#TenSura Incorrect Quotes

[violadiaries]

Rimuru: Who do we know that has handcuffs?

Guy: Well Leon and I-

Leon: *elbows Guy*

Guy: ... wouldn't know.

[master-muffinn]

Tensura slime

Y/n: How do you kindly tell someone to “fuck of”?

Milim: Punch them in the face!!

Veldora: Fight them!!

Diablo: Stab them.

Rimuru: Guys, stop! That’s not how we handle all problems!

Shuna: Have you tried telling them to just leave you alone?

Y/n: Yes, it’s not working.

Rimuru: What did they do? And what do they look like?

Y/n: An annoying red-haired guy follows me around and flirting with me.

Shion: HOW DARE HE!!

Shuna: Y/n i will have a serious conversation with my brother for you. 🙂

Benimaru: Wait- I haven't done anything?!

Hakurou: That’s right, he has been training with the youngsters today.

Rimuru: Y/n can you tell us more?

Y/n: Weird black clothes that show his belly and lower chest…

Rimuru: Okay, I think I know who he is..

Souei: Y/n let me kill him for you. Where are you?

Rimuru: Don't be stupid! He’s a demon lord, you don’t stand a chance!

Diablo: I can stab him for you! 😊

Rimuru: NO!! Why do you always choose violence to solve problems!! STOP!

Rimuru: Y/n come to my office, i will talk to him. See if we can solve this pieceful.

Guy Crimson: I don’t know what you are talking about~ 💅

Diablo and Souei: 🙂🔪

[nihilityart]

Tensura Incorrect quotes (Tumblr post version)

Spoliers for LN

[soupmonarchart]

[in a important diplomatic meeting]

Rimuru: cool! Thanks dad!

. . .

Rimuru: why is everyone staring at me?

Youm: you just called King Gazel “dad”

Rimuru: N-No I didn’t! I said “Thanks man”

Gazel: Do you see me as a father figure Rimuru?

Rimuru, blushing: no! If anything i see you as a bother figure cause you’re always bothering me!

Elmisia: Hey! Show your father some respect!

[pranksterdelatino]

Incorrect quotes: Tensura

Leon: ...Hey can I tell you a secret?

Guy: Sure

Leon: I...I actually never had an Orgasm before

Guy: Mhm nods*

Leon: ...

Guy: OH I AM SORRY! I SHOULD BE MORE SURPRISED ABOUT THAT RIGHT?!

Leon: Yeah that would be nice

[incorrect-wandavision-quotes]

Vision: [after spending five minutes with Pietro] I can hear the sound of my common sense shattering.

[totallycorrectlovquotes]

Dabi: [after spending five minutes with Shigaraki] I can hear the sound of my common sense shattering.

[incorrect-piltover-quotes]

Caitlyn: *after spending five minutes with Jinx* I can hear the sound of my common sense shattering.

[hxuse-xf-black]

Lucius, after spending five minutes alone with Barty: I can hear the sound of my common sense shattering.

[prankdoesincorrectquotes]

Veldora, reading a question sent to him: "Does Veldora Tempest like anime?"

Veldora: Yes I do!

Veldora: Hentai too.

[incorrect-targon-quotes]

Diana, after spending five minutes with Zoe: I can hear the sound of my common sense shattering.

[violadiaries]

Luminas: Just be yourself.

Guy: Really? Luminas, I have one day to win over Leon's little sister.

Guy: How long did it take for you guys to like me?

Milim: Couple of weeks.

Ramiris: Six months.

Rimuru: Jury's still out.

Guy: See Luminas? 'Just be yourself,' what kind of garbage advice is that?!

[master-muffinn]

New skill, Tensura slime

Y/n: Guys, I got a new skill just like that!

Shuna: Oooh good for you y/n! 😊

Rimuru: That’s great! What did you get?

Y/n: I was petting Rigurs dog-

Shion: Y/N it’s insulting to call the Direwolves for dogs!

Y/n: -and then I got the skill “incredible hands”.

Y/n: I'd just gone and pet Milims head and she’s asleep on the couch. She looks quite satisfied.

Hakuro: I have heard of that skill. It isn't strong or useful in battles, but it’s known to be used for massages and the person who receives it will most likely go through a really great time. I have also heard that the final form even has a healing effect.

Shuna: I have heard of places where people sell massages and the customers who walk out from the place feeling physically better and happier! No more knots and muscle pain and a calmer spirit! I believe they call them ‘Massage Salons’. 🥰

Shion: Oh really!? Let’s go to one of those!

Rimuru: No need, Shion! If y/n already have the start of the skill and if they train hard, we will get a great massage in no time!

Rigurd: Y/N have been blessed with a skill that can calm down even demon lords!!! I’m so happy!!! 😭

Rimuru: Hey! I know! Let’s build a Massage Salon! I bet that will attract more customers to Tempest!

Y/n: Hey wait! You can’t just decide-

Shuna: That sounds like a great idea lord Rimuru! 👏

Geld: I go and tell the others and start preparing!

Rimuru: Thanks Geld!

Rimuru: Y/n train hard! You got this!

Shuna: Don’t worry we happily help you out y/n! You got our support!

Shion: Yes! No pressure at all!

Y/n: Guys dont have too high hopes..I don’t think it will work.

Shion: Why?

Y/n: I'm petting Ranga right now and he looks very uncomfortable. 

Ranga: Ugh.. can’t..betray..my master…ugh..must…resist..ugh..🤤😖

[nihilityart]

TRAU Incorrect Quotes

(Beastars x Tensura AU)

|Rimuru is the reincarnation of Legoshi who is the reincarnation of Veldanava| |So basically Rimuru, Legoshi, and Veldanava are the same person.|

Lucia: "So your my husbands reincarnation huh?"

Legoshi: "I-I mean that's what they say, but I'm not really sure."

Lucia: "Don't worry I can confirm."

Lucia: *Examines Legoshi's face before pinching his cheeks.*

Lucia(whispering): “……..adorable.”

-Generator-

Velzard, setting down a card: Ace of spades Velgrynd, pulling out an Uno card: +4 Veldora, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you Rimuru, trembling: What are we playing?!

Velzard: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos. Velgrynd: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard. Veldora: But what if I die tomorrow and never eat any nachos? Rimuru: Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day.

Velzard: Can I be frank with you guys? Velgrynd: Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help. Veldora: Can I still be Veldora? Rimuru: Shh, let Frank speak.

Gosha: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life Rimuru: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years! Velzard: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this! Velgrynd: I knew I lost that potential somewhere! Veldora: My moral code, is that you? Gosha: Gosha: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk your great-grandmother left me but do you kids need a hug?

Gosha: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one! Rimuru: Tubular AF! Veldora: Mood to the max! Velgrynd, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it. Velzard, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square.

Gosha: Favorite horror movie? Veldora: It Velzard: Saw Velgrynd: Annabelle Rimuru: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

Rimuru : *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB? Velzard: Bold of you to assume I was born at all. Velgrynd: I personally was created in a lab. Veldora: I just straight up spawned lol.

Rimuru(Having PTSD from being sent to the end of time and space) : There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet. Velzard: Velgrynd: Veldora: Everyone Else At Rimuru ’s Surprise Birthday Party: Velzard: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker* Rimuru : So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Everyone: Jack: ...I did. I broke it. Rimuru : No. No you didn't. Veldora? Veldora: Don't look at me. Look at Velgrynd. Velgrynd: What?! I didn't break it. Veldora: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken? Veldgrynd: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken. Veldora: Suspicious. Veldgrynd: No, it's not! Velzard: If it matters, probably not, but Louis was the last one to use it. Louis: Liar! I don't even drink that crap! Velzard: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier? Louis: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Velzard! Jack: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Legoshi . Rimuru : No! Who broke it!? Everyone: Velzard: Rimuru ... Velgrynd's been awfully quiet. Velgrynd: rEALLY?! *Everyone starts arguing* Rimuru , being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. Rimuru : I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Rimuru : Rimuru : Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

Ivarage : Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world! Velzard: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment. Velgrynd: More or less, I guess... Veldora: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that! Velgaia: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept. Rimuru: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!

Rimuru : Just be yourself sis. Velzard: 'Be myself'? Rimuru , I have one day to win Guy over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me? Velgrynd: Couple weeks. Velgaia: Six months. Veldora: Jury’s still out. Velzard: See, Rimuru ? Velzard: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’* Rimuru : Thanks fam! Velzard: oh no Veldora: *cries* I love you too Velgrynd: Sounds fake but okay Jack: *A flustered mess* Louis: can I get a refund

Rimuru : Dumbest scar stories, go! Velzard: I burned my tongue once drinking tea. Velgrynd: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it. Jack: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade. Veldora: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn. Louis: Louis: I have emotional scars.

-Perchance-

Velzard: Good morning. Rimuru: Good morning. Velgrynd: Good morning. Gosha: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Veldora: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!

Gosha: Veldora's refusing to wear their glasses! Veldora: Gramps, look, I wore the glasses for a day. My eyes are much better now. Watch. Veldora: *points to Rimuru* Rimuru. Veldora: *points to Velgrynd* Velgrynd. Veldora: *points to Velzard* Sasquatch.

Velgrynd: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to? Velzard: Schrödinger's boys. Veldora: FUCK! Rimuru: What about cracking open a cold milkshake? Velgaia: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do. Velgaia: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison. Velgrynd: ... Velzard: ... Veldora: ... Rimuru: ... Velgaia: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.

Rimuru, holding an antique bottle: Raphael-san, is this whiskey or perfume? Raphael: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle* Raphael: Raphael: |Answer: It's perfume.|

Raphael: And what do I get out of this? Rimuru: I will give you a head pat. Raphael: |Question: What do you think I am? A chump? I would never do it for a head-pat!| Rimuru: How bout two head-pats? Raphael: |Notice: You got yourself a deal.|

Raphael: |Request: Tell them to go eat shit, master.| Rimuru: Tell them yourself. Raphael: |Suggestion to individual: Eat shit, asshole. Fall off your horse.|

Rimuru: The first time Raphael-san opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside they yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"

Rimuru walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Raphael-san, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK. Raphael, sipping coffee happily: |Answer: I love you too, Master :) |

Rimuru: Raphael-san, remember when you said you weren’t going to interfere with my love life? Raphael: |Answer: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.|

[incorrect-frozen-quotes]

Kristoff: [after spending five minutes with Anna] I can hear the sound of my common sense shattering.

[diekerel]

For your character Ask Game:

-Stevonnie (Steven Universe)

-Rimuru Tempest (That Time I Got Reincarnated As A Slime)

Rimuru: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!

Stevonnie: Pfft! As if life would just give you lemons!