getting closer to each other than we are to him.”

Frankie nods slowly, easily seeing Luciana’s point. The way Santiago had voiced his thoughts to him makes it clear that he’s afraid. What Luciana’s saying makes the root of that fear even more obvious. “Yeah, that makes sense. You have every right to feel that way.” Frankie pauses, his gaze drifting up to the sky as he lets out a soft breath. “I wouldn’t want someone trying to control my life, either.”

“But don’t you see, Frankie? He’s trying to control your life, too.” Frankie looks over at Luciana, seeing her dark eyes widened at him. “He’s trying to tell you how to feel. He wants to control your feelings. And that’s not healthy for anyone, Frankie.” Luciana stops for a moment, her gaze filling with sympathy before she goes on. “Especially for you.”

Frankie’s gaze falls to his boots as soon as she says the words. “I’m used to it.” His voice is strained, stiff even, and he hopes Luciana won’t be able to tell. But he knows she will. She always does.

It’s when Frankie feels the gentle touch on his arm that his gaze snaps back to hers, and he nearly drowns himself in the soft way her dark eyes are studying him. “You don’t have to be.” She gives him a small smile, as if a larger one would make him uneasy. “I know your mind and heart are guarded, Frankie—and that makes sense, because of everything you’ve gone through. But you’re still free to feel what you feel. You don’t have to shut everything out. Not when you have people like us—people like me. You know us well, and we know you. You’re safe with us.”

Frankie’s heart softens at Luciana’s small speech, and he swallows hard to keep himself from saying something he’ll regret. Instead, he calculates his response, studying her gaze further to make sure he’s reading it right. “I know. Thank you.” Frankie looks back to the sidewalk ahead of them, seeing the dive come into close view. “I just… it’s not easy. To do that. Y’know?”

“I understand, Frankie.” Luciana’s gaze practically burns through Frankie as he continues looking ahead. But he knows he can’t share her gaze right now; it’ll reveal too much. It’s too much of a risk. “When you’ve lost people you love, it can be hard to open yourself back up. Because you’re afraid you’ll lose more people.”

“Exactly.” Frankie hates how his voice is strained again.

“But you won’t lose me—any of us.” Luciana reaches out her pinky for Frankie to take with his, and he watches it hang in the air for a moment. “I promise.”

Frankie tries to bite back a smile, looping his pinky with hers in a seal of promise. They chuckle softly as they bring their hands back to their sides, soon coming upon the dive. “Damn, at this rate, we’re gonna have a cavity from all of today’s sweetness.”

Luciana snorts and shakes her head. “That was such a dad joke.”

Frankie lifts his brow and looks over at her. “Have you not said that I’m the dad friend? Doesn’t it make sense? I need to stick to my brand, here.”

“Well, you’re doing a fantastic job.” Frankie tries to playfully punch her shoulder, but Luciana dodges it just in time, laughing as they stumble into the dive. Luciana leads the way in, and rather than taking the same familiar booth, she heads for one in the corner. Frankie isn’t fazed by this; it’s what they always do when they’re alone here. It’s just… different than being with the group. They can’t sit where the group always does. It puts them on that same level. And for reasons they both can’t acknowledge, they refuse to be placed on that same level with each other.

Marlena soon comes over, and she looks curiously at Frankie. “You’re back, again?” she teases, placing her hands on her hips for emphasis. “You just couldn’t annoy me enough today, huh?”

“Oh, c’mon, Marlena,” Frankie demurs, narrowing his eyes at her jokingly. “I’m not the annoying one. It’s always Santiago.”

“Yeah, but look,” Marlena observes, gesturing with her pen over to Luciana. “You brought another García with you.”

Luciana gapes dramatically at the waitress. “Marlena!” she exclaims with fake surprise, laughing a bit. “You have to think more highly of me.”

“Of course, dear,” Marlena assures her, giving her shoulder a gentle pat. “Now, let me guess: strawberry with graham crackers for you—,” she gestures with her pen over to Luciana again, “—and chocolate for you.” She moves her pen to Frankie’s direction.

“What else is new around here,” Luciana retorts, causing Marlena to chuckle as she writes the orders down.

“Sadly, nothin’,” Marlena remarks, throwing her a wink before she walks away. Frankie and Luciana share a confused look—although deep down, Frankie knows exactly what she’s referring to. Marlena’s never been shy about observing the close relationship between the two of them. She’s waiting for something to happen.

Frankie and Luciana get their milkshakes in no time, and they make their usual lighthearted conversation as they reflect on the recent household activity. Benny hasn’t been home for a while, and the house is starting to get used to it. They’re predicting what’ll happen the minute the group’s ultimate firecracker steps back in. Frankie declares a cage fight between Benny and Will for who gets to use their shower first. Luciana insists upon a party where Benny gets absolutely wasted, and everyone else pretends to be—but is actually completely sober. By the time they finish off their milkshakes, they’ve agreed upon both possibilities, plus one where the guys manage to get a fully asleep Benny and his mattress onto the roof for the night.

By the time they’re walking back to the house, the sun has surpassed its peak warmth, and the cold effects of the previous night’s storm are starting to make themselves more known. Frankie’s suddenly aware of the green jacket on his shoulders, as compared to the simple t-shirt Luciana’s dressed in. She won’t admit it, but he knows she’s cold. Her goosebumps couldn’t have lasted that long from the milkshake she’d indulged in—and gotten brain freeze from more than once.

Frankie doesn’t say a word to interrupt Luciana’s current speech on why Frankie should at least try the strawberry milkshake concoction as he shrugs his jacket off his shoulders. He’s left in his grey t-shirt as he hands the jacket over to Luciana, which ultimately causes her to stop speaking. Luciana’s brow raises at him.

“Take it,” Frankie instructs softly. “I’m not that cold.”

“Frankie, I—,” Luciana’s about to try to argue.

“Please, Luce, don’t fight me on this one. I can see your goosebumps.”

Luciana’s dark gaze softens, and Frankie watches her cheeks flush as she takes the jacket from his hands. She shrugs it on, and Frankie has to try to keep his chest from warming up at the way it nearly devours her figure. It’s an impossible task. He can already feel the warmth spreading from his chest to the rest of his body, making him tingle like a teenager who’s just starting to fall in love.

Fuck.

“Are you sure you’re not cold, now?” Luciana questions, pulling Frankie out of his thoughts as she gestures to his exposed arms.

“Luce, please,” Frankie scoffs. “I’m practically hot-blooded.”

Luciana’s eyes widen. “Flyboy, was that a Foreigner reference?”

Frankie shrugs with a knowing smile. “Maybe.”

Luciana shakes her head, returning his smile as she looks up at him. “And I thought you couldn’t know me any better.”

Frankie tries to keep his smile from growing even more at her words. Instead, he listens as she softly begins to hum and recite some of the lyrics of “Hot Blooded,” wondering what it’d be like if he got to experience this much more often. Frankie starts to wonder if he’ll be able to stay true to the word he’d given Santiago. He’s loyal, but any person would find it difficult to resist such charm, wit, beauty, loveliness, grace—.

Oh shit.

Frankie better not be falling hard before he even gets his ass into the air.

next part: chapter 3: humidity

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#THEM #i'm glad i took my time with this one because #i'm much more happy with it now #frankie morales #francisco morales #catfish morales #triple frontier #frankie morales fic #catfish morales fic #triple frontier fic #thunder fic #dindjarindiaries

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christians-911-com · 4 years

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Fasting According To Jesus - Matthew 6:16-18

In today’s Bible Study, we continue The Sermon on the Mount, and we are going to study the passage from Matthew 6:16-18 - Fasting According To Jesus. This passage is the third illustration given by our Lord of how we should conduct ourselves in this matter of personal righteousness.

Thus, follow the pattern that the Lord Jesus has set in Matthew 6, we can divide Christian lives into three main sections. First is the aspect of our lives in which we do good to other - almsgiving. Second is the question of our intimate personal relationship with God - prayer. And the third is the one we are about to look at as we consider the Gospel according to Matthew chapter 6 verses 16 through 18 - fasting 8.

Additionally, from the very beginning of the same chapter, Jesus warns His disciples that they should not live their religious lives as the hypocrites do. Moreover, our Lord explains how His followers ought to act. Thus, He reveals the only pieties that are true and acceptable to the Father.

So, here is the content of today's Bible study. First, we will answer the question of what is fasting according to secularism. Then we will consider the wrong ways of fasting. After that, we will look at some examples of fasting in the Bible. Lastly, we will conclude this study by learning what is fasting according to Jesus.

The Sermon on the Mount series:

I would love to glorify our Lord God, who blesses me with the knowledge, understanding, time, strength, and means to learn His Word and write the Bible studies. I pray that God's Word will reach your heart and many other hearts that seek to know the Lord Jesus Christ personally through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Also, you may be interested in my previous studies on The Sermon on the Mount:

The Beatitudes – Jesus’ guidelines for Believers

The Similitudes of Beatitudes

Jesus Christ Fulfills the Law

Angry Enough to Murder

Lustful Mind is Corrupted Heart

Divorce – Matthew 5:31-32

Vows, Oaths And Foreswearing – Matthew 5:33-37

Vengeance And Love – Matthew 5:38-48

Giving of Alms – Matthew 6:1-4

The Lord’s Prayer – Matthew 6:5-8 – Part 1

The Lord’s Prayer – Matthew 6:9-13 – Part 2

What is Fasting according to Secularism?

Before elaborating on the question about fasting in the secular world, I decided to 'google' what secularism is and what fasting is according to secularism. Remarkably, the majority of the search results for secularism gave me a simple definition. Secularism is a doctrine that seeks the separation of religion and government. However, this definition is a lie and deception. And here is why.

During my research, I came across the article on the National Secular Society. Further in the article, it states that "the Queen is both head of state and Supreme Governor of the Church of England". It is obvious to me that such a statement is not just hypocritical but even blasphemous, is not it? Also, it reminds me about another "Supreme Governor of the Church" - Vicarius Filii Dei - the Pope himself in all his glory. The one who dares to pervert the Word of God. Further, he took on himself alone all the religious powers. Moreover, he has tremendous influence in the political world.

Fasting for the sake of one who is fasting

The title of this section describes the definition of fasting according to the secular world. Although, secularism recognizes that fasting has some positive benefits on one's mind (spirit). However, their main focus is the effects on the body. Here are some titles of the article that speak for themselves. First, From Religion to Secularism: the Benefits of Fasting. Second, I went on a non-religious fast – and so should you. Third, The monk's guide to fasting. And the last one, The Diet From God.

The first two we can identify as the secular ones. Hence, they should have no importance for God-worshipping believers. But the last two authors wrote in the light of secularism. Thus they are deceptive, even though they use the Bible to "prove" their point. Ultimately, all of the above has one common thing about fasting - the benefits for one's flesh and the one who is fasting.

The Wrong ways of Fasting

The influence of secularism in Christianity brings us to the next section - the wrong ways of fasting. And I am glad that you asked, what is wrong with fasting for the sake of the body and the one who is fasting? Nothing. It is not Biblical, and I would not call it fasting but rather a food diet or abstinence. Here is my point, God created your body, and your duty is to take care of it. Ultimately, it is not for the Lord - it is for you.

Evidently, there is always the wrong way to do something. And fasting is not an exclusion of the rule. According to D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones 8, there are at least three wrong ways of fasting. And one of them logically emerges from the question that you have already asked above.

1. Fasting for the sake of discipline

Here is the first wrong way to fast. As I mentioned earlier, the influence of secularism has distorted the true Biblical meaning of fasting. In the same way, it distorted the moral values of humanity. Although, some people might say that fasting on a certain day of the week or a certain period of the year is good in terms of discipline. We should never consider fasting as part of our discipline.

Therefore, it is wrong to reduce fasting simply to be a part of the discipline process. Rather, it is something that we must keep perpetually. We must always keep our bodies fit; we must always eat healthily and promote a healthy and godly lifestyle. But fasting is your intimate relationship with God, it is holy. Thus, it puts it into a totally different category 8.

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service (Romans 12:1).

2. Fasting for the sake of fasting

Another wrong way to fast that many Christians are doing, including me in the past. As a new believer, especially with a Ukrainian Orthodox background, I was fasting for the sake of fasting. Martyn Lloyd-Jones calls it mechanical fasting. This kind of religious practice makes fasting an end in itself. Here is the logic: "Now, because I have become a Christian, I have to do this or that because it is a part of the Christian religion." That is the wrong motive, and if that is your case, you might as well not fast at all.

A routine is a form of false conduct found in many areas of the Christian life. Many believers simply make up a program for the week to fill their spare time with religious rituals. Thus, it makes such a relationship with God similar to that of a robot with its creator. Moreover, fasting is not the only rite that falls in that category. Christians do mechanical prayer and mechanical Bible reading. Even Sunday service became a part of their weekly routine. And now my question is: if you are a true believer, can you call such conduct worship? Can you call it holy?

And the four beasts had each of them six wings about him; and they were full of eyes within: and they rest not day and night, saying, Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, which was, and is, and is to come (Revelation 4:8).

3. Fasting for an immediate result

The last but not the least wrong way to fast is for the sake of controlling your blessings. And I was guilty of that one too. As for me, this is more dangerous and fraught with God's punishment. There are some people to whom God is like a parent that we can bargain with. For instance, "Hey, dad, I will wash the car if you let me borrow it on Friday." Or another one, "Mom, I will do the laundry if you let me sleepover at my friend's place." Sound familiar, right?

But, you might hear people say that they gathered on overnight prayer meetings or fasted for a certain number of days, and the revival broke through. Sure, that happens. Praise the Lord! But what if not? Then they will say, "well, you did not pray/fast enough." Or this one, "you have lack of faith." However, I would point them to 2 Corinthians 12:8-9.

Paul's prayers and spiritual gifts brought physical healings to many people, yet he could not heal himself. Definitely, it pleases God to answer prayer, but it must always depend on His will and purpose for us 1. Thus, fasting in order to manipulate God is a direct insult to the authority and sovereignty of the Almighty.

Nevertheless, miracles do happen! And the more we learn how to thank God rather than complain, the more we see them happening all around us. That is because God's grace is sufficient for you!

Examples of Fasting in the Bible

After considering the wrong ways of fasting, it is a good idea to look at examples of the true ones. Of course, the best source for this would be the Bible. Furthermore, we will see not only the correct way of fasting but also its intent and purpose.

To seek God's mercy. Moses prayed and fasted 40 days and 40 nights so God will have mercy on the Children of Israel (Deuteronomy 9:18). While Moses was on Mount Sinai receiving Ten Commandments from the Lord, they make a golden calf to worship. Thus, Israelites broke the 1st and 2nd commandments (Exodus 20:1-5).

In repentance. In the Book of Jonah, God commanded him to go to preach to the people of Nineveh. When the word of the Lord came to the king of Nineveh, he proclaimed a fast for all his people. As a result, God relented of the disaster that he had said he would do to them. (Jonah 3:5-10)

To prepare for ministry. After being baptized, the Lord Jesus went into the wilderness. Christ spent there 40 days and 40 nights praying and fasting. Moreover, three-time Satan attempted to test the Lord. However, all three times Jesus Christ rebuke the wicked one with the power of the Living Word of God (Matthew 4:1-17; Mark 1:12-13; Luke 4:1-14).

This is your homework, find other examples of fasting in the Bible (see Judges 20:26; Ezra 8:21-23; Nehemiah 1:1-4, 9:1; Daniel 9:3; Joel 2:12; Matthew 9:14-15, 17:21; Luke 2:37, 18:12; Acts 13:2-3, 14:23).

What is Fasting according to Jesus?

Before concluding today's Bible Study on Matthew 6:16-18, it is necessary to go back to where we started. Specifically to the question about fasting according to secularism. Do you remember how do they define fasting? Yes, it is the practice that benefits the body foremost with some effects for your spirit and mind. Thus, it is a total upside-down concept to the one according to Christianity.

According to the Bible, fasting is a discipline of denying the body its nourishment and fleshly desires for a time to devote oneself to seeking God. Although Jesus said to be not as hypocrites, we should not jump from one extreme to another. That is to say, that we should not act to be different than the world. But, if you are a true follower of Christ, to be not a hypocrite means to be natural, to be genuine in your heart before the Lord God.

But when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, Jesus said. That was a daily routine for the first0century Jewish. And not doing so would advertise one for the public. Thus, it suggests that the one who is fasting must have the motivation not to appear spiritually to others but to serve more single-mindedly to God. Again, Jesus emphasizes to do it in private to be rewarded openly by thy Father who sees it in secret.

How To Know If We Are Spiritually Healthy?

How Does God’s Wrath Differ From His Discipline

Worshipping According To One’s Eyes

If you have not yet accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, why not now!? Please, do not wait until it is too late! Embrace God’s Grace, Mercy and Love now – Accept Jesus Now!

Useful Study Materials:

The Henry Morris Study Bible – KJV

The Matthew Henry Study Bible – KJV

The MacArthur Study Bible – ESV

ESV Study Bible

Hebrew-Greek Key Word Study Bible KJV

The Complete Bible Commentary – George Williams

The Moody Bible Commentary – a one-volume commentary

Studies in the Sermon on the Mount by D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones

NASB Zondervan Study Bible

Chronological Life Application Study Bible – NLT

Rose Book of Bible Charts, Maps, and Time Lines

The Reformation Heritage KJV Study Bible

Holman Illustrated Bible Dictionary

#bible study #examples of fasting #fasting #fasting according to Bible #fasting according to Jesus #fasting and praying #God's rewards #Matthew 6 #matthew 6:16-18 #secularism #Sermon on the Mount #wrong ways of fasting

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thedreammweaver · 4 years

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Too Good to Be True part 2 (Burton-schumacherverse Riddlebird)

Part 1 part 3

Warnings: break up (not permanent), weight related prejudice, fatphobic comments

Ed paced anxiously around Ivy’s lair, he was supposed to be having drinks with her and Selina but it’d turned into him venting about Oswald. “Eddie, I don’t know why you’re so bothered,” Selina said “I mean, I get he’s a little overweight but-“

Ed scoffed “A little overweight?? Yeah, Selina, he’s a little overweight..and the pope is a little catholic.”

Selina rolled her eyes “That’s mean, Ed.” She of course knew what it was like firsthand to be disgusted by the penguin. However, after a specific occasion where one of her cats fell ill, the vets were closed, and Oswald was the only other person she knew of who had any knowledge on animals she had begun considering the man a friend. Now when she thought of him she only thought of the man who had compassion for critters enough to help her at four in the morning. “Have you tried voicing these concerns to him, darling?” Ivy asked, swirling a cherry in her drink before putting it in her mouth. “That may not be the best idea, he doesn’t handle rejection well.” Selina chuckled nervously, absently rubbing her neck. Ed sat down, bouncing his leg anxiously “How would I even phrase it? I mean what’s a nice way to say ‘Your body kinda makes me want to puke when I think about it too long and you could do with a facelift’?”

“Ed..” Selina scolded.

“Maybe you should break up if you’re so disgusted.” Ivy muttered, actually feeling a little bad for Penguin. Ed ran a hand through his hair “I don’t want to do that....I mean he’s great, really-“

“He’s just too ugly for you?” Selina said pointedly, standing up and folding her arms, obviously meaning to insult Ed rather than Oswald. “I didn’t say that!” Ed insisted.

“Maybe not with those words..” Selina growled.

Feeling a little threatened Ed got up to leave “This was nice..but I’m sensing I’ve become rather unpopular over the last few minutes.” Ivy raised a brow at him as if to say ‘You think?’.

The song was almost over Ed reminded himself. Oswald just had to want to dance with him, Ed tried to focus on the decor of the Iceberg Lounge instead of the soft rolls of pudge he could feel under Oswald’s clothes. He hated being so close with the man in public, all he could think about was what other people must think seeing someone as beautiful as him next to this waddling combination of strained buttons, messy grey curls, and the faint smell of fish. Ed tried not to be too tense as they swayed together however he couldn’t not wince when Oswald accidentally stepped on his foot once again. Oswald was too enthralled with Ed to notice, his head pressed against the taller man’s chest. “You’re so light on your feet.” Ed muttered sarcastically.

“What was that, dear?”

“You’re such a delight to me.” Ed spoke up. He cringed as Oswald sighed wistfully and cuddled into him further. Luckily for Ed, Ozzie didn’t want to dance for too much longer as he was getting lightheaded.

Oswald had of course offered to drop Ed off at his apartment, he was a gentleman after all and it was on the way from the lounge to cobblepot manor anyways. As they sat in the back of the car something strange began to happen. Oswald had dozed off and usually Ed found the other man’s tendency to do so annoying and his snoring grating but tonight he found it..sort of cute. Oswald looked so docile and soft when asleep, without realizing it Ed had unbuckled himself and scooted closer. Maybe it was the moonlight coming in from the window but the way it was lighting Oswald’s grey locks and pale skin up was...beautiful. Beautiful? Just an hour before Ed could barely force himself to look at the shorter man now he couldn’t look away. Something prompted him to caress one of Oswald’s cheeks, had his skin always been so soft? Ed moved to feel Ozzie’s hair as it had brushed against his hand, it was supremely soft as well. Ed didn’t know what had changed but he found himself taking in Oswald’s appearance in a different way, a kinder way. He sighed with relief, glad the problem had resolved itself, and Oswald would never have to know about the prejudices Ed had harbored.

Ed was taking his time in his bathroom getting ready as he was actually excited for this date for once. He was making Oswald wait in his apartment. Ed was quite proud of himself, for the last few days when they would talk on the phone he had actually been imagining Ozzie as himself instead of the princely substitute visage he’d conjured for the man. He was humming softly as he finally came out of the bathroom “Before you complain, I promise I’m always worth the wai-“ Ed cut himself off as he saw that in one of Oswald’s flippers was the muted green diary. His eyes were frantically scanning the pages with growing horror, his eyes were shining with tears. “Oh...” Ed had forgotten about the diary, once he had nothing to complain about he didn’t feel the need to vent to it.

“Ozzie-“

“How could you?!” Oswald hissed, looking up at Ed, he looked utterly betrayed. Ed was more concerned about defending himself than comforting Oswald “I don’t think that stuff anymore, baby! Besides those were mostly just jokes-“

Oswald interrupted by reading one of the entries aloud “‘When he started getting sappy I was so afraid he was going to ask me to marry him. The only pro to that, besides intelligent conversation of course, is with his diet he’s bound to be whisked off by a heart attack before his mid-forties, let’s hope I’d be in the will.’” Oswald was trying so hard not to cry “That’s funny to you?? Maybe I should go step out in front of a bus if my early death is such a laughing matter, give you a pick me up, hmm?”

Ed walked over to the shorter man “Oswald, I’m so sor-“ he was interrupted by Oswald throwing the diary at him, there were tears spilling from his eyes now “If you weren’t so selfish as to have let me love you..I would gut you like the pig you are.” There was such a tangle of heartbreak and rage in Oswald’s eyes “Don’t ever fucking talk to me again.” he spat before storming out.

#oswald cobblepot #edward nygma #the penguin #the riddler #riddlebird

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