#That’s also a southern/bible belt joke

[madstronaut]

my college roomies were from georgia. They taught me not only to use but also conjugate y’all -im talking advanced levels (all y’all) and expert level (y’all’d’ve <- yes that’s a real fucking thing) and also how to properly eat grits. Bless their hearts (affectionate)

also fought like cats and dogs, bless their hearts (malicious)

also taught me context of “bless your hearts”

also got besties in austin who I see quite often and every other you or all is a y’all

[froggybrainz]

Just a lil Willy concept (hehe)

I really like the idea that if Willy was southern. Like the blue collar, bust yo knuckles on the engine bay kinda of country. He's a hard worker with a bad back crunchy knees and ruff hands. Now, don't get me wrong, I do love the typical soft baby boy, William, but coming from someone who lives in the Bible belt of the south, I would like to give this kid some more red neck tendencies.

I also thought about if he was into photography and was really into the paranormal. He likes going off into the wilderness and sets up trail cams to possibly get some pictures of the rake or maybe even Bigfoot. With the lack of proper love from his parents, he found comfort in local conspiracies and legends.

And yes I made a Grossman joke and I know it's been done before

[fiddlefordisms]

Canon Details and Analysis of Fiddleford McGucket Part 1

I'm writing a series of meta posts centering around everything we know about Fiddleford McGucket as well as what can be gleaned from those details and some theories of mine. At the very end of this series, I will also do a detailed look, analysis, and theorizing about Fiddauthor (a ship which I love) - however, this series of posts will be focusing mainly on what's actual canon (and thus written in terms of Fiddleford's friendship with Ford) and will be mainly focused on Fiddleford's character even as it stands outside of his relationship with Ford. Because he deserves to be his own character outside the context of a romantic relationship, and he deserves it in general.

Fiddleford was raised on his father's hog farm in Tennessee. We've received very few details about his family life other than that the hog farm belongs to his father, Fiddleford has a cousin named Thistlebert who believes in aliens, and Fiddleford's grandmother who does not approve of "coffee" (whatever that is). What we can glean from this is that Fiddleford is pretty familiar with his extended family. We also know he grew up "dirt-poor."

In Journal 3, Ford mentions that Fiddleford crosses himself while stepping over graves and chastises him for saying "what the devil." Tennessee is also located deep in the Bible Belt. This tells me Fiddleford was likely raised Christian and because of the "crosses himself" thing - likely Catholic. He's the first McGucket to ever go to college.

Fiddleford has anxiety issues, possibly an untreated disorder - a fact commented on by Ford in Journal 3 (knee-bouncing, a tendency towards pulling at his hair, his superstitious nature might lend to this as well, and the "SORRY" photograph mentions that he's "mighty nervous" about his first day, he also mentions having the hiccups that day - probably due to how nervous he is). Given how these things go, it's probably been with him since childhood, and he was probably belittled for it. Especially given the stigma around mental health issues, it would not surprise me if Fiddleford has been told multiple times "to get over his anxiety."

Before meeting Ford, Fiddleford had a low sense of self-confidence (and even after meeting Ford, it might still not have been the greatest). His very first day of college, after being laughed out of class, he's already arranging for a tractor (the joke is he's Southern and from a farm) to pick him up. He was going to drop out of college on his first day had it not been for Ford. This tells us that he was led to believe that he was "not right" or "not smart enough" for college. Because it's only his first day at college, he probably didn't get these ideas ingrained in him from the campus itself. Theories? A few. One: His father probably wanted him to stay and help out on the farm - maybe even take over the hog farm one day. Two: Fiddleford easily leaps to the idea that he "got his math wrong" and that his theory must be incorrect because everyone else thinks so. This tells us he does not consider himself "brilliant" despite the fact that he is HIGHLY intelligent. He's also at Backupsmore instead of a first-rate school. Because Fiddleford has a lot of anxiety, I think it's highly possible something that could have led him to believe this is test anxiety. Schools put so much importance on testing, and because of his anxiety, Fiddleford might not have been able to perform very well on tests. He probably really excelled at doing his homework, though, and probably already had a bit of an inventing streak. He might have been persuaded by a teacher to give college a try and probably had an interest in it due to his affinity for machines and likely a love of mathematics and physics (and possibly chemistry given that Old Man McGucket mixes up a voice-changing serum at one point). Fiddleford mentions in the "SORRY" photograph that he thought making a friend was more impossible than solving relativity. This is extremely sad and points to Fiddleford having been lonely through his childhood and school years up until college. It's not hard to imagine that he might have been bullied for being a "nerd" as well. People tend to look down on those who display Southern mannerisms and interests (Fiddleford plays the banjo, has a strong Southern accent, and was probably raised to take pride in his Southern upbringing) as "dumb hicks" - and this might be a cause for even more bullying while he's in Backupsmore and continued confidence difficulties.

[tiddygame]

it is 4 am and i have changed my mind on graves being southern.

he’s actually from like missouri or iowa or some shit like that but he started working with a lot of brits who heard a vaguely american accent and called him southern. he started leaning into it as a joke but it very quickly escalated far beyond that and now he can’t go back

him being “southern” became so ingrained in the core of his being that the hollywood southern accent became second nature. why yes, he did grow up drinking sweet tea. gosh darn those hurricanes man… also he grew up in a swamp in the sticks that was also a dairy farm. lots of churches, right?

he is the south.

just don’t ask specific questions please it’s hard for a cishet white man to recall his Tragic Past in the bible belt :’(

[moku-youbi]

Ppl throwing all these states together like that's where the buffalo roamed, like my guys. Do you even know what the fuck you're talking about? Do you even know what indigenous people lived in those places? Do you know the geography of them? This country never was a monolith, even before colonisation. Also, I'm sorry, do you think that genocide that took place in the Midwest miraculously didn't happen in the rest of the 'super cultured' us?!

Ohio is hell, I'm not gonna lie...but it is not even remotely the same sort of land, population density, or culture as the flyover states and honestly doesn't feel like it belongs in the Midwest. It it's a fucked up blend of great lake state, bible belt state, southern state, union state, once fairly blueish state steadily turning red. Yes there is crop land (lot of soy as well as corn,) but it's also bordering Erie and in the foothills of the Appalachians. The major metropolitan areas are huge and pretty progressive. Columbus, the capital, is 14th largest in the country and 2nd in Midwest after Chicago. (depending on how you tally, it could be 6th or 7th in the nation, since it incorporates it's suburbs differently idk like ~900k city vs 2.1m metro). Cleveland, Cincinnati, Toledo, and Dayton are gigantic as well, and include tonnes of museums (art, science, children's, space, etc), theatres/ballet/orchestras, and two major theme parks. Columbus Zoo and aquarium is among the top 5 zoos (used to be 2 or 3 before Jack Hannah got sick). COSI, our epic science and kids museum was recently acquired by the American Museum of Natural History, which has made it even more awesome. There are constant festivals, exhibits, and activities, and even in the most remote reaches of the state you're unlikely to be more than an hours drive from a moderate sized town, likely less.

Meanwhile, the smallest areas are among some of the most disadvantaged you can imagine -- people still living without modern amenities, using outhouses, crippling poverty and malnutrition (look up mt dew mouth *shudders*), ravaged by the opioid crisis. Education and healthcare in these areas are a joke. I should know, I grew up in a midsized town surrounded by small, poor, rural areas. I've seen the devastation these conditions bring about. I've watched the worst parts of this state get worse, and the best parts slowly improve, and tbqh, while I'd like to live in a blue state, Columbus itself is a decent place, and there is Always something to do.

Betcha folks in Wyoming and Montana can tell you how wrong you are about them, too.

always blows my mind as a european when people talk about states like “yeah theres nothing in ohio/montana/wyoming/etc” because i look at a map like but. but theyre so big. every state could qualify as its own country what do you mean theres nothing there. and then i ask people from those states and theyre like “yeah theres nothing here” what do you mean theres nothing there!!!

[dovesndecay]

you can identify as queer and it can still also be a slur like these two things can be true. it is not ahistorical to say it's a slur when I've literally witnessed it being used as a slur. you have clearly never lived in the bible belt where people say 'those dirty queers'

The first time I remember hearing the word "queer," I couldn't have been more than a couple years old. Maybe 3 or 4. It was on the television.

"We're here, we're queer; get used to it." echoed through the room.

Now, I couldn't tell you which adults of my childhood were around me. I couldn't tell you the specifics of their conversation. But I remember the ... very specific flavor of condemnation that hummed behind every word they said.

I spent the majority of my life, with brief sojourns to other states, in a town of less than 15,000 in the toe of Louisiana. We had more churches than grocery stores or schools.

The unique sound of Southern Disapproval is one very familiar to me.

I was lucky -- mom's bi, too, and dad's an ally. But their support, even before I knew for myself that I needed it, didn't shield me from the queerphobia in others.

I never came out to my very southern grandmother. Maybe she knew, maybe she didn't. I stopped hiding it as much after I moved from Louisiana to Mississippi, and then to Florida, feeling more comfortable exploring my gender away from my family and our culture.

The reason I never came out to her was because every time I thought about maybe telling her, "I'm bisexual. I'm nonbinary. I might be some kind of aspec but we're not dealing with that right now" I would remember.

Midday at her kitchen table, in the house I spent most of my adolescence, where she let me play with bread dough and made me chocolate milk, and smoked her cigarettes. My back is to the tv, my focus on the task of rolling dough in my hands -- oh, stimming even back then -- and I am frozen by her furious exclamation, "Ugh, disgustin'. Gay men are one thing, but lesbians, I just don't fucking understand that nasty shit."

I grew up hearing that [relative] "dresses like a bull dyke." Disapproval. Judgemental. Found wanting.

I grew up learning that trans people were jokes or fantasies, but never real people.

The first time I heard the word queer, it was a battlecry.

It was a statement of existence, and a refusal to keep dying silent.

All of our words are slurs, and I get to choose which ones I reclaim for myself.

[rainybluebirdflower]

"Blinded by the Light" is a song written and recorded by Bruce Springsteen, which first appeared on his 1973 debut album Greetings from Asbury Park, N.J. A cover by British rock band Manfred Mann's Earth Band reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100 in the United States in February 1977 and was also a top ten hit in the United Kingdom, New Zealand, and Canada. Asked about the meaning of the song, he told VH1's Storytellers: “One version is about a car, the other is about a feminine hygiene product. Guess which the kids liked to shout more?”

Manfred Mann's Earth Band's recording of the song changes the lyrics. The most prominent change is in the chorus, where Springsteen's "cut loose like a deuce" is replaced with "revved up like a deuce." The lyric is a reference to the 1932 V8-powered Ford automobile, which enthusiasts dubbed the "deuce coupe". Springsteen was fond of classic hot rods in his youth, hence the line "cut loose like a deuce, another runner in the night". As the line is frequently misheard as "wrapped up like a douche", Springsteen has joked about confusion over the lyrics, claiming that it was not until Manfred Mann rewrote the song to be about a feminine hygiene product that it became popular.

According to Manfred Mann, it was the idea of drummer Chris Slade to use the chords of "Chopsticks" (the tune had at that point already been integrated into the arrangement) as a transition between song parts. The "deuce"/"douche" confusion stems from technical problems (which can be confirmed by comparing to live recordings).

"I don't think Springsteen liked our Blinded by the Light, 'cos we sang 'wrapped up like a douche', and it wasn't written like that and I screwed it up completely. It sounded like 'douche' instead of 'deuce', 'cos of the technical process – a faulty azimuth due to tape-head angles, and it meant we couldn't remix it."

Warners in America said, 'You've got to change 'douche', 'cos the Southern Bible belt radio stations think it's about a vaginal douche, and they have problems with body parts down there.' We tried to change it to 'deuce' but then the rest of the track sounded horrible, so we had to leave it. We just said, 'If it's not a hit, it's not.'

But in the end, it was No.1 in America, and so many people came up to us after and said, 'You know why it made No. 1?... Everyone was talking about whether it was deuce or douche.' Apparently, Springsteen thought we'd done it deliberately, which we hadn't, so if I ever saw him I'd avoid him and cringe away like a frightened little boy." — Manfred Mann, Record Collector interview (August 2006).

[will-o-the-witch]

Agnostic/Atheist anon from earlier! Thank you, again, for taking the time to read and respond.

I promise there is a question in here but I’d like to give a little context since I was purposefully vague with my request. (I didn’t want to be specific in case you were not feeling up to talking about antisemitism and I want to be respectful of that)

I was raised/live in “the South” in the US and it’s overflowing with g-d stuff. With that said, I have plenty of personal beef growing up with xianity. So most of the atheist/agnostic folks I know are ex xians. I’ve noticed a lot of the atheist/agnostic youtubers and in general American atheists/agnostics tend to lump major religions together as having “the same bad qualities”. That often times leads to antisemitic and islamophobic commentary because of the misinformation fed to them by their xian upbringing/culture. It deeply bothers me. But I can’t always pick up on the subtle misinformation or remarks.

I may have some problems with xianity but, to me, that has no bearing on my feelings about Judaism and Islam. I don’t know if there is anything beyond the here and now. Sometimes I’m hopeful there might be and other times I’m certain there isn’t. None of those thoughts or feelings should make a person be hateful to an already oppressed, marginalized group(s).

All of that to ask: how would you advise someone like me to learn more about Judaism so that I can recognize and combat antisemitism?

Hey there fellow Southerner! I’m in the Bible belt so I definitely feel you on xian stuff being EVERYWHERE lol. Where I’m from we have a joke that goes “If you want to get somebody lost, tell them to take a left at the church.” Most of our landmark directions go “Drive past the Methodist church and then take a right at the Baptist Church....” You’ve already done a big part of the work it seems, which is recognising that Judaism and Islam aren’t Christianity and that other religions exist as their own entities outside of however Christianity views them. I definitely recommend myjewishlearning.com, because it has a lot of stuff covered in short, easy to understand articles that will definitely help you get a bearing on some basics. 

I also recommend looking into more than just what Jews believe and shaking off the cultural christian lense when you catch it, because 1) Judaism isn’t a monolith in belief and 2) Judaism is more of an orthopraxy than an orthodoxy. This means that “correct” actions and rituals are generally much more valued than having the exact “correct” belief behind it. I mention this because if someone were to say, study Jewish theology though a culturally christian lense, which focuses heavily on orthodoxy with a touch of biblical literalism, they will likely come out with a VERY different view of what Jewish people think/do than what we actually think/do. So it may help to look up some of the more common rituals, like honoring Shabbos and what goes into it/why, or looking at how Jewish people actually relate to the text (or wrestle with it, as we often do) instead of assuming we take the more problematic elements of it at face value.  I hope that all makes sense! Let me know if you need me to clarify anything. :)

[drunklander]

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 505

ADSOOO!!! AND CLAIRE!!! AND ADSOOOOO!!!

My floofer was not amused when I woke her up to show her the cat on the teevee. Bqhatevwr, boo boo, you’re stuck with me. #TeamSocialDistancing

Oh, I guess the voice overs are back in a big way. Super...

And also like, this whole running bit about God and stuff would work so much better if they’d included Jamie and Claire’s faith a bit more throughout the show. *cough Jamie’s prayer cough*

Do we have to pour one out for science!jizz? This is the book bit where the science!jizz happened, but maybe they’ll do it later? Probs not. Le sigh.

Marsali being all excited with Claire and Claire being all fuck yeah I found it gives me the warm fuzzies. I LOVE THE TWO OF THEM A LOT OK.

This montage makes me dizzy. Not a fan, tbh.

Oh hey, the old Hancock building! With a park that looks nothing like Boston, haha. But I appreciate the effort lol, my main office is like a block from the old Hancock building. Not that I’ll be seeing it any time soon. Living that work from home life until the plague times are over.

But for real, social distance. No joke. Stay the fuck home.

I love 60s Claire if only because damn girl, look at dem legsss.

Hi, I’m Der and I’m very shallow sometimes.

But Claire has objectively great legs.

Omfg, Roger, stop being a butthurt whiner. You suck at being a soldier. You know you suck at being a soldier. And instead of being like yeah, let me learn and get better, you just bitch about it.

Sam is gonna kick his horse in the head at some point. Why the fuck does he dismount like that. It’s literally bugged me since season one.

So they’re pardoning everyone. Probs not Murtz though. Cool that instead of doing a continuous ramp up to the inevitable confrontation, they’re going the book route of lol, jk, all this was kind of a waste of time for now...

Really, Knox, you did something excessive? Cool way to say murdered a dude.

Ok well if Knox is getting the Ardsmuir roll, then he’s def gonna die, right?

Jamie’s 100% gonna intentionally miss Murtz’s face.

Boom, called it.

I do not like spiders. Please move this VO along, Claire.

I’m fucking glad we finally get Doctor!Claire. We should have gotten more Doctor!Claire in season three. Jamie got to have all aspects of his 20 years examined but fucking Claire’s side was literally just about Fred and how shitty he is.

Fuck you, season three. Fuck yeah, Doctor!Claire!

“It’s my married name.” Lulz. And not the married name she wants...

GRAHAM SAYS THE THING JAMIE SAID WHEN CLAIRE WAS STITCHING HIM UP IN SEASON ONE AND I HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT IT OK.

Graham makes me miss when the show was in Scotland like whoa. I miss the Squad. There are so many characters now that are like kind of always around but they’re not part of the Squad. And the main Squad is always separated. So like there’s barely any big group adventures anymore where we actually give a shit about everyone involved.

I JUST WANT THE FOLKS I CARE ABOUT TO HANG OUT MORE, OK!

Needle!jizz 2.0 is gonna be the closest we get to science!jizz, isn’t it. Whomps.

Can the show please just be a period procedural with Claire and Marsali being badass doctors? Thx.

Because for real though, Marsali being like “scalpel” is my favorite thing ever.

I feel you, Jemmy, I’d cry if I were stuck hanging out with Roger too.

I DO NOT LIKE SPIDERS, CLAIRE.

“My lass is more concerned wi’ words and deeds.” Which is why it baffles me that she’s still with you, bro, because your words and deeds fucking suck.

How Bonnet doesn’t accidentally swallow the diamond is beyond me.

Ok so if your wife was violently raped and you know she’s had some PTSD about it, because you’ve seen the drawings and stuff, you should maybe act completely the opposite way from how Roger is acting.

“And you kept it? A gift...from Bonnet.” Yes, you giant fuckwit, your traumatized wife went to hang with her rapist for shits and giggles and accepted a present because she really wants a memento to remember him by. They’re on such good terms and all. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! HOW IS HE SUCH A DOUCHECANOE?!

You do not get to judge or question how someone processes their trauma you raging asshat.

He is such a fucking Fred.

Do I think what Bree did was smart? Or a good decision? Hard no. But it’s what she thought she needed to do to move forward with her life. And so she can do whatever the fuck she wants. Yeah, words have consequences and it was a stupid move, but Roger needs to step all the fucking way off.

“You’ve never said as much to me.” “I didn’t think I needed to.” I HATE ROGER SO MUCH. I HATE HIM WITH THE PASSION OF A THOUSAND FIERY SUNS. HOW DO THE WRITERS NOT REALIZE THAT THEY’RE MAKING THE CHARACTER WHO’S SUPPOSED TO BE THE SECOND ROMANTIC MALE LEAD AN IRREDEEMABLE PIECE OF SHIT. OH WAIT BECAUSE THEY HAVE LOTS OF PRACTICE FROM FRED 1.0 THAT FRED 2.0 IS JUST A NATURAL PROGRESSION.

Lol at this “Boston” priest sounding vaguely southern. Is he one of the pedos the archdioceses just kept shuffling around?

(I’m not a fan of organized religion and being forced to grow up Catholic sucked a lot for me. I did some therapy about it.)

Ok so is Claire’s knife on her belt the hand job antler knife? I mean, Jamie doesn’t give it to her until Echo, but I’m gonna pretend like it’s the hand job antler knife. Also, some witches use a white handled knife called a boline to cut herbs and stuff so it’s fitting that Claire constantly-being-witchy-to-her-own-detriment Beauchamp has a white handled knife for collecting herbs.

“Yeah, Frank and I... no, we had a very complicated marriage.” Well that’s one way to put it. *keeps rage bottled up on the inside*

“Frank and I, we still managed to make it work, for Bree’s sake.” Except it didn’t fucking work. He was terrible to you. You basically put up with 20 years of emotional abuse for the sake of your kid and then he used her as a weapon against you. Because he is garbage. Much like Roger.

Claire is always the bigger person. She was with Fred and now with Roger. Like, I’m still pissed that she never got to let out her side of things. She just keeps framing it through rose colored glasses, never speaking ill of Fred when he didn’t do that for her.

WE DO NOT DESERVE CLAIRE BEAUCHAMP AND NEITHER DO MOST OF THE MEN ON THIS SHOW.

Fergus deserves milady.

They’re really going hard with the Roger, Bree and Jemmy have to go back stuff. Are they gonna bump them going back up to the season finale this year? They bring it up basically every fucking episode. I’d be down with moving that along tbh. Except then we’d have to have just the two of them as their own story line and I hate that part from the books.

“We are but humble servants to the law.” Really, Javert Knox. Would you say your duty’s to the law?

“Those who follow the path of the righteous shall have their reward.” Yes, bible and shit, but also a veRY FAMOUS LINE FROM A VERY FAMOUS SONG FROM A VERY FAMOUS MUSICAL.

“Scotland, eh? I never stopped missing it.” HARD SAME, GRAHAM. HARD SAME.

Pledged their oaths to the militia. Not the governor. Miiiinor detail, haha.

“It is a relief, to finally put down the sword and pistol and pick up the axe and shovel.” So, Jamie, you’re saying you’re gonna walk behind the plough-share, you will put away the sword?

Oh hey, it’s Joe! Another person we should have spent more time with in season three.

“Something about Graham Menzies...” Maybe the fact that he could easily have been part of the OG Squad?

I MISS THE OG SQUAD.

“Principally that men like Fitzgibbons never change.” Really, Knox, men like [him] can never change? A man, such as [him]?

“OUR DUTY IS TO THE LAW. WE WILL SEE JUSTICE DONE.” OK BUT THEY’RE LIKE LITERALLY TRYING TO SHOEHORN IN ALL THE LES MIS LYRICS THEY CAN LIKE THE TIME I DID THAT WITH I’M ON A BOAT IN THAT ONE RECAP...

“What kind of deceitful devil wears the guise of honor and talks of justice and mercy?” Valjean Fraser, at last we see each other plain...

“Believe of me what you will,” there’s a duty that he’s sworn to do. Protect his Murtz.

“As god is my witness, I will do what must be done.” You never shall yield? ‘Til you come face to face?

“Damned if I’ll be in league with a traitor.” Would you rather live in the debt of a thief?

“But I will not stand by and watch my kin hunted like a dog.” Like a dog on the run, Jamie?

Called it! Broski needed to die. You’re not gonna make sure the letters are burned all the way, Jamie? Like didn’t that dude who brought in the letters see you there? This seems like it’s gonna backfire *rull* quick.

Also, speaking of dead bodies, is Rando McWhatshisface still in the basement?

Is Adso Gavroche in this scenario?

Jamie Fraser, murder to kitten snuggles in 0.3 seconds.

IF YOU HURT ONE HAIR ON MY LITTLE BEBE’S HEAD, I WILL END YOU, JAMIE.

Slash finally, I thought this episode was turning into Waiting for Gadsot...

(I made myself chuckle a little too hard at that one, tbh.)

“I found him in an alley, couldn’t leave him behind.” AKA how Jamie Fraser adopts all of his children, haha.

“How would you feel about taking a trip to London with me? Your father wanted to bring you there before he died.” You mean, when he threatened to steal your kid from you? It fucking speaks so highly of Claire that she won’t ruin Bree’s impression of Fred. Even though Bree knows by now that he was a terrible person.

“Thank you for my gift.” YOUR GIFT LOVES YOU TOO, CLAIRE!

(And I’m still a sucker for the Claire calling Jamie “soldier” bit.)

[ginalinettiofficial]

a usa starter pack

alabama / deep south, conservative, hillbillies

alaska / far north, cold, nature, conservative rich white ppl + lots of native culture

arizona / hot, dry, scorpions, great mexican food

arkansas / yeehaw

california / socal is california of tv, norcal is hippies smoking a lot of weed

colorado / weed capital of the states, also lots of nature and skiiing

connecticut / to quote an SNL skit: “the haunting in connecticut?? what’s scary about connecticut?? losing your tennis racket at the pottery barn??”

delaware / ngl i never remember that delaware exists and i’ve never met anyone from here or heard anyone mention delaware ever. might be fake

florida / where the craziest shit happens. giant swamp with many major party areas as well as hella alligators, crazy politics, retirees, and felons galore. we all stan and fear florida

georgia / southern af but also p black. deep bible belt but atlanta is POPPIN and a super fun city.

hawaii / we colonized them and now like to invade their home regularly as tourists which sucks. hawaii is a cool little nation w lots of volcanoes

idaho / they make potatoes and racists

illinois / north side of the state is where chicago is, a HUGE liberal center in the US. very midwestern. as you get more south, becomes rural, small town, conservative middle america.

indiana / v conservative politically, illinois’ twin and bud, that’s where we get all our guns and fireworks. v midwestern. parks and rec is set in indiana and that’s p much all u need to know

iowa / worst state in the union everyone from iowa is just WEIRD yes i AM an iowa hater and i am PROUD. if u tell me ur from iowa i don’t trust you

kansas / they’re p chill. conservative state w some fun cities and midwestern weather. kansas city is cool

kentucky / horse races and hillbillies

louisiana / it’s a damn party. deep south, major french influence from back in the day, swamps, large african american population, new orleans is a jam, debatably the most melodic of southern accents

maine / rich white ppl in vests and chinos sailing on boats and eating lobster

maryland / baltimore & DC make maryland a pretty blue state

massachusetts / boston owns all of our assess. beautiful sprawling state w lots of old ass houses cuz it’s colonial and shit. boston has over a hundred universities so the whole area is very youthful and fun

michigan / michigan is vaguely shaped like a mitten so if u ever ask a person from michigan where they’re from they hold up their hand and point to somewhere on it as if their hand is a map

minnesota / the canada of the US. snowy, cold, midwestern af, hockey, casserole, mall of america

mississippi / s o u t h. education?? never heard of her. quality of life?? good joke

missouri / basically rhymes with misery and that’s all you need to know

montana / i think they have mountains and ranches and white ppl but don’t quote me on that

nebraska / even their cities are rural

nevada / las vegas and a whole lot of desert

new hampshire / whomst knows. one of those small east coast states

new jersey / new jersey is the florida of the north

new mexico / again, the border crossed them. basically arizona jr but they get mad if u say that

new york / nyc and then a bunch of suburban ppl who are mad they’re not from nyc but will go to their graves denying it

north carolina / racist white ppl who talk way too much about the confederacy in 2019

north dakota / one of the dakotas has that mountain with the four heads carved into it. that’s IT

ohio / ohio is deceiving cuz it has about six major cities and they’re all like fun and cool???? they all start w the letter c tho so good luck remembering which is which

oklahoma / ooooooooooklahoma where the wind comes sweeping down the plains (there’s a musical called oklahoma and it’s iconic) they share kansas city with kansas which is fun. cross between the south and the midwest

oregon / hipsters and rain

pennsylvania / philly is poppin, pittsburgh is slightly less poppin, scranton is where the office is set

rhode island / she smol

south carolina / see north carolina but with more ghosts and better food

south dakota / see north dakota

tennessee / memphis and nashville are FUN. p southern, p conservative, GREAT barbecue and huge music scene

texas / it’s texas

utah / mormons and conservatism

vermont / this is where bernie sanders and the people who make ben & jerry’s ice cream are all from

virginia / dc is in the north part of virginia which helps to split it into nova, the blue/urban/liberal part of the state, and sova, the conservative confederate lovin’ christians

washington / oregon but even more rain

west virginia / might be fake

wisconsin / cheese and beer and classic midwestern attitudes

wyoming / she’s a beaut ngl. it’s basically one big national park with some ppl sprinkled in here and there. harrison ford lives here

[lcyalty]

i don’t feel like making a joke to break the ice so here’s one of my favorite tiktoks: https://vm.tiktok.com/s1rSS5/ . anyways, hiii, fed admin sabrina here :) time to check off the introductory personality checklist: i’m 20, a leo, a slytherin, a woc, a pre-law major on the east coast, uhhhh harry styles and marvel trash, i play over 10 instruments, i prefer the thigh over the chicken breast, and i’m really happy u all r here and joined my little creation :’) smack that read more to learn abt my children daisy moretti and jude valentine so we can plot !!

                                                             DAISY MORETTI.                                                  pinterest: https://pin.it/7unKPi8                                                                     the basics: full name: daisy mia moretti | hometown: the bronx, new york | zodiac: aries | orientation: bisexual | employment status: intern on the news broadcasts floor | positive traits: social, determined, hardworking, attentive, confident, smart | negative traits: rude, irresponsible, cunning, cutthroat, insensitive, selfish

the backstory:

here’s the best way i can describe daisy: take the love for fashion and luxury of carrie bradshaw and cher horowitz, mix it with the power and intensity of olivia pope, and add in all the meanness of every single rude, b*tchy person you can think of. that’s her.

daisy was born to a huge italian family who all had odd jobs; her dad specialized in fixing the batteries on smoke detectors. her mom ran the laundromat down the street. a lot of her uncles owned car detailing businesses and she had a couple of older cousins who were janitors or low-level staff members at the local middle schools. while her family was fine with this, because hey, it paid the bills, daisy, who had always had expensive tastes from the start, turned her nose at it all.

she, unsurprisingly, became the first in her family to make it past high school. daisy did absolutely every major, resume-boosting thing while she was in school, because she learned very quickly that she liked power and being better than others. there was something she loved about coming home from school and getting to brag about her debate team win while her cousins could only nod. 

she was great at school, and she made sure everyone knew. she did mock trial, debate, sga -- she even joined the environmental club just for the clout. and then one of the people in her model un group said she should run for president one day.

it made sense. daisy likes power, she likes bossing people around and always being right, and she doesn’t take shit from anyone. she’d be a fantastic fucking president. so, naturally, after finishing college and pushing through an internship she didn’t really like just so she could have another bullet point on her resume, daisy applied for an internship at masters international. she knew she’d get the gig, obviously.

daisy loves fashion and luxury. she spends majority of her money on vintage chanel tweed matching sets to wear into the office, she has red bottoms that give her four extra inches of height, and her foundation costs over a hundred dollars. you’d think she’d want to be on the floors that deal with vogue and help organize new york fashion week, but that’s not going to get her a presidency, duh. daisy interns on the floors that handle the news broadcasts so she gets firsthand knowledge on all the shit, political or otherwise, that goes down in the country.

i would love to type more but i don’t want to hint at anything that points to her secret, so i’m going to explain a little more about daisy’s personality

she’s so, so controlling and bossy. she wants to be the absolute best at everything, and the shining star of it all. daisy’s definitely an attention hog, and she’ll bust her ass on her work to make sure she’s better than everyone else on the floor with her. 

daisy’s very picky about who she hangs out with. as a future presidential candidate, optics are very important, obviously. she only surrounds herself with people she deems to be good for her image, and she’ll gladly let you know that she thinks you’re too shitty to be around. she cares a lot about how she appears to other people, you know.

daisy is selfish and rude, and truly doesn’t care if she hurts someone’s feelings. she speaks her mind and has absolutely no filter -- which gets her into a lot of trouble, i’m sure you can imagine. 

wanted connections:

enemies: if you need a bad guy or work rival in your character’s life, i wholly volunteer miss daisy moretti as that bad guy. it’s not hard for her to make enemies when you consider her personality.

ex: please please give me an angsty ex plot filled with depth and all the details. there’s gotta’ be a reason why daisy wants to be not only the first female president, but also the first president without a spouse, after all.

hookups: listen. she has needs.

                                                            JUDE VALENTINE.                                                   pinterest: https://pin.it/1dfK9dE                                                                 the basics: full name: jude lee valentine | hometown: tuscaloosa, alabama | zodiac: gemini | orientation: heterosexual | employment status: corporate attorney for masters international | positive traits: friendly, warm, sociable, extroverted, smart, witty, energetic | negative traits: compulsive, secretive, disloyal, impulsive, ignorant, desensitized

the backstory:

picture it with me: a ranch. nice pale green shutters and a huge yard. there’s cows in this picture, too, and horses. there might even be goats. there’s a tractor by the two ford trucks, a dog sleeping on the porch, and not another house for another twenty minute drive. this is what jude valentine is used to. he’s a country boy from alabama, equipped with the southern accent and everything. yes, he has a pair of cowboy boots. yes, he brought them to new york with him. yes, he pronounces creek as ‘crick’.

jude is a very sweet boy. he was quarterback in high school, got good grades, and every sunday he went to church with his family because Bible Belt things. homeboy is named after a book in the Bible. he’s all about southern manners and hospitality, about treating people kindly and always putting others first, and he always keeps his morals in check. or, he used to.

when you’re home it’s hard to stray away from what you’re used to. the same held true for jude in college, because even though he went to u of alabama (can you hear him yelling roll tide), he was still in his home state so he felt those morals still stuck with him. but then he applied for law school and got a full ride to nyu law, and whew, the Temptation

‘cuz you see, jude was always a sweetie pie. he still is! in high school he was super popular because he was tall and cute and athletic but funny and brought extra biscuits from home to hand out in homeroom. i’m not gonna lie, he’s charming af. he’s smooth and he has good jokes. the girls loved him but the little sh*t had a purity ring.

but then he got to nyc for law school and let me tell you. alabama is not close at all to manhattan, now is it. jude was fine the first couple of weeks, just worked on his case briefs in his shoe box of a starter apartment... but the women. homeboy started sleeping around a LOT after a while. y’know wet dreamz by j cole where he’s like haven’t been inside p*ssy since i came out one? yeah, that was jude until ny, and he’s very much still like that

is jude still the sweetest, nicest guy ever? yes. is jude still the type of guy to knock on your office door and ask if you want to walk to get coffee with him even though you guys have probably never met? yes. is jude the first guy on the dance floor when there’s a midnight party on the rooftop? yes. is jude the type of guy who’ll fuck with you and say no, he only listens to music made by a spoon and a blade of grass if you think he only listens to country music? yes. but he also has slept with at least twenty different interns and employees at the office, so.

he also dabbles in the occasional little pill when he’s got eight depositions to write up before tomorrow but he was too busy screwing some chick the night before. he first did this in law school. but we don’t worry about that.

stop it, i know what you’re thinking: sabrina, come on. so he sleeps around, okay. what’s the big deal about that?

here’s the big deal: he’s engaged.

lil (i say lil but he’s 6’3” while i’m only 5’0”, so lemme stfu) cupcake jude is a cheater. he’s got a whole fiancée and yet he still sleeps with other women, and each time he’s like no, okay, that was the last time for real, but then there’s a new intern at the office and the higher ups always throw the new people at him because he knows how to make people feel comfortable, and his country accent is cute and refreshing among all the new york bs, and the whole attorney thing certainly isn’t a negative, and, well. he gets tempted. and afterwards he always tells the girl okay, please, can this stay between us.

u wouldn’t know he’s engaged either bc it’s not like he’s wearing the engagement ring, now is he

i’m staying hush on daisy’s secret but jude’s is that he’s cheating on his significant other with people in the office. is he still a nice guy? heck yeah, but also, you have to be a certain kind of messed up to keep cheating on your s/o and just not tell them. that’s a lotttt of lying you’re just comfortable with. oh, what’s that? you’re threatening to tell his fiancée that you two slept together because you think she deserves to know? well. he’d hate having to do it, but... jude’s not above knocking someone down if it means his secret stays hidden.

wanted connections:

hookups: literally i will take as many hookup plots i can get. doesn’t matter if they’re an intern or an employee; jude will sleep w them and then make them promise not to tell anyone in the office afterwards because “wE’rE nOt sUpPoSeD tO sLeEp wItH cOwOrKeRs” but we all know why he wants to keep it under wraps. this also doesn’t have to be an only connection; he can be friends w someone but also hook up w them on the low too

fiancée: this one is huge for me so pls pls message me if ur seriously interested in this plot and we’ll talk !!

friends: this one is so easy bc jude will literally make conversation with a chair. he’s super sociable and fun and approachable and he loves making friends !! give me some ppl he can pester during lunch break and throw balled up pieces of paper at

best friend: he’s gotta have that one person that he just clicks really, really well with. jude talks to everyone and he’s super friendly but this person is his confidant. he goes to them w almost all of his problems and rants to them and asks for advice and likes to just be around this person. trusts them w his entire life. hmuuuuu :)

ex: listen. we all need a good ex plot and this person is probably the only one in the office jude isn’t bringing a complimentary donut to

sister: jude has a younger sister and honestly she was gonna be a npc but the idea of him looking out for her at the office and getting all (ง•̀_•́)ง when ppl r mean to her is smth i reeeeally like. or maybe they actually don’t get along that well and bicker a lot but there’s still that underlying hey i’ve got your back. you piece of shit. type feel going on !!

[unproduciblesmackdown]

so the other day i looked up weiner, arkansas because that’s where the mccutters are from in academia nuts and yknow a) lore b) wanting to know more about a place called weiner anyways and c) wanting to know more about any location in arkansas because i don’t think arkansas is real and i don’t know anyone ever being from arkansas or what’s actually in it, and i’m joking but i really have no idea about Anything about arkansas except for one post that says it’s a weird place there were zebras on a farm there

the mccutters being from a small arkansas town was Deliberate b/c d) my new bff becca anderson aka half of the team writing the book was from a small arkansas town and actually did quiz bowl there and e) it’s just all-around thematically / plot relevant that the mccutters are this white evangelical protestant family isolated in various ways in a small rural not-rich middle of nowhere / southern / bible belt town

here’s some weiner facts

i think it’s technically also called west prairie? like, in some kind of official capacity it’s also registered as west prairie. but there was a railroad stop that the town eventually sprung up around and the railroad stop was named weiner after a guy there and the town that formed nearby was then just also called weiner. tough

apparently once called “the duck capital of the world” b/c duck hunting was / is(?) kind of a thing there. i mean, who’s gonna contest that

it Is a real small town....you could apply the 500-2500 population definition and call it a village....according to the 2000 census there were 760 weinerians and literally 11 were poc and as of 2016 there’s actually below 700 people living there now, almost a 9% population decrease....60% of the population is evangelical protestant.....

rice farming is a big thing there hence i guess the arkansas rice festival in weiner in the second weekend in october. i wonder what happens there

those above images are from the wikipedia entry, including the dilapidated reclaimed-by-nature car? did they include it for the potential metaphorical resonance?

lots of acknowledgement re: weiner being Noted for its Unusual name

is arkansas technically in the plains? these pictures seem very Flat i have never been to a flat place unless you count indiana, which i guess you sort of could. anyways i think they have the corresponding More Tornados Than Average

all those pictures seem like something someone might put on their southern gothic photoset and you’d have to go “okay but what makes it gothic and not just evocative”

anyways the other quiz bowl team in academia nuts being from walla walla washington seems to confirm they were interested in Weird Fun Names including how they outright confirmed that but they also said they did pick the location in the pnw to contrast the location of weiner, ak, and again yeah the mccutters place of origin was also not chosen just for the name and it does seem Pretty Fitting

gonna hit up my bff becca anderson and be like becca, imagine offbway rewrites, and my god but imagine the power if any of the mccutter kids are gays. all of them idc. becca listen

[doomedandstoned]

Southern Sludge Acolytes Midmourner Talk Roots, Drop New Sounds from Cavity Split

~Interview by Shawn Gibson~

Foreword by Billy Goate

It's been just a few years since I encountered MIDMOURNER at a show. The southern sludge band from Birmingham, Alabama was making a rare West Coast appearance and stopped in Eugene, Oregon to play an all ages venue called The Boreal (which sadly has since closed its doors). I was on hand with my trusty camcorder to capture the action and the sound turned out so well that the band issued it as a live album. For all the savagery of their music (and when you're standing right in front, just feet away, it is quite frightening, believe you me), I found the guys to be quite friendly -- reminding me of the fabled southern hospitality I missed most when I lived in the Bible Belt as a kiddo.

Since that encounter, Midmourner has been busy, most recently issuing a split with the band Cavity. Doomed & Stoned is proud to debut the song "When Knives Still Drove Conversation" from the Midmourner side of the record and, to accompany your listening, we've got an in-depth interview conducted by Shawn Gibson, who has made it something of a mission to document the unsung heroes in the underground sludge metal scene. Here, he speaks with fiery vocalist Shane Geoge and guitarist Bobbie Harris and they take an unexpected turn into the history of the punk scene in the southern states. A fascinating conversation in deed. Enjoy it while you soak in Midmourner's new track, "When Knives Still Drove Conversation."

Give ear...

An Interivew with Midmourner

Shane: Have you got a punk background? Because we do.

The first shows I went to were punk and hardcore shows in high school. That would be early to mid-nineties.

Shane: Beautiful, beautiful.

In school I listened to The Clash, Sex Pistols, The Exploited, Charged, G.B.H...

Shane: Oh, my god!

Misfits, Minor Threat, Day Glo Abortions. I told Billy Goate I love sludge and heavier doom just because it's some of the fucking heaviest styles of music.

Shane: I'm glad you can appreciate it. That's the thing, is people classify us as doom. All of us come from punk backgrounds. I think we hit our limit. Punks discovering metal. We add the heavy element to it. You've got to have the punk background, man. That's what differentiates between doom and sludge. I think that's why I gravitated towards sludge. It still has that "fuck you!" attitude. There is a lot of professionalism in doom that I can't subscribe to, you know?

Bobby Harris: It has a lot of punk D.I.Y vibe to it.

Shane: Exactly.

Bobby: You got old punk rockers who grew their hair long and have beards playing sludge. They dig the doom stuff. It's so metal and we are not metal. It's a little metal, more punk. We grew up in Birmingham Alabama punk scene. We'd go watch Cavity in the early nineties. I didn't know about sludge until I saw Cavity. Have you heard of ATP?

Alabama Thunder Pussy? Oh, yeah, I've seen 'em! Dude, I took my Mom to that show! She lives in Nashville, Tennessee, and wanted me to go to The Grand Ole Oprey. "No problem, mom, you have to come with me to a GWAR show." I was not going to tell her about the fluids!

Shane: Everybody must see GWAR before they die!

We were in Charleston, South Carolina. She was in town and Clutch, Alabama Thunder Pussy, and Suplecs played at the Music Farm. I said, "Mom, we got to go to this" and she did. She always jokes, "What was the name of that band we saw?" "Alabama Thunder Pussy, mom!" We laugh.

Shane: All that comes back to Kilara. Eric from ATP played drums. There was also the drummer from Avail, which was the greatest punk band that ever fucking existed, in my opinion. We went to a show, Kilara and Cavity inside a record store one night. Dude! Blew the fucking roof off the place! I don't know if your into Cavity or not?

I have heard of them. I haven't heard their music yet. I'll check em out.

Shane: You need to check em out!

Bobby: Without Cavity, I wouldn't be doing this right now. That's how much Cavity had an effect on me as a kid. That made me realize there was more beyond punk rock. It was more pissed off than punk! How can you be more pissed off than punk?

I'd say punk's pretty pissed!

Shane: Midmourner is Cavity plus Grief. That is Midmourner. That's it right there, man.

Bobby: It's a big fascination with Cavity. It's a big fascination with Grief. Cavity has that pissed off, fast, aggressive sound. Grief has that crushing heavy sound, you know? Together that's what we dig.

Shane: That is why we are tickled fucking pink knowing that next year we are going to play with Come To Grief!

Bobby: This is going to be a dream come true! I've been a fan since 'Disrupt,' man!

Shane: That's definitely a bucket list check, you know? We've got Carl, the merch guy from Come To Grief, with us.

Yeah, I talked to him when I was getting some Midmourner shirts from the table. Good guy!

Bobby: He's awesome!

Adorned in Fear and Error by Midmourner

Shane: So who is your favorite sludge band? Let's hear it!

There's a really good sludge band from Tulsa, Oklahoma I love, Senior Fellows. What's up, James!

Shane: Never heard of 'em.

Bobby: I've heard of 'em.

Shane: Good shit?

Dude go check them out on Bandcamp. 'Ecclesiastical Servitude' (2013) is my favorite album, their first. Very bitter, very dry. Heavy! I think Carl and I were talking about "No Cross and No Crown" attitude and ethos. One of their slogans is "Religion Mandates Oppression." Very pissed off!

Shane: I could see that.

I would say Midmourner is some badass sludge that annihilates. Glad to see you guys live and rip it up!

Shane: What did you think of it? We are interviewing you. How about that?

Uh, wow. First time. Usually the other way around. (laughs)

Shane: We are interested in what you think. How did you get into this, ya know? That's what I'm interested in.

I got into this because I love music! I will always do this. I will always share music that I like and know other people that would love to hear the same music. Music brings us together for a small moment. We are part of a family in this musical scene and I want the world to take notice.

Shane: Beautiful thing. Beautiful thing.

It still feels like a scene for me. I caught the ass-end of tape trading, but I love it and want to keep some that going. Now it's digital. You share music all day, anywhere!

You are going back home and wrap up this tour real soon. You were at St. Vitus bar in New York, as well as Charleston and Birmingham. It is a small world! When you meet people and you go on tour next year with Come To Grief: "Holy fuck, Midmourner! I love you guys, man!" Someone will say that to you guys and they will be stoked to see you live.

Shane: We are definitely going to remember you.

The comradery. I don't think you have this much of a family with other styles of music.

Shane: People don't give a shit, man.

I love meeting people and making new connections. Meeting people that you'll keep in touch with for a long time, if not forever.

Bobby: It's getting to know people on a personal level.

Shane: That's the fun of this whole thing.

It's intimate. It's a bond that some people don't understand.

Bobby: Unfortunately, they don't. I don't get it.

Shane: Keep it small. Keep it underground.

(Billy Luttrell of Hexxus sits down and rolls a cigarette.)

Billy: I'm not interrupting, am I?

No not all. Join us.

Shane: We were talking about influences of Midmourner.

Billy: Molehill.

Shane: I don't know if you know Molehill.

No.

Shane: Sludge pioneers from 2000? '97 to 2000-something.

Billy: '98 to 2002.

Shane: That was the beginning of this. Me and Billy, who is our fill-in guy, we've been friends for thirty fucking years! We did a band called Molehill. We raised a few eyebrows. If you go back and look, you can find it on Bandcamp. Matt, who passed away, and Sonny, the guy taking pictures -- he played bass in Molehill. Now I'm 44 and still doing this shit. It's ridiculous. It's for the love of fucking music, man! That's why it pumps our nads to meet people like you, you know? Who enjoy listening to this shit!

I'm excited to listen to it, to be able to discover new heavy bands or obscure heavy bands that are definitely underground.

Bobby: Oh, we're definitely underground! (laughs)

That's why I'm glad to meet you, shake your hands, hear and feel your music live. We've been talking prior to this show about meeting up, being able to grab an interview in person, and especially grab some merch.

Shane: That is the most meaningful shit.

I've shared this show tonight for awhile now, psyched to finally be here.

Bobby: It was cool because I did know you from Facebook.

Shane: He said your name, I was like I know that fucking guy! Are you friends with Billy on there?

Uh...

Shane: Billy plays in Hexxus. Man I'm promoting all your shit today! He cut in three weeks before we were going to leave. We were going to cancel this shit! He came in and said, "Let's fucking do this, man."

Wow! Love to hear about stuff like that.

Billy: You don't have to twist my nipples to make me go on tour! (laughs) I do a lot of fill-in stuff because I'm self-employed. I can leave anytime. I do stuff in friends' bands. They hit me up two to three weeks before the tour and Bobby was like, "Can you fill in for this tour"? "Shit, bro. When do we practice? Let's go!"

I'm glad you did! I'm glad you guys trekked forward.

Shane: It's been a blast! This is the last night. I could go another six months, maybe.

Bobby: No! (laughs) You've run out of Molehill money!(laughs) He was homesick before he got to Ohio! (laughs)

Shane: I'm ready to see the wife. I'm excited! It's cool to be talking to Doomed and Stoned again, man! That's cool!

Yeah!

Shane: We were hoping that wasn't a one of a kind of thing.

Not if I have anything to do with it. I would like to keep in touch with you guys. I'd love to share or promote anything I can for you guys. Next year when your on tour with Come To Grief -- holy fuck!

Bobby: We are going to have a new album come out with Matt [Heath] on bass.

Shane: We have a CD coming out eventually. Excited! We were able to keep all bass lines and bass recordings. That was cool as shit. I am looking forward to that! Doing what the fuck ever! Try to have fun!

That's what it's all about, having fun. Life is too short.

Shane: Oh, exactly!

Live at The Boreal , Eugene, Oregon by Midmourner

You guys are from Birmingham? So Roll Tide?

Shane: Absolutely, man!

I'm from South Carolina, so I'm a Clemson fan!

Shane: Uggghhh, sorry man! (laughs)

I player hate on Alabama big time! I give em respect them even though Nick Saban is the devil (laughs)

Shane: I got to give it to you guys, you took it one year.

Renfrow sneakin in there! Whew!

Shane: Tua is the shit man! We're proud, man! It was good to almost see Clemson get beat by Syracuse again.

I was nervous as shit! They pulled it out. Lawrence had a concussion, Brice and the Tigers did it.

Shane: I'm kinda worried about LSU just a little bit.

I saw they beat Miami.

Shane: They beat Auburn, too. I think Georgia is going to fall.

On that note, I'm good with what I have from you guys. Is there anything else?

Shane: Find Midmourner on Bandcamp! Find the latest shit. We have a new CD coming out. We have a 10" split with Cavity coming up. Very fucking excited about that. They are personal heroes of ours! Somebody is putting out the new album on vinyl in Europe, so we will have a vinyl release which is fucking awesome! We are looking forward to the Coming To Grief tour. We got to find a bass player. If you know anybody that's interested. (laughs) Have the gear and the drive to do this shit and we can talk! It was fucking great talking to you, man.

Yes!

Shane: We appreciate it. We love Doomed And Stoned! Fucking cool man!

Bobby: Thanks for coming out!

Shane it was nice to meet you and finally see you guys live!

Shane: Very nice to meet you, too! It's nice to see the actual face behind the posts on Facebook. We have nothing but good things to say about Doomed And Stoned and Shawn Gibson!(laughs)

I've got nothing but nice things to say about Midmourner!

Shane: Thank you very much! It means so much more than people realize! You know, it keeps you going. Unfortunately, the post-tour depression begins now. We are going to get back out there and slug it out!

Hell, yeah!

Shane: Hopefully get back here. That's about it, appreciate the hell out of it!

Thanks again!

Shane: Thank you man! Doomed And Stoned all the way! There's Billy packing cigarettes! (laughs)

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[quinintheclouds]

I was gonna put that in the tags too so I'm glad this was brought up! I'd like to add that in addition to being the most racially diverse region of the USA, it has by far the largest percentage of queer people. Stop joking about how Southerners should die or "just secede" cause that would only make life a hundred times worse for the minorities and impoverished people living there. Remember that the places with the most restrictive laws are very much into voter suppression as well, so no more blame tactics like "the minorities shouldn't have voted white republicans into office, then! It's their fault." Nope. Stop there. Do *not* blame the oppressed for their oppression. Think about how those in power have used privilege to ensure they keep it, be it through gerrymandering, voter suppression (especially in low-income areas and predominantly Black & Hispanic communities), withholding of information, outright cheating (they've rigged voting booths) and lots and lots of cash. The South (especially the bible belt) had the highest instances of slavery, and many didn't or couldn't move away even after being "freed." It's also by the border of Mexico and near Central American islands, so it has a large proportion of refugees and immigrants. Always keep in mind that citizens are not directly responsible for the actions of those in power, and are often directly prevented from being able to make a change.

Someone made an engagement map for TERF tweets

[north-texas-madhatter]

An old country boy... Sitting with my dad in the back yard at the edge of Tandy Hills overlooking downtown Fort Worth you would never know that you were in the presence of such greatness. He looks as old as time, Parkinson’s causes his hands to shake as he points to a family of raccoons just at the forests edge. My mom asks if anyone would like some tea and my dad cracks some corny joke that he has grown famous amongst friends and family for. I know he is hurting but for a man who could dig a ditch in 110 degree heat on his ranch he keeps a stiff upper lip but not one so stiff as not to smile at his own jokes.

He grew up in Springtown, Texas. A small dusty blue-collar town in the Bible Belt. The son of a Southern Baptist piano teacher (a kind but tough to the point frontier type woman) and a soft spoken father who worked for Swift / Armor Company. He was born in a room in a rock house sitting on a creek just outside of town and learned what tough was while working in the cold of winter and the stifling heat of summer. He bailed hay and saved up for college with a broader horizon in mind beyond what his small town life had to offer.

One of the earliest memories I have of my dad was a visit to his work for the Fort Worth Water Department. I stood there watching the bubbles percolate up through the basins of sand as he explained how water purification worked. I wasn’t all that interested, but his white lab coat looked neat and clean. The room was huge with high ceilings and I still remember the smell of chlorine being added to the water to make it safe for consumption by the general public. The building still stands today with beautiful archways and broken glass glittering in the sunlight just off the viaduct bridge off North Main Street.

On our way home we stopped at the Public Market building where I played outside. He soon emerged carrying a huge plastic cylinder that he had purchased from Cadillac Plastics. “What’s that dad?” I would ask. “We are going to do an experiment”, he replied. At that time the water was taken from a lake, sent into settling tanks, run through sand and lime and chlorine added so that you could drink it but my dad had an idea. One day he had been sitting eating a sandwich on a dock when a smelly, oily boat tied up next to him. He thought it was terrible that even with the filtering they did they still could not get all of the oil out of the water. So he took the cylinder and filled it with all the elements of the process already in place and ran a few gallons of water with a teaspoon of oil added. After doing this multiple times he could find some oil still present in the water that we would be drinking. But then he added activated charcoal to the process.

Performing the same test the oil was no longer present. I don’t have all the formulas or specifications of the process, but I can tell you that I do remember the look of joy on my dad’s face as he told me what he had accomplished. Now, this was not a new idea, the ancient Egyptian’s all the way up to Bear Grylls have used this process but for some reason water treatment plants at his time were not deploying this time tested solution for water purification. Afterward the process would be used worldwide.

After working for the Water Department my dad went on to get a job for General Dynamics in Fort Worth. He had two good friends in life. A Chinese fellow name Billy and an odd but very sweet man named Don. Billy, he met in college and is the reason he was able to pass his math classes. Billy would encourage my dad to study hard, often alternating between sitting and standing for hours cramming for tests. My dad would become lifelong friends with Billy and his wife, who later moved to New York City. My dad would attribute much of his early success to Billy and his study skills. Then later he would meet Don, another person who would be an influence. Don was a genius. Possibly one of the deadliest designers at the time.

He was tall, skinny to the point of being gaunt and paranoid for good reason. It was on a camping trip with my dad and Don in Colorado that I would find that he had three guns on him at all times. Scared of bears I asked how we would defend ourselves? That is when he delivered a .357 from a shoulder holster beneath his jacket and two more guns from pockets. It isn’t that he particularly liked guns or even had an interest in them. Not the smaller ones anyway. But when people say, the Russians might be after me, he really meant it. He was a weapons designer. He designed missiles, rockets and one particularly nasty device that would launch over the top of enemy troops and send small projectiles cutting them to ribbons. My father said that Don worked in a “special area” of General Dynamics where a sentry stood at the door and anyone found trying to enter without the proper clearance could be shot on the spot. With a frame like Ichabod Crane he would wave his hands around wildly if my father’s jokes were too long. But despite the many who may have met their demise at the devices created by Don he was a considerate and quiet man who loved dogs and would give the shirt off his back for friends (or a .357 for bear protection)

In a lab sitting across from the windswept runway of Carswell Airforce Base my dad could see planes landing and taking off again. The roar of war planes were constantly performing for the possibility of attack with their audience, a row of ominous behemoths, whose only purpose was to bring death and destruction on an epic scale, B-52 Stratofortress’s (Nuclear Armed). Rows of them ready to take off on a moment’s notice with a one-way ticket to Russia to deliver the ultimate gift, certain doom. To see these planes, take off all at once, meant possibly the end of the world.

It was a necessary evil, a deterrent, a status quo – a sword constantly at the ready.

Now, my dad hands me a picture, it is yellowed on the edges, black and white. He is standing with another man in front of dials and in another loading a large oven looking device. “Here I am putting carbon into an adhesive and compressing it for the skin of military planes” I sat there with surprise! “So this was the early stages of stealth technologies?” – “Possibly” he said with a sly smile.

The picture showed him, young slim and handsome in his black framed glasses surrounded by all kinds of technology we might see in an old Frankenstein movie. He carefully rises from the swing. The family of raccoons now eating from cat bowls scurry back to the forest at the bottom of the yard. He goes inside and shuffles through a mess of files laid out ready to tell a story to whomever might happen by. Emerging from the house he hands me a piece of what looks like charcoal with some material bonded to it. “I could have gotten in a little trouble but I forgot this was in my drawer until years later” Seems, that in many cases absent mindedness goes along with being genius and my dad fit the absentminded scientist to a tee.

It was rough and obviously aged but what I held in my hand was a piece of history. It allowed US warplanes to slip into enemy territory undetected by radar and destroy enemy SAM (Surface to Air Missile) sites. This saved countless numbers of military lives and air wars to be over in a matter of hours rather than months. It was a material that absorbed radar and along with the profile of the plane and placement of engines made it almost invisible to the enemy. That is until it was in sight, followed shortly by a bomb that incinerated the observer and the missile battery targeted by the specter pilot.

My dad’s talents were not spent all on the doom and gloom of warfare. He also worked on the first rocket to the moon. And would be thanked by one of the Astronauts personally for his and the countless number of other scientists who worked on the Saturn V Rocket. The rocket that propelled them away from Earth to the Big Cheese in the sky. A rocket that had its predecessors as test rockets, some that would blow up into ribbons raining back to the ground for my dad and his team to collect and figure out why.

After the Vietnam War contracts for war planes would slowly disappear. Layoffs were on everyone’s mind but my dad seeing the writing on the wall got a teaching certificate and finally after surviving two layoffs was handed his slip. He had saved the company thousands and thousands of dollars, saved an untold number of American’s lives, helped put men on the moon and won two General Dynamic’s Presidents awards. But nothing could save him from the letters of R-I-F (Reduction in Force) the dreaded layoff. And with a wife and young son to support he went home to his family.

That Christmas was dismal. We were worried what to do as my dad looked for a job. We drove through the city to see the Christmas lights to try and cheer ourselves up. That is when we noticed a man sleeping on a park bench in downtown Fort Worth. It was bitter cold and all he had was newspaper, we were not sure if he was even alive. We pulled the car over and my dad went to the trunk where he had an old blanket for emergency should we ever break down on the side of the road. Back then Winters were cold and blue northers could bring a warm t-shirt and shorts kind of day to a blustery snow filled sky in a matter of hours. Handing my mom the blanket they together placed it over the man but he made no movement.

When we got home my mother was concerned and called the police to let them know there was a man who we thought may be deceased. We all kinda sat there on the big burnt orange sofa that was so much the fashion of the late seventies. That is when we decided that instead of buying each other presents for Christmas we would pool our money and buy blankets for the homeless. It was the most memorable Christmas I had until the present ones spent with our own children. We handed the blankets out across downtown. My father soon after landed a job as a middle school teacher at Irma Marsh Middle School.

I never forgot that Christmas and how grateful people were that had far less than us. I would later be hiking through Tandy Hills Park and stumble upon a homeless camp. There was no one to be seen but from the items left behind it appeared that a woman had lived in the dug out hovel. There was a Bible, pictures of two children and a makeshift stove. It was close to the Holidays and a tree nearby reminded me of a Christmas Tree we saw while driving around handing out blankets. I returned a few days later with toilet paper, first aid items, canned food and Christmas Tree ornaments. The location of the Hovel was just down the hill from a stray Mimosa Tree that stood lonely on a hill next to the highway.

As Christmas approached my mom and I piled into her big blue Lincoln and drove downtown to do some shopping. As we approached the hill where the Mimosa tree stood I could see something reflect as it caught the sunlight. It was decorated with Christmas Ornaments! The same ones that I had left at the hovel. I would later learn that the woman who had lived in the woods picked herself up, got a job at the local homeless shelter and returned annually to decorate the tree. After her passing, friends and people from the community began decorating the tree in her honor and it was aptly named The Homeless Christmas Tree. It inspired a beautiful children’s book that my wife and I now read to our children every Christmas season. The tree is now slowly disappearing, and I have always wanted to create a sculpture to put in its place. Maybe something to add to those many retirement projects that I have planned.

It is now getting late and the mosquitoes are biting. I look at my parents and they look back, it is still a warm Summer evening but a cool breeze can be felt blowing through the trees. The cacophony of cicadas chirping out their symphony is almost deafening and it is time to leave one family to return to another. I know they won’t be here forever but my parents have made a lot of lemonade from the lemons handed to them over the years and it has prepared me for the challenging times I have had in life. Times that if just seen in a different perspective can bring great things to be achieved during uncertainty. Because in the end we would never know true greatness without great struggle. Or how a poor country boy can reach for and finally grasp the stars – my dad.

[notlostonanadventure]

The States summarized (for non-US people)

Alabama: Incest joke capital of the world

Alaska: We produced Sarah Palin we know we're sorry

Arizona: The inevitable heat death will end our misery soon

Arkansas: Our state is beautiful but our politicians are just fucking awful also meth

California: It's too big full of traffic rich people and every wannabe actor ever also HEAT

Colorado: Mountains and weed. So much weed. Blaze it.

Connecticut: Where old white people go to die

Delaware: WE WERE THE FIRST STATE and then we peaked

Florida: We know "penis of America" is a joke but by golly we are gonna live up to it

Georgia: We film movies here now. Also peaches.

Hawaii: Becoming a tourist trap and losing our culture was such a great trade.

Idaho: Potatoes. Puns. Neo-Nazis. Yup.

Illinois: Thank god for Chicago or we'd be bumfuck nowhere

Indiana: Cars! Trains! Forests! please ignore the Klan running this place in the '20s

Iowa: People leave here.

Kansas: The buckle on the Bible Belt.

Kentucky: Every terrible southern stereotype lives here. And horses.

Lousiana: YEAH N'AWLINS BAYOU SHRIMP COOKING MARDI GRAS what do you mean the rest of the state is a dump that hasn't recovered from Katrina

Maine: So much goddamn lobster also nightmares born here

Maryland: Are we hicks? Are we Yanks? No safe answer exists

Massachusetts: We have the biggest IQ divide of any state

Michigan: Help us we're dying

Minnesota: Bring up the accent one more friggin time why dontcha.

Mississippi: Look! Poverty.

Missouri: Look! Racism.

Montana: Ever seen a cowboy movie? That but depressing

Nebraska: Corn.

Nevada: VIVA LAS VEGAS god there is so much fucking desert

New Hampshire: Presidents care about us once every four years. Jokes on them- we're libertarians.

New Jersey: Great beaches! Fucking awful people.

New Mexico: Are we Americans? Are we racists? Red or Green?

New York: Bada-boom ignore the urine smell we're amazing

North Carolina: Voted Romney and Trump but hey we made Michael Jordan

North Dakota: YES WE KNOW ABOUT FARGO

Ohio: Our lake got set on fire.

Oklahoma: Yes there was a musical but also okra and terrorism

Oregon: Can the Californians please leave our hippie commune why is it so white here

Pennsylvania: We have two amazing cities and the rest is shit. Also Hershey's chocolate and the Amish.

Rhode Island: We're not even an island and that's not even the worst thing we've done

South Carolina: We sell fireworks. Also Stephen Colbert. YOU'RE WELCOME.

South Dakota: Home of the unfinished President Heads.

Tennessee: We made Elvis, whiskey, dry counties and crime

Texas: We're like five different states in one and it's only safe to be gay and non-white in a couple of them

Utah: Hey buddy! Wanna join our cult? Yes I'm on Grindr stop judging me.

Vermont: Syrup, cheese, and Ben & Jerry's. Truly the Hufflepuff of America.

Virginia: Named after a virgin but man are we fucked

Washington: Inventors of coffee, grunge, and weather-induced suicide

West Virginia: Okay, the REAL incest capital of America

Wisconsin: Home of cheese and the best footb- wait, what do you mean California makes more cheese than us

Wyoming: Guys? Hello? We're over here! We invented equality but we still vote Republican! Guys?