#Thank you again to the incredible Nym

[giggly-squiggily]

Putting The Moves On Him (My Hero Academia)

Heyo everyone! Guess who's back with some fluffy Todobaku for your viewing pleasure? This girl! The fabulous @intheticklecloset and I were yelling about Todobaku together as one does,and thus this fic was born! Thank you so much Nym for fangirling about these two with me and inspiring me to make something soft and squishy with them in it! I hope y'all like it :D

Cloud 9 (Taglist Peeps):

@duckymcdoorknob @baby-tickles2022 @rachi-roo @imjusthere07 @sevenincubistolemyheart

Summary: Todoroki's love language is physical touch, so much so just seeing it in his favorite drama's makes him swoon. Bakugou decides to give his boyfriend the real deal.

Bakugou wasn’t oblivious.

Well..okay, maybe SOMETIMES he drank from the carton without checking the expiration date. And sure- occasionally he might fail to see his headphones aren’t connected, leaving everyone to bear witness to whatever playlist he put together that only made sense to himself. Small, meaningless things that might lead to some discomfort, but ending at that. Discomfort.

He always made sure to make note of the important things.

~~~

A small sigh; gentle and breathy. Bakugou tried not to make his interest show as he dared a peek towards his boyfriend. They were in his room; lying across wrinkled sheets on their bellies as they entertained themselves. Todoroki was watching a show on his tablet, headphones in and cheeks flushed. The blonde didn’t have to see the screen to know it was a romance.

He dared a peek, trying for stealth as he watched the two characters on screen interact. They were fighting- but it didn’t seem like anything truly intense. The girl stepped forward in a sudden surge of emotion when it happened.

She was against a wall, the guy pinning her with a hand above her head. She sucked in a breath, as did Todoroki. His chest raised and lowered as if he were the one being pinned.

Bakugou fought off a smile, shaking his head at just how affected his boyfriend was by the scene. Returning to his Switch, he considered the various other moments he got to witness Todoroki swoon over as his Charizard destroyed the champion.

~~~

“Hey, come train with me.”

Todoroki looked up, not surprised by the request. “Right now? Haven’t we done enough these past few days?”

“One more day isn’t gonna kill you. Besides- I haven’t fought you quirkless yet.” Bakugou didn’t wait, turning and heading into the nearest room. He knew Todoroki would follow him.

“You’re as hardworking as ever.” The duel-quirked hero laughed softly, kicking off his shoes and wandering across the mats. “But that’s what I like about you. You’re always so persistent.”

“Tch- shut it.” Bakugou huffed, turning away before Todoroki caught a glimpse of his smile. “Let’s freaking do this! Come at me!”

“Why? You should come at me.”

“Cause I said so.”

“I don’t recognize your authority.”

“You son of a-fine, come here!” Bakugou ran at him, aiming low. Todoroki dodged at the last second, dancing out of reach as the blonde tried to grab onto him.

“Come on- Ol’e Or whatever the bullfighters in movies say!” Todoroki smirked, enjoying how irritated Bakugou looked. He pranced and dodged every grab and swing sent his way, throwing in little jabs here and there to really get the blonde going. “Is this what you can do without your explosives? You need more practice.”

“Ah, you son of a-” Bakugou paused, studying him. Then he calmed- a rare sight in a fight for him. “No, I know what you're doing. And it’s not gonna distract me!”

Todoroki would have asked what that was if the ground suddenly fell out from under him. A hand grasped his shirt while the other nestled the back of his skull. He landed flat on his back, Bakugou looming over him.

Oh…

Oh.

Was his heartbeat loud? Todoroki felt it in his ears, eyes wide and suddenly unable to breathe. His cheeks felt like lava, hot and tingly and dear lord the way Bakugou was looking at him- calm and smug and beyond attractive. He leaned down, and Todoroki involuntarily closed his eyes.

Only to blink when his nose was flicked.

“Gotcha.” Bakugou grinned at him, delighted at Todoroki’s fluster. “I win.” With that, he gave him a quick peck before shooting to his feet, running out the room like a child pulling a prank.

Todoroki laid there, heart racing and ears burning. He covered the stupid grin pulling at his lips with his hands, fighting the urge to make a noise in case Bakugou was still within earshot as he kicked his feet.

~~~

“Good grief- how much whipped cream did you put on that?” The blonde asked one morning, more amused than anything at the tall pile resting against Todoroki’s waffle stack.

“Not enough. It’s good for the brain.” He replied, swiping a finger through the perfect mountain before licking it, closing his eyes. “Sugar or something- ask Midoriya.”

“I’m not asking that nerd shit.” Bakugou rolled his eyes, a fondness in his smile as he watched Todoroki snag another bite. “How did I not know you had a sweet tooth?”

“I don’t- I just really like whipped cream.”

“That’s basically the same thing.”

“No- this is light and airy. Sweets are heavy.”

“How-ah, it’s too early for this.” Bakugou shook his head as he grabbed his water bottle, turning towards the outskirts around the dorm. “I’m going for a run. Be ready when I get back- it’s our turn to get groceries.”

“Hm.” Todoroki had picked up the waffle whole, biting into it as he listened to Bakugou talk. He looked like a squirrel harvesting; cheeks fat and happy. Bakugou tried not to laugh. “Sure, sure, no problem.”

“Good. Hey, hold still.” The blonde reached out, swiping a dollop of cream off his cheek. Without breaking eye contact, he licked his thumb, smirking when Todoroki blushed. “You know- it’s not all that bad.”

He took off, fiddling with his playlist as he disappeared out the door. Todoroki was stock still- staring at the waffle he bit into as he replayed that action over and over in his mind.

“Dude- you got it bad.” Denki mused from beside him, taking the other waffle off his plate. Todoroki didn’t even notice.

~~~

“Hmm..’He looked at her with such…context?’”

“Contempt.”

“I knew that!”

Todoroki smiled at the blonde’s annoyance, his eyes never leaving his notebook. They were working on their English homework together; Present Mic was insistent they kept their studies going even with everything else in the world going on. “You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”

“Like hell I am.” Bakugou grumbled, glaring at his own notebook. “You can’t even begin to imagine how many tutors had to help me before I could figure this out.”

“I always assumed academics were natural for you.”

“I’m not a genius like people say I am.” There was a touch of insecurity in his sarcastic remark. Todoroki reached out and patted his hand.

“Struggling with one subject doesn’t make you any less smart. You help me with any subjects I barely understand. I mean it when I say that; you’re a natural when it comes to this kind of thing.”

Bakugou flushed, cheeks on fire as he glared into his clenched pencil. Then he reached out- squeezing Todoroki’s shoulder. “Erm..thanks, Shoto.”

The half-n-half hero smiled gently, returning to his notebook.

“I never believed in fate until I met you. Now I know we’re meant to be together.”

Todoroki felt himself shiver, dropping his pencil at the words. “W-What?” He asked, turning around to look at Bakugou.

“What? I was just reading the next question out loud.” Bakugou didn’t look up from his work, hands scratching away at the paper. Todoroki felt his heart race again, trying not to clutch it as he took a shaky breath.

“Yeah..yeah, I see…” He swore he could see Bakugou smiling to himself. Only after he finished the last of the worksheet did he realize none of the translations even came close to that.

~~~

“Shoto.” Bakugou called out to him many weeks later. At this point, Todoroki was ready.

“Yes?” He asked when the blonde reached him. He could see the signs now- little quirks here and there. A suppressed smile, a glean in his eyes. His hands twitched with eagerness to do what he was going to do next. Todoroki’s heart raced with each fidget- also eager.

“I saw this new thing on the internet. Some cool handshake or whatever.” Bakugou raised his hands between them, flat and straight. Todoroki immediately knew what was happening.

“...” He did the same, mimicking the pose as he watched Bakugou smile. Fingers folded into the other one, leaving five digits standing. Todoroki did it with some feign hesitation, slowly dragging them down before looking at Bakugou. “Is this the part where we shake hands?”

Bakugou didn’t respond. Instead he hooked his own into Todoroki’s standing ones, bringing it up and above his head. That hand from before was back on his skull- cushioning the blow as he was pressed up into the wall. Another small gasp, his eyes widened involuntarily as he looked into Bakugou’s.

The blonde was grinning now, leaning in so they were forehead to forehead, his hand dragging slowly from Todoroki’s head to his neck then shoulder. The duel-quirk hero tried not to squirm, fighting off the giggles building up in his chest as the hand rested on his chest- right above his heart.

“Heh. Knew it. You totally love this.” Bakugou’s voice was hushed, a secret between them as he held Todoroki’s gaze. “Your heart is practically sprinting, Shoto.”

“Can you blame me? You’re so close..” He didn’t have the words to banter- his brain was barely working with Bakugou right there. “You really have been doing all this on purpose, have you?”

“Yeah.” No point denying it, it seemed. “Has it been working?”

“...Yeah.” Todoroki confessed. No point denying it himself either. “It has.”

“Good.” Bakugou laughed softly, letting the hand on Todoroki’s chest slide. He was about to take it off before deciding he had one more trick up his lack of sleeve.

“What-Ah! Ahehahahahah, dohohoohn’t you dahahahhare!” Todoroki squeaked, bursting into giggles when Bakugou began squeezing his side. “Nohohohooho, it tihihihiihckles!”

“That’s the point, Shoto. Man, you really gotta keep up with me, here.” Bakugou snickered as he leaned in to kiss him, smothering his giggle fits briefly.

Voices could be heard then. Uraraka and Midoriya- something about moves and whatnot. Todoroki felt his stomach churn with sudden dread. “Katsu-”

The door he was leaning on opened, sending them tumbling back. A few moves- a hand back on his head and a kick to wood sent them straight into Todoroki’s room, concealed away before anyone could witness.

“What was that?” They heard Midoriya ask.

“Maybe a ghost? Scary..” Uraraka added, their footsteps passing by with no stop. Bakugou waited, still as a statue until they couldn’t hear them any longer. “Wow- talk about a close call.” He turned back to Todoroki, bringing his hand out from behind his head and brushing his thumb against his cheek. “You good?”

All of it was such a daze. Between the wall pin, the kiss, the almost getting caught- and now he was once again pinned to the floor beneath his boyfriend, breathless and light. When Bakugou asked again, he reached up and kissed him, hard and fast.

“Mm!” The blonde yelped before melting, grabbing onto his shirt as he quickly returned the favor. “Damn, I should do this more often.”

“Mm…wait- wait, Katsuki.” At Todoroki’s words, he froze immediately, giving him enough space to speak. “Can I ask you something?”

“Right now? I mean- yeah.” The blonde nodded, brows furrowed. “What’s up?”

“Why…why did you do all this? The wall thing, the quotes- all that romantic stuff?” He had a feeling he knew the answer, but he wanted to hear it from his boyfriend's lips. “How did you know I’d…”

Bakugou blinked, considering. Then he grinned, laughing as he fell into Todoroki’s chest. “You’re so duhuhmb! Isn’t it obvious?” He looked at him, eyes dancing with such love it once again snatched his breath away. Damn- he was gonna need new lungs. “It’s because you love this kind of thing. You’re like- physically affectionate or whatever the love thingy is.”

“Love languages. But- you don’t like this kind of stuff though, no?” The blonde was never much for physical contact- griping and groaning over it whenever someone tried to hug him. “So why..?”

Bakugou sighed, the sound amused. “It’s not my preferred love thing, but…you love it. And I guess I don’t really mind getting physical-” He paused, wagging his brows. Todorki rolled his eyes with a laugh. “No but seriously- I know how much you love this kind of thing, and I want to give you the kind of love you deserve. And- mind you, I’m not against physical touch- obviously.” He gestured to their positions. “This isn’t my thing, that’s all. I’ll gladly give it to you-” Another pause- Todorki shoved at his shoulder. “Hehe, okay okay. I just know you well enough to make you happy.”

Todoroki felt his heart swell, eyes misting some at the words. Before Bakugou could panic, the half-n-half hero reached out, touching his cheek with a strong smile.

“I don’t think I tell you this enough- but I love you, so much.”

Bakugou’s cheeks flushed, eyes wide and smile growing. He leaned into Todoroki’s hand with a small laugh, puddy at his fingers. “Now we’re really recreating your romances.”

Todoroki laughed, pulling him close and kissing him once more, resuming their previous activity. Every kiss reminded him just how lucky he was to have someone like Bakugou in his life.

Thanks for reading!

[lesbonym]

Damn I prolly lost what little cool factor I still had cause my blog is just me being a goof ball for the most part, you prolly also didn't notice it cause it's my sfw blog cause I am still setting up my nsfw side blog but I keep forgetting to actually do anything with it

Also feel free to pull on my hair needy boy, it'll just make me bite on you and toy with you more, I would love to spend a looong time between your thighs turning you from needy nym into fucked out nym

Also >\\\\\\\\\\\\\< ruuuuuuuuuuuuuude, eye contact isn't something I'm the best at (prolonged eye contact in like a serious situation almost always makes me want to laugh just cause it feels weird, like tickling my brain of sorts) but when I am flustered I almost always try to hide about it cause there can be no witnesses to me being blushy (there are so many witnesses but if I hide then I can pretend no one can see how flustered I am) especially cause generally when I am pretty flustered my Domme will look like they want to eat me alive (or eat me out till I die) and it makes me even more flustered which compounds until I have no choice but to behave (I'm always a good boy for you cause you don't enjoy brats, but I love being a little shit to dommes who enjoy brats taming, unfortunately I'm not always good at it cause I care about my partners and so I can barely even mildly inconvenience them before I start behaving again, but I like to pretend I am super mischievous)

Also I know I already sent you a happy birthday message but I'm sending you another one

Happy birthday!!!!!

I wish I could teleport cause then we could go to a queer bar together and I'd buy you a drink cause you are hot, but I have a low alcohol tolerance and so if I ever try to do shots with people I am sloshed by the time I take 4 (drunk me is incredibly snuggly but also has no filter in a super embarrassing way, -i have sung an impromptu song about stegosaurus-)

-🦠

Hehe, in the nicest way possible, you were more cute than cool when you came to my asks, baby. I figured it was sfw, and I'll go follow the nfsw when you finish it. I just wanted to be moots >:3

God, I would die for some bites and marks on my thighs rn. I'm so freaking desperate that I'd love to get my pretty boy between my thighs so I can feel so good. I think you'd really enjoy fucked out Nym //////////

I'm not the best with eye contact at all, haha. I think I'd be extra bad at it during sex and stuff cause it's so freaking vulnerable. But I can understand how someone can find it hot! That's so cute how flustered you can get. Just giving me so much ammo to use against you, pretty boy

Thank you for the extra birthday wishes! I meant to answer this yesterday, but I think I dozed off while typing my answer to this 💀. I dont live in a city with many gay bars, but I would love for you to come and bring me to some! I need to try some different alcohols, so I think being with you would make me feel comfortable enough to try. I think I have a little higher tolerance? I haven't tried enough to be sure.

Now I need to hear about the stegosaurus song!

I do wanna bring the thing up about brats again because I don't want anyone thinking I don't like brats or anything. Even I can get bratty with dominant moots that I interact with. My personal boundaries with bratting have changed a bit, and I now know that I need to know the sub a little bit. Just figuring out personalities and never going too far is easier when I know the other person. If I can't figure out how to get a brat to listen to me, I tend to get irritable and think I'm doing something just completely wrong. Overall, I'm fairly neutral on brats, but I can't handle super serious brats that tend to need a big punishment to fold. I'm just not a fan of giving punishments like that, so I'd rather not have brats come in that are expecting that and get disappointed.

Though, as easy as I find it to fluster you, I definitely think I would be fine with you bratting

[intheticklecloset]

Hey Nym! I wanna speak on behalf of ALL your readers and say that we love and care about you and we all ADORE your writing! Just... most of us (Me included XD) are way too shy to come off anon or reblog your fics as who we are (i wish you could reblog anonymously-). Your drabbes are incredible just as your fics are incredible! You're one of 3 people I'm following and whenever you post, no matter what that post may be, I always look forward to it! You're an incredible writer and deserve to be told so. If I weren't a minor, I'd definitely commission you (but I don't have money TwT). Just know that we are in fact here, even if we lurk. We LOVE your writing (I sent a drabble request recently and I was afraid you'd get sick of it, honestly XD), soo... yeah! That's all I have to say. Wishing you the best of luck on whatever you do!

-The single shyest anon ever-

AHHHH thank you so much! 💖

Never worry about whether you can commission me or not - I know it's a crazy financial time for everybody right now (unless you're a billionaire), so I understand the lack of interest there these days. I'm just happy knowing there are people around who enjoy my content at all, but especially the drabbles, since that's all I've been able to manage thus far.

Thank you again!! I appreciate your kind words so much. 💖

[the-force-awakens]

nym! 💜🥹 came here to scream thank you for your kind tags and meant this message to be a reasonable length but now it’s longer than a star wars opening crawl and sappier than a hallmark card so. sorry about that. but anyway, here it is: i never told you this, but we met after i’d taken a long break from tumblr - i’d been sent so much hate by sequel haters that it’d gotten to the point where i’d get anxiety, so i’d deleted a huge majority of my sw gifsets and stopped blogging so much about it and as far as online went, felt my sw excitement deflate. you helped change that. you were so unfailingly kind and had so many incredible st insights and jokes and your love and enthusiasm were so contagious that it made me get over my anxiety and start blogging more about sw again, which made me happy bc i’d missed all the joy that galaxy far, far away had given me. so i guess i really just want to say thank you. 💜 you are always so incredibly passionate, creative, and talented, and above all, so relentlessly kind and such a bright spot in the fandom, even when i’m sure you’re stressed or having a bad day or dealing with annoyance in your own notifs, and i feel so, so lucky to have clicked that follow button. 🫶🫶🫶

oh, sophie 🥺🥹 when I tell you I just kind of had to sit my phone down and cry a little bit (happily!!) because of how overwhelmingly sweet this message is and how much it means to you?? Oh man. I'm gonna put my own star wars crawl length response below, but I don't think it'll be very coherent

I can't say I blame you there in the slightest. I didn't take a break from Tumblr, but I did leave the fandom at the very beginning of 2020 because of it, and - if you can believe - briefly threw in the towel of trying to defend the movies because of how exhausted I was by how loud all the haters were.

I wasn't actively even creating at the time, but I was hanging in active fan spaces at the time and the negativity then (and prior to that, back in 2018) was enough to burn me out on them, and gave me severe anxiety about the final two movies (which I'm actually still working through but seem to have finally mostly gotten over) — the fact that you actually got hate for it makes me so mad, you absolutely did not deserve that, the fact that so much of the SW "fan"dom is built up on tearing each other and the franchise down is absolutely heinous, when the movies are so full of heart and fans with that same amount of love should be celebrated not ridiculed!

It was a little bit because of that, that I went back and revisited the movies. I mean, sure, I missed my kiddos and had been not so subtly pining for Poe Dameron in that year break but, I knew I loved them, y'know? I knew those movies had a special place in my heart and I knew there had to have been a reason for that. So I became determined, hell or high water, to find the heart of those movies and refind my love for them and they made it so, so easy, it genuinely only took one rewatch for me to be sucked back in and fall in love all over again with that trilogy that really does just feel like home to me.

And then after that, I just decided to be as vocally positive about it as humanly possible, regardless of who listened or not, and any amount of hate I got on my sets or saw in my peripheral just made me even more ruthlessly determined to put more love and enthusiasm out there into the universe.

That said, I didn't expect to make any kind of difference by being so loud about it, but I'm so so so happy that it did and that you wound up in a place where you're comfortable to blog about star wars again 🥺🫂 and also for the record I wILL go into battle for you if anyone ever gives you a fuss again.

[airadam]

Episode 169 : Thirteen Squared, Fourteen Years

"Paid my dues, now pay my fee."

- Pete Rock

Another year in the books! This is the fourteenth birthday episode of the podcast, and it's wild to look back at how different the landscape looked back in 2009 when I started it off. At least nowadays, I don't have to explain what a podcast is! 

I needed a selection worthy of the milestone, and I think you'll enjoy it - Hip-Hop basically end-to-end, with some virtuoso performances on the mics, the boards, and the turntables. Turn the volume up and check the styles...

Book a ticket to see me play live in Salford with the 45 Kings and Queens on July 8th here!

Gigs & streams calendar : events.airadam.com

Twitter : @airadam13

Twitch : @airadam13

Playlist/Notes

Swizz Beatz ft. Jadakiss, Benny the Butcher, and Scar Lip : Take 'Em Out

Huge new single to open things up for this month, and a track I can already tell is going to make my list of top Spotify tracks this year. As part of the 50th year of Hip-Hop celebrations, Mass Appeal have released a couple of producer-led EPs with a selection of MCs, and this is of course from Swizz' contribution. It's not the production style most would think of when Swizz Beatz is mentioned, but listen for the classic "The Bridge Is Over" drums accompanied by what sounds like a pipe organ with the "evil" stop pulled all the way out - vicious. And the MCs, my goodness! LOX legend Jadakiss opens up, hands off to modern-day street rap giant Benny the Butcher, and cleanup duty is handled in fine style by the young and hungry Scar Lip. The video is great as well - chaotic, dark, monochrome, giving me just a taste of the same energy as the visuals for Ice Cube's "Wicked" back in the day. The whole package is hard like titanium.

Onyx : Throw Ya Gunz (Instrumental)

After starting the show with a track sampling the yelled into Onyx's first single, which was a big tune in its day, I decided to follow up with the instrumental as I hadn't heard it in so long. RIP to Chyskillz, the producer, who passed away in 2018.

Coach NYM : Work Ethic

One from my gym playlist for you, taken from the "Healthy Gangsta" LP. Part of the RBG movement, NYM gives a message on this track and the rest of the album that very much aligns with the innovative "Workout" LPs that stic of dead prez (their lowercasing, btw) released in 2011 and 2020. Turn this track up and get your motivation right!

Bronx Slang : Excuse Me Again

My man Jerry Beeks accurately and sadly points out that the subject of this track will continue to be relevant into the foreseeable future. Following up from the original "Excuse Me Officer" from the "Bronx Slang" LP, this is, in Beeks' distinctive style, a run-down of yet more Black people who have been murdered by the police. The producer Fake Blood gives it a soundtrack with just a hint of melancholy that still makes you nod your head thanks to his drum programming, and leaves enough space for you to hear every work clearly. Find this on the appropriately-named "Substance" album.

Blak Twang ft. Fallacy : Homegrown

I promise I didn't just try to find every track that sampled Onyx and throw them into this episode! The b-side of the incredible 1996 "Real Estate" 12", this is not only pure lyrical rawness from both MCs (Blak Twang/Taipanic/Tony Rotton and Fallacy) over a beat from V.R.S, but it's also the source of an incredible number of samples. If you go and check the excellent Blak Twang LP "19 Long Time", you'll be amazed how many times he samples himself, and from this specific cut - EPMD would be proud :)

The Musalini ft. Pete Rock and 9th Wonder : Carmel City 2

The vast majority of times, a sequel track is done by the original artist (for example, EPMD's "Jane" series, Ice Cube with the "Gangsta's Fairytale" pair), but this is an interesting exception. Pete Rock, the producer of the original "Carmel City" from his and CL Smooth's "The Main Ingredient" LP is here...but only on the mic, and even then only as the featured guest! Lead duties are taken by Bronx native The Musalini, and production is by a man who would absolutely name Pete Rock as an influence, North Carolina's 9th Wonder. This track has had a lot of rewinds in my headphones over the last month!

BusCrates : Get It Going

The brand new BusCrates LP, "Control Center" released this week, and it starts off with this serious groove, one which I had to let you get a good helping of before my voiceover! The new LP is overally lower in tempo than his "Blasting Off" album, and leans a little more in the direction of Hip-Hop while maintaining his funky and soulful style. BusCrates is an exceptionally skilled producer and DJ - as well as a thoroughly nice guy - who absolutely deserves your support. 

Little Brother : Sittin Alone

This track will, depending on your age, inspire mocking laughter or wry recognition! The time comes to all of us where the thought of hitting the clubs on a Saturday night sounds...kind of tiring. If nothing else, I'm sure everyone can relate to the flyer with eight different fonts on it :)  Mixing real feelings with a great bit of humour, it's just one example of the grown man rap on the "May The Lord Watch" album. As an aside - paying child support is not, of course, just a Black thing!

Kev Brown : Homework Part 1

Like most of the tracks on the "Homework" album, I wish this were a touch longer, but the man from Landover has a gift for leaving everyone wanting more! You can certainly hear his characteristic bassline action, while the high end is actually really prominent on this too, in a lo-fi fashion - almost sounds like a rough draft, but you know it's all intentional and provides a canvas for him to kick some lyrics, in case you forgot he puts in work on the mic too :)

Prodigy & Nas : Self Conscience

One of those great mixtape tracks from a previous era that you just don't hear around anymore, but absolutely deserves an airing. A concept piece lyrically, this has the late great Prodigy talking to his conscience, going back and forth, before Nas closes things out. The beat is by Infinite Arkatechz, who were basically the patron saints of sampling New Age and prog rock records (you might recognise this one). Find this somewhat forgotten classic on the "Nas & Ill Will Records Prsents...QB Finest" compilation.

dead prez : The Game Of Life (Score)

The "Soul In The Hole" soundtrack may be better known to many than the excellent film, but either way, here's the top-notch opening track, bringing a message to set the tone and frame the events of the story in a much wider context. This is actually my favourite iteration of the dead prez sound - tracks like this and "Sellin' Dope (Drugs Oppress People Everyday)" really stood out sonically from the mass of releases of the same time period. The production is provided by Da Heads - according to Discogs, only ever credited for this one song, but I'm wondering if somehow, somewhere, DJ Spinna is in the mix...

[Swizz Beatz] Nas : Salute Me (The General) (Instrumental)

Thumping, militaristic instrumental from the keyboard era. I love the opening on this before it settles down into the rhythm of the verses, which is even better on the vocal version with the opening adlibs.

Gunshot : Clear From Present Danger

RIP MC Alkaline. For those that don't know, Gunshot were truly one of the defining groups of their era, standard bearers for what became known to many as the "Britcore" style. The beats were almost always uptempo (this isn't even that fast compared to many), dramatic and dense, with a clear influence of The Bomb Squad - as time went on, this style went on to help give birth to other UK electronic music genres. The lyrics and delivery were always aggressive - as I say on the voiceover, think "action film" rather than trying to make you believe they were gangsters. This is one of the classic singles from this crew out of Leyton, East London, complete with a full lyric sheet on the back of the sleeve if you can get hold of the vinyl.

DJ Supreme ft. Son Of Noise : R.I.P.

More UK Hip-Hop royalty from the same era as Gunshot - the legendary DJ Supreme of Hijack producing for the mic-destroying Son of Noise on a 2016/7 release that shows that neither half of this combo have lost a step since they first came out. Raw, hard-edged, unapologetic British Hip-Hop on a battle tip.

Rob Swift ft. DJ Klever and Melo-D : 2-3 Break

One of the greatest DJs of all time and also a fierce defender of DJing ethics, rights, and responsibilities, Rob Swift is a man that should be held up high by all those who claim to represent Hip-Hop culture. On this 2002 cut, he pays tribute to the original "Two, Three, Break" by The B Boys (with the great Chuck Chillout on the wheels), and combines with two other turntable titans, Klever and Melo-D of Beat Junkies for a turntable workout over some classic beats and breaks. I was pleased to find that Rob's second LP "Sound Event" that this is drawn from is on streaming platforms, so don't miss out having a listen to the rest of the album.

Tobi Sunmola : Not The One

If you've heard me DJ on Twitch in the last few years, you may well have heard me play this absolute heater to great response! From Lagos to Manchester, Tobi Sunmola is a real talent with his own style, and kills it on this uptempo cut from his 2018 EP "Good Guys Don't Survive". Let's hope that this one does.

Ilajide : INDYNSUMRLUV

Faithful podcast listeners will already know how I rate this man, an incredible producer out of Detroit who hammers the funk into a sequencer like few can. The bassline is simple, but is just what's needed underneath those drums, where the hi-hats are doing the work of bringing the complexity while the kick and snare keep time. Very dope business from January's "NO SAUCEPAN TUESDAYS" album/beat tape. I'm assuming Tuesdays are for air fryers only.

Tobe Nwigwe ft. Coast Contra : DESTRUCTION

Tobe Nwigwe and his team are continuing to have success which is great to see - it's been four years since I first played him here (which is not when he started), and it's been constant elevation from there. This cut from last year's "moMINTs" album is big, booming, and as heavy as the title suggests, with Tobe, Nick Humes and Nick Baker on production. Guesting on several mics are the crew of dangerous Los Angeles MCs that is Coast Contra, who bring the heat to help close the episode in dramatic fashion. By the way, I realised how much time is flying when I realised that two members of Coast Contra are the sons of Ras Kass!

Please remember to support the artists you like! The purpose of putting the podcast out and providing the full tracklist is to try and give some light, so do use the songs on each episode as a starting point to search out more material. If you have Spotify in your country it's a great way to explore, but otherwise there's always Youtube and the like. Seeing your favourite artists live is the best way to put money in their pockets, and buy the vinyl/CDs/downloads of the stuff you like the most!

Check out this episode!

[hacked-by-jake]

Jake gets infuriated when he sees mc (Natasha) is giving more time to one of her college friend (Chris)

She didn’t notice..

Summary: Not enough talk, too many misunderstandings, too fast condemnation, too much jealousy. Too much attention and too much fear. 

Pairing: Jealous!JakexMc (Natasha)

Words: 3,8k

Warnings: Just a little swearing. Jealous Jake. Slightly arrogant Jake. (Fast plot (I'm sorry))

A/n: Thank you very much for your request, I hope you will like it and that it is okay. Otherwise have a nice evening/ day/ night and take care of yourself, stay healthy.

"Yeah, you’re right, class today was really funny, chemistry went a bit wrong, but next time we’ll make it, okay?" you finish the voice memo to your classmate Chris. You just come home from college and poured yourself a glass of water in the kitchen. "Hello MC" Jake greets you while he come out from his study. "Hi babe" you also greet him while you unlock your phone again to listen to Chris' quick response. You hold the phone to your ear and giggles as he says he thought the blue liquid was different than he thought. Jake sits on one of the kitchen chairs and watches you quietly. When you take your phone off your ear, he asks you, "Who are you talking to?" “Just with Chris from my college class, we had a funny accident in chemistry today," you tell him. "Who is Chris?" he asks a little skeptical.

"He’s not from here, he moved here to go to university, his father runs a big computer technology company. I don’t know exactly what the name is, but it’s one of the greatest, really cool, right? You two would probably get along" you excitedly tell him about Chris. He nods briefly for confirmation and you frown, "I don’t think so" he speaks so softly that you can’t understand him properly. "Everything okay?" you ask carefully. "Yes, all right, I have to keep working, okay?" The question was more rhetorical than he already got up to go back to his study. You shrug your shoulders and decide to answer Chris. "Mistakes happen to the best ones," you reassure him giggling, then you complain,"I just can’t chemistry, it doesn’t go into my head. At least you chose blue, I wanted to put the green stuff on it."

The first thing you decide to do is take a little break on the sofa before you start doing your tasks. "What about learning for IT? You said you had problems with one program, I know how to do it, I can help you." Chris suggests, and you like the idea. "That would be incredibly nice of you, I really need help, I just don’t understand this stupid program," you whine. "So I can right now if you have time?" he asks and sounds a little hopeful in his audio. "Sure, today is a good, I don’t have much to do," you confirm with a smile. Chris is really good at this topic, he will be able to help you perfectly. "Okay, how about 4 p.m., in the coffee rainbow?" he suggests, and you agree, "That fits" "Good, see you later."

-

The hacker sits annoyed in front of his 4 screens and stares at the loading bar which reveals how far the update is that he needs for one of his new programs. He stares at his screen in a bad mood that it is a miracle that the screen does not start crying. He bites his jaw tightly and his hands are clenched into fists.

He had heard that you wanted to be helped by someone else. That you’re meeting someone else to get a computer program explained. His father runs an IT company? That’s why you let this Chris help you? Damn it, he’s the best hacker the world has ever seen, and he’s your boyfriend. B-O-Y-F-R-I-E-N-D! He thinks about whether he should dare to check this Chris. But you just shouldn’t find out, otherwise you’d probably be mad at him forever. On the other hand, it’s actually his right to see who you want to meet. After all, Chris could been sent by the government, right? It’s possible they found out where he is and sent someone to arrest him. At one of his other screens, he begins the systematic search for Chris and also for the company.  He decides to take a look at the company first and then the rest. It quickly turns out that the company is a company that creates firewalls for large corporations. He laughs mockingly, he created the best firewall in the world. He’d get into the security system in a few clicks.

He have NYM-OS as a firewall.  NYM-OS is the best security program in the world. If he would sold NYM-OS and made it available to others, all other companies could close.

He would normally not react as extreme as he is now, if it weren’t for days. You’ve been talking to Chris every free second of every day. Even when he and you watch a movie together, he always notices how you consistently take a look at your phone. And as soon as you have a new message, you answer. It’s driving him crazy. And every night you get this 'good night' message, and always with two red hearts, two red hearts! Damn, he’s not a person who cares about emojis at all. He’s the ':)' type, who only uses  '<3' as a heart.

But what if that’s not enough for you? What if you want more, someone using the right emojis? That’s ridiculous, it’s just emojis. Does Chris know you have a boyfriend? Did you tell him about it? Actually, you guys tend to keep it private. Why would anyone care?

But right now, he wants you to tell the whole world. Everyone should know, even if that weren't good, even dumb. But the hacker just has the urgent need that everyone knows is at your side.  A look at the clock in the corner of his screen reveals that it is already half past three.  So in 15 minutes, you’d be going to your meeting.

He decides to wait with the search for Chris until you leave, so that he can concentrate on it. His program is finally finished, so he’s going to do this first.

-

Until you knock on the door 10 minutes later. "I’m meeting with Chris at the Kaffe Rainbow now, okay? He’s helping me out for college" you explain, and you’re smiling at Jake.  He is really so beautiful.  "Okay, which subject?" he asks you casually without turning to you.  "A tool. This doesn’t work right, but it’s important for my subject."  You don’t even seem to notice how much your words hit him, and the openness you tell him about it hurts him. Of course, it’s better than lying to him, but it still hurts him.  "All right," he grumbles and taps annoyed around his keyboard with his fingers.

"Aren’t you saying goodbye to me?" you ask unsure, wondering why he is so dismissive of you. "Of course," he answers quietly and finally turns around.  You bend down to him to give him a kiss but after a second he immediately moves away. "Take care, see you later" he sounds almost disinterested and you notice a prick in your chest. "I love you, my heart" you mumble. "Yes, I love you too, Natasha"

Wow, 'Yes, I love you too?' Yes? Why 'yes'? 'Why is he so dismissive? Did I do something wrong?' you wonder in your head. You decide to talk to him later when you get back, but now you have to go, you don’t want to keep Chris waiting.

The door falls shut and Jake moans loudly and rubs his hands through his face.This fucking jealousy is really terrible! He’s growling, the thought of you going out to meet this Chris guy makes him mad.  His heart is racing and he drops his head backwards against the back of the chair.

This is not normal.

Yeah, that sounds very dramatic. But he swore he’d always protect you and never let you go. You’re the first person he really cares about besides Hannah and Lilly. You are the first person he can imagine sharing his life with, and right now he sees this future in danger. All the attention you’ve paid to Chris over the last few days is making him nervous.

And even worse, he doesn’t know how to deal with it or what to do so that he doesn’t feel so bad about it.

He really would have a lot of means to get rid of Chris, which sounds a lot like Mafia, but that’s not what it mean. He could make a few simple clicks to get Chris to move back to the city he came from. Get him kicked off campus or something. But unfortunately, he swore to himself that he would use his arts and talent exclusively for good and important things. He could never destroy anyone’s future.

He just has to trust you, you would never lie to him or cheat on him. You wouldn’t leave him, you love him, you said it a few minutes ago. But his thoughts seem to really drive him crazy. Scenarios where you’re in the end because of Chris, spitting through his head. How he sees pictures of you on Instagram, how you spend your life with Chris. How you still keep in touch with his sisters, and all those things.

Luckily, it suddenly rings at the door and drives away these horror stories for a short moment.  He jumps up from his chair to escape from the room, which suddenly seems so narrow and small.  He hurries to the front door and with a lot of momentum he opens it. Outside, Hannah stands looking at him in surprise, "Hi," she chuckles as she sees his strange look, "Have you been drinking too much coffee or where does this energy come from? “  "Oh well, Hello Hannah" he greets his sister and makes room to let her in.  "How are you? " she asks lovingly as she closes the door again.  "Yes," he replies, as quickly as the thoughts have gone, they have now returned.  "Huh? Yeah? Jake this is not a real answer to this question" she informs him.

„Oh no, I mean, yeah, all right, and with you? " he goes straight back to his room. Hannah follows him with a skeptical look.  "Ok, something is wrong here! " she notes and folds her arms in front of her chest, waiting for an answer.  "Everything okay, Hannah, really, but what are you doing here? " he quickly distracts and lets himself sink back into the chair.  "I’m here to pick up Natasha, the whole group is meeting at the  Rainbow, where is she? " she inquires. Jake snorts bitterly,  "She forgot your meeting, but don’t worry, she’s already in the rainbow," he explains. „Wow, wow wow, okay. It’s not just 'something' wrong here, Is there a war or what? What happened? Did you have a fight?" worried, she sinks onto the small couch.  Jake have his arms crossed and looks at the ceiling, and turning around on his chair. "Ask Chris when you’re at the cafe," he murmur "he'll tell you, whats going on" "Who is Chris? " Hannah raises an eyebrow in surprise. Her brother grins mockingly,  "Someone from her college. Who really gets a lot of attention"  His sister twists her eyes,  "Now don’t let me ask everything! Just tell me what happened"

In the short version, the hacker tells his half-sister about his problem and what happened the last few days. How he feels and also reveals to her his fear of losing you.

"Watch out" begins Hannah, "Put on your shoes and a jacket and let’s go!" Motivated, Hannah jumps up. "Where?" Jake asks cluelessly.  "Well, you’re coming with me to the rainbow. We’re all meeting, and you’re now with everyone, too. And I’m your sister so you have every right to come along!" "I don’t think it’s a good idea, otherwise Natasha still thinks I’m spying on her" The brown-haired one laughs, "Yes, that’s exactly what we do, so come on," she forces him.  "Hannah I-" he tries, but she raises an index finger to silence him, "No, get dressed! Come along!" "Stop beeing so revenge funny, Natasha is your friend," he reminds his sister.  "Jake, you’re my brother, and even though she’s my friend, I don’t like the way she treats you right now. And I’m not doing anything, we’re just going to have a coffee. Besides, I have every right to be mad because she forgot about us, and I think that’s a shame"

Said and done

5 minutes later, the siblings enter the beautiful coffee. Immediately the large group is noticed, which has to push two tables together each time, so that there is enough space.  "Ah Hannah" shouts Thomas as he discovers his girlfriend.  She takes her brother by the hand to pull him behind her, but his gaze is not on the group, but on you. You’re laughing at a joke he made for you by Chris while he explains to you how exactly the program works. Jake doesn’t like how close you sit next to each other, of course you both have to be able to look at the screen, but that’s extremely close.

-

The call of Thomas for his girlfriend makes you look up from the screen and immediately you meet the neutral, almost cold look of your boyfriend. Surprised, you draw your eyebrows together. You didn’t expect him here. You don’t have a chance to give him a sign like a smile or something, he’s already sitting at the table.  From here, you can’t hear what the others are saying, but when you see the look on Hannah’s face, you suddenly come to remember that you were on a date with the group.  "Can we go on?" Chris asks and pulls you out of your mind,  "Ooh, sure," you mumble. You really have to apologize later.

"What are you doing here?" Richy asks the hacker, "And why is Natasha sitting back there with someone else?""  Before Jake can answer, Hannah takes the job off him, "Natasha is otherwise busy, she forgot about us." "Serious?" Dan asks in amazement and then looks at Jake, "Trouble in paradise?" "Funny Dan. Really funny" Jake hisses and twists his eyes.  "Hey, that was just a joke," the bearded one explains, "I just wanted to say that the guy is weird."  "Did anyone talk to her?" Hannah asks. "No, we were just waving at her, I thought she’d be here soon, but it doesn’t look like it," says Thomas. "Hi guys" Lilly welcomes the round. They’re all here now. While Jake’s second sister takes off her jacket, she asks, "What’s going on here?" She points to you and Chris in the corner.  "We’ve been transferred," Hannah tells her again.

After Lilly sits down, the hacker begins to tell again what the problem is. "And she didn’t realize you weren’t happy about it?" Lilly asks and sounds a little angry.  "No, she doesn’t know," Jake sighs. "I’ll clear this up" the blond-haired woman shrugs her shoulders and gets up.  "No wait" her brother tries to stop her but she doesn’t let herself be disturbed.

You notice Lilly coming towards you with a not enthusiastic look.  "Hello Lilly" you greet her still smiling.  She nods neutral and pulls a chair back that creates an unpleasant squeak on the tiles. "Hi" she calls and looks expecting, "Who is that?" She immediately comes out with her concerns. You are almost swallowing up, "This is Chris, we have some subjects together at college," you explain to her. What’s going on now?

She stretches her hand across the table to Chris, "Hi, I’m Lilly Donfort. A friend of Natasha’s and her boyfriend’s sister," she imagines herself abruptly. Chris even twitches slightly at her sharp tone, "Hi, I’m Chris" responds a bit insecure and shakes her hand. "Haven’t you forgotten something?" explores she further. "Yes, I know, I’m really sorry, I’m just stressed about the subject, the exam is in two days and I don’t understand it yet. Chris offered to help me and I just forgot, "you apologize.  "Why do you let Chris help you? You haven’t forgotten who Jake is, have you?" she says cynically. "He’s mad, isn’t he?" you ask in shame and look away.  "Of course, think about why, and if you’re watching a movie while you’re in his arms, pack up the phone," the blond-haired gasps. You swallow. You did something wrong. "I didn’t want to hurt you," you mumble.

"Oh you didn’t hurt me directly.This with the meeting isn’t so bad. It’s just about Jake" "Wait, so you have a boyfriend?" Chris asks in between.  "Oh, she did," Lilly knocks twice on the table to underline her statement.  "The one who looks over here in between with this death look?" he asks amusingly.  "What’s funny about that?" Lilly pulls up an eyebrow. "Well, he’s trying to kill me with his looks, as jealous as he seems," Chris explains.  "Hey, stop talking so pejoratively about him, okay? He loves me, so he shows," you defend Jake right away.  "It’s okay, I didn’t mean to attack you, but I wonder why you didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend?" "I didn’t think it was important. I mean, why? That has nothing to do with the university?" astonished you look at him. "Well, I thought if we were meeting, you’d be single?"  "Oh no" Lilly chuckles easily, "Here’s a misunderstanding" "Yes, that’s it, I thought there is something between us," Chris shakes his head.

"You have thought wrong," Jake suddenly interrupts you. Without wasting a second, he leans down to you to press his lips on yours.

A goose bump runs over your body, his voice sounds icy and rough. His lips are possessive and the hand in your neck makes sure you can’t leave his lips. But you don’t want it either; this moment should freeze. Each of his kisses is like a piece of heaven.

You get lost in that kiss. Forget everything around you, your thoughts, the people who luckily aren’t too many, Chris, Lilly, the group.

All you feel is your heart racing and your lips tingling. A short moment later, Jake releases you, "I’m sorry for the rudeness" he whispers against your lips.

You smile, "No, I’m sorry, I think we need to talk."

Jake turns his gaze away from you to Chris, but stays close to your face, "I think you can go now" with a mocking grin on your lips. Chris pulls up an eyebrow, "calm down" "Bye" the Hacker growls and waves while Chris puts his laptop in his pocket.  "I’ll see you in class tomorrow," Chris turns back to you. "And next time, maybe you should be careful what chemicals you mix together. Anyone who can read is clearly in advantage," Jake pushes another mockery after him.

Jake sighs and puts his eyes back on you, "I won’t apologize," he immediately clarifies.  "You don’t have to apologize, I guess I was a little too inattentive in the last few days" "Just a little bit" he jokes and sits down on the chair next to yours.  "I should have thought about what I say. And I shouldn’t have ruled you out," you apologize, "and I should have explained to you why I let Chris explain to me how it works, and not from you. l really didn't mean it bad, I just didn’t want to keep you from working.You’re so stressed right now and if I’m honest, Chris' father is also a professor and he teaches my informatics course. And when Chris tells his father that he help me, the father sees that I care. Simple psychology. His father will keep it in mind whether he wants to or not. And honestly, when you explain something, I feel like you’re telling me how to hack the NSA," at the end you chuckle easily.

"Maybe you should talk about it at home. I don’t know if you still want to stay here but I would like to order a coffee now also" Lilly shows to the waitress who stands at the table of the group and writes the orders of the others on a piece of paper.

-

"You know, actually, it wasn’t bad at all what you did," Jake murmurs. You’re lie half on him, your cheek is squeezed together on his chest while he plays with your hair.  "I think I exaggerated, I was too jealous. But you know, I’m a computer nerd, and my girlfriend asks someone else for help with a program on a computer. I know it’s ridiculous, but somehow I felt personally attacked, like that you think he’s better than me. Do you understand?" he asks quietly.  "Yeah, of course I understand, but don't think like that, okay? No one is better than you," you pull with your finger small circles on his chest, "And I would have been jealous too. You know, I like Chris as a friend. I didn’t want you to think I was paying too much attention to him. And the fact that I always answered him immediately doesn't mean anything. I wasn’t just looking at my phone because of him," you assured the hacker.

"And I didn’t think it bothered you that much, if I’d understood it before, I wouldn’t have done it. But I should have thought more, then I would have understood it sooner. We should both talk to each other more openly next time, okay?" you suggest and hold your hand towards him. He nods, "Deal!" he puts his hand in yours then shakes it.  "I just love you way too much to be able to see someone else at your side. I’m just afraid I’m not good enough for you."  "Jake, you’re way too good for me, really. Never think you are not good enough, you are everything and much more, I love you to infinity and beyond." "I love you even more" he whispers, and then turns so that he lies sideways opposite you. He presses his forehead against yours and sighs, "But I still don’t like him"  Before you can make a teasing comment, he’s already pressed his lips on yours.

His jealousy is just to sweet :)

🌹🎭

Masterlist

[spotofmummery]

Tales of Nym

[Previous AMAZING Post (read it!) by @scholars-of-nym​ ]

Amon hung on to Setoto’s every word as his imagination spun mental images of the world that she wove. He watched the way her face lit up as she spoke of the beauty of her home in ages long past. He also watched her struggle to work through the terror of how it all ended.

Despite only just having come across her for a second chance meeting, something in the Elezen couldn’t help but be moved at her tale.

Again, he was drawing parallels with his own story. He remembered the horror of the realization that he and the other Allagans were sinking into the deep earth within the confines of Syrcus Tower. What had once been their palace had become as a tomb, and only by stopping time itself had they survived. But there was a terrifying time when Amon wondered if he’d ever see the sun again.

But that almost seemed to pale in comparison to what he imagined the scholars of Nym experience. To be stricken by deceit, unaware. Cursed with an illness that left their own people no other means but to seal away the sick and attempt to drown them...!

“You must be an incredibly strong and courageous soul, surviving what you have,” Amon told Setoto, not hiding his admiration.

It was hard to find the words to respond to a story such as this - he certainly hadn’t expected her tale to be so grim. But like her, he did not seek to dwell on the darkness.

“The memories of the wonder of Nym live in you and your stories. I hope you know how precious ‘tis what you share with me. And how I appreciate it.”

He paused, too, taking the fresh tea with a polite nod of thanks.

“And you say you have found a cure for your people? Are there others still struggling with this illness to this day?”

[chasingforeverandaday]

Can I ask for #23 from the fluff writing prompts please? “I’d rather live in the woods with you than in a mansion with some (boy/girl/person) I barely know.” I mean, it’s just screaming gendrya at me! Thank you!

Well, how does some Regency era AU sound? This one ended up a full on one shot, because I fell down a rabbit hole real fast. Also I got to write Robb, which was super fun because I never write Robb. He may be a bit out of character, but I feel like if any of the Stark siblings would understand Arya’s conflict of love and duty, it would absolutely be Robb.

half agony, half hope

There are times that Gendry Waters thinks his life would be so much simpler if he’d ever actually learned how to say no to Miss Arya Stark, sister to the Lord of Winterfell. He can stall her in her impulsivities yes, or can sometimes talk her around to his point of view on a matter, but straight up denying her when she looks up at him with those big grey eyes and the pout he always wishes to kiss from her lips?

Stronger men than him would capitulate without question.

Stronger men have.

So when she barges into his smithy one June morning, he steels himself for whatever new (potentially scandalous) misadventure she has in mind for them. But the stricken look on her face as she quietly requests that he close up early and meet her in his personal quarters ignites a panic in his belly, and he hustles the other customers out as quickly as he can after she leaves.

Door locked and forge cooled for the day, he hurries through washing up and finds her in his rooms, pacing back and forth in front of the hearth. He can see the exact moment she notices his presence, as her head whips around to his and her face crumples. Terror seizes in his veins and he crosses the room in two strides to pull her into his arms.

She doesn’t fight him, just lets herself be held for a moment before wrapping her arms around his waist so tightly he thinks she’ll never let go. A shudder passes through her slim frame, then one hand reaches up to bend his neck downwards, her mouth seeking his.

Gods know he’d be happy to kiss her forever, but something must have shaken Arya badly for her to show up unannounced and ask him to abandon his work. Pulling away to lean his forehead against hers, he asks, “Love, what’s wrong?

A tiny voice he’s never associated with Arya Stark whispers, “How quickly can you be ready to leave?”

“What?” Utterly bewildered, he pushes her back farther so he can read her face, but she just burrows her face into his neck, clinging onto him like a limpet. Cautiously, he moves them to his narrow bed, sitting on the edge as she falls into his lap, all the while never letting him go.

She looks up at him then, eyes a little harder, a little more sure as she takes his hands in hers. “Run away with me. Gendry, please, we need to go, and it needs to be as soon as possible.”

“I don’t understand, I thought we had more time, that I had more time to…” Prove myself worthy of you, let myself learn to let you go, something, anything but be forced to watch you choose between me and your family.

“My mother’s invited suitors from houses Frey, Dayne, and Arryn to Winterfell, and I heard her tell Robb earlier that she won’t be letting me reject all of them.” Turning away as she speaks, Arya curls into him more, making herself look even smaller if that were even possible. “She intends to have me wedded and bedded by the end of the summer, seems to think it will curb my more unladylike tendencies.”

“Arya, you’re only twenty two for gods’ sake. She can hardly be that desperate to be putting you on the shelf already!” Almost as an afterthought, he mumbles into her hair, “And I like your unladylike tendencies.”

A sad smile on her face, Arya cups his cheek with her palm as she stays seated in his lap. “I know you do. I think she just wants me to be someone else’s problem now. Besides, all my siblings but Rickon have made good matches and are married. But what my mother said isn’t the important part.”

There’s a subtle shift in her voice as she draws herself fully upright, the pain replaced by something a little more hopeful. She’s finally looking at him again, her grey eyes searching his.

“Because Robb…” she took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders before looking him straight in the eye. “Robb told her he thought I should have more of a choice. He said that yes, I should marry, but that it didn’t have to be one of them. He told her that none of them would make me happy, and that I should marry a man who made me smile, not grimace every time I looked at him.”

Rubbing a hand up and down her back, Gendry cannot help but wonder, “That’s good, even I know that’s a good thing, but why…?”

“Because Robb walked out of his study and found me standing there, pale as a ghost I’m sure. He took me back to my room, and he told me that he thought I shouldn’t be forced to marry a man I didn’t love.” One of her hands comes to rest over his heart, fluttering rapidly at her touch. “Somehow, he knew about you and me, because then he told me he’d been thinking about commissioning you for some ironwork around the estate, and perhaps I could go to town to speak with you about it, since neither he nor Bran could do so today.”

The pieces fall together, and a little of Arya’s hope finds a home with Gendry. “So you think he’s giving us his blessing, and we’re running away.”

“I know he is, he just can’t come out and say it because of who he is.” Threading her fingers through his own, Arya holds their clasped hands together like a talisman, pressing a light kiss to the back of his before looking up with a smile. “We’re going to Gretna Green, and we’re going to get married like we’ve wanted to for three years, and then I’m going to actually learn how to keep a house and run your smithy, and we’re going to be happy, Gendry, so incredibly happy.”

“Aye, in our tiny little home with two rooms and no grand paintings or pianos or anything fancy like what you have up at Winterfell.” He knows that Arya says she has no care for those things, but he needs to remind her of the difference in their standing, just one last time before they make this choice that will alter their lives forever.

“Stupid boy,” she giggles, poking him in the nose with the first true grin he’s seen on her face this afternoon, “I’d rather live in the woods with you than in a manor with some person I barely know. I mean, ideally we live somewhere with a forge for you, but as long as you’re with me, I’m hardly going to be picky.”

Bending down, Gendry allows himself to brush a quick kiss to her lips, a promise made without words. “Give me a few days, so I can finish up my orders and get everything ready so I can leave. Just don’t say yes to any other proposals, and we’ll be saying our vows in a fortnight.”

-/-/-

A sennight later, as she prepares her horse for the journey as surreptitiously as she can, the stable door creaks open. Terrified that it will be that one stablehand who always tells her mother when she leaves the estate without asking permission, Arya hides in the shadows of Nymeria’s stall, peeking out into the center aisle into the hazy, pre-dawn light.

It’s Robb, carefully shutting the door behind him. He walks straight up to her hiding place and holds out his hand to her, a small smirk on his face. “Come out sister, we’ve not much time to waste.”

Slowly, she leads Nymeria out of the stall, fingers tightly gripping her reins. Her brother looks older than she’s ever seen him before. He looks like a lord in a way he never has before, one with the world weighing on his shoulders. But then her eyes meet his, and he smiles at her, and Robb is her big brother once more.

Dropping Nym’s reins, Arya throws herself into his arms, trusting that he will catch her implicitly. She’ll miss this, she thinks, having a brother she knows she can depend on.

When they finally pull away, Robb reaches up to wipe a tear she hadn’t even noticed from her eye. “There now, this won’t be the last time we see each other, little sister. Besides, one would think you’d be happier to be heading off on such a grand adventure with your blacksmith.”

Laughing wetly, she replied, “I am, trust me, I am anxious to start our lives together, I just…” here she shrugged, fidgeting her hands as she tried to gather the words to express herself. “This is the last time I’ll be in Winterfell as Arya Stark, or maybe ever if Mother reacts the way I think she will when she finds out. I’ll miss it here, even when Gendry and I have a new home. It’s all I’ve ever known.”

“You’ll always have a home here, for as long as I’m the lord. Probably after too, as you and I both know you’re Little Ned’s favorite auntie. But I think you’ll be far happier living wherever you and your husband end up than you would locked up in a London townhouse with whatever ponce our Mother has handpicked for you.” The disgusted face he made at his own words made her smile again, which she knew was exactly why he’d done so in the first place.

Serious again, Robb placed a hand on her shoulder and gave it a light squeeze as he said, “I’ve grown to love Jeyne, I have, but I’ve never looked at her the way your Mr. Waters looks at you, or you look at him, and neither has Sansa’s husband. You’re incandescently happy whenever you’re near him, and I can always tell when you haven’t spoken to him in days because you’re so quiet, like you’re holding in all of your thoughts until you can share them with him.”

He sighed before continuing in a soft tone, “If you hadn’t found him, hadn’t fallen in love, then I would try to arrange a marriage for you that could lead to your overall happiness in life. But you did. You fell in love years ago, and I’m glad that at least one of us gets to experience that joy in this lifetime.”

Moving to hold her hand in his left, he reached with his right into the breast pocket of his coat and pulled out an envelope. “This is the information for the accounts I’ve had set up in your name in London.” He placed it in her hand and looked her square in the eyes. “You may not be marrying with a proper trousseau, but this way you won’t be entering this marriage without your dowry. You don’t need to worry about Mother’s reaction either, I’ll take care of it. Jon will meet you in Scotland, I’ve already sent him an express explaining everything.”

Shocked at all the things he had thought of and put in place for her, Arya could only manage to sob, “Robby, I…” before hugging him again.

Her brother pulled her close once more, placing a kiss on her brow before pulling away. “I love you, and I’m sorry I cannot do more. Be happy, Arya. Be happy and one day when we’re old and grey, you’ll tell me stories of all your adventures with the man I know you love and the adorable little children I’m sure you’ll have. Now go, the tasks I set for James cannot take much longer, and you have quite the ride ahead of you.”

With that, Robb helped her onto her horse and led her outside as the sun rose. After he let her go, Arya pushed Nymeria into a trot, determined to make her way to the closed smithy before the people of Wintertown fully awoke. She only let herself look back once, barely able to see the figure of her brother as he waved her off into her future.

[7deadlycinderellas]

No more math and history, ch6

Ao3 link

BIG TW in this chapter for discussion of an incident of religiously motivated child abuse. Please read responsibly.

  Halfway through second session, Sansa’s halfway through reading a letter when she suddenly starts slapping the side of Arya’s arm, making her drop her sandwich.

“You’re never going to believe this!” she gushes, pushing the folded letter at Arya. She takes it and scans the words quickly.

Gendry has paused eating his soup.

“What is it?”

Arya can barely believe her eyes. There’s a polaroid photo included and Arya runs her finger over it.

“Robb wrote that Nymeria came home. Gods, it’s been six years, I figured…”

She doesn’t say. There are still wolves in the north. She stares at the photo, at Nym’s blue eyes, at her gray markings. She wonders if she will even remember her.

It’s nice for a letter to bring good news this time.

She’s sick of Ygritte being so distant, so between her and Sansa, they decide to ambush her during the next rest period.

They both approach her on her cot with arms crossed.

“OK, Ygritte, we’re not leaving until you tell us what’s wrong.”

She tries to stare them down, but Arya and Sansa are better at it than her. With a deep sigh, she reaches into her trunk at the end of her bunk and pulls out a folded, battered letter.

Arya scans the back before turning it over. Sansa hunches over her shoulder so they both can read at the same time.

“You didn’t tell us you heard from Jon,” she says, miffed, “He hasn’t written any of us yet.”

Sansa’s still reading while Arya talks and gets to the middle of the letter first. She clamps her hands over her mouth to stifle a squeal.

Ygritte looks at them both, and mutters, helpfully, as though they hadn’t just read the letter.

“He asked me to marry him.”

Sansa squeals and her hands fly to her mouth. After she’s calmed down, she asks.

“Don’t you want to be part of our family?”

Arya rolls her eyes.

“Don’t mind her, she’s as big a romantic moron as Jon has always been. Also-”

Arya runs her finger along one line in the letter.

“He asked you, ‘how you would feel about getting married’, pretty sure that’s as indirect as Jon can get. He’s probably terrified of what you’ll say.”

Ygritte looks at Arya dubiously.

“So what should I tell him?”

Arya shrugs.

“Tell him how you do feel about getting married. Which, I might ask, is what?”

Ygritte sighs and pulls her knees up to her chest.

“It’s not that I never want to get married, but seven hells, I’m only twenty. I see half the girls who leave school up north at sixteen and get married immediately. They’re my age and half of them already have kids and the other half work shit waitressing jobs while their husband’s run sheep and drink, and it’s just- Forever is such a long, long time to think about...”

Arya rolls her eyes.

“Then tell him that.”

“Isn’t that a little-”

Arya rolls them again, and sits at the end of Ygritte’s bunk.

“Ygritte, you’re the only serious girlfriend Jon’s ever had. You’ve been together for like, five years, and he never even looks at other girls. I’m pretty sure telling him you’re scared to get married so young won’t be a deal breaker.”

“It’s also sort of a cliche for young soldiers to marry immediately upon enlistment, then come home and discover their wives were unfaithful, might want to remind Jon of that,” Sansa comments. Arya snorts. Sansa watches far too many sappy made for TV movies. She’s heard Robb’s friend Theon make a couple of cracks at Jon to make sure he doesn’t get himself tied to a “dependapotamus” too. Arya had lashed out at Theon for being insensitive as usual, but on his rare phone calls, Jon hadn’t seemed to think the other recruits were bastions of rational decision making.

“Just,” Arya adds before she leaves with Sansa, “Don’t panic and make a decision you’ll regret later.” She should write Jon and remind him to keep that in mind too. She’ll go get some stationary at the tuck shop later. “Take your time. That’s one of the benefits of only being able to get snail mail out here.”

Marriage, Arya can barely believe it. It’s such a grown up concern, out here in the woods. She thinks of Jon, off with the Air Force, standing and marching, and wonders if he wishes he were here, even when he is also thinking of marriage.

Later that week, Gendry comes to breakfast whistling. When Arya eyes him, he rolls up his shirt sleeve.

“Made it twenty-four hours without a patch. I now declare myself free of nicotine’s power over my mind and my wallet.”

Arya gives him a high-five and Shireen follows up.

“Shireen was the one who really pushed me to quit,” Gendry confides in Arya. “She really doesn’t like fire, and is apparently invested in me living to old age.”

Gendry’s so pleased with himself that Arya hates reminding him that the canoe races start today. He slumps over when she does. Gendry’s really not suited to a counselor role, he’s far too anti-social, but he’s quite good at enforcing rules and enforcing them fairly. But the races bring out the most rambunctious and the most competitive among the campers and there are frequently tears and occasionally blood. He spends the days of the races even more sullen than normal.

The day of the semi-final races, Tommen Baratheon flips out of his canoe and doesn’t come back up. A blow of the whistle, and it’s the first actual rescue Arya’s seen happen at camp in years. The air is thick with anticipation, as everyone stays still, buddy arms up, watching the water.

The canoes are still sitting idle when Gendry jumps in and pulls Tommen from the water. He’s limp and pale, and Gendry lays him on the shore, and checks his airway. He hasn’t even had a chance to check his pulse when Tommen coughs and the air thins and everyone can breathe again.

“That was fucking terrifying,” he admits to Arya, “but...sort of exhilarating too.”

“It was exhilarating to watch,” Arya tells him. It’s true, she rarely gets to see him so confident and self-assured. It’s like watching a great athlete play, but Gendry’s never really been able to give half a hoot about competition when they played anything. It’s such a huge change, to see him so... sure of himself. It’s nice, really.

But even afterwards, he’s tense through the end of the races, a tiny bit shaken up by the save.

The night the races end, he looks incredibly relieved. That’s the same night that Shireen whispers to Arya.

“My cabin’s doing a snack raid tonight. You should bring Gendry and help him cheer up.”

That Arya can definitely handle, she’d been so disappointed at the end of first session when Hot Pie hadn’t managed to tell them when any of these were planned.

After campfire, Arya grabs his hand.

“Snack orgy tonight with Shireen’s cabin, give me five minutes to change into my stretchy trousers.”

Snack raids were always an exciting event as a camper. Despite this, Arya is still a bit disappointed in herself that she never realized how carefully they were planned. They not only never got caught, but they always seemed to happen right when there were two or three of the big ten gallon ice cream drums close to their expiration dates. And somehow, the kitchen staff never locked up or put the toppings away.

Not that any of this knowledge stops Arya from loading up her sundae with crushed pineapple and whipped cream.

Shireen’s cabin is young enough that snack raids are an entirely new concept, so thankfully they are too excited by the ice cream to truly cause any real mischief, and keeping an eye on them in the kitchen is easy.

“Y’know, the first time we did this, Sansa was completely convinced we were going to get kicked out if we were caught,” Arya whispers to Shireen while Gendry squirts the can of whipped cream into a camper’s open mouth.

“She always was the rule abiding type,” Gendry adds.

Shireen slumps a bit, her cheeks red.

“I’ve always been like that too.”

The whole group is quiet for a bit, when one of the younger girls approaches with her spoon.

“Will the cold make your face stop hurting?”

Shireen smiles.

“Thank you for thinking of me, Lily, but it’s just scar tissue, it doesn’t hurt.”

Shireen’s eyes drift downward as the girl pads away, and Arya forces her mouth to stay closed but the words start tumbling from Shireen’s mouth regardless.

“Arya, you said you thought the Lord of Light was from Essos, did you ever hear about his followers affinity for fire?”

Arya is frozen, her eyes trailing towards Gendry, who is nearly as still as she is.

“No, no I can’t say I have.”

Shireen’s tilting forward, her bowl of strawberry ice cream sitting at her chin, untouched.

“That’s his follower’s favorite topic, cleansing and blessing by fire. When I was young and my father first started making me go to services with mum, it was all they talked about. Then a new priestess came to Dragonstone, all the way from Asshai. She was different. She didn’t just like talking about it. No matter how short a sermon was, there was always a fire on the altar.”

Next to her, Arya watches Gendry stiffen.

“After that, we had to go to chapel every night, not just on Sundays. We weren’t supposed to do anything else at all it seemed. And her sermons were longer, and bigger. She made people stand up and profess things...and they burned things. At first it was just books and things she insisted were wrong, but then…”

Arya’s mind is racing. She knows the sort of thing Shireen was describing. In history class a few years they’d learned the word. A cult. Arya darts her eyes around trying to see if anyone else is listening, but thankfully the younger girls are chattering away.

Shireen reaches up and touches the side of her face.

“I had chicken pox bad as a kid, it left some nasty scars. My mum used to try and cover it up, but it always stuck out.”

Arya nods.

“I was so upset they got the vaccination like, a year, after I had it.”

She’s desperately trying to lighten the mood. She knows sometimes when people ask about her parents and her past, her words could get sort of heavy. It went with the territory, but Arya’s actually almost frightened of where this goes.

“This priestess, her name was Melisandre. I don’t know if that was her first or last name. She sort of fixated on my scars. Kept saying she would purify me of them.”

Arya’s beginning to shake as she thinks of what could be coming.

“I’d seen her...the chapel had a fire of hot coals. Standing over them was said to purify your breath. She would sometimes call people to the front of the congregation and have them lay their hands on the coals, for what she said was ‘spiritual healing’”.

Shireen’s hugging her middle with both arms now.

“She used to take my father aside and talk to him, and he always came away angry, until one day he didn’t. One day, Melisandre spoke to him, and he led me to the front. I don’t remember thinking anything was strange, until she held the coal to my face.”

Arya’s stomach churns. It’s taking near all her power to keep her sundae down.

“I don’t really remember it that well. I think I must have screamed, but all the rest I remember is the smell. Like cooked meat.”

“That must have been when Mr Davos called emergency services,” Gendry interrupts. Arya frowns slightly, somehow still being able to express further confusion at his response.

Shireen nods.

“I was in hospital for a while, then I went straight into care. The nurses kept going on about how lucky I was not to lose my eye…”

“They like to do that,” Arya interrupts. She has to interrupt. Shireen’s eyes are shining like she’s going to cry and if she cries, Arya won’t be able to stop herself and they’ll have a mess hall full of curious pre-pubescent girls who have magically managed to not hear this terrible story. “When Bran was in hospital after his accident, he said they wouldn’t stop talking about how much worse it could have been.”

Shireen chuckles grimly, but otherwise stays quiet, her eyes squeezed shut. Arya and Gendry both lean forward at about the same time and each hug about half of her. It feels so strange that Arya already knows how to do this with so much grace.

When they walk back, Arya asks Gendry quietly,

“You knew all of this?”

He nods.

“Mr Davos took us in at the same time, he used to be close to her father. He hardly spoke at all when he brought her home from hospital. We had to take her in for appointments regularly after that, for nearly a year. She had to have skin grafts and all that jazz.”

Arya stays silent for a bit.

“How is she dealing with it?”

Gendry pinches his nose and squeezes his eyes shut.

“I don’t think she is. She doesn’t say a word, and last time her parents had supervised visitation, she went completely stony faced for a week, and for another week after the visit. I used to think it was just to deal with the media- there was a fair amount for about a week on TV down in the Crownlands about the ‘mad rich people cult’ down in Dragonstone before something else took over. That’s why I let her keep going, because she never talks at all about it.”

Arya sighs. She knows that too well, sucking all your feelings in and keeping them inside until they threaten to explode.

“I should tell her to talk to Bran,” Arya says, thinking, “He was always the only one of us who was good at feelings, I think his cabin’s up for archery rankings in a few days, I’ll have to ask him while we’re at that.”

Arya chuckles. And if talking doesn’t help, shooting things might, even if it involves sacrificing one of her precious days off.

Arya has hardly seen Meera this past week because she’s been setting things up. The Mormont girl who’s her junior this year looks the same as every other Mormont. Arya has missed archery a lot, it’s not something she can exactly practice at home.

For added fun, it turns out Bran can still draw and shoot even without dropping the arm of his chair.

Bran tells her he’s spoken with Shireen a bit at meals and when their cabins share activities. Arya asks him if Shireen has talked to him at all about her past.

“Just little bits here and there, I never wanted to pry.”

“I’m not telling you to pry but...Gendry says he thinks she really needs to talk to someone.”

“Y’know of all the things I thought would be different after the accident, I never thought that it would make people talk to me about everything. At this point they should just give me a therapist’s license.”

Arya feels a smile quirk at the corners of her mouth.

“It’s because they know you can’t run away.”

There’s a brief lull when Meera pauses to announce the current rankings. Arya watches Bran’s eyes linger a bit on her and can’t resist the urge to tease.

“Still?” she asks.

Bran sighs.

“Still.”

The summer before the Starks had first come to Camp Durrandon, Meera and her brother Jojen had both spent the summer up north with them, their father having been an old friend of Ned’s.

“At least we don’t have to fight over her attention anymore.” Arya comments. Not that they’d ever really wanted the same sort of attention from Meera. Being twelve to Arya’s ten and Bran’s nine, she hadn’t paid either of them any mind that year, choosing instead to spend the summer trying to climb every tree on the grounds of Winterfell, and very nearly succeeding.

Something pricks at the back of Arya’s mind and she asks.

“Has she been being kind of distant lately or is it just me?”

Bran turns and cocks his head in Arya’s direction, his face disbelieving.

“Well it is her last summer here, I think it would be pretty normal to be a little sad.”

Arya’s eyebrows fly up into her hairline. Her mind had somehow skipped over that fact.

“I don’t think I even processed that. Her not being here with us will be so strange.”

Bran shrugs.

“Well it’s not like the conservation corps have summer holidays. It’ll be three years until she returns to civilization full time.”

Bran’s ears are a little pink, and it suddenly hits Arya that he and Meera are only one year further apart than her and Gendry.

“You ever think of telling her?”

“I don’t know what good it would do, especially now. Maybe I’ll tell when she gets back.”

“Do you think you’ll still feel that way after three whole years?”

Bran’s eyes get the strange, old look they get sometimes when he’s thinking hard. Mum had once laughed and said Bran seemingly had a soul a thousand years older than him.

“I mean, I didn’t think I would still feel this way now. I thought I would grow up and my feelings would fade. That’s the way it always goes in films. But I haven’t.”

Arya smiles, and pats Bran on the shoulder.

“You see? Things like this are why I say you’re better at feelings than me.”

It doesn’t take much prodding for Bran to agree to talk to Shireen more when their cabins do activities together, and by the end of the rankings, Arya places rather well considering she hasn’t shot in years.

That night, in their cabin, Arya ambushes Meera with a hug. Ygritte’s gone to the tuck shop to buy some more paper, but she hasn’t mentioned if she’d written Jon back yet. Regardless, it leaves Arya and Meera alone.

“M’sorry, I didn’t even realize you might not be coming back next summer.”

Meera still, but laughs.

“It’s okay. I’ve not tried to think about it too much either. It’s all so big...no more summer holidays, no more exams, no more uniforms with skirts and ties.”

Arya chuckles and tries not to be glad that the system in Winterfell didn’t require uniforms after junior school.

“I think that’s part of the reason I always liked coming here so much. It’s like all the rest of the world disappears for three months.”

And Arya realizes that’s so much of the reason why she loves it here too.

And she realizes the next day at the kickball tournament that second session is one day away from ending.

She’s in the stands with most of the camp, watching Shireen’s cabin going against Myrcella Baratheon’s, and only half paying attention when she realizes Ygritte and Sansa to her side are spiritedly debating as to the baseball euphemisms.

“I’m just saying,” Sansa starts, “Doesn’t it basically imply that lesbians can never hit a home run?”

Arya snorts.

“Well I didn’t come up with the thing,” Ygritte responds, “You like girls, make your own metaphor.”

“Maybe that means that you can still go to Mum’s church on Maiden’s Day with a clear conscience,” Arya teases Sansa, “Since according to this bit of common knowledge you have no way of not being a virgin.”

Sansa huffs.

“The bases are sort of vague,” Arya continues, “especially since I’ve only ever heard them described as second being above the waist and third being below.”

“True,” Ygritte agrees, “I mean, a fella touching your chest through your sweater isn’t quite the same as being stripped to the waist and him sucking your chest full of love bites.”

The back of Arya’s neck goes pink, and later that night when her and Gendry are on the ground behind the equipment shed again.

A few nights ago, he’d snaked one hand up her shirt and gently begun to tug on her nipples. Tonight it only takes a little convincing to make him duck his head and experimentally take one between his lips.

Second base, head first, Arya thinks with a giggle. Looking up at her, Gendry’s eyes have a mischievous twinkle, one she hasn’t seen on him a lot.

“Something gotten into you tonight?”

Arya reaches out and runs her hand along the side of his face, fingers catching on the slight hint of a beard he doesn’t bother shaving out here.

“Just thinking about some things.”

“Good things?”

Arya tugs on his ear to pull him up into a kiss before responding.

“Mostly.”

She’s thinking about how good this feels, how nice Gendry looks in the moonlight. She’s thinking of sports euphemisms and the hide and seek game tomorrow. She is pointedly not thinking of Ygritte’s letter and Meera’s job. And she is definitely not thinking about summer being almost over.

[unofficialdragonageday]

How Dragon Age Has Changed Me

Dragon Age has quite literally changed my life. It reignited my love of writing, gave me coping mechanisms to deal with anxiety and introduced me to a Tumbler full of laughter, thirst and inspiration. After finishing the whole game cycle for the second time in two years, I felt empty and devoid of all the in-game friendships and romance. At that time, I was very lonely, living abroad with my (now ex) partner. So I started to write fan fiction, something I never thought possible. But I wrote for myself, to escape, to dream, to feel less alone. And all of a sudden I was writing poetry again and short stories and now I am writing a novel. Without Dragon Age, I would have never ever accepted my own creativity nor felt brave enough to write down all the stories in my mind. In the stories I write, I can put all the things that give me anxiety, where my loyal friends Varric, Dorian and Iron Bull are always there to support and comfort me. I write about them being there when I am in the hospital getting pre-cancer treatment, when I am so depressed I cannot see the light anymore, when I find a new job and celebrate.... I know it might be a bit mad, but I feel so supported and strengthened by these thoughts. And even though I am not very good in getting in contact with Dragon Age folks on Tumbler, I do appreciate so much the writing and art I find there. It makes me feel part of a big warm family of similar minds. All in all, without Dragon Age I wouldn't be writing, I would feel more anxious and more alone. It changed my life for the better, so incredibly much. Dearest DA team, thank you from the bottom of my heart for the wonderful world you've created and shared with us all!

Submitted by Nym (https://bollplankfloof.tumblr.com)

Thank you for joining the celebration!

[mythriteshah]

The Next Act

Now well into his retirement from adventuring, the Mythrite Sultan himself was highly pleased over the reception of his Power in Beauty Catalogue’s Eikon Collection.  The Higuri Regalia was well on its way at becoming a titan of fashion – more than just a gemcraft and textile empire.

After some… coercion from his lovable army of assassin-maidservants (more commonly known as his Angels), Lord Thiji Higuri has taken a more active role in the overseeing of his business amidst his retirement.  He was making his way to his Aldenard Branch Headquarters in the Goblet when he saw his beloved family pet and Regalia mascot, Nyra, Mythrite Owl of Nald’thal, swoop in and greeted her master with a soothing hoot before perching herself on his head.

“’Tis a good day indeed, Nyra,” he spoke as he crossed the threshold into his estate grounds, the cherry blossom petals dancing around him ever so gracefully.  “At last, this realm is finally beginning to find enlightenment in our wares… and none too soon, I might add.  This battle is ours, but we must maintain our hold while we still have this momentum.”

Opening the door he would be greeted by parallel lines of mannequins leading up to the central staircase. Each mannequin was adorned in garb shown within the titular PiB Catalogue.  The Vortex Ballgown.  The Reveler’s Hakama.  The Blissful Lehenga.  The Hive Sherwani.  All of them, impeccably made and crafted with the utmost care and consideration.

As he decontaminated himself with the aid of their Allagan Purification Module, he would be greeted by his old friend and Aldenard Branch Advisor, Shishira Shira.

“It is good to see you again, My Sultan,” she said as she bowed.  “Welcome back.  We have received a steady flow of activity from the seekers of fashion in our realm, and all are enamored by our masterworks.”

“Splendid news, my dear,” Thiji replied in his usual cool manner.  “And your training with Her Grace?”

“I am a proud inheritor of the Mhachi arts now,” Shishira replied.  “Queen Chichibi is an incredible teacher.”

He gave a nod of approval as he made his way downstairs to the Angels’ quarters, while Shishira inspected the clothing with glamour prisms to ensure the “proofing” failsafe was still active.  As he made his way downstairs he would be met with three individuals: Bimala & Ekanta – his Ananta maidservants (who are essentially his Angels at this point) – and Isja, one of the Regalia’s newest models.

“My Ssssultan,” the Ananta greeted with a bow.  Isja was practicing poses in her Angel uniform until she heard the two Ananta speak, then turned to see her beloved lord, silently bowing as well.

“Ladies,” Thiji said as he made his way to his quarters.

“What geniusss has the massster planned this time?” Bimala eagerly asked.

“We will know, friends, in due time,” Isja answered in her quiet voice.  She then turned to the Mythrite Sultan and grinned.  “Remember, my lord: whatever you may have planned, my body shall always be your easel.”

“Thank you, Miss Isja, for your efforts,” he responded.  “Miss Bimala.  Miss Ekanta. My thanks to you as well for bringing the Regalia to where it is today.”

“Our pleasure, my lord,” Ekanta replied.  “We have ssseen firsthand your worksss, and you bring truth to the wordsss ‘Power in Beauty’.  We are more than honored to ssserve the Regalia.”

After a calm bath, the Mythrite Sultan would contemplate within the confines of his Mhachi coffin. As he closed his eyes, he dreamed. He saw himself in the most lavish parties and galas, with people the realm over clothed in the very attire of the PiB Catalogue.  Partygoers looked on and exchanged hushed whispers, praising the Lalafellin noble for his fashion acumen and most refined of tastes.

Plays were even made in his honor, which flattered him to such a degree that he was nothing short of embarrassed.  But it was during this juncture that he recognized the actors on stage: they bore a striking resemblance to the Majestic Imperial Theater Company of the Prima Vista, the massive airship which housed the selfsame group as they traveled the realm, bringing the magic of theater to the masses. Their biggest and most ambitious of plays was the Zodiac Brave Story, detailing the events of ancient Ivalice which led to the War of the Lions, and Delita Heiral’s rise to power.

This caused the Mythrite Sultan to stir from his mid-afternoon slumber, rising from his bed to rush over to his desk, searching over the tomes he had kept since his first journey to Eorzea.  And there it was: the tales of the valiant heroes of Thavnairian legend who saved the realm from utter destruction – the tales of his people.

Then, after another perusal, he would find an old codex he had not used since before the Dragonsong War – the Last Resort.  A Zodiac Weapon.  Its vast aetherial reserves and esoteric techniques were responsible for many of Nym’s victories during its time.  And it was this very same codex that the Nymian hero, Golbas Rombas, saved his people from the Sixth Umbral Calamity of Water.  The only piece of the puzzle was how to go about bringing his vision to fruition…

From outside his chambers the Ananta maidservants and Isja had their ears against the wall, feverishly awaiting their lord’s discovery since he sprung from his nap.  All they heard from beyond the wall was one word:

“Atma…”

Before the Angels had time to figure out what in the seven hells an “Atma” was, Thiji had already appeared from out his chambers.  He turned to them before giving the ladies a commanding glare.

“I know our course, Angels,” he declared.  “I require Auracite.”

“Auracite, My Sultan…?” Isja calmly questioned.

“We will recreate the Holy Stones as told in the Zodiac Braves.  Not precisely as they were, thankfully, but a safer variant where the wearer need not fear possession by an otherworldly demon.  We will re-imagine these evil beings and the Zodiac Braves into works of art so masterful that it will rival our own Eikon Collection.”

“I have heard talksss of your Lion Order patronsss within Rabanassstre, my lord,” spoke Bimala. “Perhapsss they can provide you with the Auracite necessary for your next endeavor.”

“Thank you, Bimala,” said Thiji with a nod.  “I will request some to be obtained during their stay; their impeccable timing has worked in our favor yet again.  Isja, are you prepared to bring further greatness to your race?”

“Always, My Sultan,” Isja replied, “and even more prepared to keep my rival on her toes.”

The Mythrite Sultan, with his path now set, was ready to commence the next milestone of his Magnum Opus – a section that will combine the beauty of the Near East with the glorious Zodiac Braves of Ivalician and Thavnairian legend.

The time has come for the battlefields of fashion to be seized yet again.

[roboraindrop]

My self shipping story

Let me just say, I adore this community. Everyone I've met in it has been so kind, so patient, and so sweet to me, especially through this healing process! I want to talk a little bit about my story, and why self shipping is so important in integral to me as a person.

When I was 11, my parents divorced. During this time of my life splitting in two, I became absolutely enamored with The Nightm/are Before Ch/ristm/as. I thought about how much I'd like to run away to Halloweentown, and the family I'd find with the citizens who accepted anyone as long as they were out of the ordinary. I fell in love with the Pumpkin King himself, and that post-divorce attempt at buying my love from my parents was all focused on that. I found myself surrounded by Jack, and it helped ease some of the pain. Self shipping then became something that kept me going through one of the hardest times of my life.

Middle school brought moving 3 times, bullies, and the manifestation of my depression. Throughout the years though, creating OCs, writing self insert fics, and thinking about characters I love helping me through really became my rock. I had many relationships at that time; Zim, Yakko, Duck Dodgers, Gru, Sweeney Todd, Chucky, the Once-ler....

I had my first steady love in Fon/zie from Hap/py Da/ys. I was in love with him for 3 years, and I wrote the most self insert fics I ever had with him! He saved my actual life irl from a suicide attempt, and to this day I have a special bond with him. Even though I don't romantically ship with him anymore more out of fear than anything, but that's a long story, he's still been beside me.

When I turned 17, though, I met the character who would change my life. I met Jer//ry Le//wis' character in Colgate Comedy Hour (plus his comic appearances), also named Jerry, and nothing else mattered. He was silly, handsome, and everything I needed at that time! For 4 years, he's been the love of my life.

I searched for years for people who felt connections to characters, for people who dated characters, but I never found anything.... Until my 20th birthday. I'd recently fallen completely in love with a certain German Crusader, and a universe that I could be a hero in. I was writing about us, and in the tags of an imagine post, I found something called self shipping. I had finally found where I belonged, with others like me, who felt the love from other worlds!

This community gave the strength to do a lot. The strength to reach out, to be myself publicly again, and most of all... This community and the people inside of it gave me the strength to get out of an unhappy situation. Without the friends I made here, I never would have been able to take those steps to take care of myself, so thank you all so much.

To mention all of the wonderful people I've met here would take three years time, but here are some very special mentions;

The very first friend I made here was @millizines ! She messaged me and welcomed me, and I was so thrilled to hear about her and Earnest 💕 they're so, so sweet together, and it makes my heart warm!

One of my closest friends in the community has been @nym-ships, who's helped me in so many more ways than I can count. He and @benobiships have meant so much to me through all of this, and without these two, I would've gone nuts a long time ago. Nym was integral and helping me see the situation I was in, and helping me get the strength to leave. He is one of my closest and nicest friends, and I'll always appreciate him. Ben is also a wonderful guy who deserves the world, and I'm so glad that they have one another!

@stuarttusspotvevo has been an incredible friend to me ever since we met. We met later in my experience, but she's been just as important to me as anyone else I've met here! Her ships are all marvelous, and I really wish that I had the words to thank her properly for everything she's helped me through. She is strong, capable, and gorgeous, and I am so lucky to be her friend!

@justafictionalthing is Meg/amin/d's soulmate, and that's absolute truth!! Ever since we met, she's been so good to me, and I appreciate it so much. Everything I hear about their ship makes my heart soar!

@littlestarprincess is so sweet, so caring. Every single time we talk I feel so listened to and so loved. Not to mention that Min is just plain fun to talk with and be around! A wonderful and amazing friend 💕💕

@robotarmjokes Has been very kind to me, as well. We have a lot in common, and she's another one of the first people I met here! She and Rhys are a great couple, and I always love seeing then together!

@lalavoice has such sweet ships, and is a very good friend as well! The way Naddy loves is so powerful and good, Salim truly couldn't find a better love than them! 💕💕

@moonametrine-rhi has been very kind and very open with me, and that means a lot to me on it's own! Her ships are so sweet, and I adore hearing about them at any time!

@void-lovely is amazing, and always offers friendship! He's been so kind to me, and his ships reflect how wonderful and deserving of love he truly is 💕💕

If I didn't mention you here, please know that I still adore you and everything you are and give, both to the world and this community! Thank all of you so, so much for giving this emotional friend a place to belong, and a found family of a different kind. I love all of you so, so much. I hope you all know that your f/os adore you, every single one of you. And I do, as well 💕

[roboraindrop]

Hey, so seeing as it's the day of selfship positivity, i thought I'd make a post for the friends I've made in this community! This by no means is everyone I've enjoyed interacting with, but these people are ones who have brought some form of joy and light through talking with me!

@0-055 Where do i start? You're so incredibly sweet, and on days when I've felt down, getting an encouraging and real message from you always makes me smile! Thank you for being so good to me, I appreciate you!!

@starbound-solivagant You have been amazingly kind to me in so many ways, and i appreciate it endlessly! You're a great friend to me, and you deserve all of the good things in the world! You're so strong and sweet, I hope you know how great you are!

@selfinserts Your ships are all wonderful and valid!! You're such a nice person, and all of your selfies have me 😍😍 I absolutely love seeing you on my dash!

@maxinas-selfships You and Roadhog are total otp!! You are an amazing friend and person, and i can't wait to see more of your ships!!!

@millizines You were the first person in the community to reach out to me, and I'm so glad that you did! You and Earnest are a lovely couple, and every post I see about you two makes my heart happy!

@robotarmjokes D, you are so strong! You've been through a lot, but you're doing great, and I'm so hella proud of you! I know that Rhys is, too 💕💕 Keep doing your best!!

@evilwives I know we don't talk all that much, but I'm waving the you/Moira flag hard as hell!!! You're such a cool person, and if I wasn't a shy weenie I'd definitely talk more with you!!

@quackwerks Your art, your ships, and your attitude are all great! I love hearing about your characters and seeing the art you make for them!! I appreciate you so much!

@myrainydayloves You were one of my first friends in the community, and you and Sho are still one of the best couples out there imo!! Live your life with your boy, he loves the hell out of you!!

@snagg-ships Again, I'm a bit of a social weenie, but i love talking with you! And Junkrat totally belongs with you! You two are so adorable together!

@maxships We've only recently started talking, but your ships are all so pure, they make me so happy to hear about! Aside from that, you're absolutely beautiful, and getting to know you has been a pleasure! I'm excited to talk more with you!

Now onto some longer ones....

@benobiships Ben, what can I say about you?? I was nervous as h e c k to talk to you at first, but now I'm more than glad that we started talking! You're among my close friends, and seeing your ships always makes me smile! You make the best jokes, the best memes, and love the nastiest boys 👀 You're awesome in every possible way!!

@nym-ships Hoooo boy, where do i begin?? Nym, the gratitude and sheer love that i have for you can't easily be put to words. When we first met I was a shy and nervous wreck, but getting to know you has been one the greatest pleasures of my life. You've been through a hell of a lot and yet you're still here, you still keep going, and thst inspires me. From the bottom of my heart I really and honestly mean it when I say that I'm so glad we're friends. I know I can talk to you about anything, and I hope you know the same is true for you! And don't even get me started on how much your boys fuckin love you. To them, there's nothing better than holding you tight and reassuring you that you're safe, you're loved, and you're important. You mean the world to me and I will beat someone to death with a rolled up calander for you.

And finally, @hakeyshomemadeships I didn't meet you through the community, obviously, but I'm glad that we can share this part od our lives together. You're my best friend beyond compare, I don't love anybody in the world quite like I love you. We have the stupidest jokes, the most tearfilled nights, everything in between, and more together. I can go to you with anything in the world and you can come to me, too. I can't imagine my life without you, or really remember what it was before you. A decade of friendships and counting! How have you put up with me for this long? I love you, 100%